#Fun Fact but Jojo still doesn't know who his dad is

[fanaskher]

[lurkingshan]

Once again I'm here because I'm angry. There's been a lot of talk about Boston and what Jojo wanted or not to say about sluts and whatever. I, and other people I think, were struggling with the idea that Jojo would actually want that message out. So I went to see some interviews. And got kinda shocked about one thing that he said. (btw this is an actual quote.) He was talking about Boston reasons for his behaviour Jojo: Bad people don't need to have a backstory. They are just born sluts. A bad character doesn't need... (and then the interviewer says - he doesn't need tragedy to be bad) Exactly. And then he gets asked if he thinks Boston needs redemption and he emphatically says NO. And then talking about how much fun is writing the character he says this: Boston is such a fun character to write. yeah unpredictable he's like, he doesn't care. he doesn't have morals so we just like goes with the flow. bad people? no morals? humm... i don't know... So yeah, now I don't really know what to think about it. I was wondering what are your thoughts about this. I'm still gonna watch some more of this, because I'm a masochist that needs all the information, but yeah, I thought I would share. Thanks for the space

Yiiiiiikes. Okay, first let me preface this by saying that whenever I am reading/watching something that was either translated to English or spoken in English by a person with a different first language, I try not to get too hung up on specific word choice. By necessity we tend to go for the simplest possible words to convey meaning in those situations, and thus a lot of nuance gets stripped out.

That said, the sentiment is clear: Jojo saw Boston as a villain character without a moral code that he could deploy to cause chaos wherever he liked in the story. And he is definitely conflating his villainy with sexual promiscuity, which is the worst part of this quote and unfortunately aligns with the way that finale, and ultimately the themes of the show, were written. It definitely makes me side eye Jojo and as I’ve already said, I won’t be so inclined to trust him nearly as much next time.

Only Friends, however, has more than one writer, and I don’t think they all see it this way. If you think Boston is purely an irredeemable slut, you don’t write his breakup and reunion with Nick in the way that this show did. You don’t give depth to his situation with Atom. You don’t show his sincere emotion, his hurt, and his earnest desire to be with Nick while he can. With all the info we have now and in retrospect, it kind of feels like there was a bit of a tug-o-war going on with Boston’s story.

My understanding is that Den Panuwat, one of three writers on the show, is the one who adapted the novel version of the story, and there he changed Boston’s final arc significantly. Rather than Boston fucking Atom, he made his final conflict about his dad’s political career with Boston’s sexuality being used as a weapon against him. He wrote Boston and Nick ending on good terms. And he wrote a final chapter for Boston where he arrives in New York, finds a more accepting society and queer community who accept and understand him, and thrives.

I’m sure there were some non-artistic reasons why we couldn’t get this version of the story in the show (the politics story was likely vetoed for censorship reasons and they probably couldn’t afford to show us Boston in NY, for example), but the fact that Den wrote it signals that his perspective on Boston is not fully aligned with what Jojo said in that quote above. Perhaps we have him to thank for the empathetic portrayal and humanity we did see in Boston despite Jojo’s perspective on him. And Den has another show coming soon, so maybe we’ll see a clearer read of his own perspective on queer sexual politics without the GMMTV restrictions when we watch Playboyy.

[ace-the-fox]

Based on what I see on your blog, i know you have other jojo oc kids besides Haruka and Momo. Is it alright if I know who they all are?

I WAS SO EXCITED THAT I GOT THIS ASK AND THEN I FORGOT ABOUT IT WHOOPS-

I was gonna maybe do quick sketches to go along with this ask, but I don't have the time rn and I drew them for this dumb meme a while ago anyways. I'm just really talking about my main villain kids here, and also a bonus girlie 👀. Also some of these aspects, especially in later parts, are a little underbaked. I haven't really rewatched Jojo in a while (and I also have yet to finish part 6, let alone even sniff at the manga) so if it contradicts with Jojo canon... don't talk to me lmao /lh

