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girlbossblackbeard · 1 year ago

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S2 TRAILER ANALYSIS WITH 1 BILLION SCREENSHOTS

obligatory warning that this post is gonna be SOOOOOOOOOOOOO foolishly long and rambling with all my silly little theories and thoughts and if you ALSO have silly little theories and thoughts you should ABSOLUTELY share them here please!!!! we can clown so much harder when our cacophonous honking harmonizes!!!!!!!

NOW ONTO THE POST (putting it under a read more so tumblr doesn't literally explode):

-the revenge looks BUSTED AF: i don't know if this is from general disrepair when ed is in his kraken era or if she was in a battle but her sails are all dirty in the opening shot of the trailer, and later we see stede on her deck with tattered sails and ropes everywhere, AND i'm like 99% sure that the shot of buttons ziplining from one ship to another is him going from the Chinese warfleet ship to the revenge, which i'm guessing is essentially stuck bc the sails are so torn they would never be able to catch the wind strongly enough to move her. I also wonder if the shot of roach shooting a canon at something is him shooting a canon at her since we had all those allusions to her exploding from samba, vico, and david on twitter all those months ago

-stede's earring: he DOES NOT HAVE THE EARRING when we see him lying on the deck next to roach and sighing dramatically nor does he have it during his conversation with Olu about stede dumping him, but he DOES have the earring in later shots like the beach english fight and when he's talking about being a failure his whole life which means WE WILL GET TO SEE STEDE GET HIS EAR PIERCED!!!!!!!!!! we'll get to see him make the decision to look even hotter and who knows who does the piercing for him idk!!!!!! @sluterastede had a dastardly beautiful thought in her brain about ed giving stede the piercing and stede making groaning noises and izzy once again thinking they're flapping their jacks right there on the deck in front of god and everybody!!!!!

-stede is spilling his heart out ("i let him down. i should've just told him how i feel") to susan on her ship (you can tell it's her by the long hair)

-interesting that there's a drawing of a donkey next to ed's wanted poster considering s1 had the line "a rich donkey is still a donkey". also i can't really read what the surrounding posters say other than "WANTED 20 GUINEAS". is this in the republic of pirates?

-stede says "i will find him" meaning ed may be actively avoiding stede at the beginning of the season???? (or the basic laws of travel physics have finally caught up to them)

-"look, captain, you know blackbeard's gonna murder you" i just think it's interesting that Olu is referring to him as blackbeard again even though ed told everyone in his pink robe era to call him ed. like it makes sense that he'd say blackbeard considering ed is on a rampage but it just made my brain wheels start spinning

-the Kraken crew are eating cake :)

-ed is holding a torch while letting the storm rain down on him: i don't think the laugh we hear is his because i don't think his mouth is even open during that slow-mo shot

-STEDE with a TEAR in his EYE as he says "i think i hurt him pretty bad"

-ed sobbing on the floor while the little bride cake topper is next to his head

-ed choking on the weed smoke i'm ACTUALLY crying, but also: where the fuck is ed when he's sitting in the chair smoking??? i thought it was on deck at first bc above his head is really dark and it looks like the lanterns we see on the deck of the revenge but there's a chandelier too?? it might be whatever shop Anne Bonny and her friend "you two know each other?" run bc behind ed in that chair is just a bunch of random furniture and a chandelier like we see when ed and stede are at the market. in fact, i think ed is smoking with Anne Bonny because I think that's her hand in the corner of that shot:

-"no more booze, no more drugs, and no more _____" not sure what the end of that sentence could be but we know that the "stede" that was put in there is NOT what he actually says!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-"you two know each other?" now hold on a sec because it kinda sounds like stede met Anne Bonny and Co. separately from Ed/before that market scene (maybe in the teaser clip of Anne on Stede's lap??) WHAT IF WE GET THE AITA SCENARIO WHERE ED AND STEDE TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THEIR VERSION OF EVENTS AND NO ONE REALIZES THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT EACH OTHER UNTIL THAT MOMENT BC THEY'RE BOTH SO BIASED ABOUT ONE ANOTHER

-the evil guy definitely got his nose sliced off by Jackie. good for her :D I also don't think the evil guy is Hornigold, i'm still holding onto my theory that the man in the white rags we saw in the teaser and this trailer is hornigold's "ghost" that ed needs to contend with to find his inner peace or whatever a la stede with nigel's "ghost". but i DO think the evil guy is the rich prince dude from that leaked audition tape from rhys's friend. if memory serves, the guy wants to buy his way into the pirate lifestyle but he's pompous and entitled which makes him reckless. based off the production stills we also got today, he still had a nose when he went into Spanish Jackie's...but i don't think he leaves with one. so because he gets butthurt over invading a space that was NOT meant for him and faces the consequences of purposely disobeying their customs, he defects to the english navy and goes on a rampage against all piracy, very MRA energy :/ also, later izzy says to him "you don't know the first thing about piracy" which would further support that this guy just tried to buy his way in

-izzy gets an honest-to-god pegleg but he doesn't start the season off with it because we see him in several shots with both legs, like the wedding raid and swordfighting stede on the beach. unsure if he loses it due to infection from the toe situation or if he gets shot in the knee like i've seen some posts talk about, but @sluterastede mentioned that one of the leaked audition tapes for archie included dialogue about an amputation so maybe that character has to uh. Get Her Roach On

-as i mentioned before with the teaser analysis, izzy is clearly training stede for something and now im guessing it's the english but like we kinda knew that !

-olu is in a bar fight??

-THE "ED GETS CAUGHT IN A BUCKET ON A ROPE DURING THE STORM AND GOES OVERBOARD" THEORY IS OUT. THE "ED TIES HIMSELF TO A MF BIG ASS ROCK AND JUMPS OFF A GOD DAMN CLIFF TO GO ON SOME SOUL-SEARCHING JOURNEY UNDER THE SEA" THEORY IS IN. and what the FUCK is the rag man doing with ed up on that cliff hello?????? if my theory is correct and that is in fact hornigold's ghost or whatever, what advice or harmful shit is he saying that makes ed do that?????????????????????? but do note the large rock with the rope around it in the first pic

-the revenge crew is blowing up SOMETHING on the side of a building. maybe to cause a distraction or gain access inside the building? is it the side of Spanish Jackie's?? also hiiiiiiii lucius <3

-"our entire escape relies on this" i'm just assuming they're trying to escape from the english bc that seems to be the Big Bad of the season??

-not plot related but during the rope swinging training session izzy slaps stede on the ass and makes this face (sir??????):

>he also has his pegleg here so their mentorship may ramp up after izzy is out of commission for hand-to-hand combat. maybe izzy was supposed to have a larger fighting role alongside ed in defeating the english but once he became incapacitated he realized he would need to train someone else up for the job so ed would be sufficiently protected. but it also had to be someone izzy knew would be willing to die for ed to save his life if it came to that, just like izzy would

-"i've been a failure my whole life. it's not so bad once you get used to it" is stede talking to ed here? is that ed's hair in the corner of the frame??

>side note: as mentioned above, stede also has his earring by this point!!

-"you're going through that 'if i was a regular dude' phase" first of all, SPANISH JACKIE AND EDWARD TEACH BEST FRIENDS TRUTHERS RISE UP. second, why would ed be considered a regular dude now?? how did he lose his reputation? did he willingly give it up or was it taken from him? is this permanent or just temporary? or did he fake his own death with the cliff and the rock thing so he could retire and live a more normal life?? the swede doesn't seem scared of him at all in the final clip from the trailer, straight up asking him if he's poor and going "back to basics". of course, that could just be a power trip from being one of Jackie's newest husbands (or at least her waitstaff)

-possibly totally minor/just a continuity error thing, but: ed has a red ring. we saw it in s1 as he picks up the rather fine cashmere and we see it as ed dramatically drapes himself across the ship's helm with his head on his hand. we do not see it in the scene where he's smoking (see above) or the scene where he's talking to the rabbit. now, if you'll allow me a little bit of clownery for a moment, red has been explicitly coded in this show to be a symbol of love/the heart, especially as it pertains to edward like his red silk scarf as a metaphor for his heart in s1. what if. what if he. gave the red ring (his heart) to. SomeOne. because.....................because his heart belongs to st--[GUNSHOTS]

-olu, jim, and archie with garlic around their necks and making a cross with their fingers - clearly they think someone is a vampire on the ship. @sluterastede proposed it could be izzy, especially if he's on the brink of death due to an infection and frenchie managed to spread his superstitions to other people on the ship!

-THIS FUCKIN GUY. WHO ARE YOU??? it seems like he kidnaps stede and his crew and throws a party on the ship and drugs the drinks which is why everyone is kinda tripping/laughing in some parts. but then everyone gets tied down (stede to the mast, wee john's hands get squished, olu and roach's heads get squished, and jim and archie's feet get secured to the ship's railing i think??). also that wide shot is definitely the rando dude hitting some shrill high note at the same moment the revenge crew cry out in pain from all the squishing (except maybe jim and archie - they might just be laughing at the others bc they're badasses and this pain is nothing). also don't know what the guy is looking at when we first see him but im thinking maybe it's a wanted poster of stede and he's looking at the description of the gentleman pirate to confirm it's the dude right in front of him/that he's captured?? also i think roach is wearing flowers from the drug party in his apron when he fires that canon, so maybe he's tripping too and shoots a canon?? i need a prayer circle for the revenge's safety at this time

-stede has a bullet hole???????????????? did ed fucking shoot him in the heart?????????????????????????? he also notably does NOT have the earring in this scene but he does have the sexy stiddies (blue) shirt like we see in the other shot where he DOES have the earring. maybe this weirdo dude pierces stede's ear bc he thinks stede needs to look more piratey?? or stede gets absolutely sloshed (or drugged) and gets his ear pierced idk !!! maybe jim does it bc they're effortlessly cool and has a bunch of ear piercings!!!

-idk if this is a coincidence or not but i'm pretty sure stede in his training scenes with izzy is wearing the clothes he wore in that final shot of s1 as he rows to find the crew on the island (white linen shirt, dark pants, brown belt and boots). so either costume changes are happening later in the season, they're reusing outfits like normal people do, or the training montage happens extremely early on in the season

-so originally with the teaser trailer i thought ed falling in the water was followed by the shot of ed coming out of the water on the beach. i don't know if i fully believe that anymore because ed is NOT wearing his jacket on the cliff (see above), but he IS wearing it as he comes up out of the water, so either it's two different events and ed just spends a lot of time in the water this season or he puts his jacket on before jumping off the cliff

-ed his holding his right side as he slashes that dude on the beach so he definitely got hurt in battle but i hope it's not him getting stabbed bc ur supposed to cleverly take the sword on the left where all the unimportant bits are :(((

-I VERY STRONGLY BELIEVE that the person in the scene where stede turns around and shoots his gun into the air and everyone else on deck suddenly draws their weapons against that person is our boy lucius!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he's wearing a beret?????????? @sluterastede proposed that lucius got picked up by the english navy after getting thrown overboard and that's why we see him in the english navy garb (which we later see frenchie in too?? i believe an infiltration fuckery is afoot). also the fact that the shot immediately after this one is of Black Pete doing a happy little fist pump which i'm choosing to interpret as a cute little easter egg symbolizing Pete gets reunited with his love. i also also also believe lucius is in the shot of buttons about to zipline from one ship to the other. i missed him :')

-okay i know i said in an earlier post that stede running across the beach was romantic but i changed my mind and i think izzy is just making stede do cardio as part of his training lol. his outfit matches the one he's wearing when swordfighting izzy in that earlier wideshot and i think he even still has the scarf belt and the full beard in both scenes (explained at the end of this post via production stills) so maybe they have an honest to god training montage that takes course over several days and we get an incredible 80s powerballad to play on top of it while stede thinks of ed to motivate him or whatever. david jenkins hire me to help write season 3 i have ideas

-i think jim is behind stede as he breaks into the weirdly religious room we saw in the teaser when stede punches that guy??

-ed is pretty bloodied in the shot of stede leaning over him and saying VERY worriedly "ed????" so my theory is that ed got hurt in battle or he was taken captive by the Chinese warfleet and stede was worried he was grievously injured. however, once ed comes to and realizes who's kneeling over him, he gets pissed and headbutts stede because he's still mad at him for breaking his heart, and maybe his hands are restrained/his body is too weak so he can't push stede away. or maybe they had to begrudgingly work together on some mission and stede fucked it up and ed got hurt so he's mad about that idk!! ALSO HE'S WEARING THE CRAVAT HELLO

-ed in buttons's shirt looking so PEACEFUL what the HELL. obviously it's from the same general time as him being in Spanish Jackie's when she's talking to him about being a regular dude and later when the swede asks him if he's poor addkjfajdfhlkefh i fucking love this show and its writing so much. but ed says "no, i'm just trying something different man >:/" so i wonder if this is ed at the end of s2 or if this is more towards the middle as he's still in the thick of his healing journey. maybe buttons teaches ed about meditation and/or the tai chi he practiced with the Chinese warfleet crew??

-the BTS production still of ed with his "trust no one" tattoo also features what i believe is the treasure chest we see jim carrying off the ship in the shot where fang is smashing two dudes' heads together!

-i also think the BTS production still of stede with the beard is early on in ep 1 because he has a full beard (that im hoping someone on the revenge bullies him into shaving off to the scruff we see in the rest of the promo materials) and ALSO because he's wearing a long red scarf around his waist, which we never see again in any of the other promo material - except, however, around his neck as a makeshift cravat:

>it's the same exact material and everything! my guess is he gets his ass handed to him in a fight (maybe against izzy??) and his scarf belt gets destroyed, so he repurposes the shredded fabric into his necktie

-there's literal gold bars in the background of this production still lmao the kraken crew got BUSY during ed's goth era

>speaking of, the fucking hair dye dripping down izzy's forehead in this production still:

*sad clown noises*

in conclusion:

WE'RE BACK BABEYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

anyway that's my second dissertation on less than 2 minutes of content that turned out to be quite literally 6 pages long :)

#ofmd #our flag means death #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #edward teach #stede bonnet #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd season 2 #ofmd s2 trailer #izzy hands #the swede #spanish jackie #jim jimenez #oluwande boodhari #wee john feeney #ofmd spoilers #i don't know what i need to be evaluated for but it's SOMETHING and it's PREVALENT #i spent a collective 5 hours making this post what the whole actual fuck

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zaceouiswriting · 2 years ago

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Easy corruption of the straight, human torch

Character: Johnny Storm x male reader, mentioned Dr. Richard Reed

Universe: Fantastic four/Marvel

Warnings: Smut, a little bit of fluff

Authors note: Here I am again, with another part of a request. Please forgive me @innerpiratefun , but I had to break your request into three pieces. It just didn't feel right to only write your request (Which will be the third/last part of this mini-series), but I had to give it some more context and a little bit of story. Of course, with a lot of smut. But here is the first part. Hopefully, you and everyone else will enjoy it! PS. This is Chris Evans as Johnny Storm.

A while after the Fantastic Four awakened their powers, another experiment with government intervention failed. As the lead scientist, Dr. Reed was devastated because one of the test subjects was a promising young man in his early twenties.

After the machine exploded, everyone assumed you were dead, but you weren’t. In contrast, the experiment was actually more than a success. After Susan's death, they needed someone like her to keep Johnny in check and ensure the team always had someone to protect everyone.

However, the experiment was more successful than anyone thought possible. Despite gaining the ability to become invisible and making force fields, you also got telekinesis and something that nobody liked.

„Dr.Reed, I had no idea your thoughts about me are so… dirty.“ Your voice echoed in the doctor's head. Confused and fearful, his head turned in all directions, but he couldn't see the origin of your voice. His hot tears still rolled down his face.

Even with his arms reaching out and touching everything in the room, he couldn't find you. But your voice was so close that it made him furious. Maybe your loss made him finally go insane. Suddenly, he felt something touching him. Pulling his hands back, he tried to find the source of the touching but couldn’t find it anywhere either.

„Aehmmm… Dr. Reed?“ Your voice sounded desperate. Voice quickly got his attention. „There is a small problem.“ Stating that, he looked around again. Glancing through the now windowless windows to the room the experiment had been going on, he saw that the roof was completely gone, and high up in the air, there were you. „Could you get me down? I have no idea how to control this.“

Laughing. You suddenly could hear laughing? Looking down, just at the corner of your sight, there was Dr. Reed, belly laughing about your predicament.

All the while, you began to float away, far into the sky, panicking, trying to somehow make sense of your strange new abilities.

Even minutes later, there was no try from anyone to get you back down to the floor. The doctor forced to experiment on you and with whom you had a strange relationship did nothing.

Believing that your fate was already sealed, you just let it be, spreading your body out to maybe fall onto someone when your body is frozen, like a meaty star.

You hadn't heard or felt warmth coming close to you. „Hey there, you need help?“ A slightly arrogant voice asked with a chuckle. Looking over, you saw Dr. Reed’s friend.

Shaking your head, you looked back up to the sky you were getting close to. „Not really, I like the sight, and it's rather...comfortable. Who can say that they died flying to the stars?“

You swore that you could hear his eyeballs roll back. „God, just like my sister, maybe I just should let you die.“ He mumbled done with your attitude.

Showing your hand to him as a symbol for him to just shut up, his warmth suddenly vanished. Confused if that idiot was really going to let you die there, your head jerked in his direction only to see him fall instead of flying. Around him, a force field.

Even more panicking than before, you stretched your hand out again, thinking that this would solve the problem but no. He was still falling, his flames still gone, and the floor came awfully close to him.

With your head everywhere, but solving this problem, you suddenly felt a relatively strong flow of air underneath you. Just wanting to look around, you could move out of nowhere. Not statically flying up to the stars anymore, barely able to move at all. Seeing that you were falling not, but the torch flying back up, away from me, your body just gave up. As blackness surrounded you, all you could do at that point was accept your coming death.

Just sad to know that the government would take another person and subject them to the same destructive process you had to go through. But that wasn’t your problem anymore.

