#For who gets the sympathy and excuses for doing wrong and who does not

[spear-carrier-number-three]

the rampant kant hate in this fandom isn't surprising but it is exasperating.

[star-anise]

Ask I got on my sideblog but am answering here:

Hi there! I know you're a therapist and I have a question: I saw some people arguing on Twitter about the impacts of trauma. There was a therapist among them, and they had a masters degree in social work, they post about it often. They say that people who have experienced trauma hurt other people because it benefits them or gives them pleasure, and they are disconnected from empathy and sympathy. That seems wrong, but maybe it's not? That's all, thanks!

Ooof, yeah, that's... complicated. It's technically true, but also frequently used as a lie.

Trigger warning: Child abuse, child grooming, interpersonal violence, trauma (childhood & intergenerational), true crime, totalitarianism

Because basically, that describes MOST humans who decide to hurt other humans on purpose without a strong ulterior motive. That's not a trauma thing, that's a human thing.

I babysit for a family with a 1-year-old and a 3-year-old. When the 1yo does something to upset their older sibling, and that sibling winds up and smacks them, that's the same basic thing. It benefits them (makes 1yo go away), brings them pleasure (having an outlet for their anger is very satisfying), and they're disconnected from empathy (they're often surprised and confused when the 1yo is crying, because they're 3 and THEY feel fine and they don't really understand yet that other people's feelings really exist) or even sympathy (understanding that if you hit someone, they will probably be upset). That's something we adults have to watch out for and intervene in, because empathy and impulse control take time to learn.

But as for where trauma figures into this... how to explain.

There's this old logical puzzle about categories, where you say things like:

All dogs have four legs*

A dog is an animal

And then the catch is that you can't extend that to say

All animals have four legs

*RIP to all the tripods and legless animals that apparently aren't dogs anymore for the purposes of this logic exercise

Animals obviously include fish and millipedes and whales and snakes and jellyfish. The number of legs an animal can have is HIGHLY diverse, and will eventually lead to a debate on what the definition of "leg" is.

So there is this common thing we see:

Some people are much more violent and aggressive than other people

These violent and aggressive people have almost always experienced some form of trauma/abuse/neglect

And the link people are really prone to thinking is:

People who have experienced trauma/abuse/neglect will go on to being violent and aggressive with other people.

This is incorrect. To some degree, I can see why it's widely believed - after all, way more people tune in to learn about a serial killer's abusive childhood than for the more common story, which is survivors of trauma slowly going about their lives in ordinary undramatic ways.

Because the thing is, trauma is REALLY diverse. Humans are inherently varied and a bit chaotic, since we can choose very different ways to live and operate, and trauma splits that variability like a prism turning light into a rainbow. Only about 30% of abused children grow up to be abusive themselves. The other 70% choose very different lives.

And yet. My eternal question is: WHY is this such a meme? Why do so many people with a shitty childhood flinch at the 30% statistic and think, "Is that me? Am I destined to be a monster?" Why does this story have legs, when so many other facts about trauma have way more empirical backing and usefulness and get very little attention?

I submit that there is one group that fucking LOVES the idea that traumatized person equals abuser. One group that pushes it into the discourse, in international media or around the family kitchen table, with great ingenuity and gusto.

Abusers.

They love it for two reasons. The most obvious reason is: It absolves them of their actions. "It wasn't ME who hit you, it was my childhood trauma!" A veritable classic excuse that takes their agency out of the equation. And it really can be hard to tell when it's a good excuse and when it isn't!

Reason two is the more insidious one: It cuts their victim's sense of goodness, worthiness, and moral certainty out from under them.

It's as simple as saying, "Look at how you pushed back at me (when I was abusing you)! You're the REAL abuser here!" It's the heart of what domestic abuse researchers call DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender). It can be that simple, or it can be so complicated and byzantine it makes your head hurt.

I only really got a handle on understanding this thanks to a friend, who said she was okay with me sharing this story if I didn't identify her. I won't go into any unrelated details of her abuse, but for the record, hers is probably the most extreme case of anyone I've personally interacted with, and I used to work as a therapist and in domestic violence shelters. Her dad heinously abused her as a child. He'd also studied psychology in university. I have been trying to fathom how the fuck anyone could do what he did to her for YEARS, and I think I've got a few viabletheories.

So. She was an ordinary child, bright, warmhearted, well-behaved, and a bit autistic. A bit more naive and trusting than your average preschooler. I imagine that from his perspective, there was the convenient benefit that he often had unrestricted access to her, and he could relatively easily overpower and manipulate her.

But she had one serious downside: If anyone ever found out what he was doing to her, they would go fucking apeshit. She wasn't really prone to lying or acting out, so people would treat her as a fairly credible reporter; several other adults found her she was lovable, innocent, and endearing; and what he wanted to do to her was, I repeat, heinous.

So while he abused her, one of the things he said was: "I'm doing this because I was abused as a child. That's how it works. All abusers come from abuse. There are statistics proving it. This means you're an abuser too. See what society thinks about child abusers? That's what people will think about you, if they know that you've been abused."

And she was, you know, a child, not someone who studied psych research. He was her dad. So she believed him.

She thought that he was using his adult brain to correctly assess the truth about her as a person, for purely objective reasons. The way you'd try to teach a kid who talks with their mouth full about table manners. It's been a couple decades now, but she is still very slowly chipping away at her core belief that she is inherently awful and only her father recognized the truth about her.

Sometimes when we talk about it I have to bite my tongue because I'm sitting here trying to figure out what the fuck was going on with him, an adult man who wanted to abuse her because he'd really enjoy it. I think about him trying to figure out how to manipulate an innocent child into accepting being abused, and minimize the risk that he'd go to jail for it. And although I hate his everloving guts, I'm almost a bit impressed at his level of machiavellian audacity, to come up with a line that was SUCH hot bullshit that people have devoted their entire careers into proving it false, and yet, because it hit exactly the right psychological issue at exactly the right psychological stage and his intended victim was so trusting, he could get her to believe him enough to turn that lie into her core identity.

Praise be to G-d and Criminal Minds, he did not, in the end, get away with it. She got enough courage to tell people, and get free of him. And she is not, in fact, a horrible abusive person.

But I think what he did so very brazenly is what a lot of abusers do, in more disguised and indirect ways. Probably partly because it really helps, when abusing people, not to treat them like human beings with their own thoughts and feelings, but if one must posit that they have something going on between their ears, it's easiest to assume that everyone else responds to trauma with aggression and abuse. After all, considering the possibility that someone like them could choose not to be abusive takes all the fun and plausible deniability out of the whole affair.

But now I see echoes of that "my victims are just as bad as I am" tactic all over the place. I honestly think it's a very similar mechanism that Hannah Arendt pointed out in The Origins of Totalitarianism. She observes that violent totalitarian regimes routinely accuse their intended victims of the very act they intend to commit themselves, to justify a "retaliation" that's actually just aggression. Think claiming "Our opponents are rigging this election" as an excuse to rig an election in the opposite direction.)

To sum up: You're human. Humans can do good and bad things. It's not necessarily good to completely forswear anything violent or angry in you, but to come up with a framework of how to be assertive and get your needs met in an ethical fashion. There are times it is appropriate and even necessary to escape or fight against somebody else's will.

On the other hand, If find yourself inflicting pain on other people on a regular basis, get some support and take a good hard look at your life choices. Sometimes it's hard to figure out how to solve problems in your life without violence or aggression, and you might need some help with that. Maybe talk to a counsellor or learn anger management skills.

But in no way is it predestined, inherent, implicit, or doomed, that your experiences and brain wiring make you violent or evil. You always have the choice to define yourself beyond what was done to you.

[withthewindinherfootsteps]

I sometimes see the opinion that MXTX took the clichéd tropes she'd critiqued in Scum Villain, and played them straight in MDZS. But though a lot of them appear in MDZS, I'd argue that none are actually played straight at all!

The main point of MDZS's tropes is subversion. Yes, WWX has a 'tragic backstory', even an arguably overused one (orphaned by his parents at a young age, forced to live on the streets with nobody to rely on, etc) – but how things differ in how it's used. Tragic backstories are normally used to build sympathy for a character, to make us care and get invested in them. But... we're never actually shown any of those street days, we're never shown and never dwell upon how much he suffered during them. They're only really mentioned in passing and whenever dogs come up! If the goal was to make us feel bad for WWX, this would be very ineffective writing. But what's actually important here isn't that WWX went through tragedies – it's how he doesn't let the tragedies he went through define him. He doesn't dwell on them, the narrative doesn't dwell on them, it's never used to earn sympathy points... because what defines WWX is his choices and how he chooses to act, not a backstory completely out of his control. What gets us invested in him is his personality and the character writing of MXTX, not tragic events used as a substitute for identity.

And this trope treatment fits extremely well with WWX's personality itself – he's someone who 'forgets the pain as soon as the wound has healed'*, but also who actively chooses to focus on the present because you can't change the past; someone who holds the belief that 'gains and losses [should] remain uncommented on' when choosing what to do.

