#GET OUT OF MY HOUSE BETHESDA

[yharnamesque]

As someone who unfortunately REALLY didn't like the turn the story took in Doom Eternal, I think the only way the new game will convince me is if it's:

a) about doing the final demon cleanup and attempting to properly rebuild humanity in the aftermath, hence the "dark age" part of the title

b) has a fishing minigame

Hasn't my man done enough by this point does he not deserve to crack open a cold one and reel in some fucked up looking demon fish for like five minutes in his busy schedule

[totsandnuggsrebloggs]

Hey folks!!!!! I thought it would be real neat to try out polls for the first time so how about I test it out??????

Which could it possibly be????? Can you guess??? It’s pretty hard huh???? There’s so many ✨options✨ :) <- their eye is twitching

[violetclarity]

me: wow it's so nice that my friends that live far away often end up visiting a city adjacent to mine, giving me the opportunity to see them when I otherwise wouldn't!

also me: bitches and moans every time I have to haul ass into dc or nova to see said friends

[thefallenangelsgang]

Fuck it, I'm throwing my hat on the ring about the Emil announcing Nate from Fallout 4 is the bystander Soldier in the Fallout 1 opener.

First and foremost, it was a stupid thing to say. As he backtracks to later, the conceit of Fallout's protags is they are supposed to be anyone (and that issue is precisely why some people hate the extensive prewar character background given to you in Fallout 4). For the lead writer to pull a JK Rowling (why would you do that? None of those went over well) is such a major marketing misstep that it wouldn't surprise me if Emil gets reprimanded for it before we even get into the implication of what he said.

Emil your voice is as good as God when it comes to the canon. You can't just say shit like that and expect it to go well. Especially considering the implications.

Speaking of the implications, I'm not mad about Nate being a war criminal. It's a coloring I actually would welcome if the games discussed concepts like Capitalism, Racism, and War in any meaningful way anymore. And if Emil also didn't say this.

Fallout's canon is rooted in reality. That is part of its whole thing. It's fun to do goofy shit like becoming the Silver Shroud and having a make believe superhero fight with the Mechanist or write a woman obsessed with Nuka Cola so much she traverses two games to basically kidnap the CEO's cryogenically preserved head so she can talk to him for all eternity, but the setting is very much rooted in reality.

You aren't dealing with fictional countries, you aren't dealing with fictional races, you aren't dealing with fictional hypotheticals. That is The Elder Scrolls job. You are dealing with actual countries, actual racism, actual history, and actual fucking politics. You have to be mindful of what you are doing and saying. You can't just do things because it's an interesting plot device without first thinking about the implications.

Fallout's world is a heightened version of our own, a path we seem to stumble towards with ever passing year unless we do something about it. It fucking sucks. I'm sure writing it feels like prophesizing the future and eats your soul a bit. It would mine. But that doesn't mean Fallout can just take a sharp left in terms of story and reality and get away with it.

To have Nate be the bystander Soldier and then meet him when he has a very good thing going for him (an expensive house during an inflation crisis, a robot butler, he gets into a vault for free for fucks sake) very much speaks to life rewarding him for his crimes. There is no hatred in his words when he looks at the flag of the country that made him kill innocents. His speech is speaks of remorse for leaving his family and the cycle of war, it does not speak of the horrors. Of watching you comrades bleed out in the Anchorage snow. Of the scream of shells overhead. Of the fear in civilians eyes as your buddy puts a bullet between them.

You all have to see how it looks like the man is fine with what he had to do during the war, right?

Not interacting with these concepts enough paints a picture of apathy and acceptance. In this day and age where being keeping the government honest and responsible for their actions is so important, that isn't going to slide without it being EXTREMELY purposeful, which it is not. It's tone deaf and lazy.

I respect a lot of what Emil has done in the past, but I am not above keeping him culpable when he has something so delicate in his hands. I hope this situation is what he needed to get his head on straight, or is the light bulb moment where he realizes he needs to pass the torch onwards. There is no shame in subject matter becoming too much as time goes on. There is shame in letting a previously critical series become the very thing it was criticizing.

He is going to keep getting dragged until he realizes that or he manages to convince the fans to be complicit in the degradation of setting. In doing so he is going to lose Bethesda most of its biggest fans who well and truly love the series and what it stands for.

But that's just my take, and I'm just a kid who studies polisci and history and can't shield myself from the inherent horror of nuclear war no matter how much I try.

War really never changes

[the-californicationist]

Good Fences (Fluffuary #24)

FEB24: Gift Giving

Christmas morning came early. John had woken you up with his kisses and his warmth, and begged you to come sit under the tree with him. You giggled, groggy and exhausted, yawning in your robe, still half-asleep. 

“John,” you sighed, “I thought we said no presents this year?”

“Sure,” he chuckled, “Is that why there are nearly ten boxes down here with my name across them?”

You blushed, shaking your head, 

“I’m sure you already know what those are. Besides, one of them is socks!”

“Sit, missus. Santa insists.”

You followed him to the floor, snuggling against him, 

“Alright, Mr. Claus. What is so urgent?”

He lifted a small box from the low branches of the tree, careful not to disturb the glittering glass ornaments, and handed it to you. It was light, but there was something sturdy about the structure of the container. You eyed him carefully,

“What did you do?”

He smiled, petting you lovingly along your back and shoulders,

“Heard your wish, and I made it come true.”

You ripped off the wrapping and cracked open the box to reveal a shining gold key. There was a green paper tag on the ring that read: 2323 Birdsong Street.

Suddenly, you realized what he had done. 

Ever since he had come home, you and John had been pitching the idea about officially moving into a house together just outside of Bethesda. You’d shared homes back and forth on all the realty apps, and you’d even looked at a few apartments, just in case the housing situation fell through. But, you’d fallen in love with one that was decidedly outside of your price range. 

You shouldn’t have even been looking at it. John had told you bits and pieces about his finances, but you were shocked when he sent you this one as a recommendation, thinking no one would have enough money for it — not even a decorated military captain. There was no way you could afford a five bedroom that sat on two acres along the Potomac. It was insane to even consider it.

2323 Birdsong was a remodeled Colonial, but other than updating the necessities and fixing what was broken, the owners had done an incredible job of keeping it as original as possible. The dark woodwork and crown molding made each room feel cozy and homey, and you could just imagine spending the holidays there with John and all of your friends. He opined about fishing in the river, and you fantasized about all of the fun you might have together in front of the fireplace. It was just a dream.

