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Beatnik - The Clean (1982)
#The Clean#Beatnik#1980s#1982#Anthology#2000s#2002#Great sounds great good sounds good so-so sounds so-so bad sounds bad rotten sounds rotten#Dunedin#New Zealand#Dunedin Sound#Nz#New Zealand Music#music#Flying Nun#Aotearoa#Otago#Otepoti#Indie#Indie Rock#SoundCloud
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Good People
Part One🦇Part Two🦇Final Part
Wayne knows eavesdropping isn't the done thing. He's definitely old enough to know better, and he wasn't going to. He had a plan. He was going to walk directly into the living room, so they'd know he was awake, and after he'd fixed his cup of coffee, he'd plopped into his perfectly worn in recliner and subtly glare at the Harrington boy until he squirmed.
Mostly because it amused Wayne, but also just a little sliver of it was because he wanted the Harrington boy to know Wayne didn't think he was good enough for his boy. But only a little! Lord knows that Wayne couldn't do anything to make Eddie change his mind about Steve Harrington, short of Harrington proving Wayne right. Which he doesn't actually want because he doesn't want Eddie hurt.
He's just... He expects it to happen. That's what boys like Harrington do to boys like Eddie. He's seen it enough times to know that this song and dance leave no room for improvisation. Boys like Harrington play around, get their kicks with the devotion Eddie shows them, and then when they've had their fill, they leave.
Boys like Harrington will never be good enough for Eddie, but they always leave with Eddie feeling like he's not enough. Wayne hates it.
Anyway, his plan wasn't to eavesdrop. It's just that Harrington said his name and Wayne found himself standing still instead of continuing.
"Why doesn't Wayne like me?" Harrington asks.
"This again?" Eddie says dismissively, which has Wayne agreeing. His opinion shouldn't have bearing on their friendship.
A deep sigh from Harrington before, "I just. It's- he means so much to you. And, like, I- nevermind. It's stupid. I'm stupid."
"Hey," Eddie sounds a type of serious that Wayne rarely hears from him, "you're not stupid. And you gotta quit fucking saying that. You say it enough and you'll start to believe it and it's not true."
"Hard to quit feeling stupid when people dismiss my concerns like they are stupid," Harrington snaps back, bitchy as can be. The tone makes Wayne bristle on behalf of Eddie. His boy doesn't reply immediately, though. Doesn't bite back like Wayne's used to hearing. Huh. Maybe he's growing up, just a little.
"You're right, Steve," Eddie says when he finally speaks. "That was dismissive. I'm sorry. Explain it to me. Why does it matter to you whether Wayne likes you or not?"
"Well, because he's your family."
"Yeah," Eddie agrees, "he is. But that doesn't explain why it matters. I don't care if your parents like me or not."
"That's different!"
"How?" Eddie asks, soft but firm.
"Because their opinion doesn't matter. It's not- It's irrelevant. What they think."
"That makes no sense. Wayne's opinion matters because he's my family, but your parents' opinion doesn't even though they're your family?"
"Yes!"
"But why?" Eddie presses.
"Because they're bad people!" Steve bursts, not quite shouting but close. "Because when bad people don't think highly of you, it's not a fault in you. Their disproval is, like, a compliment. They don't like you because you're too different from them. And that's great! You shouldn't want their approval. It's different, because your uncle is a good person. And when a good person doesn't like you, it is your fault. It's something- it's..." Harrington loses steam here, voice dropping low and defeated, "there's something wrong with me. Something in me that- that he just knows. Senses about me or whatever. Something wrong or rotten or-"
"Steve! That's bullshit. Sure, Wayne's been standoffish, but he'll come around. You're not wrong, or rotten, or whatever else you think you are."
"How do you know that? I was an asshole most of life and what if that's just the real me? What if that's who I'll always be deep down. 'Cause I'm trying so damn hard, man. I'm giving it my all trying to be a better person and it's not enough! Everyone still talks about who I was in high school and even you-" Harrington snaps his mouth closed so hard that Wayne hears the clack of his teeth from his position in the hallway. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to- I'm sorry."
"Steve. This is about more than just my uncle's opinion of you, isn't it?"
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."
"I want you, too. I want to know if I've ever done anything to make you feel like you aren't enough."
Wayne really shouldn't be listening. He should back down the hall and into his room. Give them time to talk.
"No, Eddie, you don't make me feel like- that's not what I meant. I just. I'm...."
"Hey, Stevie, you can tell me."
"I'm just so afraid that... That one day everyone will wake up and realize what Wayne already knows. That I'm not good enough for them. For you."
Oh. Wayne really shouldn't be listening.
"I'll admit that Wayne's opinion is important to me, for a lot of things. But not about you. What I feel about you, how I feel about you, isn't dictated by Wayne."
"Sure. I mean, I know that, like, logically or whatever. But it's. I can't convince my brain that you won't just. Hate me one day. And I- fuck, Eddie, I'm already halfway in love with you and-"
"You're in love with me?" Eddie interrupts, sounding awed, starstruck, and Wayne cannot be listening anymore. He backs down the hall silently and back into his room.
Steve Harrington seems to think that he's a good person, but he's not feeling like a good person at the moment.
He's got some thinking to do.
#steddie#my fic#wayne munson#eddie munson#steve harrington#wayne pov#wayne doesnt like steve and steve cannot accept that#not doing a readmore because its very short.
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Hi Neil.
I know you are flooded with asks and this somehow became extremely long. Too long. “Why am I suddenly telling this poor man my life story?” too long. “I think I’d rather he work on the GO3 script than read this wild beast” too long. “He’s going to think you’re criminally dangerously insane” too long. If you never get to it, I’m good with never seeing a response from you. Maybe it’s better that way? Maybe an anon would have been nice here. But, it’s 2024, so I say “we ball.” It’s a privilege to be able to send this to you at all. You get a lot to this effect and I hope they give you good feels, so maybe what’s the harm, yeah? Because this is not an ask. This is a thank you letter.
First, thanks for reblogging my therapist post, I hope it amused you. I nearly sent you “How am i supposed to explain this to my therapist?!” But refrained. At that time.
So, therapy. What is therapy really? Well…
Things have been really rotten for as long as I can remember. Bad health, bad doctors, bad relationships, bad coping mechanisms, bad all kinds of things. (Yeah, bad is a weak and unhelpful word, my therapist reminds me, but we’re doing this.)
Well, things got even more really really rotten and BAD these last few years. Health declined further, coping mechanisms declined further and more intensely, packed up my life, applied for disability, moved back in with my parents across the country.
Then 4 years ago last week I watched my fiance die of a sudden heart attack. I was 29. Two years later my best friend died. Then last summer I sauntered vaguely into a cancer scare. Not long before an operation my cat who has been my companion through so much garbage died as well. I’m not entirely in the clear on the cancer scare front. All my attempts at going back to work, volunteering, going to grad school - they collapsed on me because I couldn’t get through this STUFF.
(Sometimes when I talk about this, when I tell people, I think “they are going to think you are a raging pathological liar.” Because I’m not sure I would believe someone if they told me all of this happened to them. In such a short time period. All before they were 35. And hell if that hasn’t been isolating. You know how it sounds? Lonely. And it is.)
I did the hypervigilant and sensation/experience chasing stage of PTSD. It got me in a lot of trouble in all kinds of ways. I had to do a lot of medical and psych advocating because things kept getting worse. That was exhausting. Then that peaked. I went into the thick of the “I feel absolutely nothing” stage for a long time. I didn’t feel fatigue or hunger or thirst. Not people, feelings, a reason. Not hope.
But of course, like seems be for a lot of us, I somehow found Good Omens at just the right time. I was a very “I’m so cool and intellectual I mostly consume non-fiction media” person for too long. Like, what? How is that even a real thing? And it wasn’t real. It was just part of this curated autism mask that I don’t think anyone really bought anyway.
I think I got to a point where I’d just had too much reality. I needed fantasy. I didn’t realize I always needed it. But I denied myself for too many odd and painful reasons. Maybe I thought it was an escape I didn’t deserve.
But as it turns out, it wasn’t an escape. I watched both seasons last fall, and then this light came on. I watched it again and again.
I came to tumblr because I needed more. I found this fandom. I stepped into this beautiful world of fanart and fanfiction and brain flexing meta writing and a sense of community and wonder that you and Terry created - that everyone involved in the show inflated - exploded in the right way - like fireworks if fireworks were some kind of autocatalytic reaction - a self perpetuating force.
It’s not a “saved my life” feeling. Not a “getting my life back” feeling. It’s been a “maybe it’s time for you to have the life you’ve always been denied - that you’ve denied yourself” feeling.
I’m creating. I’m not “great” yet. Not terribly “good” at all. Maybe “behind” as far as the “proper” timeline for starting. I know there isn’t one, not really, but boy does that society machine make ya feel like there is. And sure, I started and stopped a lot in the past. But the second it got hard I always gave up. I felt like if I didn’t get it “right” to begin with, then I just didn’t have it in me at all. But for once I’m really in it. I’m writing and trying to draw things that look less like fever dream five year old drawings. (Not that there’s anything wrong with those, is there? 🙃) I’m eating better. I’m sleeping better. I reach out to old friends more. I’ve made new friends who share this love of Good Omens.
My therapist has been floored by the change in me. After that first funny mini flop, he has been so encouraging about it. I saw him this week and I said “Maybe this is helping me get prepared to start living again. Maybe it’s a springboard.” And he honest to god said “But You ARE living. This is YOU LIVING. Why does it have to be a springboard? Why do you have to turn this into ‘work?’ Just let yourself have this for once in your life.”
But there were two more added elements that made it all work. And I can’t help but think this whole brainrot thing wouldn’t have happened without them. So many things just happened all at just the right time - a proper coincidence.
In all of the madness of the last few years I finally got the memo that I'm autistic. i figured I was for a while. But it finally sunk in for me and my docs and my people. So I’d been working on unpacking that. Grieving the life that could have been entirely different, shedding the mask. I let myself hyperfixate openly instead of hiding it and hating myself for “spiralling” or “obsessing” like others -!like ‘I’ always punished myself for before we knew that it was a trait and not a personality flaw.
Then over the last few months my therapist and I started trying this new exercise. One session he stopped me and said “in the last 20 minutes you have responded to what I’ve said with 9 ‘I knows.’” My response to that? “Ugh, I know.” So we started this “I know” swear jar type situation. Really, I’ve been afraid of not knowing. I couldn’t let myself “not know.” Because it meant I was “dumb.” I was just drowning for so long in guilt and self loathing for the “I knew better and screwed up anyway.” Or “I should’ve known better - I should know that by now.”
As it turns out, there’s a lot of things I don’t know. That I didn’t know. Things I will never know. And refusing to admit all of that kept me from learning a damn thing. Kept me from asking questions. Kept me from trying new things because it was scary to do something new - something unknown - and I "knew" how it would all turn out anyway. Kept me from connecting with people because it was painful or embarrassing when they knew things I didn’t and it seemed like I already should have. Kept me from getting better at making art, music, writing. Kept me from forgiving myself. Kept me from growing. And kept me from moving forward. Maybe not on. I don’t know if we ever “move on” from things. But we can move forward as we carry them. And as we do, the weight gets less. We’re able to carry it better. But only if we can admit that we don’t know how. Only if we don’t treat ourselves like this is something we do know or should know and we’re just failing because we’re less than. Not good enough. Not strong enough. Not deserving. We have to be able to say “I don’t know how to do this.” And then we can start looking for the answers. We can ask. We can learn.
I thought about the apple. Being able to tell the difference between good and evil. Aziraphale’s years and years of watching what he “knows” to be true be proven wrong. Crowley’s need to ask questions…
The simple and enormous gift of “Knowledge.” The “Knowledge” of the difference between Good and Evil. The “Knowledge” that can only be gained by realizing, accepting, admitting that there are things we don’t know. Asking the questions. Sometimes we get answers we don’t like. Sometimes the consequences of asking hurt us. And unless you want to stay in that painful place that painful knowledge got you, well, you’ve got to let yourself learn how to get out.
So all of this good? I never expected this. I never thought I deserved it. Joy and belonging and this sense that “Yeah, maybe things can get better. Maybe things can be good.” Because I said those things, not truly believing them, to the people I thought needed to hear it. But it couldn’t save them. It was hollow. The proof for us wasn’t really in our orbit or on our radar at the time. And now they’re gone.
People always say “it’s never too late.”
One of the people I lost said “it’s later than you think.”
I jokingly would respond “it’s already too late.”
It was for him in the end. For them. For some people I guess it really is. But maybe a lot of the “too late” people are there because they think “they know” that things will never be good for them. So they stop looking, they stop asking, stop finding. And eventually they just stop.
Then there came Crowley’s “It’s always too late.” The first time I heard it I thought “For sure, Crowley-cakes, I KNOW.”
But then…I just needed to rewatch the whole thing. And lines like that…familiar things…familiar themes…I was suddenly identifying with these characters. I suddenly saw myself. And the realization hit - I connected with something! Something new. And I FELT THAT. And that tiny little crack that made in the wall was just enough to start breaking it down. Yeah, when you start letting yourself feel after not feeling for so long, opening up to the good feelings means opening up to feelings and then the bad ones come out too. But when there IS good … it helps you balance. You can deal with the bad a little better because you’ve got the good thing to lean against when it gets too much. And now you’ve got feelings. You’ve got good and bad. You’ve got sticky foggy grey. You’ve got life.
Whew.
So, TLDR, thank you. From the bottom of my slowly healing heart, thank you.
And to sign off with some shits and giggles… I couldn’t find this in existence as a sticker so I had to custom order. Perhaps this will spread misery and panic among the humans of my city - or at least a malignant and creepy sense of unease.
Or maybe they’ll say “wtf” and go home and google it and they’ll fall into the Good Omens hole they never knew they needed too.
Thank you for this. I never quite know what to say to messages like this apart from I am really glad that it helps. (It becomes the weird extra piece that I worry about when writing season 3 -- hoping that it will be that thing again. Not just a story, but something that helps people feel and helps with healing and helps with love.)
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hey! I'm not really into nsfw stuff- sooo would you like to do something soft with reo? 😭 like, idk, him as a husband or father so with a family? THANK YOU SO MUCH 💗💗
✮⋆˙ domestic reo headcanons ✮⋆˙
a/n: this is so brain rotted i can’t even lie i think reo is just so easy to romanticize. pure fluff.
• | BLUE LOCK M.LIST | enjoy !! - aria 💜 | •
✮ I actually love this because i headcanon that reo would be a great dad :D at the very least he’d be extremely supportive of whatever his children wanted to do in their lives. He wouldn’t force them to follow in his footsteps like his father and he’d use whatever devices he could to ensure they can comfortably follow the path they choose.
✮ Would post about all his children’s accomplishments, or if you guys didn’t feel comfortable posting the kids he’d still take any chance to tell everyone about it - even his teammates who literally don’t care that his son got the highest score on the spelling test (they’re happy for him though). He secretly enjoys scrapbooking for his kids but they’re “your books” and he “just helps you with it sometimes”. (he’s the one who took almost all the pictures and saved every piece of paper his kid has ever drawn on)
✮ Reo is a charming husband, so charming and sweet it’s hard to be mad at him. He’s a bit lacking in cleaning/caretaking capabilities when it comes to the home but he puts in the effort??? He tries his best and if he does a bad job he always makes it up to you one way or another. In all honesty, he’s probably already hired people to do that (forgot this man is inheriting a multi millionaire dollar corporation).
✮ Reo is however very good at taking care of children. Once he has a clear grasp of their needs, he finds it to be really enjoyable and fulfilling. He takes a lot of pride in whatever happiness and comfort he can bring to his kids. He hates the sound of his babies crying, not because it’s annoying (though he complains about that too) but because it genuinely hurts his soul. He can be a bit too worrisome about it sometimes - he’s totally the type of person to look up his child’s symptoms and freak out over seeing all the worst case scenarios.
✮ The one thing that reo particularly excels at is taking care of you when you’re sick. He can always tell when you’re not feeling your best and he immediately harps on you. He doesn’t know how to cook very well but he knows how to make a few different kinds of warm foods to fill your stomach and give you a little energy. He’d absolutely refuse to stay away from you (unless it was a seriously contagious illness or if you guys had a baby that could’ve gotten sick). Doesn’t care if you’re sneezing and coughing and wheezing, he wants to feed you and hold you and kiss your hot head until it cools down and everything is better again. His goal is always to make sure you get better as soon as possible and won’t let you do anything but rest and relax until then.
✮ Reo is an incredible gift giver! I’ve certainly mentioned this in another hc post, but he is always out and about buying you little things that remind him of you. If you guys have a kid that’s just more gifts he’ll have to get and the thought of that honestly excites him.
✮ Anything can happen but…reo with a daughter…guys….
✮ he would be the sweetest girl dad! would do everything in his power to make her believe she’s an actual princess and he’s just one of her loyal servants. Spoils her rotten and doesn’t feel bad about it.
✮ You’d have to explain to him how this could negatively affect your daughter and it would break his heart. He’d go into theatrics trying to refute it because “What do you mean I can’t let her have everything she wants?” and “What if she cries? You want me to make my daughter cry?” he gets it eventually, but remains reluctant lol.
✮ He’d love playing sports with his kids. Would try to get them into soccer but if they end up liking another sport he’s still just as hype. Isn’t initially familiar with the concept of letting the kids win but soon realized he has to level with the speed of their little legs.
✮ I don’t have any specific hc’s for him as a boy dad but he’d be just as great of course - he’d make sure his son sees how women should be treated based on how he treats you!
✮ If he could find a way to make you the total world ruler he would because he truly believes you’re the most capable person. He’s the kind of husband who lets you run things for the most part but is always there to step in when you need a break or if you just want him by your side. Would call for an emergency flight back home from whatever country he’s training in just because you said you didn’t wanna go to parent teacher night alone.
✮ He loves doing mundane tasks with you, but always tries to “make it a bit more fun” as he says - which basically means he puts away the clothes you fold while you listen to him crack really bad jokes at you, gossip about his teammates, or try to sing and serenade you with his MANY playlists he’s made dedicated to you. On days you both have nothing going on he follows you around the house like a lost puppy, which is slightly annoying but it also means you have four hands to do stuff because he’s a participator above all else.
✮ Reo always makes sure to show his appreciation for how hard you work whether it’s at your job, taking care of the kids/house, or both. He takes time alone with you very seriously, even as your lives get busier and your family grows he always makes sure there’s time for the two of you to just be together and be in love. Always jokes about how you guys need to keep the romance going. He has small romantic gestures that he indulges you in throughout the day: kissing you on the cheek, brushing your hair out of your face/tying it back for you if you if you need (taking his hair tie out for you to use), hugging you a little tighter just before you get up, running a bath for the both of you, massaging your shoulders while you talk.
to be fully honest with you guys, i have never in my life wanted to have kids so it was a bit hard for me to imagine what being happy with children would be like LMAO but alas i did my best. stay safe and stay cool. - aria :3
#blue lock#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#blue lock headcanons#blue lock fanfiction#bllk imagines#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#bllk fluff#mikage reo x reader#reo mikage x reader#mikage reo#bllk reo#reo mikage#blue lock reo#reo x reader#mikage reo x you#reo mikage fluff#blue lock fluff#⟡ ⠀ individual training
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— Revenge Sex
🏵️ — synopsis. James cheated. Remus is pissed off with some of James’s recent decisions. To get back at James (and because he likes you), Remus has sex with you.
🏵️ — warnings. Badly written smut. Weird plot. Pet names (pretty girl, darling). James is an absolute douche in this.
🏵️ — author’s note. I AM DOGSHIT AT WRITING SMUT. Wrote this on a whim. God bless. Hope this is okay.
It had been twelve days since you last saw James with his lips locked to some Huffleslut.
Twelve days of incessant badgering, pleading, apologies, and words words words. All in-person, all irritating.
Of course, today was no different. It had started with James ambushed you by slinging his arm over your shoulder when you stepped out of your house entrance. You shoved him away and kept walking with your friends to the Great Hall.
“Y/n! Wait up!” James called. You groaned in annoyance and walked faster with determination. He was the one that cheated! Why did he continue to follow you around?
His hand closed on your shoulder and he bent over to catch his breath. “Y/n, please just listen to what I have to say-“
You whipped around, anger evident in your eyes. “No, James Fleamont Potter. You listen to me. You cheated, not me. Clearly I wasn’t a good girlfriend and wanted to throw away a relationship for someone who just wanted to sleep with the popular guy. I don’t care. And before you start that ‘Oh! But y/n, I love you!’” You upped the pitch of your voice and brought your hands up. “That’s obviously a lie. If you loved me, you wouldn’t have even considered looking at that no-good, yellow-wearing, dirty rotten Hufflepuff slut! So just leave me the fuck alone!” You took a step back, pleasantly surprised when James didn’t move. “Thank you.”
You felt bad for not feeling guilty, but… you didn’t cheat. He did.
— 🏵️
“Hi. Don’t get up. Please.”
You looked up. In front of you stood the infamous Remus Lupin. Confusion painted your face: what on Earth could he possibly want? “I… okay? What do you want?”
Remus sighed and scratched his head. His face screwed up in pain from reach up for his head. You knew why. After two and a half years of dating someone, you get to know their friends well. Honestly, Remus was probably one of the best friends you’d ever had. You both got along well and he wasn’t two faced. “This is gonna sound really weird, but… I want to get back at James.”
You pressed your tongue to the roof of your mouth and nodded. Pulling it back with a ‘click’, you tilted your head. “Why are you telling me this, Remus? I want nothing to do with him.”
“That’s the thing,” Remus went on. “He’s been a real prick lately to everyone and has been lashing out. Saying things, doing things. I’m tired of it, Sirius is tired of it- Merlin, Peter barely talks to us anymore since James… y’know…”
“So… you want me to…?”
“Sleep with me.”
Your mouth dropped open. Your face went slack and you stared at the man in front of you. There wasn’t anything that would make you not want to sleep with him. He was actually extremely good looking. Girls complained abut the scars, but you thought they suited him, made him stand out, and give him that ‘don’t mess with me’ energy. “Uh.” Blubbering like an idiot in front of James’s hot friend wasn’t a very comforting thought.
“You can say no. I understand why you wouldn’t,” Remus shrugged. “I wanted to really lay it on him and stuff but if you don’t want-“
“Fuck yes,” your muttered. “Sure. Anything. I don’t care.”
Swallowing, Remus examined you closely. “Really? I don’t want you to feel pressure or anything.”
“Remus, I want to. Now that you mention it, I kinda want to get some revenge on Potter,” you trailed off. “What better revenge then with his best looking mate?”
Remus scoffed. “‘Best looking’ is far fetched, but I’ll take it. When do you want to…?”
“Does now work?”
A small laugh escaped Remus’s laugh at your coy expression. Your head was tilted dangerously and the corner of your lip was raised just so. Remus would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of you in un-platonic ways while you were dating James, but wouldn’t dare saying anything. Now that James went and fucked up, what better way to get James back and indulge himself in you then now? “My dorm or yours?”
You accepted Remus’s outstretched hand and stepped closer to him. Hand pressing into the soft fabric of his shirt. “Might not make it to a dorm,” you mused, letting your hand trail down. “Mine. Girls like to gossip. Guarantee that Potter’ll hear the news before you even finish.”
Remus’s jaw twitched at your touch, feeling his muscles flutter under your hand. “Lead the way,” he rasped, hand wrapping around yours.
—🏵️
Remus barely had time to close the door before you pulled his face down to yours, capturing his lips with yours. You scrambled to unbutton his trousers as he fumbled to undo your bra clasp. When both items were gone and your shirts were shed, Remus picked you up and let your hands grab his face as he made his way to the delightfully large bed. Perks of being a prefect, apparently.
You yelped when Remus dropped you on the bed. He turned his attention to your pants, pulling them off and tossing them away. He smiled at the wet patch on your cotton underwear. “Who turned you on that much, y/n?”
“You, you fucker,” you replied snarkily.
