#GOOD LORD HE’S HUNKY

[jyrinestories08]

“I watch Age of Extinction for the plot”

The plot:

[dipperscavern]

You have got me feral for Cregan (really all the stark men) and breeding, possessive big hunky lumberjack type of man. I need him to have a little wifey with one baby in her, two hanging off her arms and others running about and he’s just living the good life!! Haha obsessed

we’re ALWAYS feral for cregan over here (really all the stark men) ✊ holding his baby girl as his two boys run around the place causing mayhem (naturally) & your stomach is round with a third…. perchance…. he really is living the life!! (all the old weirdo northern lords are jealous)

[tiredfox64]

Can you do a Tomas x chubby reader where the reader isn't insecure about her body at all, and Tomas is still just as obsessed.

The Bigger the Figure, The Better He Likes You

Yip notes: I need him to hold me so I can win over his heart this is not a joke I need him.

Pairing: Tomas x Chubby! Afab reader

Warnings‼️: NSFW, thigh fucking

Beautiful, gorgeous, stunning, lovable, kissable, these are all words that Tomas would use to describe you. But he doesn’t have to tell you all that to let you know that for yourself. You know you’re a catch even with that belly.

You’ll wear whatever you want, eat whatever you want, do whatever you want without feeling insecure. If someone wants to stare at you for wearing a tank top so be it. If you’re comfortable in it why should it matter? Your belly should not offend anyone and if it does offend someone then that is just plain stupid. God gave you a wonderful body you will love and appreciate every part of it. From the stretch marks to the rolls, all of that is loved. Thanks, Lord Liu Kang.

You’re not the only one who loves your plump body. Your boyfriend Tomas absolutely adores it. Some would say he is even obsessed. Look into his eyes and tell me he’s not obsessed with you. That’s right, you can’t! You can see how his pupils dilate at the sight of you. Add in the fact that he keeps eye contact no matter what you have to say, yup, that man is in love.

He’s been like that since the first time you two met at the teahouse. Tomas felt the need to talk to you the moment his eyes fell on you. Although he was nervous, he knew it wouldn’t hurt him to talk to a pretty girl like you. He doesn’t regret that decision one bit because it all worked out.

Talking to you was a real treat. It was nice to talk to someone who wasn’t as sour as a lemon or as blunt as a bullet. That wonderful personality of yours made you even more beautiful in his eyes. So did your smile, your eyes, your hair…what were we talking about again?

But what Tomas loved the most about you was your confidence. Tomas doesn’t really have a type when it comes to women, mostly because he doesn’t interact with them a lot. You were the one to make him realize he loves a woman with confidence. It doesn’t matter if it’s about their body or a certain skill they have, if they are confident he loves em. But most importantly, he loves you. And once again because he could never say this enough times he loves that body of yours.

As you two grew closer you also began to grow closer physically. The distance between you two dwindled until you were cheek to cheek. The first time he hugged you was a big moment for him because you were the softest thing ever. He wanted to take you home, introduce you to his brothers, and cuddle with you in his room. But that would be kidnap so he can’t. He relished that warm hug until you were the first to let go. Did you even realize the effect you had on that man? Your softness gave him butterflies in his stomach and surrounded his heart with the kind of warmth only a cuddly kitty could give.

Eventually, he gained the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend. Obviously, you said yes. You’d be an idiot to turn down a gorgeous, hunky man with silvery hair and gray eyes that only look at you. Have you seen the muscles on that man? Of course you have, you feel them every time he hugs you from behind.

Good on you. You have yourself a good man who can protect you and hold you. Try getting out of his grasp I dare you. Tomas will have you sit on his lap in front of others just to show you off. You are his magnificent girlfriend and the world needs to know you are with him. The weight you provide is surprisingly comforting which is why he is hesitant to let you go. Just one more minute, please!

Tomas is also the greatest hype man. He loves it when you come around to show him your cute outfit or the newest dress you bought. If you were unsure if an outfit was not working, he would shut that uncertainty down. You could make anything look good on yourself and he would eat it up. He also eats up those lingerie sets you buy, golly. Those babydoll ones you buy are gonna send him to an early grave because his heart is going crazy. So is his dick.

How could something so soft and huggable be so fuckable at the same time? Tomas has to hold himself back when you put something like a slip dress or booty shorts on to go to sleep. Your plush thighs are on display for him, your breasts are begging for his attention. You’re teasing the poor man and you know it. It’s why you wear all that. It makes you feel sexy and you drive your boyfriend insane. It works every time.

Like right…

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

…now

Tomas was spooning you all night long. His head rested on your shoulder while his arms were wrapped around your waist. You love the warmth he provides, and the skin-to-skin contact you get.

Usually, you are the first to wake up since the Arctika weather finds a way to sneak inside, causing you to shiver awake. But since Tomas was keeping you warm he was the first to wake up this time. And he woke up extremely horny. Morning wood is no joke and he learned that after meeting you.

He groaned once his mind comprehended the feeling down there. His cock was begging to be freed from the confinement of his pants. He wanted to do something about it but he didn’t want to bother you. He could use his hands but your thick ass was right there. It was pressing up against his crotch. If he knows what’s good for him he would turn away now and deal with this by himself. But he can’t! It wouldn’t be fulfilling.

There Tomas was, grumbling as he nuzzled his face into your neck. He just wants to show you his love but he won’t disturb you since you were asle—

“What is it?” You asked in a sleepy voice.

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you up.” He apologized.

Half-awake, you tried to figure out what the problem was. When you adjusted yourself a little your ass rubbed against his crotch and you knew what the problem was. Hold on, check again. Try rubbing yourself against that hard and large object that “definitely isn’t his dick”.

You felt Tomas’ arms tighten around your waist as his breathing staggered. His hips thrusted into you as he let out a groan.

“Don’t tease me like that.” He begged. Wipe that smirk off your face you’re killing him right now.

Some may disagree but it may be too early in the morning to have sex. But you understand that Loverboy behind you needs to fix his situation, or you may never leave his bed. You lifted your slip dress up a little before sliding your panties off. You lifted your leg up and that let him know everything. Tomas knows what to do. It’s like giving a dog a ball they know what has to happen.

Tomas pulled down his pants, his hard cock springing out. His pinkish tip already had a bit of precum spilling out. He slid his cock in between your soft thighs. You closed them and he immediately had a reaction from having his cock be surrounded by warmth and plushness.

He slowly started sliding in and out, savoring every sensation your thighs give down to the base and up to the tip. Each stroke gets your pussy wetter as the tip rubs against your slit. Your wetness makes it easier for him to slide in and out. It encourages him to go faster. All you can hear now is his heavy breathing and the soft squishing sound that came from below.

Tomas lifted your slip dress so that your belly was exposed. His hands run over it as he continues thrusting between your thighs, occasionally grasping at the soft flesh of your belly. After a while his hand started to wander up until he grabbed your breasts. Fuck they were amazing to him. They fit so perfectly in his hand. They had a bit of weight to them with how large they were. He would look over your shoulder and watch as they jiggled from every thrust.

At this point you could feel the precum dripping onto your thigh and feel his cock slightly twitching. His thrusts became sloppier and his breathing hitched. He nuzzled his face against yours before he started cumming. Warm ropes of cum started splattering onto your thighs and the blankets that surrounded both of you. The squishing sound became louder with each little thrust he gave, dragging the cum in and out of your thighs. Once he was done he let out a sigh of relief. He finally let go of your poor breasts that he was squeezing roughly.

“Better?” You asked with a little chuckle.

“Much better,” Tomas replied before giving you a kiss on the cheek.

You tried to get up so you could grab a towel to clean up the mess but Tomas wasn’t having that. The moment you tried to move an inch away from him his arms wrapped around your waist and kept you in place.

“Tomas, we need to clean this up.”

“Later.” He replied bluntly.

Even with a mess between your thighs, he won’t let you go. He never even removed his cock from your thighs. It was becoming softer while being sandwiched between two pieces of heaven. You sighed as you accepted that you were stuck there

“I’m started to think you’re a little obsessed with me, or at least my body.” You joked.

“Is that really a bad thing? I think it’s good that I love my girlfriend so much.” He started peppering your face with kisses. You were all smiles after that.

See, I told you he’s obsessed with you. He loves ya. You can expect him to love you till his last breath which might be soon since he’s been meaning to ask you to sit on his face. Don’t hold back he can take your weight!

Yap notes: I'M NOT DEAD I JUST HAVE WRITERS BLOCK! I'M SORRY! DOES ANYONE WANT TO USE A TAZER TO MY HEAD THAT MIGHT KICKSTART ME! And yes I’m using a blinkie to warn I like to have some fun here. Adiós!