The use of the tragic backstory isn't the only thing that's subverted, either – the other main thing is the 'blackening' of the protagonist, and its impact on the protagonist's fall. After being thrown into the Burial Mounds, on a surface level it does seem like this blackening has occurred: the first thing we see when he returns is his gruesome torture of the Wen cultivators; he's 'forsaken' traditional cultivation in favour of an 'evil but more powerful' path; and frankly, Sunshot-era WWX is terrifying. But MDZS is not a blackening story, and so the events of the Burial Mounds aren't used as a catalyst for that purpose. Though it's true that WWX's not entirely the same person he was before (because how could be be?), underneath it all, his morals, worldview and core** stay the same. Though gruesome, his revenge is directed towards the ones who wronged him, not those past that and certainly not the entire world. His experience in the Burial Mounds doesn't lead to him being some evil, blackened overlord... like everyone says he is at the start! That's subverted, because again, WWX's values and choices are more important to the story than genre conventions.

But the most crucial thing? What leads to WWX's downfall isn't any blackening! It isn't any vengeance or morally dubious actions***– he was praised for those things during the Sunshot Campaign! No, what leads to his downfall is something completely unrelated to that, something which would've disappeared had the trope been played straight. It's him doing what's right by defending the Wens, it's him following his moral code when it opposes the world's, it's him standing up to the injustice of others – not others standing up to the injustice of him. That's the subversion here.

(Also, once again, the fall of Lotus Pier, the Burial Mound, etc, aren't used for sympathy points – and if it was relevant, they wouldn't have been used to excuse any actions, either. Using tragic events as an excuse for doing bad things is critiqued many times in MDZS, through characters like Xue Yang and Jin Guangyao. And that's not exactly a trope subversion, but it is a critique of badly handled 'excuses'.)

These are by no means all the tropes MDZS subverts – the nature of guidao vs the usual nature of modao being another very major one – but they're the main ones that feature in Scum Villain.

So, though at first glance MDZS seems to play the tropes MXTX critiqued there straighter, it's not a simple case of using them as cliches, and we see that by how they're used to impact the narrative, and how that differs from what they're traditionally used for. MDZS doesn't fall back into clichés Scum Villain satirised – it's the subversion to Scum Villain's exploration and critique.

--

*Which I know is generally used negatively, to describe someone not learning a lesson from a punishment, but it really describes WWX in general, too. He doesn't dwell on that pain, he does his best to move on from it.

**...heh

***And, because it's often debated – whatever the morality/culpability of Nightless City is doesn't even matter! The events happened at a pledge conference against him that was already taking place. WWX's actions there didn't make people want to kill him because that was explicitly happening beforehand.

[mixtape-timeout]

This is the last post I will be making on this topic. Since gimmeurtmi is back and posting again, here is yet another reminder for you that she is a Zionist. She is trying to spin the story and claim that people are witch-hunting her for being Israeli, which is just another excuse to deflect from her disgraceful behavior. Since she wants to say that we are spreading misinformation, please look at the screenshots in the link. These are screenshots of posts SHE made herself. Not my words, just hers. Read her posts without any of my commentary, and come to your own conclusions about her beliefs. Her posts speak for themselves.

((More below))

She can say she's Pro-Palestine all she wants, but her actions do not reflect that. I can't prove if she is attending peace rallies like she says she is, but what we do know is that the things she says and does are in direct contradiction of this. Please look at the tags of the original callout post and see the sheer number of bloggers (including other authors) she had blocked for being Pro-Palestine. She claims she blocked people for being Anti-Semitic, but what she perceives as "Anti-Semitic" is anything Anti-Zionist. The testimonies from people who used to follow her and used to be very close friends with her all say she is a very manipulative person who always makes herself the victim. She has repeatedly made Zionist posts, deleted them, pretended to change her views, post "Pro-Palestine" things, then go back and show her true colors once the accusations blow over. She had reblogged fundraisers for Rafah weeks ago on her blog @stuckonspidey after being called out that are now nowhere to be found. She is a liar and a manipulator who has repeatedly said things that contradict her actions just to save face.

If she's Pro-Palestine, why does she make posts sympathizing with the IDF? Why does she support the occupational force that kills Palestinians for fun, undresses hostages to humiliate them (including CHILDREN), beats hostages to death with hammers in their captivity, disguises themselves as HUMANITARIAN AID to kill hundreds of refugees, takes pictures with hostages/dead bodies and posts them on social media, steals Palestinian women's underwear and takes pictures with it after killing them/ransacking their houses, targets journalists and humanitarian aid workers, straps injured Palestinians to their trucks and uses them as human shields? This is the army that fired 355 bullets at the car that 6 year old Hind Raghab was in while she was surrounded by her dead family members, KNOWING she was in there. They are a depraved, violent occupational force that kills and tortures civilians, and one of the most basic pillars of being Pro-Palestine is opposing the IDF. You cannot be Pro-Palestine and have sympathy for the army that is killing and oppressing them. You cannot say you stand for Palestinian liberation and peace, yet mourn for their oppressors when the resistance fights back. There is proof all over the internet of the IDF's war crimes because they post it themselves. Here are a few links if you don't believe me. LINK LINK LINK LINK. Please research it yourself, too. You'll find no shortage of it.

If she is Pro-Palestine, why does she refuse to acknowledge it as a genocide? Why does she call it a "war"? Why does she call the International Court of Justice's decision to take Israel to court for its war crimes "questionable"? If she believes what Israel is doing is wrong, why would she criticize it being held accountable for its crimes against humanity? If she is Pro-Palestine, why would she call an Israeli propaganda movie that paints Arabs as barbaric savages her all time favorite and complain that it's getting RIGHTFULLY negative reviews for its blatant racism, glorification of war criminal Golda Mier, and historical misinformation? Her excuse was that "she posted about a movie because she likes movies." That is an absolutely pitiful reason and being deliberately obtuse to distract from the actual issue. When you say it like that, of course it sounds harmless, but the CONTENT of the movie matters. For example: Would you call "The Birth of A Nation", a disgustingly racist white supremacy propaganda movie your favorite? Absolutely NOT. And if you did, people would rightfully question you for that. If she's Pro-Palestine, why didn't she boycott LMB when there are two Zionists on it? One of which (Johnny Goldstein) is a former IDF soldier and attends Pro-Israel events? If she's Pro-Palestine, why would she use the well-known Zionist talking points, conflating Judaism with Zionism, and saying that when people say "Zionist" they really mean "Jew"? If She's Pro-Palestine, why would she have such an issue with Stays trying to inform Felix about the Coca-Cola boycott and say they are bullies? Do you notice a pattern here? Her labeling ANY attempts at calling out Zionism to be "bullying" or "Anti-Semitic"? This is the exact rhetoric Zionists use. Once again, she can say she's Pro-Palestine, she might even actually believe that she is, but her behavior does not reflect this. Saying "My posts aren't Anti-Palestinian because I'm not Anti-Palestinian" proves absolutely nothing. Someone who can't even call the genocide a genocide is not an ally to Palestine.

She continues to hide behind "Anti-Semitism" despite me and many of my friends who called her out being Jews or of Jewish ancestry ourselves. If you look through my blog, you will see a majority of my posts are dedicated to dismantling the idea that Jews = Zionists. I have worked so hard in my community to do this in real life, and it's incredibly frustrating to see her perpetuating this harmful stereotype when us Anti-Zionist Jews are doing everything we can to separate Judaism from Zionism. She is also saying we are racist against Israelis, which is an absolutely ludicrous claim. Israeli is not a race, just like American isn't a race. Israeli is a Nationality. 75% of Jewish people are Ashkenazim, meaning European/White, and about 50% of Israelis are White. Nationality =/= Race. Her claims of racism are, again, her using terms of discrimination to distract from her blatantly Zionist posts.

Furthermore the claim that we are attacking her simply for being Israeli is not only wrong, it makes no sense. I was not aware that she was Israeli before suspecting her of being a Zionist. A huge chunk of Zionists are actually Western Christians who support Israel for Anti-Semitic reasons, and I would NEVER sabotage a fellow Jew for their identity. I went out of my way to emphasize this in the first post. Gimmeurtmi was called out for Zionism that me and several other people in the community recognized, point blank period. We are not "painting her in a specific light", we are bringing attention to harmful, dangerous things SHE said. If I presented her posts to you without commentary, even in context, you could come to the same conclusion. The original callout post was edited many times with many additions as new screenshots/information came forward, and it was through the comments from other people talking about their experience with her that we found out that she was Israeli and had made those Anti-Palestinian posts on October 7th (which she deleted). It was her thinly-veiled Zionism that originally raised our suspicions, the knowledge that she's Israeli came after.

I know gimmeurtmi will continue to see herself as a victim no matter what. I know she will keep pretending she's being attacked for her identity just as all Zionists do. This post is just to disprove her accusations that we called her out on the basis of "racism", when the callout for her was a result of HER racism herself. I never had any problem with gimmeurtmi before she blocked me, I enjoyed her fics and looked up to her, as many others in the community did. She gave me no reason to dislike her before this. The only reason my friends and I put that post together was because we felt it was imperative that someone like her, who uses her SKZ blog to normalize Zionist ideology amidst a genocide, gets de-platformed. I cannot tell you what to believe, but I urge you to be careful and understand what a manipulative person she is. I urge you to read the screenshots of her posts for yourself and come to your own conclusion.

