#Ezekiels oh hi simon

[ravenrose18]

My Personal Savior

Chapter 6- The Jester and The King

(Long Chapter)

"Hello, Boss." A sly voice spoke in the darkness behind him. Negan's smile faded a little. He had thought that he'd be free from business, but apparently, he was wrong. Of course, there was a chance that it could go quickly, given who the voice belonged to. After a second, he turns around to face the culprit. His eyes met with his right-hand man, who was sitting on the edge of the table. He was leaned over, his elbows sitting atop his knees, letting his arms lazily hang down. "Simon, why in the hell do you like to lurk around in the dark like some damn walker?" Negan grumbled. "Sorry, Boss. Just like keeping you on your toes." Simon jested. He moved his arms to his sides, giving himself a little push off the table so that he could slide off with ease and land on his feet. Negan raised his brow for a moment, before beginning to move towards a seat at the table. "So, what were you doing in here anyway?" Simon sighed, slipping his thumbs into the pockets of his pants. "Just contemplating, boss." "Contemplating or conspiring?" Negan teased as he plopped down in the chair. He lifted Lucille, before laying her across the table in front of him.

Simon took a seat nearby him, almost immediately placing his elbows upon the table, as he began to lean towards his leader. "Just thinking about our situation with the Kingdom, Negan. No need for paranoia." He spoke, his voice a low growl. "Good, and I take it that Gavin is still letting Ezekiel shit on him?" Negan questioned, leaning forward a little with interest. He didn't want to kill any more of the Kingdom's people, but if his hand was forced, then he'd have no choice. "So far, no. Gavin says that the king is 'gracious of our mercy' and is working to make up for their shortcomings. But, I was thinking, if this has become a problem, then maybe a little reminder of our strength could solidify things. Make sure it doesn't happen again."

Negan's smile faded immediately, his face enveloped by a cold stare. "I gave Ezekiel a warning. If he's got the message, then there's no need to flex our muscles just yet."Simon gave a nod, seeming to immediately drop the idea upon his word. "Fair enough, boss. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't keep a close eye on him. We don't need him getting any bright ideas." Negan relaxed once more, his grin returning to his face. He placed his hand upon Lucille's handle, tapping upon the wood twice with his index finger. "Oh, they won't forget, Simon. And if Ezekiel slips up again, well. We'll just have to remind him in a way he won't soon forget." Simon's sly grin appeared on his lips once more, before he gave a nod. "Fair enough, boss... Well, that's all I had to say, so I'll be taking my leave."

Negan flashed his hand as permission for the dismissal, leaning back in his chair. "Fine, and if you see a girl walking here, try not to frighten her, will ya?" He joked. Simon chuckled a little, giving a nod. "Will do, boss." With that, he lingered for only a moment longer, before leaving Negan to his lonesome within the office. Raven finished getting ready she walked towards the door she looked at herself in the mirror before walking out the door she walked towards the stairs she looked around seeing how empty the hallways were she wasn't sure where everyone was she got up the stairs on the floor Negan office is she sees a tall skinny man as she gets to the top of the stairs she never seen him before. Simon met eyes with her as he neared the stairs, before stopping in place. He glanced her up and down, appearing to be sizing her up. After a brief second, a cunning smirk appeared on his lips as he made eye contact once more. He lifted his hands onto his hips before he began to speak. "You're that new girl, aren't you? That crazy one that everyone's been buzzing about.."

Raven looked up at him and had her knife hidden on her thigh just in case. "Ummm yeah, I guess I am the new girl I don't know what the big deal about me though I thought it be better to meet the leader face to face to know who I'm dealing with and what I need to do for him and how to stay on his good side." She says smirking as she crosses her arms. Simon raised his brows, slightly tilting his head downward and to the left for a moment, before straightening up again. A brief and quiet huff of amusement escaped his nostrils before he began to speak, "A girl that cuts straight to the chase. I like that. That is something you just don't see every day." His grin widened a little more, before giving a subtle nod. "Name's Simon, Negan's right-hand man." Raven looks at him and smiles "I'm Raven. I need to um meet Negan he's waiting for me." She says as she walks a little past him having her back towards Negan's office. She doesn't know how to continue a conversation with Simon she does not like his vibe he's creepy she has a bad feeling bout him. Simon nodded and moved his hand as a gesture for her to go ahead. "Well, let's not keep the big man waiting, shall we?" He took one step downstairs, before turning to look at her one last time. "Good luck. The boss can be a real charmer." He spoke, his sly smirk unable to leave from his lips. Afterward, he continued on his way to get back to work, still grinning to himself. As friendly as he acted and sounded, there was just something off about him. Something more than met the eye.

Meanwhile, Negan was humming a little tune, impatiently tapping his fingers upon Lucille as he awaited Raven's arrival. He had been listening to the conversation the entire time, slightly annoyed that Simon ignored the last thing he had said to him. Raven smirks and chuckles as she walks over to the door and rolls her eyes. Raven knew how much of a charmer Negan could be and that's what she loved bout him that smile made her heart beat so fast and it made her smile. She stands in front of his office knocks on the door and waits for his response or open the door. Negan's humming stopped upon the knock, his distant eyes instantly gaining life once more. He turned his head to look at the door, before standing up from his seat and strolling over, his boots echoing as he walked across the floor. Usually, he wouldn't bother getting up and would call someone in instead, but he wanted to be respectful and inviting to her. When he opened the door and saw her dress, his eyes widened slightly, before his smile grew a little more. "Wow.." He muttered softly to himself.

Raven looks up smiling and blushing looks up at him "Good evening Negan I um hope you don't mind if I dress you I haven't dressed up like this in a long time so I thought I got all pretty up. I mean I think I overdid, to be honest with you." She says looking down blushing Negan smiled in return, making eye contact with her. He took notice of her blush, a scoff of amusement making his shoulders bounce a little. The temptation to tease her about it was pretty strong, but he managed to refrain himself."Good evening and that's fine, sweetheart.. I don't think you overdid anything, you look beautiful." Raven looks up into his eyes and blushes and smiles "Thank you Negan I have met your right-hand man out there he's um interesting, to say the least... he kinda creepy me out." She says as she rubs her upper arm uncomfortable Negan returns the smile, a hint of sincerity shining through his rough exterior. "You're welcome." After what she said about Simon, his smile faded a little and he sighed. "That's just Simon doing his thing. Keeps everyone on their toes, you know? But, if he continues bothering you, then I'll be sure to get the message through to him." He promised... Raven looks at him and nods "Yeah he just checked me out by looking me up and down. And apparently, your group is talking bout me on how I'm crazy for talking to you." She says as she walks inside his office walking past him and she looks around his office

He let her walk past, before following her inside. "He was checking to see how athletic you were, see if you could be useful in a fight." He explained. Of course, there was more to his tactics, but he didn't feel right to give those up just yet. Sure, they were good friends, but if he were to tell her and she brought it to light, then it could cause a shift in the power dynamics within the sanctuary. Something that he greatly feared, as it could be their downfall. What she said next brought a brief laugh out of him. "That's because a lot of people are too scared to speak to the ringmaster themselves. They usually speak to the lower ranks and learn from there. But you wanted to speak to me alone." He explained. The office wasn't fancy like his room. It had some hanging lights above a large table surrounded by chairs and a few shelves. The most interesting thing in the room had to be the large map of Virginia along with all of the roads. Marked on it were symbols representing the Sanctuary, their outposts and lookout points, the communities where they received supplies, as well as the routes those supplies were taken. Negan looked around the room himself for a moment, before looking at her once again. "I was going to have our little dinner and dance back in my room, I just had to take a meeting in here and didn't know how long it would take, so I wanted us to meet here."

Raven walks around his office walks over to the map looks at it and shakes her head "No Negan he was checking me out like my body Simon said I was the new crazy one everyone is talking bout and I think something is going on with you and this group. What are you not telling me Negan?" She asks as she stares at the map seeing the symbols on the map. He watched her walk up to the map, a deep sigh escaping his lips at what she said. "Well, if he does or so much as insinuates something, then I'll take care of it." He promised, his tone firm. He wasn't trying to be threatening to her, he was just a little tense at the thought that Simon might do something. His right-hand man had never done something like this before, at least to his knowledge, but he trusted Raven's word. When she brought up the communities, he smiled slightly before shaking his head. "That's nothing to worry about, darling. It's just business... But, if you must know, we get supplies from those places. We offer them protection, and they give us supplies in return." He explained.

Raven glances up at him and smiles softly. "You got to do what you have to. But look, Negan, you don't have to be afraid to tell me your business is a leader. Nothing scares me anymore. Negan, I dealt with a lot worse with my father, and this world is a piece of cake compared to my childhood. And with your right-hand man, I know you will protect me but I can protect myself, but shouldn't you have a group meeting bout me and what not bout how they chatter or gossip should stop and you should warn them if they do anything or are you keeping me a secret bout being someone you knew from before the apocalypse?" She asks. He returned the smile. "I'll try to keep that in mind. And I know that you can handle yourself. You're a good fighter, but it's still my job to keep everyone here safe. There are 200 fighters here with even more workers. Every time I lose one or one gets hurt, that shit's on me. Whether I'd like it to be or not.." He explained. When she mentioned introducing her to the rest, a look of realization spread across his face. "Damn it, you're right. I am all over the place today." He joked, a small grin on his face. "Well, would you like me to introduce you to our motley crew or would you like dinner first?" Raven smiles and looks at him "Let's enjoy our evening Negan I'm starving and I missed having an evening with you Negan. Plus I got dressed for you not for your crew especially since most of them are men." She says she wasn't sure how Negan was going to introduce her to his group but hopefully, she wouldn't be a target of eyes, and or jealous especially his wives.

Negan smiled in return, before giving a nod. He reached for the brass door knob, opening it for her before stepping aside. Negan gestured his arm for her to exit the room ahead of him, still acting like a gentleman to his guest. "Well, in that case, let's get this show on the road." Raven smiles as she walks towards the door and she puts her hand on his chest as she walks past him outside his office and looks back at him. I hope this evening goes well Negan I don't want our evening to be interrupted... just me and you Negan that's all I want." She says as she smiles softly and holds her hand out towards him.

Negan smiled in return, his eyes following her as she began to walk by. However, when he felt her hand on his chest, his gaze immediately looked down at it. He stared at it for a second, so taken aback by the action that he couldn't find a smart quip to say about it. His train of thought was interrupted further as she spoke up once more. Negan lifted his head to meet her gaze, the corners of his lips forming a grin. "I can assure you that the night is all ours." When it was offered to him, Negan took her hand into his own. He was tempted to kiss the top of it but refrained himself from doing so. After all, if one of his wives saw, then that would be one hell of a thing to discuss.

Raven smirks and giggles as she notices he is lost for words for a few seconds "If I wouldn't say Negan Smith you seem to be lost for words just there. Is something bothering you or on your mind?" She asks as she walks down the hall with him holding his hand. They had always been flirty either each other but something made him choke up she needed to also refrain from showing her feelings but harmless flirting shouldn't be any harm. He smiled in return, before laughing along with her. "Well, I wasn't exactly expecting someone to feel my left pec, but you've certainly got my attention now, sweetheart." He quipped, his grin forming into more of a smirk as he teased. He had always enjoyed flirting and joking with her, but now he had to be a little cautious about it. At least while they were in the eye of the public.

Raven giggles and looks him up and down "I mean Negan you and I always flirted with each other even around Lucille. Do I embarrass you or something or are you afraid of being caught?" She asks as her smirks go away as they stand in front of his bedroom door and have her back to him. She felt her feelings for him coming back she never stopped loving Negan after he saved her from her ex-boyfriend. She felt hurt that he had multiple wives but it's the apocalypse who fucking cares as long as he's happy with them, she just needs to hide how upset she is and enjoy the evening. He looked at her and chuckled briefly after what she had said. "Darling, there is nothing you can say or do that is gonna embarrass me. It's the second option." His words, though true, owned a hint of a playful tone. He took a step forward, carefully squeezing past her so that he could reach the door. Once there, he took a worn brass key from his left chest pocket and inserted it into the door, unlocking it before pushing the door open. He stood off to the side so that she could walk into the room ahead of him as usual.

Raven walks into the room and looks back at him confused "You're afraid of getting caught why? What's the reason are you afraid of something happening?" She asks as she crosses her arm as she messes with her necklace. She doesn't understand why being caught was going to be such a big deal or her being around at all. He began to enter the room behind her but stopped in place when she turned around. He released a sigh, turning around to take a brief look behind him before looking at her once more. "Well, my wives might get jealous, and we don't want green-eyed monsters bursting down the door, now do we?" He joked. His eyes fell upon the necklace once more, his smile brightening. "You kept that old thing? I'm surprised it didn't get lost in all the mess out there."

Raven sighs and rolls her eyes "Don't change the subject Negan look if you're that worried bout you're "wives" being jealous of me and you spending time with me then maybe we shouldn't talk or hang out... because I'm not afraid to slap bitch for being jealous of me there nothing to be jealous bout. I'm assuming you have beautiful wives especially more beautiful than me so there's nothing to be jealous bout especially when you tell everyone how you know me." She says with her hands on her hips. His smile faded slightly after what she said. "You don't like the fact that it's plural, do you?" He asked, shaking his head a little after a moment. After standing completely still for a brief second, his arms shrugged, "You're right, I don't know what I'm so worried about. You'll knock them straight on their asses the moment that they decide to give you shit. And don't sell yourself so short, you're beautiful." He spoke as his grin grew back to its original form.

Raven looks at him and blushes slightly "I mean you're going to tell everyone how you know me right? Or are you going to keep that a secret? And to answer your question bout the necklace I never lose it because I couldn't lose the one thing that reminds me of you and it helps me stay calm." She says Negan met her gaze, nodding subtly in response. "Of course, I'm going to say. Besides, the longer you keep something from a group of people, especially one like this, the more it festers." He explained a brief and quiet sigh to follow. As she spoke more of the necklace, his smile became a little softer. "Well, it's a good thing we aren't separated anymore, huh?" A hint of sincerity in his voice. After a moment, he gestured his hand to the inside of his room, trying to bring attention back to the occasion. "Well, let's get this dinner going, shall we?"

Raven smiles softly and nods "Yeah yeah I'm sorry I'm just considering and making sure you're okay and that with everything I'm learning bout how you are now and what you've been doing it's a bit shocking and hard to take in a bit." She says she felt bad for bringing the mood down at the beginning of their evening together. She just hopes nothing bad happens or that he is not upset for being like she is because of finding out bout his "wives" He lifted his head slightly as she said her apology, already able to guess where this was heading. She had been showing signs of dislike for his actions for a while, and he already knew she wasn't one to shy away from speaking her mind. Negan's grin widened before a brief laugh escaped his throat. "Of course I'm fine. The world has changed, Raven. Had to adapt to survive. It's a different game now."

Raven looks at him and nods "Yeah I know it took me so much to adapt to while being alone out there in the woods it was so hard to have a shelter to sleep, food to find, and struggling to stay alive and stay sane. I barely got sleep out there, especially with my nightmares and nobody watching my back for walkers." She says as she looks down she still has nightmares from her childhood but the nightmare consists of her losing Negan either by walkers or him dying and her ending up alone. Negan's smile faded, a look of understanding creeping onto his face. He couldn't imagine living in the woods for all of those years by himself. The kind of physical and psychological horror it would cause. He knew for certain that he wouldn't have been able to handle it and would likely have gone crazy. Even with a group as large as this, he at times feared losing his sanity. After a moment, a small smile with a hint of reassurance appeared on his face. "Well, you shouldn't have to fret your pretty head about that any longer. We have a secure shelter, a good amount of food and medicine, and a community that has each other's back. If one person has a problem, it's all of our problems. I'm not entirely sure about how to help the nightmares though." He assumed that her nightmares probably involved her past trauma. It never crossed his mind once that they could involve him.

Raven looks into his eyes and shrugs "I know Negan and the nightmares I deal with all the time I wake up from them and never go back to sleep I get a maximum 4 hours of sleep maybe less just depends you don't have to worry bout me and my nightmare Negan I've had them all my life so I can't stop them I think the only time they stopped was when I lived with you and Lucille for a little bit before the apocalypse started." She says she didn't want to tell him her nightmares because it's not like he's going to comfort her every night knowing he has his wives to spend time with at night and being a leader takes his time as well.

Negan met her gaze. Although he was once more hiding behind his tough-guy act, he was still concerned about her. Sleep is just as important as food or water, and lack of any of those could cause serious problems. Problems that he couldn't bear to see Raven go through. "Well, if they don't ease up in a few days, then go visit the doctor. He should have some sleeping pills that you can use." He knew better than to pry and see what her nightmares consisted of. There were some lines that even he didn't cross. Raven looks down and nods and sighs as she walks around his room she hates that he suggests medicine but she can't force him to have all his time and attention on her. "It's fine Negan. It's not like I can die in my sleep now I'm not going to get used to this place so quickly but I'm going to at least keep my door locked and have a pistol or one of my knives under my bed. But you don't have to worry bout me Negan you got enough on your plate. Plus we used to be so close and tell each other almost everything." She says smiling slightly walking to the window and looking outside with her back towards him.

He walked further into the room, before shutting the door behind him so they could have privacy. He immediately made his way to a little kitchen area, getting supplies together so that he could start cooking. His shoulders bounced a little with amusement at what she said, but he couldn't blame her. Especially after what she's been through. "I don't blame you one bit, sweetheart. I don't care if you sleep with a whole damn arsenal, just as long as you don't use it on us. I wish the Satellite outpost would have had that idea, maybe they'd still be here.." He stood in silence for a moment, before taking a glance back at her as he continued cooking. "Right, I haven't told you about that yet. I lost a lot of my men recently at an outpost. Some self-righteous, little prick and his group killed them in their sleep. I got it under control now, but it still grinds my gears."

Raven glances back at him confused slightly and nods slowly as she looks back out the window. "Some people can be real assholes. I dealt with an asshole myself I was almost killed and raped because of it that's why I have stayed on my own I just couldn't trust anybody sometimes I could've even trusted myself with the lack of sleep and food I was hearing and seeing things sometimes. Like I sometimes see my parents, my ex, even you Negan." She says

Outside the window was a view of the Sanctuary's gardens. There was a lot, but it didn't seem big enough to be able to feed so many people. They hadn't expanded on the gardens due to depending upon other communities for their produce. Negan nodded in agreement. "You're damn right. This world just keeps making them too." When he heard about what happened, he stopped in his tracks. He turned around to look at her, his face showing that he was a little pissed. "The pieces of shit. Did they hurt you?" There was nothing in the world that he hated more than rape. Anyone who attempted or so much as insinuated such in the Sanctuary was dealt with by Negan himself. His face lightened up at what she said last, a little surprised at the information. "You missed me that much?" He teased, before shaking his head. "Sorry, that wasn't a good joke. But I'm glad you're here now."

Raven glances at him and smiles at his teasing but as soon as he asks if she got hurt she turns back to the window and frowns as she doesn't say anything its not like she hasn't been hurt like that before but once the apocalypse started she killed her parents think she never goes through what she went through again but some men can be pigs and not take no for an answer. She holds her necklace tightly and rubs it on her upper arm having him remind flashback to that moment in what happened to her. She was jumped from behind, grabbed hands tied behind her back, and got pinned down. But after what was going on she got the strength to defend herself by kicking him away with her feet and broke free from her binds and then she took her crossbow out and shot him in his crouch and then in his head.