[boxturret]

One Tenth Scale Mata Nui

Mata Nui is a cool place, but did you ever feel that it was a bit...big for what it was?

The official maps put the island at 357 kio long, which if you take to be a stand in for kilometres¹, would make the island 357 kilometres long.

This lines up roughly with what we can see in the concept art: they say that Mata Nui is around the size of Denmark, the real measurement being 368km, and it matches with what we see in the Mata Nui Rising cgi video.

So that's all well and good, Mata Nui is 357km long, the GSR itself is 3300km tall, all hunky-dory, as long as you ignore some guy named Greggory yelling about how the robot is actually much bigger, but its fine to ignore him.

But now, actually consider what this means. Denmark is by no means a small country, it has a population of 6 million and would take hours to drive across by car on modern roads. Now that isn't an issue really, but in most media depicting the island its shown to be a place that can be traversed by foot or on animal back in a reasonable time frame.

But now let us look at this earlier map:

Initially the most interesting thing to me on this map was the 3rd measurement: the height of the Mangai volcano²

Now on the one hand, this was cool, now I know how tall to make the volcano, on the other hand... 23km seems pretty big.

It is. 23km is higher than Olympus Mons, the largest known volcano in the solar system, standing at only 21.9km. So that's pretty big. This made me start thinking about how far various things are apart and how long it would actually take and using some very VERY generous numbers I started plotting out how long it would take to actually get from place to place.

It wasn't very pretty. In the Mata Nui Online Game it would have taken Takua roughly 5 hours to walk from the beach to Ta-Koro, and another 18 to get to Onu-Koro using the highway. Now this would be fine in an epic like Lord of the Rings, but in Bionicle Mata Nui is consistently treated as a place people can pretty quickly get around on.

The Toa are running all over the place and bumping in to each other. Kopaka getting in to the Caldera at the top of the Mangai volcano isn't the equivalent of climbing 3 Mt Everests in a row, its just something he does [correction: It wasn't the caldera, but a lava pool half way up the mountain, so just 1.5 Mt Everests]. Takua travels all over the island in a pretty small amount of time, unless we're supposed to insert day long journeys in between every screen transition.

But then I noticed something. Something very interesting.

Now lets look at the two keys for the sizes on the released and the early map:

Seems pretty consistent, the sizes of the island are the same, a Toa is 1.6 bio on both (incidentally a real Toa figure is approximately 16cm tall), everything seems to match.

But then I counted the zeroes.

The old map has a kio being not 1000 bio, but 100!

You can even see it on the other version of the map.

Now this is incredibly interesting! This shrinks Mata Nui to 1/10th of its commonly accepted size! It goes from being the size of Denmark to being the size of the Isle of Man.

Which....really works a lot better! This turns Takua's trip from the beach from a 5 hour hike to a short half hour walk. This turns the cable car to Mt Ihu from a massive 70km mega structure to something that's dwarfed by real world constructions.

I don't think this is a mistake either, looking at the details of the map.

You have much finer details, such as these ice shelves collapsing in to small icebergs, whereas on the full sized map some of the larger chunks of ice are kilometres across.

One of the major things it includes are the mesas that can bee seen in many of the promotional renders set in Le-Wahi which are nowhere to be seen on the final map. At this 1/10 scale the plateaus seen would match up well with the massive mesas seen in monument valley in terms of size, but with the final size they would be absolutely massive (10 times as big if you can believe it!)

So suffice to say, I don't think this is just a case of a zero being dropped, it really seems to line up with the level of detail on this earlier map.

But what does this do to the GSR? I hear you cry, well it varies. Going by the earlier numbers it would simply be 1/10th the size, so 330km tall instead of 3300km, so still very large, but depending on the size relationship between the robot and the island it could be as "small" as 180km

The island in this picture is roughly the same size as normal, just covers more of the GSR. The final GSR's head is so proportionately tiny compared to its body that the Mata Nui island had to be very small to cover it. But in any case, a robot "only" 180km tall standing up is still going to tower over anything, its many times higher than airplanes fly, its taller than most clouds, really it would be quite consistent with this render:

So, in conclusion, an earlier concept of the island of Mata Nui has it being 1/10 of the size of the final, and that size seems to work better with what we see in various media from the time, and works better with the story.

Personally this is what I'll be going with in terms of the scale of the island going forward, as it really fits with my vision of the setting and works well with all the story and media from that time.

¹-I don't care about someone saying a bio is 4.375966487787¾ feet, feet aren't real and neither are you. ²-Mt Ihu is NOT the highest point on the island, the GSR isn't Pinocchio with a big pointy nose, this has never been reflected in any visual media.

thank you for reading/have a nice day

Update: I have made a companion post with many renders of George visiting places on the island to hopefully better illustrate the scale.

[pluckyredhead]

…Sorry if this is a bit weird but do you have any queer romance book recommendations? I ended up finishing the last binding trilogy because you posted about it (you have excellent taste lol) and I’m a bit stuck at the moment with what to read next.

Not weird at all! I absolutely have recs! Also Freya Marske has a brand new book out called Swordcrossed if you want more of her writing. (For people who are not anon: The Last Binding is an Edwardian historical fantasy romance trilogy and it's excellent.)

Okay recs:

KJ Charles: My favorite queer romance author, hands down, and also the most prolific! She's written over 30 queer historical romance novels (and one queer historical mystery), mostly M/M, all historical and set in the UK during various time periods ranging from the 1810s to the 1920s. My two favorite things about her work: 1. It draws very heavily on the history, meaning that her characters never come across like modern people in historical cosplay. And 2. she's great at creating genuine conflict between or around characters. I have read too many romances where everything is uwu softness and nothing hurts but Charles's characters are always either fundamentally divided by politics, class, ethical perspectives, lies, and/or tragic backstories, OR they get along fine but a murderer is trying to kill them, OR, in the best of her books, both.

My favorites are probably The Will Darling Adventures (1920s trilogy all about the same couple fighting a criminal secret society), A Seditious Affair (1810s, a radical firebrand and a Tory government official accidentally fall in love while having extremely kinky sex), An Unnatural Vice (1870s, "spiritualist" con artist and the crusading journalist trying to expose him), and Any Old Diamonds (1890s, The Saddest Boy in the World hires a sexy jewel thief to rob his horrible father, kink ensues), but you can really start anywhere - Think of England is where I jumped on and it's nice because it's more of a standalone (there is a companion book but Think of England comes first). If you liked The Last Binding, you might want to start with her Magpie Lord series because they are also fantasy romance. (Freya Marske is a big KJ Charles fan and it shows, in a good way.)

Allie Therin: Sticking with the fantasy romance angle here for a moment, Therin has a 1920s trilogy called Magic in Manhattan that is all about the same couple, a prickly magic-user named Rory and the big hunky WWI vet who loves him, as they fight various evil magicians. (HUGE oversimplification but you get it.) There's a spinoff trilogy, the Roaring Twenties Magic series, which has two books out so far. I love NYC, the 1920s, fantasy, and queer romance, so obviously I love all of this.

But I'm particularly obsessed with her Sugar and Vice series (also a trilogy, first book is out already and the second one comes out next month) which is set in modern day Seattle and is about an empath named Reece and the super dangerous empath hunter called the Dead Man who may or may not be here to kill Reece, and also there's a serial killer on the loose. This one is a suuuuuuper slow burn (they don't even kiss in the first book!), so you have to be patient but I read the second book early and yeah I'm obsessed and desperate to talk to other people about these books.

Charlie Adhara: More paranormal romance! I wrote about these books at greater length recently, but the short version is: FBI agent gets transferred to the super secret werewolf division of the FBI and partnered with a hot werewolf, they fall in love, spend five books developing into The Ultimate Power Couple, I'm in love with their love. There's a spinoff series called Monster Hunt but only one book is out so far.

TJ Klune: I probably don't have to tell anyone about TJ Klune anymore and I'll admit he can be hit or miss for me but I did really love Wolfsong. As long as we're talking werewolves.

Dessa Lux: Okay these are more erotica than romance but Omega Required is a comfort read for me, which is funny because I'm not usually an omegaverse gal. But this is about a very sweet alpha doctor who offers a marriage of convenience to a very traumatized omega and it's literally just nonstop cuddling and soup. She also has a series that's just ever-growing werewolf gangbangs, if that's a thing you're into. Like. A cartoonish amount of werewolves at the gangbang. It's delightful.

