#Everyday i want to scream
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These bots are testing my patience
Truly, at this point tumblr should intantly check any accounts with the username ‘’untitled’’.
#Every day a new ''follow''#Everyday i want to scream#let whomever made these bots get fireants in their pants >:(
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i had such a horrible day at work, it’s the end of may and all the kids are mentally already on holidays even though there’s still something like 6 weeks before it happens and we had a meeting with our directors and both of them were like, you have to find new ways to appeal to kids, play them some songs, watch a movie, and so on, and our coordinator was like, that’s not the problem, maybe if they could learn their vocabulary first we’d have better results, like how tone deaf do you have to be ??
#maybe the problem is that they only have 3 hours of english a week and they don't care bc 'we can always use google translate'#i want to quit so bad but my twt friend got a message about they wouldn't let him go bc there's not enough english teachers#everyday i want to scream#this job is a prison#lu.txt
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you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me~
#ummmmm this shit hurted :')#(a LOT)#and i still think about it like everyday bc it messed me up for life no lie#it's the “ty didn't want him - not as a friend not as anything” for me#*screams into the void*#kit herondale#ty blackthorn#kit x ty#kitty#queen of air and darkness#the dark artifices#qoaad#tda#tsc
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#p4#persona 4#hanamura yosuke#yosuke hanamura#EVERYDAY IM HOWLING. EVERYDAY IM SCREAMING.#for context this comes at the heel of yosuke charging at mitsuo kubo in rage because of his flippance towards killing saki and he's hit har#but souji and kanji jump in to protect him#like ok a lot of things going on here such as the obvious OH MY GODDDD yosuke being yosuke and taking things on for himself#because he doesn't want to bother people?? because he's made it his own responsibility? because his survivor's guilt is still lingering?#i mean don't tell me he doesn't look at how he surrendered to his shadow like apart from his self-sacrificing propensity#i low key feel like everytime yosuke demands answers about saki's death from the murderer/god/etc there's this undertone of how#he would rather it have been him#he cheapens his own life so much and for what#BUT ALSO!! ALSO!! not just souji jumping in because we know he would he's down bad for yosuke BUT ALSO KANJI#listen you've all heard me talk so much about how i adore kanji yosuke friendships#i can't really tell whether it's kanji or souji that says “haven't we earned your trust yet” but it's a line that hits SO HARD#regardless of which one of them was saying it and i think it hits hard in slightly different manners#it's kanji's admiration and how he looks up to yosuke and how he wants to be closer to yosuke as a friend/kouhai/whatever you want#tatsumi “who's your partner now!” kanji has so much respect for yosuke he wants yosuke to rely on him too!!!#and this stands out because kanji is very conscious of social hierarchies and such but as a kouhai as yosuke's junior#he's so specific about wanting yosuke to treat him as an equal#i smtimes feel bad for kanji because he has a bit of that vibe of a poor puppy trailing after souyo because he wants to be in their convos!#he wants to be included! but critically he also just! wants them to SEE him!!#going a lil off tangent but i think kanji's attitude towards souji is very much one of kouhai respect like he understands his place#of like deferring to souji or getting advice from him and just generally regarding him as a reliable mentor#and it's the same with chie and yukiko? but idk man. with yosuke. guys. with yosuke i always feel like kanji wants to break that hierarchy#that convention. that social norm. to cross a line and be closer to yosuke.#he's more willing to tease yosuke in a way he doesn't with the other 2nd years. and this isn't coming from a place of disrespect either#AGAIN. KANJI REALLY LIKES YOSUKE. he wants to protect yosuke!!! he jumps at the opportunity for yosuke to rely on him!!#i'm getting delulu but there's those hints of “yosuke senpai i want you to see me as a man!!!” kind of energy here and i'm it's yknow hmm
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love anarka saying this right in front of all their friends. what do you think she wanted to throw rose and ivan overboard for. what about zoe. or marc and nath. alya and nino. tell me your theories.
#not even asking about adrien and marinette she probably wants to throw them overboard everyday#anarka in her cabin trying to take a nap and marinette’s one wall over screaming I LOVE MOO#miraculous ladybug#ml migration#noodling
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real talk, yassen is insane for only sleeping 4 hours every 24 hours. baby that is not enough sleep. i know you're like peak health or whatever but that's only enough sleep to live, not thrive. how are you awake and alert everyday. whats wrong with you.
