#God that jacket on mc is so ugly lol

[masked-alien-lesbian]

Kelby Paxton and Brad

[tacky-optic]

I SAY BEHOLD BEHOLD OUR RAMBLES WITH YOUR PUNY MORTAL EYES, RANDOM INTERNET PEOPLE. IF UR DOWN THIS FAR Y'ALL SIGNED UP FOR THIS A LOOONG TIME AGO!!! but i really do appreciate this btw. its a genuine pleasure having the ceo/phd holder of luzeni go absolutely ham on my silly little post lol

anyway sending u a letter delicately sealed with an exquisite wax stamp pressed with a design of luzeni making out mega nasty style. yes there is carefully concealed old man yaoi inside

_ so many delicious hypotheticals, goddamn. having this mega sad edgelord noir detective zenigata blush a lil when this friggin' gyuhuhu-ass guy wearing an obnoxiously bright jacket crawls into his window is such a fantastic mental image. there's a reason i have this hyper-idealized image of this god forsaken schrodinger's koike zeni movie in my noggin because THATS WHERE YOU'D GET THE REAL NASTY SHIT. they had it right there-- reciting romeo and juliet and wanton declarations of violence via shooting to kill. that got to me man. right here. in my very real heart that i'm pointing to.

there's permanence in their impermanence, i think. same vein as that "stability in instability" take i already blathered about. their refusal to maintain anything concrete is their truce.

_ i personally think zeni cares about his bosses and the people he has to surround himself with (just so he has the resources to get closer to capturing lupin) a little bit. maybe 'flipping off' isnt the most accurate way of putting it but he would get some sensation out of proving them wrong, or just proving something, anything at all. he is SO praise-deprived. dude starts openly full-body bawling the second anyone tells him he did something, like, a little bit okay lmao. very pathetic wet cat behavior. zenigata is too human, he cares too much. every single aspect of him is simply a lot. in those moments where his full-throttle lupin-fixating is on the backburner, any bit of validation that lets him know he isn't wasting his life on this pursuit wracks him right to his goddamn core. stokes the fire, makes him work ten times as hard. as long as all of it circles back into fueling the Chase, its solid :thumbsup:

but maybe that's more of a pt 2/certain specials thing, i dunno. it weaseled its way into my brain somehow s'all i can say lol. either way its in his character dna. like you said there's just so many different versions of him, all with different extremes that somehow manage to maintain his core characterization. but holy shit moments where he does not give even a SINGLE SHIT are some of my favorites. pt 1 finale where he has that big-ass tantrum "I'M NOT GONNA GO ALONG WITH YOUR DUMBASS PLAN" and then the commish is like "DAMN RIGHT YOU FUCKING WON'T, YOU'RE DEMOTED" and then zeni smashes a chair or some shit. i think a golf club was involved?? whatever. "IM DOING THIS MY WAY. IF I FAIL I QUIT. TEA TIME'S OVER MOTHERFUCKER." its peak

_ "Let Lupin rot in jealousy and desire and the anger of not being the focal point of everything". as a chronic jigzeni obsessor this sings to me. i froth at the mouth over this. it really is difficult to concoct jigzeni without lupin peeking his ugly little freaknasty imp head in there because man, he really is so deeply integral to their lives (as he should be! as much as he simultaneously does and doesn't deserve it he is our mc.) but it IS possible. in my heart of hearts it is doable and it freaks all of them the fuck out. what a beautiful subversion-- it's not the guy, but the guy-adjacent. and the guy does not like that because it really is really sexy. sexier than he could've had it, which, wtf. that's not.... that's not right.

i think it boils down to jigen and zenigata just straight up not caring for once. which is all chill for jigen but inherently easier said than done for zenigata. i think that's where most of the hold-up stems from for some ppl. there's this one fic (sry i keep linking fics and i feel like i'm giving out homework waghhh) that i think about a lot where jigen's just perfect. like can we please just forget about him for ten fucking seconds??

unfortunately zeni could not forget in that fic. but if he did? mm. good shit. get bent, lupin. or not i guess. its jigen's turn, oops. better luck next timeline

i have unprompted lupin-esque questions pop into my stream of conscious, interrupting my day-to-day wholesale, and one of them is "damn. does lupin only have three companions because zenigata never caved and joined him". like what kind of question is that??

