#Everyone and their mom has said this but I will not be killed on this hill if that time comes i will walk down the hill bc its not MY hill
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Hiraya produced one energy sphere then another at ease. There is a smug written in her face. Janaya rolled his eyes towards Hiraya’s boasting attitude. Hiraya and Janaya are taught how to use energy magic by their father in the magic training room of their family home. Janaya is having trouble in making an energy ball.
“You’ll get it. You just need to try harder.” Said Kyle.
Janaya scowled and side eyes at Hiraya. “I am trying. I’m trying harder than anyone else. Do you know how humiliating it is to struggle with something everyone else can just do?”
“You are not, concentrate son.” Said Kyle, ignoring Janaya’s feelings. Janaya frowned. He saw how Nebula demonstrate herself in creating an energy ball (only because she has the power of the Royal Wand) and she did give tips to him. It is always concentration!
Janaya gritting his teeth out of anger. A burning rage inside in belly. He gather all the energy from his surrounding and the mana in his body as much he could. Especially his own anger, converting it into Noir Fuel Spirt. He finally made a energy ball. It is a blue colour that look exactly like a kill ball. Janaya lashes out, throwing it to the wall, sending it flying and disintegrating and splitting the target. Hiraya flinch, seeing another one of her brother’s angry outbursts. Next thing Hiraya and Kyle knew, they watch Janaya fall down to the floor. All Janaya know after he fell, are the the black dots form in his vision and soon he passed out.
“Janaya!” Said Kyle, letting out a gasp. He picks up his son and makes attempts to wake him up. He checks for concussion as well. Kyle realize that his son is not waking up as he check his pulse, still alive but slow due to exhaustion.
~~
Janaya lifts himself up from bed, he rubs his eyes in circle motions. He realizes he is in his room. Janaya see his mother, sitting on a chair, next to her son lying in bed.
“Mom?” Janaya asked. “What happened?” He said confused.
“Your dad says you have a hissy fit during magic practice again.” Janna explained. Janaya nodded.
“Did I unintentionally started a fire again?” He asked another question.
“No.” Janna replied with an answer, relieving Janaya of his anguished thoughts. He did not start fire, that means he is making good progress with his magic.
“After what happened, we can deny it no longer. Me and your father decided that he won’t be your instructor in energy magic. Since you are magically disable in this attribute.” Said Janna.
“But… I wants to be a master wizard likes dad…” he said, looking at his mom in pleading eyes and fear that he disappoints his dad.
Janna felt sympathetic towards her son. “You will be just like him Janaya, just not wielding energy magic.”
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That was a back then when he was a child, Janaya watch from afar to see Second Summer Campers casting spells in The Arena of Camp Synonymous Island. In his time in Townsville, as a part of his magic journey, he had met many magic users. Some are super heroes. Some as civilians. Some as superheroes. He has seen some who have potential to be master wizards. A few who would become Sorcerer Supreme in Eugenia’s eyes.
“You okay Jan?”, Ethan asked.
“I confirm that I am fine with my emotions,” Janaya replied, maintaining his pace and volume and express openness and gratitude to not get caught up on something that bother him. “I appreciate you asking; thank you.”
Janaya out on a half smile, Ethan respond in silence, looking at Janaya’s half smile.
“Trying to get the cat to catch my tongue?” Said Ethan. “Nice try. I know that you are staring at the campers from afar. They won’t be catching up to us anytime soon. Our time right now is young. Don’t be so negative and hard on yourself.”
“……I don’t know what you are talking about.” Janaya lied.
Ethan Corduroy and Nebula Butterfly-Lucitor (mentioned) belong to @ej-cappy-universe
Eugenia Maximoff (mentioned), Hiraya B.C. Bloodworth-Thomason and Janaya A. Bloodworth-Thomason belong to @froppy-butterflyfan2000 (me)
"You'll get it. You just need to try harder."
"I am trying. I'm trying harder than anyone. Do you know how humiliating it is to struggle with something everyone else can just do?"
#Janaya A. Bloodworth-Thomason#cappyverse#Hiraya B.C. Bloodworth-Thomason#cappyverse oc#Ethan Corduroy
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It’s kinda funny that Jason is, in every sense of the word, the most normal Robin. Unironically, there wasn’t anything uniquely special about him before he was Robin. He was a street kid. His dad was a goon (which makes sense for Gotham. It’s a goon breeding ground) and his adoptive mom was a girl who fell in love with the bad boy, got disowned by her upper middle class parents and adopted her boyfriend’s infant son. Even his biological mother isn’t anything special! She was just a doctor who ended up becoming corrupt.
