#Faithe’s handiwork

[tears-that-heal]

Ephesians 2:10

[dwuerch-blog]

Real or an Illusion

Where in the world would you go to celebrate an anniversary? How about Boulder City, Nevada and seeing the Hoover Dam where it’s hot hot hot? But, when you have cousins who live there in a gorgeous home overlooking majestic mountains, the desert and Lake Mead, you welcome the blessing! Covered in sunscreen and being out in the desert’s hot, blistering sun, I can understand how seeing an oasis of…

[itsfarmerphil]

W8D4: Being outside of time and space, trusting God's handiwork.

Going into day 4 of week 8 and not seeing much movement, all I can do is trust in God. I know that His ways are better and higher than my ways and so I trust Him. His plans are for good and not for evil and so I trust Him. I know His timing is perfect and is my provider and so I trust Him. I consider the physical miracles He has and can perform being outside of time and space and am trying to…

[unviz]

We are wonderfully and thoughtfully made. Our existence has a purpose. We are intentionally created. It is not by accident or by chance that we exist or that we are where we are right now. He has prepared something for us. There is a purpose, a path, a plan, that the Lord has prepared for us before He breathe life unto us.

[nanaslutt]

entering zenin clan as toji's little trophy wife

contains: fem reader, established relationship, age gap (not specified), misogyny, naoya needs his own warning, voyeurism, masturbation, choking, rough sex, riding, dirty talk, cumming inside (toji has a vacectomy), Toji is a good husband, praise

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･°❀⋆.ೃ

Your large husband Toji stood in front of you, fastening the fabric around the kimono he had bought you for the special occasion. He himself was adorned in a dark blue kimono, the white fabric of the jupan peeking out from underneath the neckline of his kimono. He was wearing a pair of traditional setta sandals, you had never seen him look so formal and old-fashioned in your life.

"People really still wear this stuff?" You asked, watching him tie the light pink fabric in a bow that would rest on your hipline. Toji kept his eyes on his hands, working carefully, "You're making it too obvious you're not from a sorcerer family." He said, looking up under his dark eyelashes at you once he finished prettying you up. He took a step back, keeping his hands on your waist as he smoothed his hands down the sides of your hips, admiring his handiwork. A whistle from his lips made you blush, smiling up at the older man.

"Beautiful." He said, stepping up to you once again he pressed you against his chest, gripping his hands on the small of your waist he leaned down and kissed you softly, humming against your lips before pulling away. "Thank you Toji." You said, making the scar on his lip bend as a smirk graced his handsome features. "The geezers you're about to meet don't take kindly to.. women, they're old fashioned so do your best to stay close to me, not that I plan to leave you alone with them." Toji shivered internally thinking about what they would do to a pretty thing like you if he let you alone, not that he didn't have full faith in your skills, he knew you were strong, but he also knew how strong his family was.

"I figured out the old-fashioned part by the clothes, I guess misogyny just comes with that territory." You said lightly, making him huff out a laugh. "Don't take their words too seriously, especially Naoya, he respects me so It's hard to know if he'll say anything, but he's notorious for having a big fucking mouth." You watched Toji's expression while he spoke, a vein popping out under the skin of his forehead. "Especially with the women. I don't know if there's a single maid he hasn't harassed in some way or another." He said, growing irritated at the thought of him trying something with his wife.

"I can take it." You said, the soft touch of your fingers tracing Toji's cheek snapping him out of his annoying daydream, bringing him back to reality, his eyes shutting as he sighed, leaning into your touch. "We're just there for me to introduce myself, then we never have to see them again, right?" You asked, smiling when he cracked open his eyes and nodded at you. "What's the worst that can happen in a couple hours?" You spoke reassuringly. "You don't know my family." He sighed, covering your hand with his, pressing it harder agaisnt his face. "I wish I didn't either." His animosity made you smirk, he was working himself up too much.

"How did they even find out we got married?" You asked, Toji's hand dropping from your own as he stepped away to grab his phone on the table behind him and call for a ride. "Who fucking knows, they're so creepy they probably know your blood type and the time you were born by now." He mumbled, holding his phone up to his ear as it rang, reaching one of the drivers for the Zenin clan. You came up behind him, running your hands up his back, relishing in the feeling of the soft fabric of his kimono, before reaching his shoulders and massaging his shoulder gently as he spoke curtly to the man on the other side of the phone.

—

The two of you stepped out of the car, Toji first, taking your hand in his as you slid out after him, thanking the driver before you interlaced your arm in his. You were greeted by a kind-looking maid, she looked to be about ten years older than Toji, she bowed when the two of you approached. "Right this way Zenin." She said, glancing at the two of you before she raised her tired body and started a trail into the main building of the Zenin house. Toji cringed at the use of his last name, you felt his bicep tense when she uttered the word. You looked up at him, watching the muscles in his jaw flex as he repeatedly clenched his teeth together.

"I should be the one nervous." You whispered, receiving a glance from your husband, the shadow of a smile gracing his lips before he averted his gaze back in front of him, his eyes darting around to the familiar walls of his miserable childhood. "Being here makes me feel sick is all." He said. You absorbed his words, nodding to yourself as you looked forward, watching the fabric of the older woman's kimono crinkle on her back as she walked.

Toji had told you about his childhood before, but only the once; it was a sore subject after all. You knew it was a very toxic and abusive environment to grow up in, especially for Toji, as he was one to form his own opinions and morals, not letting anyone other than himself influence that; which his family did not appreciate in the slightest. "Here you are, please enter at your own pace." The woman spoke, looking Toji directly in the eyes and squinting before she bowed and walked away, following the hallway back the way you had just come down, presumably to complete some mundane task.

"She knows you, huh?" You asked, squeezing your arm tightly against his as the two of you stood feet from the massive sliding wooden doors that separated you from the main room, where his family was currently residing; chatter and laughter could be heard muffled through the thick wood. "That old dinosaur." Toji laughed quietly. "She was in charge of my main academic classes, would smack my hands with a ruler when I got an answer wrong, shit hurt." He said, you watched him smile, recalling the memory.

"And you're smiling?" You said, tilting your head confused. "Old hag was the only one who actually looked out for me in this hell hole." He said, shaking away the memory before looking down at you. "You ready sweetheart?" Toji asked, staring into your eyes fondly. When you nodded he leaned forward, pressing his plush lips to the top of your head before pulling back and taking a step forward, slipping his fingers into the inverted door handle he slid the door open, the loud grating of the wood announcing your arrival.

Immediately all chatter in the room stopped and all eyes were on you, not Toji, you. The aura in the room was suffocating, only a couple seconds in the presence of these men, and you had understood why Toji was acting so uncomfortable. They were strong, incredibly so, you could feel it. A man with long dark shaggy hair leaned back on the couch, his legs spread as he caressed his chin looking you up and down. You felt shivers crawl down your spine from his perverted gaze alone; his aura wasn't as strong as the others.

Continuing your scan around the room, your eyes landed on a younger-looking man with blonde- almost green hair, a brown halo of hair around his head, he gave you an incredulous look, man spread on the couch much like the last man, he had his arms crossed over his chest, his gaze focused on your chest, thankfully covered by the Kimono; and yet you still felt so exposed under his gaze.

Some other unmemorable men were scattered in the room, an old man with a high ponytail, a teen with short spiky hair, and a handful of longer hair wrapped in bandages behind his neck. One man stood out from the rest though, in terms of the sheer cursed energy radiating off of him, making you shiver, every hair on your body standing at attention. A silver-haired man, twice Toji's age, sat on the floor on a fancy-looking pillow in the center of the room, a half-empty whiskey bottle in his hand, his lips dripping the liquid. The man burped vulgarly, making you suppress a wince at the shameless action.

As much as his face alone looked perfect for the bottom of your foot, you knew this was a man who was absolutely not to be messed with. You guessed this was Nobito, Toji's uncle. "Toji tightened his arm around yours, keeping his gaze in front of him as you looked up through your lashes at him; he could feel your anxiety and was trying to silently tell you he was right there. Nobito laughed, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he raised to his feet, taking long strides toward you and your husband.

He stopped in front of you, ignoring Toji's presence completely. "Bagged a cute little woman, Toji." He laughed, looking at you when he spoke. You maintained composure, keeping eye contact with the wrinkled man in front of you, his breath reeked of alcohol. "Too bad she doesn't know her place." A voice interrupted. Toji's eyes looked to the voice, his face staying unexpressed, making eye contact with the source of the noise, Naoya. "Who does she think she is? Dumb woman doesn't know she should walk behind a man?" He said, scoffing, a look of disgust plastered on his face.

"When you get a wife, feel free to treat her however you like," Toji responded, deadpanning. "Insult my wife again, I'll cut out your tongue." Toji's deep asserting voice made you shiver, a heat creeping over your face at how he had defended you without a second thought. Naoya presented a toothy grin to Toji, a vein in his forehead popping out in annoyance. Suddenly it was too hard to breathe. "Now now, ten years of radio silence from you, and this is how you want our reunion to start?" Nobito tsked, keeping his face in front of yours but darting his eyes to meet Toji's.

"Nice to meet you, sir." You said, bowing respectfully, looking up at the old man under your lashes. He smiled, taking a couple steps back from you. "She's polite~" Another voice resounded through the room- the teen with the rat tail had spoken. "At least she can do something right," Naoya mumbled under his breath, the bitter words not being missed by Toji. You quickly reacted, squeezing your fingers into his arm to warn him not to do anything stupid. His nostrils flared on his otherwise blank face, his chest rising in a deep breath before leveling out again.

Nobito walked back to his seat and picked up the bottle of whiskey, grabbing a glass from the table in front of him he poured a generous amount before sitting and pushing the drink in your direction on the table. All their eyes were on the two of you, waiting for you to sit. Usually, you would sit down first, Toji making sure you were comfortable before sitting down next to you. In this setting, however, you weren't sure this was the best idea.

Unlacing your arm with his, you gestured towards the table with your hands before holding them in front of you, looking up at Toji. He paused, looking down at you before he started for the couch, you followed hot on his trail. Naoya smiled at this, not being able to shake the feeling that he had some influence on your actions. Toji held his hand out for you before you sat down. Placing your hand in his larger one, you sat next to him, your thighs touching with the proximity. He continued to hold your hand, placing tangled hands on your thigh as he gripped his over yours, enveloping it completely.