i think its one of the more recurring ones because the sorta lines in lupin tv/films that're like "kinda surprising you're a cop" or "you'd fit in real well with us" or, the wombo combo of the two, "your skills are wasted on your job" really dig into my brain and won't feckin' leave.

in a lot of iterations, jigen and goemon meet lupin when they're tasked with killing him. fujiko's essentially his other rival. and yet, despite whatever the rest of the gang may be doing or whoever they pledge themselves to or whatever other jobs they might take on they always wind up right next to lupin again. on the same team, even.

and then there's zenigata. the sole obstinate holdout. they truce, they save each other's lives, have an avengers bonus credit scene shawarma lunch, etc etc. yet he isn't *with* them. he dips after they stop some evil billionaire from blowing up a city for some asinine power/profit grab or whatever the fuck, shouting that he'll "get them next week" while comically shaking his fist at the sky, and jigen rolls his eyes for the dozenth time and goes "that guy'll never change, will he". no jigen, he won't. when things calm down he'll sit alone in his office and do paperwork for all the property damage he caused with lupin & co. like he always does.

lupin and zenigata prefer it that way, obviously. they know their roles and how to play them. zenigata's too good to be a cop but he's also too good to be with lupin. lupin will kill in self-defense whereas zenigata will *not* kill, period. a la "life is a much more incredibly significant thing".

and then there's the *other* obviously-- the adversarial aspect. they can only *truly* challenge each other if they're on opposing sides. jigen stuck around after lupin beat him. goemon pledged his allegiance to lupin after he bested him. fujiko cozies up to lupin because it's easier than outright contesting him. but lupin is the best criminal and zenigata is the best cop. of course they'll never swap sides. they have the most fun from where they are.

"but tackyyy, what if he *did* join them?" you may ask. well whether it'd be cathartic for zenigata or not aside, there's some other q's that come up that deserve some consideration.

would the gang finally be "complete" if zenigata finally shed his inspector title? what would that look like, how would it work out? what does that even *mean*? is lupin just collecting people he thinks are neat? if so, if a hypothetical (realllllllly emphasizing that hypothetical btw) fourth-- someone with skills on the right level and surprisingly good chemistry with the gang-- came along, would lupin welcome them? or would lupin look at zenigata and go "nah, i'd rather have *that* guy"? lots of stuff to explore.

but at the end of the day there's one thing that really gets my brain gears turning. i think zenigata's higher-ups imagine him on lupin's side and shudder. i think *zenigata* imagines himself on lupin's side and shudders. i think the only way his full potential can be realized is if he's with lupin *permanently*. those blips of unbridled feral skill wouldn't be blips anymore. they'd be normal. and devastating. and the five of them would be unstoppable. and maybe that'd scare him, finally knowing exactly what he's capable of. maybe it *already* scares him, knowing he's the only one who can decide what happens.

[schnitzelbutterfingers]

Out of Tune

Book/Pairing(s): Open Heart Book 3 || Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Abigail “Abby” Chacko)

Category/Warning(s): Mature || sexual content

Word Count: 800

Premise: One member of the jazz band from the tech party witnesses exactly how two of the doctors make most of their time alone.

Author’s note: Our family tested positive for COVID, and I’m bored. Imaginations run wild, so here ya go.

Anand Yadgiri is drained.

Drained from the party. Drained from Leland Bloom’s apprentices. Drained from Bloom himself. Drained from businessmen that can’t stop chattering their mouths off his ear. Drained from all these guests that keep asking him and his band to change the music.

It’s COVID season and they can’t even social distance from themselves.

There are doctors. Doctors in a tech-related party. And for what?

He is wholeheartedly done.

Bloom actually has the heart to give them a five minute break from this disastrous, noisy hell of a party. 

Anand takes a champagne flute from a passing waiter and drains it in one go. All he wants to do is go home to his grandmother, make sure she’s alright. But he’s not allowed since Bloom won’t pay them until they stay for at least two more hours.

Two more hours.

He can’t deal with this. He wants to leave, or he’ll actually cry.