Cat Sebastian: I will admit Sebastian is also a little bit hit or miss for me. I loved her very first trilogy, the Turner series, which is very much in the vein of KJ Charles (Regency romance, class divides, lots of conflict). She wrote some more 19th century stuff after that and then moved into mid-20th century romance (50s-70s) which is honestly very rare. She also basically...stopped writing any conflict at all. I would say a large portion of her books after the Turner series can be accurately described as "two best friends who are secretly in love with each other sit in the same house/apartment and enjoy each other's company until they get together." I know a BUNCH of people who absolutely love that and they are well-written! But I really have to be in the right mood for them.

Sarina Bowen and Elle Kennedy: Okay I am not a hockey person, but you must, you MUST read Him and its sequel, Us. Hockey-playing BFFs, one is gay and secretly in love with the the other, the other one is like "I don't think I'm into dudes but I'd better give you 300 blowjobs to make sure." (Spoiler: he's into dudes.) Honestly the stupidest men imaginable. I love them so much. Bowen has written a few other queer romances solo and I'm working my way through her back catalog now.

Rachel Reid: Yes it's more hockey romance but. BUT. Heated Rivalry. Two of the top players in the NHL, on rival teams, have famously hated each other for years...and have secretly been fucking since they were rookies. Reid is another one where I'm still working my way through her books but Heated Rivalry is something special.

I am SURE there are more I'm forgetting but this is long so I'll stop it here for now! Also folks should feel free to reblog with further recs, she said selfishly.

[writingforrhys]

cassian is so hunky

you've caught me at a wonderful time cause i'm in such a cassie mood

Blistering

cassian x reader contents: SO MUCH PINING and a good amount of suggestiveness

masterlist

It was hot. So, so hot.

Despite living in the definition of the North of Prythian, the heat was blistering. The summer heat was relentless for the most part, yet the sun beams reflecting off of the tall peaks of the mountains made it impossible to think straight.

At least that's what you were convincing yourself.

The condensation from your bottle of water dripped down your fingers as you stood rigid next to the training mat. Much to your chagrin, your family had decided the night before over a bottle of wine, obviously, that a collective early morning training session was long overdue.

Yes, you could admit, you always had fun with them. There wasn't anything in your life that could compare to spending time with your family and, on the rare occasion that you could catch them all in one space, you savoured their company. But right here, right now? As the sweat rolled down your brow and your clothes clung to every patch of skin it could, you wanted to be anywhere but this blistering roof.

Well, now with your gaze upon the General, you could admit that this was a blessing in disguise. He was magnificent.

His back muscles rippled gorgeously in the sun, his arms flexing to and fro as he sparred with Azriel. He was quick and nimble, despite his giant stature; he knew exactly what to do with himself, dodging Azriel's attacks expertly. Your stare focussed on the damp hair sticking to his neck, the half-up do he'd put together now coming apart and framing his beautiful, beautiful face.

Oh, how you wanted him. You'd wanted him for three centuries. He was undoubtedly the most handsome male you'd ever met, and he was kind too. So kind, so generous, so funny, and so hot.

Every touch from him set your body on fire. You savoured every laugh you could draw from him, or every time you shared a private glance across a room. It was your life's mission to make him smile, to have that deep vibrato ripple from his chest as he put his shiny canines on show.

You'd always been close. Connected. When you first met the Inner Circle, you were immediately drawn to him. He intimidated most with his height, build, and domineering demeanour; but not you. No, to you he was a spectacle. He was a steaming cup of tea on a winter's day; yet he was also the cold nipping at your nose when the snow had begun to fall.

He was balance, he was harmony.

"You okay there, dreamer?" A snicker.

"Oh, give her a break, Rhys. She can't help that she's hopelessly infatuated."

You broke your stare from Cassian's silhouette, your face now a flushed maroon, "The two of you are incorrigible."

Rhysand and Feyre chuckled amongst themselves, and then his arm wrapped delicately around her waist. You could only burn in jealously watching the movement; the only time Cassian's arms were around you that way was in your imagination, just before you were waking up with a warmth at your core.

"Do you ever work out up here or do you just stare pathetically at him?"

"Rhys!" Feyre's jaw dropped.

"What?" He released a hearty laugh, "It's been three hundred years of watching her pine, Feyre darling. You haven't run out of patience like I have."

You floundered for a response, mouth opening and closing, then settled on turning your back to them and filling your water bottle.

Then, finally, "He doesn't feel that way. It's easier to stare from a distance than embarrass myself horrifically."

You could almost hear Feyre's eyes soften behind you. She was far more sympathetic towards you than her mate, having held you on the many nights you'd cried over the male, that he'd never love you like you loved him.

"Well with the way he's staring holes into your ass right now, I'd have to disagree."

You'd never turned faster.

The High Lord was right, he was staring straight at your ass. Well, now he was dragging that look all the way up your body, gliding over your curves until he met you eye to eye. He didn't look away. A smirk planted on his lips as your stares connected and he shook his head fondly. You panicked as his legs began to wander to you as he unwrapped his fists.

You turned to find salvation in your friends, but found the both of them halfway out of the door already, Azriel hot on their heels. The only remaining comfort of their presence was the wink that Rhysand sent your way as they left.

"Hi, beautiful."

What?

"Are you alright, honey?"

You were quite alright. He was blocking out the sun with his body and the only thing you could see was his ridiculously sculpted torso in your immediate vision.

You blinked the shock out of your eyes, finally allowing your head to move and look at him.

"I'm, uh, I'm okay, Cassie. You good?" Nice one.

"I'm okay," He laughed, "I just can't help but notice how distracted you are this morning."

Gods, he was so sexy.

"Distracted? Me?" You giggled nervously, "Not a clue what you mean."

"No?" His hand reached to brush the hair away that had fallen in front of your face, his scent filling every air pocket around you as he leaned closer. Your legs had never clenched harder.

"Azriel's shadows couldn't help but report to him how absentminded you've been recently. It made him quite concerned." HIs brows had pulled together, but you saw the teasing look he was sparing you.

"That's just Az being a busybody. Guess he's got nothing to do."

He hummed.

He reached even further behind you, as if that were possible, and pulled back with his own water in hand. You knew he could hear the beating of your heart, the blood pumping around your body as if you'd run to Spring and back. The bastard was doing it on purpose.

"I'm sure. Although, I have been thinking..."

"Don't hurt yourself."

"I've been thinking," He scoffed, "That you can't seem to think straight lately. Actually, I did think that until I spoke to Mor, and she said you've never been more at the top of your game."

Fuck.

"...So, why is it that when you're with me, you're so ruffled?"

You didn't know what to say. You didn't know what to do. You'd been caught. Three hundred years of keeping this secret, and you'd fucked it up. This could very well be the end of your friendship with Cassian. He'd grow distant and he'd avoid you, not wanting to give you the wrong impression that you could ever be anything more. You'd have to move out, not able to face the humiliation of such a harsh rejection. You'd lose your life. You'd lose your family.

"There you go again. Disappearing." His hand came up to rest on your cheek, thumb grazing delicately along the blazing skin. His eyes seemed understanding, but you couldn't help imagining your worst fear coming to life.

"You shouldn't flatter yourself, Cassian. It's unbecoming."

"I've been flattering myself for centuries, my love; trying to convince myself that a bastard like me was good enough for a female like you."

You froze. Your eyes didn't stray from his. Was this really happening?

"Tell me to walk away. Tell me to step back and we'll never speak of this again." His face had nudged toward yours ever so slightly, a silent question hanging in the air.

"I can't," You panted, "Please don't."

The General didn't need another push. Your drinks clattered to the floor as his lips collided with yours in a fury, a long over-due cauldron finally boiling over. He was fast and forward, hands gliding from your face down your body and around your waist, grabbing everything they could. Your own hands gripped onto his arms desperately, doing anything to stop yourself from toppling over.

This was everything you'd ever dreamed of. No, it was better.

This was better than the scandalous books you'd read secretly in the library, imagining it was Cassian with his face between your thighs, rather than the hero. This was better than the nights you lay awake with nothing to do but stare at your ceiling as you fantasised about his eyes and his mouth and his hands. And it was only a kiss.

"Cassie," You murmured against his lips.

"Yeah?" He didn't relent.

"Take me to your room."

He pulled back, a wickedness in his features that sent ripples along your skin.

“You better savour your ability to speak. Once I’m done with you, it’ll be long gone.”

“You better savour your ability to speak, because once I’m done with you, it’ll be long gone.”

“You better savour your ability to speak. Once I’m done with you, it’ll be long gone.”

"You better savour your ability to speak, because once I'm done with you, it'll be long gone."

