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#Every month my friend does this and I'm like girl where do you find so much fun
hioyourluv · 22 days
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I hate when my friends post those "this month is over, post 6 pics you took this month and bla bla bla" because most of the times I don't even have 6 pics I took in the month that are not me because I probably spent the whole month rotting in my bed thinking about the worst thing that could possibly happen to me in that state
#Every month my friend does this and I'm like girl where do you find so much fun#No wonder why my mind is fucked up tbh#These are the things that make me go “Wow. It's really bad here”#Because you start realizing this is not normal and start going insane#I'm going through it all right now except the part that you go insane#But I've been hundreds of times before#I simply don't care anymore#I used to want to scream and throw things at the wall only because I saw a classmate going to parties with their friends#While I was dealing with whatever the fuck I'm still dealing right now#I feel like a bird in a cage#and things are getting worse#im growing up and of course I want to experience things and have fun without my mom by my side all the time#but now I can't even start going out because my mom is planning to get a job for us to live without my father's money#so our money will probably not cover all my needs (Idk if she's going to keep money to pay for my therapy#or it's just for the essential like food and other basic needs)#I always feel like I am using drugs to escape this hell that is my life. Sleeping all day and having aggressive thoughts#I would be starving myself by now if it wasn't for my mom and my grandma screaming at my ears to have lunch/dinner#I used to dream of a sleepover with my friends but I never had any#At the end of the day I will always be on the losers side#I say and I keep repeating: It was NEVER my fault#I have never even chose to be like this or live like this#I can see where this is going#Vent
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nanamis-angel · 28 days
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𝐈𝐧 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 ♡︎
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𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 ৹ You and Suguru have been dating in secret and it hasn't been easy but it's totally worth it. So, while at a party, Suguru slips away to see you, not thinking anyone is around. But just how long does it take Satoru and Shoko to figure out what's going on?
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 ৹ suguru x fem!reader, fluff, making out (oop), you and suguru get caught kissing (losers lol), suguru is annoyed, satoru is the annoyer ™, shoko is a girls girl, yaga mention.
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 ৹ 2.1k
𝐚/𝐧 ৹ was literally in class when I got this idea so I started writing it in my notebook. i'm shameless (hearts divider by @/s-h-o-w-y).
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“You could have practically any girl here, Suguru and yet you keep ignoring them all!” Gojo exclaimed at his best friend. The two of them, along with you and Shoko were at a house party of a friend. And despite his flirty personality, he noticed that a lot of the girls their age seemed to flock to Suguru. Yet he ignored their advances every single time.
“I’m just not interested,” Geto replied, putting his hands in his pockets.
Satoru scoffed. “C’mon, you can’t possibly be serious. We’re at a party, have some fun! It’s not like Yaga is breathing down our necks right now or anything.”
But again, Suguru shook his head. “Knock yourself out, I’ll pass.” He shrugged it off.
Up until a couple of months ago, the two boys would go out and meet plenty of girls and would just have fun. But as of late, Suguru had just been ignoring any girls who came his way. Politely, of course, but he always made sure that they knew he was simply uninterested. Gojo would watch as Suguru would turn them away, his jaw agape. He simply couldn’t understand it.
Truth was, Suguru had been dating you for the past couple of months but the two of you had mutually decided to keep it a secret for the first little bit. You were still navigating relationships and you wanted that aspect of privacy. Suguru, of course, wanted to give it to you. But that did make seeing each other quite difficult.
At first, Suguru had no desire to attend these parties anymore. Knowing that he’d be approached by the girls there. But Satoru begged him every time, not knowing about his relationship with you. You didn’t want Suguru to miss out on the fun and told him to go anyway. So, he did. He’d just turn away any girl who’d come his way.
Especially since you wanted to keep things on the down low, he couldn’t just tell these girls that he had a girlfriend without the possibility of the word getting out to your friends.
Satoru glanced at two girls who had their eyes set on him. “Suit yourself.” He shrugged off before putting on a flashy grin and walking towards the girls.
The moment Satoru was distracted, Suguru let out a sigh of relief. “Finally,” he groaned. “That should keep him busy for a while.”
Now was finally his time to slip away—to slip away and find you. You had wandered off with Shoko ten minutes ago and he was already itching to see you again. He pulled out his phone and texted you.
“Where are you and Shoko?”
Moments later, your text popped up on his screen. “Don’t know where Shoko went but I’m down near the bathroom.”
Suguru smiled at your message—finally, he could just be with you alone, even if it was just for a minute. He made his way through the house, ignoring anyone and everyone he walked past. He just wanted to see you and he was determined to do so.
Turning around the corner, Suguru saw you in the hallway, leaning against one of the walls and his face lit up. Shoko was nowhere in sight, and neither was anyone else, just you. He understood you wanted to keep the relationship a secret but boy did it make things hard sometimes.
“There you are,” He said, walking up to you. Immediately, his arms were around your waist, and his chin was propped up on your shoulder. “Felt like I was going to suffocate back there.” He mumbled.
You chuckled a little. “That bad, huh?” You asked him with playful empathy.
Suguru nodded his head. “Satoru can’t take a hint that I’m not interested in any of the girls here. But I can’t just outright say why.” He sighed. Keeping your relationship a secret was hard—especially from his best friend.
Mr. “Six eyes sees all, nosey, and in everyone’s business Satoru Gojo” was hard to keep a secret from. Especially when he didn’t understand why Suguru was so uninterested in the girls around him all of a sudden.
There was no rule in school saying you couldn’t date other students—however, Yaga viewed relationships in school as a distraction and while if he found out you and Suguru were together, he couldn’t do much about it, he would just make it very obvious that he didn’t approve. Which in turn, would just make things awkward.
So, all of this together was the reason why your relationship was so private and secret.
“But now… I don’t have to deal with any of these pesky people.” Suguru grinned down at you. Within seconds, he pulled you into one of the rooms right by the bathroom, just so he could kiss you in private—away from everyone else, hoping nobody would come stumbling across the two of you.
Putting far too much faith that no one would, Suguru didn’t close the door all the way. Instead, he got straight to it, not wasting any time by pressing his lips against yours. You were a little taken aback by the sudden kiss and his eagerness but you reciprocated with fervor.
It had been hard having to sneak around all the time to do something as easy and simple as kissing; like conveniently going to the bathrooms around the same time while in class—or saying you were going to get some of the cursed weapons from the shed and Suguru would offer to “come help” you every time.
Needless to say, he was making up for all of the times he wanted to kiss you but couldn’t. He understood and respected your wishes to keep things private but boy were there enough times when he wanted to kiss you, no matter who was around.
His hands slipped from your back, down to your hips, giving them a firm but gentle squeeze. The only time you pulled away was to catch a breath, only for you to reconnect your lips with his moments later. With his hands still on your hips, he pulled you closer, kissing you harder.
Suguru was a great kisser—granted you had no one to compare him to since he was your first boyfriend but he made you feel alive every single time. He was the epitome of an amazing boyfriend. Respectful, sweet, with just the right amount of playfulness. You swore you could love him forever.
You don’t even remember when you fell for him but you were so glad you did.
But before you could continue, you heard a very familiar voice near the doorway, which caused you both to freeze right in your tracks. “Am I interrupting something?”
It was Shoko, standing in the doorway with a little mischievous grin on her face. You finally pulled away from Suguru, your face as red as a tomato and your eyes as wide as ever. “S-Shoko! Where—how’d you get here?” You asked, stumbling over your words.
“Smoke break in the bathroom,” She said, holding up a cigarette.
Of course, a smoke break. In the bathroom. In the bathroom right next to the room, you were just making out with Suguru in. Suguru mentally cursed himself for not closing the door all the way. At least that would’ve given you a second or two to pull away from each other and make things look normal.
“So, how long has this been going on?” Shoko asked, clearly not giving up on her curiosity.
“Um,” You looked at the ground for a moment. “About three and a half months…”
Shoko looked a little surprised. “Wow, that long? I always assumed something was going on between the two of you but I didn’t know you were together—especially for that long already.” She replied. It was decently impressive, given how strict and nosey Yaga was. Not to mention how nosey Satoru was. “And whose idea was it to keep this a secret for so long?”
Suguru pointed at you almost immediately and Shoko let out a snort at his quickness, provoking you to roll your eyes. Shoko’s eyes moved to Suguru. “And just where is Satoru?” She asked, knowing that the two of them were practically attached at the hip on nights like these.
Suguru sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “He’s occupied talking to some girls who were flirting with him earlier.” He answered, feeling slightly bad that he had just dipped. “I took that as a chance to come find [name].”
Shoko’s lips tugged into a grin as she looked you up and down; your lips were still slightly swollen from the passionate kisses you had just shared. “I can see that.” She teased.
Shoko had been your best friend ever since attending school but for some reason, you wanted to die of embarrassment. You wanted nothing more than to crawl into a little ball and blip out of existence. It was pretty embarrassing when you were caught making out with someone, even if it was your best friend who caught you.
“Honestly? I’m just impressed you two managed to keep this a secret for so long.” She said, crossing her arms. “Yaga-sensei is practically breathing down our necks most days and Gojo is awfully nosey.”
“Trust me, it hasn’t been easy,” Suguru muttered under his breath, earning a quick glance from you.
“You’re not going to tell Yaga, are you?” You asked Shoko. Shoko wasn’t a snitch—you knew that much but there was a little anxiety in the back of your mind that word might somehow get out to your teacher and make things awkward in places like the classroom.
“You won’t hear a word from me,” Shoko replied.
You let out a relieved sigh and smiled but it got you wondering why you were even anxious to say something about your relationship before. You reached out and your fingers laced with Suguru’s and he squeezed your hand.
However, just moments later, you heard footsteps coming from behind Shoko and towards the doorway to the room. It was Satoru, stumbling over after hearing your voices. “Is Suguru over here? He just disappeared.” He said, his voice slightly dazed.
But his slight daze immediately went away when he saw you standing right next to Suguru, your hand in his. “Ooooohhh what’s going on here?” He teased, leaning his arm on Shoko’s shoulder. It was pretty obvious what was going on. He had observed enough, and Suguru had talked about you enough to know that you liked each other at the very least.
Shoko rolled him off her shoulder and you narrowed your eyes at Satoru. You knew it was practically impossible for him to keep his mouth shut about certain things and you weren’t taking any chances.
“Keep. Your. Mouth. Shut.” You said firmly. You almost sounded like a mother scolding a young child.
“Okay fine,” He groaned, knowing there was no use in fighting you. He could tease or annoy Suguru all day but you were definitely not the girl he wanted to cross. You were not as forgiving as your boyfriend was. “How come I’m the last one to know about this though?” He looked at Suguru, feigning humorous offense.
Suguru began to walk towards the door, your hand still in his. There was no use in trying to hide anything around Shoko and Satoru anymore, so why would he? “Because you have trouble keeping quiet about certain things.” He replied to Satoru as he passed by him. “AKA you have a big mouth.”
Shoko just snickered, following you and Suguru out of the room. “What? What do you mean?” Satoru exclaimed, following behind the three of you. “I can keep a secret! I promise. C’mon you guys I’m not that bad!”
“Name one secret you’ve kept,” You said, looking back at him over your shoulder.
Satoru hesitated as if he was trying to think of one he could say. But then he crossed his arms and turned his nose up. “Well, I can’t say them because they’re a secret, obviously.”
Although this was obviously not true, it earned around of laughs from the three of you as you returned to the party. Even though this wasn’t how you planned your night to go, part of you was quite relieved that you no longer had to hide your relationship with Suguru around Shoko and Satoru. It felt like a weight had been taken off of your shoulders.
And Suguru? He was the most relieved out of all of them.
And he definitely kissed you a lot that night.
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sceletaflores · 3 months
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you need a seat? i’ll volunteer!
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pairing: tashi duncan x fem!reader
summary: how much of a selfish douche does patrick have to be to not beg tashi to sit on his face every night? you certainly would.
—or: you show tashi what she’s missing out on…
word count: 3.7k
contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, girl kissing, oral (fem!receiving), fingering (fem!receiving) but not really, cheating (i can't stop lmao), patrick catching strays, a hint of "there's only one bed" trope, kinda sad angsty wlw pining, like this got a little depressing at the end lmao, more plot than i thought it would have when i started writing it (i physically can't not write so much plot it's a disease), no use of y/n.
author's note: AHHH HAPPY PRIDE!!! this is purely self indulgent lmao no one asked for this but i just had to write it. this is my first ever wlw fic!!! I know, please stop clapping, it was my duty to post one during pride month. i'm still writing the homoerotic wlw friendship fic, i promise it's coming! i just wrote this one way faster than i thought i would lol okay hope you love it! mwah xoxo
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You and Tashi sit across from each other on the bed of some fancy hotel room in Texas the night before a match against UT with a new, exciting charge in the air between you.
Actually, the two of you sit on the only bed in the room after a mix up with the hotel’s booking but “You girls are close, you don’t mind sharing? Right?”
Your coach was right, you don’t mind sharing at all. Not one bit.
You and Tashi were more than close. The two of you have been best friends since middle school, and playing tennis with each other just as long. Whether it was playing side by side or with one of you standing on the opposite end of the court. It was you and her, always.
You realized your feelings for Tashi Duncan were a little more than platonic when you were 15 years old. You were staying the night at her house, laying on her bed with your legs tangled together under the covers watching Mean Girls as Tashi idly braided your hair. It was during the Halloween party scene where Cady catches Regina and Aaron kissing when Tashi spoke up, breaking the comfortable silence between you. “Have you ever kissed a boy like that?”
You just shook your head silently, leaning further into her hands as Cady stormed out of the party on-screen. You didn’t know why she was asking you, you told her everything. If a boy kissed you like that she’d be the first to know. Tashi was silent for a few more seconds, tying off the end of your braid and resting her hands on your shoulders. 
“I could show you how,” she had said, “You know, for when guys want to kiss you like that.”
You immediately felt your heart start to race, palms suddenly sweaty. Her suggestion caught you off guard, but you think you heard that girls actually do stuff like that. It’s just practice, it’s not like it’s a big deal. Plus Tashi’s your best friend, you trust her.
You turned up to face her, searching her eyes for any hint of a joke, but you found nothing. Her face was earnest, bottom lip trapped between her teeth as she looked down at you, and her eyes filled with a mix of mischief and something deeper. 
“Okay,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.
Tashi smiled, moving closer until your faces were inches apart. You closed your eyes as your breath mingled with hers, her hand settling softly on your jaw. The first touch of her lips was soft and sweet, sending a shiver down your spine. 
You gave in, parting your lips to let her tongue brush against yours. You felt something deep inside of you slot into place, like a missing puzzle piece finding its home. You got lost in the moment, mind going blank and fuzzy as your tongues explored each other's mouths. The thought of kissing boys suddenly felt unimportant and distant with Tashi’s lips moving against yours. 
All too soon she was pulling back, her face soft and flushed. “See? Not so scary,” she said with a smile, you swore you could hear a slight tremor in her voice. She brushed her thumb across your cheek once before she laid back against the headboard and cast her gaze to the movie still playing.
“Yeah…” you trailed off, leaning against her to watch Regina get hit by the bus. Your mind was still buzzing, the feel and taste of Tashi lingering on your lips.
That kiss changed everything for you, but the two of you never talked about it again. Tashi woke up the next morning as if nothing had changed, smiling at you over breakfast talking a thousand miles a minute about the new tennis club in town. It’s been years since then, years of pretending like you’re not really in love with Tashi Duncan, that it was just a phase. You just adore her so much, a totally normal platonic best friend kind of adoration, that’s all.
It’s well past the time you and Tashi should have been asleep by now, pre-match jitters and excitement keeping the two of you up late. You’d been talking for hours already, and somehow the topic has shifted into raunchier territory. Maybe later you’ll blame the pent-up energy for blurring your filter, but for now you were content swapping recaps of the latest hookups you’ve shared with Art for her stories with Patrick. 
The addition of Art and Patrick was definitely a new development in your relationship with Tashi. Two boys who thought they were being discreet following the two of you around the Adidas party all those months ago, taking turns chatting you up on the beach and inviting you back to their hotel room.
Then college started, and Patrick and Tashi were suddenly dating, and things sort of changed. Tashi was spending more time with him, leaving you alone to stew in your anger of feeling like the next best thing. Well not completely alone, Art was always there. In a similar situation as you, with Tashi taking up all of Patricks time when he’d visit campus. Leaving the two of you to sit in Art’s dorm sharing a handle of cheap vodka every time you got kicked out of your room so Tashi and Patrick could have some “alone time”.
Art’s hot, and he seemed to like you so it felt easy enough for the two of you to pair off like Tashi and Patrick did. You wouldn’t call it dating, friends with benefits fit better, but he was a nice distraction from the new Tashi shaped hole in your life, so you indulged. Tashi was overjoyed when she found out, so happy for you in every sense of the word. Constantly badgering you for details, like she was just before your conversation took a complete one-eighty.
“No way Patrick hasn’t asked you to do that before,” you ask a little too loudly, beyond shocked as you stare at Tashi sitting across from you on the mattress. 
She scoffs quietly, shaking her head as she picks at a loose thread sticking out of the comforter. “It’s kinda been all about him lately,” she trails off with a shrug, like that’s a good reason.
Fucking Patrick. You think bitterly, fighting the urge to roll your eyes. What a fucking loser.
You knew he wasn’t good enough for Tashi the second you met him. All flashy bravado and superficial charm, like a peacock strutting around with no substance. Tashi seems to like him enough so you bite your tongue at every dreadful detail she’s told you about their relationship, because you’re such a good friend.
Seriously though, how much of a selfish douchebag does Patrick have to be not to beg Tashi to sit on his face every night? 
You certainly would.
“Art and you do that a lot?” she asks nonchalantly, but her eyes have a certain look to them. One you can’t quite place, they’re sharper than they were before. Maybe even a tiny bit challenging, as if she’s daring you to go there. You were never one to back down from a dare, especially in front of Tashi.
You nod slowly, fingers toying with the edge of your shorts.  “A couple times.”
“How’s it feel.” She makes it sound like a question, you know her well enough to recognize that it’s more like a thinly veiled demand. Her voice is barely above a whisper but she may as well have shouted at the top of her lungs with the way it cuts through the space between you so sharply.
You see flashes of Art red-faced and needy as you knelt on top of him with your knees on either side of his head, of him spilling inside his boxers as you rode his face, using his tongue to get yourself off.
It has warmth pooling in the bottom of your stomach, thighs subconsciously clenching together. You imagine yourself in Art’s place, laying flat on your back as Tashi kneels above you, chasing after the taste of her with your tongue. 
“So good…” You whisper back, voice breathy like you just got done training. You can feel Tashi’s eyes on you, intense and persistent.
You meet her gaze, her familiar brown eyes dark and blown out in a way you’ve never seen before. She looks flushed, her cheeks tinged with the slightest hint of red. Her lips part ever so slightly, revealing a glimpse of teeth as she bites down on her full lower lip, a tiny gesture that sends a zing up your spine. It's like the room's temperature just shot up by ten degrees, creating a kind of heat that makes you feel light-headed.
Tashi’s stare is unwavering, it makes your skin crawl in the best way possible. She looks hungry, you feel a pang of unfiltered need shake your body like thunder. You’ve never felt deja vu before, but you’re guessing it feels something like this.
The offer slips past your lips before you can think of stopping it, “I mean…I could– I could like show you. If you want.”
For a second, there’s silence. All you can hear is the sounds of the city three floors below you flowing in through the window. The distant hum of traffic and faint chatter blend into a muted sound that underscores the tense quiet in your room. You hold your breath, forcing yourself to meet Tashi’s gaze. Every second that passes feels like an eternity, you’re inches away pretending it was a joke, from running away with your tail between your legs.
Then, Tashi’s eyes narrow slightly, her lips curling into a sly smile. She leans closer, bridging the small gap between the two of you, the mattress shifts under her weight. “Show me,” she murmurs, her voice an assertive whisper. The intensity in her eyes deepens, locking you in place. 
Your heart pounds in your chest, each beat echoing in your ears louder than the city noise outside. It wasn’t really a joke when you offered, but you never thought Tashi would actually call your bluff. You thought she’d just laugh, roll her eyes and call you gross with a smile on her face. You swallow hard, a mix of excitement and nerves churning in your stomach.
Tashi’s hand moves to your chin, gently bringing you closer to her. The electricity between you is palpable, a charged connection that sparks and crackles. Her thumb brushes across your lower lip, and you feel yourself leaning into her touch, your body responding before your mind can catch up. 
“Show me,” she repeats, her voice firmer now, a command wrapped in velvet. Her words hang in the air, thick with anticipation and promise. You nod, a small, almost unnoticeable movement.
“We- Art and I - we…uh, usually kiss before,” you try to sound casual. Tashi’s eyes soften, a hint of a smile playing at the corner of her mouth.
“Then kiss me,” she says. You can feel her breath on your skin, warm and inviting. You lift your hand, reaching out slowly. Your fingers brush against the bare skin of her arm, you’ve touched her millions of times before, but this one is different. It’s a hesitant touch that feels both daring and delicate. She doesn't tense or pull away; instead, she leans into your touch, her eyes never leaving yours.
Your throat feels dry, your mind racing, but you push through, your hand glides up her arm, tracing a path to her shoulder. Her skin is smooth, warm under your touch, and you can feel the slight tremor that betrays the relaxed front she’s putting on.
With every inch you cover, you feel more confident, your movements becoming more assured. You lean in, close enough that you can see the slight rise and fall of her chest, hear the faint hitch in her breath. 
It’s been years, but you swear her lips feel the same. It’s far from the slow, sweet, timid kiss you shared on her bed. The moment they touch yours, it’s like a jolt of electricity runs through your veins, reigniting a fire deep within you that never truly died. Tashi’s lips are soft, yet demanding, moving with a hunger that mirrors your own. You can taste the faint hint of her coconut lip balm and something that’s uniquely Tashi, a flavor you had almost forgotten but that comes rushing back with each second that passes. You lose yourself in the rhythm, the pressure, the way her tongue teases yours, exploring, claiming.
If you weren’t so fucking turned on, so fucking wet that you’re drenching your panties, you’d probably laugh. You’d laugh at how easily you ended up back here, kissing Tashi just because she asked you too. You wonder if she’s thinking about that night too, if she ever thinks about it.
Your hands find her waist, pulling her closer as the kiss deepens, becoming more urgent, more needy. Without thinking, you drag Tashi onto your lap, her chest pressing flush against yours as her knees fall on either side of your torso. She responds quickly, her fingers tangling in your hair, grip tight enough to have you softly moaning into the kiss. 
It’s messy, wet, and consuming, with spit mingling as your mouths fight for dominance. Tashi still refusing to let go of the upper-hand even though you’re technically supposed to be the one showing her something, but you don’t mind. She bites your lower lip, hard enough to make you groan, sending a shock-wave of heat straight to your core. Her nails scratch against your scalp, pulling you impossibly closer. The air is thick with the sounds of your ragged breathing and the soft, breathy moans escaping your throats. 
When you finally pull apart, both of you are breathless, your foreheads resting against each other, a small thread of saliva connects your lips before it falls and breaks.
“Show me,” she whispers again, this time softer, almost a plea. And with a newfound confidence, you nod, ready to give her whatever she asks for. 
“Off,” you say impatiently, tugging at the waistband of her shorts. Tashi’s eyes darken, her breaths coming in shallow, rapid gasps as she quickly complies, shimmying out of her shorts and tossing them aside. You waste no time, falling on your back so fast your body bounces on the mattress. You can hear the bed creaking as Tashi crawls towards you again, you can feel the warmth of her as she throws a leg over your hips and starts to make her way up your body. She pauses at your chest, hesitating. She looks down at you, her eyes more unsure and vulnerable than you’ve seen in a long time. You just smile softly, giving her a small nod and bringing your hands up to squeeze her thighs reassuringly. Her body is warm and firm beneath your palms. 
“Tash,” you whisper, thumbs rubbing soothing circles against her skin. “It’s just me.” 
Her eyes search yours for a second longer, the tension melts from her face, and she smiles. A real smile, not the fake one she gives pushy interviewers, one that reaches her eyes. Her vulnerability bleeds into tender determination as she gives you one sharp nod of her head and shuffles the rest of the way up your body.
With a sense of urgency, your fingers hook around the edge of her panties. Tashi’s trembling, her fingers digging into your shoulders, hips lifting slightly to aid you slide her panties to the side.
Being face to face with Tashi Duncan’s cunt feels euphoric. It feels right, like this is where you should have been all along. She’s so wet for you and so beautiful and so perfect and you can hardly wait to taste her.
You lean in, trailing soft, deliberate kisses along her inner thigh, feeling her shiver beneath your touch. Tashi’s breath hitches, a soft moan escaping her lips as you get closer to her core. Her eyes never leave yours, her pupils completely blown out and swallowing up the warm brown.
“Please,” she breathes, her voice strained with longing. The plea sends a thrill through you, has you feeling power drunk because the great Tashi Duncan is begging you. Begging you to touch her, begging you to make her feel good, begging you to make her come.
You lean your head up, you can feel her body tremble as your breath brushes against her. Your lips part, placing a soft kiss directly over her clit, making her squirm and moan softly above you. You flick your tongue out, teasing her, drawing more desperate sounds from her lips. 
The taste of her is intoxicating, flooding your senses and making you crave even more. She tastes like girl sweat, like girl sex, you moan into it, gripping her thighs hard to try in vain to steady yourself.
Tashi’s eyes flutter shut, her head falling back as your tongue slides through the wet slit of her cunt. Her response is immediate, lowering herself down against your tongue as a low moan escapes her lips. Tashi's hips start to move, instinctively seeking more, needing more.
You watch her through half-lidded eyes, mesmerized by the sight of her losing herself in the pleasure you're giving her. Her hands tangle in your hair again, guiding you, urging you on as you work your tongue along her slick entrance. The rhythm of her hips matches the movement of your mouth, and you can feel her growing wetter, absolutely drenching the bottom half of your face.
“Fuck, that’s so good,” she mutters, pretty face pinched in pleasure. You moan into her cunt, angling your head up to drag your tongue up her slit slowly until you reach her clit, sucking it into your mouth and swirling your tongue over it.
“Oh my God,” Tashi huffed. She opened her eyes and looked down between her legs, catching your glassy eyes with her own. The sight only made her grind her hips faster, “You’re so pretty,” She muttered. Your loud moan is muffled by her cunt, heart fluttering in your chest at her words. You can feel your hands start shaking with the intensity of the moment, way more intimate than it probably should be.
Her right hand lets go of your hair, shooting out to lace her fingers with yours. She squeezes your hand hard, gripping onto it like a lifeline as she rides your tongue. You respond in kind, using your free hand to guide her, to hold her steady as you delve deeper into her cunt, your nose bumping up against her clit. Her taste, her reactions, everything about her is perfect, and you can feel her body tightening, her muscles clenching as she gets closer and closer to the edge. 
Her other hand tightened its grip on your hair, pulling you closer as she threw her head back, a low, throaty moan escaping her lips. “Don’t stop,” she gasps, her voice breaking, “I’m close.”
You increase your pace, tongue working even faster over her clenching cunt. You lose yourself in her, in the rhythm of her movements, in the sounds of her moans and gasps. You need her to come, you need to see, need to feel it, need to hear it, need to fucking taste it.
And she does, her body tensing, then shaking as she cries out your name, the sound filling the room. You hold her through it, your tongue moving in gentle, soothing strokes as she rides out her orgasm, her body slowly relaxing under your touch. You keep going, tongue greedily soaking up everything she has to give you until she’s spent, her body going limp, her breath coming out in ragged, uneven gasps. 
Tashi leans back, blindly shoving her free hand down your shorts to delve between your slick thighs. Your hand grips hers harder, moaning out as her fingertips brush over your throbbing clit. Your eyes open to find Tashi already staring down at you between her thighs, the fancy hotel lights making a halo of light around her messy hair. She looks fucking ethereal.
You’re so worked up it only takes a few clumsy circles of Tashi’s fingers to push you over the edge. Back arching off the bed as you come, hips bucking up into her touch. Waves of pleasure crash through you as you soak your panties in your release as Tashi watches with sharp eyes. She keeps going, fingertips sliding over you with featherlight touches until you’re squirming away, thighs instinctively clenching shut.
Tashi falls back onto the bed next to you, the two of you laying beside each other trying to catch your breath. The room is filled with the soft sound of your synced heavy breathing, you can feel her hair tickling your neck from where it splayed out on the pillows.
“Patrick’s coming to the UT game tomorrow,” her voice breaks the silence, voice raspy and winded, “Art will probably be with him.”
Her impassive tone feels like a bucket of ice water dumped over your head. You look at her, but Tashi keeps her gaze trained on the ceiling, her chest rising and falling quickly. She’s sweaty, baby hairs sticking to her forehead, her face is stony. She closes her eyes, it feels like a door slamming in your face. Your heart sinks in your chest, dread starting to wrap its tendrils around you.
Patrick and Art. Their names hang in the air like a storm cloud threatening to burst, casting a shadow over the fragile intimacy of the moment. You swallow hard, trying to muster a response, but words elude you in the suffocating silence. Tashi speaks again before you can, “We should all go out to dinner after, like on a double date or something.”
You trace the outline of her profile with your eyes, the curve of her jawline, the faint sheen of sweat on her skin. Each detail seems sharper, more defined, as if etching itself into your memory with painful clarity all over again. You have to close your eyes too, scared if you keep them open that the tears burning your waterline will start flowing down your cheeks. All you can do is lie there, next to Tashi, and feel the weight of her words settle into the space between you, putting up a barrier you're not sure how to breach. 
“Yeah…sounds good.”
