#Edward. twilight is a joke character what am I doing.

[lousylemonseminar]

Gawwshhhh darrnit I had this post about

IM NEVER GONNA COOK LIKE THAT AGAIN it like left my mind as soon as I had it written down And it’s not loading in But I had this post about how

Wild comparison but how suckenings Edward and Jimmy mouthwasher fuck are both these derrangged egoists

How they both thinnk theyre so untouchable And Individual in this. Corrupt mind boggling way

I NEED IT TO LOAD IN CAUSE I FONT THINK I CAN PHRASE IT AS GOOD AS I DID

Like how did you get that perception of yourself Do you care if that’s the reality? If anyone outside of your delusions think You’re A Hero or Your

I don’t even actually really know what Edward’s deal is Handsome???? (He’s kind of just a man baby but they both are I think it’d be easier to understand how Jimmy would inadvertently perceive himself Despite that being what he’s trying to prove throughout the entirety of mouthwashing)

And if so Then Why are you going so desperately to prove it by harming and violating literally everyone else?

It’s so

Fascinating to study villains I guess in these instances And to understand how they get to making irl fortnite like WHAT ARE YOU DOING (documenting its process)

They’re trying so hard to prove these grandiose versions of themselves, never realizing that they are The Only People they’ll ever prove that to

How both of them started at such a bottom feeder level Taking shortcuts to get someone anyone to think theyre more than they actually are But they’ll never be more Because theyre focusing on the wrong thing!!

They’re trying to get people to see them as this omnipotent god when all they’ll ever be is people!!!

The control they try fastening into anyone they have this Deluded sense of power over or “is the weakest” is like….. So abjectly incomprehensible and pathetically cruel

I NEED to understand how they get the notion they can do whatever they want and crash the space ship to avoid consequences…….

[pascaloverx]

Moonlight

Summary: You and Edward Cullen used to have a romantic relationship. But fate seemed not to believe in the possibility of a vampire and a potential she-wolf being together. Years after your separation, you return to Forks. Edward is committed to Bella Swan, and Jacob Black has his own pack. What happens when, upon your return, you begin to transform into a she-wolf and both Edward and Jacob seem eager to revisit the past with you?

Author's Note: The characters in this fanfic do not belong to me but to Stephenie Meyer and the Twilight universe. The story blends events that happened in the Twilight saga movies with invented ones. Enjoy reading. This story will contain inappropriate language, a possible love triangle, scenes of violence, and romance.

ONE THREE

TWO

You doze off during the rest of the car ride. When Jacob parks, you open your eyes and find yourself at the place where you spent the beginning of your life. Jacob has brought you near Sam's house, probably knowing that Uley would be upset if he wasn't one of the first to see you when you arrived in La Push.

"What the hell happened to you?" Sam Uley says in the most concerned big brother tone you've ever heard. As soon as you got out of the car with Jacob, you expected to hear comments about your current state.

"So good to see that you're still the same. I'm fine, even though I'm in this chaotic state, in case you wanted to know how I am." You say, walking up to him and hugging him. Jacob stands silently right behind you.

"You let her get hurt?" Sam asks as he steps back from you. He's questioning Jacob, who seems bothered by Uley's questioning.

"She got hurt before I was with her. Not that I'm not used to being the guy who takes the blame for any mistake you find. But it makes me curious that even when I'm no longer part of your pack, I'm still the first one you want to blame." Jacob says, not moving a muscle, looking both irritated by Sam's question and satisfied with his response. Sam, on the other hand, looks quite annoyed by Black's comment.

"Look, as much as I love watching a good fight, I'm not in the mood for it right now. Can you both pretend to tolerate each other while I'm here?" You say, stepping between the two and looking especially at Jacob. He sighs and takes a few steps back.

"Emily is inside making tea for everyone. I'd like you to meet her." Sam says, turning his attention back to you. Your gaze shifts to Jacob, who seems calmer now. You all then walk towards Sam's house to go inside.

"Y/N, did you have to pass through a pack of vampires or something to get here?" Embry almost shouts, rushing towards you as soon as you enter the house. He hugs you so tightly that you almost lose your breath.

"She just got here and you want to bring up those topics, you idiot. No wonder she ran away from us." Paul says, smacking Embry's arm and coming towards you for a hug. You missed all this chaos.

