Domsetic Luxiem Headcanons!! ahshuaduw
not proofread!!! mentions of spiders, squishing spider, ew spider
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vox
CANT DO SHIT TBH
like "oh he's a housewife" he's not.
Like sure, hell clean and cook BUT HE ONLY DOES IT WHEN YOU TELL HIM TO
he messes with u to Like
"oh can u clean the bedroom?"
"wdym.. my demonic aura cleansed everything already."
WE DIDNT MEAN SPIRITUALLY GO CLEAN IT
When you force him to, he actually does a good job!!
Like clothes are folded, floors are swept
and there's a huge ass pile of clothes in ur closet!!
MF
GTE UR ASS OVER HERE
HES HOT BUT HES NOT GETTING AWAY
he also likes to meditate
but like.. isolated. If you disturb him he's gonna make YOU sleep on the couch
half joke
he might tho
He takes pride into his meditation, you would want peace and quiet too yk?!
but if u guys have a pet, he'll let that mf disturb him any dayy
why does a dog get special privileges UR THE ONE WHO PAYS 50% OF RENT
he prob has those doobermans
he probably also bribed the apartment facility to let him in
I'm like 100% sure that dog is here illegally
but he loves the dog and you do too! partly.
he can't dance for the life of him however
it's
it's embarrassing
HE COULD DO TRADITIONAL DANCING !! but don't hit him up with some 21st century shit
he'll look like he's got it and then fall mid way.
gotta get his old as the the hospital HIS BONES CRACKED.
____________
shu
ehe
hes everything we wanted yall !!
I'm joking.
This mf DOESNT KNOW SLEEP
like you'll be going to get a drink at 3am and then straight up see some demonic looking figure in the hall
its just him trying to fix some shit
HE BREAKS THINGS JUST SO HE CAN FIX THEM
"how did the...light break?"
"ion know but what I do know is that I can fix it!"
CATCH HIM ON THE SERCUIRTY CAMERAS
hes useful tho in thay aspect!!
your landlord ain't getting any money from damages.
Dishwasher broke? Hes on it !! The TV isn't working as well? hes on it !!
this is an ad for shu yamino services go support him
He also does wack as shit at 3am
Yk how I said he was fixing something at night while u were getting a drink?
He was fixing A SPIDER.
SPIDER
he said "oh !!! I stepped on him so I wanted to help him!"
HOW U GON FIX THAT
HOW DID HE EVEN KNOW HE STEPPED ON IT
You also caught him fixing Christmas tree during December.
He laughed and said, "it wasn't bright enough!"
a police visited yall 2 hrs later
one of ur neighbors called the cops since it was way to bright.
He had to make it up with cuddles xoxo, and pay the fine xoxoxo
______
mysta
GET GIM AWAY
MANS TO FERAL
like literally can't do SHIT
maid mysta maid mysta!! YOUR MYSTAKEN (do u get the joke)
HE JUST RUINS EVERYTHING
you just cleaned the floors!! why is FUCKING MUD STAINS ALREADY?!?
Like he can't clean, CANTNFUCKING COOK (we all know this.)
I DONT even want to elaborate on how bad he cooks.
You Handel the cleaning, cooking, and what does he do?
he def ain't sitting there pretty (ugly/j)
instead, he opts to get the money and shit !!
But like
It's concerning
Like last time I checked he had money to pay rent and all that but....he had to much money left.
More than usual.
Your guys Financials were good dwdw!
BUT HOW HE GONNA HAVE THOUSANDS LEFT
HES SELLING DRUGS/
the obvious explanation and that his freinds make him do crazy ass stunts and give him money/j
"do a flip off that porch. 10$ mf."
LMFAOO
he's also just...insane.
You'll wake up at 3am again to see him on the phone
with elmo
LMFAOOO
THOSE APPS THAT SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF CHILDREN
IT SCARES HIM TO
you'll hear the most frightful voice just like
"when do you want the money?! PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE"
you have to hack in a delete that app for the mfer to sleep at night.
He'll boast like "I'm not afraid of that shit it's all fake!"
wait till u put a elmo plush on his bed
______
Luca
YAHH HES SO EUSHWUS
he's so cute omg
but so
messy.
