#GOD I love this story sm I could talk about it forever

[kuwupikaa]

As much as I think Gankutsuou is an amazing Monte Cristo adaptation, I think Villefort couldve been done a lot better. I just finished reading an abridged version of the book today, and it made me really emotional how much that man actually loved his family. Yeah he didnt have the best relationship with his father, but still kept him around and made sure he was cared for when he got paralyzed. It didnt really come to my attention earlier, but at the end of the book, with all the poisoning going on, that poor man went through so much. First his father in law, then his mother in law, one of the most loyal servants, his daughter and then his son and wife.

The way he stayed with Valentine after he thought she passed, and the way he came to Heloïse as "the judge" but still wanted to come back later and give her a life with their son somewhere far away. Because he still loves her. And he knows that, though what she did was horrible, her intentions were coming from a mother wanting a good life for her son, and he respected that. But then she had killed herself when he came back, and killed Edward too. The way Villefort hoped Edward was still alive and how he held him was just so. Augh. And then going insane after all this, he just loved them so genuinely much and I wish the anime showed that side of him.

[megamett44-lover]

what if you write a fic about the triplets and the reader going through a drive thru - but - the reader gets ketchup on their burger. when the triplets and reader get to the sturniolo house to hang out afterwards, matt and reader are hanging out and matt gives the reader a kiss. since the reader had ketchup before, he's trying to ignore it and like trying to hide it because he doesn't want to hurt her feelings but she ends up finding out anyways- and just finds it hilarious. (it could be an established relationship or they confess and then kiss, whichever you think works better)

love your works and take your time writing this one <33

thank you sm 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

Matt Sturniolo × Reader

Summary: In which a trip down memory lane leads to a confession

Warnings/Notes: Profanity, she/her pronouns

Requested? Yes!

First Kiss

It was exactly 12:02 a.m. when my phone pinged with an incoming text message. I push my textbooks off my lap and roll over to grab my phone. A simple “Come outside” from Matt is at the top of my notifications.

“This kid and his ominous texts.” I laugh, putting on my slippers.

Locking my apartment and making my way downstairs, I notice the minivan parked in front of the building.

“Hey Y/N!” Chris screams as he pops his head through the sunroof.

“Shut up!” I whisper-shout. “There are people who are actually sleeping in there and I don’t feel like getting evicted my first month here!”

Walking to the drivers side, I open the back door to see Madi and Nick.

“Hey guys.” I say, getting in and sitting on the floor between Nick and Madi.

“Hey girl.” Madi says.

“Were you asleep? You look exhausted.” Nick notes.

“Gee thanks.” I roll my eyes playfully. “I was actually studying for my test tomorrow.”

“Gross school.” Chris comments.

“Very gross.” I groan. “Not that I don’t love you guys or anything, but why am I here?”

“You need a break from being holed up in your tiny ass apartment.” Chris says.

“And we missed you.” Madi adds.

“So we’re going to Mcdonald’s.” Matt says, backing out of the parking lot.

“Oh I’d kill for a big mac right now.” I say, mouth watering at the idea.

“And we may or may not be filming a little.” Nick says, referring to the camera in his lap. “If you don’t want to be in it, that’s totally fine too!”

“That’s fine.” I say. “But I look like a homeless rat.”

“You don’t look like a homeless rat.” Matt says.

“Yeah, you look like a rat with a very nice apartment.” Chris jokes.

“I actually hate you.” I mumble as everyone laughs.

Pulling into the McDonalds drive through, Nick orders for everyone. We get our food and find a secluded parking lot and set up to film.

Taking a bite from my burger, I sigh. “This burger is so fucking good.”

“It’s not that serious, Y/N.” Chris laughs.

“I haven’t had McDonalds in forever.” I protest. “It is that serious.”

“Alright, we asked you guys to send in some things you want us to talk about from our childhood, so we’re going to be doing that.” Nick says.

“Oh God.” I groan, closing my eyes. “This is going to be embarrassing.”

“Why?” Madi asks.

“Because Y/N used to be a dork.” Chris laughs.

“Okay at least I didn’t sleep in a Pokémon onsie until I was 12.” I say.

“That was me!” Matt says.

“Oh I know.” I laugh.

Nick looks down at his phone, pulling up Instagram to check the answers from his story. “What’s one injury you remember from childhood?”

“Probably the time Justin hit me with a golf club.” Matt says.

“That was terrifying.” I say. “I remember Nick running to my house in his underwear freaking out because he didn’t like blood.”

“Oh my God, I forgot about that.” Nick says. “Your mom was so confused.”

“Mine was probably when Chris pushed me off of the monkey bars at school and I got a concussion.” I say, taking a french fry from the bag.

“I did not push you!” Chris exclaims.

“You most definitely did.” Matt corrects.

“Yeah because I just so happened to fall off of the monkey bars.” I say sarcastically.

“You were clumsy.” Chris says.

“Matt witnessed it!” I say, throwing a fry at Chris.

“Yeah, you were mad because she cut in front of you in line, so you pushed her off.” Matt explains.

“Whatever.” Chris grumbles.

“One time, Y/N was yelling at me to come downstairs and I fell because someone put oil on the top step.” Nick says.

“In my defense, it was Chris’ idea.” I say.

“Yeah that was me, I’ll admit that.” Chris says.

“You were a demon, oh my God.” Madi laughs.

“He still is.” Matt agrees.

“Oooo what do you think about this one, Y/N?” Nick asks, showing me his phone.

Someone had wrote “Tell us about your first kiss!”

I genuinely start rolling laughing. “I don’t know, I don’t want your fan girls to hate me for this.”

“What is it?” Matt asks.

Nick responds by passing his phone up front to Matt and Chris. Matt reads it and his cheeks immediately turn red.

“Oh this is good!” Chris says. “I say Y/N and Matt goes first.”

Matt rolls his eyes and puts his face in his hands.

“Alright, so we’re going to be talking about our first kisses.” I say. “And mine just so happened to be with Matt.”

Madi gasps. “No way.” She laughs.

“Yes way.” I laugh with her. “We were like what, 13, 14, Matt?”

“I was in 8th grade and you were in 7th, so yeah that sounds right.” Matt says muffled through his hands.

“I was getting picked on because I was the only girl in my friend group who hadn’t had a first kiss yet and I was complaining to Matt about it.” I say.

“This is so cheesy.” Nick laughs.

“Shut up!” I laugh. “So I was complaining to Matt about it and he offered to be my first kiss. So we kissed. That’s it.”

“So wait, was she your first kiss too?” Madi asks Matt.

“Yeah, she was.” Matt answers.

“That’s so cute!” Madi exclaims.

“It was super awkward.” I say. “We made a promise to never talk about it again, until now, I guess.”

“Matt did not abide by that promise.” Nick says.

“Yeah, kid would not shut up about it for like 6 months after it happened.” Chris agrees.

“Okay, yeah, yeah. It’s y’all’s turn.” Matt says, clearly embarrassed.

“Aww Matt’s embarrassed.” Chris teases, poking Matt’s ribs. “He had a little cwushy-wushy on Y/N.”

“Hey, you tried to kiss me in kindergarten!” I say, pointing to Chris. “I had almost forgot about that!”

“It was a dare!” Chris says.

“Don’t worry guys, I didn’t kiss Chris because he had cooties.” I laugh.

“I did not have cooties!” Chris says. “You were the one who made that up and told everyone!”

“I only made it up because you pushed me off the monkey bars!” I say.

“I didn’t push you!” Chris yells.

“Yes you did!” Matt and I say at the same time.

“Uh oh, not the couple ganging up on me!” Chris throws up his hands dramatically.

“Alright, cootie boy.” I roll my eyes.

“You know what?” Chris says, practically launching himself into the backseat trying to tickle me.

“Madi help!” I scream, trying to deflect Chris as much as possible.

“You guys are actually children.” Nick says.

“Oh you want some too, big dog?” Chris says, shifting his attention to Nick.

“Chris!” Nick screams, almost dropping his Dr.Pepper on him.

The rest of the video goes off without a hitch. By the time we were finished filming, it was 2:30 a.m.

“Madi is gonna stay with us tonight, you wanna just stay at ours?” Nick asks, packing up the camera.

“C’mon, Y/N!” Chris says. “It’ll be just like old times.”

“I can never say no to a sleepover.” I laugh. “Count me in.”

“Thank God, I’ll need some female energy in that house.” Madi says, dapping me up.

As we drove back to the triplets house, I had noticed Matt was extra quiet. I put it off as being tired, but the way I kept catching him look at me in the rear view mirror made me think otherwise.

Pulling into the house, we all piled out and made our way inside.

“Goodnight, everyone.” Nick says, venturing off to his room.

Madi hugged me. “See you in the morning!” She says, following behind Nick.