„God, Johnny, look out for your fucking flank! What are you doing?“

„Trusting in you, handsome!“ He called back, smug as he was.

Rolling your eyes, you telepathically told him that you will, punish him later for his stupidity. All I got back was a fantasy of him being tied to a cross and flogged, only to have a cold touch on his red, warm, and bruised skin that hurt even more than the whipping. But it felt so good for him.

Blushing at his obscenely dirty thoughts, amid a mighty struggle, you realized you were too soft on him. On the fly, you decided to teach him a lesson. As a plasma blast hit his side as he became careless again, he was thrown straight in your direction. His powers were down because of the immense pain.

Catching him with ease, you cradled him softly in your arms. „What the fuck, man!“ He brought out through gritted teeth. Anger and hurt are audible in his hissing voice. „See it as foreplay, Johnny. Because if I get my hands on you later, I will break the rest of your little, dirty soul. Fucking little pig.“ You whispered the last part in his ear. As always, your hot breath sent cold sweats down his back as he remembered the first time you completely ravaged his hole.

You and Richard split just months after the older doctor accepted your advances. Finally, realizing that you two could not get intimate as he needed it, considering neither of you would put your ass on the line.

Johnny has been flirting with you since you became part of the team, touching you, even giving you little kisses on the neck, or licking your ear. It didn't change when you and Richard became a couple. In contrast, things got worse. Openly grabbing your ass or crotch, but mostly your ass.

That day though, he even put his hand in your pants because he had hurt about you and Richard breaking up, thinking he could get you finally inside his bed. Because you never pushed him away, he thought you would like it. How could you? Johnny was one of the two most attractive men you have ever seen. But when his pointy finger touched your hole, you punched him square in his face.

Tumbling steps back, he suddenly couldn’t feel the floor underneath his feet anymore. He also wasn’t able to move any part of his body. „You are seriously a fucking pig. It is finally time to show you that I won’t take this shit anymore!“

Walking outside the kitchen we were in, with him floating in front of me, your presence was to be felt all over his body. Making him hard in a second made him moan like a little slut, but it didn't get interesting until much of your power concentrated on his butt to prime him. Suddenly his slightly deeper voice became high-pitched.

„What are you- Nghhh…A-Ahhh- are you doing?“

„You will see soon enough, easy slut.“ He tried harder to free himself from my invisible grip on him. But nothing worked, he was already too far gone to use his own powers, which might have given him a chance against you, but now he was just that, what he, in reality, was, butter in your hands.

Put him in his room, locked the door, and even put up a force barrier so no one could open it. You threw him onto his bed and held him in place with your powers, only to get whatever you could find to tie him to his bed.

Bound to the posts of his bed, he almost immediately tried to burn it away again. Just for nothing to happen. A devilish grin spread across your face as he realized with shock that he was at your mercy. His face had fallen into disbelief, making you even harder under your tight pants. „Hey dude, I’m sorry, okay? You are just so hot, and I thought playing with you would be nice.“

„Oh, it was nice, but now it is my time to play with you.“ You lasciviously lick your lips seductively with your tongue, your hands slowly wandering over Johnny's clothed body. „God, your body is a dream.“ Punching his rock-hard abs and chest, he let out a couple of suppressed moans, obviously meant for you, but was not willing to reveal them just yet to you.

It only got worse as your fingers completely ignored his raging boner, just gently stroking it. Only to quickly travel down to his throbbing hole that begged to be touched, slightly open, smiling at you. So you obliged. Circle his soft pink hole with your left hand, gently inserting your pinky, only to be surprised that it sinks already in easily. Your sickly grin widened even more when you remembered that you had already opened it slightly on your way to his play bed.

Looking up at Jonny, pure panic could be read on his face, scrunched together in ecstasy. „Apparently, I have to show your place, you little whore, do I?“

„Please!“ His plead was spoken without a breath, so quietly that you could’ve easily missed it if you weren’t so focused on his lips.

Your sadistic smile faltered into one full of sympathy. Leaning over him, your face was barely over this. The fact that you were a bit taller than this demigod of man certainly made it easier.

What little air he could manage to take in was gone when you caught his lips with yours. Both of you stared at the other as it happened. You, because at that moment Johnny was just a toy to get your frustration out, and he because he was surprised. But he closed his eyes rather quickly, realizing what was happening.

This man you saw regularly fucking women, a real womanizer, was beneath you, trembling under your gentle touch and begging you never to stop. And yet, you could only see his flesh, the lust he could provide you.

You still hovered over him after that first chaste kiss, after you separated from him. Lips dangerously close to his, but never touching. All the while, your fingers danced around his hole.

But as your thumb finally found its way into him, a gasp sounded from his lips. His hands grabbed the cloth you'd used to tie him to the bed. His body went rigid. Eyes bulging, disbelief in them, tears pooling in their corners.

„God, you are so tight around my thumb. Are you a virgin, Jonnyboy?“ Not a single word left his mouth. It just stood open in shock. But the little sounds he made were everything you needed to know. He could see you smirking, he dissolving at your touch. Trying to stay strong, he closed his mouth, sternly glancing back into your eyes.

Your smoky quickly became that of a predator, now with a goal in its head. Carefully you pulled your thumb out of him. Feeling him try to move back on it made you grin even wider. He only had a small taste and already couldn’t get enough. A straight womanizer like him had to think about taking it up the ass a lot. Otherwise, he would never have given up that quickly.

Or maybe, he is just finding out about this side of himself and can’t make sense of it, losing himself as it was happening.

For a long moment, you did not touch him at all, only hovering a bit closer over his body. Your eyes warningly glared at him, not wanting him to move. Even without saying a word or using your powers, he knew what you wanted, and he did it out of fear of what would happen if he didn't.

Soon enough, happy with his submission, your hand, which was not holding you over him, wandered up and down his body, massaging his chest again, pinching his nipple, which got a welcoming yelp out of him, which you noted you needed to hear much more often.

Everything changed, however, when the same hand ran down his leg, gently stroking the inner part, approaching his balls only to ignore them and soon after reaching his hole. He got restless, tried to move, and even had the audacity to kiss you.

Angry that he broke his goody boy attitude this quickly, your hand was around his neck in a heartbeat. „What was that?“ You asked in a low tone. Even quieter than your voice usually was. One of the main things men typically fall onto their knees for you is your deep voice. Despite your muscular body, this is much more important. Your piercing eyes, judging, made the rest. But as soon as those same people, willing to serve you, open your pants, they try to get out of it.

Johnny was no different. With ease, you ripped away one of the pieces of cloth binding him to the bed, took his hand, and bought it down to your pants. Opening it, you pushed his hand underneath your underwear. His eyes nearly bulged out of his head.

„As a punishment, you fucking impatient, little whore, I will only use spit on you. We will see how long your cocky attitude holds with that.“

Terror the only thing visible on his face. But Johnny couldn't do anything. His brain, which was only working half the time anyway, had shorted out. Before he could wrap his head around things, his other arm was free too, but his face was pressed into his pillow, with his back to you.

With one hand on the back of his head, you held his head even though you theoretically didn't need your hand, but it felt more natural that way. You liked to feel his worry as he tried to free it.

Your own head was already on his ass, with his pants completely ripped off his body with your powers. Now everything was open to you, especially his perfect peach ass. You just had to, so you bit into it. Another yelp could be heard, muffled through the pillow. Even more exotic and foremost erotic than the last, quickly forcing you to bite into it again and again. Only when dozens of bite marks could be seen on his ass, now reddish from your treatment, did you stop. Licking his ass from side to side, your middle finger found its way right into his hole without much need of searching rather than accidentally hitting the point. With a loud moan, embarrassed in nature, he came.

Since you never touched his cock, and neither could he, he just came from your finger when you hit his prostate. It made you grin even wider. „Let's see how many times I can make you little slut cum before I completely destroy your little hole. How does that sound?“

Nothing more than a tormented groan could be heard. It was quickly followed by a long moan as your tongue touched the pink hole for the first time. Every resolve he had vanished into thin air. In particular, when you used your fingers to open it wide enough to really dig deep in with your tongue.

Under normal circumstances, you never would’ve done this with a straight guy for a big reason. Johnny does not have these problems though he literally burns everything away. Therefore he is always clean.

You found yourself enjoying it much more than you had initially thought. I've always liked licking a nice hole, but this was different. It tasted delicious. You had to take a deep breath away from his hole for a second, but you needed more with both hands now on his peachy ass. But you needed more of that, so you went all the way in with your tongue and fingers to open his ass up for you. Face deep between his lovely cheeks, massaging them and even slapping them every now and then if you're not wiggling them when you need to take a breather.

Johnny was on cloud nine the entire time. He came three more times, his cock never getting touched.

Pulling him a little up, you finally took your cock out of your tight underwear. It was heavy, big, and long in your hand. You've always been big down there, but it's only gotten bigger since the experiment, especially in girth and length.

The moment I slapped it on his peachy ass, Johnny suddenly began to tremble but dared a glance back. Fear was written over his handsome face. Even though he was a few years older than you, he looked so mature with his brown stubble, but deep down; he was more immature than anyone you've ever met.

To See him really scared for the first time since you knew him made your cock throb on his ass curve. „Okay, okay, that is-that is enough now, we can tal-“ He came up slightly to say this. But it was already too late for him.

Aggressively you pushed his head back into the pillows, holding it there. Slowly you bend over his body, your own muscular body, which is already taut thanks to the training you're receiving. Feeling his muscular back on your abs was heaven for you, but to feel the sweat that had accumulated all over his body, making it easy to rub yourself on it, almost made you fuck his ass cheeks and not his hole. Maybe another time in which you aren’t this pent up.

Lie on his back and position your head next to his. Your mouth gently nibbles his ear as your tongue explores new zones of pleasure. Especially his earlobe was extremely sensitive, making him moan and groan in response, as well as moving a lot. Feeling his ass cheeks pulling your cock inside almost drove you mad with lust. „I knew you wanted that, you little bitch. I will breed you so well. Maybe I will even impregnate you.“ Chuckling over your own joke, you put a hand over his stomach. „Pumping you full with my fucking cum.“

As you were still talking, you could feel his hole opening as his body relaxed. Realizing that he was already entirely gone by this point: you slowly slide your cock deeper inside him. Your massive cock head slid in easily. But you stopped anyway to make sure Johnny wasn't in pain.

But the good little boy made no sound except moans of joy, a lost, happy smile on his blank face. His eyes had not a glimmer of intelligence anymore.

A proud expression crosses your face as you realize you're good enough to empty this handsome man's pretty little head.

You seized the moment of his stupidity, and to put all of your massive cock inside him, enough spit had entered his hole by eating it out to sink in with ease. There was nothing more but an exaggerated moan. But the heat and tightness of his wonderful hole took you by surprise. You came almost on the spot after just getting into his hole. For a second, you felt like a pathetic rookie. But thanks to this, your orgasm did not happen. Your mind was too preoccupied. After taking a few deep breaths, you sat in his hole with your big cock for some time. Contemplating when to move.

Your hands wandered, no, slide your hands heavily down his back. Your rough hands could feel every muscle, bone, and heartbeat, deeply massaging his back. Johnny was nothing but a fleshlight for you.

The moment your cock head had pushed past his prostate, another orgasm went over Johnny’s body, letting his ass squeeze your big cock so nicely. „God, you are sucking me in…Aghhh, fucking whore.“ For the first time, you slapped him. Finalizing the light in which you saw him. The moan that had ripped from his lips, as your skin hurt his, was more than music in your ears.

Agonizingly, you didn't move even though you and your body wanted nothing more than to ravage this cocky little cock whore.

But you managed to keep yourself from hurting him with sudden, brutal movements. Instead, you breathing heavily, put your hand around the front of his neck, gripping it hard enough to stop his airflow.

Finally, a reaction came from him, but only weakly. His hands tried halfheartedly to pry mine from his neck, but his intention was more than clear. He liked it, no, the fucking whore loved it even.

You pulled him up until his head was lightly on your shoulder. His back arched almost unnaturally. Taking your hand from his neck, he took hasty breaths before passing out. But your entire arm replaced your hand. „Hmm, do you like my muscles, whore?“ You asked him, whispering in his red ear, the same that you had nibbled on a while ago. „Does it feel good to submit to a real man? I bet it does!“

After much whining from him, you finally moved, just for Johnny to cum again. At this point, nothing came out; he was empty, not only his head but also his balls, thanks to you emptying him fully. Even his tensing up muscles and therefore moving intestines had much of an effect on you anymore. Everything was just so low at this point. His body is obviously at the end of its energy.

„We are not finished here, my little whore. I still have to completely fill you up with my cum, remember?“ I asked him as I softly spoke to him, never stopping my already brutal pace inside him.

„Bu-But-But I can-can’t any… more- Ahhhhh!“ He suddenly screamed after I put my hand on his stomach, piston fucking into him like some ice-cold machine. Feeling your cock thrusting against your hand through his stomach was too much for you at that moment as you came like a fountain deep inside Johnny.

Let him fall into the warm, cozy bed. Even though you just came, the lust was still immense. But you wanted him to feel safe and secure, going so far as to stroke his aching back, caress his cheek, and even give him a few meaningless kisses all over his back.

Only when you could feel him relaxing too much, to brutally start to fuck him again. „You really thought I would let you go that easy, huh? How cute. Now I will show you how bold slut’s like you should get treated!“

It took you hours to fully empty your heavy balls, which hadn’t seen sex in months to deplete. Every single drop in Johnny, or most of it. At that time, a lot already covered his bed after you'd fucked him hard enough to squeeze most of it out again.

After cumming about six times, you fell onto Jonny’s back. Heavily breathing and sweating profusely. Somehow he was still awake, even though barely. „Can I sleep now, sir?“ He asked out of his mind.

Shocked about him calling you something so formal, it quickly dawned on you. He, in fact, was a submissive shithead and finally wanted to be put in his place, something no man had ever done or been able to do before.

Without him having to say anything or you having to ask a single question, you knew he would be yours for as long as you desire, a sex toy. You gently pulled your slowly limp-going cock out of him and rolled to the side. Immediately open up your sweaty arms. Johnny, first reluctantly, found his way into them. But as soon as he felt your warmth and could breathe in your musky scent, he was a goner, dumbly smiling into your chest as he almost fell asleep.

Once again, he looked up at you, out of tired eyes, still awaiting your answer, further cementing his wish for you to be whatever he needed. „Go to sleep, baby boy. I can’t have you exhausted when I want to use your sweet hole tomorrow again, now can I?“ He blushed ferociously at his new nickname. Maybe you'll use a different one in the future, but for now, Johnny would get this one, showing what he was to you, a good boy.

All the while, none of you had noticed the elongated eyes watching your every move with excitement, taking advantage of your pornographic use of Johnny's body to satisfy his own desires.

[Masterlist]

#Fantastic four #fantastic four x male reader #fantastic four imagine #marvel #marvel imagine #marvel x male reader #x male reader #male reader #male reader imagine #x male reader imagine #Johnny Storm #Johnny Storm x male reader #Johnny Storm imagine #Smut

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tia-amorosa · 1 month ago

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Sunset Died - Sword/Hatch

The Wedding(-Crasher) (Part 2)

The cake was indeed something special on this day. It was not very sweet, but had a pleasant taste of berries. Emma had boiled them down a while ago and used them for today's occasion. “Really good. I think that's the best today.” Pauline looked over at her plate and grinned, “as quickly as you ate your piece, I think so too, hnhn”.

While Cyclone and Blair's wedding reception is in full swing, someone elsewhere is frantically making their way to get help. “Shit, why did it have to start now, I thought we still had time…”. Cries of pain could be heard far away.

The atmosphere at the party was quite relaxed. Someone had switched on their smartphone and played a playlist. It was a colorful mix, including some slow tracks. You had to take advantage of that. “I've been practicing a bit more"/ ”really? Well then show me if you've become a good dancer, hnhn”.

As Boyd's wife was still busy with the cake, he asked Emma for a short dance. He wanted to use the moment to thank her for taking such good care of his daughter during this difficult time. “Thank you, but it was a matter of course for me to look after her. She's like a sister to me"/ ‘hnhn, that makes me happy’.

Let loose and enjoy the rest of the day. That was actually the plan. Pauline said goodbye and went home, while Xander had to finish the dance with Morgana. It was a nice get-together - until the peace and quiet was interrupted.

A few moments later. Nick Alto stormed with quick steps towards the barn where the party was taking place. He knew there was an event here today, but he had to find a place where there were a lot of people. “My God, Mr. Alto, what…"/ ”Is Dr. Wolff here? I need to see her urgently!”

And at the same time, the commotion began when some of the guests saw him. “What are you doing here, huh? You don't show your face for ages and then…”, but Nick immediately defended himself. “I don't have time to explain right now, I need Dr. Wolff!"/ ‘I'm here…’. Morgana came running out of the background and saw that he was quite out of breath. “What happened?”.

Susan was surprised and annoyed at the same time. “That he's showing up here today, of all days, at our daughter's wedding"/ ‘Well, it seems to be something important… Look at him, he's a mess, what's going on there?’. Morgana supported Nick for a moment until he could catch his breath. “Now tell me, what happened?"/ ‘He should tell us why first…’/ ”Quiet, damn it!”...

After the confusion of everyone's chatter died down, Nick continued, panting slightly. “I know everything is getting out of hand here at the moment, but I need your help now, Dr. … Vita, she's gone into labor, too early actually, and she's in tremendous pain, please, help us!” / ‘What??’.

“Your wife… is pregnant?”. Everyone in the room was visibly surprised and also a little shocked. No one had noticed anything yet. How could they, she hadn't been out for months. “I… I know you must all have lots of questions and I'll answer them eventually, but please… Something's not right…”. Morgan's head was foggy for a moment, but then the doctor in her came out. “I'm coming…”.