"You definitely haven't changed at all. You two seem like two fools fighting to see who's the biggest fool. But I loved the welcome. Tell me, how's dealing with Black and Uley without me?" You say as you walk towards Quil to greet him. Quil laughs when he sees Black and Uley's reactions to your joke.

"Believe me, without you, we're lost." Quil whispers as he hugs you. You look at him, expecting to see him smile as if he's making a joke, but as you look at him, you're not sure if he's joking.

"We can't complain. Jacob left the pack and took two with him, which made the pack less chaotic. Who knows, maybe you, Y/N, can convince those two that their split in terms of the pack doesn't mean they're enemies." Jared says as he helps a woman make tea. She must be Emily.

"That's literally what it means." Sam and Jacob say in unison, and everyone in the room laughs as if they were kids. Of course, everyone except the two boneheads.

"Poor girl. Just got involved in some accident, and you guys are expecting her to solve an ego battle that's been going on for years. No wonder she ran away from you all. No offense, dear." Emily says as she sets the cups on the table and kisses Sam's cheek.

"Sorry for the rudeness. I walked into your house without even introducing myself. My name is Y/N." You say, greeting Emily. She smiles sweetly and shakes your hand.

"I'm Emily, and don't even worry about apologizing. This pack drives anyone crazy. But I don't need to tell you that. I hope you're here to stay with us." Emily speaks kindly as she serves tea for everyone. You look at her and then glance at Jacob.

"She's staying with me." Jacob speaks quickly, surprising everyone. Sam looks at you and then at Black, as if trying to understand what's happening.

"And it's almost like nothing has changed…" Embry tries to whisper. However, everyone hears him, and Emily looks confused.

"Don't you think Y/F/N would be disappointed in you for dishonoring his daughter even though you're in love with Swan?" Sam says, holding his tea cup, looking at Jacob as if he wanted to provoke a big commotion.

"Unlike you, I'm pretty clear about what I want and who I want. I don't deceive anyone or take advantage of feelings. Y/N and I have been friends for years, there's room in my house, so obviously she's staying with me." Jacob responds to Sam with a certain sharpness. The two clearly aren't able to interact with each other peacefully. You set your tea cup down on the table and step in between Jacob and Sam.

"Sam, I find it disrespectful for you to bring up the memory of my late father in such a ridiculous situation as this little spat with Jacob. Jacob, I think you owe everyone an apology for your behavior. Now, I hope you understand, but I'm going to go clear my head. If anyone follows me, it will be the last thing they do on this earth. Consider yourselves warned." You say and leave, without seeing anyone's reaction or caring about being rude. The truth is, you were waiting for a good excuse to go see Carlisle. You know Edward well. If you don't go get examined by his doctor father, he'll surely bother you. And you need to forget about him. Walking, you arrive in a short time at the spot that used to be the meeting point you and Edward used for your romantic encounters. You remember how you used to spend the whole night together, talking about the future.

"Miss Y/N, it's been a while. Would it be very vampiric of me to say that you've aged?" Carlisle speaks, obviously trying to show his humorous side. You smile a little as you approach him, carrying a medical bag that looks just like any common human doctor's.

"Mr. Cullen, you have youth on your side in many aspects, but not in the humor department. Would it surprise you to say that even though I'm older, people still treat me as if I have no choice?" You say, sitting on a tree trunk nearby. Carlisle begins to examine you.

"Edward has the best intentions in his actions, I can assure you. He still cares a lot about you." Carlisle speaks compassionately, as if genuinely justifying Edward's actions. You smile, thinking it's nice that they care for each other in this way.

"So, how am I?" You ask, changing the subject. Carlisle smiles a little as he finishes examining you.

"With superficial wounds on your face and arms. No signs of concussion or anything like that. But going to the hospital for an X-ray would be most appropriate." Carlisle says as he packs up his medical items.

"Thank you for the consultation, Dr. Carlisle. I'll take your recommendation seriously. And do me a favor, ask Edward to stay away from me." You say to Carlisle, who seems to know that you've noticed Edward hiding behind a tree not far from you.

"In my opinion, you two should at least have one last conversation. To finalize the relationship. But know that my family and I will always have regard for you. If you need anything, don't hesitate to reach out." Carlisle says, looking kindly at you. Seconds later, he disappears. That must be one of the best parts of being a vampire.

"Do you think it's fair to come after me while you're committed to someone else?" You say loudly, making sure Edward hears and responds.

