#Fake murder

[theghostofdash]

highschool throwback

Fake blood

Andras the demon: do not summon under any circumstance (from my demon study series)

Posted: april 15 2018

[tastefulbean]

More nuzi stuff- may finish this later idk HDHDBSB

[3dogbones]

based on this I thought it fit good with them so skibidi rizz since mob mob mob mob mob mob 💥💥💥💥💥💯💯💯

[mourningsbane]

Been playing a lot of ClanGen recently, and decided to start a little blog documenting some of the outcomes! So here's my favorite local kit-hater, Bearface, with the orphaned kit he accidentally adopted. Whoops!

[canisalbus]

I LOVE your art!! especially the very specific ways to depict intimacy. It feels very real, it's so so tender but there is often that sheer layer of tension that makes me want to consume as much as your art as possible. I hope I'm not bothering ypu, but what's the porch of your two characters? I love them, I love their dynamic.

Aa thank you for your kind words! I'm glad you like my stuff :>

You probably mean my current main characters, Vasco (the golden floppy-eared dog) and Machete (the pointy white dog). They're a couple living in the late 16th century Italy, at the very end of the Renaissance era. Vasco comes from a wealthy noble background and has a career in politics. Machete is a catholic cardinal, and as a secretary of state he oversees Vatican's foreign politics. Due to their surroundings they have to keep their relationship strictly secret.

Vasco originates in and lives in Florence. Machete is originally from Sicily and lives in Rome. They first met in their late teens/early adulthood when they were both studying in Venice. They were best friends before their feelings deepened, but eventually they had to separate. Machete graduated and was ordained a priest as intended. Vasco dropped out and returned home, where his family pressured him into wedlock. He ended up in a lavender marriage with a lesbian noblewoman named Ludovica (the red and white spaniel), she also has her own partner (still unnamed). Vasco and Ludovica are close friends, they get along well and cover each others' backs, but their union is purely platonic.

Machete and Vasco reunited in their early thirties by random chance, largely because they both work in foreign relations, and quickly resumed where they left off. They don't live together and can only see each other intermittently. Usually it's Vasco who visits Machete in Rome under the guise of working as a Florentine ambassador, but sometimes Machete manages to find an excuse to travel to see Vasco as well. They stay together for over a decade, meeting in secret and maintaining regular correspondence when their duties keep them apart (and quietly come to regard each other as their spouse), until Machete gets assassinated in his early/mid fourties. Vasco lives to his seventies and dies of old age.

They also have a modern au, which works as a sort of a reincarnation situation. They get to be a couple openly, get married eventually and grow old together.

[pizzabox-box]

Ok we need a wholesome/silly AU idea after all the "Peppino gets fucked up" ones, so here's a sweet idea:

An AU where when Pizzahead shows Fake the video of the real Peppino, instead of going "Wow! The real Peppino! I need a piece of him so I can become real!", he goes "Wow! The real Peppino! I need to befriend him so that he can teach me how to be just like him!", so when Peppino gets to Fake's bossroom he's just being extremely nice and acting excited, which obviously confuses the fuck out of Peppino cus like why is there a clone of him and why is it being so sweet, but he's not complaining.

TL;DR: Fake decides that befriending Peppino would be way more efficient than killing/hurting him

BEHOLD! The fabled "Dead man walking AU" good ending!

All is good, they are best friends! :D

[inadequate-nefelibata]

Steve Martin and Martin Short as Charles Haden-Savage and Oliver Putnam ONLY MURDERS IN THE BUILDING (2021) S1.E10: "Open and Shut" | S4.E9: "Escape from Planet Klongo"

[hippydippydruid]

Actually I’m not ok with the fact that Timmy has seen his mother be replaced over and over again, and Everytime he saw the disdain she had for him grow because she kept becoming more like the ideal while he became less and less perfect because he’s human. And for the longest time he’s been the only person behaving like a human in his family because everyone else he loved has been replaced.

[whumblr]

I, too, like the trope 'forced to listen' with hearing agonising screams from the room at the other side of the cell block.

But I'd like to raise with:

Hearing a single gunshot followed by earth shattering silence from the room at the other side of the cell block.

[thefakehedgehogaroundhere]

let's go gambling

[sumechiayuu]

[cleocatrablossy]

She would be a haunted house kid in high school.

After this it was agreed that Mabel has to give some warning before she pops up after more practice so as to not give anyone a heart attack.

[izzystizzys]

“…I’m sorry, but I’m afraid I still don’t quite understand”, Fox says, for what must be the dozenth time that hour. His heartbeat pounds behind his eyes in an incessant drum of hurt, and his head aches with every breath like someone’s taken a rusty fork to the inside of his skull and raked his brain out. Fox’ eyes are beginning to burn the way they start doing around hour 80 of a shift, and he has to suppress the brief urge to check over his shoulder. Not even Stabby could come up with a ploy this contrived to make him sleep. Probably.

