#For now he just has an all time low pride lmao

[hauntingjasper]

We need candy Marshall and vampire Gumball!!!

Waow okay anon imma give you a lil concept, sorry for making you wait too long 🥹

My current takes on Candy Prince Marshall Lee and Vampire King Gumball

[hxyleswritesthings]

Dynamight's Omega

Katsuki's Omega is usually known for being really cheery and polite to anyone she meets (to the point that they question how she could even put up with the grump himself). One day, everyone at the agency learns that the girl herself has quite the temper and could get very territorial over her Alpha.

Author's note: I've never written a/b/o so go easy on me. I've had this idea for a while and finally had the time to put it into words. Let me know what you think and if you'd like to see more of these two :) (also: this was edited on my phone, so if anything looks wonky or like it's meant to be cut out, it probably is. I'll fix it later lmao)

Alpha!Katsuki who's mated to the sweetest little omega. Most people question how someone so soft spoken could be compatible with the blonde. Everyone knows Bakugou Katsuki comes with a very harsh demeanor. Pair that with his large frame and he is quite the force to be reckoned with. He's a far cry from being anything like his best friend Alpha!Eijirou, who often forces Bakugou to wear scent blockers at their shared agency so he doesn't stink out the whole place and scare the omegas that work for them.

The first time Bakugou’s omega ever visited the office, she was bringing him the lunch he forgot at home. She was all nervous smiles in a short sundress as she walked up to the front desk and asked to be pointed in the direction of the two hero's offices. No one working at the agency had thought anything of it at first. Everyone knew the rumors that Red Riot had a partner, and the large mating mark on her neck had them assuming she was here go see him. It wasn't until the two pro heros themselves stepped out of a meeting room and into her path that the employees realized they were very, very wrong.

The Omega's eyes lit up upon seeing the two alphas, her scent just a bit more potent now with excitement. “Hey, Kiri!” She greets the redhead with a wave before simply stepping past him to get to Bakugou.

“Omega,” The blonde’s deep voice greets, vermillion eyes watching the girl with only the kind of intensity Bakugou Katsuki could emit.

The girl grins, meeting his gaze and dipping her head for a moment in greeting. “Hi, alpha.” She doesn't shy away from his gaze as he continues to stare her down. There's a low rumble in his chest as he takes in her appearance, chest swelling with pride at his girl coming to visit him with the mark he left on display for everyone to see. She holds up the bento in her hands after a few moments, blushing some now as she becomes aware of all the eyes on them. “You forgot your lunch,” she says in way of explanation, handing it over to him. Katsuki doesn't miss the way she starts bouncing nervously, thanking her with a kiss to her temple and guiding her to his office with a hand on her lower back, her soft voice carrying down the hallway as she fills him in on her day so far.

No one says anything for a beat before excited chatter starts up and Kiri finds himself chuckling, simply announcing to come find him should anyone need anything before stalking off to his own office.

Dynamight usually kept his personal life private, so it came as a pleasant surprise when the girl kept showing up after that first visit. They learned that after she mated to Bakugou, he urged her to quit her part time job and focus on school. Her goal was to one day be a successful writer and she was always sharing her ideas with her friends. Sometimes she would bring in cookies she had made for everyone, and she was often seen stopping by to drop off coffee for the two pro heroes. Occasionally, on those days, Bakugou would be seen walking her out after a spell, her face flushed and his hair evidently out of place. More often than not, however, she brings her laptop and headphones and settles herself in Katsuki’s office to get work done. He's even come back from patrol to her napping on his couch unannounced. The next day, Pro Hero Dynamight was seen walking into his agency with blankets and a pillow in tow to make the space more comfortable for his girl. He made sure to scent everything thoroughly and reminded her constantly that his office was always open should she need it, no matter the circumstances. Days like that presented a new side to the grumpy alpha. Beneath the hard exterior and seemingly permanent scowl he was actually a lovesick fool. He looked at his girl like she put the stars in the sky herself and he was willing to do anything and everything for her, consequences be damned.

One day the omega trudges into the office, dressed down in sweats for the day. The second she walks through the door, it's evident she’s in a horrible mood. The last week had been really stressful and it was showing in the way her hair was messily thrown up and her eyes were bloodshot from crying. She stalked right past everyone in the office, having a one track mind towards the comfort of her alpha. She knew Katsuki didn't have patrol and would just be hanging around the office for the day. She figured they could order food and she could just spend a little time with him while he worked.

What she did not expect, however, was to find Katsuki, /her/ alpha, walking out of a meeting room with another woman who was laughing at something he said, her hand reaching up towards his arm. Dynamight’s omega was moving before she could think, her instincts completely kicking in as she lost rational thought. Before she realized it was happening, she had the poor woman pinned to the closest wall with an arm, lips pulled back in a snarl to show her omegan fangs.

There's a collective gasp that runs throughout the office, everyone shocked to see this kind of behavior from her. Not once had she ever indicated that she could be anything but polite. The commotion even had Red Riot peeking out of his office. Bakugou finds himself bristling at the smell of the other alpha, resisting the urge to growl at anyone who was making a spectacle out of the situation. He pushes those feelings away, taking a deep breath before calling her name. He sucks his teeth when he doesn't receive a response from her, realizing she has lost herself to her more primal instincts.

“Omega.” His voice is a bit deeper than usual with the command, fully stepping into his role as her alpha, his skin itching with the need to get her to the safety of his office. The word reaches her ears and it takes a few painstakingly slow seconds before she's submitting, fighting the urge to let out a whimper when she comes to and finally steps away. Despite being an Omega, what most people don't know, is that his girl has quite the stubborn personality and she's never been one to back down easily. It's one of the first things that had him chasing after her after they first met. He wanted an equal in his relationship - someone who was going to bite back and level with him when needed.

“If I ever catch you so much as look at-”

“Omega.” He doesn't raise his voice but ever so slightly, the deep tone telling her it's time to back off for good. Katsuki is close to snatching her up himself to carry her away before she finally shoves last his large frame and stomps into his office. He waits to hear the click of door closing before he's rushing out apologies to the poor woman and reassuring her nothing like that will ever happen again.

When he's done walking the woman out, he heads back to his office to find his sweet little omega sitting down on his couch with blankets wrapped snuggly around her shoulders and big fat tears streaming down her face. She blabbers out apologies the second she sees him, pouting. His expression softens as he takes in the sight of her and it's in that moment that he decides they can talk about her little moment another day. He knew she was having a bad week, but he had no clue it would ever turn into something like this, and his alpha is all but screaming at him to care for his mate. In a matter of seconds, he has her pulled into his lap, holding her securely to his rumbling chest in an effort to soothe her.

It was that day that everyone in the agency learned just why the Omega was with someone as harsh as Dynamight. It was clear that despite her usually bubbly personality, the girl had the kind of fire in her veins that could only rival that of her own alpha.

[worldstarz]

saving kaeya after his fight with diluc

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•

pairing: kaeya alberich x fem!knight!reader

summary: after his fight with diluc, kaeya is thrown out of the manor to fend for himself. stumbling, bleeding, and on the verge of death, he finds you.

tags: hurt + comfort ; some angst ; mutual (?) feelings ; tbh could also be seen as platonic ; pre-storyline ; not proofread ; prolly ooc i’m so sorry

cw: blood ; injuries ; mentions of violence

notes: going through my notes app that is filled to the BRIM with oc x canon pairings. i haven’t played genshin in over a year (and this blurb was originally written like two years ago lmao) but i still love my flirty slutty cryo man! anyways i altered it so it’s reader x kaeya and removed some oc stuff, but idk how to fit in an explanation on why you’re in the forest… let your imagination run wild!!!

•❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅•

kaeya stumbled out of the winery, hand trembling over his bleeding eye.

'it's fine... everything will be fine.' thoughts raced through his head. his whole entire body was throbbing in pain. it’s not like he could go back inside the winery to rest—not after a fight as nasty as that.

"diluc will be running over to some maid any second now. ha, lucky bastard," kaeya muttered.

diluc had a team of servants that he could go to. kaeya only had diluc, emphasis on had.

at the dead of night, there was no way he could get care at the cathedral. he couldn't hold in a chuckle, realizing the situation he was in. he had no one, huh? though popular, kaeya didn’t have any particularly close friends who he could spend the night with.

with that, he knew he had no choice but to pitifully limp to the favonius headquarters—a long, long walk away.

he barely made it into the forest before he fell to the ground, wheezing against a tree. his ears were ringing, but he could hear footsteps cautiously approaching him. he didn't even have the energy to lift his head.

"kaeya? what the hell are you doing out here this late?" whose voice was that...? was it an angel’s? oh, wait. angels wouldn’t swear. it was your voice.

in the state he was in, he could only muster a grunt in response. you kneeled down in front of him, and gasped at the sight of his collapsed body. "just what have you gotten yourself into this time?" you muttered. "can't stand up anymore, huh?"

you tilted his chin up, and both of you wince—him as a result of pain, you due to getting a clear view of his injuries. his blue hair, usually tied into a low ponytail, cascaded down his shoulders, caked in blood. his crimson-soaked chest rose and fell rapidly. "ooh, that is nasty. come on, lean on me. we're going to headquarters." you kneeled down to wrap your arm around his torso, gingerly lifting him up.

"well, would you look at that. that’s exactly where i was heading,” he chuckled, leaning against your body. typically, he would never accept support from another. but, with this arguably being the lowest point of his life, his pride was the least of his concerns. plus, you were just so undeniably warm. if he’s on the verge of death, then maybe being by your side wouldn’t be so bad for a final memory.

you don’t respond, your pace slower from his weight and for his comfort. silence follows. you obviously had a million questions for him—what the hell happened? did he get in a fight with an abyss mage? why was he out so late?—but you could tell he was beyond exhausted, and from the sight of his gushing wounds, getting answers was far from a priority.

the two of you arrived in the city, streets barren in the pitch black of night. the tavern was closed, so, thankfully, no drunkards were hanging about near the path.

the inside of the headquarters was equally empty. the soft glow of lanterns lit the way up the stairs to the barracks. "kaeya, where is your room?" you asked, your voiced barely above a whisper as to not wake the other knights.

"all the way at the end of the hall. but... i forgot my keys," he whispered. you could tell he was smirking.

"how sly of you. if i didn't know any better, i would've thought this was another trick of yours to be close to a lady," you responded, though there wasn’t a hint of accusation in your voice.

"ha, you know me so well."

"to my room we go." you walked further up the steps.

after a moment of silence, you mumbled, "i know you're not the type of person to sneak into a lady's room."

"i'm grateful you understand me so well."

"zip it. i don't even know your favorite color."

unlocking your door, you gently set kaeya down on your bed. you immediately get to work, removing his coat and shoes. usually, his slick tongue would say something suggestive, but tonight, he had no choice but to refrain.

even with your limited knowledge of first aid, you knew just a damp rag would do nothing to help. "i have no tools with me," you say, beginning to walk away. "i'll go grab so-"

kaeya suddenly grabbed your arm, effectively stopping both you and your sentence. he looked so... pained. "please don't go,” he whispered. you never could have expected this level of venerability from him.

"...kaeya?" you whispered, turning to face him. "i have to find a way to tend to your injuries. you're in pain, aren't you?"

his hand slacked.

after coming back with medical supplies, the two of you were silent as you tended to his wounds. he gazed at the ceiling, the silence occasionally broken by you asking for permission for actions such as unbuttoning his shirt. you don’t comment on the new cryo vision in his pocket.

deep gashes littered his body, most notably a diagonal one across his chest. as you applied pressure against the gaping wound in an effort to stanch the bleeding, kaeya couldn’t help but hiss in pain. “sorry, sorry, i’m trying to be gentle,” you whispered hurried apologies, using one hand to continue applying pressure and the other to hold his hand.

his grip tightened, and the poor boy whispered, “i know, i trust you. or, well, i’m trying to.”

all you could do regarding his eye was wrap it in bandages to get it checked out in the morning. the basic first aid lessons you were required to take to become a knight did not cover an injury like that.

once you finished, you sat on the floor, leaning against the bed frame. he was still holding onto your hand.

"what happened?" you asked softly.

"..."

"was it an ambush?"

"..."

"i'll report it in the mor-"

"don't. please, don't," he whispered. “i swear i’ll explain everything to you one day.”

you grimaced. "fine. just... promise not to do anything stupid like that again, alright? i was worried."

kaeya didn't respond, going over your words in his head. you were worried? you didn't seem worried. but... you were worried. why would you so willingly take care of him like this? how would you react if you knew who he really was? would you still be worried?

he couldn't hold back his tears and restrained sobs. you lifted your head in surprise, leaning in closer to scan his expression.

"...kaeya?"

"my apologies," he tried to smile, covering his face with his free arm in embarrassment. no one has seen him like this before, and it was far too foreign for him. "especially when you let me use your room."

in response, you squeezed his hand, whispering, “it’s fine. i don’t think of you any differently.”

how do you always know exactly what to say? to grant him at least a little bit of privacy, you turn away as he quietly sobbed into his forearm.

after a while, he sniffles, saying, “i apologize. i don’t know what came over me.” trying to get some humor out of the situation, he adds, “well, i guess we are bonded for eternity now, aren’t we?”

you turned your head to face him, the furrow of your brows causing him to chuckle. “archons, you’re going to be the death of me,” you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose.

“seeing how you saved me from death, that wouldn’t be fair, would it?” his foxy grin made you let out yet another exasperated sigh, but you still couldn’t help but smile slightly. it was obvious he was trying to act tough for you, but for now, you would follow along with his fantasy.

“alright, whatever. get some sleep.”

“and what about your sleeping arrangements?”

“i’ll manage. i’ve slept on the forest floor for missions, i can handle a hardwood floor.”

“oh? i couldn’t possibly let my savior sleep in such horrible conditions,” he teased. “won’t you join me in bed?”

“barbatos, give me strength,” you muttered.

he laughs softly, and you can feel your stomach tighten at the sound. even during such a rough moment, kaeya can still manage to put up a charming appearance. his single eye twinkled in the low dim of the candlelight, and you realized your falling for his sly tricks. “please, [name], won’t you grant a poor, injured man his dying wish?”

with a groan, you let go of his hand and climb into the bed beside him, careful not to touch him to avoid any unnecessary pain.

“i knew you were a saint!” he gives you a triumphant smile as you lay on your side to look at him. his tanned skin, though scratched, still was as enchanting as ever in the moonlight. the deep blue of his eye pulled you in deeper, and once again, you realized you were a victim of his charm. but, this was different—though he would never admit it, with your tender care of his wounds and unwavering support, he has unknowingly fell victim to your charm, too. his hand seeks out yours once again, intertwining your fingers.

neither of you commented on the continuation of the hand-holding, nor would you ever.

only then, as you two shared the cramped bed space, does kaeya come to a realization—he had you.

his grip on your hand tightened.

he has you.

[throwaway-yandere]

Apotheosis Upon Your First Feast (Yandere!Wanderer & Pantalone/Reader)

Commissioned by: @leftdestiny-posts/@eternally-frozen (ilysm. Feel free to kill me later lmao)

unreliable synopsis: After being reassigned to Vanarana when your previous coworker became the Acting Grand Sage, with the help of Ararycan, you reunited met a wanderer on an abandoned machine. Unfortunately for someone, your childhood friend "Pantalone" has ears and eyes everywhere. (Avoid this fic if you’re not a fan of dark content. It’s not too dark but your mental health matters!) 

IMPORTANT NOTE: Please use the InteractiveFics extension and change “(Y/n)” to whatever name you want, “[Wanderer]” to his chosen name, and lastly, also change “(wood/salt)” to… whichever option you feel like. It’s a surprise mechanic *wink*. If you're reading this on a phone, just pick between wood or salt right now, keep your choice in mind and commit to it : )

Afterwards, would you be so kind as to answer this fun poll after reading the fic? Danke ♡

“Why doesn't Nara (Y/n) eat what Arasaka prepares for them? Does Nara (Y/n) lack appetite lately?”

“O-Oh, well, that’s…” You paused, looking down at the broth, “in all honesty, your cooking tastes bland…”

“H-Huh?!”

Time had passed since Lesser Lord Kusanali's official ascent to power and now is the fifth month since you first made friends with the Aranaras. Many events took place before you found your pyro vision becoming Arasaka's torch as they cooked– and if any of your coworkers saw you now, they probably wouldn’t identify you as Alhaitham’s (only) friend and Ex-Sage Azar’s lazy employee.

Maybe they would've if you helped Alhaitham and his teammates secure Sumeru’s future.

Sure, your name isn’t listed in the coup d’etat, but that’s only because you wished for the Akademiyan scholars to make the epiphany for themselves. As Azar’s ex-assistant, you laid low from projects as a prerequisite so that the populace may acquire a personality of their own to make the nation truly deserving of the title “Land of Wisdom.” 

Alas, that did not happen.

Alhaitham’s tactics were not wrong, but you felt like his group spoonfed Sumeru citizens with the Fatui’s crimes rather than having their own realizations. It did not feel like growth to you. It felt like the people casually learned from a one-sitting textbook rather than a hands-on experiment when they should’ve personally learned how minacious blind ambitions could be. In turn, he argued that your ideas were barbaric and that scholars revolting was not in the realm of possibility– hence, you did not lend your aid. Perhaps your inaction had pissed him off, but it’s more likely that he finds that sending you to Varanara was ideal for his workload. 

And in some strange domino effect, refraining from helping a coup d’etat meant eating the tasteless food known to man.

Since you were personally assigned a senseless task to patrol and report weather patterns in the area (which is unnecessary and quite frankly boring), you had befriended the infamous aranaras children from Port Ormos hear stories about. 