"I can't get you out of my mind. But I agree it's not fair. So far, my love for Bella has made me the kind of vampire I always wanted to be. And you know, it's an uncomplicated love. Sure, our situation is complicated because she's human, but the feeling has never been complicated. With you, it's like you're consuming me." Edward appears suddenly in front of you and declares this as if it were the best thing in the world.

"If I'm consuming you, why are you here? Go back to your beloved. Forget about me and do everyone a favor." You say, approaching Edward without realizing that you're almost face to face. You were immersed in old feelings when you let yourself get so close to him. His cold hands gently touch your face, pushing back the strands of hair that were in your face. He leans in, as if to kiss you. You feel that it's wrong, but you want it so much that it's like you're out of control. Before you realize it, your lips touch his. A gentle, slow kiss. As if you both wanted to savor every second of it. Or prolong the kiss because you know that this moment signifies many things. It signifies infidelity on Edward's part. Betrayal on yours. And it signifies that there are feelings between you.

[anexistingexistence]

Redacted Characters And Listeners As Things That I Or My Friends Have Said/Conversations We've Had:

Marcus: I wish I saw what people see in me fr

Asset: A bunch of organs?

Milo: But ok I wouldn't have high standards if I was Benedict Cumberbatch

Asher: Anyway, hope you're having fun with your book. Don't bite it in half or smth.

(Later)

Baabe: I surprisingly did not.

(Conversation about two different romance books)

Gavin: I was like, yes Rhys, get it-

Freelancer: I thought we were talking about Edward and Bella

Gavin: WHAT. GOODNIGHT. No.

Freelancer: I did not check the switch from Edward and Bella to Mister Fake-Latin-Name

Gavin: FAKE LATIN NAME💀

(Discussion of past relationships)

Darlin: I will show you convos of me and my ex-bf

Angel: Hold up when did you have a bf?

Darlin: Used to be my gf, turned out to be trans

Angel: Ohhh right right I remember

Darlin: The only time my friends believed I was gay

Lovely: Okay, Twilight shaped me into the deranged mess I am today, you should thank it.

Milo: Happy new year

Sweetheart: Make a wish

Milo: I want a big ass

Sweetheart: I want big tits

Milo: You can have mine

Sweetheart: Gladly

Milo: Only for you bbg

Vincent: Are you team Edward or team Jacob?

Sam: Neither- but if I had to pick I'm with the wolf all the way

Vincent: I FUCKING KNEW IT

Vincent: You werewolf-obsessed ass...

Sam: Though, Alice and Jasper were my pansexual awakening I'll be honest

Vincent: Alice 🧎‍♀️

Darlin: But still, call a therapist so you can get an appointment in a year. The longer you wait the longer... you'll have to wait- That sounded better in my head.

David: I have noticed just by talking to you.

Lasko: Can you promise me something real quick because otherwise I'll forget

Freelancer: Okok I mean tell me what to promise and maybe I'll do it.

Lasko: When I get my next paycheck you need to force me to buy the "Are You Lasky?" Shirt.

Lasko: I need to be the joke.

[mrszeoxin]

Cupid Parasite Sweet and Spicy Darling Review

This is the first time I’m playing a game as soon as it comes out! I’m super excited since I just finished the original game this week. I love fandiscs since I love fluff. This does have a new character though, so I’m curious to see what that’s like, but definitely more excited for the main guys.

Merenice

I decided to start with the new guy to get him out of the way. I typically don’t like new routes in these fandiscs, but I’m willing to give it a shot. From what I’ve read he can see people’s future, which is very cool. But kind of like Edward from Twilight, MC is the only person whose future he can’t see, which grabs his attention. I’m hoping this route will be fun.

Honestly I wanted to like this route, and I tried to have an open mind, but I couldn’t get into it. I just don’t like it when they introduce new characters you can romance that weren’t in the original game, and it just felt so rushed and out of place. HOWEVER, this gave us the closest we’ll ever get to an Owen route, and I’m through the roof with joy. The Owen Ending was so good, I love Owen 😭, it’s a crime they didn’t give him a full route in the original game or this one.

Gill

I decided to play the original guys in case order, so that means we start with Gill. Which works for me because I actually liked Gill in the original game (although I now know that not everyone shares my sentiment). Right away, I already noticed the music in this route is much better than the first one I did, which is kind of a relief. When I was playing Merenice’s route I thought the music was way worse than the first game, which made me depressed, but I’m starting to think maybe it was just a his route thing.