LIKE HE CAN CLEAN AFTER HIMSELF BUT
HE HAS A HYPER MINDSET
so it's like one thing after another, he can't slow down to clean.
It's not that bad to clean after him, he doesn't make a bad bad mess.
BUT HE DEF NEEDS TO LEARN TO TAKE A BREAK
Nothing is shecduled either.
It's just like, do this, then that, then this, the profit all of our belongings to sushang(ehe love her)
But when he comes home from a long day..
omg
Let me elaborate
HE WAS CUDDLY ALWAYS BUT HES JUST
extra extra cuddly
he dosent want to do shit.
he'll drag you from whoever you are and force you on the couch/bed
and yall with just stay there
Maybe for ever
HE JUST FALLS ALSEEP SO EASILY
like it's kinda concerning
hyper energetic turing anemic at any possible moment he has
he'll drag you along all the time for those moments
He doesn't even speak he just mumbles and occasionally huffs out of relief
he so cute omg
but then
THEN
WHEN HES HYPER AGAIN HE WILL BODY SLAM YOU ONTO THE BED OR SOFA AGAIN
CHILL THIS AINT THE WWE
he doesn't know how strong he is omg.
______
Ike
FIANLLY
THE MOST LIKE
REASONABLE MAN
OUT OF EVERYONE
but he's like
a neat freak also,
Like....did u just leave a fucking go gurt on the table when you went to get ur phone?
DIRTY ASS MF !!!!
he just wants to make sure the house is clean
some people say, "your house reflects you"
And I think that's true but!!
he
we
we all know he gon snap
THE MFER HE NEEDS TO PUT UP WITH
his freinds trying be likebthe power rangers or some shit
I find it funny they are just all different colors palettes
BUT HES GREAT !!
HE COOKS, CLEANS, ACTUALLY HAS CALM HOBBIES
did I say calm
mbmb
let's not forget
his karaoke SKILLS
HELLO??? THE SCREAMING HE CAN DO
THE AMOUNT OF TIMES U GUYS GOT NOISE COMPLAINTS
nobody would've guess it was from him.
he just smiles, aplogizes and hands over the money
he handing over the money so willingly cause that mf KNOWS IT WAS HIS FAULT
but he don't give a shit LMFAOO
he'll shut the door, wait a little, then start cursing out the neighbors in Swedish
he's
he's scary.
he's literally like those innocent ass looking dogs names princesses that's a devil in secret
he's ur devil in secret tho <33
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To Build a Home
Chapter 7: The Emerald Dress
TW! No trigger warnings, just tooth-rotting fluff 🥰
Masterlist / Chapter 6
---
After failing to get ahold of her via phone call twice the evening prior, and again tonight, Raph decided to swing by Val's apartment, just to be safe.
"You guys go on ahead," he told his brothers. "I've gotta make another stop."
"To your girlfriend's?" Mikey teased.
The red-banded terrapin fixed him a warning look. "It ain't like that."
"Suuure-"
"What's it like, then?" Donnie challenged.
"We're friends, that's it."
"You still haven't told us how you two met," Mikey remarked suggestively.
"And I never will. Back off."
"Aw, c'mon-"
"Mikey!" Leo snapped. "You heard him - back off." He then turned to a mildly stupefied Raph. "Go do what you need to do. Let us know when you're on your way home."
"Fine. See you, then."
---
The room was dark. He checked the sofa bed expecting her to be in it, sound asleep. It was the middle of the night, after all. But she was not. She was nowhere to be found...
Nothing appeared out of place, though he couldn't be sure; she owned next to nothing.
A pair of headlights drew the terrapin's attention down to the street. He watched as the vehicle slowed to a stop in front of the apartment, and a well-dressed young woman stepped out onto the sidewalk. She looked to be of similar height and build as Val, but he couldn't see past the feathered headpiece to confirm it was in fact, her.
He decided to wait.
Not long after the woman disappeared through the front entrance did Val's apartment door open.
Raph blinked, taken aback.
There she was, dressed to the nines in an emerald flapper dress; complete with headpiece, pearl necklace, evening gloves, and blood-red lips. She carried her heels, having swapped them out for her boots.
