#GO READ THIS FIC NOW. RIGHT NOW. YALL WHO HAVEN'T READ IT HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT WHAT'S IN THERE

[star-ar512]

piano room in B7, s-23 sierpinski

[rui-xyz]

hii im from wattpad and i want to request :

Rui x reader (reader is afab), fsmut ig ?? both college students nd they both wanted to start a project but ended up.. yk 😭

HIHI WELCOME!! Honestly this ask is my entire rui sequel fic on wattpad (wink wink go read it and the prequel anyone who hasn't)

Anyway enough talking, let's just get into it ;)

⭒Synopsis: ^^

⭒Warnings: NSFW,

⭒Setting: College, so yall are anywhere from 18-22 or so

⭒Notes: AHH IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER TO GET OUT

"Alright, we have everything we need! I think..." You gazed over the messy pile of mechanic bits strewn across the floor, your boyfriend sitting in the middle.

"This should be all I need," he smiled up at you from the floor.

"Great! Then, let's get to work!" You hopped over onto your bed, starting to look through the brainstorming notes for just what kind of bot you'd use for this project.

That was over half an hour ago. So far, you had done nothing but add maybe 3 more things to your notes, and ramble endlessly. You suddenly stopped yourself mid-sentence, shaking your head in frustration.

"Noo, Rui, we're on another tangent..."

"Sorry, I knew this time, it just seemed like something you really enjoy talking about."

"Thank you, Sweetheart, but now's not the time to indulge my scatterbrain." You sighed, flopping back on the bed. "I still have no idea what this bot is even gonna do, let alone look like..."

"You have plenty of ideas down, I suppose it's just choosing that's the hard part."

"Are you sure the animated hologram is off the table?"

"That would take several months of research and work. You need this done by the end of the week."

You groaned and sat back up, slipping off your bed and leaning down over Rui's mess to cup his face and nuzzle his nose. "Thank goodness I have my pretty genius boy to help."

He chuckled softly, going along with your affection before standing up to stretch his legs. "I'll have you know, I didn't procrastinate on my homework this time, just to make sure it was done for when you get home."

You cooed, thanking him with a hug as he stepped out of his sea of silvers and metal. "Y'know, maybe a snack will help get us on track?"

"I don't think a snack is going to help you focus better."

"Awe, c'mon, we won't know til we try, right?" As you started walking out from your bedroom to the kitchen, you were tugged back by your shirt before the door closed in front of you.

"I know something that'll help."

"Hmn? And what would that be?"

Suddenly, you felt Rui pick you up and toss you onto your bed, jumping on you immediately after. He held himself up, hovering above you with a smirk on his face.

"If history repeats itself, this'll probably help out," he purred, before leaning down to start kissing and licking up and down your neck. You shuddered slightly.

"W-what in the world makes you think this is the solution?"

"You haven't noticed? You do much better work when you're... we'll say... relieved."

"What evidence is there of that?" You chuckled, resting your hands on his shoulders.

"I've witnessed it a time or two. Now, enough talking. That's what got us here in the first place."

You wanted to inquire some more, but refrained, instead just simply letting your breath shake with every exhale as Rui soaked your neck with growing impatience.

He wasted no time in slipping his hands under your shirt and pulling it up your body. His hands found their way to your sides, gripping and rubbing over your ribs, down to your hips. His mouth left your neck and pressed against yours, tongue slipping past your lips within seconds.

You kicked your legs up over his hips, squeezing his waist between your knees. He carefully pulled his face away from your kiss, smiling down at you darkly.

"Let's get this over with quickly, yeah? We shouldn't take too long when we have work to do."

"Yeah, you're right..."

His hands tugged your shirt all the way off, tossing it aside dismissively and going for your pants. Then his pants came off. Meanwhile, you tugged off his shirt, which he had neglected due to time. His leg pressed up between your legs so you could grind against it as your tongues licked together with hunger.

He felt over your body, squeezing roughly, grabbing at his favorite parts of you and feeling your soft, plush skin under his fingers. Fuck, were you irresistible, even with his eyes closed.

With the softest groan of frustration and impatience, he stuffed his face into your neck and shoved hastily at his all too tight pants. He sighed at the freedom once they were finally off, and paused before he made for his boxers. Rui lifted himself up and gave you a devilish look.

"Is my Darling ready for me?"

You let out a shuddering breath as his hand trailed down your stomach, dipping into your underwear and feeling across your folds. Just how easily his fingers slid told you the answer to his question. His smirk widened.

"Good."

With that, his fingers hooked into the leg holes and started tugging them down your thighs. Once they were off and discarded with all the rest of your clothing, you suddenly felt two of his fingers slide into you embarrassingly easily. You tensed, gasping, but huffed at the amused look on his face.

"I thought you said we shouldn't waste any time?"

"I wouldn't call this a waste. You aren't seriously asking me to just ram into you without a little preparation, are you?" He gave you a pouty look, to which you rolled your eyes and let him continue, stretching you out. Once he pulled his fingers out of you, sucking them clean before they wrapped around your hip, you mentally prepared yourself for what came next.

"Ready?"

"Yeah."

He propped your legs up onto his hips and carefully slid into you. You let out a shaky breath as each inch slid in, filling you up how he always did. He groaned out happily, smiling as his lashes fluttered.

"Mmh, yeah... that's it." Rui sighed as he leaned down, pressing his chest against yours. His arms slipped under your shoulder blades and grabbed your shoulders. He rubbed his cheek against yours and placed a few kisses across it, grinning all the while. "I love you... Want me to start yet?"

You wiggled your hips slightly, listening to his breath hitch. Once you were fairly sure your insides had adjusted, you leaned back and relaxed, then nodded your head.

"Yeah, you can start."

"Okay, Honey," he sighed happily, then pressed his lips to yours. He started to pull back, then thrust back in slowly, breaths uneven. Your own breath was shallow as you kissed him, feeling how gentle and slow his movements were starting out. He continued at that same pace for a while, then pulled away from your lips to catch his breath as his hips began to speed up.

The feeling of his cock brushing against your inner walls and his tip hitting so deep in you gave you a wave of goosebumps, how it usually did. A few soft moans started to leave your lips as your head fell back against the pillows. Your vision was blurry with pleasure, but you could see as Rui looked over your face, his muscles tensing as a moan escaped him. He leaned back down, groaning softly as he shoved his face into the nape of your neck and started to speed up more.

It felt glorious, the pleasure making your brows furrow and eyes roll back. Your hands gripped onto his back, and with every moan of his that sounded next to your ear, you felt your insides grow hotter, until a knot started to form in your stomach. The most you could do was squeal out Rui's name, but in response, he sped up to a pace that had you wailing with pleasure.

You could feel your finale quickly approaching, but it's not like you could muster the ability to warn him, especially when his mouth met yours again and your moans mixed together. As you reached the edge of bliss, all you could manage was a frantic shove to Rui's shoulder, before your back arched and you cried out. He immediately slowed down, now back to focusing on his depth as his orgasm also neared. You clenched around him as you soaked his cock with your release, and those sweet sounds you were making made his cock more solid than stone. Every second his orgasm neared, it felt like you were driving him more and more crazy. He could just barely sense himself getting louder as he kept slamming deep into you, until his pleasure peaked and he let out a long, shuddering moan as he released inside you. You shuddered, yet another wave of goosebumps raising over your body. As his cum gushed into you, he held you tight, squeezing you with euphoria. When the feeling finally subsided, his whole body relaxed, almost going limp above you. He let out a sigh and started catching his breath at about the same pace you were.

The two of you spent a couple moments just basking in the relaxing, post-orgasmic afterglow, before Rui dropped his head back down to your shoulder, shifting slightly to get comfortable.

"Don't fall asleep," you warned with a chuckle.

"I know, I know. We still have work to do."

His words made you pause, before you groaned. "Awe, fuck."

[silverstonesainz-archive]

favorite fics & other good things ↳ my guilty pleasure reads, social media edits, & favorite people

wanted to compile a list of all my favorite reads, in case yall needed something new to look at. (but also if you follow me, you probably follow all my favs and see all their works anyways). this also a cute little post to show appreciation to my fellow writers/creators on here bc...... it's kind of rough out here and i just wanna give a little love. making this also made me realize i read fics from the same rotation of people so if you have fic recs, do send them my way! but without further ado, here we go!

+ long fics

the devil in disguise by @ricc3rodeo [daniel ricciardo x fem!oc] this can't come as shock to yall. if you haven't read this series then you need to RIGHT now. q is a true & honest to god wench for this series but i love it so much. and i love sam so much. and i love HER so much

moonlight by @vamossainz55 [carlos sainz x fem!reader] another great carlos fic & im not just saying that bc i love niks. the plot is CHEF'S KISS so pls read it is 10/10. (note: the link is to the latest chapter, not a masterlist!)

dogs of war by @schuvries [charles leclerc x fem!reader] spirit is by far one of my favorite writers and people on this hellsite. she has such a way with words and i wanna be here when i grow up. read any and all her works you will never be disappointed.

august rush by @harley-sunday [carlos sainz x fem!reader] the softness, the domesticity, the friends to lovers. so fucking good. easily my favorite fics on this sight.