Remus’s brows quirked. “I am a fucker, aren’t I? ‘M gonna be fuckin’ a girl this pretty. Not something I’m embarrassed about,” he said. You would have replied if he hadn’t dropped to his knees and pulled you towards the edge of the bed like a feather. Remus rubbed a thumb from the top of your clothed cunt to the end of the stain of arousal in your underwear. You twitched. “Like that, pretty girl?”
“I was promised a fuck, Remus Lupin,” you complained, failing to hide the breathlessly and need in your voice. You can’t remember the last time James did more than buty his dick in you for more than three minutes.
Remus pressed featherlight kisses to the cloth covering your soaked cunt. “Don’t get snippy. You’ll get what you were promised,” he grumbled.
You ground your molars together to avoid sqealing when Remus pried away your underwear and drove his tongue into your pussy. With nothing but the bed to grasp, you threaded your hands into Remus’s hair. He groaned at the feeling and sent leg twitching vibrations through you. “Fuck Remus,” you spat.
The dickhead just hummed. He moved his hands so you were pressed down by his left arm. Remus’s right pointer finger came to tease the entrance of your pussy, his tongue tracing your clit. As anticipated, you jerked at the stimulation. Remus watched you body shudder as he slipped his finger inside you, taking care to memorize how you looked from this angle. His finger curled and you jerked, a ragged moan drawn from your lips.
Remus fingered you good, you thought through a clouded mind. His fingers where long enough to find where you needed him without much time, and he seemed more than ready to give you what you needed.
“So good, Remus,” you moaned out, back arching into his mouth. “Fuck! Right there Rem, please,” you pleaded mindlessly, eyes screwed shut. Remus slipped a second finger into you, chuckling lowly at your breathless gasp.
It wasn’t long before you came on Remus’s face. Your cunt fluttered around Remus’s fingers and your hands gripped his hair hard. You came with a loud moan that sounded better than Remus imagined. Your voice trailed off and your breath hitched as Remus let you ride out your orgasm, drinking everything you gave him.
When you laid slack on the bed, Remus pulled his fingers out of you with a lewd squelch. He licked them while you watched his lust filled eyes take in your naked form. “You taste amazing,” Remus said, pulling his cum soaked boxers off of his throbbing boner. “Can’t believe anyone would ever think of leaving you, pretty girl.”
Remus crawled on top of you, turning your head to press his lips to yours in an oddly intimate kiss. He tastes like you. “You ready for my dick, pretty? Or are you too tired?”
You scoffed at Remus’s last question. “Don’t insult me like that, Lupin,” you muttered. You wrapped a leg around his back and looked between the two of you. “Fuck me already.”
Remus adjusted his hips, hesitant to bury his aching cock into you- raw. “Do you want me to wear a condom?”
“I have potions,” you answered, bucking your hips, teasing the head of Remus’s cock. “Don’t make me beg.”
“I’d actually love to see you beg, pretty girl,” Remus mused, sinking down into your needy pussy. He dropped his forhead into your shoulder as you let out a strangled moan at the penetration. “You’re so tight, y/n,” Remus rasped. “Squeezin’ me like I was made for you.”
Your hands came to grip his shoulder, biting down your mewls. “Please Rem,” you begged, sucking bruises into his skin. “Please.”
Remus started moving his hips. He knew he wouldn’t last long but the way your chest shuddered and how tight you were squeezing him, you probably wouldn’t last long either. “So tight, darling,” he grunted, snapping his hips roughly into you.
Your mouth fell open as you wrapped your legs around his waist, doing anything to to be as close to him as possible. “I need it, Remmy, please,” you sobbed, bringing him down to swallow your screams with feverishly hot kisses.
Of course, Remus complied. The lewd sound of your cunt swallowing Remus’s cock mixed with the sounds of your mewls and muffled moans was a beautiful mixture of sounds Remus tried to commit to memory. You gripped him like a vice, digging your nails into his skin with each thrust. “That’s a good girl,” Remus grunted as his pelvis met yours. You shook under him, eyes searching his. “Takin’ everything I’m giving you… so good for me,” Remus babbled.
You nodded, pressing your nose into Remus’s skin- anything to be consumed by him. “Please, Remus, I’m gonna cum. I need to cum, I need-“
“I know, pretty girl. I know. Cum around my cock, yeah? Be a good girl for me and cum,” he growled, burying himself deep inside you. You came with a loud moan, burying your sobbing face into Remus’s shoulder. His hot seed flooded your pussy, filling you with him. You whimpered and tightened your legs around him.
“Holy Merlin,” you whispered, thighs twitching as cum ran down your thighs.
“Remus is fine,” the lycanthrope replied wittily.
Your chuckled and let your head fall back on the bed as you caught your breath. “Shut up and take care of me,” you chuckled. “Please.”
Remus’s eyes softened. “Since you asked so nicely.”
bonus: James’s Reaction
#female reader#jules writes 📓🖊#x female reader#remus lupin fic#remus lupin angst#remus lupin imagine#remus lupin fluff#remus lupin blurb#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin fanart#hp marauders#remus lupin x you#remus lupin fanfiction#the marauders#marauders era#remus lupin smut#remus lupin#marauders#james potter#remus john lupin#remus smut#remus x reader#remus x y/n#remus x you
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Dissecting the post-Sunday conversation between Ratio and Aventurine
This conversation is not, as many are interpreting, proof of Dr. Ratio's loyalty.
It couldn't be: they are still in the dreamscape, where the Family's eyes and ears are everywhere. No, this is a post-mission debrief, heavily encoded and disguised as a quarrel.
Dr. Ratio: You look pale. Or, is that also part of your act? Aventurine: Didn't think you'd have the nerve to show yourself. Dr. Ratio: I thought this was exactly what you wanted. After all, I faithfully fulfilled my duties as you instructed. Dr. Ratio: Just tell me if you can't hold on any longer. Aventurine: So, the "genius" of the Council of Mundanites wants to be my undertaker now? My… what an honor.
First part of the convo. Aventurine is playing his part perfectly. He’s acting angry and hurt: Ratio you rotten betrayer.
Interestingly, Ratio is slipping. Are you ok? Tell me if you can’t hold on. It almost sounds like he's a bit unsure about what happened. "I thought this was what you wanted", like he's asking for reassurance in some form.
Aventurine has to work hard to drag Ratio back on-script. "Have you forgotten, Doctor? You betrayed me." It's a hint and a reminder: stick with the plan, Doctor!
Dr. Ratio: Yes, and I'm pretty sure the people at the Strategic Investment Department would love to be notified of your death in due time, but let's not forget you won't be seeing them, because I'm the manager of this task. Aventurine: Great, then tell your people that Aventurine is ready to go in seventeen system hours.
Ratio asks for instructions (disguised as a taunt), and Aventurine provides them. I'm not entirely sure what instructions were given. It seems to be What should I tell the IPC? / Here's what you tell them.
Aventurine: My conversation with Sunday convinced me that there's a traitor in The Family, and that they hold the secrets of Penacony… So, I took the opportunity to set everything in motion. Aventurine: I even managed to recover the gift money. Things haven't gone this smoothly since I walked through the doors of The Reverie… Now, I'm only one step away from victory. Let's just wait and see.
Confirms that everything is on track. I believe the line about the gift money is actually him confirming that he has the aventurine cornerstone.
Dr. Ratio: Sounds like a very elaborate way of saying that you failed. Aventurine: That's all I can say. Have you forgotten, Doctor? You betrayed me.
This sounds like a bit of a warning from Aventurine. Remember we can't say too much here.
Dr. Ratio: You've got a lot of nerve — how exactly do you plan on completing your task while you're hands are tied by The Harmony? [...] Dr. Ratio: That's true, but what's your plan? Did you conceal an Orbital Support beacon in that gift money bag?
This is interesting. Ratio doesn't know the full plan! I imagine he's tremendously on edge. He's fishing for info, again disguised as taunts, specifically info about how Aventurine is going to get himself out—but of course, Aventurine can't say it out loud, not in the dreamscape.
Ratio is at the breaking point.
Dr. Ratio: Fine. Here, take this. Open it when you're on your last legs. You'll thank me.
YES this is what I was waiting for, the moment when his whole voice changes! His usual tone is very much like giving-a-speech. He pronounces each word and syllable with precision, and clearly enunciating all the ending consonants.
Not here though. It's all grumbles. I think this might be the first time we're seeing cracks, and the personal Dr. Ratio is showing through instead of the public-speaking one.
Aventurine: You catch on pretty fast, Doctor.
He caught on that he was supposed to play along and not say anything that outright gives the plan away. (In my opinion he was pushing it a bit.)
I wonder if that's why he pulls the sudden disappearing act. He's slipping up, and/or bad at saying good-bye. Can't trust himself to get another word out. 🥺
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Hellooo :D Could I request a villain who suddenly realizes that hero was once a terrifying supervillain? (Maybe a situation lead to the reveal or something? It's up to you!!) If my request doesn't tickle ur fancy then feel free to ignore <33
The other villain cocked their head.
"Change that uniform all you want," they said, grinning as they kept squeezing the hero's throat. "But it will never change what you are inside."
The other villain leaned in and put all the pressure they could come up with on the hero's windpipe, going as far as using their entire body weight to crush the hero's throat. Thus, tears ran down the hero's cheeks as they tried to force some oxygen back into their lungs.
They grabbed the other villain's wrists as they struggled but there was no mercy in the other villain's eyes, there was no escape. It wasn't even a fruitful attempt at defense.
It burnt, everything burnt. It was an indescribable pain, something so horrible that they gave up immediately. The hero wanted this to be over; they couldn't fight back.
It was true that the hero had regenerative abilities to some degree. But the other villain had also poisoned them earlier.
So, all in all, the hero's day wasn't going great.
"You will always be that disgusting piece of shit you've always been. It doesn't matter how many people you save. It doesn't matter what you do. You are rotten to the core and I can't wait to see you die." They smiled callously but the hero knew their lights were gonna go out in a few seconds. At least that meant they wouldn't have to see that horrible smile anymore. "Yeah, that's right. Look at me when you die."
Both of them heard the hero's throat crack.
The pain was completely out of this world and although the hero couldn't tell what exactly was broken, they knew it couldn't be good.
The hero wished it would be over soon.
They were about to pass out but then, suddenly, someone grabbed the other villain and yanked them across the floor. The hero couldn't move. They lay there and wheezed but nothing changed. The pain was still there and it felt like an endless limbo of violence.
It was hard to imagine that they could make it home today.
Breathing hurt. Survival hurt. Deep down, they wished the other villain would have just killed them.
They were right about everything anyway.
Whatever the hero tried to do, deep down they knew they were a horrible person. Old sins weren't any less significant. They knew it was foolish to try to make up for all the damage they had caused, for all the evil things they had done.
They had thought to escape all of this one day but it followed them around like an evil shadow. They didn't deny that they deserved it but they could also barely tell if their heart could take all of this.
They were trying so hard to be good. God, they were trying.
Although the hero's vision was horribly bad, they were able to recognize their nemesis eventually.
Their nemesis who was kneeling in front of them. Their nemesis who had just saved them.
"Silly hero," the villain said. They moved some hair out of the hero's vision and touched their bruised throat with their fingertips. The hero flinched but they couldn't say anything. "Come here."
They sat down on the floor of the empty warehouse and pulled the hero into their lap.
"Let me see..." With their index finger, the villain pushed up the hero's chin which was painful enough for the hero's body to twitch and produce some sort of desperate sound. "Shh..."
The hero didn't dare to try speaking. Their throat wasn't even remotely close to starting to heal. It would probably take hours.
"You are pretty bold for attacking them on your own," the villain said softly. They raked through the hero's hair with their long fingers, holding eye contact relentlessly. The hero couldn't really think. Was it true that they couldn't have defeated them? Or had they just given up because the other villain's words had been too cruel?
"I-"
"Shh. Don't speak," the villain said. They took off their cape and blanketed the hero. Gently, the villain traced the hero's injured throat repeatedly.
It didn't even matter to the hero that it hurt. They needed the touch, they needed skin on theirs with kind intentions. They would have let the villain push their fingers into an open wound of theirs if their sweet words had accompanied them.
"I would've never guessed that your past could be...so complicated."
The hero didn't know what they had anticipated. After all, they had lied to the villain, hadn't they? The villain was surely not happy about that.
"You're better than the rest of them. Living proof that people really can change and learn." The hero closed their eyes and pressed their cheek against the villain's torso. Although those words were nice to hear, they knew it wasn't true. Not really. The villain just tried to make them feel better. "But it was foolish of you to go up against the other villain. We both can be grateful that I have some information on them that shouldn't be available to the public. But you? You're not that desperate to save people, are you? So desperate that you will attack with no plan?"
The villain's fingertips stopped on the hero's clavicle and the hero took their hand, too tired to even think about a response.
"I guess, you not being able to answer me does have its perks. You can't protest when I say that you're good at this. Better than anyone I have ever met," the villain said. The hero didn't know why. They didn't know why the villain was doing any of this. Saving them, talking to them, touching them.
The hero didn't know how on earth they deserved this.
"Forgive your younger self," the villain whispered. "Or this will have to become a regular thing."
Again, they touched the hero's throat. It was still soft but their skin and muscles were still too sensitive. The hero tried to pull away and groaned but they also knew this was a warning.
It dawned on them. The villain was toying with them, even if it was playful, even if it was gentle. They were toying with them.
"Promise me you will work on this. You need to be able to take care of yourself. Unfortunately, I can't always be your knight in shining armor."
For whatever reason, the hero simply nodded. It didn’t matter what the villain had planned for them or if they wanted to use the hero. If they wanted to manipulate them and turn them into a weapon.
All of it didn’t matter right now. It didn’t matter. The hero closed their eyes and allowed themselves to rest for just a minute with their cheek against the villain’s body and their head on the villain’s thigh.
#writing snippet#heroxvillain prompt#heroxvillain snippet#heroes and villains#hero#villain#hero x villain#heroxvillain#an answer for an ask#request
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⚣ Open Arms ♾️
⚣♾️ A/N → yall betta love my butt from dawn till dusk and kiss it from dusk till dawn. 25K WORDS?!?!?! EXCUSE ME?! Anyway, another request done! This was an anonymous one, though that I got from my previous account but never did. So, whoever sent this in, I hope you see and enjoy it! Gotta say, it definitely feels good getting these requests out of my inbox. Well, my screenshots, at least. I used this request as a continuation of a previous fic I did, which you can read here: ⚣ Forever 💛 You can read this as a standalone, but I recommend reading the previous part beforehand for context. ALSO HERE'S THE ANGST YALL WANT SO BAD FROM ME YOU FIENDS! NOW GET🤺 GET🤺 BACK I SAY🤺 WARNINGS: Mentions of Death | Angst/Comfort | Emotional Fluffy Vibes | TW: Neglectful Parenting | Implied smexy stuff but compared to what I write, it's literally nothing | ETC
⚣♾️ Summary → Conner couldn't let it go; wouldn't let it go. He was out there somewhere, lost and afraid. His instincts have never lied to him in the past, and he was certain they weren't starting now, no matter how much the Team thought he was holding on to lost hope. They made a promise to each other, and Conner planned on keeping that promise no matter what.
⚣♾️ Words → 25.6K
REBLOGS & replies are greatly appreciated, please! 💛
⚣ ENJOY ♾️
How long is forever?
By definition: it means ‘for all future time; for always.’ Another line says ‘lasting or permanent.’ That’s what it was supposed to mean by the books at least. When he promised he would stay forever, that’s what he was supposed to do. That’s what he should've done.
Guess not all promises were meant to be kept, and words were really just that, words. No power to them at all.
Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword, Conner wanted to meet that guy just to show him how wrong he was, possibly with an actual sword if he had his way, but, hopefully, that wouldn’t happen.
Hopefully.
It had been over a year since Y/N’s disappearance. A year since he up and blinked out of Conner’s life, his friend's lives, and so on. There wasn’t a day that the young superhero didn’t find himself dreaming or thinking about Y/N. He’d catch himself frequently getting lost in remembering the way his smile always put him in a good mood.
When he was happy, Conner was happy.
Truthfully, he felt as if everything that happened before he met the young super was less significant now. Everything that happened before the two met didn’t matter anymore. Only what happened then and in the future.
Not even the day when Dick, Wally, and Kal found him at Cadmus and set him free. Or when Batman and the Justice League set him and his new friends up with their own headquarters and stealth team. Not even the day when he finally seemed to have Superman’s acceptance and bond as a mentor and family figure.
Before Y/N, life was just that; life. Something where he got up every day, worked out or trained with the team, went to school, beat up bad guys, and then went home to do it again. All those were supposed to be exciting things, for him at least, since those were things he never had or would’ve gotten to experience had it not been for his ‘liberation.’
At the time, that could’ve meant something special to him. But then some new guy stumbled into his life and fucked everything up.
“Heard we’re supposed to be getting a new recruit,” Wally mentioned as he and Kal were currently sparring in the training circle.
“Yeah, me too, or at least I read about it. Saw his file on the Batcave and read over it. There wasn’t much detail in there besides a little bit of his background. He goes to that really prestigious boarding school in the Midwest and his family is one of the most elite and wealthiest families on the East Coast.” Robin said as he was typing away at the computer.
“Great. Another spoiled rotten rich kid on the team. Sounds awesome,” Artemis uttered while organizing her arrow pack.
“Hey, I’m not rotten!” The Boy Wonder responded, feigning offense.
“Ah, but you weren’t offended by the spoiled rich part. Point still stands then,” Artemis smirked.
“Why do we even need another person? It’s not like we’re lacking or anything.” Conner proclaimed, his arms crossed in his usual defiant manner as his face held not an ounce of joy on it.
“I don’t know, I think it’d be nice to have a new member as a part of the team. It’s always great to meet new people. And who knows, maybe they can help us be even better.” M’Gann spoke.
“So you think we’re bad and need improvement,” Conner responded with an accusatory tone.
“No, that’s not what I’m saying at all. I just don’t think it’s bad if we learn from other people.” She responded, though slightly more irritable than before.
Part of the reason why she had no problem when Conner proposed they split up and just remain friends/teammates was not having to deal with his mood swings and attitude all the time. Don’t get her wrong though, he was a great boyfriend, inside and outside. But, it was clear to her that she was not a high priority on Conner’s radar.
Superboy was still getting to know who he was and understanding his place in this world, and that came with understanding his emotions and how they responded to certain situations. As time passed, he realized his ‘feelings’ or what he thought were feelings for the Martian girl were nothing more than platonic.
A byproduct of his exposure to the outside world, and society’s definition of a ‘normal’ relationship, which usually consisted of a handsome, strong fella and a nice, pretty gal. He figured that was the role he had to take on. However, after some time, realizing how forced and unhappy he felt with the role he placed himself in, it created a wedge between the two superheroes, thus prompting them to end their relationship on good terms.
Conner had things he needed to work through, and M’Gann wanted someone who put her first before anything else.
“I agree with M’Gann. Meeting different people and learning from their stories is always a valuable lesson. You never know how they could impact you in the present and the future,” Kal commented after beating Wally in their match, the floor lighting up to announce the speedster’s defeat.
Conner only let out a displeased grunt in response before the sound of the Zeta Gateway activating caught his and everyone else’s attention.
Everyone was a little apprehensive about adding a new member to the Team in the beginning, even M’Gann and Kaldur despite their positive attitudes. They had a dynamic, a flow that worked for them, and they were all more or less living by the line of thinking that if something wasn’t broken, why try and fix it?
But, change was inevitable. And, this change may have been something they all could happily get used to, seeing how the recruit seemed to tame their hot-headed Kryptonian the moment he walked into the mission room.
Okay, not tame in a way like he was an animal, but more in the manner of calming down. It was no secret that everyone knew Superboy had a bit of a temper and given his biology and nature, Wally once made a joke that they all should bring hard hats to the Cave just in case Conner was in a bad mood and needed to punch something.
He didn’t find it amusing, but he also couldn’t deny the truth of it. It became something the Kryptonian sort of obsessed over and wanted to change about himself. Especially in front of the recruit who he couldn’t understand why for the life of him he cared so much about what they thought about him.
He didn’t even realize how much he was trying to show himself as a level-headed person in front of the new guy until M’Gann pulled him aside one day and asked why he was acting so weird.
He tried to deny it at first, claiming he wasn’t acting weird at all and M’Gann was reading too much into something that wasn’t there. As expected, the Martian didn’t let it go and decided to present evidence to back up her claim.
She brought up the first week Y/N spent at the Cave, and Conner didn’t necessarily come off as anxious, but everyone could tell he was nervous, which had them all puzzled. Before then, it was rare (try never) that any of them would see the Kryptonian nervous or anxious about something. And if he was, he’d usually mask it with anger or disdain.
Yet, after meeting the new hero on their team, something about all of that changed.
“I wonder what kind of abilities he has,” M’Gann wondered aloud, an excited look on her face as everyone stood by the entryway to the Zeta Gateway.
“There wasn’t anything recorded in the file on the Batcomputer. Maybe he’s another vigilante like Artemis and me.” Robin said.
“Hopefully, a better one than Bird Boy.” The snarky smirk the archer currently held was met with an unpleasant look from the Boy Wonder before their attention was redirected to the gateway, hearing the computer announcing their mentor's arrival.
Batman, Superman, and Flash came through one by one, while being followed by another individual none of them had recognized. The computer announced their name as a guest, which Robin figured was because he wasn’t fully registered into the Justice League systems yet.
He had a puzzling feeling about why Batman was being more secretive around this individual, seeing as he usually puts every single detail he can find on a person of interest into a file. Plus, he would always have things like registrations and paperwork taken care of before anything else was done.
Not to say it made him suspicious, but he was curious.
The others waited patiently while their superiors came into the mission room, followed by the individual who was carrying a small designer duffle bag. His clothes and look were simple, and he held a genuine and curious look in his eyes, tinged with a bit of uncertainty that Superboy managed to pick up as well from how hard he was staring and analyzing the boy from the moment he walked in. Though, if you asked him, he’d most definitely say he was not staring.
It wasn’t obvious, as the guy took whatever measures he could to hide it, but he could tell the young man came from wealth. It was a familiar aesthetic and look that the Kryptonian had come to learn by being friends with Boy Wonder and all, even if he wasn’t necessarily born into a rich family.
Plus, through certain missions and social events his ‘status’ would get him into, he’d had his fair share of interactions and hand-shaking with those who had more money than they would ever need. He’d begun to learn their various looks and covers. Most were unpleasant, hiding underneath a vain and inflated sense of superiority. Something he almost could relate to at one point, considering he used to believe his powers and abilities put him above everyone.
This guy was different, though. Conner couldn’t put his finger on it, but something about him was intriguing. Nobody he had ever met before made the young Kryptonian feel whatever that Earth saying was he’d heard M’Gann rambling about one time. Something about butterflies in the stomach.
Why one would even eat a butterfly was beyond him. Yet, the feeling she described was exactly what Conner was feeling in his stomach at the moment. His first immediate thought was that his stomach was broken and it took Zatanna, Artemis, and M’Gann explaining it with the help of Black Canary that a week and a half later he was nervous or scared.
“Hello, everyone. As I’m sure you’re already aware, we’ve decided to recruit a new addition to your team. His name is Y/N, and he’ll be staying here at the Cave for a few weeks while we get more details situated. Y/N, meet your new team.”
Everyone introduced themselves one by one to the recruit, and since Conner was on the end, he was the last one to be greeted which he now regretted. He started going over in his head how he should say ‘hi’, not wanting to come off too aggressive where he scared him, but also not wanting to sound like he was some weakling.
It took getting an elbow shoved into his side from Robin for him to notice everyone looking at him, including the reason for his distantness.
“Oh, uh… Sorry. Hello, I’m Boysuper.”
Everyone started laughing, including Superman and Flash, and Conner swore he saw a hint of a chuckle from Batman as well. It wasn’t until he thought back on his words and realized his mistake that he blushed embarrassingly. Though everyone found it funny, they were all more or less completely thrown off.
This behavior was completely out of character for Boysuper! If someone were writing a character analysis of him, they’d say this was completely unimaginable and not realistic at all. It wasn’t anything like him or something he would do.
Which is exactly what made it all the more shocking and funny.
Y/N, also tickled by the name mistake, gave him grace and just pretended it didn’t happen.