“Where you sleeping, Y/N?” Chris asks. “You know my rooms always open.”

I laugh. “No offense, Chris, but you won’t be going to sleep for another three hours and I’m exhausted.” I flop down on the couch, pulling a blanket over me. “I’ll just sleep here.”

“No way.” Matt says. “You do not have to sleep on the couch. You can stay in mine if you want?”

Chris laughs, making kissy noises as he walks downstairs to his room.

“Jesus, that kid.” I laugh. I look over at Matt, who is looking at me with expectant eyes. “Yeah, I’ll sleep in your room, if that’s cool?”

“Mi casa es su casa.” Matt says, walking down the hall to his room.

“Okay, Flo-Rida.” I say, following him.

Matt flops down on the bed, throwing a pillow over his face. Walking over, I yank the pillow off of him.

“Hey!” He protests.

I sit down beside him. “Okay, spill.” I demand.

Matt looks at me quizzically. “What do you mean?”

“Ever since I talked about our kiss, you’ve been acting weird. Spill.” I say.

“I haven’t.” Matt says. “I’m just tired.”

“Mhm.” I say. “I don’t believe you.”

“Why not?” Matt rolls his eyes.

“Just don’t.” I shrug. I roll over to the other side of the bed, getting under the blankets.

Matt flips the lights off, before joining me in bed.

“Goodnight, Matt.” I say, rolling over to face him.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” Matt says, pulling the blankets over him as well.

It’s silent for about 5 minutes, and I feel myself starting to doze off, when suddenly, the weight in the bed shifts. I open my eyes to see Matt sitting up beside me.

“Matt, what’re you-” I start.

“I like you, Y/N.” Matt blurts out.

I blink my eyes really hard to make sure I’m not dreaming and I shake my head.

“Ever since we were kids, I’ve liked you.” Matt says. “The feelings would come and go, and I really tried to make them go for the sake of our friendship, but I really, really like you, Y/N.”

Matt looks back at me as I stare wide-eyed at him. “Really?” I whisper.

“Why do you think I volunteered to be your first kiss?” Matt asks. “Chris wasn’t lying when he said I talked about that kiss for 6 months. He wasn’t lying when he said I had a crush on you. I could just…never find the right time to tell you.”

I sit up beside Matt, grabbing his hand. “I really wish you would’ve told me sooner.” I say.

“I know, I’m sorry.” Matt says. “You don’t know how much it killed me to see you with other guys, Y/N. That shit was so unbearable.”

It’s silent for a moment before Matt sighs deeply.

“I understand if you don’t feel the same way, I really do. But I just had to tell you so-” I cut Matt off by placing my lips on his.

Feeling his lips against mine, suddenly I’m 13 again in Boston having my first kiss with my best friend. His hands find the sides of my face and it’s like the world stopped spinning. It’s like everything around us has faded away and it’s just us.

We pull away slowly, each of us gasping for air.

“I don’t know where I got the balls to do that.” I whisper. I open my eyes to notice Matt grimacing a bit.

“What’s wrong?” I ask. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“No, no. Nothings wrong.” Matt says, grabbing my hand.

“No, something is definitely wrong.” I say.

Matt turns a little red before looking at his lap. “It’s just…was there ketchup on your burger earlier?”

“Yeah…?” I say, confused. And then it suddenly makes sense. I throw myself back into the bed, dying in a fit of laughter. “Oh my God!” I laugh, gasping for air.

I sit up, looking at Matt. “I am so sorry.” I say, still laughing.

“It’s okay.” He says, smiling. “I’ll taste ketchup every day as long as it’s from your lips.”

I roll my eyes. “You’re so corny.”

“Maybe.” He smiles. “So is it safe to say you feel the same?”

“Don’t make me kiss you with my ketchup breath again, Matthew.” I say.

“Is that a promise?” Matt asks, slowly pulling me back into another kiss.

a/n: help this is one of the longest stories I’ve written. but if I were to make a tag list, who would want to be added to it???

[pynkhues]

omg that analysis was everything!! thank you sm! really was a palette cleanser. would love the continuation with the parts you didn't get to - his relationship with jonah and the dynamic within the rue royal household. the housewife insult from claudia really did a number on the fandom's reading of louis. (still not over people seriously considering him the embodiment of "edwardian housewife" archetype while lestat is a classic patriarch. dunno if i wanna laugh or cry).

(x)

Thank you! And yeah, I think I've mentioned it before, but it's interesting to me that so many people take both Claudia's housewife insult and Grace's white daddy insult as effectively one-to-one attributes instead of as weapons of emasculation to not only try and hurt Louis, but to goad him into action.

The dynamic of the Rue Royale household is probably it's own entire answer, and one that might be best answered after I've finished my re-watch, but yes! Let's talk about Jonah. Or, well, about sex, haha.

Virtue and the gothic heroine

One of the key attributes of a gothic heroine is her virtue, because Gothicism as a genre is rooted intrinsically in the loss of that virtue. What that means or looks like exactly changes – in the earliest stories within the genre, that loss of virtue was a result of perversion or corruption and usually spelled doom for the heroine, and in later stories it marked a point of transformation or metamorphosis where the loss of that virtue often came to symbolise a transition from girlhood to adulthood.

Virtue was, and still is, often depicted in the genre through virginity as excellently stated in the paper Female Virtue in Gothic Literature 1780-1810 “female morality was irrevocably intertwined with a sexual code of conduct. Daughters…were reminded that their most important attribute was intact virginity and wives were constantly retold their worth relied upon their chastity and therefore their ability to bear legitimate children.”

This came to define gothic literature, and her loss of virginity became pretty vital as a character beat as it would mark this loss of agency which I talked about a bit in the last post. Significantly too though, the gothic heroine usually has men after her virtue. Which, well, - -

As put in this paper Haunted Heroines: An Examination of the Complication of the Gothic Heroine: “She is the object of the perverted sexual desire of older men, above all representing the innocence and purity that the men are themselves negations of.”

Typically, when she did lose her virginity, she’d end up with three options: she could marry the man who took her virginity, she could “give up the idea of marriage and take holy orders” (aka become a nun), or she could die. Regardless of the decision she makes, the actual choice is a really marked moment for the gothic heroine, as it’s often the only actual moment of agency she gets in a story which is invested in her disempowerment. She has to give herself away – to a husband, to God, or to death – because the gothic, particularly the female gothic, understands that once her body has been taken by a man, it can never be her own again for better and for worse.

Claudia loses her virginity way back in season 1, but she’s robbed even of that momentary agency, because her body itself stays virginal. She does not get to make a choice. The monstrosity of Claudia’s making is that she will never not be an innocent, the virtuousness that men seek to take from her can never be taken, and thus she is never allowed transformation, she is never allowed her moment of agency, and she can never belong to another. It re-emphasises her arrested development, but it also keeps her trapped as the gothic heroine in Louis and Lestat’s house forever. There is no getting out for Claudia, she dies without transformation, she dies so that she can be mourned by the monsters in the house.

The Byronic Hero and the Past

On the flip side of that, the Byronic Hero is, inherently, a romantic, both physically and poetically, or as Jean Ann Bates put in her excellent 1949 essay “The Byronic hero is distinguished by the clearly defined existence of sensuousness and its antithesis, sensitiveness.” After all, as an archetype, he’s based on Lord Byron who fucked his way through Venice while producing some of the most romantic poetry ever, in history.

Bates continues:

“The Byronic hero is almost always a man with a mysterious past. This past is usually surmised to be of wickedness and sin, and our hero is periodically haunted by feelings of remorse concerning it…the mood of the Byronic hero is one of intense melancholy and pessimism; yet we feel underlying this apparently static exterior, the beat of throbbing life energy. Like the Corsair, the Byronic hero is ‘warp’d by the world of disappointment. He seems to loathe himself and all mankind, and is always one apart from his fellow creatures…The Byronic hero’s  character is amoral rather than immoral…The Byronic hero is all that is characteristic of the somewhat jaded cosmopolitan man of the world.”

The whole essay’s a great read, and I think again, really encapsulates Louis’ character, but I wanted to talk a little bit about this sense of a mysterious past and one surmised to be of wickedness and sin, because I think it’s an overlooked part of Louis’ arc.

Because he tells us in such soaring, and romantic detail, this large portion of his life, it can be easy to think we know all of it, when really, there’s a lot we don’t know about Louis as a young man. We meet him when he’s 33-years-old, we know that his father is dead, that the sugar plantation his father owned went broke, that he and his brother had a chapter of their shared life where they shuffled for pennies, but we lack a lot of context beyond these glimmers of what Louis tells us.

In particular, we don’t really know that much about his sexual history before Lestat, which is actually pretty typical of the Byronic Hero. Think the reveal of Rochester’s wife in Jane Eyre or Heathcliff’s three year absence where he mysteriously returns wealthy in Wuthering Heights and soon marries Isabella, the Byronic Hero has chapters that remain unrevealed to us, and part of that is often soaked in sexual or romantic undertones.

