#FYI this isn’t edited so...sorry

[raitonsfw]

jjk men: sub edition

characters: gojo satoru, geto suguru, okkotsu yūta, kamo chōsō, & sukuna ryōmen.

warnings: 18+ mdni, smut, fem!reader, gn!reader (gojo), sub!characters, vibrating sex toys (gojo's and geto's), face riding (yuta's), pegging (choso's), refusal to submit (sukuna's), whining, whimpering, pleading, begging, dirty talk, bondage (gojo's), p in v intercourse (geto [riding] & sukuna [mating press]), anal sex (choso's obvi), slight rim play (gojo's), degrading & praising, pet names, gojo selfishly whines, geto can't keep his composure, okkotsu loves you, choso's completely fucked out, sukuna shares a body with itadori (& doesn't care about your kinks), fyi the reader isn't very dominant (more neutral, maybe i'll write another one of these with a dom!reader later on)

a/n: this came about 'cause of some hate from an anon about me writing satoru gojo whimpering & that men shouldn't whimper or moan? next time, be a dear and send it off anon? i'll answer you more thoroughly that way. i love having the option that is 'write to spite'. wc: 3.2k total. m.list

divider credit: @hitobaby

❝𝐬𝐮𝐛!𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮…❞ who isn’t really all that submissive– at least not on the surface. in public his exterior shone a haughty personality but in the midst of silk sheets, he whined like a little bitch. 

soft whines of ‘please, baby…’ and ‘r-right there– yes…’ as you moved the vibrator towards the tip of his cock. he was sitting up against the headboard, his knees slightly bent and his bright eyes were glued on your hand that held the small pink wand. 

you knew gojo quite well, the man could withstand almost anything sorcery related; curses expelling out left and right, best friends turned enemies– but he couldn’t handle the juddering feeling of a sex toy. he’d practically short-circuit. his entire body would freeze up as you ran it along the side of his thigh, a dulled lust sinking within his eyes and suddenly his cock would be rock hard.

you’d watch as his legs would spread open for you, a quiet obedience held within the air and you’d hum in content as he let you shed his trousers and boxers. and holy shit, it was so intoxicating to take in how fucking hard he got just from the slight indication of the vibrator buzzing up his thigh. 

he wouldn’t be quiet for long though, no– that was just for show. as soon as your hand grabbed at his flushed cock, a choked gasp would follow and a bunch of pleas would spill out of his mouth like a waterfall. 

“need the toy– give me the toy…”

“y/n, baby…sweetheart– c’mon...” 

“please, don’t want your hand right now–”

“‘m sorry, i’m so sorry– fuck-!”

and despite his empty words (and the rushed apology when he vaguely realized his mistake), the vibrator would be set to the near highest setting. ‘cause there was something so hot watching him squirm from such a delicate thing, bulleting at an overstimulating press firsthand.

god, you could get drunk off of his whimpers and cries as they spilled from his mouth every time you ran the vibrator over a vein on the underside of his cock… his jolts of pleasure when you upped the setting by a hair as he was so sensitive and even the slightest change would send him spiraling… the constant clenching and unclenching of his fists within the confines of his blindfold– courtesy of you tying it that way. 

you had the right mind not to edge him, his voice pitching higher and higher each second you ran the droning sensation over his slit, precum slathering the toy. his chest rose and fell quickly as you switched the settings to a different rhythm, his back arching out towards you and his cock bobbing against his tummy with a loud whine escaping him. 

his head had knocked back into the headboard with his eyelids fluttering closed, a fucked out expression washing over his face as his thighs trembled– as his whole body trembled in front of you. you knew he was close; the tiny whimpers felling long with each stroke of the toy and the way his muscles tightened in his stomach with each roll of his hips as he desperately feigned for more friction. 

which led you to take a quick gamble– and press the toy right against his rim. 

you didn’t even have time to replace your hand on his cock as he painted his shirt white. long spurts decorated it, nearly up to his chin and you hummed softly to yourself as you pumped him through his release, your name heavy on his lips as he rode it out. you cooed out praises as he bucked into your hand, dribbling the rest of his cum all over it with small pants filling the room. 

and as soon as he came down, his hands were slipping from his blindfold and pinning you underneath him– it was your turn now. 

❝𝐬𝐮𝐛!𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐮…❞ who’s slightly submissive– but knows how to keep his composure. it wasn’t often you got to see him needy, the man wasn’t exactly enthralled in giving you a show; so instead of begging for what he needed, he did everything in his power to please you.

the most he’d give you were tiny hums from the constant drag of his cock as you rode him, his eyes rolling in the back of his head. when he had the pleasure of cumming inside you – when he could because you’d fall apart against him in mere minutes – you’d hear the most sinful whimpers bare from his throat, his hands gripping your hips as he gasped for breath.

you couldn’t escape the cuddling afterwards either, the quiet contented sighs that captured you whole as he worked his body around yours in a tight embrace when the stars fell away from your eyelids. his mind would be reeling with the aftermath, still painfully hard in his boxers since he didn’t finish; but you came on his cock and that’s all that mattered to him.

but there were just some days where he needed you more than ever – and the aching pleasure of his cock spasming inside you – a pliant buzz reigning him in as he heard you come home. his arms would wrap around your waist as you’d toss your keys onto the kitchen counter and you’d feel his breath fan against your ear as he spoke, a slight whine etched in his voice.

“y/n, come to the bedroom with me…”

“ah–! shit… please?”

“need you tonight… can’t wait any longer–” 

“gotta be inside you– right now.”

and you thought it was the usual routine, you laid out underneath him with his cock driving into you like no tomorrow. but as you were pulled into the bedroom, the box of sex toys you shared with him had been dumped over the bed and you realized his neediness and the sound that droned lightly from him– the vibrating cock ring was missing.

you weren’t exactly sure if geto ever acted submissive in his life, never really wanting to push him too far as he already did so much for you; he never seemed bothered by the lack of reciprocation. but when he came home with the cock ring and your life sure flipped a sudden switch, your collected man reduced to nothing but a puddle as you drove him to the edge over and over again. 

as you fully sank onto his cock, his ring would vibrate against your folds and you’d sigh out in relief when you noticed his face screwed up in pleasure– and pain as he was already so close to his godforsaken orgasm. needy– fucking desperate whines would leak from his mouth as you bounced lightly on him, some hiccuped noises escaping him and– oh? he might cry. 

his hair was splayed out on the pillows, some of it stuck to his sweaty shoulders as the corners of his eyes brimmed with tears, his hands clutching onto you for dear life. he wouldn’t say anything, too drunk off of the overstimulation of your pussy and the vibrations pushing him over the edge; except he couldn’t cum yet. not until you took off the cock ring and honestly, did you really want to? 

this was one of the only times you saw this side of him after all. 

you eventually let him cum, pulling off his cock to ease the ring off while instructing him softly not to cum until he was inside you. and he’d be damned if he didn’t shoot off inside you, holding himself back for all of ten seconds before the feeling of your walls warm around him pushed him over– you felt him twitch inside you and a lengthy moan accompanied as he tried his best to pull you close into him through it. 

he stole kisses from you afterwards, his demeanor returning to the same old facade he encased himself in and you wondered if you buy him vibrating beads– what would that do to him?

❝𝐬𝐮𝐛!𝐨𝐤𝐤𝐨𝐭𝐬𝐮 𝐲𝐮𝐭𝐚…❞ who is just the right amount of submissive. he would quiver at the faintest feel of your fingers ghosting his cock as he knelt before you. his eyes would be nearly blown wide, taking in your composure as his falls away when you bend down eye level to him. 

he’d know better than to buck into your hand like a poor puppy, desperate for any friction you could give him as his fingers reach out to grip at your clothing. and he wouldn't even realize he broke a rule as he repeated in his brain ‘don’t thrust’ into the warmth of your palm. 

as you backed away, you’d notice the tears that pricked the corners of his eyes, the pout that would cross his face when he tried to retrace his movements– and then his mouth would be going a mile a minute with apologies.

“baby… i’m sorry! i’ll be good, i promise– i won’t touch you again.”

“please… forgive me? use me to get off…”

and that wasn’t a bad idea in your eyes as you thought it over, squatting back up to let him breathe. god, he was so pliant with you, complete putty– pulled and stretched out for you. his cock curved up towards his tummy as it stood proudly from the confines of his jujutsu uniform; he was so excited he didn’t even care to unzip his zipper, he just pulled himself out ‘cause you told him to. 

as you finally allowed him up onto the space of the bed after his relentless regret, a muffled ‘thank you’ spilled from his lips before you could even position yourself onto his face and you clutched the headboard to steady yourself; because he wasn’t allowed to touch– and he sure knew that as he was chanting it in his mind.

he needed you to use him, to just sit right on his tongue and ride him mercilessly; it’s what he deserves for breaking one of your rules. but you were nice, you weren’t mean with your punishments and honestly this seemed more like a reward for him. he was manipulative, that one– you had to be careful as he could get you to do anything for him with just a glassy eyed look and a pout. 

his hands grasped at the sheets for leverage as you sat down against him, his tongue not hesitating in the slightest to swipe over the swell of your clit and you huffed out a relieved moan. you didn’t falter, your hips rolling against his mouth with the shock of warm pleasure flowing through your body. and he reciprocated your moans, humming gently into you as he lapped at your arousal trickling against the tip of his tongue.

and all he wanted to do was touch you – bury his fingers inside you and fuck the life out of you – anything for his girl. but he knew the moment he moved his fingers from the threaded sheets, you’d pull off with a whine falling from his lips. god, did he want to please you– and he wanted it in return; his cock was aching even as it laid against his tummy. he couldn’t take it anymore, between the sweet taste of your slick running down his chin and the insane amount of precum building at the tip of his cock– he begged. 

“fuck, please touch me… won’t cum til you say so, i swear–”

“just need your hands on me, y/n honey… l-love you so much– god, thank you.”

when you leaned back to pull him off, your other hand feathered into his hair and you caught a glimpse of his dark rimmed eyes staring back up with such profound desire– you just knew he wouldn’t last more than a few seconds.

❝𝐬𝐮𝐛!𝐤𝐚𝐦𝐨 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐨…❞ who takes the cake for being the most submissive slut known to man. when you sunk into him the first time with the strap nudging into him subtly, he couldn’t help but let out a choked whimper. he would be so fucking full– his rim clenching harshly around you and you’d coo at him; some praises that did you no good as he could barely hear you through the pounding rush of blood in his ears.

you couldn’t even begin to fathom the drunk passion you felt for this boy, arching his back for you as you started to ease yourself in all the way– it was fucking insane and you weren’t even the one with your nerves on fire. he’d grip at the sheets with a wanton moan, pushing back onto the strap with eager hips and it took everything in you not to collapse onto him with the heated arousal you felt in your cunt. 

you’d be on your toes, basically straddling the poor boy’s hips, your hands flush against his waist to keep you steady and all you’d hear was ‘more, please… i can take it–! need you to move.’ christ, you haven’t even gotten your bearings yet and he’s begging for you to pound him into the fucking mattress. 

his spiked hair wouldn’t be in their usual ponytails, it sleeked down the back of his neck and soon, it was going to be balled up in your palms while you fucked the living shit out of him.

once you actually rolled your hips into his tight hole, a broken moan flew out of his mouth and his head drooped down onto the side of the bed. his entire body shook in pleasure as you thrusted into him shallowly, hushed pants coming from him as his cock dripped onto the sheets beneath you. 

you noticed his cock rather quickly– and how neglected it looked, hanging between his legs with a reddened flush and you snaked your hand underneath him to tug at it a bit, earning a repressed whimper that was muffled in the sheets he buried his face into. before you knew it, your hips found a rhythm you were content with and one he was ecstatic with, his body jolting upwards with every stroke of his cock and bruising of your strap. 

you knew you nailed his prostate when his head snapped up, his entire body shuddering around you. his moan was so sharp in your ears, it delved straight towards spine and you threaded your fingers into his hair with the words ‘good boy, that’s it… that’s the spot?’ leaking from your mouth in a soft tone. to which he nodded, a heavy need carving out his common sense and replacing it with nothing whines and whimpers. 

‘soo good, thankyouthankyouthankyou–’

‘right there, keep going…’ 

and you did, even when you noticed his tongue loll out of his mouth– the fucked out expression blatant on his face as you pulled his head back to look at you. his violet eyes were watery, his mouth completely open in near silent moans as you pounded into him now, and you swore you saw a blood tear drip from his mark as he squeezed his eyes shut through a particular thrust. and now he begged for you, pleaded like no tomorrow as you fucked him senseless; his entire mind clouded with nothing but ecstasy.

‘am i being a good boy? please– tell me i’m being a good boy for you…’

‘fuck me harder, yeah– yes… shit–! so close…’

as he came around the strap, you watched in awe– ropes of cum spurting against the sheets and harsh gasps filled the air as you kissed down his back with your hands massaging his waist through the heavy orgasm. you ran a quick finger down his spine, reveling in the way he trembled against you as you pulled out of him. 

you wouldn’t even talk to him properly afterwards, just tiny adorations; because you knew as soon as he came to, he’d be out like a light.

❝𝐬𝐮𝐛!𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐮𝐧𝐚 𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧…❞ who isn’t submissive at all. the king of curses didn’t have a submissive bone in his body– completely overtaken by the dominant hull. you’ve tried to make him submit – more than once – but it never worked out in your favor.

your hands would delve towards his shoulders to pin him down as you rode him– well, tried to ride him as his cock pounded up into you harshly– but you’d be thrown off in an instant, a mating press following suit so you couldn’t move underneath him.

you’d whine for him to take you more than once in a single night, in pursuit of overstimulating him– but you failed to realize just how much stamina he had and you ultimately ended up being the one overstimulated with your cunt stuffed full of his cum each and every time.

there were some days where he played along with your endeavors to be nice. sometimes a quiet whine would fill his throat before replacing it with hefty growls and grunts while you sucked his cock. and other times he’d let you have the upper hand for more than a half a second, reveling in the way your body moved against him to try to overtake him. 

your tits would bounce right in his face and it made him think twice– he almost begged for them, wanting nothing more than to take them into his mouth and litter them red with teeth marks. but that thought left his mind rather quickly as your cunt pressed warmly against his cock, stirring it awake from its confines and it was game over. 

there was no way he’d beg for a lowly human.

why would he need to when you gave yourself up to him so easily? you’d practically jump him as soon as he switched with itadori, strong arms holding onto you as you pushed him onto the bed. but of course, he could flip you over in an instant and he would, his cock dragging deliciously along your walls within the next two minutes. 

as much as it was fun to watch you squirm and cry about him not letting up his dominance, it also turned him on immensely. his cock would ache inside you as you begged for him to make a needy noise… his eyes would threaten to roll back as you clenched around him in hopes he would show some type of submission… and he’d have to recollect himself when you breathed hot in his ear that he was such a good boy for fucking you so well. why the fuck did that affect him? 

but once he grounded himself, you were in trouble– his cock pounding into you with heinous phrases leaking from his mouth. he couldn’t bear to listen to you anymore, the idea drove him insane– a fucking human shouldn’t be calling him wretched pet names like that. so to shut you up, his palm would end up on your mouth and his tongue there would shove straight into it. he just needed to fuck the kink out you, that’s all. 

and of course being the curse that he is, once you couldn’t speak, he’d tease (berate) you about your subby needs.

“ah, so you get off on pussy men now?”

“don’t look away from me, doll, answer the question.”

“what– you want me to whine and beg for you like a goddamn pup? i don’t think so.”

“now hold your legs open ‘n take my cock… like a normal fucking human.”

yeah, you tried and all it got you was a sore cunt each time, unable to walk without a bit of a wobble– his devilish smirk and targeted eyes followed you every step of the way before he relinquished his form to itadori in the morning. 

taglist: @izakyun | @classyempathmongercloud | @satorawrrr | @winterskeleton

a/n: wanna get tagged in future writing posts? join my taglist!

[belovedivies]

Hi its my first time I request

Can you do Raphael from killer Peter manhwa

Like when he get jealous or how did he fell in love

Im sorry if my english was bad

raphael relationship headcanons

cw: minor spoiler, yandere content

LOVE?

Raphael doesn’t “fall in love”. If he takes a liking to someone, they are automatically his property. No questions asked.

With you, however, who neither end up as another dead body in line for cremation nor a slave to his ever-expanding collection… it almost seems like Raphael goes easy on you.

That being said, he’s far from an ideal guy to be around. Your ears will most likely blast from hearing him shout at his underlings every few minutes of the day.

Your presence does help to ease the tension a bit though, and it won’t take as long for Raphael to direct his attention towards you and just forget about his useless lower-ranks.

Royalty treatment to the max, but only when you behave. This man has the most influential organization on Earth in the palm of his hand—you won’t want for anything else when he’s around.

Between the constant chase for Peter’s head and the killers' recruitment to rebuild Glory Club from the ground up, Raphael burns his money on you. Want that special edition of your favorite book but it’s unfortunately sold out? He’ll get it printed as many times as you want, all with your name on the leather cover in goldwork embroidery.

Just thank him after. Give him a bright smile and a kiss on the cheek; Raphael prefers his toy sweet and obedient.

JEALOUS?

Raphael gets jealous, that’s for sure. It’s just something that comes naturally for a love-deprived child.

His servants know better than to stare; longer than five seconds and it’s an instant death. This man will whisper sweet nothings into your ear while his subordinate lies there on the floor, dying in the pool of their own blood.

He likes to think that his possessiveness isn’t that bad. Can you really blame Raphael for going barbaric when one of the Apostles flirts with you during a meeting, right in front of his face?

