#Final live is tomorrow 🥲

[daily-utsu-p]

I met Zsasz today. :)

[moonkhao]

hi.

[4ugust4rt]

It’s…happening….I’m drawing…….

[27demos]

everyone adores you (at least i do)

Matt Maltese in Manila, Philippines

Asia & Australia Tour 2023

[triplefrontierbabe]

Oscar Piastri smau

pairing: f! reader x Oscar Piastri

warnings: use of yn, Oscar is just a big sap for his gf

disclaimer: photos from Pinterest and/or Instagram, I take no credit for photos

yourusername

liked by mclaren , opeightyone and 5,803 others

yourusername leaving Hungary with a lot of core memories filled with love 🇭🇺 so proud of you Oscar, it’s been a long time coming 🧡🏆🐨

view 67 comments

oscarpiastri thank you my love. so glad you could be here 🧡🧡

↳ yourusername I wouldn’t miss it for the world

nicolepiastri my dear, what a weekend to experience! sending you all my love 😘

↳ yourusername definitely an unforgettable weekend!! miss you!

opeightyone we suspect you’re his good luck charm now! 😉

mclaren so glad to have you this weekend!

yourbestfriend omg!!!!!!!!!! go yn’s boyfriend!!!🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

oscsbiggestfan81 she’s so pretty wtf how is she so gorgeous

yeposcaryep Oscar can you fight?

oscarpiastri

liked by landonorris , danielricciardo and 1,689,930 others

oscarpiastri still soaking in the weekend. absolutely surreal. thanks to everyone who made it possible. dream big. 🧡🇭🇺🏆🏎️

view 673 comments

yourusername little you is so proud 🥹🥲 you’ve come so far

danielricciardo right on, mate! congrats!🇦🇺🦘🐨

logansargeant so freaking happy for you bro!!

landonorris congrats!

opeightyone that’s our guy!!!!!!!

georgerussell63 lets goo!!! congrats mate!!

alex_albon yes! go Oscar!!!

ausgp making Australia proud! 🇦🇺

mclaren go Oscar!!! so proud!!

f1fan81 poor little Oscar, he doesn’t know how bad mclaren strategy was gonna be 😔

landolover4 lando deserved that win

landodefender4life lando was robbed

forzaferrarifan guys stop acting like the bad strategy is Oscar and Lando’s fault

↳ williamsfan2 as a Williams fan, I can confirm bad strategy is not by fault of the drivers 😔

yourusername

liked by francisca.cgomes , lilymhe and 6, 378 others

yourusername do not text or call, busy getting lost in Australia 🌊☀️🏄‍♀️

view 73 comments

yourbestfriend part of me feels like the whole “lost” part is real since Oscar’s leading the way 🤣

↳ nicolepiastri I second this 🤣🤣🤣

↳ yourusername I can neither confirm nor deny 🤐

↳ oscarpiastri hey I’m pretty good with directions most of the time!

lilymhe oh now this is the dream 🤩

↳ yourusername would be dreamier if you were here 😙

oscarpiastri catch the waves same time tomorrow?

↳ yourusername always ;)

f1waggossip101 yn is slowly convincing me that living in Monaco isn’t all that and I’m here for it

↳ f1wagteaspreader she’s not all that 🤣

↳ randomf1fan01 girl she’s literally dating Oscar and all you do is run an anonymous gossip page 😑

oscarpiastri

liked by lewishamilton, huntermcelrea and 1, 794, 784 others

oscarpiastri time to unwind and enjoy time with my favorite people

view 674 comments

landonorris weird, because I’m not there

↳ yourusername uh oh, anything to say for yourself Oscar?

↳ oscarpiastri invite got lost in the waves??

nicolepiastri glad to have you home 😘😘 fyi your laundry is done

↳ oscarsbiggestfan bahahahahah I love Nicole

danielricciardo now this is the life

↳ oscarpiastri don’t ya know it

yourusername sad to report despite all the time spent in the water, I still haven’t turned into a mermaid :((

↳ yourbestfriend this is absolutely devastating 😩😩

↳ francisca.cgomes this is so unfair for you 😔

logansargeant boating is better in Florida

opeightyone he is the embodiment of Aussie lifestyle

mclaren surfing king!

oscarstan I want what they have

yourusername

liked by alexandrasaintmleux , heidiberger_ and 10, 732 others

yourusername I’ve loved you five summers now honey but I want em all 🩷 happy anniversary to the guy who never fails to make me smile, feel loved and tie my shoes 🦋💌✨🤍

view 203 comments

oscarpiastri I love you so much darling, the light of my life

heidiberger_ happy anni love birds!

↳ yourusername ily 🥹

nicolepiastri I’m so glad Oscar finally decided to ask you out after months of talking about you💖 you’re such a joy to have around😘

↳ yourusername thanks for pushing him to do so 🤭

logansargeant what no pic creds for the last pic? happy anniversary of Oscar manning up and asking you out

↳ yourusername 😂😂😂 love ya log, never change

landonorris this should be an international holiday

yourbestfriend happy anniversary to the cutest couple to ever grace this planet 😍

op81fan universe I’ve seen what you can do for others 🧎‍♀️

lilymhe im sobbing you guys are the cutest 🥹😭🩷

francisca.cgomes the first photo is ethereal

oscarpiastri

liked by landonorris , aussiegrit and 1, 789, 093 others

oscarpiastri love you then, love you now, love you forever ❤️ fiver years down, forever to go. your love is the best thing about this world❤️💐 (still not sure what I did right to keep her around this long, but im not complaining)

view 790 comments

yourusername osc 😭😭😭 I love you more than words

yourusername let’s get lost on another late night car ride soon?

↳ landonorris I will not be the photographer this time 🙅‍♂️

opeightyone happy anniversary to you guys! wishing you many more years of happiness!

logansargeant been a fan of this since day 1 ☝️

↳ yourusername me too

landonorris glad she’s around to keep you in line

↳ yourusername you mean both of you right.

danielricciardo aussies are the best lovers confirmed

↳ heidiberger_ Daniel 🤣😭

papayaloverrr they’ve been together that long??????

↳ formulawags no fr I was thinking the same we only started seeing her this season

op81defender put a ring on it alreadyyyyy

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚

click here to view my Masterlist

click here to read texts with Oscar

click here for Daniel smau

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ ౨ৎ ⋆｡˚

smau taglist: @bernelflo @ifyouaintfirstyourelastt @f1updates4you

[shkudss]

Weakened by Eywa Pt. 1

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

Masterlist

Summary: Ao’nung finally realizes that his actions have consequences

Warnings: curse words, bullying, mental breakdown, English isn’t my first language

Author’s note: it my first Avatar writing, so I hope you like it! This idea was spontaneous and I’m not really good at writing, but I hope you’ll enjoy it! I’m still learning how to use Tumblr properly since I don’t really use it 🥲

Yawntutsyip - darling, little loved one

Yaymak - foolish, ignorant

You thought that all these days when you flew to the water clans were the hardest in you life. Little did you know that life with Metkayina would be harder. You expected to finally live a normal life, doing your chores without being sacred to be shot by sky people. Now you’re safe, but things didn’t get better.

Since your arrival, these boys were bullying all your siblings, including you. You have no idea why it is important for Ao’nung to see totally similar to him Na’vis. You all are same avatars with slight differences that were unavoidable due to the environment you’re supposed to live in. Oh, yeah… supposed to live.

“What are you even doing here?”

“You’re so useless to our tribe”

“Go back to your monkey house”

All these words almost engraved in you mind without leaving space for other thoughts and hope. It’s been two weeks since you arrived and you still haven’t ridden an Ilu successfully, you can’t hold your breath as Metkayinas do. This makes you feel horrible and believe all these mean words.

“C’mon, Y/N, you can do it!”

Neteyam is trying to teach you how to deal with ilu and his voice is so calming, he really believes in you as an older brother. You wish you could just believe him, but insecurity lays too deep and securely in your mind.

“I don’t know… I can’t…”

Your voice was really soft and quiet as you’re the calmest child in your family. You don’t like loud sounds and fast actions. That’s just the way you are. Neytiri says that Sylwanin was just like you.

Despite being slower and more sensitive that other Sullys they loved and protected you with all their heart. Jake knew that Kiri and Tuk are different, they can deal with their problems a lot easier, while you cannot. When something bad to your family or yourself happens, you worry a lot and you won’t tell anyone about your worries unless they make you to. That was the hardest part of you character.

“Hey, are you okay? Do you need to take a break? We can continue tomorrow, don’t worry yawntutsyip.”

Neteyam was worried about your mental state, you were too quiet these days and it never meant anything good. Trying to make you speak about your feelings was completely impossible. You always think that your family has too much to worry about to burden them with your own issues. You want to be like Kiri and Tuk. That’s hilarious, Tuk is way younger than you but she’s able to deal with her emotions way easier than you.

“I’m good. Can we just take a break for like half an hour? I think my brain melts.”

You awkwardly smiled at the end trying to lighten the mood. Neteyam smiled back, feeling relief as you seemed to be just tired. He didn’t want you to hide anything from him and your family.

