#i looove jealous lupin

[tacky-optic]

I SAY BEHOLD BEHOLD OUR RAMBLES WITH YOUR PUNY MORTAL EYES, RANDOM INTERNET PEOPLE. IF UR DOWN THIS FAR Y'ALL SIGNED UP FOR THIS A LOOONG TIME AGO!!! but i really do appreciate this btw. its a genuine pleasure having the ceo/phd holder of luzeni go absolutely ham on my silly little post lol

anyway sending u a letter delicately sealed with an exquisite wax stamp pressed with a design of luzeni making out mega nasty style. yes there is carefully concealed old man yaoi inside

_ so many delicious hypotheticals, goddamn. having this mega sad edgelord noir detective zenigata blush a lil when this friggin' gyuhuhu-ass guy wearing an obnoxiously bright jacket crawls into his window is such a fantastic mental image. there's a reason i have this hyper-idealized image of this god forsaken schrodinger's koike zeni movie in my noggin because THATS WHERE YOU'D GET THE REAL NASTY SHIT. they had it right there-- reciting romeo and juliet and wanton declarations of violence via shooting to kill. that got to me man. right here. in my very real heart that i'm pointing to.

there's permanence in their impermanence, i think. same vein as that "stability in instability" take i already blathered about. their refusal to maintain anything concrete is their truce.

_ i personally think zeni cares about his bosses and the people he has to surround himself with (just so he has the resources to get closer to capturing lupin) a little bit. maybe 'flipping off' isnt the most accurate way of putting it but he would get some sensation out of proving them wrong, or just proving something, anything at all. he is SO praise-deprived. dude starts openly full-body bawling the second anyone tells him he did something, like, a little bit okay lmao. very pathetic wet cat behavior. zenigata is too human, he cares too much. every single aspect of him is simply a lot. in those moments where his full-throttle lupin-fixating is on the backburner, any bit of validation that lets him know he isn't wasting his life on this pursuit wracks him right to his goddamn core. stokes the fire, makes him work ten times as hard. as long as all of it circles back into fueling the Chase, its solid :thumbsup:

but maybe that's more of a pt 2/certain specials thing, i dunno. it weaseled its way into my brain somehow s'all i can say lol. either way its in his character dna. like you said there's just so many different versions of him, all with different extremes that somehow manage to maintain his core characterization. but holy shit moments where he does not give even a SINGLE SHIT are some of my favorites. pt 1 finale where he has that big-ass tantrum "I'M NOT GONNA GO ALONG WITH YOUR DUMBASS PLAN" and then the commish is like "DAMN RIGHT YOU FUCKING WON'T, YOU'RE DEMOTED" and then zeni smashes a chair or some shit. i think a golf club was involved?? whatever. "IM DOING THIS MY WAY. IF I FAIL I QUIT. TEA TIME'S OVER MOTHERFUCKER." its peak

_ "Let Lupin rot in jealousy and desire and the anger of not being the focal point of everything". as a chronic jigzeni obsessor this sings to me. i froth at the mouth over this. it really is difficult to concoct jigzeni without lupin peeking his ugly little freaknasty imp head in there because man, he really is so deeply integral to their lives (as he should be! as much as he simultaneously does and doesn't deserve it he is our mc.) but it IS possible. in my heart of hearts it is doable and it freaks all of them the fuck out. what a beautiful subversion-- it's not the guy, but the guy-adjacent. and the guy does not like that because it really is really sexy. sexier than he could've had it, which, wtf. that's not.... that's not right.

i think it boils down to jigen and zenigata just straight up not caring for once. which is all chill for jigen but inherently easier said than done for zenigata. i think that's where most of the hold-up stems from for some ppl. there's this one fic (sry i keep linking fics and i feel like i'm giving out homework waghhh) that i think about a lot where jigen's just perfect. like can we please just forget about him for ten fucking seconds??

unfortunately zeni could not forget in that fic. but if he did? mm. good shit. get bent, lupin. or not i guess. its jigen's turn, oops. better luck next timeline

i have unprompted lupin-esque questions pop into my stream of conscious, interrupting my day-to-day wholesale, and one of them is "damn. does lupin only have three companions because zenigata never caved and joined him". like what kind of question is that??