And now, it was yours. 

“John! We can’t… I know I told you that I loved the house, but I can’t afford it. I don’t know how…”

He grabbed your neck gently in his big, warm hand and put your forehead on his. Then, he kissed you, keeping your words from pouring out. He whispered softly, 

“Got it for you, love. You don’t owe me anything. I’ve decided to hang up my hat for good, and now that I’m retired, I’m yours to command. Proper house husband, ready for his honey-do lists.”

“I don’t know what to say,” you gasped, reeling from the shock. 

He chuckled, kissing you again,

“Wanna go see it? Maybe we can give the bedroom a test run.”

You laughed, nodding your head, nearly racing to get dressed. You weren’t sure if you were looking forward to the house, or to John’s idea of a test run, but you were eager for both to be yours.

AO3 Link

[moodcrab]

Fixing Skyrim's Daedric Quests

Introduction

Unlike my Oblivion character - a mere mortal who stumbled upon a shrine while lost in the wilderness, becomes somewhat obsessed with gaining the level requirement and collecting an offering, then undertakes the quest feeling like a dark god is testing their worthiness to be their champion - The Last Dragonborn has Daedric Princes falling over themselves to make them their champion straight out the gate. Level one? Who cares! No offering? No problem! Not my Summoning Day? We haven't cared about that since Morrowind! Literally told me to go fuck myself? Take the prize anyway Champ you've earned it!

Basically, much like factions, Skyrim shoves nearly all of the Daedric Quests in the player's face as soon as possible because they're widely considered to be the best and most rewarding by fans of the previous games. But the older games had them, to varying degrees, hidden away or locked behind mechanics, and Bethesda didn't want newer, more casual fans to miss them. In doing so the Princes and their cults lose that air of mystery and danger they once had.

On the other hand, it was nice to be doing something else entirely then have a surprise Daedric Quests blind side me, and it's not like the old Oblivion way was perfect. Find shrine, give offering, get quest for EVERY Prince? And just one quest and I'm the champion, dedicated my soul to your afterlife and all that jazz?

This series is going to try to maximise the good parts of Skyrim Daedric Quests, while bringing back some of the classic elements that it left out, starting with...

Part I - Namria

Quest A) A Taste of Death.

If you visit the Treasury House in Markarth you might overhear an argument between Brother Verulus and Thongvor Silver-Blood. This location change means you are unlikely to just run into this quest immediately as in vanilla, but also gives you a high chance of encountering it during The Forsworn Conspiracy, in which case it has the double benefit of acting as a kind of red herring in that quest and linking this quest with Markarth's corruption and secret society vibes.

Brother Verulus wants the city guard to stop their lockdown of the Halls of the Dead and to actually go in and deal with the draugr head on (in my alternative "Fixed" Skyrim the increased draugr population is connected with Alduin's return, who is raising his Dragon Priests to serve him, even within cities). Why doesn't he go pester the Jarl or the Captain about this, asks Thongvor, dismissively. Oh come on, don't act coy, we all know who really controls the guard in Markarth, why not let them do their job, replies Verulus. Thongvor counters that that would be a desecration of the Nordic dead, that guards putting them down like a pest would be dishonourable. What's more, perhaps if the glorious Nordic dead of the city weren't being tended to by a poncy Imperial Priest of Arkay instead of a proper old fashioned Orkey Shaman, maybe none of this would have happened. Verulus starts to lose his temper at this, and in anger implies that he knows that the draugr problem that plagues the other cities isn't the real issue here, that most of the ancient dead here are Reachfolk not Nord, and begins to demand a true explanation for being locked out but stops himself, he has said too much and leaves.

The quest begins by talking to Verulus who will ask you to investigate what's really going on in The Halls of the Dead. How you get in is up to you. If you're a sneaky type or a smooth talker you'll get in that way. You can also commit a crime to lure the guard away maybe. You could go find Thongvor who can be convinced to give you an alternative - take care of Verulus, but more on that later.

However you get into the Halls, on entering you start finding evidence of cannibalism, butchered bodies, cooking stations and so on. As you delve deeper you hear Eola, a Reachman Namira Devotee, goading and teasing you; "Not many would walk blindly into a crypt, smelling of steel and blood, but not fear... Don't you see what I am about down here in the dark? Is that disgust? Revulsion?... Or curiosity? Why don't you come deeper, and scratch that itch?" You can question her about who she is, what is her purpose here, why is Thongvor protecting her etc. but it will come down to convincing her to leave, killing her, or accepting her invitation to eat human flesh.

Now, IF you sided with Thongvor, the plan is to lie to Verulus to get him to follow you into the Halls of the Dead, this time you'll be confronted directly by Eola and Thongvor together. They intend to kill and eat you both and blame your deaths on Draugr. You can fight your way out and try to save Verulus, or you can prove yourself by killing Verulus yourself and tasting him by way of a test.

If you partake in cannibalism you will get a monologue from Eola about Namira, waxing poetic about the oldest god, The Black Fly, being the Daedric Prince of decay and squalor and all things ugly and repulsive... But also her significance to the Reachmen. To them she is the Spirit Queen who is the true god of death, not Arkay, the primal darkness that gives and takes life. You will gain the power to feast on a corps once a night or when underground, and unlock the second quest.

Quest B - A Guest for Dinner

The second quest will be even less obvious to the player and will hopefully take most people completely by surprise the first time it happens. The quest will only begin after the following criteria are met: You have used the lesser power to consume 10 or more corpses. You own a fully furnished player home. You spend the night there with either your spouse or a follower. When you sleep, a slow, loud, ominous knocking at the door awakens you.

At your door is a stranger in rags and a hideous face asking to come in. You can refuse or invite them to stay. Once inside they will take a seat at your table and ask what is being served for dinner. At this point your follower/spouse will be freaking out a little. You can offer food, like regular food, which will disappoint him and he'll leave. You can offer your spouse or follower as the meal and you'll have to attack them, the screen will darken for an gruesome audible muckbang. Or you can tell the Stranger he is on the menu, which will please him greatly and he will warn you against choking on him, depending on the disposition of your specific follower or spouse they will either join in or abandon you forever.