“Okay, yawntutsyip. I’ll go find Lo’ak and make sure his ass hadn’t get in trouble again. Kiri is on that side of the beach by the way. You can join her, she’s probably flirting with plants again. Let’s meet here in an hour.”

You laughed at his little joke about Kiri. But that’s a fact. Since you arrived here all she’s been doing is examining all local flora and fauna. You missed your time together in the forest, maybe now you’ll have a chance to talk and just be together.

“Okay!”

“Tell me if something goes wrong.”

You knew this look. The big brother look. Sometimes you think how hard it would be for you to live without your family, the way you’re connected to them something really fascinating. And one of your love signs is time. Spending time with your family and each member is the way you show love, the way you feel protected and loved.

You see Kiri laying down in water and looking for something. She didn’t see anyone around, attracted by… water? You didn’t try to understand what’s going on in her mind.

“Hey, pandora geek.”

You stood in front of Kiri and the shadow from your body covered her. Only after that she raised her head and squinted at you.

“I thought you’re with Neteyam. What’s wrong?” She sat on the sand, water was covering her legs a little. You did the same thing, hugging your knees and placing your head on them.

“We took a break, my brain doesn’t work properly. I still can’t ride ilu.”

Hopeless sigh made your sister chuckle, but then she saw your eyes. They were full of sadness, you were not happy. Kiri felt guilt, as your sister she had to be with you, she forgot that Sullys stick together.

“What bothers you?” You were not sure if it’ll be okay to tell her everything. But you family always encourage you to speak what lays in your heart, so you decided to do it.

“There’s a lot… I miss home, I miss flying with you, Neteyam and Lo’ak around Hallelujah mountains.” You were vulnerable now and this is one of those rare moments when you opened your feelings easily. Kiri was the only one you did it with. You could feel tears coming to your eyes, you needed this. “I just miss our way of life. I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to get used to it. Especially, when you always hear…”

“Hey monkeys! Still can’t ride ilu? How can you be so yaymak? You’re both freaks!” you could recognize this voice in millions. “One sister has demon blood, another is too dumb to do things that even infants can do!”

Ao’nung and his friends were coming towards you. Kiri’s body immediately tensed, you could feel it.

“What do you want? Is there nothing to do?”

Ao’nung and his friends came closer and you both stood up. Kiri was looking at him angrily, ready to fight. You were supposed to have such a good conversation, opening each other your soul, but this bully spoiled everything.

“My goal for now is to get rid of such fake Na’vis like you two and your stupid little brother.”

You were furious, how dare he talk like this about your family. Yes, he did say mean things to you, but he still picked his words. Now it’s too much. Nobody can talk about your family this way.

“Shut up and don’t get close to me and my siblings!” You tried to get into protective sister mode. Kiri was shocked by the way you raised your voice. She’s never heard such tone from you before.

“Look at this! Little girl knows how to talk?” Ao’nung was teasing you and laughing with Roxto and the rest of his friends. “Maybe you’ll learn how to swim properly soon by the time my future brother or sister will turn 10. Hopefully.”

You clenched your fists, trying to hold all your emotions. Anger, offense, sadness. It felt like a hurricane of extremely high spectrum of emotions, which was hard for you to bear.

“Don’t you dare…”

You didn’t control yourself that you were coming closer and pushing him. The reason why you felt this way was in him.

He did this to you.

You didn’t care that he was taller than you and all you faced was his shoulders. You didn’t care that he barely moved as you tried to hurt him as much as he hurt you. All he did was laughing. It seemed like Ao’nung didn’t understand anything you said, like he didn’t see you breaking into pieces right in front of you.

“Calm down, you little skxawng!” It was a joke for him. For you it was your last piece of composure.

“You’re dumb! So dumb that you can’t even understand how much pain you give me! Every day I wish I don’t meet you so you won’t shower me with all your shit! Every night I cry myself to sleep because all your mean words you’ve said hurt me! And you don’t understand me, how can you be so mean?”

You were screaming at him and trying to hit, mental breakdown took over your senses. You could physically feel how your heart hurts and legs weaken. All sounds were heard as if from under the water, you didn’t see what’s going on around you. Someone’s holding your shoulders and pushing you to their chest to not let you fall on your knees.

“Don’t touch her!”

Furious voice sounded from afar. Neteyam. Your brother who always protects you, surrounds you with love you need. That’s why he calls you yawntutsyip. Little loved one.

You could feel your brother as he came closer to you. His steps were as heavy as his mood. When he saw you breaking down in front of this asshole and because of this asshole, he almost lost his temper. The way chief’s son was holding and looking at you, finally realizing that his actions have consequences. He had to drive you crazy to understand it.

“Back off! Now!”

He pushed Ao’nung as he got closer to him, taking off his hands off you. You didn’t realize it was him, who held you all this time. Was it long? Actually, everything happened in less than 2 minutes, but for you it was like an infinity.

“What happened?”

Lo’ak was here, he saw you crying in Kiri’s hands and Neteyam fighting with Ao’nung and his friends. He didn’t need to check on all details to punch Roxto and other guys.

“It’s fine, we’re here. Don’t worry.” Kiri was sitting with you and slowly swaying, while tapping your head to calm you down.

“I’m sorry, I…” that’s all you could say.

Neither you nor Kiri noticed how the fight stopped until Neteyam came closer and examined you. His eyebrow was cut so as his lower lip, but he didn’t care. Now he could feel only your pain.

“Yawntutsyip… my sister.”

“I’m sorry, Neteyam. I didn’t…” You were gasping for breath from crying, not being able to collect your thoughts.

“Shhh, that’s fine, you’re fine. We’re here, nobody will hurt you again.” Kiri gave you to Neteyam, he was calming you down repeating the same moves as Kiri did. You were crying, letting all pain, that was suppressed inside of your soul, to flow through you.

Your siblings knew that you need to feel it to let it go. That is the only way for relief.

“Let’s go home, yawntutsyip?” Neteyam’s voice was calming as always, he hated seeing you crying.

You just nodded in agreement, hiding your face in brother’s neck and holding him as if someone can take you from him in any moment.

Yes, most Na’vis are brave, ready to fight and protect their beloved ones. But you just can’t do it. You are the one who needs to be protected. Eywa created you that way and you can do nothing about it.

“Don’t ever come to our sisters, you little bitch! Are you so insecure that you’re afraid to battle with me and choose those who are weaker than you?” Lo’ak didn’t miss to say the last goodbye before following after all of you. He didn’t wait for the answer, he didn’t need it.

Ao’nung was standing up there and looking as your figures disappear. No words are in his mind, except for one.

“Fuck”

————————————————————————

I hope you liked it! I’m not sure if I’ll write the second part🫣 I have an idea but idk if it’s worth it, we’ll see!

[jenny-in-a-jar]

🌈 2 Days Until my Surgery 🌈

(Picture taken June 8th, 2024)

I'm very very excited for my surgery (it's my second gender affirming surgery but this one is more significant to me since it'll be top and bottom surgery) and I'm obviously counting the days until it and I thought some people might be interested in my trans journey 🏳️‍⚧️ I finished up most of the story yesterday so today I'll queerness bc it's pride month under the cut! 🌈🌈🌈

But you can read through my journey starting here

First, let's talk about this outfit. Yes, I bought the shorts and top at Spencer's and honestly you can easily find someone who matches it at a large enough pride event. But, it's hard for me to not be sentimental about it. Especially since I wore it at least once the last three years.

(Pictures taken June 11, 2022 and June 10, 2023)

And you can see how it and I have subtly changed these last three years of my transition. (Too bad I didn't have for my first year of transition but such is life 🤷‍♀️). And every year I get excited to wear it again!

Because being queer means a lot to me. I wasn't one of those people who always knew they were queer. But, I never felt connected to my cishet peers either. It's odd looking back and thinking about how my normal group of friends were cishet but at things like summer camp and then college I would quickly make friends with queer people. I really wanted to be like them but couldn't know why because I felt like I didn't deserve to be as cool and free as them.

But, when I let myself dive head into queerness I finally realized that I queer people are mostly awkward nerds and all of them just want to live their lives as fully honestly themselves. And that I could relate to. And that's what made it easy for me "to rip off the band-aid" and transition. It's what let me walk out into a world where I knew I would get hateful stares because I knew I wasn't alone. And seeing how other queer people's eyes light up when they see me showed me I made the right decision because I made them feel less alone too.

And making friends in the queer community is so much easier than in the cishet community. Because there's a lot more likelihood that they'll understand your awkwardness and admire your weirdness. I said earlier that I had gone to a few house parties and actually enjoyed myself for the first time. I think the best way to show why is this anecdote. I remember being in this circle of people standing around awkwardly silent and then someone said "I'm autistic and house parties make me uncomfortable can someone start talking?" and someone replied with how they felt the same way and how they felt the same way and then a conversation started about how hard parties are and social interactions in general but we were glad to be here and to try to connect with people.