But the mundanity doesn’t hurt your pride as a graduate scholar. It's been fun so far.

“I'm sorry, 'Saka, it's just that I think your food lacks a bit of salt–"

"ASSISTANT (Y/N), THERE YOU ARE!!!"

Both of you flinched, causing Arasaka to topple over. The sound hurts. You snapped your neck towards the sound. An adventurer– Baharak– stood with both hands wrapped on her bag's shoulder straps with a silly grin on her face.  

… You’re turning the setting of your hearing aids down.

“Baharak, it’s been a while,” you spoke. “Would you mind not yelling whenever you call for me?”

“Oops– Sorry (Y/n)! I mean– sorry, Assistant (Y/n).”

Changing her volume doesn’t undo the pain she inflicted on your ears. Gently, you pushed Arasaka behind an elevated jag of root to cover them. To escape suspicion, you continued to stare at Baharak while feigning sleepiness.

“What are you here for?”

“The Forest Watcher received a letter addressed to you. The sender doesn’t have a name again, it just has the coin-seal thing.”

“Please hand it over.”

“Aight!– I mean, alright.”

After dismissing the loud adventurer and giving her spare mora as thanks, you waited until she was out of sight. Arasaka suddenly rose and jumped onto your lap, equally curious about what was written on the salt-scented parchment. Arasaka's preppy manner soon turned sour as they discovered who the sender was.

It’s a letter from your best friend, "Pantalone".

“Aww…” Arasaka whined. “Arasaka was hoping it was the Verdant Nara instead.”

You tore it open.

 

"My dearest, (Y/n),

If it's not too much to ask, may I trouble you to visit my office in Northland Bank soon? I merely wish to see you. Spending Lantern Rite alone this year was not a pleasant experience. It's just for a mere chat- I'll reimburse your traveling and dining expenses. Care to make it up to me?

Your beloved,

As per tradition, you threw the letter in the fireplace. Pantalone doesn’t like leaving a trail of evidence, naturally, you assumed the same applies here.

It's never a chore to visit a friend. Maybe you'll head there tomorrow–

“Arasaka doesn’t like Nara Pantalone.”

The aranara lowered their head, continuing, “Nara Pantalone reminds Arasaka of the Taste of Sadness.”

Cute. 

Every time Pantalone comes to visit, the aranaras behave like envious little siblings. Ever since you started patrolling Vanarana, the place had become the harbinger’s premiere leisure destination. The woods critters frequently tried to undermine his gifts, but they were adorably ineffective. Even if Pantalone cannot see them, the situation is nonetheless amusing.

If you remember correctly, the Taste of Sadness means salt to aranaras, right?

“Ah, well,” you laughed. “I guess you must be incredibly sensitive to his smell. He took quite a liking to salt-infused perfumes last year.”

“Don’t like perfume.”

“But I am wearing one though… Has the scent been bothering you all this time, Arasaka?”

“No, Arasaka was wrong. Arasaka likes perfume, and Arasaka hates salt. Taste of sadness. The scent of sadness.” 

“Oh, no! If Pantalone’s smell makes my dear Arasaka sad, then maybe we should drown him in Varunastra,” you chuckled darkly, expecting the aranara to react loudly over your out-of-pocket remark.

“Of course. Salt Nara would make for decent spare rations!”

You laughed out loud at Arasaka’s even more out-of-pocket reply. Out-of-pocket is an understatement, that comment straight up sounded out-of-the-CASKET. 

Before standing up, you ruffled Arasaka’s nonexistent hair like you would with your deceased sisters.

“I’ll come back in a few days, okay? In the meantime, why don’t you read a cookbook?”

“Hmph! Nara (Y/n), you’re being mean! Just wait! My sisters will make a dish Nara (Y/n) can’t say “no” to!” 

“It’s a dumb risk.”

“It’s a new business venture, dearest.”

“The market for new eyeglasses isn’t going to rise any time soon.”

“Why are you so adamant on opposing this idea?”

“Stagnation breeds putrefaction, especially in business, does it not?” You raised an eyebrow, preparing for a harangue. 

“Je suis d’accord!” The man spoke softly, accentuating his Fontaine pronunciation somewhat boastfully. Knowing your disability, he never raises his voice to the point of it hurting. “And it is precisely why I want to invest in an eyewear conglomerate in Sumeru.”

“Then why are you dropping your prior investments?!”

“Because it’s the right thing to do.”

You sighed, annoyed.

Pantalone is an amazing businessman, but without your council, he wouldn’t amount to who he is now. Unlike most people, “sneakily ambitious” are not the words you would describe your visionless friend. Such a moniker sounds insulting given his lack of celestial blessings and you know Celestia itself never took kindly towards his well-versed dirty tricks against his opponents.

In your humble opinion, the term “industrious” is a better-suited and less backhanded compliment for him.

You’ve known Pantalone— no— “██████” since childhood. Your history stretched back so much that you no longer recall the circumstances of how you befriended him. He acted as your ears when it came to haggling and normal day-to-day chores. As far as you know, he has always been an older brother to you. In times of extreme poverty, you both prayed and starved together, scraping by using salt rocks as entrees. 

There was no one else that made your deafness bearable except for him. With no family left, he was your only beacon of hope and dear Morax– you’d rather not remind yourself of the time your dead sisters mistakenly ate mud for rice cakes when famine struck.  

You chose Amurta out of the Six Great Schools for a reason:

You can’t afford to watch anyone die of hunger ever again.

When you began living in Sumeru, you had pledged your alliance with the region but never forgot all the toil you had to go through. As a malnourished child, you quickly fell in love with the nation. In Sumeru, healthcare was free– in Liyue? You heard nothing, and you wished that “advantage” doesn’t make you blind from the evil you witnessed in the slums. Poverty ate away your hearing, your family, and your childhood dreams… 

In a way, the only reason you see aranaras in the first place may be that you didn’t have the chance to experience any childlike wonder until you escaped Liyue.

Pantalone scoffed, “whether you agree with my financial decision or not doesn't affect my resolve. Do not press more about this, dearest.”

… But you’re convinced that your closest confidant “██████” had already perished from starvation long ago.

The man before you calls himself “Pantalone” nowadays and you lose all sense of indolence whenever his presence looms. When he watched your last sister perish in your arms, an epiphany gave birth to his cold demeanor towards deities. He found it challenging to worship the Archons who had no need for mora but were eager to take it away from destitute mortals who needed it as you and your sisters did. The death of your younger sibling was his final straw, and in a sense, you also buried your old friend that night. 

Unlike ██████, Pantalone cannot forgive nor trust the Archons for their broken promises. If Lesser Lord Kusanali had abandoned withered forests, Rex Lapis had abandoned those whose blood and tears cannot amount to any mora. You were only allowed to study at the Akademiya after he decided the former was the lesser evil.

Although Pantalone never condemns you for calling him by his birth name, you cannot tell yourself that he and ██████ are fully the same person. There is an unspoken need to straighten your posture and greet him with a semi-scowl to demonstrate your maturity despite him acting cozy and warm. Worse, his lax demeanor never ceases to remind you that despite his uncomfortable reputation, Pantalone is the only companion you’d entrust your soul to even when the world warns you not to deal a contract with the devil.

“You just want to use new brackets every day—”

“I am a businessman, love.”

You speared Pantalone with a pointed look.

“—And why Sumeru? Have you landed a deal with a reputable Amurtan optician? And why didn’t you ask ME first? You weren’t cornered by Dottore or the Tianquan to kickstart an eyeglasses company, were you?”

He scowled, unamused before firing back without skipping a beat. 

“Summer, seven years ago. You accidentally bought six bunraku puppets from Inazuma—”

Your eyes widened. Not this embarrassing anecdote again.

“Woah, woah! Now, why are YOU extorting me?”

“So you’d be silenced quicker.”

“…”

This reticence was slowly exasperating the harbinger, but he never utters a complaint when you're whom he's conversing with. Pantalone cleared his throat with an elegant smile. In that moment of cessation, you figured that he had a seemingly innocent proposal in mind.

“(Y/n), my most dearest baobei…” The harbinger ventured.

“Pantalone…”

He pulled out his desk drawer and ferreted out a parcel that you suspect contains a pair of glasses.

“Would you care to be a test sub—”

“No.”

You have a gut feeling as to where this is going. He’s going to propose that it’s “just” glasses until you find out he’s been using you to track or spy on someone without your knowledge. Classic Pantalone. You won't be duped by that TWICE in a row. If you knew better, you wouldn’t have accidentally leaked intel to the Fatui that Katheryne was being controlled by the Lord of Verdure. All because Pantalone hid a recorder on one of his “gifted” hearing aids...

Listen— just because you refused to lend a hand to the Archon when she was in need and was subsequently confronted by the 2nd harbinger in Sumeru City doesn’t mean you were colluding with these fools. 

You just wanted to remain neutral in any given situation. Unlike your childhood friend, politics bore you to death. And just like the Acting Grand Sage, you’re too lazy to act as a beta tester no matter how minimal the effort the task requires.

“I only ask that you wear this pair of glasses and test its comfortability.”

“I refuse.”

“We can negotiate how much mora you’ll earn—”

“Just stop.”

“Hmm, if I phrase it as a “gift”, would you accept—”

“Hell no.”

Pantalone paused.

“Hmm…” He tapped his desk, gazing at the paperwork neatly piled up.

“Word of advice, (Y/n), it’s highly probable that the price of cocoa will rise next week,” he shrugged. “That fact is, of course, most definitely unrelated to our current discussion.”

Is he… 

Is he threatening to generate chocolate inflation over a pair of glasses?!

You scoffed, eyes wide.

“██████, you worthless SCALPER.“

“The majority prefer to call me a ‘regrator’, but that new nickname is acceptable as long as it is you who makes such mildly unpleasant utterances.”

“GAH! You— YOU—” Even though he may completely ruin your usual routine of buying chocolates after work, it's difficult to curse him out. You have no choice but to spout illogical syllables without a valid clause. “JUST— YOU!!! YOU.”

Smack.

Upon hearing your facepalm resoundingly, he laughed uncontrollably, removing his glasses to wipe his eye with an uneven grin on his face. He tried to keep his composure but he kept snorting. 

You took a peek between your fingers. What a precious noise. You haven’t heard him laugh like this for over three years now.

At that moment, you thought ██████ was alive.

“F-Fine— give me those damn eyeglasses.”

Pantalone drifted the parcel above your palm until he quickly retracted it as soon as you reached forward.

“But before I do that, can you promise me one thing?”

“What is it this time?” You groaned.

“Don’t lend it to anyone else, understand?” Pantalone slightly ruffled your hair. “I had it custom-made for you.”

You rolled your eyes, “that thing is definitely wiretapped. You’re not even bothering to hide it anymore.”

“Oh no, it’s not just that—” 

“Just that?”

He shrugged smugly, which was not a good sign. 

“The eyeglasses function similar to an Akasha Terminal, but of course, the information you’d find there is directly from my database.”

Pantalone opened the box and swiftly put the white-framed glasses on your face. He lightly tapped the frame—

and a control panel window flickered open.

Just like an Akasha.

“H-How on earth—”

“The Doctor and I had a deal. He’ll recreate at least 80% of a regular Akasha’s functions while I help him track down a few… crops. It’s a quid pro quo, I promise. It’s less of him exploiting me and more of me exploiting…— well, that doesn’t matter right now. C’mere, let me see your lovely face...”

Pantalone tilted your chin up with his thumb. His face was inches away from yours, and his piercing lilac eyes observed your glasses and what was behind them, calculating. His breathing was notably strained in a subconscious attempt to make you feel less uncomfortable from the position he trapped you in— ever the perfect gentleman— but you see his entire face flushed in a pinkish hue. A few seconds have passed, and you feel the glove pressed against you twitching. 

Pantalone pulled away, shoulders stiff.

His ears were red.

“I-It’s working as intended.”

If not for the nature of your relationship, you were close enough to kiss– an appealing notion for the harbinger, yet it is not a move he should bring himself to try.

“Y-Yeah, no kidding. That was awkward.”

He gripped his arm, looking at the window.

Pantalone is painfully aware you think of him as an older brother. Or at least, the shadow of one, given how you rarely call him by name anymore.

“My apologies, I simply wanted to take a good look at you.'

He muttered, “you’ve grown into a gorgeous person, (Y/n).”

You didn’t hear him.

“██████– I mean, Pantalone–”

“Go back to calling me ██████, dear.”

“Pantalone.” You put more emphasis on his harbinger name, watching in glee as he rolled his eyes, “I expect to be paid in chocolates and at least two months’ worth of food.”

Indeed, your proposed exchange pleased him. ██████ knows how much you value healthy eating and abhor it greatly when others waste grains of rice. Time and imagination had transformed his early memories as you as a human so close to a skeletal figurine with sunken cheeks and broomstick-like limbs. Those thoughts cause him much sorrow. Pantalone would have pampered you for free if you had only let him– seeing you eating healthy gives him life. Almost like how a father would tell his children that seeing them full is enough to make him full as well. 

Let him spoil you with food. Please.

Seeing you thin makes him feel sad.

“What do you want to eat for dinner later? My treat, as always.”

“Mint salad sounds lovely.”

“Just mint salad?” Pantalone smiled thinly.

His dearest baobei, no longer skin and bones. No longer barely fueled by rice and salt. No longer skipping meals. It warms his heart more than the exclusive springs offered to him because of his mora and title… But it’s not enough. It’s never enough.

“Hmm… Would it be okay to request a plate of Triple-Layered Consommé?” You muttered, gazing at the floor. “I kind of miss your cooking… Just. Just kind of.”

His heart skipped a few beats as he saw your shy expression. 

You straightened up, coughing, “not that your cooking is anything special, it’s just that I don’t want to eat anything too bland and–”

“Of course! Anything for you, my love.”

Pantalone grabbed your hand and placed a soft kiss on your knuckles.

“My baobei, you’d be too full to walk once I’m done spoiling you…”

“D-Did you have to word it so seductively?!”

You blushed once again, which only served to worsen his urge for making you undeniably satiated. 

Oh, how he wants to keep you in a cage, locked up, and fed until he’s satisfied that you’ll never starve again…

Maybe then, you’d let him spoon-feed you like years before...

There's no rest for the wicked. When you returned to Vanarana the next day, the aranaras pulled you in for another chore at Devantaka Mountain.

“Hey, little man, get down there, right now!” 

You screamed with your hands cupped around your mouth to amplify your voice. The aforementioned "small man" scoffed, not shifting an inch from his posture, as the blue aranara crept up behind you.

Ararycan worriedly relayed that a “Wood Nara” had been trespassing the large abandoned Khaenri’ahn machine. The little vegetable-like creature had grown to trust you when it came to scaring off unwanted guests, which usually entailed eremites or treasure hoarders scavenging for scrap metal. 

“Ararycan wants to stop Wood Nara.”

You gently pried the wire off their hand, keeping it in your pocket in a very definite fashion. 

“I know, ‘Rycan, but Naras are stubborn beings.”

“Just like Nara (Y/n)?”

You gasped, eyes widened.

These plant-like beings are surprisingly masterful at the art of roasting.

 “Just like Nara (Y/n), you say?! Rude, Ararycan, rude.”

You laughed humorlessly, masking your jadedness with forced laughter. 

In all honesty, you’re inclined to believe that this job reassignment was Alhaitham’s way of punishing you for remaining neutral. But surprisingly? An Amurta alumnus like you have been enjoying the task and in no small part thanks to these silly little creatures.

It's absurd to imagine that you would consent to be pulled by these vegetable creatures. You initially believed that they were paracosms produced by a lack of stimulation. You once tried to ignore them. Regrettably, that frail facade didn't survive due to a couple of slip-ups. The first to catch you drawing their likenesses next to your weather reports was Arapas. The second was Arabalika, who overheard you whispering about how powerful they were after they defeated a ruin grader, and then Arama who heard you humming their songs. They’ve built up quite the case against you, and you had to fess up before they start giving you a hard time.

By “hard time”, you were referring to how a crowd of tumultuous aranaras huddled up and tugged your hearing aids’ wire with their teeny hands incessantly.

Which was what Ararycan is doing right now.

“Get us up there, Nara (Y/n).” 

"Careful, Rycan– you might damage the wire."

Suddenly, the hatted man's eyes widened after seeing you. Call it intuition, but it seemed like this total stranger knew who you were.

You made an exaggeratedly loud inhaling sound, turning off your hearing aids momentarily.

And then, a scream.

“STOP, STAY WHERE YOU ARE!!! RIGHT!!! NOW!!!”

The difference between stupidity and bravery is measured by outcome, and neither are variables you wish for this “Wood Nara” to test out. Alhaitham would have you write two pages detailing an incident if the stranger broke something and eight more if the machine awakened. And sadly, you are only a small percent less lazy than that man.

Despite your words droning childishly, you made no move to approach him. His eyes sharpened, but you felt no scrutiny— 

This man you’ve never met wore a blatant look of disbelief.

You looked down.

Maybe he could see Ararycan…?

“Hey— can you see them?”

You swiftly swept Ararycan off the ground, who made a surprised yelp. 

The man winced.

"P-Please… Leave the forest alone…"

"And why should I care about your pathetic request?"

"Please, have mercy… T-There are creatures that live in this area… Creatures you cannot see because you lacked a human heart."

“–Ngh!”

Those memories were hard to swallow, like reading an inked sloppy handwriting submerged in water.

“G-Good riddance…”

The man coiled in pain, gripping his scalp with his lithe fingers. You cannot view the expression on his face, nor were you able to verify that he had yelped. The distance between you two was too great to conceive a communication that did not rely on shouting.