[hopemariposa]

My Random Ducktales Headcanons!!!

this is another post where… no one asked for this. but my past Ducktales post did good so I give the people what they want

(I crave the validation of others)

I also sprinkled in goofy screenshots for a little bit of extra seasoning

Dewey like… ate rocks as a kid. just for fun

Huey told Dewey that Dodos ate rocks and Dewey internalized this, thus, Huey is responsible for Dewey eating rocks

Donald had a panic attack when he saw his nephew (that he is a legal guardian for) wolf down like… three rocks at one time for the plot

Louie had a collection of various historical coins (they’re his special interest)

Donald regularly has nightmares about being attacked and killed by a bear (same bro)

Dewey taught Webby the words “rizz” “gyat” and “skibidi toilet” and it became everyone’s problem

this lead to Scrooge exclaiming that “he does not have any rizz” (this is a lie, he is rizz lord incarnate)

Mrs. Beakley is a Pintrest Board Mom™️

she also can’t cook. she just has an assortment of Pinterest recipes that everyone despises but eats so she doesn’t feel bad

Storkules has beaten up Andrew Tate. Mixed martial arts? more like mixed Greek salad served by a hunky demigod.

Storkules is also a feminist. that’s not a headcanon, tho, that’s a fact.

so is Launchpad. fight me on this.

Launchpad and Storkules are also besties. they’re both himbos with too much game.

Launchpad has illegally smuggled contraband into the country before. whether it was sniffle snacks or an exotic animal we’ll never know, but smuggling is on his transcript.

LP unironically uses the pet name “pookie”. he don’t know what it means but he heard Dewey said and Dewey’s his best friend so that makes it cool

he also has a five step hair care routine

Scrooge regularly pays off several press stations to write wack stories about him because they make him chortle.

Scrooge also uses the term “square”… in daily conversation

one time he called Mágica a “square” and it personally offended her for life, ripped open several wounds, and destroyed her emotional well-being for the rest of her days

Mrs. Beakley’s guilty pleasure is watching trash tv. Real Houseives? yes. Dance Moms? she quotes verbatim. The Bachelor? it’s her personality.

Mrs. Beakley watching these tv shows also got Della invested. now they throw a hissy fit if the other watches ahead of them

Webby cries over Bluey episodes on the daily.

Webby also related immensely to Bingo Heeler— it has awoken feelings in her she preferred to keep hidden

this is less of a headcanon, more of a fact, but Huey, Dewey and Webby (and more Im not thinking about) are so Neurodivergent it’s not even debatable

Della is a gym rat. she just is.

thats all thanks

[leafykat]

what drives me crazy is that like, there were no rumors about lord golden having any other lovers besides, APPARENTLY, tom badgerlock. so what happened was they all looked at this sexy twink and his hunky manservant and were like oh yeah theyre absolutely sleeping together and lord golden definitely tops. and afterward fitz is just roleplaying a normal heterosexual man but everyone was looking at him like god what secrets does he know about lord golden's golden cock (pheasant). for literally decades. guarantee that more than one person over the years got brave enough to try and find out more, but unfortunately one mention of lord golden and fitz goes into a thousand-yard stare while he contemplates how much the divorce still hurts. whoever it was is left thinking "damn it was that good, huh?" and the rumors get stronger. you can't beat those allegations fitz you can never beat those allegations

[uninformedartist]

Remember seeing way back when I was still in fandom a fan interpretation or rather design of mammon and love it to this day.

Design belongs to:

Like I want THIS mammon ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽ oh my goodness, the fans really out here making designs 10 times better than Viv, he's giving class, evil mobster, big chunky hunky energy like hmmmm amazing design.

Also found this old tweet of D*ni draws 🙄🙄🙄

I thank the good Lord every day for making me see the light of this infested fandom, really giving fatphobic vibes and Viv liked this tweet, tf. And saying the fandom will quote struggle, this fandom legit had to be prepared by Viv relesing mammon's design cos he's "plus sized" (again the mf aint plus sized). My soul what the actual fuck, this fandom and Viv is so allergic to seeing and Viv's case drawing another body type. Viv had to take a year to release the final design from the initial silhouette teaser, so used to seeing/drawing skinny twigs and slim thick this body type would send them, Viv especially this woman really has something again drawing plus sized characters, real plus sized characters.

Also shan't have disrespect on Clown from nightmare before Christmas 😤😤😤 the man is glorious.

[cassiefromhell]

Fluff nothing explicit between eris, lucien, and gn reader maybe hugs and cuddles in bed with both of them?

I hope you had a happy new year!

After Work

Lucien x Reader x Eris

wc: 1.2k, just a baby oneshot

warnings: in true cassie fashion, i made it a little depressing at first lol. slightly depressing thoughts, COMFORT, it gets better i promise.

a/n: and i'm back!! recs are open, next part of BAF is underway!

It’s been a long, long day.

You sigh, stepping in through the door and tossing your bag on a chair, running a hand over your face. You hang up your coat, numbly going through your typical post-work routine; take off the heels that have been hurting you all day, let your hair down from its suffocating bun, and sit down at the dining room table.

And for the second time this month and the billionth time these past two years, you drop a pink slip onto the tablecloth.

You whimper, letting your head fall to rest against the splendid tablecloth, probably another god damn Autumn Court bajillion dollar heirloom.

“Love?” Lucien’s familiar voice calls out from across your chambers in the palace, his footsteps approaching. His scent of cinnamon and fire floods your nose, followed by a sigh. “Oh, no. Not again.”

Lucien comes to stand by your side, and you don’t even lift your head, too busy wallowing in your failure. He lifts the pink slip, then sets it on fire. 

“I’m sorry, my love,” he murmurs, kneeling beside you. He rubs your back, pressing his face to your shoulder. “They’re idiots. All of them. We’ll tell Eris and he’ll—”

“Can we not? Tell Eris?” You interrupt, peering over at him. “I hate the face he makes when he finds out. Just this once. I’ll tell him when I secure a new job, I promise.”

This wasn’t the first time you were fired from a job, and you were sure it wasn’t the last. You never used to have problems holding a job — in fact, you were a star employee at your work in Velaris, and before that you had been living nothing short of a dream life with your dream job in the Winter Court. You loved what you did, and everyone loved you.

That was, until two years ago, when you had met Eris and Lucien and immediately discovered that they were your mates — your loves, your fated future and family. And you loved them. You did, and you still do… but there are side effects to being the mate of the High Lord of Autumn and his bastard brother that you had never even thought about.

Eris was not well liked in other courts, and since the news about Lucien being Helion’s scandalous son came out… well, it was a reputation that followed them everywhere.

In Autumn? Everything was hunky dory.

But in every other court, particularly the courts that offered your dream jobs? They scowled and batted away the two Vanserras.

Autumn was amazing in every way, but the open positions weren’t for you, and every time you found a job you really liked in another court? You lasted two weeks, maybe three until someone found out and ratted on you. The call into your boss’s office and the pink slip came not long after.

So, here you were, wallowing, and asking your mate to keep a secret.

Lucien sighs, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. “I’m not sure that’s a good idea, my love. He’ll find out eventually, and until then it’ll just be weighing on you.”

You frown, looking back to the tablecloth. “I just— I don’t want him, or you for that matter, to be worried about it. It’s my concern, and mine only.” You sniffle.

“That, my sweet, is not how mates work. Your concern is mine and Eris’s. Our concerns are yours. We’re a team. Come on,” he stands, sweeping you up out of the chair and into his arms. With a flick of his wrist, the kettle starts. “We’ll have some tea in bed. You can cry, or talk about it, or just lay there. But I will not have you wallowing on your own.”

You feel the exact moment that he told Eris through the bond, via the sudden change in emotions coming down the golden string that attached you to Eris. He goes from completely neutral to angry, and then suddenly sad. Sad for you. Sad because you weren’t fucking good enough to—

You start crying before you even get to bed, and Lucien just holds you tighter, stroking your hair. He lays down, pulling the covers over the both of you and laying you across his chest. 

“I know, I know,” he whispers, kissing the top of your head as your tears wet his shirt. “I’m here. It’ll be okay, I promise. Let’s get you sitting up and sipping some tea, okay? I think you’re dehydrated.”

A few moments later, his arm is around your waist and you’re sipping at a steaming cup of tea, curled up in his lap. He’s still stroking your hair, murmuring sweet nothings.

The door opens slowly, and Eris pokes his head in, still wearing his fancy royal clothing and crown. It took him much longer to get here than it usually does, but he’s here anyway.

“Hi,” Eris says softly, walking over and sitting on the bed in front of you. He reaches out and strokes your cheek, wiping away a few tears. “Again, huh?”

You sniffle and nod, holding your tea a little tighter. Lucien looks a little concerned for the health of the teacup in your hands. 

