#HELLO did u watch the fucking show?!
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suchawrathfullamb · 3 months ago
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some of the polls make me realize you guys do not get Hannibal. you just don't. you project too much to actually perceive the character as he truly is. you project like crazy on Will and specially Abigail but at least those you get a bit better but Hannibal? damn y'all do not pay attention to my baby
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rystiel · 7 months ago
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“pissed me off seeing the doctor suddenly being interested in men and kissing one for the sake of shoving it in our faces. kissing jack was a comedic moment for shock value so it didn’t count as woke pandering.” i’m hitting you with my bare fists
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bylertruther · 2 years ago
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the usage of tentacles in stranger things is so graphic lol like 🤨 i know what u are, bro(s)......
#making them undulate and pump things and fucking . breed inside of ppl or whatever the fuck like hello for the love of god hello#and making it so that it IS henry. it's all Him. it's Always been him. a Man made monster. imposing his horde on innocent ppl#some of which were kids. and he calls himself a predator. like. HELLO?!#he's so yuckydisgusting and the fucking. jesus. the hellraiser inspo...... the primal fear inspo...#i go insane every time i think abt it all abt HIM he's so slimy....... (said while cackling evilly bc i can't wait for s5) 🔥😈🔥#literally so fucking dark like. HELLO?! [#thts why i scratch my head any time someone Still calls st a superficial flashy vapid show bc . literally what are u talking abt bro do u#not remember wht they did to my sweet boy william in seasons one and two................... the vine... the slugs.... the possession....#do u not think tht has like. ramifications. are u new to horror ......... do u not Think abt the things u watch and consume do u not Listen#he wore that boy like a glove and will REMEMBERS he still FEELS it in his body he felt it EVERYWHERE he tried to make it STOP he said GO#AWAY it had FOLLOWED him not just after he came back but before then too and it KEEPS coming back i jus. to be a gay boy in#the eighties and have tht all done to you by a man. will who clings to his childhood and the time from 'before' it all went to shit#will who hides and doesn't tell ppl how he feels will who is coming into his own finally in the same season tht they wage the final war#against the great evil like. stranger things the show that you are will byers the character tht you are i lov u both sm .#henry who had his autonomy taken away from his and so he takes it away from others henry who perpetuates the cycle of abuse i jus. AHHHHHH#this show................ PHEW#csa tw#rape tw
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aahsoka · 1 year ago
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xo kitty is like a cheesy teen netflix show but calling it a show for koreaboos is kinda dumb like the main character is a white/asian girl trying to reconnect w her heritage + the author (a korean american woman) is a writer and showrunner ……… i just dont think it makes sense to call someone who is writing about their own culture and an exploration of it. even in the diaspora. a “koreaboo”
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alcohol-eyes · 2 years ago
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nereidprinc3ss · 1 year ago
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relax
in which spencer helps university student reader de-stress after a particularly exhausting assignment
18+ (smut) warnings: fingering, overstimulation, happy crying, lowkey softdom spencer, slight d/s dynamics, reader is referred to as a girl, ????idk i've never had to tag for smut before lols wc: 2624 a/n: been doing some insane literary cooking. lots of smut AND more fluff in the works (all uni reader... lol... ). idk if i love this but again need to fucking get it out of my word doc so here u go, PLEASE lmk if you like it!!
You don’t even realize the room has gone completely dark until Spencer comes in the front door and flicks on the light. 
“Why did you do that?” you snap immediately, looking up from your laptop screen for the first time in potentially hours, blinking hard as your eyes painfully adjust. Your boyfriend gives you an odd look. 
“Hello to you too...” 
“I’m sorry. Hi. How was dinner?” 
“It was good,” he says, crossing the room to the couch that has been your entire world for the past five hours. You sigh, releasing some of the tension in your shoulders when he leans down to kiss your head and set down a to-go box on the coffee table. “Have you moved since I left?” 
“...no,” you admit, moving your eyes dejectedly to the keyboard.  
“You made progress,” he appeases, leaning over you to angle the laptop upward. Immediately you wrench it away, holding it protectively against your chest. 
“Stop! I don’t want you to read it yet!” 
“I could help you with it though,” he pleads, bracing a hand on the arm of the couch. You look up into his hazel eyes, where he’s definitely playing up the puppy dog factor. His tie brushes your stomach, and he smells like lavender and clove and-- 
“You need to go away,” you realize, snapping back to reality and shrinking into the couch, away from him—trying to escape his all-encompassing sensory presence.  
“Wh- I just got back!” he scoffs, straightening. 
“You’re distracting me,” you accuse, throwing him a baleful look. 
“I’m literally offering to help you.” 
“And I’m respectfully declining because I care too much about your opinion to show you this essay until it’s less terrible. I really just need a couple more hours to finish it, please?” 
Spencer sighs, regarding your pitiful state before moving to sit down next to you. Automatically you move your legs out of the way before settling them in his lap and damn it he’s supposed to be going away. Your iron grip on the laptop involuntarily loosens a little as his hands begin to run back and forth over your legs. No—you must stay focused.  
“Spencer,” you whine, flopping your head back. You let the implied complaint hang in the air. 
“You’ve been writing all day. Your brain is exhausted, and your synapses aren’t firing at a rate that is intellectually productive.” 
“What is the point of having a brain if I can’t even use it half the time!” you almost-shout, pressing the palms of your hands into your eyes until you see fireworks.  
The couch shifts and you feel the warm, robotic weight of the laptop unpin you as Spencer lifts it from your lap. “Don’t read it,” you beg, watching through parted fingers as he sets it on the coffee table, and relaxing slightly when he settles back into the couch.  
“Come here,” he says, holding out an arm. Too mentally exhausted to do anything but comply, you pull yourself up just enough to fall into him. Immediately he wraps his arms around you, one hand slipping under your shirt to rub your back in hypnotizing passes. “I think you burnt yourself out,” he mutters. 
You nod into his shoulder, surrendering yourself to his warmth, letting yourself sink into a lavender-clove fog, wanting nothing more than to dissolve into it. The darkness behind your eyes glows an inviting amber, threatening to pull you under...  
But the essay... 
“Stop thinking about the essay,” he demands. 
“But I have so much to do,” you sigh against his jacket, the words coming out muffled. 
“The best thing you can do now is give your brain a rest. I promise you you’re not making that paper any better if you’re exhausted.” 
“I am not exhausted,” you insist, although your eyes are still closed, “I’m just really stressed.”  
Spencer hums, continuing to rub your back.  
“Do you need me to help you relax?” he says innocently. 
Oh? 
One of your eyes opens to peer up at him suspiciously. He sweeps some of your hair out of your face. 
“Because I would be happy to.” A moment passes—him looking down at you fondly; you wondering if you’re picking up what he’s putting down. 
“And how would you go about doing that?” you ask suspiciously. 
“Orgasms reduce tension and stress and improve brain function.” 
Damn. Why did the nerdiest, most un-sexy pickup line ever just turn you on?
You groan, burying your face further into his shirt—mostly to hide any trace of a blush. 
“You know what else would reduce stress and improve brain functioning? Taking an Adderall and finishing my fucking essay.”  
“Angel, you're such a smart girl, and you are fully capable of doing whatever you set your mind to—but I will lock your laptop in my gun safe before I let you look at that essay again tonight.” He speaks so softly, and his fingers are still gently combing through your messy hair... all in all, you put up a good fight, right? Maybe you should just listen to him...
“... fine.” you say eventually, reluctant to give in too quickly even though the idea quickly has filled your stomach with butterflies. 
“Fine?” he says, pausing his motions as you turn your head just enough to look up at him. “Sounds like you don’t really want it, baby. Maybe we should just go to sleep. Or I could take you back to your-” 
“Spence,” you whine, gently grabbing the front of his shirt. Now he’s going to make you beg? As if it wasn’t his idea? Those puppy dog eyes of his are deceiving. 
“You’re gonna have to do better than that,” he sighs, hand moving from your hair to your outer thigh. 
“Please?” you whisper, dignity forgotten as you look up at him imploringly. 
“Lean back, sweet girl,” he says, helping you adjust your position til you’re lying against his chest, legs sprawled across the couch. Your head lolls on his shoulder, intoxicated by his close proximity. “Perfect. Such a good listener.” 
Normally, you’d be quick to make a defensive remark, but with the way he’s slowly hiking your shirt up, running his hands over your sides so lightly it gives you goosebumps—you're really in no position to argue. Your eyes flutter shut as his hands grow bolder in their explorations, crossing your stomach, fingers just slipping under the waistband of your shorts and skimming over your hipbones before coming back up. 
“Does that feel good?” he murmurs, and you nod lazily, apparently losing access to your language facilities after running them dry all day. Unfortunately, that doesn’t seem good enough for your boyfriend. “Do you remember when the last time I touched you like this was?” 
Through the hazy blur of your exhaustion, you try to think back. Was it... two days ago? Three? More? 
“Almost a week ago,” he supplies the answer for you when you take too long. What? That can’t be right. 
But when you think about it harder... it is right. It was right before finals week started.  
An errant hand straying up your torso distracts you. “Do you remember what I did?” 
You flush. 
“You... yeah,” is the best you can offer, too flustered to say exactly what he did to your body. That stray hand moves over your breast. Your back arches just slightly at the stimulation through the thin fabric of your bra.  
Thankfully, he lets you off the hook.  
“I made you cum three times, right?” 
“Mhm,” you hum through closed lips, tense with anticipation as he finally slides both hands down to your shorts and wordlessly directs you to lift your hips so he can pull them all the way off along with your underwear. 
“You’ve been so busy lately, huh. Working so hard.” 