#i want to put him in a jar and shake him#i want to study him under a microscope#but for real adult humans need like a minimum of 7-9 hours of sleep to function properly#im not saying its not possible to live on 4 hours of sleep a day#but i am saying that i dont think the benefits outweigh the cons#maybe im just very defensive about getting a good amount of sleep everyday bc if i only slept 4 hours a day i would start biting people#and ripping doors off their hinges and punching holes into walls#i wanted to scream every time yassen mentioned he only sleeps 4 hours every night#russian roulette#yassen gregorovich#alex rider
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Expression practice via that meme template
I can feel my patience slipping away,,,
#my art#My sona#Don't actually think I've shared my new sona before....#Whoops well new sona I've had a while#Sona who is entering their villain arc#Every day I am taught no good deed goes unpunished 😊#And everyday I find it harder and harder to choose goodness 😊#Soon there will not be any kindness left in this body 😊 you'll have beaten it out of me 😊#And so when I snap and bare my teeth clawing at your throat and scream of how you've wronged me#When I bring you to tears reducing you to your knees sobbing in misery and despair just know#I never wanted to be this way. But you didn't like me how I was before did you?#Or did you just think you could keep beating me like a trained dog#Ehhhh kinda went off on one in the tags whoops I'm just bleh feeling many some kinda ways /neg#Called the little folder with all my layers something edgy like “Do you really fucking think we're friends?” or some shit#Because I was feelings#As my dad famously says “Other fucking people”
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A friendly reminder that since it is election day her in the US, if you feel the need to post about politics, please tag your politics.
Politics is a major issue everywhere, and let's be honest, it can be a huge headache, and not everybody is comfortable with wanting to get politically involved with anything.
That is all.
#screaming internally all day everyday (ooc)#ooc#//please... i beg y'all to tag them#i'm not the only one who fucking hates politics#i'm gonna keep my political views to myself#i will just say though that i am part of the problem and i refuse to vote for anybody who is a total dumb nut#there needs to be an option for “neither” on these ballots 8I#no one can change my mind about voting or not voting#so feel free to softblock or even hardblock me and judge me all you want if my opinion here makes you uncomfortable#-sips on hot cocoa-#politics mention cw
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I need elections to be over cuz this is what its been basically like dealing with (mainly) white leftists (accelerationists tbh)
#just screaming into the void#voting tag#talking brick walls with white “leftists”#who prop themself as the defacto voice for marginalized groups#and never have to worry about another trump presidency#talk about how theyre single issue voters because their concept of leftism boils down to “i read yhe spark notes of the communist manifesto”#and decided to join the left out of spite and guilt for being raised a Christian instead of love and want for progress#and as such refused to break down their deeply rooted right wing ideologies before actually engaging with praxis#which is also why gaza is such an easy single issue for them because if they actually truly cared about genocide#they would have to acknowledge the genocide black and brown people go through in America everyday and work on fixing that#but they don want to#they rather just sacrifices all the vulnerable people in society just to prove a point and make yhemselves feel better#by saying all yhose vulnerable people “deserved it”#because at their core they arent acyually leftists#they are accelerationists who think that they will be the ones to survive and “bring on a new world” (they wont)
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its my birthday and im more excited for echoes of wisdom🤩
#screaming im so excited#FOUR DAYS CHAT#everyday im reminded i cant use commas in the tags :(#ECHOES OF WISDOM#eow#loz eow#i just want to write echoes of wisdom with hearts around it#heeeugh#im ganna frow up im so excited for this game#haters wont understand
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i think i finally realized why ive been feeling so damn depressed lately again
sorry for writing this here. im really hurting actually. im not good. i feel a bit helpless too. idk who to talk to bc i dont want to burden anyons and i donf feel like anything could console me right now
Like. fuck me man. thanks for saving me but. why the hell are you not here. i dont want to do this without you. i hate only being able to remember you. i was supposed to grow old with you, not without you.