And the motherfucker even has the audacity to look so smug about it.

With a territorial growl, Raphael pulls you into his lap right after; his hands around your hips feeling like the grip of an anaconda.

“Last warning, Philip.” Before he eventually joins the pile of unnamed bodies down the pit, that is.

Rumors soon go in cycle within Glory about the nature of your relationship with this unpredictable man.

For a plaything, Raphael does favor you a lot. No one can actually tell how long this will go on, or what tragedy shall befall your pitiful existence once the fun is up and he stabs you in the back, literally.

But for now, you’re still untouchable because you’re his. And men or God shall lay a hand on you unless they wish to suffer a fate worse than death.

♡dividers credit: @xurengu0♡ ♡masterlist♡ a/n: lmao this was a really unexpected ask (no complaints tho) (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖) fyi im not taking any requests yet, but i cooked this one up fast for u. hope u enjoy reading, my lovely yuri ◕‿↼

[tinypandacakes]

im sorry but for what reason u can't update? like u said this sunday and then decide to what? update for the next week? thank you, take it easy ☺️👍

I’m going to delete and not answer these types of asks in the future fyi

I said like last week maybe i would be done with the chapter by the 28th and possibly August 4th as a backup. I don’t owe anyone an explanation why I didn’t update. The chapter isn’t finished so I’m not updating

Real life stuff, family, my children, searching for a job, and taking care of myself mentally and physically are more important than fic writing. Sometimes I update faster and sometimes it takes longer to finish and edit the chapter.

It is what it is

[painfulstretch]

hello there & welcome to my blog!

i'm a trans guy and very much into birth related kinks - important: birth kinks of the more... let's call it unpleasant kind. sadistic might be how others view it. so if you're only into wholesome, supportive births or orgasmic births, you're in the wrong place, sorry. speaking of in the wrong place.

!!! DNI if you're under the age of 18. PLEASE. seriously, this isn’t meant for minors.

ALSO DNI homophobes/transphobes, detrans, sexists, racists, etc., as well as people who take these things beyond fantasy and into real life. any content on here (from dubcon/sexual assault to torture) is pure fantasy, anyone actually doing this to something IRL against the other person's explicit will is disgusting, just FYI

now about what i'm into;

first up, i mostly prefer being the seeder/the one in control of the situation but every now and then i like to indulge in being pregnant & giving birth as well. don't really do rp but that might change at some point. you can shoot me asks and dms alike, tho i prefer asks.

it would be too long to list everything but here's a summary of my likes + dislikes

LIKES:

-long, inconvenient and PAINFUL births

-begging, screaming, writhing in agony

-birth denial, stuckage, anything that prolongs the labor and makes it harder on the pregnant person (sex/gender doesn't matter)

-non-human births (monster, oviposition, demons etc) -> aren't the primary focus but will definitely appear here as well

-public birth -> the humiliation of bearing down surrounded by strangers who stare and snicker and pull out their phones

-unassisted birth -> just as much as i enjoy someone intentionally making a birth harder, a pregnant person suffering through contraction after contraction completely on their own is also fucking brilliant

-clothing birth -> few things are hotter than a huge bulge in someone's pants

DISLIKES

-death -> as much as i enjoy seeing the carrier in pain, i don't want them or the baby to actually die

-piss/scat

-unbirth

that's it for now, tho i'll probably come back & edit this a bit at dome point

[jovrien]

Yo yo so I went over my drafts and found a post I’ve written last April but idk why I didn’t post this.

⚠️⚠️⚠️ yapping alert! It’s all nonsense. I’m just posting this for my future self lol

••••••••••••••••••

Something bothers me and the Holy Spirit is pestering me to write this shit on tumblr for my peace of mind so here goes.. (Oh btw this post is nonsense and quite lengthy but I just wanna shit it outta my mind so I could finally let go of whatever this is. And oh I’m kinda drunk lol)

But first lemme confess something lol I have a crush on the guy on this photo. I took a screenshot of this pic last March 26, I stare at it every morning and damn I still feel the same to this day lol am I.. am I.. still okay? 🤭

Damn this bro is too fine I wanna look exactly like him on my next edition reincarnation 🙂‍↕️

Moving on..

So I’m just new to this whole Astrology shit and as a Capricorn Sun/Virgo Rising, I can say it’s pretty accurate how they described me as having a straight nose, good forehead, and a person who is neat freak lmaooo 😆 crazy 🤭 so yeah I never really gave a flying fuck about Astrology because I thought it was a bit ‘girly’ or something only girls do, but it all changed when last December 30, 2023, I saw a Tiktok about the Cardinal Signs (Aries, Cancer, Libra and Capricorn) finally ending their 16-year struggle since 2008. I mean, the last 16 years truly made me realize a lot of shit, and I lost A LOT. The last one taken away from me was my dog (Gisele Heart Particles Nougat Shamcey Chamyto Chimmy 2010-2023). So yeah, it was quite a relief knowing that the cycle is coming to an end and that the next 20 years is gonna be rosy for the Cardinal Signs. But there’s one more boss fight before Pluto finally leaves us Cardinal Signs for good as it’s going to retrograde back for a just a few months (September-November) and then GONE FOREVER.

Btw, astrologers are saying that the Fixed Signs are gonna go through shit in the next 20 years, but please don’t be afraid if you’re a Fixed Sign (especially if you’re a nice person).

So yeah, I found myself crotch-deep into astrology and found out that my ruling planet is Saturn 🪐 and that meant instant karma in both directions. And this is what bothers me because it means I have to be a good guy all the time! I mean, I’m actually a good guy because I’m kind to animals and the needy, and my secret Spotify Progressive House playlist is just 💯 👌🏼 sorry I digress lol

What bothers me is that they are saying that I shouldn’t do bad things because karma would bite me in the ass. And I have been losing sleep because of that. You see, I’m addicted to doing bad things (no, not the criminal bad things fyi. I’m a very lawful person). The things I do are too extreme that it causes panic in heaven 😝 jk

Okay while writing this post I found this comment on a Tiktok vid that made all my worries disappear

Bing Bong! Amazing how the Universe answers my questions right away. 😈 Now that I don’t have to worry about guilt (On so MANY occasions I made people do the unthinkable. I fucked my friend’s partner during a threesome) So yeah.. now that the fear of being karma’d is out of the way, lemme tell you (yeah you sleuthing relative who haunts my blog!) the best thing about being a Capricorn ruled by Saturn - we are divinely protected by Karma. It’s like having a Doberman on a night walk around the block.

I have thought of the times when people were mean and really really bad to me even if I only showed them kindness so Imma list the karma they got. (btw I’m gonna have to change some details about them so it isn’t too obvi who they are)

1. This person humiliated me in front of people (worst thing that was ever done to me), then two days later bammmm the most devastating thing happened to his wife and kids which left him in extreme pain and distress for a few months.

2. This woman hated me for no reason, talked shit about me, then a few days later she was diagnosed with cancer.

3. An evil person who did me super dirty was humiliated on a national level lmao imagine being in the news for the wrong things you did.

4. I was never bullied when I was a kid, but there was this classmate in grade school (24 years ago) who was so jealous of my Nokia 3210. She intentionally sat on my backpack, broke the screen, and even though I was fuming, I didn’t hit her ultra wide face with my hand. A few days later I heard from a classmate that she was going through shit at home because her mom found out that her dad was having an affair lmao 🤣 I stalked her IG just now and found out she’s battling with extreme obesity. Oh nooo karma is a cat purring on my lap cherryt 😝

I could go on writing (20 or more) about how people who did me wrong got bitten by karma but that would make me seem immature, childish and vindictive so imma just end this nonsense here. Ciao 🍻

[birindale]

She-Ra: Progressive of Power

Episode 1: “The Sword of She-Ra” - Introduction

I’m really bad at consuming podcasts, but being able to read along helps. It makes things easier to find later on when I tune back in after getting distracted, or weeks later after I inevitably forget when things were discussed but want to double check something. And this podcast has a few interviews with crew members on top of its premise generally appealing to me, so. I’m making transcripts, I’m posting them here, if this isn’t of interest to you go ahead and blacklist “progressive of power”. If this is of interest to you, please click through the above link and support the hosts directly.

... and I annotated it. sorry. at least it’s footnotes this time?

Narrator from The Secret of the Sword (1985)(Which for series purposes is referred to as The Sword of She-Ra as it’s made of the first five episodes squashed together, I promise that’s relevant): [the She-Ra: Princess of Power theme plays behind him] Where darkness rules, fights the champion of light. Where hope seems lost, there rides the Rebellion. Together they stand ready against the dark, evil warriors of the Horde and their leader, the terrible Hordak. The Rebellion, armed with hope and ancient powers against the force of an intergalactic army. This is the story of one who will become leader of the Great Rebellion. She-Ra: Princess of Power!

ERIC: Hello everybody, my name is Eric.

LAUREN: My name is Lauren. It's nice to hang out with you and talk about a cartoon from... the year I was born I guess?

ERIC: Whoa! The year after I was born, so yeah this is the pilot episode of She-Ra: Progressive of Power. This is a rewatch podcast with a political twist. We're going to watch episodes of the She-Ra animated series which is now on Netflix and kind of look at the ways that it both holds up and then fails a modern day progressive agenda. And I'll talk about why I wanted to do that in a minute. But first I thought we should maybe get into just a little bit about who we are because nerds love to gatekeep. I might edit that line out. But I feel like we should just give some context to why we are two people who are qualified to take on this project. So first off, both of us are political volunteers for a very progressive Illinois campaign.

LAUREN: A certain progressive Illinois campaign.

ERIC: Yes. Maybe gubernatorial in nature. Maybe if you watch our Facebooks it’ll become clear. But either way, you know, we're both on that side of the political spectrum and we're both very nerdy. I make podcasts for a group of people called The Nerdologues, and... I don't know, this show has always been a favorite of mine. I saw Wonder Woman and I thought, “Wow, Wonder Woman is amazing! I want to watch another thing with an amazing female lead. And then I'm like, oh, I love She-Ra. Hey, it's on Netflix!” Now, FYI, I have the DVDs, but they're buried away. I dug them out to watch the documentaries for this podcast, though. But I'm like, ooh, Netflix is easy. And I started watching it and I'm like, “This feels... maybe too relevant.”

LAUREN: Netflix is just successfully making every other form of media irrelevant. Like, well, you have the DVDs, you don't need them.

ERIC: Yeah, but so Lauren, you have never seen She-Ra before.

LAUREN: Right, and that's kind of why I agreed to this. Otherwise, I think pretty niche-y premise. So, I wrote the blog Geek Girl Chicago for a solid five years or so. I've kind of backed off of that, mostly because when I was very small and into science fiction and comics and geek culture, it was an underground kind of, uh... subculture. And now it's just culture. You know, I was just downtown and went into Uniqlo with some friends after going to Starbucks. And all of Uniqlo was like Nintendo shirts and Disney. And my friend goes, “It's like we're at a convention except it's just downtown Chicago. It's not... it’s not geeky anymore.” So I hate to be that elitist dork who's like, “I don't like it anymore because it's mainstream.” But I was really excited to maybe talk about something that everyone has heard of, and watch something that I've actually never experienced before. I also cosplay. I have worked on other podcasts such as Our Fair City and I don't know. I'm a dog person. We’re... We're here with Eric's dog, and she definitely smells my dog. And I find her very distracting, because that's a big part of my personality these days.

ERIC: Yeah, P.S. my dog’s name is AC, short for I kid you not, Adora Corona. So clearly the She-Ra fandom is big in me. But yeah, you'll get to know Lauren and I through the course of this show. Let's dive into She-Ra. So we're going to cover a different episode or a different set of episodes every week. Today we're talking about the... the first five, which is kind of the pilot of She-Ra. It's called the Sword of She-Ra. And uh, this is gonna be more of a top level discussion, I imagine, than what eventual episodes will end up being. Because I don't want to get into as much plot specifics as just kind of like the creation of this character and why she exists. And yeah, we'll talk about the five episodes and stuff. But I think the background of She-Ra is really fascinating. So if I may, I will lay the groundwork, and then, I am so excited to hear what you thought about this.

LAUREN, laughing: It's on your face. He's smiling so big right now.

ERIC: Oh my God, this is great. Because well, I asked Lauren, “What do you know about She-Ra?” And she's like, “I've seen girls cosplay as her and that's it.“ And I'm like, “You don't know her story at all.”

ERIC AND LAUREN: “No.”

ERIC: Okay, so, clearly there's a big twist in the Sword of She-Ra, and Lauren didn't know what it was until she watched these episodes. So we're going to get there. But let me talk about the background of the show because I think it's interesting, and it's going to inform our discussion about pro--like the progressive values of the show. So this is 1985, and He-Man, which I'm sure a lot of you guys are familiar with, at least in passing, that's all you need to be, has been a show for two years. And the production company that makes it has reached the point where they have so many episodes that they would actually be losing money to produce new episodes, like it was just in their advantage to sell it to syndication. And so they're looking for the next show to do. So Lou Scheimer, the guy who runs the company, wanted to do a show for girls, the reason being he had worked a long time ago on a show called The Hardy Boys and his daughter said to him, "Dad, why do the girls always trip and fall?” and so Lou said, "I wanna make a show where it's the men who trip and fall." [[1]] And initially th--Filmation was going to produce a Barbie show, and Mattel said, "No thanks,” and this is the actual quote, according to Lou, which is very creepy--the Mattel exec said, "Because Barbie already exists in the mind of a child."

LAUREN: What?

ERIC: Which is a weird reason to deny a business partnership. But so Lou and--and his crew were thinking about the success of He-Man, and a couple of the better writers from He-Man, because that show certainly had ups and downs--but a couple of the actual consistent writers had this idea to like, what if, what if he had a sister? And what if no one knew? [[2]] So that's the basic plot of the Sword of She-Ra is that He-Man is summoned to go to this strange world he's never been to before, and he takes this sword with him, and the sword is designed for this woman who works for the bad guys, the Evil Horde, who ends up being his sister. And so you find out that Hordak, the leader of the Horde, took her as a baby from her parents and then like, hid her away. And the pain of that memory was so great that the Sorceress on Eternia on He-Man's world made everybody forget except for her parents and the Sorceress herself, which is like fucking traumatic and still that plot gives me chills.

But what we have here is an action show with a female lead, which already is pretty... pretty irregular and that was something that the creative team was very aware of. Staff writer Francis Moss, I have some quotes from some documentaries on the DVD. He said, from page one, “We're empowering girls. I don't know about proto-feminism, but it certainly was female empowering.” Staff writer J. Michael Straczynski doesn't hesitate to use the F word. He said it was feminist from the go. So this is very consciously a female-centric show. A lot of the staff shied away from calling it feminist, because that was the time. But you know, it's not really any different now.

People still don't like to use that word necessarily. But... more than that, it's kind of this story... You know, in He-Man, it's the typical 80s cartoon setup where the good guys are reactive. So the bad guy does something, and then the good guys are like, “You can't do that. That's against the social order.” And then he comes and stops them. But She-Ra, it's the inverse where these guys called the Horde have been ruling this planet for--according to the series Bible--20 years. [[3]] And they--they are the status quo. And the heroes are the Rebellion fighting against the status quo to make that change. So the heroes are proactive in the show. And I mean, not to get--Well... I'm gonna have to not say ‘not to get too political’ on this podcast. Cause it's political.

LAUREN: We have the word progressive in the title.

ERIC: Right.

LAUREN: I think you're stuck.

ERIC: This is a political show. It felt... It's not a one-to-one correlation, but watching the pilot again on Netflix, I'm like, this feels... this is too real right now. This idea of like an evil empire that controls basically everything from, you know, taxation to... to free speech, and the people are subjugated and some of them don't even know. It's just really... It feels more relevant than it probably has in a while. And I want to read,before I turn it over to Lauren, what J. Michael Straczynski--who by the way, you guys will probably note is the creator of Babylon 5, so he went on to have a wonderful career after She-Ra--What J. Michael Straczynski wrote in the series bible for She-Ra, page one. He says, “The time for words is past. It is the time for action. A time for the taking of vows, the forging of alliances against tyranny. A time for leadership. For over 20 years, the evil horde has ruled Etheria with an iron fist and cruel calculation. Their rule has gone largely unchallenged, until now. A band of patriots brought together by their love of freedom have pledged their lives and their swords to bring down the dark dictators from another world, willing to tackle impossible odds in their quest for an ideal: Freedom. Leading this band of patriots is She-Ra: Princess of Power.”

And so... even though a lot of episodes of the show did devolve into standard 80s cartoon fare, I think it is baked into the very premise of the show. Like these writers are very conscious of the fact that this is at its heart a political struggle, a band of women fighting an oppressive militaristic regime led by an evil pig man. And that just feels so relevant. So, Lauren Faits.

LAUREN: Yes.

ERIC: What did you think of the first five episodes of She-Ra?

LAUREN: Oh my gosh, what a ride. So I do need to point out that before I started watching She-Ra, um, I had not watched He-Man either. And Eric gave me an episode of He-Man to watch. And, uh, you know, it was charming. I joked that just the--the background music was always just He-Man over and over and over. It was just so pumped up and masculine the whole time that I'm thinking gosh, you know is this She-Ra show just going to be this in pink and purple and light blue and I--I mention the color palette because honestly... oddly enough, that was the first thing about this show to really strike me. In addition to there being so many women on screen all the time, we live in this era, still, today where toys are us and Target have these like pink aisles where... that's the girl stuff and that's where you go to look for girl toys, and She-Ra and the Rebellion and all the villains, they don't stick to that color palette. It is a wonderfully just, colorful show and it's not screaming ‘princess, pretty, feminine’ the whole time, and yet it manages to be feminine, and that's pretty exciting to me. Um. Some of the things that surprised me from the get-go, uh-- I wasn't expecting a male narrator, in the beginning of the theme--

NARRATOR: Where darkness rules--

LAUREN: But, you know, all right, cool. And um... in one of the first scenes--so they’re clearly, they're trying to sell She-Ra through He-Man, like He-Man’s super popular I guess in 85?