In the first episode, Louis talks about the fact that he didn’t consider himself a homosexual, which I think can become a focus, but I’m more interested in the earlier exchange with Daniel where Louis articulates using Lily as cover for his sexuality.

If you take this scene at face value, and look at it on its own, Louis’ saying yes, he had urges towards men, but his faith was keeping him in check, only if you look at it with the scene before it, we see him refuse to enter the church confessional after joking with Paul that Paul is wasting people's time as he has nothing to confess. An implication, perhaps, that Louis knows that he does.  

My reading of that has always been that Louis was sleeping with men in New Orleans long before Lestat came into the picture, and probably a fair few, but the show plays with Louis’ unreliable narration and the mystery of his sexual history to shroud that really until Jonah’s introduction. Jonah, after all, not only confirms that Louis had been with other men prior to Lestat, (as does Louis’ familiarity with the bayou as a gay hook up site), and that he wasn’t keeping much of anything at bay through the threat of absolution, but that he was sleeping with boys.

Louis’ 33 when he’s turned in 1910, and we know from the notice in this episode that we’re now in 1917, so Louis should be 40. We don’t know how old Jonah is, but given they look like contemporaries now, I think you could pretty safely gauge that if Louis was hooking up with him when Jonah was 16, he was probably in his mid-twenties. The context of the era is, of course, important, and there are a million reasons why Louis might have taken the opportunity with a teenager (although I think given Louis’ relationship with power, particularly in the NOLA era, we can assume that plays a role) but the narrative choice of the show to make Jonah a teenager when they hooked up – just like the choice to have Madeleine sleep with a Nazi teenager – is a deliberate ethical muddying of the waters to show that these elements of the monstrousness and the predator existed in him prior to his turning.

Louis is not, and has never been virtuous. He is not chaste when Lestat first has sex with him, and he is not an innocent when Lestat turns him. He can’t be corrupted, because, like a true Byronic hero, he is corrupt.

I could talk more here about the Paris park hook-ups, or the 128 boys in San Francisco (literally the most Byron thing imaginable to fuck your way through the city and then try and write a book about your ex lmao), but I think it’s worth leaving it at the New Orleans era, because I think what Jonah represents is not just Louis’ tendency to paint himself in the best light, but the mystery of his past and his inherent sexual agency which is vital to a Byronic hero. Louis is deeply feeling, and he’s capable of being in love with Lestat and having his heart dance with another man, he’s allowed sexual agency and sexual freedom even if it does lead to a bitter fight with Lestat because he's not under the thumb of the patriarch, he is one of the patriarchs. Lestat might follow after all, he might watch, but he doesn’t interrupt, he doesn’t exert control, in fact he fills the house with other men to offer Louis the deepening of depravity even through his own jealousy and, notably, empties the house when Louis tells him to.

Again, this goes back to what I was saying in the last post, but Louis doesn’t lack agency. The townhouse is not a prison to him, Lestat’s patriarchal, yes, but so’s Louis, he’s just more emotionally manipulative about how he keeps Claudia close to him. Louis' sexuality is a huge part of him, but it also doesn't define him in the way Claudia's virginity does. After all, for Claudia her sexuality is symbolic of her eternal chastity and girlhood, a gothic heroine locked in a prison of her own innocence, whereas for Louis, it gets to be so much more, because as a Byronic Hero, he gets to be so much more.

[reshinless]

may i ask (politely) for a chuuya x reader where his lover is just like- in the nicest way possible, a mix of a german shepard person and a calico cat. They are just the sweetest person, yet also can get upset if called out or someone insults those close to them (as in full on plotting a murder but is too sweet to actually go through with it) like just a normal day story pls- if they were also a pm member I'd love you to the moon-

─── my only one, moon and sun..

𝜗𝜚 synopsis. the sweetest ever!!!... plus chuuya i guess /j (chuuya x really nice reader

𝜗𝜚 pairings. chuuya x gn!reader

𝜗𝜚 director's notice. HIII I LOVE THIS IDEA SM. ty for sending this in. IM SO SORRY THAT I COULDN'T MAKE READER A PM MEMB I COULDN'T FIND A SILLY NICE CUTE WAY TO WRITE FOR THEM :( i wanted to do like a lil story b4 the actual thing so i'm sorry.. you can say i got a little carried away (i forgot the prompt) follow & rb to support ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ

pre-relationship!chuuya who was surprised by how undeniably sweet you were to him. didn't you know how dangerous he was?

pre-relationship!chuuya who had just helped you from a robber who tried to snatch your bag. you were just sweet enough to invite him out for dinner as a thank you

and boy was pre-relationship!chuuya all over the idea. although enamoured by the mere thought of being out with someone who was everything he ever looked for in someone, he kept refusing, not wanting to take up any of your precious time. but you were stubborn, and firmly insisted on taking him out. and god did he like that.

pre-relationship!chuuya who'd already forgotten the meeting he was supposed to attend at 7:00pm sharp. it's already 8 and he's still talking with you. but of course, he didn't wanna make the interest too obvious, but subtle enough to notice.

and finally when you two exit the restaurant, pre-relationship!chuuya's eyes can't help but broaden as you tell him 'thank you'. damn he hasn't heard that in forever. awkwardly had to look away, gosh this was the first- no it wasn't even a damn date! and his face was already dusted with pink.

"look it's fine.. really it is.. it's what any good person would've done seeing your situation." ( ˶°ㅁ°) !! "but i still want to say it. i still want to tell you thank you. not many people are good nowadays, you know." (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ )

although before pre-relationship!chuuya didn't wanna make it obvious, definitely wanted another dinner like this with you.

"...say how about i walk you home? the least i could do after dinner. wouldn't want your purse/bag to get stolen again do we?" (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧ a brief chuckle from you, and a smile forms. damn is it just him or were you just smiling at him? "sure! chuuya right?" "y-yeah! yeah! yes!"

safe to say that wouldn't be the last time pre-relationship!chuuya walked you home. he'd make sure it wasn't at least.

boyfriend!chuuya who suddenly had the need to let you spend all his money. even if you refused. that's so honestly why he fell for you in the first place.

boyfriend!chuuya who followed you into any store you went to, card in hand, and suggested to buy anything you picked up.

boyfriend!chuuya who was minding his own business while accompanying you to the cute little fruit mugs over there 'till two rude girls who were suddenly arriving in the same aisle as you both were in

"oh my gosh.. no way that girl is going out with a man so small.." "yeah literally.. i would never have said yes. can't believe there are actually women that prefer men below 6ft!"

boyfriend!chuuya's whose eyes twitched hearing what they'd just said, but then decided not to mind them. if he'd learned anything from you, he wouldn't say anything back.

but you never said you wouldn't talk back.

"what do you mean? he's nicer than your deadbeat father for sure."

the two girls gave a look of disgust but quickly left. and your expression, well more like your demeanor changed as they did.

"we should get the banana and strawberry ones, right? let's match!" "huh? oh yeah sure."

boyfriend!chuuya is still stunned from what you said, but ended up just muttering an "yeah sure" before you both paid and left the store.

boyfriend!chuuya who asked why did you defend him, even when you weren't trashtalked about, after you both left and got ice cream.

"well we're partners now right? no one should talk about you like that. besides, you aren't that short." ٩(^ᗜ^ )و ´- "of course i am not!!" ୧(๑•̀ᗝ•́)૭

boyfriend!chuuya who loves it so much when you defend him after that interaction. you aren't afraid to assert yourself to others. you aren't afraid to tell them something bad in return. and damn was it hot to see how you looked confronting anyone who had insulted either of you two.

boyfriend!chuuya who's so in love with you what a silly little guy

GN ITS BEEN SO LONG SINCE I'VE WRITTEN FOR BSD..! i hope this was somewhat coordinated with the prompt dear anon

[yeondollie]

ʙᴀᴍ ʏᴀɴɢ ɢᴀɴɢ ౨ৎ ♡ .ᐟ

'i closed the chapter on the days we spent together.'

. . warnings ; ANGST .ᐟ, breaking up, argument, fem reader, taehyun is kinda mean, crying, heartbreak, reader is needy, taehyun gets annoyed of reader, just over all sad ecfhuehfusih !!

a/n ; i have been listening in bam yang gang on repeat its so so so good but so sad :(. the beat is so adorable and so is bibi i love her sm sm but the song is so sad and as soon as i heard it i thought about making a story with it . this is just a drabble so i dont have a word count sorry :< anyways, enjoy !! ₊˚⊹ ᰔ

"why do you want so much out of me? can i have some peace and quiet to myself? god.." here we were again. arguing with taehyun was getting more and more common, though you hated it. taehyun knew you were a sensitive person and didn't like conflict but you were just pissing him off lately.

you didn't know what to say really. though you were only trying to check up on him after work, he wasn't having it. "it's like you're attached to my hip, truly." you suck in the tears in your eyes as he says this. you didn't wanna fight, you just wanted to please him in any way you could.