So, let's start off with Ciliegia, my DIO kid. She's also Giorno's twin sister. She seems aggressive and a little scary, but she's actually just a lil chihuahua. She can and will hurt you if deserved, but she's also just a lil guy you know? A lil vampire lady who just wants head scratches and cherry lollipops. She goes with Giorno to join the mafia, but it's kinda just because home and school suck and she wants to help keep him safe. She's got a crush on Fugo, which eventually develops into a real relationship later on (when exactly is a difficult question, because I haven't decided wether I want her to get on the boat or not. I have reasons for either side, but this section is long enough as it is...) She's also kind of "One of the Boys" but not in a Pick Me girl way (she and Trish have a very nice friendship :) ). Her stand, Dresden Doll, can essentially disintegrate anything (or anyone...) into an ash like substance, but she doesn't use it after a... pretty traumatic experience of her accidentally activating it.

Izei is my Kars and Esidisi kid, who was in the care of Santana as an infant during the events of Part 2. He, thus, was adopted by Stroheim without literally anyone else's knowledge... oof. Stroheim kept him to have further insight on Pillar Man development, but kinda had a father/son bond but the experimentations and the fact that Izei was cooped up in the facility all day really hindered that. He does end up in the care of Joseph and Suzi Q somehow as a teen though, and becomes besties with a younger Holly. He also joins the Speedwagon Foundation later, around Part 3, specialising in animals. I like to imagine, in this universe, he drops off Iggy to the crusaders. He doesn't get a stand, because he obviously doesn't really need one with his ultimate being ass dad, but he does inherit Esidisi's nifty heat powers (they are mostly used to reheat Joseph's coffee). He's a good, quiet lad, if a little snarky and rebellious at times.

Livia is my Diavolo kid, the product of a one-night stand. Her mother quickly became a drug addict when she was little, to cope with her young and single motherhood and being kicked out by family due to it. She has, therefore, probably had the worst backstory. Taking care of her mother, dealing with the often sleazy and aggressive boyfriends she brought home, living in poverty etc. And then her mother died of an overdose and Livia, not wanting to end up in foster care, ran away and got donuted by Diavolo in the process... but then her stand kicked in. Nine Inch Nails' ability is literal immortality (and also makes wounds heal faster - she can heal a papercut in under five minutes), but she can still feel the pain of everything, she just can't die, so it's not as fun as you might think.

Miel technically doesn't count, as she has no biological or even legal relation to Pucci, but idc lol. She sees him as a father figure anyways, as their dysfunctional family were very attentive in the church he preached at. I'm not sure exactly what role she plays in Part 6, but she is very much aware and on board with his whole plans, as he's one of the two people they trust. The other being a boy named Peter who they have a crush on, and he does reciprocate those feelings but she turns them down. She claims it's because she wants to be a nun and doesn't want to affect that, but it's really because witnessing her parents' terrible relationship really affected her. Their stand, Oh Klahoma, makes them able to disguise themselves in objects like desks and walls while still being able to see and hear.

Jamie is my Funny Valentine kid (even though I despise that man), originally from a separate universe where his wife can have kids and then brought into Part 7 by D4C. He actually really looked up to his dad until he met Lucy Steel shortly after being brought to this universe, which just so happened to be after the... you know. He didn’t look upon him so favourably after that (mmm... yummy rebellion arc). There's also stuff going on before he switched universes, like his dead boyfriend who was also engaged to someone else at the time... yeah. His stand, Achilles, can also see into the future, meaning he can change the future. It's a little tricky, though, as 1) he can't just choose to see the future, they just come as random prophetic visions and 2) he has no idea when these future visions are meant to be, they could be anything from five minutes to five years away.

Kia is my Tooru fankid. Not sure how exactly it happened, but one day a 17 year-old just popped out of the dirt like nothing. They were immediately taken in by a teenage boy who they almost immediately developed a crush on. Unfortunately, he's taken. Fortunately, Kia's stand, "Breaking Glass", allows him to shapeshift. So, he pretends to be the guy's girlfriend. If you feel bad for their crush, I would also like to say that he had a feeling it was Kia the whole time BTW and let them do it anyways... *sigh* men.