ERIC: It was, uh, for its second season, I think, it was the highest rated show in syndication.

LAUREN: Yeah, wow, and so... They really make it He-Man's story for one to two episodes, but also they you know, they show him cooking, they show him having relationships with his mom, and like the women in his life, and he's, you know, not as bloated and masculine a character as I expected them to present him as? This show is very 80s, though, and I loved watching how some of this animation was so intense--You see Battlecat leap forward in this like, very violent and action-packed way, and then a monster grabs him and throws him, and the sound effect is still like ‘boing’! [laughs] They're just--the 80s were this time when cartoons were still for kids. There was no acknowledgement that cartoons can really be for grown-ups, so all the voices on this show are so goofy, all the sound effects are so goofy, and anytime it just starts to take itself seriously-- [affects a stupid cartoon voice] someone comes in with this voice! And you're like, oh, hello 1985.

Some of the things I want to talk about that you brought up--I I love. I'm so interested in that quote that calls the rebellion a band of patriots, because the one quote that I wrote down, was in episode one Bow, who is the token man who's costume I love, and I'm going to Dragon Con in September and if I don't see at least one I'll just cry--uh, the quote was:

[audio clip from SOTS]

HORDE SOLDIER: Surrender, citizen!

Bow: [chuckles] I'm not a citizen. I'm a rebel.

[end clip]

LAUREN: --and I--I’ve--I've been thinking about that for the last like 12 hours or so, because I would argue... that a patriot, who's fighting for justice and equality and freedom, is like... the ideal citizen? But this Rebellion is so disconnected from... the Horde, and the establishment, which I guess has been around for 20 years that they don't even call themselves like citizens of that regime, and I think that’s... that's striking, especially if you're talking about our current political climate? I think that's an accusation, often, that comes from both sides. If you're not--I'm going to say the T word--if you're not a Trump fan in 2017 you're not a patriot, but then the other side says, if you're supporting the tyranny of this, then you're not a patriot, and uh... these people in the Rebellion are patriots, but don't consider themselves citizens, and I want to hear what you think about that.

ERIC: Well, first of all, I like that you uh, caught that quote because I also--I just read the series Bible for the first time last night, and I had never... thought to refer to the Rebellion as patriots, and I think that that also kind of has... because you know under eight years of Obama-- that was what all the... angry people on the far right, ‘oh we're patriots’ and so I bet now... I mean I don't want to put too much on JMS's politics, but he probably was pretty lefty to to write the series Bible for this show. He might not use that word ‘patriot’ and I also think... First of all I really want to talk about Bow, and maybe this isn’t the episode for it, but just in general like that character of the token male and his crazy outfit and his-- his weird relationships. There's that moment in episode 3 where Adam's like oh I'm gonna go to the Fright Zone and find Adora, and he's like “Godspeed you on your quest, Adam!” and Adam's just kind of like “... Yeah cool man. Anyway I'm gonna go bye.”

[clip from SOTS]

BOW: You are a brave man, Adam. I salute you. Good fortune speed you on your mission.

ADAM: Yeah, uh... well thanks.

[end of clip]

LAUREN: He's just too extra, even for He-Man.

ERIC: Side note, Larry DiTillio in the series Bible mentions that Bo is kind of supposed to be the Adam figure on Etheria. Not the He-Man but the Adam, the kind of, ‘oh he he jokes around, he kind of slacks off, and he may be a little too earnest and he can't always back it up’... Anyway to the quote of “I'm not a citizen, I'm a rebel”. Yeah, nowhere in the show does it ever say ‘the Horde's been here 20 years”. It's just kind of an indeterminate amount of time. And there's episodes we'll watch later, where it seems clear that they are ‘the establishment’ and I think maybe that's the difference between the show and--well, that's clearly a difference between the show, and where we are in the world is you know the horde is -- they're straight, like -- they're not even making runs at being a democracy, like it's straight up tyranny. Uh, so I guess in that sense I think Bow’s quote is legit, but I think that's probably a way that, yeah, it is disconnected from... from the modern times, we are all still citizens even if we consider ourselves resisting the current power structure.

LAUREN: Right I feel like we all still believe in America, and our version of what America could be, at its best, and we all want to live in that place. You hear people who are like ‘well if you don't love it you should leave it’ none of us want to leave we just want this place that's our home to be better and include everyone. [[4]] And I'm--I--I guess in the end--not to skip way ahead, but that's She-Ra's choice as well. She's given the option to go to, sort of this idealized place, where the good guys, uh are already the force in power. In Eternia, He-Man's family is getting to rule--I mean they're--they’re menaced all the time by Skeletor, but they're... that's the king and the queen and... the good guys kind of make the government if you will. And She-Ra's like, no I can't stay, I'm choosing to go back to this tyrannical miserable place because my job there's not done, so I guess she is a citizen, she kind of insists she is.

ERIC: Yeah and I think that's really the crux of what drives this show, and you know we're gonna do an episode later on the-- the Price of Freedom, which if anybody listening is a She-Ra fan you'll be like ‘yeah that's the episode you have to do’ [[5]] but yeah that's the key difference in the show right is like She-Ra... she gets a taste of home in, I think, a very sweet moment and I also think a moment that if you are a He-Man fan kind of closes off--because even in the one episode you saw, you know there's this through line in the series, Prince Adam is always a disappointment to his dad because he can't let him--it be known that he's He-Man. So he's just kind of this jokey prince. And then he brings home their lost daughter and King Randor is like ‘you've made me so happy’ and I think all right, Adam's arc is done, like... he has fulfilled his job and completed his family. And Adora gets a couple days on Eternia and then Skeletor and Hordak come and try to take her away and she realizes she--if she if she stays, she's doing a disservice to the people who really need her, and I think that is it's awesome, like it's a great choice and it gives her so much more responsibility than than He-Man. And you know something that the writers keep noting is that whereas Adam and He-Man are two very different characters, Adora and She-Ra are basically the same. They're both very like duty-bound and honorable and uh, and noble.

LAUREN: I did notice that, which as a total newbie to this series brought about one of my major questions, which is: Why does her identity need to be a secret? I find Adora and She-Ra to be so similar and really the stakes--at least in this pilot--seem so low and it's... I don't know who else the Horde could think this mysterious warrior woman is, they're like ‘ah the princess escaped... and it's this lady's fault!’ and I [laughs] the--the--you really have to suspend your disbelief to like, let the alter ego thing even slide

ERIC: Oh I mean yeah, there's no way that the rebels shouldn't have figured out that Adam is He-Man okay. Prince Adam shows up he's like, ‘I have a friend who could help you fight!’ and then He-Man shows up, they rescue He-Man oh then Adam's back! And then He-Man comes back--it doesn't make any sense. I mean I guess if you really--because clearly the answer is that it’s the superhero trope, right.

LAUREN: Right.

ERIC: But if you really want to find an in-world answer, maybe it's to protect Adam's identity? I don't know. It--or maybe I mean if you want to dig psychologically, ‘cause Adora kind of doesn't have her own life, and so maybe she's trying to claim one for herself, to have her own identity and not be She-Ra, and there actually will be an episode we'll watch later that is about that duality.

LAUREN: I can buy that. I can buy that. Um. Speaking of the life that she doesn't have, one of the [laughs] most stone cold plot holes in this whole thing for me was that four people were allowed to keep the memory of Adora's existence, and everyone else didn't. So poor Teela is like, ‘no, who is this though’ and no one ever really like... stops to convince her or check in with her. There were two times during this pilot that I laughed just out loud by myself and that was one of them, because she really got a bad deal.

[clip from SOTS]

RANDOR: Well Adam we’ve done as you asked, now where is the surprise of yours? Must we wait all day?

ADAM: All right, you can open your eyes now.

TEELA: Who's that?

MAN-AT-ARMS: By the ancients!

RANDOR: It's about ti--[gasps]

MARLENA: Adora!!

ADORA: Mother! Father!

MARLENA: My daughter! Oh, my dear sweet daughter.

TEELA: Daughter?? [laughs uncertainly] I don’t understand.

MAN-AT-ARMS: Why, she’s Adora! Adam’s twin sister. And she’s back, after all this time!

MARLENA: Look at you! How lovely you are!

ADORA: Oh, Mother. I’m so glad Adam brought me here!

RANDOR: Son, I want you to know that today you’ve made me the happiest man on all Eternia. The royal family of Eternia is whole once more, and by the Ancients I swear that nothing shall ever separate us again.

SCENE TRANSITION: SHE-RA! [musical sting]

[end clip]

ERIC: What was the other time you laughed?

LAUREN: The other time I laughed... was the first time the horse... transformed into the Pegasus-unicorn. Is it Swift Wind?

ERIC: Swift Wind, yes.

LAUREN: And Swift Wind could suddenly talk. And had the--and had another goofy 80s voice. He's like, [affects a goofy 80s voice] ‘now, I'm Swift Wind’ and they go flying.

[clip from SOTS]

SWIFT WIND: I am Swift Wind, my dear friend.

LAUREN: But what made me laugh, not only was his voice, but the fact that it doesn't appear that he can talk when he's not transformed [laughs] and uh, and Battle Cat can. And so it's just another like raw deal that a character gets. [laughs] Like, ‘I lose my sentience when I'm not transformed’. Oh, my gosh. Poor Swift Wind. [[6]]

ERIC: I do want to say as far as the uh, the voice casting goes... So there's only six actors who work on the show. And one of them is the producer, and one of them is the producer's daughter. [[7]]

LAUREN: They really go for it.

ERIC: Yes.I--I appreciate the challenge. And, you know, everyone always kind of looks at these shows and say, ‘oh, these are the cheapest cartoons of the 80s’. And actually, the opposite was true. Filmation was the last studio to do all of their animation in America. And so it was very cost-prohibitive to hire a big voice cast, because they had to pay like, American wages to their animators and not just ship overseas.

LAUREN: You could see, though, where the great care was taken in the animation, and then sort of, where it wasn't? So similar to other 80s shows, like if you imagine Scooby Doo, and you see Shaggy and Scooby running, and the background is repeating itself over and over, um, in the like, Slave People. Those are the same slaves walking by over and over. And yet when He-Man disguises himself in a robot body, they take the time to draw like little tups of hair sticking out of his uniform. I was like, ‘oh, see, they had a budget. They just invested it in very specific places.’

ERIC: I love that that's a plot point, too, is that He-Man's hair gives him away at one point. I thought that that was so funny.

LAUREN: And it busts him really fast. I was expecting them to like... give him the benefit of the doubt and let him sneak around a little bit. And the second they see him, they're like, ‘that's He-Man. What an idiot.’

ERIC: Yeah. Fun f--I don't know if you or anybody listening will care, but Filmation had a--a system called Same-As. Same dash as, and it was their stock animation system. So anytime someone animated something they like, they would put it in like a file, and then they would use it in later episodes, again, because they thought, oh, this is a really great piece. We can keep using it and then we can, you know, put our efforts into something else next time. So that is why you saw like scenes of slaves just over and over again. So I want to know just at the very base level, like, did you see the twist coming about Adora's identity, and what did you think?

LAUREN: By the twist, do you mean, literally, that it's He-Man's sister?

ERIC: Yes.

LAUREN: So I thought it was pretty obvious, considering like one of the first scenes is the baby getting stolen. Like, who else would that baby be? I was actually more surprised when she was introduced as a bad guy, and I was trying to figure out, is she legitimately a bad guy who's going to need to go through sort of a massive change of heart, or is this just like a hypnosis situation? And the answer was both.

ERIC: Yeah.

LAUREN: It's both.

ERIC: Yeah. And I think, I think it says something, you know, probably for our purposes, one of the more interesting sequences is after He-Man is in prison--which by the way, there's a lot of being imprisoned, a lot of metaphors and literal imprisonment in this five part episode. When He-Man is at the--in prison and he tells Adora, ‘hey, just go see for yourself like what the world is like’, you know, she's like, ‘oh, I haven't really left the fright zone, but Hordak tells me that we're the rightful rulers and everyone likes us.’ And He-Man's like, ‘well, why don't you go see?’ I thought that was cool, even though the scenes of her investigating are sooo dramatic and like it's, you know, like an old guy who wants water and a trooper throws him in a lake. Like, yeah, that's horrible, but also it's like not really grave social injustice. You know?

LAUREN: Yeah. It was really on the nose in a way that, I mean, I loved, but was also so over-the-top because... one of those scenes is like an airplane just comes rolling up. And She-Ra’s like, ‘what's happening?’ And these two citizens in just the most exposition heavy dialogue are like, ‘well, John here was talking about how the taxes are way too high. And an evil robot overheard him and here comes an airplane to blow up his farm.’ [laughs

ERIC: Yeah, I was like, let's get this in really quick. Like 10 seconds in, Adora gets it.

[clip from SOTS]

ADORA: What's going on?

VILLAGER: Lars said the hordes taxes were too high and a trooper overheard him. Now they're going to destroy his home.

[explosion noises]

[end clip]

ERIC: Something you said at the beginning of our conversation that is really true. You know, as you pointed out, this is She-Ra's story. The whole kind of five-part pilot is about giving her control of the narrative. It's basically He-Man passing off the the torch, or the sword, as it were. And that had real-world implications as well as you deduce. It was a way to... because She-Ra clearly is marketed towards girls, but the people at Filmation really wanted boys to watch it. So they're like, all right, if we put He-Man in, maybe we'll trick the boys into thinking this is cool. And it totally worked. And I remember as a kid, I liked this show way more than He-Man. Even then, I deduced, like, this show... it's just richer. Like, it has this background--having the Horde and having the bad guys win. It's such a more interesting uh, background on which to tell different stories. So She-Ra was the second highest rated cartoon of the year it debuted, right behind G.I. Joe, which was a new show. It had a 4.3 share, which I think means 4.3 million people watched it every week, which is pretty good.

LAUREN: Yeah.

ERIC: So it totally worked. And I definitely at some point want to talk about the show's marketing of the toys, and how much of a failure that was. But as far as just on the show, like, I think it's pretty uniquely positioned to appeal to all genders.

LAUREN: Absolutely. And I'm interested in seeing where it succeeds and where it fails, as a feminist piece. Because even in this pilot, there were moments that were so strong and there were moments that totally whiffed, because there'd be quotes like, ‘that's not very ladylike’ or ‘just like a woman’. And I would say they were like 50-50 for, ‘no, you're supposed to think that's evil and dumb’. And then suddenly, like, He-Man would put his finger to She-Ra's lips and you're supposed to be like, ‘oh, that's okay’. And it's not. It's just like weird and sexist. And so they're trying so hard, and I want to see kind of what their success rate is going to be throughout the series, because it's bumping along.

ERIC: I completely agree, and I knew you were going to bring up--it--it is--And I just said it was one of my favorite scenes. And yet I still regret the unfortunate dialogue that's ‘not very ladylike, but then again, you're not much of a lady anyway’. [laughs] Although Scorpia of all the Horde villains, my least favorite. I do not like her. That voice, [affects a Scorpia voice] ‘oh, she talks like this, like she's from Brooklyn kind of’.

LAUREN: The vill--the side villains, I kept... I mean, all the side characters, so many mascots, which was very 80s, we got to make as many potential toys as possible. But so many just like... Catra: She's a cat. Angel-la: She's an angel.

ERIC: Broom is a broom.

LAUREN: [laughs] Yeah. There was also, the other like--most 80s thing about this was how violent, but nonviolent it was. There was some violent animation happening. But it was like, ‘they're just stunned’. The one guy whose powers is just eye beams? He has the eye beams that threw off He-Man's sense of balance. And I was like, either he is just like messing with He-Man's inner ear a little bit, or he's giving him brain damage. And I don't know, like [laughs]

ERIC: It's such like Warner Brothers style violence.

LAUREN: Well, right. And this, the big ‘Magna Ray’ was apparently going to affect an entire forest, but is also stopped with a rock.

ERIC: Yes.

LAUREN: And I'm like, all right.

ERIC: And then Hordak has enough power for a second shot, which was never mentioned before, because he drained just enough to get it to work one. I don't, there's a couple subplots, like I love the overall through line of He-Man finding She-Ra. The Magna Beam, the harpies. Oh my God, that harpy scene. I do not like it at all.

LAUREN: No.

ERIC: Um. Too--Earlier, you mentioned, you know, 50-50 on the dialogue being either they're calling out sexism, or it's just casually sexist.

LAUREN: Yeah.

ERIC: The other example you mentioned that wasn't He-Man, I think is really interesting because there's a lot of that in the scene when Adora is captured by Skeletor, and she's in Snake Mountain. And then as She-Ra, she fights her way out. And I--I almost feel like that scene, it's at the start of the fifth episode--To me, it's like almost consciously, and maybe I'm giving the writer too much credit--bringing femininity to Masters of the Universe, because it's so on-the-nose.

[clip from SOTS]

SKELETOR: And now, princess, I must decide what to do with you.

ADORA: [fake swooning noise as she fake passes out]

BEAST MAN: Uh. She’s fainted.