You unconsciously drop your bent legs open, brain too foggy to be insecure about how utterly bare you are—allowing him to slowly rub up and down your inner thigh. 
“I’m gonna make you feel good, honey. I don’t think three times was enough for such a stressful week.” 
You gasp when his fingers finally brush your clit, whimpering slightly when they just barely skim your entrance before tracing the wetness back up.  
“Give me your hand,” Spencer says, taking his own from between your legs and holding it up. You don’t even think about it, releasing your grip on the arm he now has wrapped around you and holding it out for him. At this point, you’d do anything he tells you to without hesitation.  
He takes the proffered hand, gently guiding it back between your legs. Your fingers meet slick, soft warmth. “Do you feel how wet you are?” 
“Yeah,” you breathe, seeing how your fingers glisten when you pull them away. His remain, running slowly up and down your clit. Your brain seems to be vibrating in your skull as warmth spreads throughout your body. 
“Who’s that for?” 
“You, Spencer,” you whimper. He hums in approval before the room falls into silence as you both watch his teasing intently, your breath baited as you try to be patient. But your body isn’t with the program, you keep twisting slightly, your hips cant upward. “Please, please,” the words escape on a held exhalation as you finally break, arching your back against him as your search for more friction.  
Without warning, he sinks two fingers inside you. The slight stretch after not having taken anything in a week scratches an itch you didn’t even know you had, and you let out a broken moan. 
“I know, honey. You’re so good, I know.” Spencer kisses your head as he speaks over your cry, barely moving his fingers for a few moments while you get comfortable. 
Still you’re not ready for it when he withdraws and pushes back in. 
“Look at that,” he breathes. 
“Oh, fuck,” you choke, watching how your arousal completely coats his fingers as he slowly, slowly begins to fuck you with them. 
Again you feel the vibrations in his chest as he laughs slightly—probably at your earlier insistence that you didn’t desperately want this. The laughter fades as you both become entranced by the sight of his fingers disappearing into you, and your stomach twists with pleasure. His pace remains languid, and he seems to delight in the filthy, wet sounds his hand is producing between your legs.  
“You okay, baby?” he asks after a moment, seemingly snapping out of some trance. 
“Uh huh,” you whimper. One particular drag of his fingers at just the right angle has you dizzy, and then he’s speeding up. Your jaw drops at the change in pace and your hips chase his hand, wanting even more. 
“So pretty,” he mutters as his other hand moves to spread you open.  
You attempt to shut your legs around his wrist, but instead he just ruts his fingers deeper into you, palm pressed against your clit. You attempt to twist away from the extreme stimulation, but he doesn’t allow it. 
“Too much,” you squeak, bucking your hips inadvertently. 
“No it’s not,” he states, like you’re talking about the weather. 
“Spencer, I really c- ah- can't!” 
“It feels like a lot, huh?” he asks soothingly, not letting up one bit. 
“Yes!” you cry, eyes stinging as tears begin to well. 
“You’re okay, angel. It’s just been a while.” 
You are so completely fucked. Each stroke of his hand feels like an electric jolt through your whole body. It is too much, but at the same time, pleasure is pooling deep in your stomach and at the base of your spine and you never want him to stop. You throw your head back onto Spencer’s shoulder, eyes screwed shut.  
“Relax,” he mutters, carefully bearing down the pressure across your waist with his arm to try and keep you from squirming. 
A rhythmic whine breaks through the barrier of your sealed lips as you focus all your energy into taking it, when the all-consuming need to kiss him hits you. You twist your neck to look up at him, observing the furrow of his brow and the way he’s tucked his bottom lip into a bite. Thankfully he notices your movement—his eyes dart from your own half-lidded gaze to your lips and he understands what you want. 
The kiss is messy and the angle is awkward and you’re moaning into his mouth half the time anyway, but it feels so good to have his lips moving on yours that you don’t care about any of it.  
“I—ah,” you cry into him, unable to form a coherent thought as your stomach drops like you’re mounting the peak of a roller coaster. 
His fingers again change their angle and he finds the spot inside you that makes your legs spasm. Attempting to hold in whatever noises you were making is now futile—the whimpers and pants turn to full-fledged keening moans interspersed with taut silences as you fail to breathe properly.  
Your wrench your gaze and lips away from Spencer to watch through a blurry haze the rapid movement of his hand between your bare legs, the way your hips buck and twist and the way your leg bends as he hooks his free hand under your knee and hoists it toward your chest. 
“You’re doing so well, honey. Being so good for me.” 
Moisture spills over from your eyes, tracing down your cheeks and down your neck as you begin to come with no warning and a desperate, broken cry. 
A string of praise from Spencer underscores your pleading moans, but you can’t focus on anything other than the buzzing warmth emanating from your core, the bright, pulsing white that blinds you and the feeling of stardust flowing through your veins. 
Your boyfriend continues pumping his fingers slowly in and out of you for a blissful few moments, before sensing the tail-end of your orgasm and bringing his fingers up to rub lazy circles over your clit. Aftershocks resonate from the hypersensitive area and make you clamp your legs shut around his hand as your toes curl and you attempt to squirm out of his grip. 
“Done! I’m done,” you squeak, rocking your hips back and forth to try and escape his toying. 
“Okay, okay,” he soothes, relieving the pressure of his hand between your legs and moving it to run over your stomach as you come down. 
You lie in silence for a minute, enjoying the liquid sensation weighing down your muscles and basking in the warm afterglow of your orgasm.  
“Shit,” you breathe shakily after a moment. Spencer chuckles. You manage to turn yourself over, laying your cheek on his shoulder and slipping your arms under his waist. He looks down at you as he moves on to massaging your back and bare hips, eyes full of warm adoration.  
“Feel better?” 
You hum an affirmation, wiping your eyes on his shirt. 
“Oh, honey, did I make you cry?” 
You laugh into his chest and nod, a few stray tears leaking from your shut eyes. “It’s okay. Not sad tears.” 
“What kind of tears?” 
“Orgasm tears,” you mumble, a tidal wave of exhaustion you’d been fighting all day finally washing over you. 
“That makes sense. Orgasms can be cathartic or even therapeutic depending on your head space. Major losses and life changes are often associated with sexual dysfunction but the opposite is actually just as if not more common. A spike in libido can—” 
Spencer pauses, looking down to see that you’re either asleep or close to it, and smiles to himself. You’ll probably be mad about it when you wake up, but he had to get you to stop thinking about that paper somehow. 
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nanaslutt · 1 year ago
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pls super nasty smut w todo where we are his favorite idol 🙏
Todo FUCKS and i know it………
contains: fem reader, fanboy!Todo, protected sex, quickie, hair pulling, dirty talk, rough sex, backshots, dacraphillia, using panties as a gag :3
MDNI
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ
Todo had been waiting for this moment his whole life.. he was finally going to meet his idol. The large man stood behind a group of shorter guys, all giggling as they watched you hug a sweet-looking fan. His heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest, he was so close he could smell your perfume. Just the annoyingly giddy group of boys in front of him and it would be his turn.
He had gone over this exact moment over and over in his head. You looked so pretty in your light pink dress, frilly thigh highs to match, that squished the fat of your thighs at the top, making his eyes roll back in his head in disbelief at how anyone could look so perfect. Todo had been a fan for years, he had watched every show you had been on, every special, he had seen every magazine, poster, and any form of media there was of you he had seen; he would like to own all of it but his collection was quite impressive already.
"Thank you for your support!" You spoke kindly, averting your body to shake hands with the boys instead of hugging them. You could tell he looked dejected, but the boy smelled like BO and you had noticed his lock screen when he went to take a selfie with you-- it was of a young-looking anime girl in a bikini.. not exactly the kind of guy you wanted up in your personal space, but by the way he gripped his hand and stared at it in awe when he walked away you could tell he was more than satisfied.
You sighed, growing tired from meeting all the fans, sure you loved seeing all their cute faces and tears of appreciation, some even bringing you gifts, but you had been standing in the same spot for almost five hours now, the heels you were wearing felt like they were slowly melting into your feet and becoming one with the skin. You looked over to your manager, keeping a faux smile on your face as you did so, but widening your eyes to let her know you were going to cry if you didn't get a break soon.
"U-um, H-hello my name is Todo Ali Its-" A deep voice broke you out of your silent plea to your manager, snapping your neck to behind you a man more than twice your size stood in front of you, fiddling with his hands in his pockets as he took everything in. You knew you had quite the male-dominated audience, but this man didn't fit the description for your usual fans.
He was handsome, extremely fit; so much so it looked like his pecs were going to burst through his shirt and you could faintly make out the indents of his abs; he smelled amazing, which was refreshing after all this teen boy musk, his voice sent tingles down your spine, and he hadn't immediately tried to touch you in some way when he stepped into your space. "Hi there big guy~" You responded, reaching your arm out to grab onto his bicep, stroking it friendly (also simultaneously trying to cop a feel.)
Todo blushed, you were touching him right now, not just touching him you were stroking his arm. He had to take a deep breath in order to not pass out. "I've been a fan for so long when I found out you were coming to Kyoto I-" Your giggles cut him off, your sharp acrylics lightly scratching down his arm as you pulled one of his hands out of his pockets and took it in yours; you couldn't help but notice how much larger it was than yours. "I'm so glad you came Todo~" You cooed, swinging your hips in circles as you looked up at him from under your lashes.
Todo froze, his face turning an even darker shade of crimson. He gulped, watching you caress his fingers with your smaller, more delicate ones. You were so much shorter in real life, the size difference between the two of you was making his brain short circut, and simultaneously all of the blood that was being drained from his head was getting sent to.. another head. "Y-yeah?" He replied, giving you a quick one over before he swallowed the saliva pooling in his mouth.
