#Elopement

[burntoutpaladin]

I got married and turns out my wife and I are the hottest people alive.

(A blacksmith friend of hers made me a longsword and twin daggers for her for our wedding.)

(I'm a paladin, she's a rogue.)

[zebulontheplanet]

I elope. I elope when I’m scared. I elope when I’m happy. I elope with any emotion.

When I’m out in public I’m very prone to wondering. This is elopement. I wonder off from the people I’m with, I get lost, etc.

it isn’t necessarily a bad thing because I am able to use a phone to text or call the people I’m with to get back to them, but it is weird that sometimes I have to remind myself that I have to stay with the person I’m with and not just wonder around.

Elopement is very common with higher support needs people and can put us in dangerous situations. It’s not just “oops I wondered off” quirky type shit. No. I need to stay with my family at basically all times. It is important that I do so or it can be dangerous.

Don’t undermine elopement.

[eirene]

The Elopement, 1893

Edmund Blair Leighton

[call-me-strega]

Dc x Dp Prompt #16: Let me Steal You Away

Eldritch Fae-like Danny accidentally seduces Jason and steals him away from Gotham but in less a “Hades and Persephone” way and more of a “we eloped and moved to the suburbs” way

[gwydion-aacblog]

want take word elope away from low support autism people who think is just way doctors call autism things bad , when really elope is reason that people like gwydion put on harness as kid because not understand danger and would wander run just because could sometimes . is why many autism kids drown or get hit or other awful awful things .

think harness and things should not be only way try keep kid safe , think family responsibility also try teach safe rules , but but but important very important remember not all people can learn those rules equally so things like harness is what able do to keep safe while still bring out give some movement .

( sometimes also would and sometimes still do elope because distress . is also important family learn how handle that best possible can so brain not feel need elope in first place . little different topic need more thought time so not say too much now . )

[sturmsucht]

The woods are her home and it is colourful. By Sturmsucht Pixelfed | Instagram | Homepage

[fanfic-obsessed]

Fundemental Cultural Misunderstanding

Can I just say that there is so much humor potential in Star as far as cultural misunderstandings go. 

Try this AU on for size. 

-Note:Though it is not necessary for this idea, it is important to me for you to know that in this world Anakin did not slaughter the Tuskens. He reached Shimi in time to save her and his focus was getting her to safety. Thus his relationship with Padme is much healthier.-

Anakin on a fundamental, and somewhat deliberate, level misunderstands some parts of Jedi culture. He believes that Jedi cannot get married.  In this world, this is not true.  

Marriage in this Jedi culture includes a marriage bond between all parties that, if not set up correctly, can do a fair amount of damage (and even when set up correctly doesn’t provide more than a sense of the other person's physical condition and emotions; rarely bonded might be compatible enough that that they can track each other through the bond). This is particularly true if one of the parties is not Force sensitive, or one of the parties is particularly Force Sensitive. So there is a lot of pomp and ceremony around getting married in the Jedi tradition to make sure the bond is correctly set up. Also consent is such a large portion of Jedi culture, so extra pains are taken to make sure non force sensitives understand what such a bond might mean…to the point where it freaks out most non force sensitives.  This all culminates in, by the time of the prequels, most Jedi just don’t get married.

-It should also be noted that marriage as a legal institution and marriage as a cultural institution are actually two very different things, though they are often conflated. Marriage as a legal institution means absolutely nothing to Jedi, and in fact many cultures, because the rights granted by the legal institution of marriage either don’t apply to Jedi or are covered by other Jedi related laws.-

This is also misunderstood by the Galaxy at large.  Also, because of this misunderstanding most cultures do not discuss their marriage customs with Jedi, sure it might come up organically but no one thinks that this is a cultural norm that the Jedi need to know. Which means as much as the Galaxy misunderstands the Jedi’s marriage customs, the Jedi misunderstand most other cultures' marriage customs as well.  In fact the Jedi, through generations of a benign misunderstanding, believe that most cultures will not discuss their marriage customs with Jedi, so all they can go on is their own observations. 

Picture if you will, little padawans vibrating their way into the Archives, up to the nearest archivist, who drops everything because the little Padawan wants to report that they ATTENDED A WEDDING. 

This leads to the archives being chock full of conflicting information about the various marriage customs throughout the galaxy, because anything that happens at a wedding now becomes a TRADITION of that planet, even things might be just a preference of the people marrying, or even a happenstance. The Jedi have all collectively agreed that they are just gonna roll with it, no matter how strange the custom or if it contradicts anything else (It is not like they can get information directly from the source after all).