You pressed your knees together tightly, not wanting to reveal even a centimeter of your skin to the men around you if you could help it. Toji picked up the glass in front of him, bringing the caramel-colored liquid up to his lips before he was stopped by a hand grabbing his wrist. The shaggy-haired man had grabbed Toji, tsking, "Thats for your pretty little wife." He smiled maliciously, Nobito grinned, watching the interaction. "She doesn't drink." Toji was quick to retort, pushing though the grip on his wrist he tipped the glass into his lips, tasting the bitter liquid on his tongue before swallowing.

"You keepin' her pure?" Naoya's grating voice once again spoke. Toji was right, the man constantly had something to say, and none of it was good. "She even old enough to drink? Fuck, did you snatch up a young one?" He laughed, the sound making you cringe. "I can drink, I just choose not to." You responded, making the blonde-haired man's smile immediately flush off of his face as his gaze dropped to yours. "Why is your wife speaking right now?" He asked, the question directed at Toji, but his eyes were on yours.

"Only speak when you're being spoken to, and even then, make sure what you have to say is meaningful," Naoya instructed. You looked visibly taken aback. Oh he wanted to die huh?Toji thought, the vein in his forehead showing itself from under the skin. He swore he was going to come back here and strangle the man to death in his sleep, and he would enjoy every last second of it. Who the fuck was he to speak to you like that?

“I don’t tell her what to do, and you sure as hell won’t as long as I live either.” Toji growled, his grip tightening against your thigh. "Naoya." Another voice cut in before things could escalate. The man with the ponytail prevented Naoya from digging his grave deeper. Toji's eyes were glued to his younger cousins, his heartbeat racing in his chest as he tried to calm himself down.

You had no idea how much self-restraint Toji really had. Whenever a man even looked in your general direction you had to physically pull him back on his metaphorical leash so he didn't kill him on the street. He took a large gulp of the liquid once more, he couldn't tell if the bitterness was easing the angst he was feeling or increasing it. Naoya lost the glaring battle with Toji, scoffing as he looked away. "How old are you, Naoya?" Toji spoke, holding the glass of half-empty liquor on his thigh, spreading his legs. "Twenty-six." He replied.

Toji laughed curtly, raising his eyebrows before he released your hand and wrapped his arm around the back of the couch. "Don't you think It's time you find a wife? Or you been havin' some trouble findin' a woman who you don't have to beat to act like your dog?" Toji spat, making the younger man fume across the room. A snicker could be heard from the teenager to your left. You had to fight back your own smile, you're pretty sure you would get smacked upside the head by Naoya himself if you did.

“How did the two of you meet, dollface?” The man with the dark shaggy hair questioned you. Toji could obviously see you looked visibly uncomfortable at the nickname the man had used, squirming in your seat before your opened your mouth to speak, “Me and Dollface met through a mutual friend.” Toji interrupted, making the weight on your shoulders lift and dissipate into the air.

“Your friend know anymore cute young things like your wife here?” The man spoke again, directing his question to Toji but looking at the expanse of your covered body, they all did that and you hated it. “None that would be interested in an old pervert like you.” Toji responded, trying his best to laugh through the situation so his fist didn’t end up through someone’s stomach by the end of this.

"So, do you come from a sorcerer family?" Nobito interjected, taking a swig from the whiskey bottle. The questions never seemed to stop coming from every direction in the room. "No sir, I'm the only sorcerer in my family." You responded a couple chuckles could be heard throughout the room at your response. Naoya almost burst a blood vessel keeping what he really wanted to say at bay. Sure, you had a nice figure, and a pretty little face to match—but you were arrogant and had too much of your own personality. Naoya had an an inkling your relationship wasn’t as traditional as you were playing it out to be.

Toji deserved to be with someone who listened to him, who didn’t speak out of turn, who could actually walk behind a man. You must’ve been good in bed for Toji to have put a ring on your finger with all those flaws, he presumed.

"She's a first-grade sorcerer before you open your pathetic mouths again." Toji defended. You pressed your thighs together. He was so stoic and serious, it aroused you to no end, and the way he wasn't afraid to show you off, fuck it was doing things to you. Some “Ooh’s~” echoed through the room.

"Pretty and useful." The old man with the ponytail spoke. You averted your gaze to some corner of the room when you saw some nods throughout the room. "She cooks and cleans too?" Someone teased, creating more chuckles to emanate throughout the room. Toji clenched his jaw in annoyance. If his family knew that he did most of the cooking, he was sure at least 5 of them would have an aneurysm in this very room. At least he could be left alone without fear of starvation while he doubted these grown men knew how to cook something as simple as rice.

"When are you having a child? She doesn't look pregnant now." Naoya blurted out confused, his words indicating that the only thing a wife was good for was having children. You couldn't help but feel too aware of your own body at his words, realizing you could actually be perceived, and were actively being so in this moment. You kept quiet, looking up at Toji, waiting for his answer to come. Truthfully, you wanted kids with him at some point, but you were still so young. The two of you had talked about it briefly, at decided you would revisit the topic in a few years.

Toji brought his hand to wrap around the back of your shoulders, rubbing the skin there before he spoke. "She's too young to have kids now, maybe a few years," Toji answered curtly. Naoya looked flabbergasted, leaning forward on his elbows he spoke exasperatedly, "What? Nonsense, there's no such thing as too young to have kids-" barf. "Her eggs are going to be dried up in a couple years." His lackluster knowledge of a woman's body amused you, once again suppressing a laugh as you pretended to scratch the tip of your nose, hiding your mouth from view.

Toji picked up on your amusement, smiling before he spoke. "What would you know about a woman's body?" He challenged, sliding his hand across your shoulders to drop back down to your thigh, squeezing the fat through the fabric, making you feel a heat between your thighs. Naoya's lip curled up in annoyance, keeping his eyes on Toji's. "Let's take a break, yeah?" Nobito spoke, his voice coming out slurred. "We have a room for the two of you, dinner will be ready soon, we can catch and learn more about your little wife more then, hm?" he said, the words phrased as a suggestion but you knew it wasn't that.

"After you baby," Toji said, nodding his head at you. You smoothed your hands over your thighs as you stood, standing, you bowed before the men as Toji stood with you. "Nice to meet.. most of you." You said, licking your lips to conceal your grin as you started for the door. Toji smirked, making eye contact with Naoya's obviously irritated face before he wrapped his arm around your waist, his hand resting right above your ass as he let you out of the room, sliding the door shut behind the two of you.

"Well, that sure went!" you said, looking up at him and smiling through a cringe, making him laugh at your unfinished sentence, he knew exactly what you meant. "What you said at the end got me all worked up," Toji said, grabbing a handful of your ass as he started walking toward his old bedroom. "Huh?" You asked, confused. "No one talks back to that shitty guy, shoulda seen his face when you said that shit." Toji laughed. You caught on, realizing he was referring to your indirect jab at the blond-haired man before you left.

"Didn't realize bullying your family was one of your kinks." You teased, stopping in front of the doorway when Toji slid the door to his room open, holding his arm out atop the frame for you to go under. "You kiddin? Think it's higher up than my love for titty-fucking'" Toji teased, grabbing your hips as he followed you into the room. He shut the door with one hand behind him, before pulling you against his chest and pressing his lips to yours. "Sorry about those fuckin' assholes." Toji apologized, kissing the corner of your eye.

"It's not you who should be apologizing." You giggled, holding his face in your hands. "Plus, the way you were standing me up for me in there got me all wet." You leaned and whispered against his lips. "Yeah?" His deep voice whispered back, his breath tickling your lips as he hovered his mouth an arm hairs length away from yours. "Wanna see for yourself?" You asked, dropping one of your hands from his face to grab his wrist and bring it between the slit of your Kimono, under the jupan, so his large fingers were directly touching your damp panties. “Wanna hear how loud you can be for me, show these old fucks how good you take my dick.” Toji whispered, finally closing the distance and pressing your lips together.

—

In the other room, the men had not yet dispersed. Talking amongst themselves, they still collectively hung around in the main room. "She's a bold woman I'll give her that." The old man with the ponytail spoke with his arms crossed over his chest. Naoya fumed in his seat, his nose crinkling in disgust as he replayed your words over in his head. "Nice to meet... some of you." the fucking audacity. He was the heir to the Zenin clan, did you not know that? Talking to him like he's some trash, dumb woman.

"The only thing good about that noisy woman is her ass, what the hell does Toji see in her?" Naoya spoke, making Nobito laugh as he took another swig from the whiskey bottle, holding it by the neck. "She has a nice face, and she's undoubtedly strong if even Toji was willing to praise her like that in front of Nobito." The teen said, shrugging his shoulders. Naoya tsked, crossing his arms over one another, staring at some corner of the room angrily.

The locker room talk about your body and other discussions about you and Toji continued for a couple minutes before their talk was interrupted by a loud sound shrieking through the walls. The men raised their eyebrows, stopping all conversation as they waited to hear the sound again. "Agh!!" There it was again, the loud sound being muffled by the walls that separated them from the source. "The hell is that?" Naoya spoke first, his voice cutting into the otherwise silent room.

"Shh." Nobito hushed, setting the bottle down he scanned his eyes around the walls, waiting to see where the sound was coming from. "Ah-ah-ah!" He tilted his ear towards the direction of the sound when the moans came more steadily, his head tipping in the direction of where you and Toji were staying. Naoya was growing frustrated, already annoyed that his dad had hushed him in front of everyone. "Toji- Fuck-" That was all they needed to hear. Nobito let out a hearty laugh, as he raised to his feet, whiskey bottle in hand as he started for the sliding door that would take him to the garden.

Naoya's face was plastered with a blush, did you just-? "Fucking under Nobito's roof after being absent for a decade, heh~" The shaggy-haired man laughed. "He's marking his territory, bastard," Nobito spoke before sliding the door shut behind him, lounging on the edge of the deck. He thought you were eye candy, sure, but he didn't want to hear his nephew fucking his wife in front of him, he would rather be the one doing the fucking.

Toji's growls could be heard through the walls as he fucked into you, the sound of an old bed creaking through the walls was not missed by Naoya's ears. "Even her voice is cute." One of the men spoke. Naoya couldn't take this torture anymore, with his face completely flushed, he rose to his feet, walking quickly out of the room. "It's disgusting." Naoya spit, sliding the big wooden door loudly behind him.

Some maids were in the hallway gossiping when he exited. Giggling and covering their faces as they listened to Toji absolutely ruin your shit. His face burning hot as he leaned against the door, he glanced up at the women, "What the hell do you think you're doing? Get back to work." Naoya hissed, the woman immediately dispursing to finish their chores. He sighed when they were out of sight, finally looking down at his Kimono, he noticed a tent had formed at his crotch, he looked at it in disgust, scrunching his face up as he made quick work to his room, which coincidentally neighbored Toji's.