+ one-shots

to live a lifetime with you by @formulabear [charles leclerc x fem!reader] i remember reading this and feeling every ounce of emotion from it. so good. if you haven't read this then you need to right freaking NOW.

listen up / my dear by @oyesmendes [daniel ricciardo x fem!reader] this one made me feel warm and fuzzy inside. gotta love me some danny ric!!!

though i have to travel far, remember me by schuvries [daniel ricciardo x gn!reader] spirit absolutely tore me apart with this one. ripped me to shreds. so fucking good.

said something stupid, instead of 'i love you.' by @absolutelynotmate [charles leclerc x fem!reader] 27k words of delectable writing. take a seat, drink some coffee, & enjoy the ride of emotions this fic brings

brought me here by @leclsrc [carlos sainz x fem!reader] auds is the only person who can make me cry over oranges. this makes me so ill (but in the best way) and makes me fall for carlos even more.

has yet to pass by leclsrc [carlos sainz x fem!reader] the angsty?? the slow burn?? the ending. you have to read it. HAVE TO.

the 1 by @lxclerc [daniel ricciardo x fem!reader] i think of this fic often. this also tore me to shred in the best way. lex is also one of the best writes yall should read her entire masterlist actually.

+ blurbs

snowflakes by absolutelynotmate [carlos sainz] wanna be in the snow with carlos :(

carousel by absolutelynotmate [carlos sainz] i also want to have his baby

overly sincere by leclsrc [charles leclerc] auds is sick for this one

yellow? by schuvries [carlos sainz] the idea of carlos calling me his "hielo" makes me rabid

frosting by @diorleclerc [carlos sainz / 18+] this... this makes me feral. i want this.

13:44 by formulabear [carlos sainz] the softness of this makes me want to swallow my pillow. i want this man so bad

mick + choking by @whorekneecentral [mick schumacher / 18+] this isn't a blurb so much as it is a brainrot post but it is important to me i include this on the list. i want mick so so so so bad.

+ social media aus

tiktoked / sneaky by leclsrc [carlos sainz] my guilty pleasure au. fuck this is my dream. actually auds got the texts from my phone(real)

a bet is a bet by absolutelynotmate [charles leclerc] this. chef's kiss. the work put into these aus. fuck my wife is PHENOMENAL.

[bebe-writes-stuff]

I made a

Tokyo Rev prompt

Bluelock prompt

MHA prompt

-- Go read them!! JJK is next, obviously, like how could I even forget. I gotta compensate yall for the amount of trauma Gege is giving yall. MY MAN IS GONE, GEGE, I HATE YOU. -- Ima tell yall right now, this fanfic has absolutely no fucking relation to the current timeline of this tragic asf anime. okAy?-- Anyway this prompt,

For this story I wanted a specific theme and certain character development for Y/n, (I literally use what I learn from my English class to write these mfing stories...embarrassing)

At the beginning, Y/n, leads a reserved and quiet life not because she is shy but she just finds it better not to associate with other people. Because she possesses the ability to feel and perceive the true emotions of others. This ability makes her more of an observer than a talker, She can feel peoples Anger, Sadness, Fear, Anxiety, Guilt, Shame, Jealousy, Envy, Disgust, Frustration, Loneliness, Despair, Regret, Resentment, Insecurity, All of it. but because those people's emotions weren't long term and not intense, Y/n couldn't see curses (for now) but deep within her soul, she knew something evil was around. So one day, something tragic happens, I have decided what yet. But because this certain event caused very intense negative emotions that Y/n could feel, it was like a veil had been removed from her eyes and she started seeing curses. It was like a nightmare at first, the constant horrifying creatures she'd run into. but for some reason, they would never attack her, in fact they'd take off and run away any place she was near. which was strange because for a curse to be frightened something has to have an even greater cursed energy which is exactly the case with Y/n. She hasn't realized yet but every time Y/n felt someone's negative emotion, it transferred to her. As a result causing her to have an immense amount of cursed energy, it's so great that even jujutsu sorcerers and the higher up can sense it from miles away, without even understanding who or what this cursed energy was coming from they decided to execute it as soon as they get hold on it, the only issue was they couldn't place where this cursed energy was coming from. It was like a switch, sometimes it was so intense and sometimes there was absolutely no trace of it. but what the higher ups don't know, Gojo (daddy) has already traced y/ns location and sent a certain 3 students to supervise and watch her, but that doesn't go unnoticed by her which she's pretty quick to notice her pursuers and doesn't take long to confront them. also I still haven't decided a cursed technique for her...Womp Womp

--Oml idk if this made any sense, for some reason when I have an idea I can't write 100% of what I want, ughhhh, enjoy, and let me know if you guys want this fic--

[phoebe-delia]

Prompt

For @drarrymicrofic prompt: prompt. I'm doing something a little different here. I hope yall enjoy this. It's self-insert, technically, but in a way I think could be fun. We're going meta, folks! Rated M!

I put my laptop aside and thunked my head against the couch cushion. "This is useless."

"What is?" Harry sat down next to me, sipping from his cup of water and setting it down on the coffee table.

I turned to look at him. "This fic. I can't think of a prompt."

"Have you checked the—"

"Yes, I checked the microfic prompts. They're all great but I've already done a lot of them and the others haven't sparked anything specific yet." I narrowed my eyes at him. "Why can't you and Draco do something interesting for me to write about?"

Harry raised an eyebrow. "Why can't you come up with something interesting for us to do?"

"Like each other!" Draco called as he walked in from the next room. Harry snickered as Draco approached us and sat next to Harry on the couch.

I rolled my eyes. "Draco, for the last time, I'm not interested in writing smut. As much as I might love to read it, and adore my writer friends who do, it just doesn't inspire me creatively."

"Mmm but we get pretty inspired, don't we, Potter?" Draco took Harry's chin in his hand and brought their lips close.

"We do," Harry murmured, leaning in and kissing Draco.

I wrinkled my nose. "Can you not? Or at least do that in another room? I'm trying to be inspired to write something about you two idiots and your making out isn't helping."

Draco rolled his eyes. "Oh as if you don't love it. But—fine. We shall delay our mindblowing sex in order to help you pay appropriate homage to our relationship."

"How generous," I said dryly. "Now help me!"

Harry pursed his lips. "Have you tried listening to music?"

"Yeah, but all the songs I listened to I've either done already, or didn't really hit me right," I said. "Can't you two give me ideas? Just—give me words or short phrases that you might like to see me write about for you."

"What makes you think we know?" Harry asked. "You're the writer!"

"Phoebe, and I say this with all due respect," Draco drawled. "As both a manifestation of your writer's block and one of your—what's the word? Blob?"

"Blorbo," I said, smiling amusedly.

"Yes, that," Draco said waiving a hand at me. "What a ridiculous term, but anywho. As a beloved blorbo, I must remind you that you cannot force a good story. Inspiration strikes when it comes, and neither Harry nor I can tell you what to write. We are yours to place in infinite scenarios, but seeing as we exist entirely within your own mind, we are unfortunately no more informed about writing prompts than you are."

I narrowed my eyes again. "You're right, but entirely unhelpful."

Draco smirked. "I'd call that a job well done. Anyway, I'm bored of this. Harry, darling, care for a shag?"

Harry's eyes lit up. He nodded. "Let's go," he said, letting Draco pull him to his feet. They jogged toward their shared bedroom. "Good luck with the writing, Phoebe!" Harry called over his shoulder before they slammed the door.

I cringed and cast the strongest silencing spell I knew at the door. I picked up my laptop. "Useless," I muttered, and refreshed Tumblr once more.

[fortunesfavours]

time travel in ten - sequential narrative collage piece done for my class, Artifact.

ramblings below the cut for those interested in the process/life update for friends who have noticed i've been gone

right lmao. i had two weeks to do this project and had a completely different idea that i just could not get myself to be excited about. emailed my prof in desperation, but it being like 10 pm meant that she was not about to respond. within 30 minutes, as it goes, i got struck with divine inspiration by whatever force of nature governs procrastination-induced genius, and i promptly spent the next 12 waking hours non-stop working on this.

my class, artifact, is a requirement for the foundation year at the college i attend. it centers around time-based media, ranging from the sequential illustration here to video later in the semester, and a bunch of other projects designed to get us thinking in 4d. artifact is the theme of the class - my peers are doing the same projects under a variety of different themes (tragically, haunting filled up too quickly and i missed out on enrollment in that one).

our first project was designing an artifact and doing a write-up of the story behind it. the girl to my left made beaded spiders members of a fictional cult carried. the guy across from me made an amulet of a long-dead god. you get the vibes. mine, which I still need to take professional photos of, is a pocketwatch that lets you time travel. cause, yknow. i'm me. it was gonna be about time travel.

i had originally intended to do a bunch of drawings of the watch's owner, building out her backstory and the world she lives in, and explaining why the watch exists,,,, then i couldn't bring myself to pick up the stylus. I just can't seem to find the energy for my usual digital art (sorry friends i miss yall i'm still here i swear).

here's the bit about my life so feel free to stop reading if you just care about the art 👍

I haven't drawn fanart or my ocs in months now, since last semester, and I miss it a whole bunch but right now that creative energy just. is not happening. i don't plan on abandoning it forever by any means, but p much everything i have is going towards school right now. sad as that is, i'm having so much fun, and i'm so proud of the technical improvements i've made. I've got so many things i want to create, mostly for my ocs. i still love crit role, but i've fallen of campaign three. i don't have the time, and the story hasn't been engaging me for a bit.

i've been really into dr who lately, and am eagerly waiting for the spare time to sit and watch all of candela obscura. i'm in a new dnd game. i've got friends! real life friends! irl friends who called me the wizard friend within a few hours of knowing me before i even opened my mouth about dnd lmao. i've discovered a new love of collage, and i've just declared my major in something unique to my school, a program called Studio for Interrelated Media. i'll be learning about illustration still through the extra electives i'll have room for, but i also get to explore printmaking in more depth, as well as event planning, installation, curation, and theatre work as well.

i miss being on here a whole bunch and want to be more active when i get more time. don't plan on abandoning this blog by any means. boston has been kind to me, and though i have had some Real Low Points, i've also been living the life i've hoped for since i was a kid. i'm good, really really good.

to my friends, ily, i miss you, and i hope you're well. can't wait to catch up on all yalls art and fic. sending all my love. <3

[sushisocks]

11 for the ask thing ^_^

Eeeheheheh!!!