In front of him, General Grievous coughs awkwardly, long spindly durasteel limbs shivering with its force. “Certainly”, he vocalizes, in that deep, watery cadence. “For your glorious triumphs in battle, your awe-inspiring victory over me in close combat, and your undeniable warrior spirit, I accept you as my consort. I have proven my skills through the ritual capture, and thus, by Kaleesh custom, we are now wed, Commander Fox. I will honor you as my war-bride, and visit vengeance upon your enemies. I swear it to you.”

Expectantly, Grievous tilts his faceplate to the side, and Fox only just catches the suppression of the manic giggle that wants to escape him. Yeah, probably not Stabby - maybe a dying fever dream? Has the infected gash from that skirmish on the lower levels five rotations ago finally decided to end him? If so, it’s not fast enough for Fox’ tastes.

Here’s how it happened: Fox has no kriffing clue. All he knows is one moment an emergency alert tore him from precious Scream Closet time this morning, he went to rescue the Chancellor’s dumb ass again, and whoop, here he is on General Grievous’ ship with the war-criminal himself declaring them happily married. And eyeing him up and down like a piece of candy.

Why, Fox thinks, desperately, does this always have to happen to me?!

Chancellor’s still kidnapped, by the way. Fox has other priorities for the time being.

“I swear to aim my weapons in your service”, Grievous continues, when it becomes exceedingly clear Fox is not going to break out of his shocked stupor anytime soon. “I swear to aim true and strike with murderous intent, I swear to uphold the sacred bonds of our clans in the name of our union, I swear to raise a strong, bloodthirsty brood of warriors with-“

“Wait”, Fox interrupts, once his brain has caught up past the astromech dial-up sound it seems to be playing on repeat. “Uphold clan bonds? You murder your way through my brothers like a rabid nexu on spice on the regular!”

Grievous’ faceplate, which should be for all intents and purposes totally expressionless, does something that reminds Fox strangely of contrition. It has him gaping and shivering in discomfort, in any case. “A fact I regret, but acknowledge lies in my past before the fateful crossing of our paths. I am a warrior at soul, you must understand, my worthy mate.” Durasteel faceplates don’t turn soft. They don’t. And coughs don’t sound loving. They simply do not. “But I uphold the bonds of these sacred vows under Kaleesh law, that I swear to you, my beloved.”

“All I did was grapple you to the ground”, Fox says, mourningly. “Cody has kicked you in the head dozens of times and you’ve never tried to marry him.”

“He is not you, and his battle lacks the lustful vitality and love of violence of yours”, Grievous declares, and Fox really cannot tell whether the sound that erupts from him is a lovelorn sigh or a hacking death-gurgle. This cannot be his life.

Just then, a droid conveniently enters, putting a pause to all Fox’ sufferings. He’ll need to tell Thorn to research Kaleesh divorce proceedings. Or, better yet - he needs to blow up this whole karking ship including himself and destroy all evidence of this ever happening.

“Generals Kenobi and Skywalker awaiting in custody, Sir”, says the droid, nervously. “They are here to rescue Chancellor Palpatine, but we cut them off just out of the hangar bay.”

Internally, Fox rolls his eyes so hard it hurts his brain. “The Jedi can wait”, Grievous hacks out, and for once Fox agrees with him. Let the two dick around onboard, there’s bigger issues at hand.

“But Sir”, says the droid, all twitchy with an anxiety Fox eternally wonders who the kriff programmed into the damn things, “what if they try to escape and -“

A deep, growling noise erupts from deep within Grievous’ massive metal chest, amplifying Fox’ pounding headache by a thousandfold. “I have no time for this”, he snarls at the cowering droid. “Remove yourself from my and mine beloved’s sight.”

“Roger Roger”, the B2 squeaks, hesitantly, before adding on - “The Chancellor-“

Harrumphing petulantly, Grievous stomps one massive, clawed foot and makes what feels like the whole viewdeck shake. “I will twist his head off his body like a rotten fruit”, he declares. “That will get those pesky Jedi off my ship faster, and then we can continue saying our vows.” He pauses, thoughtfully, and then hooded eyes ringed by what must surely be rotten flesh fix on Fox inexorably. “It will be my wedding gift to you, beloved, an offering of peace to your brothers.”

Fox opens his mouth to protest, but quickly snaps it shut again when his husband already turns tail and storms off.

Huh. Maybe this marriage thing isn’t all bad.

[rozahri]

nitro+chiral protags

[almostsweetangel]

what do you mean james somerton faked his suicide then got found out bc he posted his dick and balls

[amandamadeathing]

@reductress headline for Crosshair and his career choice.