And lastly, as a bonus, Concetta! My Cioccolata/Secco kiddo. They should probably not be allowed anywhere near children, but their aesthetic and relationship is fun and I just had to. Concetta was raised by her dads up until the colleseum fight, which she was present for, and the police found her as a newly made orphan at ten years old. She goes through foster care for a couple of years, and then runs off to get revenge on Giorno. Just teenage girl things, yk? Her stand, Brittle Bones, allows her to take off her own limbs and have them still be fully functional without causing her pain... fun!!

[shoechoe]

Do you have any JJBA ships? And if so, what are they?

yeah, I do actually. I think I listed a couple of them on my "about me" thing but I haven't really talked about them yet, so I will. (I will start with the more popular ones and work my way down.) This turned out to be kind of long so I’ll put it under a cut as well.

 probably the most relevant/popular one that I ship is Bruno with Abbacchio. I don't really have any complex takes on it, but it just makes sense to me. abbacchio is a character that generally has really low self-esteem and doesn't really feel any inherent worth about himself due to trauma-related guilt, and the only way he feels like he has a purpose is when he's following bruno. he was also the very first person that bruno invited to his group, which means they've been together the longest out of anyone else. when I got to the boat scene and abbacchio told bruno "the only time I feel inner calm is when I'm with you," I was like "woah, okay. that's kinda gay."

 when abbacchio is found dead and bruno has to pretend to be calm and collected, but you can clearly see he's holding back a breakdown, it was depressing, man. it's honestly tragic what happened to the two of them in the end (but there does seem to be an implied afterlife in Jojo, so... maybe they're ghost married right now. Who knows?)

 I guess it just seems like a nice ship to me based on how much they rely on and care about each other canonically. I will say that some of the fanon content kind of annoys me (specifically the “Bruno is the mom and Abbacchio is the dad” thing... I don’t understand why people have to project a straight relationship onto a gay one, you know? it reminds me of when people go up to a gay couple and ask “oh, who’s the masculine one and who’s the feminine one?” That’s not how it works, lol.) despite that, though, I still like the ship a whole lot.

-

the next one is Josuke and Okuyasu. I think they’re cute together. what kind of platonic teenage friendship involves taking each other out to a fancy italian restaurant? trick question. the answer is none. i didn’t really initially ship this after watching part four (i’m not really a person who’s super geared towards shipping most of the time considering canonical romance plots tend to bore me more than anything) but i warmed up to it after seeing some of the fanon josuyasu stuff and also thinking in retrospect about their scenes together. i think the pairing works really well.

 i also just really like their dynamic. due to the fact that okuyasu isn’t very smart, he’s not really capable of or confident in knowing what to do on his own, so he often relies on other people to follow and basically help guide him through life. the initial person he did this with was his brother- when he dies, you can tell just how scared and confused he felt. i think that’s the main reason why he befriended and started following josuke so quickly afterwards. i think josuke became that new person for him, if that makes sense? (I should really get around to rewatching part four lol just writing this is making me remember just how good it was.)

-

 i also really like jolyne x hermes. this just seemed like an obvious one from the start when i read part six. i talked a bit about why i like their relationship so much in that one jolyne post already, but that was a while ago. just watch the way they interact with each other- they start off hostile due to their environment, but eventually grow to respect and admire each other and start having fun. it’s really nice. (i also have a lot of problems with how jolyne and anasui’s relationship developed in canon, but that’s not really what matters considering i started thinking they’d make a cute couple since before anasui was introduced.)

i also like this scene especially. you can just tell how much they care about each other- the fact that hermes (who’s been hardened from her time in prison) is comfortable enough around jolyne that she’s willing to cry at her side is just sorta heartbreaking, you know? i guess their relationship just works for me.

-

 the last main one here is avdol and polnareff. i think i’ve expressed my opinion on how Stardust Crusaders is my personal least favorite part, but i did always like avdol and polnareff’s relationship. I have mixed feelings on Avdol because i feel like his character was easily the most underutilized and least developed out of everyone (which was a shame, because in my opinion, there was actually some potential with him based on what we do get to see of him and what we saw with his relationships with some of the other characters like Joseph) but i always thought he was at his best when he relaxed his stoic and reserved attitude and started fucking around with the other characters- which pairs really well with polnareff, who’s a total goof and tends to easily befriend and bring out more personality from the others.