He has a trip with his grandma and friend. Who knows if he can do that?

As he drinks his champagne in an empty dark corner, his friend. Glen, walks to him, a rather frustrated look on his face.

“Bloom wants our band to move near the right side of the windows.”

Anand scoffs. “For what? Can’t they hear us playing loud as we can.”

“Well apparently, he wants another set of buffets to be in the position we are currently.”

“Another set of buffets?”

Quite possibly taking in his current face, Glen replies, “Unfortunately.”

Anger contorts his face as he takes it in. Anand is drained.

“This man is impossible. All of this for what? Tech?”

His friend sighs. “Yep.”

This is monstrous. No, this is preposterous.

He’s making them do all of this for what? Just for some cash?

He’s lucky he doesn’t have another job, or else he would have left quickly from this horrid excuse of a party.

“Although, we do need to think about his wife, and how they can’t even touch each other anymore...” Glen trails off.

Ah, that news. He  has to admit, he felt pretty guilty and bad of how Leland can’t make physical contact with his wife, Caroline anymore. It would have been depressing if that was the case for Anand. 

Luckily, it isn’t.

His friend interrupts his train of thoughts.

“Alright, Imma go help the boys set our band near those windows.”

“I’ll be there once I take a small break.”

Anand glances around his surroundings, guests partying their asses off. Many tech-related people try to schmooze their way to the doctors. As he looks to the window, he sees that the band went to the buffets to restock their energy.

He can’t blame them. 

He nears the windows to take his saxophone, lowering it to a quiet voice, to practice by himself. Suddenly, he sees a flash of purple outside the windows.

Curiosity overtakes him as he follows the purple. 

Finally, the purple stops. It was a woman wearing a purple dress.

The dress is ugly as sin.

But the woman is beautiful. 

Dare he say, a model.

And the man tightly wrapping his arms around her seems to agree with him. 

Oh.

Oh.

Are they doing what he thinks they’re doing in such a very public place? On the balcony?

They’re making out as if it’s their last minutes alive. The man slams the woman against the railing as he devours her lips passionately, his hands insatiable as they roam her body.

Wait.

Wait.

Good gods, is that Dr. Ethan Ramsey? One of the most famous diagnosticians alive? What the hell happened to him?

He really wishes to ask him for an autograph, but how is he gonna do that in this position?

And wait. The woman... Dr. Abigail Chacko?

The sister of the Dr. Sebastian Chacko?

The female doctor who saved the life of Dr. Naveen Banerji?

He saw her name everywhere on television, from his cure to the gas leakage at the hospital.

Shaking his head, he inspects closely even as he refuses his actions to himself.

Abigail’s own hands wander over his back and shoulders, her matching purple fingernails scraping over the fabric of his dark jacket. She murmurs something in his ear, something that wasn’t very clear. But Ramsey’s words can be heard quite intelligibly. 

“I know. It’s taking everything I have not to rip this new outfit off you...”

And then he smiles devilishly. “But I imagine it would raise questions if we returned to the party totally naked.”

Anand swallows hard. 

Something most definitely happened to the man who he always sees as condescending and strict on live television. 

Instantly, he hears a loud gasp, to which it’s suddenly drained.

Oh my goodness.

Is he grinding against her?

The saxophonist can’t take it anymore.

He accidentally makes a sharp off-key note with his saxophone that is half dangling from his mouth.

The doctors, and before they turn around, he acts like he hasn’t been watching their little performance, and pretends to set the instruments up near the windows.

After a few minutes, Anand peers back consciously. They’re not there.

Just then, Bloom announces for the jazz band to perform “So What” by Miles David.

And Anand Yadgiri is most definitely drained.

Author’s note: I know, I know, it’s short. That’s all the energy I have for today lol. Please stay safe, wear a mask and use hand sanitizers whenever possible! ♥️

Perma: @potionsprefect​ @gryffindordaughterofathena​ @maurine07​ @missmiimiie​ @mom2000aggie​ @nezuzoned​

Ethan x MC: @rookie-ramsey​ @starrystarrytrouble​ @sophxwithers​ @lucy-268​ @udishaman​ @ohchoices​ @ariandrine​ @mayatrueman​ @takemyopenheart​ @obsessedrookie​ @estellaelysian​ @sunsetsparade​ @xxtraord1nary​

[no1gaytheist]

Obey Me! as real time fandub games quotes: Part 2:

Luke: Man, if only there was someone around here to be my friend... Like a dog or something.