A lightbulb went off in your head at that moment. This was a handsome man who looked to be about the same age as you, he looked like he could bend you in every way your body would allow him to, and you bet he wanted to, from the way he was blushing and shaking with adrenaline. He must've thought he was being sneaky when he would steal glances down the low cut of your dress that showed off a generous amount of your cleavage.
You're not sure where this sudden arousal came from. Maybe a combination of being an idol with such a strict team; never allowing you enough time to go on dates; your exhaustion, you were on your ovulation week.. and Todo had been the first person you saw today who was handsome AND didn't try to invade your personal bubble in some way; combined with all the other amazing things about him. You were about to go on a break anyways, this might just be perfect, you thought.
"Yeah~ It's so refreshing to see someone like you here, you're so handsome and you speak so politely ~" He felt his pants get tighter at the compliment, briefly looking down at them he prayed you wouldn't see the imprint through his pants. You looked around, making sure no one was close enough to hear before you leaned it, standing on your tippytoes you used one of your hands to steady yourself on his solid chest. Taking the thin material of his shirt between your fingers, you pulled him down so your lips were by his ear.
"To be honest, a lot of these guys are sooo creepy~" Todo could feel his heartbeat in his fingertips, the loud beat of his racing heart almost drowning out your sultry voice, "But you would never treat me like them.. would you Todo?" The man was sure he was at full attention down there, he tried to adjust his shirt subtly enough so you wouldn't see him while you were by the crook of his neck, but he was sorely mistaken. You grabbed his wrist, stopping him from covering the now very obvious tent in his pants.
From what you could tell, the outline looked huge, what about this man wasn't? You smiled at him, tipping your head to the side. "I've never done this before, but I think I like you Todo~" You spoke. The world seemed to slow down, everything around you besides your voice was drowned out in the man's ears as you spoke your next words. "I'm about to take a little break, wanna help me relax?" Todo swallowed, hard, before nodding his head and watching a sinister little smile appear on your face.
--
"Fuck f-fuck Ohm-" A massive hand slapped over your mouth, muffling your loud cries. "Shhh pretty girl, stay quiet for me okay? Know you can." Todo cooed. Was this really the same man who was blushing and stuttering just a couple minutes ago when you finally met for the first time? He must've imagined the exact scenario before because he was fucking giving it to you.
Todo stood behind you, your back to his chest, arched agaisnt his pelvis as he fucked into you harder than anyone has. He had one hand wrapped around your body, rubbing your sensitive clit between his fingers and his other hand was pressed over your mouth. One of your hands was steading yourself agaisnt the sink ledge, the other gripping his wrist as you looked at him with teary eyes and scrunched eyebrows through the little bathroom mirror he was fucking you in front of.
Your panties had been pulled down your thighs hastily and stored away safely in Todo's pants. "That's a good girl~ Fuck, you look so pretty." He groaned. You watched his eyes look down between where the two of you were connected, shaking his head and his jaw dropping in a little o as he watched his thick cock split you open, your sore walls having to make quite the stretch to fit him inside. "Your pussy is eating me up-" He moaned, pulling his lip between his teeth as he gave you harsh thrusts, relishing in the loud squelches that met his ears.
"You needed this, huh?" He asked, bringing his eyes up to make contact with yours once more. You nodded against his hand, tears of pleasure falling down your face at the precision with which he was fucking straight into your sweet spot, making your legs feel like jello. Todo let up on your clit, his hand digging in his pocket briefly before he pulled out your panties. His hips stilled against your ass, burring his cock as deep as he could inside you as he released the hand on your mouth, brining the other holding your panties to meet your lips.
He balled them up before pressing them agaisnt you, "Open." He instructed. You were quick to follow, opening your mouth you let him press the fabric between your lips, the taste of yourself flooding onto your tongue when he used two fingers to push the fabric deeper into your mouth, making sure you would keep in in. "Good girl." His deep voice praised, making you giggle against the fabric. You were able to notice when all the motion from his thrusting ceased that he was shaking like a leaf.
You were wondering how he was staying so calm and composed, but in reality, he wasn't all that composed. Todo was grateful for the short break when he pushed your panties into your mouth; using them as a gag so he could use his hands elsewhere. Truthfully every time he looked into the mirror and caught your eyes on him he felt like he was going to cum, it was a miracle he was able to hold out for this long. The only thought keeping him going was not to embarrass himself in front of you, but god the though of cumming inside his favorite idol was right there on the forefront of his brain with it.
He pushed your lower back down into a mean arch, your forearms resting against the sink as you waited with bated breath for him to continue. He knew you didn't have a lot of time, so if he was going to bring it home soon he was gonna make sure you had the best orgasm on his cock before you went back out there. He grabbed a fistful of your hair, gripping strongly before he started fucking into you again, this time rougher and faster than before.
Immediately cries and muffled wines filled the room, more tears quickly welling up in your eyes as he bullied his cock into your tight cunt, yanking your head back by your hair to make your arch deeper. Surely he was messing up your hair, and your makeup would absolutely need a touchup, but you couldn't exactly find it in yourself to care at the moment. Todo's groans and heavy breathing into your ear was so erotic, making the coil in your stomach tighten with your impending orgasm.
"Fuck, I can't believe I have you on my dick like this." He breathed exasperatedly, his eyebrows scrunching together in pleasure. "And you're crying from it-" He finished, yanking your hair back, resulting in a loud wine from you, the fabric doing little to conceal that one. "Todooo~" You spoke his name through the fabric, the sound successfully reaching his dick, making it jump inside you. Todo grit his teeth, without a second thought he released your hair and ripped the panties out of your mouth, throwing them down on the sink.
He grabbed the side of your face, not letting up his incessant hips as he fucked into your sloppily, his hips losing rhythm, "A-again say my name again-" Todo begged against your lips, your skin grazing each other as your slack jaw moaned against his mouth. "F-fuck Todo!!" You cried, resulting in a groan from the man as he pressed your lips together, slotting his tongue with yours in a messy kiss, filled with lust and need. "Again." You heard him speak against your lips, his thrust speeding up, you felt your own arousal drip down your thighs.
"Todo-" thrust "Again." thrust "Fuck! F-fuuck! Todo I'm cumming, you're gonna make me c-cum!" You gasped into his mouth. He quieted you with his own, his moans increasing in volume as his own high rapidly approached him. At the exact moment, your jaw went slack against his lips as he felt your cunt squeeze him rhythmically, his own orgasm crashed over him. "C-cumming- f-fuck-" He pretended his cum wasn't currently filling up the condom he had on, and instead was shooting deep inside you, filling up your womb.
Your legs were shaking and wobbling as you came around him, his shallow thrusts working you through one of the most intense orgasms you've ever had. Todo groaned long and loudly against your lips, both of your jaws open and eyes squeezed shut as the two of you rode out the aftershocks of your orgasms together. The room was filled with your pants and gasps as the two of you frantically tried to catch your breath. "Fuck.. thank you, did so good, thank you," Todo whispered.
You turned your head forward once more, staring at Todo behind you, who currently had his eyes glued to your cunt as he slid his massive softening girth out of the comfort of your warm walls. You winced in overstimulation as he slid out of you, leaving your walls with a lewd squelch. "Sorry, are you feeling alright?" He asked, holding your hips in his large hands and rubbing the skin there. "I'm more than alright Todo, my legs are a little compromised but other than that I'm alright~" You reassured, rubbing your hand atop his, making his blush deepen.
The man looked back down between the two of you as he started pulling the used condom off of his cock, cringing at the feeling. "Todo." Your voice echoed into his ears, making him look up at you, blushing at the use of his name--he would never get sick of it. "I'm not leaving this room till I have your number in my phone." You said, picking up your cutely decorated phone from the sink in front of you and waving it side to side.
You've never seen someone nod so eagerly in your life, making you giggle. "Need to take care of you first." He said, kissing the back of your neck, throwing the tied condom in the trash by his feet before his hands started to make work on smoothing out your wrinkled dress. "Todo, I have an entire team out there for that, you can take care of me by putting my mind at ease and letting me know that this will happen again, by giving me~ your phone numberrr~" You drawled, turning your body around as he held your hips, your hand pressing the device into his chest.
The man hesitantly took your phone in his hand, staring at you with disbelief. You leaned into his large frame, pressing a kiss to his solid chest and making him gasp before you pulled back, bringing your hand up to his head to push away any stray hairs he had, "I like you, you better call me~"
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thlrlwalls · 2 years ago
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For anyone on here who’s seen me mention my high school teacher who never once in 4 years pronounced my name right.....just realized she has a wikipedia page
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skythealmighty · 3 months ago
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can you imagine if like. object show characters were active on tumblr . i mean fans on here but his account is dead so. i mean itd be fun
#rocket talk #roc save #Fan come Back we miss you
(0 notes)
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💥 fans-fantastic-features Follow
OH MY GOD NEW TPOT EPIWODHWND IM GONNA GO INSANE ONE!!! TELL ME YOUR SECRETS ONE!!!!!!
1️⃣ theoneandonly Follow
:)
💥 fans-fantastic-features Follow
HELLO??
#oh my god HI . THIS IS LIKE IF A CELEBRITY CAME UP TO ME IN PUBLIC. #ARE THE OTHER ALGEBRALIENS ON TUMBLR??? #/WHAT/
(3 notes)
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🧪 test-tubular Follow
My best friend is pacing around my lab. I think a new episode's come out on one of his shows...
#I love him (/p) but he's going to become an unskippable cutscene very quickly
(0 notes)
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⛔ nowaynuhuh Follow
i love shrimpy but it feels like he rlly doesnt ... get what i mean you know 😔 at least hes trying to cheer me up? i just wish i had someone to really talk to when it comes to these weird things i keep seeing
💼 emotional-baggage Follow
hey, i completely understand how you feel! im going to be busy the next few days with a finale, but ive sent you a dm if you need someone to talk to ^-^
⛔ nowaynuhuh Follow
thanks, ill take you up on that later!