“Nara (Y/n), what are you doing?!”

Although your proximity with the aranara doesn’t cause any communication barriers, that didn’t stop Ararycan from yelling.

For some reason, the stranger flinched after seeing you carry what appeared to be air around “normal people”’s vision. Perhaps he found your actions cringe-inducing… or perhaps it made his migraine worse. Then again, both possibilities are not mutually exclusive. However, you have a feeling he didn’t flinch because he saw Ararycan.

The blue aranara leaped off of your hands.

“Ararycan is worried… Ararycan thinks Wood Nara is going to destroy the giant iron mountain…”

You stared up at the man again, wanting to go on for a long rant but refrained after realizing how immature that is. While you do have a hunch that the stranger possessed a vision, you’d bet mora that he is no match for Arabalika’s accumulated Ararakalari. 

“Say, why do you keep calling him Wood Nara? Is it because of his ginormous hat?” You whispered to Ararycan.

“Huh? Did Nara (Y/n) not notice?” They tilted their head.

“Ararycan calls him “Wood Nara” because he’s made of white wood. Ararycan is not sure if he is a real Nara.”

Their answer entered from one ear and exited in the other. You’re used to hearing the Aranara lexicon that you never take any sentence at face value since you’ve learned your lesson back when Arasaka made you scout the market for a “Taste of Happiness.” Thank the Lord of Verdure that it was only Pantalone who laughed at you for describing sugar as “white, cubic, crumbles when crushed, becomes sand, and can be eaten.”

“Hah, well, he better not be made out of wood 'cause I might burn him.”

“Ararycan doesn’t think that’s easy to do. Wood Nara smells like the taste of anger,” once again, you ignored their riddled words.

You clutched the pyro vision dangling in your cloak’s right shoulder, located opposite where Alhaitham places his. Your skill set does not differ from that dendro user’s repertoire, and you calculated what vertice you should drop upon teleporting. Grabbing Ararycan, you rushed forward...

Without making it past the one-minute mark, you leaped effortlessly to where the stranger stood.

“Excuse me, young man, but do you have an Investigation Charter from the Akademiya?”

With an unused voice when it comes to dishing out commands– much less an implied threat– your approach wasn’t even a fraction of what makes authorities like the General Mahamatra intimidating. Yet, you still tried. You crossed your arms and hovered your hand near your claymore.

This stranger gazed up, boasting his soft face and beautiful lilac eyes topped with a complexion quite like a sheltered princess. He had the finest eyes you had ever seen. Yet, even with a heaven-sent face, his eyebrows were knitted. He continued kneeling on the cold metal of the giant mossed and corroded machine. 

One closer look should’ve made you hyper-aware that his joints were not bound by mortal flesh, but your heart was more entranced by his glassy pupils. 

“We meet again. If that’s not a sign, I don’t know what is.” 

He muttered inaudibly, hence, you did not hear him. Since you also just came back from visiting Liyue and their post-festival fireworks, you’ve turned your hearing aid settings lower than usual. You bent your knees slightly, offering a hand.

“Nana korobi ya oki,” you said. The stranger looked like he hailed from Inazuma, so you thought you’d put your knowledge to good use. “It means–”

Unbeknownst to you, you uttered the same thing in a past long forgotten.

“I know: fall down seven times, get up eight.”

His gloved hand grasped your own, and you tried not to think about how soft yet firm it was as you pulled him up. You grunted slightly from the shifted weight while he didn’t breathe at all.

“No, I don’t have any clearance permit,” he said. “And I still don't have a heart, if that still matters to you.”

You raised an eyebrow.

‘Still’? What the hell is he talking about? Aaru village is miles away from here, but is it possible that the man you’re talking to is a mad scholar? That’s concerning. 

Pushing your glasses farther up the bridge of your nose, you tried to search his face in Sumeru's records– which might be more unlawful than whatever this man's doing, but who's policing you anyways?

…

Nothing.

There's not a single official record on this man.

Not even in the Fatui's database.

Almost like the man in front of you doesn't exist.

"What the hell are you wearing?" The man sneered. "Since when did you have awful eyesight too?"

“No Investigation Charter, no clearance, just what do you think you’re doing here?” You digressed. “May I at least have your name?”

The man tilted his hat up, “and why should I stupidly give my information away?”

Your eye twitched. He kinda reminds you of Arabalika. Maybe if you gave him a cane he’ll calm down a bit.

“I do have a use for your name, awkward stranger.”

“And that is?”

Writing a report to the Acting Grand Sage regarding suspicious individuals.

“Something to call you,” you shrugged with a child-like candor, renewing your request with bold obstinacy. “I’d rather not recount this tale to various parties as That One Time An Awful Little Man Tried To Pry Open A Giant Machine And Failed.”

He exhaled curtly.

… Was that a laugh?

“How childish. Even if you don't know my name, your "friends"– assuming you have some– will remember me by that stupid description.”

“I mean, it's a memorable first impression,” you met his gaze smugly. “But why are you hiding your name, hmm? Suspicious.”

“It’s called respecting one’s privacy. Something you don't understand.”

How rude of him to make assumptions about you, “are you some covert government official?”

“No.”

“Then what? Are you some inhuman being?”

“...” He didn’t say a word.

Something tells you that the answer is close to your hunch.

“[Wanderer].”

He muttered, once again, you did not hear it so he spoke louder.

“That's my name. Don't you dare make me repeat it.”

“[Wanderer]…”

You missed the way he tipped his hat, hiding an uncontrollable smile from your view.

[Wanderer]... That does sound like a fitting name. It reminded you of a character from a franchise or mythological tale you thoroughly enjoyed as a teenager. It might be rude to share that information, though. You’re not certain how this bratty person would react upon hearing that his name might as well be the name of your lotus from a botany class.

Normally, [Wanderer] would snap a “speak up– is there something wrong with my name?” upon listening to hushed whispers or a resounding silence after his many introductions. But you’re different for a reason. 

There was no way in hell he would take the traveler's suggestion over a name you had given him.

Ararycan tugged your pants.

“Hey, don’t just stare at him, Nara (Y/n)! Tell him to leave!!!” Araycan trashed around. “Nara (Y/n) must be a brave Nara if you like the taste of anger.”

[Wanderer] is the taste of anger? Is that what Ararycan was trying to say?

You blushed, fake-coughing behind your hand.

You wouldn’t say he reminds you of the taste of anger– especially with that winsome face. If anything, his appearance looks a lot like the bunraku dolls you accidentally bought years ago.

“Well, [Wanderer], it’s nice to finally put a name to a face,” you said. “But this is a dangerous area. What are you doing here…?”

“I just wanted to look for traces of the Doctor,” [Wanderer] crossed his arms. “Unfortunately, I can’t pry this stupid machine open.”

“The Doctor? Who’s that?”

“The Harbinger who sits at the second–”

“Aah, The Outcast. I see–” you shook your head. “Wait, no, I don’t get it. What does he have anything to do with this machine here? This is a Khaenriah’n creation.” 

“I know, I’m not dumb like you. I'm here because The Doctor had plans for these automatons, that’s why I’m here.”

“But even so, it’s not advisable to wander these parts alone. You ought to have asked for a travel companion. Who knows if you run into a hoard of vanaagnis in marana?”

“Hmph. Do you think I can’t handle a few whooperflowers in a withering zone? The audacity.”

“Arrogance is the capital stock of misfortune– wait, how’d you know Vanaagnis is a term for whooperflowers?” You blinked expressively. “And the meaning of marana too– so you ARE a mad scholar.”

“I’m NOT,” [Wanderer] glared. You noticed how he seemed unimpressed when you mentioned that proverb about arrogance and “capital stock”, and his expression soured more when you accused him of being a lunatic. 

“I just… I just learned from the best.”

[Wanderer]'s stare not wavering away from you.

Your silence did not go unnoticed by the other two.

“...Why do I have a feeling you’re trying to say that you’ve learned from me?” Those words had escaped from your mouth before you could stop them.

[Wanderer]’s eyes widened.

“Can… Can you remember?”

“Remember…?”

He frowned, eyes reflecting his disappointment.

“No, no, it’s probably just a fluke,” [Wanderer] frowned with a finger tracing his lips. “Maybe my expression just gave it away…”

“Nara (Y/n)!!! Tell Wood Nara to leeaaaaveee!!!”

You tried not to flinch at Ararycan’s whining. They don’t seem to understand that having poor hearing doesn’t mean you can’t register their commands.

[Wanderer] walked past you. 

“Fine, I’ll leave this device alone, but on one condition.”

“What makes you think you’re the one in control–”

“Go out with me.”

“...”

“...”

“... What?”

Your eyeglasses flickered red.

But that red light was gone in a blink, you weren't even sure if it existed.

You laughed nervously, “sorry, I don’t think I heard you correctly–”

He refused to meet your eyes like a coward.

[Wanderer] replied brusquely, “look– you're partially deaf, but you’re NOT stupid. You heard what I said, so own it.”

"Hold on– where is all this coming from, [Wanderer]?" You pivoted your heel but were too late to yank his sleeve. 

He already hovered a few feet away from you.

"I'll come to visit this place more often," [Wanderer] smirked. "You’ll still be here at the upcoming Festival, right? Mark your calendar. That’s our date.”

“Hey, you can’t just!– Aaand he’s gone.”

Despite his abrupt parting, you couldn’t help but smile over such a cheeky encounter, completely forgetting how that man rummaged through the giant machine you’re standing on without a permit.

Something tells you that you’d see him more often.

And you did.

“[Wanderer]” never failed to visit you at 10 AM sharp every day, until there was only one day left till the next Sumeru Festival. At first, you thought his eccentric personality would make the following days unbearable, but he was rather civil– just sharp-tongued. 

He would show up whenever you wandered in the forest to disseminate knowledge about the local flora and Sumeru's history. Some of them you already knew, while others had you wondering if he knew the Lord of Verdure. While you were trying to interview him for a report, not as a trespasser but as an assistant, you once purposely lightened the atmosphere to get honest responses from him. When you jokingly asked who he was, his reply was unsatisfactory.

“Who I am is not carved in wood nor stone. ᏕᎧᎷᏋᎧᏁᏋ wise told me that it’s a flexible concept and it’s easier to understand through a story, but even then, you’d only see a fraction of who that person is,” [Wanderer] peered dotingly. “If you wish to know who I am, then work for it. I’m not giving you a damn summary.”

Tomorrow is your first "date" with the man and you barely knew him.

Your internalized frustration made him think you’re insatiably adorable. 

How the tables have turned. 

After all, [Wanderer] only responded with the same answer you had given him before.

In a forgotten history, ᎩᎧᏬ were the one that spouts spontaneous philosophical questions that led him into fits of unintelligible musings. [Wanderer] berated humanity for being sentimental creatures yet look at him now, proudly boasting the name ᎩᎧᏬ gave him wherever he went. It is by no means grander than a title like God of Everlasting Eternity or other such monikers, but when Godhood has stripped away from him, that name provided more solace than a seat in Celestia.

“The Puppet”, “Kunikuzushi”– such utterances are water under the bridge. Only [Wanderer] stays afloat, like a bubble on water. Maybe a bubble is only beautiful for a moment, yet that moment weighs more than a meaningless “eternity” and he knows this well…

[Wanderer] had been played by fate. Attaining freedom, independence, and a vision did not absolve what chokehold you had on his synthetic being. 

You're a colorful character, averaging about five meaningful papers per year– all the while considering yourself a "retired" genius. [Wanderer] would've been a kinder and forgiving person if you were his young and impressionable self's creator. He envied your patients, your strange collection of bunraku dolls, and the tenderness you reserve for them. 

He missed you, no matter how often you both fought. Your hums used to enchant him when you lull him asleep with aranara songs, but they now haunt him up at night. You were his puppet and he was your dictator until you had grown exhausted of foreign power enough that you abandoned your neutrality and revolted. 

But you did not revolt against him in this revision. Without a doubt, his revised “past” still mirrored the pain he caused, but through other means. He can’t say he had no regrets when he tampered with the Irminsul. Niwa’s death had less weight in this world, and for the wanderer, death without sanctification for a significant purpose is unnecessary homicide. And instead of helping Azar’s experiment, you became a “disobedient pet” who saw no need to collaborate with his superiority complex.

Yet, despite being such a disobedient pet– in his opinion, that’s a grave understatement–, he can’t help but cherish you.

The puppet missed the way his delusion marked your body. Fingerprint-like blotches collared your neck before, but when the slate was wiped clean, so too did his inflicted bruises. He missed the way you begged him to stop the pain. He missed the way you defended invisible creatures as “Queen Aranyani’s successor.” He missed the way you begged to keep the forest safe.

He missed the way you begged to be his.

But those marks are long gone– the symbol he carved on the nape of your neck had disappeared. You no longer had anything that resembled signs of his ownership.

Not only that, but seeing you wear eyeglasses– something you haven't before– fills him with anger.

The one saving grace from this situation was when this timeline confirmed that you wouldn’t help Azar if it wasn’t for [Wanderer]. You were interested in his personality and disposition as a puppet longing for a human heart, not just any of Dottore’s run-of-the-mill creations. That observation surely boosted his ego. 

Your opinions mattered to him most in that project. Admittedly, he craved everyone’s veneration, even when they lacked true understanding.

But you were the first mortal that made him appreciate his defects…

 

"Is it so bad to live this way?" You combed his hair with your fingers. "Must you try your hand with such heresy?"

"Know your place," Scaramouche gritted his teeth. "You're nothing more than my maintenance worker- you do not deserve an audience."

"Be that as it may, future faux-god, can't you entertain me for just a moment? If I wasn't worried about you, I wouldn't be helping you with this damn treacherous experiment.

You ignored how he snarled at such a nickname, "it pains me to watch you lust for more power when you already boast an acceptable form. What is it that makes you so desperate? Is it because you can't hide the ball joints that connect your fingers and limbs?"

You continued while adjusting the tightness of his skeletal wrists.

"Is it so bad to live on as a defective being? Does imperfection invalidate a life's purpose? I only ask out of curiosity. I have imperfect ears, so does that make my life devoid of meaning?"

Scaramouche frowned, "do not compare your ears to my heart or lack thereof."

He didn't understand why his voice cracked. Scaramouche did not feel his usual temperament sizzling over but something heavy resided in his chest.

"Sorry."

"Don't apologize, I know you're not sorry," Scaramouche cupped your cheek, sporting an uncharacteristically loving smile.

"And your unapologetic behavior is what makes you my first sage."

His first sage…

[Wanderer] laughed to himself.

His first sage would know that if he gained a heart, he would've seen the aranara you were talking to earlier.

But this is fine. He can start over again. 

This time, he’ll make you love him normally.

Heaven, please help the white wood that fell in love for it will never be human…

…

Out of the blue, Scaramouche spun and hurled three consecutive wind blades toward the woods with precision.

Be that as it may, the walking salt is surely more pathetic.

The “trees” grunted, but [Wanderer] did not miss the smell of salt-infused perfumes.

What a shame. 

The next Sumeru Festival, your “date”, is tomorrow, yet there will always be those who lurk in the shadows to see the mighty fall. 

"Pantalone…" 

The ex-sixth harbinger snarled with unfathomable familiarity. Which was the complete opposite of the ninth harbinger, who coldly greeted him like a new enemy. 

"Good afternoon, [Wanderer]."

Pantalone pulled out a gun from his hidden holster.

"No hard feelings, sir," the businessman smiled thinly. "I am but a simple man eliminating a love rival. You see, it’s not nice threatening to steal someone’s possession."

Scaramouche cackled.

How annoying. He never liked this friend of yours– he much preferred the one that planned a coup. Pantalone was not a coworker Scaramouche liked, much less a rival. This ambitious man was always a parasite, pretending to be worried while threatening to withhold project funding behind your back. Scaramouche will never forget how he boasted insolently that he had known you longer as if eternity wouldn't be enough to make up for it.

"You never change, mortal," he laughed even harder. "I knew something was off about (Y/n)'s glasses!"

"Hmm? Is that so?" Pantalone pushed them up closer– reminding Scaramouche that he’s no terrible shot. "How strange. In any case, I quite frankly don't care what you know or do not know."

He pulled the trigger as Scaramouche stomped his feet.

Only a few knew what occurred in Vanarana that day, but there was one thing the forest remembered.

Before either of them parted, a loud bang echoed that even deaf trees can't miss.

You woke up from Araja’s house (which was the only comfortable place to sleep in Vanarana) after passing out from tumultuous loads of paperwork sent directly by the Baharak. She joked that at that point, maybe she had become a bad omen for you– and you confirmed her suspicions. The tasks the Acting Grand Sage laid out for you were taxing, if not, deleterious for your mental well-being, and worst of all–

He sent a notice that this would be your last week patrolling Vanarana.

When you spread the announcement, the aranaras were saddened by the news. Even Arabalika was unimpressed and asked if you can prolong your services. Alas, it can’t be refuted.

Noticing how tired you appeared, the village chief immediately commanded you to sleep while you pretended not to hear whispers of a surprise farewell party. Considering how the place looked positively empty this morning, you’d wager that they’re busy working on it.

But you do smell that someone’s cooking right now…

The enticing scent emanated from a large pot. As you sauntered closer, you noticed how Arasaka was tending to the food. The aranara gave you a friendly wave that you didn’t reciprocate. It’s rather chilly in Vanarana in the mornings– and the sleeves of your jacket were comfy. 

“Good morning, Nara (Y/n)!”

“Good morning, ‘Saka. That smells delicious,” you smiled bittersweetly.