[sapphic-agent]

I think the only reason for Izu to not see the corruption anymore even when he is a prime victim of it...it's bc of bk. Really. Hori went out of his way to make BK "it's not so bad" and did the same for us, AIZAWA and Endy.

Hori shut the victim's voice.

I can say with confidence here...all Izu's issues in writing and outside steem from BK's existence and how much Hori loves him.

Bc there no excuse for a person who was abused 12 years given or take to be so naive. Izu defending ua and Aizawa is baffling as Aizawa wanted to expell him day 1

Izu worshipping am is baffling as am doesn't deserve his adoration bc the man did the abre minium (and that is better than what Inko, his mom, did)

Izu liking A1 is baffling too since they are siding with the abuser.

MHA is a story where the abuser won.

Izu is silent

Shiga is put down bc he is the bad vicitm.

Yeah, the way MHA treats its victims as opposed to its abusers is... Mind boggling.

Touya's backstory retconned so much of the Todoroki lore and anyone can see it was an attempt to make Endeavor look more human. And in the process, Touya and Rei were demonized even more

Bakugou gets sympathy and admiration from everyone. Izuku gets made fun of and ignored. Even when someone does show concern for his well-being, it's either a) never talked about further or b) made into someone else's- Bakugou's- moment

Dabi's reveal ended up resulting in the rest of the Todorokis supporting Endeavor, not a word about Rei's pain or trauma. Nope, she's just there to help Endeavor's redemption

Hawks and Nagant were turned into child soldiers and forced to kill by the HPSC. Do they get autonomy or retribution? Never. Hawks continues to be their brainwashed soldier and Nagant fades into the distance. Even worse, Hawks is used to prop Endeavor's- another abuser- redemption

Eri escaped her abuser so she should be healing in peace, right? WRONG. She mutilates herself for the so-called heroes

Izuku loses OFA, only to comfort Bakugou who's devastated by this for whatever reason even though he was the one who made Izuku feel worthless for being quirkless in the first place

Kotaro is a grown man who purposely abused his children, right? But screw that, Nana is to blame even though she did what she did to protect him. And also, no one told him to abuse his kids

The only ones who are treated fully as abusers are AFO and Overhaul. But, well, we know what a disaster AFO was and how terribly Tomura towards the finish was written so it really didn't matter in the end, did it?

[tirfpikachu]

when someone says that women weren't allowed to do xyz until a certain date mainstream tras might give a side look like hmm :/ this isn't inclusive of trans folks... but otherwise leave it alone.

but if you say that specifically cis/bio women and transmasc ppl weren't allowed to open their own bank account until 1974, suddenly you're making the transfems feel a bit too privileged and it causes a riot bc you're pointing out that amab/male folks used to have an INSANE amount of privilege on the basis of being born "amab" and even if they were super gnc, they still had that privilege from birth. to this day, cis/bio men and transfems do NOT go thru many specific struggles that cis/bio women and transmascs experience. but that's somehow controversial as FUCK to say in most tra spaces. why?

fr why is that? why?? why are transfems so fucking oversensitive to anyone pointing out that they're not oppressed on every single axis of oppression? meanwhile transmascs are bending over backwards being super fucking supportive of transfem rights and having so much nuance about things without much knee-jerk defensiveness at all. could it be that perhaps... hmm... "amab" upbringing does not teach amab/male folks what it's like to face misogyny, so they often do not enter feminist spaces, and now that they enter leftist spaces they don't know that we're all about intersectionality and nuance and acknowledging the ways one might be privileged in some ways and disprivileged in other ways? instead of showing allyship to cis/bio women and transmascs, transfems and their more extreme allies instead sit on their thrones and get offended whenever anyone implies that they might need to be good allies too. why is that?? why are cis/bio women and transmascs enabling that behavior so much?

hmmm it's almost like how afab/female folks are conditioned to excuse inappropriate behavior from amab/male people from a very young age... almost like the stereotypical One Of The Boys (in this case Males) trope, trying to be a Cool Girl (or Cool Trans Boy) to be validated by the ones in charge, the amabs, who are just poor sweet misunderstood cinnamon rolls uwu. i think mainstream tras really idolize transfems. which comes from a sweet place, and might feel good, but also means you're infantilizing them like precious perfect little princesses who can do no wrong. that might be validating for transfems ─ who doesn't like being coddled every now and then? ─ but also means not holding them accountable the way we're supposed to hold EVERYBODY accountable in leftist spaces. or at least that's what we generally pride ourselves in, right? isn't that supposed to be a leftist thing? intersectionality and all that?

and this is why so many cis/bio women and transmascs are joining radblr. this is why even some transfems are saying okay, this is too much now, and actually seek out female/afab voices and hear their povs and apologize for how they're treated by tras. the tables are starting to turn. people are too fed up with this shit. we are getting muzzled for talking about the most basic feminist stuff ever, things that back in the day oldschool trans folks were WAAYYYY more likely to see as common sense and feminism 101. systems of oppression are complex. you can talk about how hard transmisogyny is, and you'll get sympathy from most of us, but you gotta listen to how hard anti-female/afab misogyny is and how we're uniquely persecuted in specific ways you aren't. and you gotta work hard to learn how to be a good ally to us, you gotta research, you gotta learn. so many transfems have no fucking clue how to do that. so many cis/bio women and transmascs are acting like their loud guard dogs too, coddling them, speaking for them, enabling them. it's leading to really bad shit to happen. it's enabling transfems-on-female/afab abuse and bigotry... and you just sweep it all under the rug, say it was just a "terf" roleplaying, it must be a troll, it doesn't matter. it's just one or two victims, why should we even care about them? why make any changes to prevent further victims? that's such a classic male apologist mindset!!! this shit is not okay. we will never accept that bs.

you need to clean up all the misogyny and homophobia in your spaces or the only sane folks will come to radfems and find actual nuanced discussions about oppression, and you'll be left with crazies. if y'all are gonna act like oversensitive toddlers then radblr is gonna be where it's at for real leftist activism. enjoy your little tra circus ig 👋

[geotjwrs]

can I ask for another part of no one's home pls?

beneath of it

Pairings ; Wednesday Addams x Male!Reader

Warning/s ; none

The days following that conversation were even harder than you imagined. Wednesday's request for a second chance lingered in your mind, replaying in an endless loop. Could you trust her again? Could you forgive her? Could you forgive yourself for even wanting to?

The hallways of Nevermore felt colder now. You and Wednesday didn't cross paths often, but when you did, there was always that heavy, unspoken tension between you. She would glance at you, her expression unreadable, but you never lingered long enough to figure it out. You wanted space; you needed it.

Yet, somehow, the universe seemed intent on forcing you two together.

It was late in the evening when Enid, Wednesday's roommate and one of the few people who had noticed the distance between the two of you, found you sitting by the edge of the forest. She approached cautiously, her usual bubbly energy dampened by the weight of concern.

"Y/N?" Enid's voice was soft, almost hesitant. "I've been meaning to talk to you."

You sighed, leaning back against the tree behind you. "If this is about Wednesday, I really don't want to hear it, Enid."

Enid sighed as she sat down next to you, brushing her long, colorful hair over her shoulder. "Look, I know what happened. Not everything, but... enough."

You turned to her, surprised. "She told you?"

She nodded. "Not exactly in a heartfelt, soul-bearing way—she's still Wednesday—but she mentioned that she messed up. That she hurt you."

You rubbed your hands together, feeling the familiar sting of heartache. "She kissed Tyler. She never even kissed me. And then... she called me a burden."

Enid winced. "I'm sorry. That's... yeah, that's harsh."

"It broke me, Enid," you said, your voice barely a whisper. "I don't know how to move past that."

Enid was silent for a moment before placing a hand on your shoulder. "You know, Wednesday isn't exactly the best at handling feelings. She's never been the type to open up or admit when she's wrong. And if she told you she wants a second chance, that's her way of saying she... cares."

You snorted bitterly. "Cares? She cared enough to kiss Tyler."

Enid shook her head. "That was a mistake. A huge one. But Tyler? That's a whole different mess, and you need to know the truth."

A knot of unease formed in your stomach. "What do you mean?"

Enid hesitated, then glanced around to make sure no one was listening. "You know Tyler's the Hyde, right?"

You stared at her, your heart suddenly racing. "What?"

"Wednesday's been trying to figure out who the Hyde is for weeks. She was sure it was Xavier at first, but Tyler... he's the real monster." Enid's eyes widened, trying to make you understand the weight of what she was saying. "That kiss? I think it was part of her plan. Trying to get close to him, trying to learn more about the Hyde. She was focused on the case—maybe too focused. But you have to understand, Y/N, it wasn't about him. It wasn't even about you."

The revelation hit you like a punch to the gut. Tyler was the Hyde. Wednesday kissed him as part of her investigation. But that didn't change the fact that it had still happened, that she had said things to you she could never take back.