Even the bride and groom had not expected such an event on this day. “Phew. That was a very surprising wedding crasher“/”indeed. Did any of you notice anything? That Vita is pregnant?"/ ‘No. I haven't seen her once since we got back here’/ ”I wonder why she's been keeping her pregnancy a secret all this time? She might be older, but that's no reason to hide."/ Blair shook his head. “Anyway, the party's over. Let's go home.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

End of this Part

@greenplumbboblover 😊

Poses by: @poses-by-bee, @natalia-auditore (mika's pain)

#sims3 #screenshots #simsstories #ts3 story #ts3 gameplay #sunset died #post apocalyptic #wedding day #blair sword #cycl0n3 sw0rd #susan wainwright #boyd wainwright #emma hatch #xander clavell #connor frio #judy bunch #nick alto

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nerdyvocals · 1 year ago

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Final round of episode quotes as @look-at-those-niceass-rocks and I finished our final watch party. Once again, the cast and crew are in the house, so @saveourpinks, please enjoy. (You can find previous posts with more unhinged quotes here and here)

Honorable mention from before we actually started, them waking their husband up with: wake up, it's time for me to see gay shit

Second honorable mention, a conversation had while I struggled with my audio: Them: I tried to show [Husband] Merely Players last night but he was too tired Me: I can't believe your husband is homophobic Them: I AGREE Husband, distantly: I don't deserve this!

(about Buddy) God his shoulders, he's built like a Dorito

(this is specifically in reference to episode 8 but honestly, this was said multiple times throughout our watching) Me: WHAT DOES ANY OF THIS HAVE TO DO WITH COMMUNISM??? Them: It's the 50s! If it ain't American, it's communist!

Me: I love that Buddy's dad's name is Dick Them: It was a choice

(In reference to Blandiels) He makes me SO uncomfortable. Like I know that that's the point but he's so slimy-NO NO STOP, STOP KISSING HER, FUCK-!

(roughly three minutes of us screaming over Lydia's Woman Scorned (tm) dress, followed by another three minutes of us laughing at the faces everyone was making when I pause the video)

(about Susan's mom) Me: Heinous fucking bitch Them: What. A raging. CUNT.

(after we both spent a Hot Minute thirsting over Cynthia dancing on the car) Them: I talk a big game but if I was within five feet of this person, I would be just staring and stammering Husband, distantly: We know honey Them: SHUT UP

(both of us wheezing over CGI!Richie)

Cops: *show up* Us: *John Mulaney voice* SCATTER

Them: NOT THE LINE I'VE LOST THE ONE I LOVE THE MOST AS SHE PICKS UP OLIVIA'S JACKET Me: They are simply In Love

Them: He's gonna do something stupid, I can feel it. Me: You don't know the half of it! Them: He's gonna propose to a teenager! (okay maybe they do know the half of it, fuckin' prophet)

Me: *reading off episode titles as it starts storming where I am* And this one is called You're Dropping Out of Rydell- thank you dramatic thunder???

(honorable mention, me being unable to tell what was real thunder and what was from the episode)

Them: I'm not emotionally ready for this Me: Me neither and I've seen it like eight times already

Nancy: *dramatic exit* Them: She's so dramatic and I respect her and only her

Me: I love you singing along to a theme song with no lyrics Them: Sometimes I just gotta make funky little noises!

(About Nicholson) I am going to break that man's ball sack with a driver.

Them: It's giving pouty little bitch Me: Which one? (referring to Buddy and his dad) Them: Yes

Cynthia: *walks in in Richie's Jacket* Me: Hello my name is Single and Gay Them: I am not single but I am gay and I think... I don't think, I have no thoughts, head empty

(About McGee, then the scene transitions to Daniels) Them: The only adult in this school I respect- I AM GOING TO KILL HIM WITH MY BARE HANDS! Me, wheezing: What about your human hands? Them: THOSE TOO

(said in the most disgusted voice I've ever heard) Of course he likes Walt Whitman

Them: [Husband], I'm killing the pedophile, wanna help? Husband: Let's be honest, do you really need my help? Them: Someone's gotta drive the car.

Them: "Feelings central?" I bet you were feeling sensual when you were making out with Olivia-LYDIA on your couch earlier Me: ...You good there? Them: The names are too close

(Face to Face begins) Ah, dramatic acapella is my gender

Me: Once again, love how much you hate Buddy Them: He's had so many chances to earn my respect and he has done nothing!

Guardian Demon: *appears* Them: What. The fuck. Is happening? Me: BEAUTY SCHOOL DROPOUT BABEY

(@ Buddy) Them: He's not a total ding-dong. Just like 80% Me: He did just thank her (Susan) for having sex with him Them: ...85%

(About the Red Sox analogy) Cynthia giving me Gender Euphoria with one sentence

Nancy: *talking about love stories, mentions Shy Guy* Both of us: *Cackling at the full-body never mind Cynthia does*

Nancy: Tell anyone of my vulnerable nature and I will deny it until the day I die! Them: FUCKING MOOD like I know I was literally also just crying but we're gonna move past that, I'm a bad bitch again

Me: Finale time! Any thought or predictions before we get started? Them: Leonard gets arrested and as he's being taken away, he gets hit by a semi truck- Me: What is this, Mean Girls??? Them: Yes! McGee punches the principal in the face and defeats him in blood combat and cements her place as principal- Me: *slowly dissolving into horrified laughter* Them: Cynthia gets to kiss Lydia again, which is all I really need to be happy, and terrifying CGI Richie comes back and does the Macarena! Me: *can't start the episode for five minutes because I'm laughing too hard*

(Ten seconds in) PAUSE THIS I HAVE BEEF THERE IS NO FUCKING WAY OF GETTING MARRIED THAT QUICKLY IN A CATHOLIC CHURCH

(after rant) Me: Yeah but the tensions wouldn't be as high if they had six months to stop the wedding! Them: ...there are two wolves inside of me, one says valid, and one is formerly Catholic and Upsetti

Me: I want a shirt that says "I have two wolves inside of me, one of them is Catholic" and nothing else Them: *WHEEZE*

Cynthia: He's just. Some guy. Both of us, in sync: HIT HIM WITH YOUR CAR

"Old Soul" is groomer for "Fuckable"

(@ Gil climbing in through the window) Me: On the one hand, I'd fold, on the other? Terrifying! Them: YES! Me: Although I guess if I had the rapport with someone that they have?? Maybe?? Like good in media, bad in real life. Them: Gil? Yes, absolutely. Edward Cullen? Fuck no! The two genres of climbing through my window

(after the drag race) YET ANOTHER THING BUDDY DID NOT EARN

Me: Hey, do you have tissues? Them (afraid): ...should I get some??? Me: Maybe Them: I don't think I have any in the house??? Me: Ah! You're fucked!

*ten minute interlude of us crying over the Coming Out Scene, discussing what it means to both of us, and how furious we are of future generations not getting to see the best queer rep of our lifetimes if this show doesn't get saved. On that note, sign the petition if you haven't already.*

THEY STARTED BY STEALING A CAR THEY WILL SAVE THE FRIENDSHIP BY STEALING A CAR

Oh someone please hit hi- YESSSSS!!!

(at the start of All In) Me: She (Cynthia) is going to cry Them: I'm going to cry Me: I'm already crying

Me: Lydia is stronger than I am I would already be on my knees. (note I use a cane and sometimes a wheelchair, if I am on my knees I Will Not be Getting Up)

Me: Hopelessly Devoted walked so this song could fucking run Them: I WAS ABOUT TO SAY THE SAME THING

Pink Ladies: *Offer Hazel a jacket* Them: *aggressively close to the mic* That sounds very gay I'm in

Them: I cannot take my eyes off Jane. Like they are all very beautiful right now but there's something about her- Me: It's the bisexual energy Them: ...Dammit, you're right

Rizzo: We'll start our own gang! Them: With blackjack and hookers!

(Introduction of Frankie Zuko) Them: I'm sorry, HUH???

(As credits roll) Me: So, how we feelin'? Them: Normal, I am so normal, I am feeling so fucking normal about this. Me: Thoughts? Them: *incoherent screaming*

We had some much fun doing these, we decided to keep a quotes list for more movie nights. Next up, Julie and the Phantoms!

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gnrbitch · 1 year ago

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Grunge Days pt.17 - Estranged

Warnings: Physical violence, drug mention

Lowkey trigger warning on the violence

————

1992, Los Angeles

Y/n ran her hands through her hair, putting her luggage down onto the floor. Alice had just finished mixing their record, so now they just had to get the cover done and they would be able to release it.

Upon their arrival back to LA, Y/n was filled with this hollowness in her body. She was okay during most of the making of the record, but now she had nothing to distract her from her fucked up life.

Downstairs, Jerry opened the door to see a very fucked up Duff.

“Where’s Y/n” He asked Jerry, his voice strained.

Jerry’s eyebrows furrowed, “She’s upstairs, why?”

Jerry turned back to look at Duff, who just stormed pass him. “Jeez” Jerry mumbled to himself.

Y/n jumped as she looked at Duff, who had slammed her bedroom door shut.

He paced to the side of the bed where she was sitting on, the girls heart racing because he looked pissed.

Duff raised his hand, slapping her across the face. “You fucken idiot!” He yelled

Y/ns eyes teared up as she put her hand against her face, “what the fuck Duff” she said, her voice cracking.

And the next thing she knew, Duff had his hands wrapped around her throat, she laid on her bed as he strangled her.

She attempted to pry his hands off her, her tears falling off the side of her face. She couldn’t breath, she was fucken mortified.

“Duff” She said, trying to breath,

“I fucken told you Y/n” He said “I told you that if you ever touched another fucken needle i was gonna kick your ass!” He yelled.

As she looked into his eyes, silently pleading for him to let go of her, she saw nothing. No remorse, no Duff.

This was it she thought, she was gonna fucken die, and Duff was gonna be the one to kill her.

Huh, who would’ve thought.

That was until Jerry and Layne bursted through the door. To be honest, they heard Duff yelling and they thought it was weird that Y/n wasn’t yelling back, so they decided to see what was going on. And they were so glad they did.

“Duff let her go” Layne said as him and Jerry attempted to pull Duff off of Y/n. “Sean!” Layne called out.

“What the fuck” Sean said as he entered the room, immediately grabbing Duff and ripping him off of Y/n.

“What’s your fucken issue!” Sean yelled at Duff as Layne rushed to Y/ns side.

“Y/n” Layne said

Y/n was hyperventilating, her fingers lightly touching her throat as she cried.

Duffs eyes widened when he looked at his baby sister, what the fuck had he done? “Oh my god Y/n i’m sorry”

“Get him out” Y/n said, her voice barley coming through.

Sean grabbed him by his shirt, dragging him out of the room as Duff protested and repeatedly apologized.

“Just let me talk to her” Duff cried to Sean as they were now standing outside “Please man i didn’t mean to do this, I-i fucken blacked out”

“Get the fuck out” Sean said, shoving him.

“No- no that’s my sister” Duff stuttered out, running his hand down his face

Sean scoffed at him, walking back into the house and locking the door. As much as he wanted to kick Duffs ass, he mainly wanted to see if Y/n was okay.

Sean walked back into Y/ns room, her head laying on Laynes lap as Jerry was sitting on the floor.

Sean kneeled down, looking at Y/n “I’m so glad you didn’t die” he said

Y/n cracked a smile as a tears fell out of her eyes “Me too” she croaked.

“We were saying we should call Susan” Jerry spoke up.

“Is that okay?” Sean asked Y/n

Y/n nodded her head slightly, and Sean & Jerry left the room.

Y/n removed herself from Laynes lap, she looked at him as she whispered, “I can’t do this anymore Layne”

Layne looked at her, his eyes watery “Don’t say that”

“Everything is too complicated” She said “I just need a break”

“We’ll get you a break okay? We could go anywhere you want” Layne held her “Just please don’t leave me” He whispered

Y/n clung onto him tightly “I won’t” she whispered

————

No this was too crazy

Tagged: @deeznutsworld @hoodiesandicedcoffee @eddiiiieeee @killazilla777

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theskyexists · 5 months ago

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So why the snow? Why did the memory change? Why did the Doctor cry? Why can't he remember? Why couldn't anyone see her face?? No explanations for this in the episode. So rewrite. (Also wish it hadn't been just four mostly disconnected mysteries and mystery women (Mrs Flood, Susan Triad, ruby’s mother, the woman in 73 yards).)

We're doing that rtd theme: the most ordinary woman in the world is the most important but we make it make sense. The mundane should not exist BESIDE the magic, the magic should elevate the mundane.

Basically the essence is that Ruby broke that piece of time using the time window when it shorted in ep 1. And the dusting of Unit and all the panic in the streets is moved towards the end of ep 1. And Sutek has a voice over about how every Susan in every place that The Doctor’s ever landed is destroying life now. And it's all the Doctor’s fault (And there's no scene where the Doctor and Sutek have a slow and boring conversation and standoff).. And the Doctor storms into the time window and uses the memory TARDIS and that bit of cracked time to place them outside time. ‘this eddy, this crack, this memory of time. YOU made it Ruby Sunday when you broke the the time window, because you looked so so hard. All so you might be able to see your mother's face. That's why this little bit of time is so strong, it comes through everywhere, snow, singing, and so broken, muddled, even I can't remember. And THATS because… I am cracking open this little bit of memorytime and pulling us through beyond it RIGHT NOW.’ Goes on about how maybe, if theyre lucky, they’re not affected by Sutek’s power if they can just get THROUGH because it's just slightly out of true with time.And Ruby and Mel remember the TARDIS for him and he tries to remember the night. And then he tries to take off and the thing half explodes and the time window disappears and all that's left is the scene hanging in the darkness of nothing.

Ep 2

The beginning is the Doctor arriving at the dying woman's place and getting the spoon. Great atmosphere, establishes immediately that everything has gone to shit, and things are DIRE. And things have changed drastically, we are in a new world and there are things we don't know about the story because of this.

Then the Doctor RUNS towards the Tardis and dives in. He barely makes it as it's already dematerialising and it is still on fire. Ruby and Mel and him try to tie everything together and the spoon makes it work. Fire extinguisher. They barely make it, the Tardis takes off roughly and langs rougher. they're pulled back to the cracked moment in time, a frozen moment of that night hanging out in nothing. Exposition Doctor: now they've fixed the TARDIS a bit they should be able to do longer hops out into reality. Closed the doors back up and they go into a hop we get the scene in space where the dust races across the continents. The Doctor despairs. First the flux and now this, he's a virus after all, a parasite, he's killed the universe (this is about adoption, so please refer to tecteun !!). Ruby and Mel say: no. This wasn't you. But he says: It's me!! It's me!! I came here and it's happening because of me everything I ever touched. And there's nothing! Nothing I can do!!! He probably screams.

Scene with Ruby sitting in cracked time, crying about Carla and Cherry. The Doctor sees it, sits next to her. Ruby: says and i STILL dont know who she is, laughs. Like it matters now. The Doctor goes: why not, its the end of the universe, lets go. Lets go who cares if we cross our own timelines now! Ruby's like: won't she be dust. The Doctor says: maybe, but she's special, this place in time is special. They try but the Memory TARDIS will not go.

Sutek probably shouldn't get a scene but if he does he shouldn't be worried about Ruby, he should be like: the Lord of Time, they say he's immortal, that he came from beyond the universe like my siblings the gods. How did he escape? All of time and space is dead!

Back to the Doctor and Ruby, they have the screen, the Doctor is trying to sonic it but it's delicate, but when Ruby touches it, the image changes (‘do that again’) and some talk show is trying to get through (gwilliam). RUBY recognises the man. (‘how dyou know that) They can't get it to show up. The Doctors like, it doesn't make sense, it's like there’s a perception filter, like the TARDIS has. Liminal space. 66 metres. 73 yards. ('What...how dyou') You see things at 73 yards. Ruby takes the screen and steps backward, as though she's done this before. The Doctor is like woahwoah woah. Because there's barely an ounce of reality beyond the memory. They go out into the dark, walking backwards lit by the screen, holdin onto each other, the Doctor (don't blink) never losing sight of the memory TARDIS. Ruby holds the screen up over the memory of her mother, a flash of the fairy woman, then gwilliam and the Doctor remembers DNA.

Is it worth it? We can't just sit here forever. (Though technically maybe they could). At least we can find out who she was. Try and find out. At the end of the world. Mel’s exhausted (death catching up???) but is in favour. When they step out, the doctor tells them: they only have so much time until they have to return to the memory TARDIS or it will leave without them back to cracked time. And Sutek will be able to sense them. The moment Mel steps out he tries to possess her. Harrowing dust scenes. Mel leaves, the Doctor and Ruby, snow, carollers. Does the computer have a match?? We don't find out, ruby snatches the screen to her chest, because Sutek arrives. Turned Mel tries to dust Ruby but the Doctor steps in between. He suffers but doesn't die.

Sutek says, you won't stand up to my direct power. Immortal life versus eternal death. Who are you? My brother and sister ? Regen slurp scene. Ruby's like: stop please stop. Goes: don't you want to know how we managed to escape you? Lots of people escaped that way, dont you want to find them? Its on this computer and offers it up. Drops it (gasp, her DNA answer!) and leashes sutek.

The doctor then TELLS RUBY ‘bringing death to death means life!’ Triumph!!! life! Cherry and Mrs flood. Carla, Kate. The planets are back!!! Then he goes still and serious. He's going to have to be a monster. He goes to hang out in the TARDIS doorway. It SHAKES which explains holding on like that. He doesn't shout but talks loudly. ‘ life wins. Death loses. You lose. And I lose. Because there's no other choice. I'm sorry.’ cuts sutek off. He stares into the vortex as sutek dissipates.

Next scene, ruby asks whether they can go look for gwilliams dna data base again, the Doctor says huh? That never existed, gwilliam stepped down the day he was going to be handed access to the nuclear codes (‘somebody saved the world that day’). Ruby is like: huh??? ‘but…..there's another way’ the Doctor says. the doctor has to fix that bit of cracked time, placing the memory TARDIS back, and in that moment, anything might be possible. and ruby steps out a final time into the memory, which is not a hologram and not quite real. It's a chance. She can wade out between time and memory. ‘ go, go you're not here and you're here, this is our only chance to see, in between the temporal pixels, the snow resolving into image. Go and look!’ and she wades out. And the Doctor is stood next to his earlier self. And Ruby looks and makes a small sound and her mother hears it and sees the Doctor and points. (The memory changed) And the Doctor looks and she's pointing at the street sign. Ruby road. Oh. ‘She named you, Ruby. She named you after the street.’ And the Doctors both cry. The memory dissolves.