From the Get to know your fic writer list!

11. Link your three favorite fics right now

Ohkay, oh my god, I'm gonna go out on a limb and assume these aren't my own fics bcz besides the ones I wrote back in like 2018, I only have 3 out, and one isn't even finished jnbhvghbjbh

I'm also gonna limit myself to RDR2 ones bcz how many of yall are here for Drarry and Klance fic recs these days anyway?? I thought so, lmao, SO

1) OBVIOUSLY I have to start out with Faithless, by my dear friend Necromantic AKA @absolutedisaster69 !!! RDR2, Charthur, Unreliable Narrator, still ongoing, and REALLY FUCKED UP SO FAR, I am simply in LOVE with it okay. If you're looking for a completely different take on Charthur, and the VDL gang as a whole, this is IT!! AND, lol, if you look through the comment section of that fic you WILL find me in there analysing the shit out of nearly every chapter, it's WILD and I'm WILDIN'!!

2) Is one I genuinely think needs more attention -- Burn Like Whiskey Flames by Lysandra_Lewis AKA @ithinkthiswasabadidea is still my FAVORITE MacSummers fic to date. Imagine me, STARVED for content, going into the Sean/Lenny tag only to find this TREASURE of a fic buried among fics that only really list them as a sidepair. It is funny, and wholesome, and so sweet it will rot your TEETH out. It's Francesca's only RDR2 fic and it is a GIFT to the fandom, okay, and thusly SEVERELY underappreciated. When Sean comes into the lodge and starts "wooing" Lenny? Bro I've read this fic so many times and I am STILL giggling and blushing EVERY TIME!!!! They are SO dumb, and I'm genuinely obsessed with them and this fic okay!!!!

3) I mean, come on, we've all read Lost Country by iridian(ryehouses here on tumblr), right? If you haven't, it's Charthur, and don't be fooled by the coffee shop au tag because there is SO much more to this fic. It's been a while since my last readthrough of it, and I'm nearing a point where I'll want to reread again for sure, but I'll leave you with my bookmark comment to give you an idea of how I feel about this fic: "this fic changed me irrevocably. i was and am obsessed with everything about this fic. i listened to the playlist for months. certain songs still make me go feral. ill never forget how this fic made me feel." DEFINITE recommend, always!!

(Honorary mention to Strange Visitor by Necro, which I was very autistic about in its final months of posting, and is where I decided I wanted to be his friend!! One year later and I am a pest in his DMs all the time <3)

I know this just said to list them, but who in their right mind doesn't GRAB at the chance to gush about their favorite fics whenever they can? Give me a break, and go read these fantastic fics if you haven't already!!!

[crimsonsynastry]

Ao3 Fic Stats Meme

Tagged by the lovely @thepapernautilus ! If you love G'raha go read their stuff. (or Astarion. I haven't read it because spoilers but I'm certain their Astarion work is excellent too)

I've been dead on Tumblr so I have no idea when you tagged me in this lovely, I'm so sorry 😂

-

rules: give us the links to your fics with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the fewest words.

Most Hits | Unbreaking Breaking | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Zenos yae Galvus | Explicit | 18k words | CW: Non-Con, Violence I knew it would be this one right off the bat. One of my darkest and still most popular works, because people, like myself I suppose, want to see Zenos do some messed up things to the WoL. Zenos, pre 6.0 I found, catered to a very dark and messed up part of my mind.. And this was the result. People just seem to also like that.

Second Most Kudos | My Moonlight, Your Starlight | Howl's Moving Castle | Sophie Hatter/Howl Pendragon | Explicit | 3.5k words It has been a hot minute since I've logged onto Ao3 to check my stats properly and *wow* I did not expect this to have so many kudos. It shot up there in popularity pretty quickly, which I suppose I had somewhat expected.. My love for Sophie and Howl is not isolated, and people want to see them together.. Particularly with Howl in bird form.

Third Most Comments | In Every Life | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Original Character/Emet-Selch | Explicit | 19k words and writing Auh, my first attempt at a longfic.. I'm surprised this one has so many comments honestly. It's on hold at the moment because I started this when my writing style was significantly different, but I do hope to come back to it later when I can fully focus on writing past tense without mixing my current present tense style of writing in there.

Fourth Most Bookmarks | Tumble After Tumble | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Emet-Selch | Explicit | 24.7k words Ohhh no now we're getting into my older older writing.. I suppose people just like kinky smut with Emet-Selch, and this fic definitely has a lot of that.

Fifth Most Words | Wilt | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Emet-Selch | Explicit | 24.5k words | CW: CNTW One of my favourites that I am still writing for the lovely Kunstpause! They enabled this wonderful piece, and I hope to return to it when I'm more alive again as I've been on a bit of a hiatus. Two more chapters have already been written so honestly this shouldn't be entry number five, but the fourth and sixth entry have already been mentioned so I might as well leave it here.

Fewest Words | Pacify | Final Fantasy XIV | F!Warrior of Light/Zenos yae Galvus | Explicit | 298 words | CW: Non-Con One of many little tidbits when I was feeling dark.. Not entirely sure why I didn't throw this one into my snippets fic, but well, there it is.

In truth I'm not sure who to tag because I have been away from fandom socmed for so long (and Im only here intermittently) but, if you haven't done it already (and if yall want to do it) I'll tag @kunstpause @drk-brain @elveny @dholwrites and @hippestglitch

[syn4k]

agree on your standpoint of comments - that can and is very disheartening. it feels like putting in effort for nothing sometimes. Yes it can be argued that one should create for oneself but then when it comes to fancontent that one decides to share - its nice to have a feedback and am also guilty of this aka being lackluster with comments - at least when it comes to the english fanfics i read; i comment better on the german side where i read as well (but then i only have the ao3 account since two weeks and i am still writing comments and leaving kudos for stuff i read ages ago) btw your ashes fanfic is on my reading list :D i have read the first chapter a while ago I might come at yall with some questions when i finally finish the current 8 chapters

thank you for the ask!

yeah, even though we are writing this fic primarily for ourself, feedback is not only appreciated but also genuinely helpful. there's this one guy who comments on every single chapter we post with his favorite line, why he enjoyed it, and his speculations on the characters and right now he is carrying the entire work

we're guilty of the not commenting thing as well, but i'm planning to change that when we get done with lunch

honestly, the best way to combat these sort of things is to follow the advice yourself, as is with all things. if you don't do it, then what's the point of speaking about it? go and leave a comment on your favorite fanwork(s) if you haven't already. i promise it's worth it (bookmark notes are also really useful too and the creator can see them unless they're private!)

also, it's genuinely really nice to know that one of our works has landed on your reading list. hope you enjoyed the first chapter, and i hope you get around to the other 8! we'd love to hear any and all theories, questions, ideas, etc you have about it :] we could talk about this shit for hours

[korebringerofded]

Changes Part 2- Tension and Want- Steddie X Reader

A/N-This is a heavy Steve and Eddie chapter so eatup yall.

Pure an cute poly content coming soon

If you haven't read part one I suggest you do.

You can find it here.

Warnings- Angst, fighting, pining Steve and Eddie having deep gay feelings for eachother, kissing, weed? My page is not for minors get out

REQUESTS ARE OPEN.

I have a fiverr for custom fics.

Steve ran his fingers through his hair while he sat on your couch, he had been too afraid to leave you alone so he and Robin had been taking shifts staying with you while the other ran the video store.

“What am I going to do?” He groaned, rubbing his face with his hands

“Go talk to her, dummy.” Robin chuckled, playfully punching his shoulder. “I know that's a crazy concept for a white guy but she is hurting, and I think that right now (Y/N) just needs a friend.” She shrugged. “But what do I know?” 

“Yeah…” Steve slumped in the chair, sighing. “I think you might be right, Robin.” Steve mumbled, rolling his eyes when he glanced over to see Robin’s toothy grin. 

“I always am!” She laughed.

Steve was haunted when he found you, the image of it made his head spin like a top. He hated to see you in danger or unhappy. 

Steve knew he would have to lock his feelings away, for your sake. 

For now, at least.