"Why didn't she tell me any of this?" you asked, frustration building. "I could've helped."

"Because she thought you were in danger. She didn't want you involved." Enid looked at you with sympathy. "Wednesday doesn't always know how to show it, but she pushes people away when she's scared. She thought the Hyde might come after you if you got too close."

You shook your head, a bitter laugh escaping your lips. "I don't need her protection. I just wanted her honesty."

"I know," Enid said softly. "And maybe she does, too."

The next few days passed in a blur. Your mind was a storm of conflicting emotions. You felt betrayed, but you also understood why she had kept things from you. It didn't excuse her actions, but it added a new layer of complexity to the situation.

Then came the night everything changed.

Nevermore had fallen into a tense silence as word spread that the Hyde had been captured. Tyler had been taken into custody, but the damage had already been done. You hadn't seen Wednesday since the arrest, and part of you was relieved. The space between you still felt fragile, like one wrong move could shatter everything.

But late one night, as you lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, there was a knock at your door.

You didn't have to ask who it was.

You opened the door to find Wednesday standing there, her dark eyes gleaming with something you couldn't quite place. It wasn't the usual cool indifference. There was something deeper, more conflicted.

"I need to talk to you," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

You sighed but stepped aside, letting her in.

Wednesday stood in the center of your room, her hands clasped in front of her, her usual confidence replaced by something almost vulnerable. "I'm not good at this," she began, her eyes flickering to the floor. "But I know I owe you an explanation."

You folded your arms, waiting.

"I... made a mistake," she said, her voice quieter than you'd ever heard it. "With Tyler. With the case. With you. I thought I was doing what was necessary, but I hurt you in the process."

You didn't say anything, your heart pounding in your chest.

"I thought I could handle everything on my own," she continued, her voice wavering. "I thought I didn't need anyone. But... I was wrong. I pushed you away because I was afraid. Afraid that if I let you get too close, you'd get hurt. Or worse."

You clenched your fists, trying to keep your emotions in check. "You still kissed him, Wednesday. You called me a burden."

"I know," she said, stepping closer, her eyes locking onto yours. "And I regret it. I regret all of it. I didn't mean those things. I just didn't know how to handle... us."

Her admission hung in the air, raw and unfiltered. For a moment, you didn't know what to say. You had wanted this—an apology, an explanation—but now that it was here, you didn't know if it was enough.

"I don't know if I can forgive you," you said finally, your voice breaking. "Not after everything."

Wednesday looked down, her expression unreadable. "I don't deserve your forgiveness. I know that. But I do care about you, Y/N. More than I realized."

The room fell silent, the weight of her words settling between you. You stared at her, trying to make sense of everything. Could you really trust her again? Could you let her back into your heart after everything she had done?

Before you could respond, there was a sudden loud crash outside your window, followed by a low growl that sent chills down your spine. You and Wednesday exchanged a glance before rushing to the window.

The Hyde was back.

But Tyler was in custody. How could this be?

Without thinking, you and Wednesday darted outside, your heart pounding as you made your way into the dark woods. You could hear the growls growing closer, and the realization hit you like a freight train. Tyler wasn't the only Hyde. There was another.

The monster lurked in the shadows, its grotesque form illuminated by the faint moonlight. It lunged at you, but Wednesday was faster, her knife flashing in the darkness as she dodged its attack.

"Stay back," she ordered, her voice sharp. "This isn't your fight."

But you didn't listen. You weren't going to stand by and let her handle it alone—not this time.

The battle was fierce, the Hyde's monstrous strength nearly overwhelming. But together, you and Wednesday fought with everything you had. The creature was relentless, its claws slashing through the air as it tried to tear you apart.

Finally, with a well-placed strike, Wednesday brought the creature down, her breathing ragged as she stood over its fallen body. But before you could catch your breath, the creature stirred, its eyes glowing with fury.

It wasn't dead. Not yet.

The Hyde lunged again, its claws aimed directly at you. But in a split second, Wednesday stepped in front of you, taking the hit.

She gasped, her body crumpling to the ground as blood seeped from her side.

As you rushed to Wednesday's side after defeating the Hyde, you found her alive—just badly hurt. Her breathing was shallow, but she was far from the brink of death.

"Wednesday, hang on. I've got you," you said, your voice trembling with concern.

She opened her eyes, grimacing as she clutched her side. "I'm... fine," she muttered, her pride refusing to let her admit how much pain she was in.

You helped her to her feet, your arm supporting her as she winced. Despite the pain, she refused to show weakness. "We need to get back to Nevermore," you said urgently.

"I can walk," she insisted, her expression cold but faltering for a moment.

Still, you didn't let go. "I'm not leaving you to handle this alone anymore, Wednesday. We're in this together. Whether you like it or not."

There was a pause. Wednesday looked at you, something different in her eyes now—an unspoken understanding. She didn't argue this time.

Once back at Nevermore, the aftermath of the fight lingered in the air. The faculty and other students rushed to deal with the Hyde situation. Tyler may have been caught, but the existence of a second Hyde shook everyone.

In the infirmary, Wednesday sat quietly as a medic stitched up her side. You hovered nearby, refusing to leave her. She had taken a hit for you—something she would never openly admit was driven by care. Yet, there was no denying it. You could see it in her eyes, in the way she had thrown herself in harm's way.

After the medic left, the room fell into silence again. Wednesday looked up at you, her face still pale from the ordeal but her gaze as sharp as ever. "You should've left. I didn't need you getting hurt."

You shook your head. "You don't get it, do you? I wasn't going to let you fight that thing alone."

"Why?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper. For the first time, she sounded unsure. Vulnerable.

"Because I care about you," you said, the words heavy with emotion. "No matter how many times you push me away, no matter how many walls you put up, I still care. And that's not going to change."

Wednesday's expression shifted, her usual mask of indifference cracking just slightly. She looked away, her voice softer than before. "I don't deserve it. Any of it."

You stepped closer, sitting on the edge of her bed. "Maybe you don't think you do, but I still want to give it. I want to try again. But this time, we do it differently. No more pushing each other away. No more lies."

She looked at you then, her dark eyes searching yours. "I won't make promises I can't keep," she said, her voice careful. "But I'll try."

That was all you needed to hear.

Over the following days, things between you and Wednesday began to shift. She was still Wednesday—cold, sarcastic, and not the type to suddenly become affectionate. But there were subtle changes. She would sit with you at lunch, even if she pretended it was because she "needed a distraction." She would find excuses to be near you, even though she claimed it was because you "were less annoying than most people."

And sometimes, late at night, when she thought no one was watching, you'd catch her glancing your way, a fleeting softness in her gaze.

It wasn't a perfect second chance. Wednesday still had her thorns, and there were moments when she reverted to her distant self. But it was different now. You weren't afraid of getting hurt, and she wasn't afraid to let you in—at least, a little bit.

One evening, as you both sat in the darkened library, Wednesday quietly reading while you worked on an assignment, she spoke without looking up from her book.

"I saw you," she said suddenly.

You blinked, confused. "Saw me what?"

"That night," she clarified, still not looking at you. "When I kissed Tyler. I saw you watching."

Your heart skipped a beat at the memory. It still stung, even now. "Yeah. I remember."

"I didn't know what I was doing then," she admitted, her voice low. "I thought it was part of the plan. But when I saw the look on your face... I realized it wasn't just a case. I had hurt you. More than I should have."

You didn't say anything at first, letting her words sink in. This was as close to an apology as you'd get from Wednesday Addams.

"I hated you for it," you admitted softly. "But I hated myself more for still caring."

She finally looked at you then, her expression unreadable. "I won't kiss him again."

It was a strange way of promising something deeper—something more than just avoiding mistakes. But it was enough for now.

You nodded. "Good. Because I'd prefer you didn't."

There was a brief silence before she spoke again, her voice softer. "I've never had this before. I don't know how to handle it."

You gave her a small smile. "Neither do I. But we'll figure it out together. One step at a time."

And for the first time, Wednesday didn't have a sarcastic retort. She simply nodded, closing her book and resting her hand on the table between you—just close enough that, if you reached out, you could touch it.

You didn't yet, but the gesture was enough. For now.