“Hi Superboy, nice to meet you.” His smile was something that clouded Conner's thoughts, focusing in on the innocence in his face and the twinkle in his eye as he looked back into the Kryptonian’s eyes.
For a fleeting moment, Superboy forgot everyone else was there as he reached his hand out to shake the others. As far as he knew, Kryptonians didn’t sweat, yet his palms felt hot and they felt damp. He was almost scared to touch the boy’s hand, thinking the man would find him gross and disgusting perspiring in his palm.
It didn’t happen, though. They shook hands, and Conner got a weird tingle up his arms that had him freaking out even more on the inside. But, the smile on Y/N’s face kept him rooted. Kept him from leaping off the ground like a spooked cat who’d just been electrocuted.
Despite his nervous feelings, seeing the beautiful face smiling at him made him feel happy on the inside. It was a nice feeling, a very welcomed feeling. Something he wanted to cherish and protect forever.
Wait, did he say beautiful?
At some point, Black Canary along with Superman helped explain to Superboy what he was feeling of desire and attraction, and that it was completely normal to have those feelings, no matter who they were aimed at.
Artemis was a little less careful and just stated the simple truth.
“You’ve got a crush lover-boy.”
Everyone chuckled and laughed at the statement and the somewhat irony behind the revelation.
That day, Y/N changed his perspective on the meaning and purpose of life. Before, he didn’t see the significance in the saying ‘You only live once.’ True, you do only live once, but if you live to do the same thing over and over each day, then what’s the point of living at all?
What was the point of getting to know things or wanting to improve and get better at something when we all had the same eventual fate, give or take how many years it took for it to come? What did life really mean if all it had was for you to wake up and do the same thing you did yesterday and the day before that?
It was one of the constant questions he had mulled over in his head since his liberation from Cadmus and being welcomed into the Team. His first and only purpose in life was to be a weapon. Now, besides doing good and saving the world now and then, he had the chance to do something meaningful with his life.
He just didn't know what meaningful was.
Until he met Y/N, who from the very moment they met had a way of bringing out the best in Conner and making him want to be a better person. It wasn't like the Kryptonian was a bad guy or anything. In fact, he was a great friend, teammate, and hero. But, there was something about the boy that just made him want to be a better version of himself.
Even despite the rocky start to their relationship.
"I'm telling you, there's something up with that kid. Batman said something about them needing to do 'more tests' and that he couldn't return back until they were sure he wouldn't be a liability," Conner spoke with his teammates in one of the library rooms in their base.
Conner had recently overheard a conversation between Y/N and Batman when he was going to try and 'confess' his feelings for him as his friends had encouraged him to do, even M'Gann. But, those plans were halted when he overheard the Dark Knight talking to the recruit about tests and making sure they wouldn't be bugged.
He mentioned something about the school Y/N was attending and how they also had to make sure his parents wouldn't be a liability or get caught in the crossfire. The biggest thing that caught the Kryptonian's attention was when Batman said he had to absolutely keep his full identity a secret from the rest of the team, especially from Conner himself.
And, no matter how sad and reluctant Y/N sounded when he agreed to Batman's instructions and feeling a strong urge to comfort him, he didn't waste a second before running back to his friends and telling them everything. After the Red Tornado ordeal with his siblings, he didn't want to take any chances, no matter how his heart felt.
Everyone seemed on the fence though when he first told them. They all had gotten along really well with Y/N during his first few days and didn't want to think the guy could be a threat to him. But, they'd all learned from their mistakes in the past, and so decided they needed more information before they proceeded with anything.
Dick had pointed out that there still wasn't much in Y/N's file that he could find besides his background. The only solid things he was able to find were about his parents and how they shared very similar views with Lex Luthor on supers. It wasn't enough for them to outright accuse him of being up to no good but it was something for them to look into.
The Boy Wonder suggested the best way to learn more about him was to spy on him, and despite how much it didn't feel right to Conner, he agreed to do it. They know confronting him directly wasn't the best strategy, especially if he was being told by Batman to not reveal anything to them. They needed to be covert.
That's what led them to this moment right now. Conner had just overheard another of Y/N's conversations, only this time he was talking to his parents. Everything seemed fine at first, despite the obvious fact that his parents had no clue their son was currently living in a cave with a bunch of teenage superheroes and vigilantes. The Kryptonian was ready to call it quits, already feeling guilty enough for listening in on such a private conversation until...
"Yeah, everything's great at the school. I'm having a lot of fun and have met some very interesting people. And, yes, Uncle Lex has been really nice to me. His tests have been effective so far and he's confident he'll reach a solution soon."
That confirmed everything the Kryptonian and the others needed to know. They were all convinced Y/N was a mole sent here to spy on them and the Justice League for Lex Luthor. They were going to bring it to Batman, but Dick once again pointed out the conversation Conner heard earlier between the Dark Knight and the recruit, and that he was probably already aware of everything and was investigating on his own.
But this was their team, and they were going to do whatever they could to protect it. So, they decided to set up a trap for the mole.
Dick created a fake mission while Wally, Artemis, and Zantanna went to recruit Y/N to come with them. They spun a fake story about the League being in danger and that they needed all hands on deck. Of course, Y/N was willing to help them. He didn't ask questions and just followed them to where they were supposed to meet up with the others.
They had to wait for a few minutes for everyone else to arrive. Y/N was sitting on the ground, waiting patiently and trying to make conversation with everyone. When they finally arrived, Dick began his 'fake' briefing.
He decided to trust them, but something still felt off. And he didn't know why, but the look Conner was giving him let him know he wasn't being given the full truth.
"Alright, team. We have a situation. The League has been compromised and we're the only ones who can save them."
"What's going on?" Y/N asked, confused.
"The League has been captured and is being held by Lex Luthor. We don't know what he's planning, we only know that they need our help," Dick explained, not even batting an eye at the ridiculousness of the situation he was describing.
"And, how do you know all this?" Y/N questioned, confused as to why Batman wasn't the one giving the briefing.
"Batman told us before he got captured. He managed to send us a signal before Luthor's goons cut him off. We're the only ones who can help," Artemis added.
"How do we know they're really in trouble?" Y/N inquired, looking at everyone and their lack of gear or weapons.
"We have to trust Batman," Wally answered, trying his best to act as natural as possible.
"I don't know, guys. Something doesn't feel right about this," Y/N muttered, trying to figure out what was happening.
"Y/N, we're the only ones who can save Batman, the Flash, and the others. We need you," M'Gann pleaded, placing her hand on his shoulder.
Y/N was hesitant, not sure if what they were saying was true. He thought back on his conversation with Batman and how he made him promise not to tell the team about him and his family until they had everything figured out. But, if he was really in danger...
"Okay. Let's go."
And that's how Y/N found himself tied to a tree in a random park near his boarding school. A convenient location, the others thinking it would trick a confession out of the mole. But, when Y/N instead was warning them that by bringing him there, they were putting not only him in danger, but themselves and the League.
They didn't believe him at first, thinking this was just the cover story he was using if he got caught. But, then Batman, Superman, and the Flash found the young team of heroes and vigilantes would soon realize their mistake.
"Tell us the truth, now! Why are you here?" Kaldur demanded.
"I'm telling you I don't know what you're talking about," Y/N insisted.
"How dumb do you think we are? We know you're working with Lex Luthor. Just admit it!" Artemis spat, annoyed that the boy was trying to lie to their faces.
"Yeah!" Wally added, throwing peanuts from his snack compartment at the boy's face.
"Seriously, KF?" Dick said.
"What? Maybe if he has a peanut allergy, this will make him fess up."
"I don't have a peanut allergy."
"Oh, well. Now, it's just for fun," Kid Flash said before throwing more at him.
"Okay, this is just getting ridiculous. We know you're working with Luthor. I overheard your little conversation with your parents about Uncle Lex's tests," Conner said, his tone carrying its usual hard edge, but not as much aggression as it would be for someone else.
"You were eavesdropping on me?"
"That's not important. What's important is you confessing what you're doing here. What are you trying to do? What's your mission?"
"I don't have a mission. I don't know what you're talking about and what you overheard, you heard out of context," Y/N stated, the last part aimed at Conner who looked away from his hurt gaze.
"Y/N, please," M'Gann pleaded.
"I'm telling you the truth. I'm not working for anybody, and even if I was, it wouldn't be with Lex Luthor of all people. But, we seriously need to leave. We're not too far from the school, and if he finds out I was here, with all of you out of all people, it's going to cause more trouble than ever."
"Alright, Zatanna. Truth spell him..."
"He's already telling the truth."
Everyone turned around to see Batman, Superman, and Flash approaching with not-very-pleased looks. Then again, when has Batman ever looked pleased?
"Then, why didn't you tell us?" Dick asked with an accusatory tone toward his mentor.
"Because we didn't want this to happen," Flash stated, looking over at Y/N and the mess their young protegees made.
"What, so you don't trust us all of a sudden?" Artemis accused.
"This had nothing to do with trust, it had everything to do with a delicate situation."
"What situation?" Wally asked.
"A delicate one," Batman reiterated.
"Y/N is being used by Lex Luthor," Superman began explaining.
"So, he's not a mole?" M'Gann asked.
"No, he's not a mole. He's actually the exact opposite. His family is a known affiliate of Lex Luthor, and he's been using their known distrust of Superman, myself, and the rest of the League as a way to perform experiments on him with the promise of removing his powers at the request of his parents. However, someone like Lex, we can be sure has other purposes for these experiments. Purposes he intends to use for his own advantage and as a means to target the League," Batman continued.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Conner questioned, feeling even more guilty while glancing back at the recruit who was currently rubbing his wrists, having been freed from his restraints by Superman.
"Because we didn't want you getting involved. Lex has eyes and ears everywhere, especially in that school, and if he were to discover our involvement, it could put Y/N and his family in danger," The older Kryptonian pointed out, while placing a reassuring hand on the younger male's shoulder, who held a slightly worried look at the mention of his parents being put in possible danger.
Despite his still guilty feelings, something in him felt he should have gone over to comfort the younger male. He along with the rest of his teammates apologized to Y/N for their distrust before making their way back to Mount Justice.
Since everything was out in the open, Batman gave Y/N the okay to share with the others everything about his background. And share he did. He told the entire story of how everything came to be.
His parents had always been more or less distrusting towards Superman, The Flash, Wonder Woman, etc., and saw their powers and abilities not as ways that could help protect regular people like themselves and others, but as a means to oppression. They felt the very thing that made them superheroes gave them an unfair advantage over others.
Kind of how other people saw their super wealthy status as an unfair advantage over people of a lower class but that's another discussion for another day.
So imagine their surprise when their very own son ended up manifesting his own powers early on in his childhood. It started with small things like enhanced durability and moving at inhuman speeds.
But then, when it turned into being able to fly and manipulating energies in his teenage years, his parents had had enough. They were afraid their son was going to become just like the superheroes they hated so much. And, they were afraid of what he could do if his powers became too out of control.
So, they did the only thing they could think of.
They turned to Lex Luthor for help.
They told him about their situation and how they were desperate for help. They didn't want their son to be a danger to himself or others. Lex promised them he'd do everything he could to help their son and to try and remove his abilities.
The wealthy elite suggested sending him to one of the prestigious boarding schools that he funded. It was a school that catered to kids with extraordinary talents and abilities. They would provide him with an excellent education and would have the best teachers and professors teach him.
As a bonus, they were very confidential and private with their students and wouldn't share any information without explicit consent. That meant even if his parents were to come by and ask, they wouldn't be able to say anything, thus keeping their son's secret abilities safe.
However, they were none the wiser to Lex's true intentions. With these experiments, he'd finally have the advantage he needed to rid the world of Superman and the Justice League. But, of course, things wouldn't be that easy.
But, when Batman, Superman, and Flash came to his school in their civilian identities but still in disguise, they offered him the chance to truly understand and control his powers along with a spot to join their team of young superheroes as a new recruit. They also promised to find a way to end these experiments with Lex as Y/N explained that he hadn't met success with getting rid of them, but he did suspect he was up to no good, he just didn't know what to do as he knew his parents wouldn't listen to him.
It's why Batman also initially told him not to tell his new teammates anything about himself, at least until they found a way where Y/N could work and be protected from the experiments without putting his family at risk. Lex was known to be crafty and wouldn't hesitate to use the young teenager's parents as leverage to force him to comply
"Of course, I want to use my powers for good and help people. It's why I came with Batman and the others in the first place. But, not if it means I could put my parents in danger. Yeah, we have our differences, and they're not the most accepting of my abilities. But, they're still my family and I don't want anything bad to happen to them."
The others all felt for the young man and apologized again for their mistrust and promised to do whatever they could to help him out. They were a team after all, and a team sticks together through thick and thin.
Conner, on the other hand, still felt guilty for accusing him and even considering he was a mole. Y/N, however, was more understanding and forgiving than the Kryptonian thought he deserved.
"Ah, don't be too hard on yourself, Conner. If I were you, I would have probably done the same thing."
"Really? You don't hate me?"
"Why would I hate you? Sure, you accused me of being a spy for a supervillain, but it was only because you wanted to protect your team and the League. How can I hate you for that?"
Conner had been stunned by the younger male's response. He wasn't mad at him or even holding a grudge. He wasn't even holding the peanut incident against him. He was just so understanding. The Kryptonian knew if the situation were reversed, Y/N would be considered lucky if he hadn't blown up at him.
It was then Conner realized that maybe he felt something more for the young man than just a simple crush.
He thought about how much he admired how positive and enduring Y/N was, despite the challenges he was overcoming. His parents not accepting him, being used as a pawn to hurt others, and the same people meant to protect and love him allowing it, despite them being ignorant to it. But, the younger male still held onto hope and wanted to use his powers for good. He saw the best in people and wanted to help them, no matter what.
Y/N had this infectious energy about him. He always did everything with a smile and a positive attitude, no matter how much his life proved to be the opposite of positive. Yeah, he was a bit naive, but despite all that, and all of the things he'd been subjected to, he was innocent and pure.
He was like an angel, a light shining in a sea of darkness. And, Conner wanted to be the person that light shined on. The Kryptonian wanted to protect and cherish him. He wanted to hold him in his arms and never let go. He wanted to love him.
And, Y/N wanted to love him back.
He didn't care that Conner's temper was a bit short or that he could be a bit stubborn and aggressive. He understood he was just a boy raised to be a weapon. He had been taught to view the world in a certain way, and it was only now that he was learning there was more to life than that.
He understood that despite his gruffness, it was just the way Conner had learned to live, and that deep down he was a very loving and caring person.
Of course, their eventual getting together was nothing like anyone had expected, despite them waiting for the two idiots to confess their obvious feelings for each other.
It had been about a month since the incident with the fake mission and the eventual truth about Y/N being revealed to the team. After returning to Mount Justice and going over some logistics with the rest of the Justice League, they all got a debriefing from Batman on what would happen from there.
They knew that they couldn't risk keeping him away too long, otherwise, Lex would get suspicious and alert his parents. So, Y/N would go back to school as per usual, but he'd be under the surveillance of a team of League members disguised as his teachers and other staff. They would keep an eye on him and Lex Luthor's experiments and if they became too much, they'd intervene.
Conner, however, was not happy about this arrangement. He wanted to be the one who would look out for the younger male, but the Dark Knight had other plans.
"I can't allow you to do that. If we have you constantly watching over him, it'll be too obvious. He'll be under constant surveillance and have League members watching over him at all times. You'll be too obvious, Conner."
"Then, I'll just go back with him. I can stay in the school, and watch over him. I won't leave his side."
"Conner, the school isn't equipped for a teenage boy with Kryptonian abilities. We can't allow you to be there with him. If you go, it'll just put him in more danger." Superman said, attempting to reason with him.
"But, what if he gets hurt? What if Luthor does something? What if..."
"Conner, please. I'm going to be fine. You heard what Batman and the others said. They're going to be right there with me and won't let anything happen. They'll protect me." Y/N said, placing a hand on the younger Krypontian's arm to reassure him.
"Besides, we've worked out a way to disrupt Lex's experiments. With the help of our scientists at S.T.A.R. Labs, we've created a dilution solution. Whatever Lex decides to inject him with, these solutions will work to nullify them. It'll give us more time to figure out a way to end these experiments for good and won't pose any risk to Y/N's powers." Batman explained.
Conner wasn’t happy with the idea, not one bit. But he knew he had no choice but to let Y/N go with it, no matter how much he hated it.
"Of course, he'll still be a part of this team. We're setting up a new Zeta Gateway near the school, and one of our agents will make sure he gets there safely and without alerting Lex. Y/N will come here after his classes and sessions with Lex to report anything new as well as keep his training up."
With that, Black Canary and Captain Marvel came forward with a box, handing it over to Y/N with a smile. The young man opened it excitedly to find a brand new super-suit, specially made and tailored for him.
"Welcome to the Team, Primus."
The other members congratulated him with cheers, hugs, and claps, a little bit more enthusiastically than they would have with someone else, but it was deserved. He'd already shown to be an amazing member of the team and an amazing friend, and they were happy to have him.
They celebrated later that day on the beach, before Y/N's eventual departure. Batman made it seem as if he was on a vacation with his parents while he was here at Mount Justice, so he knew he'd have to return eventually to prevent any eyes from getting raised.
Everyone was having fun, playing, swimming, and laughing. At some point, they all ended up lounging around on the sand, laying or sitting on their various blankets and chairs while watching the sun slowly descend towards the horizon, signaling the closer approach of Y/N's leaving.
"I have a question," Y/N suddenly said, "I had meant to ask this before after everything that happened last month but kept forgetting. When Batman told me to keep my background a secret from you all, he specifically kept telling me to not tell Conner about my connection to Lex. Why?"
Everyone looked around at each other, before settling their gaze on Conner, who looked down at the ground with his eyebrows furrowed.
"Well, it's a bit of a long story," Dick began, not wanting the boy to feel awkward with his question.
"I'm Superman's clone," Conner interrupted, silencing not just the Boy Wonder but everyone around him as he continued, "I was made in a lab from the DNA of both Superman and Lex Luthor to be a weapon against the Justice League. I'm not an actual person, and if it wasn't for these guys, I'd still be in Cadmus, probably sitting in a pod right now."
Y/N seemed taken aback, not saying anything as Conner continued to look down at the sand in shame. He was afraid of revealing the truth to Y/N, thinking he wouldn't see him as an actual person.
However, he, along with everyone else, was more than shocked at his response.
"Wow, you are a miracle to all the gays around the world."
There was a beat of silence before a chorus of laughter erupted around them. Wally, Artemis, and Dick did nothing to hide their hysteria while Zatanna and Kaldur attempted to conceal their own chuckles. M'Gann and Conner were both confused, but the Martian laughed as well, while the Kryptonian was just looking at the younger male in front of him, his cheeks turning red.
"I-I don't know what that means."
"Let's just say I know some people who kill to have someone like you in their lives. You're more special than you know," Y/N answered, smiling at him.
Conner was shocked, not expecting that response.
"You don't think less of me?"
"Of course not. Why would I?"
"Because of what I am. What I was made for and who I was made from."
"I don't care about any of that. You're you, and you're the one that makes you, you. Not what other people made you to be if that makes sense," Y/N said with a humorous, confused look that Conner couldn't help but smile at," You're a person, Conner, and I think you're amazing," Y/N looked at the Kryptonian with a smile who had the blush on his face returning even more.
"Thank you."
"Hey, guys. The sun is going down. We should take a picture," Dick suddenly said, pointing out the setting sun.
They all gathered around for a group photo, Y/N and Conner being the closest, with the younger male leaning into the Kryptonian. It was a great moment for all of them, and the perfect way to start their journey as a team.
Eventually, the sun had set and it was time for Y/N to make his departure. He made his goodbyes to everyone, promising he would be back soon before eventually stopping in front of Conner who nervously looked down at the boy, his emotions still all over the place from their previous conversation.
"Can I actually talk to you in private before you go?" The Kryptonian asked.
Y/N looked a little shocked and turned to Batman who gave his nod of approval, "You've got five minutes."
The two boys walked a bit away from the group, the others looking on with eager faces and eyes as they not so subtly tried to see what was happening.
"Um, I just wanted to apologize again for everything that happened. I know it was stupid, but I didn't want anything bad to happen to the Team or the League. And, I thought if there was a chance you could be a mole or something, I needed to find out. But, I realized that it was stupid, and I was just being paranoid..."
Without even realizing it, Conner began to ramble and Y/N had to take his hand to get him to stop talking, "Conner, it's okay. I told you, I already forgave you for that. And, remember, I was the one who said you were justified in doing it. You were trying to protect your team and that's something I respect and admire."
"You do?" Conner asked, feeling a bit hopeful.
"Of course, I do. You were willing to do anything to protect the people you care about, and that's admirable. I could never hold that against you. My own parents don't trust me just because I have powers and sent me away to a boarding school to be experimented on in hopes of getting rid of them. You only reacted the way you did because you were worried about the people you cared about and loved. Something only a real person is capable of doing," Y/N said.
Conner didn't know what had come over him, but the feeling of Y/N's hands in his own and the sincerity of his words had him pulling the younger male in for a deep kiss, his lips fitting perfectly against his own.
Y/N was surprised, but after a moment, he wrapped his arms around Conner's neck and deepened the kiss, not even realizing the shocked expressions of the people around them.
"It's about time," Artemis muttered.
Y/N had left back to his school and sessions with Lex and returned to Mount Justice within a month where he'd reported everything that had happened. The dilutions were working for the most part and Lex was none the wiser from what he could tell.
And once the Zeta Gateway was set up, Y/N was able to return every other night or when he was needed for a mission. It gave him the time he needed with the Black Canary and the other League members to test and train his powers.
Conner, on the other hand, had a new drive. He was less of the brooding and angry teen he used to be and was a lot more caring and less abrupt and aggressive. Y/N had made him want to do better, to be better than he was before.
And with their new relationship, Conner was more determined than ever to protect Y/N and keep him safe, no matter what. As far as the Kryptonian was concerned, no one would be allowed to hurt him. Not Lex Luthor, not his parents, no one.
Their relationship developed and deepened very quickly during their time together with the two becoming nearly inseparable. When Y/N would come to the Cave, Conner would frequently join in on his training sessions with Black Canary, and he would realize how fast of a learner his boyfriend was.
Within a couple of months, he was able to adapt and adjust to his powers, growing more confident and powerful. He was even able to keep up with the Kryptonian's own speed and strength, something that impressed the others.
"I can't believe how much he's improved in such a short amount of time," Dick said.
"Yeah, he's been doing well. I've never seen anyone adapt to their powers so quickly," Wally added.
"Yeah, well. With the right motivation, I think anyone can do anything," Kaldur said, watching the two lovers spar with each other while shirtless from across the room.
"Yeah, I bet," Artemis said, watching the two as well.
"Conner's become really protective of him," M'Gann said.
"Yeah, well. When you're dating a guy with superpowers by someone who's kind of your arch-nemesis, you tend to get a bit protective," Dick pointed out.
"You think we should do something about it?" Wally asked.
"What do you mean?" M'Gann questioned.
"I don't know. It just seems like Conner's gotten a bit more possessive than usual. I mean, Y/N can't even go to school without him worrying. And, he's always asking about him and his progress with his powers. It's like he's obsessed or something."
"Well, it's not like he's done anything wrong," Zatanna pointed out, "We don't even know what's going to happen with his parents and Luthor. I mean, imagine how Conner must feel when Y/N has to go back to the school and those experiments and he can't do anything about it."
"Plus, the fact his family is essentially allowing this, whether they know about the full situation or not," Kaldur added.
"Yeah. I mean, the guy was practically raised in a lab and was used as a weapon by that same jerk. So, the idea of his boyfriend's family being involved with his arch-nemesis would definitely get his panties in a twist," Artemis added
"Well, hopefully, we can figure something out soon. I'm not sure how much longer Conner can handle it."
"I think we should just let things play out. If it gets to a point where it's affecting our missions or our teamwork, then we can intervene. But, for now, I think we should just let them be," Kaldur said, ending the conversation.
As if on cue, the two boys finished their sparring match, with Y/N pinning Conner down against the floor.
"I win," Y/N said with a smile.
"Only because I let you," Conner replied.