Negan returned the smile but it faded as he watched her turn away and avoid the question. His heart sank a little, the realization of what she had possibly gone through hitting him like a ton of bricks. He didn't want anyone to have to go through that crap, especially not Raven. "Damn.." He spoke softly, a gentle sigh to follow. He moved away from the stove, putting the cooking aside for a moment as he made his way over. Negan took his place at her side, opening his arms as he offered a hug. As much as he wanted to go straight in for the hug, judging by how she was acting, he knew better than to try and force his affection. Raven looks over at him as tears start welling up in her eyes she quickly embraces him tightly. She was completely quiet she just kept hugging him but she couldn't just tell him what she had been through she killing the mood, and she felt guilty about this going on. She pulls away from the hug and wipes her tears away, I'm fine Negan it was in the beginning of all this." She says When she embraced him, he wrapped his arms around her, gently holding her close. Negan was a little surprised by her tight grip, but he kept his mouth shut. After all, right now was not a good time to make a quip about something. When she began to stir and move away, he let go of her so that she could do so. Negan opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. He knew she wasn't okay, he knew all too well. He wanted to argue and tell her to cut the bullcrap, but then he'd just be a hypocrite. Instead, he simply nodded. "Alright, if you say so.. Whenever you're ready, I'm all ears."

Raven closes her eyes and holds her arms crossed over her chest "Can I get some alcohol? I need it now please." She says as she walks over to the couch and holds her knees to her chest and covers her face with her knees. She just wants to make sure she just forgets bout this and moves on with the evening. Raven kept touching a scar on her inner arm where her tattoo is that she got with Negan she got that new scar from that man who attacked her she was so pissed that her tattoo got damaged the way it did. He gave a subtle nod before walking away to fetch the whiskey bottle from his pantry. After grabbing a whiskey glass from the dish cabinet, he made his way to the couch she sat on. Negan took a glance at her, concern evident in his brief gaze. He placed both the bottle and the glass on the coffee table in front of her for her to use, before preparing to walk away to continue cooking, but stopped in place as he took notice of the scar. His curiosity was bugging him, wanting to know what had happened since they were separated but he refrained. It wasn't like he was going to give her his whole life story since they last saw each other, why would he expect her to do the same? After a moment of silently staring at the scar, he strolled away from her and back into the kitchen so he could finish cooking. Raven glances up at the bottle and the glass she glances over at Negan walking away and she grabs the whiskey bottle and just drink from the bottle she closes her eyes feeling the burn going down her throat and she sighs. She just sits there touching the scar on her wrist and sips on the whiskey more she gets up with the bottle in her hand and walks over to the music he had she sees a tape and smiles when it wad label our songs. She puts it in the player and starts playing the music that was their playlist they made years ago she closes her eyes as she touches the player listening to the songs.

Negan was beginning to fix their plates but stopped in his tracks as he heard the music playing. He couldn't hide the reminiscent smirk that stretched across his face. Whenever he had a bad day, he'd seek refuge in his room and listen to the songs on that tape, allowing the music to take him back to a much simpler time. It was his little way of keeping sane in this mess. He finished up by putting the food on the plates and carrying it to the table. He carefully placed them both upon the glass top, before he allowed himself to lift his head to gaze over at her. When he did, a quiet laugh escaped him, seeing she was drinking straight from the bottle instead of the glass he had given her. "Don't drink too much or else I'll have to carry you back to your room." He teased.

Raven looks over at him as she smirks and sips from the bottle again and giggles "Hey I earned this mister survival is fucking hard and also trying to not go insane and kill myself in the process I should be rewarded the world badass woman award." She says, walking over to him and putting the bottle on the table. She felt a bit tipsy but as soon as she eats she should be fine she doesn't want Negan to get in trouble or for her to have to kick some bitches asses. He smiled in return, before shrugging his shoulders. "Well, Miss Badass, I'm afraid I don't have any medals to give, but how about you pick something special out from the market after this? My treat." He spoke, his tone playful but sincere. The market was full of all kinds of interesting stuff. Decorations, food, music, clothes, you name it. If she did end up getting drunk, then he didn't mind helping her back to her room. He'd deal with whatever repercussions came next if there were any. Raven smiles softly "Wow you have a market to reward people? Interesting I don't know what I would get since I never really got anything during my childhood. I hope I don't get you in trouble or have people get the wrong idea about me. I'm assuming people think we are sleeping together." She says giggling and sipping the whiskey again.

Negan gave a nod in response to what she said. "Yep. It gives people a good reinforcement for working, makes them more productive." He explained with a smile. As he heard about her childhood, his smile faded a little. His heart ached for her, the things she had to face since such a young age. His mind was brought out his thoughts as she commented on people's assumptions. Negan laughed upon her comment, shaking his head a little. "Probably. But I'll be sure to address the rumors. Can't have our newest addition getting dirt on her name, now can we?" He jested, his smile brightening.

Raven smiles and looks into his eyes "Negan listen I know the whole multiple wives thing got me upset but what is the real reason why you have so many? I mean you don't love them do you or is this a power thing? Because I know you're not forcing them but if they wanted to go back to their spouse without you making them scared or you killing their spouse I think it's a fear thing on why they don't leave. Negan I've noticed the fear in people's eyes and how they are around you." She says softly as she sits down at the table looking up at him. Negan's eyes widened a little as she spoke. He stood in silence for a moment as if her words had frozen him in place before he eventually took a seat as well. Negan's gaze hardened slightly, a flicker of vulnerability passing through. "Raven.. Fear is a powerful motivator. It keeps people in line and stops them from turning on each other. It's messy out there, and sometimes, you gotta be the big, bad wolf to keep the sheep alive." Raven looks at him and crosses her arms "But having multiple wives is that part of the fear and the power of being a leader. I don't know what all happened to you Negan other than losing Lucille but that is the way a leader should be. But this is your group, not mine and you do whatever you do I just don't want you to get hurt or your people finding the guts to stand up for themselves." She says

Negan sighed, raising his brows a little as she mentioned the wives again. "You are still upset about that, damn. I'm starting to think you're jealous or something." He teased, shrugging his shoulders. It was just a power thing. Something else to use to keep people in line, make them feel below him. Especially Dwight, who he seemed to target the most. Upon what she said last, he made eye contact with her once again. "I've been at this for years, if they were going to do something, they would have. They've had plenty of chances. I admit, I would instigate at times just to see. People enjoy their shelter and full-bellies. They're too afraid to start a confrontation and lose it all." Raven looks at him and sighs and shrugs as she sips from the whiskey bottle again just staying quiet she doesn't want to have this conversation again she knows she's jealous of his wives but she doesn't want to show it she's just showing more concern for Negan's well being and happiness. She doesn't trust anyone especially if his "wives" are scared of him or they might have a plan to kill him if they were brave enough.

Negan relaxed when it seemed she had dropped the topic. Even he didn't want to keep having that conversation. It just reminded him of all of the repulsive things he had done to keep the people in line. He didn't like doing it, truly, but he felt like he had to keep his people alive. Negan released a sigh, eventually finding his voice after a couple of moments of silence. "So, did you travel at all during those years? Go anywhere interesting?" He spoke, before beginning to eat. He had used the same recipe he had since before the apocalypse. It was rather simple, but given the times they now faced, the ingredients could still be a pain to find at times. Luckily, he had them on hand at the time. Raven sips the whiskey and sighs she shakes her head "No after I killed my parents I went back to your house and.... saw it was burnt to the ground I thought you were dead but I kept trying to find you i rode my motorcycle everywhere I could think on where you be at but never could find you." She says as she takes a bite of her food and softly smiles thinking back to when he made this for her in the past.

He froze for a moment after hearing about her parents. Sure, they were horrible people, but it still hurt to lose family. He wasn't sure to comfort her or congratulate her, so he instead stayed silent about it for now. "Yeah. After I burned the house down, I stayed on the move. Ran into people along the way, but every single time, they'd die on me. It was like I was a walking plague. I stayed alive but I was forced to watch others die. Then I ran into Dwight's group, and you know the rest from there, but I must say I'm flattered to know you came looking for me." He ate a little more, smiling as the familiar taste filled his senses. He always prided himself on his cooking. Especially when it came to spaghetti. After a moment, he looked up from his plate, putting his attention on her. "Anyways, enough about people dying. What kind of motorcycle is it, or do you not know?" Raven looks up at him after she takes another bite and shakes her head "It was a Harley Davidson Sport glide but it died on me a long time ago I've just been walking everywhere I go since then. So don't worry bout it Negan, and I'm sure you wouldn't let me out of your sight anyway for me to use a motorcycle to get anywhere like go to the nearby town for supplies of clothes that are more my style." She says

His eyes widened, a quiet whistle of awe escaping his mouth. "A Harley?" He repeated a grin on his lips. "Shit, if that was me, I would have pushed that thing the entire way here.. And I let people leave to explore, just as long as they go with a group of at least 5-7. There's a better chance of them returning that way." He explained, before taking another bite. Raven takes another bite and then she looks down at her plate and then she glances up at Negan "What if I just want to get some fresh air and be by myself Negan? You know me I need to be alone sometimes and being in a building doesn't work for me. Unless you don't want me to go out there if your roof is available for me to use instead. If not it's fine I'll lose my sanity by being in a room to be away from people." She says

Negan sighed, his eyes looking over to meet her gaze. He understood the need to be alone, but in times like these, being alone practically meant certain death. Something he wouldn't be able to bear if it ever happened to her. He already lost Lucille, he couldn't lose her too. "We do have access to the roof. Just if you do go up there, please be careful. I don't need you taking a flying leap of faith down into the courtyard." Raven looks at him like 'really' "Really Negan? I'll be fine its not like I'm going to commit suicide and if anything if you're so worried bout me then why don't you accompany me on going outside or on the road you know unless you are too busy of course like I know you will be but I can't get in your way of being a leader so.." she says she takes her last bit of food and takes the whiskey bottle and sips on it as she stands up and sighs. He met her gaze, his eyes expressing that he had regretted his joke. "I'm sorry. That one went a little far." He admitted, his voice sincere. This time it wasn't just a hint of it, he was expressing it completely. He didn't mean it as a suicide joke, just that it was dangerous up there with whatever was left of the guard rails being rusty and unreliable. Though he didn't communicate that, it made sense for it to be taken differently. Of course, as she continued speaking, he moved back into his bravado attitude. A grin formed on his face at the offer, it would be the best option for both of them. He could have an eye on her and keep her safe, and she could get some fresh air without too many people around. "I think that's a beautiful idea. Just give me the word whenever you want to set sail and I'll be right behind you." He promised. He too finished up his food before standing up on his feet. He reached for a handout, silently offering to take her plate to the sink so that she wouldn't have to.

Raven hands him the plate and continues drinking from the bottle the bottle is almost empty she walks over to the music player and starts playing their song and smiles as she closes her eyes and she holds her necklace. The whiskey is kinda getting to her but she doesn't want to be a sloppy drunk when they still need to dance together to end their evening together. "Thank you." He shot her a grin, before bringing the dishes to the sink. The ceramic plates clinked together as they bumped against the metal pans he had already placed in there. He'd clean them after their get-together was over. When he heard their song playing, Negan couldn't hide the grin that appeared on his face. He strolled over to her side, extending his hand to her in a dramatic manner as if they were in a ballroom. "Miss Rose, may I have this dance?" Raven smiles and blushes and giggles she puts the bottle of whiskey down on the table looks at him and puts her hand in his hand her eyes start to well up in tears a bit but they are tears of happiness since her mind flashes back to the past before the apocalypse when they used to do this together. "Yes, Mr. Smith you may have this dance." She says

Negan smiled a little brighter as she took his hand. He gently placed an arm around her side, before beginning to take the lead in the dance after a moment. He was a little rusty at first, given how long it had been but it didn't take long for him to get the hang of it again. Negan had missed their dances together. What had started as a joke the first time that it happened, had turned into one of his favorite things before the apocalypse. For so long he thought that he'd never get to experience it again, but he was thankfully proven wrong. Raven smiles as tears run down her cheeks she looks up at him and smiles she then lays her head on his chest holds his hand tightly and puts her other hand on the side of his neck. She thought she never has this moment with him ever again but she was so happy to have this moment again I hope there will be more moments like this in the future.

Negan returned the smile, his eyes softening as he witnessed her tears. He gave a brief kiss on the top of her head, in an attempt to comfort her. He knew that they didn't seem like sad tears, but he still felt bad for her. "I was starting to think this would never happen again.." He admitted, a scoff of amusement escaping from his throat.

Raven smiles and blushes closes her eyes and nods "Yeah I felt like we never have this moment again we would've only had memories but unfortunately some memories fade out as years go by I'm just glad we have this tattoo we go together, the necklace you gave me and the only photo we have with each other to keep those memories alive at least to remember what you looked like." She says Negan smiled in return, nodding in agreement. "Yeah. It's a damn good thing we were wrong." He joked before his eyes lightened a little for a moment as he listened to her. He was still amazed at the idea that she had tried to find him for all that time and had cared so much about him. Sure, he had cared about her as well, but after Lucille, he was almost certain that he had lost her too. Every day he hoped that he was wrong, but as time passed his fear of her loss only grew stronger. It got to the point that he was starting to forget what she looked like, but thanks to her tattoos, he immediately recognized her. After a moment, he pulled himself out of his thoughts, not wanting to allow awkward silence to slip into their conversation."You missed me that much, huh?" He teased.

Raven looks into his eyes and smiles and blushes "Of course I did Negan why wouldn't I? You and Lucille were the only people who cared bout me without you I wouldn't have anybody I would've been dead a long time ago if I had been killed by my parents by my ex-boyfriend or by.... myself. I'm glad you saved me Negan I don't know what I do if I didn't have you in my life." She says softly as she looks deep into his eyes. Negan's expression lightened, a flicker of vulnerability slipping through. He and Lucille had loved her company, although Lucille wasn't quite on board with it at first. She had pulled Negan to the side and chewed him out for bringing a stranger home. However, it didn't take long for Lucille to accept the idea. From then on, Negan had spent as much time as he could with Raven, treating her like he had known her for his entire life. But that sweet man had died with Lucille. At least, it had felt that way.

After a moment, he finally decided to speak. "Raven, I-" Before he could speak any further, a loud knock at the door interrupted him. Negan stopped in his tracks, putting his attention to the direction of the sound. "Somebody better be dying, you prick!" He snapped to whoever was on the other side, pretty pissed by the interruption. After a pause of silence, a voice spoke up, his tone cautious. "Sorry, Boss. It's just, you left Lucille in your office." The Savior explained. Negan's expression lightened. He hadn't realized it before, but he didn't remember carrying his beloved bat back with him. He sighed, shaking his head slightly. "Leave her by the door. I'll get her in a minute. And be careful with her. I find one dent or scratch on her that wasn't there, and you'll be treating her to a 3-course meal of your skull, is that understood?" Negan snapped, his grave voice laced with hatred, yet his eyes held evidence of concern for the weapon. The voice rose again, shaking as the savior trembled. "Understood, Boss." A couple of seconds later, the savior could be heard walking away, deeper into the concrete halls. As the sound of his footsteps became softer and softer, Negan placed his attention back on her, his smile returning as his eyes landed on her face. "Sorry about that, sweetheart. Now, where were we?" Raven stands there and hears what they said and looks at him "What did he just say? Did they just call that bat you carry around Lucille? Negan I... I don't understand why you would call that bat your late wife but I guess it's probably because of you wanting to keep her memories alive I guess." She says holding her arms crossed over her chest looks down and sighs.

His smile faded slightly before his brows raised as she questioned him. It had been a long time since someone had questioned his actions so much, and it was something rather hard for him to get used to. He pushed that aside for the moment, before giving a subtle nod, his smile returning to his face. "You, my dear, hit the nail straight on the head. Naming the bat after her. It's my way of keeping a piece of her with me." He explained Raven looked at her and sighed "But you use that bat for bash head? Or hurt people? I don't think naming your wife after a bat especially if you use it as a weapon to defend yourself or whatever. But I don't want this night to be ruined I just want to finish our evening together good and then we can talk tomorrow." She says His brows raised upon what she said, his mouth slightly agape for a second, before forming into a grin. "I'm sorry, are you saying that your night was almost ruined because I named a baseball bat?" He teased. After a couple of seconds, he shook his head with a brief laugh to follow. "Never thought I'd hear that one. But fine, let's enjoy our night, Princess."

Raven looks at him "No the night would've been ruined by me being so fucking negative and getting fucking drunk I don't care bout that bat of yours Negan you choose to do whatever you want. I'm sure Lucille wouldn't see it in a positive light but she's not here so." She says Negan laughed a little, leaning back for a moment before standing up straight once more. He stretched out both of his arms, before letting them drop to his sides once more as he shook his head a little. "Still got that fiery attitude. Still admire it. Unless of course, that's the alcohol talking." He sneered before continuing to speak, "Who knows? Maybe she would. But let's not argue, let's finish the night with a bang and talk more when we've had some sleep. Deal?" Raven looks at him and smiles "Yeah let's um finish the night with a bang. I ummm want to make sure that we spend time together as much as possible you never know what could happen the next day. I want you to know that I missed you and nothing is going to stop me from being by your side I never want to go another day without you ever again." She says

Negan's smile brightened. "Excuses, excuses. Miss Rose, I'm starting to get the impression that you're obsessed with me." He teased, his smile only growing more before he shrugged. "But I'll happily oblige. I missed you too, Rosie." He winked after he said the nickname. He knew that it seemed to bother her earlier, but he just couldn't help himself. The only amusement he found in the apocalypse was getting reactions out of people. "Anyways, what kind of grand finale were you imagining? Or would you rather get back to our dance, which was so rudely interrupted?" Raven blushes and shakes her head and looks down. She can't say how she wants this night to end because he's doesn't feel that way bout her so she just going to think ending the night here should be fine but she sad that she can't have that ending to a good evening together. "Well actually I'm getting pretty tired I should get back to my room and try to get some rest." She says Negan lifted his brows and tilted his head slightly to the right, curious about Raven's behavior. He could tell she was keeping something to herself, but he wasn't quite sure of what it could be. Luckily, he didn't pry, figuring the alcohol had something to do with it. "Alright, some other time then. Do you need me to carry you to your room, princess?" He asked with a grin Raven smiled and giggled "No no I think I'll be fine I umm I'll walk slowly down the stairs. Only if you want to accompany me but you don't have to. I have protection if I need to use it." She says as she looks at him as she also shows her knife under her dress on her thigh. Negan's eyes widened a little when he saw the knife, a small smirk forming on his lips. Negan's eyes soon went back to her face. He began to speak but froze in place, seemingly letting his words roll around in his head for a moment. 5 seconds later, he finally spoke. "Well, sweetheart, knife or no knife, I'm coming with you whether you want me to or not. For tonight, I am your very own, bonafide guardian devil." He joked as he strode up to the door. He turned the brass knob, pushing the door open for her to walk out first.

Raven giggles and smiles and walks out of his room and looks back at him "Thank you Negan I remember when I didn't have a ride home from my job and I started walking home and those men started harassing me and you came just in time to save me and give me a ride home." She says Negan walked out behind her. He picked up Lucille who was propped up on the wall near the door, placing her inside of his room instead. Afterward, he shut and locked the door behind him. He would have carried his beloved bat with him, but he wanted to have both hands free just in case he had to catch her. He put his attention on her when she spoke, a smirk forming on his face as he thought back to the moment. "I remember that. Sprained my damn wrist after giving one a right hook, but it was worth it." He began walking down the stairs beside her, making sure to keep up with her pace. He had a hand slightly outstretched, ready to grab her in case she stumbled. Raven walks down the stairs her eyesight is a bit hazy, and she does have a bit of drunk walks, so she just kind of loses her balance and falls forward she tries grabbing the railing but misses. She remembered when she first got drunk when Negan and Lucille weren't home, and she drank whatever was in the cabinet she thought sounded good.