I love Gill. No surprise, I really enjoyed his route in this game too. I love how crazy he is, like the things he builds is so nerdy, and sweet, and insane, it’s just so great. I also got some good laughs from his route. Being in an Agape-Agape relationship irl, I really loved when they talked about how self-sacrificing love isn’t the same as straining/suffering for your love, rather it’s being willing to give up certain things mutually and it’s satisfying to love each other like that.

I did play all three endings since I wasn’t sure what to expect. But Sweet and Spicy = Best Ending, Sweet = Normal Ending, and Spicy = Bad Ending, based on what I saw. So I probably won’t do anymore Spicy Endings, as I tend to not like bad endings, but Gill’s Spicy End was very similar to the vibes from that popular Jumin Bad Ending and DLC.

I also really loved his short stories! I love getting to see the male lead’s perspective and thoughts in otome games and books. So it was super fun to get into Gill’s head again and see more of his past.

Shelby

Next up is Case 2, Mr. Shelby Snail himself. Unfortunately he was my least favorite in the original game, so I can’t say I’m super excited. But honestly, I still think his will be cute since at least they are already married. I just need him to not act like a wimp like last game lol.

Okay, this was actually surprisingly fun. As someone who Shelby is my least favorite love interest, I still had such a blast playing his route. It had so many funny scenes, and was just overall so fun to play. I love how real yet hilarious many of the situations in this route were. Like they had a fight, they had doubts, they had *cough* problems in the bedroom *cough*, and it was so funny and entertaining to play. I am a little bummed we didn’t get a SS Cupid joke, since new Cupid’s initials are also SS, but overall super fun to play. I’m pleasantly surprised!

Raul

Next up is Raul! I’m excited since I liked his original route a lot, and he’s about tied with Gill as far as me loving the character. I’m excited to see what we have in his route, I’m sure it’ll be extra fun since we have the whole him being a celebrity trope, plus he knows she’s Cupid. So I’m sure this will be super fun!

Oh my gosh I love Raul so much 😭💕. Raul and MC are just so cute together, and I love their dynamic so much. This route was just so fun. It had so many moments that had me laughing so hard, and others that had me tearing up because it was so sweet. Raul is so wholesome and sweet, which is so counter to the trope he plays. But I love him and his himbo golden retriever energy. I also think the plot for this one was so ridiculous and fun to play. Plus I love his reaction to meeting her dad. Everything was just so sweet.

Ryuki

Let’s go! It’s my favorite from the first game, I love Ryuki and his route so much 🥹💕. I’m so excited to get to play his route in the Fandisc! I hope we get to see him get all flustered again, but I also would love to see him be a little jealous again😅. He’s so cute, and I’m sure I’m going to love this route!

Ryuki is so cute, I can’t 😭💕. As I suspected I loved this route, Ryuki was just as cute as usual, and him and MC have such a cute and authentic “young love” vibe. It’s just so cute and sweet, it was so fun to play! Also when he dyed his hair back to its natural color, that really got to me, I can’t explain why but it got to me. He’s so amazing! Don’t even get me started on his bonus episodes 😭 ahhh I love him so much!!!

Allan

Unfortunately, I’m not super excited for this route. Given I didn’t like Allan that much in the original, I have a feeling I probably won’t love this route. However, I did enjoy Shelby’s in this game, so maybe if this route is funny I can at least enjoy that. I’d also enjoy if they gave MC a bigger change in appearance given she’s a demon now, because the original kinda felt like a cop-out, but I guess we’ll see.

So, I don’t like being a hater, especially since I know Allan is popular, so I’ll try to keep it short. I did not like this route at all. It was not enjoyable for me, I couldn’t get into it and it felt like it was dragging on forever. I just didn’t have any fun, the time skip makes it so we can’t see any of the characters we know in the game which is a bummer, and honestly them living forever just triggered my existential dread of dying. I’m glad she finally looked like a demon at some point, but honestly I just couldn’t get into it. If you like angsty stuff and love Allan you’d probably like it, but I just don’t. The Orpheus and Eurydice parallel also made me upset as someone who loves that myth, because Orpheus turns around BECAUSE his love is so strong, so I didn’t like the implication that somehow Allan’s love is so strong he wouldn’t turn around. Like that’s not the flex the writers think it is, I also didn’t like that Satan plot. They also did my boy Robin dirty in this route. I don’t know, maybe I’m alone here, but this just wasn’t it for me.