--

"You like that baby? Like when I fuck your tight little cunt like this? Toji groaned, gripping your hips as he brought your ass back to meet his thrusts, fucking his cock into your g-spot with pinpoint precision. "Y-yes Toji- Love it- love it so much!" You groaned. He had you face down, ass up, and his hips were being so fucking mean. Mercilessly he pulled his cock almost completely out, before bulling the entirety of his girth into your tight pussy, loud squelches filling the room at how wet you were.

"Yeah you do, take my cock-" thrust "so" thrust "fucking" thrust "well-!" He grit through his teeth, his hips colliding with your ass and making the fat ripple. He had only pushed your kimono up, revealing your pussy to him, he himself had only pulled his cock out through the slit, making it easier for him to get inside you faster after he briefly stretched you out on his fingers. "You're so pretty baby, fuck- such a good fucking wife-" He groaned, making a point to say that last part extra loud.

He didn't feel like he had anything to prove to his family, he knew how good you were to him, and how in love the two of you were. He just wanted to make them jealous, they were all old, ugly, and wifeless or had shells of women on their arms after all. He saw how they looked at you, how they tried to look through your Kimono and get even a sliver of skin to feast their eyes upon. He wanted them to know they would never, in a million years, get the chance, so here he was, fucking his lively young wife, bubbly and full of personality, in their prison of a home.

"Wanna ride me, baby? Let em' hear how good you fuck me?" He asked, not letting up his assault on your pussy. You drooled and whined into the sheets, gripping your nails into the expensive cloth as your body jerked and slid across the sheets from his manhandling. Riding Toji was a rare feat, it got him so worked up. The angle at which your pussy sucked in his cock, how deep he got, always made him relinquish control unconsciously, which is why it was so rare he let you ride him.

You nodded into the sheets, your words getting slurred together when you mumbled out "yesyesyes" while he fucked you. Toji laughed, pulling out his cock he continued to jerk it slowly, spreading your juiced all over him before he plopped on the bed next to you, holding your outer hip to pull you towards him as he got comfortable against the sheets. With shaky legs, you slung them over Toji's hips, watching him still jerk his cock in his large hand as you situated your pussy to hover right over his fat tip.

"Sit down baby, fuck me." He said the smile your husband had on his face being controlled by lust and love together. His eyes immediately rolled to the back of his head when you sat down on his cock, his abs clenching and legs twitching as you eased his length into you. "Fuuuuck, that's good~" He groned, tipping his head back into the pillows as your pussy swallowed up his cock to the hilt. He could feel every bump and ridge of your cock, your warmth, how fucking tight you were in this position--he already felt himself going dumb.

"Fuck me baby, bounce on my fucking cock-" Toji begged, his hands coming to grip your hips and aid you the best he could in lifting you off his cock and slamming you back down on it. "God~ Toji, you're f-filling me up!" You whined, starting a quick pace on him, pressing your hands against his pecs for stability as you gound your clit against his pelvis every time his cock bottomed out inside you. Toji had his eyebrows scrunched together, his jaw dropped open as he moaned freely into the room, his moans overshadowing yours.

"Y-yeah? Feel my b-big cock fuckin' up 'ur guts?" Toji laughed through a deep whine, trying to watch his length disappear into your pussy when you sat down on it, but he was having a hard time keeping his eyes forward in their sockets. "Yes, Toji- fuck!" You cried out when one of his hands came down to rub his thumb against your clit. The added stimulation made you ride him harder as you chased your orgasm. He loved touching your clit not only because it made you feel good and he loved seeing your reactions to it, but also because your pussy tightened up like it was trying to constrict his cock when he did so.

His body jerked forward every time his dick slid inside you, his deep voice laughing through his arousal when you stopped your bouncing and instead ground against him. The movements made his cock rub against your sweet spot deep inside you. He watched your head tip back as your nails dug into his chest at how good you were feeling. "Choke me baby, cmon~" Toji begged quietly into the air, needing to feel your smaller hand squeeze around his neck when you came.

One of your hands slid up the expanse of his chest, traveling over the fabric of the Kimono as you splayed your fingers out along his neck, giving him a squeeze. The smirk on his face grew tenfold, a dopey grin spreading across his features. "Yesyesyes baby- yesss-" His words were slurred, his eyes rolling back every time his cock was forced against your walls from your incessant humping along his pelvis.

"Baby I'm gonna cum-" You spoke breathlessly, squeezing your hand tighter around his throat as you were brought closer and closer to your high. Toji was getting dizzy, not just from you choking him out, but from watching you shut your eyes and hump yourself on his dick, getting yourself off on him like he was some sex toy--and he fucking loved it. "Yeah- use me baby, use me, cum all over my dick baby please~" He groaned, his jaw falling open and closed like a fish out of water, his eyebrows scrunching shut as he watched your orgasm crash over you.

Your hand around his neck loosened when you came, your orgasm wracking through your body as you jerked and twitched on top of him, your hips losing their rhythm. That was Toji's sign to take over. He abandoned his thumb on your clit and brought his hand back up to join the other in grabbing your waist. He planted his feet on the bed and started pistoning his hips against your ass like a madman. He fucked you through your orgasm and into overstimulation as he brought himself to his own high.

He watched you grit your teeth and squeeze your eyebrows together, pushing through the painful pleasure. "Almost there baby- doin' so good letting me use you like this- fuck-" He praised, shaking his head agaisnt the sheets as he watched your body bounce limply on top of him. Toji was too fucked out to announce before he came, but you knew. His hips lost their rhythm, his voice got higher and higher in pitch before he stilled his hips against your ass.

He groaned hard as he felt the first ropes of his cum shoot inside your pussy. He shot his body up and wrapped his arms around your torso, hiding his face in your neck as he bit down hard against the skin there, letting your cunt milk his balls as his hips stuttered agaisnt you, his cock releasing all of his seed as deep as he could into you. "Fuuuck-" He groaned against your skin when he started coming down from his high.

You pulled your head back, grabbing his face between your hands you pressed your lips to his, breathing heavily against his lips as the two of you kissed passionately. You pulled away, smiling at his flushed face, "Probably sounded like we just made a baby." you giggled, wiping the sweaty strands of his hair from his forehead. "If they ever find out I got a vasectomy, they might have a heart attack," Toji smirked, making you giggle as he peppered kisses on your face. "So maybe we should." He added, dropping his kisses to your neck as the two of you embraced each other, his softening cock still snug in your walls.

In the room over, a fuming Naoya sat on the edge of his bed, his jerking slowing over his softening cock, covered in his own cum as he tried to catch his breath, his chest rising and falling rapidly. "Fucking... bitch.." He whispered into the room, covering his ashamed face with the back of his arm as he flopped back agaisnt his sheets.

—

The two of you spent another hour cleaning up and enjoying each other's company as you sat outside of Toji's room, your back against the wall of the sliding glass door, Toji sitting in front of you, your clothed feet in his hands as he massaged them softly, listening to you speak. "You ready to leave, princess?" He asked when the conversation died down. You sighed, "I wish your family weren't such assholes, food always tastes better when it's free." Your husband gigged as you retracted your legs, pulling on your sandals as the two of you stood to your feet.

"I'll take you out tonight, you look so pretty in this after all, it would be a waste to not enjoy you out like this," Toji said, walking up to you and holding your waist in his hands as he gave you a one-over. You smiled, pressing a kiss to his lips before the two of you made your way back inside to say your goodbyes to the men of the household.

Entering the same room you met them all in before, they were all in their respective places, even Naoya. They all looked over at the two of you as the doorway slid open, Toji's hand on your waist. "We won't be staying for dinner, it's been awful, as always," Toji smirked, looking around the room but spending a little extra time on Nobito and Naoya. You smiled in faux politeness, the bright red bite mark on your next standing out like a sore thumb when you tipped your head to the side. "You think you can just use my home as some sex hotel, and leave?" Nobito asked incredulously, raising en eyebrow at Toji before taking a large swig of the alcohol. You silently prayed he would die in this moment of alcohol poisoning.

Naoya's face was bright red as he stared at the pair of you in disgust, his observant eyes picking up the bruises across Toji's neck from you stranging him in bed. "Watch us." You replied, which made a proud Toji Zenin look down at you and smile. The two of you backed up and shut the door behind you, leaving quickly without another word.

[ace-and-the-rpg-horrors]

it is so important to me that within the very last scene Monty appears, he is spoken to with kindness. and by Charles, of all people.

because the only person that Monty seems to have regularly known is Esther, and she treats him with anything but kindness. it's very safe to assume that Monty has presumably spent the vast majority of his life being berated, attacked and neglected by her. there has never been a moment that showed Monty receiving any sort of gentleness or tenderness from her. when Esther does compliment him, it's only to do with how good-looking she made him as a human. and that's her own handiwork. Monty himself is never praised, never acknowledged, never seen for any of his own efforts to assist her. yet, she was quick to both see and act the second he messed up, and not even through fault of his own.

it's so incredibly touching that Monty is finally praised for his own actions when we part ways with him. and by the very person he dislikes so much. Monty bitterly resents Charles. he's not shy about it. Charles is not unaware of it. he isn't all that fond of Monty himself. and yet, Charles is the one to end things on a positive note. it should be ironic, but it isn't at all. it makes complete sense.

of course it's Charles that Monty shares this final moment of his with. Charles is not an idiot, so i'm certain he could somewhat tell that Monty is a victim of abuse. the victim of an abusive parent-like figure, no less. just like him. Charles is rightly furious at what Monty has done, but how could he truly hate him? when he knows full well what it's like to be so scared of the person who's meant to look after you? when he knows full well that horrible feeling of being trapped without any escape in sight? Charles has also experienced being treat in a disgusting, violent manner for no reason at all. he may not have been serving an impossible-to-please witch like Monty is, but no matter how athletic, hard-working or friendly he was, Charles could never escape his father's terrifying anger, all efforts of his rendered futile.

it's interesting that Charles doesn't seem all that shocked in this moment, to see Monty act against Esther. he's glad, but i don't reckon his expression is one of surprise? it's almost as if Charles already had some sort of faith in Monty, even though the crow has given him absolutely no reason to trust him, quite the opposite. but maybe that's not so strange. Monty is like Charles. Charles is the person who outright said that he's desperate for people like him to be right, to be good. we saw how devastated he was when Brad and Hunter were not.

so, these words from Charles must have mattered to Monty greatly. people who are abused, especially by those who are meant to look after them, such as their parents, can often be led to believe that their abuser's actions are somehow "justified," even if it's not a thought they're fully conscious of. Monty isn't entirely naïve, at least outwardly. he clearly isn't under the impression that Esther actually cares for him, considering how bitterly he speaks to her. but deep down, there must be a reason he still stays with Esther, because he isn't restrained physically. Monty's cage is unlocked, he's "free" to fly around as he pleases, even shown to go outside at one point. he doesn't fly away from her, though. and that may be because he unconsciously feels that he owes Esther his complete loyalty.

but this moment could have changed that. if Charles, who Monty doesn't like and isn't liked by in return, who Monty was impolite and passive-aggressive to can speak to him kindly - what right does Esther, who Monty tries to be helpful to, have to treat him with such cruelty? what right does she have to scream at him, to grab him, to mutilate him? when he's done nothing but be her loyal familiar, having only committed the sin of feeling too much for her liking, human feelings that she forced upon him?

this scene is towards the end of the show for us. but for Monty, maybe it's a turning point in his life.