"No, you didn't. You just couldn't handle me. I'm just too fast and strong for you," Y/N teased before letting them both up.
"Oh, yeah? Well, let's see who's too fast and strong now," Conner said before grabbing Y/N and throwing him over his shoulder.
The Kryptonian carried him around the room, his boyfriend laughing and protesting while the others just rolled their eyes.
"Alright lovebirds, that's enough flirting. We've got a mission," Dick said.
"Yes Father," Y/N replied sarcastically before having the Kryptonian put him down who had a disgruntled face at being interrupted, "Stop pouting, you big baby."
"I'm not pouting," Conner mumbled.
"You're totally pouting."
"I'm not."
"You are."
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"No."
"Yes."
"Haha! I win!" Y/N said before giving Conner a peck on the cheek, causing the Kryptonian to smile while his boyfriend checked his phone, "Oh Crap, I didn't realize how late it was. I have to get back to the school."
"Do you have to go?" Conner asked, his arms wrapping around his waist.
"You know I do. We don't want to alert anyone. I promise I'll be back later, okay?" Y/N said, cupping the Kryptonian's face.
Conner nodded before leaning down and capturing the younger male's lips in a sweet kiss.
"I'll see you later."
"Bye, babe."
"See you later, Y/N," The others called out as the young male made his way to the Zeta Gateway.
"Man, I don't know how he does it. If I had a boyfriend like Conner, I don't think I'd ever leave," Artemis said.
"Yeah, well. I think the only reason he's able to is because of the fact that he's being experimented on by his parents' best friend and his parents are okay with it. He wants to be there to protect his parents and keep them safe, despite what they're doing," Dick pointed out.
"I hope we can find a solution soon," Wally said, "I can't imagine what Conner's feeling."
"Yeah, we'll figure something out," Kaldur said, before they made their way to the mission briefing.
Things continued on like that for almost a little over a year. During the day, Y/N would attend his classes and sessions with Lex while still taking the dilutions S.T.A.R. Lab made for him. Then, at night, he traveled back to Mount Justice for training, any missions he was needed on, and to provide updates to the League while they worked on shutting the experiments for good.
He'd come far in his development and was no longer the helpless kid who had no control over his powers. He was now a superhero in his own right and had become a very important member of the team.
Plus, he and Conner were as close as could be, deeply in love with each other and always together. The Kryptonian was still a bit protective and possessive of the younger male, but not to the point where it was interfering with the team. If anything, it had the opposite effect.
When they were out in the field, Conner was more determined and focused than ever, especially if Y/N was involved.
He still went out of his way to make sure the younger male was safe, even taking on the responsibility of walking him back to his campus at night, in disguise of course. Batman objected to it at first, but knowing how stubborn Conner was, especially when it came to Y/N, he decided to allow it.
And that's where Y/N got to discover the jealous side of his boyfriend when they ran into his roommate one night the Kryptonian escorted him back.
"Hey, Y/N. Who's this?"
"Oh, this is CJ, my boyfriend. CJ, this is my roommate, Mason." Y/N said.
Conner gave his boyfriend a look at the fake name before turning back to the other present male, "Nice to meet you," he said, a bit more gruff than he intended.
"Same here. I'm glad to finally meet you, Y/N's told me a lot about you. Well, when he's here."
"I'm sure," Conner replied, trying not to sound as jealous as he was.
"Well, I'm gonna head back. I'll see you back in our room, Y/N" Mason said.
Conner did not like how suggestive that sounded and was glaring daggers into the retreating boy's back. He should have considered himself lucky that the Kryptonian didn't have heat vision, otherwise he'd be a pile of ash on the ground.
"You okay, babe?" Y/N asked, seeing his boyfriend's expression.
"I don't like him," Conner stated.
"Why? Because he's my roommate?"
"Yes. He's your roommate. And he's a guy. A guy who spends a lot of time around you. A guy who sleeps in the same room as you and knows you have a boyfriend. A guy who probably has a crush on you and is probably fantasizing about you being with him right now."
"Conner, you're being ridiculous," Y/N said, rolling his eyes.
"I am not. I know what guys like him are thinking about. He wants to get into your pants."
"So, what? Do you think I'm just going to let him? Or that I'm not capable of fending him off?"
"I know you can, but that doesn't mean he won't try. And, I don't like the idea of you being alone with him. You need to switch rooms."
"What? Just for me to end up in another room with another guy?"
"Doesn't this place offer single rooms?"
"Yes, but they're for seniors only."
"What about CO-ED?"
"I-... Really, Conner?"
"What kind of prestigious institution is this? Fine, you're moving into the Cave then, and you'll share my room with me. Your actual boyfriend."
"Conner, I can't..."
"Why not?"
"Because it's not safe. If I'm not here, my parents will get suspicious. What if they try and contact me, and I'm not here? They'll get worried and call Lex, and then he'll get suspicious. I can't risk it."
Conner sighed, knowing his boyfriend was right.
"Have I mentioned how much I don't like your parents?" Conner muttered.
"Yes, you have. Multiple times."
"Good."
That wouldn't be the last time Conner would suggest Y/N moving into the Cave, and no matter how much the younger male wanted to, he knew he had to stay at the school.
In their time together, Y/N had become one of the most, if not, the most important people in the Kryptonian's life. He was the light in the darkness, and Conner couldn't imagine his life without him.
However, the strain of the situation was beginning to show.
Lex had started to increase the intensity and frequency of the experiments, and Batman and the other League members weren't having much luck trying to figure out how to stop them. They weren't having much luck with Y/N's parents either, trying to subtly change their views on the League and Lex Luthor to help them see the potential mess they were creating by allowing these experiments to happen, but it was to no avail.
Conner could feel himself getting angrier and more impatient. He wanted to protect Y/N and help him in any way he could and was tired of not being able to do anything.
He'd also become frustrated with the League and his teammates. They were so focused on making sure they didn't make things worse that they were neglecting the actual problem.
When Y/N started slipping in training and showing signs of ill effects, Conner became even more worried and stressed every time the boy left back for school. Not being able to know if something happened to him while he was there was driving the boy up the wall, and as a result, he became more persistent in his efforts to get Y/N to stay in the Cave where he could protect him.
None of them were successful of course. But, things were slowly getting more out of control and dangerous, and Conner didn't know how much more he could take before he lost it.
"Y/N, keep up! Come on," Black Canary shouted as she ran the team through different training drills.
Batman and Superman were also there observing the training. They were there to discuss potential updates to the situation after meeting with the League, but they, especially the Kryptonian showed signs of worry at the younger superhero's seemingly exhausted state.
"He's been training a lot lately. Maybe he's just tired," M'Gann suggested.
"Maybe, but this is unusual. Even for him," Dick said.
"He's been a bit off lately," Artemis added.
"Maybe it's because of the experiments," Wally suggested.
"We don't know that," Kaldur said.
"Well, what else could it be? You saw how he was acting yesterday. He was exhausted, and his powers were all over the place. He's not getting any better. If anything, he's getting worse," Artemis said.
Her words kept everyone silent as none of them could deny the obvious fact sitting in front of them. It didn't help that Conner was already upset about the situation as a whole and the fact that the League had allowed it to go on as long as it did was only making his anger worse, something everyone could see.
"Alright, that's enough for today," Black Canary finally said.
"Are you sure? We still have some time left," Zatanna asked.
"We can finish up tomorrow. I think we all need a break. We've been working hard lately and need some time to ourselves. You can come down, Y/N!"
"I agree," Superman said, "You guys have been doing great. You deserve some time to yourselves."
"I'm going to go see if Y/N is alright," Conner said.
"Maybe we should let him rest for a bit, Conner," M'Gann said.
"What? Why? He's my boyfriend which makes him my concern. So, I'm going to see if he's alright."
"I think M'Gann is right, Conner. You should let him rest for a bit before you see him," Dick said.
"Is that an order?" Conner asked, his eyes narrowing.
"Conner, we're just saying that—"
"Oh my god!"
The Kryptonian was about to make a retort, but the sound of a scream stopped him. Everyone turned to see Y/N falling from the sky, his body limp.
"Y/N!"
Conner didn't waste a second and leaped off the ground towards his boyfriend. He caught him just in time before he hit the ground, his body hanging limply in his arms.
"Y/N! Y/N!" Conner said, shaking him, but the younger male didn't respond.
The Kryptonian's eyes were furious as he turned to the League members who had rushed over, "This is all your fault!"
"Conner, calm down. We're going to figure this out," Batman said.
"No! All of this is your fault. You and the entire League! You all knew this was happening, and you let it continue. You didn't do anything to stop it, and now look at him!"
"Conner, please. I know you're upset, but you need to calm down. We need to figure out what's wrong with Y/N."
"What's wrong with him?! You guys have been using him as your little guinea pig for over a year and now that something's wrong, you're suddenly concerned? You're all a bunch of hypocrites!"
"Conner, please. Let's just get Y/N to the med bay and see what's wrong," M'Gann said.
"Fine!" The Kryptonian shouted before following the others towards the medical bay, his boyfriend still held tightly in his arms.
Y/N was placed on the bed, while the League and the Team watched as Red Tornado checked his vitals.
Batman sent out an emergency call and had some medical professionals from S.T.A.R. Labs come to Mount Justice to figure out what was going on. His diagnosis wasn't good.
"His vitals are improving, thankfully. But, it seems his body is under a lot of stress."
"What does that mean?"
"From initial tests, it seems that the combination of whatever he's being injected with combined with our solutions to dilute and nullify them are causing his immune system to feel like it's getting attacked from two ends."
"But, this wasn't happening before when Y/N started taking the dilutions?"
"Yes, because whatever serums Mr. Luthor was using weren't as strong. We can only assume he's gotten more persistent and amped up the intensity of his tests. Combined with our dilutions, now, not only are they fighting with each other, but it's causing his body to fight itself as well. We need further tests to confirm, but what I can say is that since these experiments are primarily designed to extract and/or remove his powers, his use of them in combat or training causes more stress than he can handle."
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that Y/N's body is rejecting the combination of both the serums and our solutions, and the only way to prevent further harm is to stop using them."
"But, that'll mean he won't have any way to counteract the effects of the serums," Superman said.
"Yes. But, it's the only way to prevent further damage. His body is essentially going into a sort of self-defense mode and is attacking itself. We need to stop it now before it gets worse and becomes permanent. Right now, it's only affecting his immune system, but if it continues, it'll affect other parts of his body, and we won't be able to save him."
The doctor unhooked him from the machines, packing his things before being escorted back to S.T.A.R. Labs by Black Canary and Captain Marvel. The room was quiet as Conner stood by Y/N's side while glaring at the Dark Knight.
"You knew this was happening, didn't you?"
"Conner, you need—"
"No! Don't tell me what I need to do. You knew this was happening, and you did nothing. You were fine with just sitting around and doing nothing, letting this happen. You let Y/N get hurt and put him in danger."
"Superboy! That's enough." Aqualad ordered.
"Dude, you think they've been sitting around doing nothing? That's all they've been doing trying to figure out how to shut this all down while dealing with other stuff. Batman even tried going to Y/N's parents directly to get them to see reason." Dick tried to argue on his mentor's behalf.
"And, look where that got us. Y/N nearly died today because of the crap you've all been subjecting him to. It's been over a year and you still haven't done anything. He's the one suffering while all of you get to just sit back and watch."
"Conner, please. We're trying. They just need more time," M'Gann pleaded.
"Time? Y/N could have died today. Do you understand that? I could have lost him. And, it would have been all of their faults."
"Conner, please. I know you're upset, but you can't blame them. They've been trying their best," Zatanna said.
"No, they haven't. If they were doing their best, they would've confronted Luthor directly and put an end to this shitshow months ago!"
"That would've just put Y/N and his family in more danger! They can't just go around accusing someone like Lex Luthor who is known to cover his tracks without any proof!" Artemis argued.
"Conner, enough. We all get how you feel, but they've done everything we can," Kaldur said.
"Really? Cause, from where I'm standing, they've done nothing, " He said before turning his heated gaze to Batman, who stayed silent during all of this, "You're all a bunch of cowards."
"Conner!" Superman yelled.
"No, fuck all of you. I'll save Y/N myself if I have to," He said, before picking Y/N's unconscious body off the bed and exiting the med bay towards his room.
"Should we stop him?" Wally asked.
"No, let him go," Batman answered, "He needs time to cool down."
"He's right though, isn't he?" Dick asked, "We've been putting this off for too long. We've been waiting for the League to handle this, but they haven't done anything."
"We've been trying," Superman said.
"And, yet, you haven't gotten anywhere. Despite his reaction, Conner's right. You've just been sitting around and waiting for something to happen. What have you done to stop this from happening?" Wally asked with a pointed look.
"We've been trying to find evidence against Luthor, but he's been hiding it well. We need to find a way to expose him and bring him down without risking Y/N and his parents. We can't afford to lose this."
"Well, let's hope something can get figured out soon because I don't think Conner can handle any more of this. None of us can," Kaldur said, the tone of his words hanging heavy in the air as he and the rest of the team made their way out of the med bay as well.
Y/N had woken up a couple of hours later, finding himself being held by a softly snoring Conner whose grip around him was so secure, you'd think the Kryptonian was guarding a treasure.
He smiled at the sight, not wanting to disturb his boyfriend, but the Kryptonian sensed his movement and woke up. The second he laid eyes on you, a softness appeared on his face as he brought a hand to caress Y/N's face who smiled back at him while leaning into his hand.
"Should I be worried about this being a regular thing?"
Conner didn't respond, but the slight smile across his lips indicated he was happy to see Y/N could still make a joke out of anything. The younger boy started to look around, wondering how he even got there in the first place.
"What happened? Last thing I remember was being in training, and then nothing else," He asked, turning back to the Kryptonian.
Conner still didn't say anything, just leaned over and pressed a kiss against the boy's lips, forcing him to lay back as he positioned himself over him. Y/N wasn't complaining at the move, kissing back with as much fever and passion as the Kryptonian.
When he broke the kiss apart, Conner just leaned his head down into his neck while being careful not to lay all his weight on the boy, placing small kisses on his neck and breathing in his scent. Y/N brought his arms around the boy, giving small caresses to his back, sensing the boy needed this quiet moment.
He could tell whatever happened wasn't good, and it would likely upset Conner in talking about it. That's when he suggested going to the common room to watch TV, having more time to cuddle, and just relax after what must have been a stressful day. Plus, based on the way he was acting now, Y/N knew his boyfriend wasn't planning on letting him out of his sight for the rest of the night.
Without a word, Conner hopped up off the bed, picking his boyfriend up in his arms, and carrying him out of the room.
"You know, my legs work just fine. Just thought I should remind you," Y/N joked, finally getting a smile from the Kryptonian.
"Shut up and let me take care of you idiot."
"Whatever you say, honey."
"I hate that nickname."
Eventually, Y/N discovered what happened, after he practically had to force Conner to give him his phone which he needed to get back to his dorm and the Kryptonian all but exploded on him for even considering the idea of going back to that place. He knew the experiments were getting worse, and he could feel the effect it was having on his body.
The only thing he didn't realize was how much of an effect it was having on Conner and even his friends who all were concerned for his well being after watching him nearly split open his skull after fainting mid-flight and plummeting towards the ground. But, in the end, all he could think of was his parents and not putting them in danger.
It didn't matter though, because the Kryptonian had made his decision, and he made it clear not only to his boyfriend but to the rest of the team and their superiors. Either he goes with Y/N back to the school and stays with him full-time, or Y/N would remain at Mount Justice and transfer to Happy Harbor and they would just have to figure out another plan to protect his parents.
Surprisingly, he wasn't met with any opposition. Everyone agreed with him. While the League was still concerned about the potential consequences of these actions and the dangers they could bring, they realized their hesitance had already put Y/N in a more than dangerous position that could have cost him his life.
While the League still had a plan in motion and would be monitoring the situation, they knew things had escalated beyond their control. They decided to follow Conner's suggestion, having the Kryptonian pose as a transfer student, allowing him to attend the school and stay by his boyfriend's side.
He was moved into his own dorm with a roommate (despite his initial demands that he be placed in the same room as Y/N, but there was only so much they could do without raising heads) and placed in all his classes. Conner became like his personal bodyguard, making sure he was never alone or in the presence of anyone they didn't know or trust.
He was unpleasantly surprised to find out it was an all-boys school, and it only made the Kryptonian even more suspicious of his classmates, especially the ones who seemed too friendly or close to his boyfriend.
Y/N was not amused.
"Conner, please, stop glaring at everyone."
"I'm not glaring. I'm just observing."
"Observing, glaring. Same difference."
"What? They're all just staring at you. Like, they're undressing you with their eyes. It's disgusting. And you should've told me this was an all-boys school!"
"I didn't tell you because I didn't think it mattered. Plus, I knew you would react this way. Besides, they're not undressing me with their eyes."
"Just because you don't see it, doesn't mean they're not doing it. And what do you mean you knew I'd react this way?"
"Conner, sweetie, I love you, but you've got to be one of the most jealous people I've ever met."
"Okay, you're exaggerating. I don't get that jealous." Conner scoffed.
"Babe, you literally get upset because Wolf always wants to play with me more than he does with you."
"Okay, that's completely valid. I'm his owner or Alpha or whatever, but he only wags his tail excitedly when he sees or smells you coming."
"I've always been a dog person." Y/N shrugged.
"Yeah, well apparently, you're also gonna be the person who gets all these irritating fuckers sent to the nurse's office if they don't find somewhere else to look at."
Y/N rolled his eyes in amusement, "You're ridiculous."
"I'm your boyfriend."
"Exactly."
The Kryptonian couldn't argue with that, not that he would want to.
"I'm still not going to like this," Conner grumbled.
"Yeah, I know. And, I still love you."
"Good."
Looking on the brighter side, however, things were better with Conner attending the school. He was able to provide updates to the Team and League about what was happening, and the Kryptonian was always on high alert when Y/N was at the labs.
Plus, it was nice having the Kryptonian nearby. The fact that his boyfriend was always so close made Y/N feel safer and less stressed, and it gave the Kryptonian peace of mind knowing he was safe.
Of course, there were moments when Conner had to remind himself not to overreact, trying to control the situation, but he was getting better at it.
Ironically enough, Conner ended up becoming a little popular within the school, which should have been surprising. The Kryptonian was the picture-perfect American boy. He was athletic even if he didn't join any sports teams, most people just assumed from his muscular build. He possessed high intelligence thanks to his G-Gnome programming and was insanely attractive in the eyes of many.
Even though he wasn't exactly the most social, choosing to mostly keep to himself or stick by his boyfriend's side, many of the students and teachers slowly began to warm up to him. He was still a bit standoffish and awkward, but his protective nature towards his boyfriend was seen as endearing and adorable by his peers.
It was also envied and desired by many of their classmates. And since Conner was still convinced that certain boys in the school couldn't be trusted because of their obvious love-struck eyes for Y/N, it made him all the more surprised when he realized some of those looks were meant for himself. Much to the displeasure of his boyfriend, of course, which the Kryptonian took great pride in. It was satisfying knowing he wasn't the only jealous one in their relationship.
"You're jealous," The Kryptonian smirked at his boyfriend's irritable expression as they sat in the library studying.
"Am not," Y/N denied.
"Are too."
"And what makes you think that?" Y/N tried to show a neutral face, but Conner knew him too well and could see the visible anger twitching in his eyes.
"Well, for starters, you get this irritable look in your eye like the one you have now when someone tries to come up and talk to me. You looked about ready to blast my lab partner's head off in chemistry earlier today during our experiment. And you've been glaring at Logan for the past twenty minutes ever since he came over here and offered to study with us," Conner stated, his smirk growing bigger as he watched his boyfriend's cheeks begin to burn with embarrassment, "Now, you know how it feels."
"Okay, first of all, I got annoyed because they always came up and tried to talk to you when we were clearly in the middle of a conversation. That would irritate anyone, even a nun—"
"What do nuns have to do with this?"
"—Secondly, I was only looking at your lab partner like that because he kept popping his gum and you know the sound of the shit drives me crazy. Plus, he didn't need to position your chairs right next to each other during the experiment. And, I was not glaring at Liam, which is actually his name, by the way, I was just... observing."
"Observing?" The Kryptonian asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Yes, observing. We're in a library, would you like me to grab you a dictionary? It's when you look at something or someone closely and with attention," Y/N stated, the sarcasm dripping off his words.
"Really? Because it looked more like this," Conner said, before he scrunched his eyebrows together, making a look of intense concentration, his eyes squinting, "Then, the person you were looking at would start to panic and freak out because it looked like you were going to attack them," Y/N held an unimpressed look while actively suppressing the amusing chuckles he felt rising in his stomach.
"Careful sweetie, hold that face for too long and it might get stuck like that," Y/N said.
"Very funny," Conner replied, before his eyes took on a mischievous glint, "I like it when you're jealous, though. Makes you even cuter."
Y/N let out a scoff, "I'm not cute, and I'm not jealous. And if you want to live to see tomorrow, you'll refrain from using those words again."
"Or what?" Conner challenged, a teasing smirk on his face.
"Or, I'll show you just how 'cute' I can be," Y/N threatened.
"Is that a promise or a threat? Cause, I'm hoping for the first one."
"You've been spending way too much time with Wally."
"Maybe. But, I'm not the one who's jealous," Conner said, his smirk still firmly in place.
"Shut up," Y/N said.
"You're cute."
"I'm not."
"Are too."
"Shut up."
"Never."
"Do you want to fight? Because the energy you're giving me right now says you want to fight."
"It's okay, babe. I am also a jealous boyfriend," Conner said.
"I'm so glad you've finally acknowledged it. You know they say the first step in the journey is acceptance and admittance," Y/N said, the sarcasm and humor evident in his voice.
"Whatever. At least I don't deny it like you."
"I've already told you I'm not jealous. You're the jealous one, not me," Y/N argued.
"Whatever you say, babe."
"I'm not!"
"You're so cute when you're in denial," Conner said, reaching a hand across the table and pinching his cheek.
"I will destroy you," Y/N threatened with a fake menacing tone.
"I'd like to see you try, cutie."
Y/N couldn't help but crack a smile at his boyfriend's antics.
"I love you," Y/N said.
"Love you too, even if you are a liar."
"Fuck off."
Across the room, the couple were not aware of the eyes on them as their peers watched them bicker back and forth.
"Ugh, can't those two ever get a room?"
Things seemed to be going well, but not all good things weren't meant to last forever.
Despite their moments of levity and fun, the experiments were still taking a toll on the boy. Y/N's powers were getting harder and harder to control, and the Kryptonian was constantly worried about the boy's safety and well-being.
One lesson Y/N took very seriously from Batman was to always trust his instincts and what his gut was telling him. Those same instincts were telling him that Lex was on to them if his feelings of dread and hyper awareness anytime he and Conner were in class, out on campus, or just anywhere outside of their dorms was anything to go off.
They'd also be fools not to see how just as much as their classmates were observing them, certain members of the faculty were watching them as well. The only thing they couldn't be certain of was if these people knew they were aware of them watching them. Of course, Y/N and Conner both knew the risks of having the Kryptonian on the campus more frequently and the increased chances that Lex would recognize him, even despite the changes in his appearance they did to throw him off.
The teacher and faculty agents the League had sent in were doing their best to uncover Luthor's plot, but even having them on campus watching out for him and Conner didn't do much to ease Y/N's nerves.
Little did he know how right he was to feel on edge.
During one of their sessions while Lex was in the observation room, his assistant came to him with a tablet, "Mr. Luthor, the surveillance footage you requested."
"Thank you. Any developments?"
"Actually, yes, sir. There's a new subject who has joined the school recently," The assistant said, showing footage of their subject eating lunch with the addition in question.
"What's so special about this one?" Lex asked, his eyes narrowing as he watched the two interact.
"From initial gatherings, nothing sir," Mercy said, swiping through the different video files they had recorded of Y/N and this new student around the school since his arrival, "But, after close observation and monitoring, we found the nature of their relationship to be more intimate than expected. And, after noting his unusual practice of never leaving the subject's side for more than a second and their frequent trips off campus together, we ran a facial recognition and found this." She swiped over to an old file from their Cadmus labs in Washington.