Peter

Last route! Let’s go! I’m excited for Peter’s route, he was my second favorite in the original game and so I think I’ll probably enjoy this route. I think it’ll be fun to get to see more of them being Jupiter and Juno, plus Peter is such a cutie I’m sure it’ll be good.

This was a good route! I didn’t love some of the later plot, but I love Peter and so it was enjoyable. He’s so sweet and I love his relationship with MC, it’s such a unique dynamic. I thought it was really enjoyable and fits well as a last route to play for the game.

Overall

I think I really enjoyed this fandisc for the most part. I liked pretty much all the routes, with two making me genuinely laugh a ton. A lot of the CGs were really good too, and it’s fun to see a more domestic life for the couples. However I didn’t like the music as much as the first game, it wasn’t bad, but the first game had such iconic songs that really captured each character and moment. I don’t feel like the music this game felt as special, and there was this sound and song that played that would get on my nerves so bad. But even with the music, I still think the game was super fun. I also loved Robin and his character a bunch. For some reason he reminded me of Yamato from My Forged Wedding, which is my first otome husband, so that made me like Robin even more. Honestly kind of wish we got a Robin or Owen route instead of Merenice. I think if you liked the first game and its humor you’ll probably love this game.

It was really fun getting to play a game when it released, and I’m glad I could post this but too long after. As of now I only played the Sweet and Spicy endings, if I go back and play the other endings later I’ll post an update! Next review will probably be a while until I post it since I’m going to be pretty busy soon.

But I’d love to hear your thoughts on this game if you’ve played it yet.

[cto10121]

Twilight Clown Takes—Part 10

Featuring “Twilight is badly written,” “Meyer did not intend to write X thing she definitely wrote,” “The series is über Mormon,” and other chestnuts. Fortunately, I do love nuts of all kinds, so om nom nom

The writing was so gibberish it was a bestselling phenomenon on par with Harry Potter.

The only thing bad about the writing in Twilight is that Meyer got a very bad editor. There are stray typos and errors in my original copies. Sadly, book editing has gotten worse since then, and I have found many modern books with similar errors.

Bella is not like other girls, all right. So much so that she constantly claims she is. Like here:

“Well, look at me,” I said, unnecessarily, because he was looking at me. “I’m completely ordinary.”

IF the dialogue in the books is like the movie dialogue…IF

“This main character is such a main character!!1!1” 😡 “Also big words make my wee lil brain hurt!!1!1”

Bella is literally so expressive around Edward and the Cullens, to the point where Alics mentions sourly she had “forgotten how exuberant” she was. Emmett and Jasper have a bet over how many people Bella could kill in her first year just on her temper alone. And re: Edward, Bella has no problem arguing and pleading and crying and ranting to him.

Also, Jacob is a different, much more immature character than Bella, so of course his POV would be different.

“Deeply desperate for sexuality” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣And these clowns claim Meyer is a bad writer. Don’t go throwing stones with your glass house, hon.

Anyhoo, Edward is the one who pushes for marriage, not Bella. Rosalie and Emmett get married every decade or so, but that’s only because Rosalie loves weddings—as in, being the center of attention. Do Alice and Jasper even have a wedding ceremony??? I don’t even think they got married in the traditional sense even once. No doubt they did, but they aren’t portrayed as a conventional married couple at all.

Other vampires that are not the Cullens do not marry at all—they are mated, which is an actually a greater and more permanent commitment than marriage in the Twilight world.

Also. The Twilight series, fearing sexuality? The Denali sisters literally went vegetarian because they loved fucking human men too much. And they are considered not only good vampires, but the Cullens’ extended family. And Renesmee nor Claire are child brides.

Twilight isn’t explicit about sex purely because Meyer realized her first book would be targeted to a YA crowd. But it is a romance through and through.

Ho boy, where to begin?

“Edward is supposed to be creepy, he is a vampire after all—” Would you like a cookie for this very obvious reading, Clown OP? That is some elementary school-level reading comprehension there.

“Failed to write an arc where the character recognize the problems, learn, and then overcome them—” Edward literally went from “She is my prey” to “I have her blood on my lips, and I am laughing at a joke she just made” in the first book alone. In New Moon, Edward made the disastrous decision to leave Bella, ramifications of which he was still dealing with in Eclipse (and he explicitly said it was the worst mistake he ever made). In Eclipse, Edward finally learns to trust Bella, fight for her love, and even decides to give her what she wants (i.e., sex) because he felt that he had been fucking it up the whole time. By Breaking Dawn, we have an Edward who finally accepts himself for who he is and learns to be happy in his vampire life.