⛔ nowayhuhuh Follow
...suitcase?
#i dont think shes been online since that last post #i hope shes alright...
(5 notes)
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💰 goforthegold Follow
Reblogging this every time I miss my co-hosts!
💰 goforthegold Follow
:(
💰 goforthegold Follow
:(
💰 goforthegold Follow
:(
💰 goforthegold Follow
:(
🎮 iamnotmrkrabs Follow
Are you Okay
💰 goforthegold Follow
Take a wild guess.
(512 notes)
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🥈 5centwonder Follow
why do people keep messaging me about hotel things?? i barely even go in two's hotel!
🥈 5centwonder Follow
yowie, you all need a hug :(!!
#especially you baseball guy!!! #im giving everyone in the comments a nice warm soft cookie
(19 notes)
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🆚️ wordswithfriends Follow
Reblog if you think Flower winning BFB was a good choice, you like cheesecake, you hate Steve Cobs, you think Platinum is annoying, you're a fan of Dr. Fizz, you watch Jasonville TV, you think Glowstick's elimination was deserved, or you're gay
#they'll never know which one #i'm gay
(3,724 notes)
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🔌 electricalmusical Follow
WHY IS THERE INTERNET IN RJE AFTERLIFE HELLO
👑 kingofeverything Follow
OMG NO WAY
🎡 not-tally-hall Follow
GET OFF OF TUMBLR.
🔌 electricalmusical Follow
YOU HAVE??? A TUMBRL???????
🎡 not-tally-hall Follow
...no.
👑 kingofeverything Follow
reblog if u dont have a tumblr
🎡 not-tally-hall Follow
This is stupid.
(10,734 notes)
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🍿 stevecobseviltwin Follow
imagine needing to be Consistent to be popular
🖍 magic-crayons Follow
You know it girl!!!
🍿 stevecobseviltwin Follow
AYYYEEEE
#idk who u are but we should hang out Now
(3 notes)
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🟢 greenyguy Follow
🅱️alls
(42,853 notes)
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🎒 liam-plecak Follow
Oh my god I finally got this thing to connect to the internet. Okay.
Hello, Tumblr, my name is Liam Plecak. I'm sorry for the tag spam, but this is an urgent enough matter that I think warrants it.
For the past year and a half, I've been trapped in another universe with little-to-no communication to anyone else. I've been reading a few posts here and there, and I think some of you might be able to help with freeing me and my friends (I think some of you have powers?). Below is an in-depth description of where I am, what happened, and who did this to me. Please, if you can help, send me an ask.
Keep reading
💥 fans-fantastic-features Follow
oh my god? liam from hfjone is fucking real????
🎒 liam-plecak Follow
I'm sorry what
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cherryc1nnam0n · 26 days ago
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On Film | OF!Eddie Munson x FEM!Reader
Summary: Eddie Munson is an Only Fans content creator who you decide to subscribe to and surprisingly, you go from watching him fuck others to getting fucked by him
Cw: Porn making, sex recording, unprotected PIV, creampie, lots of dirty talk, daddy kink, Dom!Eddie, Sub!Reader, masturbation (F and M), use of toys, slight ass play, mentions of shower sex, excessive cumming, porn watching, sexting, porn with some plot, strangers yo lovers
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The day you found Eddie Munson will forever be engraved in your mind
You were scrolling through Twitter when a video of a guy jerking off made it on your feed
You usually didn't find that as a turn on, but he was different
Tattooes littered on his chest and arms, even his abdomen, he was completely naked with his dick in his hand and said dick was big, girthy even, his balls hung low, heavy with cum, his moans were making you even wetter, his long hair clouded his face perfectly and he was looking into the camera, almost into your soul
That night you masturbated to that video...
Another day when he made it into your feed you decided to follow his account
Eddiethebanised
22, DnD Dungeon Master and your Master ;) OF with 35% discount
His bio read when you entered his profile, he was so hot and his videos were even hotter, you scrolled down and found a video of him fucking a guy, this man had perfectly coiffed hair but it was disheveled from the fucking he was getting, and Eddie looked so gorgeous pounding his ass, both men moaning and panting
This whole was so tight @Stevethewhipped
You wondered if he only fucked men, because all you could see were dicks and not even one pussy but oh well, his content is great nonetheless
The day you subscribed to his Only Fans was magical, you had some spare money and were horny as hell, so you decided to go for it
Adding your card info it and paying the $5 it took to have all his content for a whole month
And then a notification rang on your phone
Hello sweetheart ;)
You gasped at that, did he really text you?
Thanks for the sub, have this in return
Followed by a picture of his hard dick laying against his belly
"Oh fuck" you said to yourself
Thanks, it's really big
You really didn't know what to say, was he trying to sext you?
Yeah, that's what everyone says
Why did you text me?
Idk, thought you were cute
You trynna fuck me?
Maybe
You don't know me tho
Then let's know each other, my name is Eddie Munson
But you already know that ;)
What's your name babe?
It's Y/n Y/l/n
Cute, where u from?
Indiana
Great, me too
You had an idea, might be risky but oh well, fuck it
Wanna see my tits?
Fuck yeah
You sent him a pic you had taken in front of your mirror a few days ago
Oh fuck baby, they're so pretty
That's what everyone says ;)
Haha, touché
You're making me wanna fuck you real hard
Thought you only fucked men?
I can make an exception
We can have fun babe, make a film out of it
Would you like to?
We can keep your face out
You pondered it, biting your lip, he was so hot and it has been a while since you've been fucked so, yeah, why not?
Let's do it
After some more sexting with Eddie and showing him what you looked like he was smitten, he might even be in love and he couldn't wait to fuck you, so you guys agreed on a date at his place
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When you got there you were sweating bullets, you were about to be fucked by a stranger, one with a huge dick and most importantly, are going to film it for the public
He promised he would keep your face out, which is good at least
You rang the bell to his apartment complex and the guard let you in, probably used to random people being let in his house
On the 6th floor, you made it to his apartment and knocked on the door and were blown away by seeing him in person
His curls were kept together and he was wearing a Metallica shirt that was cut shorter to show off his belly, he also had some grey sweatpants that outlined his soft cock, even when soft you could see it
"Well, well, well, I've been waiting for you sweetheart"
He let you in and you took in his place, it was nice and full of stuff, trinkets, some amps, ring lights and some clothes thrown across the floor, a controlled mess as you would like to call it
"So uhm, how do we do this?" You asked nervously
You felt his hands massage your shoulders, he felt you were tense because hell you were
"Just relax baby" he kissed your neck softly "Let's go to my room, I have everything set up"
He led you into his room, where you saw all his videos you masturbated to, you bit your lip when you noticed he had some plugs and a vibrator ready, probably for you
"Alright babe, sit down and I'll start recording m'kay?"
You nodded and set your bag down, sitting down on his bed watching him start recording
"You sure you want to do this? Once we start, there is no going back"
Having him so close to you, smelling him, you said fuck it
"Yes, please fuck me Eddie"
He kissed you ferally, devouring your lips as he towered over you
"Good girl"
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"Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!" You moaned as Eddie kept fingering you with a vibrator at your clit, he had plugged your ass a while ago, your tits all out as he nursed on the left one, keeping his pace with his fingers
"Good girl baby, fuck keep moaning for daddy"
You were so close to cumming when Eddie pulled away, making you whine at the loss
"Oh what's wrong baby? Wanna cum? Not yet, you have to cum on my dick"
He pulled you by your hips closer to him, aiming his dick at you, his mushroom head was leaking pre cum as he rubbed it all over your pussy
"Please daddy"
He groaned "Say it again baby"
"Please daddy, fuck me"
That was all the confirmation he needed to push his dick deep inside you in one thrust, your eyes rolling back as he sighed
"You ready baby?"
You nodded at him, mind hazy
"Need you to use your words baby"
"Yes I'm ready daddy"
He grabbed your left leg and hiked it up on his hip, then pulled you even closer to him, your clit rubbing against his happy trail, his hips starting pistoning into you at a rough pace, your moans filling the room as his bed frame hit against his wall, the mattress creaking under you both
The camera and ring light were aimed directly at you being fucked, it was catching all the squelching sounds coming from your pussy as it was being destroyed by Eddie's massive dick, it stretched out so good you could tell he was big and the bulge on your stomach was there also to prove it
"Fuck baby, it's been a while since- fuck- since I fucked a pussy, this might be -agh- the best one I've fucked in forever" he said in between moans
You couldn't even form a thought in your head, any form of word has been fucked out of your brain as soon as he started moving, his cock head hitting your g spot so good you could see stars
"E-Eddie" you moaned weakly
"Yes baby? Oh look at you, all fucked out and dumb for daddy"
You just nodded at him, eyes drooping as you reached your orgasm again
"Gonn' gonn' aah, gonna c-cum" was all you could say
"Mmm, yeah I know babe, I can feel it, you're squeezing me so tight baby"
His left hand lowered down to your ass to play with the plug in it, making you lose it and cum all over him, back arching off his bed and a loud moan ripping out of your throat
"Yesss, good girl baby, fuck, so good for daddy"
He held you up against his dick, moving your body as if you were a fleshlight while thrusting in you to finally empty his balls into you, deep and warm cum piercing your womb
"Fuck, that's a good girl baby" he said rubbing your stomach as his dick kept twitching inside you as he kept cumming
"Fuck..." You said coming down from your ecstasy "That was so good"
"Yeah? You did so good for me"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~•~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You really thought after that you would just dress up and leave, and then watch the video when it would be posted
But instead, Eddie begged you to stay, offering you some of his clothes and even showering together, which ended up in being pressed against the wall while he rammed into you as you made out under the warm water
And after that, he ordered some food and you ate together, like you guys were used to this or you knew each other from life, which made you feel really cozy
"You know.." he said with his mouth full, then swallowed "I think, I think I love you"
You choked on your drink and had to take a second to stop coughing, to which he had to pat your back
"I'm sorry, what did you say?"