Now when Anakin got married to Padme, he thought that Jedi cannot marry.  He thinks that his elopement would have to be a secret. He does not realize that he broadcasted his joy at marrying Padme to every Force Sensitive in the galaxy (no seriously, there are Force Sensitives on planets that don’t even have space flight yet, on the other side of the galaxy that felt an abrupt and incomprehensible wave of utter joy-some of those were physiologically incapable of feeling joy like near humans and had to lay down for a while). Also, not that he realized it, the part of his Force Signature (which Jedi are taught in the creche how to read) that deals with identity flashed with the equivalent neon lighted dashboard in Times Square that he was ‘Mr. Padme Naberrie’ from that point forward. 

So when Anakin leaves on a mission, unmarried, and comes back very married, but clearly hiding it, it is quickly noticed. But no one thinks that it is Anakin who does not trust them. Of course not, he is family. They decide that this must be some heretofore unknown Naboo marriage TRADITION, elopement followed by hiding the marriage. 

No one, not a single jedi in 10,000, thought to ask Anakin directly. 

Several Archivists promptly write some very well written papers on this tradition, and how it fits into their other knowledge, basically filling in the gaps to create a tradition out of whole cloth (even though they are acting in earnest). 

The war still starts, with all that entrails. But every Jedi knows about Anakin’s ���secret’ marriage. The little ones all giggle about it. Most are eagerly waiting for the tradition of hiding to be complete, because surely ‘The Man Without Fear’ and his wife would also want to marry in the Jedi tradition.  There was so little to be excited about these days that everyone bought into this notion, even those that had long decided they would not go through the process of the Jedi Marriage. 

The children in the creche insist on making decorations for the eventual Jedi Wedding.  In fact there were multiple sets of decorations, depending on where the happy couple wanted the ceremony performed. Just rooms and rooms of decorations and drawings and artwork of all kinds. 

The High Council, including Obi wan, started researching to make sure they knew all the steps and traditions for the Wedding backwards and forwards whenever they had the chance. The last time a Jedi Wedding had been performed was 200 years earlier and enough had happened since that even those who were alive during that time were a bit fuzzy on the details.  They wanted to be ready to support Anakin and Padme in any way possible.  Padme’s biometrics are quietly added to the Temple’s banks; ready to be activated as soon as the couple is ready. A plan is put together so that Padme can be quickly evacuated if there was an active threat against Anakin specifically, or Jedi adjacent beings in general. 

And the Archivists are practically having duels to see who would get to speak to the happy couple once the period of hiding is done. There is hope throughout the archives that maybe, if they ask really nicely, Padme would be willing to answer a few questions on Naboo marriage traditions (All the Archivists want to learn so badly, all they want to do is be able to learn. Can they please learn).

Perhaps if it had gone on much longer someone would have cottoned on to how stressed this secret was making Anakin. Maybe not.  Perhaps this world still could have ended in unimaginable tragedy. 

Perhaps in another world like this. In this world, we look to humor instead of horror. 

A little over a year into the war several of the youngling clans, ages ranging from about 4-6, got to go on a tour of the Senate.  One of the younglings (Age 4, species was Sabetue and was genderless) got separated and couldn’t find a clone guard or anyone they recognized. They were wandering and scared, but somehow made it up to the level where Padme’s office is. And the Youngling recognized Padme’s Force signature as Master Skywalker’s wife, so they knew they would be safe with her.  

So now Padme has a small Jedi child in her office. Thankfully she was not in a meeting. She manages to get a hold of the Guard, who send up two of creche masters, who had been beside themselves with worry.  While in her office the child said things that made it clear that the child knew about Padme’s marriage to Anakin and how they couldn’t wait to see how pretty she would be in the Jedi Wedding.  One of the Crechemasters very gently reminded the child that Anakin and Padme might decide not to get married in the Jedi Tradition, that it had to be their choice and followed up with:

“And if we forced them���”

The child piped back with a solemn “we would be meanies”

One of the creche masters brought the child back down to the group while the other remained behind. First to thank Padme for finding their lost child. Then also to apologize for the child breaking the Hiding Tradition, expressing a hope that this would not have any negative impact on Padme’s marriage. 

The Crechmaster seemed so proud at saying ‘Hiding Tradition’ that Padme did not have the heart to tell them that she had no idea what they were talking about (they are very proud of remembering what the Archivists were calling this tradition).  They continue to have a brief conversation where Padme learned a number of things:

The Jedi, every single one of them, knew about Padme’s marriage.

They are all, every single one of them, actively supportive instead of the at best disapproving she thought they would be.