i think its one of the more recurring ones because the sorta lines in lupin tv/films that're like "kinda surprising you're a cop" or "you'd fit in real well with us" or, the wombo combo of the two, "your skills are wasted on your job" really dig into my brain and won't feckin' leave.

in a lot of iterations, jigen and goemon meet lupin when they're tasked with killing him. fujiko's essentially his other rival. and yet, despite whatever the rest of the gang may be doing or whoever they pledge themselves to or whatever other jobs they might take on they always wind up right next to lupin again. on the same team, even.

and then there's zenigata. the sole obstinate holdout. they truce, they save each other's lives, have an avengers bonus credit scene shawarma lunch, etc etc. yet he isn't *with* them. he dips after they stop some evil billionaire from blowing up a city for some asinine power/profit grab or whatever the fuck, shouting that he'll "get them next week" while comically shaking his fist at the sky, and jigen rolls his eyes for the dozenth time and goes "that guy'll never change, will he". no jigen, he won't. when things calm down he'll sit alone in his office and do paperwork for all the property damage he caused with lupin & co. like he always does.

lupin and zenigata prefer it that way, obviously. they know their roles and how to play them. zenigata's too good to be a cop but he's also too good to be with lupin. lupin will kill in self-defense whereas zenigata will *not* kill, period. a la "life is a much more incredibly significant thing".

and then there's the *other* obviously-- the adversarial aspect. they can only *truly* challenge each other if they're on opposing sides. jigen stuck around after lupin beat him. goemon pledged his allegiance to lupin after he bested him. fujiko cozies up to lupin because it's easier than outright contesting him. but lupin is the best criminal and zenigata is the best cop. of course they'll never swap sides. they have the most fun from where they are.

"but tackyyy, what if he *did* join them?" you may ask. well whether it'd be cathartic for zenigata or not aside, there's some other q's that come up that deserve some consideration.

would the gang finally be "complete" if zenigata finally shed his inspector title? what would that look like, how would it work out? what does that even *mean*? is lupin just collecting people he thinks are neat? if so, if a hypothetical (realllllllly emphasizing that hypothetical btw) fourth-- someone with skills on the right level and surprisingly good chemistry with the gang-- came along, would lupin welcome them? or would lupin look at zenigata and go "nah, i'd rather have *that* guy"? lots of stuff to explore.

but at the end of the day there's one thing that really gets my brain gears turning. i think zenigata's higher-ups imagine him on lupin's side and shudder. i think *zenigata* imagines himself on lupin's side and shudders. i think the only way his full potential can be realized is if he's with lupin *permanently*. those blips of unbridled feral skill wouldn't be blips anymore. they'd be normal. and devastating. and the five of them would be unstoppable. and maybe that'd scare him, finally knowing exactly what he's capable of. maybe it *already* scares him, knowing he's the only one who can decide what happens.

[themarauderstheoutsidersandpeggy]

Could you do a dating Remus Lupin alphabet? Sorry if you already did it.

MasterlistJoin my TaglistPrompt lists

Please send me requests!

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about the other?)

So he finds your personality more attractive than any physical feature, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love your look. He loves how caring you are, your mama bear tendencies that show after every moon.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

Yes and no - he is extremely scared that the baby will inherit his lycanthropy and he doesn’t want to do that to anyone, let alone his own child. But there are also the times when he finds himself wishing he was a father and he could see you as a mother.

C = Cuddle (How do they cuddle?)

He is cautious in the beginning and then by the end he has moved directly on top of you. He just likes feeling supported, physically and metaphorically.

D = Dates (What are dates with them like?)

He likes to be very private. He takes you to the forest or the lake or just his dorm and he just spoils you sm

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…))

“You are my treasure” bc he really didn’t think you would stay, it’s not that he didn’t think you were nice enough, he didn’t think it was capable of any human to endure him. He didn’t believe in fate or anything like that until he met you and he is an absolute believer now omg he’s so grateful amlfkekak

F = Feelings (When did they know they were in love?)

He realized after the sixth full moon - you had finally figured out that he was a werewolf and you spent three days in his room with him reading to him and feeding him when he was too weak and taking care of him aaa

G = Gentle (Are they gentle? If so, how?)