[cherrynflowergarden]

જ⁀➴ this is why we can't have nice things || matt sturniolo

sturniolo masterlist taglist

the kitchen smelled of ginger and cinnamon as matt stood at the counter, sleeves rolled up, carefully squeezing icing onto a gingerbread wall. she was beside him, painstakingly placing little candy decorations in a neat line.

“alright, what’s the plan here?” matt asked, glancing at the pile of candy she insisted on using. “we’re making a cute little house,” she said, voice laced with determination. “it’s a gingerbread mansion with the amount of candy you bought, darling.” he teased, smirking as he popped a gumdrop into his mouth.

before she could respond, chris barged into the kitchen, a can of pepsi in hand. “yo, what are you guys doing? trying to win a baking competition or something?”

“trying to build a house,” matt replied, emphasizing trying as the roof he’d just placed slid off.

chris laughed, leaning against the counter. “you need my expert advice?” “not unless you want icing in your hair,” matt shot back playfully, though there was a serious glint in his eyes.

nick appeared next, his curiosity piqued by the commotion. “what’s going on? oh, this is gonna collapse in like two seconds.”

“it’s not collapsing,” she protested, glaring at him as she added a little green wreath to the front door. “it’s going to be perfect.”

nick raised an eyebrow. “define perfect.”

“nick, go away,” matt muttered, though he was grinning now, caught between annoyance and amusement.

nick didn’t leave, of course. instead, he grabbed a piece of gingerbread from the “extra” pile and started munching. “i’m just saying, this isn’t very structurally sound.”

chris grabbed the icing bag from matt. “i’ll show you how it’s done.”

ten minutes later, the kitchen was a disaster zone. icing was everywhere—on the counter, on the floor, and somehow even in nick’s hair. candy was scattered like confetti, and the gingerbread house was leaning precariously to one side.

chris stood back, proudly admiring his handiwork. “i think it adds character.”

“you mean chaos,” nick muttered, wiping icing off his sleeve on chris’ shirt to which the later yelled about.

matt sighed, looking at the mess with his hands on his hips. then he turned to his girlfriend, a smirk tugging at his lips. “at least it’s better than the one they’d make on their own.”

“definitely,” she agreed, laughing as she swiped some icing onto matt’s cheek. “hey!” he grabbed a handful of flour and dusted it over her head in retaliation, making her squeal. nick and chris watched the madness unfold, both shaking their heads.

“this is why we can’t have nice things.” chris said, grinning.

an; heh the title doesn't match at all but it's okay :3 it's 24 dec for me so enjoy this little christmas gift from meeeee i have more ideas and i might just post them :)

tags; @eirianna @thebasicbiatch @katamcauley @wxnyzie @lilmear-blog @vrlixlia @star-fuck-off @embonbon @idkversace @annawilk @r0nnsblog @weluvwbb @c1ydessturniolo @vintagebishx @maddie-bell @timmdmdm @happydiplomatshepherdspy-blog @crispycitrus @faith-f1 @escapentropy @florscons @carlossainzwho @luckylampzonkland @lewisroscoelove @mudryklover @rageshots @dontworryaboutit007 @chair-things @myangelbaby555 @sheesh1311 @f1lovely @silia1raf @blahbel668 @my-dinos-life-is-good @ssturniolo92 @lilly6110 @lou-larcher5 @arminluvrr @mxryxmfooty @gabri3la-sturns @bellsboops @f1-and-shiz @emely9274 @starstrucktyrantinfluencer @kayla-hearts4sturniolo @unx100to @strnlslut

@mattslovergirlie @sarakpalsd @sweetobservationface @shadowthesim @mattslolita @cupiidk1lls @urloveanaa @t1llysblog @meatball10 @fiowerbeds

[cryptotheism]

When Saint Pierro of the Holy Defoliant was burned at the stake, he did so with a hymn on his lips. When the soldiers of the holy purgation came to Ipsod-3, they were rough in their handiwork. Such was their zeal for the destruction of inglorious text, that pitiful Pierro was caught among a throng of heretics, and condemned to the flame.

But Pierro was devout, and the violence of his love for the holy gun was nigh pure. A child of the primer quarries, stricken with the yellow lung for as long as he could speak, he had little but his faith, and the violence of his faith was greater for it.

When the flames caught his hair, it awoke in him a great rage, but also a great love. He pleaded with the footmen of the holy purgation to allow him the dignity of the bullet, but they refused, for they believed him inglorious.

As his flesh boiled, he sang hymnals, desperate for the indignity afforded to the final prophet. It is said that his voice was beautiful.

The Wills took notice of his extraordinary faith, and blessed his dolorous agony. For as St. Pierro of the Holy Defoliant burned, his voice remained pure. The fat of his body became holy napalm, which fell to the kindling and bolstered the flames, prolonging his martyrdom.

But his voice did not stop. As St. Pierro of the Holy Defoliant burned, his lungs remained untarnished, turning red, then silver, then purest gold as they sang their endless hymn.

In celebration of the birth of a new High Reliquary, the planet was purged, and a Mother Cathedral to the new High Order was constructed at the site of his martyrdom. At it's center, encased in a jeweled reliquary of purest brass and clear sapphire, above a great brazier of perfect obsidian, sits the still-breathing lungs of the Fifth Gun Saint.

[b1rds3ye]

Hi! Hello! I'm not sure if I can make a request, but if I can here's my request!

Can you do an LED mask reader who has a workshop underneath the base that the 141 doesn't know about (except Price, he approved it he just didn't tell the others, he didn't tell Shepherd too)

And when someone breaks something (like a gadget) they tell them to come to their workshop so they can fix it

It's okay if you don't do this! I just really like the idea :)

YES YES YES PLS THIS IS SO CUTE!! (Also PLEASE don't be afraid to invade my askbox, it's always open for brainrot, requests and the such~) Unfortunately I couldn't really incorporate the mask into this, just reader being a lil gremlin I hope that's okay 😭

The base has bunkers in case of an emergency and evacuation, but there are some passages and dead-ends that have become completely neglected. Price doesn't know how the hell you caught wind of those abandoned rooms but with his authority combined with Laswell's, they manage to allocate a space for you without the knowledge of any stuffy generals like Shepherd.

While it takes some months until anyone else in the 141 is invited to your underground workshop, they do know something is up. One minute you're around and then the next you've disappeared and unreachable (the first few weeks when you cleaned up the bunkers there was absolutely no signal underground). However they had enough faith in you and Price's lack of concern was signal enough to calm down.

It was only when Soap had come back from a mission, he could only groan in despair at his battered hardware. He's normally a clean demolitions expert, but a mission going south quicker than he could blink meant that his typical tools had succumbed to the explosions he set off. Unable to say no to Johnny's pout as he looked around at everyone like a kicked puppy, you eventually give him a reassuring pat on the back.

"See me downstairs, I'll fix it."

... what?

Johnny - as well as Gaz and Ghost who watched the exchange - just stare at you silently as you walk away. Downstairs? You mean the run down evacuation tunnels that are so run down and poorly maintained they're probably more of a death trap than whatever could be up above? But sure enough, you walk in the direction to one of the known entrances to the bunkers and they hastily chase after you (Price also following a little behind because he just knows this is going to be entertaining).

When they find you downstairs, even Price is in awe of what you've done with the place. It's filled with various forms of high-end tech. An impressive blend of both software running automatically on clean screens and gritty hardware that's sprawled across various workbenches and occasionally forgotten on the ground. There's only a singular hanging light at the center of the ceiling, but with a fresh bulb and the ambient light of all your other technology, the place is lit more than enough.

"Bloody hell..." Kyle pulls away from the rest of the 141 and joins you, his eyes following the curves and dips of a nearby piece of machinery he has never seen before but the general shape has him half convinced it's a bloody bomb.

"Like what you see?" You turn to the rest of the task force. You can't stop yourself from straightening your back in pride as the boys were clearly in awe of your handiwork.

"You were hiding this from us?" Simon asks. His voice always has a bite but you could tell that he was just stupefied, his question not just directed to you as he shoots a look to Price who stifles a smug smirk.

"We had some spare space," Price explains. "Thought it could use the renovation."

"Renovation? You rebuilt this from the ground up," Johnny exclaims, taking in the room as if it was a hidden hoard of treasures.

"Say, you'd let us pay you a visit down here, yeah?" Kyle turns back to you, eyes gleaming. The rest of the task force join in their own way. Johnny's nodding enthusiastically, John cocks an eyebrow at you, and even Simon tilts his head in curiosity, waiting for your next words.

"Hm..." you look away, bringing a finger to your chin and tapping it in contemplation. Eventually you let out a huff as you snatch Johnny's broken gear from his hands and start shooing them out. "I'll have to think about it. I'll get back to you in five to seven business days."

Johnny starts animatedly protesting but lets himself be pushed by you out of the door. Kyle laughs while Price hushes them all. Below all the commotion was an underlying understanding and agreement. You don't even need to say it aloud but they'll all certainly be crashing at your underground workshop and they were more than welcome to. In truth, as much as you loved having your private workshop, the only thing that could make it better was entrusting it with the dearest people in your lives.

Call of Duty Masterlist

[amalythea]

HIII ITS ME AGAIN MWAUAHHAHAHA

kaeya with prompts “stop moving, i'm almost done!” + “don't smile at me like that!”? maybe we're doing his makeup or something I'm a sucker for that

do your best to make me hate him too pls (I have faith that you will succeed, as always)

「 make-up 」

⤷ info: kaeya x gn!reader || fluff || wc: 450

⤷ warnings: kaeya teases reader, who is sitting on his lap

⤷ extra: HI HI IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG

“Stop moving, I’m almost done!” you huffed, the eyeliner pencil in your hand trembling slightly as Kaeya shifted beneath you.