Jason Todd was no circus kid who could do an impossible signature trick. He wasn’t being scouted by some evil hidden organization.
He wasn’t the rich boy genius who lived next door.
He’s not the son of a supervillain (as lame as cluemaster is, he still *counts*).
He’s not the secret son of Bruce Wayne.
And he’s not a metahuman, nor did he led a whole organization of teens to fight when Batman couldn’t.
He’s the most regular boy to ever enter become a hero in Gotham. He wanted to do good things for the sake of doing good. He grew up poor with regular parents, where bad things happened to them. The kinds of things that could happen to *any* person living in Gotham.
There is nothing about him, pre-Robin and as Robin, that makes him Not Like Regular Kids.
His dad was a goon (who, depending on the run, was either killed by Two-Face OR. Just sent to prison and killed in prison! Which makes his backstory even PLAINER-) and his mother was a drug addict with cancer. Jason ends up homeless, and almost steals the bat mobile tires. The only thing that makes him stand out from any other tragedy befallen kid in Gotham is the fact he was bold enough to do that, get Batman’s attention, and continue to be bold enough to go against a crime lord (who was apparently his grandmother, the most interesting person in his family, but since she’s almost never brought up, she’s likely no more significant than a one-issue villain in the crime lord power hierarchy). Batman realized that Jason wasn’t going to really stop, and honestly he kinda grew on him, so he decided to adopt Jason, and eventually allow him to become Robin.
There just isn’t anything amazingly special about his backstory. The few moments where something could have been done to make it more interesting (like his biological mother) but ended up taking the most boring option. You can’t do much of anything now to enhance his past without upsetting much more well established canon, and not without making people wonder “well if his grandmother was such a big name in crime, why hasn’t she been brought up before?”
Jason Todd was a wonderful Robin (providing that he actually has a writer who likes him). He has a golden heart, he’s the voice of reason. He’s everything that a Robin needs to be for Batman. But compared to everyone else, he was nothing special. In a way, his lack of Not Like Regular Kids makes him stand out in a much more subtle way.
As if someone asked the question “Do I need to be someone special to be Robin?” And the answer was “You don’t need to be someone special, you just need to be brave, like Jason Todd was.”
#jason todd#robin jason todd#seriously they could have made anyone his biological mom. to add drama. to add spice#but they instead said ‘well. he’s a simple kid��#everyone else is some delicacy food at a dinner table. and Jason? Jason is like. tomato soup.#HOWEVER. i will NOT forgive the disregard of making Jason stand out from his siblings more.#everyone has a specific niche that they noticeably can excel#or like. a very specific villain is like ‘YOU. i want to train YOU to be MY sidekick.’#or or. the backstory alone is enough to make them stand out.#Jason gets uh. crime? he’s good at killing people.#which isn’t even consistently his Thing by the way since no one knows where to put him on the hero to villain scale#if only there was something he could have that no one else does!#\*i stare long and hard at the All Caste and Magic*#shut up kage#edit: I’m so!! CLUEMASTER. ITS CLUEMASTER.
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Evil is such a funny show. On one hand its very fun, I love the characters and I think the actors have fantastic chemistry but on the other hand its the stupidest thing I've ever watched in my life and also I don't understand why this lady is so obsessed with calling everyone a psychopath. Standard psychologist behavior I guess
#aside from the obvious ableism situation its also like. the LEAST effective conceivable way to handle her problems LMFAOO#''you cant date him mom hes a PSYCHOPATH'' ????????#she could have been like hey listen this guy is not trustworthy this is what he said this is what he did.#but no everyone has to be a psychopath. and also therefore evil and trying to kill everyone. i guess#♥︎#evil#evil cbs#cbs evil#evil paramount
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so many of you talk about the cruel adults in your childhood that negatively effected you and caused lifelong insecurity yet you're still perfectly fine with being that mean stranger to any kid that has the misfortune of existing around you and thats just really gross !!!