"I said, I think I love you" he said now grabbing your hand "Please stay, don't ever leave, I know we started this because of sex but, we can be more than that, let me get to know you and you know me..." He smiled at you, those big doe eyes staring at you "What do you say?"
How could you say no? Maybe this could be something beautiful, he seemed like a nice guy, he didn't immediately throw you out after he had came inside you and you felt really comfortable with him, so, fuck it why not?
"Yes, yes I wanna do this Eddie" he smiled even wider than before and kissed you softly
"Good, because you're mine now" he grabbed your waist and threw you over his shoulder, taking you to his room again in the middle or giggles and laughs
Some days later, Eddie had finished editing the video and posted it to his Only Fans and his Twitter, with the caption being
Been a while since I fucked a pussy, but this pussy might be the one that ties me down 🩷
Yeah, let's just say you never left his life after that...
557 notes · View notes
rumplereids · 5 months ago
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Stop bc I’ve had a little brainworm lately. Hotch’s really young ex wife bringing the kid(s) to Aaron bc he was late for a drop off or something and Spencer absolutely falling for her ⁉️⁉️ it’s been eating me alive (love your work mwah mwah)
part two tags: spencer reid x fem!reader. not really infidelity. p in v smut. a/n: anon, you are crazy. i love that for us. (thank u for reading my work ilysm) i hope u like this, even if it's just short :) requests are open!
He feels like he’s going insane. Scratch that. He’s actually insane.
He’s sequestered himself in the men’s restroom, tugging on his cock, biting the sleeves of his sweater so that he won’t make a noise, all because you smiled at him.
His boss’ wife. His boss’ young ex-wife.
Distinction is important in his line of business.
Spencer would love to blame you for putting him into this predicament, but that would be pointless.
It’s been a week since he last saw you. Since you last dropped Jack off at the BAU. Ever since your divorce with Aaron (the team didn’t even know he was married), you would show up to the office on their slower days to drop Jack off for the weekend.
Spencer doesn’t know much about you, only that you were once Jack’s nanny. You’ve been working for Aaron since Haley, Aaron’s ex-fiancee and Jack’s birth mom, decided that she wasn’t ready to be a mother yet.
Aaron once confided in him. You married Hotch when Jack was barely 3. You’ve always been ‘mom’ to the little boy. Aaron regrets marrying you so hastily.
You were around Spencer’s age. The fights leading up to your divorce started and ended with Aaron’s guilt for holding you back. Spencer couldn’t bring himself to care about your marital disputes since it led to him knowing you.
“Fuck,” he whimpers. White cum making his fingers sticky. Tucking himself back into his pants, he unlocks the bathroom stall with a cough, as if to hide the depravity that just took place. He quickly washes his hands, thrice. And then he leaves the men’s room, nearly running into a body in his haste.
Strong hands steady exposed shoulders. The skin under his warm hands, soft and smooth. It was you. He had just finished touching himself to the thought of you, and here you are now. Served to him on a golden platter.
“Hi, Spencer. I was just on my way out.”
“Did you talk to Hotch?”
You look up at him with a quizzical brow. He gulps down the thoughts looking into your eyes brought to his brain.
“Not really, no. I’m just here to drop Jack off for the weekend.”
He nods, and then you start to leave. He hesitates for a while, begging for the words to leave his tongue on their own. You beat him to the punch.
“Spencer?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you free this weekend?”
You fill his hands so perfectly. Your hips, your thighs, your breasts. Everywhere he cups and squeezes, as his hips smack thunderously against the flesh of your arse. You have your cheek pressed onto the mattress, taking everything that Spencer gave you. His cum, his sighs, his praise. The way he moans and mumbles your name like a prayer.
He’s your ex-husband’s co-worker. You swear you’ve read a cheesy erotica of this plot somewhere.
But that didn’t stop you from pulling him into your bedroom. Practiced hands undoing his dark blue tie. His longer fingers lifting the skirt of your sundress.
“You’re so good. You fuck me so good,” you can’t help but moan.
Spencer’s hand runs up and down your back, taking your hair and tightening a fist against your nape.
“You take me so well,” his following praise gets cut off by your phone ringing. Spencer slows his thrusts, hips moving until you’ve taken him to the base, and he continues his ministrations in tiny grinds of his pelvic bone against your clit. Your mind goes hazy at each tantalizing grind of his hips.
Your phone continues to ring. You blindly stretch out an arm to grab for it. Without looking at the caller ID, you answer the call. “Hello?”
Spencer watches from above you, watches you move your cheek and tilt your head so that you can make eye contact.
“Aaron?” you say with an almost whimper.
Spencer continues the grind of his hips against your wet and throbbing clit.
“Yeah, I can get Jack. Twenty minutes?”
Spencer almost hisses at the thought of the inevitable.
“Okay, see you in a bit.”
You hang up the call. Before the phone lands on your pillow, Spencer grabs you by the hips and maneuvers you to lay on your back, all while keeping his cock firmly inside you.
“We have to stop,” you say. “I think you have a new case.”
And then, his phone rings.
He puts two fingers into your mouth while he picks up the call with his other hand.
“This is Reid.”
“Reid? We have a case. A string of homicides in Atlanta.”
He hums, watching you slobber over his fingers.
“Reid?”
“Yeah?”
“Is Y/N with you?”
Spencer feels the way your pussy clenches around him.
“Yeah,” he admits.
Hotch is quiet on the other side of the line.
“Don’t be late. We leave in an hour.”
1K notes · View notes
doromoni · 4 months ago
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Not Over the Papaya | OP81
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⊹ 。•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
Ships : Oscar Piastri x Popstar! Reader , Ex!Lando Norris x Popstar! Reader
Genre : Fluff Smau
A/N : I missed you all 🥺. Again I’m sorry this update took way too long~ Thank you for the people who wished me better (really, ily) . I’m devastated with the news about Logan 😭 poor boy just needed his confidence back I swear.
Face claim : Jennie Kim
Warnings : Cursing, Grammatical Errors
Summary : Y/N and Oscar cope with their own breakups by making the Heartbreak Club.
Masterlist | Series Masterlist
< Previous | Part 8 | Next >
f1wags
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f1wags Y/N in the paddock! Welcome back Queen 👑
user1 She’s finally here 😭 We missed you Y/N!!
user2 She’s literally glowing , Oscar’s so lucky!
user3 Are they dating? I thought she was with Lando??
user4 Girl were where you? A LOT has gone down 🙂‍↕️.
user5 Honey let me catch u up. Lando cheated on Y/N with her friend during the winter break. Lando then posted a breakup post stating that the breakup was on both sides and they parted on good terms which Y/N has denied (it was MESSY). Then Oscar and Lily was rumored to have split (they did, Oscar later posted a shady breakup post; Lily was allegedly cheating). Then Y/N and Oscar started hanging out (sometimes with Logan). + After Oscar’s win in Hungary — He was then spotted in America for Y/N’s show the day after. Then they were spotted several times together after and they are now allegedly dating (not yet confirmed).
user3 WHAT.
user4 MESSY RIGHT?!!
user3 Is Lando still with Y/N’s friend??
user5 She’s also in the paddock rn 🤡
user3 wtf?? the audacity??
user6 lando FUMBLED so bad. SO BAD.
user7 Literally not thinking straight. I swear Lando.
oscarpiastri 5 min
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story replies
Y/N. I guess soft launches aren’t our thing , Ok understood 🙂‍↕️
oscarpiastri Its not launching if we aren’t officially a thing yet, dear 🫶
Y/N. Oh right!! were only friends babe 🥰
oscarpiastri best of friends, Luv 😘.
Y/N. Ur so annoying , I love you 🙄. Have fun w/ ur interviews
oscarpiastri Thanks dear, Love you more!
charles_leclerc is this a hard launch 👀
oscarpiastri I don’t know, is it??😇
charles_leclerc don’t be smart with me boy . I didnt raise you like this
oscarpiastri you didn’t raise me at all! you were too busy flirting with the dutch boi .
charles_leclerc I—
oscarpiastri you are silenced old man
danielricciardo oi seat stealer, please tell Y/N to answer my messages. She keeps inboxing my messages! I need my cowboy hats 😩
oscarpiastri i prefer to call myself a mental health saver. I guided you back to Red Bull 🤓☝️
danielricciardo And got me my contract money 🤑. Back to the topic! come on pls tell Y/N! she promised me a cowboy hat from florida. pls pls pls
oscarpiastri Its in our luggage, calm down.
danielricciardo Damn “OUR” luggage. I still can’t believe you pulled Y/N from him. Cheers to you mate
oscarpiastri boi you still hold grudges with Lando huh.
danielricciardo him and the entire team can burnn 😀. Im saying this again, mate… watch your back.
oscarpiastri I know danny, you’ve warned me hundreds of times.
landonorris You little shit. You really brought Y/N here. You have the fucking balls huh
oscarpiastri I did, I do . What’s it to you?
landonorris You’ll regret this Oscar.
oscarpiastri Try me.
landonorris I’ll get her back.
oscarpiastri lmao sure you do.