Cerberus: *growls*

Luke: NOT QUITE WHAT I WAS ASKING FOR

---

MC: Now, come with me.

Asmo: I sure hope I can later...

MC: I fuckin heard that, idiot!

---

MC: What happened to your face, dude?

Beel: The lunchables.

---

Mammon, leaning over Asmo's unconscious body: What's this? Oh, a tape recorder...

*Hits play*

Asmo's voice: Hey bitch, what's up? I recorded this so after I die you get insulted, even when I can't breathe anymore. Your nose is stupid and your hair looks ugly. Look at my jacket, and my scarf. You'll never look as cool as me.

---

Satan: *breaks through Levi's wall*

Satan: GIVE ME THE BOOKS

Levi: JUST USE A DOOR, ASSHOLE!

---

(Lucifer spots Asmo in town when he's supposed to be grounded)

Asmo, sighing: Sometimes you just can't lose a daddy.

---

Levi: I'm. Not a great person, I'm going to be perfectly honest here.

MC: So you're bad at your job??

Levi: Yeah, pretty much. But you know what I'm not bad at?

MC: What?

Levi: Club Penguin.

---

Asmo: It is now 3:50, which is the time where we get our dance on! Any volunteers?

The brothers: ...

Asmo: Okay, if no one's gonna volunteer, then I'll just have to strut my own stuff.

*Dancing noises*

---

Asmo: Oh, fuck! THAT'S where I put my dildo! Aw, dammit, aw shit, I gotta go tell MC! Fuuuuuuu-

---

Levi: Oh. My god. This is so funny and random. Lol XD

---

Asmo: *gets shot*

Asmo: Aw man, I bought this shirt like, yesterday.

---

Levi: I'm sorry, I just get scared every time I hear the title "Jojo's Bizarre Adventure."

---

Mammon: Why are you so annoying? You're like the little brother I never wanted, but got somehow.

Levi: Okay. Okay, I see how it is.

Mammon: Yeah, that's exactly how it is.

Levi: Alright, well, I guess you're not invited to my birthday party.

Mammon: I didn't wanna go to your stupid lazer tag party anyway. I'm too busy.

Levi: LAZER IS TAG AHEAD OF IT'S TIME AND COOL!!!

---

Mammon: MC! I just got this email from a Nigerian prince, he's gonna give me ten thousand dollars!

---

Levi: I told you to stop monetizing my pain and dread and grief!

Mammon: Joke's on you motherfucker, those are counterfeit

Levi: The joke's always on me!

---

Solomon: Are you alive though? Like really, intensely alive.

Asmo: ... Don't do this to me Solomon. I think this is why we broke up.

Solomon: No, we broke up because you're just a construct of my imagination.

---

MC: Look, I got as much stuff as I could. I got your milk, juice, milk...

Beel: Those are all my possessions...

---

Yeah, there's bound to be more, but for now... *Hangs up my clown wig and goes to bed*

Part 1

[x-avantgarde]

SHINee World V - Hong Kong Experience!

So hello everyone owo I went to Shinee's World V, Hong Kong stop's concert!! (This is a Kpop post, I know but I will be back for vkei in the future! So please stay tuned!!) :D I bought the tickets really late orz and so before I start, I would like to apologize because I don't really know SHINee that well (I know them but I wasn’t a Shawol or anything) and I went because my mom likes Taemin (and SHINee) a lot XDD  (beware of this long ass post haha (it’s 2000+ words orz)

So we arrived at the venue at around 2pm? The merchandise opens at noon but I had this lesson that ends at noon so... We had lunch before we went to the venue (and the place is super far lol, but it's super close to the airport). Me and my mom took the airport express line from Kowloon (Elements?) to Asia World Expo and it was actually pretty quick (~20mins?). But the fare was super expensive OTL (though you get a discount if you show them your concert ticket).