Eris tosses his crown aside and crawls over to be sitting beside you. Lucien reluctantly lets him pull you into his own lap as you sip at your tea once more — which has now gone cold.

“I have something for you. Do you want it now, or later?” Eris kisses your temple, then down your cheek, stopping with a little peck on the side of your mouth. “Hmm?”

The last thing you want is some new piece of jewelry to remind you that your mates are a million times better than you are, but you shrug anyway. “Now, I suppose,” you answer with a  hoarse voice, clearing your throat. 

Eris reaches into his pocket, and covers your eyes. “Hold out your hands.”

You do so, and then there’s a jingle, the smell of metal, and something falls into your hands. Your eyes are uncovered, and you find… a key ring in your hand, with two brass keys.

You blink, and then blink again. “What?”

Lucien grins softly, taking your chin between his thumb and forefinger and tilting your head up to look at him. He must be in on this. “They’re the keys to your business, of course. On Maple street, a few blocks away from the palace. The building you’ve always said is pretty. It’s yours.”

Your eyes are watering again, but for an entirely different reason. “What… no— no, you didn’t.”

“We did,” Eris says, running a hand through your hair. “If you want a building in a different court, we can always—“

“No,” you bite your lip, fighting a grin. “It’s perfect. It’s so, so perfect. But— it must have been expensive—”

“Don’t wanna hear it,” Lucien shakes his head. 

You wrap your arms around Lucien’s neck, kissing him, and then do the same for Eris, speaking the whole time; “Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!” You squeal, practically vibrating with excitement.

“You wanna go see—”

You’re up and out of bed before Lucien even finishes his sentence, running towards the door.

“Shoes! And a coat!” Eris calls after you. 

Of course you had forgotten those things. Because you were too excited.

You were ready for your fresh start, mates by your side.

[espinosaurusrexex]

Hey girl! Hope you are doing good and also love all your work 🥰 for the bingo card could you please do ari levinson with touch starved? Like imagine where he was just this grumpy man w everyone else but when u got him alone oh my lord that beefy man was just in need of some love 🥺🥺🥺🥺

thank you so much that is so sweet of you to sayyy 🥰💗 this got a little steamy towards the end... sorry not sorry

Touch Starved (Bingo Game)

!BINGO ASKS CLOSED!

Hunky(he’s always hunky but still)!Ari x Reader because I can

word count: 1k

warnings: grumpy!Ari (but not to you he's very sweet), fluff, a lot of touching (obviously), allusions to smut

It wasn’t easy being with Ari Levinson. At least that’s what everyone thought. He was grumpy and mean 90% of the time. He didn’t like being around people, and he despised seeing couples do PDA in front of him. How could they? The audacity...

And everyone avoided tempting him because of how intimidating he could be.

But it was simple, really. Ari just needed to be loved. He needed to be touched, more specifically. He just didn’t know it. You hadn’t either. You had just always been a very affectionate person: hugging people, kneading shoulders, playing with fingers, ruffling and braiding hair, and tracing skin. It was a habit, one that you pursued with everyone around you - including Ari. 

And when you first laid your hands on him, he senses something magical in your touch. Everyone around you had gone quiet when your arms landed around Ari’s broad shoulders. They had been sure you would be signed off this friend group faster than Rachel had introduced you. But while everyone was holding their breath, waiting for Ari to explode in front of them, you just felt his arms reach around you and squeeze you tight. 

“It’s nice to meet you, dove.” He’d said with a voice so silky you melted into his chest. 

Everyone was surprised. There was no yelling, no gruff looks or growling, no angry storming out and no eye rolls. Ari was smiling over your shoulder before his nose buried in the smell of your hair, his touch lingering with a gentle kiss on your cheek that day. 

Rachel had talked to you about it as soon as she noticed the change in her friend. But you never knew what she was talking about. Whenever you were around, Ari was the sweetest most relaxed person in the room. You thought he let you play with his hair, and trace his arms because that was who he was. But little did you know that it was because of your touch, he would become that way.

“It’s as if he’s switching bodies when he’s with you. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him smile like that.” Rachel huffed in her cocktail as you replied to Ari’s wave across the room with a smile. “I don’t know...” You turned back to her. “Maybe he just likes me better.”

Rachel wouldn’t complain. It was nice seeing her scary friend let the frown fall for once. So, who was she to risk a comeback of hunky grumpy when the soft Ari was a thousand times more fun?

Ari hadn’t noticed it at first. It immediately seemed natural to act like this around you. He questioned the weird looks Sammy and Kabede had given him, but he didn’t change a thing. At every gathering, he sought out your touch, proximity - something that could bring him that oddly satisfying feeling deep within he’d only experienced seldom before. And he found himself disappointed when Rachel announced that you weren’t coming that day. 

He was like a programmed machine. When you weren’t there, Ari was his grumpy old self. But with you, he acted as if he’d sprung right out of a romance novel. And it was confusing for everyone else. 

But Ari and you didn’t notice it. It was natural, felt like a habit as soon as you had introduced him to it. Just like his drop-ins at your home whenever you couldn’t make it to a group hangout because of work or something else. 

The two of you would spend the evening lounging on your couch or bed, often talking deep into the night with each other’s hands buried beneath sweaters and strands of hair. You liked how responsive he was to your little habit of touching people, and Ari enjoyed the way his body eased around your affection. 

You were like a drug to him. The only provider of a feeling he was addicted to; and the fact you let him have it for something so little, a response that felt innate to him, fueled his need for your body close to his. 

“Your hair is so soft,” you’d often whisper into the darkness when your fingers scratched his scalp, another hand tracing the veins on his bicep as you lay in bed together. “I wonder how it would braid.”

And Ari would respond to your spoken thoughts with an encouraging “Why don’t you try?” and a smile so big, it hurt his face. 

You’d sit behind him on the sofa that night. Ari comfortably planted on the ground, engulfed by your thighs as he hoped your fingers in his hair would never stop working. His hands would knead your legs, big arms wrapping around whatever he could reach as he felt his heartbeat settle in a steady and calm rhythm. 

“Pretty as a prince!” You kissed to his cheek and Ari was fast to hold your face in place.

“Did you just call me pretty, dove?”

“I’m sorry, do you not like to be called pretty, boy?”

“I’d much rather be called your pretty boy.”

“That could be arranged.”

Ari grinned when he smashed his lips to yours, pulling on your arm until you shuffled around him to straddle him on the ground, hands roaming beneath his shirt, tracing his tanned abs and pulling moan after moan from his plump lips. 

“I wanna touch you,” he mumbled between breaths.

“You already are,” you breathed.

“More,” he growled, “I wanna touch you more. Need to.” His last sentence got lost in the trail of wet warm kisses he left on your neck.

A tender moan escaped your breath when your legs locked behind his back. “Then what are you waiting for?” And then Ari got up with you, his hands struggling to stay on your ass for support, as he carried you to the bedroom.

Comments and reblogs help writers out a lot! Please don't hesitate to tell me what you thought 🥰

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[wulfhalls]

thank you so much for putting kastle on my dash in the year of our lord 2023. they just don't make 'em like that anymore...they put crack in that ship fr. now I'm off to rewatch that moment in that elevator where they touch foreheads and he looks at her like if the world was on fire she's the one thing he would grab to take with him. and she looked at him the same way. absolutely crazy.

chemistry this good happening to a show this bad is straight up criminal. like be serious be for real. and I even get that u can't restructure ur superhero show about catholic guilt boy around hotsexi hunky jon berenthal with trauma and his ex girlfriend falling in love I do. but then they give hotsexi hunky jon berenthal with trauma his own damn show and then proceed not to make it about him and daredevils ex girlfriend falling in love???????? straight up humiliating for everyone in that production team. like grow up 🙄🙄

[the-way-astray]

Hi! This is the meta anon here (as I'll take to calling myself). I have read your response to the meta and I agree that Keefe doesn't actually do things like apologizing or self-reflection without external consequences to motivate him. This was a regrettable oversight on my part since I confess that I don't spend many hours of my KOTLC fandom exploits specifically loving or hating Keefe.

HOWEVER, I do believe that your hatred could set him on the path to self-reflection. My justification is that he doesn't particularly enjoy being hated. He will try to make you fall in love with him. You'll keep on hating him. Somewhere along the way he may have a good long think about himself because of the consequences.

Justification for the justification: Keefe despises being hated. He (obviously) isn't comfortable being hated by his parents even though he works to make him hate them because they're despicable people to varying but undeniable degrees. There's still a 'popular boy' who's actually a friendless (except for Fitz) kid who feels like he needs to keep up the humor and his trademark smirking (and so forth) to make people like him. The idea that someone hates him so vehemently may even make him take it as a side-project-challenge to make you like him. Cue the self-reflection.