He was so entranced by her appearance, he failed to realise he'd been spotted.
Shit, Raph cursed himself as Val strode toward the window, promptly lifting it open.
She said nothing; she just stared at him, brows raised questioningly.
"Sorry, I-" Raph stammered. "I was gonna knock..." If their skin could flush, his face would be red as a beet right now...
The brunette cracked a smile and giggled, shaking her head. "C'mon," she beckoned, stepping aside.
"Did'ya just get back from a fancy dress party, or somethin'?" He enquired as he climbed through. He couldn't tear his eyes away from her.
"Nope," Val answered, gesturing to her outfit. "This is my uniform."
"Your- what?? Your uniform?"
She nodded. "We get to dress up on Saturdays, at the club I work at."
"Oh. Well, you look... p-pretty."
Though Val fought it, Raph could tell he'd made her blush. "T-thanks," she replied bashfully. "Tell you what, though, I can't wait to get out of it... O-only cos it's uncomfortable-"
"-Oh! Yeah, for sure-"
"-Yep..."
For a few moments, neither dared to look at or utter a single word to one another.
"Sorry I haven't answered any of your calls," Val finally spoke, regaining eye contact. "I've been flat out working the last couple days..."
"All good," Raph smiled reassuringly. "I just thought I'd stop by to make sure you weren't dead."
She tittered softly at that. "Thank you... Um... i-is there any way I can contact you, so this isn't so one-sided? I can't call private numbers."
"Actually, there is. Thanks for remindin' me..." The terrapin produced a flip-phone from the pocket of his utility belt. "This is for you."
"Oh my God, is that..." Val gasped excitedly as she retrieved the phone. "I haven't seen one of these in ages! ... M-my first phone looked just like this, except it was hot pink. I remember having the 'Stoned Elmo' ringtone... It went off once during quiet reading; urgh, you shoulda seen the teacher's face... Sorry, don't mind me..."
"Don't worry about it," Raph chuckled. He didn't mind. In fact, he found it endearing. It was nice to see someone so giddy over something seemingly insignificant, like an old brick phone pulled from the dumpster.
"So, I can call you on this?"
"You can call everyone on that, yeah."
"Okay, awesome. Thank you."
"H-hey, I was wonderin'..." Raph felt since Val made the first move last time, it was only fair for him to take the lead this time. Besides, he already knew he wanted to see her again. He enjoyed her company. "I was wonderin' when you'd be free to hang out next?"
Val smiled warmly at that. "I'm usually free after three Monday through to Thursday and Sundays. I'm meeting up with a friend tomorrow... What about Monday? I can make dinner?"
"Sure. Alright," the terrapin nodded. "I can bring somethin'. Dessert? You like the healthy stuff, dontcha?"
Val chuckled. "I'm easy. Whatever you think's best... Surprise me."
Both their heads snapped down at Val's new phone; it'd started buzzing.
"New message - from Mikey?"
Fuck, here we go...
"He says, 'is loverboy still there?'..." The brunette looked over at him, amused.
Raph groaned. "He's bein' stupid; tryna get under my shell..."
"That's what siblings are for," Val replied gently. She held up the phone. "Thank you for this... I really should be getting to bed, now. It's been a long few days..."
"Oh, yeah, of course. Sorry."
"Make sure to let me know when you get home safe. I'll be up; I've still gotta get this face off."
"For the record, I think ya look better without make-up." Raph's eyes widened once he realised what came out of his mouth.
That sounded way smoother in my head...
"-Not that ya don't look good with... make-up. I-I'm just sayin'..."
Help!
"I get what you mean," Val reassured; she'd thankfully decided to grant him mercy. "Thanks, again. Goodnight."
"Night."
Finally outside, Raph mentally slapped himself.
The fuck was that?
---
Masterlist / Chapter 8
@android-cap-007 @miss-andromeda @happymoonangel
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The Static 3 - TubbyTronik (Apollyon)
In the static, acting Erratic
Error in the system, no display just static
Stuck in the Static, The Static 3
Gray, Black and White, (Oye, Eyo, transmission to me!)