[oswalish]

rahhhh random rant because i’m angry hater mood i HATE HATE HATE people who think miss goldberg did anything to marvin. saw someone go “set those sails is a villain song and people need to accept miss goldberg is a bad person” i’m screaming and crying and clawing at the walls you don’t fucking understand it you don’t understand the goddamn musical.

in trousers is at its core about misogyny, that is its core theme, which is shown by how marvin hurts the women in his life, specifically his wife, his sweetheart, and miss goldberg. it would conflict the themes and narrative if miss goldberg hurt marvin, as this would diminish what marvin does to the other women. marvin does come up with excuses for his actions/ tries to garner sympathy in the musical (im talking 1979 vers here, i’m not as well versed on the 1985) he is immediately hit with trina shutting him down with her telling us how his actions have hurt her more than they’ve hurt him.

another thing is that the women are mostly not themselves, but rather versions of themselves that exist in marvin’s head. this doesn’t apply to trina, as she is the only woman in the musical who tells her own story. for example, your lips and me and its reprise tell us very specifically events that are happening in her life and how she’s feeling, she also tells her about her past. she also addresses marvin directly in breakfast over sugar.

whereas his sweetheart and miss goldberg do not have songs like this. “my highschool sweetheart” doesn’t tell us anything about his sweetheart other than that she’s his sweetheart, she’s a person, and that she wants marvin to pay attention to her more. but there honestly isn’t much in the musical to confirm that she actually is a person at all, she insists her own existence but marvin never pays attention to her or even addresses her existence, in childhood or adulthood.

miss goldberg is interesting. she doesn’t play into marvin’s fantasy and feels like more of a real person than his sweetheart, having her own personality and opinions. she also sings i am wearing a hat where she seems to tell part of a story that could be her own, though it doesn’t really get more specific than “i’m wearing a hat, i am unloved”. she never quite seems to behave like a schoolteacher either, within the story she seems to be more of a narrator, likely due to her importance in marvin’s story. she is the biggest case of marvin insisting his heterosexually, while also forcing him to realise he is gay. she is not actually herself within the musical, the real miss goldberg is probably nothing like her. this is an internalised version of her than marvin came up with, though it’s more authentic feeling than his sweetheart since her role is to pull marvin out of his fantasies, since she’s probably the only way marvin can actually be honest with himself and recognise his actions.

many people bring up the lines “you might tell me you’re a victim, you might get what you deserve, but i won’t excuse, boy i cant excuse, a boy who’s lost his nerve” which i will admit. do not sound great, incredibly suspicious even. but taken in the context that miss goldberg is not actually saying this to marvin, and actually it’s a version of miss goldberg that marvin has made up to make himself “behave properly” it starts to make sense.

marvin victimises himself a LOT. he’s self aware enough to recognise when he does wrong but tends to refuse to believe that it’s truly his fault, and that he’s the victim somehow. this is pretty obvious in falsettos but it’s also true in in trousers. he sings a lot of songs trying to portray himself as the victim, facing a lot of opposition from the women. this is shown in How Marvin Eats His Breakfast where he is sure that he’s in the right and is the victim because he’s not getting what he wants, and the women in the song directly oppose him by describing all the insane things he’s doing and even insulting him. it’s also shown in The Nausea Before the Game, where he’s lamenting about how his life is so hard, and how trying to live up to societies expectations is nauseating (this is a very simplified analysis of the song, i do actually thing marvin’s feelings in this song are valid but that’s an entirely different conversation). the song transitions into his wife singing about how she met him, how he ghosted her for weeks but then came back. that part of the song is much more tragic than marvin’s, essentially telling the listener that while his feelings are valid, he also seriously hurt and damaged this woman, and that that cannot be forgotten. the musical never ever lets us believe that marvin is the victim, despite his insistence.

and then every pony, is what i think the first line of that quote is referring to. how marvin is convinced that he is the victim, he is telling *himself* that. and the part of himself who knows that isn’t true manifests as miss goldberg to tell him that no, no you aren’t. no matter what marvin says, he will never be the victim, he is the one hurting others.

“you might get what you deserve” is slightly more difficult. i can’t really tell if it’s positive or negative. it could either refer to how he got what he deserved by being in a loveless marriage, or how he got what he deserved by leaving his wife and kids (and bird) to leave with whizzer. personally i think it’s the second, going with how marvin is convinced that he’s the victim, he’s convinced him leaving his wife for whizzer is what he deserves after going through so much. he thinks he deserves something good for once. and like yay bro for breaking out of your forced heterosexuality but did you have to destroy your wife’s entire life in the process? when i say marvin isn’t a victim i do mean in the context of the musical, marvin is very much a victim of society and heteronormativity, but he is NOT a victim of any of the women in the musical, which he likes to pretend he is. it’s easier to blame them than himself.

“but i won’t excuse, boy i can’t excuse, a boy who’s lost his nerve.” much simpler to understand, the miss goldberg inside marvin’s head is very much the voice of outside influence, aka wider society, the one that expects him to conform. she can’t excuse him “loosing his nerve” by deciding to cheat on his wife with a man and run away with said nerve.

anyway i hope this yap session help y’all understand that marvin was never harmed by miss goldberg (nor do i think he did anything to her, other than probably be off putting and creepy like an average 14 year old is) i doubt anyone will see this but i loooooove talking about this stupid musical so ask questions please please please or else i’ll post 5 MILLION of these because i can’t stop thinking about this musical

[arafilez]

੭୧ ⼂ LIES YOU BUILT ﹗

ー☆ㅤㅤ [ kwh x reader ] ㅤ੭𓂃 ㅤangst, no comfort, bsf to strangers ㅤ warnings crying, woonhak is a little toxic ㅤ﹢ㅤ1k wc

Kim Woonhak,

It’s stupid how you still have a mark in my life, the smallest importance with the biggest meaning. Your footprints over my soul never washed away, instead, they stay, stubborn and scratched, like rock carvings. To put it simply I hate you. That is pretty straightforward, isn’t it? I am like that, I have always been like that. Oh, wait you know that already. You used to find me simple, you loved that. Said we completed each other. Now, I cry in my bed thinking about all the lies you fed me about being best friends forever.

Oh, the lies you mastered so well!

I regret every one of those days I had called you up just so I could update you on my life. Every single secret, every laugh, and every tear I had told you of and every bit of our shared stories. I used to be interesting to you, so when did I become so boring that you had to find newer, more popular and cooler friends? What happened to our late-night chats, the ones till three where we both had to hide from our parents with excuses? Where are the stories now? Did you forget them as easily as you threw away our friendship? Did you tell your new friends my stories just so you could get a good laugh out of them? A good laugh out of the class’s lame bitch’s stories- yeah I believe you can do that. If anyone told me a year ago that Kim Woonhak is doing this I would have laughed at their faces. Now, I am the one who scoffs and tells those to the few classmates who feel sympathy for me.

Pathetic! I am pathetic!

There is still no note, no explanation, not a single sentence you said about this while I hold on to the thread loosely binding the last pieces of our friendship. Every time I asked you what was wrong you had one word, “Nothing.” Where was I wrong? I think I was wrong to put my trust in you. Tell me why you left our friendship as if it was not even worth the dirt under your shoe? Tell me why am I still hung up on our last conversation even if it was just you taking advantage of me and wanting my notes? Tell me, did I become lame after you found friends who are more popular than me? Tell me, was I lame the way I behaved? Or was it the way I became loud when I got excited or the way I laughed? Did that make you leave and go to your new friends who have the “cool” aura? How could you take everything I love and crush it so easily? Are your fingers that strong Woonhak?

What happened to our years of friendship Woonhak? Why does this hurt more than any break-up ever did? Why does every time now a simple, sub-important friendship breaks or an argument happens with my friends do I hurriedly apologise multiple times even if I was not in the wrong? Why does it always me feel maybe I am the rotten apple among my friends? Why does your face drop in my mind every time I think I am not enough? Why I am still hung up on you when I have so many newer friends who actually appreciate me? Why do I still picture myself in the mirror arguing with you and putting you in your place with my words and my confidence? Confidence I have only when I am alone? Why do I fantasize about a time you even feel a little fucking sorry for doing all this?

I have so many questions for you, questions I never got to ask and questions that formed later. What did I do for you to break this friendship? Where was I wrong? Why did you start ignoring me that Tuesday when we talked on Monday? Why did you make sure your whole new friend circle hate me? Why did you make fun of me with them? How could you do that? Did our friendship mean nothing to you? Was it that worthless? Was I wasting that much of your time?

Do you think I am being dramatic? Then explain this!

I have so many friends, but every time a minor crack appears, my insecurities build up. Insecurities that weren’t there till you crafted them. Insecurities that weren’t there till you made fun of me in front of me only. Insecurities that weren’t there before you decided to blatantly ignore me one day after our years of friendship. Insecurities that weren’t there until you decided the term best friend is not for me anymore. I would say we both drew blood, and we both got hurt, but were those cuts ever equal?

This is all very straightforward, isn’t it? That’s the second time I am asking you that. Because damn hell, it is. It is my rawest and truest emotions and I don’t want to twist my words to let you know this, which you never will. The worst part of the whole thing is that you will never read this, I will never send this and this will not get you a scratch but it is jabbing my heart multiple times. Twisting the knife you crafted especially for me and pushing it in repeatedly. Why would you do this all to me? Can we talk? Is there something there you never told me and let it build inside you? Or am I just simply horrible? I wish I could let it go, I have tried so many times but I can’t. I wish I could forgive you but what should I forgive you and your cocky, small-minded friends for? Nothing! It is terrible how you come into my mind whenever the smallest incident occurs and I think of telling you, and then it hits me again.

You are still everything to me while I am nothing to you!

From Y/n

ー☆ㅤㅤ [ ara's notes ] ㅤ੭𓂃 ㅤ is this self-indulgent? yes, a lot! i will be back with bonedo fluff tho TT ㅤ𓏧ㅤ library ㅤ bnd shelfㅤ navi

੭ 𝅄ㅤ ꒰ TAGLIST ꒱ ㅤ⏤ㅤ @haneagerr @slytherinshua ㅤ𓏧ㅤ fill this or comment or ask to be added.