The most gentle boi? He’s really really scared or lashing out on you or just in general hurting you so you can be sure that this boi is always so so so gentle

H = Hands (How do they like to hold hands?)

He likes to hold hands 25/8 he will lace your fingers together and stroke your hand with his thumb

I = Impression (What was their first impression?)

He was actually hiding behind a library shelf bc he was too shy to talk to you so from the beginning he knew you were amazing and his other half

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous?)

Only around the moon - very possessive and touchy 10/10 would recommend

K = Kiss (How do they kiss? Who initiated the first kiss?)

He kisses vv soft and passionate but around the moon it goes into rough and aggressive (not in a bad way tho)

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

He does. It’s after you discover his lycanthropy and you don’t scream or run, you just hug him, and he breaks down. He starts crying, sobbing in your arms and he chokes out an I love you before he kisses you senseless

M = Memory (What’s their favourite memory together?)

When you met his parents. Even though they were embarrassing him with baby pictures and stories he saw how happy you were and how much they loved you

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

So he’s not super rich like James or Sirius, but he does have some money. He buys you a lot of chocolate and books but he more spoils you emotionally bc he knows you love the little things in life

O = Orange (What colour reminds them of their other half?)

A light, soft brown bc that’s your favorite sweater of his and so you wear it all the time

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

Darling, love, baby, babe, sweet, pumpkin, treasure, just lotsa fluff

Q = Quaint (What is their favourite non-modern thing?)

He loooves reading to you in front of the fire while running his hands through your hair andkakaflnjhbkfjdlafdk

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

He likes to make a blanket and pillow fort and snuggle up with you and read to you

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/others up?)

He cheers the both of you up with some chocolate and snuggles

He cheers other people up by distracting them from the source of their sadness

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

He likes to talk about the books that he’s reading to you, and you to the Marauders. He really doesn’t talk too much to anyone else, he’s pretty shy

U = Unencumbered (What helps them relax?)

He really likes taking you out to the astronomy tower and just staring at the stars with you

V = Vaunt (What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?)

Again, he’s pretty shy - he doesn’t ever show anything off, but he really is proud of you and your relationship

W = Wedding (When, how, where do they propose?)

He proposed after James and Lily’s wedding - he danced with you and realized that he wanted you to be in the white gown and dancing with him in the near future. He brought you to a private room in James’ house and proposed and he didn’t know it but the entire wedding party was watching and cooing.

X = Xylophone (What’s their song?)

DEMONS BY IMAGINE DRAGONS DON’T EVEN FIGHT ME ON THAT HOOOO

Y = Yes (Do they ever think of getting married/proposing?)

He thinks of it all the time but doesn’t know when is the best time. The war was on and he wanted to do it before (god forbid) he lost you but he never knew when to do it.

Z = Zebra (If they wanted a pet, what would they get?)

He would get a lil kitten or a puppy bc he wants a simple lil loving bby but he wants to have them when they’re little so that he can spend more time with them :’)

Taglist: @knowledgeisthebomb @moonyswolf @astertist@accio–zoe@wutheringweasley @crispyfrenchfriescrisis @set-phasers-to-cuddle@thecurlyhairedwinchester @snazzy-posts@huffle-homie24601@celestialdiamandis @queen678900@gryffindor-dork@ilostcount-helpme@Dedellis @ellie-emb@nervous-shawn@fcavalerro@dorcasmeadoweslupin@chloe-geoghegan1@lostnliterature@remusfreakinglupin@marvelouspottering@snoploop@johnnycadeissocute@all-thegayships@briisasinamonroll@bonjouritsellaa@lady-of-lies@ardentmuse@blueivysuniverse @dark-night-sky99 @ilovetvshowsblog@s0cial-retard@savethehoneybees @luna-xxxxx@fcavalerro @xmoonylupinx @swansong321 @xinyourdreamsx @spideymood @bvmakk @deathofthethrones @thecurlyhairedwinchester 

[sky-full-of-imagines]

Vive la France (Remus Lupin x Reader)

So how about a reader who's been friends with Moony when they were little children, but who then got separated because he went to Hogwarts and she - to Beauxbatons. And then somewhere around the fifth year she transfers to Hogwarts, and Remus realizes he has a thing for her but he doesn't show. So then the Marauders start to hit on her deliberately in order to make Remus jealous and get him to tell her about with feelings? Lots of fluff, maybe? Thank you so much in advance! You are so talented it's inhuman!

