#GET PUNCHED LOSER!!!
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magicicephoenix · 26 days ago
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finally face to face! this was a long time coming
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whatt-the · 3 months ago
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Gift for @uno-san
College Stanford x milf reader
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Content warnings: age gap obviously, stanford is a warning because I am tired of people pretending he isn't odd as hell, fem reader
Author's note: this takes place in an AU where Stanley never ruined ford's project and he got into his dream college. He is taken under the wing of an esteemed scientist, shenanigans (cheating on ur husband in a loveless marriage) ensue.
devious devious art about this coming soon! Both targeted and about the ambiguous "reader".
This is also only part 1 and there will definetly be more to come
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Imagine how Stanford felt when first being invited to his mentor's house, after a particularly lengthy discussion on whatever topic the lecture his mentor gave happened to be about. I can imagine all sorts of emotions running through his mind... anxiety, excitement, a bit of shock- he knew he was smart, but he never thought his theories were reasonable enough to challenge his mentor's views: you see, he really idolized that man. Continuing their discussions would be an honor, and the mere mention of publishing multiple papers with him had stanford's mind racing, he could barely contain his joy!
Now, understand that he had plans for the unexpected visit: he'd prove his worth, his technical prowess, anything to get more of that sweet, sweet approval. We both know he didn't have much of that in his youth, neither did he get much of it now... it seems he is always the single oddest character in any given room, even amongst other well educated, motivated students. "Teacher's pet", "tryhard", he couldn't believe it at first- such childish insults at such an esteemed institution? He thought those got left behind in high school. How innocent he is. Regardless:
His plans were to prove himself.
Well, like I said, were.
Right now? His mind couldn't be further from his studies.
He'd made it to the house alongside the professor, the discussion now spanning multiple topics- he was having fun. Rare, considering any of his other interactions with quite literally anyone else.
(Truly the outcomes are deplorable. His social skills are lacking to an astronomical degree, to the point where it is borderline comical how little he knows about human interaction. It is a cliché, the nerd who doesn't know how to socialize, but it wouldn't be so popular of a trope if it didn't often get reflected in reality. Not like he knew it was very popular to begin with: even the claim that he learned to interact with others through books would be false, since he strayed from any sort of romantic narrative. It was out of a feeling of inadequacy, really.)
Then, the door was opened.
And that's when he met you for the first time.
"You! You're Stanford right? I've heard good things from my husband here-"
"Come on, don't flatter the kid yet." Your husband spoke with a chuckle
"Hey! He deserves to hear how good he's doing! Come here." You walked forward and hugged him, it was your way of greeting people. It was warmer and more welcoming- both things the world lacked severely.
(Stanford found himself paralyzed where he stood for a few moments. He'd already found your personality endearing -your appearence even moreso-, and now you're pressed up against him? He simply must be dreaming. You felt so soft against him-- heavens, how long had it been since he'd received a hug? Far too long, clearly, but he doesn't remember them ever feeling this good)
The societal pressure to reply to this action in some way caught up to him fast, however. He was quick to place a hand on your waist, his range of motion being limited from your arms wrapping around his own. He may experience the social pressure, but he really has no clue what's appropriate and what isn't, huh? Cute.
(Had he a modicum of self control, he'd most definetly have had a much more timely and well adjusted response to your touch, but amidst the smell of your perfume, your soft arms around him, your hair tickling against his face, the feeling of your hands on his back... nothing carried the same weight as your presence did, who could blame him for doing what his mind instructed him to do and touch you back somehow? He'll come to find that he will blame himself very much for this interaction. No one more judgemental on his behaviors than the one responsible for them)
Once you pulled back from him, you were quick to usher them inside and offer them snacks, reasoning that they'd deserved something nice after studying and debating so much on so many topics. Your husband eagerly agreed and impatiently waited for your food through busying himself by unearthing blueprints and all sorts of different research papers so there would be grounds for his and ford's endless theorizing.
And thus, as you left, Stanford was left with his own thoughts. He made note of the fact that those very same thoughts were entirely consumed by you: how you dressed, how you looked, how soft your hair was, how lovely your voice sounded; all things that brought him much joy to think about, but equal parts of shame. He didn't necessarily want to have any such invasive thoughts about his professor's wife, yet there he is, with his thoughts growing more wretched by the minute. It's almost like his brain was against him: guiding thoughts that had him blushing at the very visage into his mind's eye. He wanted your hands on his back again- he wanted you to drag your nails across it-- he wanted to feel your lips on his, he wanted to feel your breath grow shaky against him--
"Here it is!! Sorry for the wait"
Papers getting dropped on the table and a thankful sigh were the next things he heard. His professor turned to him, instructing him to sit at the table, since "if you don't come quick, there won't be any left for you!"