#like i get kids can be overwhelming for a various amount of reasons but its not going to kill you to treat children with basic human decency#adults can be just as overwhelming or annoying—if not more. yet if you talked to an another adult the same way you do to a kid#then ppl would fucking hate you and not want to be around you because youre not being cool and witty—youre just mean!!!#everyone has experienced the frustration of being a kid being mistreated by an adult. some more than others#rather its ignoring your bodily autonomy (from sa and assault to hugging you when you don't want to be touched to not letting you#make your own harmless choices like a haircut or whatever). everyone has been talked down to or had their opinion treated like its nothing#or that their thoughts or input doesn't matter. everyone has a childhood experience with a mean or judgemental adult#yet over and over ppl are fine just repeating that cycle of abuse and hatred#like youre a young adult and youre still getting treated like shit by older ones. but youre able to have a drink or you graduated or smthn#so now you feel like you earned that right to be judgemental & angry & mean to a group of people that didnt fucking do anything to you#anyways. this is because im sick and had to go to the store to get groceries and meds#so its a 20 minute walk to the nearest store in 108 degrees bc i dont have gas money and then in the store im ofc using a face mask#like im sweaty and feel disgusting and like shit but this kid was SO fucking excited about his spiderman toy and wanted to talk and#his mom said ‘i told you no one wants to hear about that crap leave her alone’ and like?? no fuck off let a kid be happy?? hes not fucking#doing anything wrong?? so we talked and he showed me the little tiy that lights up and asked if i saw the new spiderverse movie#and i told him i havent! so he asked why so i explained i have photosensitivity and what that means and why i cant see it#(‘even though i heard its super cool!’) and HE WAS SO SWEET... like immediately hid the toy because oh! flashing lights can hurt me!#and then immediately said dont worry because he'll tell me about it so its like i saw it instead!#and like. guys imma be honest with you. i stilm got no fucking idea what this movie's plot is.#but you bet your fucking ass i was pretending like i was following along & was going ‘no way!’ ‘so it's a parallel universe...?’ ‘oh wow!’#like yea its unnecessary. i felt oike i was gonna collapse and im still struggling to breathe at home now. but also i been the kid#who just wanted to talk about my interests and no one wanted to or was dismissing it.#i know it's not a end of the world deal but i also know that crushing feeling. you gotta be the kindness you want to see in the world yknow#anyways. be nice to kids or im not going to be nice to you. they're one of the most vulnerable members of our society and deserves kindness
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Franky saving nami and her calling him big brother..... the connotations of this... big day for me especifically
#yamato shogun actually fits the oden theme akshakaj.... but momo.is the rightful heir and all that......#yamato just carrying luffy again ahsakanak#YAMATOS CHAINS MAKING AN EXPLOSION TO ENTER THE ARENA AJDHAHAAHSJ YEAAAHH!!! YOU TAKE CARE OF KAIDO!!!!#they are waiting for the samurais.... hell yes.... DAMN KINEMON!!!#THEY GOT HIM!!!!! kaido is so fucked up he is seeing oden and all.... wooow.....#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 995#BANGER MUSIC FROM THE JUMP!!! HELL HEAH#the oden isnt oden without being boiled theme its there too omg#nami and zeus akdjaksja together again......#kinemon reciting prophecy while they stab kaido...... banger#kinemon trusting luffy to bring the sunrise to wano and to be the king of the pirates.... hell yes#episode 996#what is law doing... searching for the poneglyph???#episode 997#<- not many thots#i feel like we've been trhu so much with the pink haired samurai.... if he dies i am crying#yamato is such a character.... strong and violent and hates his father and he LITERALLY IS kozuki oden... DO NOT GET IT TWISTED#SHINOBU!!!!! AND EVERYONE JUST STARING!!! DO SOMETHING!!!#OHHH MOMO IS FREE!!! TUNR UNTO A DRAGON!!!#oh his fear of heights.... WHATS THAT as queen said lmaoo#sanji??? protecting momo??? about time he arrived also#and sanji died cut in half.... so sad.....#'its only natural... he is my son' YAMATO ABOUT MOMO AJSKAHSKAJQKAJWKS#one ikoku for luffy killed 1898 samurais... goodbye brave soldiers ajdjsksb was that worth it luffy... the dodge...#nami saying she has never lied in her life ajdhsksjsk#FRANKY!!!!!!!!!! and he is singing and everything.... RUN OVER BIG MOM HELL YEAHHH NAMI CALLING FRANKY BIG BROTHER YEAAAAHHHHH YEAAAAAAHHHHH#you guys dont know what this means to me. i could cry. i am cheering and hollering. i am ripping my shirt off and swinging it.#episode 998
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most fucked up thing at my new job is there's only zero calorie sweeteners at the coffee station in the break room. three different kinds of zero calorie sweetener but no regular sugar because the assumption is that literally everyone is on a diet?