“Hehe, really? Glad to hear it! One of Nara (Y/n)’s friends helped gather the ingredients. That Nara was good at hunting down prey!”

One of your friends…? You haven't introduced a lot of people to the aranaras. That can only mean it's either Baharak, Pantalone, or [Wanderer], and you can safely remove the first one since they're positively busy with guild matters. 

... Huh. But those two can't see aranaras. Does that mean they stole Pantalone or [Wanderer]'s game?

"Pfft..." You chortled. Yeah, imagining either of them getting confused as to why their hunted boar had gone missing feels like a sight to see.

You took the ladle from Arasaka’s hand and sipped the warm liquid.

…

“Oh, hey, this tastes pretty good!”

“Hehe, Arasaka is glad to hear you liked it! Nara taste buds are hard to please.”

You took another sip as Arasaka watched. The warm soup went down smoothly, but the aftertaste had a serpent-like bite to it. It tastes akin to red sorghums Pantalone would down whenever social drinking was inevitable. Your only critique was that it would’ve been a refreshing experience if there wasn’t a rocky object stuck between your teeth. You awkwardly picked it out.

… And saw a small hint of (wood/salt) between your fingers.

You stared at Arasaka.

Strange…

Something feels… off. 

This doesn't taste like happiness, it tastes like…

You shivered and yet the aranaras around you still had that same painted smile. 

 "Does Nara (Y/n) like the taste now? The taste of friendship?”

… Friendship?

No. That can’t be it.

The spoon splashed back into the bowl. You didn’t say a word, only stared at the boiling pot. You knelt, grabbing both handles to gaze upon the bubbling red liquid. With trembling hands, you picked the spoon back up and swirled the contents. Nothing was of note–

Until you scooped something from the very bottom and found thick strands of dark hair.

A very familiar strand of dark hair.

You adjusted your glasses in an attempt to find out where this human hair came from–

“Nara (Y/n) likes the scent of (wood/salt) Nara so my sisters added him in!” Arasaka innocently cheered.

Your heart dropped.

You turned pale– gagging.

No. It can't be.

Did you just eat…

“So, Nara (Y/n)– does our cooking taste bland now?”

… “him”?

“Oh, Nara (Y/n)’s friend is approaching! Don’t forget to thank him for the food!”

[charliemwrites]

price and feral have me SCREAMING bc why is he such a dad and he's so stern and she's so scared it actually kills me. (ik im genuinely harassing u with asks but i cannot stop i am obsessed)

Ok but like hear me out- Ghost is away and something scares feral MORE than price like maybe there's a storm or a power outage or someone (animal, human up to u ) is in the backyard near her little sunroom and she's scared of price but so so so much more scared of something else :( price would be so surprised the skittish girl is anywhere close to him let alone pretty much on his lap. shes to prideful to straight beg for comfort but she gets pretty close

Lmao hi, aurora! You’re not harassing me and I like answering asks!! Especially this one it is 👌

It’s just been a bad day. Your nerves are wrecked. This is only the second time Price has babysat you, you’ve been watching spooky things all day (which you know you shouldn’t do without Simon around, but you had a craving for scary content) and now it is storming like crazy. You’ve been holed up in your room where you usually feel safest, but every crash of thunder sounds like it’s right over the house. It’s so loud that you can’t even hear Price around the house and you could almost believe you’re alone here.

The final straw is when the power goes out. Silent with fear, you scramble out of bed. You know this house, every inch of it, but in your panic you bump into two walls with a little yip of surprise and pain.

You stumble to the guest room and shove the door open, don’t even bother with knocking or being polite. It’s too dark to even see price.

“You alright, stray? Is something wrong.”

You whimper and dive onto the bed, filled with the single-minded goal of getting to him because he may be scary, but he’s meant to keep you safe. You find his reaching arm and cling on, let him drag you the rest of the way into his big, warm chest.

“What’s wrong, little one? Bad dream or something?”

You shrug, too busy getting as close as you can. His heartbeat is slow and steady where your arm presses against him. You tuck in and try to follow along with his breath. He hums low and soothing as he curls his arms slowly around you, chin on your head.

“You’re alright, I’m here. Not gonna let anything get you,” he says.

You swallow and nod. Wiggle in a little closer. He sweeps his palm up and down your back.

“You can stay here tonight, I don’t mind,” he assures. “And in the morning I’ll make cinnamon rolls, how does that sound?”

“Okay,” you mumble, settling in. “Thank you…”

He makes a pleased noise that you feel more than hear. “Of course, stray.”

[angel-eyes05]

What's In A Name

pairing: roronoa zoro x fem!reader

summary: as a master thief, you pride yourself on never getting caught. that is until you're caught by the straw hats as you try stealing from their ship. unable to turn you in to the authorities just yet, they'll have to make due with storing you on the going merry in the meantime. but, your time in confinement has allowed you to get particularly close to a certain swordsman. how close the two of you get is to be decided though.

warnings/info: nsfw mdni, oral sex (fem receiving), alcohol consumption, drunk/tipsy sex, face riding, my own sex headcanons for zoro are VERY clear here lmao ,takes place in between jaya and skypiea (please pretend theres more time at sea in between those arcs cause this will not work otherwise OK THANKS), this is for the pre-time skip zoro girlies (he's 19 pre-time skip dont come for me), no use of y/n, the first half of this is just cute shenanigans between reader and the straw hats. its a lot of character building stuff but i like it.

word count: 6.3k

notes: HI GUYS IM BACK IVE MADE MY RETURN I FOUND SOMETHING TO WRITE ABOUT!!!! and its the longest fic ive ever written too god damn what a comeback lmao. ok so i started watching one piece and im head over heels in love with this man...but i'm only up to water 7 rn so i only know how to properly write for pre-time skip zoro so thats how this is gonna go. i was looking for zoro/one piece fics to read but theyre literally all established relationship ones which aren't my cup of tea so im doing it myself lmao. also i didnt proofread i got too lazy sorry if some stuff doesnt make sense sorry sorry sorry but im a simple lazy tired girlie lmao enjoy!!

dividers by: @cafekitsune

You didn’t know any of their names.

You had been aboard the Going Merry for about three weeks now, and you still hadn’t learned anyone’s names. Granted, your reason for being there wasn’t to make friends anyway. That wasn’t particularly easy to do, being tied up in some storage closet and all. 

Being one of the few residents who actually lived on Jaya had allowed you to pick up a skill or two when it came to stealing. Pirates with big bounties and even bigger treasures left their ships unattended at the docks, leaving you with some perfect quick heists from time to time. Some steals were easier than others. As much as you believed in your talents, most of the time your ability to get out unscathed was based purely on the luck of the draw. It wasn’t an easy life, many recent nights leaving you with more injuries than berries and gold pieces, but it was all you knew having lived here for so long. 

After having taken a break from heists for a bit, you finally laid your eyes on a ship worth stealing from. A pirate ship with a goat out in front and seemingly orange trees next to the helm. Most of the ships at the dock had been there for a while, leaving the pirates on board used to your tricks already. Being low on cash was another factor. So, after a bit of planning, you made your way onto the ship.

Earlier, you had found that one of the windows to a cabin had been left open, so you decided to make your entrance through there. You gathered your things and dove into the crystal blue water by the dock. Once you made it to the back of the ship, you took your rope, with your own handmade grappling hook at the end, and swung it to hook on the window sill. Luckily for you, it stuck the landing on the first try. You smirked to yourself and used the hook as leverage to climb up onto the ship. Unfortunately, this seemed to be the ship’s bathroom. Not super ideal. You’d have to venture more out into the ship. But with this came the risk of getting caught. Given your dire circumstances though, it was a risk you were willing to take.

With an attempt to make as little creak as possible, you slightly opened the door into the rest of the interior. Coast was clear so far. Suddenly, a shake rattled throughout the interior. You tumbled onto the floor, pushing open a door due to your unbalance. What the fuck was that, you thought to yourself. It quickly became no matter though, when you noticed the door had opened up to a room with a treasure chest tucked away in the back. Jackpot. You slyly made your way into the room and shut the door behind you. 

The room was neatly kept, with bookshelves, a couch, two sleeping hammocks, and a desk with navigation tools on it. There was even a bar. Though temptation pursued at you, you had to stay on task. While making your way over to the chest, you heard different creaks vibrating across the walls of the ship. You prayed to yourself that it was just the wood’s reaction to the waves. As you had predicted, the chest was locked, so you searched your bag for anything that could key the lock. 

Time became of the essence quickly as the thuds and creaks on the ship grew louder and louder. Finally, the lock to the chest made a perfect click, as the chest unlocked. You lifted the roof of the chest to find a sight for sore eyes: jewels and gold galore. This was it, you were set. You were so in awe with the vision before you, that you had failed to notice the woman standing behind you. The image you saw in one of the emeralds was a tall figure, with jet-black hair just below her shoulders, and dazzling blue eyes. “Looking for something?” the woman questioned, almost sarcastically. You seemed to have forgotten rule number one of thieving. Remember to lock the door behind you.

Quick on your feet, you whip around to throw a punch in her face, but her reflexes seem to be quicker than yours by the way she catches your fist. You then attempt to kick out her legs. The image you see next shakes you to your core. A hand, seeming to appear out of thin air, attaches itself to your calf. The hand then slowly raises your fear-frozen body into the air, dangling you upside down like a party toy. You attempt to throw more hits at her, all seeming to be in vain though. You kick and scream, like a child throwing a tantrum, in an attempt to get out. The woman looks out into the hallway and signals over another one of her companions. Fuck, this is turning sour fast. Before you can make out any other features of the man, besides his cartoonishly long nose, he uses his slingshot to pelt a rock towards your forehead. Your vision goes black as the rest of the pirates rush into the room.

The rough fibers of the rope tying your wrists together were the first thing you felt as you woke up. This was quickly followed by the underlying nausea from the waves rocking the boat, reminding you why you preferred to stay on land. You attempted to stand up, but your dizziness and the rope tying you to the floor weren’t letting you get very far. Suddenly, the door to whatever room you were in swung open, and the group of 7 pirates living on board entered the room. You slinked yourself along the back wall, attempting to disappear into your skin. You weren’t sure what felt worse: The fear of what they were going to do to you, or the embarrassment that you had been doing this for so long and still got caught.

Nope, definitely the embarrassment.

The man, no boy was a better word to describe him, standing in the middle of them attempted to speak to you before a woman with short orange hair cut him off. “If you think we’re gonna let you get off easily just because we’re also pirates, you’d be sorely mistaken!” she spoke, fiery anger lacing her words. The tall woman from earlier put her hand on her shoulder, calming her down, and walked out towards you. You tried to scoot away as much as you could as she crouched down to your level. 

“Listen, we want this to be over as much as you do. We would love nothing more than to get you off our ship and drop you off at the nearest island. But unfortunately for us, that would mean having to find a group of marines to hand you over to, who we aren’t the best of friends with right now. And we can’t drop you back off at Jaya since we’re too far by this point. So, for now, we’ll just have to keep you tied down here if that works out with you.” You began to speak before the woman cut you off. “You don’t have much of a choice in the matter by the way.”

She stood back up and began to exit the room, the other pirates following her except for two. The boy with the straw hat and another man, with striking green hair and three swords lying in a holster on his belt. The boy looked somberly at you as if he was against this whole idea. But the green-haired one just stared at you. As uncomfortable as it made you feel, you couldn’t help staring back into his piercingly soft eyes. “Come on, let’s go,” the green-haired man said to the boy, finally breaking eye contact and turning his back to leave. The boy followed him shortly after. As he closed the door, you had nothing left to focus on except for the itchiness of the rope, the empty stuffiness surrounding the storage room, and your worsening seasickness.

The following weeks had the same routine. Each of the pirates on board took individual shifts watching you during the day when they were just out at sea. The strange reindeer creature would watch you when they were out on islands. The first shift was taken by the tall black-haired woman. She would come in at the break of dawn to make sure you didn’t find some way to escape at night. You two would sit in silence for a little more than two hours, asking and answering some questions before switching spots with the blonde one. His company was strange, with him hitting on you at random points in your conversations, but he always brought you breakfast in the morning. As much as he made you uncomfortable sometimes, you couldn’t deny that his cooking was the best you’d had in years. He’d even let you take a hit off his cigarettes if you ever asked, so his visits had its perks. 

The next shift was taken by the orange-haired one. The first thing she would always do when walking into the room was ask you how creepy the blonde one was. The answer varied on the day. Once she warmed up to you, she would bring you tangerines from the trees out on the deck. As the days passed, she eventually explained that the treasure you attempted to steal belonged to her, which you begrudgingly apologized for. On some level, you felt bad. These seemed to be small-time pirates, just trying to get by like you were. The more you learned about each of them, the worse you felt about your actions towards them. 

Around lunchtime, the long-nosed one would bring you your meal, cooked again by the blonde man. This member would go into detail about his next invention he was working on in his workshop. You admired his passion and energy towards his craft. His rants and rambles were normally interrupted by the reindeer creature coming in for his shift, causing intense, yet entertaining, arguments to break out between the two of them. The reindeer was the sweetest of all the crew members, always checking in on your health and helping you with your seasickness. He would talk about his home and his experiences there. You developed a pity for the creature. His presence was calming, and you felt as if you could let your guard down around him. That would change as soon as the straw hat boy would come bouncing into the room, scaring both you and the animal. You would soon come to learn the energetic boy was the captain of the ship, which shocked you. But you soon came to understand why. His crew had a massive respect for him, even if he was the root of half their problems.

Being on the ship, you got extremely close to all the pirates. Even the tall woman from before seemed to respect you in some way. You enjoyed all of their company. There was something strange about them though. One morning early in your stay on the ship, you could’ve sworn you’d heard the tall woman say something to the rest of the crew. 

“Whatever you do, don’t tell her your name. Your name is your biggest secret.”

You didn’t know any of their names. You had thought you heard some of them speak it to each other in passing conversations, but not enough to remember who was who. You had bonded with them, but if someone put a gun to your head and told you to name your prison guard pirates, you’d be dead in seconds.

Except for one.

Zoro seemed to be his name. He would come in for the last shift. His presence didn’t frighten you, but it slightly intimidated you. His habit of carrying his swords everywhere he went wasn’t helping. He was silent his entire shift, normally dosing off halfway through after spending around an hour sharpening his swords You didn’t even attempt to make conversation with him. You found out his name when the captain would yell for him to get back to his sleeping quarters. “Zoro! Your shift’s done, you can sleep for real now!” he shouted across the hall the first time it happened. Zoro almost bounced up from his sleep and gave you one look before bolting out of the room to catch up to the captain. You could hear the echoes of their bickering from down the hall as you giggled to yourself. At least he didn’t seem to always be that stern.

It seemed crazy to you. His name was the only one you knew, yet you knew the least about him. He had hardly said 5 sentences to you in the three weeks you had been on the boat. His stoicism was one of the things that drew you into him though. Something about his demeanor, how intensely he would sharpen his swords, how his worries seemed to melt away the minute he escaped into a slumber, and how alive he seemed when he was with his crew. It was enticing. You wanted to know more. You attempted asking him questions about himself, but the most you would get were one to two-word answers. The most you got from him was when your seasickness finally got to you, causing you to puke up the dinner the blonde one made for you. “Woah, are you okay?” he asked concernedly, shooting up from his seat. When your only response was a cough and more puke, he ran out of the room to go get the reindeer. One thing he failed to do was close the door behind him. 

You speculated your options. You had no idea where you were. You could be out in the middle of the ocean. Or you could be right about to dock at land. If you managed to scrape yourself about the ever-loosening rope and sneak out, you’d be free. You’d never have to worry about these pirates again. 

At this point though, did you want to?

You took too long to decide, the reindeer rushing into the room with his medical kit, the blonde one short behind him. As the reindeer gave you a dose of medicine and cleaned up your mess and the blonde one held your hand and consoled you, your attention stayed by the doorframe. Zoro leaned against the wood, watching the work from afar. What shocked you most of all was his face. For a man who seemed so disinterested in you and your existence, his brows were furrowed, his cheeks had a light pink stain on them, and a slight frown invaded his face. He was concerned. Maybe even a little nervous. But why? He’d never shown any sort of emotion towards you before other than sleepiness. Once the reindeer and the blonde one left, he continued with his shift. You noticed something though. He sat closer to you than he normally did. 

You couldn’t tell, but you were blushing the rest of his shift.

Once he left, you sat in silence, thoughts racing through your mind, until you finally fell asleep.

You noticed a change in his behavior in the next few days. When you would ask him a question, he would respond now. And with more than just a “yes” or “no” too. He had more energy around you and wouldn’t spend his whole shift asleep. He would even let out a chuckle now and then. You didn’t know what you had done differently to get him like this, but you liked him like this. He was sweeter than he let on. 

Something had changed in you too though. On the occasions, you would catch yourself looking over his appearance. The more you observed, the more you realized how handsome he was. His clear, warm skin, his hypnotic eyes, his striking hair. You caught his appearance giving you butterflies when he would walk into your storage room. Your heart skipping a beat when he would give you even the smallest smile. You would stare even more when he would nap during his shift. Noticing certain things. The way his breath would hitch sometimes. How he always slept with his mouth open and would wake himself up sometimes with his dry mouth coughs. How his chest rose and fell with his soft breaths. How fighting with a sword in his mouth probably made his tongue stronger than other men you’ve met. You felt weird about it sometimes. Almost like some freakish stalker. But you would feel better about yourself whenever you would catch him staring at you out of the corner of your eye. 