 I especially like their scenes together. That one moment where they decided to mess with their enemy by literally pissing down his breathing hole was such a shitpost-tier scene that I can’t help but like how absurd it was. They have a really nice mix of serious moments showing how they like each other and funny/relaxed moments that makes their relationship feel super nice to watch.

 The only thing that I really dislike is how Avdol’s false death and revival was handled (especially in regards to how everyone just let Polnareff stew in his own guilt and lied to him for weeks until Avdol recovered, and literally no one gave a shit when he clearly felt hurt and betrayed by this to the point where he broke down crying), but... I feel like if I let myself rant about that and Avdol’s “death” here I would be going off-topic lmfao. Even then, it goes to show just how much Polnareff cared about him, to the point where he was willing to do pretty much anything to bring Avdol back.

-

another one I think about sometimes is Kars x Esidisi. I don’t ship this one too seriously, but it’s funny to me. i mean, they did run away to raise a child together, so... (also the pillar men are pretty much the saving grace of part two to me so i easily think about them the most lol)

as for canon ships, i always liked Jonathan x Erina and Tiziano x Squalo. I don’t have real thoughts except that I think they’re cute. I actually think that Jonathan and Erina’s relationship should’ve been shown a lot more than it was, which is a rare sentiment for me because i usually find main character love interest plots to be boring. It’s also always nice to see an actual gay couple in media in regards to Tiziano and Squalo (even if the canon LGBT+ rep in Jojo admittedly tends to be iffy.)

 don’t judge me for this last one but I also kind of have this crackship with Pucci and Diavolo (I call it pucciboss). it was basically the result of me bashing my two favorite villains together like a godless heathen. i think i’ve mentioned this a couple times before, but not in depth because i was pretty sure no one wanted to hear about it. it started off as just a joke like “ha ha, what if they were in love?” but then i started making headcanons about it and thinking “hmmm... you know this actually sort of makes sense” and it pretty much became a thing in my brain.

the thing with pucci and diavolo is that like... a christian priest and a dude named “Devil” is kind of inherently an interesting setup for a ship in my opinion tbh. (Especially considering the fact that diavolo had a christian upbringing just like pucci.) not to mention since Made in Heaven has the ability to alter fate and reset the universe to shape it to the user’s liking, would pucci theoretically then be able to stop the death loop?? (I actually have one joke concept where resetting the universe caused some unintended consequences to the world and freeing Diavolo happened to be one of them, meaning pucci and diavolo met that way.) i also feel like considering just how much jojo villain content there is, there is extremely little content of pucci and diavolo interacting which was always sort of disappointing to me.

i would continue to ramble about this but i feel too embarrassed at this point, soo.... become a pucciboss stan now everyone (/j)

[aquilacalvitium]

Sonic Wachowski Headcanons

- Stim toys. He has them.

The little ball of energy that he is needs to be moving around constantly but he's not always in a situation where he's allowed to or even has enough room to roll around at the speed of sound. SO, he gets stim toys! Fidget spinners, fidget cubes, a weighted ball on a string to spin around, anything he can fiddle with!

- He stims

Okay I may be projecting a little but come on, you have to admit the idea of him stimming is adorable. Can't run around? Fidget toys not providing enough stimulation? Hand flaps, baby! Head shaking, bouncing legs, tapping feet, anything to keep himself moving!

- He spent the first few months of his life with the Wachowskis struggling

He's spent his entire life running and has rarely stayed in the same place for long. Even when he has, he always had to be thinking of escape routes or what to do once he was found out. So living in a house with a family and never having to worry about moving on any time soon is completely new to him. Maybe he spends the first few weeks looking for hiding spots around the house. Maybe he explores the garden for escape routes. He knows he doesn't need them anymore, but they make him feel safe to know where they are. And if he's ever upset, he finds one of these spots and hides there until he feels better.