The Stranger, if he survives the night, will give you the Ring of Namira as thanks. If you ate him Eola, who incidentally will now double as a replacement spouse/follower, will arrive and give you the Ring. The Ring is a powerful reflect damage/magic ring, a unique enchantment in Skyrim.

[malwaredykes]

I know you mostly post about fnv but I'm curious to know whats your opinion on the other fallouts?

fallout - really Really REALLY good. unforgiving, yes, takes some time getting used to. not without its flaws of course. for example i couldnt for the life of me figure out some very basic shit at first because the UI was designed by rodents i think. very Very engaging once you get past all of that. phenomenal first entry in the series. music, plot, worldbuilding, themes, major characters, mwah. mwah. They Dont Make Em Like That Anymore and there are many good reasons for it but time passed doesnt disappear so you can always play classic fallout.

fallout 2 - thing get weird. some of the highest highs, some of the lowest lows. the highs are really high though. unfortunately has a particular kind of needless edginess to it that gets extremely tiresome. "heeheehhee SECKS *begins to warp violently* heeiiuhehyehye" type. bizarrely racist and misogynistic at many points. contains some of the best voice acting moments in video game history. at many points its just very very tedious, like if with fo1 at some points i was like Well this is kinda rough, with fo2 there were stretches of the game where i was like What the hell am i even doing here Who are these people what is this crap. the enclave as this games evil fucked up faction is so great i love how theyre gradually introduced and then shit hits the fan. has a lot of texture to its worldbuilding and some really good fun moments but again it goes off the rails so much. i rly need to replay it but every time im like God do i really have time for this. i love that you drive a car

fallout 3 - weird fucking game. some truly unjustifiable design and worldbuilding decisions despite having also introduced a lot of rly good things. fun gameplay i mean its that classic falloublivionrim buggy grimy versatile ps3 pure brick ass gravel gamebryo bethesda. VERY funny to have so much of the games plot be like I Gotta Find My Dad like girl i dont care about my dad he can go die. oh wait he does. it has what i call The Martin Septim Problem and i think its kind of self explanatory. fawkes best boy hes my little birthday boy. fun to explore and do your own thing and discover whatevers going on out there. i HATE the brotherhood of steel in fallout the third. i HATE the enclave in fallout the third but i dont think it even comes close to how much i hate the brotherhood of steel in this game and what precedent it set for the rest of bethesda fallout. these creeps. im supposed to find any of this awesome? fuck no. oh also im ENDLESSLY amused by the prologue its like a nightmare sequence akskfnckxjnc. im being BORN?? ive just slid out of my mothers WOMB and CERVIX and VAGINA and theyre bringing up a screen to show her what an ugly monstrosity im gonna be when i grow up and shes like Waoww and she dies??? im a TODDLER? Release Me. Unhand Me You Fool. oh also that sequence where youre in a CRAZY SCIENTISTS SIMULATION is so stupid i love it

fallout 4 - havent played it for longer than 15 minutes (made me barfy). everything i learn about it is bizarre. like WHAT the fuck happens in that game. your old wrinkly son tells you youre stupid and dont need to know anything hes doing and then is like im dying can you take over for me??? also the intro is truly something i mean i dont mind having Some backstory to my character but youre saying i had to be straight married with a baby and living in a nice suburb, with a robot house servant? fuck no

everything else i havent played and have no real Thoughts about

[lowqualitygarbage]

More Vault 666 quick drawings based on minor character trivia, featuring:

Husk was born and raised in New Vegas, it’s kind of a mystery why he left the Mojave and came to the Wasteland, but the weather difference (and ghouls being shit at temperature regulation) is why he’s usually bundled up 

(except I just googled the timeline and apparently the strip has only been active for less than a decade? So either I have to make him way older or pretend Mr. House got off his ass super early in this AU)

Angel Dust never wants to take off his boots around others because he is embarrassed by his missing toes (birth defect, accident, amputation, Val shot them off in a fit of rage? who knows, he’s not talking)

Alastor uses my absolute favorite Bethesda build and is a high-charisma stealth/sniper character. He can talk his way out of 99% of problems if he wants to, and the rest he simply vanishes and aerates their skulls from a distance

Vaggie is not comfortable showing lots of skin, even with Charlie for some mysterious reason

Adam is a douchey greaser out of his armor

Army of Righteous commanders get power armor, rank and file have something between Brotherhood flightsuits and Enclave hazmat suits

They have a tradition of etching the X onto the helmet after their first dozen kills as a status symbol

[crazycurly-77]

Memory Loss - Chapter 1

The four of you prepared to enter the house of the suspect you were looking for. Tim and Tony should enter from the backdoor and Gibbs and you would enter through the front door. 

At the command from Gibbs you all entered while shouting “NCIS! Federal Agents!” You checked all the rooms, but nobody was there. After all rooms were declared clear Gibbs ordered you “search the house for any hints where he can be.”

You fanned out to do as you were told as was Gibbs himself. Suddenly he stood still and listened while murmuring “there is something ticking.” You observed him slowly following the faint sound. 

Then everything happened very rapidly. 

Gibbs turned to the door yelling “there's a bomb! Run! Get out of here immediately!”

Everyone ran as fast as possible and managed to get out of the building. You yourself landed face forward in the grass and tried to protect your head. Shortly after your landing you felt a heavy weight land on your back. 

Then there was a loud bang, fire, smoke and debris all around you. You tried to stand up, but you couldn't. The weight on your back was too heavy. It was pressing you into the ground, but you couldn't see what it was. Luckily Tim and Tony came running towards you. “Oh my god, Y/N! Gibbs! Are you okay?” Tony asked. 

“Yes, but I can't stand up because of the heavy weight laying on me” you answered. 

Tim looked at you and said “the firefighters and the ambulance are on their way, so hold on.”

“Okay. But please free me.”

Tony kneeled before you and spoke softly “please don't freak out. Gibbs is laying on top of you and he is unconscious. Apparently he tried to protect you and was hit hardly on the head. He's bleeding profusely. We will try to get him off you without hurting him further. So please stay calm.”

You gasped in shock “okay. Try your best.”

Then you were released and stood up. You checked Tim, Tony and yourself, but fortunately the three of you had only a few bruises, but you had to assure yourself, so you asked them “are you okay?” Both nodded “yes.” “Thank God” you sighed, but you abruptly held your breath as you looked at Gibbs who was lying before you, still unconscious and bleeding very hard on the head. Apart from that, he seemed to have only minor bruises such as the rest of you. That was a small relief, but despite that your blood ran cold as you saw his seemingly lifeless body, all the blood and his pale face and you were trembling all over. 