I'm so rare, I get snatched up and I sound so good,
Elmo's gonna have to pack up outta Chavo's neighborhood
my sound's so rare you can barely feel it
styles so slick, you can't get a chance to smear it
PH80, and I ate the whole cow,
Pigged out like a piggy, still a Tubby not a sow
Got a sugar rush, and my dragon year is now
Upon the great wall of China i scraped your knee (How?)
3 Characters for you, P O 1, slick
nothing deep about me, except this crew that i run with
You're welcome to try us with those demonic powers
we're behind the static, so keep heckling like flowers
I remember being the White of the static Eons ago
I remember getting here, it was white as snow
In the static, I can still spit my lyrical smile style
and with the other static 2, I'll make it worthy while
In the static, acting Erratic
Error in the system, no display just static
Stuck the Static, The Static 3
Gray, Black and White, (Ok, luv, channel to me.)
I'm so applaudable, I get clapped up (Ayyo?)
Clap you in a strait tench jacket, straight strapped up (Oh)
I ought to gut punch you and invert your organs, but
you only pissed me off, so you get smacked up, twat
Out the static, first goal is to make your life tragic
Fuck up your duds, didn't need to use the TubbyMagic
I got the resolution, New Year's came really early
Yank your bitch ass back down 144p
Static bellied, pissed off and yellow headed
I'm a blockbuster, and you're just blockheaded
halfheartedly, I ask where the fuck you think you're headed
headbutt you, cause school always said I was fuckin hard headed
Lapses of memory with in the black of the static
I can hardly remember the isolation of the tragic
magic laid upon my new home with these other 2
pixels with me, this may be the best place to call tomb
In the static, acting Erratic
Error in the system, no display just static
Stuck the Static, The Static 3,
( And me. (And me. (And me.) ) )
I'm so matter of fact, I remain factual
Your blasphemous remains gasp in cathedral walls
Such slow breathing, Loud heart beating, pores bleeding
Can't hide from the hidden, suddenly no more breathing.
My liminal crimson art? [ C R I M I N A L ]
Putting [ R E D A C T E D ] in the static, straight Subliminal
I'm a wicked force of nature, unheard of before
The reckoning's before you and black blood's on the shore
Once apart of the static, always part of the static
You grow into the static, never away from the static
Nary a day passes without influence from my static realm
Nay, a whisper escaped, one day, and it was me, I tell em
Word of advice from your hueful god, dear
I'm going nowhere, and I'll always be near
Take my words with you, and listen, and hear
You just cannot stop what's already here
In the static, acting Erratic
Error in the system, no display just static
Stuck the Static, The Static 3
Gray, Black and White, (Hell yes! Transmit it to me!)
I'm so fly you can call me Sugar Ray
Call me late to dinner the way I ate sleep that day
My treasure's so green X'd up and mapped up
And the green so sticky, it might get slapped up
I pack up a bowl for the ones in rotation
no nightmare in it, no Freddy nor Jason
this shit be fictive, and that's what you sell em
I keep my scriptures zesty, bitch, I'm talkin lemon
I never fit in, because the waistline's busy
I wear a bucket hat, and it's full don't tip me
I'm green like a giant, not green with envy
And I doodle all day, that's why they call me Dipsy
One, two, three, the static's cozy like shag carpet
Uncomfy unconforming visions up and upon it
I ain't trippin on the gray, I keep my shoes tied
And here in the static? How could I lie?
In the static, acting Erratic
Error in the system, no display just static
Stuck the Static, The Static 3
Gray, Black and White, The Static 3
In the static, acting erratic, you better hop like a rabbit
Apollyon winks your essence damns it, and nabs it
trapped it in static, forever probably
Once they get you, you hang with the static 3
In the static, erratic, with the static 3
Trapped in the static, damns it, and nabs it
No matter once they get you, forever probably
Apollyon winks, you hop like a rabbit
Apollyon winks, you hop like a rabbit
Trapped in the static, trapped in the static
Apollyon winks, trapped forever probably
Now you forever hang with the Static 3
What are you lad's up to?
Flower's quiet.
FLOWERS QUIET?
Not even shit talking.
BUT THEY LOVE DOING THAT!
That's what I'm saying!
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