He rested one arm lazily on the back of the chair, the other settling comfortably on your waist. His signature smirk tugged at his lips, and the glint in his eye betrayed his mischief. “I can’t help it when you’re sitting on my lap, darling. It’s hard to focus on anything else.”

You gave him a pointed look, leaning in closer to steady your hand. “Kaeya, if you don’t stay still, this will end in disaster, and I’m not fixing it.”

“Disaster?” he echoed, feigning offense. “You wound me. I trust your skills implicitly.”

Your sigh was sharp but fond, the warmth of his breath brushing your neck making it harder to concentrate. You steadied the pencil once more, your knees bracketing his hips as you tried to ignore the soft chuckle rumbling in his chest.

That chuckle turned into a full laugh when he caught sight of your determined expression. He grinned up at you, his single visible eye full of mirth.

And then, he smiled. That slow, lazy smile—the one that made your pulse quicken and your thoughts stutter.

“Don’t smile at me like that!” you snapped, your voice catching slightly as you pulled back to glare at him.

“Like what?” he asked, tilting his head, the very picture of innocence. Except for the hand on your waist, which tightened ever so slightly, pulling you an inch closer.

“Like you’re up to something,” you muttered, your cheeks warming. “And stop moving. I mean it this time.”

Kaeya sighed dramatically, resting his chin on your shoulder. “Fine, fine. I’m at your mercy.” He glanced up at you through his lashes. “Though, I must say, you look cute when you’re flustered.”

“Kaeya!”

He laughed again, the deep, velvety sound reverberating through you. But, to your surprise, he actually stayed still this time, letting you finish your work without further interruptions.

When you leaned back to inspect your handiwork, Kaeya shifted to catch a glimpse in the mirror. “Impressive,” he mused, dragging a finger along the edge of the eyeliner. “But do I look this good because of you, or do I naturally radiate charm?”

You rolled your eyes, but the smile tugging at your lips betrayed you. “You’re lucky I like you.”

He grinned, his hands sliding to your waist as he held you firmly in place. “Lucky, am I? No, my dear, I’d say I’m blessed.”

Before you could protest, he leaned in, pressing a quick kiss to your cheek. The smirk that followed was insufferable, but you couldn’t bring yourself to mind—not when it was Kaeya.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

@amalythea 2024. | do not re-upload, copy, translate, etc. my works on any form of media.

[andy-15-07]

Easter Joy

masterlist ! pairing Drew Starkey x reader

SUMMARY: Rafe and his wife, Y/n with their daughter celebrate Easter.

Outer Banks Masterlist

The warm spring sun bathed the Cameron household in a golden glow as Rafe and Y/n prepared for their Easter celebration. Their daughter, Lily, bounced around the living room, her excitement palpable as she eagerly awaited the festivities to come.

"Mommy, Daddy, when are we gonna hunt for Easter eggs?" Lily asked, her eyes sparkling with anticipation as she tugged on Y/n's hand.

"Soon, sweetie," Y/n replied with a smile, ruffling Lily's hair affectionately. "We just need to finish getting everything ready first."

Rafe chuckled as he watched the exchange, his heart swelling with love for his wife and daughter. "Looks like someone's eager to get her hands on some chocolate," he remarked, his voice filled with amusement.

Lily grinned mischievously, her eyes lighting up at the mention of sweets. "You know it, Daddy," she said, flashing him a toothy grin.

As they finished their preparations, Rafe and Y/n ushered Lily outside to begin the Easter egg hunt. The backyard was adorned with colorful decorations, the air filled with the sweet scent of freshly cut grass and blooming flowers.

"Alright, Lily, are you ready to find some eggs?" Y/n asked, kneeling down to her daughter's level as they surveyed the garden.

Lily nodded enthusiastically, her eyes wide with excitement as she scanned the yard for hidden treasures. "I'm ready, Mommy!" she exclaimed, bouncing on the balls of her feet.

With a laugh, Rafe and Y/n watched as Lily darted off into the garden, her laughter echoing in the crisp spring air. They followed close behind, their hearts filled with joy as they watched their daughter's excitement.

As Lily searched high and low for Easter eggs, Rafe and Y/n took a moment to soak in the beauty of the day. The sun cast long shadows across the garden, the sound of birdsong filling the air as they basked in the warmth of each other's company.

"This is perfect," Y/n said, her voice soft with emotion as she leaned into Rafe's side. "I couldn't ask for a better way to celebrate Easter."

Rafe nodded in agreement, his heart swelling with love for his wife and daughter. "I couldn't agree more," he replied, pressing a kiss to Y/n's forehead.

As they watched Lily race around the garden, her laughter ringing out like music, Rafe and Y/n felt a sense of gratitude wash over them. In that moment, surrounded by love and laughter, they knew that they were truly blessed.

As the afternoon wore on, Rafe and Y/n gathered with Lily to enjoy a festive Easter brunch. The table was adorned with an array of delicious treats, from fluffy pancakes to savory quiches and, of course, plenty of chocolate eggs.

As they feasted on the delicious spread, Rafe and Y/n couldn't help but marvel at the joy and laughter that filled the room. They shared stories and laughter, their hearts full of gratitude for the love and happiness that surrounded them.

After brunch, Rafe and Y/n led Lily in an Easter egg decorating activity, their hands covered in colorful paint as they laughed and joked with each other. Lily's face lit up with excitement as she carefully decorated each egg, her creativity on full display as she proudly showed off her handiwork.

As the day drew to a close, Rafe and Y/n gathered with Lily to reflect on the true meaning of Easter. They shared stories of faith and hope, their hearts filled with gratitude for the blessings they had received.

As they basked in the warmth of each other's company, Rafe and Y/n knew that they were surrounded by love and joy. And as they watched the sun set on another beautiful Easter day, they felt a sense of peace wash over them, knowing that their bond was unbreakable and their love was everlasting.

[rottenentity]

and god spoke not | postal

before the massacre, he sits alone in his decaying home, wrestling with his fractured mind and his fury toward a silent god. the walls whisper, his thoughts turn inward, and the darkness becomes a voice all its own.

contains: schizophrenia, introspection, suicide attempt (overdose), religious conflict & imagery, referenced self harm, crisis of faith

Dude’s body feels like it’s on fire. Not the cleansing, holy kind of fire you read about in sermons—the kind meant to purify, to burn away sin and leave something cleaner, something worthy, behind. No, this is different. This is the fire of rot, of decay. The kind that eats through wood and skin and bone and leaves nothing but ash.

He opens his eyes. It takes effort, like his lids are weighted down with lead, and the room around him swims in and out of focus. The carpet beneath him stinks of mildew and something worse—something coppery and sharp that makes his stomach churn.

He’s alive.

The thought hits him like a slap. He’s alive.

He doesn’t know why he thought it would work. Maybe he wanted to believe that a handful of pills and a bottle of whatever swill he could find under the sink would be enough to shut it all off. To silence the endless noise in his head. To drown out the static and the whispers and the screaming.

But here he is. On the floor of this filthy house. Alive.

His body feels like it’s been wrung out, shredded, broken into pieces and glued back together wrong. Every muscle, every bone screams in protest as he tries to move, as if his flesh is scolding him for trying to leave it behind. His throat burns, dry and raw, the taste of bile still clinging to his tongue.

He presses his cheek into the stained carpet, his skin sticking to it like wax, and stares at the ceiling. It stares back, blank and uncaring.

God is cruel.

He breathes in the stale, sour air of his shitty little house, and it feels like inhaling shards of glass. Each breath cuts a little deeper, the pain gnawing at his ribs, but he’s still alive. God didn’t let him go. Of course he didn’t.

Dude laughs, bitter and sharp, the sound grating against his ears. It’s not funny. Nothing is. He closes his eyes and pictures him up there, watching him from his throne or his cloud or wherever the fuck he sits. Does he laugh too? Does he smirk at his handiwork, at the pathetic mess of a man sprawled on the floor like roadkill?

Dude's hand brushes the chain around his neck, and he clutches at the cross hanging there, cold and sharp against his fingers. It’s heavier than it looks, or maybe he’s just that weak.

He believes in him. He does. How could he not? You don’t get this kind of pain without something divine pulling the strings.

He wonders sometimes. Is he just a man, or something more? Something less? Is he one of his children, or is he a god in his own right? He creates his suffering, after all. He is the architect of his own misery, the sculptor chiseling away at the marble of his life until there’s nothing left but rubble.

Or maybe he’s nothing. Just another piece of filth he lets fester on this Earth, waiting to be wiped away.

Dude sits up slowly, every joint in his body protesting the movement. His head pounds, a dull, relentless thud that echoes in his skull. The room tilts, and he clutches the edge of the counter to steady himself, his fingers digging into the cheap laminate.

Eventually, he made it to the kitchen. It’s silent except for the faint hum of the fridge, a sound so mundane it feels like an insult. He drags himself to it, his legs trembling with the effort, and yanks the door open.

Inside, there’s a single carton of milk. Nothing else.

He stares at it for a moment, then grabs it and pours himself a glass. The milk is warm, even though it was in the fridge, and sour, but he drinks it anyway, the taste coating his tongue like curdled regret.

He sits at the table, the chair creaking under his weight, and set the glass down next to the bible. Its cover is worn, the leather cracked and faded from years of use. He traces the gold lettering with his sinful finger, the name of the book a brand burned into his mind: Holy.

He flips it open, the pages soft and thin under his fingertips, and lets it fall to a random passage. His eyes skim the words, but they blur together, meaningless and distant.

Dude used to read it all the time, back when he thought it had answers. Back when he thought he had answers.

But now? Now it’s just paper and ink, a collection of stories that feel more like riddles, each one mocking him with its obscurity.

He takes another sip of milk, the taste making his stomach churn, and stares at the page in front of him. It’s from Psalms, he thinks. Something about deliverance.

Deliverance. What a joke.

If God delivers people, he must have skipped Dude’s address. Or maybe he left the package on the porch, and someone stole it before he got to it. Either way, he’s not here.

But Dude is.

Dude is here, in this house, in this body, in this pain. He is here, and he hates it.

He hates him, too. But he thinks he hates himself more. Because for all his questions, all his doubts, he keeps coming back to him. To this book. To this cross around his neck.