‘did you see her face?’ yeah…yeah!

And they're stood in Unit base (not the time window). And Morris : ‘description? Just kidding, that's why we had you wear a camera.’

And BAM photos. Kate reads out the story. The rest goes the same way. Except the ending.

The Doctor leaves her behind for being too busy? Nah it needs to be a little different.

‘Ruby. You've got Carla, Cherry, Claire (?), you'll be meeting your dad. Don't leave them.’

‘Will I see you again?’

‘Of course’

Ruby points out the stuff about Susan.

The Doctor says: you’ve shown me something Ruby Sunday, something I'll never forget. And…I will see Susan again too.

A decision and a sudden knowing in one. BECAUSE THAT WOULD DELIVER ON THE SUSAN BAITING. THE SUSAN THATS STILL TO COME.

#what is lost is all the stuff i loved #like.#kate speech when she was about to die #and sutek getting leashed like a bad dog #and the whole bit with the woman who was dying #well anyway im out #my stuff #vidi #rewrite #empire of death #dw #scriptdoctoring

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mermaidsirennikita · 10 months ago

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What other books do you have with the heroine not being in bed while being eating out?

Just imagine me cackling and going "yes" like a Ursula from The Little Mermaid

The Duke Gets Even by Joanna Shupe has one of my favorites because they're in a pool and he has her sit on the edge. Very funny because after she hops into the pool and is like "your turn" but he tries to be very gentlemanly and is all "please, it's fine, it'll deflate". Literal word is "deflate". (She makes him get up there anyway.)

Charlotte and The Seductive Spymaster by Grace Callaway has him bend her over the breakfast table for it. Among other things.

Second Duke's a Charm by Kate Bateman has it happen in a carriage...

As does Sarah MacLean's A Rogue By Any Other Name.

The Duchess in His Bed by Lorraine Heath has her sit on a pool table while he does it.

The Rogue of Fifth Avenue by Joanna Shupe has a similar thing--she's on a table, I don't know if it's a pool table, but it's there.

Confessions of a Dangerous Lord by Elisa Braden has him do it in the kitchen.

When a Girl Loves an Earl by Elisa Braden has him go for it on the couch with her on her hands and knees.

Lady Isabella's Scandalous Marriage by Jennifer Ashley has the whole "breakfast while we just put various spreads on each other's body parts" scene.

The Many Sins of Lord Cameron by Jennifer Ashley has it happen in a carriage I think? I mean, I think ALL OF IT happens in a carriage lol.

Her Wicked Marquess by Stacy Reid has it happen in a solarium. I think A Rake's Vow by Stephanie Laurens also has it happen in a solarium. In the "We're in a SOLARIUM, Patience, I don't know what you expect".

Scandal's Bride by Stephanie Laurens has them do everything basically everywhere. At one point he's all "prop your leg up on the nearby trough, I need to do something". He refers to her as his "snack" and if he doesn't have his "morning snack" he gets very ANNOYED. She pretends to be all outraged but inwards is like "DEUCES".

Pippa and The Prince of Secrets by Grace Callaway has it happen with like, WITNESSES. I think they do it basically everywhere tbh. Per Grace Callaway rules.

Duke of Midnight by Elizabeth Hoyt has him put her in a chair and do it VERRRRY worshipfully, in a scene I absolutely lOVE because it's like, him ceding power for a moment. Which is great with a hyperalpha like Maximus.

The Wolf and The Wildflower by Stacy Reid has Wolf Duke do this in the woods, I think.

Non-historical moments as a treat:

Contemporary:

Priest by Sierra Simone has him do it with her bent over an altar, among other things. Salt Kiss also has him do it with her in a church, bent over.

Nobody's Baby But Mine by Susan Elizabeth Phillips has it happen when they're parked in a car. Impressive, as he's a near-retirement quarterback who definitely has seen more flexible days.

Lush Money by Angelina M. Lopez has it in a car and then THE PAPARAZZI CATCH HIM IN THE MIDDLE OF IT AND HE'S BEING EXTREMELY ENTHUSIASTIC. Amazing.

Fantasy:

Bound to the Battle God by Ruby Dixon has him put her in a chair and eat a very juicy piece of fruit while he does it so that the juice is like, running down her chest and stuff while he.... also has that happening...

Paranormal:

A Hunger Like No Other by Kresley Cole has Lachlain do it mID CHASE after he catches Emma and puts her on her hands and knees in the grass. He like, slides under her to do it. It's amazing. Never forget.

Pleasure of a Dark Prince by Kresley Cole has Garreth (brother of Lachlain, the MacRieves are soooooo legit tbh) do it while Lucia is bent over a stone altar because them finally banging it out is so momentous that they of course have to do it on a stone altar... in a storm.... And the altar breaks because she's been mystically bound to chastity for centuries lmao.......

MacRieve by Kresley Cole (not those MacRieves, THE MACRIEVE, of the Clain MacRieve, the Artist Known as MacRieve) has them do it like, under a tree, in the grass, and it's the first time he's ever done it because due to intense trauma he has severe intimacy issues, and then of course it all goes to Hell shortly after BUT HEY!!! UNTIL THEN IT'S LOVELY. (And I still love it after that but lmao MacRieve and Chloe EARN that happy ending.)

Kiss of a Demon King by Kresley Cole. Rydstrom ties Sabine to a tree and does it because he needs to get EVEN. This has some of my favorite dubcon because she's all "THIS IS HORRIBLE I CAN'T BELIEVE IT" but he'll point to the ground and she'll huff and lay down.

Dark Needs at Night's Edge by Kresley Cole. Conrad goes for it in the shower and it's GREAT.

Dreams of a Dark Warrior by Kresley Cole has Declan Chase (DC!) do it (and it's a mutual situation iykwim) in the mud after Regin absolutely beats his ass. It's honestly an amazing scene.

The Fake Mate by Lana Ferguson has this happen in the woods, I believe, after he chases her down (I love a chase).

#romance novel blogging #this is by no means a complete list lol #which is why i am now trying to tag acts on GR #needed to really add some IAD ones bc they're iconic #shockingly i think lothaire and ellie only do THAT in a bed?#but then again they do spend so much of the book in his penthouse lmao #shoutout to the macrieves for always being like SO THANKFUL FOR THIS MOMENT. NEVER TAKING LIFE FOR GRANTED.

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backpackingspace · 4 months ago

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Oop Kate said unit is getting a make over

Kate really just collected everybody the doctor has ever talked to.

The doctor: this women is stalking me help

Unit: uhh yah she's giving out out free stuff with the name tardis which was suspious as he'll so we've already been stalking her

SUSAN???? AS IN THE ORGINAL SUSAN??? GRANDDAUGHT SUSAN??? ARE WE GETTING A SUSAN PLOTLINE???

"Except the obvious??? Whomst??

"Just don't go changing yours" ruby I have bad news for you

"She's actually really nice" because it's Susan? Yes ??

Not the doctor commanding unit to find ruby's mom.

This next door name is always so suspious who is she?? "I'm always hiding myself away Please" like she's.....Theyres a storm coming and then the lighting changing?? He waita no more?? Is she talking about the doctor???

...I'm choosing to believe the doctor was just lying about the kids.

"I think you bring joy stop I'm going to cry"

"Would you recognize her. Yes absolutely" doctor please as if.

Oof the doctor knowing that he will loose his shit if he hopes it's his granddaughter and then she's not.

Not the doctor ON THE FLOOR LUAGHING at there "time window"

I'm still saying the snow is weird doctors powers.

Kates face of oh shit this is how it's supposed to wrok?? Honestly the doctor just doing shit Kate spent billions on is gonna be her villian origin story.

the tardis??

I think she's crying she just gave away her child the doctor oh right.

Kates face when she's realizes the doctors absolutely going to kill her gaurd.

OOP THE DOCTS FACE is this the timeless child?? Because I think it's the timeless child. That's exactly how how I've been picturing it

oh aw poor guy

Kates face!!!

.....I don't think that's a good idea doctor

This doctor is so physical.

Is anyone else remembering the picture of an angle is an angle because

Oop she's not. He knew the second he shook her hand.

.......hey its the tradis???? Wasn't the timeless child born because of the wrapping of tardis's I'm still saying timeless child. Like I know it's not going to be but what if.

Like that the doctor was just like just stay in the room with the tradis that's definitely possessed/about to explored.

Oop we have a god again?? I'm just saying this is some master shit. The god of death even. Slightly ironic that the god of death has been hanging around the doctor who's probably the god of life.

"Did you think I was family doctor??" Holy shit

hey what has it been a whole life of this??? What the fuck what the fuck. Hey what I'm the timey whimy

Also I think tumblr ate the stuff I had already typed out so. That sucks but whatever

This episode is so weird

Hey are we including the actual master in the most dangerous prime minister in history or??

Okay so judging by martys reactions this guy is a sadist.

Oop ruby weaponized whatever this women is. Also the label is saying abilon I just realized.

40 years later???? Hello???? Has ruby spent a hundred years like this???? What is happening?? Is ruby just going to havi g this time rewound. Where is the doctor??

Hey that's not 73 yards. Also facing the wrong way???

........HEY HEY WHAT THE OLD WOMAN IS RUBY??? Awww the women saved her young self amd the doctor. I would still like more of an explanation please and thanks. Like why did speaking to old ruby make everybody hate her young self like what!!

#Doctor who #the 15th doctor #ruby sunday #Live reaction

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missdawnandherdusk · 4 years ago

Text

Ten Things I Hate About You

Muggle!Born!Reader X Draco

Summary: Request: @thelostandweeping If it is possible may I request a Draco x Muggle reader. Reader is really bad at potions so Snape has Draco tutor the reader. The reader doesn't like Draco but he finds her bluntness and her ability to be aloof interesting and tries to win her over. She later shows she's actually very kind and sweet. They become best friends and later together.

A/n: Okay this... but add a bit of Shakespeare and ABBA and you’ve got yourself a deal. This is super cute and a bit angsty and 100% pining. Let me know what you think! It’s currently 2am and I’m crying over these dorks. Love you guys so much

“Not Malfoy!” I distressed, standing. “Professor, please. I need to pass this class,”

“And you will do so, if Mr. Malfoy tutors you,” Snape hissed. “I don’t have to do this Miss Y/l/n, I could watch you fail and be quite fine with it.”

Clenching my fists, I took a deep breath and sat back down. Snape’s eyes narrowed at me.

“You and Mr. Malfoy will meet here every Friday afternoon.”

“Yes, Professor,” I sulked. “Thank you, Professor,”

“Now get out of my sight,” He snapped, and I stood, huffing out of his office and into the hall, nearly running over Malfoy.

“Watch it, mudblood,” He snapped, shoving me aside.

“Watch yourself,” I snarled, shoving him back.

He looked surprised at me, as if no one had dared to ever retaliate against him. Stupid self- righteous prat. That I needed. I made me loathe him more. I growled and stormed away, throwing my stuff onto the table in the Great Hall, sitting beside my friends.

“Well, that’s not a pretty face,” Ernie gave me a teasing look. “Snape that bad, huh?”

“He’s making Malfoy tutor me!” I lamented. “I think I’d rather fail,”

Shocked gasps rose around my small group of friends.

“Look here he comes,” Susan nodded to the door and sure enough, the blond prick was storming his way over here with murder in his eyes.

“You!” He sneered, stalking up to my table.

“What about me?” I gave him a cold look.

“You’re a filthy little mudblood who just ruined my Friday afternoons!” He shouted.

“And you’re a heinous misogynistic asshole who I have to deal with every Friday afternoon instead of going to Quidditch practice so forgive me if I’m not weeping at your feet begging for forgiveness,” I snapped, standing, my arms folded.

Onlookers of our conversation let out a low gasp of surprise as Malfoy stammered for the next thing to say. I raised an eyebrow at him, waiting.

“Cat got your tongue?” A smirk spread across my face. He drew his wand, pointing it at me. I didn’t flinch.

“Mr. Malfoy!” I heard the familiar voice of McGonagall. “Wand away! Unless you wish to serve detention,”

My smirk grew to a grin as I watched Malfoy stomp his foot and storm out of the room, shoving a few first years out of the way. A few clapped and cheered at the encounter before getting scolded by McGonagall.

I dreaded Friday. More than I dreaded anything. I’d rather never listen to music again if it meant I didn’t have to listen to Malfoy teach me about Potions. Okay, well, maybe the situation wasn’t that dire... but I was considering it.

“You’re early,”

I hadn’t even closed the door and he was already snapping at me.

“Hello Malfoy,” I gritted, turning to see him already standing over a cauldron, ingredients laid out around the table.

“Let’s just get this over with?” He nodded me over, his eyes still trained on the knife and leathery skin in his hands.

I shed my robe and rolled up my sleeves, going to hover beside him.

“Can you tell me what this is?” His voice lost some of the snap to it as he slid the crushed hide into the bubbling brew.

“If I could do you think I’d be here?” I huffed, grabbing my textbook and notes, flipping through the pages.

“Oh, for the love of Merlin,” Draco snatched the book from my hands.

“Give it back!” I shouted, reaching for the textbook.

“You won’t get better if you’re cheating,” He disappeared the book with a wave of his hand.

“That was my book! Malfoy, I swear to god!”

We were toe to toe, inches from each other. There was a calm, careful, infuriating smile on his face and anger on mine.

“Now, tell me, little mudblood,” He took a careful step back. “What potion is this?”

I narrowed my eyes at him and with a deep breath I looked over at the grey sludge that boiled in the pot. My eyes took inventory of the ingredients that were laid around the desk.

“Knotgrass?” I guessed, picking up a jar inspecting it.

Draco gave a seldom nod. We went on like that, until I had named all of the ingredients that were before us.

“I know this!” I groaned, rubbing my face. “I should know this!”

“Well, why don’t you?” Malfoy smirked. “It’s quite simple,”

“If it was simple,” I gritted out. “I wouldn’t be here,”

My book was suddenly back in his hands.

“It’s easier to find a potion by looking at the index. You know the ingredients, find them and cross reference,” He handed it back to me.

“That’s... actually really smart,”

I took the book and flipped to the back. It took some time, but I eventually flipped to the page I felt was right: Polyjuice Potion.

“Well done,” He didn’t smile, but he wasn’t quite scowling. “Perhaps there is hope for you yet, little mudblood.”

“Watch it,” I growled. “I’m still not above punching you,”

“What would you like me to call you then? Little shrew? Spitfire? Gorgon?” His smirk was back.

“Oh, kiss a dementor, Malfoy,” Grabbing my things, I ditched him and the Polyjuice Potion, heading outside into the setting sun to clear my head with some fresh air.

______________________________

Draco sat back, leaning against the table, watching you storm out. Your adamant hatred for him was quite amusing. The fact that you needed him to pass Potions and your loathing of him, made him laugh to himself as he began to clean up with a quick flick of his wand.

“I am to glad to see that my office is still intact,” Snape mused, flowing into the room. “I can’t say I had high hopes for you two,”

“It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be,” Draco admitted. “She’s... bearable.”

“Is that sentiment I hear Mr. Malfoy?” Snape raised an eyebrow.

“Not at all,” Draco scoffed. “A challenge.”

“You’re absolutely daft!” Pansy dismayed later that night in the common room. “You really think you can tame that shrew?”

“Do you doubt me?” Draco raised an eyebrow. “Besides, I wrangled you in, and I put up with Crabbe and Goyle, and you have not been to a family dinner of mine. Y/n? She’s a piece of cake.”

“Ten galleons says you’re wrong,” Pansy held out her hand.

“You’re on,” Draco grinned as he shook it.

The next Friday, you just as riled and furious as you had been last Friday, and it was almost enough to make Draco laugh. Every other girl seem to... how did you put it? Weep at his feet begging for forgiveness? That seemed about right. But you? Oh, he was right, you were a little spitfire. Especially when you were frustrated because you couldn’t figure out how to brew Sleeping Draught. He left that tutoring session smiling to himself, watching your livid form head down the hall.

The next day Draco wandered down to the Quidditch Pitch, surprised to see you out there alone, running drills. You had mentioned giving up practice to let him tutor you. Thinking back to his bet with Pansy, he shed his robe and grabbed his broom from the closet, changing quickly, and headed out into the air after you.

“Bloody hell!” You screamed, nearly falling off your broom. “What the fuck is wrong with you Malfoy!?” You hovered feet from him, covered in sweat and dirt.

“Well, at the moment, the chance of losing a bet,” He grinned.

“Shouldn’t have taken it then, asshole,” You rolled your eyes, balancing on your broom as you stretched out your arms. “But I meant why are you here? Are you following me now?”

“Not particularly, I leave my stalking abilities for Potter. Nothing to waste on a mudblood.” Oh, he loved watching the fire grow in your eyes as he called you that.

“Piss off, Malfoy.” You snapped, flying away from him, taking a lap around the pitch.

He followed. You sped up. So did he. When you pulled straight up, it was all too easy to follow. He could hear your aggravated growl as he chased you around the pitch. You stopped short and he nearly ran into you, having to swerve out of the way. Your face was a mask of calm and disgust as you shook your head and landed, heading for the locker rooms.

“How’s the shrew?” Pansy asked later that week. “Still think you can tame her?”

“Patience Pans,” Draco chuckled. “These things take time,”

It wasn’t hard to figure out your schedule that week. It was even easier to make sure that he was there just long enough for you to notice him and then watch your mood sour as you stalked out of whatever room the two of you shared.

“Hey there, Spitfire,” Draco grinned leaning against your table at the library.