Your food was great, simply regarded as the usual to your husband, but seen as the world's 8th wonder by Stanford. When asked if he was enjoying the food, he quickly assured you that he was absolutely enjoying it, making sure to remark that it is "the best thing he's had since he entered college", which was not at all a lie, considering he was surviving off of microwaved cup noodles and the occasional granola bar- but even he knew that was too pathetic for him to mention at all.
Your husband and Stanford made quick work of the snacks and promptly got back to... spewing big pompous words and numbers at eachother... at least it seems they were having fun, considering they'd laugh toguether on occasion. That must be a good sign? You weren't entirely sure what was happening with those 2, and you took to not interrupting them in lest you break their chain of thought.
The afternoon went by in the blink of an eye to them. Discussions on various theories followed by reading research papers followed by sketching on blueprints followed by more reading research papers. It was their passion, it seems. However, ford was greatly saddened that it was already so late- he knew full well that if he stayed any longer he'd end up spending the night on your couch, so both him and his professor agreed that it was very much time for him to go back to campus snd consequently to the dorms.
Of course, that wasn't going to happen before he got to say goodbye to you. Even if he was embarrassed to look you in the eye after a full day of... various thoughts about you, he couldn't seem to get enough of your presence. Making his way towards the front door, you were the only one who accompanied him, since your husband was quite busy organizing the mess him and his pupil had created throughout the day.
As you stood at the doorway, you saw yourself growing quite sorrowful that he'd be leaving already, he was quite interesting to you. However, nothing could have prepared neither you nor him for what he did next. He turned around to face you once more, seemingly debating something in his mind for an instant. But, just as quickly as his uncertainty was noticed, it vanished, being replaced by a conviction and fervor he didn't expect from himself -his self control seemed to disappear when he was with you- .Thus, he gently took a hold of your hand and brought it up to his height, kissing the back of it lightly. You could feel your heart skip a beat; you hadn't experienced any such romantic gestures in... god knows how long. As he pulled back, you spoke.
"I-it was... lovely meeting you Stanford." You squeezed his hand as you took a step forward. As soon as he returned your sentiment, he was gone. Though, in the look you both shared during those brief moments, you both knew this wasn't going to be the last time he'd be in this house.
You'd both make sure of it.
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Stanford's professor after ford practically begged to go back to his house again: "did you really like her cooking that much?"
Stanford, sweating profusely: "yeah.. her.. . Cooking......"
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turtleblogatlast · 6 months ago
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Shockingly underrated thing about Leo is that he’s legitimately charming when he wants to be?
He’s the Faceman! He’s persuasive! That’s not just some random title he gave himself with no backing to it. People will listen to him. Even if they think he’s being annoying or if they’re upset at him, people listen to him anyway! There’s a reason his bros push him out front to talk to people, and when this happens, that talking nearly always works.
Moreover, Leo knows people. He looks at them and takes into account how they act and what they’re like as he makes his way through the conversations. It’s easy to forget this aspect of Leo’s character because he only brings it out when he really needs (read: wants) to, but it really is a notable part of him that always love to see.
And I say charm in particular because he has a knack for not only getting people to pay attention, but for getting people to stay and listen to what he has to say.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#I feel like people equate Leo to a lot of loud gross boy behavior instead of looking at his actual accomplishments#which fair enough#he IS a loud gross boy a lot of the time#but his charisma really deserves a mention for how much it comes in clutch#that one cut animatic of the other people in the resistance wanting Leo to join them for karaoke like#and yes those inspiring speeches he gives his fam are also an example of charm#bro has! charisma! he can have his loser moments and at the same time show off how to manipulate through words#Leo knows people and if he really wants to he can talk them up#but yeah like - I see people calling him the face man a lot but not so much taking into account what that entails#he’s got a pretty face! and he’ll do the talking a lot! but that’s not all a face man is#another thing that is SHOCKINGLY underrated in fandom is Raph loving fighting???#I have no idea why but I feel like I don’t see this mentioned enough#he adores wrestling and roughhousing and training and just FIGHTING in general plz let my boy punch something#I have more I wanna say but it’ll have to wait until later it is very late haaa#anyway my main point behind this post is that Leo knows people and in turn knows what they WANT#it is this same perception that makes him REALLY GOOD at getting under people’s skin too#people skills and adaptability really make sense when you take into account the fact that he’s a red eared slider#it really is cool to see how much this part of Leo is addressed throughout the series#nearly always in very lowkey ways
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gaymurdersalad · 3 months ago
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[ Hey guys.