He doesn’t know if that makes him faithful or pathetic.

He closes the bible and leans back in the chair, staring at the cracked ceiling. The milk sits heavy in his stomach, a reminder that even when he tries to starve himself, he can’t escape the pull of survival.

God is everywhere. In the pages of the bible, in the chain around his neck, in the sour taste of milk on his tongue. He is in the air he breathes, in the ache of his bones, in the pounding of his head.

Dude can’t let go of him.

He sits there, the glass empty, the bible closed, and wonders how long it will take before he lets him die.

[walkswithmyfather]

John 5:16-19 (NASB1995). [16] “For this reason the Jews were persecuting Jesus, because He was doing these things on the Sabbath. [17] But He answered them, “My Father is working until now, and I Myself am working.” [18] For this reason therefore the Jews were seeking all the more to kill Him, because He not only was breaking the Sabbath, but also was calling God His own Father, making Himself equal with God. [19] Therefore Jesus answered and was saying to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, unless it is something He sees the Father doing; for whatever the Father does, these things the Son also does in like manner. ”

“God Is at Work” by In Touch Ministries:

“Be patient—God's timing is always perfect.”

“Throughout the Bible, we see God at work in people’s lives. Sometimes He acts in dramatic ways, as with the parting of the Red Sea. At other times it may appear as if He’s not taking any action. For example, Mary and Martha sent word that their brother was dying, but Jesus delayed coming to them (John 11:3-6).

Our Father has given us the Holy Spirit to help us recognize His presence and handiwork. The Spirit cultivates discernment in us so we can understand when and where He’s at work. We must also develop patience because God operates according to His timetable, not ours. After being promised numerous descendants, Abraham had to wait years before Sarah conceived, by which time they were both very old.

The Lord’s efforts can bring delight, as was the case when Hannah bore a child (1 Samuel 1:27-28; 1 Samuel 2:1). His plan can also lead through painful times, which was Joseph’s experience. Before the Lord elevated him to a position of authority, Joseph was sold into slavery and unjustly imprisoned.

We will be encouraged and strengthened in our faith when we recognize how the Lord is operating in and around us. These glimpses of His handiwork will motivate us to stay the course and help us maintain a godly perspective on life.”

[Photo thanks to Free Walking Tour Salzburg at Unsplash]

[kastlequill]

iii/v. unearth without a name: the parent forced to eat its young before it grows

pairing: keegan p russ x f!reader word count: 3.2k synopsis: the third time you hallucinate keegan tags: whumptober, psychological warfare, injury, electrocution, brainwashing, hallucinations, hurt no comfort, established relationship, ghost!reader, 4+1, no y/n warnings: canon-typical violence, torture ao3: read here ← prev | next →

III.

Things didn’t get much better from there. In fact, the torture only worsened. 

The passage of time remained a disorienting illusion at best, but you were certain that you’d been in this hellhole longer than the less-than-professional portion of your relationship with. . . 

With Keegan. 

It hurt to think about him. Well, it hurt to think about any of the Ghosts, men who you had seen as your crew, your family, but matters surrounding the sergeant in particular were infinitely more painful. They had each promised you one thing and one thing only: short of death, they would sooner lose a limb or two than abandon you. He, however, had gone a step further, all but vowing to follow you to the ends of the earth. 

Of course, Keegan hadn’t exactly said as much, for such a confessional manner of speaking was beyond his realm of expertise. Still, it was difficult to dispute the torch he carried for you when one took into account the way he slipped his treasured rations of dried jerky into your back pocket, or how he gave you his undivided attention both in the field and in the privacy of his own quarters. 

Anybody with a pair of workin’ eyes can puzzle you idiots out in five seconds flat , Merrick had said once. Makes the rest of us sick. Sick, I tell you. 

Unfortunately, reality was often disappointing. And you were starting to believe that the only person who’d ever been wholly honest about their intentions with you was Rorke. 

The day you first had this passing thought was the day you officially relinquished your already-slippery grip on sanity, mind finally at a loss. Because nobody of a sound mental state would consider their captor, interrogator, and torturer to be a pillar of truth or a beacon of honesty. Nevertheless, he wasn’t the one who had given you false hope, nor had he been the one to abandon you here, leaving you to waste away and rot. From the get-go, this monster of a man had detailed the exact terrors he would inflict upon you and then subsequently followed through on his words. 

A part of you—the worn-down, bone-weary, hollowed-out part of you—respected that. 

“Why don't we start the day off with a bang, hm?” Rorke strapped your wrists down to the arms of the wooden chair in which you currently sat. Giving a sharp tug, he tightened the restraints until a tingling numbness radiated throughout the meat of your fingers. “Get the blood flowin’, so to speak.”

In your peripheral, two Feds were hooking you up to some sort of death machine, which looked like an entanglement of wires and an array of dials. Malnourishment slowed your ability to assess and process new information, so you couldn’t muster the energy to investigate whatever damage they had planned for you. 

Resistance was futile; at this point, the pain was inevitable, and the suffering was unavoidable. You possessed no power, you had no leverage, and you were losing faith in your comrades fast. Combined, it was a sure recipe for disaster. Yet, you had no choice but to see all this chaos through until it’s likely-bloody conclusion. 

Rorke took a seat in a chair of his own, positioning himself just a few feet across from you. Close enough to intimidate, but not within kicking distance. To calm your racing heart, you focused your attention onto the deep scar that sliced his left brow and trailed the contours of his face before abruptly stopping at the edge of his jaw. 

Your sense of curiosity briefly flickered to life, and you wondered if it was the handiwork of another Ghost. Maybe Merrick, your methodical, war-horse of a captain? Or the Elias Walker, known to you only in the form of tales told by his remaining men?

Regardless, the image of the healed wound birthed in you a furious desire to bestow a matching mark on the unblemished side.   

“First order of business,” the ex-Ghost began. “The Walker boy. Logan. Is he back in it again, runnin’ amok with that sorry brother of his? Haven’t seen either of their ugly mugs in a while.”

During the previous winter, you’d learned some of the details surrounding Logan’s capture and escape, both of which had occurred prior to your recruitment. Keegan had always been pretty tight-lipped about the subject, usually dismissing it altogether by redirecting you to ask Logan personally. And so you had. 

What he divulged had sickened you to the core.

Although he wasn’t a big talker, Logan Walker had unveiled the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth in a series of short fragments over the course of several weeks. His recounts weren’t always delivered in chronological order, for he occasionally jumped around as trauma poured out of him like an unleashed dam. He had spoken of the isolation and the disorientation, of the physical beatings and the mental lashings. Of reliving his father’s death again and again, of the apparition of his brother shouldering him with the blame. 

The most harrowing part, however, had been the brainwashing. The manipulation of the mind and its contents, the rearrangement of orderly thoughts, beliefs, memories into a locked state of disorder. Forcing the self to become a foreign object in its own native vessel. You had thus far managed to avoid undergoing such disfiguration. Still, considering Logan’s experience mirrored yours almost exactly, it was safe to assume that you wouldn’t remain unscathed. But where his strength and sheer tenacity had foiled Rorke’s plans, you weren’t optimistic that you’d be able to replicate his success. 

Even so, no matter the evils lurking in your future, you scorned the prospect of willingly revealing any information that could be used to harm your teammates. Especially Logan. Dying would be less of a burden on your soul than condemning him to this hellscape for a second time. He’d already endured it once; to curse him twice would be beyond cruel. 

Perhaps you were a tad bit self-sacrificing. You ignored the bitter, unwelcome voice from within that questioned whether the Ghosts would do the same for you if the roles were reversed. 

Finally ready to reply, your head jerked to the left, then to the right. No.

A harsh exhale escaped his nostrils, like Rorke had expected the small defiance but was nonetheless disappointed. He snapped his fingers. 

“Wrong answer.”

To punctuate the detached statement, a sudden current of what could only be described as concentrated lightning flowed into you. Your nerves caught fire, and every single muscle housed inside of you responded by contracting painfully. The sensation caused your joints to lock, stunning you into submission. 

You felt your eyes roll back, but you willed them to refocus, threats all around. It was the sole method of motion still under your conscious control, for the rest of your body was seemingly trapped in an electric prison. However, when you glanced up at Rorke, a blurry figure to his left stole your attention instead. 

Brows furrowing, you blinked rapidly to wash away the hazy features you had grown to love, but the mirage of Keegan remained. You would’ve noticed the sharp sting of an injection, so, unlike the previous two instances, this particular hallucination hadn’t been induced by drugs. It was a break in the pattern. 

I’m going insane. Great. 

“I wouldn’t lie if I were you. We’ve got ways of verifying, y’see, so cut the shit.” A nasty, blood-curling grin spread across Rorke’s lips. His soulless vessel swelled with delight as he unleashed another cruel stream of words. “Those sons of bitches can’t be worth all this. You’re nothing to them. Nothing. They didn’t think twice ‘bout sendin’ you off to die an undignified death, alone, and yet you wanna protect them?”

He shook his head and clicked his tongue, the expression on his face morphing into a strange mix of disgust and pity. “What a damn waste.”

Another snap, another electric shock. Those two Federation technicians must have increased the number of amperes or the voltage, for this wave trumped the previous in its overwhelming intensity. 

God, you weren’t built for this. Sure, all the Ghosts had to undergo conditioning and interrogation training. But Merrick, Keegan, Hesh, and Logan had been navigating war and its unforgiving brutality for almost their entire lives. In contrast, you’d been a plain and ordinary civilian up until the moment Keegan dragged you out from beneath a pile of rubble not even three years ago. 

For your dauntless comrades, who had confronted and conquered Death many times over, a little electrocution was indeed light work. For you, however, it wasn’t so.

Perhaps an additional year of experience would’ve solidified this weakness into something ironclad. Keegan had been giving you private lessons after sunset in an attempt to speed the learning process along, but your capture had indefinitely suspended such sessions. Thus, here you would remain, unrefined and incomplete.

At present, clouding your vision with the view of your torturer was more preferable than seeing the resigned disappointment on your lover’s war-painted face.

“Y’know,” Rorke mused, “the Federation could use a soldier like you. Someone with your kind of loyalty.”

You temporarily forgot your vow of silence and gave a derisive snort. The loyalty you had for the Ghosts hadn’t been acquired through material means; no amount of promised money or power in the world had a chance of swaying you. Bonds born of bruises and blood were damn near impenetrable and immortal.  

That level of devotion couldn’t be fabricated or repurposed. 

“Now, now, there’s no need to look so sour.” He bared his teeth, donning a devilish smile. “We’ll have you singin’ a different tune soon enough.”