Y/N. 3 min
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story replies
oscarpiastri oh hello self! nice seeing you here
Y/N. He’s cute right? Such a pookie
oscarpiastri I’ve seen better 🤷‍♂️
Y/N. Really?? I haven’t. He’s the cutest to me 🥰🥰🥰
oscarpiastri So i assume that we’re ok with posting each other then 🫣
Y/N. Hell yeah! I ain’t hiding you boi. Ur mine.
oscarpiastri Possessive… i like it
Y/N. oh you’re FREAKY.
Y/bf. And Oscar has made the public ig 🥳
Y/N. I assume u approve of Osc then
Y/bf. Out of everyone you’ve dated he’s the most decent
Y/N. Decent 😖
Y/bf. That’s a COMPLIMENT
danielricciardo OI Y/N! don’t ignore my messages!
danielricciardo MY HAT WOMAN! MY HAT
Y/N. OK CHILL! I have it you crazy aussie. Osc will give it to you tomorrow before FP1.
danielricciardo Thank you 😇.
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*Incoming call from Norris
Pick up or Decline
Pick up
“Hello?”
“We need to talk. Now”
“I didn’t unblock your number so you could disrespect me”
“I’m sorry… Can we talk in person?”
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landonorris 1 min
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*messages are disabled
Series Taglist : @champagneproblems17 @itsjustfranzi @cheriwritesig @forza-charles @awritingtree @sltwins @gr1mes-cc @hwalllllllelujah @btsfluffsworld @tillyt04 @landotd @booksandflowrs @czennieszn @thatsouthernblondewiththeass @tellybearryyyy @wobblymug @alittlechaotics-blog @bingussthirdtoe @mirrorball-6 @demandealalune @heartsforleclerc @yoongi-holland @maneskin-slave @alenix @forensicheart @bloodyymaryyy @stereading @hahahjej @youre-on-your-ownkid : closed
Maintaglist : @myescapefromthislife @peterholland04 @charlottef1 @fangirl125reader @mel164 @gnarlycore @chloelovesln4 @vickykazuya @merchelsea @ln4author @qzmef @nxk1309 @styl1shl1v @lottalove4evelyn @gr3yhues : closed for now
480 notes · View notes
klaus-littlestwolf · 1 year ago
Note
Hello love reading your mikaelson fics especially the yandere ones
If u want how bout Yandere sugar daddies klaus and Elijah sharing sugar baby reader wants to become exclusive(to be lovers) but reader is not sure if she wants too. She’s scared to take the next level. Pls smut if u can
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She had become their Sugar Baby when they overheard her conversation with Elena, Bonnie and Caroline about her current Sugar Daddy being a piece of shit who just wants to fuck her and drop her, no more taking care of her.
Klaus and Elijah had never had that kind of relationship before so it was definitely different, but of course they could afford to give her everything.
Y/n had stayed at the bar after her friends left and Elijah approached her, buying her another drink and asking her to join them. She was cautious but they could see she was also intrigued.
Elijah had been obsessed with her since he first came to Mystic Falls, and while he had had several relationships over his lifetime, none of them had made him feel like Y/n did. He had watched over her the whole time he was in town, until of course his brother daggered him. Klaus had become interested in her upon returning to the town with Stefan to fix his Hybrid problem. He’d sent her a drink before having to leave again and promising to make her his upon his return to the town. They had started talking the night before when everyone had been in un-daggered and upon realizing they were obsessed with the same girl, they decided to have her together, they had done it once as humans with Tatia, why not now when they were far more well off and able to give her everything she wants?
They bought her a few drinks and just talked, asking what it was she needed from a Sugar Daddy, explaining what they wanted from her and it all seemed rather perfect. They invited her to be their date to their families Ball the next night and promised her the perfect outfit, and the brothers were thrilled when she agreed.
She had allowed them to drive her home and while she didn’t invite them in, at least they know where she lives now and they Hate that it’s an apartment on the edge of the town. Klaus went home and found the perfect dress for her to wear to the Ball and Elijah picked out some jewelry for her to wear with it. There’s no way their girl wouldn’t be the most perfect Princess at the Ball.
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That was how it all started. They paid her bills for her and she spent nearly all day every day with them unless they had a supernatural problem to deal with. Elijah loved taking her shopping, she would go with him to help him decide what suits looked the best on him, he loves having her opinion and hearing her tell him how handsome he looks. Klaus enjoyed spoiling her in other ways, whisking her away for an overnight trip to Paris on a jet (Klaus for the food and Elijah for the shopping), A quick stop in Italy when he insisted she needed to know what ‘real’ pasta was like, and even a stop over in New Orleans for the ‘Worlds Best Beignets’. Y/n both loved and hated the fact that Klaus enjoyed feeding her, he watched her eat like it was the most fascinating, beautiful thing in the world and he was definitely turned on by it.
It was a month into the relationship that Y/n began noticing them behaving a little more…personal? They became far more touchy with her, which was nice but she began to realize it felt different. The way they looked at her was as if staring into her soul, and while most Sugar Daddies enjoy people looking at their babies, wanting to show them off to the world as if to say “Look at what I have, you could never afford her”, Klaus and Elijah were jealous, possessive even.
Once Klaus had nearly beaten a man on the street into a coma for looking at her too long she knew she needed to say something.
‘We need to talk.’ She spoke as they sat down in Y/n’s room in their home that they had gifted her, now full of all of her many, many, many clothes. Both men looked shocked but waited patiently for what she needed to say. ‘This isn’t normal, and I’m not sure what to do with that. I’ve been a sugar baby since I was 16, I love it, I enjoy being taken care of and shown off like I’m special.’
‘You are special.’ Klaus responded, taking her hand and kissing her palm, pressing her soft hand to his face but for the first time she pulled away from his touch and he instantly didn’t like that.
‘But it feels like you don’t want to show me off, you don’t want other men looking at me like every other man ever! What guy doesn’t want others to look at their girl? That’s always been half the point for the men I spend time with, you almost killed that man the other day Klaus! And you! You growled at a man checking me out at the register 2 days ago! What is wrong with you guys?!’ They could see she was frustrated and they wanted to make her feel better.
‘We love you Princess. We love you so much and we want you to be ours.’ Elijah admitted and her eyes widened in shock.
‘What? No, no, no…that’s not what this is guys, this isn’t a real relationship, why would…why would you want a girl to treat you like a living bank account? I don’t-‘
‘You love us just as much as we love you and you know it, you just try to hide it, we refuse to do so.’ The suited man responded and she didn’t seem to know what to say.
‘Admit it, you don’t treat us like every other guy you were with, you care for us, and we like buying our girl nice things if you haven’t noticed, love. We enjoy spoiling you and showering you in clothes and nice food, everything you want, however we do not enjoy other men thinking they have the right to stare at what is ours. You are gorgeous, Bunny, every inch of you…and every inch of you is ours.’ Klaus growled from deep in his chest and Y/n hated how much she loved the sound.
‘I’ve never had a real relationship and I don’t want one! Men know what they’re getting into with me, there’s no hidden agenda or misunderstandings. There’s no pain when you cheat or leave and I don’t want that! I can’t-I’m sorry. I can’t.’ She stood up, walking to the door and grabbing her bag when suddenly the door was slammed shut, Klaus cutting her exit off.
‘Where are you going? You live here now my love.’ She took a step back, she had never been afraid of Klaus and unlike everyone else in the world she knew he would never hurt her, but she also didn’t know what lengths he would go to to keep her.
‘My apartment, I need to think, I want to be alone right now.’
‘Apartment? We had you moved out of there weeks ago Princess, you’re ours now.’ Her eyes widened and she took several steps back before hitting the wall and sliding down to the floor. ‘We know you love us, and we understand that you’re afraid of being hurt but that’s not an option with us Y/n, we will never leave you, you’ll never lose us, we’ll never die. We’re immortal-‘
‘But I’m Not!’ She shouted and the brothers looked at each other for a moment before Klaus kneeled down beside her, kissing her palm once again and holding it to his face.
‘We can fix that problem right now.’ Y/n sucked in a breath, looking from Klaus back to Elijah in shock but he just tilted his head as if waiting for an answer.
‘Have you been planning this?’
‘We’ve been hoping for you to agree to be ours since before we had drinks…we love you Princess and we don’t plan on letting you go. We know you love us too…please just let us have you?’ As Elijah spoke, Klaus kissed his way up her arm and tilted her head to bare her throat, kissing and sucking his way up to her jaw before down to her chest.
‘Why me? After 1000 years, why me? How do I know you won’t get bored and leave?’ She hated how vulnerable and weak she sounded but they already knew how lonely and scared she was, keeping herself unavailable to keep from getting hurt.
‘We both fell in love with you a long time ago Princess, you’ve been mine since the day I came to Mystic Falls.’
‘And mine since I sent you that first drink.’ Klaus mumbled against her chest where he continued sucking love bites onto her perfect flesh.
‘You’re already ours Y/n…all that’s left is for you to admit it.’ Elijah tucked her hair behind her ear before leaning closer, kissing along her jawline and she knew she was done for. No women can have 2 Mikaelson’s sucking on their neck and chest and then reject them, physically impossible!
Her fingers tucked into both of their hair and held onto them desperately. ‘Please?’ That was all she said, but it was all she needed to say before Klaus’ hands grabbed ahold of her thighs and lifted her up effortlessly, dropping her onto the bed the next second and tearing her dress right down the front. ‘Hey! Not the dress!’
‘Bunny, I’ll buy you 100 more dresses tomorrow if that’s what you want but anything that obstructs my view of your perfect body deserves to be torn to shreds.’ Her bra was torn off next and Klaus finally got his lips around her breasts like he had clearly wanted, or so she thought. Elijah’s lips claimed hers roughly as Klaus kissed and nipped his way down her stomach and hips, pulling down her panties and revealing her pussy to him. ‘My God, you are a dripping mess, aren’t you? Did we do this?’ The hybrid questioned just as she was unbuttoning Elijah’s shirt and shoving it off of his shoulders.