-----------------------------------------------------

“You and me, we are finished.”

Those words played in your head over and over again, the sickening pain washing over your already worn and tired body. Eddie’s words haunted you, you knew it was ridiculous but you loved him, truly and absolutely, his flaws, his rough edges. 

The nightmares were the worst part, Eddie leaving you, over and over again, the words echoing like a megaphone blaring right into your ears.

 Oftentimes you would wake yourself up by the choked sobs you spat out. 

Steve hadn’t allowed you to drink anymore as he was terrified you would disappear again, that night and the days that followed while Steve and Robin sobered you up. 

He had a feeling Eddie would be at the Kissing Rock, he was extremely pissed already and trekking through the rain was NOT on his list of things he wanted to do today. 

His anger sparked when he turned the corner of the tree and saw Eddie, leaning against the rock while he took a drag from him blunt.

“What are you doing, man?” Steve chuckled darkly, clenching his fists. 

Eddie was surprised at first, his bandaged hand sending a jolt of electricity through Steve. 

Had he been the one who broke a hole in the wall?

 Now that pissed Steve off. The idea of you, cowering and trembling in fear. It made his blood run boiling hot.

“Get out of here, Harrington.” Eddie shot him a look, eyes puffy with purple circles underneath before he went back to rolling a joining with trembling hands.

“You are acting like such a selfish asshole, you know that?” Steve snapped, shaking his finger at him like a fed-up mother as he walked towards Eddie, his anger stirring like ripples of water. 

“I am not gonna tell you again, Harrington,”  Eddie stood, eyes red and pupils completely blown. 

”Get the fuck out of here.”

For a moment Steve considered throwing in the towel, maybe it wasn’t worth it and he was just making it worse. At that thought he remembered you, at home, probably still in bed, eyes puffy and red, soft muffled sobs leaking through the walls.

Steve hadn’t meant to but the walls in your apartment were thin and the muffled sobs he heard were unavoidable.  Your big glossy eyes looking up at him apologetically when he would rush in to check on you when you would scream, the nightmares making you pale and shaken.

More than anything Steve wanted to offer you comfort, he wanted to hold you, comfort you and smell the vanilla shampoo you always used, to press his lips to yours, and to feel your skin under his palm.

Most of all he wanted to be able to fill the gap in your heart, he wanted more than anything to be what you needed. 

Fuck.

Those fucking eyes were burned into his head, they would be his downfall.

“I’m not leaving here, at least not until you agree to go and talk to (Y/N), she is hurting! She won’t eat, or go to work or read her favorite books.” Steve rambled, trying to push that image of you deep down. He couldn’t allow his feelings to ruin anything else for you.

 “You broke her heart.” He spat the words out like venom.

“Shut up!” Eddie growled, turning towards him. “If you keep talking, I will mess up that pretty fucking face of yours.” With each word Eddie spoke he stalked towards Steve until he had him pressed against the bent twisted tree behind him.

“Is that why she’s crying so much? When she argued with you, told you that you were being delusional, did you threaten to hit her?” Steve mumbled, the two holding an intense gaze. “I saw the wall, your hand. Did you fucking hit her?” Steve chuckled darkly. 

That was all it took, Eddie chuckled for a moment before swinging the first punch, knocking Steve back, the breath being knocked from his lungs when his back collided with the tree and he slid down it.

“You’re funny, Harrington. I will give ya’ that.” Eddie laughed a forced cracked dry laugh, his eyes brimming with tears. “I love her more than anything. I love her more than myself, if she asked I would take a knife and slit my own throat.” Eddie leaned down, grabbing Steve by the neck while he straddled him. “I wouldn’t hurt her, ever.” 

“You left her alone for a month. She was worried sick, she IS worried sick. You have already hurt her.” Steve growled, lunging forward to collide his fist with Eddie’s jaw, the impact knocking Eddie flat in the dirt while Steve dragged himself up, using the tree behind him for extra support.

“I found her walking down the street, in the rain, without any shoes on!” Steve dropped down to straddle Eddie, swinging a punch that knocked Eddie’s head back, trickles of blood scattering over the dirt.

“That's why I need to leave her.” Eddie grumbled, tears burning at the edges of his eyes as pain burned over his entire face. “I love her, same as you, but I also know that I am nothing but shit, and she is perfect-a goddess…a princess. I can’t compete with you.” Eddie admitted awkwardly, Steve’s cheeks flushing over a light pink. 

There was silence for a moment, the two breathing heavily, eyes connecting and in that moment Eddie could feel all the oxygen get sucked out of his lungs, his head spinning for a moment at the closeness. 

This was all so confusing, he loved you, he wanted you…but he also wanted...

“Steve?” Eddie mumbled, jaw tightening and before Steve could respond he leaned forward quickly, taking Steve’s face in his hands before connecting their lips. Steve’s stubble tickled Eddie’s chin but he could feel warmth spread over him, the kiss was deep and hot.

Steve’s eyes were wide for a moment before leaning into it, tilting his head back so Eddie could infiltrate his mouth, their tongues fighting over dominance for a moment.

They both pulled away, a string of drool from their lips as they panted, foreheads pressed together.

“I don’t understand, I thought you loved (Y/N)?” Steve asked, eyebrows furrowed. 

“Of course I do. But I…well I guess it's hard to explain but, I want you both.” He said finally.

It was sure to be a very interesting drive back.

Requests are open

Part 3 will be here

Coming soon....

Taglist-

@haylaansmi

@daddysfavoritesexkitten

@ilovecupcakesandtea

@kellysimagines

@paprikaquinn

@dylanmunson

@br66klynbaby

@sidthedollface2

@newshade

@wonderful-outcast

[golbrocklovely]

revenge of the nerd // sam golbach

A/N: the inspiration behind this fic is the photo below of sam. idk what came over me when i saw them (or the first time he wore that outfit), but i immediately had a whole fic idea when he posted them. i didn’t make this a y/n insert bc… the main character is super unlikable bc she is comically a popular girl, and i highly doubt any of yall want to be put in those shoes lol but anyway please tell me what you think about this fic ! i enjoyed writing it so hopefully you enjoy reading it.

prompt: stacy doesn’t like anyone that isn’t popular, and that includes sam. but when dared to kiss him, will she give into her feelings or win the bet?|| fem OC x sam golbach

trigger warning: SMUT, cursing, drinking/partying, over-the-top popular!OC, think of teenage comedy levels of caring about popularity but set in college, sam is a “nerd”, slight dubcon… but not really??, she actually likes it but won’t admit it at first, but then gives in, so… just be aware of that if that’s something you don’t like

word count: 3091

Being popular has always been my number one priority, ever since high school. I surrounded myself with only popular people; jocks, cheerleaders, - pretty people - and have kept it that way since I was 15. Now I'm 22, about to graduate college, and I'm still popular. I joined the best sorority at my school, cheer for our elite football team, and only talk to and socialize with the coolest fraternities on our campus. The idea of being around uncool people, nerds, is so... gross to me. Do they not realize how low on the totem pole they are? Like, why would you strive to be a loser?

"This party is so fucking lame." Heather, my best friend, sighed.

I nodded. "It's because Jared won't put on the good playlist, the one with all the early 2000s hits."

"What I would do for a Missy Elliot song right now..." Heather groaned.

I rolled my eyes. "I'll go tell him."

"You know he isn't gonna change it." She called back.

"You underestimate my abilities." I winked.

I shuffled through the party, making my way over to Jared who was by the speakers. Before reaching him, I pulled my skirt up, letting it show just a little of my ass, and shifting my bra around so my breasts were up and closer to my chin.

I seductively strolled up to Jared, lightly laying a hand on his shoulder. His eyes remained on his laptop. "What's up, Stacy?"

“Hey Jared, I was just wondering if you were taking some song requests.” I asked softly.

He shook his head, finally looking up at me. “Not at the moment, no.”

I held back my distain of the music playing around us, keeping my voice sweet. “Me and Heather would really appreciate it if you could play some early 2000s songs instead of... whatever this playlist is.”

“I don't know. I haven't heard anyone complaining.” He commented.

My voice dropped, annoyed. “I have. Plus, no one is dancing. If you play, let's say, a Missy Elliot song, people would dance. Girls... would be dancing.”

He glanced up at me, his eyes narrowing for a moment. Then he scanned my body up and down. "Would you dance?"

"Absolutely." I whispered, leaning towards him.

He cleared his throat. “After this song... I’ll play some Missy.”

"Perfect. You're ama-" A loud bunch of laughs cut me off, making me look up. Around a table right near us, were the worst kind of people. The type of people that stick out the most at parties.

Nerds.

I gasped, staring at them. "Who invited them?"

“Those guys? They're cool, Stacy.” Jared responded.

I scoffed. “Highly doubt that.”

“No seriously. I met them in a business class of mine. They're chill.” He replied.

One of them glanced up in our direction, their blue eyes landing on me. He flicked his blonde hair out of his eyes, looking me up and down.

“Who's that one?” I questioned.

Jared stared up at the group. “That’s Sam. He's really dope.”

“A man wearing that colorful of a shirt and khakis can't be dope. It's impossible.” I doubted, crossing my arms.

“Stacy, being friends with people outside of sororities and fraternities won't make you become a loser. Lighten up.” He remarked.