The whole team was battered and bruised, but Gibbs had been hit the hardest and you were all very grateful as the ambulance arrived. They came at the same time as the firefighters and ran towards you. 

“What happened?” asked the chief of the men.

“I'm Tony Dinozzo and I called you. We were investigating this house and then a bomb went off.”

“Is anybody still in there?”

“Not that I know.”

“Okay.” the fireman nodded and went away yelling commands to his squad. 

While Tony spoke to the chief of the firemen, Tim and you spoke to the ambulance and answered the same question. 

“What happened?” 

“We were in this house and discovered a bomb. We could save ourselves barely from the blow by running out of it. 

“Okay. Anybody besides him injured?”

“Only a few bruises, but he was hit the hardest. I guess he tried to protect our colleague and was hit on the head by something hard.”

“Was he conscious when you found him?” 

“No.”

“Did he gain consciousness at any time?” 

“No.”

“Okay. Then you will all come back to the hospital to check on you.”

Then he walked over to his partner who examined Gibbs. 

“What did you find?” 

“His vital signs are weak and he has lost a lot of blood. Besides that he has a lot of minor bruises, but seemingly no broken bones. I have managed to stop the bleeding.”

“Good. Not good. We will take him to the hospital for further examination and treatment.”

“Where will you bring him?” Tony came to you and asked. 

“Bethesda. And you will drive behind us to get examined, too.”

“Will do.”

The fireman did their jobs, Gibbs was brought into the ambulance and the rest of you got into the car for the drive to the hospital. 

You were all shaken and silent because of the shock of what had happened and of the worries for your boss. 

That was the hardest on this job, when one of your own was injured or even killed. 

And now you had to fear for your boss.

(To be continued...)

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Here you will find the other chapters of this story and the other stories I've written to date.

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Tags: @ilovemark1951, @hobby27

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[papakhan]

Episode 1

Fuck it, I'm gonna do it anyway. Here's all the notes I took when watching episode 1 of the godawful fallout tv show. enjoy. I'm gonna run through this with notes I made while I watched the show so formatting might be kinda weird, I haven't done anything like this before so bare with me. I will try to explain things as if you the reader have not seen the show. This is gonna be very long and heavy on the hate and the spoilers.

Content warnings:

rape

incest

gif of the fight scene violence

self harming

Things I liked:

Vault Dwellers reusing the same wedding dress and everyone who'd worn it writing their names on the inside. that's sweet

"don't lose your head" vault poster during a firefight

Johnny Cash

I like Brotherhood Clerics but they totally fucked up the ranking system

The vault dwellers just painting over the blood on the walls

Horses are canon now

Goofy wasteland urban legends like "a feral ghoul does not abide a chicken"

That's literally it. Now it's time for everything else. I'll break it down into character bits since that's what the show does

Cooper

So Cooper Cowboy ghoul man is divorced and he's at this birthday party in I'm guessing Hollywood overlooking LA. It's a beautiful sunny day :) Bare in mind that in this scene the nukes drop so Bethesda has already fucked their own lore of the nukes dropping at 9:40am in Boston would mean that it should be 6:40am in California. Sunrise in California in October is 7am, btw. So already we're fucked. Real "design documents are a waste of time" behaviour on display here.

Anyway, nuke goes off. Now let me ask you something. What's one of the most infamous things about nuclear bombs? The flash, right? A nuclear explosion is bright enough to blind a person. Fallout 4 understood this, at least a little, where the flash of light from the bomb would fill your screen even if you weren't facing it, which is how nukes work. Closing your eyes in the face of a nuke would be pointless because the light would pass through your eyelids. There's even reports of people who held up their hands to shield the light and could see THEIR BONES THROUGH THEIR HANDS. That's how bright they are. They are horrifying weapons of mass destruction.

The nuke that hits LA is not a nuke, the flash of light on Janey's face (cooper's kid and the ONE SINGLE PERSON who notices a NUCLEAR FUCKING BOMB) is more akin to a camera flash. again. she is the only fucking person who notices a nuclear bomb go off, everyone else at the party is distracted by a TV of all things.

In the time between the ""flash"" of the bomb here's everything that happens before Cooper and co feel the shockwave

Janey notices the pathetic flash and looks up.

She holds up her thumb in the "vault boy" way

Cooper comes out of the house and walks over to Janey

He crouches down beside her and says some bullshit along the lines of "i got some cake for my favourite cowgirl"

Janey says "was it your thumb or my thumb?"

Cooper looks towards the source of the nuke and slowly stands up, watching it for a moment

He says "that's just a fire janey" as the smoke unfurls into a very obvious mushroom cloud

He realises that it was not. just a fire

then they get hit by a shockwave

This takes almost a full minute and none of the segments is supposed to be slow motion. Listen I know that light moves faster than sound and heat but come on. It's way too slow and also. dead fucking silent. also the shockwave comes before the mushroom cloud but who cares.

Anyway cooper gets on a horse with the girl and rides off down the road in the direction of LA. good job dude.

I've already read up about yknow who it was who wanted the nukes fired and I know that it was Barb who wanted the nukes dropped on America for?? vault tec profit??? so uh. why did she let Janey go to a birthday party with Cooper?

Lucy

x3 Incest jokes may not seem like a lot but it was 3 too many for me. I hate the "good karma" noise that played when Lucy got arranged married. I said I liked the vault poster of "don't lose your head" but I hate the way Lucy keeps getting her inspiration from Vault Boy I'm sorry but its annoying and dumb to me. Interconnected vaults in LA is also. dumb. you're telling me The Master didn't notice these fucking things? you're kidding. Look at it, it's not even hidden in a cave or anything its just out in the open.

Way to retroactively make the Master look like a moron, though I know they do this to Mr House later on. ugh.

Her intro makes it sound like she's supposed to have Tagged Skills in repair, speech and science but she displays none of this in the later episodes I have seen, in fact her speech seems like utter dogshit so what was the point in introducing her in a "game protag" way if none of that was gonna get used later?

Anyway, lets get onto the raiders. If you know me, you know I love raiders. They're a cool and interesting critique of individualism and "might makes right" and also aesthetically just kind of fuck.