Negan tensed up when he saw her lose her balance, his face changing from his usual prideful expression into fear and concern. He grasped the collar on her jacket with one hand, before placing another on her chest to stabilize her and keep her from rolling down the stairs. "Woah, easy. Can't have you taking a stairway to heaven." Raven takes a breath and a second to catch her breath and looks into his eyes "Sorry I haven't had the time to practice walking downstairs with alcohol in my system." She says as she grabs the railing and grabs his shoulder making sure she is okay to continue down the stairs. When he saw that she was okay, he relaxed once more, a quiet sigh of relief escaping his lips. For a moment, he just knew he was going to see her roll down the metal stairs. Something that had a chance to kill her. Luckily, he had stopped her before such a thing could happen. Once she was stable, he let go of her, but he kept his arm close nearby. "It's fine. Well, even though you're out of practice with being tipsy, you sure as hell can do a good walker impression with you stumbling around like that." He teased, beginning to walk down the stairs once again when she was ready.

Raven smiles and giggles as she playfully pushes him and she grabs his arm for stability as she walks down the stairs she knows he is joking she always misses his teasing but sometimes she hates it too but that's part of who he is and she loves. Negan returned the smile as he laughed along with her. When he saw an opportunity, he had to slip in a witty remark. He couldn't help it. It was a habit that he couldn't break. It wasn't like he had tried either, though. He loved when he could get reactions from people, especially when he could get the reaction out of them that he wanted in the first place. Negan stuck by her side, making sure she didn't fall again. Raven smiles as they continue to walk and they get to her room "Well this is me. Thank you for a wonderful night Negan I hope we can have this evening as much as we can." She says as she leans against her door. She looked at him seeing the old Negan with that big smile and just looking at that handsome face and she felt her heart racing the alcohol wasn't affecting her anymore.

Negan stopped beside her when they reached the door, before meeting her gaze as she turned to face him. "You're more than welcome, Miss Rose, and I think I finally got my answer. You are obsessed with me. You just can't get enough, can you?" He quipped, his smile brightening. "But again, I'll be happy to oblige. Just name a time and place, and I'll be right there." Raven giggles and shakes her head "Okay okay Negan we should get some rest you must have a lot of stuff to do tomorrow." She says as she opens her door before she walks into her room she walks up to him and hugs him once she pulls away from the hug she puts her hand on his chest and kisses his cheek. "Goodnight Negan." She says as she walks towards her room. "Fine, I'll let you get your beauty sleep. Not like you need it, of course." He spoke with a grin. Upon the hug, Negan wrapped his arms around her in return, before letting her go as she stirred to move away. The kiss had taken him off guard, his eyes widening. However, he relaxed a couple of seconds later, still thinking she was under the influence. A bold smirk stretched across his lips as he prepared to tease her, "Well, aren't you just a generous little liquor fairy tonight? .. Goodnight, Raven. Sleep well." After a couple of seconds, he began to walk away so that she could get some rest.

Raven smiles and watches him "I'm not tipsy anymore Negan." She says as she walks away and closes the door behind her once she gets inside her room and sighs as she walks over the her bed and grabs a tank top and shorts to change into to sleep in. As soon as she finished getting dressed she lay down on the bed and looked up at the ceiling as she held her necklace in her hand and she closed her eyes slowly He stopped in his tracks upon processing what she said, before turning around. However, the door had already been closed by that point. Needless to say, he was a little taken aback by the revelation but after a few seconds, he simply shrugged his shoulders with a chuckle to follow. His smirk instantly returned to his face, before he resumed the journey back to his room. 

Next Chapter

@integra1127 @integra1127grimmreaper @jdmorganz @jdm-negan-mcnaughty-blog @justjdm @jdeanmorgan @jwritesfanfics @justjdm @negansource @negans-girl-blog @negans-dirty-girl @negandarylsatisfaction @negangifs @jdm-traash @jdmslut-red @jdmorganstuff @girlwiththenegantattoo @ghostwriter2203 @a-woman-with-claws-and-fangs @naughtyneganjdm @naughty-negan @naughty-negan-clan @naturallynegan @neganbabygirl @fanfictilltheend @neganandjdm @neganappreciation-blog @neganandtonyswife @neganandblake @neganandstevensdoll-blog @savedpeople @sanctuaryforthelost @jdmswh0re @jdms-flat-ass @jdmsimp @twdxtrevor @jdmorganstuff @jdmslut-red @jdm-traash @jeffreydaddydeanmorgan @jeffreydeanmorganconfession-blog @jeffreydeanmorgantrash @jeffrey-daddy-morgan @negansource @negans-girl-blog @negandarylsatisfaction @negangifs @sanctuaryforthelost

[m-twst-ocs]

😈 I'm in the mood to hear what your OCs think about peepaw Lilia!

Clover: "Lilia? Uh... I mean, he's cool. He scares me sometimes, whenever he pops out of nowhere."

Simon: "Mmn. He's fine enough. I don't really feel one way or another toward him."

Eli: "Oh he's cool! Mmn, we don't talk often, but I like him"

Mason: "...No. Just, no. He likes Malleus too much, I do not like him too much."

Liam: "...He's a bodyguard in a way... good at fighting... I respect him. He's hiding something, but I do respect him."

Carmen: "Meh!"

Tina: "...I surprisingly.. get along with a lot of Diasomnia students... and Lilia isn't an exception... He's pretty nice..."

Kaleena: "I'm in the Pop Music Club, so I definitely know him! He's pretty cool, y'know~"

Ilya: "I want to know more about him... Briar Valley, how long he's lived, what he knows, history... I must know..."

Ezekiel: "I trust him. He knows my original name and has never told anyone at the school about it, so I trust him that much. He's also pretty cool. I've seen a lot of sides of him..."

Pamela and Parker: "I think he's pretty cool." "He's observant." "Very good at knowing what's around him." "Hard to pull pranks." "Very hard."

Araiguma: "He's... smart. Funny. Nice. Cool. I like him. I like him a lot. He's good at knowing when I'm around. Even when I'm in tanuki form! He's smart and super cool! I think he's awesome!"

Inari: "I've known him for a while... he's nice. He certainly acts his age on occasion, but sometimes tries to make himself seem like a young man!"

[roman-catholic-mass-readings]

12th August >> Mass Readings (Except USA)

Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time 

or

Saint Jane Frances de Chantal, Religious 

or

Saint Muredach, Bishop 

or

Saint Attracta, Virgin 

or

Saint Lelia, Virgin.

Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time 

(Liturgical Colour: Green. Year: B(II))

First Reading Ezekiel 1:2-5,24-28 Ezekiel's vision of the glory of the Lord.

On the fifth of the month – it was the fifth year of exile for King Jehoiachin – the word of the Lord was addressed to the priest Ezekiel son of Buzi, in the land of the Chaldaeans, on the bank of the river Chebar. There the hand of the Lord came on me. I looked; a stormy wind blew from the north, a great cloud with light around it, a fire from which flashes of lightning darted, and in the centre a sheen like bronze at the heart of the fire. In the centre I saw what seemed four animals. They looked like this. They were of human form. I heard the noise of their wings as they moved; it sounded like rushing water, like the voice of Shaddai, a noise like a storm, like the noise of a camp; when they halted, they folded their wings, and there was a noise. Above the vault over their heads was something that looked like a sapphire; it was shaped like a throne and high up on this throne was a being that looked like a man. I saw him shine like bronze, and close to and all around him from what seemed his loins upwards was what looked like fire; and from what seemed his loins downwards I saw what looked like fire, and a light all round like a bow in the clouds on rainy days; that is how the surrounding light appeared. It was something that looked like the glory of the Lord. I looked, and prostrated myself.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm Psalm 148:1-2,11-14

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

Praise the Lord from the heavens, praise him in the heights. Praise him, all his angels, praise him, all his host.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

All earth’s kings and peoples, earth’s princes and rulers, young men and maidens, old men together with children.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

Let them praise the name of the Lord for he alone is exalted. The splendour of his name reaches beyond heaven and earth.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

He exalts the strength of his people. He is the praise of all his saints, of the sons of Israel, of the people to whom he comes close.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

Gospel Acclamation Psalm 147:12,15

Alleluia, alleluia! O praise the Lord, Jerusalem! He sends out his word to the earth. Alleluia!

Or: cf. 2 Thessalonians 2:14

Alleluia, alleluia! Through the Good News God called us to share the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. Alleluia!

Gospel Matthew 17:22-27 'They will put the Son of Man to death'.

One day when they were together in Galilee, Jesus said to his disciples, ‘The Son of Man is going to be handed over into the power of men; they will put him to death, and on the third day he will be raised to life again.’ And a great sadness came over them. When they reached Capernaum, the collectors of the half-shekel came to Peter and said, ‘Does your master not pay the half-shekel?’ ‘Oh yes’ he replied, and went into the house. But before he could speak, Jesus said, ‘Simon, what is your opinion? From whom do the kings of the earth take toll or tribute? From their sons or from foreigners?’ And when he replied, ‘From foreigners’, Jesus said, ‘Well then, the sons are exempt. However, so as not to offend these people, go to the lake and cast a hook; take the first fish that bites, open its mouth and there you will find a shekel; take it and give it to them for me and for you.’

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

----------------------------

Saint Jane Frances de Chantal, Religious 

(Liturgical Colour: White. Year: B(II))

(Readings for the memorial)

(There is a choice today between the readings for the ferial day (Monday) and those for the memorial. The ferial readings are recommended unless pastoral reasons suggest otherwise)

First Reading Philippians 4:4-9 If there is anything you need, pray for it.

I want you to be happy, always happy in the Lord; I repeat, what I want is your happiness. Let your tolerance be evident to everyone: the Lord is very near. There is no need to worry; but if there is anything you need, pray for it, asking God for it with prayer and thanksgiving, and that peace of God, which is so much greater than we can understand, will guard your hearts and your thoughts, in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, fill your minds with everything that is true, everything that is noble, everything that is good and pure, everything that we love and honour, and everything that can be thought virtuous or worthy of praise. Keep doing all the things that you learnt from me and have been taught by me and have heard or seen that I do. Then the God of peace will be with you.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm Psalm 130(131)

R/ Keep my soul in peace before you, O Lord.

O Lord, my heart is not proud nor haughty my eyes. I have not gone after things too great nor marvels beyond me.

R/ Keep my soul in peace before you, O Lord.

Truly I have set my soul in silence and peace. A weaned child on its mother’s breast, even so is my soul.

R/ Keep my soul in peace before you, O Lord.

O Israel, hope in the Lord both now and forever.

R/ Keep my soul in peace before you, O Lord.

Gospel Acclamation John 8:31-32

Alleluia, alleluia! If you make my word your home you will indeed be my disciples, and you will learn the truth, says the Lord. Alleluia!

Gospel Matthew 22:34-40 The commandments of love.

When the Pharisees heard that Jesus had silenced the Sadducees they got together and, to disconcert him, one of them put a question, ‘Master, which is the greatest commandment of the Law?’ Jesus said, ‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment. The second resembles it: You must love your neighbour as yourself. On these two commandments hang the whole Law, and the Prophets also.’

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

--------------------------

Saint Muredach, Bishop 

(Liturgical Colour: White. Year: B(II))

(Readings for the memorial)

(There is a choice today between the readings for the ferial day (Monday) and those for the memorial. The ferial readings are recommended unless pastoral reasons suggest otherwise)

Either:

First Reading Exodus 32:7-14 Moses pleads with the Lord his God to spare Israel.

The Lord spoke to Moses, ‘Go down now, because your people whom you brought out of Egypt have apostatised. They have been quick to leave the way I marked out for them; they have made themselves a calf of molten metal and have worshipped it and offered it sacrifice. “Here is your God, Israel,” they have cried, “who brought you up from the land of Egypt!”’ the Lord said to Moses, ‘I can see how headstrong these people are! Leave me, now, my wrath shall blaze out against them and devour them; of you, however, I will make a great nation.’ But Moses pleaded with the Lord his God. ‘Lord,’ he said ‘why should your wrath blaze out against this people of yours whom you brought out of the land of Egypt with arm outstretched and mighty hand? Why let the Egyptians say, “Ah, it was in treachery that he brought them out, to do them to death in the mountains and wipe them off the face of the earth”? Leave your burning wrath; relent and do not bring this disaster on your people. Remember Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, your servants to whom by your own self you swore and made this promise: I will make your offspring as many as the stars of heaven, and all this land which I promised I will give to your descendants, and it shall be their heritage for ever.’ So the Lord relented and did not bring on his people the disaster he had threatened.

OR: --------

First reading Deuteronomy 10:8-9 The Lord set apart the tribe of Levi to do him service

Moses said to the people: ‘The Lord set apart the tribe of Levi to carry the ark of the Lord’s covenant, to stand in the presence of the Lord, to do him service and in his name to pronounce blessing as they still do today. Levi therefore has no share or inheritance with his brothers: the Lord is his inheritance, as the Lord your God told him.’

OR: --------

First reading 1 Samuel 16:1,6-13 David is anointed by Samuel

The Lord said to Samuel, ‘Fill your horn with oil and go. I am sending you to Jesse of Bethlehem, for I have chosen myself a king among his sons.’ Samuel purified Jesse and his sons and invited them to the sacrifice. When they arrived, he caught sight of Eliab and thought, ‘Surely the Lord’s anointed one stands there before him’, but the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Take no notice of his appearance or his height for I have rejected him; God does not see as man sees; man looks at appearances but the Lord looks at the heart.’ Jesse then called Abinadab and presented him to Samuel, who said, ‘The Lord has not chosen this one either.’ Jesse then presented Shammah, but Samuel said, ‘The Lord has not chosen this one either.’ Jesse presented his seven sons to Samuel, but Samuel said to Jesse, ‘The Lord has not chosen these.’ He then asked Jesse, ‘Are these all the sons you have?’ He answered, ‘There is still one left, the youngest; he is out looking after the sheep.’ Then Samuel said to Jesse, ‘Send for him; we will not sit down to eat until he comes.’ Jesse had him sent for, a boy of fresh complexion, with fine eyes and pleasant bearing. The Lord said, ‘Come, anoint him, for this is the one.’ At this, Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him where he stood with his brothers; and the spirit of the Lord seized on David and stayed with him from that day on.

OR: --------

First reading Isaiah 6:1-2,3-8 'Here I am: send me'

In the year of King Uzziah’s death I saw the Lord of Hosts seated on a high throne; his train filled the sanctuary; above him stood seraphs, each one with six wings. And they cried out to one another in this way,

‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of Hosts. His glory fills the whole earth.’

The foundations of the threshold shook with the voice of the one who cried out, and the Temple was filled with smoke. I said:

‘What a wretched state I am in! I am lost, for I am a man of unclean lips and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have looked at the King, the Lord of Hosts.’

Then one of the seraphs flew to me, holding in his hand a live coal which he had taken from the altar with a pair of tongs. With this he touched my mouth and said:

‘See now, this has touched your lips, your sin is taken away, your iniquity is purged.’

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying:

‘Whom shall I send? Who will be our messenger?’

I answered, ‘Here I am, send me.’

OR: --------

First reading Isaiah 61:1-3 He has sent me to proclaim a year of favour from the Lord

The spirit of the Lord has been given to me, for the Lord has anointed me. He has sent me to bring good news to the poor, to bind up hearts that are broken;

to proclaim liberty to captives, freedom to those in prison; to proclaim a year of favour from the Lord, a day of vengeance for our God,

to comfort all those who mourn and to give them for ashes a garland; for mourning robe the oil of gladness, for despondency, praise.

OR: --------

First reading Jeremiah 1:4-9 Go and say whatever I command you and do not fear

The word of the Lord was addressed to me, saying,

‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you came to birth I consecrated you; I have appointed you as prophet to the nations.’

I said, ‘Ah, Lord; look, I do not know how to speak: I am a child!’

But the Lord replied, ‘Do not say, “I am a child.” Go now to those to whom I send you and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you to protect you – it is the Lord who speaks!’

Then the Lord put out his hand and touched my mouth and said to me:

‘There! I am putting my words into your mouth.’

OR: --------

First reading Ezekiel 3:17-21 Warn the wicked man, and you will live

The word of the Lord was addressed to me as follows, ‘Son of man, I have appointed you as sentry to the House of Israel. Whenever you hear a word from me, warn them in my Name. If I say to a wicked man, “You are to die,” and you do not warn him; if you do not speak and warn him to renounce his evil ways and so live, then he shall die for his sin, but I will hold you responsible for his death. If, however, you do warn a wicked man and he does not renounce his wickedness and his evil ways, then he shall die for his sin, but you yourself will have saved your life. When the upright man renounces his integrity to do evil and I set a trap for him, he too shall die; since you failed to warn him, he shall die for his sin and the integrity he practised will no longer be remembered; but I will hold you responsible for his death. If, however, you warn the upright man not to sin and he abstains from sinning, he shall live, thanks to your warning, and you too will have saved your life.’

OR: --------

First reading Ezekiel 34:11-16 I will look after my flock myself and keep all of it in view

The Lord God says this: I am going to look after my flock myself and keep all of it in view. As a shepherd keeps all his flock in view when he stands up in the middle of his scattered sheep, so shall I keep my sheep in view. I shall rescue them from wherever they have been scattered during the mist and darkness. I shall bring them out of the countries where they are; I shall gather them together from foreign countries and bring them back to their own land. I shall pasture them on the mountains of Israel, in the ravines and in every inhabited place in the land. I shall feed them in good pasturage; the high mountains of Israel will be their grazing ground. There they will rest in good grazing ground; they will browse in rich pastures on the mountains of Israel. I myself will pasture my sheep, I myself will show them where to rest – it is the Lord who speaks. I shall look for the lost one, bring back the stray, bandage the wounded and make the weak strong. I shall watch over the fat and healthy. I shall be a true shepherd to them.

Responsorial Psalm Psalm 15(16):1-2,5,7-8,11

You are my inheritance, O Lord.

Preserve me, God, I take refuge in you. I say to the Lord: ‘You are my God.’ O Lord, it is you who are my portion and cup; it is you yourself who are my prize.

You are my inheritance, O Lord.

I will bless the Lord who gives me counsel, who even at night directs my heart. I keep the Lord ever in my sight: since he is at my right hand, I shall stand firm.

You are my inheritance, O Lord.

You will show me the path of life, the fullness of joy in your presence, at your right hand happiness for ever.

You are my inheritance, O Lord.

Gospel Acclamation Mt23:9,10

Alleluia, alleluia! You have only one Father, and he is in heaven; you have only one Teacher, the Christ. Alleluia!

Or: Mt28:19,20

Alleluia, alleluia! Go, make disciples of all the nations. I am with you always; yes, to the end of time. Alleluia!

Or: Mk1:17

Alleluia, alleluia! Follow me, says the Lord, and I will make you into fishers of men. Alleluia!

Or: Lk4:18

Alleluia, alleluia! The Lord has sent me to bring the good news to the poor, to proclaim liberty to captives. Alleluia!

Or: Jn10:14

Alleluia, alleluia! I am the good shepherd, says the Lord; I know my own sheep and my own know me. Alleluia!

Or: Jn15:5

Alleluia, alleluia! I am the vine, you are the branches. Whoever remains in me, with me in him, bears fruit in plenty, says the Lord. Alleluia!