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ashlynlovestlou · 6 months
Note
au where abby and reader try to break up :( emphasis on try because they just can’t stay away from each other :( they keep talking and updating each other on things until its too much :( and they get back together :)
(i put my whole back into this pls be nice)
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꩜ cw: no smut! abby x reader , reader works at a plant nursery , use of pet names
masterlist
the breakup was rough, to say the least. abby was your first everything. your first kiss, your first girlfriend, your first time, and your first everything. letting go of that was the most heartbreaking thing either of you had gone through.
for the first couple of days post-breakup you could hardly eat and sleep. your bed felt so cold and so empty without her next to you. you even made a lame attempt to line some pillows up to make it seem like she was there. and for a moment, it worked. but her warmth wasn't there for you to wrap yourself in. her heartbeat wasn't there to listen to. and her arms weren't there to hold you.
despite the fact that you were no longer together, you still talked. but less than you usually did. so many messages went unsent, so many calls you hesitated calling.
the first time either of you said something to one another was when you texted her about the job you had been wanting for months. she knew how much you wanted to work at the plant nursery down the street from your apartment, even before you split up. so when you got the email after your interview saying that you got the job, your immediate instinct was to tell abby.
"i got the job!" you had texted her.
"thats so amazing, sweet girl." she responded so quickly that it made you think she was anticipating you to text her, "i'm proud of you."
and just like nothing had happened, you were smiling down at your phone, just like you were before you started dating.
but that butterfly feeling in your stomach didn't last long. it fizzled out when you remembered you were no longer with her.
over the course of a few days you chatted about little things. your first day at your new job. abby's dog, alice, catching a squirrel in her backyard. little, minuscule check-ins. nothing too serious.
until a week later.
"want to get coffee?" she texted you one day, while you were busy watering plants in your denim overalls.
it caught you by surprise, to say the least, but you knew it wasn't a date. just two friends getting together for a cup of joe. not romantic. strictly platonic.
no matter how much you wanted to run back into her muscular arms and re-familiarize yourself with her touch, you couldn't. you shouldn't.
"sure." you text her shortly, without the need to ask which coffee shop or what time. while you were dating, you went every week to the same coffee shop at the same time on the same day and ordered the same drinks.
⋆┈┈。゚that weekend 。┈┈⋆
the second you walked through the doors of the coffee shop your nostrils were filled with the scent you missed so much. freshly brewed coffee grounds and warm pastries. the faint sound of chattering from the patrons enjoying their own treats.
and there she was.
sitting at a two-top table, two drinks in front of her. she was already looking at you, as if drinking in your image. even though you were devastated and still a little heartbroken from the previous events of your relationship, you did a good job at finding distractions. which is probably why you don't look quite as miserable as she does.
"hey." she greets you as you sit down across from her, "i um.. i ordered the drink you usually got."
she remembered.
the mug was still warm, so she couldn't have been here long.
"thank you." you nod your head once, "you didn't have to do that."
"its no big deal." she shrugs, taking a sip of her coffee. black coffee, to be exact. you never understood how she liked the bitter taste of it, "how have you been?"
"good." you answer quickly. so quick that she has a hard time believing you. in reality, you were good. but you weren't great. you would never admit to her how you would accidentally cook too much food, because you were used to cooking for two people. you would never admit how many times you've accidentally set the table with two plates instead of one. how you would say 'i'm home!' when you walk through the door, even when nobody was there to listen, "i'm uh.. how about you? how are you?"
"im alright." she says.
but not good. you tell yourself in your head.
for a little while the two of you just chit-chat back and forth, talking about nonsense for half an hour before you notice abby fidgeting. she can't sit still, and you have a gut feeling you know exactly what's wrong.
"sweetheart, i cant keep doing this." she finally breaks, interrupting your rant about how you hate one of your coworkers.
"wait, huh? did i say something wrong?"
she shakes her head, glancing around the coffee shop like she's afraid to make eye contact with you, "we shouldn't have broken up."
oh.
your heart falls to the pit of your stomach, "what?"
"i need you more than i thought i did. i miss you."
you stare at her, eyes wide and lips slightly agape. you wanted to hear these words, but you never thought that you ever would, "are you.. are you serious?"
she nods her head, looking back at you.
"abby, i... i dont know."
"baby." she breathes deeply, desperate for your forgiveness, "dont make me beg."
you exhale, your cheeks burning crimson. you had waited so long for one of you to finally say something about the breakup. you waited so long for one of you to speak up about the need for the other.
without another moment of hesitation, you lean across the table, boldly smashing your lips into hers.
she tastes sweet, just as she always had. she was wearing coffee and the mint chapstick you left at her house and she never returned it, because she liked being able to have your taste with her.
she smiles against your lips, baring all her teeth. when you both pull away you can see her little dimples on her cheeks, the skin underneath her freckles a light shade of pink.
"so.." she says, folding her hands together in her bulky lap, "is that a yes?"
421 notes · View notes
astonmartinii · 1 year
Note
was wondering if you could do a smau or just a normal fic where oscar or lando are with an f1 academy driver!reader where maybe outside of racing reader is slightly alternative/rockstar gf vibes
hope you have a good day!
i am the rockstar, girlfriend | oscar piastri social media au
pairing: oscar piastri x f1academy!reader
yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, oliviarodrigo and 320,984 others
yourusername: you get the best of both worlds
view all comments
user1: enough is enough i need to be her
user2: someone get that kitty cat some ear protectors
yourusername: i found cumberland sausage in a bush by an airfield baby has ear drums of literal steel
user3: i wish i was a kitten who gets to go racing and live the rockstar life
racerbia: tell cumberland i love her
yourusername: so what about me ???
racerbia: i guess i love you too
yourusername: that's what i thought
user4: miss ma'am lowkey MADE it tell me why she has olivia rodrigo in her likes
user5: the girlies been using y/n as a pinterest board
oscarpiastri: who's the cutie
yourusername: oh oscar i'm blushing ... 😊
oscarpiastri: i meant cumberland sausage
yourusername: blocked.
oscarpiastri: i'm in your walls.
user6: i'm sorry but what the fuck is going on in here
user7: i'm just going to sit back and observe
vogue
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liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername and 1,209,875 others
tagged: yourusername
vogue: this month's cover of british vogue is up and coming f1 academy driver y/n y/ln who doesn't let her day job as a driver stop her from embracing her chosen aesthetic in every other aspect of her life. inside y/n touches upon her struggles as a woman in the industry, inspiring others and her scene-stealing cat, cumberland sausage.
view all comments
user8: mama on the cover of vogue ???
user9: okay i don't have a clue what the f1 academy is but i may have to tune in now
yourusername: thank yew for having me 🥰
user10: i guess we can't gatekeep her anymore
user11: gatekeep? girl she had like 700k followers before this
racerbia: oh so my bestie FAMOUS famous
yourusername: don't worry i'll never forget you
racerbia: i should hope not you still don't have your road license and who gives you lifts?
yourusername: i love youuuuuuuu
user12: so not to make it about a man, but oscar always be in the comments/interacting with posts from/about y/n
user13: rocks for brains
user14: tbf they'd be cute
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oscarpiastri
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liked by landonorris, yourusername and 609,812 others
tagged: premaracing, yourusername
oscarpiastri: can't keep me away from the racing, i spent my spare weekend in barcelona with the f1 academy. oh i guess i bumped into y/n (most importantly, cumberland sausage)
view all comments
user15: so ... did anyone else know they were friends?
user16: i went dumpster-diving to find out and they're very lowkey but they've known each other a long time but because of racing in different series they've mostly had an online friendship
user15: interesting
yourusername: always nice to see you osc, and cumberland says thank you for her dreamies
oscarpiastri: she's always the highlight of our visits
yourusername: stop playing hard to get
oscarpiastri: you know i'm always easy for you
user16: @yourusername you know we can all see this, right?
yourusername: i know that's half the fun
user17: god this comment section fried my brain
landonorris: so THIS is where you were this weekend
oscarpiastri: yes, i told you this
landonorris: nooooo, you skipped my bbq because you were visiting "someone special"
oscarpiastri: yes, cumberland sausage
landonorris: i'm on to you, piastri 🤨
f1academy
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liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername and 331,896 others
tagged: premaracing, yourusername
f1academy: OH WOW !! y/n y/ln sets a record this weekend in monza by leading all practices, grabbing pole for all three races, leading all laps and winning all three races - the first ever f1 academy grand chelem
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user18: okay but like what more does she need to do to get to f2?
user19: i was there and lord this is DOMINATION
racerbia: that's MY teammate
yourusername: i love youuuuuu
user20: now this is a slay
oscarpiastri: wowowowowowowo
yourusername: do i make you speechless?
oscarpiastri: you know it
user21: these bitches are just teasing us now.
yourusername
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liked by racerbia, oscarpiastri and 679,034 others
tagged: oscarpiastri
yourusername: happy birthday cumberland sausage, my pretty girl, mummy and daddy love you xxx
view all comments
user22: MUMMY AND DADDY?
user23: so we're all idiots?
racerbia: i thought you guys agreed on a soft launch?
yourusername: too much effort, cumberland's birthday is now
racerbia: your mind confuses me so much
user24: i'm new here someone PLEASE tell me how this cat ended up with the name cumberland sausage
yourusername: when i rescued her the only food i had in my flat was a pack of sausages and it just stuck
oscarpiastri: does this make you a milf?
yourusername: and you a dilf?
landonorris: who are you and what have you done with my teammate?
oscarpiastri: are you just annoyed you found out the same time as everyone else?
landonorris: .... no
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oscarpiastri
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liked by landonorris, yourusername and 788,034 others
tagged: yourusername
oscarpiastri: best weekend, with the best of company
view all comments
user25: mama y papa
user26: obsessed with y/n's need to bring her cat with her everywhere, she's just like me
yourusername: so proud of you osc
oscarpiastri: maybe it's because i had a good luck charm in my garage
yourusername: that's cute, but for real you're just TALENTED AS FUCK AND DESERVE EVERYTHING
user27: loving y/n's brand of aggressive positive reinforcement
mclaren: turns out we ARE a cat friendly garage
yourusername: that you are, and your catering is very good 10/10 experience would do again
oscarpiastri: extra points for letting cumberland sleep on a tyre blanket
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yourusername
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liked by racerbia, oscarpiastri and 821,067 others
tagged: oscarpiastri
yourusername: living the dream
view all comments
user28: that should be me 😭
user29: god i have seen what you have done for others
oscarpiastri: i dream of you often
landonorris: i beg you stop being horny on main
oscarpiastri: you made it weird mate i'm just professing my love for my girlfriend
yourusername: awwww love you too baby
user30: the way oscar is lowkey bringing in y/n's aesthetic
yourusername: i love this thought but really he'd just came for a last min visit and that is my shirt 😭
oscarpiastri: don't expose me like that
user31: now that's MY f1 IT couple
2K notes · View notes
sanyu-thewitch05 · 5 months
Text
Yandere Superhero X Villain! F! Reader
Wanna buy me a coffee: ☕
TW: Dubcon, spankings, kidnapping, bodily horror
PT.2
Your real name is Y/N L/N, but your villain name is Anima. After your latest failure in trying to find a job, you went into the woods to end it all. Then, by some miracle, an entity older than any Abrahamic religion found your dead body and brought you back to life. Your senses were heightened, and you could hear the animal's chatter and noises as words. With a new feeling of power, you went through society doing whatever you wanted. Even if it meant a few people with broken bones or blood on the floor. That was until a superhero by the name of superhero by the name of Ultimate Man appeared and started defeating you in battle.
He isn't going to be a problem anymore after you take him out with your new suit. Not only does it have the abilities and strengths of every animal alive, but it has the strengths and abilities of the extinct ones. It took kidnapping a paleontologist, but it is so worth it.
"Anima, surrender, and you won't get hurt," Ultimate Man commands, floating a few feet above the ground.
"Sorry, but rent's due," You say, running off with the bags of money from the bank.
As you run, he shoots lasers at you, but you dodge them by zigzagging. Unfortunately, this leads to you not paying attention to where you're going, and you run yourself off a harbor walk. The money sinks into the ocean, and you struggle to swim back up. You switch to the abilities of any marine animal, but it's still not helping you. You see your feet entangled in seaweed and try to break free. Your struggle to free yourself has worn you out, and it seems like this is your last run. Your vision goes black as your instincts tell you to go up to the surface and breathe.
~~~~~~~~~~
When you open your eyes, your jaw and ass feel sore. You try to talk, but there's a gag in your mouth.
"How dare you be such a bad girl and cause so much trouble? Do you have no respect for anyone in this city? Who cares if your rent is due? Get! A! Fucking! Job!" Ultimate Man rants, spanking your ass after every word.
"MM! MH! AWCH!" You scream, your legs kicking as Ultimate Man uses his godly strength to spank you.
The tight latex suit didn't help with the spankings, in fact, the material made sure your body could feel them at their full force.
"Oh, I see the worst girl of the century has awakened. How does it feel knowing you almost got yourself killed trying to steal money?" Ultimate Man asks, taking off your gag.
His blonde hair with light blue highlights, aquamarine eyes, and skin-tight latex white and blue suit is a sight for the eyes. His appearance is ethereal, representing his alien origin from outer space sent to help out Earth on its newest supernatural threat(you.) Who knew having the power of every animal in existence would warrant alien help for the planet Earth?
"I'm sorry, Ultimate Man. I was only trying to pay my rent. Honest," You plead, bracing for another swat to the ass. "I didn't get the raise at my job, even though I deserve it, and I couldn't pay this month's rent."
"I believe you," Ultimate Man says, his hand still rubbing your ass. "But that doesn't mean I forgive you for what you did. I was so worried when you didn't rise from the water. I thought I lost you forever. I need a suitable mate, and you're the only one with abilities almost equal to mine on this planet."
"I'm sorry, WHAT?! I thought you were in a relationship with that news writer, Lora?" You ask, lifting your head.
"Are you kidding me? We're just friends. She couldn't compare to your beauty and strength. Now then, how about we get to know each other."
Ultimate Man peels off your eye mask, then takes out his contacts. There are no pupils in his eyes, just pools of aquamarine. It creeps you out, but at least he's still hot.
"I'm ☍⍀⍜⎍☍⟒⋏ ⏃⏃⍀☍⟒⋔. But you can call me Krouken Aarkem, which is pronounced Cro-oo-can Ar-kem. My human father calls me Ken. Now, what's your name?" Ultimate Man asks, lifting your body with ease.
"It's Marnie," You lie, not wanting to give him your real name.
His fingertips glow blue, and he places them on your head. Pain takes over your head as he searches through the deepest parts of your memory.
"Y/N M/N L/N. What a beautiful name. I'll make sure to bring over your cat so you can have your baby," Krouken says, removing his hands from you.
You slap him and stumble to the other side of the couch.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" You groan, holding your head.
"What did I do wrong? Please don't be mad at me!" Krouken cries, jumping onto your body and hugging you tightly. "I'll never do it again unless you want me to! I promise! Just don't be mad at me!"
"Alright! Alright! I'm not mad at you! Just get off of me!" You yell, pushing him off you after feeling his boner on your leg.
"Yay! Now, we can engage in the Plutonian ritual we call Improving."
Krouken starts taking off his suit, revealing his naked body to you. You back up but bump into the couch, leaving you nowhere to run. He touches your suit, liquifying the material and making it fall off your body like water. Krouken kisses you, his hand tracing every part of your body as if he were memorizing it.
"Your heart is beating fast? Do you want to fight me?" Krouken asks his hand on your chest.
"No. It's just something the human body does when we feel certain emotions," You explain, holding Krouken's hand.
"So you are excited to Improve too? Excellent, I can move forward," Krouken replies, his two dicks merging into one with the width of an adult's fist.
Your eyes widen in fear of the inhuman cock in front of you. There was no way it was going to fit. It was too wide to fit in your human pussy. If it were to go inside you, you'd feel it in your lungs.
"Wait, I think we should-" You plead, only for Krouken to shove his massive cock inside of you.
You can feel it moving inside as if his dick was made from thousands of little suction cups that were kissing your vaginal walls. Krouken's arm holds you in place, and he thrusts.
"Keep going, Krouken!" You moan, lifting your leg and putting it on his shoulder.
Krouken bites and sucks your nipples as he thrusts faster, his dick suction cups losing their grip and becoming more slippery.
"You're never going to be a bad girl ever again. I'm going to fill your stomach up with so many babies that you'll never be able to think of doing stupid shit without having trouble standing up. You're going to birth the next generation of my people. You're mine, all mine. Not those villain's colleague or someone else's enemy, mine," Krouken rambles, thrusting at an inhuman rate, destroying whatever tightness your pussy had.
His eyes become white as he cums, his alien cock suction cups releasing thousands of sperm. Upon his sperm's release, his genital suction cups regained their grip on your walls, and sucking on them, making you go into overdrive. You cum on his dick, and he shudders. Both of you relish in your afterglow, sweat dripping from your body.
"So, what did you think of Improving?" Krouken asks, his head resting on your breasts.
"It was good. By the way, why do your people call it that?" You ask, rubbing Krouken's wet hair.
"Because we improve each other's bodies. Once my seed is in you, it will rework some human DNA so you'll be more like me and vice versa. Your skin is already starting to become shiny and ethereal like my skin," Krouken answers, kissing your neck.
Your body feels extremely hot, like lava is in your veins, and your eyes are burning like no tomorrow. Your spine releases a horrifying crack as your body involuntarily jolts upwards. All you can do is scream as your bones and body transform permanently.
395 notes · View notes
mirrorball-writings · 1 month
Text
The Catnapping
You live in Monaco, and while you miss your home, your best friend is your cat, Kiwi. Unfortunately, he goes missing, and you start to lose hope of finding him after a few weeks go by. However, you start to see more and more people mentioning a certain Formula 1 driver who they suspect knows something about your cat.
This is my first attempt at an SMAU story so please tell me if I did a good job or not. Also, this is my first story where I'm using Y/N!
Disclaimer: All photos are from Pinterest, they are not mine.
ynslittlelife
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ynslittlelife days (and nights) in monaco!
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view all 67 comments
yourbff okay you’re living my dream i’m officially jealous
ynslittlelife STOP you’re literally my it girl
isabela.monaco girl you’re my inspirationnnn
f1girls99 okay can every f1 fan agree that we want to be y/n
ynslittlelife i’ve actually never been to one of the races 😅 maybe next time?
liastudiezzz HOW you have to go to the monaco gp this year pleaseee
yourmom Aww, my little y/n is all grown up!
ynslittlelife i miss you so much mom :(
ynslittlelife
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ynslittlelife i have some sad news. by now, most of you have probably seen pictures of my cat, kiwi, in some of my posts. unfortunately, i lost kiwi a couple of days ago, and i have still not found him. i’ve had him since he was a kitten, and he has been my closest friend since i moved to monaco a few months ago. if anyone in the monaco area sees a beautiful tuxedo cat, please please please tell me anything you know about where he might be. i love you, my kiwi!
liked by yourmom and others
view all 25 comments
yourmom Oh no, poor Kiwi! Don’t worry honey, I’m sure you’ll find him soon.
yourbff keeping my eyes peeled.
ynslittlelife babes you don’t even live in monaco 😭
yourbff idc i’m on the lookout for any signs of kiwi
liastudiezzz noooo kiwi is so cute i hope you find him!
albon_pets
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albon_pets the cat distribution system chose us once again 🫡 everyone welcome Moose to the Albon family!
liked by alex_albon and others
view all 160 comments
charles_leclerc welcome to the Albon family, Moose
albon_pets thank you Charles for the enthusiasm
georgerussell63 Omg so cute! Are you bringing him to the next race?
albon_pets yes he will be there!
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ynslittlelife
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ynslittlelife more old pictures of kiwi because i miss him so much :(
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view all 44 comments
yourbff officially crying about kiwi
ynslittlelife me too thank you for your solidarity
ilikecaras dear f1 girls, should we say something
mia_miami i feel like we should…
sof1a.8 say something about what?
ilikecaras alex’s new cat looks like kiwi
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albon_pets
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albon_pets Moose and Alex are ready for the race!
liked by georgerussell63 and others
view all 410 comments
georgerussell Does Moose have his drivers license?
albon_pets moose will not be driving the car
lewishamilton Moose and Roscoe should meet while he’s here!
albon_pets yes please!
norrissgarage I think you guys should talk to @/ynslittlelife because Moose looks just like her old cat Kiwi that she lost
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ynslittlelife
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ynslittlelife studying up on cars
liked by alex_albon and others
view all 124 comments
yourbff please don’t tell me you’re going to a race without me
ynslittlelife okay i won’t (it was a last minute thing)
yourbff WHAT DO YOU MEAN LAST MINUTE?
liastudiezzz i love how she’s always so cryptic like yesss girl never tell us the whole story
m_ana_co literally like is this related to the f1 driver she’s talking to i need to know
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ynslittlelife
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ynslittlelife first ever grand prix in the books!
liked by alex_albon and others
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yourbff it looks so fun!! i can’t even be mad that you went without me anymore
ynslittlelife trust me i wish i could’ve taken you
yourbff next time 🤝
mia_miami OMG LUCKY!! and a paddock pass too?!
isabela.monaco i know this girl is literally living my dream
liastudiezzz right?? i want to be y/n in my next life
alex_albon so good to finally meet you!
ynslittlelife you too!! thanks for inviting me into your garage lol
williamsracing Thanks for making our garage so lively this weekend!
ynslittlelife thank you for explaining racing to me because i don’t know anything 😭
williamsracing anytime 🫡
alex_albon and ynslittlelife
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alex_albon happy reunions 🥹
Please please let me know if this was good because I have never done an SMAU before!! But if you liked it I will definitely do more in the future. Also let me know if you're interested in a part two perhaps...?
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heyftinally · 4 months
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Y'all are going to like this one.
SWIFTIES DON'T TOUCH THIS POST WITH A TEN FOOT POLE, I SWEAR TO FUCKING HELL-
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So my friend sent me this article, and I'm going to tell you why I think it's complete bullshit.
1) wishing us a happy Pride month is the BARE MINIMUM. As someone with her presence in the media and social influence, she could - and should - be doing SO much more than just wishing us a happy pride four days in.
2) "the singer has been an advocate for the LGBTQ+ community" not a good one. She seems to only remember us when it's convenient or benefits her in some way. Case in point:
2018 - "When it comes to feelings and when it comes to love and searching for someone to spend your whole life with. It's all just really really delicate. You know?" Taylor then performed her song "Delicate."
2023 - It’s painful for everyone, every ally, every loved one, every person in these communities.
In the first example, the intentional song reference comes off as extremely tacky. This is people's LIVES you're talking about. People are MURDERED for who they are and who they love (or don't love). This isn't an appropriate time to pull out the "oh-so-quirky" act and be cutesy.
In the second, the fact that she can't even center queer people in their own experience is so, SO telling. I promise, however painful it is for allies, it's 1000x worse for us to LIVE it. Allies don't have to wonder "am I going to get hate crimed wearing this?" before they leave the house - we frequently do. To not acknowledge that shows me that everything she says is performative at best.
3) I wouldn't call what she does "advocacy". She mentions us every now and then when it's convenient for her, profits off of us when we fit her marketing plan, and I've yet to find where she actually apologized for the homophobia in the original version of Picture to Burn. Also, she's real good friends with Travis Kelce's dad, who is a raging transphobe (and I bet his kids are, too). You don't get to call yourself an ally if you willingly allow the people around you to be violent bigots.
4) "always" is a strong word for someone who seems to show her support situationally at best. The full quote was "The way for that to happen is for us to continue to keep pushing governments to put protections in place for members of the LGBTQ community. And I promise to always advocate for that." Yet she doesn't do that.
5) what she speaks out, I've noticed that it's nearly always in the states that primarily agree with her. We don't see a whole lot of her "inspiring ally" speeches in places like Texas or Florida. But I've seen plenty of them come out of already notoriously queer-friendly places. If you aren't willing to face the heat of the difficult places along with the comfort of the easy ones, you don't get to call yourself an ally. Allyship is not easy. Anyone remember when Lady Gaga advocated for us in Russia, under threat of arrest, and her response was "arrest me, Russia! I don't give a fuck!"? Yeah, I've never seen even half that level of true commitment from Taylor.
6) STOP. MAKING. STRAIGHT GIRL SONGS. "GAY ANTHEMS"!!!! FFS it's such a slap in the fucking face of REAL, ACTUALLY QUEER ARTISTS that y'all keep calling these piss pathetic straight girl over produced crap songs "anthems". Fucking stop it. If they aren't queer, they don't qualify to be a queer anthem or icon. Start supporting ACTUAL queer artists with ⅛ this energy, for the love of FUCK. This bullshit pisses me off. Do you need a list of queer artists? I'll make you one by hand if you promise to stop trying to label Raylor Swift's straight girl shit songs as "gay anthems".
7) rainbows and gender subversion are not exclusively nor inherently queer. If that's our bar for "gay anthems", the bar is so low Lucifer himself needs a damn Webb Telescope to just barely see it from hell.
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reputationmunson · 1 year
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hi mads! how r you? i was wondering if i may request a enemies to lovers with fake dating between reader and steve? where she's shy and kinda nice with everyone but somehow doesn't get along with him... and suddenly they have a situation and have to pretend to be dating... btw, love your writing!
i’m doing well and i hope you are too :) thank you for the request and i’m so happy you enjoy my writing that means so much to me! i hope you like this and i hope it's okay i'm making it multiple parts!
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Crossing Lines | S.H x fem!reader
Part One | part two | part three | part 4
summary: Steve isn’t your biggest fan (understatement of the year), so why does he ask you to be his fake girlfriend for a wedding?
content: enemies to (eventual) lovers, fake dating, mentions of drinking, swearing, a guy at the bar is kind of creepy, mentions of reader and eddie having a past fling, use of y/n (not too often)
word count: 3.7K
a/n: this is a little shorter than I anticipated, but I’m going to try and make future parts longer.
_
There’s something strange about having an “enemy”. Especially when that enemy is Steve Harrington. You don’t exactly consider him an arch nemesis, but there’s really no other way you can describe your relationship with him. You aren’t friends with him by any means, not anymore, despite your several attempts at kindness.
Cupcakes you made him got thrown in the trash, smiles you’ve given him had been reciprocated with glares, and every time you spoke was the perfect time for him to roll his eyes.
No matter how many times you try to pinpoint a moment in your life where you might’ve offended him or done something to make him have such a great dislike for you, there’s nothing you can come up with.
You never had many interactions with Steve in high school, which isn’t very surprising. You always tried to stay in the background with your nose buried in a book and he was the complete opposite of that.
You admit you had a teeny tiny crush on him in high school, much like the other girls. How could you not? He was so charismatic and carried himself with confidence. You weren’t as immune to the Harrington charm as much as you liked to pretend you were.
It wasn’t until he became friends with Robin a few years ago that you had your first real conversation with him. She’s been your best friend since you were six and if she was convinced he changed, then you were willing to give him a chance.
He seemed like a completely different person than the boy you used to pass in the halls as he talked about how wasted he got the night before with his herd of wannabe Steves.
He was friendly and also a little bit of a clutz. Sort of awkward, as well. He was still handsome, though. A lot more handsome. His eyes were kinder and his hair as lovely as ever. You always wondered how it managed to still look so soft after that much product usage.
After the first two months of what seemed to be a friendship, he flipped the switch. His words to you became grumbles and he always kept a distance from you, like he’d go into anaphylactic shock if any part of him accidentally brushed yours.
It drove you mad. The one thing in life you always tried to do was treat everyone with kindness no matter what and he made it nearly impossible. You had more friends in your life now than you thought imaginable and it was nearly perfect, but all you seemed to be focused on is how much Steve hates you.
From Steve’s point of view, he would never outright say that he hates you. It’s more of an annoyance. Your shared friend group constantly raves about how great and delightful you are. The kids, who aren’t kids anymore but always will be to Steve, idolize you. Everyone thinks you walk around with rainbows and sprinkles shooting out of every single one of your orifices.
You and your delicious baked goods that you make in celebration every time someone so much finds a lucky penny on the ground. You and your stupid perfume that makes you smell like a damn bouquet of flowers. Your dumb dimples and eyes that some might claim light up a room every time you smile. Don’t even get him started on the short, nonsensical pleated skirts you wear.
You’ll probably be wearing one of those skirts tonight when you all go out for drinks later and he dreads it, terribly. Definitely not because he’s attracted to you, no, that’s insane, but because of all the guys that are going to swoon over you and he’ll have to be responsible for making sure none of those creeps try to touch you.
Robin made it very clear to him early on that you are off limits. She told him he wasn’t ready for a girl like you. You’re different from the girls he takes on dates and sleeps with. You aren’t a ‘hit it and quit it’ kind of gal, as she put it. . She said you’re a hopeless romantic, spending the rest of your life with one person, the type of love they write songs about, kind of gal. Steve wants to settle down one day, but he also isn’t ready for that yet.
Apparently, Robin forgot to give Eddie the same speech because Steve caught the two of you in a hot and heavy makeout sesh at a party awhile ago. Steve put all of the puzzle pieces together that you and Eddie were secretly hooking up. It wasn’t hard to figure out with all the glances, giggles, and body language. Plus, the sexual tension was so obvious.
No one else knew, neither of you even know that Steve’s aware anything ever happened.
Yes, you and Eddie were hooking up. Past tense. It was nice at first, way more than nice. You’d never done the whole no strings attached thing and you felt comfortable with him, but then you both quickly realized that it would end in complete disaster and called off the agreement. Surprisingly, there was no awkwardness after, but you did miss him sometimes.
It was gratifying to be out of your comfort zone, but you needed more. You wanted a love that felt like an easy Sunday morning everyday, but as long as you were confined to Hawkins, you doubt that you’d ever find it.