I love love loved this request!! I tried to write a French accent so I hope I did an okay job, I took French for six years so I hope my phrases are accurate!

French translations:

Vivante: lively

Amis: friends

Mes amis: my friends

Oui: yes

Ma chère: my dear

Tais-toi: be quiet/shut up.

Maman et papa: mommy and daddy.

Y/Nm: your nickname

You adjusted your black robes for what seemed to be the hundredth time, missing the blue of your former uniform. Your mother sent you a comforting look as she waved one last time before you were being directed towards the Headmaster’s office where you would be sorted into your Hogwarts house. You were a transfer student from Beauxbatons, only a month into the school term so you still had time to catch up in your lessons. Your father had landed a much better job in London, much closer to Hogwarts so it was decided that it might do your family some good to turn a new leaf. You nervously sat in front of Dumbledore and another professor, McGonagall if you recalled correctly.

“Don’t be nervous dear, now, the sorting hat will determine which house you belong in, then we’ll have one of the Prefects from that house come and escort you to your lessons and give you a tour of the school.” He said kindly as you politely nodded. Ever since your parents told you that you would be switching schools, you promptly wrote to your best friend, Remus Lupin; you two grew up together but then once you moved to France you didn’t see each other as often, but you wrote to each other every week and tried to at least visit him once every year. You remembered how nervous he was when he told you about his condition, but you didn’t care that he was a werewolf, he was still your sweet best friend, you were more worried about his well-being, remembering how the full moons took a toll on him and you hoped that they were easier to deal with now that he was older. Remus attended Hogwarts, and you were bursting with excitement at the prospect of going to school with him. Your nerves seemed to have betrayed you because you were drawing a blank at which house he belonged to…what if you were placed in a different house...

You were knocked out of your thoughts when Dumbledore placed the hat gently on top of your hair.

“Hmm…a cunning mind…yes very cunning indeed, but extremely witty and creative as well. We certainly can’t box you in a house with just one of those traits…yes, you’ll do good in Gryffindor, I can see great bravery in you, not afraid of the unknown.” Said the hat after a couple of minutes. You saw the witch next to Dumbledore smile.

“Well Miss L/N, looks like you’re in my house. I’ll go find my Prefect and he’ll be your guide for the day. I’m sure you’ll make Gryffindor proud.” Professor McGonagall said, and with that she left the office. After a few minutes she came back, next to her was the familiar face of your favorite, chocolate lover, lanky best friend.

“REMUS!” you exclaimed before hugging him. He chuckled in response, hugging you back.

“I’m glad you got sorted into Gryffindor Y/Nm.” He said fondly.

“Mr. Lupin, today you are in charge of showing Miss L/N around, make her feel welcomed but I’m sure the latter won’t be a problem.” Dumbledore said, shooting McGonagall a knowing smile. Remus nodded, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink while you blushed slightly next to him.

You both exited the headmaster’s office, walking in a comfortable silence.

“Let me guess, you completely forgot each house and were slightly panicking while the hat ominously whispered in your ear?” he said, a goofy smile making its way on his face.

“Oh shut up…but yes, I did. But hey! At leas’ we are in zhe same house!” you responded, shoving him slightly to the side, as he chuckled.

“Well, as you can see the castle is big, not as big as Beauxbatons but still quite impressive.”

“My friends back at Beauxbatons would kill me, but I am starting to like Hogwarts a lot more.” you said softly as you looked around the castle walls, taking in the moving portraits and the low candlelight that adorned the archways.

“I wouldn’t say so just yet, our resident dead prankster, Peeves, will have you singing a different tune I’m sure.” He said as he led you up a long staircase, warning you of a loose floorboard.

“Speaking of prankster… didn’t you mention how your best friends were big on pranks? What did you call yourselves… ah yes, zhe explorerz?” you teased.

“Very funny, and it’s marauders.” He said with a good natured eye roll.

“Explorerzs, marauderzs, same thing. Either way, I’m looking forwar’ to meeting your amis!” you said cheerfully.

“Hope they don’t scare you off, love.” He added as he led you towards the dining hall.