ㅤㅤ(ㅤㅤ© arafilez on tumblrㅤㅤ)

[thewayuarent]

Handling an addiction. Part 1.

Cause oh we need to have this conversation

Disclaimer: I am not a professional, and I won’t pretend to be. This is based on my personal experience as someone who is/was in several relationships with people who struggle from different forms of addiction. I want to clarify that I do understand all characters and while I’m going to critique them I do not blame them. The very important thing to remember is that it's a very complicated topic and there is no clear right answer to it. Let's keep in mind that any conversation about any difficult topic is always mostly one-sided and it's impossible to talk about everything once. This is about addiction and only about it, but all characters are way more then that one topic. Are we good now? Let's go.

So, let’s talk about Ray’s addiction and how people in his life are failing to handle it. 

The most important thing to remember is: addiction is a disease. By definition of most medical associations all over the world. Addiction is not a personal choice. And while it doesn’t excuse Ray’s behaviour throughout the show, it explains it. And this is a big difference. Ray as a character is much more than just his addiction, absolutely. But his addiction is a huge part of who he is and how he behaves and we need to constantly remember about it.

This conversation begins every week after every episode. Most people who seem to understand the complexity of his situation are also people who have a lot of sympathy and understanding towards him, and this is great. There are also a lot of people who feel towards him mostly annoyance and desire for him to stop without understanding why he can't - and this list starts from characters in the show. It’s, again, understandable. It’s also the worst thing you can do towards someone who struggles from addiction. 

So let’s start from Ray’s friend group and we’ll go from the least harmful to most harmful characters’ behaviour.

Boston. Yeah, shockingly, I know. But the fact is - Boston actually has the best-ish (from the worst so it’s not a high ground here) approach towards Ray’s addiction. And why? Well, cause he doesn’t give a fuck and doesn’t pretend to do. Boston is way far from the good support system Ray actually needs but at least he never judges Ray for his habits. He won’t help him, sure, but he won’t damage him harder (well, he is, but on a different topic).

We don’t actually know a lot about this friend group dynamic outside of their current drama and one episode happened two years ago. But we kind of can assume (cause Mew said it twice - in episodes 1 and 6) that Boston at least on some level was periodically responsible for taking Ray home. Which is really weird for me, by the way, cause both times Mew said Boston will take care of him Boston was also drinking. Not on Ray’s level, but still not in a shape to drive. But whatever. 

Don’t get me wrong, Boston is a shitty friend. He’s the one called Ray a burden in episode 1 which led to Ray rushing out.

And he intentionally targets Ray more than once towards the show about Mew, which is absolutely harmful and not helpful (can we talk about the weird obsession Boston has about Ray and Mew having sex? Like dude relax, nobody cares. Well, Top does).

He is absolutely not someone you want to have in your support system while trying to heal (not if Ray’s trying but we’ll get to that in part 2). But at least he is honest about not wanting to handle an addict. And the truth is: no one in this friends group wants to. And it’s fine, actually, more on that in a minute. But oh the level of hypocrisy the other two have.

Cheum. So, I truly don’t understand what the show is trying to tell us with this one. It’s either a clear critique on the hypocrisy people tend to have towards addicts or an attempt to show how addiction ruins not only people with it but also their surroundings. And if it’s the second one then I have a problem with how it’s shown.

There is a gold rule of cinema: show, don’t tell. We are told more than once that Cheum and Mew were actively trying to stop Ray. But what we’re actually shown is way different. The thing is, they are college kids. They drink a lot. They party a lot. And if we see this group all together they are either in university or drinking (except for the iconic pool scene). And specifically Cheum seems to get drunk pretty often. So while we’re told they tried to help Ray we’re shown only how they actually (unintentionally!!) support his behaviour or ignore it. And what should I think?

I think that they missed the point when Ray’s habits became an actual addiction. And I understand why - it’s a very easy thing to miss. I think that before his suicide attempt they did’t notice his mental struggles. I think after that they were shocked and scared and they didn’t know how to handle it so they chose to ignore it. This is a very common reaction and it’s understandable. 

The very important moment to remember is they don’t owe Ray anything. They can choose to help him and support him or not to deal with it. Handling an addiction is so hard and frustrating and exhausting for every participant. And if they choose to not get themselves into it - it’s normal. It doesn’t make them bad people, as choosing to help doesn't make somebody a better person. It’s a choice and every choice matters.

But if you make this choice - be true to it. Don’t play the “I tried to help you but you don’t want it so it’s on you” card. People with addiction didn’t choose to be that way. But people in their lives? They have an actual choice. No one will judge you if it’s not for you (at least normal people won’t). It’s honestly way better than staying only to constantly remind an addict how bad he is - he knows it already.

The thing I have to say to Cheum is - go away. It’s harsh, but it needs to be said. Don’t lie to yourself or Ray. Tell him (in very careful way) that you are tired, that you can’t handle it, that he needs help you can’t provide. Or stay, but do your research and prepare yourself to long hard work. But don’t continue to constantly drink with him to then be surprised why he can’t get better. Cheum is absolutely not responsible for Ray's actions. But she is responsible for hers. 

The one time I was almost agree with her was that scene.

Because bringing drugs was a very fucked up thing to do - Ray puts at risk not only himself but the whole group and he deserves to be called out on that. But. She continues to put all the blame on Ray - the thing she does the whole episode and it’s just frustrating as hell -  forgetting about Mew. Mew, who actually has a lot of responsibility in that situation.

Mew. Well, he does the worst thing you can imagine to do with a person like Ray. I get it, he’s hurt, I totally understand why he does what he does. I don't think he intends to hurt Ray. But.

Mew forgets a critically important thing here - can you guess which one? - right, that Ray is an addict. Mew can do all this stuff and be fine afterwards. It is always a risk that he won’t, of course, but his superiority complex tells him he’ll be fine. And I also think so - I mean, he's a young adult, he can try partying and drinking and drugs and be totally okay after.

He can turn back. Ray can’t.

Mew did help Ray in his worst moment that one time two years ago, and it is worth remembering. And after that Mew tried his best to distance himself from Ray’s struggles - again, understandable. He was trying to talk with Ray and while it was really bad - I still give him the benefit of a doubt. He is young, he’s not a specialist, he didn’t do any research and he thinks it might work.

But a moment he decides to let loose he turns to Ray for help. Because Ray will never judge him - both cause his idolisation and cause it’s not his place to judge, he does all this stuff himself. And this is absolutely terrible. I’m sorry, but it is. Mew, the same as everyone else, doesn’t owe Ray his help or time or support. But while it is not necessary for him to help Ray, it is a necessity to not actively - and this time intentionally - support him in this.

For Mew everything happening is episode 8 is a journey, a new experience. For Ray it's a fucking relapse.

He knows Ray is an addict. He just doesn’t care at the moment. But it can be so, so dangerous for Ray. Mew started this spiraling down journey, but it’s Ray who will end up at the bottom.

And for everyone who says Ray is also an active participant - he is. But he is not. He has a disease. And he gets in a situation where a person he idolises, his favourite human being, finally doesn’t judge him. Instead, Mew supports him. Mew wants to be like him. Can you imagine even a possibility where Ray in this situation says no? It’s impossible, not in the state he’s in right now.

And this is why I critisize this friend group. This is why they deserve to be criticized. Because this is a depiction of how these things work in reality too. You don't have to help him. But the least thing you can do - if you deside to stay in his life - is to have a compassion towards him and don't get him worse.

In part two I will talk about Ray’s current state and of course about the one person who kind of does the better job here - and why Sand is able to do it.

[ilikekidsshows]

Usually I like a character with a red flag, that's why my list of favorite characters is mostly villain or dark hero because there's something intriguing about that type of character. For some times I've been wondering why Marinette just turned me off despite having the personality trait that I usually like and reading your responses to your asks just make me realize why.

She just has no interesting background story to back her red flagness. ._.

It just like you said, Naofumi has a reason why he choose to abandoned his heart and compassion. And it's not just Naofumi. Most if not all the fallen hero or villain characters has something, a reason, why they become a villain or fallen hero. Marinette has none.

She's. Just. Being. Spoiled. Rotten.

Even as a hero she also has nothing that make her as interesting character, she's literally a normal girl with a normal life who happen to part time as a hero just because a magical jewel happened to appear on her room.

I've seen people said Adrien has no motivation to be a hero, but I'd say it's Marinette who has none. Because if she has motivation to be a hero then she won't be as passive as she is.

Also, lately I've seen news about some DEI companies hiring that happened overseas and of there's DEI hiring in miraculous, Marinette would definitely be it. Because there's nothing bout her that screamed a hero, she just doesn't has it in her. I mean this is a girl who would wither away in almost every little inconvenience possible, she doesn't have that conviction to be a hero or even protecting anyone. If your hero need external validation for every inconvenience then maybe they're not a hero and shouldn't be one.