-
The bar was absolutely packed tonight, crawling with regulars, college kids back for the summer, and high school students with fake ids. There was a bachelor party sitting in the corner shouting obscenities and catcalling any girl that walked by them.
It was overwhelming. Usually this place, even on its busiest night, is still manageable to walk to.
Your walk to the table where your friends are sat feels like you’re climbing mount everest.
“y/n! you’re here!” Robin hops out of her seat at the high top table and throws her arms around you, squeezing you a little too tight. You can smell the tequila on her breath and her cheeks are flushed. That, combined with her affection for you, alerts you she’s one drink away from being hammered.
Everyone else happily greets you, apart from Steve who gives you a tight lipped smile and takes a drink of his beer so he doesn’t have to say hi because god forbid he speaks one of the shortest words in the english language to you.
“I’m gonna go grab a drink. Does anyone need anything?” you ask. “I’ll go get your drink. It’s a madhouse in here, what do ya want?” Eddie offers and you lay your hand on his shoulder, making Steve subtly roll his eyes so no one notices. “That’s sweet, Eds, thank you. I’ll have a vodka cran please”
“He’s, like, so in love with you” Robin says and you laugh. Steve laughs too, but not out of being humored like you are. “He’s not in love with me. He’s just nice, unlike most of the guys in here” you say the last part a bit louder and look at Steve when you say it. His eyes roll again and you think that must be the only thing he’s good at because he does it all the time.
“Your beverage, madam” Eddie says as he hands you your drink and sets down a tray of tequila shots for the table. “Do we really need more shots, Eddie?” Steve groans. “Tapping out already, Harrington? I guess we shouldn’t be surprised” you tease and he scoffs. “Oh, that’s just rich coming from you”
“heyheyhey, can you two have your lovers quarrel another time? We’re all here to have a good time, okay?” Robin reminds you and you give her a sorry smile. “You’re right, I’m sorry. Let’s not waste this tequila!” you exclaim
You all cheers your shot glasses and when you lick the salt of your hand, Steve’s eyes can’t leave you. He’s still staring when you put the lime in your mouth afterwards, you close your eyes in satisfaction and suck out all the juices. He hopes he never has to watch you take another shot again.
When your eyes open, you see Steve staring at you and he immediately looks away and pretends to be occupied by whatever the bachelor party to his left is doing. His mind drifts to the wedding he has to go to next weekend. One of his cousins on his fathers side of the family is getting married and he’s dreading it. Being surrounded by his snooty, rich family members who are all CEO’s of some business and they’re all married to or engaged to the ‘perfect woman’ that they undoubtedly cheat on while away on ‘business’ trips.
Speaking of business, they can’t keep their noses out of Steve’s life. When are you going to get a ‘real’ job?, when are you gonna settle down and have kids?, are you still living in that tiny apartment?. So no, he isn’t exactly looking forward to telling his family he’s a single loser who practically lives in a shoebox.
“Steve? Are you okay?” your voice brings him back from his thoughts. “Yep. perfectly fine”
“Ya sure? You seem distracted” he hates that you care. Eighty percent of the time, you’re still so nice to him, apart from a few jabs every now and then, despite his coldness towards you. “Just thinking, so you don’t have to pretend that you care.”
“Okay…I’m gonna go to the bathroom” you say before leaving the table.
“Why are you such a dick to her? She’s the nicest one out of all of us.” Eddie’s tone is sharp as he defends you. “I’m just stressed about this wedding I have to go to and my entire family is going to be there and I’m the only one without a date so that’s just another thing they’re going to criticize me for” Steve sighs and looks down at his drink.
“How about that girl you went out with last month? Trisha?” Nancy suggests and Steve scrunches his nose. “No can do. I realized I slept with her roommate after the first date” he cringes at the memory of walking into her apartment and seeing a familiar face sitting on the couch.
“You could borrow nance? She’d just have to take off the engagement ring” Jonathan jokes and the table laughs. Steve considers it for a half of a second, but realizes his parents already know about her engagement to jonathan. “Nice job, Steve. You let the only decent girl who liked you get away and now she’s with that byers boy” he recalls his dad saying in a snarky tone.
“I have the perfect idea!” Robin exclaims and everyone waits for her to continue “you should ask y/n to be your date!”
“That’s a terrible idea, Robin. Why would I do that?” It isn’t a terrible idea. His family would be over the mood to see him with a girl like you. You’re kind, funny, smart and gorgeous, but he’d never admit those things to anyone, least of all you. But the thought of spending a whole weekend with you seems like torture.
“Actually, that could work. You need to get over this weird hatred you have for her and this could be some good bonding! Maybe you’ll finally realize how great she is” Nancy states. “I know you all worship the ground she works on, but that isn’t good enough reason to ask her to pretend to be my girlfriend”
“Just think about it, okay?” Nancy says, kindly and he half-heartedly nods. The conversation ceases as you arrive back at the table and everyone stares at you. “What? Do I have something on my face?”
“No. Nothing. We just missed you” You know Robin is acting weird about something, but you let it go. “um, okay. I missed you guys too for the whole five minutes I was gone. I'm gonna go get another drink.” you tell them before making your way to the bar.
“Hey, beautiful. Wanna take a shot with us?” One of the men from the bachelor party asks as you walk by their table. “No thanks. Have a good night, guys” you walk away and hope they leave you alone.
One of the guys gets up to follow you. Steve’s keeping an eye on you and moves to get up when he sees the guy following you. “I’ll be right back, guys”
“C’mon, baby, let me buy you a drink” Steve hears him say to you as you’re standing at the bar. You look uncomfortable and with the bar packed, you barely have a way to escape. “I already said no. Just go back to your friends”
When he moves closer, Steve steps in between the two of you. “She said no, man. Just leave her alone, alright?”
“you her boyfriend?” he slurs and Steve can’t believe the words that come out of his mouth “yeah, i am. so, fuck off, okay?” your eyes widen when Steve says he’s your boyfriend.
“Alright, alright.” the guy puts his hand up in defense “she’s all yours, buddy”
“are you okay? you’re not gonna cry or anything are you?” he asks when he turns around to face you. “No, I'm fine. You didn’t have to do that. Thank you” you smile at him sweetly.
“It’s whatever. Don’t let it get to your head” And just like that the Steve you know is back. “Can you tell everyone that I went outside for some air?” you ask and he nods then you go your separate ways. He watches the door to make sure you get outside alright.
“So, hypothetically” Steve starts once he returns to the table “How would I go about asking her to be my fake girlfriend?”
“Just be honest about it. Oh! and offer to pay for everything!” Robin says. Her advice could not be more vague. “I still think this is a terrible idea, but I literally have no other options, so when this goes to shit just remember it was all of your fault” he tells them before turning around and bearing the crowd to get outside.
When he walks out the door and into the fresh air, he sees you standing up against the brick exterior of the building. “Don’t tell me you came out here to check on me. Thought you said I shouldn’t let anything go to my head?” you raise your eyebrows at him.
“You are not making this any easier” He puts his hands on his hips and throws his head back, letting out a sigh. “Making what any easier?”
“I have a proposition for you”
“I don’t do prostitution, Steve”
“It’s not- would you just let me talk?” he groans and you make a zipping motion over your lips and throw away the invisible key. “Okay, you owe me a favor after what I did for you, right?- don’t make that face you totally do- anyways, I have a wedding to go next weekend and my family is always harping on me about having a girlfriend and I was thinking-”
“you want me to be your girlfriend?” you ask in a skeptical tone.
“What did I say about letting me talk? and no not girlfriend, fake girlfriend. Just for three days”
“You can barely stand to be around me and you want me to be your pretend girlfriend?”
“Look, I know it’s weird, but we don't have to worry about feelings or some shit like that being a problem because there’s no way that would happen” he explains. “What do I get out of it?”
“A super fancy hotel and all expenses paid. You’ll even get to pretend that you’re dating someone as hot as I am” he smirks and you huff out a humorless laugh. “You’ll pay for everything?” he nods “you’ll drive, too? I hate driving” he nods again “and you’ll be nice to me?”
“Ugh, fine, okay. I will be so nice to you that you’ll puke. Is that a yes?”
“Sure, why not. Can I talk in a British accent and pretend to be part of the royal family? ya know, to fit in with the rich people?”
“Absolutely not”
“Why are you no fun, Stevie?” you whine. “Stevie?” his brows furrow. “yeah, i’m thinking that as your new girlfriend, my nickname for you is Stevie”
“Fake girlfriend” he reminds you “Stevie, you’re so uptight.” you pout at him and he hates himself for his eyes lingering on your lips.
“So, what time should I come over tomorrow?” you ask like you’ve already been invited to his apartment. “What?”
“We need to hang out so you can get used to not acting like I don’t have the plague. Plus, we need to get to know each other” you state. “Fine. Come over tomorrow night and we’ll go over everything”
“Looking forward to it, Stevie”
_
You knock on Steve’s door at 8 p.m. sharp with a bottle of wine in hand because let’s face it, you’re both going to need it. “Hi, Steviekins” you greet as he opens the door. “That’s worse than Stevie”
“You love Stevie and you know it”
“Just come inside” he grumbles. “I ordered a pizza if you want a slice. It’s in the kitchen”
Once the wine is poured and you sit on the couch to eat, you pull out your notebook and two pens from your bag. “Are we writing each other love notes or something?”
“No, doofus. We’re taking notes on each other. Our likes, dislikes, details about our relationship” you tear out a piece of paper and give him a pen. Even your pens and notebook were nauseatingly adorable. “If I knew this was going to be like school I would’ve asked Robin”
“ha!” you laugh loudly “she would punch you if you tried to hold her hand or do anything that was even remotely romantic” you point out “and you’re not going to punch me?”
“I’d like to say no, but I’d hate to be a liar”
You and Steve practically chug your wine and pour a second glass before playing your own version of twenty questions.
“What’s your favorite color?” you ask to start. “My favorite color? you really think my family is going to question you on shit like that?” he responds and you glare at him. “Okay, fine. um, blue, I guess”
“That’s so basic”
“Then what’s yours?”
“all of them” you reply. “all of them? really?” he snidely remarks. “yes, moving on”
You learn an abundant amount of things about each other, much against Steve’s will. You know each other's favorite candies, movies, songs, all the way to childhood memories and discussing scars you have and how you got them.
Then you moved on to the details of your relationship. Friends first, fell in love, you know the deal. You’ve “been together” for five months. Long enough that it’s somewhat serious, short enough for it to make sense that you haven’t met his parents yet.
The bottle of wine is almost gone and Steve’s cheeks are flushed and his eyes are a bit glossy. If he wasn’t the bane of your existence, you might even think he looks pretty.
“Can I ask you a question? and not one about your favorite food or anything like that” you ask in a soft voice and you seem a little nervous. “Sure, go ahead.”
“Why did you ask me to do this? i’m like the last person you should’ve asked”
“That’s actually why I asked. If I asked a girl that has any romantic interest in me at all, then it might get confusing, ya know? With you, once these three days are over we can go back to normal. There’s no risk of us falling for each other”
“Oh, I guess that makes sense. I have an observation, by the way. You always speak of love like it’s a terrible thing. Why is that”
“Holy shit that’s a loaded question. Um, well the first time I was in love was in high school and we all know how that turned out. Haven’t been in a serious relationship since so I guess it’s hard for me to believe that it’s as great as everyone says it is” he sighs. He’s never drinking wine again. If it makes him this vulnerable with you he can’t imagine what it would be like if someone else was sitting here.
“Do you still love her? Nancy?” you wonder. “No, I don’t. I have love for her, but just as a friend. What about you?”
“No, I’m not in love with Nancy. She’s pretty and all, but can’t say i’m in love with her”
“Shut up, you know what I mean. You’re always raving about some dumb romance novel, yet I’ve never seen you with a boyfriend.” he says and you sigh “There’s not much to tell. Hopeless romantic with standards that are too high”
There’s a hint of sadness in your voice and you clear your throat before speaking up again. “So, I think that’s enough for tonight. I know way more about you than I ever wanted to”
“Right back at ya. I’ll walk you to the door”
“It’s a short distance, I’ll manage”
“Hey, I gotta start working on being chivalrous as your fake boyfriend. Can you stop being stubborn for one second?”
He walks you ten steps to the door and even opens it for you. “Same time tomorrow night? unless you're busy” you say, halfway out the door. “What could we possibly have left to learn about each other?”
“We still have to work on acting like we’re in love. You might have to put your arm around me this weekend. Oh, the horrors!” you gasp dramatically and he suppresses a laugh because he refuses to let you think you have the ability to make him laugh.
“Tomorrow's fine. But if something comes up and you have to skip that would totally be okay”
“You’re such an ass” you whine. “Not as much as you are” he retorts.
You flip him off as you walk away and he does the same.
He can’t wait for next weekend to be over so he can go back to pretending like you barely even exist.
-
part two coming soon to a screen near you ;)
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1K notes · View notes
hugshughes · 1 year
Text
mirrorball M. Estapa
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Mark Estapa x fem!reader
synopsis - You realize Mark Estapa is the one person you don't have to perform for.
wc - 4.8k (#proud)
contains - cursing, slight miscommunication, upset reader, frustrated reader, fluff asf, kissing, cuddling. as always lmk!
an - LIGHTLY EDITED!!! sorry if there's any mistakes! THIS ONE WAS FUNNNNNN. i love mark so much so this was cute. it does take a long time to get to the point though so.. sorry! this song is also everything to me so yeah! oh also, betty love interest has been determined!!!! connor bedard is like honestly the perfect guy for it i feel like, cause he's young and stuff. and JH86 already has illicit affairs sooooo don't be mad at me! i hope you LOVE this! as always reblogs and replies are very much appreciated!
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i want you to know, i'm a mirrorball. i'll show you every version of yourself tonight.
You'd always been somewhat of a people pleaser. Your happiness had almost always stemmed from whether or not the people around you were happy. It started when you were little, because of how your parents would praise you when you'd take care of your 3 little siblings for them.
Your parents were always working, trying to make enough so that your family could live comfortably, but it had you parenting your siblings for all of your childhood. All of your nurturing at home caused you to do that to everyone you cared about. Always being called the "mom of the friend group." You would do anything you could for people around you to be happy with you, no matter if it meant you were miserable or not.
Now that you were in college, you felt weird not having someone depend on you every second like you do back at home. You had a lot of friends in school now, and lots of people liked that you would never say no to them, taking advantage of your kindness.
You'd met Ethan Edwards in a business class freshman year and he immediately took you in and brought you everywhere. He thought you were cool and fun and one of the few girls he could be friends with that didn't make it weird because of his "status" on the campus. He'd brought you to a hockey house party sophomore year and it's where you met Mark Estapa.
i'll get you out on the floor, shimmering beautiful. and when i break, it's in a million pieces.
Mark had been enthralled by you when you met. Your caring nature and kindness absolutely melted him. He watched you be the designated driver everywhere you went, take care of all of your girlfriends when they got plastered, and in his opinion, let them walk all over you. See, he loved your caring nature, to an extent. He loved how sweet you are, but he hated how other people took such an advantage of it. Once he'd even told your friend to fuck off when he'd seen her trying to make you feel bad for something that was completely on her.
hush, when no one is around my dear. you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my, highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.
While Mark loved how nurturing you were, he loved even more when you weren't so tense, and taking care of everyone, and you were just carefree. The first time he'd ever seen you like this was in February of your sophomore year, six months after he met you. You guys were at a party, that was really a "hangout" but while you guys drank, where none of those friends of yours had been invited. He'd never seen you that happy.
You were sitting right by him on the couch, your Ugg slippers on the rug in front of you while you tucked your legs into your chest, a drink in your hand. You were laughing and making jokes, not having to stress over whether your "friends" were about to get drugged because they would just grab drinks from anyone offering.
You'd always admired Mark. Since the night you met him, you just loved everything he did. How gentle he was even though his hockey stats would say otherwise. You loved how he always seemed to have a smile on his face, and how much he cared for you. He was one of the first people ever who cared for you the way you cared for everyone else.
hush, i know they said the end is near. but i'm still on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.
You had been in love with him since June. Your friend group had gotten together in the summer and spent a weekend on a lake in Michigan, near where Mark's parents lived. One night his parents had invited your group to his childhood home to have dinner and when you'd seen his interactions with his parents, you were a puddle. He was the sweetest guy you'd ever met, but you were convinced you couldn't have him. And he thought the same things about you, sadly enough.
Unknowingly to you, Mark had fallen in complete love with you the same exact day. When he watched you help his mom out with dinner then again afterwards with dishes his heart pounded. Ethan was teasing him all night. Ethan had done everything but tell you guys that you liked the other to try to get you together, sending you two out on drives to get something for a party, making you two a team during every game on the PlayStation, encouraging you guys to enroll in the same classes for junior year, and more.
You hadn't seen Mark all summer after the trip in late June, you'd texted a lot though. He'd even called you a couple of times, which always made you scared because no one had ever just called you to talk to you like he did.
No matter how much Ethan pressured you to tell Mark how you felt, you were always too scared. You'd only ever had two boyfriends before, and they were not good guys, so you didn't really know what it felt like when a guy really loved you.
It was two weeks into the school year and you still hadn't seen Ethan or Mark yet. You were lying in your bed with your eyes closed after class when your phone rang, you jumped, grabbing your phone, seeing 'Mark Estapa🤍" at the top of your screen. You tensed for a second, sliding your finger across your screen to answer and hitting the speaker button.
"Hello?"
Mark smiled when he heard your voice, blush dusting the tips of his ears.
"Hey! What's up? Do you have plans for tonight?"
"No, should I? Is there an Alpha Phi party Ethe didn't tell me about?"
You sat up in your bed, rubbing your eyes and flattening your hair.
"No, no party. I wanted to ask if you maybe want to go get dinner or something, maybe we could go walk around target or something."
You blushed at his proposal, you knew it was just a hangout, but dinner with Mark was like, all you ever wanted. You accepted gently, not trying to sound desperate to see him.
"Okay, great. Can I come pick you up in like 20?"
You accepted again, quickly saying goodbye and texting Mark your new address so you could get ready. You'd just moved off campus and into an apartment for your junior year. It was 50° and felt like 45° in Ann Arbor, perfect fall weather, so you made sure to wear warm clothes.
You slipped on your Ugg slippers right when Mark knocked on your door. You opened the door with a big smile, Mark's face adorned by his usual grin.
"Hi Mark, oh my gosh I haven't seen you in forever!"
You were gonna use that as your excuse to hug him. He greeted you sweetly, squeezing you tightly. When you both pulled away from each other you admired his face, his rosy cheeks from the cold weather, how comfy and warm he looked in his big Wolverine Hockey sweatshirt, everything.
You guys exited your apartment building silently, when you got to Mark's car he went up ahead of you and opened the door for you. You looked up at him and smiled sweetly.
"My hero."
He nodded and laughed, making sure you were securely in the car before closing your door, running around the front of the car to get in. You turned on your seat warmer while he buckled up, he looked over at you and smiled again, and you raised your eyebrows at him, silently asking him 'what??' he just laughed and shook his head.
You plugged your phone into the car so you could play music, Mark didn't fight you over it, he never did. He loved watching you lip-sync to the music you loved, even though you didn't think he saw you. He smiled as he glanced over to you while stopped at a red light, the red illuminating your face as you sang silently along with Bad Habit by Steve Lacy. He thought the song choice was funny because he literally did wish you knew he wanted you.
This was the you that he loved, the girl who wasn't constantly stressed over people who didn't deserve even half a second of her attention. He snapped out of his trance on you when the light on your face turned green. He drove to your guys' favorite place to eat fast.
You were quickly texting your mom back when you pulled up to the restaurant. Mark hopped out of the car with haste and got around the car before you could get your seatbelt off, opening your door for you, holding out a hand so you could balance.
Your cheeks warmed as you accepted his hand, letting him help pull you out of his warm car, and into the cold of Ann Arbor. You both ran across the parking lot to get away from the cold, Mark running around you once you'd crossed the street so he could open the door for you. He was the sweetest guy you'd ever met. You guys greeted the staff that knew you two well as the "friends" that come in every week together.
Your favorite waitress brought you to your usual booth, taking your drink orders then taking off. Said waitress was the same woman that always would tell you and Mark that you guys were perfect for each other when one of you was in the bathroom and the other was left at the table. You and Mark had both sat on the same side of the booth always, you guys just liked it better that way, and it was always both of yours' side when you came with other people.
Taylor Swift was playing lowly through the restaurant while you guys pretended to look through the menus, acting like you didn't get the same thing every time.
After you guys ordered, you started talking about summer, and what you guys had done since June 27th, when you'd seen each other last. You told Mark how you spent July with your family and then August with your friends in Miami.
i want you to know, i'm a mirrorball. i'll can change everything, about me to fit in.
"-but you know partying is never that fun with that group of girls because I always am the DD and they all always get absolutely blackout plastered and none of them are good drunks and it just-"
"You know I hate when you do that?"
You halted, staring at him with furrowed eyebrows. You were shocked, did you make Mark upset? You didn't think you'd said anything bad. You couldn't even get a 'what?' in before Mark started again.
"When you let those girls walk all over you. You don't deserve to go out with them just to take care of them while they do whatever they want all night. It just makes me like sad to see you literally hate every time you go out with them. You don't always have to take care of everyone. You can let people do things for you, and let people do things for themselves, okay? You can do something for yourself for once."
you are not like the regulars. the masquerade revelers. drunk as they watch my shattered edges glisten.
You were stunned. You'd never had anyone care about you like that before, you'd always felt like you had to let everyone depend on you since you were so little. You'd never had a Mark before. Someone who'd let you be you, someone who wouldn't let you go out of your way and hurt yourself to make sure other people are happy.
You didn't know what to say, you hugged him, though. You hugged him tighter than you ever had. And he held you so gently as if you would break. You didn't even know you were tearing up until your vision clouded over.
"Thank you, Mark. I just- I've been taking care of everyone around me since I can even remember. My little brothers and sister were always my responsibility when I was little and it just stuck and now I feel bad if I don't do anything I can to make the people I love happy. But thank you, um wow yeah thank you, Mark."
You both pulled away, he nodded with a straight face. You quickly wiped under your eyes and turned back to the table, you didn't know what to do now.
"Sorry if I just like, made that awkward, but I just really care about you and I don't like when you're with those girls 'cause they don't make you happy."
I love you. I love you. I love you.
That's what Mark wishes he could say.
hush, when no one is around my dear. you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my, highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.
"You didn't, it's not awkward Mark."
You giggled and shook your head at him, asking him how his summer went in turn. He went on about all his plans and it just mesmerized you. The way he talked was everything to you, how excited he got over little things, how enthusiastic he was about almost everything. You loved how bright he was while also being able to understand you and be serious.
You guys got your food and ate while talking about more random things. Mark got up and went to the bathroom right after you both finished, while you sat and waited on him and the check. Mark walked back from the bathroom minutes later and when he got to the booth he held out his hand to help you out of it.
"Mark the check didn't come yet. We can't leave."
He smile got bigger, you could already tell what he was about to say.
"Well I just paid so I think we're fine."
You rolled your eyes at him, lightly pushing him after you accepted his help out of the booth, telling him you’re paying him back somehow. When you got into the car you checked the time, 8:13 p.m. Target closed at 10, so you decided to drive over to it and check it out.
hush, i know they said the end is near. but i'm still on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.
You played more music in the car, and at every red light Mark would watch you sing along silently, and whenever you were driving, you'd glance over at Mark, admiring the slope of his nose and his sharp jawline. He was beautiful, to say the least, but staring at him while Ceyando by Frank Ocean played in the background was breathtaking.
You guys stopped at a red light, and then Mark's eyes met yours. You quickly looked away, staring straight ahead at the road in front of you guys. If the red light wasn't shining down on you guys, Mark would've seen the way you blushed. You were everything to him, everything.
and they called off the circus, burned the disco down. when they sent home the horses, and the rodeo clowns. i'm still on that tightrope. i'm still trying everything, to get you laughin' at me.
When you got to Target, Mark opened your door like always. You guys rush inside to fight the cold weather, giggling like little kids. Before you guys start looking around, Mark goes to the bathroom, claiming how he didn't actually get to go at the restaurant.
While he was away, you ordered Starbucks for the two of you, happy that you were partially repaying him for dinner. You waited outside the bathrooms with two hot chocolates in your hand and a big smile on your face. Mark as always, argues with you when you hand him the drink. You ignore him and grab a cart.
You push the cart through the store, both of your cups taking space in the cupholders on the cart. You both throw in random things you need for your homes, from paper towels to shampoo to Gatorade. You gasp with excitement when you see the books and music section, your favorite part of the whole store. You abandon the cart with Mark, running over to the vinyl.
Now that you had your own apartment, you could finally bring your record player from home and have room with it.
"When was the last time you listened to something on vinyl?"
Mark teased you but admired you also as you scoured the shelves of vinyl, gasping at every Taylor Swift or Harry Styles album.
"Well actually Estapa, my new apartment has enough room for my record player now so I listened to one like two days ago!"
He nodded with an amused look, letting out an 'Oh yeah?' to which to nodded aggressively.
Mark saw the way your movements halted when your eyes landed on one vinyl that was at the very back of the stack. Mark recognized it to be a Taylor Swift album, because you had played it in his car before, but he wasn't exactly sure what it was called.
"Oh my god. This is the Folklore Deluxe album, the red pressing. This is so weird, I left this at home for my little sister to have before school started. I haven't seen this album in Target in like over a year."
Mark nodded along with your words, a big smile on his face as he watched how excited you were.
"Oh my gosh I need to play this for you. Okay, on the way home we're listening to the whole thing okay?"
"Yeah, alright, we'll listen to it."
You squealed, giggling as you slid the vinyl into the cart. Mark pushed the cart behind you as you looked through the books, grabbing two that had been on your 'tbr' list for a while.
Mark let his thoughts wander into delusion as he pushed the cart behind you. He thought about grocery shopping with you like you were married. He shocked himself with that thought, quickly shaking it from his head. He hadn't even told you he liked you yet.
You two went to the self-checkouts, splitting your items up and paying. Mark pushed the cart behind you as you exited Target, while you jogged to the car, the cold air seeping into your jacket. You jumped up and down slightly as Mark took as long as possible to get to the car.
You guys quickly loaded the bags into his trunk, and you insisted on pushing the cart back to the cart corral. When you walked back to the car, a crazy thought appeared in your mind. You thought about being married to Mark and loading your shared groceries into your shared car. Lord, you hadn't even told him you liked him yet.
You got back to the car to see your door open and waiting for you. When you got in, the heater in your seat and pushing through the vents enveloped you. Mark smiled, holding up the aux cord for you. You grinned back, snatching it from him and pulling up Spotify, clicking on folklore (deluxe version).
"Okay so, the album starts with 'the 1', and it's about like thinking about your ex that you thought was your soulmate and wishing they were just a little different so that it could've worked out."
"Oh okay, I think you've played this one before."
You nodded as the song faded in, letting him listen to the song. Mark especially loved when you played Taylor Swift, because you always lip sync the "hardest" to her. 'my tears ricochet' faded out when you pulled up to your apartment.
"Oh my gosh, Mark you have to come in and let me play the rest for you. Please? You're gonna love it I promise. Oh, and we can make those cookies we picked out!"
Mark didn't even have to think for two seconds before agreeing, not that he could ever say no to you. The idea of spending the rest of the night with you sounded like heaven. You had Mark park in a visitor spot and you both got out of the car, grabbing your bags from the back. Mark insisted on carrying 4/5 of your bags, even when you argued with him. You led him up and into your apartment. You both took your shoes off by your door, dropping your bags on the kitchen counter.
and i'm still a believer, but i don't know why. i've never been a natural, all i do is try, try, try.
"Sorry it's a little disorganized, I'm still in the rearranging everything stage."
Mark walked in and immediately loved the vibe of your apartment. It was so warm and it smelled good and just was so you.
"I think it looks great, don't worry."
You blushed at that, feeling all giddy over a boy liking the way you had your apartment decorated. You started to put away your perishable groceries but then noticed Mark standing awkwardly on the other side of your kitchen.
"Oh sorry Mark, please make yourself at home!"
He smiled and nodded, walking around the counter over to you, asking if you needed any help with groceries. You asked him to preheat the oven, and he immediately agreed. You then heard a confused call of your name.
"Your oven is like a fuckin' spaceship. How do you work this?"
You laughed so loud, Mark loved it. You walked over from where you were putting the Halloween-themed cookie dough on a baking sheet and stood between Mark and your oven. You preheat the oven successfully before turning around to make a snarky comment but then realized your proximity. Both of your faces warmed before Mark backed away, rubbing the back of his neck with a smile.
It was a little awkward for a beat before you remembered what you invited him in for.
"Oh my gosh, come over here, look at my record player area! It's my favorite place I have decorated so far."
You grabbed your new vinyl off the counter, sliding on your socks over to where you had your record player set up in your living room. You carefully took the wrap off of your new record, grabbing the first vinyl out and gently placing it on your player. You moved the needle to where track 6 started and turned it on, letting the needle drop onto the vinyl.
"This one is my favorite on folklore, it's about like being a people pleaser but also having someone who you don't have to be like that for."
You avoided looking right at Mark when you said it because you realized that's exactly how you felt about him. He was one of the only people that you didn't have to perform for, the one person who preferred when you didn't. What you didn't know was that Mark was smiling so big when you said what the song was about, thinking of you and himself.
You turned up the volume, walking back over to your kitchen to slide the cookies into the oven when the oven beeped, signaling it was finished preheating. You turned and saw Mark standing at your counter, staring right back at you.
"Hmm, oh! You've never been here before, let me give you the tour."