Now, knowing what I know about Moldaver and her being the current ?leader of the NCR remnants, that implies that the people she has led into Vault 33 are former NCR citizens or soldiers, right? right?

So the ""fall of shady sands"" according to the show is 2277 and yeah sure okay that's during new vegas' time and sure okay right todd howard promised that this didn't de-canonise fallout new vegas. however. it's 2296 meaning it's been 19 years since Shady Sand's.......decline. and 15 years since New Vegas where we last saw the NCR. And i know that the NCR aren't exactly the good guys To suggest that in less than 20 years the citizens of shady sands have been reduced to Bethesda-style raiders who:

Are unable to use utensils such as knives and forks

Can't grow crops

Don't know how to use cups

Will rape a woman, wipe his dick on a curtain, and then try to murder said woman

Shoveling fistfuls of cake into their mouth during a firefight

Threatening a pregnant woman

In another episode one of these guys is interrogated/interviews and shows their asshole to the guy talking to him.

is fucking ludicrous

Anyway Monty looks like Jerma

RIP

Anywayyyy how come only Lucy's pipboy picked up on the radiation from these outsiders huh? everyone else was wearing a pipboy during the wedding, they sat next to each other, those geigar counters would have been going off. what? they had them on silent out of respect of a good Christian wedding? if you try to convince me that's the explanation I will eat your liver. Bethesda raider style

anyway no.2 girlypop (lucy) straight up pulls a knife out of her wound which is medical petpeeve no.9394328 for me but then its immediately resolved by a stimpak. I hate how stimpaks in the show are used exactly how they are in the game. I was under the impression that it was a video game mechanic and not how it actually worked in the narrative. What's next? Jet gives me extra action points or some shit? I'm so tired

the fight scene sucked. the choreography of the raider guy shooting a vault dweller through the head of another vault dweller just kind of looked like shit and seemed impractical, clearly just there to be like WOAH THATS COOL it wasn't cool it looked clunky and weird. do not fucking tell me that fallout is supposed to be clunky and weird I will kill you.

the doors cutting the raider in half was also dumb since its been routinely established that the dull and ominous "thunk. thunk. thunk" heard deep in the bowels of a vault is a door that's trying to close but there's something stuck under it, if they could just slice a whole man in half then they could cut through a table or skeleton in game. Also irl I'm a health and safety officer and that moment made my toes curl. lol

It jumps from Lucy to Max and then back to lucy but I'm just gonna continue talking about her shit here. quick fire round because I've been yapping too long already

Her little brother looks way too old to be acting like a teenager this much.

Chet (Lucy's cousin and ex boyfriend. gross) wants to come with her thank god he doesn't

why doesn't she give a shit about the sky

Why doesn't she give a shit about the ocean

Maximus

"stupid blimp is back" is at the very top of my notes, lol. anyway I still don't understand where they got this thing from

Latrines made out of stacks of tires is so dumb. like I cant even explain how dumb that is. surely rubber has better use for that. surely. just shit in a hole in the ground like everyone else please for the love of god

I know the twist with Daine and let it be said, having your first on screen transgender character cut themselves with razors to get out of the military is not, in fact, Bethesda trying to be on the side of transgender people, it is in fact them making fun of us, okay? do we understand?

hiding baby max is a fridge made me so angry I blacked out. do not remind me of "kid in a fridge" ever again.

Anyway Bethesda finds it so difficult to keep the BOS consistent to the point that they are all so different from each other with little to no explanation as to why they've changed so much. In fact it feels like to me that at some point between fallout 3 and fallout 4 Bethesda has totally mixed up the BOS and the Enclave, since now the BOS hate ghouls for no reason and want to colonise the wasteland. This is just that again. Once more, no design doc behaviour.

Quotes from the BOS i think suck ass

"Duty of the Brotherhood of Steel is to secure the wasteland"

"Flesh is weak by steel endures"

"Violence is a tool we use it to bring order to the wasteland"

When Max is getting interrogated for being a suspect for cutting Daine with razors, mentions "send me to Eden or wherever" and it confused me so much. The only Eden I knew about was John Henry Eden from Fallout 3. Turns out I think what they're trying to reference is New Eden a BOS base from. Fallout Brotherhood of Steel 2?? of all fucking things?? really strange I can't imagine what else he could possibly be referencing though. This is literally just thrown in for the loreheads and I hate it.

Anyway after being a suspect for cutting Daine with razors and also failing his classes Max gets a promotion! this is not explained. They also brand him which people a lot smarter than me have discussed at length about why branding a black guy on screen in your fallout show is a bad idea. Read it here.

I don't really understand why the BOS all do shit in latin now, I know some of them had latin names in fo1 but IIRC Frank Horrigan of the Enclave was the only person in the og games who spoke latin. it feels like Bethesda wanting to capture the interest of people who liked the Legion. maybe that's a reach but given how much right wing propaganda is in the coming episodes I wouldn't put it past them.

Cooper again

I am not calling this idiot The Ghoul that's fucking dumb. what like he's the only one? ever? dumb. whats up with him being buried huh? did Todd not want to tell Nolan that ghouls arent actually zombies and arent actually undead? that just wanted him to jump out a coffin because oooh spooky zombie. honestly just kill me.

My notes: "Don't tell me the ghoul is in that grave I can't take it"

this guy gets dug up once a year and gets pieces of him cut off and put back?? why? for what purpose? how is he down there without eating or drinking? is it a kid in a fridge moment where ghouls don't need to eat or drink, well he drinks a whole lot of water in episode 3 so that's afucking lie. get real. the glowing IV? what is that??

the yodelling is really gonna piss me off, isn't it.

Not him ending the episode on the same quote he said to his daughter. whatever.

Rating: 3/10

[sometipsygnostalgic]

Steam Awards silliness

So apparently the "Steam Awards", which is a thing you may have seen and been very confused about, were a bit of a mess.

Steam basically wanted a to make their own Game Awards which were a voting-directly democratic process.

Naturally people took advantage of this to DUNK on their most hated game developers, rather than throwing a bone to games they actually like.

So, what happened was:

Red Dead Redemption 2 was ironically voted "Best Long-term Support From A Developer" because of how salty the community is about the game NOT recieving any long-term support.

Starfield was ironically voted for "Most Innovative Gameplay". Actual Starfield fans ALSO voted for Starfield in this and all other categories. And Bethesda happily accepted the award despite it being, yknow, a prank.