- He reflexively hides from everyone

Being used to hiding all the time, it takes him a while to realise that he's welcome in the community now and nobody minds. If he's out with Maddie or Tom, he automatically finds himself standing behind them where he's less likely to be seen.

- He sits on the back of the sofa on movie nights

Since he always joined in with movie nights through the window, he felt much more comfortable to be hanging off the back of the sofa instead of sitting beside Tom and Maddie. As time goes on, he finds himself sitting with them more, but usually prefers the back.

- He finds it odd to be interacting with people on a daily basis

He always used to watch people from a distance but never actually interact with them. It takes him a while to get used to the fact that he can now walk downstairs in the mornings and find Tom and Maddie welcoming him with a big plate of pancakes for breakfast (all the syrup). He ends up having to retreat to his room a few times to readjust himself. He's very much an extrovert, but being unused to interaction made the shift from being invisible to being part of a family rather jarring.

- He takes full interest in anything Tom and Maddie do

He joins Tom on patrols around town for the fun of it and even tries to help out sometimes (although this has more than once lead to a rather big mess) and joins Maddie in her yoga exercises. He still doesn't know how she can do some of the stretches she does, but he's determined to be as good as her one day.

- He still occasionally feels homesick

At first, he wasn't sure why the warm, happy feeling of being in a family made him feel so sad until he remembered Longclaw. He's felt homesick in the past but he's feeling it even more now that he's reminded of how safe and happy he felt with her. He may have broken down crying a few times (what? No he didn't!) but thankfully Doughnut Dad and Pretzel Mum were there to provide hugs.

- He becomes really good friends with Jojo

The two of them hang out as often as possible. It's not easy with the distance between them and Maddie's Sister hating Tom so much - safe to say she's not too happy about the influence an alien who looks up to Tom will have on her daughter - but she lets them play anyway because she knows how happy it makes Jojo. The two of them have definitely made up their own secret handshake, and Sonic promises not to run too fast when they play tag.

- He has nightmares

He may have perhaps possibly only slightly in the realm of maybe had a couple of teensy weensy little tiny nightmares bad dreams about being chased out of the Wachowski house by Robotnik who somehow escaped the mushroom planet. He maybe perhaps possibly woke up in a panic attack and had to sit with Tom and Maddie for half an hour to calm down. And you'll never be able to prove that this happened in the middle of the night and he woke Tom and Maddie with a scream of terror. What? I'm not saying it happened. Shut up.

[whole-lotta-hoes]

Whole Lotta Hoes| Crack Fanfic Mini Series

Episode One: Zeppelin Is No More

Episode Two: Looking For A Job

Episode Three:

Episode Four:

Episode Five:

Warning:

This will cause you to lose a couple of brain cells and question your sanity. It will include a shit ton of weird shit and things that don't make sense at all. Do not read if you are not ready for any of this, read at your own risk.

Cast:

John Paul Jones (Main character)

Robert Plant

Jimmy Page

John Bonham

-------------------

Led Zeppelin is a band apparently. It's just a bunch of horny mother fuckers put together to make songs about sex. John Paul Jones was laying in bed with Robert Plant which he has no idea how that happened. He hoped nothing weird went down between them cause Jimmy Page would be so mad. oh jesus oh god you do not want to make that mother fucker mad. He'll literally turn you into a cheeseball and eat you. John got out of bed only to see that John Bonham was standing in the corner eating swedish fish gummies. He was not going to question it.

"Want some?" Bonzo asked him and he held one in his hand.

"I don't know you what the fuck!?" Jonesy yelled. He went to the baffroom and spotted jimmy trying to swim inside of the toilet. He believed he could do it if he tried hard enough.

"the oil supply demand is sky rocketing these days!" jimmy yelled as he got out of the toilet.

"Bitch do not touch me with your boo boo water," He warned him as he grabbed a toothbrush to use as a weapon. He learned how to make a knife with it in jail.

"Penis guitar playing is totes fun jonesy, you should try it," jimmie added. Oh mother fucker he is a heterosexual lad. Or that is what he said the other day when he ate some of robert's caramel popcorn. man he wondered how he even ended up in that stupid band. who's led and why does he have a zeppelin? you know some guy named their kid zeppelin but he claims that he didn't name him after the band. wait what were we talking about?