“What?” You snapped, not looking up at him. “Oh, I’m sorry I forgot, in this society, being male and an asshole makes you worthy of my time.” You shot him a deathly glare. “Bugger off, Malfoy,”

“You hate me, don’t you?” He smirked. “I get under that muggle skin of yours,”

“I really don’t think you warrant that strong an emotion,” I leaned back in my chair.

“Maybe another strong emotion then? Because they say if a girl constantly rips of a guy it means she likes him.”

“Am I that transparent?” Your face fell flat with you tone. “I want you. I need you. Oh baby, oh baby.” Rolling your eyes, you went back to your book. “Go find some other girl to fuck, Malfoy,”

“Ooh, see but that, there. Who needs affection when I have blind hatred?” He grinned and sat beside you, taking your book.

“Malfoy!” You hollered, only to be scolded by Pince. “Give me my book.”

“Now where have I heard that before.” Draco flipped through the pages of your book. “Ugh, a muggle book, I should have known,”

You snatched it from his hands and cradled it to your chest.

“You wouldn’t know a good book if I hit you in the face with it,” You snarled, grabbing your bag and storming off.

The few students who were watching the encounter quickly turned back to their work as Draco glanced around the shelves of books, noticing the missing space your book left in the shelf and the plethora of similar books.

“Shakespeare?” Draco mused, drawing a book into his hands.

________________________________

“He’s obsessed! He won’t leave me alone!” I cried in frustration. “I wish he’d go back to stalking Potter because I’m sick of it!”

“Have you ever considered that maybe he likes you?” Hannah asked.

“Likes me?” I snorted. “Ah, yes. Because calling me a mudblood, or a shrew is just a tell of flirting,”

“He called you a mudblood?” Ernie demanded.

“Calm down, I can handle myself.” Rolling my eyes, I sulked, standing. “I’m going to the pitch, anyone wanna join?”

There was a resounding chorus of ‘no’s. Which was probably a good thing. I needed some time alone to think and blow off steam. After a few hours of running drills I headed back to the locker rooms. Wiping my face with a towel, I jumped nearly a foot when I saw that I wasn’t alone.

“For the love of god, Draco!” I shouted. “What are you doing?”

“Well, hello to you too,” He smirked. “And I do believe I have quidditch practice,”

I pursed my lips and slammed my locker shut. His irritating casual conversation still had the ability to make my blood boil.

“I hope you fall to your death,” I snapped, heading towards the girl’s showers.

“Well, there’s a way to get a bloke’s attention,” He smirked, leaning effortlessly against his locker.

“My mission in life,” I smiled cheerfully. “And I’ve obviously struck your fancy, so the world makes sense again,” I sighed wistfully and deadpanned.

“See you Friday,” He smiled politely.

I let out a sound of disgust and shoved down the urge to go back in there and punch him in his perfect face. The days until Friday seemed to fly by, mocking me with their abruptness.

Taking a deep breath, I walked into Snape’s office, where Draco was waiting for me, the same lazy smile on his face. I didn’t say a word as I shed my coat and rolled up my sleeves, taking out my book and notes.

“What in the bloody hell is that?” Draco stammered, almost knocking over a vial of Wormwood—I think.

“What?” I looked around then behind me. “What are you playing at?”

“Around your neck!” He gestured, annoyed.

“Headphones?” I chuckled, easily sliding them off. “You know... music? Your lot do have that sort of thing, don’t they?”

“I don’t see what... headphones—” As if the word was foreign to his tongue, “—have to do with music,” Draco scoffed.

“You can listen to music anywhere?” I slid them off from around my neck and pulled up my portable CD player from my bag. “Have you really never seen a CD player or headphones?” I was baffled. “I don’t know what I’d do without music,”

“CD?” Draco frowned at the player in my hands.

“Yeah, Mom just send me ABBA’s Gold album and I’m a bit obsessed,” A slight pink touched my cheeks. “I’ve been wanting it so long,”

“ABBA?”

I laughed and shook my head, shoving both my headphones and CD player into my bag. “Maybe I’ll show you one day,”

It took less time than expected for me to figure out that he had a cauldron of Veritaserum in front of me. And maybe I genuinely smiled at Draco and fought the urge to hug him because, Potions really was making sense to me now. I would never understand how he managed it, but he could teach it in a way that I understood.

“Hey Draco?” I paused at the door on my way out. He looked up from cleaning, his careful blue eyes meeting mine. “Thanks,”

I hated that I wasn’t annoyed at him when he found me in the library again.

“So, is this for Muggle Studies then?” Draco nodded to my book, sitting the incorrect way in the chair next to mine, resting his arms against the back, almost nonchalant.

“No,” I rolled my eyes, slipping off my headphones, pausing the CD. “On contrary to popular belief, we muggles aren’t uncivilized. I do enjoy things like reading and art and music,” The annoyance in my voice was false.

“I’m aware,” Draco grinned that lazy smile again.

“Oh, so you think you know me then? Have enough from stalking me these past weeks?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Not like we’ve spent the last few Fridays together...” He drawled. “And I think I’m getting there.”

“The only thing you know about me is that I’m muggle and suck at potions,” I muttered, turning back to my book.

“You’re interesting,” Draco shrugged, causing me to backtrack and frown.

“Is that all I am to you? Something to ogle at? Maybe get a laugh in here and there with your pureblood buddies?” My voice went back to being venomous. “Just because you're pureblood, doesn't mean you can treat people like they don't matter!” I grabbed my belongings and stormed out of the library, fighting tears.

________________________________

Draco hated that you were right. And he hated that he almost made you cry as well. He hated that you could see right through him. And he hated that he felt any of this at all.

“The bet’s off,” Draco hissed to Pansy.

“You know what that means...” She grinned mischievously. “That means you have to do my homework for a week, and you pay up.”

Draco forked over the coins, not missing them in the slightest.

“She too much for you then? Not able to tame our little mudblood shrew?” A wicked grin curled on her face.

“Don’t call her that,” Draco snapped. “You don’t know a thing about her,”

“She’s a mudblood, Draco,” Pansy sat up, looking concerned. “Don’t tell me you actually have feelings for her?”

Draco didn’t have an answer for that.

He didn’t have an answer for any of this. As he laid in bed that night, staring up at the satin green that draped over his bed, all he could think about was the hurt on your face and in your words. It was different from your remarks before, those he could brush off easily. But not the tears in your eyes or the betrayal in your voice. Pansy was right, he shouldn’t care at all. You were beneath him. A mudblood, muggle born, shrew.

But he fucked up.

Because now you were so much more precious than that and he let you do it to him. He gave you the place in his heart where you resided.

That Friday he almost didn’t expect you to show. When you did, after the initial shock, there was an apology rushing to his lips, but held back by his pride. You barely looked at him that day. Your movements were muted, gentle. You murmured soft answers.

“Why are you doing this?” It was the first thing you said to him that wasn’t some ingredient.

“Tutoring you?” He raised an eyebrow.

You shook your head and took a deep breath. “All of it—what's in it for you?” Your eyes met his and he felt like you were reading him like one of your books. “What’s your game, Malfoy?” It hurt more than he thought as you switched back to the use of his surname.

“So, I have to have a motive to be with you?” He snapped back defensive.

“You tell me.” The tone of your words had him weak at the knees, gripping at the table for support.

“Can’t I just enjoy your company?” Draco snapped, slamming the book closed. “We’re done for the day,” He shook his head, looking down at the table beneath his hands.

You left without another word, but a glance back to him that had him reeling. He wanted to call out after you, but the words were trapped by fear and uncertainty.

Draco still watched you in the halls and in class whenever he could steal a glance. You seemed to always have your headphones in and your head down, nose in a book. Snape informed him about mid-week that your grades were adequate and that the tutoring would end promptly. He should have been happy about that. And a month ago he would have been more than glad to be rid of you... but he made a huge mistake.

He fell for you instead.

And you hated him. For everything he was and is. He couldn’t find it in himself to be angry that you closed yourself off from him. He didn’t blame you. Things were as it should be, and the world could spin around and not threaten to implode.

It was absolutely ludicrous. He shouldn’t care. He shouldn’t be doing this.

Every night, he slipped on headphones, and fell asleep to ABBA singing about love and loss behind the safety of his closed bed curtains. Sometimes he could almost hear your gentle voice whisper the lyrics, broken and defeated. Maybe he whispered a few back to the memory of you. Maybe a tear or two slipped out.

Maybe he sent you a note in class. Maybe it said that he was sorry and understood why you hated him. Maybe he deserved to watch you crumple it up and shove it into your bag and not give him a second glance.

Maybe enough was enough.

Determined, one crisp spring morning, Draco rose. After tucking away his guilty pleasure, he didn’t bother with house colors as he pulled a jumper over his dark wash jeans, scouring the castle grounds for you. It shouldn’t have been that hard, he had your scheduled memorized for Merlin’s sake, but still you evaded him.

To be fair, you didn’t evade him at all, he just wasn’t paying attention to your curled-up form in the Quidditch stands.

He called your name and gritted his teeth when you didn’t look up. He tried again.

“Go away,” You pulled your arms tighter around yourself.

He didn’t. Instead he sat down beside you, not saying a word. You two sat in silence that about killed him when you spoke up again.

“Did you win... your little bet?” Your voice was broken. “Did you tame the shrew?”

“You knew?” Draco gaped.

A soft shrug fell from your shoulder. “I know what people say about me...” A sigh escaped your lips. “And Pansy’s always one to hold anything she can over me. She’s my cousin, you know... my mom was a squib...”

A frown fell on Draco’s face at the new information. How had he not known that? Pansy was always near him and well, he did stalk you for about a month. Maybe you had been right, and you were nothing more than a spectacle to him until that last week...

Your careful eyes were trained on the empty pitch before him. No emotion was evident on your face... maybe an air of melancholy.

“I... I’m sorry,” Draco glanced down. “You were right about me... about everything.”

“I really don’t want to talk about...” You sighed. “Things we’ve gone through...”

A smile tugged at Draco’s lips. He knew those words. And it was so like you to quote them at him. He wondered how many other times you had gotten away with quoting song lyrics at him.

______________________________

I could feel Draco’s eyes study my face and the small smile that rested on his. I glanced over at him an eyebrow raised in question.

“You can’t just quote song lyrics at me,” He toyed, the familiar irritating smirk on his lips.

“I can do whatever I please,” I snapped, my cheeks flushing that I had been caught. Then it dawned on me. “Wait—”

A laugh escaped his lips. A wonderful sound that I had never heard before. One that I wanted to hear again.

“I was curious...” He shrugged, nonchalant seeming.

“You... listened to ABBA? A muggle CD? And you... know the words?” I gawked at him. “Who the hell are you and what have you done with Draco Malfoy?” I couldn’t help the smile on my lips.

“I’ve been asking myself that for about a week now,” He grinned, then looked down, his smile dropping.

“Draco?” I asked softly, reaching out for his hand. His blue eyes met mine, hesitant. “It’s... you don’t have to... I know you can’t...” Fumbling over my words, I couldn’t find the ones that seemed to fit right.

He reached out, the hand I had seen for weeks on end delicately handle ingredients and potions, just as precisely reached out and tilted my chin up.

“Tell me,” He whispered. “Have I messed up so badly that you can’t forgive me? That you won’t take a chance on a... how did you put it? Heinous misogynistic asshole?” There was a teasing smile on his lips that somehow moved to be inches from mine.

“Who’s quoting song lyrics now?” I mused softly, “And what kind of idiotic question is that?”

“That’s all I needed to hear,”

His mouth was on mine then, and I couldn't fight him. Not because he was possibly stronger than me—but not by much—but because my will crumbled into dust the second our lips met. So, I kissed him back. His hands memorized my face, the same way mine were tracing his, and, in the brief seconds when his lips were free, he whispered my name.

“I promise I’ll make it up to you,” He breathed out. “I’ll do better,”

"Don't promise me anything," I whispered softly, my hands falling to his shoulders. “Next week you might change your mind... or Pansy might—”

His lips were on mine again, silencing my words and doubts.

“Will you please try to hear what I'm telling you? Will you let me attempt to explain what you mean to me?” His stark eyes pierced mine as he cradled my face. “I am so sorry. I know I’m an asshole, and I know I’ve fucked up—” I started to protest but his thumb brushed over my lips, keeping them closed “—I have. And for a while I thought it was because I fell for you, but I see now is that it was because I didn’t fall for you sooner,”

“Sap,” I mumbled against his thumb, fighting the urge to roll my eyes.

His hands fell and I drew him into a hug. He held me close and for a moment, I just let him hold me. No fears, no doubts, no malicious thoughts, no blood status, no magic. Just two teens and something that might be love.

.................................

“Pansy is actually going to kill me,” I whispered, hesitating outside the Great Hall doors.

“Not while I have a say in the matter,” Draco pressed a soft kiss to the top of my head. “And besides... what’s the worst thing that could happen?”

I walked into the Great Hall, hand in hand with Draco. There was the clatter of dropped dishes and silverware and a collective gasp that fell into a hushed silence. Hundreds of eyes were on us.

“Well, that could have gone worse...” Draco muttered under his breath and I snorted a laugh, shaking my head, letting him pull me to a nearby table.

Nervous chattered and hushed whispers filled the hall. I guess they had good reason though. Draco and I had both tamed the other shrew.

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ajnerdess · 4 years ago

Text

The end of an era (Javier x reader angst)

So, as previously mentioned, I had this idea for a full fanfiction about the reader who is in a relationship with Javier who gets closer to Charles while he’s in Guarma and then the reader feels torn between the two and so I thought I would post bits and pieces of it (seeing as I don’t have time for another fully fleshed out fanfic) so here’s a chapter about how the reader is once Javier returns and they are in Beaver Hallow and she feels a distance between her and Javier as he grows more erratic and mean towards half the camp. Lots of angst and a lil fluff ahead….

You watched as Micah conversed with your lover Javier, not bothering to hold back a frown as you thought of Micah digging his claws into your love. Javier was a good man, a great man. He was kind, and brave and always stood for the right thing, that was, until recently. He followed Dutch blindly and grew more angry and confrontational towards Arthur, John and Charles in particular, going as far as to accuse John of betrayal when speaking to Bill and Micah. He grew short with you when you tried to make him see sense, that perhaps Dutch was no longer behaving in the interest of the gang and was losing his way, but Javier refused to see it, refusing to believe the man who saved his life and took him in could be capable of turning on his family.

You approached Javier and Micah, smoothing your hands over your legs nervously.

“Javier, could I have a word with you please? In private?”

Javier glanced up at you. “Later amor, later” he said.

You breathed out as you looked down at the ground. “Please?”

Micah growled, stabbing the table with his knife. “He’s busy sweetheart, he’ll deal with you later.”

You paused, waiting for Javier to defend you. The Javier you knew would have jumped to defend you, hell, he had punched Micah for insulting him a few months ago. You shot Javier a pleading look but he refused to meet your eyes and you stormed off, going to check on Karen as you left him to talk with Micah.

The gang was falling apart. Doubt and divide filled the camp, Molly was dead, shot by Susan. Hosea, Lenny, Sean, they were all gone, and when Javier and the others returned from Guarma, they had brought a sadness with them that had failed to leave the camp since. It didn’t help that Beaver Hallow was a horrible place, surrounded by angry Murphree Brood gang members looking for revenge since Arthur and Charles had cleared their people out of the camp.

You had tried to help Karen over her addiction to alcohol, but since losing Sean, she was a lost cause.

One of your few remaining friends, Charles had taken to helping Rains Fall and his tribe out and you had been helping him, until Javier had returned. Things had been strained between you both as a result, perhaps because Charles had always harboured feelings for you, and Javier’s return had meant you had stuck by your lover instead of going to Charles.

Everything was wrong. Everything was broken and after checking on Karen, you went to the edge of the camp, allowing yourself a moment to cry.

“Hey Y/N, everything ok?”

You wiped your tears before turning to see Arthur. He was thin, his eyes bloodshot and he had not been able to shift a nasty cough he had for weeks now. He was sick, with what you didn’t know, but seeing your friend in such a condition was hard to watch.

“Oh, Arthur, hello, yes I’m fine thank you, are you alright?”

Arthur stood next to you and stared down at you. You hated when people asked you how you were when you felt this way, it seemed to drive you to tears more, and you didn’t do much of anything but cry lately.

Arthur sighed as he looked out to the mountains. “I’m alive, for now at least, that seems to be about as well as the rest of us are doin’ at the minute, listen is Javier treatin’ you right? I notice he’s been acting up in camp, you don’t have to tell me anythin’ darlin’ I just want to know you’re safe.”

You nudged him affectionately, before looking at the ground, feeling tears sting your eyes.

“He’s just, I just wish he could see Dutch’s faults, and Micah, always talking in his ear, he’s poisoning him Arthur, I know he is. But he just thinks I’m nagging him, trying to isolate him from his friends, he can’t see I’m just worried because I care. I don’t know what to do Arthur, I don’t know if even loves me anymore Arthur, I seem to annoy him all the time.”

You felt Arthur’s hand on your shoulder. “I know darlin’, half the damn camp are actin’ like fools and they can’t see the woods through the trees nowadays, Javier ain’t like the others though, he ain’t stupid like Bill, or mean for mean’s sake like Micah, he’ll see sense. He loves you, I know that, always has, that love ain’t goin’ anywhere darlin’ you just, stay strong.”

You hugged Arthur softly, but as you did, he was seized by a coughing fit, you patted his back and waited for it to ease, the force of it practically taking his breath away.

“Oh Arthur, I have a recipe for a tonic that might ease that coughing a little, will you let me make you some, please? It’s the least I could do.”

He shook his head. “I’m fine darlin’ please, don’t trouble yourself.”

You took his hand in your own. “Please Arthur, please let me help, you’re my friend, let me help you.”

He paused before nodding. “Ok, ok fine, just don’t trouble yourself too hard for it.”

You nodded before going towards your tent. As you approached, you saw Javier talking to Charles as he tried to mend the carriage.

“What’s your problem brother?”

Charles looked up at Javier from where he was kneeling. “No problem.”

“No you got a problem, look at how you’re acting” Javier retorted.