Hogwarts Legacy was voted "Best on Deck", despite being almost unplayable on deck. After some investigation I have learnt this is because Hogwarts Legacy fans mass-voted their game in every single category, regardless of its efficacy, because they think it is "overhated because of woke gay culture". Steamdeck happened to be the only one not to have had a mass vote for a different game. After those encounters, I am now adding Hogwarts Legacy onto my very small list of "things I will avoid associating with you over if you are into".

People are not sure if The Last Of Us Part 1 really does have "best soundtrack" or if everyone voted for it ironically. I'd say if it was Last of Us Part 2, it'd be ironic, but honestly it's gotta be Naughty Dog fans.

Valve had to act like every one of these was a serious nomination when writing up the reasons for them winning. They couldn't just say "Red Dead Redemption 2 support SUCKS SO MUCH that players voted for it ironically". They had to say "Despite the game being out for years the devs are still supporting their baby". Which is hilarious.

I found an article by Otaku that does a good job of summing it up:

Things get even weirder when you look at the Steam Awards’ selection of finalists in each category. EA Sports FC 24, a soccer game currently sitting at “Mixed” review status, was in the running for Game of the Year and Best Game You Suck At. A sports game is certainly an odd pick for a year otherwise jam-packed with mega releases. And though Baldur’s Gate 3 took home Outstanding Story Rich Game, it was competing with a game called Love Is All Around? Never heard of it? Don’t worry. We didn’t either, until we looked it up. Love Is All Around is a full-motion-video dating sim game inspired by the devs who “want to date every day but will never step out of the house [into] the real world. Check out the Steam page for the game here. Don’t worry, it’s mostly SFW.

So yeah if you were wondering how Starfield won most innovative game, that's how.

[demodemo909]

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR FALLOUT (TV SHOW)

My takes n prediction for season 2

Moldaver = Greatest step mom of Lucy even for just a brief moment in shady sands

FUCK HANK! I SWEAR I WISH SOMEHOW AT NEW VEGAS GOT HIM TRAPPED AGAIN

Possible that Robert House is alive, despite New Vegas is ruined which is definitely not. Makin the choice of the player at the game has consequences n made one of the endings true. even if Bethesda don't or isn't going to

Either Janey or Barb are gonna be the last ones to get out of Cryopods n Norm just gave em the dead eyes

Lucy sees Cooper as her new dad

Thaddeus redemption!!!! or not

Knight Maximus gets to Vault 33

Betty alrd knows Norman is at 31

Chet searched for Norm even if he's a coward n multi task on Steph n her baby

that axolotl beast gonna be absolutely useful. I JUST KNOW

Another flashback of Cooper w his divorce, spendin time w Janey or meeting another new character

[metalforhands]

"Exile Paladin Danse, Steel Maverick" goes absolutely insane. The use of maverick too... love it! I don't play MTG, but I might just have to buy some of these!

RIGHHHTTT???? RIGHT?!

what a baller title. shout out to mtg for acknowledging danse's arc more than bethesda ever has (which like i get it. spoilers. but it's been nearly a decade now!!) this is literally all i have ever wanted ;_;

steel maverick is making me so emotional. sometimes you just need to stare at the definition of maverick, think of danse, and then feel some feelings.

ooooh yeah. aw yeah that's hitting somewhere deep down. you ever think about how danse made his whole personality the brotherhood since it was the only family he ever knew... but this sense of belonging was at the expense of his own individuality.

and following his exile it is only then that he's dubbed "steel maverick" because he's finally his own person who has the support of his friends and is learning to get a new lease on life with his own opinions and thoughts after having his previous reality utterly shattered and [the sniper positioned outside my house in the event i become unwell about danse again takes his shot and fucki

[morgana-ren]

Alrighty, everyone mute me here cause I'm about to go on a tirade.

Look, I've been playing video games since I was young. Very young. Probably too young, if we're being completely honest. We had an old Nintendo 64 from my step-dad's youth that I used to play religiously. I played my ps2 for hours and hours a day as a way to cope with a.. shall we say unstable household. I had Gameboy Advanced, Gameboy color, all the way up to Nintendo DS to the switch. This is something I've been doing since I was barely old enough to speak. I used to get games at Blockbuster, okay? I played the OG Baldur's Gate and Neverwinter Nights on a clunky old computer. Even when we were flat-busted ass broke with absolutely no money to spare, I would play at friend's houses. I would play old AV consoles on those fat ass TVs. It's my oldest hobby besides reading, is the point here.

My point is I'm old enough to remember when gaming was a niche hobby that you could actually get bullied for. It was back when studios made games mostly out of passion, and not to sell to a broader audience. There wasn't really even such a thing as microtransactions. You bought a full and complete game. Blizzard released good products, actually (unbelievable, I know.) Games knew their audience, and there wasn't necessarily an assload of money in it, so it was mostly made out of love for the games and their community.

Gaming has grown in popularity over the last 10-20 years, and that can be an excellent thing! Really! It can be! But Baldur's Gate 3 winning game of the year brought something to my attention that has been driving me mad for a few days now. It's a concept I've found myself repeating for a long time, but barely just sort of sat down to analyze it:

Not everything is for you.

The last few winners of GOTY have had some... sour people be very upset. Not that this is uncommon, but especially the last few years. People saying Elden Ring is 'too hard,' people saying that Baldur's Gate 3 is nothing but pedantic dice rolls, etc. People who, in general, were very unhappy that these games did not appeal to them in particular, and they were very vocal about how these games should be changed to appeal to them personally.

What I'm saying is that these people, along with most others, were not there during the days of niche gaming, where when you didn't like a game, you didn't necessarily throw a tantrum and stamp your feet and demand that these games aren't good and that they need to change, but rather, you just... didn't play them. They weren't made for you.

We live in an age where absolutely everything is being scraped for every last dollar. Games that used to be made out of passion for their communities are now being made to sell, sell, sell as many copies as physically possible to everyone. If it won't pander to every last person, it's not going to be made. Things are being 'streamlined' to make the games appeal to anyone and everyone who might play them.

'Streamlined' in this case, means 'dumbed down.' As Bethesda famously says, KISS: Keep It Simple Stupid.