I turned to him, smiling bitterly. “So, are you gonna play that Missy Elliot song or not?”

Jared raised his eyebrows, scrolling over to the search bar on Spotify, and changed the song to 'Work It'. A bunch of people in the party cheered and I patted Jared’s shoulder. "Thank you."

When I looked back up at the party, that Sam guy was still staring at me. But he had a weird look on his face. He looked me over again, rolled his eyes, and took a swig of his drink.

Gross.

!!!!!

"Alright, alright. Who's ready for spin the bottle?" Heather yelled.

The party had been going on for a couple hours at this point, and everyone was feeling a bit buzzed. This was Heather's go-to to keep the party going.

Everyone in the room clapped and laughed, sitting closer to each other as a glass bottle was placed on the floor.

I sat down, smiling up at Heather. I gazed around the circle, looking at who was playing with us. A couple cute guys stuck out to me. I couldn’t help but bite my lip at all the different hotties.

"Okay, Stacy. Why don't you start us off?" Heather chuckled.

"With pleasure." I sat forward, gripped the bottle and spun it fast. It went around multiple times and finally slowed down. The bottle pointed to the left of me. I looked up, hoping one of the cute guys I saw was there, but instead... it was Sam.

Fuck! I didn't even see him!

His friends around him patted his shoulder, congratulating him.

“He's cute.” Heather mentioned, raising her eyebrows at me.

“I think the fuck not. Are you sure there isn’t someone else I can kiss?” I quickly stood up to meet Sam.

“Oh no. But we're gonna give you guys a more private setting to do this in.” Heather shoved me towards the closet, Sam's friends forcing him in as well. Before I could protest, the light to the closet was turned on as the door was slammed shut.

The light thumping of the music mixed with our breathing. I let out a huge sigh and leaned against the wall, trying not to knock over the coats next to me.

"I thought this was spin the bottle, not seven minutes in heaven." Sam mumbled jokingly.

I barked back. “So you know, I will not be kissing you.”

“Hey, that's your choice. I don't mind.” He threw his hands up defensively.

I hummed, my hands resting on my hips. “I'm surprised. I would think you would give any chance to kiss a girl.”

He scrunched up his face. “...Why would you think that?”

“Have you ever even kissed a girl?” I inquired.

“Yes I have. With tongue too.” He mockingly gasped, “I've also had sex.”

“That's surprising.” I deadpanned.

He cocked his head slowly. “Is there a reason why you don't like me? You don't even know me.”

“Look, I've tried my hardest to stay as far away from people like you since I was a freshman in high school.” I stated.

“And who are people like me?” Sam puzzled.

“Losers. Nerds. Non jocks and cheerleaders. You know, people who aren't popular.” I hissed.

He held back a laugh. “Wow. People like you actually exist?”

I scowled at him. “What the hell does that mean?”

“You still care about popularity.” He answered.

I jeered. “Like you don't.”

“No. I’m not still in high school.” He snapped back.

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever...”

The silence in the closet was heavy, boring me senseless. I glanced at Sam. He seemed lost in thought for a second, and finally our eyes connected.

“The only reason you won't kiss me is because I'm a nerd?” He asked.

“Yeah. I know how guys like you kiss. It's gross and not worth it.” I retorted, leaning against the wall.

He sassed. “I thought you said you don't go near people like me.”

“Well, you gotta kiss a frog or two before you find a prince.” I explained.

He raised an eyebrow at me. “How about I dare you?”

“Dare me to what?” I glared.

Sam bit his lip, holding back a smirk. “I dare you to kiss me. If you hate it, you can go out to that party and tell everyone that I suck at kissing and that I’m a loser.”

“You already are that.” I spoke, mocking his smile.

“Yeah, but now you can announce it to everyone.” He added, getting closer, “You can embarrass me in front of all your friends… maybe then they’ll realize what a loser I am.”

I paused, humming for a second. Finally, I looked back at him, sitting up. “Humiliating you does sound like so much fun.”

“But what if you lose?” He questioned, his voice low.

I held back a snort, stepping up to him and slowly moving my hands to his shoulders. “If I lose? That’s cute.”

He grabbed my wrists before I could even touch him. “If you lose, I get the satisfaction of knowing you liked it and that I, maybe, turned you on.”

“Right, okay.” I snickered, rolling my eyes.

“I’m serious.” His voice deepened, his eyes narrowing in on my lips.

I shrugged, freeing my wrists from his surprisingly gentle grasp. “Fine. Whatever. Just kiss me so we can get this over with.”

Sam leaned in quickly, his lips connecting with mine. The kiss was soft, sweet. Something I hadn't really experienced all that much with guys. Most guys I got with were rough, which was fine, but this... was a nice change of pace.

I mean, for a nerd.

Sam lightly cupped my hips, his thumbs rubbing my skin. I drifted my hands up to his shoulders, tracing his collarbone with my fingers. His tongue glided across my bottom lip. I inhaled at the movement.

Does he really think I'm gonna let him put his tongue in my mouth?

Suddenly, I felt his one hand snake across every one of my curves as it moved up my body, his hand finally stopping to tangle his fingers into my hair. Then his other hand drifted down and smacked my ass, squeezing it firmly. I gasped against his lips and his tongue slithered into my mouth. He tasted intoxicating, like mint and vodka. As our tongues danced against each other, I pushed my body closer to him, deepening the kiss.

What the fuck am I doing?! Am I really... liking this?

No! Of course not. He's the one that needs to be humiliated, not me.

Before I could even think to pull away, he backed me up until my body was forced up against the wall, taking me by surprise. The hand in my hair pulled lightly on my locks, making me almost moan into our kiss. His other hand massaged my upper thigh, rubbing circles into my almost exposed skin. His hand dipped lower, grazing the back of my knee and bringing it to around his hip.

He pressed his body against mine, forcing my other leg to spread open further. Then suddenly, he began to grind his hips against mine. The slow thrusts made me feel dizzy for a moment, my body flushed with heat.

I must be going crazy... this feels so good.

Sam ripped his mouth away from mine, kissing across my jaw and down my neck. He found my favorite spot, under my earlobe, and began to suck and nibble on the skin. Hearing and feeling his breath so close to my ear made my stomach do cartwheels.

I bit my lip hard, trying to keep my moans from escaping. I knew I shouldn't be liking this, but I couldn't stop myself. I couldn't help but feel turned on by Sam's actions. He really knew what to do to make me wet.

My cheeks turned even more pink as I felt the dampness in my panties grow. I hadn't even realize how turned on I had become. Sam's mouth drifted even further down and kissed the tops of my breasts.

I felt his name leave my mouth in a breathy whisper. His piercing blue eyes glanced up at me for a second, an almost smirk appearing on his lips.

Oh my God, the bet! I completely forgot about it.

One of his hands rested high up on the leg that was wrapped around his waist. I could feel it inching closer and closer to my sex, the pooling heat between my legs. I didn't want him to know how wet he was making me.

“Are you turned on?” His mouth murmured against my skin.

“W-what?” I stuttered.

“I said, are you turned on?” He repeated.

“No.” I muttered breathlessly.

He pursed his lips, squinting at me. “Are you lying to me?”

I huffed, furrowing my brow. “Why would I lie?”

“Because…” His hand swiftly cupped my sex, pressing my damp panties against my clit. I shuddered out a gasp, gripping his forearms from the sudden sensation. “I think your body says otherwise.”

“That d-doesn’t mean anything.” I squeaked.

He pressed his palm against my clit, rubbing circles. “No? Do you get this wet for everybody? That’s pretty slutty if you ask me.”

My cunt throbbed at his words. “I’m not a slut.”

“I didn’t say you were. I just said that if you get this wet for any guy that grinds against you for two seconds… than you’re slutty. But I don’t think that’s true.” Sam uttered, his eyes gazing into mine.

“It’s not.” I whimpered.

“I know, baby. You’re wet because I made you feel this… good.” His lips grazed my skin as he pressed his body against mine. “Just admit it and I’ll actually touch you.”

My hips bucked against his hand, wanting more. The small circles he rubbed into my aching clit were not enough, and I could feel my pussy soaking my panties more.

I grunted, squeezing his shoulders tight. “Jesus, fine. You turn me on, Sam. Now fucking touch me!”

“Gladly.” He narrowed his eyes at me, yanking my panties down to my knees. Then he slid his hand down to my sex again and began fingering me.

I leaned my head back against the wall, my eyes rolling back in pleasure. His speed wasn’t fast enough, and I needed more than just his fingers. My hands drifted down to his pants, undoing the belt quickly.

“What are you doing? We can’t fuck in here.” He protested, pulling away from my hands.

“Yes we can.” I argued.

“We’ll get caught. Aren’t they gonna come back?” Sam puzzled.

“No. Heather usually just throws couples into every closet and bedroom that’s in this house and ends the game. She never actually times it. So, we can fuck and not get caught.” I informed, yanking him by his belt loops back into me.

“Is that what you want?” He smirked, staring me down.

I nodded my head, unzipping his pants and letting his bulge pop out.

He grabbed my hand, keeping his fingers still inside me. “Say it.”

“Say what?” I choked.

“Say what you want me to do to you.” Sam commanded.