SKELETOR: Hah! Just like a woman!

[end clip]

[start new clip from SOTS]

BEAST MAN: You’re sure a pretty princess. [gross laugh] It’s too bad we have to lock you up in the dungeon.  

[end clip]

ERIC: Like, it's just so creepy. And then... and--when she's busting out She-Ra goes, ‘no one around here knows how to treat a lady’. And of course, the scene is capped by a true 80s villain defeat. Everyone is just laughing at Skeletor as he says, [affects a Skeletor voice] ‘ah, a female He-Man--

ERIC AND LAUREN IN UNISON: [both doing Skeletor impressions] ‘This is the worst day of my life!’

ERIC: And like, that's the end of the scene. That's like, no, he's a criminal.

LAUREN: Yeah [laughs]

ERIC: Why aren't you doing anything?

LAUREN: He's the big bad of this universe.

ERIC: Right.

[clip from SOTS]

TEELA: Hmph. I don't believe this.

SKELETOR: Neither do I. A female He-Man. [pitiful whining] This is the worst day of my life!

TEELA AND MAN-AT-ARMS: [laugh at Skeletor]

[end clip]

LAUREN: I was trying to... also decide, and I think this is something I'm going to wrestle with through most of this show. Uh, because my personal brand of feminism really tries to live by... a woman can be whatever she wants. If she wants to show her body, if she wants to cover it up, it's all fine. If she wants to be promiscuous, if she wants to be conservative, it's all fine. Be a mother, don't, get married, don't, I don't care. Feminism is, you're supposed to be able to do just whatever you please, because you're free. And I feel like pretty often we scoff at, when a woman is stereotypically feminine, and I think that's a mistake. And there's a moment where a big skull falls on top, it's like an animal skull falls on top of Skeletor. The thing that She-Ra says is like, ‘well, I think that's an improvement to your look’ and I'm like, wait, why is she concerned with aesthetic? Like why is she making like, cute jokes? And I struggled with it for a second, and then I went, no, it's great that she's feminine. It's great that she feels empowered in being a little bit about aesthetic. Like that's fine. And I feel like I'm going to have that conversation with myself a lot while watching this.

ERIC: I do not think you are wrong about that. Maybe it will make you feel better to know--And again, you know, I'm of the critical school of thought that intent only means so much. It's a window into something, b--into interpretation but it's not the be-all end-all. That said, I did find it interesting to see how keyed-in these writers were to the things that we would be talking about. So here's a Larry DiTilio, who again wrote four fifths of this pilot said: “I think the way you make things girl-friendly is you don't worry about the fact that she's a girl. You let her do what everybody else does. Everybody was equal on the show. We wanted a show where many times women were not only the equal of men, but the superiors of men.” And that's something that Lou Scheimer also echoes, like, his whole point ‘wasn't feminism’--which I disagree with--but he just wanted to show that women could do anything that they wanted. And I think that you do see that in the show. I think there's a huge variety of women characters of all types.

LAUREN: Yes, absolutely. And I'm glad to see so many female characters, on the good side, on the bad side because it gives them the chance to have diverse aesthetics, diverse intention, diverse personality. And I mean, that's sort of... I guess my final observation is how many things She-Ra IS being successful at that we're still struggling with today. Uh, when I went and saw Star Wars Episode 7, I remember feeling so moved by how many women I just saw standing in the ranks of the Empire, and standing in the ranks of the Rebellion, just existing within the space of this world, and how especially in... sort of geek culture things that's still sometimes rare. And this is so many years later, and the second we see the Horde, there's girls. And the second we see the Rebellion, there's girls. And this is a very action packed show, you know, girls punching, kicking, flying, riding. And... the fact that I feel like marketing professionals in toys and media today are still questioning whether or not young women can enjoy that is shocking. Because this, you know... this was literally before I was on this earth, this show started.

ERIC: It was 32 years ago, which is crazy. And it... Yeah, just kind of, I don't want to say effortlessly, because that takes away from the work of people who, you know, put the effort in. But seemingly easily is perfectly integrated. It's great. Now that--there is a huge caveat, and we're going to do an episode on this, but I need to mention it now, because I know someone's going to bring it up. She-Ra is super hashtag white feminism. This is a very white show. Now the series Bible even mentions that there should be ‘people of all colors’. And I don't know whether it was the animators, or just something at loss in translation, didn't happen. So there's an episode that kind of head-on deals with taking away a black character and making her a pink character. [[9]] We'll talk about that later.

LAUREN: People of all colors, you know, like purple and green.

ERIC: And that's kind of the fantasy trope that is unfortunate about She-Ra, right? That's one of the very 80s things is like, yeah, they’re all--there are all colors, but not real life colors. You have white, and then you have fantasy colors.

LAUREN: Yeah, I mean, 80s nostalgia is really hip right now. You have your Stranger Things and your Glow. And I've watched Glow very recently too. And sort of remembered that... in the late 80s, early 90s, there was this message of equality and freedom and like, togetherness. And it was like, ‘yeah, racism is over’. And then you realize like, no, the way society presented race was far, far from perfect we’re far from done with it. And so I think there's a lot of difference between saying ‘our show is for everyone’ and actually creating a show that is for everyone.

ERIC: 100%. And you know, I would still argue that She-Ra's heart was in the right place and compared to the other--like Transformers, G.I. Joe, He-Man, Thundercats, it did better, you know.

LAUREN: Mhm.

ERIC: But it still had a long way to go. That said, I'm really glad that you found... that you saw what I saw in this show. That it has troubles, but... It's pretty good, right?

LAUREN: It is!

ERIC: It's pretty good.

LAUREN: I'm going to DragonCon at the end of August and I was like, ‘is anyone cosplaying She-Ra? There's an 80s cartoon photo shoot. I should go talk to those guys. I mean, I wonder if there's going to be a She-Ra’. And that was after one sitting with this show. [laughs]

ERIC: So, yeah, I guess, like I said, this episode is going to be longer than the others, because we're just getting into it. But to close out, I'd like to know like, are you looking forward to exploring the rest of the show now?

LAUREN: I am. I'm looking forward to especially meeting more characters because I believe the implication was, we freed one castle, but there's going to be more kingdoms, with more people. And I did some spoiler-free googling and there's like a mermaid and an ice lady. And for one, I was like, ‘oh man, look at all these toys they could manufacture’. But on the other, I was just excited to see, you know, we already have so many female characters and the show is going to give us even more and I'm stoked to meet them.

ERIC: Yeah, absolutely. So I will mention, kind of the plan for this show going forward is after my Wonder Woman binge, I went through and I have an embarrassing amount of books on He-Man and She-Ra. So I read through and I'm like, OK, this seems like this would be good. So we're going to talk about episodes that kind of directly address progressive issues first. And then... I think if you guys like this show, Lauren and I talked about going back and doing all the episodes. It's 65 episodes on Netflix. That's a lot. So hopefully you guys like this and then, uh... we'll have a lot of fun. And I do want to point out even in the episodes that are directly addressing issues that we care about, there's a lot of failures and we're not going to sugarcoat things. But I think that when we really get to the dregs of She-Ra, that might be when the really... like, the claws come out. So we'll see where this show goes.

LAUREN: Well, I do believe that you should be critical of the things that you love. And so I'm sure there will be moments that I sound like I hate this, but I--I really only give even the time of day to things that are worth it. And this seems like it's going to be worth it.

ERIC: 100 % agree. And you know, I told Lauren when we were planning, I don't want this to fall into the unfortunately gendered dynamic of like, ‘guy likes it, lady nags on it’. And I don't think that's what's going to happen because I think we're both being pretty real about the show.

LAUREN: It's going to be ALL nagging, all genders, all nagging.

ERIC: But like, I don't know. I mean, you--you just experienced this in 2017, right? And you are a professional woman, got a lot going on. You're an established person, and you like the show. And to me, that says even 32 years later, this has some potential.

LAUREN: Yes. And you know, when I'm watching it and my husband walks into the room and just out of context, he's a muscly He-Man like tied to a table and he's like, ‘what are you watching?’ That just that that alone was worth taking on this project.

ERIC: So much bondage. All right. So next episode next week, we're going to do Duel at Devlan. So please feel free to follow along on Netflix. We'd love to hear your thoughts. We actually don't have anything set up to do that at this point, but we'll post some way for you to get at us, uh, when, you know, with the episodes. So, yeah, talk back to us as long as you have constructive things to say, good or bad, we'd love to hear them.

LAUREN: Yeah, this was awesome. I can't wait to watch the next episode. Thank you. Thank you for this idea.

ERIC: Yeah. Thanks for doing it. Hell yeah.

[clip from SOTS]

HE-MAN: Farewell, She-Ra, Princess of Power.

SHE-RA: Farewell, He-Man, dear brother.

[end clip]

LAUREN: Do we do we have a moral today?

ERIC: Oh, yeah. So that's something that's going to be coming up is uh, moral segments, because as you know, these 80 shows like typically have morals at the end. The pilot forgoes morals. So there isn't one baked into the show, but I don't know, if you were to assign a moral to today's episode, what would you say?

LAUREN: Oh my gosh. I think, I mean, this is so cheesy, but that's the 80s. I think the moral would be... be open to everything, be willing to try new things and confront new experiences with an open mind, because when Eric presented me this idea, I literally was like, ‘that's the weirdest thing I ever heard. I have to sleep on it’. And by morning, I was--I was ready. And I'm just so glad to say yes. I'm so glad to be open to a new experience.

ERIC: At first I thought you were going to relate that to like Adam's experiences of like, you know, ‘he did it with the Sorceress and it worked out’, but I like that it was a real life moral too.

[EPISODE OUTRO]

Thanks for listening to She-Ra, Progressive of Power. If you like our show, you can write and review us on Apple Podcast. We'd super appreciate it. You can also send us any feedback you have, add it to our email address, progressiveofpower@gmail.com, or as a comment on our website at progressiveofpower.wordpress.com. And make sure you listen to the show all the way through to the end. In future episodes, we're going to use this space to promote progressive organizations and causes we like a lot, related to the topics we're talking about, that can help make the world a better place. But for now, just enjoy this rad theme music.

[outro to "I Have the Power”][[10]]

ERIKA SCHEIMER AND NOAM KANIEL: [As She-Ra and He-Man] For the honor of love, we have the power so can you.

ANNOTATIONS

[[1]] This is an anecdote from Lou Scheimer: Creating the Filmation Generation, page 230, about his approach to creating female characters in general. Erika Scheimer, the daughter referenced, went onto work for Filmation herself, and in 2007 came out as a lesbian, calling Filmation “one of the gayest places in town”.  

[[2]] This is actually where things get complicated, because multiple people have claimed responsibility for the ‘long lost twin’ element, including Lou Scheimer on the very page cited in footnote 1. We know on the Mattel side at least that she was initially slated to be Teela’s long-lost twin, not Adam’s, which further tangles the narrative on the Filmation side. Larry DiTillio also claimed credit for the twin plot point, though he described it more as ‘filching’ from Star Wars. He and J. Michael Straczynski developed the world of She-Ra, so I think we can safely afford them the bulk of the credit, but Lou Scheimer had long wanted to create a female-led action show, and to build off of He-Man’s success--while on the Mattel side of things, Janice Varney-Hamlin had been trying to get a female action figure line greenlit for some time. She claimed it was her idea to build off of He-Man but there’s little (no) evidence of that and she’s... a gifted marketer, shall we say.

[[3]] This reactive vs. proactive bit is a reference to something Larry DiTillio has said a few times, about his intentions for the story. I just like that they did research for this podcast it makes me really happy. Here’s a link to the series bible.

[[4]]

[[5]] The Price of Freedom is one of a handful of episodes that make you ask, “the censors wouldn’t let them hit people but they were allowed to do this?” Basically, the Horde attacks Dryl. She-Ra calls the Sorceress for backup (He-Man), but they can do little more than evacuate the villagers into the nearby mines. She-Ra leaves to get help, because now they’re pinned there and Dryl itself is burned to the ground, but naturally Hordak blasts the shit out of He-Man and traps everybody in the mines. They start getting testy when their air starts running out, some of them are like ‘where the hell is She-Ra’, but one of the villagers gives this big rousing speech about how they can’t always rely on She-Ra and He-Man to fix all their problems, and they dig to safety. Or, they would, except they cause a cave-in, which is less a metaphor and more a reason for She-Ra to return (without any help).

[[6]] It could be worse! In the German audio plays, he couldn’t even talk as Swift Wind. But don’t worry, Filmation dropped the restriction pretty early on & we got the goofy 80s voice talking horse we all wanted.

[[7]] The aforementioned Lou and Erika Scheimer.

[[8]] Larry DiTillio said this on the 2007 BCI DVD’s "Documentary Feature - The Stories of She-Ra Part 1″. And boy is it concerning I recognized it so quickly.

[[9]] I think he means Huntara? ‘Pink’ is kind of a stretch but she was originally supposed to be black, per both Larry DiTillio & the character design sheet. They were going for a Grace Jones vibe. I guess we’ll find out in a later episode.

[[10]] Official theme song of the Secret of the Sword movie. There’s a music video and it’s incredible. Fair warning this gets stuck in my head constantly so if you’re susceptible to that... tread carefully. I linked you to the version with Erika Scheimer explaining the background of the song to force you to learn <3 don’t skip ahead that’s cheating

[tmandpm]

MAJOR SMUT ALERT!!! Here is one of three I’ll be posting tonight. No disrespect intended. Just fun.

…………………

They had just gotten home from some charity gala. Philip had stood by his wife, wrapped an arm around her, and posed for photographs, but on the inside he was angry and hurt. Theresa had noticed it since yesterday, and he hardly talked, let alone touched, her unless he had to for the past 48 hours.

Theresa had kicked her shoes off as soon as they got home. Her feet were killing her, and the corset-like top she was wearing was hurting her back. She took her coat off and hung it on the coat rack, “Philip, could you help me get this damned top off?” She spun around when there was no answer. Her husband was already gone. She went in search of him and found him in the en-suite on their bedroom. He had stripped down to his boxers and was brushing his teeth. “Baby?” she called.

“What is it, Theresa?” he bit back.

Theresa stood in shocked silence. He never acted this way. Ever. “What’s wrong? You’ve been acting so strange lately. Especially tonight,” she said, voice quivering.

Philip spit the toothpaste out and washed his mouth before he pushed past his wife, saying rather harshly, “I don’t know. Check the date.”

‘The date?’ she wondered. Then it clicked, “Our anniversary.”

“Yes. That thing,” he said, yanking their bedclothes back.

Theresa rushed to her husband’s side, grabbing his hand and turning him to face her. “Oh, Philip. I’m so sorry. I completely forgot.”

“I noticed.”

“I’ve just been so wrapped up in the Commons and this charity gala,” she stopped, looking at her husband. She saw the hurt and anger in his eyes, and it made her feel even worse. “That’s still no excuse. I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?”

“Unless you can magically time travel, no,” he said sitting on the bed.

Theresa came to rest on her knees before him, hands laid on his bare thighs, “Please forgive me. I didn’t mean to. You know that.”

Philip looked at his wife. ‘She really is beautiful,’ he thought. An idea flashed through his mind. “Take off your top,” he commanded.

Theresa jerked her head up, staring into her husband’s blue eyes that were darkened with anger and something she couldn’t quite place. “Wh-what?”

Philip ran a hand through her hair before leaning down and whispering close to her ear, “Take off the top.”

Theresa’s hands went to the tiny eyelets that ran down her back and pushed them together, immediately releasing her from the royal blue contraption. She took a deep breath as her body adjusted to the larger, more normal, flow of air going into her lungs. She pulled the satin fabric away from her and felt her nipples become hardened at the touch of the cool air.

“Now get on the bed,” he growled out. Theresa looked back into his eyes when she recognized that other thing, lust. She immediately felt herself become drenched in the flow black trousers. Without hesitation, she pulled herself up and onto the bed. Philip stood, facing his wife, “Take off the pants.”

She quickly undid them and slid down her legs, leaving her in nothing but black lace knickers and oversized diamond earrings. Philip stepped between her opens legs and squatted, bring him to eye level with Theresa, “Do you really want to make it up to me?” She nodded. “Then do everything I say.” Another nod. “Let me see you,” he said tearing her underwear.

Theresa gasped. Of course she and Philip had experimented in the bedroom. They had been married a long time, and they were fairly open minded people, she like to think. But she had never seen her husband take complete control over her. She liked it. Philip looked down at his wife’s center, “Mmm. All nice and pink.” He ran a finger up and down her, causing Theresa to throw her head back, “And so, so wet.”

“Please, Philip.”

He brought his hand to cover her mouth, “Shhh. Remember, everything I say. Lay down on the bed.”

Theresa scooted up until her head was resting on the pillows, body perfectly centered, and legs wide open. “Now what?”

“You’re very eager to please.” Philip looked his wife up and down, “Touch yourself.”

Shocked momentarily but soon recovering, Theresa let her hands start on her breasts. She gently kneaded them before pinching her nipples, making them tighter. Her hands wandered down her stomach, coming to rest on the shortly shorn mound between her legs. With her left hand, she spread herself open and used to her right hand to rub her hardened clit. She gasped at the sensation.

Philip was enthralled by the sight of his wife doing this. His boxers were tented with his erection. He quickly pushed them down his legs and stepped out of them before grasping his hardened member and stroking. The moans his wife was making was enough to send anyone over the edge, and he so desperately wanted to be inside of her.