As time went on, the crew began to give you some more freedom. The tall woman began leaving some of her archeology books in the storage room to keep you entertained. The orange-haired one would show you all her marked-up maps. The long-nosed one would even let you out of the rope to test his inventions from time to time. With the door locked of course. And then, the big display came. One day, during everyone’s shift, they told you their names. The blonde one was Sanji. The orange-haired one was Nami. The reindeer was Chopper. The long-nosed one was Usopp. Their captain was Luffy. And the tall woman, who initiated your imprisonment, was Robin. It was a small gesture, but it meant the world to you. With each passing shift, you grew more excited for the next. To learn the next pirate’s name, and with that, their story. Until the last shift of the day came. And you realized.

You already knew his name.

“My name’s Zoro,” he said quietly. “I know,” you replied, bluntly. 

Something felt different about this shift. You didn’t feel the same excitement you normally felt when seeing him. Without your connection to him before, his being the only name you knew, something about him just didn’t excite you as much. Now he noticed your behavior change. “You okay?” he inquired. “Mhm,” you responded in monotony. The rest of his time there was spent in silence. 

You felt bad about what you were doing. This wasn’t his fault. Yet you were acting like this. It was almost as if the two of you swapped places. He was now the one trying to dig information out of you. And you gave him nothing more than blank faces and empty words. You wished you could figure out why you were acting like this, but you had no clue.

Today though, the crew was going to take an extra step towards including you. Throughout your time on the Going Merry, you had only left your little storage room prison a few times. To go to the bathroom and visit the kitchen on special occasions. But you hadn’t seen the sun in weeks. After proving to the crew you had changed, they planned a little surprise for you.

Robin woke you up earlier than usual. “Is everything ok?” you asked, still half asleep. Robin just smiled at you. “Come on, get up.” You looked at her confused, as she walked over to your restraints, untying you from the hook keeping the rope down. She took you by your restraints and walked you out to the room. The mix of drowsiness and confusion left you slightly panicked as you realized she was walking you out to the deck. She opened the door to a still-dark morning. 

The rest of the Straw Hats were sitting out on the deck, just conversing and eating an extra early breakfast, courtesy of Sanji. They all turned to you once you and Robin walked out. “What’s going on,” you asked, still very confused. “On Thursdays, we all like to get up early and sit out and watch the sunrise. And we were talking about it, and we felt like you should join us this time,” Nami smiled. She stood up and pranced over to you, mouth slightly agape and speechless, and took you over to sit in between her and Zoro. You turned to Zoro, overwhelmed with emotions. 

It had been so long since you felt a part of a community of people. You never exactly fit in with the ruthless bands of pirates coming and going on Jaya. Finally feeling connected to people, especially after you wronged them so horribly, brought you happiness you hadn’t felt in ages. 

A singular “I-” was all you could manage to get out, a tear trickling down your cheek. “Just enjoy it. They’ll be at each other’s throats again in a minute,” he joked, getting a soft laugh out of you. He smiled gently, brushing the tear off your cheek. His finger lingered there longer than expected. You blushed. The butterflies were back and you caught yourself staring again.

“What’s that supposed to mean!” Nami interrupted. “Well, it’s true!” Zoro retorted, leaning over you to yell at Nami. The two began arguing as you noticed the sun starting to peak out over the horizon. “Shut up you two, you’re gonna make her miss it!” Usopp and Luffy yelled. They stopped bickering once they also noticed the sky begin to turn orange. 

The pinks and oranges mixed together in a beautiful watercolor painting as the sun reflected its image on the ocean. The soft waves bobbed the ship up and down in a calming hypnotic motion, almost putting you back to sleep. The beauty of it all was so serene. Against popular opinion, you always preferred sunrises to sunsets. The representation of a new day beginning. It gave you hope in your most dire situations. 

You lifted your head back to see the colors slowly spreading to the rest of the sky. Everyone to your right was in the same headspace you were like they were in some sort of trance. They were all cuddling against each other, Robin holding Chopper in her lap, Luffy and Usopp mimicking each other’s smiles, and Nami resting her head on Sanji’s shoulder. They all seemed so close to each other. Like a little family. Connected. You turned to Zoro to see if he was doing the same as the others, but all you found was his eyes softly gazing into yours, and his hand slowly inching towards yours. The minute he snapped out of it, he sharply turned his head and hand away and cleared his throat. You couldn't help but laugh at his schoolboy behavior. With your ego controlling your actions, you took his hand and slowly intertwined his fingers with yours. You could see a smile float onto his face out of the corner of your eye. You did the same.

The rest of the day was spent out on the deck. The feeling of the sun on your skin for the first time in weeks was euphoric. All you wanted to do was soak it all in. The Straw Hats must have been in a good mood today, because, with some extra convincing, you got them to finally take off your shackles. You spent most of the day sunbathing out on the deck with Nami. She had let you borrow one of your bikinis. You two were slightly different sizes though, so the suit was a little tight on you. You didn’t mind very much. You were just happy to be out of the same clothes you had worn for 3 weeks. Sanji didn’t mind either, ogling both you and Nami and basically worshipping the two of you. “It’s ok, he’ll get over it in a few hours,” Nami consoled. You circled the deck a few times to see if Zoro was anywhere in sight, but you couldn’t seem to find him. He probably went inside to nap away from the heat. Part of you wanted him to get the rest he deserved. The other really wanted him to see you in your outfit. 

The day really took a turn when Usopp brought out the liquor from the kitchen. “I was saving that asshole!” Sanji yelled. “Oh come on, this is a special occasion!” Usopp pleaded. With some more convincing, Sanji finally gave in. You and the crew got increasingly drunk throughout the evening, Zoro eventually coming out from wherever he was napping to join the party. You all had even decided to jump into the ocean and swim around for a little bit. All except for Chopper, very sober and very nervous for any incoming sea monsters. He had managed to get you all back onto the ship with some very convincing pleading.

You and Zoro caught each other catching glimpses of one another throughout the rest of the day. Zoro admiring your figure in the swimsuit, and you ogling at the way his damp shirt hugged at his muscles. One by one, as day grew into night, crew members began to pass out on the deck, deciding to sleep outside for the night. You and the other members who wanted to go back into the cabin, Zoro and Robin, made your way back down into the ship. “Make sure you tie her back up. No hard feelings but we can’t be too careful.” Even slightly tipsy, she was still her stern old self. “Yeah whatever whatever, goodnight to you too,” Zoro drunkenly pushed off. You giggled and blushed as he took your hand and led you down the stairs into the cabin. Robin sighed to herself as she watched the two of you scamper off.

You felt your heartbeat get increasingly faster as he led you to your room. For some reason, the air in the hallway got thicker as you got closer. You blamed it on your tipsiness. But your heart slowly sank as you got to the door, realizing you had to say goodbye to Zoro for the day. He opened the door and stumbled into your room, leading you in behind him. He closed the door behind him, hesitating for a moment before going to wrap the rope back around your wrists. 

He seems distressed for some reason, breathing heavily and avoiding eye contact. You look down at your hands, as he so gently maneuvers the rope around them. The butterflies begin to well up in your stomach again, the alcohol fueling their ferocity. His hands. So calloused yet so gentle. You can smell the remnants of sake exuding from Zoro’s heavy breaths. You looked back up at him. Were you two always standing this close together? You the butterflies keep rising and rising. You don’t know what to do with yourself. You’re not sure if you should run, kiss him, punch him, but you have to do something before you implode. Until. He stops.

The rope undoes itself in his hands as he freezes. His hands are shaking, his breath is heavy, and his eyes avoid yours like the plague. You were just getting antsy but Zoro seemed in distress. “Hey?” you ask, lowering your hands and dropping the rope to the floor. “Zoro?” You take your hand under his chin and lift his eyes to yours. You might throw up at any second. His eyes are so softly intense. 

He brushed his thumb against your cheek, sending chills down your spine. You both want the same thing. Both of you are just too scared to take the chance. “It’s ok. You’re okay,” you reassure him, placing your hand over his heart. His heart, which happens to be underneath his bare chest, him having taken off his wet shirt earlier. His breathing slows, and his eyes move down ever so smoothly from your eyes to your plump lips. You catch yourself doing the same to him, and you inching closer to him. “You’re fine.” Closer. “We’re gonna be…fine.” Your lips barely brush each other. The gentleness of the kiss is calming though, as you notice Zoro’s breath slowing. 

You brush again. And again. And again. Lips touching a little more with each meet. Until they fully interlock. The two of you melt into each other as Zoro wanders your back into a wall for support. Your kisses are structured, made to get the most out of each meeting. You’re both ravenous for each other, but you know if you go at each other like mad dogs, you won’t get what you want. So you both take your time getting to know the feeling of the other person’s mouth. You slip a moan out as Zoro’s tongue seeps between your lips. His kisses get slightly more sloppy as he runs his hands down your body. He feels the underneath of your breasts, the curves of your waist and hips, and finds a nice resting place under your ass. Your hands roam his cheeks and jaw, making their way to tug slightly on his moss-colored hair. 

“Needed this,” Zoro whispers in between kisses. “Needed you so badly. But I didn’t know how.” He separates his lips from yours and plants kisses and hickeys along your jaw and neck. “I was always just too nervous for some reason. You make me so nervous.” His hands find their way into your bikini bottom and fondle your asscheeks, getting a low moan out of you. The alcohol must’ve given him a confidence boost. “Good to see you found your footing now,” you whisper in his ear. He chuckles, the butterflies speeding up in your stomach. 

The two of you stay here for a little bit. Hell, you could stay like this for hours. Just soaking each other in. Feeling his warmth brought a fire into your soul. You could tell Zoro was getting a little antsy though, one of his hands moving from your back to your front, beginning to slowly circle your clit. The other hand went to your bikini, untying the back and letting it fall to the floor as his mouth moved to your breast. Waves of pleasure crashed through your body as you let him do his work. “God, you sure this is your first time?” you moaned out. He removed his mouth from your nipple to talk. “Never said it was, sweetheart. You just assumed it.” “Well from the loner vibe you got going on mixed with being on this ship 24/7, you can’t blame me for thinking that.” “Well the loner vibe worked on you, so who’s to say it hasn’t worked on others?” he smirked. You laughed to yourself as he got down on his knees.

Zoro slipped off your bikini bottom, completing the set on the floor. He kissed your v-line with the same softness he treated your lips to. He sat back on his knees for a moment to catch his breath, looking up at you, as if to ask for permission. You held your hand out to his cheek and rubbed it with your thumb. His eyes closed as he placed his hand over yours, as if you would ever take it away from him. God now this was a sight you could get used to. He was so infatuated with you it made your heart ache. He was right here at your disposal, yet you wanted more of him. So you bent down and gave him a sloppy forehead kiss. Once you were back up, he decided to go in. 

Like most things he does, he started slow and controlled. He kissed and sucked on your inner thighs. Once his hand finally left your clit, you knew he was ready. He kissed your cunt, using his tongue to lick up your wetness. You could pass out right now if you had less self-control. Whimpers and moans left your lips, your hips naturally starting to grind against his nose, relieving the ache in your clit. You let him know what felt good by the tugs and yanks you put in his hair. He was a natural. Your guess about his tongue earlier was right too. “You taste so good, just as I imagined,” Zoro breathed onto your lips. You could tell he was starting to lose his composure with the way he continued to bury his face into your pussy. Your cunt naturally tightened around his tongue as he tasted you. Your hips began to buck into his face as your grinding pace increased, the butterflies turning into a white heat you felt getting stronger and stronger. Your bud was becoming more swollen by the second. Your grip on his hair tightened to make up for your failing knees. 

You wouldn’t be able to take much more. Zoro wouldn’t either, his hand making its way into his pants to relieve his own bulge. His pace got faster to match your grinds. The smack of your lips against his tongue, mixed with both of your moans, was pornographically loud. Suddenly, the situation of Robin or another crew member hearing became an apparent one to you. That worry quickly left your mind once one of Zoro’s hands made its way to fondle your nipple. If he asked you to follow him anywhere right now, you might just do it if it meant this every other night. You felt he knew your body better than you did. “So pretty. So good for me. You make this so easy,” Zoro groaned between licks. “Zoro god fuck me please!” Your final whimper sent you over the edge as you wailed and came all over his perfect face. He licked up your juices as he finished his own job as well. Your knees finally gave out as you fell on top of him, into his arms.

He brought you down gently, straddling you on his lap as you wrapped your arms around him. He traced his cum soaked hand across your back and kissed your nape. You were more exhausted than expected, almost passing out in the crook of his neck. Even now, he was so gentle with you. “You did so good, darling,” he praised, kissing your earlobe. “Want…more…want you…inside me,” you managed to get out. He just laughed and pushed you up to look at you. “If you took me right now, I don’t think you’d wake up tomorrow morning. Look at you, you can barely keep your eyes open, sweetheart,” he teased. You pouted. “Oh, you feel that proud of yourself?” your drunkenness fueling your frustration. “No no no, sweetheart,” he chuckled. Once your frown didn’t change, he stopped laughing and pressed a kiss deep into your forehead. “I’m sorry. What I meant was, if I fucked you with everything I have left right now, which is the only way I would want to do it, this floor would leave us with sore backs for weeks.” You stayed frowning. “I want to fuck you right, the way you deserve. And I can’t do it for you right now.” You pouted more at him. He smiled up at you and leaned in closer to your ear. “If you trust me, I promise I’ll make it worth your while. You’ll be walking funny for weeks.” God, you almost came again just now. You didn’t notice how much your jaw dropped until Zoro laughed at you. You couldn’t help but laugh back in tune with his infectious laughter. 

He kissed you with a fever behind his lips, then scanned the room around the two of you. “What’s wrong?” you drowsily asked. The exhaustion from you coming, the sleepiness brought by the alcohol, and how late it was getting was starting to overpower you. Zoro didn’t respond. He just grabbed your swimsuit and helped you put it back on, tightened your legs around his hips, and hoisted you up as he stood. You decided to ask questions once you had a clearer idea of what was happening. He opened the door and walked with you down the hallway, passing the girl’s quarters and into the men’s room. He checked inside quickly before bringing you in and signaling you to bring your legs down. You confusedly followed him to his bed as he groaned, rubbed his back, and sat down on the edge of the bunk. “Wanna explain to me what you’re doing?” you asked, slightly more awake. “If you think I’m just gonna leave you to sleep alone, tied up, on that dirty floor after what we just did, then you must think I’m a really shitty guy,” Zoro quipped before getting under the covers and trying to pull you down. You put some resistance towards him though. 

“B-but Zoro, I’m not supposed to be in here.”

“I know.”

“If someone catches me in here we’re both fucked.”

“They won’t catch you.”

“How do you know that?”

“I’ll wake up before Robin starts her shift.”

“Are you sure, I mean I just don’t kn-.”

“Hey.”

You stop your nervous rabbling and look at him as he sits back up. “Do you want to go back and sleep on the cold, dirty, hard floor?” You really didn’t. “No.” “Then stay here with me.” “But what if-.” “Do you trust me?”

You sure hope you did after all of that. His kind eyes reassured you in the darkness surrounding the two of you. You took a deep breath and nodded. “Do you trust me?” he asked again. “I trust you, Zoro,” you confirmed. He smiled kindly at you. “You’re fine. We’re gonna be fine.” He steadied you by placing his hands on your hips, running his hands along your waist, and pressing his lips into your tummy. You loved the way he looked at you. Like you were his whole world. It was comforting.

He took your hand and helped you into bed. You bundled yourself under the covers and wrapped yourself around his frame. He kissed your temples one more time before slipping into sleep, his light snores hypnotizing you into a slumber of your own.

The last thing you remember before dozing off was the feeling of his hands on your waist.

Everything you wanted was right here. In front of you. Straight out of a dream. Your only fear was that it would be gone once you woke up.

a/n: THIS TOOK FOREVER GOOD LORD. anyways thanks for being here for my comeback era lol. my upload schedule is NOT going to be consistent this is just a little splurge i wanted to write lol. thank you for reading i really appreciate it (i also really appreciate engagement lol please like repost comment etc im greedy). i love one piece and i love zoro. once i meet law expect all hell to break loose im gonna write so much fanfiction about him its concerning hes so fine im so excited. anyways lol thanks love you bye.

[miasmaghoul]

Nun forced fem on either SwissDew or Raindrop

yeah sure here

(idk what this is its barely nsfw lmao uhhh warnings for forcedfem, religious fuckery, mention of safewords without use of them, mostly implied corruption kink)

"It suits you."

"Does it?" Rain smooths nervous hands over the front of his habit, flattening imaginary wrinkles. "It feels so..."

"Pious?"

Rain gives a hum - it's not the word he had in mind, but it isn't wrong. Rain adjusts his veil as he takes in his reflection, turning to take in every angle in his floor length mirror.

It's odd how bare he feels considering how little skin he can see. His face and hands stand out beautifully, pale and sharp against rich black wool. That's all the uniform reveals, though. Nothing about this ensemble could be called flattering, and yet Rain can't stop looking. Can't stop tracing the shape of his sleeves and frowning at the one stubborn curl poking out behind his ear. The rosary hanging from his belt clinks when he moves to tuck it away, silver and red beads glinting in the firelight.

"I was going to say severe," Rain murmurs, fingering the inverted silver cross hanging around his neck. "But...I suppose that works too."

He feels the need to speak softly like this, to keep his voice low and his words gentle. He isn't a particularly loud ghoul as it is, at least not often, but something about seeing himself look so...reserved demands it.

Rain licks his lips, and finds the sight of it in the mirror to be borderline obscene.

"And how does it make you feel?"