You turned up the record player once again, so you could hear it throughout your space, and led Mark over to the hallway that led to everything else in your apartment.
"So obviously my kitchen and living room, there's a coat closet, but it's pretty much empty still so whatever."
You showed him the bathroom, another closet, laundry room, and then finally you got to your bedroom.
"Okay this is my bedroom, I'm actually like just finishing up with my decorating in here, sorry if it's a little messy."
Mark thought your room looked spotless and beautiful. Everything just screamed you so he loved it. Your salt lamp dimly illuminated your room from your nightstand, the song dancing through the air of your room. Mark looked all around your room before stopping when he saw your photo wall.
There were dozens of photos, Polaroids and printed pictures, photo booth strips, and other mementos from various occasions taped on the wall.
When you saw Mark halted at your wall, you hoped he didn't realize how much of him there was on it. Every picture of you and Mark in existence was printed out and taped to your wall. The ticket stub from when he took you to The Little Mermaid in May. A cut-out drawing he doodled on your page during class once, he was surprisingly good at drawing hockey jerseys.
Mark noticed how often he came up on your wall, then there was one photo that made his eyes widen a little and his heart jump. It was a Polaroid of you and him at a party last year, your arm around his neck as you both smiled widely. That wasn't even the best part to him, the best part was that on the margin underneath the picture, there was just the date, a dash, and then a heart drawn.
He looked over at you and there was a different look in both of your guys' eyes. Some kind of understanding, but still a little bit of fear that your feelings were unrequited. You walked over to Mark, pointing at the photo he had been staring at.
"That's my favorite picture like, ever. That's why it's in the very middle of all of them."
Mark just stared at you, as you stared at the picture. He was so in love with you, it would probably physically hurt him if he held back telling you any longer.
"I think I'm in love with you."
Your eyes widened, head snapping in his direction. You blushed so deep red, that it even spread to your ears. You were stunned, you literally couldn't move your mouth, Mark had just told you exactly what you think every time you look at him. He was in love with you? You would jump up and down in victory, but your downstairs neighbors might not like that. Mark didn't take your silence well, bringing his hand up to rub the back of his neck as he blushed madly.
"Well no I know I am but like it's cool-"
You kissed him, you kissed him. You kissed Mark Estapa after he told you he was in love with you. What fucking universe is this? You kissed him as the bridge of seven played through your home. Your hands framed his face as his hands instinctively held your hips. Butterflies were all either of you felt, whole body tingling and excitement as you kissed each other.
When you pulled away, you were both out of breath, you stared at Mark, so incredibly flustered. Mark took in your rattled appearance and his confidence skyrocketed. He had just got the girl, he was on top of the world.
"So, does that mean like, you like me back or?"
You pushed at his chest, covering your warm face with your hands, hiding your embarrassment and big smile.
"Shut your mouth, but yes."
Mark grinned even wider than he already was, wrapping you up in a hug as august started playing. You both stood there for a minute, taking the moment in. You stood until the timer on the oven went off, indicating your cookies had finished. You pulled out of the hug, taking both of Mark's hands and leading him back to your kitchen, not before he could let out a funny comment.
"I really like this album by the way."
You let out an 'oh yeah?', giggling at his stupidity. You couldn't believe you'd finally gotten him. He was yours, and you could definitely tell that he was the 1.
because i'm a mirrorball. i'm a mirrorball, and i'll show you every version of yourself tonight.
772 notes · View notes
atarathegreat · 5 months
Note
reader plays a prank on her boyfriend (rindou) where she makes her boyfriend believe that she is going to see another boy ;b
Prank Gone Wrong
Rindou was confused. Had she meant to send him such a funky text? Calling him a nickname he hated and saying she would meet him somewhere she knew he would never go to.
"I don't think that text was for you." Ran sighed, getting up and pulling his shoes on. Rindou thought his brother was too quick to jump to conclusions. His girlfriend was a good girl, she was loyal and stayed by his side, there was no way she was hanging out with someone else. Right?
He'd be lying if he said that he wasn't waiting for his brothers' updates. Each hour there was another text that said I got one. Rindou wasn't sure what that meant, but he knew his brother was watching out for him. He trusted you, so he was a little torn about the way this was all going. Especially when he met his brother to find any and all males that had ever been near you in a friendly setting.
"What the hell is this?" Rindou waved at all the boys that were either tied up or knocked out, a select few being cowed in the corner by other Tenjiku members. Ran tapped his baton firmly against his little brothers neck, "Look. Recognize any of them? Each and every one of them has been around Y/n in the last month and a half. So, unless she's met someone new, she's being coy."
"So you kidnapped her acquaintances?" Rindou raised an eyebrow at his brother and the lower members, "How does that even make sense?"
Ran rolled his eyes. "Look, baby brother, I want to make sure she isn't cheating and you want peace of mind that your sweet princess is loyal to you. This is how we do that."
Rindou still wasn't sure how that made sense, but whatever his brother wanted is what they did. If they had time to. Before he could even start digging in, there she was. School uniform perfectly in place on her curves and her hair done the same as any other day but no less pretty. Even her scowl as she chastised the charismatic brothers was gorgeous to Rindou. She was midway through her rant when he couldn't stop himself from grabbing her hand.
"I'm serious, Rin!" She tugged free and moved to help her friends up and out, "You can't go nabbing people over a prank!"
"I didn't do it..."
"You can't have Ran do it, either!"
"I-"
"Stop him next time!" She grabbed his hand once all her friends were safely out, "Do you two have dodo brains? Rocks for synapses? Geezus, Rin!"
Rindou didn't mind walking her home, even if she was in a sour mood. At least he knew it was a prank now. If anything, he felt a little guilty for ruining the fun for her. She probably didn't think it would go that way and was wanting a nice laugh. Instead, he let Ran go out and grab as many third years as he wanted to satisfy his own curiosity.
"Sorry I messed up your prank." Rindou pulled her hand up, kissing the back of it, then all her knuckles.
Even her sighs were heavenly. "I should've known you and Ran would pull some silly stunt like this if I pranked you, so it's my fault."
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icejjfishesz · 7 months
Text
003. ༺RED HANDED༻∘
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a/n: i hate this chapter tbh but i'm excited for the next one 👀
summary: after getting unexpectedly left by your roommate, you find yourself in need of a replacement.
contents: reader is down bad. paige in a situationship. kinda angsty. this chapter is from paige is pov but it's not in first person if that makes sense 😭😭
previous. next. masterlist.
★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ ★
it’s not weird being this attracted to someone in such close proximity to you. is what paige thinks every time she sees you. after your little late night interrogation a week ago, paige has started to see you differently. it’s an almost out of body experience for her considering she’s never allowed herself to stray too far away from olivia. normally, when she starts to develop these minor feelings for another person she’d just distance herself from them…but that’s kind of hard to do when you live with them.
“i swear you’re never paying attention to anything ever…” azzi chuckles in paige’s direction, shaking her head at the confused look paige gives her. paige is sitting on her gaming chair but it’s faced away from her entertainment system, towards the bed where azzi is laying.
“my fault.” paige clears her throat and shakes her head as if she’s trying to shake away her thoughts. thoughts of you. “what were you saying?”
azzi just stares at paige for a few moments before saying. “is it olivia…again?”
she rolls her eyes and grumbles. “the world does not revolve around olivia.” she says it slowly. like if the words left her mouth with enough conviction, even she could believe them. it doesn’t work.
azzi laughs again. “okay, sure, but your world kinda does…i mean, if she asks you to jump you’ll say how high.”
okay, maybe that’s true… it's definitely true. but even then, it wasn’t like paige relies on olivia.
“sometimes it kinda feels like you rely on her.” azzi continues making paige sigh to herself.
about a year ago, paige met olivia at the library. she was the first and only girl she had been with after she realized she also liked girls. at the beginning, all they really did was talk. about anything. everything. paige told her all the things she’d never told anyone before: her insecurities, dreams, feelings about the little things…and olivia always listened. with rapt attention. paige appreciated how it never felt like she judged her for any of the shit she told her, she just listened and understood and that felt like magic. she had been chasing that feeling for months now but to no avail. maybe that’s why she stays. a foolish part of her feeling like eventually she could get that feeling back.
“you’re annoying…” she mumbles and azzi chucks a pillow at her.
“i’m not wrong though…”
paige opens her mouth to reply but pauses when she gets a call. olivia.
azzi snickers again, shrugging as if to say ‘point proven’ when paige immediately picks up the phone. she gives her friend a pointed look as if to say ‘shhh’. putting the phone to her ear, she mumbles hello softly but guarded –– preparing for either apologies aplenty or immediate hostility considering that they haven’t spoken since their argument last week which caused olivia to stomp out of the apartment.
“why haven’t you called me?” olivia mutters dryly on the other line, paige shuts her eyes and sighs. immediate hostility it is.
“i just thought you wanted space…”
“what? so you can spend extra time with your little ‘roommate’? no way.” 
paige practically flinches at the mention of you. unsure of why the very thought of you gives her goosebumps. it felt like time stopped. as if paige had a moment to process not only olivia’s words but her reaction to them. she clears her throat before continuing.
“oh my god, how many times do i have to tell you it’s not like that, liv!” paige begins to get frustrated at the girl on the other line. feeling herself get defensive as soon as she hears how upset olivia is. azzi puts her airpods in as she tries to ignore the impending argument.
“then what is it like?!”
“she’s my roommate.” paige stresses over the phone, groaning as she speaks. ever since olivia found out you liked women, she’s been overly jealous at the amount of time paige spends in your presence. “that’s all.”
“liar.” olivia scoffs, the simple word is spoken gently but it’s duplicitous. the tenderness of it only meant to mask the true emotion behind it in hopes of getting a genuine answer. only meant to hide the anger.
“what — “
“you’re attracted to her.”
that brings paige pause. she didn’t expect olivia to notice. that got her wondering if it was obvious. was olivia just being jealous per usual or did she actually know. could everyone tell? could you?
“oh? nothing to say now?” olivia spits out, venom laced words mumbled bitterly through the phone and bleeding out of the speaker into paige's ear. it’s whiplash. she gives paige fucking whiplash. going from yelling to gentleness to calm to anger.
“liv…” she sighs. “you’re being crazy again.” 
wrong thing to say…
“crazy?!” she shouts again making paige roll her eyes. 
then it stops. all the shouting and the malice. it melts down until all that remains is a monotone voice which scared paige far more than any of the yelling or mood swings ever did. “so you’re denying that you’re attracted to her?”
paige swallows, not wanting to hesitate but not sure of exactly how to respond. the obvious answer was to lie and say no ––– claim that olivia, who didn’t even want to date paige,  was the only one she wanted. but then she let her thoughts slip to images of her telling the truth. saying yes. ending things with olivia. it almost felt too freeing. like discovering uncovered territory, new and open and terrifying. would it make her happier? that question brought paige pause too and that’s what scared her the most. the what if. so no matter how good it might feel to admit the truth…she goes with the safe choice. 
“of course i’m not.” it’s a blatant lie. purely for survival. 
then came the scariest sound paige hears. far worse than the screaming or the monotone: silence. olivia’s silence means…
“you know what? i’m done.” 
“baby, what?” paige rushes out, eyes widening as her heart starts to beat frantically. 
“we’re done.”
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mothdruid · 2 years
Text
Home for the Holidays
pairing: bradley "rooster" bradshaw x reader
summary: Bradley might have lied about having a girlfriend. His best friend, you, decide to help him out and go home for the holidays with him. As the trip unfolds, so does your and Bradley's feelings for one another.
wc: 19.2k
warning: 18+, mdni, fluff, mild angst, smut, slow burn, pet names (babe), fake dating, kissing, unprotected sex, penetrative sex (p in v), oral sex (afab receiving), vaginal fingering, drinking (reader gets drunk), crying, bob being a good friend
a/n: hello! it's finally here!!!! thank you all for being patient with me while i finished this up
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"You did what?" It was shocking, hearing Bradley word vomit every bad decision he made in the past two days. Seeming as how they all included you without your knowledge.
"It was an accident." Bradley said, lips in a slight downturn as he wrapped a hand around the back of his neck. 
"That is not an accident, Bradley. It's a fucking lie." You looked at him in disbelief. This was much much worse than just an accident. You turned and started walking away from him, but alas, he followed you. 
"It's not like you're doing anything for the holidays." Bradley pleaded. 
"You don't know that." You arrived at your office, sitting in your desk chair quickly.  
"Actually, I do ‘cause you told me last week you were planning on staying at home, getting wine drunk while watching Face Off." You glared at him, hating the fact he had such an impeccable memory. Bradley leaned against your desk, staring down at you while adjusting his reading glasses. 
"I'm not your girlfriend though. How will your family feel when they find that out?" Bradley rolled his eyes. He made a wave of his hand in the air.
"They won't find out. Come on, we both took intro to acting in college, it won't be hard to fake it." 
"Bradley, what did you tell them? Like explain it all word for word." 
"Already did tha-"
"No, you word vomited." He huffed this time. 
"Fine. Mav asked me if I was bringing anyone home. I told him I wasn't sure if I was coming home. Amelia then teased me about being alone and maybe my pride got the best of me." It was your turn to let out a huff. 
"That's an understatement." 
"So, then I said that I would be coming home, and bringing my girlfriend." Bradley looked at you with puppy dog eyes.
"Which is apparently me." You crossed your arms over your chest, leaning back into your chair. 
"Yes." A soft smile tugged at the corners of his lips. 
"You owe me a big favor if I do this." Bradley smiled at your reply.
“I’ll do all your extra paperwork for a month.” The offer was tempting, but you knew it wouldn’t fully make up for this. 
It wasn’t that you didn’t know Bradley’s family, or at least what he had left of it. His biological parents had passed away when he was young, leaving his god-parents to take care of him. You had met Pete and Penny during your college graduation. They were extremely kind people, inviting you out for a celebration dinner afterwards. But that was partially why you were nervous, they knew you on a surface level. 
You had never met Amelia, only hearing about her through Bradley and seeing pictures. Bradley adored the girl, talking about her like a sister. Which wasn’t too far off. It was his god-daughter. Reminding you that Bradley’s ‘family’ wasn’t his biological family, not that it made a difference. They treated him as if he was their own, which was all that mattered. 
“Bradley, I’ll have to think about it.” 
After a few days to mull it over you decided to go. Even making a pros and cons list to help you decide. Bradley was ecstatic, sending you back a thumbs up and smiley blushing emoji. He then sent you a longer text explaining the plans for the trip. 
The office would close on the 22nd of December, allowing you guys to fly out on the 23rd. Then you wouldn’t be returning home until December 31st. You two would be flying out to Michigan, the state where Penny and Pete had raised Bradley. Which also happened to be where the two of you attended university together. It was truly a beautiful state, one that you missed a little bit. The winters were something you never fully got used to, but who ever gets used to a winter like that. 
-
The plane ride to Michigan wasn’t bad, only a two hour flight. Bradley picked up a rental car after landing so the two of you would be able to drive wherever. Pete and Penny lived around where ‘up north’ started. It was a smaller town close to the city you two went to university at. So, it was pertinent that the two of you had a car to go places whenever you wanted. The two of you loaded your luggage into the back of the car, silently praising that Bradley was smart enough to get an SUV for the trip. You made sure you grab your blanket out of your bag before settling into the passenger seat. 
“Two hours?” You asked while you placed your blanket over your legs. 
“It’s the same drive from when we were in college.” Bradley stated as he sat in the driver seat, placing the key in the ignition. You adjusted your heating settings, switching your side to max heat while Bradley adjusted his to a low heat. 
“Bradley, it’s been years since I’ve been here.” He relaxed back into the seat, shifting the gear in the center console before leaving the lot. You watched as he smiled and used one hand on the wheel, the other still resting on the gear. 
“This will be a fun refresher trip then.” Bradley said as he looked at you before focusing back on the road. 
“There is a reason why I left Michigan, you too.” White man-made hills of snow were everywhere, reminding you of your university years. The years when you and Bradley became friends. You had thought that moving to Michigan for college wouldn’t be bad, it only being four years. But you were wrong. The winters there were cold and wet, making you a hermit for almost half the year.
“The snow isn’t that bad.” You pulled your black and grey heathered beanie off your head and tossed it on your side of the dashboard. There was an odd flutter when you looked at him, his smile seeming brighter than normal.
“You say that because you grew up here.” You pointed at him, a mocking grimace on your face. Bradley chuckled at your look, swatting your finger away. 
“What? Afraid we might get stuck in the freezing cold?” You pulled the blanket up over your arms and chest, rolling your eyes at his question. “Can you pull up the GPS, maybe connect your phone to the car for music too?” 
“Am I gonna have to take requests?” You raised an eyebrow at him. Bradley’s lips quirked to one side as you started to fiddle with the touch screen in the rental. 
“Honestly, as long as you get the directions pulled up I’ll let you listen to whatever.” Bradley said as he finally made it onto the freeway. A part of you wondered why he even needed the GPS working when it was a straight shot. That was one you enjoyed about Michigan, I-75. The freeway that could take you all the way from Canada to Florida. It was practically the straight shot to anywhere in Michigan, except the western side of the state and most of the upper peninsula. But you indulged him, pulling the GPS up. 
“So, are there any specific plans for the holidays?” You put your music on shuffle, keeping it at a low volume. Bradley shrugged. 
“All I’m really aware of is Christmas Eve and Christmas day. They know we are heading out on New Year’s eve. But we might have a gathering during the week.” You laid your seat back a little bit, getting more comfortable as Bradley stayed focused on the road. 
“I’ll assume that Christmas Eve and Christmas are gonna be with the family. But what are we doing during the week? Besides lounging of course.” There were a few thumps as Bradley hit some classic Michigan potholes. 
“Of course. We are having a little get together.” Bradley muttered. You could tell he was hiding something. 
“Bradley, don’t lie to me anymore.” You squinted at him. Bradley brought a hand to the back of his neck, scratching awkwardly and the crunch of the material of his winter coat drowned out the music. 
“I uh.. I might have agreed to a little college reunion with the gang.” College reunion? With ‘the gang’? That wasn’t what you signed up for. You had signed up for hot cocoa and presents with his family, being awkwardly teased about a relationship that didn’t exist. Faking a relationship in front of their friends wasn’t in the deal. You shot up out of your seat, turning to face him better.
“You what? Bradley! I’m not doing this,” you gestured between the two of you, “in front of them.” Bradley’s face scrunched up as he looked at you. You swatted at his arm, earning a fake yelp from him as he pulled away from you. 
“Hey! I’m driving!” 
“Crash the car now then! They can’t think we are together!” Bradley rolled his eyes. 
“I’m not crashing the car, it’s a rental. Plus, it’s not like Hangman doesn’t already think that.” You let out a huff while the car went over another pothole.
“Jake can’t know about this little deal we have. He’d get off on it too much.” 
“Well, none of them have to know about it. We can keep it a secret.” Another pothole. You turned the music up then curled back up into your seat. You knew that was too hopeful, everyone of your friends would know immediately. Especially Bob and Natasha. Bradley focused back on the road after he made sure you were done arguing. 
He knew why you wouldn’t want the group to think you two were dating, many of them having bet money on your relationship status every year of university. But Jake had always been the most relentless. Bradley decided to push that thought to the back of his mind, focusing on the road while occasionally looking over at your now sleeping form. 
Bradley looked over as you started to rustle, sleep still covering your features. For a split second he smiled, taking in how adorable you looked. Bradley blushed at his own thoughts, focusing back on the road. You rubbed at your eyes, looking around the car and stretching out your arms. Bradley leaned a bit away from you as one of your hands moved into his space while you stretched. 
“Morning sleepyhead.” Bradley said as you sat up and moved your seat back upright. Bradley chuckled when you shot a glare at him. You looked out the window, noticing larger mounds of snow littering the area. There had to be at least a foot of snow in the surrounding area. You grabbed your beanie from the dashboard, putting it back on. You weren’t even outside but you could already feel the lower temperature. 
“How far away are we?” You asked, switching the song.
“GPS says twenty minutes, but I think I can make it in fifteen.” Bradley joked with a wink. You shot him a playful look before checking your phone. There was a text from Bob, making you smile. 
He was still one of you best friends from college, the both of you texting occasionally. You had met him at college, just like the rest of your friend group. Him and Mickey had been the only ones that weren’t so annoying about your relationship with Bradley. It was a short text, but one that had your nose scrunching up.
Bobert: You going home with Brad?
You: yeah, but it isn’t anything like that
You: also don’t call him that, it’s weird
Bobert: says the person who calls him B
The twenty minutes flew by quickly, taking in all of the surroundings outside. Bradley was right when he said it was a small town. You were pretty sure there were only three stop lights in the entire town. The town seemed dead, as most towns did during the winter in Michigan. Most people bundled up inside, drinking hot cocoa, and watching Christmas movies with their families. Or at least that was what you did while you were here. Bundled up in your dorm or apartment, depending on the year, while sipping hot cocoa with an iconic Christmas movie on. Bradley and Jake always teased you about being scrooge, but you couldn’t help that the ‘merry season’ just didn’t bring much merriment for you. 
Bradley turned down streets that you definitely weren’t going to remember, before turning into a driveway of a home. It was an obvious two story home. The outside of the house was covered in mismatching stones, a nice cement porch attached to the front. Dead bushes lined the edge of the driveway next to the house, wrapping around near the porch. There were lights covering and the edges of the roof, currently off due to it being daytime. You could make out small wire frames of a few deer lawn ornaments.
“This your childhood home?” You asked as you undid your seatbelt to get out. Bradley’s mustache twitched, a small curve to his lips. It looked almost like a nostalgic but melancholic look. His hazel eyes were full of emotions when he looked at you. It had been years since Bradley came home for the holidays, mainly spending his holidays alone now. 
“Sure is.” Bradley undid his own seatbelt, opening the driver door and getting out of the car. You quickly followed suit, the both of you heading to get the back of the car to get your luggage. 
A shiver ran through your body as you followed Bradley’s lead, making your way to the side door of the house. All you could think about was getting inside, the warmth of the home calling to you. A part of you was hoping that Penny might already have hot cocoa prepared for you two, even though the chances were low. Bradley knocked on the door, making sure to not hit the wreath hanging on it. Bradley stood on the small set of cement steps towards the door, creating an extremely large height difference. Bradley wiggled his eyebrows playfully as you two waited for someone to answer. 
“Are you sure they are home?” You rocked back and forth lightly, trying to generate some extra warmth. Bradley tilted his head and gave you a weird look. 
“Penny and Mav are retired. Plus, Amelia is on break from school. One of them has to be home.” Bradley stated as he leaned over to try and look in the windows near the door. “Or at least I’m pretty sure someone should be here.” Bradley smiled awkwardly at you before the door swung open. 
“What are you doing here?” A young blonde haired girl said with a glare. 
“Are you home alone?” Bradley questioned. You watched the two of them, taking in their casual conversation. You knew this was Amelia, recognizing some of her features. “You gonna let us in or nah?” Bradley’s question caught your attention. 
“Yeah, please. It’s really cold out here.” You finally spoke up, earning a smile from Amelia. 
“You’re lucky you brought your girlfriend Roo, or else I’d make you sleep in the garage.” Amelia smiled brightly after her words, opening the door and stepping out of the way. There was an odd feeling in your chest, when she called you Bradlye’s girlfriend. You offered an awkward smile to her, not sure if you would ever get used to being called Bradley’s girlfriend. The two of you grabbed your suitcases and made your way inside. It was a relief to feel the heat of the home engulf your body. 
“I’ll remember that when it’s Christmas morning.” Bradley quipped as he took his beanie off, you mimicking his action. Amelia stuck her tongue out, leaving the small foyer-like room. There were pictures of Bradley and Amelia adorning the walls in the foyer with the occasional Christmas decoration of the wall. The ages of them ranged from toddler to Bradley’s university graduation. One picture stood out to you though. It was toddler Bradley with two people you had never met. A gentle and kind looking woman next to a man with a pair of aviator sunglasses on and a goofy smile. The man was holding Bradley on his hip, an outdoor grill obvious in the background. Bradley must have realized you were staring at the picture, him standing a bit closer to you. 
“That’s mom and dad.” You turned to see Bradley merely inches away from your face. A heat you had noticed earlier started to boil under your cheeks. “I’ll tell you more about them later. Let’s get our stuff upstairs.” 
Bradley led the way through the comforting home, more Christmas decorations littering the home the deeper you got. It gave you an immediate sense of security, knowing that nothing wrong could happen here. The walls inside the home were adorned with more family pictures. You saw some of just Mav and Bradley’s dad, even ones of teenage Bradley and his mom. You knew that Bradley had lost his parents from a car accident, just had never seen what they looked like. The two of you made your way up the wrapping staircase. 
“So, we are sharing a room.” Bradley said as you made your way down the hallway. 
“We are what now?” Bradley opened the door to what you assumed was his old bedroom. It was more of a spare room now though, no old traces of Bradley lingering in it. There was only one bed. Of course there was only one bed. 
“That’s fine, but only one bed?” You questioned. Bradley scooted his suitcase to the side of the room, offering you a smile. 
“I’ll sleep on the floor, I promise.” 
“Good, cause I’m not sharing.” You playfully elbowed his arm, smirking when he made an over exaggerated yelp.  
After getting your suitcases sorted and unpacked you made your way downstairs. You found Amelia sitting in the living room, some type of docu-series on the tv. You sat on the couch opposite of her, checking your phone. Not only did you have a text from Bob, but one from Mickey now too. 
Bobert: (; sure it ain’t 
Mickey: how am i finding out from bob you’re with rooster for the holidays????
You rolled your eyes, deciding that neither of them deserved a response. You looked up from your phone, meeting Amelia’s gaze. You offered a small wave to her, not sure how to start a conversation with her. 
“So, have you two always been together?” Amelia crossed her arms and sunk further into the couch. Your eyebrows knitted together. 
“No? Why wou-” 
“You two went to CMU together, right?” You nodded. “And were you dating then?” 
“No, why are you-” 
“Hey!” Bradley interrupted you, coming into the living room and sitting next to you. He wrapped an arm behind you, pressing his body closely to yours. You could feel a small flutter in your stomach, something you had vaguely felt before. Especially with Bradley. 
Being this close with Bradley wasn’t unfamiliar, it was something you enjoyed from time to time. It was just nice to have someone there occasionally, that someone being Bradley. But this was different. You two were technically boyfriend and girlfriend right now. A couple. It made you feel something weird, something you couldn’t pinpoint exactly. All you knew was that it made your body act differently. A warmth was blossoming behind your cheeks, heart fluttering from his looks and smiles, hands developing a clamminess. 
“What are the two of you talking about?” Bradley asked with a big smile, his arm pulling you a little more snug into him. 
“You.” Amelia said with a playful glare. It was Bradley’s turn to poke his tongue out at her. The two of them started to talk while you watched them. If you hadn’t known Bradley for years, you would have thought this was his sibling. Amelia was that of sorts, even if she was about thirteen years younger than him. Bradley was an only child, but the conversation you were witnessing made you question that fact. 
“Well what about me?” Bradley asked. 
“That you should shave your mustache.” Amelia quipped. You couldn’t hide your giggle, only to be met with an offended look from Bradley. 
“There’s no way. You love my mustache don’t you, babe?” The heat flooded your cheeks once more. 
“I-I mean, I forgot what you look like without it. You’ve had it for years.” 
“You can be honest. It looks bad.” Amelia harped from her side of the living room. Bradley went to say something, stopping when he heard the door open. Amelia shot Bradley a playful look, getting up and running over to the kitchen. Suddenly you could feel Bradley’s breath on your cheek and neck, making your heartbeat pick up. 
“Sorry about all of this.” Bradley gestured to where the two of your bodies were pressed together. You turned to look at him, your eyes locking with his hazel ones. There were only a few mere inches between the two of you. “Gotta sell the part, ya know?” 
“No, no, I totally get it.” You patted at the top of his thigh, rubbing your hand lightly on his jean clad thigh. Your eyes flicked to his lips then to his eyes again. It was like something clicked in your brain, you immediately looked away from him making a small cough-like noise. “Sorry, scratch in my throat.”
Without warning Mav walked in, causing Bradley to stand up and separate from you. It was the most miniscule thing, but you were relieved. You gave Mav a smile, waving at Penny as she came around. Even though you felt welcome, all you could think about was the flight back home. 
-
“No, Bob!” You whispered on the phone. “He was like inches away, like if either of us were bumped, there would have been lip to lip contact.” You heard a small snicker. “What are you laughing about?” 
“About you coming to your senses.” You rolled your eyes, sitting down on the bed you’d be sleeping in later. 
“There aren't any ‘senses’ for me to come to.” What the fuck was Bob talking about anyway? 
“Sure there aren’t. But if you don’t see it, I’m not gonna tell you.” Bob’s shit eating grin could be heard through the phone. 
“Good, ‘cause there is nothing to be seen.” You were about to continue the conversation before Bradley walked into the room, closing the door behind him. He wore an old marron Central Michigan University t-shirt, gray sweatpants, towel still in hand, hair wet. Something inside of you lurched seeing Bradley like this, seeing him so casual and domestic. It wasn’t like how you used to see him in college, there was something different now. 
“I gotta let you go, Bob. I’ll text you.”  There was a small silence between you and Bradley before he spoke. 
“How’s Bob?” Bradley asked, gathering the extra blankets he found earlier. He laid a comforter down on the floor next to the bed. You pulled your legs up onto the bed, trying to keep them out of his way while he assembled his makeshift bed. You grabbed one of the pillows from the head of the bed and plopped it down on his comforter. 
“Bob is, Bob is fine.” Bradley got down on his knees, rolling out the blankets and fluffing the pillow you tossed down. Another silence. 