Theresa felt herself start clenching and then it hit her. That wonderful feeling of falling and not caring. She kept rubbing herself, stretching the pleasure out. When she came down, she blushed. Realizing she hadn’t masturbated since college. In fact, since she and Philip had dated. She remembered how they had both wanted to take things slow and steady, but after dark, when her roommate was asleep, she would slip her hands underneath the comforter and rub herself until she came with a silent scream. She glanced up to see her husband staring at her, hand firmly around his penis. God, he was sexy.

She started to get up when Philip said, “No. stay right there.” He climbed towards her from the bottom of the bed before settling himself in the open space her legs had between them. He pressed his lips to her rather roughly, teeth clinking. He pinned her arms above her head with one hand while the other went for something on his nightstand.

Theresa opened her eyes as he pulled back from the kiss to see him holding the lanyard he had gotten for the Conservative conference. There was a twinkle in his eye as he wrapped it around her wrists before tying it to the iron posts of the headboard.

“You can’t be serious?” she asked.

“Completely, Dear,” he replies as he propped himself up on his elbows over her. “Now, tell me, does The Right Honorable Lady want me inside of her?”

A very enthusiastic nod and then groan as Philip pushed in. She struggled against her restraint as pleasure overwhelmed her. Philip pulled out before slamming back into her. They both knew this would leave bruises, and they couldn’t care less. He bit her neck breaking skin, and Theresa yelped. The pain was such a good contrast. She unraveled right then and there when Philip licked the shell of her ear and whispered, “You’re so tight and warm and wet. Be a good girl, huh, and come for me.”

Oh, how she did. Screaming and thrashing her head about she came harder than she ever thought possible. They both felt the gush of wetness from her as her back arched, and every muscle in her body went taught. The intense clenching and the feel of the velvet of his wife around him made Philip groan as spurt after spurt left his body and went into hers. He collapsed on top of her, untying her hands as he did so.

Theresa let her hands run through her husband’s hair before taking his glasses and putting them on the nightstand. She gently pulled the heavy earrings off and threw them on the floor to find in the morning. “Do you forgive me?” She asked still breathless. Makeup be damned. She’ll take it off in the morning too.

From his position of his head on his wife’s chest, he wrapped his arms around her waist before kissing the valley between her breasts and saying, “More than.”

[team-heavenly]

Chapter 3

Hold B to speed up dialogue!

(The white text did NOT show up well here, so take my shitty edit.)

Now this is going to be a long post because there’s a LOT of new characters and oddities for me to share. You better set aside some time for this one.

(Because of this, from now on I will no longer be taking strictly plot-related pictures. We all know how the game goes anyway.)

PART TWO IS HERE.

😱 I can only imagine! Who knows what kind of crazy characters are out there? Plusle running wild... Budew gangs... Snubbull thieves?!

Tropius gives the order for Beedrill to show us around...

Tom Sawyer Beedrill... I love it.

So we start the tour. It’s about as boring as you remember, except:

The WHERE?! Does Guildmaster Totodile keep rubber bands in here or something?

I’m a HUGE fan of the replacement title for Treasure Town though

Nautical Cottage. It’s by the sea, bitches.

Although weirdly, Andrea clips back into the prime universe for a second:

🤷‍♀️ Yeah idk. Not even the weirdest thing that happened today.

Introducing the Treasure Town Nautical Cottage cast! Starring:

Tyrogue Bank!

Gulpin Link Shop! Hey this isn’t Pokémon Square!

FISH STORE FISH STORE COME GET YA GOODS AT THE FISH STORE!!

And Blastoise Storage!

(I’m never gonna stop gushing over Southern Beedrill. Just FYI.)

I like to imagine the scales above his eyes popping up every time he says “Hey hey hey!”

Chic girl Psyduck! Personal headcanon: she says “Oh my gosh!” every time her headache gets bad :(

Just for funsies, I decided to check out who runs the Dojo

Dang, one more evolution and this would’ve been perfect 😔

I’m not sure if anyone else cares about the various Treasure Town Exploration Teams, but I do! So we’re taking an inventory. Sorry, not sorry.

Believe it or not, I pretty much remember who is who based on the dialogue. (Look, it was bound to happen after playing through this game literally a dozen times as a kid.) Feel free to correct me if I’m wrong, but I think Sunkern is Pidgey and Magmar is Seedot!

For Team Tasty, we have Natu as Swellow and Wailmer as Wurmple. Which makes this extra hilarious:

Imagining a bird the size of an orb swallowing a beach ball sized whale whole... I’m not an artist, someone please draw this.

Socially friendly Toxicroak as Vigorith

For Team Ebony, we have Meditite as Murkrow and Rhyhorn as Shuppet.

I go to drop my stuff off at Blastoise Storage and...

Yeah. Here we see the real consequence of my needing to toggle the NPC portraits option. Unfortunate, but necessary. (Does that mean all the vendors are... imposters?!)

This is this first ever inventory from the Finneon Market! Does anyone know where you normally pick up the Miracle Chest? Because I’ve never seen it before. (Granted, I never did the harder dungeons like Zero Isle.) I ultimately bought the pure seed and heal seed.

And then we trigger the arrival of the adorable brothers! I can’t wait to see who they are...

Oh okay! I could see it! Uh, maybe not them being brothers, but I can easily tell which one is Marill and which one is Azu-

...Just kidding. That is objectively hilarious omfg

But then suddenly... ambiguous prophecy time!

Andrea: “Lol bet”

Finally, I get to check what the other Finneon is selling and UHHHHHH-

ONE OF THE SEVEN TREASURES,

AND A LEGENDARY ITEM.

I checked the description just out of curiosity and-

Onix Village?! 😂 I cannot wait for post game.

The team stumbles upon the kiddos, striking up a conversation with a good samaritan who promises to help find their lost item! And who is this shady benevolent character?!

Oh. Oh this is beautiful. With Blizzard, the boss fight is gonna be a cinch!

Uh, I mean-

Yeah. Sure. Let’s go with nice.

An entire line for a measly ‘t. Nice.

So here’s something neat! I found three Pokémon at the Crossroads that let you view the randomizer settings, the program credits, and the art credits!  I’m not sure if these Pokémon are set or if they were also randomized, but it’s a neat feature nonetheless.

Here’s my seed again, but remember you can always find it in my profile description and my pinned post.

A quick look at Team Glee before we kickstart the mission. We have Geodude as Togepi, Nuzleaf as Ledyba(?), and Carvanha as Politoed(?).

Andrea? That’s not a Sandshrew 🤨

(On a more serious note, it totally makes sense the in-game art would be untouched. That would be way too hard to mess with.)

Ack! Not Meganiu!

We find out our Mt. Bristle equivalent is Everlasting Bolt-hole. (Maybe this chapter should be “The One with the Large Hole.”) The first floor had the most incredible soundtrack btw.

The first Kecleon Shop! (This is yet another item I’ve never seen before?) The white text in the bottom right corner doesn’t show up as well as it did originally so: the gold box in the center is Lost Loot. Priced at 9999!

This is what I mean about the vast majority of items being sticky in a dungeon. This will kill me someday, I guarantee it.

Upon reaching Level 12, Andrea tried to learn Nightmare. Without any sleep inducing moves, it’s pretty much pointless. I declined the move.

Wacky floor arrangement aside, here’s an interesting item I didn’t even know had art for it: the raffle tickets from Spinda’s Cafe! (You may need to zoom in to see it.)

On reaching 8F...

Thaaaat’s right, another mandatory Monster House.

Alas, this time we weren’t so lucky.

I took the L. It only seemed fair.

So, for the first time ever, I returned to the Guild after failing a mission. And I discovered loads of new dialogue along the way.

(Do NOT make a NSFW joke out of this, I SWEAR TO GOD-)

I don’t know why the game makes the day turn over before you can try again. In-world, it just doesn’t make any sense. Gee, I guess I should be glad Sandshrew has the civility to put his petty scheme on hold and wait for us.

This was probably the worst of it:

A legendary talking down to me after I got ambushed by a Monster House.

Et tu, Pineco?

(I’ve nearly hit the image limit for desktop so find the rest of Chapter 3 here!)

[bigskydreaming]

William Cobb is a total asshat and I hate him, thanks, BUT I will admit there’s a particular AU that’s been dancing around my Brain Cave for a few years that’s like.....hmmm.

Okay, so he’s a full on douchebag, but imagine if he was a full on douchebag who in this AU did still have an actual soft spot for family instead of drinking the Kool-Aid and thinking like ‘being the 1%’s elite murder moppet is actually the greatest honor I could ever hope for myself or any descendant of mine’ he’s like.....not awful about the subject of family and is like ‘well I’M a terrible person, but I will fight for my family’s right to choose to not be a terrible person, because like, they’re family, and its their life to fuck up if they want to be all weird about it or whatever.’

So BASICALLY, what I’m getting at is like, so, the Court was all into nabbing the Gray Son after Dick’s parents died, and William Cobb for once in his miserable existence experienced like, actual Internal Conflict about this because he’s like oh nooooo, but my great grandson is so cute actually and I can speak with some authority to the fact that if the Court gets their hands or requisite-Talons-pun on him, that like.....will not last long.

But then he breathes an undead sigh of relief or whatever the equivalent for him is when Bruce Wayne, one of the most powerful figures in the city, powerful enough for the Court to be wary about picking a fight with him, like, randomly swoops in and makes with the adopting of said great grandson.

And the Court’s like, ugh, what is this feeling of being denied something we want simply because we think we should have it? Do Not Like, 10/10 would absolutely NOT recommend, except to mortal enemies we hate. But whatever. I GUESS Bruce Wayne can keep the brat, but only because we simply don’t care enough to make a big deal about it and definitely not because we’re intimidated by his own power and family prestige. Cuz we’re totally not. We’re not! Shut up.

BUT.

THEN.

YEARS LATER.

The Court is engaged in active conflict with the Batfamily, and his Internal Conflict appeased and years behind him, Cobb’s like, all into the fight and giving it his all, until Something Plot Contrivey happens to unmask Nightwing and Cobb’s like. Oh shit. That’s my great grandson. CURSE YOU, SUDDEN BUT INEVITABLE RESURGENCE OF INTERNAL CONFLICT! NOBODY FUCKING ASKED, JEEZ.

And Dick’s just like.....uh, what’s happening right now? I feel like I’m missing context. Can a bitch get an MLA citation here or something?

All of this culminating in Cobb maybe not HELPING the Batfam demolish the Court but perhaps at least oh so conveniently not NOT helping when the Batfam delivers a metaphorical death blow to the Court O’Assholes. Like, the Grandmaster dipshit calls him on his celly to be like COBB! THE COURT HAS BEEN BREACHED! COME DEFEND YOUR MASTERS and Cobb’s like bzzrt....click....whrrrr....sorry going through a tunnel can’t hear you oh no dropped my phone in the sewers, signal lost, much regret.

And he just happens to arrive to the fight too late to change the outcome and he’s like oh dang, did I miss it? Shucks, I KNEW I shouldn’t have taken the freeway. My bad, guys. This one’s on me.

Because of Plot Contrivancey then, by this point the Batfam knows who this dude is and they let him go with a shovel talk like we still know about all the murder, FYI, and we’re doing this for Dick’s sake not yours, so you better not do ANY murder from here on out or its on sight.

And Cobb’s like okay first off, you’re not the fucking boss of me, but secondly, like, eh, whatever. I’m fucking old. I can retire. Its fine.

BUT because being a lying liar who lies about just kicking back and taking it easy and having hobbies is literally encoded into the Grayson DNA, he fucking lies like a lying liar who lies, and after trying to pick up fly fishing for like, two whole hours before calling it quits, he decides to devote his undead golden years to stalking his great-grandson like the creepiest guardian angel that literally nobody ever asked for. Dick included.

Dick keeps trying to like, Old Yeller this situation and is like GO HOME! You GO home now! Go on! But Cobb’s just not having it and he accidentally kills another up-and-coming Rogue who sets his sights on Nightwing. Great-Grandson and Great-Grandpa engage in heated stare-off, Battle of The Wills. Batman arrives and clears his throat menacingly. Cobb’s like oh no I’m so scared, I would totally be sweating right now if I weren’t physiologically incapable of sweating and oh yeah DYING.

And then its Cobb and Bruce engaging in the Battle of the Wills: Grudge Match edition, because they’re both glaring each other down while thinking the identical thoughts of “ugh the literal worst person in the world made one point and one point only and that’s that we must protect this mutually loved person at all costs and taking each other down would ultimately only deprive said loved one of a protector who could like, be key in protecting him from some future Murder Demise or whatnot” which segues neatly into both Bruce and Cobb shaking their fists at the sky and being all CURSE YOU, SUDDEN BUT INEVITABLE RESURGENCE OF INTERNAL CONFLICT! NOBODY FUCKING ASKED, JEEZ.

And Dick’s like, okay I can see you’re both very busy right now and this is no longer about me really so I’m just gonna leave you to it and go get ice cream with Damian. I’ll check back in a couple of hours to see if either of you has blinked yet, I guess? Idk. Whatever. You guys do you.

“My family is so fucking weird,” he grumbles under his breath as he walks off into the sunset. His siblings apparate into his presence, mouths open and ready to argue the comparative greater weirdness of their grafted branch of the Wayne family tree and he’s just like first person to bust out a flow-chart isn’t getting any ice cream, FYI, but because they’re all the kids of a billionaire who can be counted on to give them some spending money of a few hundred or so with just a puppy eyes look and a “why yes, Bruce, a hundred dollars IS the price of one banana,” like, they are not actually phased by this threat and it all swiftly devolves into ‘Whose Relatives Are Like, The WORST Worst’ competition that nobody will ever win, not that that actually matters.  

Its like, the Wayne Family Forever War. Just family tradition at this point. You get it.

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from the Lost Tomb part 6.1

🎶 Back on the bullshit I never got off🎶

Is this another unnecessary story arc?? With three sections??

Yes.

Wushanju Crew Chat

Wang Meng: You know, I’m someone who appreciates consistency in my day. My life is pleasant, very few issues indeed if you ignore the big ones. And yet. Yet here we are. With unresolved messes at the end of a day.

Wang Pangzi: SOMETHIN YOU NEED TO SAY MARY POPPINS

Wang Meng: We need to talk about Huo Daofu and the glittery bead curtain.

Wang Pangzi: MY FAVE TEEN WIZARD SERIES

Wu Xie: did you turn on that suggested word thingy lol

What glittery bead curtain

Wang Meng: I closed the shop at 6:00pm this evening on the dot. I locked all of the doors in and out of the shop very carefully, especially in light of recent events. The hall leading to the back office was empty. I filed the day’s paperwork, updated and sent emails, and then spent an extra hour organizing receipts and dusting. When I came back out, there were glittery iridescent bead curtains over the front entrance to the shop.

What could this mean?

Wu Xie: uh that you need to spend less time at work?

Wang Pangzi: LOOKS LIKE WE GOT ONE FOR THE DETECTIVES. THE MYSTERY OF THE BEDAZZLED THRESHOLD COMMENCES

Wu Xie: I think we can be relatively secure in thinking a glittery bead curtain isn’t a hostile threat

Wang Pangzi: SAYS YOU

I REMEMBER YE OLDE EXPLORATION TIMES HOW FAST THINGS GOT FURIOUS

BEANBAG CHAIRS SET AFLAME AND LEFT ON DOORSTEPS AS A WARNING

GLITTERBOMBS FOR DAYS

PANIC AT THE DISCO

Wang Meng: Ugh, forget it. I should have just taken them down, regardless of who they belong to.

Zhang Qiling: They are not mine.

Wang Pangzi: A BOLD STATEMENT COMING FROM OUR PRIME SUSPECT

SOMEONE QUICK GO DRAW CHALK AROUND THE DOORWAY TO MARK THE SCENE OF THE CRIME

Wang Meng: Do we know anyone who *would* sneak in and put those up? For whatever reason, legal or not? Even as a joke?

Wang Pangzi: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING WHETHER WE KNOW ANYONE WHO IS CHAOTIC, AN OUTLAW, A PRANKSTER AND/OR SNEAKS INTO PLACES

BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN OUR SUSPECT LIST IS LITERALLY EVERYONE WE KNOW EXCEPT FOR YOU.

Wu Xie: okay let’s think about this; for starters, I didn’t break into my own shop

Wang Meng: You would be in danger of doing some work in the process, that’s true.

Wang Pangzi: LOL

Wu Xie: ANYWAY let’s keep going. For example, Xiao Ge would only break in somewhere for a good reason. Xiao Ge, did you do this?

Zhang Qiling: No.

Wu Xie: okay who’s next

Wang Pangzi: YOU REALLY MISSED YOUR CALLING IN INTERROGATION TIANZHEN

REALLY PUT THE SCREWS TO HIM

IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE;)

Zhang Qiling: How can we be certain *you* didn’t do it?

Wang Meng: Admittedly that was my guess, too.

Wang Pangzi: WOW I SEE HOW IT IS

BLAME PANGZI AS USUAL

ANYWAY HOW DOES HUO DAOFU FIT INTO THIS

Wu Xie: Oh yeah him! Oops I got distracted

Wang Pangzi: UR ENTIRE HISTORY IN A NUTSHELL

Wu Xie: Ugh fuck off

Wang Meng what abt Huo Daofu??

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wu Xie: oh sorry xiaoge I didn’t realize you wouldn’t have spent much time around him last year

He and I go way back

Zhang Qiling: Way back where?