"yes i-i.. i'll give you time. i’m sorry." you say, tearing still welling in your eyes. this, for some reason, set taehyun off completely. why couldn’t you stand up for yourself? it was pathetic in his eyes. “see! thats why im upset. you’re like a doormat- you get walked all over, it’s pathetic.” he scoffs, letting out a small laugh even.

holding the tears back, about to flow, you mutter out some words. “you’re r-right, i’m s-sorry.” you sniffle a bit, looking up at the ceiling to avoid the tears falling out of your eyes. you’ve never felt more pathetic in your life, it was such a horrible feeling. taehyun didn’t seem phased at all, walking up and getting in your face.

“so thats it? sorry? you think thats gonna fix everything?” he says, his face only inches from yours. it was weird, usually when he was this close he would be kissing you or looking at you longingly but no. not this time, not anymore. the only time he looked at you was with lust or anger behind his eyes.

it felt like the two of you would only have sex or only argue, it was tiring- so tiring. he used to hold your cold hand in his own warm hand. he used to kiss your forehead and play with your hair, what happened? the tears flickered down your cheek as you answered him. “t-tyun i.. i don’t know what else to d-do.” now quickly wiping your own tears.

when he realizes you’re crying, he doesn’t bat an eye. its like all his love for you was drained from his heart- you hated it so much. “you know what _____? we’re done. i cant fucking do this with you anymore. you’re just so.. so needy and dumb!” he raises his voice, now watching you flinch in front of him.

you didn’t even have the energy to stop him, watching him with blurry eyes. watching how much he changed over the span of you two dating was shocking and saddening to you. oh how you longed for the sweet taehyun you once had.

before he could exit your house, forever saying bye to him you did one last thing. “taehyun..?” you whisper, not even having the energy to talk loudly. “what?” he whips back at you. you grab his school name tag he gave you, when he first confessed his feelings for you when the two of you were still in high school.

grabbing his name tag, along with your own- you walked up to him gently. you placed your name tag in his hand, looking into his angry eyes. “so you can remember me, you promised me you’d never forget me right?”

his eyes flickered with sympathy one final last time.

[discordiansamba]

the SECOND you mentioned werewolf toph i immediately wanted to yell YES bc urgh in that au? oh absolutely toph would become one of the wolves. then again i am so v weak for any toph & zuko sibling stuff. god i love your aus sm.

werewolf toph is so powerful that she bust her way into the AU and there was nothing I could about it. girl who 100% would consent to become a Creature as long as she got to keep her earthbending. who cares about her parents! she gets to run freely and do whatever she wants now! and she's got a whole pack of siblings to spend all of her time with now. this is GREAT.

absolute terror who still loves roughhousing even as a human. everyone should just be grateful that this isn't a traditional werewolf story so she can't turn people by biting them, because she will not hesitate to bite. it takes the human members of the Gaang forever to learn that when Zuko and Toph are going at it, they're just playing. they kind of got used to Zuko's whole thing only for Toph to join them and make it exceedingly obvious that he's a wolf in human skin.

(when she discovers that her brother is a firebender, she's thrilled. we can do this human thing they call sparring. I heard them talking about it at the Earth Rumble. It's where we try to beat each other up with our elements.

katara heaves a long suffering sigh, and gets her water skin ready.)

[capn-twitchery]

I love your ocs but I fear I am a bit out of touch with some of their lore. how much does Grace know about the red honey fuckery?

thank you sm!! :D♥︎ don't worry--i'm not sure i've actually spoken about this a whole lot!! (plus my lore is scattered around random posts like a ransom note. imagine being organised, couldn't be me)

for context: the two of them are a ridiculously slow slowburn bc neither of them know how to talk about feelings, they go in different directions a lot, twitch's response to Having Feelings (or anything) is to disappear to zee. everything takes forever. there's a summary of their timeline here if you want it !!

ANYWAY to answer:

tl;dr summary: most of the time, nothing! eventually, more than anybody else.

so, for most of the time, grace knows absolutely nothing. nobody does, really--twitch doesn't tell anybody, they don't want to talk about it, nobody sees their face at all.

as far as anyone knows, including grace, twitch's bad memory, lying & inconsistent stories are just a personality quirk. and they get sick sometimes, they just need bedrest & won't be available for a few hours, a day, a couple of days. nobody is allowed to see them.

grace remains mostly unaware for a long time--he has inklings that something is up. once he gets to know twitch better, he can tell they're not themself sometimes. but prying would push twitch away, so he just offers help, if they want company, for their headaches the surgeon mentioned. he'll leave the cabin door unlocked, just in case.

he has no idea how bad the "headaches" are until it's happening right in front of him, once they're close enough for twitch to trust him to that degree. he has no idea why it's happening, but he knows twitch doesn't want to tell him, either. and when they're sobbing in his lap, pleading for something he doesn't understand to stop, begging him to help them tie a blindfold because they don't want him to see their face, it's not exactly the time to pry.

it happens a few times. it never gets easier, and it never gets any clearer. it's not til after grace leaves for the new sequence and comes back that he finally sees their face uncovered. he doesn't connect any dots-whether that's because he genuinely just doesn't make the connection, or because twitch doesn't want him to make a big deal about it, who knows!

while he was gone, twitch starts connecting some dots: something's weird with their memories. they don't know how to process it. they bring it up subtly, ask grace if he knows anything about red honey, and maybe he can figure it out himself. he tells them he does, he learned about it during nemesis, in the palace cage gardens. it still haunts him, sometimes, the prisoners with their crying, the suffering the hollow looking eyes-

the eyes.

everything clicks all at once-twitch's eyes, their headaches, the memory issues, the inconsistencies, the lies. it only gets worse when twitch tells him they're starting to wonder if the memories are all theirs.

oh, god. how could anybody do that to them? who did that to them? but twitch doesn't want him on any kind of revenge mission, they don't even think they remember where the cage garden was, and they don't want to try either. he settles for comforting them the best he can-but what can anyone do to help, really?

at the very least, trusting someone enough to talk about it is a huge weight off twitch's shoulders. grace can help them try to figure out what's going on with their memories, it makes them better at talking to each other. it's not easy, but it helps twitch to move forward-slowly, but surely

[panlight]

Not sure if you've watched this anime (or might not be into anime in general, that's ok!) but I recently got into a vampire comedy anime called "The Vampire Dies in No Time" and there was one episode that stood out to me and gave me huge Twilight vibes.

basically there's this vampire who's trying to get away from this human who's constantly chasing him (he meant to feed on a different human, but she mistook his advances for flirting and has been obsessed since). The human girl really wants to be a vampire to be together with him forever, which is why she's always going "bite me!" Soon she gets run over by a vehicle as she tries to save him, and because he's touched by her sacrifice he gives in and turns her into a vampire.

Upon breing transformed, the characters remark on how powerful she is and she even makes some comment about how she's now in her "true form", implying she was always meant to be a vampire.

Now, i dont know how popular Twilight is in Japan so it could just be a coincidence, but it's funny how much it parallels Bella's "born to be a vampire" ""character arc"". The human girl in that episode, upon becoming a vampire, even wears a blue dress and heels just like Bella did in BD and I find that a hilarious cojncidence if it is! 😂😂

Not familiar with the anime but thanks for sharing! Does seem to have some Bella vibes. And the blue dress and heels seems almost like a specific reference!

Bella being born to be a vampire and having a super easy time of it was never going to be for me. It's not what I want out of vampire stories. Just not my vibe. And that's fine! God knows there are a million male power fantasies where random dude is the chosen one or a natural at some thing and everyone is wowed by his amazingness. Girls should get in on that action. Bella can be the everygirl turned born to be a vampire heroine. But, as I said, just not for me.

The larger problem, IMO, is that, well, I don't know that Bella the Super Vampire was necessarily the Plan all along. That, again, the way these books were written did them a bit of a disservice. The first book was based on a dream about a girl and a vampire in a meadow where the vampire is talking about how much he loves her but also how much he wants to kill her. That sets the tone. The vampire is tortured by this, it's fraught, it's difficult. I'm here for it. This is the Vibe. This is exactly the kind of thing that gets me about vampire stories. And then after SM wrote Twilight -- for herself, remember! Not initially to be published! -- she wrote "a bunch of epilogues" that included E/B getting married, Renesmee being born, Bella becoming a vampire, because she wasn't ready to let these characters go. And my hunch, as someone who has done some writing and has done the "here is a story, but oh I still like these characters, what might happen next?" and spun off into 'epilogues,' is that the Bella becomes a vampire and is amazing at it only happened then. Because, again, in Twilight she only blocks Edward's power. Alice and Jasper's work on her just fine. I suspect that while writing these epilogues she was like "oh well I guess the only solution is for Bella to become a vampire. What should her power be? Well, Edward can't read her mind! Maybe she's immune to ALL THE POWERS! But, whoops, Alice and Jasper work on her. So maybe I can come up with a work around."