The band all decided to head to mcdonalds to eat happy meals. jimmy tickles.

"Guys! oh my god you will not believe it but britney is such a slut! ugh! can't believe she left me for a fish lookin' mother fucker-"

"No one gives a rats ass about your weird horny ass!" jimmy cut him off by yelling at robert. God damn that shithead has a huge ego but a small dick. Jonesy never understood why people liked him so much. He once stole his favorite pair of jojo siwa socks and claimed he never knew he owned any.

"You motherfuckers we're supposed to be going on tour!" Bonzo yelled as he swooped the food off the table.

"suck my asshole bonzo!" jim yelled.

"calm down pagey, he's just a meanie," robert added as he patted his head.

"y'all need to start realizing that no one likes you both!" jonesy snapped.

"shut up you're literally ugly and small and the bassist of led zeppelin and you look like heman with that stupid haircut of yours" Bonzo said as he ate jonesys burgers. damn that hurt.

"You know," jonesy began, "i don't need this job"

"what job?" robeet askes.

"shhhhh let the weirdo speak," jimmy said as he stuck his finger into his mouth.

"without me you will all suck asshole and no one will actually like led zeppelin," he explained.

the three slowly looked at each other and began to laugh their asses off at him.

"You act like you matter so much," robert added.

"shut up cheese cream! you're literally big and ugly and you look like you are 50 years old!" bonzo said as he drank his milk. that was funny. Jonesy felt his blood boil and grabbed his happy meal and stormed out.

-

It was the day of their shit concert. led zeppelin were backstage preparing to cause a dismother and set things on fire. preferably roberts underwear that pretty much doesn't exist in this case. the band stepped on stage and the crowd went wild.

"hello bananas-" That motherfucker fell forward into the drum set. oopsies. jimmy ran to him to make sure his hoe isn't dead or alive. fucking bon jovi.

"oh shit! robert plant is down!" he yelled. jonesy was absolutely done with them. they are nothing but a bunch of dumb fucks who ruin everything. He took out his laser penis and shot jimmy and robert to death.

"oh Motherfucker has a fucking laser pp! hija de su pinche madre!" jimmy yelled as he split in half. robert died again. bonzo just sat there blown away by the fact that that john paul jones just killed the front man and the guitarist of Led Zeppelin in front of millions of people. he was impressed.

"holy shit man you really-"

nope sorry but jonesy shot him too so he died. damn he could've let him live. meanie. oh wait im writing this so i could've.... ah man im too lazy to go back and fix it. too bad we're going with this plot now. Jonesy stepped off the stage and headed to the back.

"god dammit i hate everyone in this bloody world," he said to himself. he decided to hit the pub that was nearby to enjoy himself.

As he was sitting at the counter drinking something that is an alcoholic beverage. he began to spark ideas of what he could possibly do since led zeppelin died. He thought about starting a whole new band but he remembered that what caused him to kill led zeppelin. that was out of the shopping list for walmart. next was to steal money from the bank so he remains rich but he then realized that he is a famous musician and will get recognized quickly. fuck. he then thought of changing his hair to look less like heman cause that insult hurt.

"aha!" he shouted. He finally thought of something that could get him a shit ton of money. He drank the remaining drink from his cup and ran out of the pub.

-

he put on a thicc line of eyeliner, red lipstick, a black wig, fish nets leggings, high heeled boots, and earrings. oh man this is going to be hella great. His wife walked in to see what the fuck this small ass mothertrucker was up to this time. oh man i shat my pants.

"sweetie what the fuck are you doing!?" she yelled. Jonesy turned to look at her.

"led zeppelin is no more," he responded. She was so confused and wondered how the fuck she even ended up marrying heman. she had no idea what led zeppelin is no more meant and was hella concerned for his health.