Let’s clear one thing up within the first sentence here: Blog is not cancelled! Chribs is just at school doing school things!
Y’all know how it was last year. Unmediated ADD and school do not mix as I’m sure several of you are well aware. I am currently on fall break which is why I am able to post this at all! Soon though, I’m gonna have to get back on the grind and hit several more scholarship applications and several more lessons so I don’t completely explode during my college music audition. Fun stuff!
Thank you all for bearing with me. It still shocks me to see notifications when I’ve been inactive for so long, but leave it up to y’all to make me feel like the specialist orange motherfucker on the market.
More to come! I promise! Good luck on your respective school years, jobs, lives, whatever has you! See you when Jack Kennedy inevitably grabs me in a chokehold and forces me to draw him once more! ]
~ Mod Chribs, sipping a Redbull
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h0estar · 9 months ago
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DAMIAN????????????? ARE YOU GOOD BRO??????????????
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ethrealilies · 3 months ago
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Gotta love how I got Moominmamma and a cottagecore photo as my profile banner sort of and then we got me pulling up punch out stuff Lmao
Anyways random stuff under the cut (punch our Frl invading my brain)
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sciderman · 9 months ago
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Do you think Peter learned how to breakdance when he got his powers just to add flare to his movement?
i think peter parker had been trying and failing to breakdance long before the spider-bite, and is just happy to discover he finally has the upper body strength to actually pull it off now
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poisonousquinzel · 6 months ago
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I had somethin' great to go home to.
"Harley! You're okay! I had the police scanner on and heard they booked you.
I was ready to cave that whole building in with a sample of aspergillus to get you out, but I knew you'd get yourself out in time to teach."
little miss cop is lucky Harley didn't mention the police brutality at the beginning of the chapter cause Ivy would have caved that building in for that alone if she knew !!!!!!
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"My baby girl was never the same after she saw you girls out robbing banks, pouting in your mug shots like it was a game." skill issue
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lady's daughter saw pretty women committing crimes, robbing banks and being cool and wanted to be like them. idk maybe you should try not being so lame and boring and corrupt :)
Harley Quinn (2021 - ) #41
Writer: Tini Howard
Artist: Sweeney Boo
Letterer: Steve Wands
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krakhatoa · 2 months ago
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the mfers too stupid to use their goddamn brains and are instead blaming third party voters when Harris would NOT have won even if every single third party voter in the swing states went to her just shows how stupid you bitches be and refuse to ACKNOWLEDGE THAT A PARTY DELIBERATELY ALLOWING A FOREIGN COUNTRY TO CONTROL THEM IS THE FUCKING ISSUE THAT LEAD TO THIS LOSS
do some goddamn math with the data IN FRONT OF YOU TO SEE ITS NOT THE THIRD PARTY VOTERS BUT THE LIBS AND DEMS ALIENATION OF PPL CARING FOR HUMAN RIGHTS THAT LEAD TO THIS LOSS
#I’m on mobile and work a full time job with two kids to take care of but would give you fucking tables of this data if that will help your#empty heads process it but if you look at ANY ELECTORAL MAP OF THE FUCKING VOTES YOU WOULD RECOGNIZE ITS HARRIS AND THE DEMS AT FAULT IF YOU#if you understand or hold any sort of basic empathy and instead of wishing death or poor health on the people who voted (or not at all) for#conscious given how you mfers are currently run by a DEM majority who allowed the leveling off of Gaza AND NOW THE GREATER MIDDLE EAST that#maybe you’d understand that YOU and your loser ass party is the reason for this loss#the fact that this loser ass party never stops the gerrymandering that occurs nationwide; the fact that this loser ass party refused to#codify roe v wade; the fact that this loser ass party half assed barely attempted to eliminate the student debt and even then not at all#really; it’s the fact that Dems pitch themselves as the moral one then laugh when someone asks why the WH refuses to stop the fucking CRATER#SIZED HOLES ISNOTREAL HAS CREATED IN GAZA that lost the Dems not the abstainers not the third parties but the lack of empathy and humility#in the party’s leadership that they couldn’t even LIE in the days leading up to the election to try and sway the vote#you fucking bitching cunts BETTER be protesting otherwise you have done nothing but LIED abt what u lib ass losers stand for#I’m abt to start looking into what pro RCV orgs I’ve got near me to put that shit on a ticket as many times as possible until it’s approved#so third parties slowly get a fucking chance u lil whining punching down racist cunts
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letoscrawls · 2 years ago
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The Mandalorian 3x03
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waterunder-thebridge · 7 days ago
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screaming barking wailing eating the teeth i knock out of my own head sawing my legs off tearing out my hair and fingernails clawing my stomach open and sticking my head in there
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inspiteofganon · 2 months ago
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I already said it on Twitter but it bears repeating here: I think it's really charming when people invent OCs to ship Ganondorf with/ship themselves with Ganondorf. Like heck yes!! Kiss him!! Be his little pogchamp!! I admire the passion! It's really cute.