And. honestly. even with all this bullshit i say here, all the endless times i spend trying to write down my feelings, abt you, about all the pain ive felt my life, it doesnt get better. not at all. and no words, no poetry takes it away and i truly feel like nobody will ever truly understand how suffocated i felt all my life.
and i want to change thanks to you but. i dont know. nothing's satisfying enough.
no matter what, i truly only feel great when im in that daydream like world you created.
and these past days ive been thinking a lot that. i really wouldnt mind dying right now. not at all. because at least i know what happiness feels like. and i want to stay in that state. probably, even in this life your music will bring me happiness, but i want to be trapped in it.
im tired of being so unseen, and even when im seen, im hurting. but i dont know whats hurting. i think im just really tired thats all.
and. ye. i feel brave tbh. i still havent posted my video to instagram, bc im not brave for that. i dont know. and i feel like a hypocrite bc everything is true that i wrote there but at the same time these are my thoughts currently
in a long while i looked up suicide methods again. i feel so hopeful, but im not really sure if really for the future. jm sorry this is probably alarming. i will probably not kill myself but. idk. im not sure actually. i dknt know what to say. i wasnt cut out for this wordly shit.i feel unlovable but even if im loved, i donf want to be. i dont want anything. just let me stsy in this quiet place snd just. disappear. i wouldnt want my family to hurt if i die but i wont know about it anyways. idk man. i feel strongly i could die calmly this time and thats nice. bc 6 years ago i was terrified, and hurt. but now im content and kind of ready idk man. its not a terrible feeling, its a "this is it, it was nice while it lasted" ig.
there are no clouds in my head actually. i truly dont feel like im thinking irrationally, i feel like this would just be like. the end goal i was looking for. to feel true love once. it was nice.
no goodbye yet bc idk how id kms even if i do. But ill tell u guys if i found something.
#you know it's funny#i still feel this way but the moment i wrote this#on tiktok one of my friends that was there for most of my times followed my secret tiktok account and#the friend that i lost last year checked my account and#i hope she fucking knows how much that means to me#because i always felt like she hstes me but i still deeply feel she cares abf me and silently looks out for me and i feel so sorry#bc in the past 4 days she has checked my account multiple times and idk man#i truly feel like she sees that im struggling i appreciate it a lot#but i could never tell her that because what if im wrong and also#i dont fit in that friendship anymore#but im still really greatful#for checking up on me even like this#*most of my life#noticed a typo#idk anyways i just really needed to scream this into the void. I didn't want to be so sad today. i just scrolled instagram to numb myself#all day. but i got off my phone it was terrible. idk. i feel im not sure i can get my shit together by monday#im sick of having to fall apart and build myself up every fucking day man. and each day i literally wake up telling myself affirmations#trying to convince myself that its oka#it will be okay at least when u are home at night. wait for that moment everyday but. im tired of waiting for night to be happy man.#i have 30 mins to either post that fuckin video and make a fool of myself bc i told myself i need to post it on the 19th. but idk man. Im#terrified it will only disappoint me. people will make fun of me. idk man. its not that funny is it. or is it? how pathetic i am for clingi#g to the only hope in my life like a fucking abandoned dog man. but what can i do. i dont want to depend on you so much. but then who shoul#i depend on? if i depend on myself im just gonna kill myself man.idk. my grief is getting worse day by day. i still practice guitar everyda#hoping that maybe you will come back or something will come back. maybe mywill to live will come back? maybe the Instrument will play a not#that I can depend on? i dont really know what im looking for thats the worst. living is uncomfortable and dark. even when im smiling with m#friends i feel lost.there's something i feel like they know and i dont. when they could name their favorite colors in kindergarten i alread#knew something was different abt me.its really isolating.not having a clue of who am i.i keep saying im finding myself more and more but tb#i still in a way like im always wearing a costume. i wonder how naked id have to be to find myself. sorry for word vomitting.it maybe helps#anyways acchan i miss you.this world feels really stale without you.i wish I could truly show how much I love you with my words or life but#i dont really think it makes a difference.my voice really doesnt matter that much in the end.maybe im too much
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Me panicking because i have 9 missed calls and 5 emails talking about my absence and how "a colleague could take over for me" vs. Me knowing it's really not that important no matter how pushy a client is and that on top of it I'm underpaid and have way to much overtime so i shouldn't even care