Or: 2Co5:19

Alleluia, alleluia! God in Christ was reconciling the world to himself, and he has entrusted to us the news that they are reconciled. Alleluia!

Gospel Matthew 9:35-37 The harvest is rich but the labourers are few.

Jesus made a tour through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the Good News of the kingdom and curing all kinds of diseases and sickness. And when he saw the crowds he felt sorry for them because they were harassed and dejected, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, ‘The harvest is rich but the labourers are few, so ask the Lord of the harvest to send labourers to his harvest.’

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

-----------------------------

Saint Attracta, Virgin    and/or

Saint Lelia, Virgin 

(Liturgical Colour: White. Year: B(II))

(There is a choice today between the readings for the ferial day (Monday) and those for the memorial. The ferial readings are recommended unless pastoral reasons suggest otherwise)

Either:

First Reading Song of Songs 8:6-7 The flash of love is a flame of the Lord himself.

Set me like a seal on your heart, like a seal on your arm. For love is strong as Death, jealousy as relentless as Sheol. The flash of it is a flash of fire, a flame of the Lord himself. Love no floods can quench, no torrents drown.

Were a man to offer all the wealth of his house to buy love, contempt is all he would purchase.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Or:

First Reading Hosea 2:16,17,21-22 I will betroth you to myself for ever.

The Lord says this:

I am going to lead her out into the wilderness and speak to her heart. There she will respond to me as she did when she was young, as she did when she came out of the land of Egypt. I will betroth you to myself for ever, betroth you with integrity and justice, with tenderness and love; I will betroth you to myself with faithfulness, and you will come to know the Lord.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm Psalm 44(45):11-12,14-17

R/ Listen, O daughter, give ear to my words. or R/ The bridegroom is here! Go out and meet Christ the Lord.

Listen, O daughter, give ear to my words: forget your own people and your father’s house. So will the king desire your beauty: He is your lord, pay homage to him.

R/ Listen, O daughter, give ear to my words. or R/ The bridegroom is here! Go out and meet Christ the Lord.

The daughter of the king is clothed with splendour, her robes embroidered with pearls set in gold. She is led to the king with her maiden companions.

R/ Listen, O daughter, give ear to my words. or R/ The bridegroom is here! Go out and meet Christ the Lord.

They are escorted amid gladness and joy; they pass within the palace of the king. Sons shall be yours in place of your fathers: you will make them princes over all the earth.

R/ Listen, O daughter, give ear to my words. or R/ The bridegroom is here! Go out and meet Christ the Lord.

Gospel Acclamation John 14:23

Alleluia, alleluia! If anyone loves me he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we shall come to him. Alleluia!

Or:

Alleluia, alleluia! This is the wise virgin whom the Lord found watching; she went in to the wedding feast with him when he came. Alleluia!

Or:

Alleluia, alleluia! Come, bride of Christ, and receive the crown which the Lord has prepared for you for ever.

Alleluia!

Gospel Matthew 19:3-12 Husband and wife are no longer two, but one body.

Some Pharisees approached Jesus, and to test him they said, ‘Is it against the Law for a man to divorce his wife on any pretext whatever?’ He answered, ‘Have you not read that the creator from the beginning made them male and female and that he said: This is why a man must leave father and mother, and cling to his wife, and the two become one body? They are no longer two, therefore, but one body. So then, what God has united, man must not divide.’ They said to him, ‘Then why did Moses command that a writ of dismissal should be given in cases of divorce?’ ‘It was because you were so unteachable’ he said ‘that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but it was not like this from the beginning. Now I say this to you: the man who divorces his wife – I am not speaking of fornication – and marries another, is guilty of adultery.’ The disciples said to him, ‘If that is how things are between husband and wife, it is not advisable to marry.’ But he replied, ‘It is not everyone who can accept what I have said, but only those to whom it is granted. There are eunuchs born that way from their mother’s womb, there are eunuchs made so by men and there are eunuchs who have made themselves that way for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.’

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

[dailyaudiobiblechronological]

10/4/2023 DAB Chronological Transcription Part 2

I need you to see me. I need to know what I'm doing is good. I need to know it matters. We need that as human beings, as much as who we don't like to admit it, we need it. And Jesus receives that from above. I just absolutely love that we get glimpses of the humanity of this man. And then finally today, We see the ministry of Jesus starting to spread. And we see in the passage, early in the morning, well before sunrise, Jesus rose and went to a deserted place where he could be alone in prayer. Simon and those with him tracked him down. When they found him, they told him everyone's looking for you. This is after Jesus chose his 12, he replied, Let's head in the other direction to the nearby villages so that I can preach there too. That's why I've come. We have as a society, we have as a a group of people demonstrated that bigger is always better that if you have a ministry, you've got to grow that ministry. Numbers matter. How many were in attendance or how many CD's did you sell? How many books did you sell? Always striving for more, greater, bigger as we're going to learn about Jesus. As it got bigger, and as it grew, he often ducked out. He often left and we see even a little bit further, At the end of the passage from Mark today, after Jesus heals the man with the skin disease. He tells him sternly. Don't say anything to anyone. Instead, go and show yourself to the priest and offer the sacrifice for your cleansing that Moses commanded. The priests were able to deem whether or not the people were healthy or if they were sick. This will be a testimony to them. Instead, he went out and started talking freely and spreading the news so that Jesus wasn't able to enter a town openly. We have watched the children of Israel disobey God, turn their back on God, and now we see this rebellious man getting instructions straight from Jesus and doing the opposite of what Jesus asked him to do. Oh, we are a stubborn people. We are a rebellion. We're a rebellious people if we don't see ourselves here in this reading today, Then we might need to get the wax out of the ears, because this convicts my heart. We so often follow the norms of society bigger, grow it bigger, get more, do more, do more to be more. And hear the words, the instruction from Jesus. Don't say anything to anyone and he defies Jesus himself. The other day I was talking to Ezekiel and he asked me a question in my mind was in a different place. I fully admit I was not present and he kept asking me and, I I woke to the fact after it was all over and said and done with, but because I didn't respond to him, he went ahead and did it. And then I got after him and said, why did you do that? I didn't answer you and he said, well, because you didn't answer me. I just took it as a yes and I wanted to get angry with them, but then I thought Yeah, I've done that plenty of times. Can't hear you. God, I'm It must mean you don't care. It must mean it doesn't matter. And so I can go ahead and do that. And I sternly got after him and said my no response Means you do not move until you hear an answer. And then I heard my own words, and I thought of all the many times that I acted because I didn't hear clearly from God, let alone heard clearly from God, and still did the opposite Of what he said. Whew, OK, lot to pull from today, but this is where we end. 

[venturebroes]

IM AM GOING TO KILL MYSELF HEHAHA THEGSVZM2K EGQ HWYW&#&-&NDHZHZH,H I FUCKNG HATE EVEYRINE EVER

[holylulusworld]

How’s your daddy? (3)

Summary: You are still in the wolf’s clutches…

Pairing: Alpha!Negan x Omega!Reader

Warnings: language, a/b/o, a/b/o dynamics, true mates, age gap (undefined), pregnant omega, possessive Negan, fluff, cuddling & snuggling, nesting, angst,   protective Negan & father, mentions of an armistice, kidnapped reader, violence, blood, character's death, murder

A/N: Y/F/N = your father’s name

<< Catch up here

It’s six months into your pregnancy that you are finally allowed to visit your father outside of Negan’s territory. He and your father agreed on an armistice to make sure your father can see you again.

Now you nervously sit in a car driving you toward your father’s territory. Negan wasn’t allowed to come with you so, he sent his most trusted man, Simon to protect you.

“We will go in. You can see your father and talk to him. Negan gives you two hours. Not a minute longer. We need to drive back before dusk,” you silently nod. Simon is no one to mess with, you got that already. “I need to hear it.”

“I got it, Simon. Negan wants to keep me, and his pup safe,” you run your hand over your swollen belly. “I won’t risk my baby’s life. Omegas are very protective when it comes to their pups.”

“I know you are not stupid, girl. I just needed to make sure it’s important to follow Negan’s rules to keep you and the baby safe. I will protect you at all costs, but we can only keep you safe if you play by the rules.”

You don’t like Simon nor his attitude but for the sake of your child, you will try to not go all angry omega at him.

“How much longer?” you glance out of the window of the car, sighing. The omega in you wants to go back to your nest and curl in Negan’s side. Your father, though, deserves to see you after he agreed to an armistice. “I hope dad is not angry at me.”

“Why would he?” Simon grumbles. He would’ve preferred to go with Negan and rough Rick’s group up a little. “He’s your father and loves you. Your father is one of the few lucky ones still having his family around.”

“We lost mom and my big brother. Grandma too,” you sniffle. “That’s why he’s so overprotective over me. He already lost so much. I know everyone lost people, but dad he just…keeping the people we found save keeps him going.”

“We are almost there,” the driver says. He wants to slow the car down as bullets hit the car. You shriek as Simon pushes you down onto the seat and covers your body with his. “Stay down.”

You don’t know the man’s name, but the driver knows yours. He almost chants it as he prays, he won’t get you killed. Everyone knows Negan would rip him apart if you don’t make it back safely.

“Y/N, you need to stay down, okay,” Simon yells as more gunshots hit the car. “It’s a bulletproof hammer, but you need to duck your head.”

“Look what we got here,” one of your attackers hits the poor driver with his gun, you whimper, as you hear his cheekbone break.

“Let the girl go,” you glance at Simon kneeling next to you, “you’ve got no clue what you just did. You made sure Negan’s wrath will come over you.”

“Oh, we got Negan’s little whore,” the man sneers at Simon’s words. “I bet he’ll do anything to get her back. A pity he won’t get her back.”

“I don’t know who you are,” Simon spits blood onto the ground, eyes never leaving the leader’s face, “but I’m telling you this only once. Let the girl go and Negan won’t flay you alive. Be smart and give up right now.”

“Gentlemen, look at that smartass,” the leader sneers while aiming the gun at the driver’s head. “How about this?” turning your head as the leader shoots the driver you start to cry. The gunshot makes your ears ring, and you fear, that Simon won’t be able to keep you safe.

“That was your second mistake,” you sniffle as Simon doesn’t even flinch when the leader hits him with the gun too. “And that was your third mistake. Negan will find you and kill every soul involved in this nonsense.”

“Ezekiel, maybe it wasn’t the best idea to kidnap Y/F/N’s daughter. We didn’t know she’s Negan’s omega,” one of your attackers says. He doesn’t want to die only as Ezekiel wants to take over your father’s camp and piss Negan off.

“I don’t fucking care about your opinion, Jack,” Ezekiel growls, now aiming the gun at Jack’s head. “We’ve got the chance to take over Y/F/N’s and Negan’s camp. I won’t miss the chance to bring them both down.”

“We’ve got like twenty men and even fewer guns. Negan got an army, and we don’t want to talk about her daddy. Let’s just run and hide before they find out we kidnapped the girl,” another man hastily says. He looks around the area, afraid someone is already lurking in the dark to attack them out of nowhere.

“Get her into the car, and bring that bastard too,” Ezekiel looks down at Simon, smirking darkly. “Maybe he’ll be useful after all. Someone must deliver our message…”

“How could you let this happen, Simon?” Negan is out of it. He spits while talking, eyes glued to Simon kneeling in front of him, awaiting his end.

"Negan, stop blaming your man,” your father holds Negan back. “They killed all of your men. How could one man keep her safe? We need to focus on the man holding my daughter hostage.”

“You mean my pregnant omega,” your alpha growls. He clutches your scarf to his chest, ready to rip anyone touching one hair on your head apart. “Tell me what happened, Simon.”

“It was an easy trip. No walkers around, no enemies. We were almost there when the driver told us to duck our heads. Bullets hit the car and we got lucky that it was a bulletproof car,” Simon will take his punishment like a man. He looks up at Negan to tell them what happened to you. “We didn’t have much of a choice after they got a rocket launcher out. The leader threatened to use it. So…”

“You decided to give up,” Negan huffs. “Coward.”

“Negan, can you shut up for a moment?” your father tuts. “Let the man speak for once. We need to know more to save my honeybun.”

“Again, you mean my omega.”

“I got out first, telling Y/N to stay inside the car. I gave her my gun, hoping they won’t find her,” Simon continues. “Our driver, Jason. He left the car too, a brave man. That bastard shot him in the head, right in front of Y/N.”

“Why did Y/N leave the car too?” your alpha asks. “Simon? Did she do anything stupid?”

“I closed the door behind me and told the leader that only I and Jason were in the car,” Negan’s right-hand man says. “I-they knew Y/N was with us, Negan. They wanted to get hold of Y/F/N’s daughter. The man’s name is Ezekiel.”

“Ezekiel,” Negan nods knowingly. “I heard of that crazy bastard. He calls himself King Ezekiel or called himself so until his kingdom fell. Rumors say he had a tiger too.”

“Ezekiel, I heard that name before. A few of my people got killed lately. One of them made it back, telling me that the group attacking my people said they are doing it for a man called Ezekiel,” your father tiredly runs his hand down his face. “A dangerous man wanting to take over another kingdom, or two.”

“I will take him apart. Piece by piece. If he laid hands on my girl, he’ll die,” Negan grits his teeth. “Now tell us what the bastard wants, Simon.”

“Look at our hostage, already getting comfortable,” you growl at your kidnapper, slapping his hand away as he tries to touch your round belly. “A pregnant omega. We will keep her after this is done. I like me an obedient little thing.”

“If you try to touch me again, I’ll tell Negan what you did. He will split your skull with his bat, but before he does so, he’ll hurt you so bad you’ll cry for your mommy,” Ezekiel grins down at you, but backpaddles as you snarl at him. He can’t hurt you now. Not before he got what he wanted. “You will die slow and painful for killing his men, my driver, and kidnapping his omega.”

Gunshots wake you from your restless slumber on the thin blanket they offered to you to sleep on in the woods. You blink your eyes open, immediately cowering to protect your baby.

“Y/N!” you whimper when you recognize your alpha’s voice. “OMEGA!”

Screams and gunshots pierce through the air, but you only focus on Negan’s voice. “HERE!” you cry while crawling toward a nearby tree. “ALPHA!”

“Doll,” you scent him before you feel his arms wrap around you. While people scream and fight around you, Negan takes his time to look you all over. “I’ve got you. Let me get you out of here, doll.”

Blood, gunpowder, and dirt cover his clothes, face, and hands but you couldn’t care less. You hide your face in his neck to scent your alpha.

“Negan,” your father runs toward you, shooting a man on his way to defend you and your unborn baby. “Simon, Dwight, and my men are close behind. Ezekiel was able to run, though.”

“What about the others?” Negan carefully picks you up in bridal style. “Y/F/N, are the others dead?”

“We captured two, the others are dead,” your father confirms. “We should bring Y/N to your place. It’s closer and she needs a rest.”

“You’re safe, baby doll,” Negan noses his way up and down your neck. “Your alpha is here, and your father too. He and his people will join us here and share their resources with us. I don’t like sharing my position, but we’ve got a new enemy and must work together.”

After he brought you back home, and you fell asleep he had a long and fruitful conversation with your father. They now decided on working together to find Ezekiel. He’s still on the run and Negan can’t wait to keep his hands on him to rip the monster apart.

“Alpha,” you turn around to hide your face in Negan’s chest. “I knew you would come, Negan. I told that asshole so. You will kill that bastard slow, right? He shot the poor driver. I want him dead.”

“All for you, doll. Consider it done…”

Tags in reblog.

[frmartinshomiliesandreflections]

8th August >> Fr. Martin’s Gospel Reflections / Homilies on Matthew 17:22-27 for Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time: ‘The sons are exempt’.

Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

Gospel (USA)

Matthew 17:22-27

They will kill him and he will be raised. The subjects are exempt from the tax.

As Jesus and his disciples were gathering in Galilee, Jesus said to them, “The Son of Man is to be handed over to men, and they will kill him, and he will be raised on the third day.” And they were overwhelmed with grief.

   When they came to Capernaum, the collectors of the temple tax approached Peter and said, “Does not your teacher pay the temple tax?” “Yes,” he said. When he came into the house, before he had time to speak, Jesus asked him, “What is your opinion, Simon? From whom do the kings of the earth take tolls or census tax? From their subjects or from foreigners?” When he said, “From foreigners,” Jesus said to him, “Then the subjects are exempt. But that we may not offend them, go to the sea, drop in a hook, and take the first fish that comes up. Open its mouth and you will find a coin worth twice the temple tax. Give that to them for me and for you.”

Gospel (Except USA)

Matthew 17:22-27

'They will put the Son of Man to death'.

One day when they were together in Galilee, Jesus said to his disciples, ‘The Son of Man is going to be handed over into the power of men; they will put him to death, and on the third day he will be raised to life again.’ And a great sadness came over them.

   When they reached Capernaum, the collectors of the half-shekel came to Peter and said, ‘Does your master not pay the half-shekel?’ ‘Oh yes’ he replied, and went into the house. But before he could speak, Jesus said, ‘Simon, what is your opinion? From whom do the kings of the earth take toll or tribute? From their sons or from foreigners?’ And when he replied, ‘From foreigners’, Jesus said, ‘Well then, the sons are exempt. However, so as not to offend these people, go to the lake and cast a hook; take the first fish that bites, open its mouth and there you will find a shekel; take it and give it to them for me and for you.’

Reflections (8)

(i) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

In today’s first reading, the prophet Ezekiel has a vision of God. He found it very difficult to describe this experience. He uses the phrase, ‘something that looked like’ and ‘what looked like’. It looked like a sapphire, a throne, fire. It looked like all of these elements but it wasn’t any of them. It is very tentative language. Ezekiel is aware that his description doesn’t do justice to what he saw. God is always beyond our words. Human words fail us when it comes to speaking of God. Yet, God has spoken a powerful word to us to help us to see who God is, and that word is Jesus. To see Jesus is to see God. How Jesus relates to us shows us how God relates to us. In today’s gospel reading, Jesus shows great sensitivity in the way he relats to those who put a hostile question to Peter, ‘Does your master not pay the half shekel?’ This was a tax paid to the Temple in Jerusalem for its upkeep. It is clear from the gospel reading that Jesus felt no obligation to pay this tax and, yet, he told Peter to pay it, ‘so as not to offend these people’. Even though Jesus felt totally free in regard to this Temple tax, he paid it because he didn’t want to offend those for whom the tax was very important. There was a great sensitivity there to the feelings of others. Sensitivity to others, to what is important to them, to what they hold dear, is one of the expressions of love. There are different ways of expressing our relationship with God. Some people’s way of relating to God, their way of praying, for example, may not appeal to us, but we are respectful of it and sensitive to their feelings around it. Jesus revealed God’s love, a love that was full of sensitivity for others. Through the Holy Spirit he empowers us to give expression to this sensitive love in our own lives.

And/Or

(ii) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

There are two parts to this morning’s gospel reading. In the first part Jesus announces his coming suffering and death. As a result, we are told, a great sadness came over the disciples. Sadness is the normal response when we are faced with the departure or the death of someone we love. We have all known that kind of sadness, the sadness that engulfs the disciples in today’s gospel reading. To some extent, we live with it all the time. Yet, we cannot allow such sadness to dominate us. We have to keep going in the strength the Lord gives us. In today’s gospel reading, Jesus and the disciples keep travelling on after this moment of harsh reality. Eventually they come to Capernaum, the home of Simon Peter. There, a strange little incident takes place. The half-shekel tax is the tax that every Jew in the time of Jesus paid annually towards the upkeep of the temple. On the one hand Jesus says that he and his followers are exempt from paying this tax, because Jesus himself is now the new temple. On the other hand, Jesus tells Peter to pay the tax so as not to offend the religious leaders. In other words, Jesus declares freedom in this regard but then recommends putting this freedom to one side for the moment so as not to give unnecessary offense. In that way Jesus reminds us that although we may be free in regard to certain matters, sometimes it can be right not to use our freedom when the good of others is at stake.