And I love studying queer history a lot. Mostly because I'm curious how I would fit in to a time/culture in history. But also I love seeing how we don't fit in existed and how society understood our non-conformity. We have always existed. Queerness is part of the human condition.

The queer community is far from perfect. We all come from very different backgrounds and often have biases we need to work on. But, it's worth it to carve out your place in the community and to find people who understand and support you and to reciprocate for them. Because the alternative is being alone.

And we all deserve to feel loved, in whatever form you need. And because I'm feeling sentimental so here's a picture of me and my love 🥲

(Picture taken June 8th, 2024)

I have one last update before my surgery tomorrow where I'll look towards the future ✨

Next part

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#54: The Missed (1.06)

gif cred: @nerd4music

All those years without Richonne on my screen, they were dearly missed by me. And I love how after all those years Richonne spent apart, they now get to express how deeply they missed each other too.

Also, it was nice to realize that the regal Richonne bedroom location wouldn’t only be shown in the teaser as they revisit it several times throughout episode 6. And this first time they cut back to it is one of my favorites 🥰...

After Beale tells Rick that today is “a day completely about tomorrow.” in the briefing room, we get this lovely scene of Rick and Michonne resting in bed.

I like how the cut to this bed scene seems to imply that this moment with Michonne is what Rick is thinking about while in this meeting with Beale. I know now that Rick is back to his senses and fully intent on going home with her, the CRM can hardly keep his focus anymore. Because for Rick, now it’s just about handling business and finally heading home with his wife. 

gif cred: @ricksmarlene

On the bed, Michonne is facing away from Rick and I love that her wedding ring is visible on her finger. Also the way they were getting it on in that teaser, you know Michonne’s a little understandably tired. And I'm inclined to think she knows she has to rest facing away from him because they know how irresistible they are to each other - so if she faces him they’re surely going to be back up on each other. 😊

It’s really sweet seeing Rick rubbing her back with his thumb and then especially sweet is when he says another one of my favorite things he’s ever said as he tells Michonne, “I missed you so much. Words can’t even say it right.” 😭

gif cred: @nat111love

Since returning to himself and coming alive again Rick has got Michonne multiple gifts, got down on one knee with a ring, and expressed in several ways how much he loves her and can’t live without her, and yet he still feels like he hasn’t quite found the way to truly capture how much he’s missed her. 🥲

Rick Grimes’ heart will never fail to make my heart melt. He loves her so much. Just when you think that’s already been made clear, this love story goes and makes it even clearer. Also, the fact that he told Michonne she never has to thank him ever meanwhile he's still eager to search for all the ways to let her know how much he missed her. 😭

And I love that he’s telling Michonne this here after everything they’ve been through - telling her that while he was away, it was her that his heart ached for every day.

gif cred: @nat111love

(Side note: I was just thinking again about how it really does track with Rick's character that he would decide to die once he felt he'd lost Michonne for good in TOWL. Because even in TWD, a light turned off in Rick anytime he thought he lost Michonne. Rick's resilient spirit is not easy to break, but his will to fight and live always takes a major hit whenever he thinks Michonne has been taken from him. 🥺 Especially because to love someone as strongly as Rick and Michonne do means to grieve them just as strongly when they're taken from you.)

Another headcanon that I always envision is that at some point when they’re settled back home, Rick shares with Michonne just how close he came to permanently ending it all during his darkest moments in the CRM.

Like when he says 'words can’t even say it right' it makes me think that part of that is because it’s hard to fully convey the depths of despair he felt when he thought he’d never see her again. He movingly opened up about it in Episode 4, but when you love and feel as deeply as Rick does you know what he expressed in ep 4 probably still feels like the tip of the iceberg to him in capturing exactly how he felt while apart. 

But fortunately one of the longest standing elements of Richonne’s soulmatism is their interconnectedness. They feel what the other feels and understand each other without even having to explain, and so I adore that Michonne responds by saying, “You don’t have to. I know.” 😭

gif cred: @nat111love

She says it so tenderly and assuringly. I love that this is her response because it has layers to it. One; it’s freeing Rick from feeling like he even has to find the words because she already knows and trusts how much he missed her. I mean even just from every time he kisses her it’s more than clear.

It reminds me of their ily scene in season 8 when Rick tells Michonne he’s sorry and she says “You don’t have to be.” She’s always so understanding and so good at lifting away anything that could make Rick feel like he hasn’t done enough.

And then two; best of all is that Michonne is saying Rick doesn’t have to find the words because she missed him that much too. 🥺

She knows exactly what it felt like to have her heart ache for him everyday they were apart. I’m sure when she told Nat that she could feel Rick out there in ep 2, what she felt was the immense longing he was emitting and it felt akin to the immense longing within her. 

And once again, this reminds me of the Top 10 Richonne scene in TWD when Michonne tells Rick she knows he’s okay because she’s okay too. I love that since season 4, these two have always had this unique connection that allows them to know each other intimately and innately and share the same feelings at the same level.

So after all these years, how badly they missed each other doesn’t even have to be said because it’s something they both know and felt equally. 🥲

Then, after Rick and Michonne express that they know how deeply they’ve missed the other, Rick then wants to know another thing -  if they’re crazy lol.

gif cred: @nat111love

I love that he just asks outright, “Are we crazy?” And yes they absolutely are and we love them for it. 😌 I mean, one of the first things Richonne beautifully bonded over is that they interact with dead people. They have a lot going on in those minds of theirs.

Michonne knows they’re crazy too so I love that she answers, “Certifiable.”

I think Rick asks this here because he knows they’ve concocted a whole plan to essentially go right into the belly of the beast and expose the most powerful military on the planet as their quick stop before going home together. Just a short little homebound detour, ya know? 😋

Ordinary people would probably be too afraid to risk taking this on, but Richonne said...

Like forget 'go big or go home,' Richonne knows they're capable of going big and going home. And they were smart to devise a plan that's more of a secretive inside operation rather than attempt to start a whole war against the CRM or something.

I like how Michonne’s response shows she has embraced the crazy in both her and her husband, so she’s just calmly ready to go through with this plan. 

gif cred: @nat111love

When they say this, there are then several TWD clips shown of memorable Rick and Michonne moments. They show Rick when he killed Pete, Michonne when she tore the Governor up and left him with one eye, Rick leaping from the RV onto a Walker in The Day Will Come When You Won’t Be, and Michonne killing walkers with her katana on the beach.

These scenes were included to show that the two are in fact a bit off their rocker but to me, these clips really just emphasized why Rick and Michonne are the baddest to ever do it. 💁🏽‍♀️🔥

They cut back to Rick as he listens to Beale’s spiel - his thoughts clearly elsewhere and his crazy clearly bubbling up to the surface slowly but surely.

gif cred: @nerd4music

Then there’s a nice and ominous callback to the TWD pilot as Michonne finds a stuffed toy bunny lying in the middle of the floor.

A soldier can be seen carting in even more stuffed animals in the background which has a chilling element to it because it lets you know that somehow children are involved in whatever destruction the CRM has in store. 😰

gif cred: @nerd4music

It’s an interesting visual with these children’s toys contrasting the cold and sterile environment. And it also had me like...CRM, what exactly do y'all got planned because...

Michonne picks up the bunny, curious, and then hands it over to a soldier. Then I’m hit hard when she thinks about her kids and they show flashbacks of Michonne with Carl in Clear, Michonne and Rick running to get Carl to the infirmary in No Way Out, and Michonne being pregnant with RJ on that horrible day when Joycelyn and her Children of the Corn attacked her. 😖

There's also the great moment when Michonne and Judith took down walkers together with their swords, and when she had a family group hug with Judith and RJ during their beach day. 😭 Michonne with her babies never fails to warm my heart. It's such a reminder that she's come so far in her journey. 🥹

And to me, any viewers' claims that Michonne "didn't have an arc throughout the franchise" and was a "stagnant character" are easily disproven when you really pay attention to Michonne’s story. People are entitled to their opinions of course, and in my opinion, Michonne has such a moving arc in TWD and TOWL.

Some seem to think that because she’s been extremely competent since Day One that means she didn’t grow. But if anything, I've found it particularly impactful how Michonne's story explores the distinct growth journey of someone so competent and capable. Someone who could have easily just lived life as the "efficient weapon" but learned to put her walls down and also live life as a human being with plenty of multifaceted emotions expressed over the seasons.

Plus, while a lot of Michonne's early days of the apocalypse weren’t shown, she wasn't always okay mentally, having struggled to recover from the incredibly hard losses of her toddler, boyfriend, and refugee camp. 😔

We saw that she obviously took the losses extremely hard and went crazy carrying her dead boyfriend and friend around on leashes. Like, imagine if Rick carried Lori and Shane’s corpses around on a leash. It was a bit insane to have been carrying around the walker-version of people super close to her.

I believe I remember Michonne told Ezekiel that when she put Mike and his friend on leashes it was first and foremost to torment herself and punish them, and it was only secondary that she realized they actually had a practical use to shield her from other walkers as well. So it makes sense that Michonne previously acknowledged she was a “crazy lady with a sword” when she found team family. 