Lex's eyebrows raised in recognition while a knowing smile grew across his lips, "Ah, so it seems Project K.R. has gone and fallen in love with our little experiment. How interesting. Expected of course, which gives me a perfect opportunity."
"What would you like us to do, sir?"
"For now, continue monitoring. Keep a close eye on them. If our resident Superboy knows about him and is here assumingly to watch and protect him, we can only assume the League is on to us," Lex instructed, a hand to his chin as he thought over their moves before his usual knowing smirk returned to his face, "Also, reach out to the family of our subject. I do believe it's time we set up a parent-teacher conference."
Mercy nodded at the instructions, before turning to leave. Lex turned back to the one-sided window, watching as the scientists and doctors performed their tests and experiments on Y/N with a knowing smile. He grabbed his phone out of his pocket, opening a message thread and pulling up a photo he received some weeks prior.
A cute and lovely photo it was too of Conner taking a selfie of him and Y/N who was seemingly caught off guard and trying to get the phone back. Lex smiled at the screen with a thoughtful gaze before making his way inside the experiment room, intending to have a little chat with his subject.
Y/N knew something was up, and the only small relief he had to his growing anxiousness was the fact that the League finally had come up with enough evidence and was now formulating a plan to end these experiments and take Luthor down, without risking his parents in the process. Only that seemed less likely when his parents suddenly showed up at the school the following week, surprising both their son and the Kryptonian who immediately became suspicious.
Apparently, Lex had decided to call a meeting with him and his parents to discuss his performance and results. And, if the uneasy dread in his stomach was correct, it definitely had nothing to do with his grades.
The agents immediately reported back to the League, and Conner was insistent that he and Y/N return to Mount Justice as soon as possible, almost certain that Lex was up to something. But, his boyfriend who just as much wanted to agree with the Kryptonian wouldn't allow it.
He was also very aware of the ominous feeling that Lex was setting up something, and that's why he had purposely invited Y/N's parents there. In the past year he'd spent with 'Uncle Lex', he'd gotten to know him pretty well, and getting to know him meant he got to see the parts of Luthor that were cold, calculating and always scheming.
Whether Lex was aware or not that Y/N could see these traits coming out at times, the young superhero noted it. And that's why he was certain he had no choice but to attend this meeting.
Lex got his parents involved for a reason, and he wasn't ready to find out what that reason was. But, Conner was not ready nor willing to let his teammate and boyfriend walk into an obvious trap. Despite his very strong feelings concerning the boy's parents and his wanting to give them a piece of his mind, Y/N's safety was his #1 priority. If his parents were in on the scheme, then any wrong move or miscalculated step could put him at risk, and that wasn't something the Kryptonian was willing to gamble on.
"No, you're not going," Conner stated, leaving no room for argument in his tone, despite knowing his boyfriend would still argue back with him.
"Yes, I am."
"Y/N, this is not up for discussion. You're not going, and that's final." Conner said, looking down straight into his boyfriend's eyes and not budging an inch. In any other scenario, he'd typically argue a little before giving in to the smaller male...not this time.
"Last time I checked, you were not my boss. And you know what will happen if I don't go. Lex will just end up coming after me and my parents," Y/N retorted.
"Fine. Then, I'm coming with you. End of discussion."
"Conner—"
"Y/N, I'm not letting you do this alone. End. Of. Discussion."
"Conner, I have to. You don't understand, he's got something planned and he's not stupid. He knows the League's onto him and this is basically his insurance policy. I can't let my parents get caught up in this," Y/N said, his decision final.
"And I can't let you get hurt," Conner yelled, grabbing Y/N by his shoulders and bringing him closer, his face showing his desperation while Y/N tried to push back the tears building in his eyes, "What if your parents are in on it and this is just you playing into all of their hands? You can't expect to believe that they have no idea what's going on and haven't noticed the condition you've been in all those times you went home."
"You don't think I haven't considered that?! I'm not stupid, Conner. But, if my parents are in on this, then that's something I'll just have to face the reality of. But, I'm their son, superpowers or not, I'm still their kid. That has to count for something," Y/N said, the tears no longer being held back as they broke free and ran down his face.
The Kryptonian softened at the sight and reached his hand up to wipe away the tears, before bringing the boy closer to him and embracing him, his arms wrapping around him as if trying to protect him from the entire world. Just like before, when they stood in the middle of his room at Mount Justice, only this time, the roles were reversed and Conner was the one comforting him.
Just like the many other teens and kids who had the blessing of being gifted with powers and abilities beyond the average human, it came with many circumstances, and sometimes those circumstances outweighed the benefits. As he'd come to learn, he wasn't the only one who had his fair share of daddy and mommy issues, didn't make it hurt any less though.
The idea that his parents couldn't accept him for who he was and would rather subject him to cruel and awful experiments, just to get rid of something they saw as an imperfection in him...stung, to say the least. It wouldn't be the first time he'd wondered about how his life would have turned out had he not had these powers, but he'd be lying if he said it hadn't crossed his mind that maybe his parents would be happier and more accepting.
That thought alone was what made him the most upset. Not the fact that they'd rather see him as a science experiment than their son, but the fact that they'd rather just erase him and get rid of him completely, even if it meant losing their son than having to face the idea of their child being different.
It was something he'd only admitted once before to Conner, and the Kryptonian could still recall the pain he felt at the admission. It was a pain so subtle, yet so raw and so deep that he could feel how much it affected his boyfriend, making his dislike turn to disdain, almost hatred towards his so-called 'parents.'
Now, in the face of everything, Y/N was slowly accepting it as his reality. The thought had been slowly settling in his mind more and more over the past year as these experiments continued. Conner was right. His parents had to have known something was up when they saw him come home the few times he did in the past few months.
If it was enough for his friends and his protectors from the Justice League to see, then they had to have noticed at some point. And the fact that he'd never seen them show any ounce of concern unless it was relating to the state of his 'undesirable traits' as stated by his mother told him everything he needed to know.
At any point, they'd probably agree with what Lex was doing, especially if they knew he was doing it to eliminate Superman and the Justice League. His parents weren't at risk. They never were.
But, the Justice League was.
His Team and friends were at risk.
Conner was at risk, and that was something he wasn't going to take any chance with no matter the cost to himself.
"My parents just texted. They're meeting with Lex in his office. I have to go," Y/N said, going to grab his things and head for the door.
"No, you don't," Conner said, pulling his boyfriend into his hold, "If you think I'm going to willingly let you walk into what's almost certainly a death sentence, then you actually are an idiot. We're going back to Mount Justice and telling the others what's going on."
"I can't, Conner. My parents are already on their way, and if I'm not there, they along with Lex are going to get suspicious. It's one thing if Lex knows about us and the League, but if my parents find out, then we're going to have an even bigger problem to deal with," Y/N argued, still trying to break free from the Kryptonian's embrace.
"And, what about when they figure out you're a superhero and are part of the team who's been working to bring them down? If you're going to that meeting, then I'm going with you, and if I have to, I'll protect them as well. It's not like I can't handle myself. Besides, you'll be there, and we're stronger together," Conner stated.
"No, absolutely not," Y/N refused.
"And why not?"
"Do you honestly think for one moment Lex hasn't prepared a thousand and one different contingency plans? Like I said before, if he invited my parents here, then he did it for a reason. And I'm willing to bet he's got plenty of different backups in case you, Superman, Batman, or anyone from the Team or League tries to intervene. I've spent the last year observing this man, Conner. He's smart, and he's always planning his next move. You should know that more than anyone!"
"Exactly, which is why I'm not going to let him hurt you."
"But, he'll hurt you if you're there! Do you not get it, Conner? If Lex sees you, he'll use you against me. Do you not understand that? If you show up to that meeting, he'll have all the leverage he needs to take everything from me. Despite my not wanting to believe it could be true, I have to accept the reality that my parents may actually be 100% totally on Lex's side, so he won't be able to use them effectively against me like he could if they weren't, which gives me an advantage. An advantage that goes straight out the window if you're there," Y/N explained, hoping the Kryptonian would listen.
"You're not invincible, Conner. Your abilities might rival Superman's, but Lex created you. Even if M'Gann removed all the programming the G-Gnomes did to you before that gave him control over you, Lex still knows how to get to you in ways I couldn't even imagine. And that scares the shit out of me. I can't lose you. I can't," Y/N cried, finally breaking down and dropping his body fully into his boyfriend's arms.
Conner's heart ached at the words, never feeling as helpless and weak as he did at that moment. It seemed no matter how much he tried to protect his boyfriend and keep him safe, all his efforts were in vain, and both of them were at risk of losing the other.
It was amazing how only a year together could bring two individuals who hadn't known each other and were seemingly doing just fine on their own before, could reach a point where they felt like they couldn't go on without the other, and just the thought of was enough to send them down a spiral of panic and misery.
Conner wrapped both his arms around Y/N's waist at that moment, holding him in what could be considered a lethally crushing embrace while digging his face into the smaller boy's neck. His boyfriend never complained though, holding on to his Kryptonian just as tight while rubbing his hands through his hair and up and down his back, his tears still falling silently down his face.
The Kryptonian couldn't hold back his own tears as he felt them drop down his face, hiding his face even further to prevent his boyfriend from seeing him cry. One of them had to be strong for the other, and Conner decided it would always be him. It was what he was made for. His grip grew tighter with every second as he fought the urge to just break through the window and run off with his boyfriend, hiding them away forever.
He wanted nothing more than to take him away from all this. To take him somewhere far away from all the danger and chaos that plagued their lives and just live. The fantasy of having a simple life with Y/N and getting married, settling down, and starting a family was the only thing he could think about now.
"I love you, Conner. You've done a great job at protecting me so far, but, just this once, let me protect you. Let me keep you safe," Y/N whispered, his voice strained and hoarse.
"I love you, Y/N. I promise we'll figure this out, and we'll have that forever we talked about before. Just wait for me," Conner said, pulling back just enough so he could look the smaller boy in the eye, placing a gentle kiss on his forehead, his cheeks, and the tip of his nose, before finally landing on his lips.
"With open arms," Y/N replied, the smile on his face bittersweet, yet full of love and promise.
"With open arms," Conner repeated, the tears still running down his face, and his arms still refusing to let go of the boy.
The two embraced in a bruising kiss, one full of desperation and pain, and a silent promise. When the kiss broke, Y/N pulled the Kryptonian into his chest, his fingers running through his dark hair and rubbing small circles on his back, and Conner closed his eyes, allowing the touch to soothe him, wishing he could stay there forever.
"That was so cheesy," Y/N chuckled messily through his tears.
"You were the one who said it," Conner smiled, his eyes still closed as he buried his face into his boyfriend's chest.
"Shut up," Y/N laughed lightly, his hands still rubbing Conner's back.
"I'll let you go, but only on one condition," The Kryptonian spoke, his eyes opening and looking into the eyes of the boy in his arms.
Y/N looked at him, holding back a sad chuckle, knowing the Kryptonian wouldn't let it go easily, "What is it?"
"You have to let Batman and one of our friends go with you, just as a backup. They don't have to go with you inside the meeting, but I'll feel better knowing you have some sort of reinforcement. And the only other option if you don't agree to that is me throwing you over my shoulder and taking you back to Mount Justice."
Y/N almost opened his mouth to argue but held back his words, knowing Conner wouldn't budge and would likely follow through on his threat. He sighed, knowing the Kryptonian wouldn't let him do this alone, despite his protests.
"Okay," He relented, hoping for once that his boyfriend could not read him as easily as he did.
"Promise me," Conner said, the determination and stubbornness still present in his eyes, "You promise me, okay? Promise me, you won't go alone," He demanded.
Y/N nodded, "I promise."
"No, say it. I need to hear it," Conner ordered.
"I won't go alone, Conner. I promise."
"Good," Conner sighed, his grip on his boyfriend relaxing, "Now, who are you going to bring with you?"
"Wally, I think," Y/N answered, "He's fast and can get me out of there pretty quickly if things get out of hand."
"Fine, but just know, if anything happens, I'll come and get you myself," Conner declared.
"I know. But, I'll be okay. Everything will be fine," Y/N reassured, "I love you."
"I love you, too," Conner said before getting up, "Now, you stay here, and do not go to that meeting until I'm back with Batman and Wally. Got it?"
Y/N rolled his eyes playfully, "Yes, sir."
"Good. Remember what you promised," Conner said, before leaning forward and kissing his boyfriend again, the kiss much sweeter and calmer than the one before, but with the same amount of passion and love behind it. He pulled away, giving his boyfriend one last glance before heading out of the room.
That was the last time he saw Y/N.
Conner wasted no time in getting back to the Zeta Gateway to Mount Justice, not caring who saw him leaping across the campus and the city. When he finally made it back to the Cave, he explained the situation and demanded Batman and Wally return with him. Wally had no problem going along with it, not liking the fact that his friend was being put in danger, and not caring that the Kryptonian's protective nature was kicking in, knowing they were all a little protective of their teammate and friend.
Batman needed a few more details, but when he had the whole story, he immediately called in Superman along with the rest of the Team. Conner truly didn't care at that moment, as long as they got back before Y/N did something stupid. Despite the smaller boy's wishes, they were not granted, as the Kryptonian could clearly see his boyfriend was planning something.
When they made it back, Batman held back, opting for Robin to go in his place with him, Conner, and Wally. The three boys, each now dressed in their Team attire made their way to Y/N's dorm, only to find it empty, their teammate nowhere in sight. Conner had to physically hold back from tearing the entire school apart.
"Where the fuck is he?!" Conner screamed, his patience and concern growing thin.
"Calm down, Supey. He probably saw we were coming and made his way to the meeting. Let's just follow the plan and get there so we can be ready to jump in when he needs us," Kid Flash said, trying to calm the Kryptonian down.
"Where's the meeting at?" Robin asked.
Conner took a few deep breaths, trying to get ahold of himself, "He told me it was in Luthor's office. Knowing him, he probably lied thinking I would've gone after him by myself. I'll bet they're meeting in the science building where they've been doing the experiments," He theorized.
"Then, what are we waiting for?" Kid Flash said before the trio made their way over, alerting Batman, Superman, and the rest of their team.
But, by the time they made it, it was too late.
On the outside, the building looked fine. But, on the inside, everything was destroyed. It almost looked like a nuclear bomb had gone off inside the building. The testing lab, where they usually performed the experiments on Y/N was in even worse shape than the rest of the building.
All the equipment and furniture was completely demolished, and the one-sided mirror Lex would watch from was shattered, with a small hole in the wall behind it, indicating the explosion came from the inside.
There were scorch marks everywhere, the smell of burnt metal and plastic filling the air as the four boys walked around the scene. The League had already contacted the police and the fire department, and the school's administration was currently being investigated and questioned by the local authorities.
They couldn't find Y/N though. They managed to find students and faculty who were in the building and trapped under rubble. They found some of the scientists hiding in various spots in the destroyed wreckage of the room like they were trying to shield themselves from the damage.
They even managed to locate Mercy Graves, who was unconscious in the rubble.
But, no signs of their missing friend and teammate.
No trace of Lex Luthor or Y/N's parents either which made the rising anger and panic Superboy was feeling reach astronomical levels.
"Where the hell is he?!" Conner shouted, his patience finally giving out and the anger and concern he'd been feeling the past hour finally bubbling over.
"Superboy, calm down," Batman said, "We'll find him."
"And how can you be so sure? We've been looking for over an hour, and there's no sign of him," Conner yelled, the worry and concern in his voice very clear.
"Superboy, relax. We'll find him, don't worry," Superman said, only to be interrupted by the groan of an awakening Mercy Graves.
"You won't find him," She said, coughing a few times and holding her head as she sat up.
Superboy made his way over to the woman, grabbing her off the ground and throwing her against one of the few remaining walls in the room.
"Superboy!" Batman shouted.
"Where is he," Superboy growled, ignoring his mentor and leader's warnings.
"I told you, you won't find him," Mercy said, smiling through her bloody and bruised lips.
Superboy, very much past his limit, wrapped his hand around the woman's throat, lifting her into the air, "Tell me where he is right now, or I promise I will choke the life out of you right now and enjoy doing it."
By the tone of his voice and the warning squeeze he gave around her throat that had the bodyguard wincing in pain, he was not bluffing.
"Superboy, stand down! We need her to talk," Superman ordered.
"Why? She clearly knows something and she's not telling us," Superboy retorted, a dark and ominous tone to his voice no one had ever heard from him before as he watched the tears build in her eyes from not being able to breathe, "Might as well make sure she never speaks another word again. Save us all the trouble."
"And how will that help you find him?" Batman asked.
"It won't. But, I'll feel a lot better," The half-Kryptonian said, turning his attention back to Mercy, who was trying her best to remove the hand from her throat.
"Superboy, release her and stand down now. That's an order," Batman said.
He seemingly was done listening to them though, his anger-filled gaze focused solely on the woman choking and gasping for breath as her throat was crushed slowly under his grip.
"Superboy, that's enough. You're going to kill her," Batman said, trying to reason with his clone.
"So, what? She's not telling us anything, and she's working for Lex. Who cares if she dies?"
"We need her alive. If she knows something, then we have other ways of getting her to talk. But, if you kill her, you may lose your only chance at finding him. Now, let her go," Superman ordered.
Everyone stood still at that moment, the sounds of debris flying and police sirens drowned out by the struggling noises coming from Lex's bodyguard as she fought to keep herself awake and alive under the deathly grip the Kryptonian had her in. His face was hard, his rage clear as day and not showing any signs of relenting.
Batman was prepared to use external measures, signaling Robin when the Kryptonian suddenly backed off. He released his grip over the woman's throat, letting her fall to the ground as she gasped and coughed for breath. Without another word, Superboy walked out of the room, not turning back as his peers and mentors stared after him in worry.
Superman had to stop him from tearing apart the entire school, as Conner was resigned to doing whatever he could to find his teammate and lover, at whatever cost. Thankfully, Batman was smart in bringing the others along as they were all able to assist in subduing him before anything else got destroyed or someone else got hurt in the process.
it wasn't easy for any of them, as they could understand the world of anger and hurt he was in. It was even harder when Batman gave them all pieces of Kryptonite to subdue him, making it easier for them to take him back to Mount Justice while they wrapped up their investigations.
They weren't able to get much out of Mercy, as she apparently wasn't present for the entire meeting and had only just returned before everything went to hell. She knew some details of Luthor's plans but not everything, but she wasn't the only one they apprehended. They detained some of the scientists who were working on the experiments themselves and brought them in for questioning.
"The experiments were designed to remove the subject's powers and abilities, as requested by his parents. Make no mistake, Mr. Luthor had no plans to deceive Mr. & Mrs. L/N. He had full intentions of honoring their wishes and returning their son to them as a normal child with no powers. However, his motives for doing so were not exactly what they may have thought. Mr. Luthor didn't just intend to remove the young boy's powers, he meant to extract them and duplicate them, hoping to copy those abilities into a new generation of Genomorph clones."
This wasn't news. They knew most of this already, but the truth spell Zatanna cast seemingly worked, as they hadn't gotten this much detail out of the assistant/bodyguard before. Conner couldn't care less though.
All he was concerned about was any information she had that could lead them to finding Y/N. It became all he cared about.
But, it seemed all Batman, Superman, and his so-called friend cared about were the experiments that were performed on him. Experiments that they allowed to go on for more than a year.
"Mr. Luthor theorized the key to extraction and duplication in the matter of the subject's abilities lay within the source of his powers. Only after several experiments were the scientists assigned to the matter able to narrow the source down to a matter of three categories. Genetic Inheritance, Biomolecular Engineering, or Magic. While the direct source was never identified, they had created many different strategies to test extraction and duplication before Mr. Luthor eventually found the correct one, which was the reason for his invitation to the subject's parents. However, one variable was unaccounted for."
"What was it?" Superman asked.
"Though it was never discovered what the source of the subject's abilities was, we did discover various effects and consequences of a potential pathogen that was destroying our serums and nullifying our experiments, which caused almost irreversible damage on the subject and potentially his power source as well. We realized the subject's body was now not only fighting against our serums and experiments, it was rejecting its own innate abilities, essentially fighting a war within itself. It was theorized that since the serums were designed to essentially tamper with the subject's powers, and the body was actively trying to expel the serums, it as a result tried to expel a part of itself as well. This caused substantial side effects, and Mr. Luthor was forced to postpone the achievement of his ultimate goal until he could be sure the subject would not die before extraction and duplication were complete."
The dilutions they were giving Y/N. The S.T.A.R. Labs scientists were right all along. And if they hadn't stopped giving Y/N the solutions when they did, they could've actually killed him from the inside.
Suddenly, everyone was grateful when Conner didn't stick around for the interrogations like he planned to, or else none of them knew how he'd react. If the way he almost crushed Mercy's throat against the wall when she wouldn't answer him was anything to go by, they'd rather not find out. Dick, Kaldur, and Wally already had a taste of it once.
They weren't keen on experiencing it again.
"What was the last thing you saw before the explosion?" Batman asked.
"Mr. Luthor had the subject restrained. He'd had him injected with the final serum, a special concoction our scientists had developed. It was supposed to neutralize the subject's powers and allow us to safely extract them. Once the extraction was complete, the subject would have been returned to his parents, and the serum would have been used to create a new generation of Genomorphs with the subject's powers that would be under Mr. Luthor's complete and total control. However, when the extraction began, something went wrong and the subject's body reacted negatively, causing his powers to go haywire, causing the explosion. I was knocked out during the blast and only woke up after your arrival. When I came to, the room was destroyed, and the subject was nowhere to be found along with Mr. Luthor and his parents. That's all I remember."
"Do you have any idea where they could've gone?"
"It is likely Mr. Luthor took himself and the subjects to safety in one of his remote locations. He is a very resourceful man and had me arrange means of emergency transportation and shelter in case anything grew out of his control. I would have been the one to escort him if I had not been caught in the blast myself. As for the subject himself, one of our scientists has summarized that he was likely vaporized from the overflux of power. The chance of his survival is almost non-existent."
A solemn mood fell over everyone at the news. Zatanna and M'Gann were distraught at the news while Artemis did her best to hide how crushed she was. Dick, Kaldur, and Wally were no better, each expressing their own forms of grief in different ways.
Batman, Superman, Flash, and the other members of the League were also plagued with remorse and guilt at the verdict. It was their fault. Especially the first three since they were the ones who brought Y/N into all of this in the first place.
And despite all the pain and anguish they were all feeling, they knew it wouldn't compare to how Conner would feel. No of them had the heart to tell him either way.
How do you tell someone the love of their life is dead?
No one had the answer, but it seemed, they didn't need it in the first place. When Conner returned to find out what Mercy and the scientists had said, all it took was one look around the room, seeing the red and wet eyes and the looks of despair on all their faces, and he just knew.
He didn't need anyone to tell him.
He didn't need the confirmation.
He didn't need anything.
Except maybe the ability to turn back time.
Because, if he could, he would've gone back and stopped Y/N from going to that meeting. He would've done what he wanted to do in the first place and just tossed the stubborn boy over his shoulder and taken him far away, somewhere safe and hidden, and never let him leave. He would've stayed with him forever, and they would've lived happily ever after.
Somehow, no one was surprised when Conner made for the vehicle hangar, clearly intending to leave.
"Where are you going?" Superman asked.
"I'm going to find him," Conner replied, his voice cold and devoid of any emotion.
"Conner, there's no point. We've searched everywhere. There's no trace of him, and Mercy said-"
"I don't give a shit what Mercy said! I'm going to find him, and I'm going to bring him home. I'm not giving up on him," Conner shouted, the tears threatening to spill from his eyes.
He was on Sphere, aka Super-Cycle, and out the door before any of them had the chance to argue.
When he didn't return for almost an entire day, they knew they had to go looking for the Kryptonian. They figured the best place to start would be Y/N's home city, the school, and certain areas around Happy Harbor.
They were right, though they didn't find him exactly where they thought.
After searching the school and their old dorm rooms, all of which showed clear signs of the Kryptonian's presence if the various holes in the wall and broken furniture were any indication. Yet, nothing of Y/N's was touched or destroyed. In fact, lots of it was neatly put together and packed away, as if someone was coming back for it. They figured Conner planned to take his stuff back to the Cave and keep it as mementos to his lost love.