 And/Or

(iii) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

In the time of Jesus, every Jew, regardless of where they lived, had to pay an annual tax towards the expenses of the temple in Jerusalem. In this morning’s gospel reading, those who collect this tax approach Peter to ask whether or not Jesus intends paying this tax. Peter instinctively answers ‘Yes’. However, when Jesus is alone with his disciples, he puts a little parable to Peter which suggests that Jesus and his followers are not obliged to pay this tax. They are sons (and daughters) of God the Father in heaven and, sons, unlike slaves, are free. Jesus has a very different view about the payment of this Temple tax to those who collect the tax. Yet, even though in theory Jesus and his disciples should consider themselves free from the obligation of paying this tax, Jesus instructs Peter to go and pay this tax for both of them, so as to avoid giving unnecessary scandal or offence to others. This issue is not our issue but Jesus’ way of coming at it has still something to say to us today. Jesus implies that just because we are free to do something does not mean that it is right to do it. Freedom is a very important value, but the gospels suggest that the exercise of freedom has to be governed by higher values, such as the value of loving the other, being considerate of the other, avoiding giving unnecessary offence or scandal to the other. Jesus teaches us that sometimes we have to renounce our legitimate freedom when the well being of others is at stake. In the world of God’s kingdom proclaimed by Jesus the question, ‘What is my entitlement?’ becomes less important than the question, ‘How can I best serve others, including those who see things differently to me?’

 And/Or

(iv) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

The gospel this morning centres on the payment of the half shekel tax. This was an annual tax that all Jews paid for the upkeep of the Temple in Jerusalem. The question is whether Jesus and his disciples were free from having to pay this tax. After all, Jesus had declared that ‘something greater than the Temple is here’. The ‘something greater’ was Jesus himself. He is the new Temple of God, the one in whom God is present. He is Immanuel, God-with-us. If he is the new Temple, then strictly speaking the tax to the old Temple in Jerusalem does not need to be paid. That is what Jesus means when he says, ‘the sons are exempt’, the sons being the sons of God’s kingdom, Jesus’ disciples. However, even though in theory Jesus and his disciples are free from having to pay the tax, Jesus declares that they should pay the tax so as to not to offend the Jewish tax collectors, so as to avoid giving scandal. The issue of the Temple tax is not our issue today, but the way Jesus deals with it can continue to speak to us. Jesus is declaring that just because we are legitimately free not to do something does not mean that we should not do it. Similarly, just because we are legitimately free to do something does not mean that we should do it. Freedom is not always the most important value for Jesus. The value of love is always more important in his eyes. Whatever promotes the well being of others always guides how we exercise our legitimate freedom. One expression of the love of others is not giving unnecessary offense or scandal.

 And/Or

(v) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

In the time and place of Jesus, people laboured under the burden of taxation. Perhaps that much has not changed! There were various taxes to be paid to the Roman authorities. There was also an annual half-shekel tax to be paid for the upkeep of the Temple in Jerusalem. In this morning’s gospel reading, those who were responsible for collecting this Temple tax were curious to know whether or not Jesus paid it. Peter assures them that he did. However, when Jesus had the opportunity to speak with Peter, he conveyed to him, in the words of the gospel reading, that ‘the sons are exempt’ from this tax. The ‘sons’ were the members of the new family that Jesus was gathering about himself. Yet, even though, Jesus no longer saw the Temple tax as obligatory for himself or his disciples, he instructs Peter to go and pay it, ‘so as not to offend these people’. Although Jesus was not afraid to offend people when something of consequence was at stake, he didn’t go out of his way to offend people when the issue was not so important, as in this instance of the Temple tax. There were issues on which he took a stand and other issues which he let go. We all have to learn to make that distinction. When are we called to stand and fight and when can we just let things be? We look to the Holy Spirit to give us the wisdom to make that judgement.

And/Or

 (vi) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

Today’s gospel reading makes reference to the half-shekel tax. This was not a tax imposed by the Romans. Rather, it was a Jewish tax. Devout Jews paid the half-shekel tax to the Temple in Jerusalem every year to defray the costs of the sacrifices that were offered in the Temple. Peter is asked by the collectors of this tax whether his master, Jesus, paid it or not. They were testing Jesus’ credentials as a devout and orthodox Jew. Peter did not hesitate to say that Jesus did pay this annual tax. In the conversation that Jesus subsequently has with Peter, Jesus suggests that neither himself nor his disciples are bound to pay this tax. This seems to be the meaning of his statement, ‘the sons are exempt’. Jesus, of course, was the supreme Son of God, but his disciples were called to share in his relationship with God as Son and to that extent were sons and daughters of God. Even though ‘the sons are exempt’, Jesus instructs Peter to pay the tax for both of them, so as not to give an offence to the collectors of the half-shekel tax. Jesus suggests that just because we are free in relation to some matter does not mean it is always a good thing to exercise that freedom. Jesus implies that freedom is an important value but it is not an absolute value. There are other values which take precedence over the value of freedom, such as consideration for the sensitivities of others, or what we would call the value of self-emptying love of others. For Jesus and for the Christian tradition that flows from him, love, the primary fruit of the Holy Spirit, is a higher value than freedom. Such love of the other shapes how we give expression to our freedom. As Saint Paul puts it so succinctly, ‘where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom’.

 And/Or

(vii) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

Taxation has always been a contentious issue from ancient times until today. How much tax should we pay? Who should pay tax? In the time and place of Jesus, there were taxes due to Rome and there was also a religious tax due to the Temple in Jerusalem, the half-shekel tax. It is this religious tax that is the issue in today’s gospel reading. Jews paid this half-shekel tax to the Temple every year to defray the cost of the sacrifices that were offered there. Those who collected this tax come to Peter and ask him if Jesus pays it or not. They wanted to know whether Jesus behaved as a good Jew should in this matter. Peter answers ‘yes’, assuming that Jesus would fulfil this requirement of the Jewish Law. However, Jesus goes on to show that the situation is not quite as simple as Peter’s answer suggests. Jesus’ comment to Peter, ‘the sons are exempt’, suggests that the sons and daughters of God, those who call God ‘Abba’, Father, as Jesus does, are, in fact, exempt from this tax. After all, as Jesus says elsewhere in this gospel of Matthew, with reference to himself, something greater than the Temple is here. The Temple has lost its significance as the privileged place of God’s presence now that Jesus, who is Emmanuel, God-with-us, has arrived to proclaim the powerful presence of God’s reign. Yet, Jesus goes on to declare that, even though, in theory, he and his disciples are free from this Temple tax, Peter should pay the half shekel tax on their behalf. Jesus implies that being free in regard to something does not mean that it is always good to exercise our freedom. Sometimes, other values take precedence over the value of freedom. In this case, what was of greater value was sensitivity towards the collectors of the tax by not offending them, or giving unnecessary scandal. For Jesus, consideration for others, love of others, takes priority over the exercise of legitimate freedom. Within the Christian tradition, freedom is always shaped by love of others, that self-emptying love that places the good of the other before our own, the kind of love that Jesus revealed in his life and his death.

And/Or

 (viii) Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

The story in today’s gospel reading about the half-shekel has been described as one of the more curious stories in the gospels. The half-shekel was a tax that every Jew paid for the upkeep of the Temple in Jerusalem. The collectors of this half-shekel tax came to Peter to know whether Jesus paid this tax or not. In other words, was Jesus a good Jew? Did he support the Temple like every committed Jew? In the conversation Jesus subsequently had with Peter about this tax, Jesus says, ‘the sons are exempt’. Jesus was in the process of forming a new family of disciples, who would be his brothers and sisters, and, thereby, sons and daughters of God. We all belong to that family. On the principle that fathers do not tax their children, Jesus concludes that the members of his new family do not have to pay a tax to God, their Father. However, even though in principal Jesus’ disciples are free from this tax, they should pay it, so as not to give unnecessary scandal to those for whom it is important. Jesus is talking here about a deeper freedom, the freedom to renounce one’s legitimate freedom out of love for others. This is what Saint Paul would call the freedom of the Spirit. It is the freedom to love, even if that entails renouncing our legitimate freedom. For Jesus and Paul, loving consideration for others is a higher value that freedom. For us as followers of Jesus it is love that shapes how we exercise our freedom. The fundamental question for us as Jesus’ disciples is not so much ‘What am I free to do or not do?’ but ‘How can I serve the other in love, especially the most vulnerable?’ When we live out of that question, then we reflect something of God who, according to our first reading, ‘sees justice done for the orphan and widow’ and ‘who loves the stranger’.

Fr. Martin Hogan.

[thefreakydeaky]

Call Out My Name

Part Six Title: A Lonely Night

Characters: Negan, Reader, The Saviors,The Wives

Summary: You belonged to him.Try as you might to pretend indifference, Negan’s very presence has awakened feelings in you that you believed had died with the old world.Is the ruthless King of the Sanctuary still human enough to fall in love?

Warnings: Language, Canon Typical Negan BS, Diet Dr.Angst

Word Count: 2,145

“Can I trust you, Y/n?” He asked as you lay together after.

“Yes, you can.”

“I don’t know how to say it...”

Your eyebrows rose.

“You? At a loss for words? I don’t believe it.”

Negan chuckled dryly.

“I don’t know how to say it nicely.”He amended, his tongue poked out to wet his lip as he tried to find the right words.

“Do you remember what I said to you about my position as a leader?”

You shook your head ‘no’.

“It’s precarious.I work damn hard to make sure my people are taken care of and to make sure that everyone knows not to fuck with me.As I’m sure you have realized, I like to be on top.”

“Mhmm..”

“Sometimes that means I have to bash in a few heads. Sometimes it means I have to take a new wife, but I’d say I have everything I could want within reason. Wouldn’t you?”

You nodded in agreement.

“So imagine my surprise, when I go out to do some head bashing and find that despite all i have there is one thing I not only want, but need...You.” His expression softened as he gazed into your eyes. “The moment I saw you, I recognized you as my other self. That’s why I did it. That’s why I called you my wife without asking.We were made for each other. I can’t explain how I know, I just know, Y/n.”

You blinked back tears, overwhelmed by the unmistakeable ring of truth his confession held. You looked back up to find him watching your face wearily.

“How can I be sure you won’t think how I feel about you is a weakness?”

You laced your fingers with his.

“You aren’t weak.Neither am I.We have both put survival above everything else.”

He winced.

“Hell, that isn’t reassuring in the least.”

You smiled apologetically.

“What I’m getting at is, if you’re open to it, we could try putting each other first and survival second.You know, the way relationships were pre-walker?”

“And what would you know about that, hmm?”

“I was in a relationship back when.”

“What, some high school sweetheart bullshit?” He sighed, incredulity in his voice.

“No.” You turned onto your belly. “I was in a serious relationship with an older man.”

“Were you now?”

“I was.”

“What was he like?” Negan pressed a kiss to your shoulder.

“Do you really wanna know?”

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t.”

You smirked at the envy in his eyes.

“He was...fifteen or so years older than me.”

“Mhmm.”

You carded your fingers through Negan’s hair.

“He had pretty blue eyes and a very nice smile.”

“What did he do?”

“He was a policeman.”

“A cop? You were dating a cop?” His brow furrowed.

“Is that surprising?” You grinned.

“It is.” He grumbled. “Did you love ‘um.”

“It was complicated, but I did love him. Then we broke up, the world changed for the worse,and I had bigger things to worry about than him.”

Negan mulled on that for a moment.

"I ever tell you I was married before the world went to shit?"

Try as he might to hide behind a veneer of nonchalance, you sensed some dark emotions beneath the act.

"Not very successfully, but she meant a great deal to me."

You nodded.

"I was shit at showing it, but I'm sure you know a thing or two about that."He grimaced.

Negan looked into your eyes. In the depths of his gaze you could see a sorrow so intense, it made your heart ache with compassion.

“Do you think we could make it if we tried?” He asked too casually.

“Yes, I reckon we could.” You kissed the back of his hand.

You felt so filled with warmth you could burst.

Negan kissed the corner of your mouth lovingly.

“You have my whole heart, Y/n.”

He took you into his arms.

"Until my last breath."

Feeling safer than you had in years, you snuggled into his embrace and reveled in the wonder of being loved.

Staring out of the window did nothing to improve his mood.Lighting flashed in a black as midnight sky at eleven o'clock in the morning.

"What's the plan?"Negan asked the room at large, taking a seat at the head of the table.

His lieutenants sat in a make shift conference room, looking worse for the wear from the battle with Alexandria.

Dwight tapped the back end of a switch blade on the table, seemingly deep in thought.Regina sat arms crossed over her chest glaring at Dwight's hands.The minutes ticked by quietly. Negan's already strained patience was growing thin.Gavin tilted his chair back and sighed.

“There's nothing left for us to do, 'cept kill them all."Simon concluded.

“Dwight?" Negan posed wearily.

"We don't need to kill all them people to get them in line.We just have to kill the right ones."

Negan narrowed his eyes at him.

"The right people, meaning who? Rick Grimes?"

“Grimes, The Widow, and The Ki- “ Dwight grimaced. “Ezekiel.” He amended apologetically.

“Hmm..." Their leader scratched at his chin, in contemplation.

"We'll put 'em on a platform, make it bloody, make sure they all see it happen." Dwight's gruff voice provided.

"I like the way you think, Dwight." Negan responded at last."Si, how long you need to get this set up?"

A blood thirsty grin broke out on Simon's face.

"We'll be ready by morning." He replied.

To the Saviors Simon directed a gung-ho,“Let's go to work."

Mean while, back at the doll house, boredom and gloom drove the wives to the parlor.

"We could play a game?"Tanya suggested.

Amber emitted a petulant huff in response and continued flipping through a beat up issue of Vogue

"We can play a drinking game."Sherri suggested.

“A drinking game?"You repeated uncertainly.

"We are all adults here, we're stuck 'till Negan says otherwise."Tanya pointed out.

"We might as well."Amber intoned, tossing her magazine aside.

You glanced uncertainly at Sherri.For a moment you considered declining, but much to their surprise, you agreed.

"Okay, What are we playing?"

Frankie sat up in her chair, with sudden interest.

“Never have I ever!”Sherri and Tanya said in unison.

You swallowed in an attempt to soothe your suddenly dry throat.This was a disaster waiting to happen.

Amber took it upon herself to serve each person in the room a generous shot of vodka.

“The way it works is, we take turns asking a question.Well sort of a question sort a not.”Sherri hedged.

“If it’s my turn I’d say something like, Never have I ever...smoked a joint.”

“Bullshit.”Frankie laughed.

“If you have smoked a joint you do a shot.If you haven't, you don’t.It’s fun.Trust me.” Sherri’s enthusiastic grin was a little scary.

You had never seen her smile before today.You eyed her skeptically, but didn’t back out.

“Why don’t we go from youngest to oldest?”You suggested.

Amber went around the room handing out the generous glasses she had poured to each of you.

“Go on then.”Sherri encouraged Frankie.

“Alright, never have I ever...given a blowjob.”

“Ha! That’s a cheat! We all know He loves getting head.”Tanya chuckled.

“Is not!”

You all took a shot.

Amber went around the room refilling the glasses.

As the game went on, you slowly began to relax.The questions were invasive at times, but no one had caused any trouble so far.

“Never have I ever”Tanya began, “been tied up during sex.”

“Ugh Tanya!”Amber exclaimed in disgust.

Sherri’s eyes were fixed on you.

She is so damn nosey. You frowned, but you were a good sport and drank just the same. To your surprise, so did Frankie.

You shared a knowing look then burst out laughing.Sherri was not amused.

“Never have I ever been to Texas?”Amber tried.

You shook your head.

“Never have I ever kissed another girl.”You threw out eyeing each of them in turn.

Frankie, Tanya, and You all took another shot.

“Really, Y/n?”Amber’s eyes went wide with curiosity.

“Oh, come on don’t act so shocked.It’s the freakin" apocalypse.”Frankie scoffed.

“Alright alright, never have I ever been eaten out by Negan.” Sherri said smoothly.

You cringed at the obvious ploy.

Tanya,Sherri, and Frankie each took a shot.

You could feel them all scrutinizing you.You and Amber were the odd ones out. You refused to rise to the bait.What happened between you and Negan was none of their business.

“Amber” Sherri prompted when she remained quiet for too long.

“Oh, uh, yes. Never have I ever..” She wracked her brain trying to come up with something, but came up empty. “Never have I ever had a three some??”

“Booooo!” a sloppy drunk Frankie complained.”We already asked that one.”

“Right right...”

“How about never have I eveeer, had a sexual fantasy about a Savior.” Frankie suggested.

Tanya blushed fiercely and took the shot.

The look on Amber’s face was bleak.

“Never have I ever been to Canada.”Sherri said quickly changing the subject.

No one drank.You felt bad for Amber.You had forgotten that some of these girls used to be in relationships with the men that were now Saviors.

Tanya smirked at you.

“Never have I ever, had sex with Negan in the middle of the day.”She said much too chipper for your liking.

“Just Negan?”

“Yes.”

You knew what she meant to find out, but you refused to go there with her. You didn’t take the shot.

Her brown eyes blazed into yours.She and Sherri drank simultaneously.

“Never have I ever lied to my husband.”You deadpanned to remind them that you were in this together.

Every one of them drank.

“Never have I ever had a sex related injury.”

Sherri stared at Tanya when she didn't drink.

“Taanyaa”

“Sherriii” Tanya mocked good naturedly.

“You have.”She insisted.

Tanya winced and took the shot. Embarrassed and hoping no one would ask the million dollar question.

“Okay, but how??”Frankie asked.

Tanya covered her blushing face in her hands.

“Damn it Sherri.”

“She was with Simon on a free pass day.”

Frankie rolled her eyes.”You know how that goes”

Sherri raised an eyebrow. “Not all of us do.”

"He gets a little...gymnastic." Tanya admitted, blushing.

“Never have I ever wanted to fuck Simon.” Amber singsonged.

“It’s not even your turn!” Tanya winced and took the shot.

You were feeling so warm and buzzing hard.You unthinkingly took the shot along with Tanya and Frankie.

“Simon?” Sherri’s voice was filled with judgement.

“Surprised?”

“Not even a little.” She sniffed.

“Anyone ever tell you, you’re awful judgmental for a woman in a polygamist marriage?” You snarked.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.You act pretty high and mighty for someone who sucks the same cock the rest of us do.”

“I’m not like you.” She hissed venomously.”I didn’t fucking choose this!”

“And you think I did?”Amber stood, swaying drunkly.

“Not you.” Sherri’s voice lost it’s venom. “But the rest of you did.”

“You’re so wrong for thinkin’ that and even worse for sayin’ it!” Tanya’s eyes filled with tears.

“Sherri, You’ve been talking down to me ever since I got here.” You spoke louder than you intended to.

“Yeah? And what are you going to do about it?”

“I’m not the one with the problem.”

“You sure as shit act like it.”

You threw your glass in her general direction. It pelted her in the shoulder and rolled onto the floor.

“Bitch if you’re feelin’ froggy go ahead and fuckin’ jump.”