#is this because its a job dominated by women in particular??? idk#that's so weird#like sorry i can taste the difference and i prefer naturally occurring sugar from nature how is that not even an option#drinking nasty bitter af coffee bc i am So Sleepy but i refuse to use artificial sweeteners#they Do taste different and they're not even good for you im not doing that lol#also they got mad at me for telling one of the parents that we took one of the kids temperature and it was 99 and he threw up a little#when his dad came to get him yesterday and all of the other teachers were nowhere to be found#they were like tou shouldnhave had colleen do that#ma'am colleen went home before that and so did you#i should have left already too but waited bc the ratio on the playground was bad#anyway i did NOT say he had a fever i said it was 99 and to talk to the teacher inside#but the dad didnt yalk to her clearly then went home and scared the mom that he had a fever and threw up so she texted my boss freaking out#i literally just said he threw up a little and we took his temperature and it was 99 and to talk to the other teacher#which was all true and there was no one else there to tell him#anyway#apparently the person who had my job before me was a wacko who scared the parents with fake medical information or something#but that is not my fault and nobody told me that or not to tell the parents anything medical until this morning#ugh#also my supervisor is kind of a weirdo#she wanted to show everyone ~cute~ pictures of animals she has killed while hunting???#and i said i didnt want to see#and she was like ~oh it's not dead yet in the picture~#like okay but its dead now???#she traps them first so its a cute little fox in a trap about to be killed 😭#like wtfff#i know trappong predators is a reality but why take pictures like ohhh so cute then kill it#THEN show everyone the cute pictures like yeah isnt he adorable i killed him btw <3#huh??????#she has a bobcat tail on her keychain too she was giving it to the teachers and kids to pet like ohhh its so soft <3
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Do you think if I wish hard enough my mom will get electrocuted by a string of Christmas lights and just go up in a cloud of smoke. It’d be a Christmas miracle
#I’m not even DOWN THERE YET and I want to fucking KILL HER#I have to work Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas. I live four hours away from my family#I told her this MANY TIMES I said I’ll drive down after work on Christmas Eve be there Christmas morning but I need to leave by 3-4 to get#home at a reasonable hour so I can have time to unpack/catch up on a couple days of chores/get plenty of sleep#she called me last night and told me she didn’t schedule Christmas stuff until SIX PM#and when I said why tf did you do that I’m not staying that late#she got mad and upset and was like ‘it’s the only time everyone is free :(‘#BUT THEN proceeded to tell me we were having lunch with her HUSBAND’S family at noon#(ppl I am not close with never have been literally don’t talk to)#and everyone I know is like ‘just leave when you said you were going to anyways’#and like yeah I could but then my family is gonna be ENRAGED that I didn’t do Christmas stuff with them#and they’re like ‘well explain that your mom didnt listen to when you said you needed to leave’#but the thing is. no matter what. they’re going to take her side#I should sacrifice my time and comfort to spend time with them because they’re FAMILY#never mind that literally not a SINGLE ONE OF THEM has EVER come up to visit me#IM always expected to drive down there. but that sacrifice doesn’t count it’s not good enough#but if I stay that late I won’t be getting home until AT LEAST midnight or later#cuz my family has no fucking concept of time so if it starts at six that means it doesn’t ACTUALLY start until 7 so most of them might be#there by 8 so I’ll be expected to stay until at least 10 to sufficiently catch up with all of them#I’m going to scream I’m going to cry#if I leave early I’m the awful ungrateful terrible bitch who never comes to see any of them#but none of them could adjust their days by just a few hours to see me before I needed to leave#FOR MY FUCKING JOB !!!!!!!! SOMETHING COMPLETELY OUT OF MY CONTROL#and like the thing is. my piece of shit manipulative bitch mother#I KNOW she did this on purpose#I know she didn’t plan this until six to FORCE me to stay longer because she was mad I wasn’t staying long#(again… because of work… something I can’t control)#so she’s orchestrated this to put me in this position#where I have to suck it up and stay and be exhausted and have tired migraines for a week cuz I get only a couple hours of sleep and then#or leave and make everyone pissed. I hate her so FUCKING much
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i am too mentally exhausted to even deal with this shit anymore with my mom and grandma and low key wish i'd go comatose for a few years to be left alone tbh
#had a clean up service come by to see the damage and give a quote on the estimate and my grandma wasnt having it#she got upset and started crying to them about she has only 1 daughter and is trying to help her and they're trying to tell her that keepin#all that junk isn't gonna be helping anyone especially my mom but she wasn't getting it and i said i'm not helping clean the junk that's#all around the house cuz i'm tired of it all and having to manage my emotions since i am for sure emtotionally stunted from my childhood#and have to deal with a schitzophrenic mom and an absent sister who's balls deep in denial while i'm struggling to find a job here#and my grandma always stressing me ot saying she's gonna kick me out isn't fucking helping here at all like she thinks it does#so when they left she spent all day sobbing on the phone how i'm a terrible granddaughter who wants to throw out good stuff#when i'm not gonna keep helping sell shit for my mom cuz my sister can do it as her family contribution since she did nothing since dad die#and the thing is i gave them all options on clearing shit out cuz i know this family by now and