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: I CANNOT BELIEVE HE IS BUYING YOUR INNOCENT ACT

IF YOU EVER TURN TO EVIL WE ARE FUCKED

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO HUO DAOFU IS

YOU WERE EXTREMELY POLITE AND BORDERLINE FRIENDLY TOWARDS HIM

Zhang Qiling: I wanted him to feel welcome. I wanted to be sure he understands he has a place here. A specific place.

Wang Pangzi: FOR A SILENT GUY YOU ARE A MASTER AT SUBTLE POWER PLAYS IM ALL TINGLY

LMAO THE IDEA OF WU XIE LEAVING YOU FOR HUO DAOFU IS HILARIOUS AND ALSO NOPE

Zhang Qiling: Rationally, I understand that.

Main Chat

Wang Meng: Huo Daofu is coming for the weekend—didn’t Wu Xie tell you? Wu Xie asked me to check in a week ahead so we could start getting ready for his arrival

Wu Xie: oh yeah I did do that

Wang Meng: Fortunately I know you and so I already went ahead and took care of everything.

Re: the trip

He made a deal with Wu Xie’s doctor that he would do periodic checkups on him here at Wushanju

Bc Wu Xie hates being in the hospital

And frankly the hospital hates him too

Wang Pangzi: FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTEMPT LOL

I FORGOT HUO DAOFU WAS DOING THAT

A VERY CHIVALROUS GESTURE

WOULDNT YOU SAY

XIOAGE

Zhang Qiling: Is it safe for him to be here with a criminal loose on the premises?

Wu Xie: Right, back to the curtain! Let’s focus on the curtain, hmm?

Wang Pangzi: I AM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS WEEKEND.

ALSO WE CAN RULE OUT XIAO BAI FOR THE CURTAIN SHE JUST SENT A SELFIE FROM NORWAY COVERED IN GREEN SLIME WITH ZERO CONTEXT, UR PROTEGE INDEED

Wu Xie: okay but who else would do something so oddly charming yet illegal and—wait.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: hey, Glasses hasn’t been in touch lately right?

Li Cu: uh nope

Unless u count the outdated memes

Why, is money or Xie Yuchen missing

Or is this curtain related, I saw Wang Meng’s tweet

Wu Xie: haha no nothing to worry about really

(I mean maybe? but who knows)

Wang Meng is probably just getting a little paranoid in his old age

Li Cu: better than getting reckless and stupid as hell in ur old age

Wu Xie: …hey:(

Unknown Number: Li Cu, we discussed this.

Wu Xie: ????????

Li Cu: *sigh* fine, reckless and stupid as heck

Unknown Number: …close enough.

Wu Xie: EXCUSE who is that

Madame, Sir, Non-Binary Tree Spirit, etc—whomst the fuck

Are you

Li Cu is underage FYI

So Im staying on this chat

Li Cu: okay first of all, it’s not like that

Second of all I’m literally not underage I s2g

u threw the embarrassing surprise bday party, okay so u should remember

And C, that’s my counselor and I invited her. She wanted to meet u and I knew u wouldn’t agree to a visit so I added her to our chat

we have been discussing u

Wu Xie: Oh wow!!!!!!!

What a surprise:)

hi so nice to meet you:)

Main Chat:

Wu Xie: RED FUCKING ALERT

FUCK THE CURTAIN FUCK THE VISIT

IVE BEEN TRICKED INTO FAMILY THERAPY BY A SMUG TEENAGER WHO TEXTS UNKNOWN NUMBERS

Wang Meng: I assume that means something to someone here?

Not my problem? Good.

Wang Pangzi: AHAHAHA GOD I LOVE LI CU

HES LIKE ADORABLE KARMA FOR ALL THE SHIT YOUVE PUT ME THROUGH

IM RAISING HIS ALLOWANCE

Wu Xie: wait i give him an allowance

has he been collecting on two allowances??

Zhang Qiling: Three. I knew about both of yours.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: so uh may I ask your name?

Unknown Number: you can call me Ms. Lee.

Now, if you’re comfortable talking in this format, why don’t you tell me how things have been going?

Wu Xie: oh everything is normal and fine and safe as usual, why do you ask:)

Li Cu: I heard about ur necklace thing. nice of you to NOT mention it.

another dangerous adventure. again. prick.

Ur lucky your cool boyfriend cares about you so much or you’d have already died like ten years ago

Wu Xie: lol try twenty years ago

Li Cu: That isn’t funny.

Unknown Number: …What?

Wu Xie: shit ur right, okay that was a bit glib, my apologies.

…I use humor as a coping mechanism?

Unknown Number: and Li Cu, how do you feel about that?

Li Cu: he doesn’t even know what that phrase means

He doesn’t cope, like ever

In fact

It’s kind of why we met

Which is a funny story in retrospect tbh

Wu Xie: haha what are you talking about sweetie hahaha need I remind you of certain anecdotes that could idk send me to jail maybe lmao

Unknown Number: …You know, perhaps an in-person meeting might be more effective?

Wu Xie: haha such a nice idea but why

Main Chat

Wu Xie: If I go to jail, I’ll have to create alliances for protection, right, that’s how it works on tv

Who do we know who spends time in jail

Other than Hei Yangjing, he’s only ever there for like 12 hours and i suspect he just gets himself arrested bc he enjoys the breaking out process

Also how’s the curtain case coming along

Zhang Qiling: Has someone threatened you?

Wu Xie: well not yet but soon I’m sure

Wang Pangzi: WHERE WAS THIS PARANOIA WHEN WE GOT TAKEN TO THE TEA HOUSE HUH

Snake Eyes Minus Your Fucking Therapist Chat

Li Cu: okay how tf did u pull off spy and undercover shit

u are sus as hell

Wu Xie: damn son is it pick on Wu Xie night

I missed the flyers or I would’ve invited my uncles

Also re: the curtain it’s been mostly solved

Li Cu: I’m not your son, idiot.

Wu Xie: …oh. Sorry, sorry, you’re right, bad choice of words, haha

Forget i said anything

Delete this chat even

Li Cu: shit I meant

Legally, biologically, I meant—

shit

…I turn into an asshole as a coping mechanism?

Wu Xie: oh that’s all okay! I have to go do something else now let me know if you need anything okay kid thanks!

Li Cu: goddamn it calm down who’s the kid here

lemme organize my thoughts so I can articulate my emotions fuckin healthily or w/e

Ugh maybe for like one afternoon we could go to Ms. Lee together? She knows how to word stuff

Wu Xie: uh…okay.

Li Cu: Anyway you don’t need to worry abt jail

As if you would survive prison for one day you’d piss off half the place in like an hour or less

I gave Ms. Lee the heavily edited version of the desert highway to hell roadtrip and i discussed it more in terms of like “nightmarish but still wouldn’t take any of it back”

Well maybe the sand

that shit was everywhere

Wu Xie: oh kiddo. It’s fine, really…You don’t have to explain yourself to me.

Li Cu: no, no it’s just

I do technically have a dad

who is an asshole. Being a son doesn’t really mean shit to me bc it sucked.

So you need to stop backing down just cuz ur guilty abt stuff. I’m really really glad ur not my dad in a good way. Do u get what I mean there

Where’s the mafia widower I followed into hell, huh

Wu Xie: Ur a good kid, despite my influence. I’m really glad you have someone to talk to after everything I…after everything. Wow this talking through feelings thing is kind of weird but nice ur right

Jfc no wonder it took me and xiaoge so long to—you know what, we won’t get into that

Li Cu: ew tmi

Also re: this week’s recent necklace fuckery

I moved my stuff here, I live here now

So you can’t die anymore

Or else…Idk I don’t have a threat planned

anyways abt the curtain

Wu Xie: oh my god, kid…kid you have no idea

I am in tears.

Li Cu: see this is why I can’t be nice to you I can sense the hallmark channel from here

Ugh don’t be sad in ur room that’s dumb

Go hug Pangzi or something

Maybe delete this chat

Or the curtain thing

Focus on the curtain thing

Just stfu and go away

Wu Xie: <3 screenshotting this <3

Li Cu: I take back everything I said. This is why Xiao Ge sleeps on the roof. I hope the ghosts of the Wangs put up that curtain to strangle you somehow. Go die in a stupid way, it’ll suit you.

Wu Xie: lol don’t worry I’m not gonna embarrass you with it or anything

Main Chat

Wu Xie: omg guys look how cute my kid is *sending screenshot*

Wang Pangzi: I MEAN

HE IS WISHING YOU DEATH

BUT SURE

CUTE I GUESS

Wu Xie: no but read the whole thing:):):)

Zhang Qiling: It is indeed very hard to remain angry with you. And you are welcome to join me on the roof.

Wang Pangzi: UH NOPE

NOT WHENI HAD TO BLEACH THE COUNTER IN THE KITCHEN

DONT TRAUMATIZE THE EARLY BIRDS THEYRE ALREADY FREAKED OUT BY U YA HOODIE CRYPTID

Wu Xie: ok true but babe ur like a sexy cryptid

Wang Meng: so, are we just accepting that there is a glittery curtain of unknown origin, and Huo Daofu is going to have to see it while he’s waiting for you at Wushanju bc you’re going to family therapy?

Wu Xie: right

Wang Pangzi: SHOULDA TAKEN EARLY RETIREMENT HUH

Wang Meng: I’m going to go dust something.

Unnamed Chat:

Unknown number: so the curtain…

Unknown number 2: yep, not my best work but I kinda panicked last minute u know

Unknown number: what is in the water at Wushanju that makes everyone dumb and attractive

Unknown number 2: relax they’ll figure it out

[shirophantomvox]

Powdered Perfume

This was a head canon post but turned into a short story. Yes, this is an angst story, and I did this because I wanted to do something different for a chance. I’m sorry about the grammar issue! I hate online classes because I feel like I have lost so many abilities that I don’t know if I’ll ever relearn them again, but enjoy! FYI the bold and italicized words represent a flashback or thought.

EDIT: I fixed the grammar on this one! My goodness! Participating in Online school has really ruined me, lol.

One day, Hisoka passed a candle shop in Yorknew next to an arena. The shop was very vibrant; its pastel colors glistened underneath the natural sunlight and that itself is what attracted him. Hisoka isn’t much of a candle man but the aroma itself just catches his nostril every time. The bell on the door rang ever so lightly, alerting the manager to come and greet every customer that entered. It was oddly silent, so silent that you could hear a pin drop. The sound of Hisoka’s heel is the only thing that could be heard and even so it was pleasant to the ear.

“Hello! Welcome to Dreaming Sensations where you find a solution to your insomnia. Do you need any help?” The manager’s smile was bright and wide.

“No, thank you. I’m just looking around,” he said, slightly throwing up his hand and smiling. The store was tiny and contained many scents that seemed to blend in well with each other. At the front of the store, there stood a wooden cabinet with the season’s candles and body cream. Someone beautifully decorated rose petals along the ride of the cabinet while someone taped perfectly the yellow LED lights on the outline of the square.

Just as they parted ways, Hisoka stopped in his tracks, wiped-eyed, and sniffed in the air like a curious puppy. He looked to his right, then to his left, and what he smelt nearly caused him to drop to his knees. For the first time in a while, he felt like weeping. The scent that filled the air overwhelmed him, as it gave him some sort of familiar feeling. A sudden feeling of warmth, care, and disappointment felt its imaginary arms being wrapped around his torso.

The smell was coming from the north side of the store and at this point; he walked as if he was being controlled by the scent. His way of walking, his wide-eyed gaze, and his being in utter shock were so obvious that the scent had its finger under his chin, pulling him closer.

“What’s this smell? It reminds me of a time…” Hisoka wasn’t one to ponder upon useless thoughts or actions. He is going to solve this mystery, even if it made him burst into tears. Hisoka isn’t afraid to bawl in front of anyone because if they stepped out of line, he would deal with them immediately, although the thought of a man considered being weak for crying is utterly ridiculous. They kept the perfume and essential oils at the front of the store, as these items were often stolen. Someone neatly placed these small glass bottles in their cubbies in glass against the wall. The pink spotlights made these oils look so godly that they will convince anyone to spend unnecessary money on them.

“Orange, Strawberry, Rose, ah!”

There it was.

The scent that attracted him.

“Powdered Perfume,” he read out loud. “Powdered Perfume….that smell.”

The manager noticed him ogling the essential oil and perfume and to her, it seemed like he was interested in buying quite a few. She walked over once again, stood next to him, and folded her arms. She pinpointed instantly that he was eyeballing the Powdered Perfume.

“Powdered Perfume, huh? That’s a good one! Its aroma nearly fills the room for over 24 hours. I know it's $50 but trust me, it’s worth it. This will last for at least 2 months.”

Hisoka did not answer her but glanced instead. A somber smile appeared on his face as he parted his lips to hum. What was it about this scent that made him so content? So relaxed and unbothered?

“Do you like the smell,” she asked again, trying to engage in conversation.

“It’s magnificent,” he said, sniffling a little.

“Well, I’ll leave you to browse some more. I’m Janice. I’ll be at the counter should you have any questions.”

They placed a white polished wooden bench just in front of the perfume section, with a humidifier in the same area. The store placed it there so customers could test out certain oils to get an understanding of how they’d smell and for how long. To his luck, the Powered Perfume came as an essential oil and a bottle of perfume. Next to the perfume section were small rooms heavily guarded with security cameras. Customers can take the spare humidifiers into the rooms to test the oils and their aromas. He used his steady hand to grab the essential oil bottle titled “Powdered Perfume” and the actual perfume bottle and entered room 1.

He placed the humidifier on the south side of the room and he sat diagonally from it. The reclining chair has an option that allows a customer to enable vibration and massage one’s head while they enjoyed the smell. The store created these “Spa Rooms” for those who are stressed out, anxious, or upset about anything that may trouble them and this pampering is what he needed. He kicked his long legs up on a black cushion and pressed the green button on the remote.

His eyelids gently rested upon his upper cheek, his face laid flat, and his breathing was slow and steady. His crossed legs contained extra warmth that triggered a chemical in his brain to fall asleep. The smell carelessly spread out of the humidifier and into the air, and within seconds, the room smelt wonderful. This “Powdered Perfume” felt like a million kisses were being pressed against Hisoka’s skin. These “kisses” didn't feel intimate or caused any sort of arousal to concur, but felt endearing, almost… maternal.

The humidifier had been releasing oil at 50% and the room had been full of Powdered Perfume for at least 20 minutes. On the outside, Hisoka appeared to be at rest, but his mind was running wild. The vivid memories and images that played in his mind paralyzed his body. Several of these memories involved him, as a child, his sister, and his mother. They were a small, manageable family that had problems like everyone else, but just the image of his mother caused him to be in this state. His father would come and go so naturally both children grew attached to their mother. She worked at the local receiving hospital as a nurse in several birthing rooms. She earned a decent salary and spoiled her children rotten to where she often regretted doing so. Life seemed to go well for the little family until the Death Angel passed over their home and was flowing awfully hard one night. Mrs. Morrow had to work midnights for a couple of months. She dreaded this because traveling at night was dangerous for anyone but was worse for women. Leaving her young children at home by themselves always stressed her out, but she had faith that Hisoka could manage the home if he needed to. She’d routinely kiss her children on the forehead while they slept before she left for the night. This was a “promise” she made to ensure she returned safely. She couldn’t imagine a life where her children were abandoned more than they already were.

She always traveled by freeway to get there quickly so she could have time to snag a breakfast sandwich and coffee. Driving on the freshly paved freeway was always relaxing but sometimes a devilish spirit overshadows one’s body and can cause them to reign terror upon anyone in their grasp. Road Rage had been frequent within the last 2 months. The newly elected mayor upset people and lashed out at random people because their candidate didn’t win. Hisoka’s mother was involved in a road rage incident. Two buff men tailgated her and knowing the type of person she is, she fought back. A 50s styled Ford Pickup Truck in Cherry Red had was covered in what looked like dried blood but could easily be mistaken for dried paint. They were also angry because she was following the speed limit when all they had to do was switch lanes if they wanted to break the law. These men damaged her bumper and nearly ran her off the road, but she could dodge, causing their truck to hit the concrete barrier.

As she approached the hospital’s parking lot, Mrs. Morrow grabbed her heavy backpack, her extra pair of pants, and purse. A sudden gut feeling told her to run to safety, but that single-second delay of a message sent from her brain to her legs led to her demise. The “O’Connor Brothers”, a nickname by the authorities, shot Mrs. Morrow 3 times, stroking her back and hitting a major artery in her right leg. She hit the ground flat; the way she fell signaled to anyone that she had no chance of living.

Hisoka and his sister awoke the next morning to their father in their bedrooms reading a newspaper. They immediately jumped out of their beds like broken springs and stood before their father. The magazine covered his face, but his hands were shaking. It rattled, nearly about to be ripped to shreds. His knuckles darkened as he clung to the newspaper harder. Both children knew that their father only showed his pathetic face when something horrible had happened. Just as he was about to reveal the terrifying news, Hisoka’s sister asked him where her mother was. She usually was home by now and would be up making breakfast for them. Neither of them smelt eggs, muffins, or sausage. Only the smell of the humidifier in her room that omitted that familiar scent “Powdered Perfume”.

A tear rolled down Hisoka’s face, still unable to move. Suddenly, multiple memories of his mother filled his racing mind to overlap the painful memory that seemed to repeat.

When he scraped his knee, she was there to tend to his bruises.

When his sister faced bullying for the first time, she was there to embrace her warmly and tightly.