Allow me to explain with a fic (sadly no strieefe for the strieefe enjoyers but. gen). Inspired by Alayda and the Never Change anon. Sincere apologies for probably mischaracterizing you (and Katie).

*

hate your lover, love your hater, and be studied by her friend: pt.1

When on a pleasant Friday evening in September Stria received a message from an unknown number, she blocked the number, posted some fascinating thoughts about Aldella on her Tumblr blog, and then proceeded to go to sleep.

The next morning, she had another message on her phone. In her half-asleep daze she opened the message and read the following:

Hey!! This is Keefe 'Lord Hunky-hair' [last name redacted for annoying-daddy-dearest reasons]. I saw that you blocked my human number yesterday, which was a little mean of you, so I had a Technopath friend of mine unblock it on your phone. It was brought to my attention that you put a lot of effort into hating my guts. Could we maybe fix that up and become friends?

Stria almost deleted the message. But then she saw that the number it was from had been the same number as last night.

Keefe Sencen. The real Keefe Sencen? she thought. Can't be. But she was, after all, the person who had written a seventy-five-page anti Keefe rant essay. She could easily convince an anonymous prankster into hating Keefe right along with her. Even if they had friends who were terrifyingly good at manipulating technology.

Let's play at this game, she decided, and typed: Sure. If you're actually Keefe Sencen, meet me at 12:30pm today, my time zone, at the main entrance of this mall. She dropped a link to a mall reasonably far from her house (which had, by all accounts, a reasonably efficient security team), and then called her good friend Katie to bring some backup with her. She didn't want to take chances with a fun joke turning into a terrible kidnap plot.

'You know it could be the real Keefe, right?' Katie pointed out to her. 'It's not completely impossible.'

Stria told her that it was most certainly not possible enough, and proceeded to pack her bags with necessary weapons (things to throw and a nice stout stick) before setting off.

She arrived at the mall at 12:20pm. Katie arrived at 12:30pm. 'Keefe' arrived, fashionably late, at 12:45pm. Not by car, but by what appeared to be light-leaping.

And it also appeared that the person was Keefe, mussed hair and smirk and all. Or at least this was someone in an incredibly convincing Keefe Sencen cosplay.

'Ohhh,' gasped Katie. 'It IS him! Are you Keefe Sencen? Oh, I can't believe it's you, and I love you so much! I want to examine you under a little microscope! Have I ever told you that I wanted to study you?'

He blinked. 'You're not the hater?'

Katie pointed to Stria, who was sitting on the steps of the mall in full view of the public, staring into the middle distance and trying to wrap her head around the fact that based on what she had just seen, both the Lost Cities and Keefe Sencen were real.

She was going to track Shannon Messenger down and have some strong words with her.

But questioning human existence could come later. For now, she simply stood up and looked Keefe straight in his hex-code-ice-blue eyes.

'It's me,' Stria said. 'I'm the hater.'

Then she pulled out a photocopied and spiral-bound version of her seventy-five-page rant on why she hated Keefe, and slapped it into Keefe's chest. It made an incredibly satisfying thunk. 'If you want to know why I hate you, then read this, and never talk to me again. Or if you do, you'd better have read this entire document.' And with that, she turned on her heel and stormed off.

Katie spent an extra five minutes getting Keefe's number, so as to have better access to him and his fascinating 'himselfness', and then followed Stria home.

*

Pt.2 on request; you are welcome to take stabs at my identity but kindly don't take stabs at me because I am small, frail, and weak <3

context here

wahoo!!!! i converted someone. everybody clap and cheer.

i think if i continued to hate keefe, it would not set him on a path of self-reflection, because he wouldn't care enough about my opinion to try to change his ways. heck, he cares about sophie, and he's not even trying to really change for her. he just says whatever he needs to say to appease her, then carries on. so what's going to motivate him to change himself for me, someone who doesn't even like him in the slightest? i would say he's generally indifferent to being hated, unless the person hating him is sophie. think about tam. he doesn't make any effort to try to make tam like him, though he generally knows tam doesn't really like him that much. so there's that.

i don't think keefe does any of that to make people like him . . . it's more of a cover for what's going on at home. everyone falls into the sense of "keefe is this cool, popular kid", and that's all they see of him, so why would they bother trying to think about what his home life must be like? i genuinely don't think keefe cares about being liked. he cares about attention, which is not the same thing. but i doubt he cares whether people like him or not. i think keefe would maybe, at the most, try to try to talk to me to figure out what my problem is with him. it might intrigue him that far. but once he realizes how far my hatred of him goes, i doubt he'd want to interact with me much anymore. and the feeling would certainly be mutual.

alright notes on your fic:

"hate your lover, love your hater, and be studied by her friend" first part is me i guess, second part is keefe i think, and third part is katie????

"[ . . . ] posted some fascinating thoughts about Aldella on her Tumblr blog, and then proceeded to go to sleep." ooooh, you think my thoughts about aldella are fascinating? thank you so much, anon. very much appreciated.

"Hey!! This is Keefe 'Lord Hunky-hair' [last name redacted for annoying-daddy-dearest reasons]. I saw that you blocked my human number yesterday, which was a little mean of you, so I had a Technopath friend of mine unblock it on your phone. It was brought to my attention that you put a lot of effort into hating my guts. Could we maybe fix that up and become friends?" and then stria died. the end. just kidding.

wondering how the fuck keefe knows i hate him. all these fics just have him like. somehow mysterious know that i hate him. did the power of my hatred magically implant that information into his head?

"She could easily convince an anonymous prankster into hating Keefe right along with her." terrifying accurate representation of my thought process. good job, anon.

"[ . . . ] then called her good friend Katie to bring some backup with her. She didn't want to take chances with a fun joke turning into a terrible kidnap plot." i love how i'm convinced that one extra teenage girl will stop a kidnapping plot if it happens. this is hysterical.

"'You know it could be the real Keefe, right?' Katie pointed out to her. 'It's not completely impossible.' Stria told her that it was most certainly not possible enough, and proceeded to pack her bags with necessary weapons (things to throw and a nice stout stick) before setting off." ah, katie. unfortunately, it is completely impossib- *gets shot* also me packing weapons . . . goodbye.

"Or at least this was someone in an incredibly convincing Keefe Sencen cosplay." not the keefe cosplay . . .

"'Ohhh,' gasped Katie. 'It IS him! Are you Keefe Sencen? Oh, I can't believe it's you, and I love you so much! I want to examine you under a little microscope! Have I ever told you that I wanted to study you?'" what do you mean. this is literally such an accurate katie. anon, you've crawled inside her head (/j katie don't kill me).

"He blinked. 'You're not the hater?'" I'M DEAD IN A DITCH.

"Katie pointed to Stria, who was sitting on the steps of the mall in full view of the public, staring into the middle distance and trying to wrap her head around the fact that based on what she had just seen, both the Lost Cities and Keefe Sencen were real." and then she shrugged and started tearing him (verbally) to shreds. keefe then fainted. stria had to then bury him in a ditch while katie verbally dissecting him. placing a good amount of dirt on him in case he woke up, she made katie swear not to come back and dig him up. katie, predictably, did not listen.

"She was going to track Shannon Messenger down and have some strong words with her." fun fact: i've never met shannon.

"For now, she simply stood up and looked Keefe straight in his hex-code-ice-blue eyes." NOT THE HEX CODE ICE BLUE EYES.

"Then she pulled out a photocopied and spiral-bound version of her seventy-five-page rant on why she hated Keefe, and slapped it into Keefe's chest. It made an incredibly satisfying thunk. 'If you want to know why I hate you, then read this, and never talk to me again. Or if you do, you'd better have read this entire document.' And with that, she turned on her heel and stormed off." *sniffs* anon has me down so well . . . this is what i say to people who wanna pick a fight with me over my keefe opinions. also what did i tell you all about the trope of me having a fucking. physical copy of my rant. which i apparently carry around and can afford to just toss at keefe.

"Katie spent an extra five minutes getting Keefe's number, so as to have better access to him and his fascinating 'himselfness', and then followed Stria home." you have katie locked down. to a science, maybe even.

i'm roughly 92% sure you're @worldsunlikemyown but if you're not this is going to be so embarrassing. part two would be interesting . . .

@myfairkatiecat come look at this anon's interpretation of you

[slaymybreathaway]

YOU'VE REALLY GOT A HOLD ON ME

♡Chapter Nine♡

Masterlist Outsiders Chapter List

Word Count: 2k

Content: sexual references, cursing

1963 ♡ Will Rodgers High School

♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡

As Gracie closed her locker before first period the following Monday morning, she was met with the excited face of her best friend. "Tell me everything!" Sally squealed, buzzing with excitement.