shit doesn't get tossed but it migrates#cuz i said months ago i can ask some friends if they could come down and help sort and declutter#grandma said no to that and said she'll kick me out if i do it and she didn't want to pay for my mom's shit to get moved into a storage uni#she leaves the clean up to my mom and i think the backyard got worse but she didn't call anyone to throw out the junk like she threatened t#so i call a fucking hoarders clean up service cuz that's what my family is on my mom's side at this point and the city will be called too#and she has this reaction cries all day and calls everyone to say i'm horrible and yells at me saying i'm the one killing her with stress#when she's already been doing that for months to herself when i'm just tired and possibly mildly depressed or something idk#i barely leave my room and don't go outside except to walk my dog but idk cuz my family's attittude was we don't go to doctors cuz#cuz they're for crazy people but of course it's gotta switch up for my mom and no one else and i'm just sick of it all#grandma doesn't accept free help and she won't accept help that i pay for myself with my money set aside for school so i'm done#unlike her when i say i'll do something i stick to it so i'm not doing shit anymore unless i can call a friend to help with this mess#it's gonna sound like such a horrible thing but i can't wait for my family to die so i can live in a clean home again and get help#like deep serious help cleaning and big time grief councelling cuz i barely had time to process my dad's death and being the one to find hi#and that was just this february like god i am going to need so much fucking therapy in my future it's almost rediculous#and probably say screw my mom's side and visit my dad's side a lot more since they seem to be the normal ones in this shit family tree#at least they're not stupid and leave junk everywhere where one neighbour getting sick of not being able to sit outside and enjoy their yar#without mountains of junk staring them right in the face and landing a notice from the city to clean up especially since#we have chainlink fences and at least 7 neighbours can see the backyard and everyone can see the front porch when passing by#i'm just tired of living in these suffocating households and even wanna file a report myself to kick them into gear#its horrible living like this and no one should live surrounded by junk and things they never use or even garbage
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my mom found the thing that started the fight that got me kicked out. so i was right. in my fantasies this happens and it’s great in real life im gonna jump her
#personal#now i gotta call amazon like no sorry my mom looked again and found it#it’s happened to me i get it. you look everywhere and it’s just not there#but oh my god. i was like shit did i send it??? i only remember the other camera? i only remember that one in there#then it’s like well maybe i did take it on accident#and then i was like am i getting so high all the time again that i sent it too???? and don’t remember? that’s pathetic mm#so i called them and god hard to find their number but call and get a note put in the system like hey might have done an oppsie#and that took forever and i did it next day after the fight bc i did feel bad#which was at workkkk 😔#now i gotta call them back nutssssss#also getting my dads ashes separated for my siblings#which either need to do flex time to do that or take day off#which i’ve been doing a lot like hey im sick!#hey! my house got broken into!!#hi again!!! it happened again!!!!#luckily one was a mental health day so ur boys only called out twice yeahhhhhhh#but anyway honestly just happy i let them know the urn situation is 100% on you#said nicer#but i was like hey if u have one just send it to me or the cremation place has some just see if u like any#and i’ll see if it’s easier to pay online or give it to me and i pay them#but urns easily 100 bucks if not more. granted looked at metal before wood but still. ain’t noooooooooooooo way#if it was like. 20 bucks i could see myself being like okay ill fork it over and deliver the goods (dad)#and i’ll rant this everytime but especially when i asked about this when we were funeral planning and before i got them and got told to#basically shut up. no. that trip was super hard didn’t wanna have to do it a couple times#i remember i came home with dad sobbing he was buckled in and i got him out and was just holding him#and i let everyone know hey dads home he’s safe#and i’m distraught holding my dad but distraught and talking to him#and first thing my brother says is when can we get some of the ashes too?#no asking me hey. u alright? no im happy dads home safe nothing just. sooooo#oh i could have killed i could have KILLED.
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So much mental health advice is like "ask for help!! Don't be afraid to rely on your friends and family to get you through this!!" girl what if i do not have friends or family*
#Also nobody has ever 'bottled up' their emotions that's just not a thing#*Family abusive and hates me#Also every time I ask for help I get ignored or people get uncomfortable and leave me forever!!!!!#I don't ask for much!!! Just like!!! Be patient and don't abandon me for being sick!!!#Everyone who was suicidal and got better only got better because their friends and family cared about them and helped them :((#Got them medicine or hrt or helped them clean their room or just gave them affection and a safe place :((#And they're like 'just ask for help :))' :(( girl.................#You only got T because you tried to kill yourself do you know what I got for trying to kill myself. Nothing because no one fucking knows#One time at age like 9 I cut myself and my mom said 'that better be a cat scratch or I'm beating your worthless ass'#Sooooo <3<3<3#I stopped because cutting is useless and I got yelled at but mostly it's stupid and if you actively do it fucking stop#There is no reason for that shit ever#'I treat you too nice for you to be suicidal' obviously not girl I was nine wanting to die!!!!!