The double doors burst wide open.

“What in the hell is going on in here?” Negan thundered looking around the room with an irritated scowl.

No one moved.Sherri’s fury was still apparent in her expression.You wondered how long he’d been listening.

“Explain.Now.” He demanded picking on Tanya who hadn’t said a thing.

“W-well...We were drinking and playing some stupid game. About sex.”Her eyes darted between you and Sherri.

“A sex game?” Negan repeated, disbelief in his tone.

“Yupp. Not a one of us’s been to Canada and Y/n kissed a girl, Now Sherri thinks we’re all a buncha sluts.” Amber hiccuped.

Negan took a steadying breath and stared down each of you in turn.

“Well I’ll be damned." He scrutinized Amber's slight swaying figure and shook his head. "Sweetheart, you are trashed!I’m cuttin’ you off.”

Negan took the bottle of vodka from her. From the look on her face, she had forgotten she was holding it.

“I’ll get you some water.” Frankie nodded decisively and tried to shake off her buzz.

She swayed a little on her way to the sink.

“So what I’m gettin’ here is, you all got wasted and started swapping stories about sex with me?”

You didn’t know what to say.You were, despite Sherri being an asshat, feeling pretty good right about now.

“You are around each other all day every freakin’ day and the subject has never come up before?” He asked with feigned interest.”I don’t know if I should take that as an insult or a compliment.”

Finally got a taste of his own medicine.

You snickered.

“What’s so funny over there,Y/n?”

Uh-oh no pet names.Daddy is maaad.

The ridiculous thought made you chuckle and soon you were emitting peels of laughter so infectious that Tanya started laughing too.

“You cut that shit out!It is not fucking funny.” He shifted his weight, brought lucille onto his shoulder, then licked his lips. “I don’t like drama.”

Sherri rolled her eyes.

“Coulda fooled me.” Amber jibed under her breath.

You mashed your lips together to hold back your smile.

“What did you just say?”

Amber shook her head.

You batted your lashes at him.

His nostrils flared like he could smell the insubordination.

“Wow I am havin’ a damn hard time rememberin’ why I thought keeping so many women around was a good idea.”

“Cause you expected a nonstop orgy?” You suggested. “Ya reap what ya sew, Babe.”

“What the ever loving fuck?” A pained look crossed his face.

“I mean,” Your languid gaze swept the room. “It isn’t right, but I get it.” You shrugged.

“That’s enough. I don’t have the patience to deal with all of you at once.Every one of you to your bedrooms! I don’t want to hear one peep out of you for the rest of the day.”

“Sure thing, Daddy.” The corners of your lips quirked into an almost grin as you stood and headed for your room.

“Smart ass.” He grumbled following behind you.

[please-help-this-little-lesbian]

Shut up Lance

PRINCESS AND MERCER FUCKED???

Ooh Connie’s gonna rat

SCREAMING CRYING SHAKING THROWING UP

JUDITH AND RJ AT SCHOOL

THE PROPOGANDA POSTERS

AHHHH

So does the CW just have one school building and it’s k-12?

Lance is like Simon but more controlled. Like he 1000% gives me Tucker Carlson vibes. Like this man is a REPUBLICAN. His family knows the Reagan’s

Omg alcoholic Tommy

FUCK THE CW AND ITS MEDICAL DEBT

Wait who what

“The young psychopath” lmao

OKAY THE CW USES REAL MONEY FINALLY WE HAVE ANSWERS

ITS TGE SCENE

TELL HIM MAGGIE

I hate Daryl like this ngl

SHIT

MAGGIE DIDNT DO IT FUCK OFF

Wait but she’s definitely hiding something

Carol what is you doin??

WHAT IS THIS EZEKIEL WHAT ARE YOU DOING

I love Princess and Mercer so much

SCREAMING SOBBING SHAKING THROWING UP

LANCE LEAVE HIM ALONE

YOU LITTLE ASSHOLE

ELIJAH SURPREMACY

OMG DARYL

THE FBOMB

ADBDDHDD

Carol and Ezekiel are so cute

Max’s outfit is so cute

Leah…?

Oh shit girl run

QUEEN

[aibidil]

Aib recs: published fiction I read this year

LGBTQ but not romance, i.e. don’t expect a romance story arc:

-Paul Takes the Form of a Mortal Girl by Andrea Lawlor. It’s 1993. Paul is a queer college dropout SHAPESHIFTER who can change his body from male to female at will. This book is super well written, hilarious, outrageously insightful on gender.

-The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. Achilles and Patrocles. My heart. MY HEART. STAY IN THE CAVE! So good. 

-Luck in the Shadows / Stalking Darkness by Lynn Flewelling. This is an older fantasy series where the two main characters eventually get together but MOSTLY they just romp around being badasses and doing crime AND (I swear to god I would not lie to you) Seregil is Sirius Black to the point where I really wonder if JKR read these books before writing Sirius. At one point he’s described as “a sensualist and a fop.”

Literaryish but actually good:

-The Immortalists by Chloe Benjamin. Four siblings find out as kids the supposed dates of their deaths. Do they believe the date or not? Does the date only have power because they think it does? Told in four parts, one each per sibling. My heart belongs to Simon, who runs away as a gay teen to SF in the 1980s, and Klara, who performs illusions, but in the end I became completely captivated by all four sibs. 

-Kindred by Octavia Butler. A black woman without warning starts getting transported back in time to a slave plantation. If her white husband is touching her when it happens, he goes too—and has to pretend to be her owner. THIS BOOK IS Sskldfjslkjfhslkfjhsfksjh so good.

-The Dispossessed by Ursula Le Guin. A brilliant (bisexual) physicist from an anarchist-communist planet travels to a capitalist planet to work on his theory and pave the way for change. This is not fast reading, it is Big Ideas reading, but I loved how intensely human it is even as it shows the way these political systems affect people’s lives.

-Circe by Madeline Miller. THIS BOOK oh my goodness, I honestly didn’t know how she was going to manage to make this have an actual novel-like story arc but she did and it is a story of Circe learning how to be who she is and learning how to have an independent way and about relationships and what it means to be human and and and 

Fantasy/Sci-fi series: quirky crews and sassy knife girls:

-Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo. Obviously I was late on this one, but if you are also late please do not miss the gang of kids doing crime with heart FEATURING possibly my fave ship I read this year? Wylan/Jesper AND Nina Zenik, absolute bamf witch whom I love so dearly and knife girl Inej

-Shades of Magic by VE Schwab. There are parallel Londons existing side-by-side. Kell, orphan but adopted by the royal family, is one of the only magicians who can travel between them. He saves the world with a sassy knife girl, his gregarious brother the prince, and a bisexual pirate who wears a sapphire in his eyebrow, against a background of richly imagined magic.

-LIFEL1K3 by Jay Kristoff. A post-apoc Mad-Max-esque dystopia that really took me by surprise how much I liked it. The crew in this one is a mix of humans, robot slaves, and androids: a bestie named Lemon Fresh (not a sassy knife girl exactly, but a sassy electric baseball bat girl), a cyborg dog that was definitely my favorite pet character of the year, an outlawed lifelike android named Ezekiel, and a mysterious yet loving grandpa. Outrageous plot twist. I really need to read the second in this series.

[ttvrtledeerr]

describing my oc’s in 5 words or less

autumn’s leaf - schizophobic af

bella - cr0nch cr0nch

babyface - mute hoe

briarleaf - *https://youtu.be/qt2Ht_Tl9Ic*

cecil - closeted gay soldier 1

charlie - wow imagine showing emotions

clover - ✌🤠

clovertail - stepbro wyd with that gun

con - stepbro with the gun

downcast - hooray for abandoning our kids

ellie - albinism 

ezekiel - gay demon

finley - oops my kids died

ginny - mom

heinrich - dad of the year

herstel - clown bear

julian - blind hoe

karkeo - sassy bitch

kestrel - oh hi satan hru

leemit - sister of the year

lola - precious steampunk bb

masseren - probably the most normal one

oliver - protective younger brother

pike - precious british bb

pirate - neigh

pogo - *cymbal monkey sounds*

praise - badass

quin - greedy homophobe (i hate her)

remy - goth bitch 1

ricky - cat bb

ryann - abusive fucker (i hate him)

scavenger - killed his daughter

simon - closeted gay soldier 2 

spring’s flower - kinda basic but nice

squirrel - *gets abandoned cutely*

urlen - ???

verdrehte - transphobic slut (i hate her)

viktor - ftm german bb 

vito - demon cat bb

wendy - goth bitch 2

winter’s howl - god but not rlly

[roman-catholic-mass-readings]

8th August >> Mass Readings (Except USA)

Saint Dominic, Priest

    on 

Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time.

Monday, Nineteenth Week in Ordinary Time

(Liturgical Colour: White)

(Readings for the feria (Monday))

(There is a choice today between the readings for the ferial day (Monday) and those for the memorial. The ferial readings are recommended unless pastoral reasons suggest otherwise)

First Reading

Ezekiel 1:2-5,24-28

Ezekiel's vision of the glory of the Lord.

On the fifth of the month – it was the fifth year of exile for King Jehoiachin – the word of the Lord was addressed to the priest Ezekiel son of Buzi, in the land of the Chaldaeans, on the bank of the river Chebar.

   There the hand of the Lord came on me. I looked; a stormy wind blew from the north, a great cloud with light around it, a fire from which flashes of lightning darted, and in the centre a sheen like bronze at the heart of the fire. In the centre I saw what seemed four animals. They looked like this. They were of human form. I heard the noise of their wings as they moved; it sounded like rushing water, like the voice of Shaddai, a noise like a storm, like the noise of a camp; when they halted, they folded their wings, and there was a noise.

   Above the vault over their heads was something that looked like a sapphire; it was shaped like a throne and high up on this throne was a being that looked like a man. I saw him shine like bronze, and close to and all around him from what seemed his loins upwards was what looked like fire; and from what seemed his loins downwards I saw what looked like fire, and a light all round like a bow in the clouds on rainy days; that is how the surrounding light appeared. It was something that looked like the glory of the Lord. I looked, and prostrated myself.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm

Psalm 148:1-2,11-14

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

Praise the Lord from the heavens,    praise him in the heights. Praise him, all his angels,    praise him, all his host.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

All earth’s kings and peoples,    earth’s princes and rulers, young men and maidens,    old men together with children.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

Let them praise the name of the Lord    for he alone is exalted. The splendour of his name    reaches beyond heaven and earth.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

He exalts the strength of his people.    He is the praise of all his saints, of the sons of Israel,    of the people to whom he comes close.

R/ Your glory fills all heaven and earth. or R/ Alleluia!

Gospel Acclamation

Psalm 147:12,15

Alleluia, alleluia! O praise the Lord, Jerusalem! He sends out his word to the earth. Alleluia!

Or:

cf. 2 Thessalonians 2:14

Alleluia, alleluia! Through the Good News God called us to share the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. Alleluia!

Gospel

Matthew 17:22-27

'They will put the Son of Man to death'.

One day when they were together in Galilee, Jesus said to his disciples, ‘The Son of Man is going to be handed over into the power of men; they will put him to death, and on the third day he will be raised to life again.’ And a great sadness came over them.

   When they reached Capernaum, the collectors of the half-shekel came to Peter and said, ‘Does your master not pay the half-shekel?’ ‘Oh yes’ he replied, and went into the house. But before he could speak, Jesus said, ‘Simon, what is your opinion? From whom do the kings of the earth take toll or tribute? From their sons or from foreigners?’ And when he replied, ‘From foreigners’, Jesus said, ‘Well then, the sons are exempt. However, so as not to offend these people, go to the lake and cast a hook; take the first fish that bites, open its mouth and there you will find a shekel; take it and give it to them for me and for you.’

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

----------------------------------------

Saint Dominic, Priest

(Liturgical Colour: White)

(Readings for the memorial)

(There is a choice today between the readings for the ferial day (Monday) and those for the memorial. The ferial readings are recommended unless pastoral reasons suggest otherwise)

First Reading

1 Corinthians 2:1-10

The wisdom that God predestined to be for our glory.

Brothers, when I came to you, it was not with any show of oratory or philosophy, but simply to tell you what God had guaranteed. During my stay with you, the only knowledge I claimed to have was about Jesus, and only about him as the crucified Christ. Far from relying on any power of my own, I came among you in great ‘fear and trembling’ and in my speeches and the sermons that I gave, there were none of the arguments that belong to philosophy; only a demonstration of the power of the Spirit. And I did this so that your faith should not depend on human philosophy but on the power of God.

   But still we have a wisdom to offer those who have reached maturity: not a philosophy of our age, it is true, still less of the masters of our age, which are coming to their end. The hidden wisdom of God which we teach in our mysteries is the wisdom that God predestined to be for our glory before the ages began. It is a wisdom that none of the masters of this age have ever known, or they would not have crucified the Lord of Glory; we teach what scripture calls: the things that no eye has seen and no ear has heard, things beyond the mind of man, all that God has prepared for those who love him.

   These are the very things that God has revealed to us through the Spirit.

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm

Psalm 95(96):1-3,7-8,10

R/ Proclaim the wonders of the Lord among all the peoples.

O sing a new song to the Lord,    sing to the Lord all the earth.    O sing to the Lord, bless his name.

R/ Proclaim the wonders of the Lord among all the peoples.

Proclaim his help day by day,    tell among the nations his glory    and his wonders among all the peoples.

R/ Proclaim the wonders of the Lord among all the peoples.

Give the Lord, you families of peoples,    give the Lord glory and power;    give the Lord the glory of his name.

R/ Proclaim the wonders of the Lord among all the peoples.

Proclaim to the nations: ‘God is king.’    The world he made firm in its place;    he will judge the peoples in fairness.

R/ Proclaim the wonders of the Lord among all the peoples.

Gospel Acclamation

John 8:12

Alleluia, alleluia! I am the light of the world, says the Lord; anyone who follows me will have the light of life. Alleluia!

Gospel

Luke 9:57-62

'I will follow you wherever you go'.

As Jesus and his disciples travelled along they met a man on the road who said to him, ‘I will follow you wherever you go.’ Jesus answered, ‘Foxes have holes and the birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head.’

   Another to whom he said, ‘Follow me’, replied, ‘Let me go and bury my father first.’ But he answered, ‘Leave the dead to bury their dead; your duty is to go and spread the news of the kingdom of God.’

   Another said, ‘I will follow you, sir, but first let me go and say goodbye to my people at home.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Once the hand is laid on the plough, no one who looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.’

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

[dailyaudiobiblechronological]

8/29/2023 DAB Chronological Transcription

Ezekiel 9 - 12

Welcome to Daily Audio Bible Chronological, I'm China. Today is the 29th day of August. So great to be here with you today. Today we are continuing in the book of Ezekiel. We are in chapters 9 through 12, and we continue on this week with the English Standard Version.

Commentary

Man, if if nothing else, God is a God of His word. And we see that time and time again we see that is true. And we also see God is a God who desires to give his children mercy. Are something that we read maybe a month ago now is that the Lord is waiting to show us grace and mercy and that has like really stayed with me. Because not many of us are waiting to show grace and mercy. If anything were like, oh man, I don't even know grace or mercy was a choice, then I all I was consumed with was anger or revenge or Vengeance or anything of that category. But the Lord is waiting to show us grace and mercy, and that really changes our hearts to be a people, I pray that it changes our hearts to be a people who are waiting to show grace and mercy to the next person. Whether it's someone who will then you know will be in a new cycle of, Hey, I'm, I'm going to show you grace and mercy. Oh, man, thank you. You know what? Next time, next time you mess up, I'll. I'll be sure to return that. And then, like, there's that cycle of it. But Again, we read the stories of the Bible and We we can see themes, we can see patterns, and we can also see the heart of God. And he's a God of his word. He's a God who says when he said who, who means what he says. And he's also a God who is waiting to give his people.He's a God of second chances, and thank God for that.

Prayer

So Father, I thank you for your word, and I thank you that you Are a God who cares for his people. You are a God who loves us. And Lord, I pray that we would be people who are Grateful for your grace and your mercy, and that we would also be willing to Be waiting and eager to extend that to others. And God, I just thank you for your word that shows us your character, shows us your nature, and that we build our relationship with you off of this. This increases our faith. This increases what we know to be true about you. And I thank you that this is the good news that you are for us and that you love us and your heart is always good Towards us and then send your name we pray, Amen.

Announcements

Dailyaudiobible.com is our website, the place of connections where you can see what is going on here in the community, so be sure to check that out. That is all for today. I'm China. I love you, and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow. 

Community Prayer Line

Hi. This is Pure Heart from Tennessee. And I wanted to pray for a few of the DABCers. First Simone from Texas about that guy in her life that she knows not God's best 4 Of. Couple of scriptures that come to mind with. So Keep your heart with all diligence while out of its springs. The Issues of life  And then another one was no temptation is overtaking you. That is not common to man. But God is faithful and he will not let you be tempted beyond what you are able to stand. But with the temptation he will also provide a way of escape that you may endure. So, Lord God, I just asked you then when she's tempted to Um, Go back to this guy, that she know that's not your best, that you will make a way of escape. That she would run Father God and run to you who loves her unconditionally. And then I like to pray for Diane, for her eyes. And I thank you, Lord God, that you're the great physician and I pray that Scales will fall out for as Like they did with Saul before he became Paul. Lord God that you are the restore of all things. You make all things new. So, Lord God, I just thank you that you're touching Oh, Diane's eyes right now, and she will not lose her sight. And then I like to pray for LOV. Lord Lord God, I just thank you that you're Jehovah Gyra, and that you supply all of your needs according to your riches and glory by Christ Jesus. And I thank you, Lord God, that she's standing under an open heaven, that you would pour out blessings that she won't have room enough to receive, and then she'll even have more. 

Hey y'all, hey, it's someone from Texas, and this is for Heather from Santa Barbara. Sweet girl. The word says that for we overcome by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony 15 years ago and a bedroom next to next to my children, I attempted to take my own life. Woke up in a hospital and was later sent to a mental institution. This was my third stay. Yes, and I was diagnosed with every major depressive disorder known to man. I got home, saw the look on my children's face faces, and promised God that I would never, ever. Try to take my life again. Got serious about my relationship with God. Began to wash my work, my mind with the word and I remember walking into my kitchen, jumping 6 bottles of medication into the trash and saying to God, you keep telling me in my spirit that there's nothing wrong with me so.Either one, you're a liar or two, you're gonna heal me or I'll end up in a mental institution, told my psychiatrist. It was great seeing you, knowing you, but I'll never see you again. And he said to me, I'll see you in the mental institution after you have a breakdown. It has been, I wanna say about eight years now and I have not taken a single medication for depression. I went from 6 to 0. Cold Turkey, baby girl. Let me tell you, God is absolutely a healer. He can Um, heal your mind. He can, basically.Just bring everything back to its equal state and heal your holy. But there's a lot of work that needs to be done with that, so I will be praying for you sweet girl KDBC. 

It's Sheena from Saskatchewan and I normally call in on just the Daily Audio Bible Praying scriptures Over legal situations and I heard covered in his blood, um, calling about her brother, so I'm going to pray over that First Chronicles 28:20. David also said to Solomon, his son, Be strong and courageous and do the work. Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord God, my God, is with you. He will not fail or forsake you until all of the work of the service of the temple of the Lord is finished. Lord God, we lift up to you, Derek, brother of covered in his blood. Please give him the strength and courage he needs to push through until his September 19th court date. Father God calm his fears and ease his frustration. My God, make your presence known to Derek. Remind him that you will not fail him or forsake him, and that you will continue working in his life until his work is done. Father God, please also cover his family with your peace and love As they wait for their father, grandfather and brother to come home. Harlem at Derek to my prayer list covered in his blood. And I'll be praying for him on September 19th and leading up Love You. 