This is it, you thought. This is where things get ugly. 

As if the steaming pile of shit that Rorke had already dumped on you wasn’t bad enough. Still, objectively speaking, the brainwashing Logan had described would be leagues worse than even the most brutal torture you’d withstood yet. Because it wouldn’t just entail physical duress; your mental faculties would be taken hostage and subjected to radical change.

“We can do this the easy way, or the hard way,” he challenged, cocking a single brow. “Choice is yours. I’m partial to the hard way, myself.”

No answer left your lips, which was in and of itself an answer. One that elicited a sigh from Rorke and an eyebrow raise from Keegan.

“Hard way it is, then. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

You steeled yourself for a third wave of electrocution, but nothing could mitigate the calamity brought on by the hot coils that cascaded down your spine and traveled outward to your limbs and digits. It lasted for several seconds, minutes, hours. An eternity. 

To what limits did Rorke intend to push your mind and body? A muddled sanity and crippled form would be of no use to him, surely. So what did he hope to gain?

Probably nothing special. Some people just want to watch the world burn, Keegan had told you at the beginning of your acquaintance, not long after explosives had free-fallen from the sky.

And Rorke fell squarely into that category.

“How d’you think this ends? In walks a Ghost or two, and then off into the sunset you go, happily ever after?” He sneered. “Like hell.”

The wave of his hand brought on another current of heat lightning, setting your skin aflame. You clenched every possible muscle in your jaw as he ducked down to meet your unfocused stare. Upon making contact, your fatigued eyes fluttered shut to replace the image of him with total darkness. 

A fruitless endeavor, really. The hatred carried by his gaze and the imposing outline of his figure were both irreparably ingrained into the very grooves and folds of your brain. 

But despite how he haunted your sleep and consumed much of your waking thoughts, Rorke had miraculously failed to eradicate your willpower in its entirety. Still, he had failed to isolate and exploit your Achilles’ heel; still, he was ignorant to the fact that the root of your motivations surpassed standard camaraderie. It would thus take more effort on his part than electric torture to excavate said root.

You were not yet at your breaking point. And you refused to allow today to be the day you finally cracked underneath his reign of terror. 

For a moment, the pit was silent. Then came the dreadful murmur of his long-awaited epiphany. 

“Ah, I see what this is,” Rorke said, tone giddy and ominous. “Tell me, who’s the lucky guy? Which one’s got you actin’ all stupid?” 

Your heart stopped. 

Fuck.  

“Can’t be the quiet Walker, he doesn’t seem the romantic type. And it can’t be his mouthy brother either, too busy tryin’ to avenge the death of his old man. Merrick, well, the fella don’t really swing that way, if y’catch my drift. So, by my count, that just leaves. . .”

Heedless of your wishes, your lidded stare flicked to Keegan’s impassive face. Rorke hadn’t the faintest clue about the subject of your hallucinations or even about the fact that you were currently hallucinating. Nevertheless, the break in eye contact was sufficient evidence to betray you.   

His gaze narrowed. “Bingo.”

You forced yourself to refocus on the non-imaginary man across from you, but the damage had been done.  

“Keegan P. Russ, you sly sonuva bitch,” he muttered. Rorke pursed his lips and whistled in approval. “How’d he win you over? Did he call you pretty, say you’re special? Was he your knight in shining armor?”

In truth, Keegan hadn’t even needed to lift a finger to successfully woo you. Caring for him was as easy as breathing, and it had come so naturally to you that, without him, you felt a bit like a fish out of water. You couldn’t attribute this evolution of your relationship to a singular, specific instance; rather, an aggregation of stolen moments and intimate gestures had resulted in a mutual desire for more. But, to prevent whatever was mounting between yourselves from jeopardizing the team dynamic, the two of you had agreed to take things slow. 

Maybe too slow, in retrospect. This hush-hush, test-run of a relationship had lasted a mere couple months, terminated prematurely by the man who was currently trying to fry your brain. Now your time was up, and much of Keegan would remain a mystery to you, forever undiscovered and unsolved. Still, you couldn’t bring yourself to regret any of it. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to regret him. 

“Oh, this just keeps gettin’ better and better. I’m gonna have a whole lot of fun with you,” Rorke drawled, cracking his knuckles. A wave of apprehension washed over you, and he grinned at the horror that was surely etched into your face. “Don’t worry, I won’t kill our dear ol’ Russ.” 

Relief surged within you, rejuvenating some of our deadened spirit, but the feeling didn’t last long. Nothing remotely good ever did down here. 

“You will.”

Two little words, two little syllables shattered the illusion of Keegan, and with him went any remaining actionable hope. Try as you might, you were unable to reconjure his presence, incapable of reconstructing the facial features you had once loved to trace as he slept. Already, the pain had begun to distort his image in your mind’s eye, like how a digital photo album might be corrupted by malware. 

Perhaps it was for the best. Perhaps you should compartmentalize your memories of him, of the Ghosts, and of the resistance into tiny boxes, sealing them shut then storing them far, far away. Not just out of Rorke’s reach, but out of yours too.  

Because, ultimately, time was on the side of your enemies. Your body would erode first, followed by your sanity and ending with your soul; such was inevitable. Recognizing you were powerless to circumvent this fate, you instead sought to curate the information that would be revealed to Rorke once he finally penetrated your mental bastion. If you purged anything to do with the Ghosts from your memory bank, then the knowledge you possessed couldn’t be weaponized against them. 

The only way you could counteract Rorke’s plans was by forgetting the life you’d built alongside Keegan and the others. Even as you now sat tied up and riddled with convulsions, you were thinking about the four soldiers who had become your home, about how to protect them. Any strategizing you did was to discern a method of silent survival for their sake, not yours. Never yours.

You tried to stave off the bitterness that crept deeper into your heart. 

“Conserve your energy. You’ll be needin’ it for what I’ve got planned,” the older man advised, though his sinister chuckle contradicted any notion of good faith. The metal legs of his chair scraped against the ground as he pushed himself backwards and stood to his full height. “And it should go without saying—”

Rorke let the sentence break off and linger in the tense atmosphere. During these sessions, you’d learned that the older man had somewhat of a proclivity for theatrics. The ex-Ghost derived sick pleasure from randomly dropping bombs of intel on you to instigate a reaction, or from watching you struggle to persist in spite of the various mental and physical agonies he had inflicted. 

A true sadist.

“None of those sorry bastards are gonna barge in and save the day, so give that dream up already. You won’t be found. I mean, how’re they s'posed to find what they ain’t even lookin’ for?”

The sound of retreating footsteps meant Rorke had finally taken his leave, marking the conclusion of this interrogation. But, as the two remaining Feds prepared to conduct another bolt of electricity through your depreciating body, you knew that the prescribed torture had only just begun. 

You hung your head and stared unblinkingly at your bound wrists, at your traumatized fingers, still twitching from the aftershocks. Tremors born of fear, pain, rage. Rage at Rorke, at yourself. 

At Keegan. 

In a kinder world, perhaps Keegan would’ve been around to hold your hands in his, to soothe your scorched flesh with a gentle, mindless rub of his thumb. A fierce longing for him gripped your heart, yearning for that Keegan who could glean your emotional state at any given moment as informed by the mere hitch in your breath or the rhythm of your pulse. 

That Keegan, who let you crawl into his arms and steal his warmth on harsh winter nights, no questions asked. That Keegan, who caught the glazed-over look in your eyes whenever certain topics arose in conversation and thus tried to distract you by playing a game of I Spy, your favorite childhood pastime. That Keegan, who had once nearly broken a man’s wrist for daring to grab the collar of your shirt; he’d been the perfect picture of Death-incarnate, a fierce protector with his stone-cold warning and intimidating stare.

This Keegan, however, was all too different.

Because this Keegan did not come to your rescue. No, instead, he had left you here to die.

tbc.

[kale-theteaqueen]

Leap of Faith, Chapter 2: March 1944

---

“I have decorum, Captain Garcia, I am a lady.”

“I’m sure you are, Mrs. Mandray.”

Cassian turned, lifting the tea pot and unceremoniously pouring its contents into a cup. The hot water splashed, burning his fingers.

“Shit.”

“Language,” she admonished, before she looked down at his handiwork. “What on Earth are you doing?”

He snorted, endeared. “Making tea, clearly?”

“Making tea-” Mrs. Mandray stuttered, stopped, and shook her head. “That’s not tea, Captain, that’s a crime. Move.”

---

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@blueunoias @authenticgaymer

[caliburn-not-calculator]

Someone explain to me what happened with this detective au to land me here. Uh, some fic of the boys?

Anyway, they are... well you'll see

Contains: Religious overtones (they're not subtle at all), religious guilt, dom/sub undertones (i mean they might as well also be overtones), fade to black, implied sexual content, but overall it's very soft

Rays of afternoon light streamed through the drawing room’s tall windows, spilling across the floors and furnishings in a luminous mosaic. They glinted off unlit candle sticks, turned the ash scattering the desks to gold mica, and shone in the whites of Maxim’s eyes. Tears gathered in the corners as he took it in. His pupils swallowed the grey of his iris despite the glare, eyes wide and staring, pointed upward into the beams that slipped past Veerle’s face. Though his shadow saved most of Maxim from the burn, his companion refused to spare his sight. Not to give him such mercy. No relief. But the discomfort served its purpose. Not a test or cruelty, but a distraction.

Something to blind him to the scrapping nudge of a shoe sole at his waistband, and the tense heat that grew beneath its gentle pressure.

Maxim knelt on the plush Persian rug before the hearth, legs aching with a familiar throb. Not that of war or injury, but reverence. A position long forgotten, long ignored, but now…

Now he sat with a steady and still absoluteness. Trust unflinching and something like devotion in the sigh of each drawn out breath. Some may have considered him a damned soul, perhaps some small facet of himself did too, but it was drowned beneath the honey of Veerle’s stare and quashed beneath the press of his scuffed Oxford shoe. A disciple, not damned.

He tilted his head back, the slice of sun slipping over his cheekbones, blistering his lips. A long steadying breath whispered through them. He did not shift, not to avoid the pain, nor to hasten whatever Veerle had planned for him, but kept still. The ache pulsed up his hips, but the only groan that slipped from him was forced up from his contracting muscles and lungs at the slight downward push of Veerle’s foot. His waistband dipped, the leather scraping through the hair dusting his navel.