"Good lord, you almost gave me a heart attack" Gracie exhaled, her hand on her chest out of frighten. The day before, she had called Sally to tell her that Darry finally asked her to the prom. Before she was able to get into all of the details, her parents came home and she had to hang up.

"Good! I have been dealing with all this anticipation since yesterday and it's killing me!" Sally spoke, in a dramatic tone, like she was genuinely about to drop dead at any moment.

"Alright alright, calm down... what do you wanna know?" Gracie shrugged, hanging the strap of her camera around her neck. The pair began to walk down the bustling school hallway, shoulder-to-shoulder.

"What happened! Right from the start, don't leave out any details," Sally warned, her finger pointing at her best friend in a joking threat.

Gracie took a deep breath in and out, feeling her lungs inflate and deflate before she spoke. "I was pretty drunk after the beer-blast Friday night, so Darry took me home and I stayed in his because I didn't want my parents to get all hot and bothered," she started.

"Ooh, you stayed in his?" Her friend wiggled her eyebrows, suggestively.

"Yes. The same way I've been staying at his since I was 8. Get your mind outta the gutter!" Gracie rolled her eyes.

"Anyways- the next mornin', he made breakfast and we were talking about what had happened the night before, because I'd be dammed if I could remember a thing" she let out a laugh.

"Girl me too," Sally giggled "I woke up in my bathtub- sorry, I just interupted you, go on!"

"He told me that when I was drunk, I was getting mad because he had asked Shelly to the prom. So I apologised and told him that was gonna have a great time with her. But he told me that he had never even asked her to go with him, she had made that up to make Paul Holden jealous,"

A look of shock crossed Sally's face, which turned into a wide, shit-eating grin. "No way! Oh god, I knew he'd never ask out a socy-too-good-bitch like her! So what happened after?"

Gracie smiled at her friend's enthusiasm. "He said that he was planning on asking someone else to prom, me of course, but I didn't really catch that drift. So I asked him who it was and he got a bit frustrated because he didn't know how to tell me that he was talking about me.

I got defensive then and tried to storm out, and then he just... asked me,"

It took a moment for all the information to sink in before Sally started giggling like a child. "I don't really know what else I was expecting from you and Darry Curtis. It makes so much sense, though. You're both very.... stubborn," she chose her last word carefully.

"Hey!" Gracie bumped shoulders with her playfully. "But yeah it was really nice... it's just-" she sighed, looking down at her feet.

Sally scanned over her friends face as she spoke "oh no girl, 'it's just' what?". She knew Gracie all too well and this tone of voice worried her.

"It's just that now I'm so confused! Did he ask me to prom like romantically or as his best friend? You know that I've had a crush on him since junior high and I've been able to deal with it because I knew that he only saw me as a friend but now... I don't know!" She shrugged her shoulders.

Sally shrugged. "I guess you'll have to just figure it out then... don't stress yourself over it, alright? It's a school dance, at least try to have fun," she nodded. "And besides- at least you'll get to dance up real close to Mr. Hunky-captain-of-the-football -team,"

Her friend's last statement made Gracie giggle, pulling her out of her thoughts. "Yeah, he really is a stud isn't he?" she smiled, dreamingly

"Who really is a stud?" a deep voice spoke from behind the two girls, making them both turn on their heels. They looked up to see the shit-eating grin of a certain Darry Curtis who knew that they

were talking about him.

Sally scoffed, throwing her eyes up to the ceiling "Wouldn't you like to know, Curtis?"

She then turned to her friend. "If I'm late for AP lit again, Mr. Symes will put me in detention... catch ya later?" Sally smiled before walking away, leaving the other two stood there in silence.

Gracie raised her head, looking up at Darry's face. She held her books close to her chest. "Hey" she spoke.

"Hi," Darry stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He looked around, making sure that no teachers were in earshot before speaking again. "How set are you on going to class?"

Gracie was suprised by this statment, she had never known Darry as the type to skip school. "Not set at all, I didn't do the calculus homework," she chuckled, honestly.

The boy threw his head back in laughter at her lack of hesitation. "Alright c'mon then, milkshakes on me," he nodded his head towards the door.

Gracie smiled, walking near him as they exited the school "A large milkshake?" She asked, raising her eyebrows.

Darry rolled his eyes with a sarcastic smile. "Can't believe you just asked me

that," he muttered, as if a small milkshake was even an option.

Gracie knocked her shoulder onto his, both of them bursting into laugher as they slid into opposite sides of Darry's truck.

♡

"Alright- here's the strawberry shake," a young waitress with dark red curls placed a glass filled with light pink liquid, whipped cream and a cherry on top infront of Gracie. "And... here's the chocolate," she repeated the action, placing a drink infront of Darry.

"Thank you," Gracie smiled, knocking the waitress out of her prolonged gaze at Darry, who hadn't noticed and was putting a straw through the whipped cream atop of his milkshake.

The waitress returned the smile, her face growing red at the thought of getting caught staring at someone's boyfriend, before returning back into the kitchen.

Gracie giggled shaking her head, putting her own straw into her milshake. This caught Darry's attention, as he looked at the girl from the opposite side of the table. "What're you gigglin' about?"

"The waitress was just about picturing you doing her over this table," she spoke teasingly.

Her vulgar choice of words made Darry choke on his milkshake, his face turning as red as the cherry in his glass. "-excuse me?" He stuttered out eventually.

Gracie giggled at his shocked expression, a bit suprised at her own lack of filter. "C'mon, she was practically undressing you with her eyes... you really didn't notice?" She asked, putting her elbows on the table.

"No... I couldn't even tell you what she looked like," he admitted, shrugging his shoulders.

This made Gracie smile once more, shaking her head as she took a sip from her milkshake. If she had really thought about it, Darry never did seem to take an interest in very many girls at school... none at all, really. It wasn't from lack of interest either, if Gracie had a dime for every time she overheard girls talking about the things they'd let Darry to do to them, she'd be a millionare.

As she thought about the girls in school, another thought crossed her mind. "Wouldn't your coach kill ya if he found out you were skippin?" she asked, tilting her head to the side. "Or doin' anythin to lower your chances at that scholarship you've been working for?"

At the mention of the scholarship, Darry winced as if someone had held a lit cigarette to the back of his hand. "I don't have to worry about that anymore,"

"What- Darry what do you mean? You're the best football player I've ever seen, and you're smart too! I don't see why they wouldn't-" she started, only to be cut off mid-rant.

"They did... I got the scholarship Gracie" he clarified, looking into her eyes with a lost expression. "Well, I got a scholarship anyways,"

Gracie's eyes danced over the table infront of her, blinking as she figured out what he was trying to say. "It wasn't enough was it?"

Darry exhaled deeply, shaking his head and slumping his shoulders "Even with the money I've saved from working the DX at weekends, I'm nowhere even close,"

Looking at his defeated expression, Gracie slid out of her side of the booth and slid into his side, sitting close enough so that her their shoulders were touching. "I'm guessing you haven't told your folks then," she spoke after a few moments of silence.

Darry sighed, staring blankly infront of him. "No, they'd want me to go anyways, even if it meant they had to take out a loan. I can't let them do that Gracie, I can't let them go bankrupt because of me," he ran a hand through his hair.

Gracie watched as his hand glided through his hair. Darry wore his hair tightly cropped, like his dad did, and lightly waxed. He didn't wear it long and greasy like his brother Sodapop did, but he didn't quite wear it like is soc friends did either. It was a hidden symbol of his place in society: respected enough by socs to not be considered a greaser yet too poor to ever fully be cosidered a soc.

It was then that Gracie realised that Darry needed her right now. Any of his other friends would never understand what it feels like to be stuck for money.

Not knowing what she could say to make him feel better, she hooked her arm into his and rested her head on his shoulder.

The feeling of her touch was incredibly comforting to Darry. He turned to her, resting his forehead into the side of her head. "I don't know what I'm gonna do, Gracie," he mumbled, softly.

"You'll get through it, like you always do," she sighed, patting his arm. They both lifted their heads, looking at eachother. An idea crossed through Gracies mind, which then came out of her mouth before she could even finish thinking it.

"I mean, maybe you can discuss with your coach and the college scout about starting next year instead? Then you could work full time for a year and make the money you need" she spoke, glancing up at Darry.

He thought it through in his mind for a moment. "You think it could work?" He asked, genuinely.

Gracie shrugged. "You have to try... you deserve to have a good life, you deserve to get out of here and make something of yourself Darry," she spoke once more, looking into his eyes to make sure he knew that she meant every word.