The words are followed by the creak of a chair and steady footsteps on hardwood, a confident but easy stride, and Rain's heart skips against his ribs. The footsteps stop beside him, in what should be his periphery, but their owner remains hidden by the starched edge of Rain's wimple. He can't make himself turn to look, occupied instead by watching splotches of pink bloom on his cheeks.

"I...I don't know," he admits, and it's the truth. There's an odd stew of feelings swirling around in his skull, a bizarre blend of shame, discomfort and the most blasphemous sort of pride. His fingers tremble as he tugs at the knot binding his belt, a mindless distraction.

"Take your time," flows into his ear, velvety smooth, "but I want an answer."

Rain nods, sighing as he lets his eyes slip shut. Just for a moment. Maybe two.

He really didn't think this would be so hard. He knew it would be different - how could it not be? - but the heaviness in his gut is so much more than he was prepared for. He's been dressed up a thousand ways from Sunday; lingerie, pretty dresses, elegant gowns and the sluttiest costumes Swiss could get his greedy hands on. He's worn makeup and press-ons, learned to walk in the highest heels and had his waist cinched by corsets until he was ready to faint.

It all pales in comparison to the simple garments he wears now.

"...small, I think," Rain practically whispers, once the words find his tongue. It's the closest thing he can think of to describe the tightness in his chest. "It's like..." Rain wrings his hands together, the motion obscured by his oversized sleeves. "It's like I don't belong in this."

"That's because you don't," comes his very amused reply, and a gentle weight settles against his forearm. Rain stares at that elegant hand in the mirror, wide eyes caught on the place skin turns to fitted sleeve. "That's part of the fun," that hand thightens, a rough thumb arching over the inside of his wrist, and that voice feels like a red hot poker when it adds, "Sister."

The word makes him gasp, makes his stomach flip, and Rain wobbles in place. Has to reach out to catch himself on the body beside him, and he earns a soft chuckle in response.

"Easy, easy."

Rain feels the words as much as he hears them, radiating through the palm he's planted in the center of a lightly muscled chest. He shivers when a warm hand rubs over his spine, a familiar motion that has completely different connotations right now.

"You're safe," he's promised, quiet and serious. "I've got you."

Rain nods, takes a deep breath as he pushes himself upright, but he can't make himself open his eyes. He knows what's waiting for him when he does, and some part of him doesn't want to see it. If he sees it, it's real. A fantasy made real - not his own, but one he's been eager to help fulfill for ages now. Ever since the night he wrung this desire out of the ghoul supporting him, had pulled the words from his throat with precise rolls of his hips and a perfectly placed hand on a long throat.

"I've got you," he's assured again, and it's so genuine that Rain can't hold back his whimper.

"Sorry," he huffs, shaking his head. "It's...it's a lot."

A hum answers him, a warm palm cups his cheek, and Rain leans into it easily. Soothed by familiar skin and spiced cologne that settles flayed nerves.

"Rain," he says, and it's so gentle that he almost cracks an eye open. Almost. "We don't have to do this. You know that."

He does. Of course he does. One word and he's out, done, able strip himself of fabric that feels far heavier than it truly is. It would be easy, and there's a first time for everything. The word sits on the tip of his tongue, just behind sharp teeth.

"I know," Rain breathes instead, finally straightening up and crossing his arms over his stomach, "I know."

The hand on his spine remains, grounding, and Rain focuses on the feel of it. Breathes in through his nose and out through his mouth until the tangled mess in his belly unravels, until the pressure in his head subsides. Until he can face the body beside him and brace himself for what he's about to see. One hand fiddles with his rosary, nervous energy poured into a silent prayer he says at every midnight mass.

He can do this.

He can do this.

When Rain opens his eyes, it's as devastating as he thought it would be.

"Oh," he sighs, hot from his scalp to the soles of his feet, and the soft smile it earns him makes Rain's chest hurt.

He doesn't know where to look, too many details for his already frazzled brain to absorb; the shiny tips of polished loafers, a perfectly fitted black cassock, a blood red stole embroidered with goat heads and a sharp collar. Rain's eyes stick there, glued to that simple white square, and every inch of him tingles in a way he can't explain.

"Satanas," he says without really meaning to, and Rain is immediately rewarded with the warmest chuckle.

"Blessed be," Dew replies, and Rain feels more of the tension drain from his shoulders. He tears his eyes from that little white square with great effort and finds the other ghoul's face lined with mirth. His copper eyes sparkle in the glow of the fire, and something about it makes Rain shiver.

"I'm sorry," he repeats, taking in every inch of that handsome face. Dew's pulled his hair back, tied it into a tight knot at the base of his skull, and all it does is make him look more authoritative. "I didn't -"

"Stop," Dew orders, one palm raised, and Rain has never fallen silent so quickly. That one little moment makes something familiar start to bloom at the back of his mind, and suddenly it's just a little easier to deal with the invisible weight on his shoulders. His eyelids feel just a little heavier.

"Sorry," Rain mumbles once more, but it's only out of habit. Dew ignores it, tips his head, and then that warm palm is back on his cheek and Rain has a fleeting thought about what his habit will look like once he's inevitably tenting it.

"Tell me you want this," Dew says, voice even. He strokes Rain's cheekbone with the tip of his thumb, and Rain wishes he would push it between his lips instead. "Tell me you want it," he says again, fingertips tracing the edge of his coif, "or we'll change and -"

"No," Rain interjects, more sudden than even he expects, grabbing at Dew's outstretched arm. The cassock feels so soft, somehow plush and warm against his fingers. "No, I - I do," Rain promises, too flustered to keep his voice from shaking, "for you, I - I want to -"

He's silenced by the pressure of one long finger against his parted lips, by a soft shushing noise, and then Dew's close enough that Rain can feel his warmth. He tilts his head up, gives Rain a hungry look, and Rain can't describe how miniscule it makes him feel.

"You'll tell me if that changes?"

"Yes," Rain promises, breathless, and he nods so urgently it nearly dislodges his wimple. "Yes, I promise."

As soon as the words escape him, as soon as Dew nods his acknowledgement, Rain swears he feels the air shift. That warm hand leaves his face as Dew backs away two steps, head held high. Rain feels unbearably cold in his absence, but he knows Dew will have him hotter than he can handle soon enough.

"Look at yourself," he instructs, nodding towards the mirror. "Tell me what you see."

Rain turns on autopilot. Swivels on his heels until he's facing himself once more, all harsh lines and dark fabric. He straightens his cross, his veil, and wonders how much redder his cheeks will be by the end of this.

"I see..." Rain licks his lips again, but he can't watch it this time. "I see...purity," he supplies at length, the word syrupy thick on his tongue. "I...I see innocence."

Rain wonders if Dew will make him look at himself like this afterwards too. Once he's been used up and drained dry, left woozy and weak and with nothing in him to argue. The thought makes him queasy as much as it makes him throb, and Rain stares at the spot on his habit that he knows his cock is starting swell behind.

"Do you?"

Footsteps again, intentional. Slow. Stalking up behind him, teasing fingers trailing along the edge of his veil just enough to feel. Dew appears in the mirror beside him, and the sight of the two of them together makes Rain's knees weak.

He's starting to get why Dew wanted this.

"Yes," Rain huffs, nodding once. There's a tingle caught in his spine, between his shoulder blades, a shudder he can't quite shake out.

"Yes what?" Dew asks.

"Yes, Father," he replies, a swift exhale, and Dew looks so very pleased at the way he sways.

"Well I've heard otherwise, dear Sister," he lilts, and then he's moving. Stalking slow circles around Rain a fox ready to tear into a particularly fat hen. "In fact," he adds, coming to a stop right in front of Rain. Reaching out to slip two fingers under his chin. Lifting his gaze so all he can see is Dew's neutral expression, wild eyes and that fucking collar. "There's a rumor going around that you're a regular Jezebel." Rain winces, and Dew gives him a falsely sympathetic smile. "A common whore masquerading as a lost little lamb in need of guidance."

"N-no," Rain whispers, giving his head the tiniest shake. "I - I promise, Father," he manages, already starting to get a little fuzzy around the edges. "I'm - I'm pure, I'm -"

Dew shushes him, and then he's gone. Floating away on sure feet and gliding back to his chair. Rain watches the way his cassock billows around his legs, catches glimpses of tight-fitted black slacks beneath it, and when Dew snaps his fingers Rain follows with silent obedience.

Dew looks positively regal in the oversized armchair he's pulled in front of the fireplace. He sits with his back straight and both hands folded on his lap. Rain doesn't think he's ever seen him look so powerful, so commanding of attention, not even on stage.

"Kneel, Sister," Dew commands. "Kneel and confess your sins." He tips his head and Rain's breath catches in his throat. "Kneel," he says, "and let me decide if you deserve forgiveness."

Rain drops so hard the floor shakes.

[ashlynniis-bracketeers]

E.G.OBLAST {Antonblast/PMoon}

Merry Crisis, have some crossover silliness.

So me (and a few other people I know that are into both PMoon and Antonblast) have been trying to make Antonblast character/Abno E.G.O pairings... because Funny™. I've drawn other E.G.O pairings, but I don't think they're up to the same quality as the ones I'm posting here, so I'll probably redraw those lmao.

I'll put those older ones under the cut, though. Easier to do "indirect" things like that on Tumblr lmao.

This will be a lot of text, so I'll put all of my explanations under a cut. Big ol' thing.

I hope you like it!

Cut time.

Annie: I drew the Annie one today in Krita.

She's an obnoxious hellion (affectionate) at the best of times, only going on the Kick-Satan's-Ass Adventure for the sake of causing carnage, so I felt that Singing Machine for all of its annoyingness (Can't have too low of one stat... but also can't have too high of another! Fuck off) and tendency to cause chaos would fit her. Meat Lantern could probably also fit. Not sure what Limbus Abno/E.G.O could fit her, though...

Decided to give Annie both versions of the Harmony E.G.O weapon (Bazooka from LobCorp, grinder guitar from Ruina), with Ruina's suit (because SM doesn't have a suit in LobCorp) and LobCorp's gift. She deserves both weapons, it'd let her do maximum chaos. Meanwhile, her Corroded form is basically just the Singing Machine itself with eyes, legs, her morningstar in its mouth, and a silly hat. Basically an exited dog made of buzzsaws lmao.

The text reads: How about we made some REAL noise? (Awakening) - Louder, LOUDER! Better, make it better, make it LOUDER, LOUDER, LOUDER!!! (Corrosion)

Satan: I drew this one (and Freako's) in MS Paint lmao.

For his LobCorp/Ruina E.G.O, I decided to give him Sanguine Desire. As for the explanation, well... have you seen the Red Shoes' quotes in Library of Ruina + Corroded Sanguine Desire Rodion's quote? All for a more vivid, luscious shade of red. Honestly, his ass is not Awakening if he gets his hands on that E.G.O, he's Corroding immediately lmao.

I actually do have a Limbus E.G.O in mind for him: Blind Obsession (Dream-Devouring Siltcurrent). His obsession with becoming the Reddest of the Red is all-consuming and does nothing but leave him miserable, as does the DDSC's desire to sink into the dark depths as to "shine brighter than anything in that dark place". I also think that the guy that desperately wants to be red getting a very blue E.G.O (which is also Pride-affinity, also blue) is rather funny lmao.

I don't know what kind of hooved legs he has, so I based his skeletal leg in his Corroded form off of horses.

I didn't write any quotes for it, but I managed to figure some out in Discord chats: C'mon, now. Just a little cut here..." (Awakening) - Red, red, RED! RED, RED, RED, REDDER, REDDER, EVER MORE RED! GIVE IT TO ME, ALL OF IT! (Corrosion)

Freako Dragon: Also drawn in MS Paint.

Dragon with a body made of pachinko balls, and his associated sin is Greed... but Greed isn't a Sin Affinity in Limbus, seemingly absorbed into Gluttony. I felt that Effervescent Corrosion would fit, replacing the pachinko balls with pearls.

For the Corroded form, I put multiple pearls in the clam mouth to look like his body curled up inside it, like a dragon protecting its hoard. I colored the join-circles with the same colors as his eyes when he's charging in his fight.

I'm not really sure what LobCorp/Ruina E.G.O would for him... Old Faith and Promise, the literal gambling-mechanic Abno, doesn't have its own E.G.O rofl.

The text reads: Hah! Sticky. Stuck in your head, huh? (Awakening) - Come here! Come and try to claim my riches! (Corrosion)

Also, here's the other pics

Hex Nail Brulo (because... er, "attachment issues").

Blind Obsession Satan (see above, under Sanguine Desire)

Pleasure Anton (substance abuse themes + red + UR HEAD ASPLODE)

[death-in-a-handbasket]

One thing that bothers me about some ranpo fans is that they woobify him. Like, the mans kinda neurodivergent coded, and people tend to act like hes "baby" for those traits

my brother in christ, that is an adult man! He struggles with some things but that doesn't mean he wouldnt go to a sex shop or have kinks or whatever

YES SO TRUE 🙏

gonna go on a bit of a rant here because I have a great many feelings on this and honestly anon if you wanna dm me to go on a discussion spree I’d be all for it >:)

okay see, I get what they mean when they point out how immature and energetic he is, but at the same time every character has stupid and strong parts to them in different ways. Take even someone as serious as Fukuzawa, who tries offering fish to ever cat there is, or perhaps Dazai, who is one of the most complex characters in bsd, and yet is always knee deep in a prank of some kind

Ranpo is an immature shit but that’s because he wants to be as a sort of reclaiming of a childhood he was deprived of and because it makes things easier to be happy-go-lucky, but he’s still an adult and perfectly capable of acting like one, so seeing people baby him completely without acknowledging the fact that he’s seen dead bodies in all sorts of states and has knowledge on pretty much everyone’s personal beef at a glance, well it’s kind of a letdown from a fandom that has such pride in analyzing its characters. if y’all wanna be so smart as to make comparisons between Dazai, his irl counterpart, and the books he wrote, you can do the exact same with Ranpo and read all about eroguro (and the rabbit hole known as pink films I found on the side while researching)

innocent and baby. yeah sure LMAO

this isn’t to say they’re wrong for making him goofy, I just wish he was known as a whole and not just for certain parts, like have we forgotten he’s on par in intelligence with Dazai 😭 cmon now guys

I could spend all day sitting down and talking about the intricacies of his character and any bsd character for that matter, and as someone who is legit diagnosed autistic also with a baby face, just because someone is neurodivergent and silly in the face doesn’t stop them from from being absolutely vile on the down low, me and the majority of my friends are walking examples of this, and let me tell you the server convos get WILD

[threepoint14art]

HELLOOOO for pride month i wanted to share our headcanons for fnafhs!!!!! coupled with some edits with our designs!!

Under the cut there's individual commentary about all of em!

Freddys afab, and only goes by he/him with the animatronics. He didnt tell them he's male or anything. What happeend was they they were all talking to eachothet, getting to know eachother, when chica realized she forgot to ask his name. Meanwhile freddy had though he heard Fred, so he wss on his own little world and asked to the air ‘Fred?’ so they took that as his name and he hasnt ‘corrected them’. (This is my (loop’s) work around for those twins basicallly having the same name.) Hes called Freddy and not Fred bc Chica gives them all nicknanes , Freddy, Foxy, Goldy, instead of Fred, Fox, and Golden. ( Bonnie… you bastard you already fit…. cannot change his name to Bon without nuking Bons actual name). He hasn't thought about his sexuality because he thinks he's undatable, Dysphoria levels are very high, hes contantly ‘out of it’ in his own body. feels like hes just, piloting it, distant from himself and the now. whenever he does come back doen it feels awful fir a bilion reasons 👍 this makes it hard for him to identify the feelings he has about himself since its all so fuzzy and distant. hes not thinking about his sexuality, he doesn’t think anyone would really date him so, fuck if he knows! Bonnie is cis demironantic and unlabled. Goes by he/him. One of his names is María (Bonnie María) so that plus his longer hair means he gets misgendered as a CIS guy and I think its rlly funny. He's not thinking about romance because "no one would go out with him", enter Bon with a nuke Chica is cis and Bisexual. Goes by She/her. Her bisexual awakening was magnet hatsune miku lmao Fox is afab trans guy, stealth about it, and bisexual. Goes by he/him. He figured out he was trans PRETTY early on so no one but his family really even knows, he practically has no dysphoria. Golden is amab nonbinary and pan (they/them). Being famous is the worst thing ever you could do to them, people know their dead name and sorta treat them as a gay man rather than someone nonbinary and it's really bad!!! Sort of wishes they fell into some binary so something about them would "change" and so that people would realize they have changed, there is no way to "pass" as nonbinary and it drives them a lil crazy Fred has not been born (sorry low blow), but if they were they'd be amab, nonbinary and bisexual. Still figuring stuff out but eventually he will settle for going by He/they Meg is afab, genderfluid and pan, goes by any pronouns, idek what else to say <3 Bon is afab trans guy and gay, goes by he/him. He and Malva (usagi) are twins and just switched names and lives and gender! so he's stealth to everyone EXCEPT his sister, this includes their father! who is awful!! and this makes him super repressed and ill about being gay, yeah. Both he and Malva lied on legal documents to look cis since they exchanged identities and all that joy is amab trans girl and bisexual, goes by she/her, also famous so people also know her deadname </3