Maybe someday, I might sharpen my boldness enough to have LoZ OCs of mine do the same, and maybe even draw and show it here. Someday. Maybe.
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sleepy-crypt1d · 11 months ago
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love people making jack this suave sexy put together badass like babe we are talking about a man who canonically wont say fuck and says "yahtzee" when hes excited
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saturnniidae · 10 months ago
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Hiccup the typa guy to go "errmm actually 🤓" when someone gets a dragon fact wrong
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skinnypaleangryperson · 11 months ago
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Wow, incredible. Back to back from night to morning I read the most unnecessarily rude, abrasive thoughts from a thread on Rick and Morty Reddit, and in the morning and even worse one from BoJack Horseman read (unsurprising, since they're always the worst). When it comes to these communities and the complete lack of "morality"when it comes to these parts of the modern world I'm starting to wonder if I'm in complete hell. When I rent about it on other platforms I'm much, much more deservingly abrasive about the way that these literal absolute abrasive terrible clones are constantly coming out with every day of their life like it's the same person with a different account in a slightly different body, but what's disturbing is that it actually is a different person every time despite the fact that they all have the same exact a morbidly terrible cheap awful malicious personality.
Of course it would be the two things that all of my passion projects, daydreams, and want for community have poured into for the past couple of years. It can't be a coincidence that the most morbidly unnecessarily rude, hypocritical, terrible and attempt at being "abrasive" people would be on these reddit communities. Obviously most of them are self-projecting or are being rude to complete strangers on TV show Reddit communities of all things, and the fact that they have even one minute in their life to do something so low and scummy the way that these people do just goes to show the kind of people that these people are in that they shouldn't be worth worrying about much less being affected by. They wish they had that kind of power.
Still-I've been inwardly 😬😬😬😬 for the past 24 hours. I don't even look at a single comment on these Reddit communities anymore because I know it's just full of either repetitive boring g***bage, or full of people that are so rude and terrible on top of that g****bage that you can't even believe that these people can even function. Every single day it's like they're trying to outdo themselves from how unnecessarily hypocritical, rude, and unnecessarily morbidly distasteful they are, and that's the generous Tumblr exquisite way of putting it, that they are with their excuses for what they call words.
It's amazing that no matter how much you tell these people that no one cares and to not bother their people with their low quality awful rude abrasive unjustified thoughts that nobody wants except for people as low as them, and no matter how many of these clones that I block they just keep coming out like little bugs battering at my face.
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b1mbodoll · 1 year ago
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to the rude fuckin loser that just sent me a mean ass ask 😭😭😭 are you not embarrassed? ur saying its embarrassing that im upset over hatemail but if you got that shit repeatedly im sure you’d be upset too…???
LOL and thanks for sending that in cus it just proves to me that ur nothing but a bitchless, friendless, fucking coward 😭 ur acting all tough and thinkin ur a hardass for sending alllll that bullshit on ANON!!!!! like youre a little loser, lets be so serious. i know it and so do you 😭😭 if you really bout this shit say it off fucking anonymous like a real bitch so i can block you 😭😭 talkin all big n bad just to hide behind the anonymous option 😭 yeah okay LMAO!!!!!! like why r u do scared to come off anon what am i gonna do to you ??? punch you with an EMOJI??? 👊👊👊 like lets be serious ur a cowardly fuckin loser ass freak with no life and ur taking it out on me 😭 jealousy is a fucken disease and for you im afraid its a chronic case 🫶
trying to shame me for having feelings and then proceeding to say you hope i end up in a ditch? ur fucking pathetic!!! and trying to invalidate my sexuality? 😭 bitch YOU DONT FUCKING KNOW ME!!!! god damn you are a fuckin weirdo. do not speak to me or step to me like you know me bc at the end of the day, you’re nobody!!!! you are not my friend, you are not someone that knows me, so dont act like you do. you have no fucking right to invalidate me or my sexuality i seriously cannot believe you’re really trying to speak for me and tell me MY SEXUALITY?? calling me bi and disrespectin me for WHAT?? does spewing hate like a miserable cunt give you such a rush? is that it? its so funny to me like as if id listen to a pitiful fuckin asswipe like you 😭
im so sick of you little fucking freaks trying to walk all over me just because im sensitive and kind. fuck you and ur fuckin mama bitch🖕suck my dick and kiss my fucking ass thank you very much.
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