And for Michonne to go from the 'crazy' closed-off lone wolf that her trauma turned her into, to being a sound leader, adored wife, and cherished mother surrounded by the love of her family was truly beautiful to watch organically evolve over the years. 👌🏽

So then, after seeing clips of young Carl, Judith, and RJ, they land the Grimes kids montage with the absolute gut punch of seeing Rick and Michonne burying Carl. 💔

I’ll always be broken up over the wrongful death of Carl Grimes btw. He’s forever missed. And while Carl may be gone, he is certainly not forgotten by us or his parents...and that’s made fully evident as the TOWL finale goes on. 👌🏽🥲

[victoryverse]

i don’t know if you already did something like that but could you write about single dad simon with a daughter (around 4-5 years) introducing reader as simon’s new girlfriend and reader and simon’s daughter bond directly?🤍

sorry if my english is not that good, it’s not my native language🥲thank you

You are nervously standing at the front door of Simon Riley's house, dressed in your best outfit. You take a deep breath and knock on the door, your heart pounding in your chest. You have been dating Simon for a few months now and things have been going really well. But today is a big day - you are finally going to meet his daughter.

The door opens and Simon greets you with a warm smile. 'Hey, you made it,' he says, stepping aside to let you in.

You take a moment to compose yourself before stepping into the house. You are immediately greeted by the sound of laughter and giggles coming from the living room. Your heart melts at the sound, knowing that it's coming from Simon's daughter.

'Come on, I'll introduce you,' Simon says, leading you into the living room.

As you enter the room, your eyes immediately land on the most adorable little girl you have ever seen. She has long curly hair and bright eyes, just like her father. She is playing with some toys on the floor, but as soon as she sees Simon, she jumps up and runs over to him.

'Daddy!' she exclaims, wrapping her small arms around his legs.

'Hey, sweetie,' Simon says, bending down to hug her back. 'I want you to meet someone. This is Y/N, my girlfriend.'

The little girl looks up at you with curiosity in her eyes, and you can't help but smile at her. 'Hi, I'm Y/N,' you say, kneeling down to her level.

She looks at you for a moment before a smile spreads across her face. 'Hi, Y/N! I'm Lily,' she says, holding out her hand for you to shake.

You are taken aback by her manners and you can already tell that you are going to get along with her just fine. You shake her hand and she giggles, making your heart swell with happiness.

'Would you like to play with us, Y/N?' Lily asks, tugging on your hand.

You look up at Simon, who nods with a smile. 'Of course she can,' he says.

And just like that, you are welcomed into their little world. You spend the afternoon playing with Lily, building forts, and having a tea party with her stuffed animals. You can't help but notice how much she looks like Simon, not just in appearance but in her mannerisms as well. You can see why Simon is so proud of her.

As the evening approaches, Simon brings out some snacks and you all sit together on the couch, watching a movie. Lily snuggles up between the two of you, her head resting on your chest. You wrap your arm around her, feeling a sense of warmth and love that you have never experienced before.

'Y/N, can you come over again tomorrow?' Lily asks, looking up at you with pleading eyes.

You can't help but laugh at her eagerness. 'Of course, sweetie. I would love to come over again,' you say, giving her a gentle squeeze.

Lily's face lights up with joy and she cuddles closer to you. You can feel Simon's eyes on you and you look over at him, seeing the love and adoration in his gaze. You know in that moment that you are exactly where you are meant to be - in the arms of the man you love, with his beautiful daughter by your side.

As the night goes on, you and Lily bond even more, sharing stories and playing games together. When it's time for you to leave, Lily gives you a big hug, telling you that she can't wait to see you again. You promise her that you will be back soon and she gives you a big smile before running off to bed.

As you say goodbye to Simon, he pulls you in for a kiss and whispers, 'Thank you for being so amazing with Lily. I can see that you two are going to be great friends.'

You smile up at him, feeling grateful for this perfect little family that you have become a part of. And as you drive home, you can't help but think about all the future playdates, family dinners, and memories that you will make with Simon and Lily.

[hwaightme]

Yeosang who would rather stay alone in his hotel room to call you and hear your voice as he tries to sleep while the boys go live because he is homesick and only your voice can calm him and make him feel close to home 🥲💔

respectfully my heart is genuinely hurting because this reminded me of how yeo slept until quite late on a number of occasions... so imagine this is because he would call late into the night :(( to talk about nothing and everything... your voice being his clarity and his soothing, healing balm. a salvation in the midst of busy schedules and a chaotic day-to-day. you are the calm in the middle of the storm, a safe place.

songs:

everything everywhere always - elijah woods

when i c u - pomme

missing you today - public

we love yeo oh he is so sweet... thank you lovely <3 more thoughts below (506 wc.):

he knows that he is supposed to go live today. he knows that, at the end of the day, this is also his job, and he has to do it regardless of how he is feeling. but as the time ticks on and he feels nowhere closer to home, his mind is almost always elsewhere, and it has gotten to the point where he drifts off in conversation, is entirely absent while sat in the styling chair, and even the astonishingly bright skies appear dull.

thankfully, it does not take much convincing to get himself a late night free. misty-eyed and yearning for his home, yeosang simply has to smile and whisper "i'm tired," to voice the million thoughts spinning around in his head, and have a couple of his fellow members to take over, and an all-group live can be postponed until tomorrow. he feels like he has grown wings. soaring to his hotel room, he speeds through his routines and flops onto the bed to grab at his phone that has been charging on the nightstand.

as soon as he unlocks his phone, yeosang is met with a picture of you - a new one you must have sent a couple of hours ago while he was being interviewed. it was your suggestion to download the little widget that allows you both to send each other messages and photos that complete the homescreen with another piece of home. it was a suggestion that yeosang thanks the universe for.

one message. your response. another. your sweet words. a blissful grin settles on his beautiful features. his hand moves instinctively to the call button, and soon enough, there you are, home. who knew 'hello' could be so magical, and pixels on a screen so dear and so infinitely reassuring and full of love? yeosang waves to you, a little shy due to his sheer delight that he can finally spend some time with you, even though you are miles apart.

you sing praises, applaud him for his phenomenal achievements, cheerfully go over all the kindness you have seen and how much pride you feel, while yeosang melts into the pillows thinking that now, all of this is worth it. with you. he asks about what you have been up to, humming, nodding away as you transition from one topic to the next. when you least expect it, he asks one question, another, or amuses you with hilarious associations, be it to a trend or a song, or an inside joke.

he is happy with where he is, with what he has overcome and where he got you, but he is all the more happy that he can share this with you, and that no matter what, his heart is always home, in your loving arms. he imagines your embrace as he drifts off to you humming one of his favourite ballads. at least for a little bit, the time until he would be a metre, instead of a call, away from you, feels much shorter than before.

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

Let me tell you now, you're the lucky one

(Enemies to Enemies Who Fuck)

(HaruKaku in Bonten timeline)

(some past-MuSan and past-KakuIza with a subtle RanOmi bc why not, it's my fic and I don't have self-restrain when it comes to multishipping)

(link to ao3 in case some one preferes to read it there)

Warnings: Dead Dove: Do Not Eat!

All of them. Bonten is their own warning. Substance abuse. Really unhealthy coping mechanisms. Depression. Mental health problems. Suicide. Major character death. (it's Bonten, they all want to kill themselves and some of them succeed, okay?) Mentions of unsafe sex, but there is no smut or graphic depiction of it.

I tried to not be too graphic with any of this topics, the focus is mostly on what the characters are thinking/feeling. But it's hard anyway, tbh the last scene was actually difficult and painful for me to write. So please, don't take the CW lightly and prioritize your mental health!

Angst and Hurt/No Comfort.

MANGA SPOILERS!!!!

Notes: HaruKaku came as an hilarious idea. Because they are hilarious, let's be real. Soulmates archnemesis, doomed to hate each other in every timeline. But then Bonten happened and of course, I ended up writing some angsty shit instead of focusing in all the other moments when they are hilarious. Kudos for me, yey! 🥲

This is canon complicit (again, is Bonten, beware!)

It alternates from Kakucho's POV to Sanzu's POV. I did that thing again of using "Haruchiyo" when he's in his most vulnerable state because for some reason I like playing with his name like this.

(English is not my first language, be nice please 🙈)

(the art is from @just-sp-in-inginthevoid who is in part responsible for the archnemesis brain riot, but mostly the hilarious part, tbh)

Is not that Kakucho enjoys Sanzu's company. Or that the pinkette gradually started to grow on him. Quite the opposite, to be honest. He hates him a little bit more every day, every shared mission, every time they had to spent hours together.

But with Sanzu, he feels. He feels intensely, he feels with passion. Even if it's twisted, at least he's not empty anymore. The void that threatens to devour him seems to disappear when he's around the other man. Sometimes, Kakucho wants to murder him, but he knows he can't. Others, he wonders what would happen to him if he also loses the only person that it's still able to provoke an intense emotion on him.

Hate is better than apathy, isn't it?