Toddy is afab and cis, she's NOT aware of either of her flags, comphet queen, "dating" bon because it helps them both feel so normal but its not working out and it never will! Seeing the nigthmares all date eachother made her think "oh wow not being monogamous is a thing" and if she thinks of malva and joy thats HER BUSINESS and her business only. Also fun fact her parents are divorced not because they hate eachother but because they realized they were both aroace, epic. Goes by she/her Deuz is amab bigender gay and poly, the nightmares are a polycule. She is not that dysphoric most of the time and goes by He/she Maggie is afab trans guy, bi and poly, Femenine trans guys are epic and he is one, gets misgendered a lot because he doesn't bind and wears makeup and croptops and all that. Goes by he/him and she/her ONLY with his partners. Onnie is amab agender, gay and poly, it used to be forced to have really short hair because it's dad is awful (also bon's dad, yay siblings), so when he ran away he grew it out a lot, goes be he/they/it Onyx (oxy) is afab trans guy, bi and poly, he got kicked out when he came out as trans, he's super happy now tho. He/him Pup(pet) afab demi-boy, his legal name is puppilo i know it sounds dumb thats why they go by pup. He's queer in some way but its impossible to find out given how he experiences feelings and all that (lore tm) so, fuck if i know. Goes by he/they Mai afab demi-girl and sapphic, yay for twins, her legal name is marinette but they go by mai only, she really wants to date but due to how she and pup operate thats kinda impossible and shes super hung up on it. Goes by They/she Lily is afab cis aroace!!! Eak is afab trans guy and gay, he does not really pass that well so he's misgendered quite a bit at school. Goes by he/him Tony is amab cis guy and gay, he's dating Eak, he used to question if he was REALLY gay before eak came out and was super confused about it and then he found out hes a guy and all is well lol Cami is afab aromantic bisexual and nonbinary, though she has not thought about the whole nonbinary thing that deeply at all. Eventually she will use all pronouns but currently she goes by She/her Loon is amab bigender bisexual and poly, is super dysphoric and hates dressing too femenine because it "doesn't fit her", "not cute enough to be a girl and not handsome enough to be a guy", goes by loon when masc and jj when fem. Goes by he/she Malva is trans and lesbian! Unlike Bon she's normal about being lesbian, mostly because their dad thinks she "doesn't look like one" and because generally girls just get an easier pass to be mushy and close to eachother (eugh), goes by she/her Owynn is afab trans guy, demiromantic, ace and poly. Damn share some flags dude you are hogging them. Stealth at school but percieved as a femenine guy and therefore called gay (as an insult) a lot, lied in legal documents to be seen as a guy! he's dysphoric despite passing really well because of very minor things people don't really notice, female scorpions are taller than male ones and he's tall, female scorpions have bigger hands than male ones and his hands are big, etc etc. He goes by he/him Background character jumpscare! Mesero who is named Vincent here, Owynn's older brother who is amab cis pan and poly, he thought he was straight for a LONG while and hated people calling him gay as an insult because he had long hair, sorry to burst your bubble but you are not straight, he eventually became normal about it but it did hurt that people were "right about him" Spring!!! Is amab cis unlabeled and poly, he never thought about labels or anything for the longest time because he thought he was undatable and also was busy with ten trillion jobs, fly low, goes by he/him Bg character again! Novia (ghghg) who is named Leticia here! She is afab cis straight and poly!

Also sorry for not having any of the funtimes, we haven't really thought about them aside from lily, so we have nothing ToT. Any funtime lovers please share what you think about them we really need it

[mildlyannoyedscoundrel-blog]

Fan Fic Writer Interview

I’ve wanted to do this ever since I saw it on @hollow-lime-green’s blog but I have my phone set up so that I can only be on social media for 5 minutes at a time and it is hard to do something like this 5 minutes at a time so I’ll probably be chipping away at it for another couple of months lol

How many works do you have on AO3?

17! But I think there’s one that I orphaned when I myself was 17 so I guess technically 18.

Your top 5 stories by kudos:

1) Fuckery - JJK, Satosugu, 14.3K which is insane now that I look at it, Rated E

This fic is the bane of my existence istg (lh). I wrote it on a dare from my irl friends, slapped it out in like a month and a half and it became my most popular fic by far within less than a week. Sex sells ig.

Seriously though, there are some parts of it that I am genuinely proud of and even if my repressed ass wants to die of embarrassment and Catholic guilt every time I think about it I do think it’s a good fic. There may or may not even be a sequel in the works who knows.

2) Glycerin - BNHA, Kiribaku, Rated M, 130K

My baby. My pride and joy. The fic I always keep coming back to. I’ve been writing this fic since I was 16 and genuinely it has been one of the most valuable experiences of my life. It’s still holding on by a thread as my most popular hits wise (damn you Fuckery), but it definitely has the most dedicated and supportive readership of anything I’ve written. Even if it’s not #1 in my kudos it will always be #1 in my heart.

3) hug me, love me, protect me - BNHA, Krbk, Rated T, ~8K

Kind of a sleeper agent tbh. I wrote it for a Christmas exchange and it was kinda out of my comfort zone cause I never write AU stuff but I think it turned out pretty cute! (Though very goofy)

4) Please Just Give Me One Last Kiss - BNHA, Krbk, Rated M, 5K

It’s angsty, it’s cheesy, what more could you want. I should reread it tbh

5) Something In Between - BNHA, Krbk, Rated G, 6.9K

Another fic that is super important to me. Straight up this fic and the zine it was a part of may very well have changed the course of my life (got me to break up with my girlfriend/childhood best friend of 11 years). I still get comments from aromantic people saying that it’s so nice to have a fic that makes them feel seen and even though my sexuality is once again massively up in the air it’s definitely one of the fics that I’ve poured the most of myself into.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to! Though admittedly I’ve been lacking recently 😬

Comments are always such a big motivator for me and I think that 1) it encourages people to keep commenting and 2) since they’ve taken the time to comment it’s nice to take the time to thank them. I should really get caught up on my comments lmao

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Uhhhhh probably either The Thing He Wants or What kind of gift? though tbh I don’t even know if I would count those as full on fics cause they’re both less than 1000 words and were more just ideas that I posted on Twitter and decided to cross post onto ao3 cause why not. I don’t really do full fics with angst endings. I’m a happy endings only kind of person

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

It hasn’t happened yet but Glycerin is gonna have such a happy ending I promise. I actually wrote the epilogue several years ago and sometimes when my motivation is low I go back and read it cause I’m like after all the shit I’ve put him through I need Kat to get to that point.

Insofar as happy endings that have already been published, probably either Please Just Give Me One Last Kiss or Something In Between

Do you write crossovers?

Nope

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nope again

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Well as previously mentioned I tend to be a bit repressed so for a long time I didn’t, but I’ve started to a little bit within the past year thanks to the previously mentioned dare and Ykw it’s pretty fun I can’t lie. It’s nice to get out of my comfort zone a lot a little bit and according to my comments I’m pretty good at it so that’s always fun. So far my smut has been exclusive to Satosugu for the simple reason that it’s one of the few ships I have where I genuinely think the characters are attractive

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not yet, but oh man that would be the biggest compliment ever.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Oof this one is hard. The one I’ve loved for the longest is definitely Sokeefe, but that series is so genuinely bad idk if I can in good conscience call it my all time favorite. Maybe it would be if the characters didn’t still have the personalities of badly written 11 year olds.

Im gonna say my OTP is probably Kiribaku cause I just love how caring and supportive they are of each other while also being very goofy and fun but with plenty of angst potential too, but that being said Satosugu has absolutely consumed me for the past year and a half and I don’t see that disappearing any time soon

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Hands Like Mine, Heart Like His (BNHA, Krbk, Rated G, 8.8K)

It’s a really sweet story but it’s another one that I planned to be long and I’m such a slow writer that I had to choose one long fic to focus on and Glycerin is way too important to me to give up. I still day dream about Hand and Hearts though so maybe someday I’ll add another chapter or two

What are your writing weaknesses?

Speed for sure. I am so abysmally slow it’s awful. The absolute best I can do is maybe 500 words in an hour and that is super rare, like genuinely maybe once or twice a year rare, which especially sucks cause I like writing super long stuff that ends up taking me literal years. I have such an insane amount of respect for writers who can consistently get chapters out every couple of weeks or even days.

What are your writing strengths?

One common thing I get complimented on a lot is making my characters feel human/well rounded which makes me really happy.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think it’s super fun! Unfortunately I only speak English and a little bit of Spanish so I don’t do it often, but I do have a chapter of Two Weeks where a majority of the dialogue is in Spanish and it was a really fun challenge (though idk how accurate the translation is lol). If the POV character speaks the language then usually I’ll provide a translation, but if they don’t I think it’s fun to just have it as is and either have the reader experience the confusion along with the POV character or try to write it in a way where the reader and character can both kind of understand what’s going on even without knowing what’s being said.

What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

Beiguang, CaitVi, GELPHIE. Basically any F/F ship because I am unfortunately cursed with being completely unable to write Sapphic ships despite the fact that I myself am a woman who has exclusively dated other women. I’m hoping Gelphie will save me though. Please.

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Glycerin and Something In Between are definitely the ones that are the most important to me, but I’ve already talked about those so honerable mention goes to In The Garden (JJK, Stsg, Rated G, 2.8K). It’s definitely short and sweet but idk I just think the writing is really good and I’m so proud of how the formatting in that one scene turned out. It genuinely was like a month of me brainstorming ways of visually portraying what I wanted to portray and I think it turned out really well!

Okay wow I actually managed to finish this within the day! (Though it did take me all day). I don’t really have anyone to @ since all in all I’m still relatively new to tumblr so I’ll just do what Hana did and say anyone who wants to go for it!

[cacklefrendly]

I love how you draw your gin and vodka!!!!!they so cool and cute!!!now I wonder what is you're gin backstory.like do he parent work with the organization or something like that??I'm just curious

:D AWW THANKIEEE ANON!! i keep telling myself that i'm gonna draw them being threatening and. it doesn't happen. they end up being sappy again. so im glad i'm not the only one who enjoys it regardless lmao

as for backstories. uh.

good question.

what backstory my personal versions of Gin and Vodka DO have — and my versions of the entire Black Org. team, too — is vague enough to be almost canon-compliant while leaving plenty of wiggle-room in case future canon declares any new information i think is interesting. it's not a tactical choice! working around canon to make things complicated is part of what makes playing with side characters fun for me. :>

also i'll admit: i usually don't think much about a character's childhood unless it gives something meaningful to the story. i don't think it matters too much why Gin got into the Black Organization? to me, it matters more that he's there and making it everyone else's problem :P i might change my mind later though, we'll see!!

for Gin and Vodka, at least, their backstories are more of a years-long, vaguely three-arc showcase of who they are at wildly different points in their lives together, which has some really interesting moments implied but not explicitly stated.

just for fun, here's a synopsis of those 'Arcs': (i remembered to write a transcript this time, it's under the read-more)

“ARC” 1: SETUP (met once, briefly, by accident.)

VODKA (asides: “Just some dude” & “he uses cheap ballpoints and it hurts my soul. he gets better I promise.”)

maybe grew up in a rural area?

recently finished college, working at one of the Black Organization's front companies

dealing with being a closeted gay man while also trying not to get involved in normal office drama and still hear all the gossip

Very Aware that the company is doing some shady illegal stuff and is SUPER CURIOUS, but 1), he'd like to keep being payed thank you, and 2), he has enough self-preservation to know better than to go snooping

honestly he's just Some Guy

GIN (asides: “dysphoria hoodie” & “[PROTOTYPE] called, Alex wants his damn clothes back.”)

where did you even come from-

working as a low-level assassin with the Black Organization but already starting to garner attention from some of the higher-ups

aggressive, paranoid, AND experiencing dysphoria all at the same time!!! uh oh!!

dealing with the gradual realization that being trans is. a Thing. while also having a really bad-ass action movie as a life, complete with betrayal and murder and explosions

starts transitioning after he climbs the Organization's ranks enough to carve out a place he KNOWS he's safe and can relax

“ARC” 2: MEET-NOT-CUTE (a year or two after “Arc” 1)

VODKA

suffering from the aftermath of The Incident and trying to grapple with the fact that he's been working for an international crime syndicate

and trying to understand his role in all of this mess

and trying not to get killed by his new boss

AND is trying not to think about the fact that his new boss is SO scary and mean

AND trying SO HARD NOT TO THINK ABOUT HOW HE'S KINDA INTO THAT-

GIN

high-ranked enough that he can no longer keep working alone and he HATES IT SO MUCH

it's not just a blow to his pride, it's also all the paranoia. it's mostly the paranoia, to be quite honest

called dibs on the most harmless, pathetic-looking man he could find who still seemed to be useful. and that man was Vodka

even so, spends a good while CONVINCED that Vodka will turn on him if Gin gives him the chance.

BOTH

Gin keeps trying to bait Vodka into trying to kill him and is infuriated as nothing happens.

Vodka sees the bait and is confused at first, later horrified when he figures out what Gin's expecting him to do

as Vodka shows his usefulness, Gin starts to calm down. full-on Trust takes several years to develop

the first time Gin falls Asleep near Vodka freaks Gin out more than a little

“ARC” 3: GET A FUCKIN ROOM (roughly a few years before and into Canon)

Vodka: “If you want coffee you gotta’ let go.” Gin: “*unintelligible sounds of disapproval*”

they aren't in a romantic relationship. they haven't even had a one-night stand. and yet they carry a very "aging gays who've been married for 30 years" energy. it drives the Team up the wall.

before the Trust developed, Vodka let Gin control/initiate all contact as an appeasement/self-preservation strategy. at this point he still does it, but out of habit more than anything.

plot twist, Gin's actually super tactile with people he trusts. he invades Vodka's personal space constantly. it's especially bad when he's cold or tired (so, most of the time)

they know each other's boundaries very well even though they never, like, sat down and talked about it. it's been trial and error thus far. it helps that they're also good at reading each other.

Vodka's uncomfortable attraction turned into a crush, which turned into quiet love. Gin's wariness turned into trust, which turned into love. BUT Gin's doesn't think much about trust OR romance so he's not actually aware (yet) that his feelings for Vodka are more than Really Strong Trust. he also doesn't know Vodka's feelings for him (YET)

there are so many ways this fucking slow-burn could end and I love all of them too much to pick just one

[cheemken]

Heyyyyy!!!! It's me once more from the last 3 asks. So I have others questions this time around that I would like to say to you regarding the Pokemon Champion Body Swap AU if you don't mind that is.

1. How did exactly the champions swap bodies? Was it because of Manaphy because I know it is the pokemon who has the ability to swap bodies of pokemon or people? Or is it something else entirely?

2. Do you think Sycamore and Sonia would help the champions sort their problem since they are both professors? And maybe Lillie? Idk.

3. Do you think a friend of one of the champions would tried to find Manaphy or at least a Manaphy egg to help swap them back? If so, who exactly?

4. I knew you already answer a question similar like this before, but... What is exactly Hala's reaction to the body swap? Is he fine with Geeta in his grandson's body around? How does he cope with the fact his grandson could be anywhere in one of the champion's bodies? But still, you are right for Hala storming out of Alola just to find his grandson😂

5. I know this sounds very personal to ask, though how do some of the champions handle going to the bathroom to pee problems? Do they ask for the assistance of some of the characters or just do it on their own?

6. Who out of the champions is most uncomfortable with the situation and which one is the least? Or are they all just equally unsettled?