“Hey, I… I’m sorry about earlier and dinner. If I’m being a bit too much,” he looked up at you, “just let me know. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” A sincere look was on his features.
“Bradley..”
“I just need this holiday to go well, okay?” A small amount of emotion had slipped into Bradley’s sincere look. 
“Bradley, what is this really about?” Bradley looked away from you. 
“I know you don’t want to be here, but please. I need to show Mav that I’m doing well.” You watched Bradley with a smile as he started talking with his hands. It was kind of cute, something he did when he got nervous. “He keeps harping on me and I just-” You took his hands in yours, stopping the movements. Bradley finally looked back up at you, making you smile. 
“Why didn’t you just tell me this when you asked me?” You thought about dinner, how Mav kept asking questions. When did you two officially get together? When are you gonna move in together? Did you always like each other? Any thoughts about marriage? 
“I didn’t want you to feel pressured about the entire thing. Like if you didn’t want to come, you didn’t have to. Mav is just a little overbearing, and has been since my parents passed. He just-” 
“Bradley,” he stopped his rambling, “I’m your friend, okay? Friends help friends. And that unfortunately means maybe pretending to be your friend's girlfriend to make it seem like he is doing good in life with his god-father.” Bradley’s lips cracked into a smile at your words. 
“Thanks. I knew there was a reason why I call you my best friend.” A small flutter in your chest was noticeable as you smiled back at him. 
“You’re gonna owe me so much take-out and coffee after this.” 
-
It was Christmas Eve and all five of you were in the living room. It was apparently tradition for Bradley and his family to watch Space-Balls on Christmas Eve, followed by some assortment of Christmas movies afterwards. Pete and Penny were on one couch, Penny curled up under Pete’s arm. Amelia was curled up on a recliner, bundled up with a fleece blanket. Then there was you and Bradley. Bradley sat at one end of the couch, you laid out at the other end with your legs stretching out. Your feet were currently set on Bradley’s lap, one of his hands rested on your shin while the other was curled around the heel of one foot. 
Everyone was focused on the movie, laughing at the jokes they had laughed at before. But you weren’t focused on the movie. Yes, it was one of your favorites. How could it not be, seeing Bill Pullman pull out such a stellar comedy performance. But alas, you were focused on your best friend. 
After your conversation last night, it was easier. All of it. The small touches of Bradley’s fingertips or hands, the invasion of your ‘bubble’ became more bearable too. Even the small things your body was doing. Everytime Bradley laughed it warmed you, making you forget about the ten degree weather outside. The way your heart fluttered when he looked at you, it was oddly exciting. Has that always happened when he looked at you? 
You felt a squeeze on your heel, pulling you out of your thoughts. Bradley was giving you a questioning look, silently asking if you were okay with another squeeze of your heel. After giving him a soft smile and nod he turned back to the movie. Bradley had always been a type of comfort to you, but this was a different kind of comfort he was providing now. The movie played on, earning a few giggles and chuckles from you and the others. It wasn’t until the end of the movie any of you noticed the new snowflakes flurrying beyond the window pane. 
“Fresh snow!” Amelia shouted, whipping around in the recliner to look out the window behind her. You sat up a little bit, pulling the blanket on your lap up around you while inching closer to Bradley.
“Wonder how long it’s been snowing.” Bradley whispered as you leaned into him. The blanket you had was warm, but you wanted more warmth. You silently thanked whatever higher power for making Bradley a walking furnace. 
“Not sure.” Bradley wrapped an arm around you, pulling you tighter into him. You looked across the living room, catching a look from Mav. There was this look of adoration in his eyes as he watched you and Bradley. A small pang of guilt struck you, feeling bad about fooling him. But if this was what Bradley wanted, you would help. You weren’t going to be around when it blew up anyways, when Bradley had to explain why you had ‘broken up’ or that it was all fake. 
“Let’s go outside! Make a snowman or something!” Amelia turned back around and sat up. 
“I don’t know about that one.” Penny said, sitting up on the couch. “It’s pretty cold outside.” 
“We will wear our coats, hats and gloves. Promise.” Amelia held out her pinky to her mother, signaling a pinky promise. Mav chuckled at her before speaking. 
“And who is we?” Amelia shrugged at Mav’s question. 
“Me and Bradley.” It was Bradley’s turn to sit up straight, making you sit up straight. 
“Hey, I didn’t agree to that.” Bradley said, his arms still around you. 
“Please?” Amelia asked, putting on her best puppy dog eyes. Bradley rolled his eyes.
“Fine but only if she comes out too.” Bradley smirked as he gestured to you. You sat back from him, giving him an astonished look. 
“If I-”
“Pretty please. I wanna go do snow angels, but I don’t wanna go alone.” Amelia interrupted you, now giving you puppy dog eyes. You didn’t want to ruin her mood. 
“Only if I get to pick the next Christmas movie.” Everyone agreed to let you pick the next Christmas movie. You, Bradley, and Amelia hunted down your winter gear. Bradley made sure to tie your boots tight for you, knowing that you didn’t want to risk getting snow in them. Amelia grabbed your arm, tugging you down for her to whisper something. 
“Let’s pelt him with snowballs.” 
The three of you went outside, hats pulled down and far as possible. Amelia ran through the snow coating the driveway, missing the cars as she made her way to the front yard. You and Bradley walked to the yard, seeing Amelia with her arms out and wide, twirling as she caught snowflakes with her tongue. It made you smile, seeing her enjoy the very essence of what winter was. Bradley watched you, taking in your expression. He felt something blossom inside of him, not being able to place what it was exactly. 
“Ready for snow angels?” You joked, elbowing him lightly. Bradley smiled at you, before nodding and leading the way. Penny and Pete watched your snow angel joy turn into a snowball fight, you and Amelia teaming up against Bradley. 
“They’re cute.” Penny said as she watched Bradley fall down as Amelia tackled him into the snow. All Mav could do was nod, smiling as he watched the three of you. He had never seen Bradley so happy, let alone so happy with another person. 
-
“The, the, the, the Grinch!” Bradley mocked, repeating the line of your favorite Christmas movie as you two made it up the stairs. After coming back inside from a thorough snowball fight, you forced everyone to sit through the live-action Grinch. 
It was late now, the two of you making your way up to your shared room. Bradley shot you a pair of finger guns before gathering his clothes, heading into the bathroom. It was his way of giving you privacy while changing. The both of you hoped that Amelia never saw it, not wanting her to catch on to your charade. You slipped into your sleepwear, your own Central Michigan University t-shirt and sweatpants. You checked your phone after you set your dirty clothes in the clothes basket. There were a few messages from your dagger squad group chat and a few from Bob. 
Dagger Squad, Nat: Midland Street? Right? 
Dagger Squad, Jakey: i mean, fricks is an option
Dagger Squad, Javs: only saying fricks cause you live there
Dagger Squad, Jakey: sue me
Dagger Squad, BradBrad: Either spot, can’t be out late. Have to drive afterwards
You squinted at the time of Bradley’s message, seeing it was only from a few minutes ago. You typed out a small reply to the group chat, explaining you also had a drive before looking at Bob’s texts. 
Bobert: How’s the trip? 
Bobert: You’re not mad about our convo, right? 
Bobert: Sorry if I was out of line. 
Bobert: Y’all coming to the get together? 
You thought Bradley had told everyone you two would be there. 
You: yeah, just have to drive afterwards. and no, i’m not mad, just had to watch a lot of christmas movies and beat bradley’s ass in a snowball fight 
A beat barely passed when a notification dropped down, a text to the group chat from Jake. 
Dagger Squad, Jakey: just one of you lovebirds dd, i got a spare room if you need it (;
You rolled your eyes, just in time for Bradley to walk in the room. He had his phone in hand, staring at the screen as he closed the door. He turned to look at you, holding his phone out for you to see the screen. The group chat was pulled up on his screen. 
“Are you seeing this?” You held up your phone, showing him the group chat on your screen. 
“Grade-A asshole.” You joked about Jake. You climbed into bed, curling up under the plush comforter. You scooted to the edge, looking at Bradley as he settled onto his makeshift bed. 
“Sometimes I wonder why we are friends with him.” Bradley stated, plugging his charger into the phone and setting it on the nightstand. He picked up your charger cord, handing it to you for you to plug your phone in.
“It’s crazy how any of us are friends.” You said while plugging  your phone in. 
“How so?” Bradley asked, looking up at you from the floor. Your heart swelled as you looked at him, his honey locks disheveled against the pillow. There was a tiredness that was settling on his features, one that was most likely settling onto yours too. 
“I mean, aside from us, we all have different majors. It’s kind of surprising we all managed to stay friends after pre-req years.” Bradley shrugged. He tried hard not to smile as he stared up at you, your cute peeking form over the edge of the bed. The two of you just stared at each other for a moment before you spoke up again. 
“Should we set an alarm for the morning? Don’t wanna miss any presents.” Bradley shook his head no. 
“I promise you, they won’t open anything before we get down there.” You rolled back onto the bed completely, rolling onto your side. 
“Goodnight, Bradley.”
“Goodnight, babe.” 
-
The two of you were awoken by Penny knocking on your door. After confirmation the two of you were awake she told the two of you to be downstairs in ten minutes. Bradley groaned as he rolled onto his side. You checked your phone, seeing a text from Mickey, Bob, and the dagger squad group chat. You looked at the time, 9:25am, then decided to ignore the texts. Those were a future you problem. Without warning Bradley stood up, not facing you and leaving the room. 
It was odd, he at least told you good morning yesterday before heading to the bathroom. You changed into an old university sweater, waiting for Bradley to return. After a few minutes you decided to head down alone, knowing Bradley would be close to follow. 
The smell of cinnamon rolls flooded your senses, making you smile. You saw Penny and Amelia in the kitchen, talking about something while preparing the cinnamon rolls. You made your way to the first floor bathroom, deciding to use it before interacting for the day. After using the bathroom you made your way to the living room. Pete smiled at you once he saw you. 
“Merry Christmas!” Mav greeted you before frowning. “Where’s Bradley?” You shrugged. 
“Went to the bathroom in a hurry and I haven’t seen him since.” Mav nodded, a weird half frown half smirk on his lips. You went to question the look before Bradley walked into the living room. His cheeks had a rosy tint to them, making you question why he left for the bathroom even more. 
“Morning.” You greeted as he sat next to you. Bradley smiled and just nodded to you, turning his attention to Mav quickly. 
“We just put the cinnamon rolls in, so let’s do some presents.” Penny informed as she sat next to Mav. Amelia sat at her classic recliner, staring at the gifts under the Christmas tree. 
“It’s present time.” And with those words gifts were passed around. Bradley had explained on the plane ride that Mav and Penny had his presents shipped to his apartment. It made sense, flying made it hard to bring anything back with you during the holidays. But that didn’t stop them from getting the two of you new beanies and scarves, things that wouldn’t be hard to take on a plane. 
“We know it’s small but we couldn’t leave you out.” Penny said as you set the items on the arm of the couch. 
“Thank you, it means a lot.” Penny smiled then excused herself to check on the cinnamon rolls in the oven. Bradley watched Amelia with a soft smile as she shoved a present towards Mav.
Seeing Bradley like this made your heart ache, knowing that he wasn’t able to experience this every year. It was lonely living away from everything you knew. You had left your home state for college, Bradley left his for work. You had happened to both get employed by the same company after university, forcing you two to stay close. But there was a kind of comfort in having each other. Bradley’s constant open availability for a movie night and you always paying for his take out was a match made in heaven. Without a further thought you nudged him lightly. 
“You okay?” Bradley nodded, that kind tilt of his lips still on his face. 
“Of course, what makes you ask?” Bradley leaned back into the couch, placing his arm around you. There was an unspoken comfortability in the small action, for you and Bradley. You leaned into him, eyes never leaving Amelia and Pete. 
“You never said good morning.” That rosy tint crept back into Bradley’s cheeks. His eyes flicked to yours briefly before leaning in, his hot breath against the shell of your ear. 
“Sorry, I won’t let it happen again.” It was now your turn for a heat to rise in your cheeks, warming you to your very core. Was Bradley flirting with you? Your brain short-circuited, replying without thinking it through. 
“You better not.” You whispered back, leaning closer into him to see Mav open a coffee mug saying “I’m a Pielat, Pielit, Pilat, I can fly” which earned a hearty chuckle from him. 
Bradley kept his arm around you for the rest of the day, except when you enjoyed Penny’s homemade cinnamon rolls that you made sure to get the recipe for. Maybe you would make them for you and Bradley sometime, to remind him of home when he needed it the most. A warmth spread through you at that thought, the idea of being able to provide him a sense of home. You shook your head, trying to push your thoughts away. Why were you even thinking that? Providing Bradley a sense of home? The two of you were friends, not an actual couple you reminded yourself of. 
-
Bradley was beyond elated with how the trip was going. It was only three days into the trip, but your sentiment about it all had changed. Bradley was surprised when you let him, continually, wrap his arm around you. He liked keeping you close to him, snuggled into his side as you all watched more Christmas movies. There was a warmth spreading through his chest, creeping into all of his crevices. It was making him whole, fixing all the cracks that were inside of him previously. He knew that you had something to do with it. 
Maybe it was the way you teased him along with his family. Or how you fit in with them so well, holding any conversation like you’d known them personally for years. The way you made snow angels charmed him too, even though you had turned into a little devil that pelted him with snowballs. Even when you were peeking over the edge of the bed, staring down at him with your wide eyes while complaining about Jake. Or maybe it was the dream he had, where dream him was fucking dream you in his childhood bedroom. Or how he couldn’t get the images of dream you moaning underneath of him. 
The feeling wasn’t completely unfamiliar, he had felt it in the past. He had always tried to ignore it, not wanting to mess anything up with you. But you were his best friend, and had been since college. What was a friendship if you didn’t sometimes love them a little too much? Right? 
It was late now though, and you were still curled up under his arm. You looked peaceful, sleep having taken over during the final christmas movie after dinner. Bradley didn’t want to wake you, wishing the two of you could stay like this forever. He didn’t get many chances to see you this peaceful. He eventually pushed those feelings to the side, deciding it was best to get you up to the bed. He didn’t want to chance you waking up in the middle of the night on the couch disoriented. 
“Hey,” Bradley nudged your shoulder, “gotta get up. Get you up to bed, can’t have you sleeping on the couch or me all night.” You rustled a little, eyes fluttering open to meet his hazel orbs. 
“Why not?” You asked with a yawn. 
“Because I’m not a bed. Plus, you gotta brush your teeth.” You gave him a face that read ‘ah’, sitting up and stretching your arms. You looked around to see just the two of you in the living room. 
“Did everyone go to bed?” 
“Yeah, everyone turned in for the night.” Bradley sat up a little bit, looking at you with this soft look. You stared at him with a sleepy look, making his heart flutter. You looked so damn cute to him. “I can carry you, if you’d like?” 
A heat flooded your cheeks from his offer. You shook your head as Bradley stood up, holding his hand out for you to take. You looked at it skeptically through your sleepy haze, eventually taking it. His large hand enveloped yours, leading you up to your room. Bradley gathered his things and scurried to the bathroom, leaving you alone in the bedroom. A part of you was starting to question why he left every time. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen you naked before, even though the times he had seen you it was an accident. 
You slowly pulled your beat up CMU sweater off, tossing it on the floor to track down your t-shirt. You put a pair of sweatpants on, t-shirt still missing. You looked around, searching for the maroon t-shirt. The door to the room opened while you were searching, revealing a shirtless Bradley with your maroon shirt in his hands. He stared at your shirtless figure, only a black bralette covering your tits. 
“I- uh.. I accidentally grabbed your shirt.” Bradley offered the maroon material out to you. 
It was as if you were frozen, staring at his body. You remembered how toned Bradley was in college, but he had changed with age just like you had. He was still slim, but it wasn’t all muscle like he used to be. The heat returned to your cheeks, radiating into the back of your neck and chest. It was a christmas miracle you tore your gaze away, only to catch Bradley’s gaze crawling all over your exposed skin. Bradley had a rosy tint to his cheeks again, something that was a common theme today. He tore his gaze away, turning his head and holding the shirt out a little more. 
“And you thought I was the tired one.” It was a poor attempt to break the new tension between the two of you. Bradley cracked an awkward smile. “I’m gonna go brush my teeth.” You said, scooting past Bradley with your t-shirt in hand. After you brushed your teeth you stared at yourself in the mirror, wondering what the hell was going on with you. 
-
"Rooster, can you come help me?" The basement door was wide open in the kitchen, Maverick at the bottom of the stairs leading into the basement. You raised your eyebrows at Bradley, who was sitting across from you at the table. 
A chill had consumed the house all morning. Everyone was bundled up in sweaters, sweatpants, cozy socks, and Bradley in a beanie. Mav had made sure to keep an eye on the thermostat, slowly watching the temp drop. Penny had left for work already, leaving Maverick responsible for figuring out the dropping heating problem. Bradley made his way to the door, asking for good luck before heading down to the basement. As Bradley's footsteps trailed to silence, your phone vibrated. 
Mickey: y'all fuck yet????
You rolled your eyes, not noticing Amelia watching you from the kitchen. 
You: we aren't gonna fuck like that
You: you’re as bad as jake
Mickey: like that??? 
You: we aren't fucking at all
Mickey: that's not what a little bird told me 
You: if you mean bob, that's not what I told him 
Mickey: it was an actual bird. or at least a mythical one (;
"A mythical bird?" You quietly asked. The text glared at you, racking the crevices of your brain. 
"Like a Phoenix?" Amelia's playful tone cut through your thoughts. 
Phoenix. Of course it was Phoenix. 
Natasha Trace was Bradley's second best friend, right after you. She went to the same high school as Bradley, and the same university as the rest of you. In college she earned the nickname Phoenix from Jake, after a wild night of partying and her being completely unphased the day after. If you had been telling Bob about what happened, there was a chance that Bradley was telling Natasha. Maybe Bradley thought all these interactions were just as weird. 
"You two are dating, right?" Amelia's voice interrupted your train of thought again. She scuttled in from the kitchen to the dining room, a blanket wrapped around her and her sweatshirt hood pulled up. She stared at you from the edge of the table. 
"What makes you ask that?" 
"First, you didn't say yes. Second, Bradley had never mentioned you prior. Just makes me wonder things." Her words weren't hurtful, she just wanted to know. Contemplation wavered in you for a moment, deciding whether to tell Amelia the truth or not. 
“Don’t tell your mom and Mav. And don’t tell Bradley that I told you this either.” Amelia’s smirk grew wide at your words. 
“I knew it!” An excited whisper left her, accompanied by a finger pointing at you. You rolled your shoulders and tilted your head at her. 
“Bradley needed someone to bring home since Mav kept asking if he was seeing anyone. And now here I am, in the freezing cold with you.” Amelia snickered at your last comment. She was a sweet girl, you could feel the secret was safe with her. 
“Bradley had never mentioned you, so I thought it was a little weird.” She admitted while pulling out a chair to sit. A nod and smile was all you were able to give her. “It’s not that you guys aren’t believable, because you are. The looks you two give each other? Those are on par with mom and Mav.” You squinted while tilting your head, eyebrows knitted together in confusion. Amelia laughed. “Why are you giving me that look?” 
“What?” Amelia’s eyes widened at your question. An at home theater had formed in your brain, replaying all of the moments of the trip in your brain. 
“Are you serious?” You just stared at her in disbelief. “You’re just as oblivious as Bradley.” The both of you turned to look at the door to the basement, hearing footsteps climbing the stairs. Pete was the first one to emerge, Bradley right on his tail. Bradley smiled awkwardly, looking between you and Amelia. He clearly knew something was up between the two of you. 
“Well, the furnace is out. Gonna have to call the H-VAC company.” Pete looked defeated, fishing his phone out of his pocket. He walked over to the sink, leaning against it as he googled the local company. Bradley made his way over to your chair, placing a hand on your back and rubbing lightly. All you could do was stare at Amelia, watching as her lips curved into a grin. 
“You two good?” Bradley questioned, his hand stilling on your back. Amelia looked up at Bradley with that grin on her lips.
“Just fine, Roo. Why wouldn’t we be?” The gal on this kid was impressing you more and more. You watched Amelia as she put her hands up under her chin, batting her lashes at Bradley. It pulled a giggle out of you, watching her try to soothe Bradley’s suspicion. Bradley scrunched his eyebrows together at Amelia, confused as to why she was acting like this. 
“O-kay. Babe, can you help me pull out some electric heaters from the garage?” You squinted at him, chatter of Mav on the phone filling the background now. 
“Um, why didn’t we get those earlier?” 
“Exactly.” It was nice to hear Amelia agree with you. 
“I asked the same thing,” Bradley leaned down between the two of you, “but you know how he is.” All three of you looked towards the kitchen, seeing Mav pinching the bridge of his nose. None of you could hear his hushed tone. Bradley turned back and stood up, shrugging his shoulders. “Said something about how high the electric bill will be.” 
“Of course he did.” Amelia scoffed, shaking her head in amusement. 
“Yeah, I’ll help with getting the heaters.” In all honesty, you just wanted away from Amelia. You wanted time to process her words, without her being present. 
The two of you bundled up, throwing on your coats and boots before heading out to the garage. Bradley swiped the key to the garage door, letting you out the house first. It felt relieving knowing it was still colder outside, reminding you it wasn’t that cold in the house. Your hands were tightly in your coat pockets, trying to scavenge any type of heat they could find. Bradley headed to the tall wooden gate that separated the backyard from the driveway. His hands rubbed together vigorously, bringing the up to blow warm air against the cold appendages. 
“Forgot gloves?” Bradley smirked at your words.
“Yeah.” It was a soft ‘yeah’, one that made your heart flutter. Bradley was staring at you with this soft look on his face. He looked at your pockets, seeing small movements behind the polyester material. “Forget yours too?” 
All you could do was nod, praying Bradley would open the gate soon.  Which he did, flipping the latch and letting you pass through before him. It was left open as he unlocked the garage door, ushering you into the smaller building. It was colder in the garage than the house, but a few degrees warmer than outside. He left the door slightly cracked as he looked for the heaters. 
Your body had started to waddle in place, trying to produce some amount of heat. You took your hands out of your coat pockets, placing them between your thighs for warmth. It was only once you curled in on yourself a little Bradley noticed you. He made his way over to you, straightening your posture up to talk to you. You were face to face with him, his face a few inches away. 
“Last time you forget gloves, right?” 
“Right.” Bradley reached at your forearms, pulling your hands out from between your thighs. He brought your hands up to his mouth, cupping them with his own. Hot breath coated the cold skin of your hands, setting your insides on fire. Your brain was starting to short circuit, feeling the hairs of Bradley’s mustache poking at your hands. Hazel eyes locked with yours, almost reading your thoughts as they popped into your brain. His lips were almost on your skin, a heat was rising from your chest into your neck and face. But no matter what warning signs your body sent out, you weren’t pulling away. 
Only a few more warm breaths of air coated your hands, Bradley pulling away. His eyes never left yours, hazel orbs peering into your deepest thoughts. His hands left yours though, grabbing his beanie off his head. The fabric was full of his residual warmth, warming your scalp and ears when he placed it on your head. 
“There, all better.” Bradley smiled at you, turning to go back and look for the heaters. 
A few moments passed before Bradley found them, hidden on a shelving unit. Your heart was still pounding from the previous interaction. But a sense of relief had washed over you once they were found. There were only three of them, but the amount didn’t matter to you. You were just glad you actually found them. You grabbed one while Bradley grabbed the other two, you closing the doors and gate while trailing behind him. 
Pete looked defeated when the two of you entered the house. Amelia was still sitting at the table, scrolling through her phone. You and Bradley both gave questioning looks to them, Amelia looked up from her phone to meet your looks. She shrugged and looked back at her phone. Maverick pinched the bridge of his nose once more, a common look for today. 
“What’s up? What’d they say?” Bradley asked as he scooted past Mav, bringing one heater out towards the living room. Mav huffed before responding. 
“Won’t be here til tomorrow.” Your look was laced with surprise and annoyance. Mav must have caught it, throwing his hands up in the air. “You’re telling me. So, we will probably have to rotate the heaters. Keep them on the first floor, then move them to the bedrooms at night.” Bradley returned from the living room, grabbing another space heater to place in the crest of the dining area and living room. After placing the last one in the kitchen, the four of you settle into the living room, bundling up with blankets as you all watch whatever Amelia put on. 
Penny was equally unimpressed with the answer the H-VAC company gave, but at least they knew it would only last a night. A space heater was moved to everyone’s respective rooms, warming them barely. A sweatshirt and sweatpants were your sleep attire for the night, Bradley wearing the same. It was painful watching him crawl on into his makeshift bed. The layers barely helped, the heater not being powerful enough to heat the entire room. That was when you heard a soft chittering. You rolled over to the edge of the bed, looking down to see Bradley curled up in a blanket and shivering. Sharing the bed was the only option to keep the both of you warm.
“Bradley?” One of his eyes opened, peering up at you. 
“Yeah?” 
“Do you wanna share the bed?” Bradley knitted his eyebrows, both eyes open now. 
“I- no, I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.” Bradley lightly shook his head. 
“Bradley, you won’t make me uncomfortable.”
“No, I’m not getting in the bed.”
“Why?” A smirk grew on Bradley’s face. 
“You have cooties, obviously.” You rolled your eyes. 
“I’m serious, you’re gonna freeze.”
“And I’m also serious.” Bradley pulled his blanket up over his neck, a shudder running through him. 
"Bradley, I can hear your teeth. Get in the bed." Your whisper was harsh as you tried to convince Bradley to remove himself from the floor. Even though you didn't really want to share the bed, you definitely weren't going to let him freeze to death on the floor of his childhood bedroom.
“Fine.” Was all you heard before Bradley stood up. 
Hot. It was the first word your brain registered when you woke up. Maybe it was the layers or the space heater that had run all night. There was a weight on your midsection, shifting to see what it was. It was hard to make out the familiar arm in your sleep induced haze.. That’s when you remembered inviting Bradley into the bed. His shuddering and shivering form on the floor forcing you to show him mercy. 
The arm tightened, pulling you closer into Bradley’s body. His sweatshirt clad chest was inviting against your sweatshirt clad back. It was telling you to relax and just accept this new fate. The fate of being wrapped up in your best friend's arms, heart racing, hot breath against your neck. It was a truly tragic fate. 
Time passed as you laid there, staring at the empty wall on the other side of the room. It’s blank canvas, oddly taunting you, not letting you forget about your current situation. The idea of checking your phone hadn’t even crossed your mind. You’d rather stay here in this comfortable, yet anxiety inducing scenario. It was obvious that Bradley hadn’t woken up yet or else why would he be spooning you, right? 
All the cuddling on the couch was for his family, showing to them that you two were a couple. Amelia being the only one to catch on that you weren’t. Well, at least you hoped she was the only one for both of your sakes. You heard a soft murmur behind you, breaking your train of thought. 
Bradley shifted closer to you, nuzzling his face into your back while pulling your midsection back. That was when you felt it. A heat crept into your cheeks, something sparking inside of you. A small rock of Bradley hips almost had a moan slipping from your lips. Your hand trailed up to your lips, covering your mouth to hide any sounds you might produce. 
Soft sounds emanated from Bradley, your thighs squeezing together as you listened. A loop of excuses kept playing in your brain, telling you that what was happening was wrong but you couldn’t stop your thighs from tightening. It took everything inside of you not to rock back into him, for your and his sanity. But it wasn’t much longer before Bradley was stirring awake. A soft ‘hmm’ was all you heard, his arm loosening around you, then there was a light scramble. 
“Oh my god.” That’s when you decided to put the intro to acting class to work. You played dumb, acting like you were asleep. After letting out a sleep noise, one you knew Bradley wouldn’t decipher, you rolled onto your back to look at him. You squint your eyes, putting on your best sleepy face. 
“What?” Bradley sat up and scooted away from you, a small pang of hurt in your chest. A sheen of sweat coated his face, a rosy tint to his cheeks. His eyes met yours for a moment, only to be broken by him. Bradley threw the blankets off of him, scooting down to the end of the bed. This was not the reaction you were expecting. 
“Bradley?” He stopped, hand resting on the door handle. 
“I’ll be back.” Panic flooded through you as he left. Thoughts of your friendship being now ruined were playing on repeat. You knew Bradley was going to come back into the bedroom and tell you to leave, that he would book a flight home for you. There was no doubt about it. You just let your best friend rut against your ass, and didn’t stop it. Of course, your friendship would be ruined. 
But it didn’t seem that way. Bradley had come back to the room, asking if he woke you and promptly apologizing. Then the day went on as normal, or what had become the normal for the both of you. 
The two of you were laying out on the couch, Amelia hidden in her room, Mav sitting in the living room with you. Pete and Bradley were watching River Monsters on the TV, the size of the fish casually catching your attention every now and then. Your phone was mainly holding your attention as you rested your head on Bradley’s thigh. Every now and then he would peer down at you, raising his eyebrows with a light expression on his face. You couldn’t make out what it really meant, but you knew it wasn’t anything bad. 
You looked back at your phone as the British man on the TV screen talked about the fish he was set after. That’s when a text notification flashed across the top of your screen. One from the group chat. 
Dagger Squad, Jakey: tongiht fuckers
Dagger Squad, Javs: are you drunk already? 
Dagger Squad, Reuben: Where? 
Dagger Squad, Nat: Jake, you better not be 
Dagger Squad, Jakey: one typo and everyone thinks you’re drunk
Dagger Squad, Jakey: i’m at work assholes
Dagger Squad, Jakey: except you Reuben, you’re not an asshole 
Dagger Squad, Reuben: Thanks. 