And none of this is "bad" necessarily, it's just that when she went back to write the middle books, she leaned more on the vibes of Twilight (that vampirism was kind of sad and hard and bad; Edward hates that part of himself, Rosalie hates it, Carlisle's unsure if he did the right thing in 'saving' them, Jasper nearly kills her over a paper cut, newborn Bree suffering trying not to eat Bella after the fight, the wolfpack exist to fight vampires because they are bad and dangerous and evil, the burning painful thirst they can never quite satisfy with animal blood, etc) and then after three books go back to the happily ever after epilogue of "actually vampirism is super easy, barely an inconvenience" and it seems less like a fun surprise and more like "well now that my protagonist is a vampire I don't want it to be difficult or painful or sad."

Which is all to say if that's the ending she wanted all along (and I think she did want it pretty early on, but still not until after she wrote the first book), she could have done more to set it up in a way that felt organic vs what we get in Breaking Dawn where even Bella's saying things like "I'm mysteriously good at this" and it flies in the face of the struggles of all the other 'good' vampire characters. I keep coming back to the that the first three books are about 'saving' her from a vampiric existence that becomes meaningless when it's like "actually this is the True Form and she was born to be a vampire all along" in the last one.

[athena-xox]

Eah ships and their Taylor Swift song

Tailor Quick

Dexven - The Archer

I could have said enchanted but that’s a copout. Anyways when I first listened to lover and heard the archer I immediately thought of them. “I cut off my nose, just to spite my face” is so Raven and her relationship with her mom. “I’ve got a hundred thrown up speeches I almost said to you” is also literally dexter. “All of my heroes die all alone” raven mfn queen. I could literally quote any lyric and related it to dexter raven or their relationship.

Dizzie - King Of My Heart

You know how in songs people don’t say normal things? And how they say like metaphors, rhymes and weird extra or missing words? That’s literally riddlish. And komh feels very Lizzie coded. And the title speaks for itself.

Dappling - Paper Rings

I also thought this immediately when I heard the song that it was very much apple and Darling. The fact that paper rings literally says darling in it… The archer is from both raven/dexters perspectives but paper rings is specifically Apples perspective of Darling. “I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this” I rest my case.

Bribelle - Don’t Blame Me alternatively I Can See You

I literally don’t have to say anything. For either song.

Huntlynn - Love Story

Forbidden love. Sneaking out to a garden is so Huntlynn coded. Just like the visuals of it all>>

Heartlockes - You Are In Love or “Slut!”

And historians will call them roommates. “One night he wakes, strange look on his face, pauses then says, you’re my best friend. And you knew what it was, he is in love” but like replace he with she. My fav friends to lovers. Unrelated but I was so shocked when I found out so many people hate Blondie. Also I could see this song from either perspective. And with slut it’s basically the same song just sm more aesthetic and well I feel like people would probably call Cupid a slut (my poor baby) because god (fairygod? Narrative? Gods? Grimm?) Forbid a goddess of love talk about… love.

Farrahlynn - tolerate it

Istg they need a better ship name. But no one ships them !! *Sighs* I see them as tragic unrequited in love with your childhood best friend who has a boyfriend and is now popular. Literally any song off of evermore fits them. I want more people to ship them!! If I had to give a happy (ish) song I’d say snow on the beach.

Dexpid - Foolish One

I like to forget Cupid ever had a crush on dexter. But if I had to acknowledge it it’s fs foolish one.

Bunnistair - Wonderland

I mean we knew it was coming. Also wtf is their ship name. Going with my personal hc (aka my canon ‘rearrangement’) I like to think that Alistair wasn’t also a wonderlandian and that he found wonderland (lmao Chissy Columbus) after Lizzie, Kitty, Maddie, Hatter and the White Queen had already left. And like he fulfilled his whole destiny literally missing the mad hatter, Cheshire Cat, and Queen of hearts. And that he lowkey went insane there.

Crystlynn - Forever Winter

More of athena rearranging canon; evil crystal!! And like basically the snow queen and crystal (snow king erasure bc what was the point in making him be the one who goes all crazy instead of the literal snow queen) purposefully mad it winter forever because they’re villain (Jackie Frost and Northwind erasure because they’re fucking useless and annoying). But like Crystal deep inside doesn’t want to be a villain and Ashlynn slowly starts melting (haha) her cold exterior. But then Crystals like sike and that’s when this song takes place. (I beg people to start shipping Ash/Crystal and Ash/Farrah more)

[luthienne]

hey lovely hi! I wanted to ask you something about writing. First of all i love love love the way you write matt and Frank! So on point and detailed and so well observed. I wanted to know how do you understand them i mean what are your ways to study a character?

I hope I'm making sense and im sorry for being a bother 😭 love you.

hi first of all i love you sm for this oh my god?? you're not a bother at all, i could talk about matt forever. writing him true to character is the highest compliment i could ask for 🥹

several thoughts come to mind — first i think of the characters as they are individually, then as they are tied to one another; once tied together through the threads of the story, there is no separating them. just as there is no separating the choices they make now from all the choices in the past that led up to this moment. where do the boundaries of the character as laid out in the source material brush up against the boundaries of the character as i understand them & what archetypal role are they fulfilling (if relevant).

also the mutability of the boundary between archetypes: i.e. matt descends into 'hell' to bring frank out, orpheus role; matt hears & carries everything, god-like role; matt accepts this as a call to action, hero; matt takes it upon himself to punish these 'evildoers', devil; matt takes these sins upon himself, christ figure; matt is wounded in his noble pursuit, martyr figure. & how do his roles change in relation to the characters he shares a scene with — fisk (god-like in seemingly limitless influence) / matt (hero/martyr).

what life is there for a hero outside of their duty in a story like this? what room is there for him to be human? that's what i want to know. so i take what we know from what we've been given:

matt is the son of a boxer -> he grows up with the inherent understanding that two things can be true at once: hands capable of love can also be capable of violence

matt, as a child, saves an old man and loses his sight -> he accepts at a very young age the concept of heroic acts & their consequences (inevitability)

matt’s father chooses to die a 'hero' rather than live as a flawed but present father -> better to be a hero, to live and die by those familiar consequences than to be a flawed but present person (2nd ex. of heroes and their consequences, inevitability)

matt’s next father figure is violent but it is through that violence he learns to navigate an overwhelming world -> violence = love

stick leaves, like his father left, like his mother left -> to love is to lose (inevitability)

matt is only human, after all, it's what's most compelling about him as a character. and the show really did let us sit in those long moments of quiet witness to matt's undeniable humanity. he is flawed, he stumbles in fights, he can’t catch his breath, his faith buckles under the weight of his grief; he doesn't understand how to be human, how to maintain relationships, how to reconcile the darkest parts of the world and of himself with his faith in humanity and belief in redemption. the world is overwhelming to him on every sensory level. every touch is a modified blow? he lives that. he looks outside of himself for light (foggy, faith). when he reaches his breaking point, he breaks rather than turn to the people he loves because of the lessons he internalized as a child. stick left because matt loved, despite everything. despite everything, his love > his rage (bc his rage is his grief & his grief is another face of his love).

even after foggy finds out matt's secret life of physical violence, he still refers to him as "my soft-hearted partner" because it's true, matt cannot help but love & recognize humanity in others. it's because of this that he feels called to balance two unsustainably contradictory lives: using his voice to fight for redemption in court; taking it into his own hands when the law fails. taking their blood onto himself, by himself.

and that is the only touch he allows himself to experience—violence. blood on his knuckles, in his mouth, in his throat. and when his body is torn open and his secrets bared through his wounds, we get another glimpse into the reality of heroes and their consequences. foggy is not treated as an audience stand-in to giddily marvel at matt's abilities and how cool they are, he's heartbroken. he’s fucking devastated. his best friend is bleeding out on his apartment floor. he doesn't want matt to die. he doesn't want matt to be daredevil, he doesn’t want matt to be a hero — because foggy, more than anyone, understands matt's humanity and mortality. and foggy, more than anyone, selfishly wants matt to be his friend first. let hell’s kitchen take care of itself. why should matt die for a community that doesn’t love him like foggy loves him? that doesn’t know him like foggy knows him? he knew matt before he became a story. their time at columbia grounds their friendship & grounds matt to a life that is as close to normal as any comicbook story. they stay up late studying, they drink a little too much, they live together and achieve a kind of domesticity that comes easy to foggy but utterly incomprehensible to everything matt knew before foggy. we see a glimpse at a life with foggy that represents a gentle kind of safety and happiness — everything matt has been denied in his life until then. everything that the momentum of the story demands matt cannot keep (as hero).

and then there's frank. composed of rigid codes and immovable beliefs, just as much as matt, but on the other side of the line matt has drawn in the sand. that line represents matt’s faith in humanity and belief in redemption. despite living the worst of it, despite bearing the brunt of it. matt can't lose frank because matt never had frank; and yet matt and frank hold an inherent understanding of one another that no one else can. two sides of the same coin: unwavering & fatal sense of duty that walks them in a winding but inevitable line toward their respective fates; acceptance of the roles life has given them in what life has taken from them. it's not that they want to die, it's just that they’ve lived so long in the depths of their own private grief that they can’t see living outside of them.

so of course foggy doesn't want to matt to be a hero because there is no story where the hero comes home unscathed, there is no story where the hero is not brought to his knees. to love matt is to accept he could lose matt. either through death or through his inevitable transformation into something foggy may not recognize.