You walked closer, watching Javier and Charles argue was painful to watch.

“I don’t have a problem, do you have a problem?” Charles asked.

“I don’t know yet” Javier threatened.

You stood between them. “Javier stop, just leave him alone, please, please, look at me, leave it, please” you begged him.

“Use your brain friend, use your brain” Javier said, ignoring you.

“I’ll use my brain, and you use yours” Charles replied, calm as always.

“Oh, you wanna die?” Javier threatened, causing you to reach out and touch his chest. “Javier! Stop, please, will you stop this?”

Javier continued to ignore you. “You’re making a dumb choice man” he told Charles.

“I made no choices” Charles answered, standing up as he faced Javier.

Javier reached around you and spat at Charles’ feet before storming off.

You stood there in disbelief, you had never seen Javier behave so cruelly to those he called friends before. Charles wiped his shoe on the ground as he shook his head.

“Are you alright?” you asked him.

“Fine” he answered.

You looked at him for a moment. “I’m, I’m so sorry Charles, I’m sorry” you said and finally your tears fell as you gripped the side of the carriage, feeling the onset of emotion hit you.

Charles instinctively reached out to you, touching your arm softly. “It’s alright Y/N, it’s not your fault he’s like this.”

You frowned as your tears fell. “I don’t know what’s happening Charles, this isn’t like him, he isn’t cruel. He isn’t a bad man, but whatever happened in Guarma has changed him. I can’t even talk to him anymore, he won’t listen to me, he thinks I’m trying to cause problems, he doesn’t even see me half the time. He’s slipping away and I can’t, I don’t know how to fix this.”

You wanted nothing more than to throw your arms around Charles but Javier had already threatened him, if he saw you hugging him, god knows what he would do to the poor man you cared for so deeply.

Charles gave you a look of sympathy, he wasn’t sure what to say in truth. Javier had changed. His behaviour was inexcusable and Charles wasn’t sure how best to comfort you.

“It will be alright Y/N, things will work out, he’ll see sense, he’s just, confused.”

You nodded, touching his hand on your shoulder gently. “Charles, you are too kind to me, I don’t deserve you. I’m sorry for Javier’s behaviour, if he, if he threatens you again, will you please let me know?”

Charles smirked. “I think I can handle myself against him Y/N, but if he keeps making you cry, not sure I’ll be able to hold myself back from giving him a piece of my mind.”

You sighed, not wanting your friends and lover to fight anymore. You decided to try and speak to Javier.

He was whittling down by the river alone and he barely looked up at you when you sat by his side.

“Javier, what did Charles do to warrant such threats?”

He pressed his knife against the wood harder. “Always sneaking off against Dutch’s orders, working with others, been with us less than a year and he’s already disloyal.”

“He started helping Rains fall when you and the others were gone, he doesn’t mean any harm, he’s a good man, like you, you know that.”

Javier huffed. “He should be staying with us and only us, instead of sneaking off to others.”

“He didn’t deserve your anger Javier” you said quietly.

He stood up and went to leave. “Fine, take his side, go against me.”

You stood up and grabbed his arm, holding him back. “No wait, please Javi, don’t go, don’t shut me out, I love you, I want to understand you, please don’t shut me out again.”

He paused, staying put. He looked up at you. “You have to trust me querida, you have to trust Dutch, if we trust him, he’ll get us out of this mess and we can escape this life and be together, get married, have babies, just like you wanted.”

You moved to hold his hands softly. He made everything sound so good, so achievable even now.

“Javier, I know you love Dutch, I know you trust him and I know you think you owe him for saving your life, but, lately, Dutch’s choices have been more and more erratic, whatever happened in Guarma, it wasn’t good, for any of you I can see that. But I think it might have changed Dutch for the worst. I don’t think he’s the man you think he is, I don’t think he’s the same man who saved you.”

Javier snatched his hands back from yours. “You don’t know him like I know him. I trust him, I listen to him, he’s always gotten us out of trouble.”

“And what of Davey? Jenny? Mac, Sean, Lenny, even Hosea Javier, Dutch’s plans led to their deaths.”

Javier frowned. “You’re blaming him for their deaths? It’s the life we live y/n, it’s tough, people die. It isn’t Dutch’s fault.”

“His plans are getting more and more rushed, nonsensical, please Javi, you must see that.”

“I trust him” Javier repeated.

“And what of me? Don’t you trust me anymore? Do my words mean nothing anymore? Don’t you love me anymore?”

Javier faltered, his hands going to your face. “Of course I love you mi amor, of course I trust you. That’s why I’m doing all of this, that’s why I’m keeping to the plan, because I love you, because I want you safe, can’t you see that? Everything I do is because I love you, it’s all for you.”

“I wish you could see Javi, I wish you could see the truth, you have to believe me when I say, when the chips are down, Dutch will save himself, and only himself. We need to start thinking about our own lives” you said quietly.

Javier pulled away again, frowning at you. “Are you trying to get me to choose between you and Dutch?”

“I hope it doesn’t come to that, truly I don’t. But I wish you could see that I want you to be safe, Dutch wants you to help him for his own gain, why would I say any of this unless I loved you? Do you think I enjoy this? Do you think I want you to choose? I just want you to see sense Javi, please.”

Javier threw his hands up. “Unbelievable. Arthur and Charles are poisoning you against me, I have to go, Dutch wants me for something. I’ll make sure I don’t tell anyone about this conversation, I suggest you do the same, Susan’s pretty trigger happy when it comes to traitors.”

You flinched at that, it felt like a threat. Your lover, your Javier, calling you a traitor for wanting him to be safe.

That night you went to sleep alone in the tent you shared with Javier. It felt cold without your lover by your side, and you held the blankets closer to you as you tried to reclaim some warmth.

Hours later, when you were half asleep, you felt arms reluctantly close around you. You felt Javier hold you close, breathing in your scent.

“I hate fighting with you mi amor. I love you so much, I wish you could see that, there was a time when you believed that querida” he whispered.

You turned, resting your hands on his around your waist. “I do believe you love me Javi, as I love you. I love you so much.”

He leaned forward, kissing you gently. “You’ll see hermosa, I’m going to get us out of this life. I’m gonna marry you and give you the life you deserve.”

You cuddled in closer to him. “Just survive long enough for that to happen my love.”

With that you fell asleep together in each other’s arms.

You woke in the middle of the night to a strange feeling something was wrong. Javier was still asleep next to you so you ventured outside your tent. You walked to the edge of the camp where Charles was tending to Taima. As you approached, you saw he was loading his things onto her. He turned to face you, giving you a sad look as your eyes widened.

“Charles, are you leaving?”

He nodded slowly. “I can’t stay here anymore y/n, the gang is, well, all but gone. I have a chance to move on with Rains Fall’s people, a chance at peace.”

You nodded slightly, understanding why he would leave. “You were going to go without saying goodbye?”

Charles blinked as he looked down. “I thought, I thought it might be easier, I didn’t want to make things harder than they needed to be by saying goodbye.”

“So you thought leaving without saying goodbye would make things easier?”

He met your stare. “I’m sorry hummingbird.”

You stepped forward. “Charles, I’ll, I’m sorry, sorry for everything, sorry for all of this” you told him.

“It’s not your fault. None of it is. You were, you were the best part of this gang, you made me stick around with people longer than I have before, I don’t want to leave, but it’s too dangerous.”

You nodded before throwing your arms around him, his warmth enveloping you as he held you back.

“I’ll miss you Charles, so much.”

He held you close, you felt his lips against your neck as he held you and finally, he stepped back.

“Y/N, come with me, I know you love Javier, but I could keep you safe. I love you, I think you know that, that you’ve always known that. Come with me and we can escape together, live a life of peace” he asked you, holding you at arms length.

You considered it, a part of you loved Charles too, if Javier hadn’t returned from Guarma, you saw a life between you and Charles but Javier was here, and you had loved him for so long, and he loved you, despite it all. Could you really leave him for Charles?

You touched his chest, he was so broad and warm, even the touch of him made you feel safe.

“I’m sorry Charles, I can’t leave Javier. If he, if anything happened to him, I could never forgive myself, I’m so sorry, if things were different, I would run away with you in a second, I would start a life with you. You are a good man Charles, the best and I wish I could, I wish I could be there for you, but I love Javier, and I have to stay loyal to him, I’m so sorry.”

Charles nodded solemnly. “I understand hummingbird. I understand. Please stay safe. I wish you every happiness, I hope you find everything you want in this life, you are a great woman, you deserve to be happy.”

He kissed your forehead before he mounted Taima. You touched his leg affectionately before stroking Taima’s nose softly.

“Goodbye girl, I’ll miss you terribly too, such a good girl” you told Taima who nudged at you.

“Charles, be safe, I wish you every happiness too, if I don’t see you in this life again, I’ll look for you in the next. Goodbye” you told him.

He nodded once before finally leaving. You watched him go, until he was nothing but a spec in the distance.

Javier was all you had now.

Wow, that was way more depressing than i initially intended! These RDR2 feels are bloody heartbreaking! I have a plan to do a second part of this (which won’t be as depressing...... i hope) sorry for hurting anyone, i feel like nobody needs angst writing at the minute, but i couldn’t help it, my fingers just kept typing, i couldn’t control it!

#rdr2 #charles smith #red dead redemption 2 #javier escuella #my writing #fanfiction #angst #mywriting #fanfic #rdr

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dastardlydandelion · 3 years ago

Text

medium luci

ao3 link

content warnings: homophobia, comphet, child abuse, abusive relationships

It’s rare that Susan and Neil have the same weekday off. Neil typically works five days a week and she three or four, depending who’s on staff, being that she’s only part-time. But he’d had a dentist appointment midmorning so he’d taken today off and decided to make his hours up by volunteering for a double next week.

Susan doesn’t typically care to spend any extra time alone with her husband. They have so little to talk about these days, now that he doesn’t try to butter her up or feed her honey sweet lies as much as he used to. Now that Neil doesn’t care to talk much at all unless ranting or complaining about the various things he doesn’t like, his son’s style of dress, women who sit with their legs open, cab drivers who don’t speak English. Susan doesn’t even remember the last time Neil had to take a cab but he has strong opinions on them nonetheless, and the list goes on and on.

He thankfully hasn’t done much of that today, however. He’d parked himself in front of the television after coming home from his appointment and simply nodded when Susan announced she was going out to garden. She only comes inside when she hears the phone ring and by the time she’s walking up the back steps, Neil’s already answered it.

She watches his expression change as he converses with whomever’s on the other end, nervousness fluttering in her chest as his eyes widen, then harden.

“I’ll be right there,” Neil concludes as he hangs up, turning those hard eyes onto Susan. “That was the school.”

“Oh dear…what’s Billy done this time?”

“Not Billy.” Neil shakes his head and Susan’s heart drops with the realization her husband isn’t just irritated but seething, knuckles blanched as his hands ball into tight fists. “Maxine. Did you know the Sinclairs have a girl around her age?”

“N-No, I didn’t. I’m not very familiar with them, Neil.” Susan never had much luck getting close to anyone anymore, not in the least because of Neil himself.

“Apparently Maxine is,” he declares icily. “A teacher caught her and the Sinclair girl fornicating under the bleachers.”

Susan’s heart turns to stone and sinks into her stomach.

No.

Please, no.

Neil has very strong opinions about sexuality in general and homosexual conduct in particular, and Susan can practically feel the outrage radiating from him. It crackles in the air like the promise of a lightning storm. Neil’s fists are still clenched and his posture goes taut like it always does before he explodes.

“W-Well,” Susan begins, swallowing past the lump in her throat.

She hates herself for what she is going to say. She says it anyway.

“Well, you know where she learned that kind of b-behavior from, don’t you?”

Because if Neil is going to explode, Susan can’t stop him. But she hopes she can at least encourage the worst of it away from Max. She watches Neil’s eyes flicker and knows they’re both remembering the day they came home early from the short vacation they’d taken for their fifth anniversary, a girl and a boy sneaking out of Billy’s bedroom window, neither particularly clothed. She watches the angry bulge of the vein pulsing in his neck and knows they’re both thinking of that short young fellow with the skateboard who worked at the used car lot during the day and spent his time with Billy during the night.

“Yes, I know exactly where she learned it from. I’m picking both of them up and we’re all going to have a family discussion.”

“I should come with you.”

“No.” Neil holds up his hand. “Stay here, Susan. We’ll be back soon enough.”

Neil has gun powder in his gaze and she dares not argue. She lowers her head and steps aside when he walks past to fetch the truck keys from the hook. He stomps down the steps and slams the backdoor shut behind him.

Susan watches through the window as he gets into the truck and pulls out of the driveway, feeling dreadfully ill. She doesn’t mean what she’d said, of course. There are a number of behaviors that Max has picked up from Billy, but that isn’t one of them. If anyone is to blame, Susan supposes it’s herself for passing it along intrinsically.

She has her own secret desires locked away within the chambers of her heart. Desire she dares not confront for her own sanity, for her own safety. She’s never acted on her wants, always chose to play private games of hide and seek with them in her head instead, those insidiously innocent wishes of hers. Never spoken aloud let alone pursued those urges that flush hot beneath her skin when she finds her eyes drawn to other women’s lips, hips, breasts.

Susan gave it to Max and unlike her, Max is brash and bold and brave. God save her, Max does what she wants to do and doesn’t care what other people think. Susan would admire her for it if it didn’t scare her to death.

Because Neil does care what other people think. He cares very much. And Susan’s seen him annoyed with Max in the past. She’s seen him frustrated with Max, displeased, exasperated. But never has she seen the silent stirring of a reign of rage to come where Max is concerned, never has she known that particular look in Neil’s eye to be directed Max’s way. She can only hope—

Oh, it’s such a despicable thing to hope for. Susan has poison in her soul, she swears she must. But Billy isn’t remotely hers and Max very much is.

* * *

Susan doesn’t know if it was actually her remark that spurred Neil to turn the blame on Billy or if this was the conclusion he would’ve come to anyway. Neil often blames Max’s mishaps and mischiefs on Billy. Billy being the older sibling meant to lead by example. Billy being the older brother, meant to keep his younger sister out of trouble to begin with.

Her remark or Neil’s default thought process, in any case, it’s Billy he’s glaring at in the living room. Angrily dictates that Billy take off his shirt, belt in hand. Susan grabs a very pale Max’s shoulders and begins to usher her down the hall.

“Where are you taking Maxine?”

Susan freezes, mouth going dry.

Neil’s looking their way now, brow arched, stern and skeptical.

“I-I—“

“She isn’t going to learn if she doesn’t watch, Susan,” he declares with no room for argument. “Bring her back.”

Susan swallows, hands tightening on Max’s shoulders. Something dies inside her when she turns her daughter around. She buries it silently as she’s buried so many other pieces before and avoids Max’s eyes boring into her as she marches her back to the living room. Neil motions for them to sit on the couch, sunlight glinting off the metal buckle. Billy doesn’t bother to disguise his disdain, glaring murder, nostrils flaring like an ornery bovine. Susan suspects he’ll pay for this too.

“Your behavior today was beyond inappropriate, Maxine,” Neil tells her coldly. “Unnatural, disgusting, absolutely unacceptable.”

Max squirms next to Susan, hands tucking under her thighs. She is stone faced but this close, Susan can feel her shaking.

“Now, I know it’s not all your fault. Big Brother here’s taught you—“

“I didn’t teach her shit!” Billy cuts him off, sharp and acidic. “I told her to steer clear from Sinclair, this isn’t on me!”

Neil punches his son in the stomach with all the affect of swatting a fly, once, twice. Susan flinches. Billy’s gasping, breath knocked out of him. He staggers and Neil viciously shoves him to the floor.

“She saw you with that faggot’s tongue down your throat, don’t think I don’t know! I know you, I know the kind of shit you think you can get away with behind my back!” Neil roars like thunder. “Well, now it’s my turn to teach her a thing or two! Pay attention, Maxine!”

Max stiffens beside her. She opens her mouth to protest and Susan grabs her arm, sinking her nails in. Startled, Max's eyes dart to her. Susan gives a tiny shake of the head, urging her not to speak. Max bends her elbow like a chicken wing and jerks her arm out of Susan’s grasp. Ire flares in her gaze but she holds her tongue. She does not challenge Neil as he begins beating Billy with the belt.

Susan can’t watch. She lowers her eyes to the floor. She can see the movement in the shadows, Neil’s rapid whipping of the improvised weapon and Billy’s form jolting with the blows. Susan shuts her eyes to the shadows but she can still hear it, thick, hard leather striking bare flesh.

“Don’t turn away, Maxine,” Neil barks at some point between the sounds of violence.

Billy doesn’t cry out. Eventually it’s over. Susan raises her head and cannot bear more than a glance at her stepson braced on his hands and knee. The belt now rests at Neil’s side and still, her stomach is churning.

“If there is ever a repeat of the conduct you displayed today, there will be consequences. Is that understood, Maxine?”

Max looks to Susan. Her eyes are wavering. Then they glean whatever it is they were searching for from Susan’s and harden.

“Yes,” she mumbles.

“Yes, what?”

Max clears her throat.

“Yes, sir,” she corrects, louder and clearer.

“Both of you to your rooms,” he commands. “I want both of you to reflect on your actions until it’s time for dinner.”

“Yes, sir,” Billy answers this time, climbing to his feet in the corner of Susan’s eye. She remains on the couch as her daughter rises and plods down the hall, cheeks as red as the cherry atop a sundae. Flushed as red as the welts on Billy’s back that have Susan’s stomach in ropes even though she only spares a brief glance.

Neil sets the belt aside and plops down in his armchair. “Can you get me a beer, Susan?”

She nods and rises, quietly fetching one. Pops the tab and then passes it to him before she excuses herself. In times like this, Susan wants to leave more than anything. She wants to grab Max and take her far, far away. But she can’t imagine they would get anywhere, truly.

Neil controls the finances. Susan makes less money than he does and every cent she does earn inevitably winds up under Neil’s attentive purview. In a distant, ostensible kind of way Susan understands there are shelters for women in her situation. Shelters out there, somewhere…aren’t there? For her situation?