A chuckle left you, the sling of texts getting the better of you. Bradley noticed your laugh, giving you a questioning look. An amused huff left Bradley after you offered your phone to him. 
“How could we not? He was notorious for showing up to 8am’s still drunk or hungover.” That caught Mav’s attention, him perking up like a puppy. 
“Seresin?” Bradley nodded to Mav, you turning to look at Mav. It didn’t really surprise you that Mav knew of Jake. It surprised you that he knew what his tendencies were. “Wild kid.” Bradley let out a hearty laugh. 
“That’s what you call it? Come on Mav, I’ve heard you call him much worse.” Mav smiled, a small nod barely noticeable. Bradley had told Mav all about Jake in college, the goods and bads. 
“That’s what I’ll leave it at. Don’t want to say anything that gets me in trouble.” 
“Like how he has an ego that could rival the size of Jupiter?” Mav caught your smirk, your words pulling a chuckle from him. 
“Something like that.” It was true. Jake had a huge ego, it was apparent from the first moment you met him. He had just this aura about him that screamed ‘asshole with confidence’, even if the first part wasn’t fully true. Yes, he was an ass a lot of the time, but he did care deeply for all of you. 
“Are you two going out tonight? With Jake?” Bradley’s lips bunched to one side of his mouth. 
“Guess so.” 
For a Tuesday night the bar was packed. Even though Natasha had argued for Midland Street bar hopping, everyone decided Frick’s was probably the better choice. They weren’t the spry young college kids they used to be. The idea of walking from bar to bar while stumbling wasn’t appealing to you, especially in the fifteen degree weather. Plus, the thirty minute drive to Frick’s was better than the forty-five to Midland Street. 
Jake lightened up the minute he saw you and Bradley walk in. Jake stopped you for a moment, making you turn to show off your outfit. It wasn’t anything crazy, jeans and a cropped knit sweater. Natasha greeted Bradley immediately. Your face scrunched a little when Natasha pulled Bradley down, whispering something to him. The lighting wasn’t the best, but there was no mistaking the blush that crept up his neck. 
“You two fuck yet?” Jake’s comment pulled you from your stare. You slapped his chest with the back of your hand, giving him a scowl. 
“Jake, this is why nobody tells you anything.” He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, walking towards the table. 
“People tell me things.” You rolled your eyes, grabbing the wrist of his hand that was dangling off your shoulder. 
“Javy doesn’t count.” Jake feigned a hurt look at your teasing.
“But Javy is people.” You squeezed his wrist, chuckling at his joke. Javy appeared from the bathroom, reminding you of his rule to empty his bladder before drinking. Bradley and Natasha sat down across the table from you. This had to be the first time for the entire trip that Bradley wasn’t sitting next to you. There was a small ache in your chest, watching him scoot closer to the table across from you. Jake sitting next to you was fine, but it just wasn’t Bradley.
“Is Robert coming?” Jake asked. 
“Yeah, Bob is coming.” You replied, seeing Natasha give a confirming nod. 
“Mickey?” Another nod from Nat. “Good, getting those two to reply is like pulling teeth. Reuben even replies faster than them, and he never replies.” You rolled your eyes at Jake’s comment. Group chats weren’t Bob, Mickey, or Reuben’s thing. Hell, Bradley barely responded in the group chat either. 
“What do I never do?” All of you turned to see Reuben, a long wool peacoat and scarf adorning him. That was one thing Reuben was always good at, dressing exceptionally well. You almost jumped out of your chair, hurrying around the table to hug him. It had been years since you saw Reuben. He wasn’t the best at keeping up with people, living in his own realm of existence. You were a little jealous of it, but it did supply you for satisfying reunions. 
“Aye, and Payback is here!” Jake announced, getting out of his own chair to get a hug from Reuben. Reuben rolled his eyes at Jake’s nickname, one that he earned at university for always getting payback on Jake. Jake and Mickey were always trying to pull pranks on Reuben, trying to rile him up. To which Reuben reciprocated, pranking them in ten fold. 
Reuben took his seat at the end of the table, knowing the free seat on your left was meant for Bob. There was a matching open seat across from it, free for Mickey. 
“Yes, Mickey is coming. Class was running a bit late for him.” Sometimes you forgot that Mickey was a teacher. Not just a teacher, a professor. A professor of fine art to be precise. He taught at one of the local community colleges and recreation centers, teaching a few different types of art classes. 
“You got an excuse for Bob?” Jake asked, earning an eye roll from Javy. 
“Dude, this is the first time we’ve all seen each other in years. Why you being like this?” Javy questioned. You and everyone agreed, joining in on scorning Jake for his questioning manner. 
“Excuse me for wanting to know when my friend gets here.” His hands moved up in a defensive manner. That was when the waitress came by, taking drink orders and checking everyone’s ID. Bradley was oddly quiet, making you wonder what was going on in his brain. What had Natasha whispered to him? He wasn’t nervous the entire thirty minute car ride, so why now? 
About ten minutes passed before Bob and Mickey showed up, the both of them getting there at the same time. Bob quickly took his place next to you, Mickey sitting across from him. They both gave you these looks, ones that nobody else picked up on. They knew. They knew what had happened that morning. 
A new group chat had been formed that morning. One of just the three of you. It started initially as a ‘I need to tell Mickey and Bob that Bradley was just dry humping me in his sleep and I didn’t do anything about it’ that turned into a ‘I think I might be in love with Bradley’. Bob and Mickey weren’t surprised by either thoughts. But now you were sitting at a table with them, the temptation of teasing you right in front of them. There was a small tension, one Reuben immediately picked up on.
“So.. how’s everyone been?” Reuben asked, wanting to keep the topic off the obvious. If Mickey knew anything, Reuben knew it too. Their connection started when they were roommates, only strengthening over time. 
“Good! Kids are good too!” Javy didn’t have kids, he had students. He treated them as if they were his own, doting on all of them with an equal amount of care. 
“Still don’t know how you put up with them.” Natasha said, sipping on her gin and tonic. Bradley smiled, agreeing with a nod. 
“Well, I don’t get how you can stare at numbers all day.” Javy teased, sticking his tongue out at her. 
“It’s not that hard.” Jake chimed in. Now it was your turn to join in the conversation. 
“Says the engineer.” Jake rolled his eyes. 
“What can I say,” Jake shrugged, “I’m special.” Jake grabbed his beer bottle for a long swig. 
“If that’s what you want to call it.” Bradley said, earning giggles from everyone around the table. 
That was how the night went. All of you catching up, discussing life and things you all had planned. The topic of what you and Bradley were editing came up, Reuben curious about what new books might hit the market soon. Bob had mentioned that he was doing something computer related, not wanting to explain and potentially confuse everyone. Apparently the private accounting business Natasha started earlier that year was booming; something you never thought could describe accounting. 
Bradley’s gaze would occasionally fall on you throughout the night. While at the table they would flick from your eyes to your lips, every now and then settling on the exposed skin of your neck. His looks only became more frequent after a round of shots. That hazel gaze raking over your body once you all moved to the pool table. It only got worse when you would lean over to take your shot.
That morning had been a confirmation for Bradley, confirming his own feelings for you. It wasn’t a sudden thing, feelings he had been thinking about for a few weeks now. He was hoping this trip would just confirm you being his best friend. But that was not what happened. Every time he looked at you his heart swelled, constantly fighting the urge to press his lips to yours. Not to mention he was waking up almost every morning with a hard on because of dream you. So watching you bend over against the pool table, wiggle your hips slightly before taking your shot was painful. What was even more painful when a guy approached you at the bar. 
You didn’t really remember when you finished off your last drink, or what drink you were even on. You finished the game of pool you were playing before getting a new one. Bradley had told you during the car ride there that he would only have one beer. Which he had already had, not that you were keeping count. You did count that he was on glass three of water though. 
The bar wasn’t too crowded, just a handful of older men hanging out while having some type of whiskey you assumed. The bartender took your drink order, cracking the redbull for it and reaching for the cherry vodka. That was when someone creeped up beside you, waving at the bartender for the next order. An uncomfortable feeling settled over you, feeling a pair of eyes on you. A pair of unfamiliar eyes. 
“Hey.” You looked at the guy next to you, awkwardly smiling and acknowledging him with a nod. You didn’t say anything though, hoping he would leave you be. “You look good.” That made your eyebrows knit together. 
“Sorry, do I know you?” 
“No, but I’d like to get to know you.” You could smell the alcohol on his breath, a grimace coursing through your body. 
“No.” It was a simple word, one you figured would get the point across. 
“Come on sweets, can’t yo-” 
“She said no.” That familiar gruff voice was behind you. You weren’t sure when Bradley had appeared behind you, but you were more than happy about it.
“And who are you, buddy?” That question sparked something in Bradley, his nostrils flaring. Warmth wrapped around your waist, Bradley’s arm tugging you close to him.
“Boyfriend, now get the fuck out of here. She’s taken.” A shiver ran down your spine, a heat pooling between your thighs. Fuck, why did that make you so hot? It had to be the alcohol, not the fact Bradley was calling you his. Your hand rested against his chest, leaning into him to further his words into the stranger's brain. After the stranger left, you grabbed your drink from the bar. The warmth of Bradley’s arm never left you, even when you two walked towards the group. 
It felt like you were vibrating when everyone saw you again. Everyone had giant smirks on their faces, Bob, Reuben, and Mickey whispering between each other. Jake’s smirk was shit-eating, full of a smugness you had shockingly never seen from him before. Javy nudged Nat with his elbow, both of their smirks were full of affection. 
“Some asshole at the bar wouldn’t leave her alone.” Bradley stated when you two returned, the warmth of his arm disappeared. For the rest of the time Bradley fetched all of your drinks, from cider to shots. He was currently at the bar for a round of shots for you, Bob, Mickey, and Reuben. 
“You two make quite the pair,” Reuben took a swig of his beer, “always have if I’m being honest.” 
“And after this morning?” A heat filled you at Mickey’s words, a mix of the alcohol and embarrassment. 
“Can we not talk about that?” Bob let out a chuckle.
“What? Worried he will find you were awake the whole time?” 
“Oh, don’t act like a fucking saint Bob. We all know the shit you got up to in college.” Reuben and Mickey laughed, Bob’s eyebrows knitted together. 
“No idea what you’re talking about.” An eye roll was all you gave him. 
“So when do you two fly back?” Mickey asked. None of you noticed Bradley reappear, two shots in each hand. A part of you had forgotten that bartending is what he did to help pay his way through college. 
“December thirty-first.” Bradley answered, setting the shots all down on the table. You passed him the water you had been guarding for him. The four of you with shots toasted, Bradley toasting his water cup to you all. The liquor burned as it traveled down your throat. You weren’t completely drunk, but there was definitely a thick haze wrapped around your mind. 
“Just in time for New Years.” Reuben said, leaning back and wrapping his arm behind Mickey’s chair. A small staring contest had started between you and Bob, his blue eyes intense with knowing. 
“Guess so.” A part of you knew Reuben’s words meant more than the obvious, but the last shot was already starting to catch up to you. The haze only got worse as the night went on. Natasha was fucking with Bradley at the dart board, teasing him after every shot. Jake, Javy, Mickey, and Reuben were all playing pool; teams of two which weren’t uncommon for them. Bob sat with you at the table, taking immediate notice to your zoning stare. 
“Hey, hey.” Bob waved his hand, breaking your trance and grabbing your attention. The haze in your brain was more intense than you initially thought. A small smile was what you offered him. Bob let out a sigh. 
“How you feelin’?”  He adjusted his glasses. The chatter from the rest of the bar was mind numbing, starting to overwhelm your brain. A nausea started to settle in your stomach, bubbling into your throat. Your hands ran over your face, everything becoming too much all at once. The sounds. Your friends. The trip. Bradley.
After your hands loosened from your face your eyes caught him. His mustache twitching upwards as he held Natasha’s final dart high and out of reach. It was the same look you had watched him give Amelia during your snowball fight. Something feisty but full of warmth and care. Similar to what a big brother would give his sister. It made you think about all the looks that Bradley had given you over the trip. 
They were nothing like the looks Amelia and Natasha got. Every time you had caught him looking at you there was a softness to his gaze. A type of adoration laced into it. It made you think if his look for you had always been like that. Not the goofy caring older brother look, but the one you only gave to lovers. The look that told you he would be there through thick and thin, never leaving your side when you needed him the most. 
Everything was starting to make your head spin. Bob had concern written all over his face now. Your delayed response was really starting to stress him out. 
“Water. Fresh air. I need it all.” Bob nodded, watching you start to struggle with getting your coat on. After that he wrapped an arm around your midsection, keeping you steady against his body. The two of you made it to the bar, getting a glass of water before heading outside. Bob held the glass of water until you two were outside, sitting on the smokers bench outside. 
It didn’t surprise you that nobody was out here, it was fucking freezing. But the cold was refreshing, keeping the liquid fire coursing through your body at bay. Bob handed you the glass of water, watching as you took small sips. He ran a hand through his hair, adjusting his glasses briefly. A silence settled between the two of you, both of you watching each visible exhale. 
“Why.” Bob looked at you, not sure whether you were actually asking a question or not. 
“Why what?” The water in your glass was comforting, slightly warmer than the air surrounding you two. 
“You know.” You turned your head a little, looking towards Bob. He did the same, giving you a melancholic look. “Feelings suck.” Bob let out a small huff, one that sounded amused. 
“It's not a bad thing, liking him.” His friendly smile returned. 
“I’m afraid it might be the ‘L’ word though.” You confessed. 
“Lesbians?” You gave him a playful swat, almost spilling your water in the process. You were impressed that he would quote Scott Pilgrim at a time like this. “I know,” he clarified, “and I think you do. Maybe you have for a while.” 
It was probably true. You had only thought of him as a friend for so long, it was hard to find the exact point you realized you cared for him more than that. All those late nights at the office and editing manuscripts together were starting to feel different. You wanted to say your feelings didn’t start til you were here, but that would be a lie. The double proof reads he offered you on manuscripts, the cups of coffee when you didn’t ask, even the way he lied about you being his girlfriend. It was all muddy and confusing, but it made you warm inside. 
“Bob,” it was barely a whisper, “I don’t know what to do.” Tears pricked at your waterline, a frown forming on your lips. Bob wrapped an arm around you, letting you rest your head against his  shoulder. He felt bad for you. It wasn’t because of the circumstances, it was because he knew that you truly didn’t know what to do. 
“I think you should get some sleep, then figure out what to do.” You nodded, the material of his carhartt coat rough on your cheek. “Don’t worry, you’ll figure it out.” 
Bob placed a kiss on the top of your head. He sat with you until you finished your glass of water. It was perfect timing really. Bob decided to go find Bradley, only for Bradley to walk outside in a slight panic. Relief flooded over him when he saw you with Bob, worried the asshole from earlier might have come back to find you. 
Getting into the car was a bit of a challenge. Alcohol always made it harder to use your legs, balance becoming difficult. Bradley helped you though, Bob awkwardly standing to the side. Bob didn’t want to leave until he knew you were good. Bradley finished buckling up your seatbelt, closing the door before talking to Bob.
“Thanks man, I got really worried when I couldn’t find her.” Bob nodded, patting Bradley on the shoulder. 
“Bradley,” Bob paused for a moment, “take good care of her. Nat’s told me, and I just, don’t hurt her.” Bradley nodded softly, not fully sure how to respond to Bob. 
“Well, I don’t even kn-”
“She does. Trust me, she does.” Bob said. He patted Bradley’s shoulder one more time before heading back towards the bar. 
Bradley slipped inside the car, looking over at your already sleeping form. A soft smile formed on his lips as he admired you. You looked so peaceful while drunk and asleep. He let out a sigh, chuckling quietly to himself. You made his heart ache in ways he never thought it could. Everything about you he adored, it had only taken some time for him to realize it. He twisted the ignition, figuring it was time to finally head home. 
Bradley kept a watchful eye over you the entire ride home, checking periodically to see if you were waking up or not. But you never did, not until the final stop in the driveway. Even then it took a few minutes for you to stir. Bradley didn't mind that though, being able to admire you for a few more minutes.
"Are we home?" A sleepy haze was still casted over you, eyes not fully open and words raspy.You turned inward, on your side a little bit as you stared at him. It looked as though you were fighting to stay awake. 
"Yeah." Bradley wished you would have slept a little longer, anything to prevent him from not being next to you. He turned towards you, watching as you leaned deeper into the seat of the car.
"I'm tired." Your voice was barely above a whisper.
"I know," Bradley smiled, "you slept the whole way here." You ran a hand over your face, yawning afterwards and closing your eyes. "How do you feel?" You shrugged. 
"Just sleepy." You had never wanted to sleep in the passenger seat more than in that moment. 
"Hey, hey, babe. Let's get inside, then you can sleep in a big warm bed, okay?" Bradley started to panic, thinking you had already fallen back asleep. The sleepy flutter of your eye lashes informed him otherwise. You nodded, unbuckling your seat belt and sitting up a little bit. Bradley watched you closely, unbuckling his own seat belt. “You good? Gonna throw up or anything?” 
“No.” Another borderline whisper. Even though there was a thick mixture of sleep and alcohol coating your brain, it hung onto that one word. Babe. Bradley exiting the car and coming around to your side didn’t even register on your radar. Suddenly your door was opening, Bradley with a big warm smile staring at you. Why was he being like this? There was no one around to watch this fake arrangement currently, so why? 
“Come on, babe. We gotta get you inside.” There it was again. Bradley wrapped an arm under your armpits, you placing one around his shoulders. It was awkward, him being taller than you, but you two made it work. 
The two of you made your way slowly up the small driveway, to the steps leading to the door. Bradley quickly unlocked it, still holding onto you so you wouldn’t fall. It was like your legs were jello, barely supporting your weight without his help. You caught yourself onto the small bench in the foyer-like room, slumping back against the wall. Your eyes were trained on Bradley as he closed and locked the door. 
“Haven’t been this drunk in awhile, huh?” He asked, taking his coat off and hanging it up. Slow-motion had taken over your brain, slowing your movements. You had never realized how hard it was to unzip a coat until that moment. Bradley watched you struggle for a moment, finding your struggle with the zipper a little adorable. He hadn’t seen you this drunk since college. 
“Here, let me help you, babe.” That time something clicked in your brain. You let him take over on unzipping your coat, only for a jumbled question to exit you. 
“Why.. Why do you keep sayin’ it?” Bradley’s face scrunched together. He was now kneeling in front of you, taking your boots off because he knew that’d be a task you couldn’t handle. At least in your current state. 
“Keep saying what?” Bradley helped you up, holding you close to him until you were stable. 
“There’s no one around.” He shook his head, still confused. He led you into the kitchen, headed towards the stairs. You tripped a little up the stairs, Bradley shifted your weight more onto him for the trip up the stairs. 
“I’m still not sure what you’re talking about.” Bradley said, the two of you stumbling towards the bedroom. The wood floor under your feet felt slick, balance evading you due to the feeling. Just before getting to the bedroom, the slick sensation had you tumbling towards the wall. Bradley caught you from falling completely, pressing you into the wall with his body. The weight of his body on yours had your mind spinning. It was the first time you had fully opened your eyes since getting home. The mixture coating your brain was immediately gone, clarity appearing out of thin air. 
Bradley’s eyes flicked down to your slightly parted lips. He wanted to kiss you so badly. It was like his mouth was salivating with need. His hazel eyes flicked back up to yours, taking in your wide eyes. Guilt immediately flooded over him, reminding himself of your current state and how this might come off.
“I- I’m just trying to hold you up.” Bradley stammered, pulling his body away from yours. 
“I know.” 
“I just don’t want you to think I’m trying to take advantage of you or anything.” Bradley suddenly felt nervousness bubble in his chest. 
“Bradley,” you let out a long breath, “you keep calling me babe. Why? Nobody is around for the charade, so why?” You gestured to the empty hallway, emphasizing the nobody being there part of your sentence. 
Bradley’s face scrunched together. He hadn’t noticed himself calling you babe, but looking back he definitely did. In the car, getting you out of the car, taking your boots off. He called you babe each time. He knew why, but he was now nervous to tell you. 
“Habit.” He whispered. That whisper caught your attention. You narrowed your eyes at him, one of your hands creeping up to touch the black t-shirt under his flannel. The words were on the tip of your tongue, threatening to spill out. I love you. But instead your hand balled into a fist, pulling on the fabric of the shirt. You pushed off the wall, letting go of his shirt. 
“Of course it was.” You said. Bradley raised an eyebrow, not sure what your response really meant. He remained silent though as you started walking towards the bedroom, one hand out against the wall for support. He stayed in the hallway for a moment, cursing himself for not just telling you the truth. He wanted you to be sober for that though, wanted to know you’d remember it. He knew you weren’t black out, but he didn’t want you to write it off as your imagination. 
When he walked into the bedroom you were practically nude. Your sweater was off, jeans on the floor, currently struggling to get your bra off. Bradley quickly placed his hands on your hips, steadying you when you almost fell over. A gasp passed your lips, his searing hot hands on your skin. Bradley tried not to focus on the sensation of your panties barely touching the edge of his hands. His hands ghosted over your skin, finding their way to the clip of your bra. Your hands moved to the front of your chest, holding your breasts. 
“Let me help you,” Bradley let out a shaky breath, “before you hurt yourself.” You nodded, feeling the strap of your bra loosen. Bradley quickly found your sleep shirt, standing behind you once more. You let your bra fall, covering your chest with your hands still. Bradley got the shirt over your head, moving the collar of it down around your neck. You grabbed at the hem of the shirt, pulling it down around your body and putting your arms through the short sleeves. 
Then Bradley found your sweat pants. He kneeled down in front of you, his face level with your panties now. It took everything in Bradley not to press a kiss to your hip. Instead he guided each pant leg around your ankles, you putting a steady hand on his shoulder. Bradley was sure that his skin was going to have a mark, the warmth of your touch branding him for good. Marking him as yours and only yours. Your hand stayed on his shoulder as he stood up, trailing to the nap of his neck. He held back a gasp when he felt your finger lightly play with his hair. 
This was the most intimate thing Bradley had ever experienced. Yeah, he had fucked people in the past, but this? Dressing his best friend that he also had feelings for? He wasn’t sure if he would ever experience anything like it ever again. It was so sweet and tender. Just like the look you were giving him. 
“Sleep with me.” You whispered. 
Bradley was a goner. 
He nodded, helping you into bed before changing into his own clothes. You watched him change, eyes wandering all over his body. He crawled in the bed behind you, arm moving around your midsection. He pulled you tight against him, his chest flush with your back. You hummed lightly, basking in the warmth you had grown to love over the past few days. 
Some remnants of alcohol were starting to affect you once again. Thoughts swirled in your brain, finally working up the courage. It wasn’t like you hadn’t told him it before, like when he brought you a surprise cup of coffee or paid for the late night take out. It would be different this time though. 
“I love you.” Bradley almost didn’t hear the borderline whisper, but he did. 
There was a pause, one that started to fill you with doubt and anxiety. A part of you wished to take it back. Wanting to have not fucked up your entire friendship. A hot breath appeared on your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. Bradley was leaning up towards your ear, wanting to make sure you heard every last word. 
“I love you, too.” 
-
Neither of you spoke about that night for the rest of the trip. There was a silent agreement established that night, Bradley sharing the bed with you. His makeshift bed was finally dismantled, and so did your denial of liking Bradley. After the drunken confession of your love, it was like a weight had been lifted off your chest. Bradley felt a similar sensation about saying it back. 
Penny and Pete both said you were more than welcome to come back. Amelia had mentioned she noticed something had changed between the two of you, but didn’t elaborate. So, you didn’t tell her what had changed. But you were sad to leave them, knowing that they were the ones inadvertently protecting you from conversation that needed to be had. 
But it never came. The entire car ride to the airport was almost a carbon copy of the previous drive. You got the GPS ready for Bradley then slept in the passenger seat. Bradley stole a few glances, trying to take as many mental pictures as possible. He was certain that whatever happened that night was a trip only occurrence. One he would never get the chance for ever again. 
The airport was almost empty, most people out celebrating for the New Years. Bradley told you that was the exact reason he booked the flight for New Years Eve. A forlorn feeling hung between the both of you. It felt like this was the end of the road. Neither of you had the courage to ask what was to happen now. You wanted to ask, ask if the two of you would be going back to occasional outings and late nights at the office. As much as you wanted to know, a part of you didn’t want to. If you knew, it would be final. 
Instead, you two only made small talk about the check in process. Casual jokes and borderline uncomfortable silences were exchanged before boarding. It was even worse on the plane. Bradley put his headphones in, flicking on a podcast to listen to while you curled up near the window. The rest of the flight was quick, the entire thing being only about two hours. The city that never slept had never felt more comforting when you got back. The drive from Queens to The Bronx was going to be long, the traffic of New Years in full swing. 
Music filled the space of the car, the two of you barely talking. The lights of the city teased you through the window. It was like they were poking and prodding your brain. Snowflakes hit the window and windshield, melting on impact from the warmth of the car. A dread filled the both of you as Bradley got closer to your apartment. It felt as though these bottled up emotions would stay as just that. Bottled up and left on a shelf in the back of your hearts. 
Even when Bradley pulled up to the curb, dropping you off, it was silent. Bradley stared straight forward, focused on the car parked in front of him. The sounds of your bags being pulled out of the car were clawing at his brain. They were the sound of his time running out. He could tell you at work on Tuesday, but maybe your feelings would be different by then. The closing on the backseat door pulled him out of his thoughts. You knocked on the window, gesturing for him to put it down. 
“Thank you.” You smiled warmly. “It was fun, meeting your family and seeing everyone. I’m glad I was able to help.” Your brain was screaming to say the three words, hoping he wouldn’t have forgotten the first time you said them. 
“Yeah, it was fun. Thanks for coming with and being my fake girlfriend.” Bradley wanted to kick himself as soon as he said it. He watched as your smile faded, giving him an affirming nod. 
“I’m gonna head up now. I’ll see you at work?” 
“Yeah, see you at work.” Bradley rolled the window up, watching you walk away. Your figure was altered by the droplets of melted snowflakes, making you seem more distant. Bradley felt a prickle at his waterline, knowing tears would be coming sooner or later. You opened the door for the stairway that led to your apartment, vanishing out of Bradley’s view. Bradley leaned back against the headrest, closing his eyes tightly. 
Tears threatened to pour down your cheeks the entire walk up the stairs. For once you hated that you lived on the third floor. Hated that it gave you so much time to think about the day. All of the never ending silence. It was clear that there was something broken between the two of you. The relationship strained or shattered. You quickly slotted the key into the door, knowing that once you were in your apartment you would be okay. It would mean you were safe. Safe to let out all of your emotions. 
But no tears fell once you crossed the threshold of your apartment. It was almost a numbing sensation instead. You slipped your coat off with ease, hanging it up by the door. The urge to put your suitcase and carry-on away disappeared. It wasn’t until you sat on the couch everything hit you. No sob wracked through you, only silent tears fell. The warm streaks heated your face, your lips turning into a small frown. 
A knock at your door had you wiping away the tears. You had no idea why someone would be knocking on your door this late. After getting to the door you checked the peephole, seeing a rather worked up looking Bradley. Confusion coursed through your body, not sure why he would be back. He let you go, what did he want now? You unlocked the door, opening it to see Bradley’s eyes widen. 
“Bradley, wha-” His hands cupped both sides of your face, smashing his lips against yours. You melted into the kiss, the hairs of his mustache lightly poking your upper lip. It was like something exploded inside of you, spurring you on to kiss him back. 
The two of you made it into your apartment, Bradley kicking the door closed with his foot. You tried trailing for his lips when he pulled back from yours. Even though your lungs were burning for air, you wanted to feel more of him. His forehead pressed lightly against your own, hazel eyes boring into your own. 
“I love you.” Hearing those three words from Bradley cracked the bottle, letting your emotions flow freely. 
“I love you too.” A tear fell from the corner of your eye. Bradley swiped it away, pressing his lips to yours once again. A river of passion flowed freely between the two of you. Your arms trailed up to wrap around his neck and shoulders; one of his hands ghosting down to your waist, the other cupping your jaw still. 
Teeth and tongue clashed while the two of you moved to the hallway of your apartment. The wall pressed into your back as Bradley pressed his hips into yours. A whine broke from you when you felt his semi-hard cock pressing into your hip. Wet kisses trailed down to your jaw and neck, the scratch of his mustache intoxicating. Bradley moaned against your skin when he felt you tug on the hair at the base of his head. 
“I’ve been wanting this all trip. Kissing you like this, having you pressed against me like this.” Bradley whispered into your ear, nipping at your earlobe. He pulled back to look at you, still cupping your jaw. His thumb softly rubbed your cheek, “I love you so much.”
“Why didn’t you kiss me that night?” The question passed your lips before you could stop it. Bradley nuzzled into the side of your neck, pressing soft searing kisses to your skin. 
“You were drunk.” Bradley slotted a leg between your thighs, rocking lightly to earn a moan from you. 
“Why not any other night?” Your words were breathy. 
“I didn’t know if you wanted it.” The hand on your jaw trailed down, cupping your breast over your knit sweater. Your hips bucked against his thigh, kisses trailing down your neck.
Both of his hands ghosted down to the bottom of your sweater, pulling it up over your body. Bradley marveled at the image before him. The person he had cared for for years looked so innocent before him. The soft pink bralette you wore enticed him, teasing him with what he could now have. It wasn’t until your arms pulled up to cover yourself slightly did his concern take over. 
A part of you felt nervous, finally having Bradley like this. Letting him see you so bare and vulnerable for him. It wasn’t his first time seeing you like this, a few college run ins and the instance during the trip. But this was different. You were offering your body up to him, trusting him to please you and care for every inch of you. It was subconscious when you shied away. 