(now matt's unwritten rules by which he lives are bleeding into other characters' lives, consequences spiraling outward & outward)

a perilous thing began with wanting to explore this idea: a story that revolves around the moment when the hero is brought to their knees (figuratively & literally) that marks the separation of who they were before and who they must become after (transformation), if there is to be an after -> internal vs external consequences; forced passivity; how does the hero come back from that & who is he if/when he comes back from that. is he recognizable? i also wanted to look at the hero & the story through someone else's eyes, someone who could be more objective than me, more objective than foggy (whose love for matt clouds his observations, as it did in light perception). and who could objectively understand matt's actions & motivations better than frank? the anti-hero and matt's foil.

so i first look at the character through the lens of the story that’s been told and then the story i want to tell, i look at him through the lens of other characters and i assemble a picture from there. i look at matt through the events of his life, through his relationship with violence & his relationship with his very mortal body. unlike other superheroes he is not invincible, he is not bulletproof, he is not capable of flying, or softening a long fall; he is not capable of throwing his adversaries across a room, he is barely capable of saving himself from his own self-destructive choices. he has a damaged & unbearably human body. everything he can do he has fought tooth and nail for. he doesn't have superpowers like telekinesis or lasers that come out of his eyes; he has loss, he has grief, he has rage. we can all relate to that. he has a voice that is capable of giving a second chance to others (in court) but he lives and dies a thousand deaths inside of the silence at his core he can't find his way out of. his inability to communicate his grief or desires in a bearable way.

perhaps he finds redemption through saving others because he doesn't believe he, himself, is otherwise worthy of redemption. if he did, he would relinquish his duty as hero, he would live a quiet & happy life of domesticity with foggy. perhaps in another world he does. he lays down his mantle, or he lives in a world where he never had to take it up. he's just matt, foggy's soft-hearted partner.

[lanterns-and-daydreams]

Random post. Because I currently have no one to talk to. You can scroll. It's just me ranting about the most mundane things and talking to myself :)

Okay, now I dunno what to say. I'm not texting anyone cause I'm not gonna bother anyone in my DMs with this

MY FAVOURITE THING EVER IS SO MANY THINGS

That's so vague HAHAHAHA

I like cats SO much. OH MY GOD-

Like, if you do not like cats, I do not trust you.

Theres a cat near where I live, but she won't let me pet her babies :(

I used to call kittens 'cat babies'. I still do. It sounds cuter. But like, cats are so cute, if I get one, I'm gonna love it forever and give it lots of kisses and hugs and treats and everything it could ever want and a little cat bed and a tiny blanket and a scratchy thingy, idk what it's called, and dedicate most of my life to it and love it so so sosososososososoooooo much and they're so cute and lovable and huggable and kissable and if my future partner doesn't like cats I'm kicking them out cause I want a cat, and I'm gonna love it so much and show it off to everyone cause it's mine and I love it and I also reallllyyyyyyyy love flowers

Like, flowers are so cool. How could you NOT like flowers???? And i can name so many flowers and I told my best friend about soooooo many flowers like lotuses and sunflowers and peonies and lobelias and Cordelias and bleeding hearts and foxgloves and poppies and and and-

Anyway

OH MY GOD CAKEEEEEEEEE

I love cake SO much. Red velvet is my FAVOURITE. Maybe thats why i have memory issues. Oh oh! Did you know that if you consume too much sugar, it gives you memory issues

And diabetes

Reminds me of the time I used to sometimes eat sugar because why not? And ice. I liked chewing on ice. And I used to read so much as a baby. And zooooooooooom everywhere. I used to have a cycle and it was pink and white and so cute and I used to take it everywhere

Sometimes I feel like rapunzel. Cause ivory tower, yk? Like, my dad never let's me leave the house after 10 and says I'm not allowed to exit the apartment floor n stuff, and I used to make up little songs about leaving and seeing the world n stuff, I don't so that anymore though. I gave up on that dream. But I still wanna leave yk?

Anyway

SPIDERS

SPIDERS ARE SOSOSOSO CUTE. LIKE ONE TIME I SAW A SPIDER ON MY MED KIT (I CAN WRAP BANDAGES DID YA KNOW THAT???) AND I LOOKED IN ITS TINY EYES AND WE HAD A STARING CONTEST AND THEN IT JUMPED AWAY AND I SAID BYE BYE

And the one time I was sitting on a sofa and looked at the arm of the sofa and saw a tiny spider there and we maintained eye contact for like 4 seconds before it jumped off the arm and onto the floor and lay there unmoving and I laughed while crying. Reminded me of the time when I tried to climb a tree in muree that was on a mountain and nearly fell off both the tree and mountain.

MY FRIEND JUST TEXTED ME TEHEHEHEHEHE

Shes bullying me with uwus. I'm not gonna open her chat >:(

My best friend is actually sososososo cool and I love her sm. I've known her for 3 years and she can actually make me laugh genuinely. Props to her. That's hard to do. And shes sososososo pretty and bossy makes me giggle and I feel so happy, she reminds me of Sunflowers. I tell her so many stories like the time I ate something I shouldn't have and almost got lost in the woods at the dead of night behind the farmhouse we were visiting. And she's a doctor and she's sososososo cool

AND SHE KNOWS MY FAVOURITE SONG AND COLOR AND FOOD AND SHE LIKES MY DESSERT

You say you love me. You say I'm your friend. WHAT'S MY FAVOURITE SONG, YOU WEENIE.

Weenie

Hehe

I gave her a watch and she wore it. I almost cried

I saw a bird yesterday. My best friend hates crows. So I always chase them off for her.

I miss the humming birds near our house. They were pretty. I'm sleepy. And I'm also thinking. Well, not really. Thinking is wierd. Because when you start thinking you start thinking about everything. Like, how do we know the big bang happened when none of us were alive when it happened and how do we know an alternate reality doesn't exist, because maybe it exists, and maybe aliens exist too, because who are we to conclude that aliens don't exist? Because we are literally smaller than specks as compared to this entire universe and mermaids could exist too, because we've py explored 5% of the entirety of the oceans and yeye

You ever think about how 'crises' sounds like 'cry sis'? Because I do, because I cry. Now im thinking about Lobelias and how to murder my English teacher. I want to experiment on her. What will happen if I inject glitter into her veins? Or glue? Or glitter glue? Maybe give her tiny heart attacks by injecting small doses of air into her veins. Would that work?

Maybe i can cook up her remains and shit and give it to the other people I hate

Assign me a Taylor Swift song

I like The Prophecy from TTPD. I relate

Im so selfish it's funny

I like bows. Especially blood red ones. Did you know my favourite color is blood red?

This talk post is longer than most fics you've read hehehehe

I still don't know what a loubtine is. How do you spell it? Louboutine? Lobetine? WHAT IS IT

Louboutine.

Idk I give up.

Alina thinks I'm cute. I am so not. I am evil. Safa (my best friend) agrees with Alina (the music girl) and I have to defend myself everytime. I am not cute. I am evil. I ONCE STOLE BACK MY ERASER FROM A GIRL WHO STOLE MY PINK ERASER IS THAT NOT EVIL ENOUGH FOR YOU????

I STOLE A FLOWER TOO. AND CANDY. AND NOODLES FROM MY BROTHER.

Safa's younger sister once gave me a flower and a sketchbook. I drew stuff in it. I want to draw Edinburgh. Paint it, I mean. This post is very messy.

Cosmo Sheldrake by Come Along is stuck in my head rn

And chase altantic songs.

Idk the name of that one song that goes in a way I can't describe

I just noticed I wrote the cosmo Sheldrake song wrong

But im not gonna go back to fix it cause this is a messy post and I like it

I meant Come Along by Cosmo Sheldrake

Cool song.