There were A LOT of people lining up for the merch when I got there, but I wanted to get the light stick so badly (because I don't have one? XD) so I just lined up (like whatever haha). The line was super long, the merch was outside but the lines looped into the area where the standing went and waited. Around 30mins in the line I met people from my school lmao XD (so awkward bc we're actually not close?).

There were these people who approached us and asked us when we were in the line about whether we wanted light sticks or not (because they had "a bunch"). It was super fishy so I didn't get any, there were many cases in Kpop concerts where people sold fake light sticks :/// The official ones sold at 80HKD each but those people sold it at 60HKD each :////

After approximately two hours and fifteen minutes, I finally managed to get the merchandise :D Around halfway through the line, the staff gave us this sheet to write down what we wanted. In the end, I spent around 500HKD lmAO. I told myself I would only get the light stick and that was it, but you know what? I ended up getting an Onew fan, Onew key chain and these postcards (rip my money haha but it was so worth it). The Onew key chain is super duper cute!! owo (and yes my favourite member is Onew ouo)

It was around 4pm when we finished getting our merch, so me and my mom decided to go into this (kinda bad) cafe / restaurant place to sit down and eat something. I didn't eat anything because I literally just ate lunch three hours ago X"D Around 4:15, people were starting to line up. There are two places where you can go into the venue, one is on the ground floor, (for people in standing (who already got in) and people from the seating (block 5-13 (aka every block)) in the first rows. (A-M)). I was in block 10 row L so I had to get in on the ground floor.

Around 5:00 we went to line up and get ready to get in. The security was super strict and there were these Japanese girls in front of me who got cut off because they found a camera (but the girl said she went to disneyland and that's why she bought it). They took super long T___T until they finally managed to check my god damn bag. I bought a small-ish backpack but they literally took out everything T______T I understand that they didn't want any cameras inside the venue and stuff, but... uhhh really???

Me and my mom managed to get in, and we walked up the stairs (finally) and found our seats!! :))) On our seats, there was a pack, which included an balloon, a fan (double sided with a member's face) and this banner in Korean //orz what does it mean haha//. I got Key's fan so it's okay /but ugly sobbing because I didn't get Onew T_T/.

It was supposed to start at 6pm but they were super late (because Taemin had this earpiece problem so he kept apologizing during the introduction / first MC T___T (like CHILD ITS OK (let me give you a hug lmao). When the fans sat down, it felt super unreal, and it all felt like a dream. When the lights dimmed and we started screaming and chanting, "SHINEE! SHINEE! SHINEE!" They played a video (to our disappointment haha).

After that Shinee cAME OUT :DD They started with the song Sherlock and it's super good XD But I didn't warm up yet so I was kinda stiff and I didn't scream and all. (For some reason, I felt super awkward). But I was waving my light stick, just enjoying Shinee performing :))

The next song was Married To The Music and I was starting to get more hyped :) I lowkey sang along XDD I think they came out in suits or something (i forgot orz). Then the next song was Juliet (and the chorus is so catchy?!?!) After these three songs, it was MC timeeee! ^^ they started talking about how they haven't been to Hong Kong for a long time (around four years??) so they were really happy to be back. Key mentioned about how HK food was really good or something haha.

(Starting from this part, the order of the songs are going to be all messed up). They changed clothes somewhere after the MC or something like that (they changed way too often!!). I got more warmed up as Reply came up :DD Everyone sang along to it (and dude it's so good hahaha). You know how people would scream when a member's part comes up? That was me when Onew's part came up XD But it felt like I was the only Onew fan in my section because when Onew sings there were nearly NO ONE screaming T__T (It felt lowkey awkward because I would only be hearing my screams hahaha).

Then midway they changed into casual and I swear, Key looks SO GOOD in real life. During Lucifer, I was so hyped hahahaha. Key took off his white jacket because it was "too stiff and too hard to dance in it", and also he was like, "I look better without it". OMG XDD And guess what was underneath his jacket? A grey sleeveless shirt. SLEEVELESS. HE LOOKED SO GOOOD OMG. XD In the middle of the setlist /forgot which song orz/ he made the hand heart and it got onto the mini screen on the side. I got /shot/ in the heart owo.