“You do want this, right?” Bradley’s forefinger touched your chin, tilting your face. His hazel eyes were intoxicating and comforting. They let you know you were safe. You nodded. 
“I do, I want you.” Bradley pressed a soft kiss to your lips, mustache prickling your upper lip lightly. 
Strands of hair threaded through your fingers, you tugging softly to urge Bradley on.
Bradley picked up on it, hands ghosting down your sides to your hips. His tongue was soft on your lips, asking for permission to enter your mouth. His hips rocked into yours, you feeling his cock growing harder. Moans and whimpers fell from the both of you, rocking together while exploring each other's mouths. It felt like you were in high school again, the excitement of minimal contact vibrating through your body. 
Your fingers moved downward, trailing at the bottom of Bradley’s own sweater. He caught onto the hint, moving his torso back from yours to pull his sweater and t-shirt off. Rough yet soft fingers ghosted over the band of your bralette. The material felt almost as soft as your skin to Bradley, his cock twitching at the thought. His fingers trailed the material up to the strap that rested on your left shoulder. He eased it down, kissing at your shoulder and collarbone. 
“You’re so beautiful, so fucking beautiful.” The whisper on your skin sent goosebumps blossoming all over you. “I’ve been waiting so long for this.” Bradley’s fingers dipped below the band of your bralette, tugging up over your chest to expose your breasts. Your nipples were pert and eager for Bradley’s touch. 
One of your hands went to his hair, tugging as he took one of your breasts into his mouth. Your back arched off the wall, pushing your breast flush with his mouth. Gasps fell from your lips as his other hand came to your other breast, fingers pinching and playing with your other nipple. Bradley groaned against your tit, the vibrations traveling to your cunt. Your insides tightened, pleading you for more. 
“Bradley, please. I need more.” Bradley let your breast go from his mouth, pressing his hips tighter to yours. He rolled them, his cock rubbing at the apex of your thighs. 
“Tell me, Tell me you want me.” A red flush had grown up Bradley’s chest, adorning his neck and cheeks now. Your free hand trailed down his chest, the need to just touch him too great. 
“I want you to feel you,” the hand trailed up to his shoulder, “I want you to make love to me.” 
Bradley couldn’t hold back the groan that escaped him. He smashed his lips into yours, hands cupping your breasts before traveling lower. He made quick work of the button on your jeans, messily shifting your pants down your thighs. A small giggle bubbled out of you as you chased his lips, not wanting the kiss to end. 
He kneeled in front of you, easing your jeans off your legs. Small soft kisses littered the front of your thighs with the accompaniment of pricks from his mustache. Fingertips ghosted up the sides of your legs, gently guiding your panties down. The kisses traveled up your thighs to your hips, both of your hands diving into his hair. Two fingers ran through your folds, briefly touching that sensitive bundle of nerves. 
“Fuck, Bradley.” Bradley pressed his mouth to your folds, flicking his tongue between them. Your body lurched over him slightly, whining as his tongue ravished your clit. 
One of Bradley’s hands moved up to separate your folds, his tongue diving deeper between them. Small prickles of his mustache could be felt on your sensitive flesh, your fingers tightening in his hair at the feeling. The flicks of his tongue drove you crazy, a tense sensation in your abdomen forming. Your head fell back, moans pouring from your lips as Bradley continued his assault. 
“Your tongue feels so good.” It was barely above a whisper, laced with a moan as your hips started to push towards his face. 
Small ripples of pleasure coursed through you, adding to the imminent wave of pleasure that was about to crash over you. Bradley groaned against you, shaking his face back and forth on you. Bradley flattened his tongue, wiggling it back and forth across your clit. The motion was overwhelming, a shudder running through your body from it. You tried to pull him off of you, knowing if he kept it up you would be a goner. Bradley let you tug at his hair harshly, never budging from you. 
The wave of pleasure you had been anticipating crashed over you. Intense pleasure flooded your system, making it hard to think. All you could do was roll your hips against Bradley's tongue. Your hands kept him pulled tightly on you, mustache digging into your folds. Bradley didn't mind, the image of you unraveling on his face had his cock twitching in his jeans. The sounds falling from you were angelic to him. An endless mantra of his name with moans mixed in. 
"Brad-Bradley! Sto-stop!" Bradley finally pulled back, letting you get some much needed relief. There was a thin sheen to his mustache, the hallway light showing it at the right angles. 
"That was so hot." Bradley stood up, kissing you gingerly. Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him in for an intense kiss. You could taste yourself on his tongue, a small wetness prickling your upper lip. 
One of your hands trailed down his chest, earning a groan from him. Only the fabric of his jeans and boxers separated the two of you. His jean clad hips rolled into your bare ones. You cupped him through his jeans, reminding you of his size. With one hand you unbuttoned his jeans, pushing your hand into his boxers. Bradley pulled back, resting his forehead against yours while letting out a loud groan. 
"Fuck, babe, your hand feels so good." Feeling him praise you lightly sent a shudder through you, your insides clenching. 
His cock was warm and velvety in your hand, pulsing and twitching with each stroke. Bradley's head drifted to your shoulder, lips haphazardly kissing at the skin. Your touch was intoxicating, his brain going fuzzy as your strokes continued. A tightness in his abdomen had started to form. One of his hands grabbed your wrist, pulling it from the inside of his boxers. 
"As much as I'd love for you to continue, I need to be in you now." Bradley whispered against your skin. His words had you arching, nodding your head in agreement. 
The thought of his hard cock opening you up, stretching you until you couldn't take it had you moaning. Your tits were pressed tightly against his chest as your lips collided once more. You pulled back from the kiss, taking his hand and leading him down the hallway to your bedroom. He rid himself of his jeans and boxers as soon as he got to your room. Bradley had you on the bed quickly, hands groping and massaging your sides. His lips ghosted over your skin as he slotted himself between your legs. 
His cock rested against your folds, twitching every now and then. The two of you kissed, consuming everything the other had to offer. Bradley rolled his hips into yours. His cock pushed through your folds and rubbed against your clit. Your legs fell further apart, preparing yourself for the pleasure that was about to come. Bradley pulled back from you. Your eyes locked with his as he grabbed the base of his cock. 
The head of his cock prodded at your entrance. Bradley watched your lashes flutter while he pushed into you. A gasp falling from your lips as he continued. Your gaze never broke his those. He watched your face as you took all of him, filling you to the hilt. 
Once Bradley bottomed out, he started pressing kisses all over you. His hips were still as he littered you with kisses. Forehead, cheeks, neck, jaw, shoulders. All touched by the tender grace of his lips. Gentle roaming of his hands around your body kept you grounded in this reality. The two of you sat there for a few moments, him peppering your skin as your walls adjusted to his size. A kiss was pressed to your cheek before he pulled back to look down at you. 
“Hey.” The word was barely above a whisper, one hand moving up to caress your cheek. 
“Hey.” You whispered back, leaning up to kiss him. Bradley shifted his hips, pulling back a little before pushing back in. 
It was a soft rocking pace he created. His hips slowly rolled, his hands moving to hike your legs up around his waist. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, hand threading through his hair as he nuzzled into you. Moans and whimpers poured from the both of you, an occasional whisper of each other’s name. His pace picked up, hips moving slightly faster and harder.
“You feel so good,” Bradley groaned, “I don’t know how long I’ll last.” 
Every twitch of his cock you could feel. Your walls squeezed around him, earning a moan from the both of you. He slowed his thrusts for a moment, not wanting to come too soon. Bradley wanted this moment to last forever, even though he knew it wouldn’t. He stopped his thrusts completely, staying seated inside of you completely though. Bradley moved up to sit on his heels, looking down at you. 
His gaze raked over you, moaning when he saw his cock pressed into you. One of his hands settled between your breasts, trailing down to your hips. His thrusts picked back up, the new angle hitting that sensitive spot inside of you. Your walls were clenched tightly around him, the both of you letting your heads drop back. 
“If you do that one more time.” Bradley smirked as he looked down at you. You intentionally squeezed your walls around him, listening to the deep groan that emanated from his throat. 
“Or what?” You playfully joked. Bradley’s hands coasted down your legs, grabbing your hips tightly. 
“Or this.” Bradley almost pulled all the way out, his tip still inside of you. He rammed his hips forward, hitting that spot inside of you. Your back arched hard, an almost painful moan ripping from you. Bradley leaned back down over you, caging you in between his arms. 
“I love you.” Bradley whispered, kissing your neck and nibbling on your earlobe. 
“I love you, too.” Bradley kept up a softer pace, edging the both of you closer to your climaxes. 
It was one of the most intense orgasms you had ever experienced. All your muscles tensing as pleasure rocked through your body once more. Emotions flowed from you, Bradley’s name filling the space around the two of you. You carded your fingers through Bradley’s hair, letting him know you had him. Bradley’s hips were stuttering, whines falling from the both of you as he came inside of you. 
Hot breath beated against your neck as you two laid there. Bradley was still inside of you, laying on top of you as he regained his breath. You kept carding your fingers through his hair, almost a mindless action now. A shudder ran through you once Bradley shifted, propping himself up on his arm. His eyes were soft when he looked down at you. 
“Hmm?” You questioned. 
“Just looking at you.” Bradley said, leaning in to press a kiss to your cheek. “Happy New Years.” 
“Happy New Years.”
A whimper left you as he pulled out of you. A slick feeling replaced the new empty one, his cum dripping out of you. Bradley quickly hopped off the bed, heading to your bathroom to find a washcloth. 
“I’m sorry, I should have pulled out.” Bradley apologized, handing the warm wet washcloth to you. You shrugged, taking it to clean yourself. 
“As long as you buy the plan B.” Bradley smiled, nodding as he sat on the bed near you. He chewed at his bottom lip, nervous about the impending conversation. He had already put everything out on the floor. It was hard to take back ‘i love you’ while your entire dick was in someone. But it wasn’t like you hadn’t shared the same sentiment. You picked up on his nervousness though, reaching a hand out to touch his thigh. 
You tossed the washcloth across the room, silently cheering when it made it into the basket. Bradley took notice, elbowing you softly. “Nice shot.” 
“Thanks.” You stared at him for a little bit, taking in all of his features before speaking. “So, this?” You gestured between the two of you then scooted up the bed. Bradley laid back on the bed, you propping yourself up on your elbow next to him. Even though he was nervous, all he could think about was that you looked like an angel. 
“I love you,” Bradley started, “but more than a friend.” 
“Obviously, you goof.” You tried to keep a straight face, only to smile at him. “I love you, too. The trip really helped me see it.” Bradley nodded. 
“I knew before the trip. Well, for me, I did. Why else would you think I’d buy you so much coffee?” You lightly smacked his chest, his hand catching your hand. 
“I don’t know, maybe ‘cause you’re a good person.” You sat up, “I gotta pee.” 
“I am a nice person!” Bradley shouted as you took off for the bathroom. He got up, finding his boxers and slipping them on. 
He had been to your apartment many times, but only in your bedroom a few times. It was very you he noticed, now having the time to take it all in. There was a cork board on one wall. It was littered with pictures, ones from college and a few from the past few years. There was one specific one that stood out to him though. It was of the two of you, on that neither of you had taken. He had an arm wrapped around your shoulders as the two of you looked at one another. Must have been from an office party. It made him wonder if the two of you always looked like a couple to everyone. 
“What?” Bradley looked at you, taking in your new clothed form. It was only a baggy t-shirt and underwear, but god did he find it beautiful. 
“Just looking at these pictures. Wondering if we always looked this good together?” You bumped your shoulder into his arm playfully, looking at the same picture. 
“What are you implying?” You knew the answer, surely you did. Bradley turned to you, cupping your face with one of his hands. 
“I’m implying that I’d like to be in a relationship with you.” A flutter appeared in your chest when he pressed his forehead to yours. 
“I think I’d like that, too.”
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phoward89 · 7 months
Text
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Based on this ask
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Your day started as it normally does. You woke up in your boyfriend's arms, trying to wiggle away from him without disturbing his sleep. And like every morning, Coryo woke up, only to hold you closer and press a good morning kiss to your lips.
“Morning, darling.” He greeted you, voice rough with sleep.
“Morning, Coryo “ You replied with a smile.
“Where are you going, baby?” Coryo asked as you tried to get up.
“I need to pee and we have to get ready.” You told the platinum blonde, whose curls were messily resting against his red silk pillowcase like a halo. When Coriolanus made no move to let you get up, you lightly rubbed his chest while reminding him, “We both have classes today and you have that meeting with Dr. Gaul to see if you're qualified to be promoted from an intern to a full time gamemaker position.”
“I think you're more nervous about my meeting than I am.” Your boyfriend sighed, letting his hold on you go.
“It's a very important meeting, Coryo. Of course I'm nervous for you.” You told your boyfriend as he sat on the edge of the bed, slipping on his slippers. Before he could stand up, you wrapped your arms around him from behind. Resting your head against his shoulder, you said, “I know how much you want to become a gamemaker.” The blonde man didn't say a word, just placed his large hand over yours. He ran the calloused pad on his thumb over his knuckles as you continued your thoughts with, “You're always pushing yourself to be the best. And to become the youngest gamemaker in Panem's history while enrolled at the University as a double major's an honor, one that I know you want to have.”
“You know me so well, Y/N.” Coriolanus lightly chuckled. Gently unwrapping your arms from around him and standing up, he sighed, “We better get on with our morning.”
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After doing your morning routine of showering, dressing, and eating breakfast, Coryo drove you both to Capitol University, the most esteemed university in all of Panem. Since you were a couple of years younger than him, your classes were mostly pre-recs and were on the other side of the campus then the major focused classes. So, you and your boyfriend parted ways with a kiss shortly after arriving in the parking lot of the University.
Coriolanus took off towards where his classes and friends were while you took off to find your own friends and attend your classes.
Everything was going fine until lunchtime rolled around.
You usually ate lunch with your friends, a small group of girls that you've known since your academy days. Sometimes Coriolanus would join you, bringing Clemensia and Festus to tag along. Other times, which was usually all the time, your boyfriend spent his lunch hour in the library studying, working on projects, and drawing up proposals to hand to Dr. Gaul concerning the games.
Unfortunately for you, this afternoon was one of those days that Coryo was holed up in the University library, doing something productive in his quest for academic supremacy and power.
Usually, it'd be fine and you'd just eat in the University dining hall with your friends, but not today.
No…
Today you got into a fight with your friends. A fight that started over a simple disagreement. It was a silly disagreement really. A disagreement that started over, of all things, dresses for the upcoming Spring Ball.
One of your friends got upset that you simply told her that maybe she shouldn't plan to wear a black dress, but maybe something pastel since she already wore black a few months back for the Yule Ball. She snapped at you and even made a snide remark about how you could afford to buy a thousand dresses and for a thousand balls since you're shacking up with Coriolanus Snow. The remark hurt, but what hurt worse was that your other friends backed her up; attacked you too.
The lunch fight got so heated with all the screaming, yelling, shouting, and crying that the other students eating in the dining hall stopped what they were doing to watch and listen in.
Yea, your fight with your friends was quickly becoming a spectacle for gossip.
Feeling overwhelmed by sadness, you gathered your things and rushed out of the dining hall. Unfortunately, your absence was the perfect opportunity for your friends to start spreading lies about you. To make it seem like you weren't a good friend, that you were greedy, etc.
The girls you've been friends with since your Academy Days were being petty. Ruining years of friendship. And for what?
A simple disagreement. Or was there more to it? Was jealousy over your relationship with Coryo the true cause of it?
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Your day went from bad to worse when your phone kept going off left and right with Pangram notifications. As it turns out, your friends weren't your friends anymore and they were posting all kinds of mean things about you. Even tagging you in the posts too. And your best friend, well she was petty enough to post the glittery words of Fuck You on her social media.
Words aimed at you.
And the worst part was that you're dealing with all of this alone since your boyfriend has his own studies to worry about. And, of course, he has a very important meeting with Dr. Gaul about his future career.
Usually you'd catch a ride home with one of your friends if Coryo had work or meeting scheduled at the Citadel, but not today.
Today you had to walk home from the University since you lost your friends. And, of course, your mind kept replaying everything as you walked home.
And when you finally got home, you dropped your books on the glass star shaped coffee table and made a mad dash to your bedroom before Grandma’am could realize that you were home and ask about your day.
You adored Coriolanus' grandmother, you really did, but sometimes she could be a bit much. And after the day you had, well, you just didn't want to deal with her. In fact, you didn't want to deal with anybody at the moment.
All you wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry.
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When Coriolanus walked into the penthouse he had a huge smile on his face. He was on the right track for graduating Summa Cum Laude and being the Valedictorian of his class. He was also given an assistant gamemaker position, which was amazing consider that made him the youngest gamemaker on Dr. Gaul's staff.
Dr. Gaul has told Coriolanus that he had a drive that she hadn't seen since she taught his father. That, in fact, his drive for success surpassed that of the late General Snow’s. That he, Coriolanus Snow, was destined for great things; to be a great contributor to Panem. She even told him that she saw political potential in him.
Coryo couldn't wait to tell both you and Grandma'am about his great news, but when he came home he was only met with the sight of Grandma’am in a sitting chair, watching one of her late afternoon Capitol TV soaps, and your books on the glass coffee table. He instantly knew that something was wrong. You'd never ignore Grandma’am. Not unless you weren't feeling well.
No. You loved his Grandma’am. Adored her, enjoyed her company.
“Is Y/N feeling unwell?” Coriolanus asked his Grandma'am, his icy blue eyes shifting between her and your books.
“I'm not sure, Coryo. I didn't see her come in.” The old woman, dressed in a fine tunic and a matching jeweled turbin, told her grandson.
“I’ll check on her, Grandma'am. Just continue watching your soap.” He told her before walking down the hall towards his room. The room that he's been sharing with you ever since he moved you in.
“Darling, are you unwell?” Coryo asked, opening the door and stepping inside of the bedroom.
The site of you curled up in a ball on the bed, crying, gutted him. He hates to see you cry.
And whoever made you cry was dead. Coriolanus would personally make sure of it. Nobody makes his baby cry and gets away with it
Nobody.
“Baby, what’s wrong? What happened?” Coryo asked, rushing over to the bed.
And when you felt him wrap his arms around you, you broke down. You told him everything that happened. About the fight and how you lost all of your friends. About how they pettily posted shit on Pangram all day and how they've been gossiping about you; talking trash.
Coriolanus just let you spill your guts to him. The more you told him, the more he began to scheme up ideas to make those girls pay for what they did to you.
And they were going to pay.
Their families were going to pay too.
All because they made you cry. When they made the girlfriend of Coriolanus Snow cry, well, they just opened up Pandora's box. And once that bitch’s open, it doesn't close.
As Coryo spooned you, he pressed a kiss to your shoulder and assured you, “You’ll feel better now that you've cried it out, baby” He nuzzled your neck, only to tell you, “I'm sorry those bitches did that to you, Y/N. You're the sweetest girl I know; you didn't deserve that.”
“It hurts, Coryo.” You sniffled. Staring out the window that was by the bed, you sighed, “I thought they were my friends. I've known them for years, just for them to turn on me because of a comment about a dress.”
Everything clicked in Coriolanus mind as soon as he heard you say ‘just for them to turn on me because of a comment about a dress’. Those words were all it took for him to realize that your friends were jealous of you because you belonged to him. They were jealous because he moved you into his house and spoiled you with clothes, jewelry, sweets, and anything else you could possibly want. They're jealous because he's rich, the Plinth heir, and he's showering you (his girl that made him fall in love again, even though he swore he'd never love anyone ever again) in luxury.
“They're jealous, baby.” Your boyfriend told you.
“I know.” You sadly nodded.
Pressing a kiss to your cheek, Coriolanus promised, “Baby, I'll never let anyone hurt you ever again.”
And he kept that promise.
Coriolanus made your former friends pay for what they done to you. For making you cry.
He ruined and bankrupted their families. He also ruined their reputations and had them expelled from the University.
Your Coryo made sure that everyone knew that if they messed with you then they messed with him. Safe to say, everyone kisses your ass out of fear that your boyfriend would make them disappear or make their lives a living hell.
Coriolanus also made sure that you were accepted into his friend circle. Those snotty rich kids at least didn't backstab their friends.
Well, Coriolanus did out of that group, but he wouldn't be backstabbing them til years later when he got deep into his presidential campaigns.
But for now, Coryo was just your supportive boyfriend that held you as you cried, dried your tears, and made everything all better for you.
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luveline · 2 years
Note
OK THE STEVE ZOMBIE AU BUT HE DOES FINALLY MIRACULOUSLY FIND ROBIN OR MAYBE DUSTIN OR LITERALLY ANYONE FAMILIAR. Our girl is happy but also like 👀 u finna ditch me now?
theres literally no zombies in this lmao </3 apocalypse au with new (but not really) boyfriend steve wherein you reunite with some old friends and find a community (and worry steve is gonna break up w u) fem!reader 7k words
The border between Indiana and Michigan is quiet. Nothing denotes its location besides a Welcome to Indiana sign. 
Steve's hand tightens around yours. You stand there for minutes, wind breezing past your tired bodies and ruffling his limp hair. 
"Do you think this is our last time seeing Indiana?" you ask quietly. 
There's no need to shout. The town surrounding the border is abandoned. 
He drops your hand. You miss his touch and the soothing effect it gives to hold it immediately. 
"Maybe," he says. "Does that bother you?" 
It fucking scares you. Staying there wasn't really an option anymore, not with the infestation of geeks dribbling away from Indianapolis or the lack of food. And besides that, you'd wanted to get to Michigan badly. Steve and his friend Robin had been planning to come here together before their untimely separation. Half of Hawkins had been aiming for Michigan after the news broke all those months ago — Illinois, Ohio, and Kentucky overrun by flesh-eating monsters. 
But if you leave Indiana, you're admitting it's a lost cause. That the lives you led there are gone, candles snuffed out by a sudden ripping gale. 
"I just…" You look over your shoulder at Michigan. "Can't believe we're here." 
"I think I'm glad we're here." 
You cock your head toward him. 
"Not just to find Robin," he clarifies. "But, no offence? Indiana was kicking your ass." 
You grimace at his implication. Indiana was kicking your ass. You've rolled your ankle more times than you can count. You'd fallen ten feet through the floor and given yourself a major concussion. You've been snarled at, robbed at knifepoint, and almost eaten. 
"Fucking Indiana," you say. 
"Fuck Indiana." He turns on his heel, but not before he's wrapped a hand around your arm to drag you with him. "Michigan better be nice to my girl, or we're going to Canada." 
You've already let him walk you a couple of feet when you have the bearings to splutter, "Your girl?" 
He ignores you, the smallest hint of a smile playing on his lips. You’re pretty confident in being his girlfriend, but something about being ‘his girl’ makes your head rush.
You'd found a gun a little ways back but no ammunition for it. It's a good prop regardless, so Steve keeps it in hand stuffed into the pocket of his windbreaker ready to scare off anyone with enough wits to find guns scary. You're sitting ducks otherwise, armed with one small penknife and the metal baseball bat that Steve keeps in the strap of his rucksack, so you stick to the side roads. Being out in the open is risky. You're used to this mode of living, adept at slinking and skulking in dimly dark places. 
"Steve?" you ask, a murmur in the ringing quiet. Cicadas chirp in the trees, leaves rustling with each burst of wind. 
"Yeah?" he asks shortly, distracted by the door in front of him. 
He's attempting to pick the lock of a convenience store's sidedoor. You're standing guard.
"Where do you think Robin is?" 
He doesn't answer for a while. He works a delicate job, the slim pick in his hand creaking formidably with every wrong move. He's too forceful, and you're the better locksmith, but your wrist still twinges from your fall in the woods a few days ago. Steve's too protective for his own good. 
"I don't know. But she's smart, and-" He hisses, hair falling into his eyes. "I'm hoping she's still here." 
"If I were her, I'd wait for you." 
He tips his head back to meet your eyes. "If you ever stay somewhere dangerous waiting for me, I'll fist fight you." 
Usually you'd burst into laughter at his familiar abrupt absurdity — you've grown to adore his jokes now that you know there's no real malice behind them — but you want him to hear what you're saying. You want to know if he'd do the same. 
"I would," you say softly. 
The lock clicks open. 
Steve grins at you. "You won't need to. You're stuck with me like glue." 
Inside of the store is a sorry sight. While the shutters had been down, a good sign, the interior is much less promising. Sunshine filters in through the smallest cracks, casting a scarce light over what's left of the aisles. Two are crushed to one side as if a huge hand has swept them away. Smashed booze bottles litter the floor. Glass like snow crunches underfoot, and a sticky sour smell is heavy in the air. 
You ease into the room on pins. 
"There's gotta be something," Steve says, pulling his pocket-sized torch out to give you a better view. 
Where the shelves have collapsed, there's a small tunnel to the front of the room. You bend down to assess it. 
"I think there's cookies over there." 
"Where?" Steve demands. You point to aforementioned treats.
He army crawls through the gap and pops out on the other side. Those few seconds where you can't see him are unsettling, and from the speed with which he looks at you, he may have felt the same. 
"Keep an eye out," he says. 
You turn to the door. You've closed it tight but it won't lock without a key, and anyone might assume what you have and come inside. 
Steve hisses an excited, "Yes!" 
"How'm I s'posed to keep watch when you're doing that?" 
"Babe, there's fucking Chips Ahoy." He loves them.
"I'm sick of Chips Ahoy," you mumble to yourself. "I miss carrots. And potatoes. I miss pasta. Pasta." 
"Should I be jealous?" 
"Definitely. I'd trade you for a full, home-cooked meal any day, handsome. Fresh made pasta, sun dried tomatoes. Garlic bread." You could cry thinking about it, all those rich flavours together. 
"Call me crazy, but I think we could make you some pasta. Look-" He holds up a small jar. "Crushed garlic." 
You brighten. "Where'd you find that?" 
Garlic is a great flavour to make literally anything taste better, like all the canned stuff people don't always take: artichoke hearts, asparagus, aubergine. 
"Holy shit, score.” Steve holds another tin up, torch held between his chest and his upper arm. 
Your eyes turn round as saucers. 
That night, you decide to stay in the convenience store. You'll be cornered if somebody tries to get in, but you'll be safe from geeks and the elements. Two out of three isn't bad. 
You and Steve share the only fork, chowing down on his amazing find of tinned vegetable soup and dumplings. It barely registers in your head that it's cold, it's so nice to be eating something that isn't spaghettios. You could've built a fire outside to warm it if you weren't scared of being spotted by scroungers. Or worse, cannibals. 
"Maybe we should go outside. Look for smoke," you say. Smoke means people.
"Good idea.” He urges you to take what's left of the soup, stands, and kisses the top of your head as he does.
You're pretty sure there's bliss like the light of a star radiating off of your skin, elated at his easy affection. You're almost as happy to get to finish the soup. 
While he's gone, you open your bag and scrounge for what little self-care you have. Toothpaste is abundant in every store no matter how looted, as is soap, but soap needs water, and you're running low. You brush your teeth with toothpaste alone and use a little bit of water on a rag to wipe the oil off of your face, guilty and thankful at once. If you don't wash yourself when you can, you'll go crazy. 
You apply another layer of roll on old spice and hope it'll hold out until you can find another lake, river, or tributary, which shouldn't be impossible. Michigan is surrounded by water, a fact that had put you off coming here at first. 
You go where Steve goes, though, so Michigan it had been, and Michigan it is. 
Your first night’s already proved fruitful. There's more than enough food here if you're willing to get weird (and you and Steve usually are). More food than you could carry. 
Which is a little suspicious, now that you think about it. 
Nobody thought to look here? 
Is there anybody to look? 
You push all your stuff aside and scramble onto your knees, suddenly paranoid. Steve's taking too long, what if this place is a trap? A honeytrap to lure in mindless ants. What if they've already grabbed him, and– 
"Oh, Jesus," Steve says as he opens the door, voice uber loud in the night time stillness. "You scared me. What's the matter, need to pee?" 
"I thought somebody kidnapped you," you say, trying for joking and missing by a mile. 
Steve leans against the door. He's regained his controlled volume and demeanour, "Safe and sound. I'm serious, do you need to pee?" 
You and Steve pad out your corner of the store against the pilfered chip aisle. He lets you use his chest as a pillow, and when he turns off the torch there's nothing to do but listen to his breathing and feel his chest move under your ear. 
You rub his sternum with the heel of your hand. "You could use me as a pillow sometime. If you wanted to." 
"Yeah? You're softer than me, I think I'd love that." 
You draw a short line to his navel, thinking. Lucky to have found him. Lucky to like him this much, and lucky that he likes you. You're 'his girl', and you get to sleep on his chest and sometimes when he's not worrying himself to the bone he'll tell you secrets. You know him better than you’ve ever known anybody.
He curls his arm around your shoulder and takes your upper arm into his hand, the heat from his fingers seeping into your skin. You've taken off your coat because it's uncomfortable. Steve will fold it over your chest when you fall asleep. 
"It was a good day, right?" He sounds terrified of jinxing it. 
You kiss his chest, or his t-shirt, so lightly he likely doesn't feel it. A kiss for your sake rather than his. "It was a good day." 
He holds you close. His heart thrums in your head. 
"Floor's like a fucking ice cube," he mutters. 
You cover as much of him as you can with your arms, sleep tugging at your eyelids. "I'll keep you warm," you promise as they close. "Wake me up when you get too tired." 
"Alright." He massages your arm in his hand gently, and you fall asleep. 
Steve flinches awake at the whisper of a sound outside. A younger Steve, one who'd known nothing about geeks, or people, really, how awful they can be, wouldn't have woken. Hell, Steve could've slept through a hurricane when he was in high school, all those years where he'd stayed up too late playing hooky and smoking Malboro's behind the Big Buy. He looks back now and wonders how much sleep he missed out on in his king-sized mattress, up to his eyeballs in cushy sheets and fresh linens. Why had sleeping felt like such a chore? 