Hisoka faced bullying because of his freckles, it's something he’s learned to deal with but it often tore him down on the inside. For a while during and after high school, he’d apply a nude shade of foundation over his skin to hide them. His mother was furious once she found out why she could never find the foundation, but she was more furious when she found out why he was using it. She reassured him many times to embrace who he was, to embrace the freckles that were placed upon his face. She’d kiss and slightly pinch both his cheeks to get him to smile and it worked every time! Both parents provide a sense of comfort and protection, but there was something different about a mother’s love that made him want to continue pushing in life.

Hisoka and his sister would bring their mother breakfast in bed, as she would be too tired to make it for herself. They’d often jump into her large fluffy bed, throw the blanket over their bodies, and would cuddle with her while she ate her toast and bacon. Almost on queue, Hisoka dove his little freckled nose onto his mother’s right arm. The sweet smell of what smelt like scented powder filled his nostrils.

He was so drawn to the smell of this perfume because it reminded him of his mother, the one that was taken from him at such a young age that only certain memories of her remain hanging by a thread. Even at 24 years old, the memories of his mother were fading away. But one thing is for sure. If he wanted to remember them all, he had to buy many essential oils and perfume bottles of the powdered perfume.

One last memory resurfaced of him and Mrs. Morrow talking 2 hours before the road rage incident. Hisoka practically begged her to stay home... but she refused.

“Don’t you like your cool TV?”

“Yeah… but…”

“Well, if you want more, I have to work. Don’t worry, I’ll be back in the morning, honey.”

“Are you sure? You were very late last week.”

“I know… that’s because I had to cover for someone else, but I don’t expect to tonight. Now, rest your little eyes and dream big!”

“Ok. I love you, mommy.”

“I love you too, sweetheart. I’ll see you soon.”

She never returned that morning.

An alarm blared waking Hisoka from his nightmare, signaling that his desired time was up. He wiped both of his eyes clear of any tears, blew his nose, and proceeded with the essential oil in his left hand and the perfume in his right. The manager, Janice, met him at the threshold, eager to hear about his experience.

“Well…,” she asked, tilting her head to the right.

“I’m going to buy it. I would like both essential oil and perfume.”

“I assume you loved the Powdered Perfume collection. You have great taste! Is it for a special someone?”

Special Someone?

“Huh,” he asked, still dazed by his thoughts. “Apologies; It’s for me.”

“That’s great! If you like this, next week the creator of this fabulous line will be in for a Q and A panel! Stop by and enjoy finger foods! Your total is $101.23.”

“Why would I pay over $100 for oil? Well, It’s for my mother. If this will keep my memories of her alive, I shall do it.”

“I have sent the receipt to your email, and here is your card. I am thrilled that you stopped by! I’m afraid I haven’t seen you before. What’s your name, again? I’d love to know where you shop for clothes!”

Hisoka glanced at his outfit and realized that he was wearing his usual shirt and pants, but replaced his shoes with boots instead.

“I’m Hisoka. I appreciate your excellent customer service. My mother will be happy with her gifts.”

The ride home was silent; so silently that all he could do was talk to his mother about his gifts. He felt her warm, powerful presence, as if she was actually sitting in the passenger's side of the car. As ruthless as he may seem Hisoka believes that humans have a soul and once they die, their souls, in fact, do either end up in a fiery pit or in a luxurious home.

He placed the perfume bottle in the middle of his dresser and placed the essential oil on his bedside table. Taking his brand new humidifier out of the box, he sat it next to the headboard. It required a little less than a teaspoon of the scented essential oil in the humidifier and turned on. Again, he gently closed his eyes, relaxed all of his muscles, and cleared his mind. The scented powdery smell filled his nostrils and only 10 minutes into his slumber, the memories of his mother returned. He shed many tears of both anger and sadness. He blamed himself for not “putting his foot down” enough on that fateful night.

“Stop worrying, Hisoka….” Her voice echoed like a ghost in a dark endless void.

Tears dropped quicker down to his cheekbone and dripped to his pillow.

“Stop worrying, my child. I am safe.”

“You’re not! You should be here with me,” he angrily murmured.

“We will reunite again…”

[thebibliosphere]

The problem with Amazon and Indie Publishing.

Hey fam, this is just a heads up from myself and all the others involved with the Weird and Wonderful Holiday Romance anthology regarding the paperback edition.

It’s been brought to our attention that some serious nonsense is happening regarding Amazon and Amazon-owned distributors (looking at you Book Depository) stating falsely that our books are either out of stock (false) going to take two months to ship to you (FALSE) or allowing scalpers to set the price at ridiculous amounts such as these, instead of our actual price:

ID: An image showing the cost of our paperback anthology costing $45.25 instead of our set price of $17.99.

PLEASE DO NOT BUY FROM THIS SELLER.

The marketplace has been hijacked by a scalper who does not represent us or any of our distributors. The anthology should never cost more than $17.99 (+tax/shipping), and it should NOT take two to three months to get to you. It is in stock and ready to be shipped from our printer, Ingram Sparks, today.

As is evident from our Barnes and Noble link:

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/weird-wonderful-holiday-romance-anthology-caitlyn-lynch/1133948930?ean=9780998168425

ID: An image showing the cost of our paperback anthology being sold through Barnes & Noble for $17.99, fully in stock and ready to ship and also available for delivery Friday 8th of November with Expedited Shipping, something they would not be able to do if the book was out of stock.

And also here from Ingram Spark themselves:

Sorry for the Potato Quality of this one, but if you click it you will see it is fully ready to ship/download without delay.

So what the heck is going on with Amazon then? Well, as I’m sure you’ll all be shocked to learn: Amazon is a complete bag of dicks and are actively throttling our sales because we chose not to use their printing service. Yep, I’ll say that again: Amazon actively throttles the sales of Indie Authors who choose not to use Kindle Direct to Print as their main printer and distributor and then tries to get you to buy the Kindle Version so THEY can get the sale:

ID: An image showing Amazon giving false information stating the paperback of the anthology “usually ships within 1-2 months. Why wait? Try the Kindle Edition instead and start reading now!”

And if you think that sounds like playing a game of Monoply with your hands tied behind your back, you’d be right!

So what’s the big deal, Joy? Why not just bite the bullet and print things through the KDP store? Well person who was no doubt going to ask this in the comments, I’m glad you asked. Here are multiple reasons:

Number one: Kindle Direct pays less in royalties than other more reputable printers. The difference is about a dollar and change less, but when you factor in the cost of production and how little the indie author actually makes in take home sales, that dollar matters.

Number two: Kindle Direct quality control is an absolute shit-show, and it’s not unheard of for books to be sent out either missing pages, printed upside down, with pages cut in half, or just plain blank! For an example, please check out this post from Nicole Autumns’s twitter dated Nov 4th 2019 to see what we’re dealing with, and also understand why many Indie Authors are starting to drop KDP like the rotten hot potato it is.

Number three: here’s a funny thing, there’s no reason for the KDP quality be be Like That, because with the exception of Australia, KDP’s main printer is (drumroll please!) Ingram Sparks! Yes, that’s right! OUR PRINTER. The one they are saying is out of stock. Now isn’t that interesting. (NB: The article is wrong about earning more through KDP and does not reflect the experiences of our authors or the publisher.)

Number four: we actually did submit for KDP after we realized they were going to throttle our sales, meaning we now go to print at a loss, and also risk shoddy quality control and

Number five: We Shouldn’t Have To! That’s it, that’s the tea. We shouldn’t have to use KDP for them to represent us honestly and act fairly as a distributor, but unfortunately for you me and everyone else who isn’t Jeff F*#!%$NG Bezos, Amazon has no such qualms about things like honesty, fairness or transparency. 

So, why sell with Amazon at all? To put it simply: Because we have to.

Amazon is the #1 retail seller for books, and for a lot of us it’s the only chance we’ll get at gaining any real income from our work. Not everyone has the luxury of a book deal from a Big Publishing house that pays to keep the lights on. And even those are few and far between, and often not as much money as you think they are.

And in case you weren’t boiling mad already? Want to know what else Amazon throttles? Reviews! So if you’ve read our work and enjoyed it? PLEASE leave a review, either on the amazon page out of spite, Good Reads (also owned by Amazon, fyi) or wherever you got your copies of the books from.

Reviews matter so much to authors, they’re not just a nice way of letting people know you liked something, they also keep us relevant to the algorithms and not shunted to the side in favor of people who pay for their reviews, which yes is a thing, and maybe we’ll go into that another time.

So to bring this long ass and extremely worn out post to a close: if you were one of the people who contacted us about this, thank you.

If you were one of the people who expressed interest in the anthology but were put off by Amazon’s bullshit: please take a look at our other paperback distributors.

If you read our anthology: please consider leaving a review! We’re fighting an uphill battle against an unethical multibillion dollar conglomerate that’s got a stranglehold on the industry and we’re all very small and very tired, and speaking for myself, very queer and disabled, so you can imagine the kind of stress we’re under right now.

I dunno how to end this. Support your local author. Eat the rich.

Be excellent to each other.

[daughterofluthien]

“decisions were respected” Sorry but didn’t Scott violently throw Isaac against a wall more than once just because Isaac liked his ex girlfriend in canon? That’s the literal opposite of healthy...

Hey, anon!

This is in reference to this post about Scallison for the shipping meme, where I said that one of my favorite things about Scallison is that the show lets them have a healthy breakup, and even date other people while still remaining friends. The scenes you are referring to are a pair of scenes in 3x13 Anchors.

So lets’s take a look.

(under a cut bc it turns out that when you try to be comprehensive, things get v long v quickly 😅)

The Scenes

I’m actually gonna copy/paste the dialogue of both scenes (along with minimal action/inflection notation for context) so that we can really make sure we know what we’re talking about here, so bear with me:

The first of these scenes occurs as Scott and Isaac are getting ready to head to school in the morning. After some initial ‘hey, what’re you doing, are you heading to school’ dialogue—during which both boys seem a bit awkward—we get the following:

ISAAC: [anxiously] Can I ask you a question? SCOTT: Okay... ISAAC: Are you angry with me? SCOTT: No! ISAAC: Are you sure? SCOTT: ...No. ISAAC: [awkwardly] What's that mean? SCOTT: I guess I'm not really sure how I'm feeling... ISAAC: [nodding] Okay. ...Do you hate me? SCOTT: [sighing] No, of course not. ISAAC: Do you want to hit me? SCOTT: [taken aback] No. ISAAC: I think you should hit me. SCOTT: I don't want to hit you. ISAAC: Are you sure? SCOTT: Why would I want to hit you? You didn't do anything, did you? ISAAC: [stammering] No. I mean, um... What do you mean? SCOTT: I mean, like, you didn't kiss her or anything, right? ISAAC: No! Absolutely not. No. SCOTT: ...Did you want to? ISAAC: Oh, yeah. Totally. [scene cuts to hallway outside the room. Isaac flies through the doorway and hits the wall] MELISSA: Hey! You two teenage boys? Don't test my entirely un-supernatural level of patience! ISAAC: ...Feel better?

The scene then ends, and we cut to subsequent scenes of Stiles and then Allison also getting ready for school.

The second scene is much shorter and happens later in the episode, after Isaac saves Lydia from an arrow that Allison fired while hallucinating. He and Scott are in Scott’s room again, and he’s telling him about the incident:

SCOTT: Right at her head? ISAAC: Almost right through it. And she keeps saying the same thing-- that she keeps seeing her aunt. Whatever's happening to you guys is getting worse. If I hadn't been there, then Lydia would be dead. SCOTT: ...What were you doing there? ISAAC: Uh... [scene cuts to hallway outside the room. Isaac flies through the doorway and hits the wall] MELISSA: [groaning] Oh, you guys, come on! This house does not have a supernatural ability to heal! So, stop it!

But of course just the text of the scene isn’t enough to accurately convey everything in even a tiny portion of a larger narrative, because nothing happens in a vacuum. With that in mind, let’s look at...

The Context 

The first of these scenes occurs immediately after the opening credits, and is the first time we see either Scott or Isaac this season. (Assuming you consider 3B a separate season, of course, which is a whole ‘nother can of worms. This tv show we all choose to enjoy sure is Something.)

Often, the opening of a season is used to reintroduce the audience to the main characters—letting us know where their characters arcs are starting, and what they’ll be struggling with this season. Teen Wolf did this previously (and did it well, imo) in 3x01 Tattoo. Act 2 of that episode begins with a series of four scenes showing our main characters getting ready for school in the morning, highlighting where everyone currently is, and setting up where their arcs are going to go.

Scene order taken by itself would seem to indicate that they were trying to do something similar in this episode. It starts off with the hook of Stiles’ extended nightmare sequence. He can’t tell dreams apart from reality anymore, and wakes up screaming. Cut to black, cue opening credit sequence.

Immediately after the first ad break, we get a sequence of three scenes. The first is the longer of the two Scott and Isaac scenes (which, as previously mentioned, occurs as they’re getting ready to head out to school). The second is of Stiles. He’s packing for school, and the audience learns that he’s been struggling to read when he’s awake as well. Finally, we see Allison leaving her and her dad’s apartment. She seems like she’s doing fine, if a little over-focused. But then she gets into the elevator, and has an extended hallucination/flashback of Kate.

We learn soon after this that all three of them (Scott, Stiles, and Allison) are suffering from the aftereffects of their sacrifice in the previous season. According to the explanations we get both from Kira and, later, from Deaton, they’re slipping into bardo, or the space between life and death, and there’s a door open in their minds. 

Okay, problem established.

It stands to reason, then, that all three of those opening scenes are supposed to serve to set up this problem. We’re shown, in three successive scenes, that all three of our sacrificees are, as the kids say, Not Doing So Hot.

(yes I know the kids don’t say that, let me be an increasingly out-of-touch millennial in peace)

This is all well and good, and honestly makes sense! Under this paradigm, the Scott and Isaac scene should be highlighting that Scott is Losing Control. Bardo is affecting him, and it’s causing him to be more aggressive. Giving in to violence in a way that he generally holds himself back from. Heck, the scene even starts with Scott flexing his fingers, and we (and Scott) see the shadow of a clawed hand against the door.

In the context of the narrative, it makes sense.

Except.

eXCEPT—

The Framing

The thing about the medium of television is that, when we’re talking about a scene, we can’t just look at the narrative structure. We also have to look at the scene itself: how it’s shot and directed, how it’s edited, even what music is paired with the scenes.

In the Stiles and Allison sequences, the scenes are very clearly shot for tension and horror. Long lingering shots on the things that Just Aren’t Right. Music that heightens the tension. Stiles gets some nice lil scare chords over the shot of the book that he can’t read, and there’s a very quiet droning in the background of the Allison nightmare sequence that slowly grows into some classic horror soundtrack music.

Okay. So far that tracks with the narrative thesis.

Now let’s take look at the Scott and Isaac scene.

We start out with some of those lingering shots I was talking about, as Scott is halted in his tracks when he notices the shadow of the clawed hand. We see his own hand is human and unshifted. There’s quiet, percussion heavy music over this portion of the scene that increases in tension at this point. Shaken, Scott closes his hand into a fist, and when he opens it, both the shadow and his own hand are smooth and human. The tense music fades out to silence, and he breathes a sigh of relief.

Scott opens the door to reveal Isaac, which startles him. There’s a short musical sting to underline this moment, and then the background music cuts out completely, leaving us (and them) in the awkwardness of this moment. 

And OH BOY. IS IT AWKWARD. 😬

You can kinda see the Awkwardness Inherent in the System in the dialogue that I pasted up at the top—it’s a lot of back-and-forth, short statements, trailing off... And both Posey and Sharman are playing up the awkwardness as well. Neither boy looks like they really want to be there, and that includes Isaac, who initiated this entire conversation.

But here’s the thing.

The thing that really frustrates me about this scene.

It’s not the sort of awkwardness that exists to increase the tension. The sort that builds and builds until it reaches a fever pitch and you know something just has to give. You know, the sort of tension that you would want to build if you were showing how the protagonist of your show is no longer fully in control, and is on a knife’s edge of lashing out at his friend and beta.

Instead, it’s played for comedy.

And once again, a lot of this is down to the music.

Before the dialogue that I quoted at the top even begins, the music starts back up, and this time the tense percussion has been replaced by light, pizzicato strings. (That may not be the exact right term, fyi, I only really know enough about music theory to be dangerous.) But you know, the playful, plucked strings that often accompanies comedic or otherwise not-serious scenes.

Background music tells the viewer how they’re supposed to feel about the events in a particular scene, and the music here is saying that we’re not supposed to find this whole confrontation that dramatic. In fact, we’re supposed to find it funny.

But it’s not just the music that that frames this scene as comedic. It’s also the fact that we don’t actually see Scott shoving Isaac. Instead, the scene cuts to the hallway, and all we see is Isaac flying through the doorway.

Now, obviously I don’t have a direct line to the director and editors’ minds here. But I would bet money that those particular shots were chosen 1). because it’s so much easier to do a wire pull stunt when you don’t have to show what it’s in reaction to, and 2). because it’s kinda difficult to show your main character directly doing a violence and make it funny.

But show someone yeeted into frame, and that’s funny. Right?

(Spoiler alert: not in this context, it isn’t)

Now, I know I’ve been focusing on the first scene a lot—partially because it’s longer and partially because it’s really the only reason that the second scene exists—but I do want to take a look at the second scene really quickly as well. It’s much shorter and generally adopts a more serious tone than the first one, mostly due to fact that we’re smack dab in the middle of the action at this point. The weird visions that the sacrificees have been having all episode have started endangering lives, and they can’t just wait for it to resolve on its own.

But then the focused, intent exposition is broken by Scott’s question of “why were you there.” Then smash cut to a near identical shot of the hallway,and Isaac yeeting into frame.