[stranger-awakening]

Audio Gifts

Hey, everyone!

It’s the end of the year again so I’m gonna gift out my audio masters from this year in case anyone’s interested. There’s 7 audios under the cut!

You’re more than welcome to trade/gift these but if you do just list them as ‘revolution-trade’s master.’ Oh, and don’t ever list them for sale. Thanks!

In The Heights I Australia I January 20, 2019 (Evening) I MP3 I Untracked Cast: Stevie Lopez (Usnavi), Olivia Vazquez (Vanessa), Joe Kalou (Benny), Luisa Scrofoni (Nina), Marty Alix (Sonny), Margi de Ferranti (Abuela Claudia), Monique Montez (Daniel), Libby Asciak (Carla), Alexander Palacio (Kevin), Ana Maria Belo (Camilla), Stephen Tannos (Graffiti Pete), Richard Valdez (Piragua Guy) Notes: Closing night of the shows four day run in Sydney. There were a few sound issues, but this cast is amazing. [link]

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory I Australia I January 24, 2019 (Matinee) I MP3 I Untracked [link] Cast: Xion Jarvis (Charlie Bucket), Paul Slade Smith (Willy Wonka), Tony Sheldon (Grandpa Joe), Lucy Maunder (Mrs. Bucket), Jake Fehily (Augustus Gloop), Octavia Barron Martin (Mrs. Gloop), Karina Russell (Veruca Salt), Stephen Anderson (Mr. Salt), Monette McKay (Violet Beauregard), Madison McKoy (Mr. Beauregard), Harrison Riley (Mike TeaVee), Jayde Westaby (Mrs. TeaVee) Charlie and the Chocolate Factory I Sydney, Australia I July 21, 2019 (Matinee) I MP3 I Tracked & Untracked Cast: Paul Slade Smith (Willy Wonka), Xion Jarvis (Charlie Bucket), Tony Sheldon (Grandpa Joe), Octavia Barron Martin (Mrs. Gloop), Jake Fehily (Augustus Gloop), Madison McKoy (Mr. Beauregarde), Jayme-Lee Hankeom (Violet Beauregarde), Stephan Anderson (Mr. Salt), Karina Russell (Veruca Salt), Jayde Westaby (Mrs. Teavee), Harrison Riley (Mike Teavee), Lucy Maunder (Mrs. Bucket), Danielle O’Malley (Grandma Josephine), Johanna Allen (Grandma Georgina), Kanen Breen (Grandpa George), Todd Goddard (Jerry/Ensemble), Madison Green (Cherry/Ensemble) Notes: Closing performance in Sydney. A bit of shuffling as there were people around me eating. During curtain call, all three Charlies were brought out for a final bow. [link] Billy Elliot I Sydney, Australia I October 10, 2019 I MP3 I Tracked & Untracked Cast: Wade Neilson (Billy Elliot), Kelley Abbey (Mrs. Wilkinson), Justin Smith (Dad), Vivien Davies (Grandma), Drew Livingston (Tony), Robert Grubb (George), Dean Vince (Mr. Braithwaite/Ensemble), Danielle Everett (Dead Mum/Ensemble), Aaron Smith (Older Billy/Ensemble), Mason Kidd (Michael), Ella Tebbutt (Debbie), Oscar Mulchay (Tall Boy) Notes: Opening night of the 10th Anniversary Australian production. Includes brief comments from the Associate Director, Simon Pollard. Act 1 is full but Act 2 starts at ‘Deep Into The Ground’ as my phone glitched and I missed the first number. [link] Chicago I Sydney, Australia I October 13, 2019 (Evening) I MP3 I Tracked & Untracked [link] Cast: Tom Burlinson (Billy Flynn), Natasha Bassingthwaighte (Roxie Hart), Alinta Chidzey (Velma Kelly), Casey Donovan (Matron ‘Mama’ Morton), Rodney Dobson (Amos Hart), J. Furtado (Mary Sunshine). Ensemble: Todd Dewberry, Mitchell Fistrovic, Andrew Cook, Samantha Dodemaide, Ben Gillespie, Chaska Halliday, Travis Kahn, Hayley Martin, Kristina McNamara, Joe Meldrum, Tom New, Jessica Vellucci, Romina Villafranca, Rachel Ward, Zachary Webster, Mitchell Woodcock, Amy Berrisford. School of Rock I Sydney, Australia I November 13, 2019 (Evening) I MP3 I Tracked & Untracked [link] Cast: Brent Hill (Dewey Flynn), Amy Lehpamer (Rosalie Mullins), John O’Hara (Ned), Nadia Komazec (Patty), Thea Sholl (Freddy), Brendan Rutledge (Zack), Samantha Zhang (Katie), Tobi Clark (Lawrence), Nakita Clarke (Summer), Jacob Drew (Billy), Ezekiel Sciacca (Mason), Julien Daher (James), Jenna Keenan (Shonelle), Lucy de Hosson (Marcy), Anja O’Connor (u/s Tomika)   Billy Elliot I Sydney, Australia I November 20, 2019 (Matinee) I MP3 I Tracked & Untracked Cast: Omar Abiad (Billy), Lisa Sontag (u/s Mrs. Wilkinson), Justin Smith (Dad), Vivien Davis (Grandma), Drew Livingston (Tony), Robert Grubb (George), James Sonnemann (Michael), Gabrielle Dagger (Debbie), Mason Kidd (Tall Boy), Danielle Everett (Dead Mum), Aaron Smith (Older Billy) Notes: The scenes in Act 1 are a little quiet, but they’re clearer in Act 2 because I adjusted my phone. Billy dropped his chair during Swan Lake and you can hear it thump, but Omar recovered quickly. [link] 

Here’s to more theatre in 2020!!

[daryls-dixon-antoni]

Chapter 41.) The First Day of the Rest of Your Life

"Rick sent me to get you. He wants your opinion. Wants Dwight to help us. Dwight says it's why he's here."

I glance up at Daryl, "Do you believe him?"

"He ain't lyin'... Least don't think he is."

"Okay... take me to Rick."

"He thinks it's best you be holdin' Hope when Dwight walks past to get in his truck."

I roll my eyes, but make my way to grab my daughter.

"We just started it;" Rick tell me. "The whole thing."

"What if he's lying?" I ask.

"If he's lyin', I'm gonna kill him real slow." Daryl explains. "When this is done, I don't give a damn if he's sorry. I will kill that son of a bitch."

"If he's lying, this is already over." Rick corrects, then walks away.

"You'll be staying here?" Daryl asks.

"Do you want me to?" I ask, softly.

"I want Hope here. And Mason."

"Mason wants to fight... I don't want to stop him."

"If he dies-"

I cut him off, "Carl's fighting, Rick said he'd keep an eye out for him-"

"You want me to be a dad to him? He stays."

I can't help my small smile, "Okay. He can stay, but your breaking the news to him."

"Alright. As long as he's safe."

"If he stays, can I come?"

He hesitates, "Your asking my permission?"

I shake my head, "More like... your opinion."

"I want you to stay... but know that's not who you are." I smile.

We hear the turkey calls letting us know it's go time.

Rick looks down from his perch on a vehicle, "Rosita. Get into position. I'll signal you. And the wall's gonna hold?"

"It'll hold." Rosita agrees.

As a car approaches we all hear Eugene's voice, "All points are covered. Every contingency is already met. I come armed with two barrels of the truth. A test is upon you, and I'm giving out the cheat sheet." The vehicle stops and the speaker with which Eugene is speaking through stops so it's only Eugenes voice, "H-Hello. I come salved with the hope that it is my dropped knowledge that you heed. Options are zero to none. Compliance and fealty are your only escape. Bottom-lining it; you may thrive, or you may die. I sincerely wish for the former. For everyone's sake. The jig is up and in full effect. Will you comply, Rick?"

"Where's Negan?" Rick responds after a few moments pause.

"I'm Negan."

Daryl and I exchange looks and I mouth, "I love you." He nods, it's go time, we brace ourselves for the explosion.... that doesn't come.

Instead the clicks of weapons surround us and the dumpster people have us all at gunpoint.

One of them let in Negan and his men, we've been double crossed.

"You ever hear the one about the stupid little prick named Rick; who thought he knew shit but didn't know shit and got everyone he that gave a shit about killed?" Megan asks, "It's about you. You're all gonna wanna put your guns down now."

"No one drops anything." Rick responds, evenly. I hear him continue, "We had a deal."

"Tamiel came for the boat things," the garbage leader replies. "Followed ones who took. Made a better deal."

"You push me, and you push me." Negan says. "And you push me, Rick. You just tried to blow us up, right? I mean, I get me, my people. But Eugene? He's one of yours. And after what he did; he stepped up. You people are animals. Universe gives you a sign, and you just shove your finger right up its ass." He laughs, "Dwight, Simon, chop-chop."

We watch as they pick up a coffin and turn it upright. "So, you don't like Eugene anymore. You guys gotta like Sasha. I do, too." He taps on the coffin, "Got her right here packaged for your convenience, alive and well. Now, I brought her so I wouldn't have to kill all of you, and not killing all of you could get complicated. See, I know there's a lot of firepower left in there, Rick. So I'm gonna make this simple. I want all the guns you've managed to scrape up. Yep, I know about those, too. I want every last grain of lemonade you got left. I want a person of your own choosing for Lucille." He turns to Daryl, "Daryl. Ooh, I gotta get me my Daryl back. I see you. And the pool table and all the pool cues and chalk. And I want it now or Sasha dies, and then all of you. Probably. C'mon, Rick. Just because I brought her in a casket doesn't mean she has to leave in it." He sighs when Rick doesn't respond. "You know what? You suck ass, Rick. You really do. I don't want to have to kill her, but that's exactly what you're gonna make me do."

"Let me see her." Rick demands.

"Oh. All right. Just give me a second. I might have to get her up to speed. You can't hear shit inside this thing."

"Sash." I hear Negan say. "You're not gonna believe this crap."

I shake my head, but he mouths "Run!" Again I look around me, everyone is looking at Negan and the coffin. I start slowly backing away.

But that's just as I hear, "Holy! Goddamn!" I look up at the truck with Negan and the coffin on it, and see a very much reanimated dead Sasha bursting out of the coffin attacking Negan.

And just like how at the shooting starts, "Run! Anne fucking Run, Woman!" Daryl says, shouting at me S he shoots the people around us. I shake my head but he shoves me towards the exit. I take off, shooting everyone in sight. When I glance up I see Rick falling off his stand, but I'm running, I know where Daryl wants to meet, and I will be damned if I let him down. I'm shooting everyone I can on my way. Hoping to take out a good portion of Negan's men. I make it out of Alexandria and out into the woods, making my feet move even quicker as I hear the gunfire stop. Praying my people won. Praying that just this once we won.

I hide out in the spot Daryl and I would go to get away from the gates. That's when the gunfire starts again, and I can't help but run my ass back, run to make sure Daryl is okay.

I get there to see not only Hilltop fighters but also the Kingdom, I start shooting, all the men from Negan's group, back to back with Daryl who is very much alive. Shoot the garbage dwellers as well.

The saviors begin throwing smoke bombs and retreating and I know we just won.

"They're falling back," Rick states.

"Eduardo, Bertie, between the houses;" Maggie orders, "Cover the gate! Let's go."

As Ezekiel yells, "Now we finish this!" I realize I've lost sight of Daryl again, and just hope he's okay, following behind Ezekiel and his men, shooting as I do, more men, more shots. I follow Morgan over towards the gates, finding Daryl once more. He gestures towards a truck, yelling now, "Now!" Some men go to close the gates, and I follow Daryl up onto the truck, we look out to see no remaining Saviors. "We did it," I whisper hoarsely.

He pulls me into him and kisses me, deeply. When he pulls away, he has his hands still on my cheeks and his mutters, "I love you." My heart soars and I kiss him again, pulling him even closer to me, not letting him move an inch.

When we pull away once more, I smile and only realize I've started crying when he wipes my tears from my cheeks.

I help Daryl close the gate, and when he sees wooden carved soldier, with Didn't Know written on it, we exchange looks.

"I need to tell you something, and your not going to be happy."

Daryl looks at me, "Your pregnant?" He guesses.

I shrug, "I don't know for sure... but..." I take a deep breath and then sigh. "I had a dream of a little boy last night... he looked an awful lot like you."

He nods, "Okay."

"That's it?" I look at him worried, thinking I was going to be starting another fight.

"We did alright with Hope, you did good with Mason. We'll be here for another kid. But we ain't namin' him Meryl."

I laugh softly, "Then what are we naming him?"

"Can we name him Glenn?"

"Can his name be Glenn Paul Dixon? Because Jesus isn't using his real name, and I'd kinda like to call a kid Paul?"

Daryl nods, "Glenn Paul Dixon it is, I guess." I smile.

"You know, we never gave Hope a middle name."

"What's Mason's?"

"Tyler, after his dad."

"Mason Tyler Andrews? What was Aaron's?"

"Zachariah. After one of my brothers."

"And Tonia's?"

"Anna, for me."

"Could we call him Dimitri then? After my middle name? Our new baby?"

I nod, "I like that the best."

"Dimitri Paul Dixon... and Denise Hope Dixon, call 'me both by middle names?"

"So your name is Daryl Dimitri Dixon?" I tease.

"Yeah, well what's your middle name?" He asks gruffly.

"May."

"So your name is Antionette May Dixon... which isn't as bad." We both grin at that.

"We best not tell Maggie we almost named our kid after Glenn then decided with Dimitri."

"I won't say shit, that's for sure." He pauses, "Have you told Mason of our marriage?"

My heart stops momentarily, "No... we can tell him both news at the same time. Two birds one stone."

[write-havoc]

The Flame is Gone, The Fire Remains Ch. 3

Summary: Negan and Chuck have cemented their relationship and are proud parents of a new baby girl. Will they be able to balance their new found parenthood with keeping their community safe from the perils of the world?

Sequel to This Is How I Disappear

Fandom: The Walking Dead AU

Pairing: Negan/Original Female Character

Status: Ongoing

Contains: swearing, violence, blood, smut

Intended for readers 18+ of age only

Masterlists in my bio

——— Negan’s POV ———

Rick stares at me as my words sink the fuck in. Eldritch isn’t dead. He’s not dead and he wants to make a fuckin’ play.

“I gotta fuckin’ get back home.” I turn to go back to the horses without saying anything. All I can think about is how he took Chuck away from me when I wasn’t looking. And now I’m out here away from her.

Rick calls out, “I’m coming with you. Daryl?”

“Yeah,” the redneck replies and follows me, Dwight, and Rick back to our rides.

“We’re going to see if we can’t find where these walkers crossed into this clear zone,” Michonne explains to our backs and the rest of them fuck off to go do that, I guess.

But I don’t really care. I gotta get fuckin’ home to my babies. Before I mount up, I try to flick off some of the fuckin’ gross shit on Lucille before I put her in her custom made holster on my saddle.

We make it home pretty fuckin’ quickly, actually. I’m not fuckin’ around with this. When we get within radio range, Dwight calls in our fuckin’ approach. After he does that, I turn to him.

“When we get back, I want you to take Rick and Daryl to the meeting room and wait for me. We’re gonna have to fuckin’ talk about all this shit.”

Ne nods and a little while later, we pull up to the fuckin’ stable to leave the horses there. When we get through the fence, Dwight leads Rick and Daryl away and Simon comes up to me.

“What’s going on?” he asks. I know he can tell something's wrong from the look on my goddamn face. And since he doesn’t look like he shit his pants, I’m gonna fuckin’ assume nothing happened here.

I shake my head a little. “It was Eldritch.”

“What?!” he yells before I can explain.

“He dressed up a bunch of biters like me and lead them into Rick’s territory. He found them and put them fuckin’ down.” I let out a sigh. “There was a fuckin’ note on one of them, but I fuckin’ destroyed it. It said, ‘You can’t get rid of me that easily,’ or some shit.”

Simon pulls his hand down his face. “Holy fuck,” he drags out.

“Get on the radio to Hilltop and the outposts and tell them to go on high alert. Explain to them that Eldritch might fuckin’ attack. And talk to The Kingdom, too. Then go up to the meeting room and wait for me. I’m gonna tell Chuck all this shit before I gotta make a fuckin’ plan with Rick.”

He nods, then we both enter the building. I rush up to my floor and fling my office doors open.

———   ———

 After Negan leaves, Chuck finishes feeding Maddie then lays her down in her bassinet. She tries to keep from worrying about Negan, but all she can think about is that he’s out there unprotected.

She knows that’s not really true. Negan can handle himself. And he’s not alone. Not to mention that the saviors and the Alexandrians have kept the entire area around the settlements almost completely clear of the dead. Negan is safer out there now than he ever has been.

It’s just that the stakes are so much higher now. If something happened to him, Maddie would never know her father. Chuck knows what it’s like to grow up with just her mother. Not that her childhood was bad, or anything, but Chuck would have rather had both of her parents there. She’s wondered more than once how she would have grown up differently if her father had still been alive. Maybe she would have been bubbly and popular. Had a high school sweetheart and gotten married right out of college. Been a mother long before now.

Those were things she used to fantasize about before the end of the world. When she knew all the other kids in her class were at some party. Or when her college roommate spent the night at her boyfriend’s. Or even back at Rolling Acres after she was left to clean herself up when one of the guys finally left her room at night. She would always picture her life being much different.

But now she thinks that all of that lead her here. Even the truly horrible things lead her to this moment in her life. And she wouldn’t trade all that for anything because she has true love with Negan. And he gave her a beautiful daughter.

She obsessively rubs her thumb over the locket around her neck that Negan had given her as she paces around the room. It’s been a few hours, so she thinks he should be coming home soon. Or at least he’d send word if something came up. Just as a renewed wave of anxiety jolts through her, the radio goes off. She lets out a sigh of relief when she hears Dwight’s voice saying that they’re almost home. She sits down on the couch, finally able to relax, to wait for Negan to come in. Not too long after that, she hears the office doors open up, so she stands to greet Negan when he comes in.

The second she sees Negan’s serious face when he enters the room, her own cheery expression falls. “What is it?”

“Sit down.” He props Lucille up by the door then moves to Chuck.

As she lowers herself back onto the couch, she notices that Lucille isn’t clean, which means at the very least, Negan encountered the dead. He sits down beside her and lets out a heavy breath.

“What is it?” she asks as her anxiety starts to rise.

“Eldritch is alive.”

All the air leaves Chuck’s lungs. “You saw him?” she chokes out as her eyes well up with tears. She always knew it was a possibility that he survived the assault on his compound, but she had really hoped he hadn’t. And with all the time that passed without hearing from him, she was beginning to really believe that he was gone.

He shakes his head. “Rick ran into a group of fuckin’ biters all dressed like me. One of them had a note. I’ll never forget what that fucker’s handwriting looks like.”

“Oh my god.”

As Chuck starts to cry, Negan pulls her into his side. “You don’t have to worry about anything, baby girl. I would lay down my fuckin’ life for you and Maddie.”

Chuck pulls away quickly to look at him. “I don’t want you to lay your life down!  Your life is with me!”

Negan pauses, seemingly shocked by Chuck’s outburst. “You don’t don’t have to fuckin’ worry, okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

“You’re not going to leave The Sanctuary again. I’m not gonna allow it.”