THIS IS THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE CONCERT FOR ME HAHA. OKAY. During some song, Minho winked and gave this smooch towards the crowd OMG. AND IT WAS LIKE WINK THEN AIR KISS. /DIES/ WHEN HE DID THAT, I LITERALLY SPAZZED OUT ON MY SEAT HAHAHA, I WAS LIKE 'WHAT IS LIFE?' (He is so extra?!?! X"D)

In the middle of the setlist, (ESPECIALLY DURING Everybody), I got super duper hyped and screamed like crazy whenever it was Onew's part X"D (and also when their choreography was super cool). LIKE WHO CARES, I'M HERE TO HAVE FUN BITCHES XD During Everybody, these Japanese girls (again XD ikr, they have a lot of Japanese fans haha), also got super hyped XDDD Even though we weren't supposed to film, no one honestly gives a shit? (including me lmao). I filmed for around 30s in total XD (just to document the hype and it's the only thing I can hold onto after the concert T_T (other than the merch)).

They also performed Why So Serious, 1 of 1, So Amazing, View (that was aWESOME), Ring ding dong (the crowd was so high XD (including me hahaha)), Prism, Feel Good (CLIMAX OF THE CRAZINESS HAHA), Shift (don't really remember anything XD (except the fact they performed this song). The atmosphere was so awesome!! :))

In around the first quarter? Two members changed first, then the others went. Key, Minho and Taemin stayed first X"D Minho or Key was like, "I'm wondering if any of the members off stage are eating right now (referring to Onew and Jonghyun)" XD Then Onew and Jonghyun came back, wearing silk material / soft / shiny fabric clothes :DD it was so cool haha. (I think they also performed Dream Girl but I don't remember what happened T_T).

(I'm listening to SHINee's songs while typing this up so ahahahahaha) They sang a lot of the slower songs during that silk material clothing part XD (whatever you call it haha). Onew and Jonghyun also sang a duet-- Please Don't Go. This song was so touching and T_T //feels// Onew's voice was so sweet <333 /melts/ (Jonghyun's voice is also good <33) Hopefully Jonghyun's not sick or anything because he struggled a lot with hitting the high notes T___T especially during the duet and Replay QAQ

During Feel Good, oh my... oh my... The lyrics in the chorus, "I can make you feel good" X"D Everyone sang along in that part and I was kind of hesitant but I GAVE UP. So I also sang along and that was sooooo fun. This was one of the songs I like hahahaha. Though I wished they performed Tell Me What To Do because Jonghyun's voice in that song is GREAT.

There were a lot of Key and Taemin fans hahaha. Whenever it would be Key or Taemin's part, girls in my section would be screaming ahahah (like me in Onew's part X"D). And Onew's smile just melts my heart ouo Taemin also did a solo performance, he performed Sayonara Hitori (in Korean). His costume was so cool (there were these ribbons(?) that are sewn onto his sleeves, so whenever he spreads his arms it would look kind of like wings :D There were also these long stripes of red fabric hanging from the ceiling. There were also smoke(?) in the floor to make it even more dreamy <33 When my mom heard that song, she shook my arm excitedly and said, "This is my favourite song from Taemin!!" /lmao/ It was super cool and I enjoyed every single second of it /and I lowkey sang along because it's so good hahaha/

Skipping to Aside!! It was actually when we were supposed to blow up the balloons (which had led lights inside of them). I struggled a lot (because honestly I've never successfully blown a balloon before... until now XD) but the crowd looked super good because of the flashy balloons :DD Even Jonghyun was thankful for what the fans had prepared :DD (because he mentioned it in the ending speech).

Skip skip skip, time for chanting the encore! The fans actually started singing happy birthday (in Korean) to Shinee (as it's nearly their 9th anniversary!) ^_^ Every time we want to start over again (by singing happy birthday), we would all laugh as we don't know when we should start singing again haahaha (if it makes any sense XD). They came out in the moving carts (LIKE FINALLY?!) and the crew played So Amazing in the background. I really wanted to get one of their signed balls (that sounds wrong LMFAO /i'm sorry/) but I didn't manage to get one T_T because Onew and Jonghyun actually tried throwing some to my section but they didn't manage to throw it pass the crew (bc the crew was sandwiched between my section + the moving carts) OTL