Games that used to be a little bit more 'niche' and 'complex' like Morrowind, are now games like Skyrim, that are dumbed down to sell to everyone. They remove a lot of the aspects that made them beloved in the name of 'garnering a new and broader audience.' Older folks, adults, children, everyone. But this attitude of inclusivity isn't as great as it might seem initially. It isn't done out of community. It is done to get absolutely every last person possible to empty their wallet at the altar. To get every last fucking dollar out of everyone.

Games are passionless money pits. They sell you a half-baked, simple product that insults your intelligence. It's impossible to fail quests, because God forbid one person doesn't like that and asks for their money back. They won't touch on complex topics, because they don't want to cause a controversy that might drain their prospective bank account. They can't make things so intricate that God forbid a toddler might not understand them. They are milquettoast, miserable little games that appeal not even to people who enjoy games, but rather, people who don't.

Yes, they are making games to try and get money from people who don't even like them. They can't make anything nuanced or put a learning curve or put any actual work or fun into the game, because people who don't actually like playing games might realize "Hey, actually, I'm not enjoying this at all." and not give anymore money.

I'll get to the point.

Games being disliked by certain people is a good thing. It means those companies were unwavering on their vision and their loyalty to their fans. It means it was a game made from passion, and not just to be marketed and sold to literally every living person. They were made with their communities in mind, and no offense, but if you aren't one of the people that likes the things those communities stand for, maybe you should seek it elsewhere rather than trying to change something someone loves to suit you instead. You are not the demographic here.

You hear people that hate turnbased saying that Baldur's Gate 3 should not have been turnbased. Guess what? That's literally DnD. It's a DnD game. Don't like the lack of day cycles? Again, that's long resting in DnD. Pedantic dice rolls? That's fucking DnD, baby. Maybe you don't like it, but just because the game got popular does not mean it was made for you. Too much gay? Go away. Baldur's Gate was not made to sell copies to everyone. In fact, it was a relatively niche prospect that gained massive popularity near the end because of a scandal. I've been with them since Patch 2 of Early Access, and it very much was a passion project by people who loved DnD and TT games. They did not think it was going to hit this level of popularity, and they stuck to their guns even when it did. I cannot tell you how rare and remarkable that is.

Dark Souls is too hard? Maybe it's not the game for you. If you don't like certain design aspects, that's fine and okay! But Miyazaki and Fromsoft should not be forced to change their vision of their passion project because you personally do not like it. It was around before you, and they have a loyal community that does love the game just how it is. If you want a game with a difficulty slider, maybe you should play a game that has one. I'm sorry if you don't like the fundamentals of the game, but they exist for a reason, the community likes it, and no, it's not just for elitist reasons like I see all too often. You just do not understand because you don't like the game and do not like being told no for once by a company that has integrity.

I'm not trying to insult you. I'm being honest when I say that it's an attitude that is expected in the current climate where everything is changed when people complain the loudest because changing it means more money, and more money is the goal. These people are not your friends. Do not forget that. They are not changing it because they care about you. They are changing it because they think they can con you out of another dime.

People have a masochistic relationship with these companies. They have gotten used to being pandered to. They have gotten used to being sold a shitty game that everyone from their grandmother to their toddler niece and nephew can beat. And no, there's nothing wrong with games for everyone. But it's not because they wanted to make a game for everyone. It was because they wanted everyone's money.

People make hour long youtube videos about how Baldur's Gate would have been better if it was real time, and if it was more like this game and that game (namely games that pander to everyone) and then, in the same week, release a video bewailing that all games are so bad now and they don't understand why. They grasp that greed has a part in it, but they don't understand that they are directly contributing to the problem.

Games are bad because when everything is for everyone, nothing is truly for you. You won't have a chance to be passionate about anything, because on the off chance you find something you love, you will inevitably watch it die the same way that those of us who have been here forever did, because someone outside of the community doesn't like it, so it has to go because Christ forbid they don't sell two more copies.

And no, I am not talking about 'woke' or 'political correctness' so you alt-right weirdos can keep the fuck off of this post. I am talking about things like a lack of quest markers. Complex puzzles that you can fail. Political nuance. Things that take brainpower and are fun but not everyone likes.

Maybe not everything is for you. Maybe a game is allowed to exist even if you don't like it. Maybe communities are allowed to have their thing while you have yours. Maybe you have gotten so used to being pandered and catered to with every game being this blase, half-baked experience that is sorta liked by most, but... beloved by none. It's a forgettable, boring experience that garners no real loyalty, but at most a "Ha, that was alright." And then you put it on the shelf never to touch it again.

It means these companies aren't thinking of money; they are thinking of their communities. They are thinking of their fans and the people who love their games. Every time Miyazaki says 'no' to changing the formula that we love about his games, he is thinking of his loyalty to his community and his passion to the game. When Sven refuses to change aspects of the game to suit people who don't like DnD, he is staying loyal to the DnD community.

More companies should be doing this. Not less.

But consumers need to remember that one little creedo: Not everything is for me.

It can exist and I can exist. I do not have to play it and I do not have to enjoy it. It doesn't mean that it's bad. It means it's not for me. And that's fine.

[elderscrollsconceptart]

Have you thought about showing off concept art from fan projects like Skyblivion/Skywind? Could be neat, and they definitely have a few concept artists. I think they'd be happy to let you show some of it off

Hello and thank you for your question!

Please everyone bear with me on this, as this will be a loooong reply, but I've got a lot to say on this matter and related matters and this ask is an opportune time to write all this 💜

I've given *a lot* of thought about this exact thing over the past few months.

Everytime I go looking on artstation, deviantart, etc. for TES artists I come across a lot of art from these and other TES community projects. The people working on these are super talented and alot of them are (IMO) on par with the in-house artists and creatives at Bethesda.

My main drive when creating this blog was to bring attention to the often ignored and overlooked artists behind TES. For years it frustrated me how comparatively little we know about the ins and out of TES games and art development. Everywhere you look online in TES and fantasy forums you see mods, fan art, fan projects etc, all worked on by brilliant and talented artists and creatives.

What is often missing however is the work and creative perspective of the official artists of TES. Take here on Tumblr for example. Follow the right tags or blogs and you'll see nothing but wonderful TES fan art from thousands of artists or fantastic mods and community passion projects.