---

Exactly. Also, just like a lot of people are saying, Marinette’s descent into villainy could be interesting if that was what the writers were intending to do. If the point was that Marinette’s past of being coddled, excused and validated at every turn has led her to consider others as nothing more than existing for her benefit, that could be interesting in how the story chooses to tackle and resolve that. But that’s very much not what is happening. We’re supposed to side with her or at least be ready to forgive her the instant her lip wobbles and she cries about what a terrible person she is again. We’re supposed to think she’s justified or just stressed out. All of our sympathy should go to her instead of her victims just because she is Marinette, the greatest Ladybug ever.

Shows with villain or fallen hero protagonists acknowledge that what their protagonist is doing is morally wrong, so they put effort into making that protagonist someone you want to root for in other ways. They make the villainy over the top and entertaining, they give the protagonist an understandable reason to act the way they do so that the viewer can get into their head, or they make the opposition of the protagonist even worse and therefore deserving of comeuppance. I very much enjoyed Death Note in my youth while fully realizing Light was a villain protagonist, because the story does all of these things at some point during the manga's run.

Episodes like ‘Derision’, ‘Adoration’ and ‘Confrontation’ make it seem like the writers were, on some level, aware of Marinette’s lack of rootability, but they couldn’t bring themselves to cause her enough hardships to bring her to the level of characters like Naofumi. Chloé traumatized Marinette a year before the show, but in a way that it doesn’t really affect her at all except to excuse the way she acts around Adrien. Chloé and Lila try to frame Marinette for theft but fail immediately. Chloé and Lila mess with everyone’s school forms and something that should be resolved with everyone in class complaining instead requires Marinette to break the law to “expose” Lila and Chloé, but even that was a single-episode plot.

Despite all these efforts, the problem of rootability still persists, however, in that, outside of these two very specific characters, everyone is constantly showering Marinette or Ladybug in adoration. She isn’t entitled to the things she claims she is, like Adrien, and she isn’t enough of an underdog to justify her stepping on others to get to what she wants. But she still does it. She only hangs out with her friends to order them around to help her accomplish her goals and she constantly requires emotional support from the people around her for her nonexistent or self-caused problems while offering none in return.

[blank468]

My somewhat final thoughts of My Hero Academia

Note: Now that MHA is now doing an epilogue and is ending soon, I might as well give my final thoughts about this series. I’ll probably continue to talk more about it after the series is officially over but I’m not going to do a full fledged hour long review because I have better things to do.

This is a generic shonen empowerment fantasy that managed to screw its own theme and message. Any good will I would’ve given to series at the beginning is completely irrelevant as it when on. The morals and themes are constantly changing to throw random s**t on a sheet of paper that either doesn’t make sense, contradicts what being shown on screen, or if it doesn’t fits the tone of the story. My hero is not a deconstruction of the shonen genre that does anything new that would make it stand out. Most of the ideas and plot points created either have horrible execution, given no amount of attention where they’re just ignored or just have horrible payoffs. It follows all the exact same tropes seen in every other series and makes them worse. It also gets to the point where it rips off Naruto and makes the same mistakes it did. The amount of plot twists that are excused as some kind of subversion are obnoxious and predictable where’s it gets incredibly annoying. The world building is horrendous and just makes the story feel small for a world that has a life changing impact. The power scale doesn’t always make sense and it does nothing but act as a way to reward characters that didn’t earn it.

It has a dangerous and horrible message for victims of abuse and bullying. My hero has no problem telling the audience that if you’re a victim of any kind of abuse, it’s your problem and you should just act like it’s not a big issue. Apparently it’s ok lie to your friends, family and colleagues that you can trust but it’s not ok to lie or even hold accountable to your abuser. And no matter if he/she has a reason for the way they are, you are always in the wrong and you should spend your sad life praising and benefiting them.

There exists way too many characters for the audience to be invested in and after watching them for several arcs, they are just stereotypes with nothing new or original about them. Many of them come across as either being stupid, annoying, useless, unlikeable, petty, ignorant or just both. Some characters will either exist to benefit others or just highjack the story, ruining every other character’s chance to get any sort spotlight. The series is way too reliant on putting focus on unpleasant and uninteresting characters to please its large audience. The humor is way too reliant on a character’s personality trait. No matter what they do, the story expects us to automatically like them regardless of how horrible and selfish their actions are. Izuku may not be the worst character, but he’s no where near as great as everyone hypes him up to be. Bakugo is an unbearable mess of a character that serves no real purpose in the story and exists to take away every characters chance of development. His development is one of the laziest and obnoxious parts I have ever seen in any story and yet he’s the most popular sadist in the show with no sort of reason or sympathy for me to like him. Any criticism given to this d**khead is automatically shot down and people like me get harassed and called a brain dead immature f*g for stating our opinion.

Aside from Twice and Gentle/ La Brava, these villains are not that interesting and what ever traits about them gave them something to do is absence. Shigaraki is the stories biggest wasted potential that went from being an idiot to being an incompetent idiot to benefit my left nutsack. Toga is a Mary Stu who went from being a sad and annoying character to an annoying and self centered bitch who complains after being told her actions are wrong. Dabi is just a Gary Stu who’s only interested in wanting to kill his dad. Spinner is a joke that is constantly scammed by his creator.

The only saving grace I can give to this series is the art style of the manga and some parts of the Todoroki family drama. I can even say that Horikoshi’s art style and how he designs characters and panel designs inspired me as an artist. The anime as a whole is fine but it’s not perfect, but that’s mostly because it doesn’t do a whole lot of creatively/artistic things to make it on par with the most popular anime series. As an artist, I would recommend my hero as a reference to use to improve your work. If you just want to read or watch a series that has fights that just make you feel some kind of emotion, then you might get something out of this series. It’s not even the absolute worst thing I’ve seen; I’ve seen much worse in other genres other than shonen manga. It’s just rare to find a badly written series without being surrounded by d**kriders. It’s just a disaster of a series, and I wished I spent my time during the pandemic watching another series like Demon Slayer, or Black Clover.

[alex-rambles]

Could you please do some Bill X reader headcannons with a reader who helps Bill at no cost, which Bill likes at first, but he slowly grows attached to the reader as they'll listen to him vent and help him feel better and are there to listen to him, making him close to the reader. However, Bill grows concerned for the reader with how far they'll go, and when he sees that the reader has nothing to lose and wants to see the world burn, Bill puts his plans on hold asking the reader if everything was ok, to which the reader cries

Reader is gender neutral

-Honestly his "HMMMMM" detectors were going off from the start. He just wasn't sure why.

-Were you gonna pop up later and try to trip him with "I helped you sooo much for free, now it's your turn?"

-Weeks go by. Nope nothing.

-Months. Zilch.

-One year, and you're still just helping for no reason.

-Around the two month mark is when he starts enjoying your company and starts actively seeking you out when he didn't need help

-But Bill is a prideful being and doesn't admit he wants to see a mErE hUmAn

-"No, no, I was just looking for another idiot to swindle. This is YOUR mindscape? Oopsies well since I'm here let's chat! "

-His excuses fool no one

-At first venting might be around trivial matters, such as humans being pricks when he's trying to use them

-Eventually he opens up more, and you might hear small rants about the people of the Second Dimension, and maybe, just maybe, you'll catch a few glimpses into the life he had before Bill Cipher was Bill Cipher

-And you listen. You feel sympathy

-So, he grows to care for you, which actually pisses him off a bit

-You're human, you don't deserve him and all his glory

-Attempts to talk himself out of emotions

-Truth be told, Bill is just upset because you're human. You will be dead long, long before him (...unfortunately an incorrect assumption due to his death after Weirdmaggedon)

-And eventually, when the tasks he assigns begin to get more and more absurd and impossible to complete, he watches you accept and try your best again and again

-And then,

-"The brown-haired boy? With the hat? He's figuring things out he shouldn't, and it's messing up my plans. He somehow managed to... never mind. I couldn't get rid of him. Are you comfortable-"

-"Sure, why not?"

-You said it with a smile

-This disturbs Bill on a level he didn't think possible, and he attempts to backtrack.

-"Hey, hey, I was just kidding there, kiddo... Can't have you going to the bighouse, can we?"

-After that, Bill doesn't return for a few days

-When he does come back, he seems off

-"What do you have against your world? What is wrong with you?"

-Probably came off more accusatory than necessary, but he doesn't really care until you burst into tears

-Obviously, he knows what crying is, and why it happens, but he's still incredibly uncomfortable now and has zero clue how to comfort someone in a genuine way

-"Uh... I think your eyes are leaking."

-Which only makes you cry harder.

-Honestly, whatever the reason for your grudge against the world, Bill does his best to sympathize, just as you did for him

-Were you abused or bullied? He probably was once as well

-Are you a sadistic freak? Okay, so is he

-Passion for death, chaos, and destruction? Yas, twinsies

-Either way, he'll be quiet and listen to your story

-Maybe holding your hand

-You best believe you get front row seats to Weirdmaggedon

[m3nt4llyr4v3d]

I loathe Andre Bourgeois

I hate this man so much, I hate his character, I hate how the narrative treats him, I hate how some of the fans treat him

I hate that I’m supposed to completely sympathize with a corrupt politician, but his daughter? The one he had the sole job of raising for most of her life, and obviously didn’t teach her how to act? Yeah, she’s awful, look at how she’s treating her poor father :(.