Neil hasn’t actually put his hands on her. Not yet. Not like what he just did to Billy. Hasn’t actually done so to Max, although the threat of that unfolded in the living room in a way that could not be more crystal clear. The threat alone feels like a fist to Susan, invisible fist clenched tight around her insides and squeezing so hard she's nauseous.

Is the threat enough? Would Susan and Max be accepted on the basis of threats alone?

Provided she could ever find such a place to begin with. Susan doesn’t have the faintest clue of where to look for what feels more like a nebulous fantasy of a sanctuary than a tangible reality. A shimmering oasis in the desert. Even if she were to locate such a place, what if it were at full capacity?

What if she and Max got turned away?

That would mean choosing between being homeless or going back to Neil. Going back to Neil after a failed escape would certainly mean him making good on all those threats of his, the ones verbal and non. The examples explicit in his words and implicit in his actions. Above all, any failed escape would certainly ensure there would be no second escape.

Susan isn’t going anywhere. And neither is Max. The very notion is abstract and distorted, floating just out of reach in a gaussian blur of a wish. Their home isn’t a good home. But it is the home they have and so, Susan will simply have to do her best to make sure Max never does anything like this again. That Max never does anything to get Neil’s attention like that, nothing to stoke the coals always smoldering in his choleric soul. That as painful as it's sure to be, Max learns to keep certain parts of herself under lock and key.

When dinner is in the oven and Neil is engrossed in his program, Susan slips off to Max’s bedroom. She knocks quietly and lets herself in. Her throat knots up at the tear tracks on her daughter’s cheeks, far more gutting than the way she bristles as Susan steps closer, the sheer hurt in her eyes.

“What do you want?”

The same things as you, Susan thinks irresistibly. And I’d go after them too, if I didn’t know better.

“I’m sorry, Max.”

Max huffs and turns away. “Whatever.”

“I am.”

“No you’re not. You’re just like Neil, you think I’m disgusting,” Max spits, hiking her legs up on the bed and hugging her knees to her chest. “You think Billy’s disgusting too, you couldn’t even look at him.”

“No, I don’t…oh, Max.” Susan swallows and lowers herself to a sit beside her on the bed, gently placing a hand on her knee. She swallows her heartbreak when Max’s eyes flash as though the touch scalds her. “Neil and I disagree about many things. This is one of them.”

“Then why didn’t you say that?” The blaze in Max’s eyes dies down, voice softening to cinders. “Why didn’t you stop him?”

“Oh, he’s so much bigger than me, Max.” Susan sags with familiar defeat. “And I— I don’t think it’s wrong, you and this girl.”

“Lucy.”

“I’m sure Lucy is lovely,” leaves Susan’s lips, this fragile whisper she dares not tempt fate to speak above. “I could never think that you’re disgusting. But I’m just me, Max, and Neil is bigger, and the world…the world too, is so much bigger than I am. You can’t— never, ever in public.”

Max’s eyes widen. Susan shifts on the bed and moves her hands, finds both of Max’s and squeezes tight.

“You cannot be open with feelings like that. You can’t take girls to your school dances, you can’t kiss them where other people could see.”

Max lets out an angry growl even as her eyes well up.

“It’s not fair!”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

“That’s not good enough!”

“I know.” She knows, oh, she knows, she’s never not choking on it.

Max chews her lip, scarlet and fuming. Susan halfway expects her daughter to headbutt her or holler right in her ear until she deafens. But after a moment it’s almost as if Max can decode all the things she cannot say because her hands twist under Susan’s and intertwine their fingers.

#my fic tag #susan hargrove #max mayfield #neil hargrove #billy hargrove #kinda an inversion of that one fandom trope #ig

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wonderofasunrise · 3 years ago

Note

32 or 61 for Kerry/Susan please ❤️

#61 - "I'm pregnant."

Okay, I'm letting the cat out of the bag now - I have a WIP, a passion project of some sorts in the form of a multi-chapter Kerry/Susan AU fic. I've been working on it on and off for months, writing whatever I can come up with out of order (a process which involves at least three different Google Docs files for notes etc and not-so-subtly tweeting about it every now and then), and I can't promise anything because I just...well, suck at planning things ahead especially when it comes to writing anything lengthy (unless it's an academic essay *laughs nervously*). Fingers crossed I will be able to post the whole thing someday - if and *only* if I manage to finish it in advance, because I love the idea so much I don't want to take the risk of posting it early and writing as I go along...only to (God forbid) abandon it. I don't want to give away too much, but hopefully you'll get the gist from this excerpt of one of the chapters I've managed to finish:

“Susan?” a voice calls me almost immediately as I step out of the cubicle. I look up in a swift move to find the source of the voice, and sure enough my head starts to spin again. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see none other than Kerry Weaver—her bright red hair kind of gives it away—with a very concerned look on her face, which I try my best to ignore.

Slowly, I make my way to the nearest basin, and just as my hand is about to turn the faucet another wave of nausea surges over me. Please do not vomit, please do not vomit, it was bad enough to storm out of a fucking trauma but to vomit in front of Kerry of all people…?

“Are you okay?” she asks just as my nausea passes, the tone of her voice as concerned as her expression. I know that at this point even saying a single syllable will bring back the nausea, so I simply nod.

“Are you sure? I was in the trauma room, and I was just as surprised as everyone else to see you storm out like that…”

“Yes, Kerry, I’m fine,” I suddenly snap, though immediately I can feel guilt lingering over me as I know Kerry is genuinely worried. Say what you want about her, the woman does care about the wellbeing of her colleagues (or employees? Whatever.). I glance at her while putting some water into my mouth, somewhat grateful that I don’t see any sign of her being offended. If anything, her expression grows even more worried, and I know that at this point there is nothing I say that can ease her concern.

“Okay,” Kerry says, seemingly giving in. “It’s just—you normally have the best composure of the lot, and I never expected a trauma to affect you that badly, that’s all…Susan? Can you walk?”

Her concerned tone returns as soon as she catches the sight of me dropping to my knees, no doubt thanks to me turning around too quickly after I finished my business in the sink. Instinctively one of my hands travels to my stomach, and I pray to all that’s holy that the gesture somehow goes unnoticed by Kerry, who is now kneeling next to me, her crutch abandoned, with one of her hands on my back.

“Can you stand up?” she asks in a tone that I would never expect Kerry Weaver to use when speaking to an adult. I nod, though I myself am not quite sure. I try anyway, with one of my hands still firmly on my stomach and the other holding onto Kerry for support. Once I get back on my feet, I let go of the other woman and I take a deep breath, relieved when no more sign of nausea kicks in. I try to make my way out of the ladies’ room, and I can feel Kerry’s eyes firmly on my back as I turn around—more carefully this time.

“You know, if you’re not feeling good, you can go home and rest,” she says. “I-I would hate to see you not in your prime at work, and more importantly it’s clear you really can do with a rest. We have a busy day ahead, and if you’re...feeling like you’re not up for it, you can go home. I can cover for you.”

I can tell she chose her words carefully, and she tried her best not to insinuate that I am not up for a busy day at work. Heck, she knows I’m more than capable—I’m one of her best attendings, after all, but still…who can really guess what Kerry Weaver actually means?

As for going home and resting, I can’t deny that I need it badly. I barely got any sleep last night, partly due to anxiety ahead of my appointment with Coburn this morning, and who can guarantee that I won’t storm out of another trauma? Still, part of me is trying to fight the urge to go home, because work is the best form of distraction I can think of and at home I know I will drive myself mad over everything, with no one to talk to and all.

“I’m pregnant,” I suddenly blurt out, the words coming out of my mouth far more quickly than I could comprehend. My eyes grow wide at the realization of what I just said, to Kerry of all people, and I try to avoid her eyes so much it’s ridiculous.

Unexpectedly enough, Kerry steps closer toward me, and she puts a hand on my shoulder. Just as unexpectedly, I find the gesture quite comforting, and God knows I have been deprived of comfort for far too long the last couple of weeks. It doesn’t feel as awkward as one would expect, coming from Kerry Weaver, and I sigh as I let her hand give my shoulder a gentle squeeze.

“How-how far along are you?” she asks in a tone that can barely conceal her surprise.

“Four weeks. I-I saw Coburn this morning,” I say with a shrug. She nods, and then lets go of my shoulder so that she can focus on looking me in the eye, which always makes for an interesting sight thanks to our significant height difference.

“In that case,” she states matter-of-factly, “You should go home and rest. I don’t want you to feel worse than you already do. Go home, get something to eat, and rest. I’ll cover for you for the rest of the shift.”

Now that sounds more like the Kerry Weaver that everyone knows and loves (though that part is still up for debate, I reckon). At this point I know there is no use fighting with her, so I nod and turn back to the door, silently hoping that somehow nobody will pay any attention.

“Kerry?” I mutter, suddenly remembering something important before we part ways. Letting her know of my pregnancy is bad enough (though it’s by no means a fault on her part); having everyone else know before I’m ready will be a disaster. I have enough on my plate at the moment, and the last thing I need is being the center of the latest ER gossip. “Um…thank you for letting me go home for the day, and I guess—well, I would really appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone. I have too much to deal with at the moment,” I say in a voice so low I will be surprised if she actually listens.

But apparently she did, because she nods and puts a hand on one of my arms and gives it a gentle squeeze—which, again, does not feel as awkward as one would expect coming from her.

“Of course,” she responds. “It’s not my call to let people know. It’s yours, and yours only. Don’t worry about it.”

And with that, I mouth a thank you before exiting the ladies’ room, trying my best to forget everything that has happened today. It’s not even noon yet, and too much has already taken place. Perhaps Kerry is right: I really can do with a rest.

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lia-jones · 3 years ago

Text

Growing Together - Chapter Twenty-Two - Goodbye Is a Silent Word (Part One)

Author's note: So sorry for the no-show! I just got a new job and training was exhausting, and it was hard to keep up with the writing. Hopefully, everything will normalize now! I hope you enjoy, and if you can write me a line, it always makes my day! Lots of love!

Things moved swiftly after we received the terrible news of Mina’s passing. As expected, after the initial shock, Victor quickly assumed his focused, hands-on demeanor and in less than an hour, we had picked Owen up from school, gone to the apartment to speedily pack our bags, and got in the car to go to Terry’s ranch, where we would spend the next two days, preparing for Mina’s final goodbye.

The drive was tense, to say the least. Victor and I had yet to say a word about our previous argument, so it felt like all the accusations, all the anguish and potential apologetic words were buzzing between us, wanting to be heard, yet superseded by the noisy chaos of the recent events.

Victor was silent, seemingly calm, focused on the road ahead. It took a wife’s keen eye to notice by his posture that there was tension on his shoulders, and that although his eyes seemed focused on the road, I could see the struggle in them, telling me he was weathering an emotional storm.

Understandably, Victor was in a fragile place, so I decided to forget about our fight and the unresolved issues between us, at least for the time being, and simply be there for him in whatever way he needed me to be.

Mina’s death seemed to affect my son as well, despite having only met her a few times. He was unusually silent, kept within himself, his mind busy with thoughts that I didn’t know but worried me.

“Terry’s organizing Mia’s funeral?” I decided to break the silence, as I felt it suffocating me.

Victor let out a long exhale.

“I am.” He finally spoke after a long moment. “I already spoke with Terry, I’m taking care of everything.”

“Have you spoken to any of Mina’s relatives?” I suggested. “We should call her family before making any major decisions. Maybe there are traditions they want to see followed.”

“We are her family.” He answered in a low voice. “She had no one else.”

For a moment, I could swear I heard a twinge of guilt in his tone. There was a glint of sadness in his eyes, lasting but a second, only to be replaced with his well-known poker face. I kicked myself internally for bringing the subject up. I felt like holding his hand, telling him that he did the best that he could, he couldn’t have known, he shouldn’t feel guilty. But given the circumstances, and how evasive Victor was being, I wasn’t sure if my gesture would be well received. I decided to refrain from reaching out, waiting for him to come to me when he felt ready.

“Do you think dying hurts?” Owen spoke from the backseat, diverting my thoughts.

I froze, not really knowing how to answer his question. By my side, Victor tensed, his grip on the wheel tightening even more.

“I don’t know, Bug. I guess it depends on how one dies.” I tried to close the subject.

“Do you think Mina hurt?” He looked at me with inquisitive eyes.

“No, I don’t think she did.” I lowered my voice as if whispering my answer would be less painful for Victor.

“What about my mother?” He asked again. “Does killing yourself hurt?”

My heart sank with sadness, seeing my son, at such a tender age, already considering things like death and the loss of a loved one.

“I wouldn’t know. I hope it doesn’t.” I gave him a tender look.

“Do you think there is a Heaven?” He kept going, this time not even pausing to get an answer. “Do you think Mina went to Heaven? Do you think my mother is there? Miss Dillon says hurting yourself is a sin, do you think God forgave her? And if He didn’t, where do you think she is now? Do you think Mina can tell her I’m alright? Do you think they can see us from-”

“Enough!” Victor roared inside the car, making both me and Owen jump. After a sharp, deep breath, he continued in a flat tone. “Can we please make the rest of the trip in silence?”

“Maybe we could talk about it later, ok, Bug?” I reached back, squeezing his knee, trying to soften the blow of Victor’s outburst.

Silence fell between us, pregnant with words that wouldn’t be uttered. Owen, however, seemed to have more to say.

“I’m sorry Mina died, Dad.”

Victor’s face contracted in a very brief grimace. He felt guilty for yelling, I could tell.

“Yes.”

Victor’s expression swiftly shifted back to his characteristic emotionless one. And I could swear that, at that moment, I could see him diligently rebuilding those unbreakable walls, the ones he surrounded his heart with, the ones that protected the sensitive and fragile side of him from the rest of the world. Only this time I felt I was being kept out as well.

The iron gates that led to Terry’s ranch, the same we had seen covered in flowers and lights nearly a year ago, were now adorned by a black ribbon tied in a single knot, signaling the death of a loved one in the house. As they opened wide and we passed that threshold, we all felt the weight of that new reality: a life without Mina.

Mina was not someone we saw very often or that would take much time in our lives, but when she was present, she filled them with love. She was wise and kind, with an assertiveness that wasn’t imposing, but welcome, just like a bright sun entering a room, warm and cozy, staving away the darkness. And now that she was gone, all the space she filled now vacant, I couldn’t help but think of all the things that we would miss about her.

We would no longer be greeted by her bright smile and warm hands holding ours, and I would never see again the tender gaze she had for Victor, and how he responded in kind, with a calm welcoming expression he saved for her alone. I would no longer feel the warmth of how much she seemed to dote on him, always surprising us with his favorite foods or a box full of taffy, and calling him Hummingbird, although he insisted on being called by his name. I would no longer feel the occasional hand squeezing my shoulder, usually when we were alone, her way of approving of me and the way I loved her boy.

“You will stay with Owen at the ranch while I take care of the funeral arrangements.” Victor stated as he stopped the car in front of the mansion.

“No, I want to go with you.” I declared. “I don’t want to leave you alone.”

Victor let out another long tired sigh. When he finally opened his mouth to retort, he was interrupted by Terry tapping on his window. He rolled it down.

“Come inside, already.” She smiled widely, although I could see the sadness in her eyes. “The food will get cold.”

“We assumed you guys skipped lunch, so we prepared a meal for you.” Susan welcomed us, as we entered the mansion.

“Nothing too fancy, just some soup.” Terry chimed in. “I’m not much of a cook, most of the cooking was done by-”

“Do you have the documents?” Victor interrupted, still standing by the door, clearly uninterested by small talk at the moment.

“They are in the study waiting for you as I promised.” Terry walked to Victor and took his arm, pulling him inside. “But now it’s time to eat. It won’t do you any good to go through today on an empty stomach. Besides, your son wants to eat, right, Owen?”

“Right.” Owen almost whispered, his expression still a sullen one.

“Are you sad, sweetheart?” Terry came closer to Owen, ruffling his curls. “No long faces, Mina wouldn’t want that. She wanted all of us to be happy, and live long and fulfilling lives. That’s how she would want to be honored. Now, let’s all eat and spend time as a family.” She waved at us to come inside the kitchen.

Victor turned away, excusing himself, as Owen and I sat at the table.

“Do you mind staying with Aunt Terry while Dad and I are away?” I squeezed the boy’s shoulder lovingly.

“Of course he won’t mind!” Terry made a face at him, making him laugh. “Susan can use some extra help in the stables. Will you help her take care of the horses?”

“Can I?” Owen’s face lit up.

Before any of us could answer, we heard the sound of an engine starting outside.

“Is Victor leaving?” Terry got up from her seat.

Without much thought, I ran outside, not believing he would leave without me. Sure enough, Victor was in his sedan pulling away. Noticing my presence by the front door, he paused his departure for a moment, catching my glance. The pain in his eyes was unbearable for me to watch, and I lowered my gaze. A second later, he started moving again, leaving in a hurry, a cloud of dust billowing up behind him.

“He took the documents from the study.” Terry came by my side. “He must have gone to the morgue.”

I stood at the door for a moment, considering Victor’s actions. Clearly, there wouldn’t be a chance for reconciliation in the near future, since he didn’t even want me around.

“The food is getting cold.” Terry grabbed my arm, a knowing look on her face.

I couldn’t say a word after, lost in my own thoughts, playing with my food. At least Owen was doing much better than I was, the prospect of playing with the horses distracting him from his father’s mood and sudden absence. Truth was, in a blink of an eye, I felt like I had lost my footing. Victor and I had fought before, and some of those fights were incredibly ugly, but never have I ever felt so distant from him. Never had he deliberately walked away from me. That was more painful than any nasty words he could ever say to me.

Susan took Owen to the stables after lunch, while I stayed behind with Terry, helping her clean the kitchen. Again, we worked in silence, Terry probably remembering Mina going on and about in her duties, while I was wondering how Victor was, if he missed me by his side, if I should call to check up on him.