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Guys if I ever get cancelled or whatever SOLELY bc some of my ocs are abusers and stuff (not the contents/treatment/narrative framing of their abuse, just the fact some of my ocs are abusers.) I need you to white knight me into oblivion please
#Every now and then I remember there are genuinely still some people whose purity culture values go so far#They think people who have ocs who like. kill or abuse means they support the actions and thus need to GTFO!!!#When really the argument should be about how a person handles and writes these dark subject matters#Bc some people do it well and with respect. and others dont .#and its a matter of educating and avoiding those who romanticize and make a joke out of triggering topics#NOT that a person no matter how the dark subject is framed automatically supports it and likes murder and abuse and needs to be put down !#Everyone and their mom has said this but I will not be killed on this hill if that time comes i will walk down the hill bc its not MY hill
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Someone tell me how to make me not hate myself and make my family not think I’m a bitch and make me want to see my family or drive back down the coast or stay in strange places or do anything other than kill myself I mean whaaatttt haha what a weird thing to say *stares directly into the camera knowingly*
#and don’t say take your medication#fuck. my moms sitting here like I was under the impression you had this all figured out and I’m like well I was under the impression you#we’re going to fucking sit down with me and help me book a room for the last night of driving bc I can’t book and I have to find somewhere#between like three states that will let me check into a hotel room bc if I get somewhere and they don’t let me stay I’m fucked and have no#where to go or sleep bc I can’t sleep in the car on the way back bc my car is packed to the FUCKING top with my brothers shit fuck fuck fuck#fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck#it’s just like being a kid I can hear my family making fun of me for my emotions in the next room over FUCK I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE T#THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS I HATE THIS#I think I’m having caffeine nic and med withdrawals at the same time while pmsing#AND WHILE TRYING TO FIGURE OUT A PLAN FOR DRIVING BACK DOWN#I think I’m the biggest bitch on the planet rn#i was listening to father by tfb in the car and there’s a line about something about falling asleep while you drive and I apparently sang iy#with a lot of passion bc my brother said ‘please don’t’ and that was literally the first time anyone has called me on my recent musicchoices#but it really has all been like I need to go anywhere but where I am right now and I need to die far away and that’s it#no more starting over no more self hatred no more family shit I just need to stop#I want to hire someone to drive my brothers shit down to Florida and then I want to kill myself in New England#Anyways. I’m gonna go try to eat something and take my meds and then move stuff around in the car and also try to get a room somewhere by#the end of my trip and I don’t have much time at all and I need to kill everyone and then myself now now now now now now now now now now now#every time I move my body the entire world spins and idk if it’s anxiety or med withdrawals or being tired or what but I am losing it and I#feel like I don’t have it in me to drive any fucking more this trip and the way back is only just beginning#and in less than hour were supposed to check out of this hotel and go to my aunts for a big family celebration of my brothers graduation and#Mother’s Day and I’m going to see all my family who still has a fucking father and I want to be fucking dead I hate all of this I hate it#I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it
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ok but that is very much different than what happened with tati westbrook. like tati westbrook was also very much in the wrong everyone in that situation sucked.