I exhaled deeply. “Why don’t you say it first?”

He sped up his fingers, making me bit my lip hard. “Of course I want to fuck you. You knew that the moment we made eye contact a couple hours ago. But now, I need to hear you say it.”

“You already know what I want.” I whined.

“I don’t know… How can I be sure you want me to fuck you unless you say it?” He slowed his movements down to an almost stop again.

I growled, bucking my hips. “Fuck you.”

“I think one of those words is wrong.” He chuckled darkly.

I stared up at the ceiling as he closed the space, his lips running up my neck.

“Come on baby. Use that pretty mouth for me,” Sam whispered harshly. “Tell me what you want.”

“Sam, just fuck me already.” My breath hitched, the desperation dripping from my voice.

His fingers picked up their pace again, going faster than before. “Is that what you want? You want me to fuck you?”

“Yes, please.” I begged.

“You want me to make you cum around my cock?” As his fingers slid in and out, his thumb began to massage my clit.

I moaned loudly. “Oh my God, yeah!”

“Are you close?” He asked, gazing into my eyes.

“Mm-hmm.” I panted, unable to form words.

He kept his pace until suddenly he slowed his fingers down, pulling them out hastily.

“W-what are you doing?” I stammered.

“I won the bet.” He muttered, his eyes meeting mine.

My heart stopped. “The bet…”

“Yeah. Did you forget about it?” His mouth twitched, a smile almost appearing.

“No, I remember it.” I cleared my throat, wrapping my hands around his waist. “But so what? You were right. You turned me on. And now you get to fuck me. Congratulations.”

“I don’t want to fuck you.” He moved my hands off him.

“That’s a lie.” I let out a short laugh, glancing down at his hard cock.

He licked his lips, zipping his pants back up. “Yeah, it is. Actually, I don’t think you deserve to fuck me.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” My face dropped, realizing he was serious.

“I’ve had popular girls before, and from personal experience… they aren’t that good,” he smiled smugly. “And even though you are dripping for me, you don’t deserve to cum.”

I scoffed loudly. “Fuck you!”

He shrugged, almost opening the closet door. Then he turned back to me. “Remember next time, be nice to nerds.”

Sam winked at me and brought his hand up to his mouth. He licked his fingertips, my juices still on them. My eyes widened at his action, watching as he tasted me. Then, he quickly grabbed the door handle and left me alone in the closet.

After a minute of catching my breath, I slid my panties back on, ignoring the uncomfortable sensation of the wet fabric.

Oh my God, what if he told people at the party about what happened?

I rushed out of the closet, searching quickly for Heather. She was by the beer pong table, cheering on a group of guys.

“Did Sam say anything?” I asked, tapping her arm as I reached her.

“What?” She responded.

I groaned. “Did Sam say anything when he left the closet?”

“No. He came up to me, said he had to go back to his dorm, and just left. He didn’t even say goodbye to his friends.” She admitted.

I exhaled. “Oh thank God.”

Her eyes scanned my face. “Are you okay? Your face is so red.”

“Um… yeah.” My eyes made contact with Jared across the room, “I just… need to go do something real quick.”

I walked up to him, moving past the girl that he was talking to. “Hey Jared?”

“Yeah?” He questioned.

I pushed my body up against his, pressing my lips to his ear. “I want you to take me upstairs and fuck me.”

He choked on his drink. “What?”

“Take me upstairs and fuck me.” I stated bluntly, glaring into his eyes.

He nodded his head nervously, grabbing my hand. “Uh… sure thing.”

|| PART 2 >>

[sunshinetoshi]

saying and staying in love

timeskip!oikawa x reader (2.4k words)

tw: angst, cheating, arguing/fighting

A/N: OKAY so this one caused me SO MUCH pain. it took me weeks to write through it (lol i also cried proofreading it today) xx this is part two of a (5) part fic but i don’t think it’s necessary to read all of them or read them in order. they’re split up to be an easier read but, if you’re interested, i’ll be linking the other parts at the end of each part as they come out. also tysm for all the support on the first part yall made me real soft yikes

That night you didn't say much to Oikawa. You didn't question him about any of it, afraid of the lies he might craft. That would make it all the more painful.

You used the same lame tummy-problems excuse on him and he reluctantly gave you the space you ask for but other than that he acted like everything was normal, like everything was okay.

The next morning he gave you a kiss goodbye before he went to volleyball practice. "And where are you off to today, my love."

You tried not to make the tightened grip on the mug you're holding obvious. "Oh I'm stopping by an old high school friend's place after my classes. It's been a while since we caught up."

It was a half truth. Oikawa smiled at you and told you to be safe before heading out the door.

You did catch up with a high school friend. Yesterday evening before Oikawa got home you made a phone call to a friend who knew the girl Oikawa was with. And he told you where she worked.

-----

That’s how you later found yourself outside a hair salon, telling yourself this was a bad idea. You knew it was. But the thought of coming here was the only thing that stopped the incessant tears you shed after Oikawa left earlier.

You started tearing up again and you turned back around to head to your car. You couldn't do this.

But then you had no choice.

"Oh my- Y/L/N?" It was her. Headed toward the hair salon doors with a lunch box. She must've just come from break. She got closer to you. "It is you!"

You meekly waved at her and tried to muster a smile.

When she finally reached you she frowned. "Hey are you okay? Have you been crying?"

"Yeah, I'm-" your tears threatened to spill. "Actually, I'm not." You said it quietly but she heard you.

And she wrapped her arms around you as you sobbed. You remembered that she'd been known as a kind girl and a sweetheart in high school, of course she would be comforting you. A wave of insecurity washed over you and your hurt deepened. She was an amazing person.

When you quieted a bit she spoke up, "Do you want to talk about it?"

And you didn't. Not with her. But you knew you had to.

Your voice was so shaky when you spoke. "I’ve been dating Oikawa Tooru for the past two years."

Her eyes widened but she listened intently as you spoke. You explained how you saw them yesterday. How you haven't spoken to Oikawa yet. How you were sorry to bombard her at her work. How much you loved him. How you were so broken.

When you finished and looked at her she calmly asked to see pictures of you and Oikawa from the past two years. You obliged and flipped through photos on your phone. It was hard to avoid the look of joy the two of you had in the pictures.

She sighed and rubbed her temples. Then she looked at you earnestly. "I am so sorry Y/N. He told me he wasn't seeing anyone right now. If I knew he was dating someone I would never have done this." She went on to tell you how they ran into each other two months ago. And they’d been talking ever since. When she finished she glanced away embarrassed. "What are you going to do now?"

You took a while to respond. It was the first decision you made yesterday after you saw them. You didn’t want to say it aloud.

"I'm leaving him."

With the way you clenched your fist you could feel your fingernails sinking into your palms. You hated how you spoke, it wasn't your voice. It was so much colder and there was an emptiness to it. What you hated more was what you were saying. Will it be the right decision? Will you be able to do it?

You're brought out of your thoughts when you noticed her nodding her head.

"I think you should," she gave a sympathetic smile before quickly continuing, "And don't worry about me and him, that's over now. I would never knowingly date such a jerk."

Part of you was relieved and wanted to praise her. And another part of you wanted to defend Oikawa and say he wasn't a jerk. But you didn't have to choose which to go with because she continued.

"He disrespected both of us, Y/N. And I'm just really sorry."

Again you felt the need to defend Oikawa. But she was right. He did disrespect you. You and everything your relationship was. 

-----

When you heard the jingling of keys by the door you knew it was Oikawa entering your apartment.

You picked yourself off of the floor where you'd been slumped over since you got home, thinking of how this might play out.

His eyes lit up and his shoulders relaxed when his gaze landed on you.

And you were confused. How could he still look at you with so much warmth after what he’d been doing?

He immediately frowns when he notices your tear-stained cheeks and glossy eyes. He dropped his gym bag and rushed over to you.

"Hey, what's wrong? What happened?"

You burst into tears and hid your face in your hands.

Oikawa wrapped his arms around your shaking body. He shushed you and pet your hair to calm you down.

You wanted to stop him, to push him away. But you sank into his chest and cried even harder.

How did it happen that the person who you could always go to at your very worst was now the very person who had put you in that state?

“Love, tell me what happened.”

You shook your head.

He sighed, “Please, you’re worrying me. I want to know.”

You lifted your head off his chest and he loosened his hold on you. You didn’t look into his eyes.

“I saw,” you started but you hiccup from your crying. You tried again but all that came out was incoherent mumbling as tears started again.

“Y/N I can’t understand you. What did you see?”

You brought your head up straight. You managed to stop the sobs enough to hear the breathy, quiet sentence echo in your living room. “I said I saw you cheating on me.”

Watching his eyes widen snapped something inside you. You began to ramble, not perceptive to Oikawa shaking his head or his repeated whispers saying ‘No, oh no.’ You didn’t move as he grabbed your hand and gave it a kiss or when he dried your tears and ran his fingers through your hair.

You can only hear the words fighting, rather spilling their way out of your mouth. Bits and pieces of what you say register in your head and the images replay and hurt you all over again.

“You lied to me..I was at the shopping center..I saw you kiss her..she made you smile..you played with her hair..you came home... kissing me with those same lips that touched her..you acted like everything was okay-”

“Everything is okay!”