They hate each other passionately. Sanzu finds his reactions too funny for stopping it, always willing to go a little further, to push Kakucho to the edge. It's too easy to pick on him, making him forget about his allegedly righteous patience.

It's disgusting, how Kakucho thinks of himself like he was better than the rest of them. So Sanzu enjoys to proves him wrong, to show him that they are the same (even if he can't stand that fact either, seeing that burning rage in those heterochromatic eyes makes it worth it).

Now that he thinks about it, it was probably a matter of time, considering that his king denied them the right to kill each other, they needed to find a way of releasing all that build up anger. That's probably why isn't that surprising when it finally happens.

It looked like a regular night. Sanzu was high as a kite, trying to forget every one of his lives. Kakucho just seemed to be there, he can't recall exactly why, some type of report, but he didn't pay any attention to it at the moment, too intoxicated for actually caring for something that could wait until tomorrow.

“Why are you still here? You like me that much or what?”

The pinkette man says, slurring his words.

“Are you that high? You know I hate you.”

Is the harsh answer that he earns. It's brutal, but real. Kakucho's honesty has something that grounds him to the present. It's sickening. It's exactly what he wants right now.

“I hate you too, don't worry.” He laughs, finding his own words amusing. “Think about it, me and you. Just us, hating each other all night long.”

“You're crazy.”

“And you didn't say no.”

(If he was more honest with himself, he would admit that he was trying to find another way of punishing his broken mind and his body. But he's not.)

And oh, it actually feels good. Kakucho fucks him with the same brutality that talks to him. He couldn't bear any type of gentle touch (specially not from someone that it's so linked to Mucho, but he isn't thinking in that, he promised himself to forget his old captain a long time ago).

There isn't any type of care between them, only spite. Both men are too broken for having the ability to love someone again. Indeed, this was precisely what he needed. This is perfect.

The next day, Kakucho feels nauseated. How couldn't he? Sanzu was high as fuck, too intoxicated to give proper consent to do anything. So even if he was also a little drunk, even if it wasn't his idea, Kakucho feels guilty for what happened.

Until Sanzu just laughs at his poorly attempt of apologizing, mocking his morals once more. He was about to punch him in the face, but the lingering guilt doesn't allow him to do it. Not that one more bruise would make a difference, actually.

Both are covered in so many marks that more than sex, it looks like they tried to kill each other. Yeah, maybe he should stop feeling sorry for Sanzu, considering this. Maybe that was the best way to get rid of that not-so-pent-up hate.

And it works. At least for a while, it works. Until it happens again. And again.

Is not that they are lovers (Kakucho wants to puke with that idea). They just fuck from time to time. That's all. They hate each other, they wish they could kill the other. But they can't. So, sometimes, they fuck.

Their relationship is not pretty. At all. Or better. If Kakucho had to use only one word for describing it, he would say “real”. They don't lie to each other, what would be the point? Both are too able of seeing between the lies, they are too similar in so many ways. But that raw honesty only makes it worse.

Kakucho knows it's a mistake, that he shouldn't care about Sanzu's fate (he brought it on himself and he doesn't seem to have any complains). But Mikey is worse every day, the king is falling and his loyal dog is falling with him. Kakucho needs to do something, because the uneasiness he feels every time he sees them is now living rent-free in his mind.

That's why, one day, Kakucho tries. He's trying to find his clothes, dressing quickly, wanting to get out of this room that only makes him feel sick. Then, he looks at Sanzu, his pink hair scattered on the pillows, a lazy and satisfied smile than only appears after sex (and never lasts). There is some twisted vulnerability in how content the other man is while lighting up a joint, as if seeing these new swelling (all this pain) on his skin was something he wanted.

(Kakucho can't shake the feeling that Sanzu is using him as another way of hurting himself and that infuriates him so fucking much... Maybe that's the real reason why he decides against his best judgment and opens his big mouth.)

“Is not worth it.”

“Uh?”

Sanzu looks at the other, not sure if he actually heard something. He just wants to smoke and relax, to feel the post-orgasmic satisfaction while it lasts, to enjoy the pain in his body (one more of his little punishments).

“I said is not worth it. Dying with Mikey.”

If it had been anyone else, Sanzu would shoot him in the face just for saying this. Thinking like that, talking like that about his king is treason. It should be. But it's difficult to pretend Kakucho's isn't right about this when, unfortunately, it's the only one Sanzu trusts with Mikey's well-being (It's the one he calls every time Mikey is being suicidal again).

“You wish you could be me, you wish you had died with Izana.”

Sanzu spits his words, burning with all the rage he feels every time he has to acknowledge the reality of how is Mikey.

“That's not what this is about-”

Kakucho is unable to finish his sentence, turning pale in anger when Sanzu cuts him. 'Good'.

“You're a selfish bastard, aren't you? You want me to be like you, stuck here with no purpose, jerking yourself with the memory of a ghost. Pretend it's because of your high morals, that you're worried about me or some other bullshit. But you're just another selfish bastard. And you envy me.”

If it had been anyone else, Sanzu would shoot him in the face. But he can't (he wants to, oh, he wants it so much, but he can't disobey Mikey's orders). So, instead of bullets, he uses his words.

“At least Izana cared about me.”

Is the last thing he hears before Kakucho slams the door. Sanzu laughs maniacally, throwing the first shit he can find to the place the other man was a few seconds a go. He's momentary satisfaction long forgotten, replaced only by hate (and pain, but one that he refuses to see).

The worst part is that in a sickening way, he trusts Kakucho. They don't lie to each other, that makes it so much worse, because both of them know that what the other said is true. He hates him, he hates him with every fiber of his body. He doesn't want this words to be true, he can't accept that. He needs to keep living in this denial, to pretend Mikey is fine (to pretend he doesn't keep mixing this Mikey with that in his nightmares, to pretend they don't look so alike).

It's been three days. Three whole days since Mikey's death was splattered on the news (no one seems to care about Takemichi's death, even with all that footage of how the hero tried to save the most dangerous man in Japan). Kakucho cares, but he knows damn well that he wouldn't be welcomed within the hero's friends, so he would have to say goodbye in his own way (again).

During this days, Kakucho learned some things, like the fact that apparently everyone had some kind of contingency plan in case this happened (no, for when this happened, all of them could see that Mikey was more on the edge every day). But nobody spoke to him about it, keeping him in the darkness, the only idiot that didn't prepare himself for the end. Well, not the only, he knows that, of course he knows that.

(Sanzu would have killed them in the blink of an eye. Anyone who dared to imply that Bonten needed to be prepared to function without a king.)

Kakucho understands the need for secrets, of course he does. The idea of Mikey falling would be considered treason a few days ago, it was taboo to think like that. At the same time, none of them wanted to acknowledge it, like saying it out loud would make it more real. He can't even be mad when the Haitanis (obviously) thought about him on their own schemes, making sure Kakucho was also safe. Or as safe as any of them could be now that Bonten was crumbleling.

It's been three days. Bonten is crumbleling. Mikey is dead. And Sanzu disappeared the same day. Everyone knows he's dead, but they don't say it. Not in front of Takeomi, who's still desperately looking, going out in the rain for hours. Trying to find something, some clue that leads him to his little brother. Clinging to the hope that he's still alive somewhere. That he's going to find him, high as fuck, but alive (Kakucho thinks being able to find Sanzu's body at all would already be a miracle).

Only Ran is able to convince Takeomi to rest a little bit, promising that he and Rindou will help with the search as long as the older man gets a few hours of sleep. Takeomi just nods, mumbling “Today is his birthday, Ran. Is his fucking birthday and he's out there alone.” while Ran drags him softly, a concerned look plastered in those violet eyes.

Kakucho hates it, hates having to see all this sorrow around him (again). He doesn't lament the loss of Mikey and Sanzu, he's incapable of doing it. Grief took his heart for hostage a long time ago, there is nothing more for him to mourn.

More than anything, Kakucho hates himself, because he's jealous of Sanzu. He knows he shouldn't, but he hates that the pinkette man was right about him. He envies Sanzu, who had the privilege of dying with Mikey, of dying with his king.

Kakucho hates the Mad Dog even more right now. But he's aware that once this hate fades away, he would feel empty again. So he clings onto this feeling, he needs this rage as a motor to keep moving.

It doesn't matter if this energy is fulled with rage, he needs it. He can't fail his friends, what's left of his family. Kakucho has to keep living even if he can't remember how being alive felt anymore. Even if he's more dead inside every day.

So, over and over... Kakucho would keep living.

The rain keeps pouring down without truce, Haruchiyo shrinks inside the leather jacket that was always too big for him. Now the only thing that makes him feel protected from that annoying rain (from the world). To be honest, he isn't completely aware how he managed to recover it from his penthouse, but it seemed important in that moment.

The jacket and the old picture that he's still clutching in his pocket, the only two things he cared enough to take. He doesn't even need to look at it to see the four happy smiles stained with watermelon juice. Two pink haired kids that could be confused by twins, one with a shy smile, the other with a cheerful one, happy to be included with his brother friends. Next, a fierce smile showing two small fangs, already a force of nature at his young age. In the middle, a blond kid with the most radiant smile Haruchiyo ever saw, capable of making everything shine just with his presence. Full of life, of dreams. Full of potential. Brighter than the sun, a true leader.