#i have 14 hours overtime#collected within 2 weeks lol#you know how it's apparently mandatory for companies in germany to have a way track employees working time? yeah we're#the only company in the whole fucking country who doesn't do that (obviously that's not true there's probably plenty more but it's#still not right.) so we don't get paid overtime nor does it get acknowledged in any way#so technically we're not allowed to even it out (which most people try to do anyway because tf do they think they are asking us to work for#free) but I'm dedicated to not collect any more unpaid working hours so i take the liberty to leave work early this week#so today i left at 12pm (and then got home 4 hours later because another person decided to kill themselves by train. they should call me#first. or anyone else taking the train. I'm sure there'd be plenty of volunteers to do the killing if it means not another miserable day#stuck in a disgusting train). and i logged in again at 6pm today to see if i have anything important messages (stupid i know)#and i saw the missed calls and that there had been an email exchange with me in the cc talking about the 'changes' made in one of the#articles and that someone else could do that for me since i couldn't be reached and at first i felt ashamed and scared#but now it's honestly just pissing me off. that asshole can't write emails and communicate requests like normal people can he#he already called me last week about something completely stupid and acts like his matters are the most important shit in the world#fuck you if you can't wait one day you should have sent this a month earlier because i won't stay online everyday#just to see if there might be an 'important' change you want me to make Immediately. bitch.#also missed two calls from my colleague but she didn't send any messages about what she wanted so i asked her because i felt bad for not#being online and turns out she wanted Nothing. just hear how i was. JUST TEXT ME THEN???? I HATE IT HERE FUCK YOU#seriously i don't get paid enough for this to bother me so much. she probably gets 12-15€ more than me per hour#of course she doesn't care about her overtime as much as i do. i get minimum wage which is less than what I'd get if i still worked at uni#as a student assistant so fuck this shit it's really not important or worth it. from now on i'll only put in minimum effort too#sorry got carried away. rant over now i guess#void screams#work stuff
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franklin armstrong walked for 56 years and is only just now getting his flowers. 56 years. the fact that y'all would sooner let the same thing happen to duke thomas than respect the characterization he's already been given is sick. It's laid out in ink and color for all to see and you still avert your eyes. that you would demote him to straightman for the sake of white comfort is shameful. franklin armstrong walked for 56 years, and you would have duke do the same?
#tomi.txt#dc comics#duke thomas#this goes beyond duke thomas ofc im just being specific.#being nice isn't enough. it never has been and i feel like everyday i'm screaming to make people understand that!!#franklin was as nice as nice can be and yt people still sent in letters saying they didn't want him at the same school as peppermint patty#if you truly believe in representation then understand that it's more than just being seen. it's about being heard too!!#franklin was a wonderful start but he was never the end goal he was never where the fight was supposed to end.#the fight for representation is an uphill battle and if you insist on limiting diversity in the efforts to make characters palatable to all#then you are not on the side of history that you think you're on.
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everytime a man hits on me a puppy dies
#head in hands. as I scream#I’m gonna move to rural Wyoming and become a FARMER.#imsick of this#crepe rambles#-> this post also implies to when I see a man flirt with literally anyone clearly uninterested!!!!!!!!#why do people not understand not to harass people. leave people! alone! if they want to be left alone!#-> -> this is also to say that i. don’t care how they feel abt me. I just don’t wanna know about it like that#I don’t speak to you!!! outside of like an hour where I’m in the same room as you everyday!!!!
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so sweet my dad told me that because I “eat weird” to just let him know if he needs to stop and get me anything on our road-trip.
#Bc I mostly eat fruit but it won’t keep well in the ice chest#he said that if he needs to stop at a store and get me a fruit cup everyday he will#and he’s also checking to make sure all the places he wants to eat at have like salads b shit#cuz I won’t eat most meat#Atp I’m just concerned he going to make me break my fast early by insisting I eat breakfast or smthn#Idk but I’m trying not to worry about being forced to eat bc I want to enjoy the trip#screaming
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When your muses want love and affection sometimes, but you're just very picky with shipping and only like certain ships for certain muses/characters
#screaming internally all day everyday (ooc)#ooc#//my craig wanting his literal boyfriend u_u#my gallagher just wanting to spend time with his bird idol girlfriend robin ig#my joshua just having feelings for jote but is being a LITERAL CHICKEN ABOUT IT LOLOLOLOL#also my christophe muse developing feelings for gregory but is being a dumb tsundere about it and just being a hot anxious mess LOL#and uhhhhhhh my kyle muse wanting to be cute with heidi lol#also alhaitham having a thing for nilou but my alhaitham is very differnt from canon and doesn't have the heart to tell her that he#'s a fatui spy#tl;dr i do have ships of my own... but even with that shipping is just not my main focus#ya get me?#that and sometimes i wanna write ships... but idk maybe i'm self-conscious and i don't wanna write ships just to write them without like#any development????? or chemistry????
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