Reminds me of the fae.

Now im thinking about Cassian. Why not? He's my blorbo. He's also my favourite. And his cousin Zinnia is sososososo pretty and theyre as close as siblings. I'm gonna draw them when I get an iPad (even tho I'm a Samsung girlie but I need procreate)

I just remembered my cult. It was called the Cat Cult. I was the leader. It was all just cats except me and one of my friends. We plotted to take over the world. I wonder how that fat orange cat is doing now

Fuck math, do meth.

Sometimes I wonder if there's someone out there who's gonna listen to me yap for hours on end and love it. A girl can only dream.

Ngl I'd rock an enemies to lovers trope. That or I'd completely flop. No in between. Cause I'd call him the weirdest names that he wouldn't even understand like 'frostingless cupcake' or 'dry ass oatmeal' or a weenie.

Weenie

Hehe

Did i say that before?

I have brown eyes.

I wanna be pretty so bad

Am i pretty? Kind of

Im not gonna call myself ugly. I'm not ugly >:(

Calling people darling or love is so fun

How are you darling?

I am good

I am a good babie

I gave chicken to a cat today

And saw a birb

And a tree

And a cloud

And i ate icecream

I am sleppy

Goodnight, ma belle

This is not even a rant

It's just me rambling

[sstarlitseass]

You know what's been on my mind for a while? In the story of Snow White, the Evil Queen was considered the fairest of them all until Snow White became fairer, that's what kick-starts the plot, the Queen is jealous Snow White is now the fairest, so in Ever After High, it really should be Raven who is considered the fairest of them all, not Apple. In order for them to truly live their destinies and follow their story, Raven would have to become the fairest at one point, and this is never addressed in the show, aside from maybe in Dragon Games where Raven becomes more popular, but it's not really put in the context of their story, does Apple even realize that part of the story? What would she do if she just woke up one day and her mirror said Raven was the fairest? Another funny thing to note, Apple is the one who talks to her magic mirror and asks it who's the fairest, but in Snow White, that's what the Evil Queen does, I've had this idea for a while now for a reverse destiny AU that revolves around this: one day, Apple talks to her mirror and it says Raven is the fairest, Apple doesn't realize this aligns with her story and thinks Raven is trying to steal her destiny, so in a fit of jealously she decides to poison Raven with a poisoned apple, believing it would get rid of her forever as she doesn't think anyone could love, in her words, "an evil destiny stealer that nearly made everyone go poof"

oh my god? that's one of the best things I've ever heard oh my god? I didn't even think about that part of the story ngl. if you think about it in another way that could so back up the birth swap of the two theory as well. while i don't think Apple could do that actually, as per her breaking the mirror was a total accident and then EQ peer pressured her afterwards, that would be so fun to read/write about. Evil Apple is suuuuch a fun concept. I kinda wanna write that out but I'm not a writer at all, so if anyone sees this and they do write it I am *begging* you send it to me. I lived for the personality swap episode and seeing evil apple, she's so silly and could do SO much damage. I love this sm. I wonder if she would poison her with an apple too, or if it would be something else! idk that's so cool though.

[thevampiremarie]

This is sort of off-topic, but I found it very ironic that Desire of all people slut-shamed Reader for basically getting pregnant out of wedlock. They're the literal personification of sluttiness! Therefore, if they insulted her, they pretty much insulted themselves/their own function. Just to be clear, I do not think having consensual one-night stands makes anyone a slut. In fact, I don't even think there's such thing as a slut since sex is a natural human urge for some people.

Hi, thanks for the ask!

When Desire was slutshaming Reader to her face, they were specifically playing on her fears that she was only a body to Morpheus and not anything more important. That horrible nightmare she had was very much her fears of being reduced down to a womb and imprisoned within her body, and Desire was working with that. Also ofc just outright insulting her specifically in whatever way they could. When talking to Morpheus, they went this route to trivialize his attraction/relationship to Reader and insult him. Desire also I think just doesn’t understand why Morpheus is so worked up about one human. What can she provide that is causing such a huge change in their brother? Desire knows about Orpheus, so to them the only explanation is that Morpheus is trying to replace his son and needs a womb to do it.

But Desire’s interactions with Reader + Morpheus carry heavy overtones of “us (gods/Endless/immortals) vs them (mortals/humans)”. Desire is just the sort of Endless who would shame mortals for being slutty and blame them for what Desire makes them do because Desire doesn’t view mortals as equals. Just animals that obey Desire and the other Endless. Why would Morpheus turn his back on his family and only equals to consort with an animal subject to the whims of their power?

I worked a lot with developing Desire’s character in my head and the multilayered way they would approach both Reader and Dream, and the very subtle ways they would try to cut them down.

Thank you sm for the ask, I literally love answering them and could talk about this story forever!!!

[slytherinshua]

Physically, you survived. Mentally, that's a different story lol. I honestly don't think I could survive. He definitely belongs centre stage oh my goodness. I am so glad that he decided to pursue music, I was listening to his solo album this afternoon and oh my goodness. It was amazing. It felt like a hug, I don't know any better way to describe that lol

Oh I'll definitely check out discord then! I will take any Lucy content ahaha. What did you think of the set list though? Did you get to hear everything you wanted?

I definitely want to listen to Hyunsang's solo stuff! I don't know much about Hoppipolla in general, but I would highly recommend their music. I find it so relaxing to listen to, or I'll put it on when I want to listen to music but need to concentrate on a task (I listened to a lot of their stuff and Laufey while doing my dissertation lol). I would highly recommend Day6 or N.Flying if you've never listened to them. I absolutely love Young K from Day6's voice, I could go on all day about how beautiful he sounds ahaha. N.flying have some really goofy songs which are so catchy (my introduction to them was if BSS were a song by a band, they would be Hot Potato by N.Flying and honestly I agree)

Ahaha I'm glad you've enjoyed talking to me (I've enjoyed talking to you too!!)

right 😭 but even physically ngl i was wrecked LIKE MY LEGS WERE SORE EVEN BEFORE SOUNDCHECK STARTED AND THEN IT JUST GOT WORSE 😭😭 my neck and arms and like basically everywhere was so ruined by the end of the concert BUT IT WAS WORTH IT 100%. his solo album is soooo comforting oh my god :( i love everything sangyeop does i could listen to his voice forever

yeahh there are some lucy servers maybe you can find some lucy friends!! and we can also talk more on there since im more active!! (my discord is on my carrd if u click on the discord icon)

omg if you're gonna get into hyunsang's music you need to listen to burning sunset, time and trace, snowflake, 3108, and dawn (and gone tonight... and late night movie... and close... and lighthouse ahem) <33 he makes such emo/rock music its such a vibe :( and his voice is literally unreal!! his entire discography is amazing tho (including his osts!!) <3

i love day6 and n.flying omg i can't wait for the new nflying song <33 and it's not too long until the other members are gonna be back from the military!! dongsung comes back on my birthday 🥹🥹🥹 who's your bias in those groups? for me its wonpil and hweseung <3 and i love young k sm as well he's always doing things with lucy or ha hyunsang and i love all the interactions so much he's so sweet and his voice is incredible (he has a cover with lucy and another with hyunsang i think) HOT POTATO IS SO PERFECT TO DESCRIBE BSS LMAO PLS IT ALWAYS MAKES ME GIGGLE WHEN I REMEMBER THAT THEY ACTUALLY HAD POTATOES FOR LIGHTSTICKS DURING THAT PROMOTION 😭😭😭

[oathofkaslana]

gay hi3 moments from the top of my head (some details inaccurate) also some of these are awful and i hate them ok i need it to be known i dont like all of these.

kiana counting down how long it’s been since she’s seen mei to the minute.

the “i gain the power of 100 men when mei’s around!”

bronya seele kiss in azure waters where seele goes "i gave you my first kiss sm sm" and im pretty sure makes her promise to give one to her when they reunite

FUCK. COOKING W VALKS MANHUA WHERE SEELE GOES "the sea is so beautiful i feel like i could stare at it forever" AND BRONYA GOES "duh because the water is azure blue. just like your eyes" AND GOES LIKE AN INCH IN HER FACE.

i feel like i have to put everything in azure waters oh my god i feel sick i miss them so much.

kiana licking mei’s wound in escape from nagazora

kiana and mei in a hot spring and kiana touching mei’s boobs saying she’s been wanting to. i think also in escape from nagazora.

kiana getting unnecessarily jealous over bronya whenever mei shows her any attention

bronseele ad where bronya complains about having her license revoked and seele going “good! now i know you’re not picking up other girls”

lament of the fallen. (COME ON. COMPARED TO EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE WORLD, YOU ARE MORE IMPORTANT????)

kiana and mei being compared to a canonical m/f couple, owl and ana.