But that was a long time ago and, once again, Sanzu is the only one who remembers. The man staggering in the rain is now the only survivor from that photo. Only him, alone in this fuck up world where nothing and no one matters anymore. Not without Mikey. Even Bonten can burn from what he cares.

He keeps walking (it feels more like floating for him, floating in a cloud of pain and numbness at the same time). Until he finally reaches his destination, an abandoned bowling alley. Sanzu enters in some kind of trance, not sure if he's dissociating or too intoxicated. He doesn't care.

He sits down exactly in the same place his king sat down. How many days had passed since that moment? One? Two? Ages. It certainly feels like ages for him. Haruchiyo hugs himself, trying to make space for his legs inside the big comforting jacket. Completely curled up. And he cries, he cries like he hasn't allowed himself to do so in the last ten years.

He's starting to sober up, he can feel it. Because the flashbacks are coming back. Shinichiro jumping from that bridge. Mikey jumping from this exact building. Mikey falling from the stairs, that awful “clonk”. Mikey jumping again from this building.

Haruchiyo screams, holding his head with both hands, begging the images to stop, unable to continue reliving those memories. He needs everything to stop, to be quiet, his shattered mind can't take it anymore.

He takes out a small box from his pocket, looking at the content. Everything he needs is here, he knows how to do it, how to make sure he's not going to wake up from this trip. His stupid hands are shaking while he gets the syringe ready.

For some reason, he suddenly remembers Kakucho's words a few months ago. He hates it, he hates thinking in that fucker when he's about to die. But the other man was right, wasn't he? Mikey never cared about Sanzu, he spent years of his life trying to keep his king alive and it was all for nothing. Everything blew up in one night.

A manic laugh escapes between his whimpers. Of course is that, he's fucking jealous. Sanzu is fucking jealous because at least Kakucho got to held Izana's hand when he died, he got to comfort his king in his last moments. Sanzu didn't had that, Hanagaki was the one holding Mikey's hand. Always that cockroach, never him.

What did he expect anyway? Haruchiyo is just a failure. He never deserved to be the one making his king last moments less painful. Of course, he should had known. He failed everyone. He failed Shinichiro, unable to protect Mikey, to be the friend he promised he would be. He failed Mikey, watching him falling into the darkness, becoming the same empty shell he already saw in a past that never happened, and doing nothing about it.

Sanzu doesn't have anything left. He also killed his own chance of happiness a long time ago (he also failed his captain, didn't he?). The only thing left for him is to disappear, to follow his king. He's going with him, because he's being following Mikey for so long, that he doesn't see any other choice. He's going with him, because he doesn't deserve to keep living when he couldn't save Mikey.

But it's fine, the drug is already kicking in, his body feels more relaxed. Even his mind seems to be quiet, almost in peace. He looks at the old photo one last time, before drifting out of consciousness, looking for safety in the inner part of the leather, pretending it smells like cheesecake.

It's fine, because at the end of the day... Haruchiyo was just a failure.

[shai-manahan]

Hi! It's been a while since I've talked about the upcoming updates, but I finally had a chance to actually sit down and make plans! (the life of a corporate slave, am I right? 🙃)

It has something to do with the changes I will be implementing on my patreon, though. I've thought for a while how to give content that's worthwhile of subscriptions while also making sure I can be comfortable with them, and in all honesty, I had a tricky time doing it. HM is too personal for me, as I used to talk about before, and some of the patreon benefits I promised before eventually felt too revealing - of my own thoughts and people whose lives were a huge inspiration for this story.

I will be talking about these changes and the update schedules as well below the cut.

UPDATES

I aim to finish at least half of HM's Book 1 this year. It seems to be a more realistic goal than forcing myself to finish everything right away (which tbh may have been a huge pressure I put on myself the past few years), though admittedly, things are unpredictable in the field I'm in; my job is full of overtime hours, and I spend most of my weekends trying to recover (or sick).

Still, I gotta finish it one way or another, and it's not going to write itself (though I wish it would!), so yeah, set realistic deadlines, pull out a few all-nighters, and maybe I'll actually get through it, who knows?

I do hope I'll have steadier finances by the time Book 2 starts so I can put more focus on writing and have sufficient energy for it, but that's a conversation for another day.

Changes in Prologue - Chapter 2

Okay. I know I promised not to make revisions until I write more chapters, but changing how some game mechanics work and reworking the stats made it a necessity, and I underestimated how much rewriting I'd have to do. A few scenes ended up not working well anymore, and I couldn't resist from revising a few clunky sections while I was at it.

Dialogue options were one of those that were significantly affected by the stat changes, but no worries, nothing is changed in the story -- meaning Wesley still fucks with the Ripper's life (oops), Richard still goes off doing whatever non-sus thing he's doing, you can still punch Bale (it's even a lot funnier this time), Bertrand remains a bitchy cop, and you'll still have your sad flashback with your former best friend/lover/crush or whatever they are to your MC.

The plan is to release the updated version of Prologue and Chapter 1 to patrons by the end of March (I will have a few days off work that week) and release it to the public once the new content is also ready, which I presume will be available next month (I will keep you all posted but I really hope I can get it done by then because it's been forever 🥲).

I might tweak Chapter 2 a little so the available portion can stand on its own rather than be divided into two parts, because it's just too long lmfao and is harming the pacing as I keep worrying about the length. I'm also incorporating a few suggestions a few folks gave me these past few months.

Succeeding chapters

I've probably said this before but things are bound to get more insane in HM once we're past the first three to four chapters. But also quicker to write in a way. They're the kind of scenes I thrive in, and while they have bigger variations, they're a lot more fast-paced, characters start being manipulative little shits, and the threats are more prevalent than ever. Your Ripper will not have a good time, but I certainly will (I say as I look at my outline and get sad doing it). There will be a few "breaks" in between, but this is not and will never be a light-hearted story. Anyway, I'm inclined to believe I'll be more consistent with updates when that time comes, so bear with me for now :')

PATREON CHANGES

This is getting long, so I'll just list the updated tier benefits and end the day with it. I'll be posting a schedule that I will be committing to (here and on patreon tomorrow morning), with the below details as well (so if you wanna stop here that's totally valid) but for now, here's the tentative list:

Tier 1

Early access - 4 days before a public update (this month will be an exception and you'll get the update as soon as the other tiers get it, too).

Sneak peeks and deleted scenes - I included the latter because apparently I delete a lot of great scenes

Hints for future revelations in the story - the categories will depend on results of polls; the hints may be about Bale's death, about Ripper's family, Pharos, Cyro, the ROs themselves, or the nightmares that the MC is getting, etc. Might be in form of vague conversations/dialogues between unknown characters, might be me dropping subtle info about those involved. Either way, it will be fun :). The polls and these hints will be given monthly.

Tier 2

Early access - 1 week before a public update

all the other benefits for Tier 1

monthly RO snippets - I'm still experimenting with this, but I might simply write MC x RO snippets (with different kinds of MCs for different scenarios because I deeply hate writing blank slate MCs, sorry)

a choice to see the POV of a character, decided through polls, for every chapter/update.

Tier 3

Early access - as early as it's available and goes through testing stages

all other benefits for previous tiers

Non-RO short stories

Previews on unintroduced characters :)

That's all for tonight! I am so tired lmfao but I hope you all are having a great weekend so far! See you tomorrow :)

[noyaetnox]

HEARTSLABYUL HEADCANONS:

The series: DIASOMNIA / HEARTSLABYUL / OCTAVINELLE / POMEFIORE / SAVANACLAW

- will not confess no matter what and you can't tell me otherwise. He'll be bottling up all his emotions like there's no tomorrow

-> truly believes there is no chance you'll like him back. I mean, he was a bitch to you! He totally was rude and - how can you love someone like that?

-> Trey is slowly but surely getting tired of hearing the same thing over and over again from Riddle - goes to you, pleading to either confess or tell his house warden that you do not hold any special emotions towards him

- Riddle becomes much softer after you start dating

-> the whole of Heartslabyul noticed. Adeuce will be pleading with you to never leave their housewarden because suddenly living with him is doable

- Ace and Deuce will also react terribly to the news of you two dating (Ace worse), because what about that little shit made you like him? Are you okay? Were you bribed? Do you need help? Blink twice-

"You actually like him? For real? No cap?" Yes🤨? "But he's an annoying tyrant," jokes on you I'm a brat tamer 😋☝️ and into that shit.