It wasn't until they were flying back toward the Cave when Dick spotted him in a very familiar area. He was sitting on the ground, staring at the sky while leaning against the same tree he and the others had tied Y/N to when they thought he was a mole.
"Hey, guys, I found him," Dick said, "He's at the park."
"Alright, we'll meet you there," Batman replied over the comms.
"No, wait. Don't come here. Just...just stay where you are. I'll handle this," Robin said, his voice low and sad.
"Are you sure, Robin?" Aqualad asked.
"Yeah, I'm sure. I'll call you if I need you," Robin said before instructing M'Gann to land the Bioship a little bit away. He knew Conner would notice their arrival, but he figured it'd be easier if he just went himself.
"Hey, Supey," Robin called out, walking up to the Kryptonian.
"Go away, Dick," Conner said, his voice still cold and empty.
"I'm not going anywhere, Conner. Not until you talk to me," Robin said, sitting down next to the Kryptonian.
"I don't want to talk. I just want to be alone," Conner said.
"Well, you can be alone with a friend nearby. I'm not leaving, and neither are the others. We're worried about you, and we're not going to leave you alone. You're not the only one who's hurting, Conner. We all are. But, we're not going to get through this if we don't stick together. So, please, just talk to me. Let me help you," Robin pleaded.
"I don't need help. I need to find him," Conner said, his voice cracking a bit.
"Conner, we've looked everywhere. There's no sign of him. Even the League is looking, and they haven't found anything. There's nothing left to look for," Robin said, his voice soft and gentle.
"That's because they're not looking hard enough. I know he's out there. I can feel it. I can feel him. I can't explain it, but I know he's alive," Conner said, his voice growing firm.
"Conner, I know you want to believe that, but-"
The Boy Wonder was made silent when a folder piece of paper was shoved against his chest. When Conner didn't look back at him and just continued looking toward the sky, Dick figured he wanted him to read whatever he just gave him.
So, he did.
"Is this—"
"A fake letter someone tried to make imitating Y/N so I'd think he was dead? Yeah, it is," Conner answered, his voice still cold and devoid of emotion.
"But, how did you know?"
"I didn't. Not at first. When I got back to his dorm to see if I could find him or anything that would lead to him, I found that waiting for me on the bed. I started to read it, but I could barely get past the first three sentences without wanting to rip it to shreds. It sounded nothing like him. Nothing like the way he talked, not to mention the handwriting was too perfect," Conner explained, his voice growing softer and more emotional.
"So, someone wrote a fake letter to make you think Y/N was dead?" Dick had to admit, what Conner was saying wasn't completely off-track. He'd only known Y/N for a little over a year, but reading this letter, he agreed with the Kryptonian it sounded nothing like their teammate. But, then an image of the destroyed lab flashed in his head, and then Mercy's absolute sureness that he couldn't survive the blast...
"Ok, I see what you mean, but—"
"But, what?! What, Dick," Conner snapped, turning to his friend with a glowering look, "You think I'm crazy? You think I'm delusional? You think I'm making this up? Let me be clear since I wasn't before; if I really thought and believed Y/N was dead, I'd have gone and finished choking the life out of his useless assistant and went looking for any possible trace of Lex Luthor so I could stick my fist through his chest and God knows what if I managed to find his sorry excuse of parents."
Dick was taken aback by the Kryptonian's words, not expecting the sudden outburst.
"He's alive, Dick. And I'm going to find him," Conner stated, his tone leaving no room for argument. The only person who'd ever be able to argue against him was lost somewhere, the Kryptonian was convinced of this, and no one but Y/N would be able to convince him otherwise.
Days turned to weeks, and weeks turned to months. Before anyone knew it, a year had gone by, and no sign of Y/N had turned up.
It was hard to watch for many of the members of their team. Some of them wanted to believe Conner was right and actively helped him in his search for the first few months, but when they kept running into dead end after dead end, they slowly lost hope. Choosing to deal with their feelings of loss and move on with their lives instead of chasing someone they were positive wasn't coming back.
Conner didn't share the same sentiment. In -act, he was more than angry with his so-called 'friends' when they had all but thrown in the towel.
"You're just giving up on him?!" Conner yelled, his anger and frustration clear.
"We're not giving up, Conner. We're just trying to move on," M'Gann said, her voice calm and gentle.
"Move on? Move on?! How can you even say that? You're literally just giving up on him!"
"Conner, we're not giving up. We're just accepting the circumstances and choosing to move on," Zatanna said, her voice calm and understanding.
"He's not gone! He's not dead! He's not!"
"Dude, we're not saying he's dead. If he is alive, we don't think he's coming back," Wally spoke, trying to choose his words carefully.
"What the hell is the difference?!"
"The difference is that we're accepting that he's not coming back. And we're not going to waste our lives waiting for him," Artemis said, her voice a little more firm and serious.
"Waste our lives? You're calling looking for him a waste of time?!"
"No one said that Conner," Kaldur spoke, throwing a pointed look toward the blonde archer, "We're just saying that we've been looking for him for a year, and we haven't found anything. We've looked everywhere, and we've come up with nothing. We've exhausted every option, and we're not getting anywhere. We're not saying he's dead, but we can't spend the rest of our lives looking for him either," He explained.
"No, I've been looking for him for a year. You all gave up on him after the first few months," Conner yelled at his teammates.
"Conner, we didn't give up on him. We're just trying to move on," M'Gann repeated.
"And what if it was one of you? Would you have wanted us to give up on you then? Huh?!"
"Of course not, but-"
"Then, why are you giving up on him?"
"Because, it's not the same, Conner. It's not the same," Dick said, his voice a little louder and firmer than the others.
"No, it is the same. Fine! Give up for all I care. I didn't need your help anyway," The Kryptonian said, turning his back on his friends and walking away.
"Conner, wait," M'Gann called out, but the Kryptonian ignored her, continuing his walk.
"Let him go, M'Gann. He needs some time," Kaldur said, placing a comforting hand on the Martian's shoulder.
"But, we can't just let him go. He's not thinking clearly," She argued.
"He's not thinking at all," Artemis said, her arms crossed.
"Artemis," Kaldur warned.
"What? It's true. Have none of you paid attention for the past year?! He won't even consider the possibility that Y/N is dead," She said.
"He's not ready to accept that," Zatanna spoke, her voice quiet and solemn.
"Well, he's going to have to. We can't keep doing this. We can't keep chasing after him. We have lives, and we have missions, and we can't keep putting them on hold," Artemis said.
"She's right," Wally said, earning a surprised look from his girlfriend, "I want Y/N to be alive just as much as any of us, but we can't keep doing this. We can't keep chasing him. We have other things to worry about. We have school, jobs, missions, and families. We can't keep putting them on hold."
"I agree," Kaldur said, "As much as I hate to say it, we have to move on. We have to accept the fact that he's not coming back."
Everyone else murmured their agreement, while M'Gann still looked a bit hesitant.
"What do we do about Conner? He's not going to give up."
"I say we give him another month, and if hasn't come around, then we have an intervention and force him to wake up to reality," Artemis suggested.
"That might be a bit much," Zatanna said.
"Well, what do you suggest? We can't just let him keep going on like this. He's not going to stop, and he's not going to listen to us. We have to do something," Artemis argued.
"I agree, but I don't think an intervention is the best idea," Kaldur said.
"Well, what do you suggest?"
"I think we should just give him some space. Let him cool off and come to terms with the situation on his own."
"And if he doesn't?"
"Then, we intervene."
Things didn't get better as Artemis predicted.
With it seemingly just being himself now that his friends had given up, Conner had become even more obsessed with finding Y/N. He'd slowly done another 180 and turned into a worse version of himself when he came out of the pod.
His temper was back and stronger than ever. He barely spent time around his friends, and he was making rash decisions on missions. Black Canary and Superman both tried to intervene to talk to him, even looking into getting professional psychiatric counseling to help Conner deal with his grief.
None of it worked.
Everyone knew how much he loved—how much he loves—Y/N.
They knew how much he cared about him.
They knew how much he didn't want to believe what happened just as much as they knew he wouldn't accept it.
Conner refused to believe it.
He didn't want to.
He couldn't.
He wouldn't.
He wouldn't believe it until he saw the body.
Until he held him in his arms.
Until he could feel his heartbeat or no heartbeat at all.
His teammates and mentors could intervene all they wanted, it wasn't going to change anything. Either Conner was going to find Y/N, or he was going to die trying. Simple as that.
All the Kryptonian could think about was Y/N and the idea of him being lost and alone somewhere in the world, without him or anyone else to help him. He already failed him once, he wasn't going to do it again.
Even while going through the old interrogation videos they had on file from the scientists and Mercy Graves from the day of the accident, he was thinking about Y/N and the moments they used to share.
Their sparring sessions which frequently ended with them play-wrestling and making out on the floor or against the cave walls. All their dates into Happy Harbor whenever Y/N had free time and didn't have to report back to his school immediately that night. Their movie nights where they'd cuddle and watch all of Y/N's favorite movies and shows wanted, and Conner would pretend to hate it but secretly enjoyed it.
He'd even randomly found himself watching more of the show with the talking sponge and sea creatures, which he still had a hard time understanding. He just knew his favorite episode was always the one he remembered watching with Y/N when they were cuddled on the couch after his near accident that same day.
Y/N was lying against a pillow on the arm of the sofa while Conner lay on top of him, resting between his legs. The Kryptonian's head of dark hair was laid on his chest, and his arms wrapped around the waist of his body, like a child hugging their favorite teddy bear.
He had his arms rested over Conner's shoulders, one of his hands rubbing up and down the Kryptonian's back while the other massaged his head, fingers threading through his dark hair while they watched the ‘Graveyard Shift' episode from Spongebob Squarepants.
“I still don’t get it,” Conner spoke gruffly, “How is he a talking sponge? What gives him the ability to speak and walk?
The smaller boy chuckled at his words, feeling how the Kryptonian nuzzled his head against his chest from the vibration of his laughs.
“I don’t know. It’s a cartoon. Not everything is supposed to make sense.”
“How am I supposed to follow along if I don’t get how the world functions?” He responded, taking one of his arms from under you to gesture at the TV. You couldn’t help the sigh and eye roll that came from your lips at your boyfriend’s antics.
As Spongebob screamed frantically while running to throw the trash out, Y/N removed his hand from Conner’s head to grab his phone off the coffee table. His baby of a Kryptonian let out a disgruntled noise, raising his head to look at him with one of his signature frowns, “Oh, calm down, you big baby. I was just grabbing my phone.” He laughed.
Conner found himself smiling at the memory, always remembering how the sound of Y/N's laugh brought him happiness, despite his occasional grumpiness from losing his head rubs.
He swore for a quick moment he could even remember the feeling of the smaller male's hands running across his head, rubbing his scalp, and playing with different sections of his hair.
It was one of the many memories he had of the two of them, and he cherished each and every one.
He'd never forget the way Y/N's eyes lit up when he talked about his favorite shows and movies, or the way his face would scrunch up in concentration when he was working on a particularly difficult math problem. He always hated math.
Conner would never forget the way his heart would race and his stomach would flutter when he'd catch the smaller boy staring at him, or the way his cheeks would flush and his lips would curl into a smile when he'd catch him. He'd never forget the way his body felt pressed against his, or the way his lips tasted, or the way his skin felt under his fingertips.
The way his name sounded rolling off his tongue, or the way his voice sounded when he was moaning his name. He'd never forget the way his touch made him feel, or the way his presence made him feel. He'd never forget the way his love made him feel.
A particular memory came to mind when Conner was attending the boarding school to watch and protect his boyfriend. It was one of the last peaceful nights he remembered having with him before Y/N found out his parents were coming to the school and their lives were turned upside down.
They were thinking of their lives at the school, wondering what their lives would be like if they didn't have to worry about Lex or his parents. It was something of a dream.
Like a little teaser into what their lives would be like when they were past this entire mess. When all was said and done, Y/N fully intended to follow through on his boyfriend's many invitations to move into the Cave and transfer to Happy Harbor. He definitely wouldn't go back to living with his parents, even if they had changed their minds and views on superheroes and the Justice League.
It was something he and the Kryptonian talked about often, even more, when they found moments of quiet on campus and even before.
The couple was currently lying in Conner's dorm room on his bed, the Kryptonian holding his smaller boyfriend against his body as he slowly regained his strength after another testing session that almost sent him into a mild seizure. Lex was only getting more determined and ruthless in these experiments, throwing all caution to the wind and instructing the scientists to use whatever they had.
Conner was more than angry and was ready to find the bald man and rip his head off his body, but he knew Y/N needed him more at that moment. One of the undercover League agents knew what was going on and supplied the Kryptonian with emergency tools that the scientists at S.T.A.R. Labs said it would be safe to use in case Y/N had any bad reactions to some of the tests.
Thankfully, Conner's roommate was gone for the night, so they didn't have to worry about him coming back. They lay on his bed in quiet, both staring out the large window of the dorm at the bright moon in the cloudless sky. Y/N's body was racked with a small shudder and/or twitch now and then, but for the most part, he was calm and he was comfortable feeling completely at peace and safe in the Kryptonian's arms.
Something was on his mind though, something the Kryptonian could tell he was waiting to ask as he felt his boyfriend's fingers tapping softly against pec, "What's on your mind, babe?"
The smaller boy felt a small smile spreading across his face, the blushing feeling in his chest at how well his boyfriend knew him, sensing when he had something that was bothering him or just weighing on his mind, "Why couldn't we just stay in your room that night forever?"
The Kryptonian couldn't help but smile at the memory, "If I remember correctly, that's exactly what I was trying to get you to agree to, but someone wanted to be stubborn."
"That someone has a name, thank you," He said, his voice muffled slightly, but the humor was still evident.
"Yeah, and they're also an idiot," Conner retorted, feeling the light smack against his chest.
"I hate you."
"No, you don't," Conner responded.
"No, I don't," Y/N confirmed.
The air was silent for a moment, as they just lay there in each other's presence, holding on to as much of the peaceful moment as they could, knowing at some point, reality would come knocking to pull them out of the safe space that was each other's presence.
"You know we can have that, right?" Conner asked.
Y/N looked up at his Kryptonian, "Have what?"
"Forever. Like you said that night in my room, we can have that. You can stay at the Cave with me, Zatanna, and M'Gann and you can share my room with me. You can transfer to Happy Harbor and we can go to school together. I'll even join the football team and let you be my cheerleader like in all those dumb movies you have me watch with you," Conner explained, his voice growing softer as he laid out their future together.
"First off, don't act like you don't enjoy those movies just as much as I do. Secondly, if anything, I'd be on the football team and you'd be my cheerleader," Y/N retorted, the Kryptonian scoffing at the mere idea of that even happening, "And, lastly, don't think I'm not on to you and you're real intentions of trying to get me to share a room with you."
Conner's mischievous smile along with his peculiar hand placement gave away the Kryptonian's thoughts at his boyfriend's words, "I have no idea what you're suggesting. But, even if I did, I'm your boyfriend, so I'd argue that I'm allowed to have those intentions."
"And that's why I'll be making sure I get my own room," Y/N smirked.
"Not if I can help it," Conner retorted, before leaning down and pressing a kiss to his boyfriend's lips.
"You're impossible," Y/N said, his voice soft and his eyes full of love.
"But, you love me," Conner replied, his voice equally as soft and his eyes full of love.
"I do," Y/N said, his voice barely above a whisper, "I love you."
"I love you too," Conner said, his voice matching his boyfriend's, leaning down to press another kiss, this one deeper against the smaller boy's lips.
"We'll have that, right? We'll have our forever?" Y/N asked when they eventually broke apart.
"Of course, we will. I promise," Conner said, his voice firm and his eyes serious.
"Good," Y/N said, his voice soft and his eyes full of hope and love.
"Good," Conner repeated, his voice soft and his eyes full of love.
"Hey, Supey, you in here?" Wally's voice called out, startling the Kryptonian from his memories.
He and Dick walked into the mission room, finding the Kryptonian standing in front of the computer, watching the interrogation videos.
"What are you doing?"
"Watching the interrogation videos," Conner answered, his voice cold and devoid of emotion.
"Again? Dude, you've watched those a million times. You're not going to find anything new," Wally said, his voice a bit exasperated.
"Maybe not, but I'm not going to stop looking," Conner said, his tone leaving no room for argument.
"Dude, you can't keep torturing yourself like this. We've exhausted every option, and haven't gotten anywhere. Maybe you're right, and he's not actually dead. But, if he hasn't come back yet, maybe it's time for you to move on. You can't spend the rest of your life looking for him," Wally said, his voice a bit firmer and more serious.
"And did you ever consider that maybe he hasn't come back because he's being held captive, and hasn't managed to escape?" Conner asked, not even turning an eye to the speedster as he continued watching the videos.
"Yes, we have considered the idea. But, have you considered the possibility that he actually may just be dead?" Wally blurted.
Conner visibly tensed at the suggestion, Dick throwing a nervous look toward the speedster who looked well aware and positively anxious at his word choice. A few moments of silence passed as the next video loaded, neither of the two males knowing what to say before the Kryptonian replied.
"He's not dead."
"And how do you know that?" Dick asked softly.
"Because I just do, Dick. Alright, is that good enough for the two of you?" Conner snapped.
"No, it's not," Wally spoke, his voice a bit firmer, "You do realize it's scientifically impossible for you to have some psychic connection that tells you if Y/N is alive. You need to face reality."
"Dude, back off," Dick said, seeing how the speedster's words were starting to get to the Kryptonian.
"No, I'm not backing off. He needs to hear this. He's not going to wake up and accept the facts until someone makes him," Wally argued.
"Okay, KF. I get what you mean. But, this isn't going to help anything." Dick tried to warn his friend of the increasingly agitated Kryptonian, but it seemed Wally also was no longer listening.
"Face the facts, Conner. He's not coming back. And, if he is, which is highly unlikely, it's not going to be anytime soon. You can't keep doing this. We're all worried about you. You need help, man," Wally said.
"Wally, dude seriously, chill out," Dick said.
"What I need is for you to leave me alone," Conner growled, his hands clenched into fists.
"I'm not going to leave you alone. Not until you accept the truth. He's gone, Conner. And, he's not coming back," Wally said, his voice stern and unwavering.
"No's he not," Conner said, his voice low and his tone dangerous.
"Then, where is he?! Huh, Conner?! Where is he?!"
"KF, cut it out."
"What's going on in here?" Kaldur said, entering the mission room along with the girls.
"Nothing," Conner growled, his eyes turning back to the screen.
"It doesn't sound like nothing," Artemis said, her arms crossed.
"Well, it is. So, leave me alone," Conner said, his voice a bit louder and his tone a bit harsher.
"Conner, are you alright?" M'Gann asked, her voice soft and concerned.
"I'm fine," He growled.
"Are you sure? Because you're not acting like it," Artemis said, her voice a little more firm.
"Artemis," Kaldur warned.
"No, she's right. He's not," Wally said, "He's been watching the interrogation videos again."
"Dude," Dick turned to his friend with a warning tone knowing where this would lead if it wasn't put to a stop.
"What? It's true. He's not accepting the fact that Y/N is dead," Wally said, his voice a bit louder.
"Seriously, knock it off," Dick said, his voice a bit more firm.
"No, I'm not going to stop. In fact, I told you we should've deleted these videos a long time ago. He's been obsessing over them," Wally said, his voice rising.
That got Conner's attention again, and everyone could see it by the furious twitch in his brow.
"Wally, knock it off," Dick said, his voice a bit louder.
"No, dude! He's not listening to us. He's not listening to the League. He's not listening to anyone. He's not listening to the facts. He's not even listening to his own heart, He's not accepting the fact that Y/N is gone," Wally yelled, his voice getting louder and louder.
"Wally, drop it!" Kaldur shouted.
"He's not coming back, Conner. He's not coming back. He's not-"
"Shut up," Conner growled.
"He's not coming back. He's dead, Conner! Are you listening to me right now? Y/N is dead!"
"I said shut up!" Conner roared, his fist flying and hitting the speedster square in the jaw, sending him flying across the room until he landed on the floor by the wall with a sickening thud.
"Conner!"
"Wally!"
Artemis, M'Gann, and Zatanna ran over to Wally to check on him while Kal and Dick shoved Conner away from the computer.
"Dude, what the hell," Dick yelled, his voice a mix of anger and shock.
"He deserved it," Conner growled, his fists clenched and his body shaking.
"You didn't have to hit him," Kaldur said, his voice a mixture of concern and frustration.
"Yes, I did. He wouldn't shut up," Conner said, his voice cold and his eyes full of rage.
Neither would admit it, but both males were very unsettled by the dark and dead look that seemed to be cast over their friend as he stared back at them blankly. If they both unconsciously stepped back to ensure they weren't within swinging distance, it wasn't anyone's business but their own.
"Conner, you can't just go around hitting people because they're saying things you don't want to hear," Kaldur said, his voice a combination of authority and worry.
"Yes, I can. Especially when they're saying things that are wrong," Conner said, his voice still calm and his eyes still cold.
"He's not wrong, Conner. We've all accepted the fact that Y/N is gone. And, it's time you do the same," Kaldur said, his voice a bit sterner.
"I'm not accepting anything," Conner said, his voice a bit louder.
"Conner, you have to. You can't keep living like this," Kaldur said, his voice growing softer and his eyes pleading.
"Apparently, Kal, you've got the same listening issue as Dick and everyone else around here. I'd say it in Atlantean for you, but I don't speak fish so I guess you're just going to have to deal with English. I'm not accepting anything. I'm not giving up. I'm not going to stop looking for him. I'm not going to stop believing. I'm not going to stop hoping. And, I'm not going to stop loving him," Conner said, his voice a lot louder and his eyes a lot colder.
A small groan was heard from the other side of the room, as Artemis and M'Gann managed to prop Wally over their shoulders, getting him back on his feet slowly.
"Hopefully, this teaches you to keep your mouth shut in the future," Conner said before walking off, his teammates watching his retreating back in silence.
"Dude, what the hell," Wally groaned, his head throbbing.
"You deserved it," Artemis said, her voice a bit harsh.
"What the hell did I do?"
"You're an idiot," She retorted.
"You're not wrong," Dick agreed, "You shouldn't have pushed him like that."
"I was just trying to get him to listen," Wally defended.
"Yeah, and you did a great job of that," Artemis said sarcastically.
"Look, I'm sorry. I didn't think he'd hit me. I didn't think he'd react like that," Wally said.
"Clearly, you didn't think at all," Artemis said, her voice a bit softer.
"I'm sorry, okay. I didn't mean for any of this to happen," Wally said, his voice a mix of guilt and regret.
"We know, Wally. We're not mad at you. Well, except him," Dick said.
"We all want to see Conner move on and get better, Wally. But, there's a difference between helping him see the truth and berating him," Kaldur explained.
The speedster just nodded, before feeling Artemis and M'Gann nudge him away, "Come on, idiot. Let's get you to the Medbay so we can clean that lip. Man, you finally get knocked between your teeth, and I can't even say it wasn't from me or that it was justified. Way to ruin my day, dipshit."
"Aren't you just the loveliest," Wally replied sarcastically.
Dick, Kaldur, and Zatanna watched them walk off before turning toward each other.
"What are we going to do?"
"I don't know, Z. I really don't know," Dick answered.
"This is getting out of hand," Kaldur said, his voice a mix of worry and frustration, running a hand down his face.
"Maybe, we should try talking to him again," Zatanna suggested.
"If he reacts the same way he just reacted with Wally, I'd rather avoid it. I was fine with him taking his anger and frustration out on the bad guys, but him doing it to us is a different story," Dick said.
"I agree. We need to find a way to get through to him, and soon before his violent outburst gets worse," Kaldur stated.
"So, no more giving him space then?" Zatanna asked.
"Maybe not necessarily, we don't want to provoke him into open confrontation like Wally just did, but clearly, leaving him alone is only making the problem get worse because he's not acknowledging or dealing with his grief," Kaldur said.
"Agreed. The last thing we need is him going rogue," Dick said.
"Do you think he'd actually do that?" Zatanna asked, her voice a bit worried.