What’s that? He constantly abused his power? He literally tried to steal from Marinette’s family at some point? Erm, well he never wanted to be a politician in the first place! He had to give up his dreams cause of his awful wife :(. What do you mean he’s still intentionally using underhanded and illegal tactics to put certain laws in place, keep the public on his side, and win elections when he literally just shouldn’t do that? Well he gave up his power, so shut up!

What do you mean his constant abuse of power in his daughter’s name would literally enforce the idea that she can get away with literally anything without repercussions? No, she bullies him! What do you mean he still should’ve not indulged this since she was like, 7? Nah, she just bullied him then too! This makes perfect sense, now he doesn’t have to take a single ounce of responsibility for her parenting! That’s stupid and he should’ve been investigated by CPS literal years ago? Well Chloe’s gone, so the problem’s fixed, right? ————— I genuinely cannot believe of the fans are defending this man. I can get feeling sorry about the treatment he gets from his wife, but some of them literally try to absolve him of any and all parenting mistakes.

“Oh well, Chloe is old enough to know what she’s doing is wrong! It’s not anyone’s responsibility except hers! Everyone tried to reason with her, oh, and the one time he tried to discipline her, she said she’d call her mom! That means that he should literally never try, because she can do that!”

Except he fucking raised her like this. Him taking responsibility for the way he RAISED HER should be, I don’t know, getting her psychiatric help? Maybe actually setting boundaries? Disciplining her and making sure she doesn’t rely on his money or power? And her threatening to call her mom to complain? Do any of you genuinely think her mom is even going to answer that call? And even if you say it’s the threat itself, you should still absolutely be pinning this on Andre: he raised her to complain to him every single time she has any issue and to abuse his power constantly, this is a teaching he reinforced her entire life. She is taught to not take any responsibility and she harasses everyone because of this. She is taught to complain to someone in a higher power to fix/do everything for her. And when he does try, once mind you, to discipline her, she’s obviously not going to stop, she’s not going to reflect, because that’s not how she was taught to act.

Also the ridiculous double standard between people who completely him and not Chloe. Chloe’s mom leaving her and being verbally abusive for all of Paris to see doesn’t excuse Chloe’s actions, but I’m supposed to feel sad for Andre because Audrey is a terrible wife, and I’m just supposed to brush all his actions, including his fucking PARENTING, aside?? Not only that, people are saying that Chloe is old enough to know her actions are wrong therefore she’s not redeemable, but somehow her fucking dad is?? The grownass adult gets more sympathy? Absolutely ridiculous

You genuinely expect me to believe that I’m not supposed to feel anything other than pure vitriol towards Chloe, but sympathy towards that asshat? Get real

[affluent-havoc]

Finished Chapter 2! SPOILERS AHEAD! I must say that this chapter oddly made me dislike Makoto a bit. I genuinely thought I'd potentially dislike Byakuya in some ways more, perhaps feel a bit more upset at him than I do. On the contrary though, Makoto sucks in some ways. Which, don't get me wrong. Makoto deserves to be a flawed individual!! Golly though. For one, he really is a normie in some ways with how little he knows. How he asks so many unneeded questions, specifically when he was being dragged around by Byakuya which I get to some extent. He was very much disoriented from the whole ordeal, struggling to figure out why Byakuya of all people was interested in him specifically in regards of sleuthing about for the investigation. At the same time though, he needs to quit it with the rhetorical reciting questions that almost parrot what the other person just said. I get it's probably a bad habit of his but he need to get a grip about it. I can only extent sympathy for so long. Being a bit intentionally dramatic here by the way, but it sometimes feels like a tension killer or that it makes Makoto look a bit too dense. Don't get me started on the whole "rope" debacle too. Like, UUUUUGH! It's so obviously the extension cord Byakuya used in the library! So very obvious! Like, Byakuya took his time to bring Makoto to the library and I get Byakuya was being stubborn and not letting Makoto look at anything other than what he wanted him to look at. But it's so OBVIOUS!!! Though, I suppose I can blame a bit of this on the game design to some extent. Certainly doesn't make Makoto look smarter by any means. Maybe it's that denial where I can see Makoto's smarts shine in the trials so I feel like I'm internally being a bit harsh on him. I've seen others call him dense after all and I DO wanna look at Makoto in a positive light. I don't wanna be hating on the little bastard after all. It does get on my nerves sometimes though. and I can't lie to myself about that. Furthermore, the fact that I had to progress the trial by Hangman's Gambit-ing a slur for schizophrenic people regarding Genocide Jack. On a meta level, I get that doing D.I.D is a bit short and the full term is probably too long to do for just the second dang trial. Definitely not an excuse to use a slur that has no means being here though. Also though, in an in-world explanation, damnit, Makoto. You sure do have some shit you gotta sort out if that's what you're internally describing Jack as who, by the way, does not have schizophrenia. D.I.D and schizophrenia are very much not the same disorder. You called D.I.D a split personality multiple times which shows you know the difference. And, I can get it to some extent that, yes. This game is from the 2000s. The 2000s was definitely a more ableist time where terminology like that was flung around like it was nothing. So, in a sense of historical accuracy, I can understand why he might have said this word. I must also mention though that this isn't the first time Makoto was unnecessarily cruel to the others internally in his head. Thus, this certainly feels a bit more like a pattern of behavior for him. This is all interesting to me though with how much I've seen this side of Makoto ignored in some ways. He's surprisingly more judgmental than I feel some give him credit for. From internally thinking Taka was annoying when he first met him to finding Hifumi weird for his interests in Hifumi's own Free-time events (which I get. Hifumi isn't exactly written in the nicest light. Don't blame him for that. I blame the dated writing). I find this aspect of Makoto so intriguing though. In a way, Byakuya, the asshole of the group who dislikes everyone and mentions multiple times how he plans on following through with a murder, is less judgmental than Makoto. He said himself not to judge others by your own standards before the murder, during the investigation, and after the trial like he was the narrator of a children's book giving the moral of the story.

Fascinating...

[germygilbert]

it is like. both fascinating and infuriating to me when people downplay Liam's overdose at the end of season four

1.) I don't expect to hold addicts 100% accountable for their behavior while on drugs i think there's some play in culpability. HOWEVER:

2.) I do think that people who completely write this off and excuse this for the benefit of Fiona are pretty racist or at least have the biggest racism blinders on BECAUSE

2a.) like point blank comparing this specific act of neglect to other acts of neglect (which were no doubt terrible and traumatizing) is one thing. acting like they are on the same level or that say, monica's neglect of Carl is somehow worse is literally just racism

2b.) The choice in drug, as my girlfriend pointed out for a white caregiver to expose a black toddler in her care to, is intentional. You are meant to think about the racial dynamic at play here in regards to conversations and behavior around drug use for the last fifty plus years. Liam is a fucking BABY and you still cannot muster pretend imaginary sympathy for him? How racist do you have to be to react to this arc in this way. Has it been over a month since you called a black drug user a cr*ckhead be honest

3.) Lip losing his shit on fiona while this was happening was not an example of him "perpetuating Frank's cycle of abuse omfg

3a.) I'm not going to say Lip's behavior towards Fiona while she was being incarcerated was completely justified of course but that was their little brother who they both love dearly who might die and Lip is justifiably freaking the fuck out. this is categorically not the same thing as an abusive father yelling in order to exercise control

3b.) Your baby brother does not have the power required to exercise an abusive dynamic over you. Of course he can replicate abusive behavior as anyone who was raised by an abusive parent or otherwise can. The line of thinking that Lip is "abusing" Fiona here shows an irresponsible and, in the wrong hands, entirely dangerous misunderstanding of how and when abusive dynamics come to be

3c.) that is not even Frank's brand of abuse. I can count on one hand the amount of times that Frank uses yelling as a tactic. The name of his game is manipulation and he usually exercises it by acting overly kind to the youngest gallaghers in order to get them to participate in his insane schemes. We see him doing this to Carl and Debbie and Liam and we even hear of him doing this to lip when he was younger. He only hits Ian once and we have reason to believe that is the only time he has hit one of his children. textually. He understands he can't control Lip Ian and Fiona by series start and as such he moslty leaves them alone and occasionally even pals around with them. We SEE him discard Debbie and Carl when they begin to question him and argue against his hair brained ethically heinous schemes

4.)the narrative is indeed asking you to engage with the theme of cycles of abuse being replicated by people who mean well. During this specific arc is asking you to do so with FIONA, not Lip, FIONA, who is liam's legal guardian who she is in this moment recklessly endangering. Even if you pretend the race thing isn't there (which is extremely difficult because its place in the narrative is, as I've pointed out, intentional) Fiona still allowed a baby to eat cocaine through her neglect. You are supposed to be thinking about this. You are supposed to be comparing i in your mind to Carl's childhood injuries and Frank using drugs as a sleep sedative for infants. At all times throughout the show you are meant to be examining how many steps away each character is from being "just as bad as frank"

I know fandom is specifically designed to stomp out critical analysis but omfg.