-> will consider finally trying that therapy thing you keep talking about

- dates with Riddle are the best, you feel like royalty with how he treats you. Sometimes, though, he let's his tongue slip and says something he doesn't mean, but you can tell by his expression he doesn't mean it fr so you're fine (you then talk about it and he apologizes and you get lots of hugs)

- it is kept secret for the longest time, because he's worried people will see you as weakness of his (you totally are), so he tries. It fails. Bro has the biggest grin on his face the second he spots you. I'm talking visible hearts and sparkles

- no PDA. Won't even hold your hand. Please let me hold your hand 😔 will collar you if you pull something like holding hands or kiss his cheek, ONE OF THE SEVEN FORBID YOU KISS HIM ON THE LIPS IN PUBLIC -> immediate collar after each one - you're still into that shit (if you're not, are you really a Riddle simp? 🤨)

- doesn't know anything about relationships so his reactions are always fresh and amazing to look at

- can't communicate well and will try to not show his emotions (he fails horribly around you), so it's slow steps - both of you getting used to one another

- you tease him a lot, because he can turn redder than his hair and he hates it sometimes (he will refuse to admit), yet he knows you still remain respectful and once it's gone too far you immediately stop

- will try baking for you, but he takes everything literally (I'm pretty sure he is autistic, it's the fellow awtysm radar in me), so he often messes up. You eat it, because you love him (and it's not worse than Lilia's cooking, so)

- will spend holidays with you, he doesn't want to go home :( and he feels way better with you, so it's a win-win

-> only then learns about your living situation in Ramshackle 🥲🙏 will yell (respectfully) at Crowley because of it

- helps you so much with your workload by sharing his own hacks he's come up with over the years (he's the cutest little thing pls)

- fights everyone for you, except Floyd - you're both running from that one (will not leave you alone on that one, though, what a sweetheart)

- he's got a British accent 😐☝️

-> has the silly goofy speak: "riddle me this" "geezer" "bloody hell" "innit?" "lads"

-> you clown him for it sometimes, just sometimes. He hates it. But he also loves you so it's alright

- you carry candy around for him, everytime he gets angry around you, you toss him candy or something

- invites you horse riding (if you don't like horses IDC. I'm a horse person and I love it. The horse bedsheets stay on during sex 😡 jk. Or am I?)

- you will show him so much. So many new things and he's suddenly in this whole new world he's never been in before. He's willing to try anything, for both curiosity and your smile. Very interested in your world, please tell him everything

- will spend time with you in private tea parties where you guys just gossip

- platonic: best friends. Besties. Will share so much tea on tea parties, about everyone, even people you guys don't know. It's so fun. It's a whole 😗💅 friendship. (Though Riddle doesn't know much gossip, it's fine, he will remember what you tell him)

- I don't know much about this guy but I will try

- definitely bakes you sweets that are to your taste, if you don't like sweets he will cook. He's been preparing for this moment his whole life let him do his thing

- is afraid of blood. IDC. You get a cut and bro is freaking out, you're going to die while he's passed out because of the bloo- he is now gone 😔

- that said, loves taking care of you as long as it's not a bloody injury. Brings you blankets, cooks you soup, boils you tea, you name it

- teeth brushing together and I also mean the kind where he brushes yours, he says it's not kinky but you are not really sure

- doesn't know how to say no but is a master at leaving situations, like you don't even know how and your request with going idk where has turned into rule 8289402917364829 to not speak to people in glasses on a Thursday and now you have to compensate by eating his tart,,, or something

- 😏 <- why does he actually make that face

- you spend time together by having either little tea parties or just hanging out in his room

- his love language is baking, but I also think it's quality time

-> will ask you to join him in the kitchen while he bakes, to be next to him while he's studying and things like that

-> just loves having you close to him

-> ALSO ALSO: one of those friends/bfs that will force you into calling/messaging once you've arrived home, telling you to dress warm, buys you food, yells at Crowley for you (tells Riddle to yell at him because he was raised to respect others while he knows Riddle will not care - after all, Riddle likes you, too)

- walks you to school

- asks you to put Ace and Deuce into their place because he just might snap anytime soon and despite being afraid of blood, it will be the last thing a few of the Heartslabyul students will see ☺️

- doesn't have bad memory per se, but often forgets trivial things

- it's kinda endearing

- platonic: joins you and Riddle in your tea parties (tea in both senses), knows about everything that's going on in the school, all the gossip (Cater is the one who tells him, but anyway)

- "You don't have a magicam account😨😰?" "Wdym Crowley doesn't allow you to use your phone for social media and entertainment?!" Suddenly you are allowed to set an account 🤨

- EVERYTHING about your relationship is documented. He doesn't post all of the pictures and videos he has, but he posts a few.

-> likes to keep your relationship matters somewhat private rather than just post it all, it's for him only (and for you when he decided to finally send the pics from the date 2 months ago 😒)

- has a weird sense of humor you can't always understand. He seems like he's having fun, though, so it's fine, let him be excited

- he copes with internal conflict by occupying his mind with social media (twinss except I do that with games,,, anyway), telling jokes and being very unserious but he let's this mask fall whenever he's around you

- the actual Cater is so lovely 😔 he may not be as full of energy and as loud but he's still the biggest sweetheart

- you put him at a high place, whilst he puts everyone above him and is used to people just disregarding him, so when you show up and try your hardest to focus on him he just wants to cry for days on end. His opinions matter to you and you always listen to him even when he's talking about the stuff you have no idea about 🥲

-> late night crying sessions together (crying brings people closer), and you just love spending every second together

- he definitely needs assurance, so don't forget to text him a "good morning, love" a "goodnight, love" as well as words of affirmation and reminding him that you love him and him only and that he's amazing. Also please don't ignore his messages 😔 he will think you hate him

- refuses to get drunk in front of other people because he could start spilling his secrets, but he does when he's with you = crying a lot

- dates are two kinds:

1. you go to a very aesthetic location, you have a picture perfect (intended) date, it is later all over your social media

2. just you and him being in love and spending alone time together. His room, your room, in the garden, cooking together, you name it. All he cares about is you (only takes candid photos yet they look so good??? Sir??)

- just two people foolishly in love, that's it, that's the tweet (Tumblr post?)

-I really think he'd be one of the best bfs, hands down

- he writes fanfiction. "But, Noya, there's no way he-" ☝️😐 he does. I was thinking about Sebek writing FFs about Malleus, but Sebek doesn't seem like the type (Sebek for sure daydreams), but Deuce? He does. With Ace. They just share FFs and recommendations (he still doesn't know how to tell Ace he doesn't really write well)

-> tried to keep it a secret until you one day mentioned this cool fanfic you've read the night before with your favorite character

-> "you read fanfiction?😨" Yes, Deuce. "And you mentioned it to me so casually?" You lovable idiot

- thinks you are very cool and respects you greatly

- you have a group chat with him and his mom as well as a private chat with her

- the group chat is just the sweetest thing ever. His mom loves you and you love her, and Deuce is just there to observe and for the two of you to poke fun at (in an endearing way - talking sweetly about Deuce while he reads it all)

-> in the private chat, you're gossiping and having the best time of your life. His mom is so cool and such a girlboss (not to mention a total MILF - if it doesn't work out with Deuce you'll go for his mom 😔)

- that said, Deuce is very submissive and breedable

I will not elaborate

- dates with him are definitely outside, you either go for a walk, for a ride, or something like that

- brings you gifts all the time, they're mostly really stupid, but he's always like: "I saw this and it reminded me of you" or "I saw this and thought you might like it" your room is getting full, but you can't say no to that face.

- kiss his hair, he's sitting down and you do a little smooch, or the back of his neck

-> he gets all red and stuttering and then you hear it about it from his mom

-> "When will I get grandbabies?" Miss I want your child 😌☝️

- ehm

- just the loveliest puppy love, with a lot of hugs and kisses, he also doesn't care about where you two are and PDA is no problem for him (as long as it's like a little, he wouldn't straight out makeout with you,,, maybe)

- soft boy, will worry about everything but you and his mom will reassure him at all times, so we're good 😌

- BOY

- okay I ended Deuce with PDA and I'm going to start with it here

-> PDA all the way, will makeout at the lockers, near friends, he doesn't care. You do? Too bad (just kidding he will actually respect your opinion, but you also have to respect his so like)

- will bring you to his room while Deuce is there just for the laughs

- will try to protect you from trouble, because he has this feeling of needing to protect you

- "This one is for you, babygirl" and then misses his shot at club, you laugh,,, but why does he keep doing that when it has worked like twice so far (Floyd also tells you all his shots are for you and doesn't miss)

- screams when in distress, you scream with him. Yes we're fine, Jack.