“Baby-“

“Don’t you ‘baby girl’ me! You’re too important to risk your life now.”

Negan shakes his head. “I’m not risking my life. I’m gonna protect this place. And myself. And you and Maddie most of all. Rick’s downstairs and we’re gonna come up with a fuckin’ plan. No one is gonna be able to come at us and not fuckin’ lose, I promise you. Not with the numbers we got.” He cradles her face and brings her in for a kiss. “So please don’t fuckin’ worry. I hate when you’re upset.”

“Eldritch is smart,” she mentions quietly.

“I’m smarter. You know I’ve changed shit since I dealt with him. Lookouts are never alone so they can’t get picked off. We got regular patrols that keep the area clear and they’d see if Eldritch tries to lead a herd anywhere near us.” He kisses her again. “The Hillfolk have been trained to fight. And with Alexandria... we’re fuckin’ unstoppable. I’m pretty sure I can get the tiger fucker to fight with us, too.”

Chuck can’t help but giggle at Negan’s nickname for Ezekiel. “Don’t make me laugh. This is serious.”

“Don’t fuckin’ worry. I’m gonna find Eldritch and when I do, I’m gonna personally kill him.”

 ——— Negan’s POV ———

I leave Chuck and head back down to the second floor to talk to Rick. When I get to the room, Simon and Dwight are seated to the right of my seat with Rick and Daryl to the left.

Simon clears his throat as I take my seat at the head of the table.“How’d she take it?”

I shake my head. “She’s fuckin’ scared.” I set Lucille in front of me on the table. “What’d everyone say on the radio?”

“Hilltop and the outposts say they’re ready for a fight. And King Ezekiel is headed off to Alexandria to talk to you,” he says to Rick. “When you get back up there, I guess. He said he didn’t want to travel too far away from home. But I’m pretty sure once he hears just how fucked up Eldritch is, he’ll fight with us.”

“Good.” I scratch at my beard then turn to Rick. “What do you think?”

“I think this guy is a threat to us all. Even if you get the brunt of it, it’ll affect us, too. We rely on goods we get from you and without your men, we wouldn’t be able to keep this large area clear,” Rick comments.

“You know he ain’t gonna stop with The Sanctuary,” Daryl pipes up. “And he left those walkers on our land. He’s seeking revenge on all of us.”

“Probably. That fucker’s crazy. And we can’t allow him to set up shop anywhere again. You know how he ran that place of his. Some of those women he had there live at Alexandria now and I’m sure they fuckin’ talked about it.”

Both men nod sadly, so I know it’s true. Eldritch is exactly the kind of man I don’t want living in this world. And he’s the kind of man I can revel in fuckin’ destroying.

Rick looks up at me. “We’re all trying to build something here and there’s no way in hell I’m gonna let Eldritch take that away from us.”

“Good. I’m glad we’re all on the same page.”

“How many men we thinking he has?” Simon asks.

Daryl jumps in. “I couldn’t tell from the tracks out there. The walkers’ tracks were all so could see.”

I chime in, “We have no idea how many men survived our fuckin’ assault.”

“Couldn’t have been a lot,” Rick comments. “We had guys all over the woods after that and we found nothing.”

“That was months ago,” Dwight throws in his two cents. “He could’ve been picking people up this whole time.”

We all ponder that thought for a minute.

“He’s gotta be fuckin’ holed up someplace around here if he’s planning on attacking,” I say. “He’s not gonna do that shit from far away.”

“We’ve still got people in that resort near the place he used to live,” Simon responds. “There’s no one around there . Maybe Gregory knows something.”

“Gregory?” Rick whips his head to me. “I thought you killed him.”

I shake my head. “I got him in a cell.”

Daryl huffs. “You kept that asshole alive all this time?!”

“Oh, that fucker deserves it for all his shit. And he fuckin’ wishes he’s dead. I guaran-fuckin’-tee it.”

“You really think Eldritch woulda told him anything?” Dwight comments in disbelief.

I shrug. “Probably not. But that slippery fucker mighta heard some shit.”

Rick shrugs a little. “Maybe.”

I turn to Dwight. “Get the maps.”

He obeys and goes to the shelves to pick up the maps of the area we have. We’ve kept them fuckin’ updated with the different areas and whose land is whose. Plus all the routes we have marked to various places. Dwight spreads the maps out in front of all of us and we sit forward to fuckin’ see them.

Daryl points to a spot up north. “This is where we found the walkers.”

“Up that far, Eldritch would know the Alexandrians would be the ones to find them,” Simon says as he smooths over his mustache. “We don’t typically go up there unless we’re trading with The Kingdom. And that’s not on the route there for us.”

“He’s putting us in this,” Rick comments.

“I’m sure he hates your fuckin’ guts, too, Rick. I mean, your resident ginger is the one that exploded their escape tunnel.”

Daryl keeps looking over the maps. “There’s no way to tell where that asshole is unless he does something first.”

“We’ll up patrols,” is my answer. “Both in our communities and on the fuckin’ border fences to our areas.” I get a thought. “You think your Dr. Smartypants could set up remote cameras or some shit?”

Rick and Daryl share a look.

“He’s got a lot of stuff in his workshop,” Rick mentions. “We can ask.”

I nod. Cameras would be fuckin’ excellent in this scenario. “If we can catch that motherfucker crossing into our land, we can either end him or follow him back to his base.”

Rick agrees. “We’ll see what Eugene can do. I know he just got a bunch of computer shit. Maybe he’s got some cameras, too.”

“Good.”

“We should get going,” Daryl says to Rick. “Ezekiel’s gonna be waiting on us.”

“Make sure you tell him everything Eldritch fuckin’ did so he knows what he’s gonna be fuckin’ dealing with.”

Rick stands, along with Daryl. “I will. He seems like he’d rather stay out of a fight, but if there’s a threat to his people, he’ll step up.”

They both leave, which leaves me, Simon, and Dwight in the room.

“I want double the check-ins from everyone,” I say to Simon. “I’m not gonna get caught with my fuckin’ pants down again. That mother fucker isn’t gonna get anywhere near my goddamn domain this time. No fuckin’ way.”

“Sure thing, boss. I’ll get on the horn.” He stands to leave.

“Dwight, you’re with me.” I stand and he follows. “We’re gonna go fuckin’ see our ole buddy Greggy boy.”

We both head down to the basement and Dwight unlocks the door to Gregory’s cell after turning off the music pumping into it.

“Ho-ly fuck !” I call out as soon as the door opens. “You smell like fuckin’ shit!”

Gregory turns slowly to me. He’s fuckin’ naked, scraggly beard all long and fuckin’ gross. “Negan...” he starts to plead, but I don’t let him finish.

“Save it, asshole. I’m gonna ask you some questions and you’re gonna fuckin’ answer. If your answers are fuckin’ useful to me, I’ll fuckin’ give you a treat.”

“Yes, sir,” he grovels from his place on the floor beneath me. “Thank you, thank you.”

“Did Eldritch ever fuckin’ mention any other places he might want to live? Did he have any fuckin’ contingencies if shit went south for him?”

Gregory looks up at me. “He didn’t tell me anything like that.”

I shake my head over dramatically and tsk. “Greg. There goes your treat!”

“Wait, wait!” He tries to pull at my pant leg but I fuckin’ step away from him.

“You think I want you touching me? You’re gross as fuck, old man!”

“I’m sorry!” He backs away and looks up at me. “I-I... I was trying to find my way back home... after you exiled me. Eldritch’s men found me. And they took me t-to this country club in Bethesda. That’s where I met Eldritch. That was before he attacked you.”

“What country club?”

“Bethesda Country Club. T-That’s all I know. I promise!”

I nod. That probably is all he fuckin’ knows. But then something I never fuckin’ thought of occurs to me.

“Did you fuckin’ lead Eldritch to me?”

Gregory just stammers and stutters, but that’s answer enough for me. I have no fuckin’ idea why I didn’t put it together earlier. I just fuckin’ thought they crossed paths after Eldritch set his eyes on me. And after we took that fucker down, I really didn’t have any reason to fuckin’ question Gregory. Now, I’m fuckin’ pissed about it.

My fuckin’ fist flies out and socks Gregory before my brain fuckin’ catches up. “You piece of fuckin’ shit! This is all on you!”

“I-I didn’t-“ he tries, but I kick him in the fuckin’ ribs.

“You sniveling son of a bitch!” I lift Lucille above my head to fucking end this fucker once and for all, but I stop myself. A quick death is way too good for this fucker.

“Please, Negan!” Gregory calls out weakly.

I drop Lucille down and that fucker breathes a sigh of relief. “I’m not gonna give you the easy way out,” I growl down to him, then turn to Dwight. “Cut his food and water in half.”

“Wha- Wait!” Gregory actually tries to fuckin’ plead with me.

I can’t deal with this shit anymore, so I kick that fucker right in the jaw and he goes down. I don’t know if he’s fuckin’ knocked out cold and I don’t fuckin’ care. It doesn’t fuckin’ matter to me one goddamn bit. “There’s your fuckin’ treat,” I spit out before I leave the cell.

As I walk down the hall, I think of what Gregory told me. I don’t fuckin’ know if Eldritch does have a place up in Bethesda, but it’s somewhere to fuckin’ start. And it’s the only info I’ve got.

I go back upstairs and gather the guards on my floor into my office. Since Chuck had the baby, I’ve had at least four guards on my floor at all times, one by the stairwell door, one by the elevator, one on my office door, and one by the entrance to my living quarters. I know these guys are loyal, so I trust the shit outta them to protect my family. That’s why I fuckin’ chose these guys in the first place. Now that there’s a threat here from fuckin’ Eldritch, I’m gonna keep these guards on and I’m gonna close off my entire floor to everyone else but me and Simon. Anyone else that fuckin’ needs to be up here will have to be escorted by me personally. And I tell the guards that shit.

I dismiss them back to their posts and walk into my kitchen. I’m surprised to see Chuck standing at the stove cooking dinner, with Maddie in the bassinet nearby. Chuck has really been trying to cook for me and I fuckin’ love it. Sure, they’re all Sherry’s recipes, but Chuck does them fuckin’ good. I told her she didn’t have to do all that shit, but she said she wants to take care of me. I’d never fuckin’ ask her to do anything, but it feels so fuckin’ good to have her want to do shit for me.

I go over to my little princess in the bassinet and she looks up at me with a sweet ass smile. “Look who’s awake.”

“She’s been cooing for about ten minutes.”

I pick Maddie up and bob her around. She always seems to have a smile on her face when I do that, so I think she likes it.

“I heard what you said to the guards,” Chuck suddenly says.

I look at her. “I’m just taking precautions.”

She nods and turns back to the food on the stove.

“No one is gonna get up here again. I promise you that.”

“I know...”

Shit. I do not like the way she said that. “I know you’re fuckin’ worried.”

“Yeah...”

I let out a sigh.“Don’t shut down on me, please, baby girl.”

She slowly turns back to me. “Everything was so perfect,” she chokes out. “Why can’t it just stay?” She brings her hands up to cover her face when she starts to cry.

I walk over to her and shift Maddie so I can hold her with one arm. I use my free arm to wrap around Chuck and pull her into me. “Everything still is perfect. It’s not gonna fuckin’ change,” I try to convince her.

She pushes away from me to turn the stove off. “You don’t know.” She walks away from me then turns back. “You don’t know what he’s capable of.”

Before I can really think, I’m spouting off. “Don’t fuckin’ tell me I don’t know what he’s capable of. I fuckin’ know what that sick fuck wanted to do with you and those women. He told me himself.” It comes out way harsher than I needed and I’m instantly apologetic. Especially when I see her face and she looks fuckin’ hurt. “I shouldn’t’ve fuckin’ said that.”

“What do you mean ‘women’?”

Shit. I never told Chuck about Eldritch wanting me to hand over women for him to fuckin’ breed. I fuckin’ swore the few people that knew that to secrecy. Because that shit’s so fucked up and I knew it would fuck people up to hear about it.

I shake my head. “I just meant-“

“Tell me,” she says forcefully.

I set Maddie back in the bassinet and walk over to Chuck. “Baby-“

“No! Don’t keep shit from me.”

Fuck. She only swears when she’s really upset.

I let out a breath. “Eldritch wanted me to give him women so he could get them fuckin’ pregnant,” I say plainly, so I can get it out. “And he threatened he’d keep you and do it to you after you gave birth.”

I see her eyes well up, so wrap her up in a hug.

“I didn’t know that. That’s awful,” she says quietly into my chest. “We have to kill him.”

“I’m gonna kill him,” I say into the top of her head. “I’m not gonna let him slip away again.”

 A few days later, I send out a team to check out that fuckin’ country club Gregory mentioned. I didn’t go with them because I knew Chuck wouldn’t fuckin’ want me to. It’s all just recon, anyway. Me being there wouldn’t’ve really helped. Especially because they didn’t find shit out there. No one had lived in that fuckin’ place for months. At least. So our only fuckin’ lead blew up in smoke.

———   ———

 The next week is pretty tense, even though it’s quiet. There are no attacks, but all the saviors stay on high alert regardless. That includes the guards on the fifth floor, which stay 24/7 in rotating shifts.

On this day, Negan is sitting on the couch bottle feeding Maddie as Chuck pumps from her seat beside him. Chuck has been pumping and freezing her extra milk just in case it’s needed. Amber had started saving her extra milk, too. And both of their efforts have proven important because some of the milk is being sent to Alexandria in the weekly trades to help Maggie, who has been having trouble producing enough milk for her new baby son. It makes Chuck happy that she can help out in that way. She even sent a little note of reassurance to the other new mother when the guys headed out to the meeting spot this morning.

“You all full, sweet pea?” Negan pulls the bottle away from Maddie and stands to burp the baby.

“Did she empty it?” Chuck asks as she continues to pump.

Negan moves Maddie onto his shoulder and starts to rub her back. “Just about.”

“She definitely has a good appetite.”

“Good thing your titties can keep up.” He gives her a mischievous grin. “Not that I ever thought your fat ass tits wouldn’t perform.”

Chuck laughs. “I’m not to sure there’s a correlation. But I hope you’re not expecting my boobs to look like they used to after all this. They’re probably gonna deflate.”

“I’m gonna be all over those tits, regardless, sweetheart.”

She giggles again. “My husband, the romantic,” she jokes.

Just then, Maddie lets out a loud burp.

“Whoa!” Negan calls out with a laugh.

“And my daughter, the dainty lady!”

“Shit, sweet pea. I must’ve let you gulp in a shit ton of air.” He pulls Maddie forward and wipes her mouth with the towel on his shoulder. “You don’t let ‘er rip like that when Mommy feeds you.”

“She likes it when you feed her, though.” Chuck finishes with the pump and pulls her shirt back down. After putting the milk in the freezer, she comes back over to Negan and Maddie. “Is she out already?” she asks as she gently touches the now sleeping girl’s cheek.

“Looks like it.” He looks from Maddie to Chuck. “We can get our fuck on.”

Chuck laughs. “Yeah. Okay.”

“Fuck yeah.” Negan sets Maddie in the bassinet, then immediately starts to unzip his pants.

Just as Chuck starts to follow him in getting undressed, there’s a knock at the door.

“ It’s Simon ,” comes from the other side of the door.

“Motherfucker,” Negan mutters and pulls his pants back up. “Hang on,” he calls out then waits for Chuck to get decent again before he opens the door.

“Hey, Chuck,” Simon greets as he enters.

“What is it, Simon?” Negan asks impatiently. “We were just gonna fuck.”

“Negan!” Chuck chides, but Negan just shrugs.

“Something weird happened at the trade earlier,” Simon starts to explain. “There was an attack. Sorta.”

“What the fuck you mean ‘sorta’?”

“Well, they weren’t really sure what was happening at first, but... They were getting shot at by slingshots and BBs. And darts.”

Negan looks at Simon in confusion. “What the fuck?”

“Yeah. They didn’t see much. The attackers were in and out pretty quick. But there was a bunch of them.”

Chuck is confused, too. “Is everyone okay?”

“Most of our guys and the Alexandrians have cuts and bruises, but that’s it.”

“Is this Eldritch?” Chuck asks, not sure if she wants the answer to be yes or no.

Simon shrugs. “Daryl tracked them a bit, but he lost the trail before it lead anywhere.”

“Why the fuck would anyone come at us with fuckin’ BB guns? Especially Eldritch.”

“I don’t know, brother. It’s weird.” Simon lets out a sigh. “And with that country club tip not panning out...”

“Country Club tip?” Chuck asks. Negan hadn’t mentioned anything about a country club.

“Simon-“ Negan starts, but Simon answers over top of him.

“The place Gregory said Eldritch might be.”

Chuck whips her head to Negan. “Gregory?” Negan had told her about Gregory and how he was exiled from Hilltop only to show up again with Eldritch. But he made it seem like Hilltop had gotten rid of him. So Chuck assumed the man was dead. “Hilltop Gregory?”

Negan glares at Simon for a second then addresses Chuck. “Yeah,” is all he says.

“I thought he was dead.”

“He’s not,” Negan replies tersely.

Chuck is confused at the way both Negan and Simon are acting. Simon looks almost guilty as he shifts his eyes between her, Negan, and his own feet. And Negan is being purposely curt.

“Where is he?” she asks.

Negan gestures to the door. “Simon?”

The man takes the cue and leaves.

Chuck is still confused. “What is it?”

He lets out a sigh. “If I ask you to drop this, will you?”

“Why?”

Negan nods slowly, but doesn’t raise his head to answer. “I brought him back here after shit went down. He’s been in a goddamn cell since then.”

Chuck is shocked. After all, she knows a tiny bit what it’s like to be in a cell; she spent a day in one when she first got to The Sanctuary. And she knows she didn’t even get the full experience. “That was six months ago! He’s been locked up for six months !” She can’t even imagine being down there for that long.

“He fuckin’ deserves it, Chuck.”

“That’s...” She doesn’t know what to say. “That’s torture , Negan!”

“He fuckin’ deserves it! For all the shit he pulled. He wanted to fucking kill me, remember?”

Chuck shakes her head. It’s one thing to kill someone bloody like Negan did with Brendon and many other people, but prolonged torture? She has a very hard time accepting that.

“Negan...” She shakes her head. “You’re a father , now.”

He swings his arms out wide. “I still gotta fuckin’ be Negan !”

She understands what he’s saying, but she’s still not okay with it.

Negan lets out a deep breath. “He led Eldritch here,” he says more calmly.

It makes Chuck look at him, but she doesn’t respond.

“He led Eldritch here, Chuck. Eldritch was up in Bethesda before he fuckin’ met Gregory. All that shit. All the people we fuckin’ lost is on Gregory’s fuckin’ head.”

She processes all that. It doesn’t make the torture any easier to swallow, though. “I don’t like you keeping him in the cells.”

“What the fuck else would you have me do?”

“Execute him. Being tortured for six months has to be worse than dying!”

“That’s the fucking point!”

Maddie starts to cry at the sudden loud noise. Chuck rushes over to her to calm her.

“It’s okay, baby,” Chuck gently says as she lifts the little girl and cradles her in her arms. “Shh.”

Negan comes over and sets his hand on the baby’s head. “I’m sorry,” he whispers to Chuck. “I’m not mad at you, sweetheart.”

Chuck just nods as she tries to get the baby back to sleep.

“I’m really sorry, Chuck. But he’s fuckin’ staying where he is.”

She looks up at her husband, then back down to their baby. She’s not going to agree with Negan on this, but she knows he’s made up his mind.

“Okay, Negan,” she responds quietly, the baby finally calming down in her arms.