He nodded. "You do too, Gracie. You deserve it more than anyone I know. You deserve something better than just working till you die like everyone else around here,"

"Yeah well..." she exhaled, an unhopeful expression on her face. "Who knows? Maybe I can be your personal photographer when you make it to the big leagues," she spoke, making Darry laugh at the idea of him going pro.

Gracie took the camera that hung around her neck and snapped a quick photo of Darry smiling widely. "I always get the best pictures of you," she mumbled.

"Of course you do," Darry nudged her with his shoulder. "Because you think I'm such a 'stud'" he spoke with an air of joking cockiness.

Gracie's mouth hung open like a codfish. "Oh shut up," she rolled her eyes, grabbing her milkshake from across the table and took a sip. "I will throw this over you," she threatened, hearing Darry's loud laughs echo across the diner.

♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡◇♡

Taglist (comment to be added): @kaytheday @american-idiot-jpg @curtis-corner @casey1-2007

[tornrose24]

GREETINGS, NERDS! IT'S YOUR BOY, BILL CIPHER! I HAVE POSSESSED THE BODY OF TORNROSE24 FOR THIS POST IN REGARDS TO MY ROLE IN THAT DISNEY CHANNEL THEMED RESIDENT EVIL VILLAGE AU!

So you likely saw those drawings of that Resident Evil Village Au (hilarious, I know) and are wondering ‘but I want to know more about Bill. Why is his human form some old dude that wouldn’t be useable for a Tumblr sexyman contest? WHERE’S MORE INFORMATION ABOUT BILL AND HOW DID HE TAKE OVER THE PINES?! AND HOW IS HE COMPARABLE TO EVELINE WHEN HE IS FAR SUPERIOR?!’ Well worry not, nerds, for I shall tell you MY side of things:

MY TIME IN THE VILLAGE:

-See, I grew up in that dumb village. The so called ‘Father Belos’ implanted a cadou at me at a young age. I was a massive success, of course, and he decided to make me part of his so-called ‘family.’ As for my real, biological family? Well… the less you know the better. Other than that their remains are somewhere in the surrounding woods.

–FYI, his REAL name is Philip and his big goal is trying to get his big bro back. He already tried the cloning gig and it didn’t work. And he thought he could use MY body to get Caleb back?! Ha! Fat chance, dingus!

-So I was given power and prestige for a time. I had my own lab where I inserted cadou into SEVERAL people and got a few henchmen out of the deal. Meanwhile, I had fun screwing with everyone’s minds and visiting them in their dreams thanks to some good old mental astral projection and what not. (And helping to get rid of anyone unwanted…. Fun times!)

-Those four other lords? They’re losers. I can’t believe they are meant to be my ‘siblings’ as ‘Father’ puts it.

-Oh, but I’ve visited their minds and know their fears! One has nightmares about losing her hunky husband and baby girl. One has nightmares about ‘what could have been,’ being alone, and having guilt issues. One is worried she’ll lose control of her mutation and kill everyone. The other… eh, just typical ‘always rejected by my family’ and weirdly about platypuses for some reason. (That’s the one I go to the most when I want to be amused).

-Ah yes, their heirs… my ‘nieces.’ My personal favorite is Meteora–what an adorable little hellspawn! She tried biting me several times and it’s a ticklish kind of painful! Also she’s already making the best demonic faces and crawling up walls! I hope for the best for her!

–I decided to be funny and visit the girls’ nightmares. Metora is a baby, so there’s not much in her little brain, besides worrying about getting separated from her parents. The others though? One is worried about causing pain to her family and friends and blames herself for it. Another is afraid that Belos is going to find out about ‘the big plan’ (which I won’t spoil, of course). The last one just wants a normal life.

-So I wasn’t too keen on being an underling and tried to take over the village with MY underlings. Unfortunately, the other lords managed to turn on me, my henchmen were dead, and **** brains decided to punish me. He couldn’t kill me himself, so he injected something that would make me age faster than that decaying apple you refused to eat as a kid, instead of aging slowly like the others. (Oh, I wonder if Belos told the two losers who adopted the girls who got injected with cadou that they might age slowly like they will? They will be so PISSED considering those girls still have their biological families around. I think it’s HILARIOUS! Or I don’t know, maybe they aren’t aging slowly. Getting a cadou is the dumbest lottery scam ever.)

–And how did ‘Daddy’ get rid of me? Well Fordsy was visiting the village and I managed to sweet-talk him into taking me home with him. Belos was all too glad to be rid of me.

–What? Was there anything between me and Ford? MIND YOUR DAMN BUSINESS! I’m not telling you anything!

MY TIME WITH THE PINES–

-What a dumbass! Ford took me to his house while his family was there! So I quickly got most of them under my control with the exception of his brother and great-nephew. (Eh, it was easy–I just used a little infection on them). Stan managed to get Dipper away, but little did he know that I infected the boy with something.

–See, as much as I enjoyed having my own ‘family’ I needed to ditch my rapidly aging husk and get a new one. Dipper was initially my best candidate, but I had the others trick several young men and boys into getting to the house so I can infect them and get my new body. Unfortunately, all the bastards died–they weren’t compatible. Meanwhile, I was using my favorite projection as a disguise–a certain triangle form that you all love and want to kiss (you disgusting freaks! I know you love me, but I don’t want EVERYONE’S SALIVA all over me at the same time! One at a time, please!)

–So Dipper realized what was happening to him and–wanting to get his family back–snuck onto the grounds. It was around this time that Heart-Cheeks and her friend, Beauty Mark were tricked into coming to the Pines residence. (I think they were on a summer vacation). I had the Pines snatch Beauty Mark away and they helped me infect him while I left Heart-Cheeks at their mercy.

–Speaking of which, would Mabel count as my ‘daughter?’ I’m sure my nieces would have loved her. Especially that really preppy-happy one.

-Knowing my time was short, I sped up the infection in Dipper and I did it a little too fast because he was starting to crystalize while trying to help Heart-Cheeks. I had better success with Beauty Mark.

–Unfortunately that ASSHOLE Stan eventually came to save his family and teamed up with Heart-Cheeks. Also, Dipper managed to make a serum that Heart-Cheeks used against me and cut off my ability to create illusions and get in people’s head. I. WAS. PISSED!

–Well, the joke’s on her. I left that infection in Beauty Mark, but changed it up a bit. Let’s just say that if Belos knew what it was that I put into the boy, he would immediately get the kid and use him for his ultimate scheme.

-Unfortunately, I DIED. Calcified into dust when Heart-Cheeks smashed me to bits, with some help from some military-looking people. And yes–Stan dealt the final blow. Asshole.

-And I’m now stuck in the Megamycete’s consciousness/realm/whatever you want to call it thanks to the connection some of us share with it. The only way I can have any fun is to give those losers nightmares. Last I heard, the Pines family was freed from my control, Dipper's body went back to normal, and all my victims managed to escape... WHAT KIND OF–?! I wanted violence and trauma, damnit!

-Ah well. Heart-Cheeks will have to deal with Belos and my four ‘siblings’ soon enough.

–Well, looks like my connection is failing and I’ll lose control of this idiot’s body soon. Hope you had fun reading this, because I’m thinking of possessing YOU next. Also, tell your Mom I said hi–I hope you took that DNA test like my canon self suggested.

[someoneshitinmysoup]

follow up thoughts to a rlly cute aph and garroth post i saw (by @dearestlilo so good check it out), which made me be like :<<< aw

which usually doesn’t happen to me as an laurmau truther BUT

i rlly do feel like every ship is valid (im a bit of an aaron hater i’ll b so honest but that’s seperate) but they all exist in different universes

i feel my favorite changed throughout time, as in season one if she just fell for garroth and never really got close with laurance that woudl be a beautiful thing. like a unknowing new lord and her loyal guard who starts protecting her because of duty but ends up doing it for love

but then she meets laurence and they adventure together and become so much closer because of garroth being trapped in the irene dimension and i rlly feel like she felt those feelings for him then someone who was a guard and left his duties (most sacred thing for guards) to follow her and ends up being a guard again but because he loves her first

and even garrance could be so real in the way laurance stuck to them after meeting garroth once and wanted him out of irene as much as aph did (at first- then she starts his CHARACTER DEFAMATION ARC which is NOT HIM covered in another post i made but ANYWAYS)

but then as mentioned laurance begins to be a dickhead and well shit if my basically bf was acting the way he was i’d prolly go off with some hunky stranger too

but these are all like different universes bc if she actually made the decision to put her self insert (never getting over that) with someone it would change the whole story and make it so they can’t coexist

unless they’re all in a polycule or sum but thatsnot my area of expertise lmfaoo