- steals tarts and cakes from the dorm kitchen and then sneaks into your room to eat with you, then acts oh so sad when Riddle collars him and he has to go sleep at Ramshackle 😩😩😩 oh woe is me (sneaky bastard)

- you definitely curse at one another, jokingly, you call him a dick, he calls you a bitch. But you're his bitch and he's your dick 🫶

- people are concerned, but you guys are fine

- talks about his exes sometimes and then realizes his mistake and keeps apologizing for days, you tell him it's fine (you've already had the talk, and you know his mouth just runs faster than his brain can keep up - you do say if something he said hurt you and he then tries to make it up and not repeat it ever again)

- dates are never the same, like I can't stress enough how your dates are just in the spur of the moment and you end up eating bananas on Crowley's window (you almost fell to your death so that was the last time you did that)

-> has a weird habit of remembering things like that, like if you cut yourself - never be close to a knife, if you slipped on ice - not going outside when it's freezing, you almost fell from that window - never let you be higher than a chair when he's around. It's sweet, but let me live my life goddamn

- while texting he has started putting /j after everything just to make sure you don't misunderstand

- it's an emotional rollercoaster with him, but you somehow still return, is that okay? Not necessarily, but you love him too much and he loves you, too

- tells you often, that he loves you. Like, any change he gets, he will be saying "I love you" "Love you" it's kinda cute because depsite that, he still gets nervous and all red, at least you know it's genuine

- will beat up anyone for you (with Deuce because they're a buy one get one free, or frequently bought together)

-> you got used to your dates sometimes being with Deuce, but it's fine, you spend all the time together anyway (Epel hates your love, so you tease him on purpose, Jack is just lovable and is happy for you guys - just don't let it distract you from your studies!)

Why did Riddle get so much text? He's my favorite.

Why does Deuce have 2 banners? because he's my bbygirl and I couldn't decide, he looks great everywhere.

When will be the next part? With how life's going rn, soon.

Who will be in the next part? I haven't decided yet, but either Pomefiore or Octavinelle.

Have a great week everyone, hope life is going well, goodnight 🫶🫶🫶

[levok]

hi i just learn about martin and juanjo and now i want to know everything but i only speak english. is there somewhere to watch the show with english subs? also, do you have any posts that explain how the met and their relationship? i want to know but idk where to start!

Okay before I get into this (the best I can), let me warn you, it is quite the rabbit hole (but it’s the best rabbit hole)…

So there’s not anywhere official where you can watch the show with subtitles, but there are a few TikToks who has subbed videos (search for juantin translations), and then there’s also people on twitter who translate or transcribe - rec: @ majosguide (translates) @ tauruus9 (transcribes a lot of clips in Spanish but easy to translate on twitter. And has also posted full days from the show).

So you obviously know about the show Operación Triunfo that started it all. Started late November last year and ran until mid February (they both made it to the finale). They met each other during the casting process (which was quite long), so everyone knew each other before the show officially started. It was live streamed on YouTube every day from morning to evening and I recommend you check out their YT channel as well - there’s a lot of clips and you can get quite far with auto subs. And watch their English lessons haha.

They kinda had a thing somewhat from the very beginning of the show, where they were obviously close and knowing the development also pretty evident that Martin was very into juanjo, and juanjo more hesitant (not rejecting per say, but hesitant). Point is juanjo was still closeted at the time and it’s quite a big deal to explore that site of yourself on full livestream.

They clearly got close during the castings and everyone is very much dying to know what happened during that time, we know from a talk on the show that Juanjo rejected Martin right before gala 0 (not knowing in what sense - Just Martin mentioning it) it's all very... Pls spill the tea!! this clip 👇

Lucas: About Juanjo last night (before the gala 0) , I turn around and see him with his cell phone crying his eyes out 🤣 Juanjo: I 👉🏼😭👈🏼 , I had to leave, I left the room and all because I was… Martin: That's when I told you… Juanjo: Yes Martin: And you rejected me 🙂

So as you know, it’s a singing contest, and they performed/got voted off every week. The teachers decided their songs/constellation every week, and on week 4 in mid dec Juanjo and Martin finally got a duo together (god only knows). They were already very close at that point but still not together. And that week where they rehearsed together were kinda all they needed. Their acting teacher Abril (we love her!!) helped them quite a lot here, and the clips from her classes are priceless. You need to watch them all! Juanjo was lowkey panicking about having to do such an emotional song with Martin to begin with… but after that week they performed that song together for funsies all the time.

Watch this TikTok playlist!!

They officially became a couple late December right before they went home for Christmas, and yes the rest is history. But so so much happened after the show ended as well, and continues to do so. Right now they are on the OT tour with their second last show tomorrow. It all wraps up on the 13th 🥲

Honestly they are the cheesiest rom com couple you will ever see. Beyond whatever you can imagine.

Their whole storyline/moments on the show. Juanjo being nervous about coming out, but his friends/family being the most supportive ever. Juanjo saving Martin from elimination. Them reaching the final together. Martin helping juanjo with his dance routine. Juanjo helping Martin with his singing techniques. Moving in together. Juanjo returning to his hometown like a prodigal son and being honored together with Martin. Them being featured in each others first music video. Juanjo surprising martin on his birthday and take him star watching. Martin landing a tv show with his biggest idols he has talked so much about dreaming to work with. Juanjo performing with his big idol that he has talked about being a dream of his. Them having their first stage kiss on pride day. Them proudly talking about each other at any given chance. Them doing the pride proclamation and fully embracing this role despite being so young. They are just so supportive of each other and the kindest humans. They never stop giving. .. The list goes on!

This was the briefest I could do. Always welcome in my DMs if there’s anything I can help with/clear up and its easier for you 🫶 this got so long I cannot be bothered to read what I wrote so I hope it makes sense.

Here's a million pics to compensate for the thesis length answer...

[sunsetno4]

My mind is still burnt out on art (I miss it so much. :( <33333) but at least it finally got over its general creativity bundle, so I finally got up the nerve to pick up Ortega again. The dye job still annoys me (so much!) buuuuut it looks barely noticeable in pictures so I’m still gonna have to live it. ✨

I started her mods too and after five rounds of trying to sculpt a chest, I think they look okay? ;;v;; I’m not a sculptor by any means but the shape looks pretty decent. I’m gonna try sanding them today and making a plan for her spine mods. Because I wanna make it neat! But I have limited skills with clay. So it’ll be interesting either way. 🥲

Also! I’m getting a new doll soon. Like maybe tomorrow. It’s from one of my local friends so it shouldn’t take long at all. I’m still playing with ideas but my thought is the head could work for either Deja or Themmy, which will be fun! The doll has a super cute + dark face-up that I actually really like and I think would fit Deja’s lowkey goth aesthetic really well. But we shall see when they arrive. Body won’t work for either but alas, that’s always gonna be a thing.

[certain-blue-eyes]

Cas wakes up in Dean's room in the bunker. Dean is sitting at one side of the bed and holds Castiel's hand. When Castiel stirs, Dean looks up. He looks very tired, but as soon as he sees the blue of Castiel's eyes again, his whole face lits up.

"Heya, Cas." Dean says and smiles.

"Hello, Dean." Cas answered in his deep voice and he can see that Dean began to shiver. "Dean-"

"Cas-" They say at the same time, and then they both laugh shortly. But it's over soon and a deep sadness comes back to Dean's eyes. By seeing that, Cas has to swallow twice as hard as usual. "Cas, buddy, we really need to talk about that goodbye. I mean, what the hell was that? You can't just say something big like you did there and then just disappear."

"Yes, Dean, maybe we need to talk about that goodbye but I have also a question?!" He looks at Dean. "Why am I back? The Empty said it would be final this time."

"What now, Cas? You don't think you deserve to be saved?!" Cas can see the tears in Dean's eyes. He tries to lighten the mood.

"Dean. You can't use my words against me." He tries to laugh but tears are running down Dean's face now. Dean swallows and then bends forward. He frames Cas's face with both of his hands. He goes a bit cross-eyed when he tries to look into Cas's eyes. Their mouths are only a few inches apart.

"Can do, you asshole. Can do." Dean whispers before closing the remaining space. When their lips meet it feels like all the fireworks of the world had gone up at the same time. It's all they ever wanted but it's also not enough. They kiss with hunger, need, passion and all inbetween. Until they need to break apart for air.

"Cas, I love you. Okay? But don't ever do a deal like that again. I can't live without you anymore." Dean says.

"Same goes for you." Cas says. "Seriously, Dean. I love you, you know that. But same goes for you. No dump deal, no reckless fights for you. Deal?" Cas has his hands around Dean's neck by now.

"Geez, Cas. Yes, we have a deal but can you stop talking now? And can we kiss more instead?" Dean's hands are in Cas's hair and when Cas nods, Dean stands up and moves from the chair onto the bed, sitting down on Cas's hips. They both sigh and Cas pulls Dean down so that he's completely covering his body.

Their lips meet in a similar way like before. They kiss like all the pent up tension needs to be released at once, like there is no tomorrow. Cas moves his hands down Dean's spine and then rests them on Dean's hips. He pulls Dean's down and pushes his own up. They both first moan and then laugh breathlessly.

"Cas, we still need to talk", Dean says and Cas nods.

"Sure, Dean. Later." Then he captures Dean's lips again.

When they wake up the next morning, they're sure, there are no fireworks left in the world for decades.

+++++ +++++ +++++ +++++ +++++ +++++ +++++

~ ~ written spontaneously and not betad; english isn't my first language; based on something Jensen and Misha said at JiB11

~ ~ @emotiodeano & @januke & @heller-cockles-truther thank you! 💚💙 you may know your parts. if not, please ask. 😉

~ ~ @parhelion-ava sorry, it took so long with the other one. 🥲 and sorry for possibly getting spoiled with this one. 🫣