"I don't want to think that, but you've seen the way he's been looking and walking around lately and the one person who could actually get him to listen without being threatened by violence is more than likely buried somewhere. It's almost like being around a ticking time bomb, or worse, walking around someone who's possessed. Kal, tell me you weren't the least bit unsettled with the way he was just looking at us. Like there was nothing behind his eyes besides anger and death," Dick asked his Atlantean friend.
"I was," Kaldur answered, his voice a bit solemn.
"Me too," Zatanna said, her voice a bit quiet.
"Okay, so we're all in agreement. We need to figure out something, and we need to do it soon. Otherwise, the next person who pisses him off might not be so lucky," Dick said.
"Agreed." The two others said.
"Recording in progress. Project: E&D. Log #77..."
The three teens whipped around to the computer, seeing it play a recording none of them ever heard before. They each looked at each other weirdly while listening to the recording, each feeling a little bit unnerved.
"We still haven't found any concrete findings on the source of the subject's abilities, but we have made other fascinating discoveries. According to the parents of the subject, the abilities he displays now all came at different age points in his previous years. First was the enhanced durability, an ability shared by many notable metas and heroes. This power came about in his early childhood, not enough to raise alarms, but enough to have the parents rightfully suspicious."
A sick, ghostly feeling overcame the three teenagers as they realized what they were all listening to.
"Oh. My. God. This is about Y/N!" Zatanna stated.
"And, it's from the experiments Lex was performing on him. This must be from one of the scientists who were working on the project as well." Dick theorized.
"But, I thought Batman, Superman, and the League collected every piece of evidence and recording they could find from that place. We would know since Conner had us listen and watch every single piece of evidence we had in hopes of finding a clue to where he might be. I've never heard this one before," Kaldur pointed out.
The two other team members each shrugged at the Atlantean before they all went back to listening.
"Then, came the power of flight and energy manipulation in his teenage years, which led us to rule out Kryptonian biology after the inhuman speed he developed in his pre-teen years. Since energy manipulation has never been a known or recorded Kryptonian ability, it brought us back to the main three categories we had for the potential answer to the subject's source. But, this discovery along with the new data that's coming in from the tests we've been doing with the serums on his body, has led us to the conclusion that whatever gives the subject these different abilities is active and growing. If these were powers he developed in his early stages of life, it definitely leaves us to question if he will manifest other ones in the future as he ages and develops more."
"Wait, did that guy just say there's a possibility Y/N could grow to develop other powers in the future?"
"He sure did."
"Okay, but, what does any of that have to do with the explosion the day Y/N disappeared?"
"I don't know. But, I have a feeling we're about to find out," Kaldur said, his voice a bit grim.
"The most exciting part is we may have stumbled upon a new power completely by trial and error. After we discovered the unknown pathogen tampering with our serums, we had to reduce the potency and level of our experiments to eliminate any potential risk to the subject's health. But, we found that during one of the experiment sessions post-reduction, when the patient seemed to be under a lot of stress, especially after his conversation with Mr. Luthor, a slight startle from that dunderhead Martin seemingly caused the subject to teleport himself from one end of the room to the other, in theory away from the thing that startled him, i.e. the danger or stressor."
All of their eyes went wide.
"The subject now seems to have unlocked the power of teleportation!"
"Holy shit! Y/N can teleport?!"
"It would appear so, yes."
"With this new ability, the subject could virtually teleport themselves out of situations that pose any danger or stress to them. Imagine the possibilities. If the subject can learn to control and harness this power, it could be the key to the ultimate weapon against the Justice League and their allies. A secret agent, able to sneak into the most secure facilities and locations undetected and unseen. And, if they can't handle the mission, they can simply teleport themselves out of the situation. This is a breakthrough. Unfortunately, since this is an ability the subject unlocked while in a drug-induced state and was not aware of it post-test, Mr. Luthor has instructed no one to inform him of this development, nor does he want any testing of this ability until further notice. Since his discovery of the relationship between the subject and the still liberated Project: K.R., he's been very cagey about things but urging us to speed up our work, as if he's preparing for something. These brainwashed fools may listen to his every word, but I intend to get every piece of data I can from these experiments. Oh- someone's coming. I must end this log early. Grant out."
"Y/N can teleport," Zatanna said, her voice a bit soft.
Dick had a look of realization come over him, "That's why no one could find him. He wasn't vaporized or abducted. He teleported himself away," He said, his voice a mix of relief and realization.
"But, where did he go? And, why hasn't he come back yet?"
"I don't know, Z. But, the fact that we're even asking that question means—"
"Conner was right. Y/N is alive."
The two dark-haired teens turned to their Atlantean leader, who held a relieved but stern gaze over his face as he stared at the recording sitting open on the computer.
"Call Batman and Superman now."
Conner was walking along the beach with Wolf. He needed to get out of the Cave for a little bit, feeling a little bit guilty for how he reacted with Wally. It wasn't completely his fault though!
Wally shouldn't have been pushing his buttons so much. He was basically asking for it.
Either way, the Kryptonian knew he was going to have to apologize at some point. He knew his behavior was getting out of control, and he was aware of how his friends and teammates were starting to feel uneasy around him.
But, he couldn't help it.
All he could think about was Y/N and how much he loved him. How much he missed him back and how much he wanted him back.
He'd give anything to have him back, and he'd do anything to make that happen.
But, maybe his friends were right. Maybe he was chasing a lost dream and it was time for him to move on. Maybe it was time for him to accept the truth.
Conner looked down at the sand, the canine whining at his side as he could sense his human's sad distress, smelling the sad emotions all over him. He blinked repeatedly, trying to hold back the tears pooling in his eyes, but they just kept coming before they were eventually dripping and falling into the sand on the beach.
"I'm sorry, boy. I'm trying. I'm really trying," Conner said, his voice a bit broken.
Wolf barked softly, nudging his head into his human's leg with another whine.
"I know, buddy. I miss him too," Conner said, his voice a bit softer, running his hand across the canine's fur, though he seemed to be poking his snout up at a scent he caught on the wind, his tail wagging back and forth excitedly.
The silence over the beach was so loud, but not louder than the Kryptonian's soft sniffles as he stared out over the water, pulling the folded-up photo out of his pocket. Despite his overwhelming mournful attitude, he couldn't help the small smile that crossed his lips as he stared at the photo of himself, Y/N, and their friends at the beach. The same day he told Y/N he was a clone.
The same day he confessed his feelings for him.
Tears were falling onto the photo.
"I'm sorry," Conner whispered, his voice a bit broken.
"You know, you really need to stop apologizing so much."
Conner's head shot up.
There was no way. It wasn't possible.
Wolf suddenly shot away from his side, barking happily before the sound of him tackling someone to the ground hit the Kryptonian's eardrums.
There was no fucking way. It couldn't be possible.
He turned around slowly, to see the canine licking the face of the person he was currently lying on top of.
"Okay! Wolf, Sweet Jesus, okay! I missed you too, buddy," Y/N or at least someone that had Y/N's body laughed, his voice a bit muffled from his arms trying to cover his face as the canine tried to lick him.
Conner inched a bit closer, scared out of his mind to take too big of a step and risk the sight in front of him disappearing like an illusion. It'd be really ironic and bittersweet if he was to be actually losing his mind at this moment.
"Y/N?" Conner muttered softly under his breath.
When the smaller figure finally managed to get the excited canine off of him, he uncovered his face looking up at the Kryptonian before smiling that same infectious smile that had Conner's heart spiking and his eyes watering even more than they were before, mirroring the same watery eyes staring back at him.
Y/N slowly stood up, looking at his Conner with red eyes, doing his best to hold in his own tears, "Did ya miss me?"
"Is it really you?" The taller boy asked, still 100% not trusting that he wasn't losing his mind and this wasn't a product of his overly emotional state. This is why it was so much easier to keep shit bottled in.
Y/N didn't say anything for a moment, just staring at him leading Conner to think he really was hallucinating or sleep-walking until he opened his arms toward the Kryptonian, "Open arms?"
Realization hit him and before he even knew what he was doing, the Kryptonian felt his feet moving on their own and his arms were wrapped tightly around his boyfriend, holding him close and tight, almost afraid to let him go.
"Don't you ever leave me again," Conner whispered, his voice a bit broken.
"I won't. I promise," Y/N replied, his voice very broken.
But for the first time in a long time, the young hero finally felt comfortable. He finally felt like he could let his guard down after so long, feeling safe in the arms of his lover.
"I love you, Conner."
"I love you too, Y/N."
They sat just like that for a while, holding each other and finally basking in each other's presence again, "So does forever start now?" Y/N asked through a small sob.
Conner smiled through his own tears, comforting his boyfriend like he used to.
"Yeah, it starts now."
☀️ | Conner Kent/Superboy | ☀️
☀️ | Masterlists | ☀️
#solar-wing ☀️#☀️🪽.fanfic#☀️🪽.dcposts#☀️🪽.request#☀️🪽.txt#gay#angst#comfort#dc#dcu#dcau#dc universe#dc comics#young justice#dc x reader#dc x male reader#x reader#x male reader#conner kent#conner kent x reader#conner kent x male reader#conner kent x m!reader#superboy#superboy x reader#superboy x male reader#superboy x m!reader
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After the inevitable conflict between Lyric and Myrah mom ends their family dinner, Mel visits his old stomping grounds. The only good thing to come out of his parent's divorce as a child was moving to San Sequoia and meeting his friends and future wife. He really can't imagine his life without his tribe.
prev / next
Bonus: NOOOOO absolutely not
Loren: Hello?
Mel: Hey, Loren.
Loren: Hey.
Mel: Guess where I am.
Loren: Beats me. Where are you?
Mel: We used to loiter at the old pier when we were kids—me, you, and Aiden. Our rounds of tic-tac-toe and hangman are still etched into the old, rotten wood. Aiden didn’t know how to spell Mila Kunis and spelled it Mila Kunes, so we were playing for like an hour trying to figure out what the hell the word was. [chuckles] Remember?
Loren: Yeah. I remember, Mel.
Mel: Yeah...
Mel: Listen... I wanted to call because we haven’t talked about what happened.
Loren: I really don’t know what to say.
Mel: No, I know. I just- I wanted you and Maeve to know how sorry we are about all of this. You know we raised Selene better than that, and it really surprised and disappointed us.
Loren: We were disappointed too.
Loren: As a parent, you prepare for the big heartbreak, but I never imagined it would hurt like this. We’re having to rebuild our daughter from the ground up. It’s devastating. She didn’t deserve that.
Mel: I know. I feel so awful...
Loren: [sighs] You didn’t do anything, Mel. Selene is an adult, and she made a choice. A fucked-up one, but a choice nonetheless, and now we process and we move on.
Mel: Selene’s dropping from the tour.
Loren: Zoey would hate that. Despite everything, she would still want Selene to compete. At least to kick her ass, anyway.
Mel: Zoey’s an amazing young woman. You and Maeve did a great job.
Loren: Selene’s a good kid, too. A dumbass, but good. I don’t hate her. I love her like she’s my own. I just need her to work through her shit.
Mel: And are we still cool?
Loren: Yesss, Starboy. We’re cool. But if your daughter comes within 10 feet of mine, I’m going to kick her and your ass—at least for now.
Mel: Understood.
Loren: I love you, Mel. You and Nina are our family, always, ok? Anyway, I’m going to turn in for the night. Talk to you later-
Mel: Wait, there’s one more thing! My mom married a man half her age and didn’t tell anyone.
Loren: Fucking Myrah! [laughs]
Mel: Ok, there’s another. Olive is doing the same thing, except it’s a rich milf or something?
Loren: How many times do I have to tell you and Aiden, they’re not Milfs when they’re our age.
Mel: [chuckles] Night Loren.
Nina: Hey, you. Ready to head back to the hotel?
Mel: Yeah, but sit with me first. I just got off the phone with Loren. We were talking about Selene.
Nina: How’d that go?
Mel: We’re good. Just wish our kids were. I feel like the twins don’t think they can come and talk to us anymore.
Nina: Or maybe they’re in their 20s and they think they have it all figured out. Sounds familiar?
Mel: Is it really the same thing over and over?
Nina: But this time, we’re going to make sure we’re listening. If there’s anything I learned about your mother and Lyric, it’s that our children will always want to be heard. We should give them that when they’re ready to speak.
Mel: You always know what to say.
Nina: I learned by loving you.
Mel: Off subject but...remember that thing I said I always wanted to do?
Nina: Mel. It’s like...11pm at night.
Mel: Come onnn, nobody’s around. It’ll be quick.
Nina: Once you get started, you never want to stop.
Mel: We’ll use a safe word. The moment you want to stop, we’ll stop.
Nina: Just be gentle. We’re not in our 20s anymore.
Mel: We’ll go nice and slow.
Mel: [panting] See? That wasn’t so bad.
Nina: [breathlessly] Easy... for you to say...what happened to nice and slow?
Mel: Want to go again?
Nina: ...yeah, but hurry before someone calls the police. [laughs]
Mel: Hold on tight.
Nina: [squeals] Wait! I’m slipping!!
Mel: I said hold on! I’m gonna do a big spin.
Nina: OK! OK! Go!
#missing moments#the briar legacy#sims 4 simblr#sims 4 stories#ts4 simblr#sims 4 community#sims 4 screenshots#sims 4 legacy
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Delicious? (Part1?)
Aka story of Raphael and his mysterious taste bud
I don't know what I did, I just wanna try my hand on writing and this is an.. fever idea ig
I already wrote more but ermm yea will need some more time to finish it
Raphael was always an easy child, you told him to sit there, he sat, you told him to go to bed, he went. Even with food, he was also easy, he doesn't have any preference or hatred towards food. He eat veggies, fruits, any meats with no complaints.
The little angel was in the middle of flying lesson when the most easy and/or awkward question for a kid. He stared at two pots of soups, they smelled a little different from each other. "Which soup would you like?"
“It would be all the same to me, you can let the other choose first” he said, sure enough smell wouldn't change taste
“Awww what a kind little angel you are, Raphael” the older angel reached and pet him on his head. He liked it.
.
.
.
Raphael took a bite of the soup that was left for him, it's plain, bland, and didn't make any difference from other soup he had tried for all his life. The angel, his age, letting him try the other soup, seemed like she didn't like it and wanted to know if he liked this more and traded it.
It's the same, he couldn't tell what was different.
He agreed to trade it anyway.
.
Evening came, Raphael told his attendant what he did that day. Simeon, as always, smiled back at him and said “That's so nice of you, Raph.”
He paused, Raphael thought it wasn't bad to get compliments from such easy action.
“But I guess, I should find what your favorite food is, huh?” with chuckles, Simeon started to name random dishes while going to the kitchen and made them dinner. His wings moved while walking, always brought his attention away. "Oh I should make that today, what do you think about.."
He sure he would liked everything Simeon made for him.
"that's sounds nice" but maybe not as that sandwich the other day
But again, it's too bland on his tongue
“How is it?” Simeon asked him half of the meal
Raphael couldn't remember the name of what he'd just eaten.
He swallowed. “It's good”
.
Simeon said he misread the recipes and asked if he wanted him to make something real quick for his lunch today. "I should have wondered how all those ingredients never went well together, I'm so sorry Raph"
As a young angel at that time, he said "it's fine and I should get going to the training, I will take it, thanks"
Raphael ate it, the bread, the mistake of fruit jam, the strong spiced meat and some vegetables. He liked it. Everyone there knew Simeon was his guardian, and always wanted to try his food.
Of course he didn't mind, even though it's the first time he thought this is what delicious tasted like and wanted to have it all to himself.
The other angels took a bite with so much hope, especially after seeing him with such sparkly eyes.
But then they made a weird noise and said it wasn't any good as the rumor said.
“This is too salty!” they wailed
“Ugh the bad taste still on my tongue”
“Is the fruit he used rotten?!”
They whimpered about how bad it was, asking if he misunderstood the word delicious. Raphael didn’t think so, because if it's not delicious that means he wouldn't like it.
But he likes his food this way, so it's delicious. That's what he thought.
He felt some rage bubbling inside him, he didn't have any preference about other Simeon’s food but he knew that he's a great chef.
“Don't say that, you shouldn't judge it by just one time” he paused, didn't know how to describe what Simeon's food usually taste like, not even what he ate for breakfast. “He just busy and misread the ingredients this time”
It's true that's why he accepted this mistake of food in the first place, he didn't want to put any more loads of work onto archangel.
And it worked. They backed down, went back to enjoy their own lunch.
.
.
The next day they asked him to share again and agree that the food from his guardian was delicious after just one bite.
Leaving him missed that unique taste of jam with yet another bland taste.
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i think i figured out why ROR songs feel so...un-descendants
its all ONE genre? i suppose? like its either rap, trapp, or pop, meanwhile the first 3 descendants movies had like-20 different music genres in just the first movie-they had kinda a dubstep vibe for the opening song 'rotten to the core', then a broadway musical type song for 'evil like me' because how were they not going to use Kristin chenoweth's vovcals? , if only was a ballad, then be our guest was a fun throwback/callback song that they made...a cheesy white boy rap for some reason, they had another ballad with the if only reprise, and then set it was the big finale pop song, like-as a whole descendants music is considered pop apparently but they had like-hundreds of different type of songs in just the first movie, like they all sound simular but in a good way.
D2 starts off with a full pop rock song, ways to be wicked, and goes into whats my name which google defines as 'pop, R&B, electrohop, and pop rap', then into a -kinda old stylish pop song 'chillin like a villain', then into the ballad space between, which goes into the finale song 'you and me' which is my personal favorite of the finale songs which gives kinda...musical finale vibes-which is great!
D3, starts off with Good to be bad which honestly, years later-is such a banger song, i love it, i did the 'confused head nods' to it at first but now i love it, its grown on me, and its a pop song, of course, but its got such a big energy to it that it feels like its a broadway musical song, then of course-the powerful 'queen of mean' which google describes as a trap-pop song, but it feels so different from good to be bad in the best way, then we go into 'do what you gotta do' which is a pop-rock duet between Mal, a pop singer, and Hades, a washed up rock star-and it gives kinda...80s-90s jazz/rock vibes, it feels different from the rest of the songs but still fits within the line up, then night-falls; this ones practically full rap with sung verses, mainly from Evie, Mal and Uma, with the boys only rap-singing-i think this is the weakest song of D3, but it still sounds right with the rest of the sound track, then Evie's solo-one kiss, which ofc is a pop song, but then comes the big song-Mal's ballad, once upon a time. no autotune, pure genuine music; just Mal and the lyrics and the music, honestly-i loved once upon a time, still do, i think its a good song theory wise-story wise? it flumps on actually making Mal take accountability for her actions-like it tries and it fails, low-key sounds like Mal is trying to gaslight herself XD(joke) anyway-strong ballad, its followed by 'break this down' which is-wowza-you can FEEL this is the big finale song of the series, it goes all out on choreo, the singing, the set, the music-all of it. again it feels like a musical finale song you'd see on stage-its so fucking good.
and then ror...opens with...idk pop? then...goes into pop-trap-rap....then another pop-rap song...then a pop song...then a pop song....then ...k-pop-rap esqe song? and then like a kinda...ballad reprise of the earlier pop song? the songs of ror all sound the same, there's no proper-change in any of the songs, they all sound the same and put too much emphasis on telling the story with the SONGs instead of the songs HELPING tell the story, there's no ballad, there's no big 'fun musical stage type' song, there's not even a finale song, it feels so separated/wong because it doesn't follow the guidelines the first 3 movies put in place. the songs are hardly fun too, like-the chorses are good, the verses all needed several more drafts, and the choreo is weak sauce-they're just trying to make tik tok dances, not musical dances
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The Last Night
Summary: Learning about grief on the roof of the headquarters with a stranger was the last thing Levi expected to be on his yearly bingo card.
Warnings: Soldier!Levi x Fem!Soldier!Reader. Set after ACWNR. Angst. Smoking (don't fuck up your lungs, please), swearing, mentions of death. SFW!
No Regrets hurts me 'til this day, I just wanna hug soldier! Levi so bad. Ididn'tentirelylikethisbutohwell.
The smell of tobacco reached your nostrils everytime you pushed the smoke out past your lips, leaving a warm, tingly feeling dancing in your tongue. The chilling night engulfed your figure with its dark wrap, moonlight highlighting your skin.
Your feet dangled off the edge, heels of your boots lightly kicking against the wall under.
It was a lonely place, really. Barely anyone bothered to check up on the horse's cellar, as it was all full of hay and stinky horse-shit stains. It was the best hiding spot you found on your first year as a scout, and a great option to get away with smoking.
You were lost in tought while looking at the stars above you, recognizing a few constellations one of your roommates had told you about, when the sound of the door flying open made you jump in place, startled.
Your heart dropped to the pit of your stomach for a second, thinking that you had been caught by one of your superiors, or even a soldier who would've definetly snitched on you.
Instead, all you heard was a male scream, followed by constant kicks against the rotten—intended to be used for a fireplace, but ruined by rain—wooden planks laying forgotten on the floor.
He hadn't noticed you staring, full-on focusing on getting his foot impaled. Or so it looked like. He grunted with every hit, teeth gritting with anger.
"You'll break them into dust in no time." You laughed, sarcastic, lit cigarette staying between your index and middle finger. You weren't looking his way when he turned to the sound of your voice, body stiffening more than ever.
His chest moved with every rapid breath he took, struggling to get the air into his lungs. His frown deepened at both the fact you were making fun of him and daring to smoke on the job.
"You're one of the newbies, right?" Your eyes finally locked with his, filled with curiosity. "Erwin brought you here a few days ago, didn't he?" You took another long drag of smoke, enjoying the flavor on your taste buds for a good minute before parting your lips to let it vanish in the air.
He blinked once, twice. Lips curling with uneasiness. He closed one hand into a fist he tightened a few times, deciding on what to do.
"I heard what happened on your first mission. A shame, really." Your words came out muffled by the rolled piece of paper in your mouth, hands busy brushing back the strands of hair hitting your face.
He didn't talk, gulping once you raised an eyebrow at him. He hadn't talked to any other soldier since he first joined, spending every break alone. The only people who he got along with had died miserably in a place they didn't wish to be put in.
It sounded familiar to you.
"You can stay here if that's what you need, just don't throw shit my way. Don't worry about getting caught, nobody ever really comes up here." You shrugged your shoulders, turning back to admire the view you had grown so used to.
There were a few lights seeping out from bedroom and office windows. The biggest, and brighter one, belonging to the Commander's office. It seemed to rarely go out, as Erwin went by the whole night filling paperwork.
You heard light, shuffling sounds to your right, where the man had sat down in a pose similar to yours. One of his legs dangled down the roof, the other propped up for his forearm to rest against his knee.
He had a pretty side profile. His features where sharp, high cheekbones reflecting the moonlight. He had a nicely defined jawline and an undercut that suited his straight, raven hair.
The frown was pretty much permanent on his face, going all the way down to his lips. His smoky eyes didn't have the natural glow everybody else's did.
"Has your family ever died on a mission?" His voice was deeper than you thought, making your head snap towards him.
"Excuse me?" Family. Nobody was dumb enough to get themselves involved in the outside world, let alone people who had a somewhat decent job near Wall Rose.
He gulped again, still refusing to turn and look at you. The side of one of his hands pressed against the cobble under you, avoiding to touch the ground entirely.
"Have you ever lost...family, friends, while being here? He asked again, in a lower volume. He let out a shaky breath, looking up towards the moon.
"We all have. We all will." The last bit of ash fell on your pants, staining them grey, as your cigarette consumed itself away. You pressed the bud to the ground, making it blink dead.
"You can't really expect somebody to survive. Every night prior to a mission is full of silent goodbyes. Just in case."
"How did you deal with it?"
You took the pack of cigarettes out from the inside of your leather jacket, opening it up and offering one to him. His eyes shifted to the box, trailing up to yours.
He reluctantly took one, rolling it in between his long fingers.
You placed a new rolled paper on your mouth, enjoying the excuse to smoke another one. You lit up one of the many matches you always had on yourself, holding it close to your mouth and later moving it closer to him. He leaned in, waiting for the tail of his cigarette to catch in fire and start burning the leaves inside.
You shook your hand to turn off the match before the warmth reached your fingerpads.