Maxim couldn’t decide if he wanted him to keep moving down or turn his attention higher. If he wanted that steady pressure to hasten the pleasurable pangs between his thighs or if he might fracture in both unbearable guilt and bliss at being given it. Either way, it was not his choice to make. Not his burden to bear. All Maxim had to do was take what Veerle bestowed unto him. Whether friction or famine, climax or come down.

He would take it. He had to take it. Wanted to take it. To take the absolution offered by gentle hands and heavy eyes. For surely there could be no sin in such supplication.

There was something about the submission which felt more like prayer than service ever had. Perhaps it was simply that, for the first time in decades, he truly, utterly, meant it. Offered it. Depended upon it. Maxim had little faith left to spare, nothing more than brittle shards that cut his hands whenever he tried to grasp them, and they did nothing but hurt when held close or offered out.

But, Veerle… 

The flitting fire of his chatter, the sparks of his laughter, the low smoulder of his rare and ravenous rage, melted the points and edges away. He made the ache manageable, tangible, and burned himself so irrevocably into its form that there was no other it could now be given to. No other deserving of such handiwork. None but its sculptor.

Maxim raised one hand from where it had laid limp on his thigh and gingerly tugged at the cuff of Veerle’s pants. The faintest, slightest tug. Maybe meaningless, maybe a mistake, but also, potentially, a request. Asked for or not, his companion hummed, tightened his fingers in Maxim’s hair, and pressed the sole of his shoe flat to his stomach. He swayed back as far as he could at the pressure, a strangled gasp slipping from his awe drunk lungs as the heel dug dangerously low. The hem of his shirt was rucked up by the motion. Sunlight spilt molten over his stomach, the fabric brushing teasingly soft against over sensitive skin. He choked back another noise, only harsh breath falling from parted lips, brows furrowed in concentration.

If there was one thing Maxim excelled at, perhaps to a detrimental degree, it was restraint. Restraint and reserve. Careful and precisely maintained control. Though he had handed Veerle the reins, allowed him to direct and decide and devastate him in whatever manner he believed best, it was still his to maintain. But now he merely had to focus on stilling his shaking form, and complying with each motion made onto him. A task almost meditative in its methodology. There was no heart stuttering panic or head splintering confusion, only the surety that he needed not to do anything more than take.

Perhaps once the vulnerability may have been sickening, but all that was left as Veerle dragged the toe of his shoe over his abdominals, shirt bunching beneath his pectorals, was a wake of heat. Melting molten heat. The pressure which crept up his chest like a lava flow. With painstaking languidness it sank into his skin, ever deeper, until it joined the pool of untouched arousal. It was a rare occasion for Maxim to blush, but the red across his cheeks bloomed unhindered.

He swallowed as the rough sole found the base of his sternum, and metal clinked against Veerle’s shoe. Maxim tensed at the sound. His companion paused, tilting his head. The steadying hand he had in Maxim’s hair hesitated in its gentle caresses through the sun gilt strands. 

“Alright, my love?” He asked, his voice more breath than words, more manifestation than man.

It took most of Maxim’s mind to lift his tongue from the floor of his mouth and draw enough breath for words. “Quite. I uh… just do not remind me of it now.”

Veerle’s expression, soft as it was, lightened to something even sweeter. Lips upturned, worry lines nigh invisible in the warm shadow he was veiled with. He readjusted, setting his weight more toward Maxim’s heart, and away from the pendant now peaking from his raised shirt. His eyes slipped shut with an appreciative hum, and he sagged backwards, more than ready to fall from his aching knees. That worship as this did not always require such discipline, that it could be done just as well limp and reclined, dizzy and dazed, with prayer that wasn’t words, was more a blessing than he could have imagined.

“Well, in that case,” Veerle shifted, leaning his weight forward, shoe flat to Maxim’s chest, gentle enough to not immediately send him sprawling, “Let us get more comfortable, down you go.”

Veerle’s hand slipped from his hair as Maxim’s legs slid from beneath him. He barely caught himself with shaking arms as he was forced to the floor, his companion’s heel surely leaving an indent on his flushed skin. His grip around his ankle tightened, the heat of Veerle’s so distant through the fabric he held. Too distant. Too cold. Not nearly enough to brand as he wanted it to, though he dared not move even that small fraction of covering.

Whatever logical sliver of thought he still possessed understood that Veerle wouldn’t mind, not even slightly, but to touch his companion in a way that even approached how he touched him, to fathom undressing him, in being the one to reveal and revel in his bared skin, was a desecration he could not bear to perform. How much he longed to mattered not. Instead, he held tight, and let himself sink into the softness of the rug beneath him. Let himself gasp as the prized pressure crept high enough to nudge his chin up, and settle over his bared throat.

The sun warming his exposed skin was a poor replacement for the heated body he craved, but it was enough of a comfort to lose any remaining tension in his muscles. The prickling sensation of eyes flitting over him, though not nearly as stimulating as his companion’s touch, likewise satisfied his need for contact. His breath came in rushing rattles as his lungs were lovingly crushed.

Through lidded eyes he watched as Veerle went to speak, lips parting, chest rising with an intake of air, but nothing but a low groan escaping. His companion raised a hand to his face. Dainty fingers made more for dancing across pages and pens (and if Maxim were to be shamefully indulgent, over his chest and jaw and perhaps dipping between his lips) than the warless warfare he insisted on partaking in covered his mouth. He nibbled on his knuckles, an action something between thoughtful and nervous, but most certainly considering. Maxim let his head fall back against the rug, surrendering any of his remaining strength with a sigh.

Patience. That was all he needed now. Patience while Veerle enacted whatever design he’d no doubt painstakingly envisioned and would equally painstakingly enact. He brushed his thumb over the laces of the shoe pinning him, the rough threads calming in their intricate repetition. The sensation of eyes methodically passing over him did not fade. Nor did the ignored need Veerle had stirred up within him. But he merely closed his eyes, and focused on breathing.

Somewhere in the foggy depths of his thoughts, he remembered once comparing himself to one of his insectoid specimens. A mindless light lured creature, willingly flitting into flame, helpless to the unfathomable force that pinned it in its forever position. It was almost flattering to think of now, that Veerle saw him as something both beautiful and fascinating enough to keep, to study, to tend to. That he may want him in a manner similar to Maxim’s own desire, though surely less base and simplistic than his prior imaginings.

What consciousness had condensed was sent swirling formless once more, as the weight lifted, only to return tenfold. A breathy groan was forced from him as the careful pressure of a foot against his chest and shoulder turned to the digging press of a knee. Veerle knelt over him, one leg tucked against his side, the other resting atop his chest. He shifted, getting comfortable, the pads of his fingers slipping beneath his raised shirt to glide over his collarbones.

“I’m going to get rid of this, okay?” he asked, tugging gently at the fabric, voice a gentle disturbance upon Maxim's mind, like water rushing over loose sand.

He could only, and barely, nod in response.

“Thank you.”

The hands on his chest vanished, and he’d be lying if he said a displeased sound didn’t escape him at their loss, but a moment later they returned at his wrists. Carefully, Veerle guided his arms above his head so he could remove his shirt with ease. He whispered thanks and encouragement as he did, the softness at odds with the harsh press of his knee upon his chest. The fabric seemed to rustle and vanish, his thoughts too caught up elsewhere to process the moment of its loss. Only when Veerle took back his wrists and guided his hands down did he notice it was done, that what Veerle didn’t shadow was set feebly aflame by the sun. 

He startled as a soft texture met his palms, warmth radiating beneath them. His hands twitched. More by accident than purposeful action, he lightly squeezed what Veerle had given him. The narrow width and faint curve of his companion's hips were in his grasp. Hands covered his own, gently smoothing over his knuckles as he settled.

A faint sigh left Veerle at the pressure, and the weight upon Maxim momentarily vanished. It returned, more evenly distributed and crucially, lower on his body. Maxim maintained his hold on his companion, so he had at least some warning before he lowered himself to straddle his hips. He did not, however, have a warning for the smooth and sudden roll of his body. His fingers dug into Veerle’s flesh as he ground against him, tearing a sound from him he would have deemed unholy had any but Veerle invoked it. Though his belt had been removed and discarded some time ago, no move had been made to loosen his slacks. No buttons or ties undone. It had been a passing issue until then, as his companion set a slow and steady pace with the motions of his hips, the usually well tailored item started to become far too restrictive.

Palms settled upon his chest, Veerle’s fingers splayed wide over his feverish skin. With each breath Maxim inadvertently pressed up into the touch. If he breathed deeper, let his chest rise further in pursuit of some shadow of force from the cautious motions of Veerle’s explorations, then he hoped it went unnoticed.

Maxim couldn’t quash the urge to crack open his eyes and search for signs that Veerle may be as worked up as he was. The hope to see his sharp features or teasing smiles turned red and wanton one which far predated their more involved relationship. The image of him with lips parted in silent pleasure, bright eyes dark with need and face aflame was one Maxim had shamefully indulged himself with when he was too exhausted to stop himself. The thought that one day he may see it made the heat within him roil. The sight that met him was certainly no disappointment.

His companion gave him a shaky grin, crooked and creasing his eyes with yet impermanent laughter lines. Hair fell over his brow, coal dark strands loose and framing his face, and stress greyed streaks crowning him with silver. His clothes remained faintly rumpled as they were when they began. As neat as Veerle ever wore them, a few buttons undone and suspenders pulled over his narrow shoulders. Some part of Maxim considered grasping them, pulling down, forcing Veerle to finally meet his lips. The more sensible part acknowledged that moving his hands from his companion's hips was a feat beyond him.

“I, uh, don’t suppose you’ve ever been ridden before?” Veerle whispered with another roll of his hips, red blooming high on his cheeks and wide fluttering eyes painting far too sweet for all that he was doing.

Maxim failed to swallow his groan as the friction sent a pulse of pleasure coiling tight within him. The sweetness only unspooled him further, drawing out each thread of strength and will and weaving it through the loom of Veerle’s careful ministrations, into some new fragile tapestry. A picture wanton creature of his own design. 

“What?” He mumbled between shaking breaths, peering up through heavy lidded eyes and teeth clenched as Veerle slowed, but continued to make nigh imperceptible motions more teasing than stimulating.

“Well, that’s probably a no then. Don’t worry, my love.”

Veerle leaned forward, eyes soft crescents with his smile, glittering in the afternoon light like shattered stained glass. His shirt tickled Maxim’s bare chest, his breath caressing his jaw, the hands on his shoulders pressing with more force as he drew closer. A gentle kiss was placed upon his cheek, chapped lips lingering in its place.

“I’ll take you slow.”