7. How long does their body swap last exactly?

8. How does Geeta think of the Alola kids and other Alola characters? And Steven too with the other Unova characters since he was being interrogated like a Plasma grunt? Or Hau with the Indigo league? Or just the others champion with each of the region's league? I bet someone in the Indigo league would give Hau some ice cream or any dessert in general just to calm him down lol. If so, who? Though, I'm sure Hau will be disappointed about the fact that they are no malasadas in the Johto region😂

That's all! Hope it's not too much! Also I would love to play the Reverse: 1999 game however, my phone storage is almost packed😥 Still, I bet it's a good game though! :D

Ah this is quite long hahah

But yeah to answer these

1 and 3] No, actually, I didn't think of Manaphy when making this, instead what I had in mind was like smth similar to the anime Kokoro Connect, are you familiar w that? But yeah, in that anime they kinda switched bodies and such y'know, all bc of this guy iirc, but here it's not a guy, it's just me thinking it'd be funny lmfao

2] I think Sycamore would help, as would Sonia, seeing as these two are close w two of the champions, and bc now that Sycamore found out it's Leon he finally understands why Dia doesn't like him much lmfao (just a lil hc of mine really, that Dia and Leon don't like each other much)

4] Hala would be weirded out lmfaooo like that is a grown woman inside his grandson's body, and he doesn't even know where his grandson even is. I think he'd be low-key unnerved by Geeta, she just has that effect lmao, but she does try to be civil and explains to him that hey, she has contacted the other champions, and they'll find Hau soon enough (and then right after her phone rang w a message from the Indigo League and safe to say she finally get to answer Hala's question on where Hau is)

5] look look listen, Steven just tries to hold it in or he'd just, not look as he does his business, Leon and Dia on the other hand yeah they're like, struggling™ lmfao, they're too prideful to ask for help tho let's be real

6] Steven, pls, save that man, he's being interrogated like he's Zinzolin😭 the others are at least a bit chill, w the other leagues helping them out and even some friends and family, but Steven was far away from Hoenn, and he does not at all like the way Hilbert, Drayden, and Drayton are looking at him as if he just killed Iris in front of them lmfao

7] I haven't actually thought abt it much ngl hahah for the lols probs a week, just so the champions are like, aware that oh, so this is what the others are going through

8] I think Hau would finally calm down and maybe even befriend the Indigo League tho, they're nice, like, yeah some are intimidating, but they're really nice to him, and even gave him a Rage Candy Bar, while it's no Malasada, he appreciates it

Cynthia and Lance, well, they're vibing™ lmfao, like, other than being teased by Lisia, the twins, and even Sidney and Brawly, well, least they're trying to figure out how to help. Granted they're all weirded out at seeing Lance's scowl on Steven's fave lol

Wallace in the Sinnoh League, honestly they're just weirded out how Cynthia looks more active, like after the reveal yeah ofc it's Wallace, but damn it's still so surreal seeing him at the lake and dancing w Milotic, bc ofc, it's Cynthia's body, and they have not seen Cynthia dance like that lmfao. Ofc Gardenia have that shit filmed ofc she does, blackmail when Cynthia gets back to her body

Steven, oh we already know how he's faring lmfaooo he thanks Arceus above that Bianca doesn't look at him weird and actually tries to help and well, stop Hilbert from killing him

Leon, yeah, he sees the side eyes Sycamore gives him, and the side eyes Malva gives him, and the side eyes Siebold gives him, and he also thanks Arceus that Drasna and Wikstrom are helpful, they decided to not tell the rest of the league just yet, as rumours spread like wildfire in Kalos, and they don't wanna make this a big issue as they're trying to resolve it w the other champions. He made a joke that maybe Malva would report this, the side eye that Malva, Siebold, and Sycamore gave him almost asphyxiated him w how thick the tension was lmfaoooo

Geeta, honestly after finding out where Hau is, and which champion is in control of her body, well, she's now just waiting for further instructions from the others. Hala is still vibing, he's there saying that maybe Hau should come back home here, but Geeta said that that won't be ideal w their current predicament, and told him that hey, she can play Hau well right? No one would suspect anything (she's awful lmfao, everyone figured out real quick but just played along)

Dia, was,, well, tired™, look, the only thing she's looking forward to everyday is the fact that she can come home to have dinner w family. While it's not her family, she's there just imagining that Leon's mom and Hop are Drasna and Sycamore. She absolutely hated doing Leon's pose tho, and there was on time a crowd wanted her to do it and ofc she did bc in their eyes she's the undefeated Leon (and God she scoffs at that), and when she does it she's dying of cringe and prays the earth swallows her whole. Sonia notices everytime and can't help but snicker, for a seasoned actress like Diantha, she's always so close to breaking character when doing that pose

Iris loves the feeling of being tall tho real, Geeta is one of the taller champions along w Leon, Lance, Cynthia, and Wallace, and while Iris is getting taller as she's growing, but damn, she loves Geeta's height lmfao. Penny looks up to her as she tells her what she has to do to make it seem natural she's like Geeta, but Iris is so distracted by the way she sees a lot of things through Geeta's eyes w this height hahah

But yeah hahah

Also, I'm sorry but like, I hope you understand that I'm not that motivated to make pkmn aus and hcs that much anymore. Don't get me wrong, pkmn is still special to me, I still reblog stuff, but yeah, I'm like,, really not motivated much to make aus and the like, I'm sorry ;w;

But hey, I hope my answers for your questions suffices tho hahah

[catchyhuh]

Oh god I am so in love with the way you write these, I’ve smiled like an idiot reading all of them. I laughed aloud at the idea of Goemon returning someone’s kid only for them to suddenly be a master of stealth.

If by any miracle you catch this ask and feel like thinking about it; do you have any opinions on what jobs the gang might be keeping should they belong in a universe that is totally mundane? Are they all interlinked/do they keep well out of eachothers’ way, has Lupin ever managed to stay employed for over a month etc. etc.

:,) I’d love to hear your takes on this simply because I think about it a lot. I think it’s an interesting character study.

i pride myself on my thoughts either being true or funny so it warms the lupin sized hole in my lupin sized heart that i am hitting one of those notes at least SO THANK YOU SO SO VERY MUCH LET’S TALK ABOUT MORTGAGES AND SHIT

lupin:

lupin. does not change that much as a person. like demeanor, personality-wise, he's still loud, giggly, smug even when it's unjustified, he’s just slightly less main-character-y about it, but he’s still the guy that says goodbye to everyone in the starbucks before he leaves and for some reason everyone feels compelled to say it back

jumps from job to job BUT. there was ONE time he got employee of the month. he was a solid olive garden waiter. but maybe he was just getting those favor points for being too lazy to bother the table refilling water every two minutes, and the little magic tricks he did were cute, and frankly, lupin is just a memorable name that you’d bring up if someone asked about the service there. honestly he only worked there to sneak bites of the pasta and because he thought the getup was sleek

jigen was his neighbor as a kid, and honestly they didn’t immediately like each other until they were like 15ish and caught each other trying to sneak out of the house after they’d both been grounded for completely separate events. they thought it was funny and hung out that night and after that they started to ACTUALLY grow close. nowadays they’ve got that “we’ve known each other for two decades and we’re still as close as ever” type thing everybody wishes they had, and they catch up about a week on average if they don’t just normally bump into each other. they were prob even roomies at some point

jigen:

i can very easily see his like mundane normal life being oddly content. this is maybe weird but i’m getting like. an everything-repairman here. he still has that gruff, doesn’t totally want to be here vibe, but he’s so damn good at like carpentry and mechanics that his yelp review average is pretty good! like hey. if your washer works again your washer works again. it just took two and a half hours of perfect silence with this guy sitting in your home.

as a result, jigen is unusually the tie between fujiko and goemon to lupin. he did some work at their places of business, mentioned this woman who barely looked up to wave when he came in to fix the lights, and then this man who wouldn’t STOP keeping his eyes on him once he came in, watching him like a hawk, and lupin was like wtf. weird people. unrelated uh where did you say they worked and what were their names, heights and zodiac signs?

definitely the porch guy. y’know the neighbor everyone had at some point who just gets home and sits on the porch for like three hours. jigen is that guy. the funny thing is cuz of his hat (which. maybe is like a baseball cap now idk the fedora seems unfitting for standard average joe life) nobody can even tell he’s fallen asleep twenty minutes in and isn’t actually casually keeping watch over the street. classic jigen move

fujiko: 

the funny thing is. honestly aside from the theft and espionage her CURRENT life could translate pretty well. there’s no cap to the discord kitten grindset. BUT SHE’D NEVER STOOP THAT LOW LMAO she's probably just chatting up the usual camps of nepo babies trying sooo hard to impress people and old men that miiiight write her into the will

i think she’s got a gig at a bridal shop/just a formal dress shop in general. she’s very interested in the way trends change and the sheer amount of bank people are willing to lay down just because of a brand? like she got her boyfriend last year to buy her this prada bag but that was someone ELSE’S problem, not hers! 9 times out of 10 she’s just doing her job but if she slowly starts to actually click with a client she’ll guide them to where they can find some nice jewelry that’s still quality but not highway robbery

still in that schrodinger’s relationship with lupin, it’s just, slightly more communicated between them here. if you asked if she had a boyfriend, she’d probably say no, but after spending a bit of time talking to her you notice that she keeps bringing up this one specific guy she used to be with, kinda like she. is currently with him? and then lupin comes in like “hey bbg i brought you some panera for your lunchbreak! they were outta the soup you like at the first one so i ran by two <3” and she’s like “thank you darling just set it on the table over there!” and he leaves. and you just stare at her. no further conversation on the matter transpires

goemon: 

oh god it’s so hard for me to imagine him being some average guy. first thing that came to mind is his hair is still that long, he just keeps it tied back for convenience’s sake and when he lets it down everyone’s like oh shit!! he’s kinda rocking that! also tends to wear big cardigans and coats to like. evoke the imagery of his usual attire Wait those are more character redesign notes than anything let's get back on track here

what job would fucking OHHH A MUSEUM GUY?? not really the sharing history with people half but like, keeping artifacts clean, organizing displays, having all that knowledge in his head but just not really telling anyone lol IT’S NOT THAT HE’S BOTHERED by the idea of throwing a little knowledge on the patrons, he just gets into so much of the nitty gritty that the average person has no idea how they went from talking about wood carvings to erosion on the shore of shizuoka. on that note are we set in japan here? uhhhhhhhhhhhhh?hhhh?? maybe

only really consistently hangs with jigen, and really, it’s because of jigen’s repair gig. museums break a lot! goemon doesn’t really mesh with too many people upfront, so he’s very interested in why he has some gut reaction to jigen despite only having spoken to him for two hours total in the last month. over time they’d become actual friends, but it’d take a bit for him to reach the “this is my man lupin and the purse with legs is his broad” introduction and then the way he WORDS that introduction starts an entire fight that leaves goemon absolutely baffled at how these people are. maybe friends? in time he warms up to them though, but maybe it’d take some unusual bonding experience, like a camping trip that immediately went south

zenigata:

saying he’d be a cop is BORING he wouldn’t be a COP. … there’s a distinction between a cop and a private investigator alright? BUT NO REALLY LET’S HAVE FUN WITH THIS yknow what would suck but really be funny. boring job. 9 to 5 office shit with nothing to do all day. oh he’d hate it, he’d be like pacing the room and shit just waiting for an excuse to actually DO something cuz its so fucking DULL in this FUCKING BEIGE BUILDING. like that bob's burger's bit where he has a nightmare about working in accounting or whatever

the story in the og manga was that somehow lupin and zenigata (and i believe fujiko too?) met in college. which. hey man the numbers could line up and frankly it sounds hilarious so i’ll buy that. he runs into him time to time just organically and  still doesn’t like him a lot lot but it’s more of a personality thing than anything else. and without the occasional heroics their original life has, zeni doesn’t get to see the actual good potential for a kind person like he has before so despite them having less reasons to beef HE LIKES LUPIN EVEN LESS IN THIS WORLD. maybe he’ll come around eventually 

sorry to keep going on this train of thought but really he’d be so different from his actual self just because of the different circumstances that it's really interesting to me. internally he’s the same but being subjected to the crazy shit in the franchise (strangely enough) kinda softened him up externally, but THIS zenigata doesn’t have that. so he’s like, polite to strangers and all. holds the door open for you. but he’s just so BITTER inside about how much more interesting things COULD be, like there’s envy there about how the gang doesn’t seem bothered by anything and has fun almost every day he happens to see what they’re up to. how does that even make sense?! SORRY THAT’S NOT REALLY FUN I DUNNO WHAT'S POSSESSED ME HERE just give him some time, some weirdo event will happen and it’ll knock everything within him back into place as we know him normally. he just needs the right insane motivation to fire up that deranged part of him that’s been lying dormant for a few decades

it just occurred to me i never mentioned mortgages once. damn

[holybananaoafshoe]

Team Dynamics 🐺

Scary Dog Privilege 1/10

Xiao, Zhongli, Benny, Kazuha

I’m not going to stop with the Tired Ice Dads, but I definitely need to start the Fontaine quests before doing more on them lmao. Buuuuuuuut, I have other main teams on my account that I shove together, and after doing the Ice Dads, I started cackling about the crack energy this group would have.

A little taste to enjoy~

Zhongli just wanted to fucking retire and flirt with Child but that’s besides the point.

He can’t help that his adopted son just does not have a single ounce of self-preservation in his body.

He morally can’t let him go off on his own too much, or else he’d get gray hairs from having to run to his rescue last minute *cough* the chasm *cough*

That and Xiao has been having a lot of issues with his karmic debt lately.

While he doesn’t like Barbatos, Rex Lapis can’t let his last adepti die like his siblings had he can’t fail him like the others, so he could swallow his pride and ask Batbatos to erase Xiao’s karmic debt.

And if he can help Xiao, that's an added bonus.

Or force him into some self care

He’s not exactly in the team yet. He just comes by to check on them every once in a while.

Much to Xiao’s distaste, his dad has been following him around--he’s a very capable adepti, thanks.

He really is, technically, he’s the strongest since Zhongli has to hold back his power now.

But, he secretly likes that Zhongli is looking out for him.

And maaayyybbeeee he enjoys listening to Zhongli talk about random things and lowkey put historians in their place.

Xiao meets Kazuha and Benny by chance tbh.

Kazuha was minding his business, honest, and wandering around the plains of Liyue because the Crux’s crew was taking a break from the sea.

He was lounging on a rock, playing a tune on a leaf, when the wind picked up and told him someone was in danger.

(listen, I don’t know how it works either. He’s just very in tune with nature ig).

So, he couldn’t just ignore the call… and he’s nosey, so sue him if he wanted to know what was up.

Low and behold, it was poor Bennett fighting off a Mantichural.

Look… it wasn’t his fault!!!

How was he supposed to know that climbing up a rock formation (it was more like a mini mountain really) to get a better idea of where he was, because of course he was lost, would end up with him tripping on a mist flower (yes a mist flower), falling off said rock formation, and land him on top of a very pissed Mantichural?!?!?!?!?

Not him!!!!

He was just trying to go on commissions for the guild!

Benny was handling it pretty okay, but the poor boy was having a rough day and was extremely grateful that Kazuha had come along to help.

Between the two, they were doing pretty solid.

Xiao heard the commotion and came over. It is his duty to make sure the citizens and travelers of Liyue were safe after all.

Both are very impressed and somewhat scared at how fast Xiao defeats the Mantichural.

He takes them to Wangshu Inn, and everyone thought they would part ways after that.

Wrooonnggg.

After hearing about Benny’s adventures, Kazuha decides to team up with him because he’s honestly worried about his safety.

Xiao winds up saving them both like five more times before joining them because he’s sick of saving them every hour.

He was headed to Liyue Harbor anyway.

The two are thankful, but his quiet demeanor and straight-to-the-point personality is off-putting.

They finally get to Liyue Harbor and part ways….

Not lmao

Xiao saves Benny from drowning in the harbor and finds a frantic Kazuha about ready to jump in the sea after the kid.

Literally, Xiao was just passing by after meeting with Madam Ping when he saw them.

Soon after that, he winds up saving Benny from choking on food during the diner. Benny and Kazuha invited him to thank him.

He really tried to tell them it wasn’t necessary, but Benny’s dads taught him well, and he’s going to properly thank Xiao.

Fuck, guess Xiao has to look after them now bc this dumbass is going to keep him awake at night.

So he joins Benny’s team :)

[willow-balcoin]

holiday prompt → chan balcoin.

001. under the mistletoe—

Chan tends to be hyper aware of mistletoe so he can avoid it at all costs, was probably a cootie believer when he was a kid. Nowadays he doesn't subscribe to the idea that he needs a plant hanging over his head to help him with that kind of thing. Would definitely give his mom a peck on the cheek though, low key cutie.

002. in front of the fireplace, cuddled up under a blanket with a hot drink.

He's alone for sure. He's immune to cuffing season propaganda BUT might feel a twinge in his chest when faced with family nights and his sister and cousins all bringing their someones around. If he asks anyone if Tara's coming around, no he didn't.

003. snowed in from a heavy snow storm.

Everyone in his family's circle is a yes and a no. Yes because he has a quiet longing to be part of the family his mom has built and it would be nice to finally be a proper part of one of their big family stories that will be recounted for years down the line, but no because he's realised he made a mistake following his dad and allowing himself to be cut off from said family. Now he's too prideful to admit how badly he wants to be part of it so it's easier to stay on the outside looking in.

004. at a busy dinner table, food piled on the center and family chaos ensuing around the house.

If it's with the Balcoins and co. I think it'd be good vibes!! He's still figuring out where he fits amongst everyone and knows he's the shiny new thing they're all paying attention to so he's pretty reserved. He's steadily finding his feet as his own person outside of his father's shadow though so I think everyone would be pleasantly surprised when he starts showing some actual personality.

005. standing in front of the christmas tree, decorating it with an assortment of baubles, lights and tinsel.

I'd say he's indifferent to the decorating business, he'll leave those decisions to his mom, but he definitely encouraged her to get a stupidly large tree because he never really had that type of stereotypical holiday experience with his dad. Having some family time with just Daphne and Willow while decorating the tree would have healed some of the unacknowledged childhood trauma he's harbouring. The magic of Christmas etc etc.

006. setting out snacks for santa and his reindeers. don't forget the milk and cookies for christmas hardest workers!

Despite his dad being a hardass I wouldn't suggest he was an awful person, so I think he would have helped Willow set things up for the kids when they were little– footprints in flour through the kitchen to a plate of cookies, a half finished glass of milk and so on. Probably realised Santa wasn't real when his nosy little self found his parents taking bites out of carrots as if reindeer had been in the house. Definitely snitched to all the other kids too lmao.

007. at the mall, waiting in line to sit on santa's lap and spill your christmas gift wishes. will you be deemed naughty or nice?

I would say he's on the nice list. Could technically be nicer, but he's doing his best while dealing with his own shit. He'd quietly be pretty pleased about that, he definitely reacts well to praise.

008. exchanging and open gifts, anticipating what gift they may get. is it something cool or just another pair of socks?

Wishlist wise he'd be hoping for some acknowledgement from his father after their falling out. He wouldn't get it as such, just a generally addressed Christmas card to them all in the mail, but he knows if he wants the man's attention he needs to achieve something first. His task for the year ahead is figuring out whether appeasing his father aligns with his own desires or if it's too detrimental. Best gift he ever got was probably light up sneakers when he was a kid. He's still chasing the high of the joy he felt on that day.

009. auditions are now open for the town christmas extravaganza !!!

Oh Channie is so not a performer, his skills are purely that of observation. Back in the day I'm sure Tara managed to wrangle him into being part of productions though. Catch him painted up like Peeta Mellark as Rock Number 3. He would hate being on stage, but he was her biggest fan so being able to support her moment in the spotlight from right there with her..... 🥺🤧

010. in the trenches of snow forts, amidst a war of a snow fight! who will win?  

Dude's a human bulldozer– he loves a snowball fight. Definitely got in trouble a lot as a kid because of it, probably always jumping out of nowhere initiating things which could go either way depending on who he was flinging the snowballs at. FOR SURE got in the shit for having an icicle sword fight at school one time.