“There’s about ten minutes until lunch, figured we could come a bit earlier. The tables are divided by each house: Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin.” He explained as he pointed to the four long tables, each already set with countless of silverware, plates and goblets.  You both made your way to the Gryffindor table and soon enough the great hall was filling up with students, all eager to eat and relax before their afternoon lessons.

You were too caught up in your thoughts, and people watching, that you didn’t notice the three boys that came to sit down next to you and Remus.

“Should we poke her?”

“Yeah, let’s poke the new cute girl Prongs, it’ll be real smooth.”

“Shut up, Pads, it’s not like you’re coming up with any good ideas.”

“Will you two stop ogling my best friend?” Remus snapped, glaring at the two boys. Sirius and James got quiet for a few seconds but then their eyes lit up with understanding, a smirk making its way on each of their faces. Remus waved them off and turned to you, tapping your shoulder softly and bringing you back to reality.

“Y/N, these are my friends, Sirius Black, James Potter and Peter Pettigrew.” He said pointing to each of them. They each waved but Sirius and James were on a mission to get a reaction out of Remus so they each pulled out their charm, much to Remus’s displeasure.

“Pleasure to meet you, and might I add just how fortunate we are to have you here. Our very own beauty, our treasure. We shall admire and guard you, I’ll alerts the knights.”

“That’s right, Sirius.” James said, doing an elaborate bow as Remus rolled his eyes.

“Well Remus wasn’t kidding when he said you were a bit vivante.” You said chuckling slightly. At hearing your accent Sirius and James smirked even more, shooting a fleeting look towards Remus who was glaring at them, if looks could kill…

“Is that a French accent I hear?” Sirius asked.

“Oui, I’m a transferred student from ze magic school in France, Beauxbatons. Did Remus not tell you?” you answered, smiling as you saw how your goblet refilled itself.

“No, he didn’t. In fact, he didn’t even tell us you were coming today.” James said.

“Remus would love for her to come, isn’t that right Moony?” Sirius added with a sly smile.

“For Merlin’s sake, both of you shut up...” Remus grumbled; he was quite thankful that you didn’t catch the double meaning behind Sirius’s words seeing as how you were busy deciding which pastry to choose from.

Lunch went on, the boys kept asking you questions about Beauxbatons and how it was different from Hogwarts, but before you could keep on talking about it, the bell rang signaling the end of the lunch hour.

“Come on, Y/Nm, we have Potions next.” Remus said kindly as he picked up your bag for you.

“Fear not Moony, we can escort Y/N! Think of us as her handsome bodyguards.” Sirius offered. Before Remus could object you spoke up.

“It’s okay, I love to ‘ear the fun facts Remus has about the castle! Besides I missed ‘im very much.” You said as took his arm and led him towards the exit.

“Well, I think we got our job cut out for us. Y/N is definitely into our dear Moony, and is not shy about showing it, but Moony is a bit more on the shy side of the looove spectrum.” James pondered out loud.

“You’re right, I think operation Vive la France is a go.” Sirius concluding, earning an approving nod from James as Peter merely watched, shaking his head at his meddling best friends.

 As the weeks went by you began to feel at home at Hogwarts, you wrote to your friends weekly, and your parents were very happy with how well you were adjusting. Remus was over the moon by how you were settling in and he was extremely fond of your study dates, although you had never called them that, but he liked to think of them as dates. Little did he know you felt the same way.

“Oi! Y/N! Where are you headed? We’re going to the lake before dinner, we want to lure out Ollie out.” Sirius called out as he ran to catch up with you in the hallway.

“Ollie? Did you name ze giant squid Ollie.”

“Yes we did. He’s a Virgo, extremely picky when it comes to snacks…” James trailed off.

“Sorry mes amis, but I’m meeting Remus at the library, he’s been helping me with my Eenglish and I don’t want to be late.” you said as politely, smiling to yourself by the mere fact of seeing Remus.

“Oh really? We’ll join you!” Sirius said brightly, bursting with excitement at the thought of his and James’s plan finally going into play.

You three made your way to the library, James and Sirius whispering to themselves and eyeing you suspiciously every so often. You simply brushed it off, thinking that they were simply plotting their next “super-secret” prank. After a few minutes of walking next to the whispering duo, you all made it to the library, you guided them towards yours and Remus’s spot, near the back of the library where there was a fireplace that Remus would light during each of your study sessions knowing how cold you got.