‘Answer him Princess.’ Elijah teased, biting her lip between his teeth harshly and making her whine.
‘Obviously you did! Now fix it!’ Her voice demanded and pulled Elijah by the tie that was still around his neck despite his upper body being naked before she suddenly cried out. Elijah pulled back, looking down to see Klaus with his fangs buried into her thigh, tasting her as her thighs sat on his shoulders and his fingers rubbed at her clit slowly and teasingly.
‘How is she?’ He asked his younger brother who just groaned in response, but it was all he needed. Despite their girl having known they were vampires, they had yet to taste her, wanting to save it for just this occasion. Elijah leaned back down to his Princess, baring her neck for him and licking her throat teasingly before biting into her lovely flesh, her blood filling his mouth with what was possibly the best taste he had ever experienced. His hand cupped her breast, squeezing roughly and listening to her heart beat speed up as her hips ground against Klaus’ hand, her overwhelmed senses unable to take the stimulation before she came, crying out as they both pulled back, cleaning her blood from their bite marks.
‘T-too much…’ she whined, nuzzling into Elijah’s neck and holding onto him tightly.
‘Too much? Too Much?’ Klaus asked, teasingly as he crawled back up her body, kissing over her shoulders. ‘Well if that’s too much, you’re about to be in trouble Bunny.’ Suddenly her body was completely turned around, Klaus now pressing his lips to hers as Elijah sat her up and held her back to his chest. Elijah used her slick from her previous orgasm to spread over his cock as Klaus lined his cock up with her pussy and thrust his hips up, bottoming out immediately making her cry out, arms wrapping around his neck tightly as she trembled.
‘Gentle Niklaus, our Princess is giving herself to us, the least we can do is handle her with care.’ He half teased and half scolded.
‘My Bunny is loving every second of my cock in her tight little cunt, aren’t you Bunny?’ Y/n whined before nodding her head into his neck where she held him tightly.
‘Please move?’ She begged but Klaus just shook his head.
‘Not yet love, we need to give Elijah a chance to join in.’ Her eyes flew open as she seemed to suddenly understand what he means and she began pulling back, making Klaus hold her to his chest tightly.
‘Come now Princess, we know you’ve done this before-‘
‘With One Guy! Not This! I don’t-‘ Klaus cut her off with his lips against hers roughly , thrusting up into her and silencing her complaints.
‘If you can tell me you don’t want this, and be convincing, then we will stop right now.’ Elijah promised and she just whined, knowing she had dreamed of exactly this position one too many times, he often enjoyed watching her dreams and they were almost always wet dreams about the both of them.
‘Hurry up brother, I will not wait forever.’ Klaus growled, pulling her as close as he could and pressing his lips to hers again which she tried to focus on as she was so over stimulated already upon feeling Elijah’s cock pressing against her hole. He pushed his hips forward and stretched her out slowly, pausing as she whined before continuing, pressing his lips to the back of her neck to comfort her.
‘Just let me in Princess, you know you want to.’ He teased, rolling his hips as he felt her try and relax her body again, shoving the last 2 inches into her tight hole and hearing her squeal. ‘Are you alright?’ She nodded into Klaus’ chest just before the Hybrid thrust his hips up, causing her to move on Elijah’s cock as well which made her cry out quite loudly.
‘There’s our girl, scream for us Bunny!’ She cried out again into his neck and they both loved her loud reactions. Elijah was pushing into her hard now, already fucking her ass harder than the only other guy that ever did it.
‘Fuck Elijah!’
‘That’s right Princess, squeezing my cock so Goddamn tight! I knew you would love this, your ass is so perfect, how could she not love my cock?’ Elijah was practically needy to know that he makes her feel better than that idiot that fucked her before.
‘Fuck! Please-Ah!’
‘That’s a good girl. Cum for us Bunny, I know you want to. Want us to fill your tight little holes more than they ever have been before. Cum!’ Klaus growled into her throat and just as their girl wailed, they buried their fangs into her flesh once again, the both of them cumming hard into her sore holes. Something about knowing that their girl was more fucked out and full than she had ever been before was almost enough to make them cum again.
As her breathing and heart rate began to slow they both pulled back, Elijah biting into Klaus’ neck roughly to start the blood flow before pressing Y/n’s lips against the bloody bite mark. ‘That’s a good girl, drink for us Princess, drink nice and deep.’
‘Fuck Bunny! Already such sharp teeth!’ Klaus grunted, feeling her bite her dull teeth against the open wound to keep it from closing quickly. ‘Such a good girl.’ He moaned, loving the feeling of her biting into him, desperate for more of his blood.
‘We love you Princess, and when you wake up you’ll be all ours…for the rest of eternity.’ Elijah spoke, Y/n finally pulling away and allowing them to see her, Klaus’ blood dripping down her chin.
‘Going to make such a gorgeous vampire, aren’t you precious?’ She nodded, holding onto Klaus and pressing her lips to his just as Elijah took her neck in his hands and twisted as gently as he could.
They quickly cleaned her and themselves up, Klaus dressing her while Elijah went and fetched a few blood bags, laying beside their girl as they waited for her to wake up into their eternity together.
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Elijah Mikaelson Masterlist
Klaus Mikaelson Masterlist
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moechies · 6 months ago
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hello! what are your thoughts on toji x reader who’s self conscious ab her small chest?
i have never been insecure ab mine until like.. recently? which is so out of the blue and weird
u don’t have to reply if u don’t want to, no pressure<3
no baby i get it omgie :< i have a small chest too ‘nd i’ve been insecure about it forever !!! you’re not alone sweet bby :,3
i think toji would do anything to consolate you. you’ve started growing insecure after realizing that he doesn’t make many comments on them, nor rarely pays them attention during intimate times and you’ve grown an underlying sense that he’s dissapointed :( how could you ever think that ?!
truthfully, he embraces every inch of you. nothing about you is imperfect to him, and any insecurity that you come to him with is blindsided to him.
he’s always looking. always paying attention, to every single detail of you, physically and literally. he has you engraved into his mind. your favorite foods, your favorite weather, drink, are all off the top of his head. the way your body curves against his, your sweet whines and squeals, and you wouldn’t imagine so, but even your sweet, cute, tits.
he’s like a little lost kitten when he realizes that you’re slowly starting to show less of yourself, refusing to take off your shirt, or your bra in front of him, turning your back when you’re changing.
he tries so hard to figure out why, sneaking up behind you to touch you gently, fingers tracing your waist and leading up to the soft embrace of your cute tits, but you cross your arms over your chest and push him away gently.
“stop doin’ that.”
“d-doing what ?”
“stop pushin’ me away. why’re you doin’ that?”
he’s so heartbroken, and literally thinks that you hate him, and want to break up. it makes his mind transverse hundreds of different scenarios.
“d-don’t want y’to see me.”
“why? ya know how many times i’ve seen ya naked?”
you toss on a loose shirt, finally facing him which doesn’t take much as he’s right behind you, stuck to you like a kitten without it’s mother. desperately searching for your affirmation and comfort.
“dunno why you’re doing this.” he huffs, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead before he attempts to walk away.
“w-wait! toji,”
he turns to you, taking your hand that you laid on his forearm to stop him from leaving.
“m-m insecure.”
he tilts his head to the side, eyebrow quirking up and you swear you almost see a question mark pop up over his head.
“bout what ?” you huff, looking to the side, embarrassed of having to admit so.
“my tits.”
“hell are you embarrassed about you pretty tits for?” he grunts, moving up closer to you before groping your right boob. it makes you flinch, jumping back before attempting to remove his assaulting hand off your tit. the sight of you giggling has him damn near reminiscing of the memory of the first night you two got together. what a sight.
“dunno.. aren’t you a tits guy?”
“are we ten?”
“no..” you mumble, squeaking when he leaves a pinch on your nipple before removing his burly hand.
“yeah so, fuck is a ‘tits guy’? i’m a you, guy. doll.”
he smiles at the sight of you blushing, allowing your body to fall against his, chest to chest as he strokes through your hair.
“d’ya know what i’m even tryin’ t’say? did that make sense?”
“yes!” you giggle.
“kay. was tryin’ to be romantic.”
you smile before facing upwards, looking into his pearly eyes. “love you, toji.”
“love you t—“ he’s stunned when he feels a sharp pain in his breast, looking down to see your mouth enveloped around the chubby meat of his man boob.
“the fuck?” he grunts, removing you forcefully hearing you giggle loudly. he hoists you up, and you resort to wrapping your legs around his waist as your arms envelop his warm neck.
“yeah, no. ‘s your turn now.” he chuckles when you start to scream, watching him make his way to the bed.
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leonsrailway · 7 months ago
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hello my love! been thinking about creepy stalker leon lately <3 maybe vendetta leon! he's damaged mentally and he can't stop himself from being fixated on you. like he corners you somewhere and dubious consent things proceed. IN PUBLIC WOULD BE HOT, but they don't get caught. for a fem! reader
ive been watching you.
AHHHHH first request ate tf up. something about vendetta leon makes me blush. i hope u like!!!