#tumblr explore page takes me places i wouldn't go w a gun#but like.what do you MEAN she's another tati westbrook rosanna pansino had actual evidence relevant to the horrible things mr beast has don#tati threw a temper tantrum over hair gummies and decided to weaponize homophobia to destroy the career of a gay teenager that was#reliant on her to the point where he was literally calling her mom and ADMITTED that she was concerned that she was concerned that he'd kil#himself if she posted it before doing it anyways. then later went 'oh shane dawson and jefree star manipulated me into it'#to try and rid herself of blame once everyone realized how genuinely evil that one was (jefree and shane absolutely egged her on and probs#gave her the idea to begin w if we're being so fr here but babes . think abt it. how easily would you be persuaded to destroy your loved#ones' careers . it'd be p hard right? esp if you thought they might kill themselves over it? not for tati apparently!#girl was literally treating the hair gummy betrayal w the same seriousness as sa allegations like you Know shane and jefree didn't have to#work that hard) AND THEN years later it turns out that said gay no-longer-teenager has since developed a habitual problem w respecting age#of consent . like those are unrelated situations#srry. my roots are in beauty youtube and i have all of the bye sister scandal seared into my brain#romeo.txt
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Shakes the bars of my cage I need to draw soooo bad I need to draw I need to draw let me draw I have to draw I need to draw I must draw (<- has been too sick to be on electronics much and doesn't like doing traditional art)
#rat rambles#Im starting to feel better tho Im betting within a day or two Ill have made a full recovery#but I just have so many things I wanna draw all the sudden and its killing me#its because I've been thinking abt ocs again and that gives me a lot more options lol#in particular I've been thinking abt marci and toon more again recently#its just the two of them flirting in their mutual workplace environment with toon being dead serious and marci doing it ironically#the main thing is that marci was rly under the impression that toon like. hated her and was taunting her since they're friends with loonie#who long story short is marci's ex childhood best friend who she fell out with after the death of loonie's mom#the two are not on good terms in the slightest and marci knows very well that loonie would want her dead if she had been more honest#so as toon starts to like get more casual and like genuine with marci as the two spend more time together marci warms up somewhat but still#doesn't rly see toon as a friendly figure until they take her out to a museum and marci kind of snaps a bit and asks toon to stop beating#around the bush and is caught off guard when toon seems genuinely kind of hurt and meekly explains that they were just trying to help her#because she had seemed rly stressed and sad all the time and they thought that their lil dates had been helping her relax a bit#that confrontation left marci initially feeling confused but after the initial shock she was mostly left with a sense of dread and guilt#partially because she had just snapped at someone who she had grown to care abt for no reason and partially because she now felt that she#was hiding stuff from toon that would cause them to change their mind on her immediately if they knew#aka that she and loonie are divorced and that she thinks its mom sucked absolute ass (which she did)#oh and also that she used to have a crush on the guy that killed its mom who was also his mom which is also the reason she hates said mom#said mom treated him (aka midas) like shit and tried to get him killed several times#so when all hell broke loose marci at the end ended up mourning midas much more than his mom who everyone else was mourning#including loonie since it actually had a very positive relationship with its mom and a very distant relationship from its siblings#now marci never admitted all of this to anyone but she did act on those feelings to eventually lash out at loonie causing a huge fight#basically she yelled at it for being pushy and clingy and forcing her into a job she didnt want and expecting her to solve all its problems#the two dont necessarily hate eachother but they definitely heavily resent eachother#they still often long for eachothers companionship but not nearly enough for either to wanna make ammends#so toon quite liking both of them causes some internal conflict for the both of them#loonie is fully aware that toon has a big ol crush on marci but doesnt stop them from being friends with her even if it makes it sad#and marci rly wishes that toon wasnt friends with loonie but feels guilty for feeling that way#its a complicated situation and one that rly isn't helped by the fact that one of the three has the dead god queen mom#loonie could get away with a Lot and everyone knows it
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i watched My Neighbor Totoro for the first time, here's my chronological viewing experience:
woo-hoo! dusty old japanese house with japanese architectural details aplenty
these kids got some ENERGY my goodness
family dynamic's adorable. peak quality dad humor
kids: our house is haunted. parents: that's so cool!
hell yeah, wrinkled old lady rep. we need more friendly old women with potato faces and warts like storybook witches. the backbone of society, these ladies
Plot Summary: Small Child Bothers Local Wildlife
sacred tree sacred tree sacred tree
Introducing Totoro! nobody said this fucker's got TEETH???
Uh-Oh! Inadequate Parental Supervision Detected
(you misplaced your four year old! you're not supposed to do that)
4-year-old: i met a magic forest spirit. dad: oh shit fr?
4-year-old: *angrily hugs sister* missed u bitch
this small child has a smile like a toad. like a really really cute toad. like the cutest toad in all existence. i love her she's perfection please just let this child be happy
rice paddies are so pretty....so back breaking....rice is such a prissy crop
*my crush is stranded in a rainstorm* takethisumbrellait'syoursnowBYE *runs away in panic im so good at flirting*
Giant Chinchilla Learns To Hold Umbrella, Is Fucking Delighted By Experience
take this, it will help you on your quest! *hands u trail mix wrapped in a leaf*
LO-FI HIP HOP STUDY LIST!
crouching down to peer at dirt--A++ top notch foundational childhood experience
mom has a big ass forehead
honey! the chinchillas are performing Rituals in the backyard again
help yeah let's jack and the bean stalk this shit
huh so we're all just climbing aboard the giant chinchilla's tiddies now ok
class trip!
the pure adrenaline of Vegetable Gardening
no! the small child is crying! she is bawling her eyes out. no no no. i can't cope with this. emotionally i cannot cope 🥺🥺🥺
i've only had Mei one hour but if anything happens to her i will raze this earth and everyone on it
please someone make this small child smile again
oh no the tall child is crying too
i can't take this. my heart can't take this.
i need a drink
small child running determined to deliver magic veggies to the hospital. this kid is my hero
she is also unsupervised. so, so unsupervised
babe you are FOUR
godDAMMIT ghibli, you cannot give me watercolor sunsets while a small child is missing. u are killing me. my heart is giving out. this is me, experiencing heart failure.