His words brought you out of the trance-like state you were in. And your eyes darted to him. You got goosebumps at the bellowing of your voice. “How is everything okay? Everything is not okay and apparently things haven’t been okay, have they? For two months.”

“How did-”

“She told me! I saw her and she told me how you ran into her two months ago. How you told her you were single. For two months you’ve been hiding things from me and lying to me and treating me like I’m some idiot you can fool and the worse part is you did. I was an idiot. I didn’t see any of it until I saw you two in front of me.” Your throat was in so much pain from the yelling. You tried to catch your breath through the congestion from crying. A sudden tiredness from the constant crying hit you and now when you spoke it was weaker. Broken. “Why did you have to cheat Tooru? If you wanted to take a break you could’ve talked to me, if you wanted me to change, I would’ve..”

Oikawa jumped in. “I didn’t want to take a break. And I would never want you to change,” he cupped your cheeks with both hands. He was crying and his eyes were desperate. “Please, please listen to me.”

This time you did push his hands away. You backed away from him a couple of steps. “Are you in love with her?”

You spent hours of the day preparing yourself for this, preparing to shield yourself from getting too hurt when he said yes.

“No, of course not.”

And somehow that answer was worse.

He closed the space between you and held your arms as he spoke. “Y/N, please listen to me. I made a mistake, it was a stupid, stupid decision. I should’ve never talked to her. You’re the only one I love. I never felt anything for her that came close to the love I feel for you. I love you. I love you. I love you.” He had begun sobbing and he fell to his knees, repeating those three words. 

Your hand covered your mouth at the sight. 

“Tooru.”

He lifted his head to look at you.

“I am in love with you.” No matter how wrecked your voice was it was still so pure and genuine. Because it was true. You were still in love with him. You waited for his answer.

“I love you too, I love you so much!” He reached forward and wrapped his arms around your hips. You could feel his tears through your shirt as he put his head against your stomach. “Please, Y/N. Please forgive me. We can work this out. I know we can. Please, my love. We can work through this.”

A part of you was screaming that what you were about to do wasn’t fair. That it was a petty reason. That he can’t read your mind and know what you were looking for. That you should lift him up and tell him you two could work this out. It was your heart screaming.

But your gut was telling you to stand firm. You had a plan going into this. And this part was going exactly as planned. And you hated it.

He said he loved you but he didn’t say he was in love with you. It was a small detail and he may have easily just been overwhelmed to think about semantics but to you it was indescribable what that phrase meant to you. That phrase was at the core of this relationship. It was an exchange of words you two have had everyday for the past two years. If anything it was more than that.

You told yourself earlier that you were leaving. You knew you had to. No matter how you felt, you were leaving. And the one phrase that maybe, just maybe, could have redeemed you and him from this pain wasn’t said. It’s final, you were leaving.

So you took a deep shaky breath and couldn’t help but tangle your fingers in his hair. One last time. “I’m in love with you Tooru.”

You shut your eyes before looking at him again. “But I don’t think we can work this out.” You removed his tightened grip on your legs and bent down across from him. Your own tears fell down your face but still you focus on wiping the tears off his cheeks. “I’m sorry. But I can’t let myself stay. I can’t do that to myself. Even though it’s going to hurt like hell,” you laugh but it was strained and empty. 

And you could see the moment that Oikawa realized it for himself. He broke you and nothing he said would make you stay. You’ve made the decision. You two sat quietly, mourning what you both realize you’ve lost. “I’m going to miss you.”

Oikawa’s breaths suddenly became laborious and this time you wrapped your arms around him and let him sob, trying to soothe him.

A while passed and you lifted his head. “Tooru, I want you to listen to me, okay? You are one of the most strong-hearted people I have ever been blessed to know. And you are going to Argentina. I want you to go. And I want you to show them what you’re made of. You have worked so damn hard for this and I can’t be prouder than I already am. I want you to know I will always be cheering for you. Alright?”

He knew you were saying goodbye. He was clinging to every word you said. “Are you leaving right now?” His voice was barely above a whisper.

You smile sadly, “I don’t think I can sleep here anymore.” You look around the apartment that, despite being yours, felt like the home you two were building together.

You moved even closer to him and looked at him. You took each other in. You sighed and leaned your forehead on his. “Please take care of yourself, Tooru.”

“Only if you promise to do the same.” He lifted your head up and brushed his fingers on your cheek, “I’m so sorry Y/N.”

You nodded. “I know.” You did. “I know,” you repeated. You felt your eyes water again. “Tooru, I know I’m leaving but please know I don’t hate you. I know you’re going to beat yourself up and I can’t handle that thought so please don’t be so hard on yourself. Because I don’t hate you. I am still so deeply in love with you.”

You looked at the love of your life. You leaned forward and softly placed your lips on his. You never thought about what your last kiss with Oikawa would be like, you never imagined his kisses would be limited. And while this wasn’t the most clean or romantic kiss, you two could feel the passion. As it progressed you two tried to convey in this one kiss what the other person meant to you. And it was all there. The pain and the guilt but more importantly the care and the love.

You pulled away first and steadied your breath. “Tooru.”

He looked into your eyes.

“I don’t want your last words to be ‘I’m sorry.’”

He looked down in guilt but you lifted him gently by the chin and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. “I know it’s selfish but can you tell me you’re in love with me.”

taglist: @daichis-kitty​ @elianetsantana​ @rrroadkill​ @minnieminnie00-got7​ @dudejuststop​ @tsukkisfatsimp​ @sakusasonlywife​ @kotarosbabygirl​

if you want to be added to the taglist for this fic lmk xx thank you for reading

part one // part two // part three // part four // part five

[elriell]

Headcanon: Mor, potentially knowing of Azriel and Elain's bond and connection, volunteers to help train Elain in growing into her powers and knowing the basics of fighting. Especially due to the fact that Azriel is forbidden from being around Elain. So Mor steps up to the plate, trains Elain, and possibly becomes Elriel's so called "chaperone" on their journey. I have a feeling Mor can connect with Elain on the basis of making choices for herself that go against the majority rule and dealing with the consequences that arise. Helping Elain "design her future, her fate, with her own bare hands."

Headcanon: I truly feel Elain will rise up. I read this in a fanfic by julesherondalex on A03. Its called "My Strength Is Yours". (I dont know if the author has tumblr but if you know them feel free to tag them.) It brought up a theory I havent heard and I just haven't been able to get over it. I'm just gonna put a couple snippets. Its so beautifully written please go read it...it is an Elriel fic yall fyi.

Somewhere, wind rose to life. His shadows skittered away entirely.

“I’m Made, Azriel,” Elain declared now – a strong gust of wind favored her by carrying her voice all around him. Even nature lay to her feet.

“I understand what the Cauldron gave me. But it never meant to rob me of choice. My will is still my own. I belong to myself. And Azriel, I will choose who to kiss. Or to love.”

Fueled by her words, the wind picked up her honey hair, tousling and sweeping it over her shoulders. The strands whipped against her back with precise aim until Azriel wondered if Elain, indeed, was wielding the essence of nature right in this instance. He had never believed her Seer abilities to be all of the Cauldron’s gift, and his shadows sensed hidden powers beneath the known. He was proven right by the different kind of energy that seemed to course beneath her skin and through her veins now.

Maybe the Cauldron had sensed her affinity for growing and tending to gardens and poured its powers right into that well. Azriel’s breath was ripped from him as the thought tunneled into a new certainty.

If Nesta commanded the power of Death, then Elain…Elain might wield the power of Life.

CAN YOU IMAGINE!!! What a Goddess. And with Mor teaching her!? Hot damn 🔥

I also recommend this fic because it talks about Elain literally forging a bond with Azriel. Being Made, she can choose her own fate. I don't know exactly what SJM has planned, but I really hope its something akin to these ideas.

Please go read it!!!

Also, I'm so sorry this ask is everywhere. I just got so excited and had to share. 🥺

HAHAHAHAHAH I just asked for a any headcanons, and your next message is one! So in sync xD

As to the first one, heck yes, honestly I feel like if her book is coming up anytime soon she will have to have some more building up because she was so absent throughout ACOSF. It makes sense to tie off the whole Moriel storyline and also I don't think it is really up for much debate that Mor definitely knows whats up with Azriel and Elain, there are so many hints!

I have ALWAYS said Elain should have power of life!!! It makes complete and total sense especially as Nesta has been confirmed to yield death. I cannot see how it could go any other way not to mention her whole vibe.

I will absolutely go read it now because that sounds incredible and yesssssssss of course I will tag, WE LOVE YOU @julesherondalex you are amazing ♥

Never apologise this is amazing, and I most definitely am going to go give it a read, because this sounds epic and it has been a while since I read any Elriel FF!

YAAAAAAYYYY

[autistic-damian-wayne]

Dutch Tim AU???? 👀

Might I get to know more? 👉👈

(Als always, batc.est shippers dni <3 i hate yall)

OK SO

Honestly I have completely forgotten how I got here, but I'm just gonna assume it's bc I love Tim and am Dutch so I just got the galaxy brain idea to combine them. I actually made this meme a while ago fagshfkghk

So yes this au was just born of me wanting to put an aspect of myself onto one of my favourite characters (looks at my glasses Jason fic)

Yes the Tim in this is trans and autistic like my usual stuff

Basically Tim's mom is Dutch and he grows up in the Netherlands for most of his childhood and moves to the US with his dad after she dies at... around 12 or 13 probably.