The Jedi somehow believe that Padme and Anakin are hiding their marriage over a Naboo Tradition

There are rooms full of crafts created specifically to decorate for her wedding in the Jedi Tradition created by hordes of earnest younglings. 

The Jedi are very into consent. 

Anakin is not due back on Coruscant for another week, and during that week Padme made discrete inquiries (oddly enough these are actually discrete) that told her nothing important about what was going on and driving her to distraction. So Anakin comes back to Padme nearly screaming at him ‘Why do the Jedi think we are hiding our marriage over a Naboo tradition?’

Anakin very much does not know but suggests that they ask the Chancellor (Anakin has very much been conditioned by the Chancellor to turn to him first in any instance of confusion).

Padme stares at him for a moment, tells him that is a stupid idea and to call Obi Wan.

Anakin does not want to call Obi Wan. He does not want to tell Obi Wan about their marriage and get in trouble. 

Padme stares at him with the dead eyes of someone dealing with too much ridiculous information at once, then says ‘Call Kenobi’.

Anakin obeys. 

Obi Wan comes over, they all sit down and Padme very calmly tells Obi Wan that she and Anakin are married. Obi Wan immediately begins radiating blinding excitement.  He congratulates them and starts to ask about having a Jedi wedding before deflating again and asking if not pretending he was surprised would ruin anything. He offers to go out and they can do it again, he can pretend to be shocked. 

Padme reassures him. Anakin starts to express his surprised (in a way that would have made it really clear about why he was hiding his marriage) but Padme quickly interrupts him, asking about Jedi Wedding traditions and lets Obi Wan ramble really happily about the research that the High Council had been doing to make sure they can recreate those traditions if Padme and Anakin want.

Obi Wan leaves with a promise that Padme and Anakin would come to speak with the High Council to make sure all the legalities (making sure everything is set up so that Padme can come and go as she pleases at the temple, and have a login to access the Archives, and would it be possible for her to come in for a baseline check up so that medical their records are up to date) are taken care of. As soon he is gone Padme grabs Anakin by the collar and goes ‘we can never tell them’

Anakin goes ‘what?’ 

‘We can never tell the Jedi why we were hiding our marriage. I’ll contact my parents as soon as it is morning on Naboo. They can back us up. We can say it is an old family tradition to hide the marriage for the first year. It isn’t used much, but after being in the public eye and with the War I was feeling superstitious, ok?’

Anakin goes ‘What, Why?’

Padme shakes at the arm in her hand, ‘telling the other Jedi that you didn’t trust them with your marriage would break their hearts. Do you want to be the reason small children are crying?’

Anakin looked far too considering for Padme's piece of mind, and what little sanity she had left. 

‘Let me put it this way, do you want to be what finally break’s Obi wan’s heart? That man was vibrating with excitement to celebrate our wedding so hard I could feel in the Force.’

Anakin deflated, ‘Oh. No.’

Padme’s parents laugh their ass off that she needs to create a long held family tradition because she doesn’t want to admit to the Jedi that she had thought they would react badly to her marriage.  They agree to do it. 

<Somehow this does derail Palpatine’s plans. Personally I want it to be in a way that leaves people unaware that he is a Sith, so for the rest of his life he needs to maintain the kindly old grandpa look and suffer for it- maybe something that means he has to actually live a clean life; no more crime or torturing for him.>

Twenty four years later Obi Wan helps Leia Naberrie meet up with Han Solo in order to Elope in the long held family tradition (Bringing with them only R2 to follow the actual tradition closer than they realize). Obi Wan very carefully leaves before Han arrives, so that he can truthfully say he does not know that they eloped. 

Leia’s twin Luke does not need to elope, as he followed his Uncle Obi Wan into the Jedi (an unrelated note he also followed Obi Wan into the mindset of ‘Why Monogamy when Harems naturally occur’-From that day the war ends Obi Wan has no less than three clones with him at all times; he also appears to have a lover, a friend, or an antagonist that he has weirdly sexual dialogue with on every planet he visits. Or Hondo Ohnaka, who has a category all his own. The years that Boba Fett comes to the holiday meals as one of Luke’s plus 6’s-He couldn't choose just one and no one would think of making him- are among the most awkward of most of their lives.)

[xiaq]

So we got our elopement pictures back.

[bethanydelleman]

Greetings! My today's question is: how scandalous is it to elope and marry in Gretna Green? What consequences does the couple face? Edmund's reaction to Julia's elopement seems to indicate that it's pretty bad, though definitely not as bad as Maria's folly: "At any other time this would have been felt dreadfully. Now it seems nothing; yet it is an heavy aggravation."