“This is the last one.” I declared, putting away the last clean plate. “Do you need my help with anything else?”

“I’m so glad you asked.” She laughed with relief. “Follow me.”

We entered Mina’s room like it was a temple, silently and respectfully. The room was large, humbly yet tastefully decorated. Over the antique dresser, nothing but a vase with some dried flowers and a book. It was amazing how the whole room spoke of Mina. It was simple and modest, but it had a cozy and loving energy, just like her: a silent yet powerful tenderness.

“Susan was supposed to help me with this, but it’s best that she stays with Owen. And I didn’t want to ask Victor. It would be too painful for him.” Terry apologized, opening one of the drawers. “We need to find something suitable for Mina to wear.”

Silently, Terry and I went through Mina’s clothes, taking several items out. Terry took a box out of the wardrobe, sitting on the bed with a ragged sigh as she opened it.

“Victor should have this.” She handed it to me.

It was a simple shoebox lined with wrapping paper, but inside there was a treasure. There were many little objects: a children’s uniform tie, a Rubik’s cube, a pair of baby socks. The rest of the box was filled with pictures of Victor throughout the years, and newspaper cuttings from articles about him since he started LFG. It was the kind of thing a mother would have. My mother had the same things for me and my brother. I gave Mina a silent thank you for loving my husband so well over all these years.

“When my sister-in-law left to live in Paris, Victor was in a pretty bad state.” Terry commented, as she took the small tie from the box. “I never understood how she could leave Victor behind like that, especially knowing my brother and how he always treated his son. It always got to me how Victor idolized her, still does, and she never deserved any of his love. Mina was his real mother.”

She handed me the tie, and for a moment I could picture my husband as a child, poised and oddly mature, wearing that uniform. And I wondered if he had his poker face even then, or if he had sadness in his eyes, the same emotion he now hid, at that time so perfectly open and visible to the outside world.

“Mina would ask him to help her in the kitchen, and they would talk for hours on end, as they peeled potatoes, or baked a cake. She was his biggest support in that cold house. Until Greg decided his son was spending too much time with the help.” Terry let out a bitter laugh. “God forbid he would let that boy have something good in his life.”

“What did he do?”

“One morning, he simply told Mina to pack her bags and leave immediately. Victor begged his father to let her stay, but Mina decided it would be best to leave, and not make any more trouble for the boy. She ended up at my doorstep, asking for a place to stay while she looked for another job.”

“And she stayed ever since.” I smiled at Terry, my heart full of love for her.

“I hired her on the spot, knowing how much that would mean to Victor. And she became my family.”

I looked at the room again, her presence feeling so much stronger now. She was so simple, so humble, yet she could take so much room in one’s heart.

“Don’t take Victor’s actions too seriously. He needs time to wrap his head around this. You must know as well as I do that he isn’t very good at dealing with his own emotions.” Terry squeezed my arm.

My eyes immediately filled with tears, all the painful recent events coming to mind.

“No, it’s that… Things are not well, Terry.” It hurt to talk, my throat suddenly feeling incredibly tight. “We had an ugly fight today, that’s probably why he is avoiding me. Owen’s grandmother showed up and filed for custody, we are at risk of losing him... It’s been stressful.”

“Dear God, Andrea! No wonder both of you look so stressed.”

“And now he is cold, and he doesn’t want me near him. And I feel like I’m losing it all, everything is slipping from my hands…” I sobbed in desperation. “I don’t know what to do. I’m so sorry for breaking down like this.”

“No need to be sorry, we are family.” She stroked my back soothingly, as I let out the tears I had been holding all this time. “I understand how you would feel that way, but I know my nephew and I know you. First of all, it’s Victor, that woman does not stand a chance. He will not let his son go due to anything in this world, of that I am certain. And second of all, Victor adores you. In no time, he will be here with us, fussing over you like he always does. You love each other, I’m sure you will work it out.”

Looking at the bigger picture, Terry was probably right. We were going through a stressful time, and we just had a fight, as many couples do. From the point of view of the observer, we had been tried and tested many times before, and we always stood strong, no matter how much we swayed. But I knew Victor, and I knew this wasn’t just a lovers’ quarrel to him. He never let himself feel too much, but when he did, he felt deeply. I had gone against his plans, questioned his decisions, when he was trying his best for our family. Maybe he was right to be angry at me. I should have been more supportive. But I also couldn’t ignore what my heart was telling me.

After we picked the outfit for Mina, Terry went to the study to make some work-related phone calls, leaving me to my own devices. I was tired of thinking about the past few days, overanalyzing each one of my and Victor’s words, so I decided to go to the living room and read something while I waited for Owen to return from the stables. Or Victor. And that’s when I saw it.

The piano must have felt lonely in that living room, looking like it hadn't been touched in decades. I sat on the stool and opened the lid, my finger running over the keys without pressing them; a greeting of sorts. For a moment, I wondered why there would even be a piano in Terry’s house, since it was evident that nobody played it, but then it hit me: it must have belonged to Victor’s mother. Victor’s parents owned the property for a while, so they probably left it behind.

“You can play it, it’s tuned.” Terry spoke from the hall.

“I don’t want to be disrespectful.” I said as I slowly closed the lid.

“It’s actually very fitting. Mina loved when my sister-in-law played it.” Terry smiled, coming close to me to open the lid again. “That gives me an idea. Would you play some music at the funeral?”

How could I refuse?

“What do you want me to play?”

“There is one that Mina liked in particular, I don’t know which.” Terry went to the bookshelf, retrieving an old leather folder. “But I have some scores here, see if there is something appropriate.”

I took the folder from her hands, opening it. On top of the first sheet of music, I could read the title Serenade, by Schubert, Listz’s arrangement.

It wasn’t a hard piece to play I had learned it around the age of eleven. It took me a while to get reacquainted with the melody, but after a few strokes of the keys, it became second nature all over again, allowing me to submerge deeply into the music, letting feeling take over, so much that I didn’t even notice Terry leaving the room. At that moment, I was a lover serenading someone, and my beloved responded in kind with the higher notes, telling me my love was reciprocated.

A hand came from behind me, pressing on my dancing ones, a dissonant chord echoing in the living room. It was Victor, a shadow in his eyes I had never seen before.

“Not this one.” He declared in a tired tone.

“Terry asked me to play for Mina’s funeral.” I hurried to answer, almost scared he would scold me. “I assumed it was her favorite one.”

Without a word, Victor took the leather folder, skimming through it. He handed me a few sheets of paper. The title read Reverie - Debussy.

“This one.” He declared as he turned to leave.

“How did it go?” I spoke before he disappeared again. “You left without me.”

Victor stood without a word, his eyes on the ground, not daring to look at me. The clench of his jaw told me he was deciding to ignore me yet again.

“Dad! Dad!” We heard Owen run towards us. “Susan let me feed the horses! And Onyx was so cool, he did one of those tricks you taught him.” Owen jumped with excitement to Victor, arms up, expecting his father to pick him up like he always did.

“Right.” Victor muttered, ignoring Owen’s silent request and leaving the room.

I couldn’t react for a moment, seeing how my husband, the most loving father I had ever seen apart from my own, was acting towards our son. This wasn’t the Victor I knew. This was someone else entirely.

“Why is he mad at me?” Owen’s voice trembled. My heart broke as my eyes landed on my son: he looked like the scared little boy we had picked from the orphanage, small and fragile, his shoulders slouched and his head down, afraid of making the slightest movement.

“Come here, Bug.” I opened my arms and he ran into them, taking refuge in my embrace. “Dad is not mad at you, he’s just sad. Some people show sadness by crying, your father gets weird like this.”

“Just like when he looked scary but just wanted to be my friend?” Owen spoke against my chest.

“Exactly like that.” I stroked his red curls. “Your father will always love you, as I will. You’re just too adorable.” I tickled his ribs, making him giggle.

“Can I watch you play?” He gave me that honest and bright smile of his, comforting my heart.

“Not until you do a scale with me.” I pretended to scold him. “You won’t be able to progress if you don’t practice, Mister.”

After practicing the scale for a few moments, I turned my attention to the score Victor had given me. I almost didn’t need the score for this one, I knew it by heart, my teacher was a big admirer of Debussy. I started playing the song, putting my entire soul in it, reliving my teacher’s expressions as my fingers brought the music to life.

And then I noticed it in the reflection on the piano’s reflective varnished wood, above the keys. The sunset had revealed him, standing by the doorway, secretly listening to me play, his head down. I didn’t look back or acknowledge his presence. Instead, I put all my love into those notes, hoping it would soothe his heart, would bring him the comfort he wouldn’t allow me to express.

#mlqc victor #mldd victor #love and producer #mister love queens choice #mister love dream date #Growing Pains - Series #growingtogether #mlqc li zeyan #mlqc fanfic #victor x oc

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boredfanwrites · 4 years ago

Text

Love, Simon Harringrove AU

I'm sorry (not really) this is probably a bit long but I've already started writing this fic and these are just outline bullet points.

Anyway, what I mean is after a short reprieve following the submission of my assignment: I'm back and please take this poor persons Harringrove AU.

First - Billy isn't as big of an asshole (my AU so I say so).

Second - modern day, pretty much exactly the same setting as Love, Simon.

Third - Neither of them have their cars, this is important later.

Fourth - I have complete control over characters so if I say Barb lives, Barb lives.

Moving on.

Steve is Simon, Billy is Brahm but also not really.

Steve is the one to kick things off, he places an ad in their school paper, not blog because he knows fewer people read the papers and the kind of people Steve wants to meet are the kind that pick up the papers.

He intends to communicate through the ads but the editor adds the email address he'd created to send in the submission.

Hi, lets get things straight: I'm not. I'm gay. I'm not expecting advice or a congrats or whatever. Hell you don't even need to publish it. I just, I needed to get it off my chest somewhere. I've spent my whole life either not knowing, or hiding when I realised. I don't know why I'm even doing this. I don't wanna be alone anymore, I think that's it. I can't be alone. I'm gay, that's normal, I'm fine the way I am. I'm sick of hiding, but I don't think I'm ready to truly come out.

In comes Billy, reading Steve's little piece, obviously not knowing its Steve. And against his better judgement Billy finds himself writing a reply.

I'm like you. Gay that is. I've known since I was thirteen and I kissed a boy in the bathroom of a dingy movie theatre. I've been hiding ever since. I've always been scared of what it meant. But maybe I'm not so alone. If you want a friend in this, I can be one.

It's the first time Billy's admitted it out loud, even if it is only on an electronic document. It's his first admission that he's not the son his father wants him to be so desperately.

Max is still his step-sister, but he gets along with her far better in the AU. She's still a little shit of a sister but she knows when to back off and Billy knows to not take his anger out on her. It's not her fault.

They don't have a good sibling relationship in the slightest but they're doing ok.

Steve still drives around the nerd herd. Still babysits Dustin - though it's less babysitting more making sure he doesn't accidentally kill himself.

Steve reads through the reply, the only reply he'd gotten and he's thankful. He wanted a friend so badly. He had Robin, of course, they were both gay but it was kinda difficult to give each other advice, dating or general LGBTQ+, when they didn't like the same gender. Steve could give a few tips but his track record left nothing to be desired. And Robin barely interacted with boys.

Steve has Jonathon and Nancy, but they don't know so it's not the same. Not really. Besides they're usually too coupley to give a shit about his poor sad single life half the time.

Billy and Steve are hesitant friends, they're both friends with Jonathon so are civil to each other, they're around each other a lot but they're not friends.

So Steve writes something back, and so does Billy. They ask the stereotypical icebreaker questions: favourite foods, colours, places etc. But they both want to dig a little deeper.

After a few emails, Steve suggests fake names to sign off with, a way to get closer.

Billy agrees but only if they can be named after their absolute dream cars - Billy is stuck driving Neil's beaten down pile of crap and needs to remind himself what he's working towards.

So they become Beemer and Camaro and boy does Billy have a field day with Beemer.

Regardless, having names to address each other by leads them to open up more. The person on the other side of the screen becoming more real.

Steve talks about how he's not doing so good academically but he wants to be, he's trying but it's never enough. How nothing is ever good enough for his parents but they're never around to see him either.

He mentions that there's this kid he looks after and how he's basically the little brother he never had and how much his mom wants to adopt him. Steve admits if it wasn't for appearances he's sure his parents would jump at the chance.

Billy admits that as much as he can get along with his stepsister she can be such a little shit. He's supposed to look after her but 'she's 13 for god's sake, she has her own mobile phone, and I can't do anything' and how his dad will beat on him if she's not home by a certain time.

It frustrates Billy to no end because even she's home by curfew she'll offhandedly mention something else that Billy did that his dad didn't like him doing. His dad finds a lot of reasons to punch Billy black and blue.

Steve finally gets given his own walkie and he feels honoured. He uses it to communicate with everyone, but Dustin informed him there's a special channel just for Steve that is one on one if the others ever need him and only him. Steve teared up a little bit.

Billy's been happier than ever talking to Beemer and Neil notices, starts finding even smaller reasons: not placing his plate in the dishwasher, not picking up after Max, not helping Susan unpack the groceries (he wasn't even home, how was he supposed to know?).

Max isn't an idiot. And one night she hears a resounding thud and Neil storming off and the shattering of glass. An engine rumbles and roars down the street. Max races into Billy's room, only to find the boy unconscious on the floor. She screams for her mom but Susan pretends not to hear, so she does the only other thing she can think of.

Steve has been having worse bouts of insomnia so he's awake, trying to be productive when his walkie goes off. Imagine his shock and horror when Max’s voice heaves out between sobs that Billy isn’t waking up. So of course he grabs his keys and goes running.

Billy wakes up to Max’s heavy breathing and an unfamiliar pressure just below his left eye. He struggles to open them but then hears a familiar voice telling him to ‘relax, don’t force it. You’re gonna have a great shiner in the morning but other than that you’ll be ok.’ And Billy knows that voice, that’s Harrington. Why is Harrington in his house?

An hour later, both eyes open and a few scratches patched up, Billy and Steve sit on the end of his bed, Max on the floor in front of them. None of them say anything, but Steve holds out a pinky to Billy and Billy takes it.

A few days after Steve takes a moment to think. Camaro said his dad beats on him. Unless Billy got in a fight earlier and it was a delayed reaction it could only be his dad.

So Steve tests the waters, admittedly his most stupid mistake.

I was trying to be productive a few nights ago. You know how my insomnia is getting. Anyway one of the friends of the kid I babysit called me and said her brother wasn’t waking up. I go over there, patch him up and then we don’t really say anything else. I’m glad my first aid training came in to play, lord knows I’ve patched the kids up too many times. But it was the weirdest experience of my life, honestly.

Camaro drops off the face of the earth. So does Billy. The only reason Steve knows he’s alive is because both Jonathon and Tommy text him updates from time to time. Tommy doesn’t go into detail, doesn’t really give a shit, just a thumbs up whenever he sees Billy.

But Jonathon. Steve is very thankful for Jonathon’s friendship. He tells Steve whenever there’s a new mark on him, how Hopper picked him up and Joyce had bailed him out. How Will was getting along with Billy so well since he’d camped out on their couch a few weeks ago.

It’s been so long. Months. And Steve is so lonely. Even before Camaro, he didn’t realise how much he and Billy actually interacted, how much time they’d spent together. It was back to just Steve and Robin. Which wasn’t bad, but wasn’t the same. Steve had given up hope.

Look. I know we know who each other is now. I know that’s not good English, I’ve had a couple beers so forgive me, King Steve. I like talking to you, I really do. But I meant it when I said I was scared. I can’t do this. Just give me a week or two, I’ll be back in school and we can go back to how it was. I’m sorry.

Steve doesn’t think it can go back to how it was.

Billy doesn’t want to go back to how it was. He doesn’t want to lose Steve now that he has him. But his body felt like it was falling apart most days. The only reprieve was the few nights every couple weeks he spent on the Byers’ couch. Even if he did get a worse beating after.

Steve tries to make life easier on Billy in the ways that he can. Brings Max back at least fifteen minutes before curfew, he offers to help Susan here and there when he sees her, offers to babysit Max if he’s looking after the rest of the nerd herd.

Neil likes him, Steve hates Neil. But he never sees Billy.

It comes to a head one day. Steve has to pick up Dustin when he hears arguing. Heading out to the back he sees Max stomping about, yelling at Billy and god, Billy just looks tired. So Steve heads over, places himself between the two and tells Max to wait with Dustin in the car.

He turns to Billy, sees his glassy eyes, and sees how much weight Billy has lost. And did all of this stem from him and Billy not talking or was there more.

Billy takes one look at Steve and breaks. He babbles nonsense about how he would never hurt Max, would never lay a finger on her. Steve shushes him, carefully placing his hands on Billy’s shoulders. Billy doesn’t notice.

Steve wonders where it came from, what was going through Billy’s head. He pulled him closer until Billy’s hands fisted in his shirt, a patch on Steve’s chest dampening.

I really fucking like you. You’re so good. And I’m scared, I’m so scared.

Billy. I really fucking like you too. It’s ok that you’re scared. I get it. I just want us to try. It doesn’t have to be now. It’s only ever gonna be when you’re ready but I’m going to be here.

Billy has only ever wanted someone who tried. Someone who was going to stick around for him. There Steve was, making promises. Being way too good for Billy.

Steve doesn’t let him go.

There’s gonna be a few scenes in the fic that weren’t mentioned, mostly because I will be writing this fic at some point and I want a few mysteries and extra stuff. Likewise for the emails, they’re all gonna be included.

Also, currently I’m not sure I like the ending, I was planning on doing a few fluffy, epilogue one-shots once the fic is done but I don’t know whether to keep the ending I’ve got or whether to stick more closely to the Love, Simon (Steve trying to do something big and public etc.). But for now, take what I have and be on the lookout for either the first instalment or just one long-ass fic in the near future.

#harringrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove #stranger things #steve stranger things #billy stranger things #billy x steve #max stranger things #love simon au #harringrove au #harringrove fic #stranger things fic #harringrove au headcanons #harringrove love simon au #harringrove au fic

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