/HIGHLIGHT NUMBER 2/ Since Minho was the only one on his cart, he actually stopped in front of my section (directly in front of me) and did the hand heart (like the one you make the heart with your arms + head??) towards my section XD I cried ahaha, and you know what? Before I knew it, MY HANDS AUTOMATICALLY DID AN ARM/HAND HEART BACK TO HIM. HE WAS SMILING SO BRIGHTLY OH MY GOSH. (No one in front of me did a heart back so it's actually possible he might have seen me in the corner of his eyes /dies from happiness/ /but it's okay if he didn't actually see me because giving a heart towards my section is already good enough <333/)

They did the ending speech and they reminded us to support Key's new drama <33 Shinee also told us that they will be back soon (isn't that what all the overseas idols say lmao). And it ended! I was so sad T___T they played a video (or some MV /i forgot/) and in the end the screen said "Thank you and love you" XD It was really touching but my mom had to ruin the moment and said, "Yeah, more like thank you and love your money" LMAO.

It was such a great experience and I have definitely fell in love with Shinee :D (who wouldn't if they attended Shinee's concert haha). It was so different from Visual Kei's lives and I might be doing a comparison in the future so please stay in touch with me! <3

[0225pm]

currently listening to: nothing without you / 10cm please click on the link and give it a listen while reading the english translations of the lyrics because it speaks for me.

yo haha

han is probably not gonna like that i posted that first photo of him and his bird’s nest hair because he thinks it’s ugly but he’ll always sparkle in my eyes hehe.

anyway on this day i decided to run away from responsibilities (i need to find a shorter word or phrase for skipping work other than just “skipping work”) and went to see the doctor at bedok polyclinic.

did you know? bedok polyclinic has moved! after god knows how many years but ya they’ve moved to a new location situated in a building right beside fairprice. i forgot what’s the name of the building. i think heart@bedok or something idk LOL but yay to new facilities and the hospital-like interior! i actually really dig the new place.

ok so the night before i asked han if he can accompany me and he was like sure what time? and i said idk maybe around 2? and he’s like okkkkkk but then he came late anyway but haha forgivable cus i’m forever late also besides, even if he came early we would still have to end up waiting anyway cus even after he arrived, i was still waiting for my number to be called e_____e 

me: so long sia the person at the registration counter say maybe must wait 2-3 hours and told me probably around 4:20pm my number will be called han: ya la everyone today monday blues then want to see doctor cus all never go work me: >____> 

and then he went to the vending machine and bought some drinks and a snack. we decided to sit at the area near the vending machine for awhile before moving over closer to the tv screen thingy where your number will be shown when it’s being called. we sat there for like idk i think 15-20 mins just talking shit and me touching han’s face and neck LOLLLL because his body’s so warm and i was cold af even though i was wearing a pullover, until this lady asked us to move and sit inside.

lady: hi are you still waiting? if waiting you can wait inside. me: oh but my room isn’t in hub A, mine’s hub B.  lady: then you cannot sit here because here only for hub A. me: ?????????? han: ????????  me: oh really ah....... han: duduk sini bayar lain pe (i can’t rly rmbr what he said but i know he sounded annoyed hahahaha damn funny and he even said it loudly wtf gile boi want to carik pasal) me: *stands up* hahahaha let’s go bb there got seats *points to hub B area* (which is fucking just beside hub A LOOLLLLL) han: *moves along with me while still muttering the duduk lain bayar lain thingy*

and then!!!!!

me: bb come sit beside me la *there were two empty seats and i already sat in one) han: *moves his butt* random lady: *sits beside me* me: LOLLLLLLLLL  han:  me: you so slow LOL han:  han: *continued sitting on the arm rest of the sofa couch* me: are you comfortable haha do you want to move? *points to another area of empty chairs* han: i’m ok baby i’m sitting also what here me: um okkkkkk

but lol tbh i wasn’t even complaining bc him sitting on the arm rest thingy actually made me feel so fluffy bc i can grab his arm and smell his old man perfume jacket. idk why la but just holding his arm makes me feel so safe and warm and nice wtf idk how to like describe the feeling but i love it la ok. and then he pat my head hahahaha and i was being so passive aggressive about cus i said smth like it’s r00d but actually i like it wtf bodo sia me *facepalm* then he talked about how it doesn’t matter cus he’ll be paying for my head anyway and i was so confused at this point cus like uh what do you mean paying for my head??? then he explained about the zakat thing and how the man in the fam must pay all. quite interesting bc my parents did talked about zakat thingy before but i don’t really know much about it.