The thing is, this scene is entirely dependent on the previous one. It only “works”—and I use this term loosely—as a call back to the scene at the beginning of the ep. Heck, both even have the stinger of a frustrated Melissa at the end of both scenes, frustrated at all the boys-will-be-boys roughhousing going on in her house.

Much like the first scene, this one is also set up and framed for Comedy.

Which is um. A Choice. 

But What Does It All Mean

What frustrates me about these scenes, at the end of the day, is that the narrative intention and the directing/editing seem to be fundamentally at odds.

On the one hand, it makes narrative sense to say that the purpose of the scenes is to show that Scott is losing control. That he’s being affected by bardo and the open door in his mind, and it’s putting the people close to him in danger. But then on the other, the way the scenes are actually used are as comic relief. As a way to release tension between very tense, dramatic scenes. 

I don’t think it works, as I don’t personally find it funny at all. But that really does seem to be the intention.

Once again, absolutely wILD choices were made on the part of tptb, and I really wish anyone had thought for two seconds about the implications of all of this, but nO

Ahem.

So now (literally 2K words later I’m so sorry 😅) what does this tell us about the characters? Certainly no one here is arguing that shoving someone is a good or defensible choice, whether it’s due to forces outside the character’s control or not. But even taking the influence of bardo in mind, is it even in character for Scott in the first place?

Because canon can also be written inconsistently/out of character, especially when we’re talking about a long-running show like tw.

One’s an Incident, Two is Coincidence...

Well, we all know the end of that saying.

So let’s end by looking at a few patterns.

As I mentioned at the beginning of this, once again, eXCEEDINGLY long post, this is reference to a post I made about scallison. I said the following in that post:

And I also really like that they [Scott and Allison] didn’t get back together. That they were allowed to be friends. That even though sometimes it hurt to watch someone you love loved love become romantically close to another person, decisions were respected, and no friendships were broken over it.

The first pattern we need to look at, then, is this:

What’s Scott’s pattern of behavior toward Allison and Isaac’s relationship?

And does Scott’s behavior toward Isaac in these two scenes match the pattern, or is it an outlier?

3x11 Alpha Pact: Sacrifice Prep The revelation that Allison and Isaac have grown close enough for him to act as emotional tether for her is very visibly a blow to Scott. He looks like the rug has been pulled out from under him, but he doesn’t look angry or upset, just.... sad. In fact, it looks like he’s swallowing back tears. But he nods towards the two of them and just says, “It’s okay.”

3x12 Lunar Ellipse: “I look for my friends” This is the epilogue of the season. Scott walks into the hallway at all of his friends in turn. Satisfied. Happy. First at Lydia and Aiden, then at Danny and Ethan. Then he turns and watches as Isaac and Allison walk down the stairs, and they’re laughing, and so obviously happy, and Scott’s small smile grows. He isn’t jealous here—he’s happy for them. 

3x14 Illuminated: Mutual Recognition Scott and Allison are both at Danny’s halloween party, but they’re not here together. He sees her from across a crowded room, just like he did at the winter formal, so many months ago. But so much has happened, and they’re different people now. Allison’s with Isaac, and he’s starting to having feelings for Kira, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt, and that he doesn’t miss the relationship he and Allison had. For a moment, his fingers slip away from Kira’s, and he and Allison share a sad smile. 

Believe it or not, these are actually the only other examples I could find of Scott reacting to Isaac and Allison’s relationship. And uniformly across them, he’s sad, yes—after all, he loved her, and that relationship is very definitively over now. But he never seems jealous, and he isn’t angry.

So, if the Scott and Isaac scenes in Anchors don’t fit the pattern of Scott’s behavior towards the new couple, what pattern do they fit?

“Hit me.”

The teen wolf writers have a... really upsetting habit, honestly, of “resolving” interpersonal conflict between two characters by having the “wronged” party hit the other. Afterwards, the tension is almost completely broken between them, as if letting the person act aggressively in a way consensual to both parties has somehow solved the problem.

2x11 Battlefield: Derek and Peter After Peter comes back from the dead, he confronts the now pack-less Derek and offers to help him. Derek, likely remembering that Peter killed Laura and was responsible for most of the events of S1, attacks him instead. After taking a beating, Peter says the following:

PETER: Okay, go ahead! Come on, do it! Hit me. Hit me. I can see that it's cathartic for you! You're letting go of all the anger, self-loathing, and hatred that comes with total and complete failure. I may be the one taking the beating, Derek, but you've already been beaten. So, go ahead. Hit me if that will make you feel better. After all, I did say that I wanted to help.

3x13 Anchors: Scott and Isaac We’ve already discussed this scene in uh. Detail. So I don’t think we need to go into the specifics again. But just a reminder that this dialogue exists:

ISAAC: Do you want to hit me? SCOTT: No. ISAAC: I think you should hit me.

5x15 Amplification: Scott and Liam During the previous supermoon, Liam—swayed by grief, the full moon, and Theo’s manipulations—tried to kill Scott and take his power. They’ve since rediscovered an equilibrium in their relationship, and Liam’s back in Scott’s pack, but they’re both still dealing with the implications of that event. In this episode, they’re attempting to break Lydia out of Eichen, but they’re not as strong as they should be, due to the mountain ash laced through the building, and are having difficulty breaking down a door. Then, the following exchange occurs:

LIAM: Hit me. SCOTT: What? LIAM: Hit me! I'll get angry, then I'll get stronger. STILES: Hit him. Hit him! LIAM: I tried to take your powers. I tried to kill you. Hit me! STILES: He also left you for dead. LIAM: I wanted you dead!

6x16 Triggers: Liam and Theo No one actually directly says “hit me” in  this one, due to the circumstances, but the sentiment’s there. In this sequence, Liam and Theo are trying to convince Gerard and the hunters that the whole pack is hiding out in the zoo, so Theo goads Liam into hitting him, in order to stage a very audible fight.

THEO: Okay... Then they have to believe us.[shouts] Isn't that right? LIAM: [whispers] Why are you yelling? THEO: [shouts] You got a problem? Oh, that's right, you always have a problem! LIAM: [whispers] What the hell are you doing? THEO: [shouts] Shut up! [punches Liam] Yeah, you see that, Scott? Your little Beta can't even take a punch. And what do you think, Malia?

While there’s a variety of primary textual reasons here, all of them deal with personal issues between the pair, and all of them involve some level of catharsis for the person doing the punching. Taken all together, it’s honestly a pretty troubling pattern, especially given the inclusion of an actual canonical abuse victim initiating and receiving the violence.

TL;DR

This is a writer issue, not a character issue. The serious narrative context conflicts with the comedic framing in a way that is honestly baffling to me, and it doesn’t fit the established pattern of Scott’s character and actions. Moreover, it’s an example of the writers’ apparent belief that interpersonal conflict can and should be solved through consensual violence.

The pattern we do see, is that the Scott is saddened by the knowledge that Allison has moved on, but he’s glad that she and Isaac are happy. Similarly, Allison is saddened that Scott is moving on as well, because she does still care for him deeply. Despite their conflicted feelings, neither tries to disrupt the other’s new relationship.

On other shows, that would be a season-long, drama-filled plotline. Here, nothing.

And I legitimately love that so much.

[tmandpm]

It’s been hard, but I finally got it up.

[katnissmellarkkk]

Okay, onto my liveblog for chapter two of The Hunger Games :

Katniss’ flashback to falling out of a tree and being unable to breathe is such a good analogy, I steal it all the time in my own fics.

I wish the boy who held her up so she didn’t fall was given a name? Katniss just can’t provide names very easily, can she? 😅

“The odds had been entirely in her favor. But it hadn’t mattered” is actually an amazing quotable moment, someone make an edit pronto 👏

No one’s happy when a twelve year old is chosen but ya know. As soon as that kid turns thirteen, off with them! Fair game! 😭😂😅🙃

Hmmm how many of these kids knew immediately Katniss would volunteer for her sister? The way there was a boy ready to catch her before she fell and the way they all just cleared a path for her...

Katniss’ love for Prim had to be prominent because the other kids all seemed to be aware she would volunteer and Katniss claims this is a completely radical, unheard of thing to do. Sooo yeah. Her school peers probably noticed her a lot more than she realized.

Ooo. I just noticed the word choice in “district twelve hasn’t had a volunteer in decades”

Was there a point in time when Twelve had volunteers?

Awww the mayor being sad that Katniss is probably gonna die because he knows her as Madge’s friend 😭😩🤧.

Awww Katniss got presented a medal when her father died, I forgot 🥺🥺🥺

“Bet my buttons” is the worst phrase in history 🤨😐🤭

I like that Katniss’ dead father still has a reputation around these parts 🤧

Helps my fic writing brain to clock it for future reference

Maybe I’m just not nice but I don’t see how Prim is so wonderful that no one can help but love her. Like idk. I feel like this is just Katniss’ bias leaking through. Which is fine it’s better than some clinically detached narrator I hate those FYI

Omg everyone is saluting Katniss and she’s realizing people adore her 🥰🥰

Also ... does this mean Peeta did the three finger salute to her just before being called himself? Idk random thoughts, ignore me.

Katniss is in danger of crying. If this was me, I’d just be sobbing on the ground already.

Haymitch , the og rebel. Looking right into the cameras and calling the Capitol out.

Also ironic how the first thing Haymitch says to / about Katniss is “I like her!” when he spends the rest of the series pretending he, in fact, does not.

“Oh no, not him” is such a love interest introduction, y’all. Gale never stood a chance.

I like how Katniss considers it bad luck for her that Peeta was called 😅. Like... already taking ownership of the boy, sweetheart?

I feel like this is a good time to remind people that medium height is like 5’10. Stop headcanoning Peeta short. Poor Joshy though.

I like how she has never spoken to Peeta but describes the way his hair falls in waves over his forehead 😭🤧

Seems like Katniss thinks Peeta took being called relatively well.

“He has two older brothers, I know, I’ve seen them in the bakery” why is she already trying to defend herself to the audience like “I wasn’t really paying any attention to Peeta Mellark I just happened to notice he had brothers because I saw them once okay?”

Omg Katniss just outright asserting that Peeta’s middle brother definitively won’t volunteer for him. Girl, you just said you don’t know him or his family 😅😅😅.

“Why him?” Still has such a destined, soulmates feel to it. I know they weren’t destined and that’s what a lot of people admire about their relationship but the writing here has always had such a “this guy right here is her soulmate” slant to it, I’m sorry.

“He’s probably forgotten our only interaction. But I haven’t. And I know I never will.” Still continuing with the soulmate-y narration here, Suz Suz, I see.

Oh my god I don’t even remember this line but it’s so sad 🥺🥺🥺🥺🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧🤧😩😩😩😩😩

“The numbness of his loss had passed, and the pain would hit me out of nowhere, doubling me over, racking my body with sobs. ‘Where are you?’ I would cry out in my mind. ‘Where have you gone?’”

I’m so sad now. 😭😭😭

I like that Katniss said “no amount of pleading from Prim” would affect her mother’s depression, as if Katniss easily believes that her own pleas don’t matter but her sister’s are what’s impossible to ignore.

She really needs to stop putting Primmy on this pedestal though it’s not as cute the second or third read around.

“I suppose now that my mother was locked in some dark world of sadness, but at the time, all I knew was that I had lost not only a father, but a mother as well.” I feel like this is just criminally undiscussed. Katniss didn’t know or understand or grasp what depression even was. Like it’s hard enough for kids to forgive parents who abandon them to mental illness when they’re aware what mental illness is. Let alone if you’re just stuck for months / years, not knowing that your mother was sick, instead thinking she just stopped caring for you.

Omg Katniss saying she couldn’t let Prim go to a community home 🤧. Selfless of her. But also sister worry about yourself.

I’m just kidding, I know it’s her character to only be concerned with her little sister above all else.

Mr. Everdeen hating how coal dust settled on everything in the Seam is such a small but interesting detail.

Omg so the meadow is a common place to find corpses of those who starved to death? We maybe should stop romanticizing it.

I like that Mr. Everdeen took Katniss places with him but was like “Hmm, imma leave Prim home, she isn’t cut out for the hunting life”

Idk Katniss being too afraid and shy to go to the Hob without her dad is such a little kid thing though.

Katniss explaining that she was essentially in the merchants backyard

She was essentially dying in Peeta’s backyard 🤧

Wow, I forgot how blatantly violent Peeta’s mother was

Maybe it’s just Katniss’ perspective but every interaction is just her screaming

Aww, his mother called him a stupid creature, why don’t I remember this.

This is so sad omg.

Poor both of them.

One’s starving to death, the other’s utterly abused mentally, verbally and physically.

What’s a weal?

I always read that word as a welt.

Ok I googled it, it’s a big red swollen mark.

So same thing.

Omg now Katniss is saying Mrs. Mellark hit him with an object weapon. This just keeps getting more and more.... sad.

Honestly I haven’t read the books cover to cover since I was a teenager, some of this is a surprise to me.

I always wondered though how that bread was any good, it literally fell onto the wet ground. 😟🤢

Aww, Katniss saying Peeta would get a full beat down if discovered that he burned the breads to feed her 🥵🥵🥵

Okay but if his mother hit him with an object and his eye swoll up and blackened the next day, that could be another reason why he tossed the bread in her general direction and didn’t look at her. I know it was so he wouldn’t be caught by his mother but also he probably couldn’t even see clearly where she was.

The dandelion symbolism 🤧😅😭🥳

Her sarcasm 🤣🤣🤣

Katniss just keeps comparing Peeta to the loaves of bread 😅😅😅

Also she keeps calling him warm and solid and steady

I’m starting to think unconsciously she was already finding herself attracted to him even here.

Him squeezing her hand reassuringly and her chalking it up to a nervous spasm 🙃

I hope when they got married they got a nice screencap of this shot of them on TV facing the crowd, shaking hands.

Make a nice anniversary photo.

Okay, that’s all for my thoughts on chapter two! 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

[haikyuu-bf-scenarios]

Yamaguchi Tadashi: Second Encounter

First Meeting

*not edited*

It’s official

The coffee shop has run out of almond milk

Before your shift you stop in the store to get some

While there you spot a cute little Haworthia plant

Totally not bc the little spots remind you of a certain someone’s freckles

Nope

After buying your plant and milk you head to the shop to see your sister working the register

Putting your stuff on the counter and milk in the fridge you take

over the register

Doing your hw while helping people

when your sister finally notices she forces you to take a break to do your hw

“But you shouldn’t have to work alone”

“But you need to do your work and I’m your boss”

Not able to argue w/ her you grab your stuff and move to a table

After sometime your sister brings you a cortadito

“Hey, here’s your drink. I saw you bought some almond milk so I used that”

“Oh, uh,,, thanks”

Is that milk for you, no

Are you gonna tell your nosey sister that, hell no

But it seems the customers around you had a different idea

“Um, actually...” stop “She bought that for a customer who’s lactose intolerant and doesn’t like skim”

“You bought expensive milk for someone you barely know?”

“No! It’s for me I actually really like almond milk”

You take a sip and hum in not-so-fake pleasure bc it actually is pretty good

“Lies,” shut up “it’s for that cute first year that goes to your school, Yamaguchi”

You pushed yourself over top the booth to look at them in shock

“You know his name?”

“It’s on his bag”

“Oh”

“Back-up a bit. You have a crush?”

Nosey sisters are the worst

“No, I just felt bad that we didn’t have what he wanted!”

“Uh-huh” She stared at you, not believing your bullshit for even a second

“Mhmm” You stared back in challenge

After few beats of silence your sibling staring contest was interrupted by a customer over her shoulder

You look down at you phone to check the time

“You’re here early!”

It was only 19.55, he shouldn’t be here for another hr and 15 mins

“I didn’t know there was a set time I needed to be here at” He smiled cheekily

‘Don’t be cute right, now pls’

“There isn’t- I mean you can show up whenever you want, you’re just her at 9,,, normally”

“Practice ended earlier than normal”

“Oh.”

A weird silence followed this

The girl next to you exchanged looks w/ your sister

That was before you made the most horrifying realization

“You came for a drink”

You jumped out of your seat and rushed to the counter

And when I say jumped I mean jumped

You almost knocked your poor sister over 

‘stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid-’

Yamaguchi shuffled over to the counter to wait for his drink

So did your sister, entertained beyond belief at your frantic demeanor

Once you made him his drink, you said “Sorry about that, you can study now-”

“My stuffs all over your usual table!”

‘stupid stupid stupid stupid-’

Mortified you hop over the counter to get their quicker

“Ah, no, it’s fine. I can sit somewhere else.”

Sweetie, no, you cannot, they won’t let you. This is your table and your alone

You pause to look at him “But this is your table”

Before he can respond you’ve cleared your stuff off the table

Not knowing what else to say Yamaguchi focuses on the plant you just set down “Your plants cute. Does it have a name?”

‘Does it have a name?! It’s not a pet. Dumbass’ - Yama right now

Before you all come for me this boy is friends w/ Tsukishima, he cusses

“Uh, no, not yet. I just got him today.”

You don’t even think it’s weird for him to ask, you precious bean you

Tbh, this is the least awkward interaction the whole night

He nods w/ pursed lips before flinching a smile and scurrying to his seat

As soon as his back is turned you slump against the counter in embarrassment

Your sister comes over and gives you a sympathetic pat on the back

“That was a train wreck”

“Shut up”

BONUS:

“That was rough kid, you alright”

Oh look it’s everyone’s favourite meddling college student, back for one last time

“mmmmmmmm” He’s also slumped on the table FYI

“Yeah alright bud, I feel that”

masterlist