shakespeare mentions how it’s interesting to see real couples play a part and one of the couples being bianka and rita in durandal’s visual novel.

speaking of that play. biankas cgaracter makes a line about having sex w his wife (played by rita) and rita teases bianka about wanting it afterwards and bianka blushes

biankas one birthday cutscene where the narrator was talking abt how there’s this feeling she can’t put into words and how captivated she is by rita’s radiant smile ← GET A ROOM!!!!!

elysia calling her fight w mei a first date

eden saying that forever being apart of elysia makes her happy because its the most romantic ending

mei saying her favorite colors are orange and red (kiana and her's key colors)

mei coming back to the elysian realm after briefly talking to kiana and eden and elysia both notice how much happier she is and elysia goes "tell me about her" (HER.)

elysia voice. i like pretty girls.

every single elysia and kiana interaction in ch 34 idc if its mei's dream ("im so weak for pretty girls like kiana" "unless kiana prefers something more bold like purring in my arms" <- WHAT IS WRONG W HER!!!!!!!!!!!!)

natasha intenbtionally taking her hood off after mei told her that elysia says she doesnt meet natasha bc of her hood

elymei horn scene.

mei dreaming about having a japanese wedding with kiana.

kiamei matching rings named after chinese numbers symbolic of love that were given out for white day.

kiamei stigmata showing them getting married that was given out for valentines day.

reburn kiss where kiana kisses mei's battered mech while crying after i love you in german flashes on screen.

kiana going "this treasure called love" and immediately getting a text from mei.

"this is a story about love it will end with love" as kiana and mei walk with each other past durandal and rita to meet with bronya whos with seele AS CANON IN D STARTS PLAYING. YK THE FUCKING MARRIAGE CEREMONY SONG.

SAKUKALLEN KISS IN COOKING WITH VALKYRIES

theresa thinking sakura (a woman) kissed her and going "wait! im not like kiana and mei!"

kallen voice "the herrscher girl is innocent and i am in love with her"

^upon learning that kiana blushing and going "theres onthing wrong with falling in love with a herrscher!" while thinking of mei

moon shadow where kiana's heart starts racing bc she thinks fu hua's fallen in love with her and the wlw symbol is drawn behind her as she blushes and says "ive given my body and soul to mei but--"

fu hua later being teased by a coworker who suggested that hua likes kiana

sakukallen "love at first sight" line in sakura samsara

HELP THAT ONE EVENT WHERE VELIONA SLAMS BRONYA ONTO A WALL TO INTIMIDATE HER AND BRONYAS BLUSHING AND AS VELI'S YELLING AT HER, EINSTEIN WALKS OUT, SEES THEM, AND GOES, "sorry for interrupting, have fun"

also in that same event, bronya blushing and avoiding seele the next day and going "sorry bronya cant forget because thats a precious memory for bronya"

susannah fawning over durandal, rita, and sushang

susannah talking about how pretty sushang is and how she likes her voice i hate them oh my god susannah get up

tesla being jealous of welt joyce when ein teasingly gives him special attention in the visual novel

tesla getting jealous when planck (i think) hugs ein tightly and kisses ein on the head

tesla edison fingering joke after edison sniffs her neck.

bronya's bridge interactions w seele. my god i love them so mcuh.

sakura and kallen having heart reactions when you put them in bed next to each other

sakukallen "yae sakura shall fade, beloved, your kin shall live. in the far east 500 years ago where sakura blossoms bloom, yae sakura waits for her one true love"

gratitude arc where kallen loves sakura so much that protecting sakura becomes a part of the oath she genetically passes on to theresa

the 4koma on the sight where kiana and mei are told to get a room, apply for a marriage certificate(? i think), and have heart eyes towards each other while the wlw signs are behind them

kiana voice "this has nothing to do with me going lesbo!!!"

4koma kiana voice "im a lesbian everyone knows that"

elysia and aponia's "girl games"??????????? <- on thin ice but cmon no way that wasnt an innuendo

elysia's interaction w HoO mei where she talks about wanting to touch a particular thing but gets cut off by mei telling her she cant touch her horns again (SHE DOES NOT HAVE HORNS IN HER HoO SUIT)

kiana smiling when she sees mei's boobs in the anniversary vlog short thing.

the shenzhou island event where kiana points a camera at mei's boobs and goes "hehe mei is so pretty"

durarita matching earrings in their matching battlesuits

and ok im blanking now yay this is definitely not all when i say off the top of my head i really mean off the top of my head.

[divorcingjimmatthews]

season 2 finale thoughts (spoilers!!)

JADE

OK so first things first—i love him sm T_T seeing julie in danger really affected him and he went into the fucking tunnels for her ??? NO ONE is allowed to call this guy selfish anymore okay. now that being said

that's NOT tom!!!! and that's not abby!!!! and that wasn't khatri!!!!!! i hope the small "conversation" (boyd left him on read lmao) on the porch is the start of some jade and boyd plot thread for s3 because they need to talk about this. i wonder if more people will start seeing dead people in s3? i wonder if jade will see tobey...

anyway those visions are clearly trying to manipulate them. the khatri and tom ones alone could pass as neutral but the abby one this episode? hell no!! the vision was trying to convince boyd that the kind thing to do was to let them die 💀💀💀 i wonder if this is also what christopher saw?

and wtf was up with the angkhooey kids! the fuck were they doing in the tunnels! tabitha already saw one of them down there at the beginning of the season but it's really interesting that jade saw the same thing tabitha saw... that's definitely new! he also confirmed that his visions were showing him real things when he touched the ventriloquist doll... which we already knew, but what does that say about the soldiers? all the stuff about the stories... much to think about there 🤔

anyway. enough praise and lore now it's time to scold yes SCOLD this man for going down there ALONE !!! helloooo visions people you should not be going places on your own that's like seeing things 101 i should know about that. final thought: hilarious how jade spends time with tabby and is now seeing the kids, spends 5 minutes with boyd and is now seeing dead people... he keeps catching stuff, he's an empath fr

TABITHA

ok let me start by saying i think this is possibly the best direction they could've gone with the character development on the show. the GAPING HOLE that tabby's absence is going to leave???? for her children and most importantly for jim since he's lately been making an enemy of pretty much everyone else? she's the only one that's really gotten through both victor and jade too... her going missing is going to be so fucking palpable

i posted a theory that jade might be getting out of fromville in the finale right after watching ep9 because i figured that if someone had the resources to do anything from the outside it would be jade with his money and access to tech, but i guess my love for jade was just blinding me because this makes a lot more narrative sense

i've been seeing people speculate that tabitha is going to find eloise and i'm suscribing to that. she's got the lunchbox to prove she knew victor in case eloise lost her memory or something—but i have no idea how the two of them might be able to do anything. it's not gonna be easy

we can't even jump to the conclusion that eloise actually made it out. i think she did make it to the tower (victor's mom probably got her in the tree before the creatures got her) but the glass wasn't broken before the biw pushed tabby so i see no proof that anyone else walked the same steps all the way through before her

i can't stress this enough btw i need —need— jim and jade to become friends like jim's gonna have no choice but to lean on people outside of his family now and his recent antics got a lot of people pretty upset. jim and jade have a lot in common including caring for tabby so i can see them teaming up to look for her at the very least. jim's gonna have to accept victor now whether he likes it or not and thank god for mama liu because without her i think all three of these men would be fucked and i mean it. can they even cook i don't think so

i could talk about these dynamics literally forever (and i will) but now its time to move on to the next

REGGIE

ngl i kind of get him like no one was treating him like they would've treated a main character after such a devastating event i can kind of see why he snapped all things considered. he was right to blame boyd too but look at least boyd was trying, boyd taking on his gambles is what got them the talismans and what got a nightmare creature dead, he's one fucking man okay give him a break

i was TERRIFIED during the wedding scene it was so beautiful (the vows really got to me) but i kept expecting gunshots to interrupt it like i legit thought reggie was gonna somehow manage to kill everyone downstairs or a bunch of people at least. thank GOD he was dumb enough to go for boyd first that's like going straight for the boss in a videogame

also whats with the throat slicing in this show istg everyone here dies of a sliced throat lmaooo is it really that easy to kill someone or to get killed? unsettling. i'm gonna start wearing a neck brace everywhere. they should sell plate armor chokers i'd get one

FINAL THOUGHTS

(EDIT: deleting the bit i wrote on kenny and kristi because regardless of how i feel about their situation as a sapphic woman i don't want to add to the anti-mari/kristi hate going around rn. i want to make it clear that i love both kristi and marielle individually and as a couple and nothing i say about the kenny/kristi situation is meant to imply that kristi should not be prioritizing marielle. this is a serious topic and i'm really sorry that i've been shitposting about it carelessly as if the larger context didn't matter when it does <\3)