Totoro to the rescue!
no wait CATBUS to the rescue!
i admit i initially thought the cat was a creep. alice in wonderland prejudiced me. i have revised my notions of smiling cats
i've decided the cat is a metaphor for the magic of a robust public transport system
MEI'S OKAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and so is mom. she's a lovely lady im sorry for what i said about her forehead. it's a noble forehead.
happy ending YES bitch!!!!!!
ok. ok ok ok. that was magical.
(as a first-time adult viewer i was worried i wouldn't be able to Access the Magic. but i could and i did and it was incredible. that was culture. that was ART. joy distilled into animated form. holy rites of childhood. i understand now. how glorious, this world we grow out of. how full of marvels. i'm going outside to smell grass and sun and get dirt under my fingernails. miraculous.)
#mr ghibli please you cannot do this to my heart#totoro#my neighbor totoro#spoilers#?#initially i misspelled Totoro as Tortoro throughout the entire post#i fixed it but dear heavens i was tempted to leave it in. you're WELCOME
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Can you do a spencer reid with a bau reader who is younger and very atractive and when the bau are coming to see him at his apartment for whatever reason and use the key (derek probably has one ngl) they just find a mess of clothes everywhere and them just asleep together
When they wake up they are like:👀😶
Bau: 😏😏
They're not snooping, per se, but the BAU are profilers by nature, and it's not hard to spot the neon pink bra that's abandoned by the side of Spencer's recliner.
"Uh, I think pretty boy's mom has kinda aged outta stuff like this," Derek holds up the bra by one single strap, indicating the lacy cutouts that leave very little to the imagination, "Unless she's got a boyfriend we don't know about, and Spence let her have his place for the night?"
"Oh, come on, is it so hard to believe Spence has a woman here?" JJ pleads, but when she gets several 'subtle' glances from the rest of her team, she relents with a sigh, "Oh, fine. Maybe it accidentally fell into his basket at the laundromat."
"Spencer doesn't go to the laundromat," Emily recites, "Because he has 'no way to realistically verify that their machines are sanitized within proper health regulations'."
"Oh, dude, that man is a wet blanket," Derek scoffs, "But don't tell him I said that- he'll probably start on a tangent about mildew."
"We should leave," Hotch proposes, standing by the door where he'd been trying to keep up an air of polite disinterest despite his intent glances around the apartment, "His keys are hung up by the door, so I'm sure we're just not getting a response from him because he's sleeping. And if he woke up he'd kill you all for wearing shoes on his carpet, so it's in everyone's best interest to leave."
"Hold on!" Penelope gushes, "I just want to check!"
She creeps towards Spencer's bedroom, but at JJ's insistent, 'Shoes!', she chucks her heels back towards the door. One hits its intended blonde target, but the other whacks Derek in the arm, and Hotch is surprised that the dramatics that ensue don't wake Spencer from where he's presumably sleeping. He's sure Penelope will offer to kiss it better.
Penelope tiptoes towards the bedroom door, peering inside the small gap that he'd left before laying down, and finding a Spencer-sized lump under the covers. She nearly turns when she notices that it's larger than just Spencer-sized, and-
"Ooooh, guys," She rushes back to the living room, voice barely hushed enough not to wake you, "He's got a girl in there!"
Derek's victory fist-pump is accompanied by a whispered, 'My man!', but Emily reaches for a pen that's resting in the breast pocket of her blazer. She takes the bra from where Derek had set it on the arm of the couch, rooting around for a post-it in Spencer's drawer and finding a stack of them neatly tucked into the front-right corner. Typical. Just the way he does it at work.
While Penelope describes how close the two of you were sleeping beside each other- 'not an inch apart, guys, they were totally spooning!' - Emily scrawls a neat message on the post-it, dotting the I with a heart.
'Congratulations, Spencer and Mystery Girl!' She writes, leaving the sticky note over the lingerie that she sets on his countertop, 'Tell him to bring you around the office sometime soon - your bra is gorgeous, I need to know where you got it ~ Prentiss <3'
#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid one-shot#spencer reid one shot#spencer reid headcanons#spencer reid headcanon#spencer reid hc#spencer reid hcs#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid fic#spencer reid blurb#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid dialogue#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x reader fanfiction#spencer reid smut
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