"be back in a few days," he added as he broke his ankle trying to exit the house and rolled down the hill. oops it's not up the hill anymore. guess you could really say he went down hill. i hate myself so much. he walked down the sidewalk and ended up in someone's house. Motherfucker it's jimmy page's house. he stole his nice trousers or whatever those were. my teacher walked by as i wrote that btw. turns out they don't fit him cause jimmy is also a big hoe and jonesy isn't. shit. jimmy is embarrassing asf. that was pointless of him stealing so he stole his underwear. wait he wears those? imma look it up hold on. i didn't find anything about that so im just going to assume that he doesnt.

there was a picture of jimmy when he was with the yardbirbs and golly that is one ugly Motherfucker! he stole and stuffed it into his underwear. he got out of the house full of useless shit that he did not need at all. Then he forgot what he was doing. Jonesy continued walking down the street only to break his other ankle and rolled down the steep pathway. damn he's one dumb hoe bitch.

-

His laser penis was out of control. he just wanted to have a little me time but instead shot a whole through the wall of the motel be was staying in. god dammit. he removed his pp and switched it out with a normal pp. that's odd. his plan of overthrowing led zeppelin stressed him out. what else do you do when you're stressed? well can't say cause i ain't gotta peener. he got so bored. his days of not being in led zeppelin have been lame and was the worst idea he could even come up with. he didn't know what to do know. he can't just eat your grandma over and over again. he looked at himself through the mirror and oh my god I'm a sexy Motherfucker oh yeah bitch im THE BITCH. he needed to find something that'll keep him entertained for while.

babysitting was a bad idea. he got bitten by a bunch of goblins and gave him rabies. god i hate kids.

"hello motherfucker," jimmy said.

"OH SWEET MOTHER OF GOD DAD SHOES PENIS PLANT! I THOUGHT I KILLED YOU THE OTHER DAY!" Jonesy yelled as he jumped over the couch.

"Nah bitch that was just my twin brother Jamie Patricia Page," He added. "Bitch why are you dressed like a stripper?"

Oh yeah he forgot that was what he was going to do once he killed led zeppelin. he still can but now there's a little bitch with him named james patrick page.

"we should kill robert plant," jimny suggested.

"Bitch i already killed him, you're a little too late you duck whore," he responded.

turns out he didn't actually kill led zeppelin but instead killed their twin brothers.

"You want to overthrow led zeppelin into the trashcan?" Jonesy asked. "Thought that's what you and bert wanted to do...."

"Nah man.... percy is a very stupid penguin and is meanie.... he stole my jojo siwa socks," jimmy explained.

ah damn turns out robert plant is the villain of the story and should be died. he is too powerful. his hair will slice the fuck out of anyone.

"You got a plan?" Jonesy asked.

"i say we steal his pants and burn them and use them as an alternative to oil," he explained. damn science class. then this guy named bonzo showed up and began to beat them with his drum sticks.

"BONZO CALM THE FUCK DOWN! AHHHHHHHHH!!!" james yelled.

"sorry but robert said to beat you both with them!" bonzo yelled back.

jonesy dug through his pants and took out a bunch of swedish fish gummies.

"hey look! fish gummies! come and get it boy!"

"bitch what the fuck I am not some stupid dog for you to be doing that time of shit you small Motherfucker heman lookin hoe short shit," bonzo said.

"GIMME GIMME OH SHIT!" he attacked Jonesy.

jimmy page the god of led zeppelin stood there watching while cheering them on fight fight fight! it got in here so he removed his trousers and threw them at bonzo which ended up knocking him out.

"oh shit! your pants are powerful! we can use it to kill percy!" Jonesy shouted.

"NO! JIMBERT MUST GO CANON!" Jimmy yelled and jumped out the window. all you heard was splash. that motherfucker jumped into the pool and is now wet. that's a disturbing image. Jonesy rolled his eyes and went back to doing whatever the fuck he was doing. it all of a sudden got really bright outside. oh the sun came out cause it was cloudy. but wait! Jonesy looked out the window and spotted robert plant heading towards him.

"IM THE GOLDEN GOD-" that motherfucker fell inside of the pool and sizzled. cual pinche golden god ese no mas anda haciendo puros desmadres y estupideces de mario.

that was the end of led zeppelin.