But you know what you almost never see? Actual TES art posted by TES artists themselves, or at least their art posted by fans with the artist name attached for credit. Occasionally now and again a blog will post official TES art with proper artist credit, but there seems to never have been a blog or sub-community on here exclusively dedicated to just posting official TES art. There should be and elevating the artists of TES with proper credit is something I think we all know should be done. This blog belongs to the community and I try my best to fill this gap as I know for a fact others here feel the same as I do.

There's so much fan art online (which is a good thing!!!) but not nearly enough official TES art posted with artist credit. Thats what this blog is for.

I fear people here and elsewhere are so used to seeing fan art and trying to elevate fan artists, that when they come across this blog they will still just assume its posting fan art because thats virtually all they see on a day to day basis. This has happened numerous times. I will post a piece with full artist credit listed and someone will reblog:

"Wow! This is amazing!" #TES #Fanart

When that happens my heart aches.

It genuinely makes me feel like I'm failing my responsibility to ensure that it is clear that all art posted here is official TES art. All art seen here should be understood as the work of industry professionals working for Bethesda/Zeninax themselves.

It is really really important to stress that I *do not* personally perceive industry produced TES art as naturally superior to fan art.

Art is subjective, as is the merit of it's quality. What I'm trying to stress is that this blog is just trying to bring attention to the oft ignored or unknown artists who make TES. Fan art and projects should be praised and elevated, but I feel this blog is not the space to do so.

Almost daily I see TES fan art on here, Reddit, Twitter, etc. which gets thousands of likes.

Conversely I come across a TES artists on Artstation or elsewhere who will get literally less than a few hundred *views* let alone likes or shares.

That breaks my heart. Everyone's art should be fully appreciated, official art or otherwise. I can't imagine how it must feel to work your way up to becoming an official artist on a beloved series like TES only to have your work stolen or virtually ignored. Your work may be seen but no one will know your name or that *you* made it.

I cannot speak for them, but I'd imagine it is beyond frustrating for TES artists to see their portfolios going ignored or reshared without credit.

I really feel there *should* be a blog that shares TES fan projects art and concept art with full artist credit. That 100% should be a thing and I highly highly encourage someone in the community to make such a blog. Perhaps one day I may even make a side blog like that if I can find the time.

I hope this didn't come across as too long winded of a reply, but hopefully it clarifies the intentions and purpose of this blog for anyone who may not have know. I hope All artists who create art get the respect and exposure they deserve for their hard work and skill. This blog is my best attempt at helping official TES artists get at least a bit more credit and appreciation from the community.

Thank you all, and I apologize for not doing a more thorough job clarifying all art on this blog is official TES art by Bethesda/Zenimax artists.

Love you all 💜

[azurdlywisterious]

How would the atompunk trio react if the protags of their games were switched around. Like idk, put Chell in Rapture and the Courier(however you designed them) in Aperture and Jack in the New Vegas Strip. You can decide how the protags are swapped around though

oh ho ho you have no idea how long ive been planning the larger universe this au in my head is set in. so let's tune into the madness together, shall we?

(circutboard divider made by @violetbudd )

Mr. House meets Jack

Mr. House was not expecting a jumpy, uncoordinated young adult to stumble his way into the Lucky 38, but Victor has nothing but good things to say about the kid so he can't be bad. Jack follows order well, which is both a blessing and a curse Mr. House finds out, so he works out a way to get Victor to keep reminding Jack of what he needs to do and it's smooth sailing from there. Would consider working out a deal with the Followers of the Apocalypse to see what is up with Jack after the Hoover Dam battle.

Mr. House meets Chell

Mr. House gets along with Chell quite well. Chell is efficient and creative with completing missions. And she's willing to be paid in only information which cuts down on costs by a lot. He does find that gun of hers rather intriguing, which would turn into a whole cat and mouse of him trying to get the portal gun from her to examine and her not giving him the gun. Chaos ensues.

Cave Johnson meets the Courier

Cave Johnson wouldn't realize that the various people he keeps testing are all the same Courier. But hey, when you're dealing with an anomaly that keeps reincarnating lets you vivisect them, you tend not to ask too many questions (except for why do you keep coming back after you fall into the corrosive water). Certainly keeps the Courier around later on, hoping to figure what keeps them regenerating their body while keeping their memories intact (in his quest to live forever). Sadly, he doesn't figure it out in time. The Courier would then explore the Aperture labs until who knows when. Although thanks to the fact that they can sorta never die (sure their body dies but their memories dont think kinda like a timelord) then they would remember exactly who Caroline was when interacting with GLaDOS. Oh and the angst of finding all the old lab stuff and Cave Johnson's voice logs again at the Portal 2 timeline point of the game that would actually be heartbreaking.

Cave Johnson meets Jack

Cave Johnson loves Jack. Everyone loves Jack! Who wouldn't love Jack? Cave Johnson would be sure to let everyone know that no one gives Jack orders except for him and Caroline. Would treat Jack like the son he never had and also give him cocaine for his anxiety (for science). Would also want to vivisect Jack to figure out how he keeps lighting things like the mantis men on fire. Wasn't seriously considering making combustible lemons until he saw Jack could light things on fire and decided that the same principles could be applied to lemons too.

Andrew Ryan meets the Courier

Andrew Ryan actually gets to interact with only one Courier thanks to the Vita-Chambers. And as luck would have it, he gets to interact with Suzie Fromme (my favorite courier and the one I always think of when I think of couriers). And he would think Suzie is weird and unhinged and way too powerful but not in a cool way but in a way that scares him (you modded a Bethesda protag of course she breaks reality). But since she's an agent of chaos that only wants to help people he would strike a tentative deal with her to take Atlas down. She would agree for the low price of "a room in the prettiest building in Rapture" which according to her is in Fort Frolic(?) which with all the delirious denizens dropping like drones means that there probably is an open room. Did I mention Suzie has the Black Widow perk? Upon finding out how she got rid of Atlas, Andrew Ryan decides that she is not to be trifled with at all and can be Sander Cohen's problem until the city collapses.

Andrew Ryan meets Chell

Andrew Ryan would probably love and hate Chell. Love because she dispatches enemies with efficiency and doesn't listen to Atlas but also doesn't listen to him. Eventually determines that she just wants to go to the surface and leave forever and after doing a couple of missions for him, lets her. Doesn't like that she's playing all sides trying to find the fastest way to leave, but she just wants to always come put on top. Which she does. Would weaponize her bond with Tenenbaum in a last ditch attempt to get her to do what he wants.