The Bats still exists btw, though I thiiiink this is a Jason lives and a "Lotsa Bad Stuff Gets Yoten" au so there's that. I haven't hashed out the details of how Tim joins the family he just Does dw abt it

The important stuff is of course the shenanigans

Oh before I get into that, I gave Tim a Dutch last name!! De Vogel, which means the bird because I think I'm funny. So now he's Tim Drake de Vogel-Wayne aka Tim Bird Bird

This got really long so I put it under a read more yw to all followers who don't care about this au you already have to see enough of my bullshit

Poor Timmy's last name is always butchered 😔

Except Dick, because Dick speaks a little Dutch ("Dick you are my new favourite brother" "i only pronounced the g right" "exactly")

We Dutch are passionate about our G

Damian can also pronounce it right. Tim nearly cries

Tim: Dick and Damian are the only valid fucking people in this family

Duke: but-

Tim: come back when you can pronounce verschrikkelijk

(Translation: horrible, though it's more about the g sound rather than the meaning) (ch makes a g sound in Dutch. Don't ask)

SPEAKING OF PRONUNCIATION

Tim rages when people dare pronounce Van Gogh wrong

He looks like this:

Jason: so this burglar seems to be obsessed with van go

Tim: van gogh

Jason: what?

Tim: it's pronounced van gogh you fuck

Jason: how are you making that sound with your throat

Tim fucks with his siblings using Dutch

Tim: wat zijn jullie aan het lullen

His sibs: what

Tim: ah. Wrong language. I said what are you talking about?

(Translation: technically it says "what are you dicking". Lullen is talking bullshit)

Jason being an annoying shit:

Tim: krijg de pest

Jason: what

Tim: I said shut up

(Translation: get the plague)

Here he was pretending he mixed up his languages but that actually happens a lot (trust me i would know)

Tim, walking into the kitchen: goedemorgen, nog iets interessants gebeurd terwijl ik sliep? Heeft Damian een nieuwe hond ofzo, ik kwam een chihuahua tegen die we volgens mij eerder niet hadden

Bruce:

Tim: nou je hoeft me niet te negeren hoor

Bruce: Tim...

Tim:

Tim: FUCK WRONG LANGUAGE

(Translation: Good morning, anything interesting happen while i was asleep? Does Damian have a new dog or something, I came across a chihuahua I'm pretty sure we didnt have before

(Well you don't gotta ignore me)

When English Hard, Tim and Dick will sit together and talk in a mix of languages

Tim speaks Dutch, English, German, French and Latin bc I speak those languages (ok not fluent in the last 3 and especially not German but Dutch and German is close enough that we can kind of understand each other)

I don't have any specifc language headcanons for Dick, but he knows the basics of a lot of languages including Dutch so he and Tim can communicate a-ok when not using English

Bruce: hey tim-

Tim: ich spreche pas anglais vandaag

(Translation: I don't speak English today, in a horrid combination of German, French, and Dutch)

Dick, sticking his head in Tims room: hey tim bruce said- what are you doing?

Tim, hanging from the curtains and watching a YouTube video upside down: studying

Dick: with a spanish video? For Latin?

Tim: yeah?

Dick: you dont even speak Spanish

This is a self callout. I have done this exact thing (minus the curtains)

Tim usually swears in English because a lot of Dutch swears are English

Though when he's really mad he says godverdomme (god damn me, aka the radder version of god damn it)

Yes I do that <3

Jason: the Netherlands?

Tim: Holland.

Jason: oh, like Amsterdam?

Tim: I'm disowning you as my brother.

Ok I'm getting real tired now but I have more!! Ask me about ice skating or bicycles or HEMA!! I love talking about my aus/fics

[kitasfox]

hii i had a genuine question! if you really love writing and all of that, why do you think it's your followers specifically that took it from you for not interacting with your work? would that not be the want of notes or attention on your work leading to demotivation? just genuinely curious cause if you love it i'd just keep going no matter what notes you get, but maybe i don't fully understand <3

man idk if it's my mood rn but this feels too fucking passive aggressive to me rn but okay. as I screamed out of my ass many times before on this and my old blogs— yes writing is something we do for ourselves, but only partly.

If you write you know how hard it is to actually complete a fucking fic. Daydreaming is something but writing something else. First of all, it takes time. It changes of course but for me writing a linger fic around 3-5k takes me minimum a week, usually 2 weeks. You write whenever you get the chance; on the subway, walking somewhere, in the cafe waiting for you friends, with the friends, hell even on the fucking toilet sometimes because fuck you haven't written for so long and people forget about you and the interaction fuck fuck fuck—

It takes energy. Look if you aren't a writer idk how to explain just how much energy writing requires because holy fuck— you have 50 drafts. You want to write. You really really want to write. But you cant. The characterisation must be right, the plot must make sense and planning feels like fucking hell sometimes because it won't won't you just can't think nothing sounds right nothing sounds good is this becoming boring will people even read this I spent so much time and energy will people read this is this boring fuck im rewriting this you know what I hate this where's my other wip— yall we don't just sit, drink, think, write. That thinking part sometimes doesn't work. Sometimes you literally spend HOURS on one fucking scene and it doesn't work. Just no. You rewrite. The energy you spend while trying to think of another scene to make this rewritten version work because the whole fucking plot changes. I sometimes wake up from my sleep bcs FUCK THAT SHOULD BE THE PLOT THATS HOW IT SHOULD GO and my notes are a fucking disaster of 3 am ramblings for a fic.

You have no idea how frustrating it is to not be able to write what you think. Daydreaming is one of my favorite things but writing it is fucking hard man it's HARD. Cuz be honest do your daydreams make sense? Does anyone else would want to read it? But again, writing can be very very frustrating. I sometimes curse the day I started it.

But then, there's sharing it.

Why do we share? Because every once in a blue moon you see validation from someone, there's that one person who says thank you for writing this, it made my day. That makes my week, month year life. To know that that thing you spent so much energy and time on did make someone happy. It's addicting jts fucking addicting— it's like working so damn hard on a project for school yes? And you present it and that prof you absolutely adore tells you you did amazing. Now you understand how happy it makes us feel?

But then there's you guys who stare us with a poker face, the audience that applauds faintly as an act of courtesy. They don't say anything go you, they just smile and wave until the next presenter comes. No feedbacks, no that was cool! nice idea, no sharing it w the friends to say hey look this was a cool project! nah, just a nod of head and there, you can leave the stage now. That hurts man. Hurts like a motherfucker because you did this for yourself but also you really really wanted to see the audience and your professor tell you that you did good and that was nice because you gave too much for it and you want to know,,,, it was worth it.

Long story short; it makes us feel worthless.

[babygirlwolverine]

i saw your post about getting anon asks, and it's the anon who originally asked about which episode you'd rewrite, which turned into the Regarding Dean fic. i guess i should use an emoji to identify myself or something lol

just wanted to say hi since i haven't done an anon ask in a while, and to say i adored the fic. i had to keep forcing myself to slow down while i was reading bc i was getting too excited. it's one of those fics i'll remember forever.

i'm really loving the holiday advent event and reading your drabbles for that.

please never stop writing <3

omg omg omg hi! I was just thonking about you the other day and i was wondering if you liked the fic (wondering… hoping… desperately praying that you did). But also, yeah, i just miss talking to yall. I think everyone is just busy with school and the holidays, but I miss getting asks from yall. I usually get quite a few a day, but it’s been quiet and I’m not getting any lately so i was just missing talking to yall. oooooh yes, an emoji would be very cute! But also just knowing you’re the nonnie who asked about episode fics, i just know you’re my regarding dean nonnie <3

heheh oh this made me so happy omg hi <3 I’m so glad to see you again and to be receiving a sweet little anon ask from you! Thank you so so much for saying you adored the regarding dean fic, oh gosh, I’m literally going o start crying because you have no idea how much it means to me to hear you say that! I really hoped you’d like it, and knowing this fic was inspired by you, i was just so nervous but gosh I’m so glad you liked it! Omg omg omg wait that’s so cute you had to make yourself slow down when you read it because you were so excited! Literally that’s the best kinda feeling knowing someone enjoyed it so much they had to try and slow down because they were consuming the fic too fast heheh! Okay, now I’m definitely 100% crying! You’re gonna remember this fic forever?! *sobs happy tears* that’s like a writers dream come true; to write something that leaves such a strong impact on someone that they remember it. Wow. Just wow. Speechless. utterly lost for words. I love you <3

yesssss omg I’m so happy that you’re enjoying all the beautiful and amazing things that are being created by everyone for the advent calendar event, that makes me so happy and it’s so heartwarming to see that there is people who are participating and having fun with the prompts! also, oh my god, okay wait, someone is actually reading those little fics/drabbles and is liking them? Oh oh OH! Literally didn’t know if anyone was liking the holiday advent fics i’ve been writing, so hearing this just put the biggest smile on my face oh my gOD okay I’m hugging you so tight right now omg!

thank you omg you’re so sweet! <3 i promise to keep writing and sharing with you all <3