also!!! i’m not tryna like stir beef w old men out there but like i described the perfume as old man bc it smells exactly like the perfume my nose sometimes decide to take a whiff of when i walk past old yalam men going to the mosque. also!!! apparently the perfume is from a small bottle that his grandad gave him/used to use or smth i can’t rmbr clearly sorry this post is like 2 days old my memory is shit i need to learn the mind palace thing!!!

i also saw mustakim and his boyfriend!! at first i was like ooooh who is that familiar person and then i realised it was him but we didn’t acknowledge each other hahhahaha 

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ok ya so i went to see the doctor and decided to ask for doxycycline again to help with my acne and bumps. she also prescribed some 2.5% benzoyl peroxide for me though i’m currently tryna steer clear of any acne treatment products at the time being cus my skin is already super dry after washing my face and all those products i dumped on my face to help soothe and relief the pain when my face had a crazy ass breakout party the other time. also apparently you’re supposed to religiously take doxy for like 6 months before you can really see the difference wtf. i’ve been taking them for only a month and then i stopped cus i thought it wasn’t helping at all and the doctor before this that prescribed me doxy the 1st and 2nd time didn’t even tell me such basic info. but ya you’re supposed to take it for about 6 months but some people can see some changes in the period of 3-4 months. then she told me to just come back for monthly visitations and see if there’s any improvement. i should have probably also set an appointment for next month so i don’t have to wait so long for my turn but i didn’t ahhahahahaha

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then after more waiting for the collection of the meds, payment and official stamp for my mc, we finally went to eat!!! yayerz

han told me that there was fish n chicks at the coffee shop beside princess and i was like ?????? really???????? omg wow i didn’t know they have an outlet here in the east wah damn near leh!!!!!! so we decided to eat there! i would have taken better photos but nvm la hungry already also hahaha! i got chargrilled chicken with cheese pasta and fries for the sides, and han got black pepper chicken with the same sides. i’m gonna try their popular hawaiian chicken next time cus i saw a photo of it on the internet and it looks frikin delish!!! kinda wish i had ordered that one instead but it’s ok there’s always a next time!

and then we sat there for a really long time, the sun even set and the evening skies started taking over the day. we talked about so many things, mainly about what happened the other time at the hotel (will be in another post!), how cheated he felt when i didn’t wear matching outfits with him on the day we went to afa, how disappointed he was when he knew i wasn’t able to come on the day his mom got married after telling his cousins about me and styling his hair, grooming himself just to see my reaction when he pick me up, and then about NS stuff.

i felt so sorry.  and felt even shittier after he told me that he doesn’t wanna wear or try to initiate wanting to wear anything matchy anymore. but i guess, i understand. he doesn’t really like matching things (kinda sux bc i like it) and when he tried to do it, i ended up just brushing his efforts aside. 

sigh.

i was even more sorry about the day of the marriage. cus it was also our 9th month, an even special day for us. yet everything was ruined when all he wanted was to see me. i wanted to see him too, but circumstances wouldn’t let us. 

but i learnt something through this talk we had.  i’m also glad that he tells me things now without me having to force it out of him. i’m not sure if he realised that he tells me things but i really like that raw and vulnerable side of him when he talk about how he feels. not because it makes me feel like i have authority or whatever, but more so because he trusts me enough to confide and have a h2h talk about whatever he feels displeased with rather than just keep it to himself and letting his true thoughts and feelings consume him from the inside.

also by knowing our mistakes, and the hurt we caused each other because of our actions, we can learn from the mistakes and work things out together to try and prevent the same or similar things from happening again in the future. 

communication is really the key and i’m happy to know that han feels the same because he wants the relationship to go far. damn i’m starting to sound old. or maybe this is part of me adulting in a relationship. 

(to be continued)