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MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. NSFW UNDER THE CUT
CW: smut 18+, p in v, fingering, oral (f! receiving), dubcon, semi-public sex, stalking, obsession, masturbation, leon being a creepy perv, age gap (reader is like 22), noncon photography, choking, size kink if u squint and tilt ur head
fem! reader
divider: @leonsdolly
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hes not a weirdo. really! he never meant for it to go this far.
it was a random day last august when he wandered into the restaurant you worked at. but as soon as you came to his table and introduced yourself with that pretty little smile and those big doe eyes, he knew he'd been in trouble. after a short pause, he turned his charm on and started a conversation with you.
then he found himself back the next day. and the next.
he swore the only reason he showed up was for the coffee, which was the laziest excuse he could muster considering the coffee was from K-Cups, but you didnt seem to mind. every time you worked, you found your eyes glancing to his booth hoping to see his dark hair poking over the top of the booth in front of him. he could see the way your eyes lit up when you saw him, he just hoped you didnt notice the way his cock twitched when his eyes locked with yours.
during your small talk at his table, even after he learned you were half his age, he could only ever think about the way his large, rough hands would feel running all along your body, from your pretty tits, to your waist, to your thighs, to your- oh shit, what were you saying?
"you with me, Mr. Kennedy?" fuck, he loved when he heard his name leave your lips. "uh, yeah, sorry. long night. what were you saying?"
"did you want your regular?" you were smirking, almost mocking how distracted he was.
"yea, add something for yourself pretty lady, come sit with me on your break?"
leon had been a regular of your months. he looked to be in his late 30s-early 40s, and you'd be lying if you said his little nickname didnt make your knees a little weak.
"as much as id love to, Mr. Kennedy, i cant today. but i can definitely get that order in for you" you reluctantly deny his request.
he didnt appreciate that.
-
after a week of discreetly following you home after your shifts, he'd learned your routines. what time you shower in the evening, what time you have dinner, what time you touch yourself when everyone else falls asleep...
leon invested in some binoculars from the local nerd store and even found a little bush he could hide in perfectly angled to show him your bedroom. he even bought himself a new camera so he could take pictures of you when you look your best, oblivious.
when you had gone off to work one day, he snuck in right as you left. he's not sure what possessed him to do this, he used to be such a good guy. he wanted to protect and serve and... now look at him, rummaging in some 20 somethings underwear drawer.
-
you slam the register shut after counting your money for that night, it had been a long one. full of old men, not leon, telling you to "smile for them" or snapping at you for a refill of their sweet teas. everyone else had gone home for the night, and you were just about to lock up. your body ached, you felt like falling on the nearest flat surface and knocking out for the week.
until you heard the bell ding.
"we're close-" you were cut off by yourself when you saw who walked in, "oh, hey Mr. Kennedy."
theres his girl. "hey honey, you alright? you look tired" he approached you from behind.
"its been a long day, but nothing i can't handle. i was actually just about to lock up the restaurant... so.." you trail off, hoping he may get the hint that you just want to go home.
"well good thing i came in, huh?" he laughs, and so do you, but you didnt find it too funny. he was starting to stand a little bit too close to you for your comfort, even though you trusted him.
"i guess" you say, blushing when he gives you a look that made you almost rip off his shirt right then and there. but you cant, thats wrong, what would your parents think?
"you look pretty, angel" leon says, tilting your head up to look up at him. god, he was tall, and his one hand could cover your whole face.
"t-thank you Mr. Ke-"
"Leon. call me Leon"
"thank you, leon" you reply, crossing your arms, tensing up. you knew you shouldn't be feeling this way, it isn't professional.
he couldnt hold himself back anymore. whether it was the way your big pretty eyes looked up at him like a trap, or the way his hand was finally grazing your soft skin, something made him bold enough to kiss you.
"Le- Leon... we can't" you made out between kisses, as much as you were denying him, you were still kissing him back, that kept him going.
"we can't? that's too bad..." he mutters in your ear, breath fanning against your neck as his fingers wandered below your waistband, "because im gonna do it anyway"
you squirmed against him but you couldn't deny the way you mewled in his ear when he grazed your clit through the thin fabric of your panties. he laughed meanly in your ear before putting his free hand around your throat and gently squeezing when he applies the slightest pressure to your clothes clit, making you moan, "i knew you'd like that". he lays you down in a booth in the empty restaurant.
"p-lease... fuck" you tugged at his shirt, shyly asking for more. he laughs at the change in your charcter from only a moment ago, before ultimately complying with your silent request. he rips your clothes off and leaves a trail of sloppy, wet kisses from your neck, to your tits, to your stomach, and finally down to your pussy.
he gazes up at you with the hungriest eyes youve ever seen, glazed over and half lidded yet so focused on you. he makes out with your cunt, his nose bumping into your clit as he slips his tongue in and out of your hole, making lewd, borderline pornographic sounds. you were a wreck, writhing under him and grinding your hips into his face as he moaned incoherent praises into you, the vibrations making you soak his face more than you knew you could.
he eventually sticks two fingers into you as he sucks on your puffy, neglected clit, and once he curls his fingers to the spot that makes you jolt, he keeps on hitting that spot again and again and again until you cum in his mouth. he doesnt stop then, using his tongue to clean up your mess until you're pushing him away, a stupid cocky grin plastered on his wet lips.
you didn't realize you were taking his belt off until his cock was in front of you. he was big, leaking precum from his pretty pink tip and his eyes were piercing yours as he pumped himself a few times before lining himself with your entrance, the two of you gasping in tandem as he bottomed out inside of you.
tears pricked at your eyes as he began to move, the pain and pleasure and overstimulation from your last orgasm all combining and making a cocktail of sensations you've never experienced before. your head lolled to the side and you squeezed your eyes shut while leon rocked you into next year, until he just almost cuts off your airway and forces you to face him and look in his eyes as he drills into you like a jackhammer.
"ah-ah-ah-f-uuuck, Lee!" you moaned into his neck as you scratched pretty red lines down his back, making him grit his teeth to keep from letting out a whine he'd only heard when cumming in the panties he stole from your room
"i know pretty girl, feels good doesn't it?" he lets up on your throat, not that you could catch your breath at the rate he was plowing you. "y-yes- i'm cumming, oh my god im cumming" your eyes roll into the back of your head and you draw blood from biting your lip.
"go ahead princess, im right there with you" he grunts, slightly angling to hit you impossibly deeper, which was your final straw, you let out a string of curses and chants of his name as you cream his cock, he spills his load inside of you. not that you're that angry, his warm cum spilling out of you felt so nice you couldn't dare be angry.
the two of you catch your breath in silence until leon snaps a photo of your leaky cunt, both of your cum spilling onto your thighs.
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nor-4 · 7 months ago
Text
Formula 1 Incorrect Quotes with reader Two
F1IQ - Part One
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Y/n: Bitch why don't you shut the fuck up before i slit your throat and watch the honor roll out?
Max: Are you threatening me??
Y/n: No, I'm hitting on you, flash me a titty bitch.
Lewis: Yeah uh, there's something I've been wanting to say lately.
Y/n: Oh what's that?
Lewis: The N-Word
Y/n looking at toto: Look at your dad. Such a dork, keeping bees.
Y/n: I mean atleast it's interesting though. At least like, i wish my dad kept bees.
Y/n: I mean it's kind of cute. Like, your dad keeps bees.
Y/n: How old is your dad? He's obviously beekeeping age. I dont know. I think It's kind of sweet.
Y/n: George, i wanna fuck your dad.
George: Oh really?
Yuki: Hey can i sit with you?
Y/n: Why
Yuki looking at stroll and ocon: The kids at the other table keep throwing ketchup packets at me.
Y/n: You're not covered in ketchup, though
Yuki: They don't know you have to open it first
Y/n: Damn. We need remedial bullying class too.
Yuki: So how do you like your remedial english?
Y/n: I guess it's whatever. My mom was really pissed, though.
Yuki: Yeah? What about your dad?
Y/n: My dad killed himself.
Charles: I'm finally seeing someone good for me.
Alex: Omg who is it?
Charles: A therapist
Y/n: max is pissing me off *20 minutes ago*
Y/n: nvm just got dicked down
George: Girl what..
Fernando: Every time i talk to you i feel confused.
Fernando: I've never met anyone that speaks like you do
Y/n: Stop lovebombing me
Fernando: what? It's not a compliment
Fernando: You scare me
Y/n: What are you hiding from me?
Zhou: Nothing..
Y/n: Zhou Guanyu.
Zhou pulls out a cat: The cat distribution system chose me okay
Y/n at drive to survive: If he cheats on you, put hair remover in his shampoo, you wanna act like Andrew tate, u gon look like him too.
Lewis wearing a beanie: I CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS FOREVER
Toto: That's your fault. Being too quick signing your seat with ferrari
Oscar: Are you high?
Lando: Am i what?
Oscar: High
Lando: Hello
Christian: So what could a Mercedes principal possibly have then?
Y/n: I just feel like he'd be into satan-worship, or at the very least have a sex diary.
Christian: A toto wolff sex diary would be horrifying. He's like our rival.
Y/n: We say that about Stephen king books, we still read those.
Daniel: "Dear diary, hot candle wax hurts so good"
Christian: No it'd probably be like a thesaurus of words for "Good"
Daniel: Yeah he probably sexts with perfect grammar.
Y/n: "My wife showed an exquisite exhibition of lust for me."
Toto: Let me try something different here. Do you guys have thoughts and feelings for one another?
Y/n: Uhh i think George's kinda spoiled
George: And i feel like y/n's a bitch
Y/n: What're you gay?
Alex: What.. How did you know? I've never told anyone that.
Y/n: Dude look at your hair dye, you're either gay or color blind.
Lance: bro stop chanting in dead language's your scaring the hoes
Y/n: Bitch you is so lonely I'm summoning the hoes
Sebastian: You used to be shy, now you're a whore
Y/n: There's a thing called character development
Oscar: Reminder that I'm very sweet and endearing so be nice to me
Carlos: or what
Oscar: or I'll punch your lights out
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Hey yall this is a bit short cause I'm finna make a random crack twitter posts n I'll post it in the most random day. I love yall baby💋
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