"I didn't. I got used to living with the grief."
His movements stopped, lips parted, about to inhale the smoke. His eyes widened before breaking eye contact.
"There's not much you can do anyway, right?" You laughed, dry. "I mean- whether we cry ourselves to sleep or not, they aren't gonna come back." You cleared your throat after speaking, feeling the warm smoke reach the back of your tongue and drying your mouth.
'They were also able to leave this shitty world behind before it all got worse than we could ever imagine', you tought .
"What do you do then?"
"Remember them." Your answer was almost immediate. "I believe that forgetting someone is the only way they can truly die. Until then, they are alive in us and our memories."
It was weird opening up so much to somebody you had never spoken to before, but you weren't hating it. The both of you were in clear need of help.
He didn't say anything after that, calmly finishing his cigarette as midnight dawned upon you both. He got up an dusted his clothes off, standing a bit closer to you.
You were so lost in thought counting the stars, that you only heard him halfway through telling you something.
"Hm?" You looked up at him, blinking your eyes a few times.
"Levi. The name's Levi." He repeated.
Right. He had said it the morning Erwin introduced the trio to the corps.
"Y/N." You replied with a small side-smile before he left through the door he had kicked open just hours back, telling you to not get caught.
You didn't expect him to be there the week after. Nor three nights after that. And you never thought he'd beat you to the roof one time, sitting next to two porcelain cups steaming with tea.
"What's that for?" You chuckled, making him turn around to face you.
"Sit your ass down and drink it. You're gonna leave that nasty habit of yours and relax your body with something else." He reached for one of the cups, comfortably holding it by the rim. He nodded his head towards the other one, signaling you to take it.
And so you did. You sat criss-crossed besides him, a further back from the edge of the roof.
You rolled your eyes and huffed with a smile when he immediately snatched the pack of cigarettes as soon as you took it out. He placed them on the other side of his body, where you weren't gonna be able to reach them.
You hummed after sipping on the tea. It was black leaves mixed with a faint taste of honey and berries. It didn't taste bad at all, it was even more enjoyable than tobacco.
"Can I still do it when I'm too stressed tho?" You asked him, your voice resonating on the porcelain close to your lips.
"As long as you give me one." He shrugged.
Levi never told you how he actually preferred the cigarettes from outside rather than the ones from the underground, as they were always too dry and sometimes even racid.
He never spoke about how night was the favorite part of his day; not because he could look at the moon, but because he got to talk to you with no one else around. (And it absolutely wasn't because of how damn pretty he thought you looked under the moonlight).
And he would absolutely never tell you how you were the only person he could stand in the entirety of corps, just because 'that is not like him' .
He also never told you about how he was able to cope a little better with not only his friends, but his mother's death, after talking to you; and that was the last night he ever felt lonely.
#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman#aot#snk#snk levi#shingeki no kyojin#attack on titan#levi x reader#levi x you#levi x y/n#levi ackerman x you#levi ackerman x female reader#aot x reader#snk x reader#attack on titan x reader#shingeki no kyojin x reader
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hey👋 how do you think varg got so insane and have you seen that interview with his mom? she claimed he was normal growing up
He had always been insane lol.
Yes, I've seen that video, it's quite underrated but it tells a lot about the way that he grew up.
If 'insane' means malignant narcissist, then there are two theories known of that can be brought into discussion. Narcissistic tendencies develop in very early childhood as a coping mechanism when a child is mistreated and emotionally neglected. When I say mistreated, I mean physically abused and/or being spoiled rotten (yes, this is also abuse because you steal your child the chance of living in the real world by treating him/her special, affirming that he's/she's entitled to everything and anything, denying him/her consequences from his actions etc. etc.), and when I say emotionally neglected, I also include emotional inconsistency given by the parents (the mother usually). This means the child is most likely to walk on eggshells, completely unable to predict the parental response to a mistake that he/she makes.
In Varg's case, I see a combination of both things.
He has bitter feelings towards his father that sometimes slip out and we all can see that while he still has a 'great relationship' with his mother.
Hypothetically speaking, if his father was harsh with him while growing up, his mother spoiled him rotten to 'make up' for the damage. This type of treatment would render him very furious (on his father), but also very entitled to what his mother has to offer in return. This already sounds like him lol, doesn't it?
Following this hypothesis, it goes much deeper. While being childishly angry at his father, splitting his parents in 'all good or all bad', he can never see his mother as being equally abusive by building up the very false idea that 'what I can materially offer you, can compensate for everything that your father say/does'. So, he cannot be mad at his mother because that would mean that he is not treated right by not one, but both parents, and this is extremely threatening for him. Therefore, his mother will always be his savior, the one and only 'Madonna', so to speak. This is the archetype that narcissists look for in their romantic partner and needless to say, his wife occupies the role of a perfect mother who never punishes him, never show him that he is wrong, enables his flawed and delusional behavior, etc.
I don't believe for a second when his mother said to the camera that she 'never saw any signs that he would end up doing what he did', telling the interviewer that Varg had always been 'a sweet little boy that wouldn't get in trouble' and all that stuff because there are always signs, absolutely always. You don't just go out of the blue to burn down churches. This type of behaviour doesn't install overnight. You always start with small, miniscule offends, and you build up your courage to go further and further. And I won't even start on how arson is , in most cases, the number one offence preferred by juveniles. So, there must have been signs, but of course that admitting this to the camera would put her in a bad light and it would be threatening for her image. But lying is lying. I know I cannot prove that she's lying in any way, neither I cannot disprove that she is lying, but look at what her son did and judge for yourself.
She seems highly narcissistic to me. I won't comment on her look, but she seems very preoccupied with how she presents herself.. I will leave you with this. The way she speaks is very light compared to the gravity of the subject and there are many more things that I could point out, but this answer would be too long.
Anyway, considering that Varg ended up like this, it's very likely that he experienced a lot of emotional inconsistency from his emotionally 'Dead Mother' (I will use Andre Green's terminology because it suits her well) and a harsh, unemotional, unavailable treatment from his father.
The fact that his parents divorced is also a big indicator of incompatibility, which will leave an everlasting mark on their children. (thing that happened with Per Ohlin also in his own case)
Now Varg talks nicely about his family on Twitter and in his books because, like all narcissists, he has to maintain a fantasy that he had it all perfect, that he is the product of a wonderful marriage that never ever went wrong and other delusions like this that will help him sleep better at night. Reality is hard and cruel and we all know that Varg is 'too privileged' to live in the real world and realize the contemporary mockery that became.
It is very possible that his parents persuaded him and his brother to be in competition with one another, stirring up even more envy in Varg and adding layers to his inferiority complex. We might never know for sure, but we can observe the direction in which Varg (possibly the family's 'scapegoat') went.
Again, the fact that he talks nicely in his books about all of his family is nothing but smoke and mirrors because he has to sell a certain image to his audience.
This is extremely long, but I can't be succinct when coming to psychology lol. That's my take.
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Flufftober 2024 - 9 Bane
There were many things about the "modern" world that Bane didn't understand since he met Y/N and often visited her in Gotham.
That didn't mean he hated it, just that he didn't understand, after all this time in the Pit then with the League, and that he was too proud and stubborn to say when he loved it, because it wouldn't go with his speech about how rotten the world was.
He still had to hide his fascination when he asked a lot of questions about birthdays, Christmas, Valentine's Day, and now Halloween.
Y/N had been trying to explain to him for several minutes what the best celebration was, but it was obvious that he was grimacing under his mask.
"… Why do you think it's the best ?"
"I just explained it to you, Bane."
"You told me that children went out alone in the street to ask strangers for sweets while being disguised as people who don't exist, allowed to vandalize the houses of those who didn't respond favorably, risking being kidnapped and gorging themselves on candies that are bad for their health."
"… Of course, it doesn't sound great when you summarize it like that. But adults go the children, they don't have the right to vandalize, and often the candies are not all eaten at the same time."
"Hmm." Bane growled, still not convinced.
"Besides, adults can also have fun like I told you."
"By drinking way too much alcohol and waking up in situations that are as avoidable as they are tragic."
"You're saying that because of last night's horror movie, it's less crazy and bloody in real life, I promise you ! Trust me."
No, really, the explanations given did not allow Bane to give a favorable opinion on Halloween.
However, he had blind faith in Y/N, as much as he wanted to make her happy. So if she liked this holiday, he would not criticize it too much.
For a moment, his eyes would let out a hint of interest when she spoke to him about spending the whole evening together, her with a rather revealing disguise, watching television. He refused to admit it, but he liked television. And maybe her in costumes, but just maybe.
But the glow disappeared when she spoke of going out on the street.
"Since everyone will be disguised, you will not need to hide your mask with a scarf for once. We will be able to walk quietly."
"Some hidden in the shadows could see me, take advantage of it. It is not a good idea."
"Oh." sighed Y/N, disappointed. "We go out together so rarely. I do not like you being locked up all the time when you visit me."
"I've been to prison, Habibi. I'm not locked up when I'm with you."
"Aw, Bane."
"And… I don't like the idea of all these people looking at you and trying to take you from me."
It wasn't that important to her to get out, she was too old for trick-or-treating, and if Bane felt more comfortable staying in the apartment, then she wasn't going to push it.
They would have a good time, looking for a horror movie that would finally make the giant ninja jump a little. So far, all the ones they had seen had simply perplexed him.
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Rip of the week: 21/10/2024
Through the Bad Apples!!
Season 8 No Album Release Bad Apple!! (UK Version) - Touhou 4: Lotus Land Story
Ripped by Ellie53 (@ellie53real)
youtube
While the SiIvaGunner channel comes with a lot of repeating gags and bits, the ways in which they employ these can vary a fair bit. The channel's foundational meme, the ever-present funny Flintstone man Grand Dad which I wrote about on Waluigi Pinball (Beta Mix), is a simple leitmotif of just 15 notes, which makes it incredibly flexible; it can be employed as a standalone joke as practice for greenhorn rippers, or be wormed into the middle of more complex project. Memes like We Are Number One meanwhile have a very funny sound to them, yet require a lot of time and care to get to sound as good as rips like Robbie's Rotten Mine or Ska Cha Cha (Rotten Mix). And then, on the side of the spectrum completely opposite to Grand Dad, we have the jokes that feel more like a complete and total flex on the part of the ripper employing them. These "bits" are the ones that aren't necessarily reoccurring due to being funny, but rather due to being bangers with a complexity inherent to their composition, which makes any rip employing them feel like a big event. The main example would be Final Fantasy VII's One Winged Angel as featured on rips like I will Never be a Redneck, yet perhaps just as impressive are rips utilizing Dragonforce's legendary Through the Fire and Flames; rips like, indeed, Through the Bad Apples!!.
Made legendary through Guitar Hero III, Through the Fire and Flames is a song known far and wide across the internet; a piece of mainstream music that pierces through to the most shut-in of nerds due to the gaming legacy tied to it. It was the ultimate challenge for play in the ultimate Guitar Hero release, an absolutely unmissable part of pop culture of the 7th generation of gaming, and of course an absolute shredding banger in its own right. It's a natural fit for the SiIvaGunner channel, and ever since around ~Season 5 or so it's seen a pretty notable uptick in appearances - you may remember my writing of the legendary Through the F-F-Fire and the F-F-Flames, championing its ripper for his incredible ambitions and efforts made to make the rip feel as complete as it does. Its the typical fun of SiIvaGunner arrangement rips, the age-old question of how to transfer one song's intensity into the framework of a different song or video game's sound; Float Islands (Kirby 64 Arrangement), FEEL SO FINE STUCK INSIDE, and of course medley rips like SNES Mini Circulation all show just why it's such an appealing prospect. And so, we've seen a fair few rips aiming to do just what Through the F-F-Fire and the F-F-Flames did: take the legendary song and rearrange it in the style of a different game.
In large part, that is what Through the Bad Apples!! also does to great effect, imbuing the track with the distinct sound of the Touhou franchise. You can read the entries on W.E. Are Number One? and Beautiful! ~ Curveball of Sean Kingston to learn more about it, but to keep it concise it's a sound that I very much admire and enjoy despite having very little knowledge of the Touhou series as a whole. One Touhou song I'm most DEFINITELY aware of, however, is Bad Apple!! - perhaps the series' most virally spread anthem, and one that I officially fell in love with all the way back in Season 3 of SiIvaGunner through Imperial Touwer. It is, in many ways, a song just as legendary and known to the video game mainstream - if not moreso - as Through the Fire and Flames. And so, in some sense, it was only logical for Through the Bad Apples!! to instead flip things on its head.
Indeed, the rip isn't an arrangement of the Dragonforce track kept to the soundscape of Touhou 4; uniquely, it's instead the other way around, an arrangement of Bad Apple!! using the instrumental sound of Through the Fire and Flames. Upon relistening to Through the Fire and Flames a few times before writing this post, I had forgotten just how video game-y the original track actually already sounds, with a chirpy synth accentuating several key moments of the performance that just oozes 90s video games. As a result, the two tracks feel closer to one another than you'd once think; and Through the Bad Apples!! as a result manages to feel less like a straight interpretation of one into the other, and more like an even blend of the two sounds.
I'm yet to cover much of what Ellie53 has done on SiIvaGunner before this post, but she's been a constant presence on the channel since the tail end of Season 5, no doubt soon becoming aware of the rising prominence of Through the Fire and Flames rips. She's also tinkered around with Bad Apple!! in particular with Maçã Ruim!! back in Season 7; and so, I suppose it only makes sense that one would eventually put the pieces together and try their hand at mixing the two into one. Through the Bad Apples!! feels WELL worth the wait and is a shining example of Ellie53's growth as a ripper, and I'm hopeful that Through the Fire and Flames sticking around on SiIvaGunner for the foreseeable future can continue to inspire rippers just like Ellie53 to keep finding new ways to experiment with its sound.
Long live Dragonforce!
#todays siivagunner#season 8#siivagunner#siiva#Ellie53#Youtube#tentative rip name#dragonforce#touhou project#touhou#guitar hero#guitar hero 3#rhythm games#bad apple#Bandcamp
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Dorcas stares as pink and red confetti starts falling over Evan’s head. They’re currently seated at the Slytherin table in the Great Hall, eating breakfast, and it happens to be Valentine’s Day.
“Looks like you’ve got a secret admirer,” Dorcas tells him, eyebrows raised in mirth. Her fork is paused halfway between her plate and her mouth, food forgotten in favor of poking fun.
Evan’s surprised and somewhat confused expression turns into a frown as he starts swiping at the confetti, which has gotten thicker and has started to fall much more frequently.
“Yeah,” he replies, hands swatting around his head, “because it’s such a big secret as to who it is.” He sends a meaningful look to Barty, who’s seated just left of him.
In response to that accusation, Barty simply grins and says in an unconvincingly innocent voice, “Don’t look at me, I have no idea who would do such a thing.”
“Right,” Evan says, “because you’d never do such a thing in your life. Showering me in confetti just sounds so unlike your subtle touch. Wish my “secret admirer” would send me chocolate instead of all this confetti, though.”
Barty lifts his hands in a “don’t-mind-me” gesture, shaking his head slightly. It might have been a slightly more convincing act if he hadn’t had a shit-eating grin plastered to his face. “Still don’t know what you’re looking at me for, though.”
There’s a sudden burst of laughter from Dorcas. Traces of her amusing are evident on her face as she looks back towards Evan and says, “Yeah, well, I personally can’t blame you for wanting chocolate instead of a cloud of confetti. You better hope that thing doesn’t follow you around all day.”
“I’ll keep my fingers crossed for chocolate,” Evan promises, shooting a dirty look at Barty before mumbling a quick “Finite incantatem” at the confetti.
Oddly enough, the counter jinx isn’t enough to stop the flow of red and pink. The continued falling of confetti despite his best efforts causes Evan to huff a defeated sigh and simply give up. He goes back to eating his breakfast, not bothering to ask Barty how to get the confetti to stop, because he knows that Barty will deny knowing anything. Sometimes, Evan thinks that his boyfriend is going to be the death of him.
Thankfully, however, the confetti stops once he’s walked out of the Great Hall, step in step with Barty as they head to their upcoming class.
“It’s stopped,” Evan comments as soon as he’s noticed the absence of red and pink, looking up in disbelief. “How’d you do that?”
“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” Barty says, smiling up at the ceiling.
Evan simply shakes his head at Barty’s antics, then grabs his hand and drags him off to class.
Their classes leading up until lunch pass without incident, thankfully. Well, without a Valentine’s Day related incident, at least. (Not without any accidents entirely, because one of the Hufflepuff girls was so bad a casting a certain spell that it caused the Charms room to be filled with the smell of rotten eggs, but luckily the odor dissipated after only a minute or two).
So, after the incident in Charms, Barty and Evan find themselves walking to the Great Hall for lunch, trying to get the smell of rotten eggs out of their noses. As they walk together, Evan has the feeling that it’s almost past time for his “secret admirer” to strike again. His gaze slides to Barty, but Barty’s expression gives nothing away—good or bad.
Walking into the Great Hall does nothing to stop Evan’s growing apprehension (though the smell of lunch food does help with the egg problem), and he looks up to see if the cloud of confetti has returned. To Evan’s relieved surprise, it hasn’t.
Off to his left comes a small laugh, no doubt Barty realizing why Evan suddenly looked up at the ceiling. Evan nudges him with his elbow to get him to stop, but it doesn’t have the intended effect. Rather, Barty simply drags them closer to Slytherin table, then plops down at his usual spot.
Evan, however, remains standing, eyeing his seat warily.
“What?” Barty says playfully, noticing Evan’s hesitation, “It’s not like it’s going to bite or anything.”
“Right, but you’ll excuse me if I’m a little worried it might turn my hair pink, or something as equally ridiculous.”
Barty’s laugh is easily forthcoming, and mischief dances in his eyes as he says, “Well, if it’ll make you feel better, you can always sit on my lap instead.”
He pats his lap invitingly, but Evan opts to simply sit on the wooden bench. No need to cause a scene at the lunch table, right?
Thankfully, his hair does not turn pink, and nothing out of the ordinary happens for the entirety of lunch.
No, the next gift from his admirer becomes evident only after he’s finished eating, as Evan goes to pick his bag back up.
Somehow, over the course of one lunch, its contents have managed to triple in weight. So Evan looks down into his bag to see what caused the sudden change, then shoots an incredulous glance towards Barty. Barty’s still working on finishing his food and is steadfastly ignoring what is happening to the right of him. But the fact that the corner of his mouth has turned up into a smirk gives him away instantly.
“Barty,” Evan calls to get him to look over, a sarcastic tint coloring his words, “you want some chocolate, by any chance?”
He turns his bag to Barty, opening it up. Barty doesn’t look at all surprised to see a multitude of wrapped chocolates filling the bag up to the brim, and his expression is gleeful as he chirps out a mischievous “Sure!” and takes a chocolate.
Unwrapping it, he pops it into his mouth and smiles at Evan as he chews. “You know,” he says, after having finished it, “this admirer of yours is incredibly smart. They even got you your favorite type of chocolate and everything.”
Evan raises his eyebrows at him. “Yeah, he must be incredibly wise to do such a thing.”
“Now now, Evan,” Barty cuts in, waggling a finger at Evan. “You mustn’t assume that this secret admirer is a guy, you know. It could be anyone.”
“Whatever you say, dearest,” Evan replies, then gets up and blows a kiss at Barty, walking backwards before turning around to go meet up with Pandora.
-
From there, everything is normal. Barty is his usual flirty self, the castle is decked out in pink and red, and Evan eats a ridiculous amount of chocolate as he goes throughout his day. Everything is fine, that is, until dinner.
The problem with dinner is not that there is confetti or that there are hundreds of chocolates. No, it is that every item of food that Evan touches turns to some shade of red.
His water turns into a bright shade of fuchsia as soon as his lips touch it, his main dish becomes colored with deep reds and pale pinks, and even the cheesecake he has for desert turns into a lovely magenta shade as he eats it.
Maybe it shouldn’t make Evan smile as much as it does, but by the time that dinner is over, he’s laughing so much that he can hardly finish his brightly colored cheesecake.
Barty, of course, still denies everything. But his expression is incredibly fond as he gazes at his boyfriend, drinking in Evan’s every smile.
That night, Barty excuses himself from dinner early, but not without slipping a folded piece of paper into Evan’s pocket. Evan doesn’t notice right away, too busy laughing alongside Dorcas and Pandora.
However, Evan does notice the parchment during a break in the conversation some time later. Sliding the paper from his pocket, he unfolds it to find a simple note. “Come up to the dorm,” it says. Evan smiles as he takes it in, eyes sliding back over the words. It’s written in Barty’s handwriting, slightly crooked but endearingly so.
“I’ve gotta go,” he says as he stands, attempting to make a smooth exit.
From the look on Regulus’s face, he doesn’t quite manage it. “Do I want to know?” Regulus asks, grimacing.
Evan grins. “Depends on what it is, doesn’t it? Anyways, bye guys, I’ll see you later.”
There’s a mumbled chorus of goodbyes, and Evan grabs his bag. (Which happens to be noticeably lighter than it was at lunch, but we don’t need to talk about that).
Walking through the halls at this specific hour is a bit odd, because almost everyone is at dinner. There’s no one wandering about the castle as Evan makes his way to the dorm, his footsteps echoing loudly on the gray stones.
He gives this week’s password as he nears the common room, passing through it in order trek up the stairs that lead to the boys’ dorms.
As he pushes the door to his dorm open, he doesn’t know what he expects. Whatever he does expect, however, is not what he finds.
Barty is standing in the middle of the room, wearing a wide grin. And in his hands is a bouquet of gorgeous roses, their petals a deep red color.
Evan’s mouth falls slightly open as he takes in the scene, crossing over to Barty to fawn over the flowers.
Tracing a finger along one of the rose’s petals, he whispers softly, “Where did you get these? They’re beautiful.”
Barty shrugs, but Evan can tell that he’s pleased by the reaction he’s gotten. “Magicians never tell their secrets, Evs.”
Evan hums at that, taking the flowers from Barty’s outstretched hands. “Well, either way, thank you. They’re really, really pretty. ”
“Only for you,” Barty replies, gazing at Evan, who looks up and smiles shyly at him.
A thought then occurs to Evan, and he pauses for a second before asking, “Do you have a vase for these? I don’t want them to die.”
“Oh, uh, hold on one sec—“ Barty rifles through his pockets as if he’s going to find a vase there, and Evan looks on in amused silence.
After minute of confused rummaging, Evan realizes that Barty’s looking for his wand—which happens to be tucked right behind his ear.
“Barty,” he says, amusement lacing his words, “your wand’s right here.” He reaches out a hand and slides the wand out of place, then presents it to his bemused boyfriend.
“Oh, right,” Barty says, reaching out to take it, “I put it there so I wouldn’t forget where it was, you know.”
“Only you, Bee,” Evan says, smiling as Barty conjures a vase to put the bouquet in. Evan takes the vase from him and puts the roses in it, then walks over to his bedside table. He sets the vase down, positing it just so, and admires the roses for several moments.
“They really are lovely,” Evan says, still looking at the flowers. He turns around. “Thank you.”
Barty smiles. “Can’t resist the opportunity to lavish my boyfriend with gifts and chocolate and confetti, now can I?”
“Ah yes, my “secret admirer” has struck again, hasn’t he?”
“You know it,” Barty quips, swaying closer.
Evan closes the distance between them, tilting his face up towards Barty’s. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” he says, lips brushing against Barty’s. Barty kisses him in response, smiles lingering on both of their mouths.
“Happy Valentine’s,” Barty whispers back.
All in all, it’s the best Valentine’s either of them has had. And it doesn’t hurt that the chocolate lasts for weeks, either.
#I FINALLY finished it#and it’s still Valentines for me so#yay me!!#and yes I did stay up late and got up early to work on getting this out on time#and was still late compared to my usual posting time so there’s that#but i still managed to do it!!#and that’s what matters#rosekiller#evan rosier#barty crouch jr#slytherin skittles#marauders era#marauders fandom#Barty treating the whole thing as a joke until the end hehe 🤭#because he really does love Evan <3#he just thinks that Valentine’s day is kind of funny#rosekiller microfic#my microfics
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