And after that, when he and Robin would stay up watching shitty movies and eating the free stale popcorn from the video store. Though he wouldn't trade any of that away. 
Fucking idiot, he thinks to himself scathingly. He was not supposed to fall asleep. He checks you over quickly. In your sleep you've slid off of his chest and onto the tarp next to him, but you’re unharmed.
He sits up and scrambles for his penknife. Weak dusk light breaks through the store's shutters, dust motes disturbed by his movements diving between rays of light like lightning bugs. His joints click with the force and speed with which he springs up to protect you. 
What sound was that? It had come as loud as a crack of thunder, but could've been something small, a squirrel over a tree branch. 
He should wake you up. If it's one person, even two, you could help him. But if it's more, and they find you… 
He shoulders open the door and walks out into the morning light. 
— 
You wake to hands on your shoulders. 
You're scared instantly. Steve usually wakes you reluctantly, a shake and a whispered, "Up," or, "Up, baby," if he's especially tired. 
"It's me," he says, his voice burning with something you haven't ever heard before. "It's me. Time to wake up." 
You peel your eyes open, horrified at the sight above you. Steve face hovers over your own with his hair tucked behind his ears and a blazing smile, daylight behind him haloing him in gold. 
"You didn't wake me." You bring clumsy hands to his rough cheeks. "Why didn't you wake me? You look so tired." 
He looks electrified, the bags under his eyes no match for his smile. You can feel it as he leans down, as he plants a kiss firmly to your unsuspecting mouth. He kisses you all over, a joyous chuckle bubbling out between them. 
You laugh yourself, tickled as his stubble scratches your cheeks, your neck as he works his way down. 
"There's- There's people," he says. "My people. Fucking Robin-" 
"What?" 
You're a half inch from headbutting him unconscious. Luckily he's already veering upward, stuffing what you'd left on the ground back into your packs. 
"I haven't seen her yet, but there's this other girl we went to school with, Darcy Mulligan, and she said this is an outpost, right? They keep all this shit here for people who need it, and then they watch to see if you're dangerous-" 
"They were watching us?" 
He plows onward, ignoring you, "And they saw us and I went out thinking they were gonna shoot me but-" 
"Steve, we can't go with these people." 
His smile fades a little. "No, we aren't. I told them already, we aren't that stupid. But," — he grabs your arm — "they said they're gonna bring Robin." 
You don't want to keep fighting him. To shoot down this newfound hope, this lightness you've never seen him shine with before, feels cruel. But you don't want him to get ahead of himself. 
"What if they're bringing back reinforcements?" 
He swallows and nods, reassuring your conjectures. "Right, I thought that too, but- I don't know, baby, Darcy was with a guy, and they both had guns. They could've shot me. 'N' if they were empty, the guy could've just knocked me over the head with it, you know?" He crawls impossibly closer than he'd been, hands rubbing your arm unthinking. "I think this is real." 
I want it to be real goes unsaid. 
You're ashamed that you can't find any excitement to wear with him. Dread licks over your skin as you smile at him, as you cup his cheek in your hand, and as you stand up to help him pack away his things. You feel like you're going to your death. 
Steve can read you well. He grabs your shoulders. You're selfishly hoping he'll say you can run. He doesn't. "You trust me?" he asks. 
You deflate, shoulders falling. "Of course I do." 
"Thank you." He tries to pull you in for a hug but you're reeling, distracted, he has to persuade you, and he does so sweetly. "Hey, c'mere, come on." He pulls at you. "Come here." 
You flop into his chest with all the grace of a shored fish, arms limp. He smells like sweat which probably means you do too, but he smells like himself, and that's what's important. 
"Nothing bad is going to happen to you." 
"What about you?" 
"If Robin's here, I have to take the risk. She's my best friend." 
You understand that. You'd never ask him not to do this, because you'd do it for him. If you'd ever gotten separated, you'd spend months looking for him. Years, maybe. He's the only person left. 
You have no clue if he'd do the same for you.
He scrubs at your back roughly. Such a boyish kind of hug. 
"You have your knife?" he asks. 
You have it. Rather than let them corner you in here, you both make your way out into the woods. Steve shows you the short path he'd taken to find Darcy Mulligan and the man she'd been with, evidence of their stakeout left in the embers of a small fire. You stand frozen with a tree trunk to your back and Steve stations himself in front of you, pack secured on your back. Steve has his baseball bat in hand. What good will it serve against a possible group of gunmen? You start to panic, really panic, and you're a hair's width from begging him to run with you when his grip on the bat falters. 
"Fuck," he says softly. 
Three people turn the corner; a dark haired girl with twin pigtails and a rifle hanging at her side; a boy, presumably the man Steve had mentioned; and a shorter girl with light brown hair, her expression — her entire body — lit with happiness, elation, and her laugh loud enough to prove it. 
"Holy shit," Steve says. 
You forget to be scared. You forget to worry. Steve lets the baseball bat drop out of his hand, and then he's taking three weak steps forward to meet her, and that's it, it's her, Robin throws her arms around his neck and nearly barrels him to the ground. His hands come up to meet her. He's shaking so hard you're surprised he can grip her waist, his face crushed to the side of her head. 
Tears well in your eyes. To get to see this, so soon, when you'd thought maybe Steve might never see his best friend ever again, is a blessing. It's a fucking miracle. 
Your tears bite back when the boy moves forward and hugs him too. 
You tighten your grip on your knife and pull it from your pocket, confused and alarmed that Steve's about to get gutted, but Steve starts to shake worse. 
It takes you a second to realise he's crying. 
"Henderson," he says. 
Oh. It's Dustin. You've heard enough stories about him to know it. He has the same curly hair, and while he's taller than you'd thought, Steve had only ever talked about one Henderson. 
Steve's relief is a knot in your throat. You wipe your cheek quickly with the back of your hand and shove the knife into your pocket. 
Over their heads, the dark haired girl narrows her eyes at you. 
"I can't believe you're here," Steve says, voice raspy with emotion. 
You have never heard him cry. 
"Where have you been, Steve?" Robin asks hoarsely. 
You take a step toward him without thinking, and he hears it despite everything and looks up at you with a teary-eyed smile. 
"We got lost," he says, holding your gaze. 
"Lost? It's been months. We thought you were zombie mulch, you shithead." 
"I'm here, aren't I?" He rolls his eyes at you, like he's saying Get a load of this guy? 
It's a reassuring gesture even if he doesn't mean for it to be. You're still a team. 
"Hi," Robin says, her hands clasped in Steve's shirt, but her attention fully yours. "I'm Robin." 
You don't have a chance to introduce yourself. Steve does it for you, and he says, "She's my girl. Saved me this entire time." 
What the fuck does that mean?
Robin looks at you again. "No fucking way." 
"Only took an apocalypse for Steve to get a girlfriend," Dustin says. 
There's something about their playful arguing that makes you want to cry again. It's the relief they've padded it with. You can imagine how brilliant it must feel to make fun of somebody you'd thought long dead. 
"Don't worry, Y/N," Robin says gravely, "there are tons of dudes at camp. You have options." 
Steve steps on her foot. 
"We should head back," Darcy says shortly. 
On the walk, Steve feels very far away. He keeps looking at you to check you're there, but his thoughts are months ago, recounting the details of your survival to his friends in short. You and Steve had been together since basically the very start when you'd saved him from a horde, and he tells that with pride. So much so you feel heat blooming behind your neck and at the tips of your ears. 
"We fucking floored to to the meeting point but you guys weren't there-" 
"Sorry-" 
"No, it's okay," he says. "I get it. It was rough." All of you shiver at the memory. Hawkins had been hit hard, a close knit town with nowhere to hide.
"No we- we should’ve fucking waited- I begged them to wait," Robin says. 
"Who did you get out with?" 
And there's the list of survivors. It's short. The amount of orphaned kids is extremely depressing, and for a while there's silence. All those people. Dustin's mom, Robin's dad. 
"Hopper's here, though," Dustin adds after a while.
"That explains why you're still alive." 
"Actually, dickhead, we're alive because I'm awesome. The radio-" 
"How many people are there?" Steve interrupts. 
"It's a whole new world, Harrington." 
It's better. 
You turn onto what looks like an old college campus and suddenly, there's people. So many people you walk backward and almost tumblr off of the curb, because fuck. There's noise, and smells, and sounds. There are little kids running around in a closed off area of the quad, laughing and chasing after one another. There are guns on guards patrolling makeshift walls. 
Your ears start ringing. 
"Think your girlfriend's gonna pass out," Darcy says. 
You're the last one to figure out she's talking about you. 
"Oh, hey. Hey," Steve says, stepping toward you. 
You take another step back. 
"Baby," he says softly. 
"There's people here." 
"So many new boyfriend's to choose from," he jokes. He's tentative, but he offers his hand like he knows you'll take it. "Come on. I promise I won't get jealous when you run off with somebody cooler." 
"I don't want somebody cooler," you say. 
"Okay, awesome, 'cause I was lying. I'd be super jealous. I'd feed myself to the geeks." 
"Don't say that." 
He grins at you, hand hovering in the gap between your bodies unwavering. Trust me, it says. Nothing bad is going to happen to you. 
You take Steve's hand. 
The world is more than you and Steve against it. There are people to answer to. 
Chief Hopper actually recognises you when he sees you. He recognises Steve first, and he gives him a pat on the back. You aren't expecting any hellos, figuring you're barely a memory to him, but Hopper smiles at you like you've just told him you have the antidote for zombification in your rucksack. 
"It's good to see you, kid."
That night, in the dining hall, you get a small welcome between shift announcements. Hundreds of heads turn your way, and while some house cagey unsurety, the majority are happy to see you. 
You sit with Steve and his friends (plural, a growing number, because nearly all of them are here), torn between stopping him from crying his eyes out with happy tears and listening to the older woman sitting beside you. Her name is Mallory, and she offers a generous gift. 
"You have any questions at all, sweetpea, and you can come to me. Or if you just wanna talk, my shoulder's right here." She pats it for emphasis. 
"Thank you so much." But, you want to say, I have Steve.
"Young love, and in a time like this." Mallory's smile is genuine, if a little haunted. "It's amazing." 
You indulge her, turning from Steve just slightly. "But?" 
She brushes a strand of hair behind her ears. It's three colours, a faded red at the middle, a mix of grey and brown at the top. "Listen, I have some unsolicited advice for you hon, but I'm not trying to offend you when you just got here." 
You shake your head. "No," you say hurriedly, "of course not. I wouldn't think that." 
She digs around in her pocket and opens her hand covertly under the table. When you look at it, she hisses. "No, don't. Keep your eyes up." 
You right your gaze accordingly. The canteen is simply that — the college's canteen. Every night there's something cooking, and every morning if they can afford it. Although you'd been told some people eat at home, most people come here, because this is the only place with a reliable generator. From where you're sitting, you can see everybody, and you suspect Steve had chosen this vantage point on purpose. 
Hopper stands at the front of the room behind another man, who's moved from the important stuff and is now lamenting at the book club's low attendance. They have a fucking book club. You can't believe it. 
Mallory drops something into your hand. A hard-boiled candy.
"My advice," she says, the two of you watching as Hopper and the second man confer, "is to try and be in both worlds at once." 
"You've lost me." 
"That's not a good sign, I've barely started," she jokes, laughing so much that the men sitting across from you laugh too. She carries on, "What I mean is, this isn't home. It probably never will be. We fight so hard to make it home, we plant trees, 'n' we sleep warm every night, but…" She squeezes your shoulder amicably, a light, quick touch. "I know how it felt when I got here. Me and my husband, we kept to ourselves. And we were right to, not everybody here can be good. But when he died, I had nobody." 
You let your eyes drop to you plate, a small portion of a soup that's not the best and a sandwich that's marginally better. You get what Mallory's trying to say — don't put your eggs all in one basket, not when the basket might get mauled to death any day coming. 
You get what she's trying to say. You don't appreciate it. 
"Thank you," you say weakly. 
She nods, and Steve saves you from anymore conversation with an arm hooked through yours. 
“You okay?” he asks. Unmistakably fond. 
You can feel the eyes of all of his friends. All these people you knew too, or knew of, and should be happy to see. You should be so fucking happy right now. 
So why aren’t you?
You turn your face to his and take him in. He’s got a red rash of skin over the top of his head from prolonged sunburn and a scar under his left eye from a cruel tree branch. He looks different than the Steve you’d met at school, and he looks different still from the Steve you’d saved on day 1. 
But he’s your Steve. 
You drop your forehead into his neck, love like a warm blanket encapsulating you when he presses a kiss against your forehead. 
“I know,” he says, moving back, forcing you to sit up again. “It’s crazy.”
You return his smile, though you aren’t sure you're on the same page. 
Little Hawkins makes you want to curl up into a ball and cry. It’s a floor of rooms in the campus dormitories, and Robin shares with a couple of other people your age. She only has a mattress and her things on the ground in one room, but soon Steve and another guy are dragging another mattress from across campus while you watch. 
"No offence," Steve says, "but I'm trying to spoil you right now. Can you stop pouting? I'm giving you a breather." 
"I don't believe you." 
He and the unnamed man lean the mattress up outside of Robin's door. 
"Well," he says warmly, and you're starting to feel lovesick with how sweet he's being, nearly enough to forget how scared you are, "maybe you should try." 
Steve is nice. He's always been nice, ever since you met him, even if that nice was strapped down and buried under one layer of derision, one layer of sarcasm, and another layer of sternness for prosperity. But this is another level. Ever since he woke you up he's been ridiculous (he's been the kind of affectionate you've secretly ached for). Steve's sparing with affection but you wouldn't ever complain — can you expect him to play doting boyfriend when each day he's hardwired and on the fritz trying to make sure you both don't die agonising, gross deaths? 
This is fucking crazy, though. 
Steve pulls you bodily by the waist into his front and talks into the highest point of your cheek, words muffled by your skin, "When was the last time we slept on a mattress? Gotta be months ago," — you lean into him entirely, he takes your weight with zero qualms — "when we were in that house by the lake with all the soaps." 
"So many soaps," you murmur, melted by his closeness. 
He laughs. He giggles, all boyish and pretty and you can't help yourself, you lift your chin, practically begging for a kiss. 
You get a short one. Steve's too busy laughing. "And the canned pickles. I know they were, like, doomsdayers, but what did we count, like-" 
"Fifty seven-" 
"Fifty seven jars of pickles," he finishes. 
If this is what Steve is like here, you can make the trade. You don't trust anybody that isn't him, and it feels like you're surrounded by people who could easily hurt you, but his easy joy right now is contagious. 
Robin's voice comes loud from inside her room. "Hey, lovebirds! Are you coming in? They turn all the lights off in like, twenty minutes." 
It's obvious how much Steve trusts Robin. You get the mattress in her room through a series of squeezing and hoping, and she shows you her fancy little sink with running water, nothing short of pride in her eyes. 
"It's freezing," she says, "but you can wash up." 
It genuinely doesn't bother you that it's cold, emotionally. Physically you get the jitters, and it's worth it because Steve pities you and wraps you up tight to rub your arms. He and Robin talk a lot, so much that your brain has given up on listening. It's not something you're happy to hear anyhow, your perilous journey. Steve is generous on your account, leaving out all your most embarrassing moments. 
You sit on the end of the mattress and wonder if you can take your shoes off. 
"Robin?" you ask. 
Both turn to look at you, surprised. 
"Yeah?" 
"Does the door lock?"
She brings her legs up to her chest, chin on her knees. "There's no deadbolt, but you need a key to open it from the outside. So kind of?" She watches you for a moment, and then she nods towards the desk covered in books. "I used to put the chair under the handle when I first got here. You can do that, if you're worried." 
You nod uselessly and get up to do just that. 
"Thanks, Robs," Steve says. 
"Yep." She flops into a ball on her side and pulls the blankets up and over her face. "Goodnight, then." 
Steve laughs and steps over your legs so he can get to her. "Robin," he says, pulling the blankets down. "I- I really missed you." 
She holds out her arms and they hug. She pats his back. "Missed being a pain in my neck, maybe," she mutters. He pushes away from her in mock disgusts and they smile, a shared smile that douses you in an unfair jealousy. You shrug it off pretty quickly when he sits down on the mattress beside you, looking content and, shockingly, really tired. 
He encourages you up to the top of the mattress beside him and folds up the blanket from the rucksack for you as a pillow, sliding it under your head. When he seems confident that you're comfortable he blows out the candle burning on Robin's desk. 
This part's easy, you and Steve in the dark. You're practised in the art of moving around one another. 
Your heart pounds in your ears as Steve pulls a heavy blanket over the both of you, his arm strewn across your stomach haphazardly. 
"Are you okay?" he whispers. 
You turn your face to his though you can't see it. "Of course I am. Are you okay?" 
"I know this is weird." 
Weird doesn't feel like the right word. Surreal, maybe. Something out of a dream. 
"I think my back aches more on the mattress, I'm so used to twisting myself into knots between your legs." 
He snorts. "That doesn't sound right." 
You cover his arm with your hand. "Pig." 
"You can lie on my chest, if you want." 
"Think it's your turn to use me as cushioning." Your voice is coloured by your smile. 
He exhales into your shoulder. 
"Mm. This is nice," he murmurs. 
"You want me to take the first shift?" 
"I don't think we need shifts." 
You can't agree. Steve trusts Robin and you trust Steve, but you do not trust Robin. She seems lovely, and through Steve's stories you know she's a good person, but he hasn't seen her in a year. She could be anybody, and she's locked into a room with you.
You don't mean to be deceitful. "Alright," you utter, "no shifts." 
"You smell nice," Steve says. His lips move against your skin, and he lifts his head enough to kiss your jaw, three kisses in succession. "Goodnight, honey." 
You raise your hand to his head. "Goodnight." 
He falls asleep to you carding through his hair. Even when you're sure he's dead to the world you keep going, the feeling of it between your fingers calming. 
You don't sleep a wink. 
It becomes a mantra. Steve is happy here. Over and over and over. 
You're happy too by consequence; Steve is a new person, still the man you know but with this emanating happiness rolling off of him in waves. 
Chief Hopper has promised to get you and Steve a place together if you want one. This had scared you half to death, because you want one bad, but you'd been expecting a little resistance from Steve (or, admittedly, a lot). Because… 
You're starting to think maybe you aren't scared of the people here. You trust Hopper to run a community that's safe if he says it is, and as the days stretch into a week, two weeks, you start to feel secure. Steve's never far, but that's the terrifying part. 
You're worried Steve is going to leave you. 
It sounds dramatic. It is dramatic. But you're scared shirtless that Steve is going to wake up and realise he doesn't owe you a thing, that he doesn't harbour the affection for you that he thinks he does. You're worried that Steve had gone soft on you because you'd been there, like a habit. 
Your feelings for him only grow, despite this. He's fucking handsome when he's clean-shaven, clean in general. Somebody's mom gives him a haircut and you can't believe it, because he's always been good looking but you can tell he's more confident like this, and the confidence makes him golden. 
He's also super handsy. 
You love it, and you get it. You know you look prettier clean, even more so after somebody's mom gives you a haircut and you've managed to scrub the perma-dirt from under your nails. The want to kiss him is dialled up by a thousand because you always have clean teeth.  
The nagging fear remains even when he's got a mouthful of your neck. 
"Ouch," you moan, hands in his hair, legs spread enough to accommodate his figure between them, "s'like a geek, nibbling on me." 
Steve bites a little harder. 
You gasp at his show of force and push your head away from him. "Steve," you say with a laugh.
"Sorry, sorry," he apologises, pulling back. Elbows at your ribs, he holds his weight off of you though there's no reason to. "My teeth missed you." 
"What the fuck." 
"All of me missed you." He strokes the side of your face mildly. "I hate this." 
You wiggle under him, mattress springs digging into your back. He doesn't bother explaining what he'd meant, only leans down to kiss your cheek, your chin, the tip of your nose. 
You stare at him. 
"What do you hate?" 
He scrunches his nose up like it's obvious, and you're stupid for not knowing. "Us being on separate schedules. It's fucking shitty." 
You don't have an answer for him. It seems more than lucky that he would assuage your worst feelings considering you haven't told him anything at all. You haven't told him about staying up at night to make sure Robin's not gonna kill him, or how worried you are that he's gonna realise he can leave you now you're safe, now you don't owe each other anything. You haven't told him how much you love him, and how much that would hurt. 
Somehow, you get the impression that he knows anyway. 
"This is really nice," you say eventually. 
He rests his face against yours. You close your eyes. 
"What's nice?" he asks. "Our separation? You're sick, babe. I'm trying to bare my heart here and you're stomping all over it." 
"Not our separation, dummy. This. You lying on top of me. It feels really nice." 
His small laugh warms your cheek. "I know. Why'd you think I let you climb all over me for months?" 
"'Cause otherwise we'd freeze to death?" 
He kisses a line down to the skin under your ear. "That, too. But mostly because it feels good." 
You wrap your arms around him and press your nose to his hair, smelling him for your own self-indulgence. He lets his weight press down on you, shifting his arm so they're digging behind your shoulders. 
You hook a leg behind his. 
"Steve, I…" 
"I love you." 
You stiffen. 
He hugs you that tiny bit tighter. "I love you," he says again. "I should've told you before, but I- I was so afraid that you'd-" He clears his throat quietly. "I was fucking terrified that I was going to let you down. You kept almost dying on me, and I kept realising I wouldn't be able to do this without you." 
"I love you too," you say, shell-shocked. 
He kisses your cheek slowly, softly, and then he lifts himself up so you're face to face. 
"I love you," you say, because he'd said it twice. 
His smile is gentle, eyes creased with a loving amusement. "I know." Steve steals back one of his arms so he can thumb under your eye. "I know you're not sleeping." 
"Steve-" 
"No, listen. I know you don't trust Robin-" 
"I do-" 
"You don't, and it's okay." He cups your cheek. "It's okay. You know, Hopper said it wouldn’t take long to find us a room. A couple more days and you won’t have to worry. And you know I wouldn’t let anything happen to you.”
“I know,” you say, voice softening to match his own. 
He squeezes your cheek. “There’s a lot of stuff I should say to you and I’m kind of trying to hang onto my last shred of dignity here, but I mean it. More than I’ve ever- More than anyone. I love you.”
Your lips fall into a self-pitying pout. You won’t cry, though you feel like you could, because this is possibly the happiest you’ve ever been in your life. Steve loves you more than anyone, plain as day. He wouldn’t say that if he were going to swap you out for a new apocalypse girlfriend anytime soon, ‘cause Steve doesn’t mess with feelings. He’s earnest. 
“Ever since we got here, I’ve been waiting for you to break up with me,” you say. 
Which is funny in itself. You and Steve kissed each other every now and then for weeks before you had the conversation — it feels juvenile to think of boyfriends and girlfriends in life or death, and, paradoxically, it feels really important. The label means a lot to you. The ‘I love you’ means the world, even if he’s been showing it everyday since he met you. 
He makes a sound that’s a combination of a scoff, a snort, and a pitying sigh. “You’re ridiculous,” he says. 
You laugh so loudly it surprises you both. “I’m ridiculous? Get off of me, rich boy.”
Steve hunkers down. “What? No way. I live here now.”
“Seriously, Harrington, get off. I'm sick of you. Robin promised she’d find me a new boyfriend. Maybe I’ll get one with compassion.”
He laughs. He’s trying not to, and it comes out warm and soft to spite him. “Fine, let’s break up.”
“Fine.”
He tilts his head toward yours until your foreheads are touching, staring into your eyes. It takes a lot of willpower to hold in your laugh. “Wanna go on a date with me?”
You lift your chin and kiss him through giggles. “Yeah, okay. Options are pretty limited here, anyway.”
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slvttysstuff · 9 months
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REBOUND
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Rebound (jay jo x reader)
Warnings: grammatical errors, typos, angst
Summar: months after shelly and jay broke up he found himself in a relationship with you while he hasn't moved on yet from his past lover (shelly)
⊹¤.•⨳•.*☆✬✬☆*.•⨳•.¤⊹٭
Jay and shelly broke up after jay found out that Shelly was having a relationship with someone that lives in England also, he was devastated he felt betrayed by the girl he loves the most, you and crew mates that were also your friend are there to comfort him, you were there since you two were kids, you two were super close not until shelly appeared in the picture, and unfortunately, they got together, so as for someone who respects their relationship, you distance yourself from the two of them and when the two of them broke up jay found you and went to find comfort on your side.
2 months after the break up, jay and you started dating, when your friends finds out about it they were happy for the two of you, you thought that he already moved on from shelly, but you were wrong, you caught him looking at shelly's insta where she post her new lover and also her pictures, you also saw those old pictures that jay and shelly had before at his phone, when you confronted him about it he just shrugged it off saying ' I just forgot to delete it', even your friends minu, Dom and the others noticed it they tried talking to jay about it but jay just ignored them.
You were currently at jay's house eating along with his mother, his mother knew you since you were kids so when she knew that you two were dating she was more than happy along with Kay his little brother " so how are you two? Are you two working out? " Her mom asked while eating, you thought jay would answer her but he didn't " oh yes, we are " I answered with a smile on my face " good then, I dont like the girl he's with back then, that blondie? At first look I already knew that she will hurt my son and I wasn't wro-" jay's mother was cutted off by jay
" can you stop talking about Shelly like that mom? " Jay commented, making her mom and me looked at him, ' why is he mad about that? ' I thought " what? I was just telling the truth " her mom said " that girl cheated on you remember? Why are you defending her? " Jay's mother argue " I'm not defending her." jay said but it doesn't look like what he said, he was completely defending Shelly's side as I was silent there the whole time, I lost my appetite to finish my food but I still tried, I don't want to be rude in front of the table and food
" I thought you've already moved on from that girl? Do you think Y/n willbe happy hearing this? the fact that you're defending that girl who hurt you jay? " Her mom kept saying making jay stood up " I'm done eating, I'll go to my room " jay said not wanting to talk with his mom anymore, as you looked at him following every movements he does, he didn't wait for her mom to say something and left, Mrs Jo could only sigh at his sons behaviour as she looks at me " I'm sorry dear " she said as she holds my hand " it's fine auntie, I'll talk to him " i said as i stood up and excused myself, I walked to jay's room, knocking before i opened the door and entered his room
Jay was on his computer, his back was facing me, " jay.." I called out for him, I only heard him humm, I closed the door and sat on the end of his bed " let's talk " I said looking at his back " about what? " He asked as he turns around to looked at me, I can't even read his face nor his emotions..
Silence filled the air first before I let out a long sigh " I want you to be honest with me " I started " you still lover her don't you? " I said as I looked at him wanting for him to answer but all he gave me was silence, his shoulder tensed a little
" I don't " he answered
" I said be honest with-"
" I gave you my answer y/n I said I don't " he cutted me off, looking at me directly, I chuckled bitterly as I looked down, tears were trying to fall already " then tell me the reason you acted like that earlier " I said, he stopped for a minute before he looked away " are we going to talk about it here too? " He stated, he was completely trying to pushed away the topic
" then explain to me the time I caught you several times looking at her account? Looking at the picture of you two? I asked you about it remember? You said you just forgot to delete it, the times you were about to call me shelly but realized it immediately.." I said, he onced again tensed up he knew he was caught already and he can't tell any excuses any more " now tell me jay " tears were now falling down in my eye
" I-I.. " jay try to say something but he couldn't came up the right words to say it " just tell me if you still love her jay " I said as I cried " y/n- " "Jay please! Don't make this hard for the both of us! " I yelled but I didn't get an answer to him as it went silent once again
" I still do..."
jay muttered his head was hung up low, I chuckled bitterly after I heard his answer " I knew it " I said, I looked at the other side of his room not wanting to looked at him " what about me? " I asked, jay looked at me, his eyes shows how sorry he was " Do you..." I stopped first, I was scared to hear his next answer " do you even loved me? " I asked, jay didn't think other wise and answered " o-ofcourse " he stutter " you loved me? But you still won't let go of your past? " I muttered " why did you even pursue me at the first place jay? " I asked I was so confused right now, he loves me but he can't moved on? What the fuck is that? What kind of excuse was that?!
" you made me feel so special when I'm with you, I thought being with you will make my feelings for shelly to fade away" " I thought once I try to fall once again I'll forget her, please I'm really sorry I swear I love you y/n, listen to me " jay explained as he tried to hold my hands but I immediately pulled away, I made him feel special but he couldn't make me feel like one, i want to say more to him i want to blame him for making me fall for him, for hurting me, for making me feel useless, for making me wait for him to love me, for making me feel dumb, idiot about his feelings that wasn't even true
I want to tell him everything....
" So I was just your rebound? " I mumbled, I chuckled as I stood up wiping my wet hands in my pants, jay stood up also trying to say something as he moved forward to hold me" y/n no-" he tried to talked but I cutted him " enough jay... "
" Let's end this.." after saying those words, I went outside his room leaving him there all alone I heard him calling me but I didn't listen, I was so fucking hurt that I don't want to see him for the meantime, I went downstairs, his mom saw me as she called me " hey dear how was your talk with jay? " She said making me stop in my tracks as I faced her mother giving her a small fake smile ' it doesn't go as I thought auntie, your son still loves his past' " it went fine auntie, I'll go home now auntie thank you for the food " I said taking my bag at the living room where Kay was there sitting while watching his favourite show " bye noona! " He called out as I bid my farewell to him before going out of their house, and that's where I find myself breaking down my heart was shattered, how could jay do that to me, all I did was give him love but I guess my love wasn't enough for him....
Feel free to request if you want a part 2^_^
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