Remember that the Bertrams are on the conservative side of moral beliefs, so they aren't the best meter for judging how scandalous something really is to the wider public.

Here are my thoughts:

Obeying your parents was a big part of the moral system of the Regency and elopement is a defiance of your parents. You are acting without their permission or approbation. Given that "honour your mother and father" is the 5th commandment in the Bible and the first one that applies to how we treat other people, it's a big deal (yes, it's before "don't murder")

It's stupid, so society makes it taboo. As a woman, it's a huge risk. If you elope and never marry, you are ruined (the fear with Lydia). If you are an heiress, you marry without a proper legal agreement (marriage articles) and your husband can steal and squander your wealth (the fear with Georgiana). Marriage articles protected women. Lydia's eventual one gives her £1000 that Wickham cannot touch. That is so important for her! Things like a jointure (basically survivor's benefit) were also put in the marriage articles. For Robert Ferrars and Julia Bertram, the risk of elopement was that they may not be accepted back into their families. Given their financial situations, this wasn't a huge risk, but it would be something that would make life difficult for them going forward. Connections are everything!

Both of these things matter so much because marriage is basically permanent. It's not a mistake you can just undo and make up with your parents. I believe there were post-marriage articles that were possible, but if your husband wouldn't sign, you were screwed. Divorce was prohibitively expensive and the criteria were very strict. So marriage shouldn't be a decision of passion without forethought. It's a big deal!

As Mary Crawford points out, if you give good dinners a lot of people will accept you no matter what, but respectable families may shun you.

So to sum up, it's taboo and frowned upon because it's dangerous. To me, it kind of seems like the way we view smoking today. And I think different families would have varied reactions to it, some may cut their children off forever, some may reconcile after a few years, or they may decide to accept the marriage for social reasons (not losing another child like Sir Thomas or to save their reputation like the Bennets)

[terijugni]

Umar naazuk hai aur waqt kam. Sambhal jaayein? Ya kahin door nikal jaayein?

[kanthonyficrecs]

Featured Fic (Canon Divergence)

the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand by absolutehorror

Rating: E

Summary: He never expected to see Kathani Sharma at his door. Months ago, Lord Sheffield approached him about arranging a marriage between Anthony and his granddaughter, the diamond of the season. Tired of his mother's hints and attempts at match making, Anthony had considered it. Until he met Kate, Kathani, the older sister of his would-be wife.

[zebulontheplanet]

Hello, I saw your post about elopement and wanted to ask: how would you like to be treated/cared for when you elope?

I ask because I am an autistic who has not experienced elopement and I’m trying to learn more about it, but all the resources I can find, as usual, are catered to parents of toddlers and have no autistic adult input.

Feel free to not answer or to correct any ignorance on my part, I’m here to listen.

Hello! I know this is late. But I thought this was an important question that had to be answered.

So, how would I like to be treated with elopement? Kindly. If you notice an autistic person wondering around, being confused, looking lost, then it’s ok in my opinion to stop them and ask if they’re ok or if they’re lost. It’s better safe than sorry.

I’ve never been in a situation where I’ve eloped and gotten recognized by strangers. However, here’s some things that I’d like to see from someone if I eloped and was caught by a stranger.

If you find the person, and it’s confirmed their lost, look for an ID bracelet, or a temporary tattoo, or anything that’d be used for contact information for their guardian or caretaker(s).

Sometimes people with autism will not respond to you. If I’m overwhelmed, then I might not even nod, or do anything. I’ll just stare or look around in a confused manner.

Talk to me calmly and softly, reassure me that things are going to be ok.

If you can’t find a ID bracelet or phone number on me, ask me for the name and number or my caretakers/parents. If I don’t respond, contact the proper authorities.

Please before contacting authorities, look around the store, outside, or around the area for my parents/caretakers. Authorities should be a LAST resort unless i am in immediate danger. Authorities are not properly trained to deal with higher support needs autistic people.

Stay with me until you know it’s safe not to.

Be patient!! I may not respond, I may cry, I may go catatonic or shut down from the stress and being overwhelmed. Be weary of that and act accordingly.

Understand that I need time to respond with my AAC. Be patient.

Overall, just do your best! These are just some pointers. Being patient and understanding is so important. Hope this helps! Have a lovely day.

[ksodirty]

[sturmsucht]

Wedding in the heath by Sturmsucht

Pixelfed | Instagram | Homepage

[beetnik-jay]

Let’s all collectively agree the inquisition wedding dress was not what it was

[xiaq]

Ok, I’m almost done. ♥️