“Bonjour, Remus! I found our friends while I was on my way ‘ere. They insisted on joining us.” You greeted him and explained why the two marauders were with you.

“Hello Y/N, James, Sirius. I’m sure these two were probably incredibly annoying and for that I apologize.” Remus chuckled.

“No more annoying zan usual.” You replied, laughing softly.

Soon you both set to work and after a few minutes James coughed three times, signaling Sirius to put their plan into action, Sirius nodded and so it began.

“Say, ma chère, you look lovelier than ever. Even the reddest rose shrivels in comparison to your beauty.” Sirius said casually, leaning into your side, taking a hold of your hand. At his actions Remus’ eyebrows shot up, almost dropping the quill he was writing with.

“Zank you, but you should really go back to your essay if you want to finish it.” you answered politely. Remus visibly relaxed by how you brushed Sirius’ charm off. Another half an hour passed, Remus was in the middle of correcting your essay, checking for spelling and grammar mistakes while the two boys were doodling on the corner of their parchments. All was peace and quiet until James broke the silence.

“Hey, Y/N?”

“Yes, James?”

“Are you doing anything this weekend?” he asked with a growing smirk. Out of the corner of his eye he saw how Remus stopped reading your Transfiguration essay and was looking intently at the two of you.

“No, I don’t zhink so.”

“Well, then I think we should go to Hogsmeade together, we can go to Madam Puddifoot’s.” he continued smoothly.

“’ow kind of you, but I will have to say no, maybe you could take Lily.” You said politely, going back to your current essay, not noticing how Remus was glaring at James with such an intensity that if looks could kill the poor boy would’ve been history. A few minutes went by and you excused yourself as you went to look for a book to finish your essay. As soon as you walked away Remus turned to his two friends.

“Care to explain what in the bloody hell was that all about?” he asked seething.

“Whatever do you mean, Moony?” Sirius asked coyly, as James snickered next to him.

“The flirting! With Y/N! and the asking her out!” he whispered-shouted, not wanting Madam Pince to come and yell at them.

“Moony, do you care if we flirt with Y/N? I mean you have said countless of times that she’s just a friend…”

“Oh sod off, James.” He muttered as he went back to editing your essay, not daring to make eye contact with his friends. You were coming back, but before you could make your presence known Sirius made a stopping motion with his hand as well as bringing his pointer finger his lips, signaling you to keep quiet. You were standing behind Remus, confused at to what was going on.

“Well, well, well, Sirius, I think Remus likes Y/N.”

“Hmm you might be right, Prongs.”

“So what if I do, now can you two shut up before she comes back…”

“Ha! We knew it! Just tell her how you feel, she’s obviously into you.” James shrugged as if it was the easiest thing in the world.

“No she’s not. She’s this great, incredibly pretty, charming, funny girl, and I’m just a dorky werewolf.” He said defeated, not noticing that you have been standing behind him for the last few minutes, hearing the whole conversation. You cleared your throat, making your presence known, Remus dropped his quill as his eyes widened comically.

“I zhink you are wrong. You are so much more zhan zat and I like you, a lot. So how about we steal James’s idea and go to Hogsmeade together?” you said, blushing by your confession. Remus starred at you, wide-eyed as Sirius and James eagerly watched your exchange from the sidelines.

“I would love that.” Remus said after ten long seconds. You smiled brightly. The two of you went back to work, brushing into each other’s hands and arms more than usual or necessary. The quiet atmosphere was soon interrupted by Sirius’s stomach growling, signaling you all that it must be almost time for dinner. You all packed your belongings, Remus taking hold of your bag and hand, and made your way to the dining hall.

“So does this mean we get to call you both mom and dad?” Sirius asked as you kissed Remus on the cheek once he set your bag down and sat next to you.

“Sirius, for the love of Merlin…” Remus started.

“Tais-toi.” You finished.

“Okay fine, maman et papa…” he said smirking which earned him a slap on the back of his head by Remus. James spit out his pumpkin juice due to how much he was laughing.

“If you don’t stop laughing, I’ll hit you next.”