As for Bella, she went from an introverted parentified teen so neglected she felt she had to cook and clean for her parents in order to feel less of a burden…to the powerful member of a coven who loves and supports her, saving the lives of said coven and mate from the Volturi. By the end Bella finally learns that what she wants is important and to fight for it. She learns to accept gifts and attention. She even finally describes herself as beautiful…as a human. That’s so big! That is an arc.

It is glaringly obvious, that I must question whether Clown OP has read the series or not. Most clowns do not, of course.

“The story never digs deep enough into him being a real danger to Bella—” Bitch, that’s all of the story. It’s literally 80% of Edward’s personality right there! He is too bad for Bella, it would be better if he weren’t in Bella’s life, it’s literally never-ending. A whole chunk of Bella’s motivation for becoming a vampire is because his world is too dangerous for her as a human. The whole plot of each book is Bella being hunted by a vampire, who are consistently the villains and described as monsters.

“Trying to turn Stephenie into the new J.K. Rowling—” When I picked up Twilight in ‘06 it was labeled as “Romantic Suspense.” The whole series was explicitly marketed as a paranormal teen romance, which was and is a subgenre of fantasy, with the whole Team Edward and Team Jacob thing riding strong. Twilight never tried to be something it wasn’t, and Meyer has never tried to make it out to seem like some epic fantasy. On the contrary, it was the anti fans that preferred the lore to the actual romance.

Nowadays the series is shelved under YA Fantasy, but that was after the series was completed. Breaking Dawn was perhaps the deciding factor.

Sure, Meyer was not aware of something she absolutely 100% wrote.

Bella’s parentification was canon before Midnight Sun was a twinkle in Meyer’s eye. And sure enough, when that landed, Bella’s neglect became downright glaring. But go on espousing sexist biases about female writers “not intending” certain things, Clown OP. It’s not like that isn’t a page taken from the Suppressing Women Writers handbook. When you know, you know.

Sigh. *schedules Movie Bella vs. Book Bella post*

[edwardssnail]

I don't think I've told you about my twilight phase but I'm always so tickled you're a twilight account. when I was like 12 or 13 I did have the phase. this was a time that was not good for me though my family was at a really shitty church sometimes I would unironically wear a khaki skirt and blue shirt and be like "omg just like Bella." I shudder to look back on it. and I remember that was when the midnight sun partial draft was floating around and on smeyers website And I read that, but I also read midnight sun fanfiction. And I'm not sure whether it was a fanfiction or my own demented imagination (probably the former) but I confused canon with that for the longest time I had a very clear memory of midnight sun's ending. Which yk didn't actually exist. I'm a little fuzzy on the details but now but I do remember it having different plot points than the actual ending and I was a little sad when I read midnight sun and that didn't happen. Do you think Smeyer could have written twilight if she wasn't Mormon and it just would've been different or do you think the Mormonism was a vital component in creating the disasterpiece that it is.

Haha I'm glad you appreciate it because sometimes it's SO cringy having to respond to things on my fuckvictorvale account from my twilight blog. So it makes me feel better that someone has seen my main and related

The khaki skirt outfit is so iconic, I wish it was in the movies. AND EDWARD'S SLEEVELESS BUTTON UP because wtf is that. I definitely remember when twilight and new moon came out and wanting to wear all of her layered hollister tank tops and long sleeves. Even now, I love looking at all of Bella's outfits. Some of them are really cute

I didn't find out about the midnight sun draft until I was like 21, hadn't thought about twilight in years, but I so vividly remember being in my college apartment, staying up until like 3 am reading it on my phone lmao. Honestly I liked the draft better than the book. Maybe just because it was shorter. Once the book came out, I read about half and gave up because it was just TOO MUCH. Way too much Edward. I'm not an Eddie hater but good god, nobody needs to hear from him that much

Midnight Sun is actually the main reason I made this blog. I had recently read the draft, COVID quarantine had just started and I was in my last semester of undergrad and not doing well lol. I ended up watching Twilight with my roommates and latched onto it again because of nostalgia and then stuck around for the Midnight Sun craziness

At this point, I confuse canon with fan theories and the spin off books/movies all the time. The last time I read Eclipse and Breaking Dawn was the first time I read them... IN 2008. I really don't have a good grasp on what's canon from the books but I'm just here to fuck around

I think the Mormanism is vital but in the worst way. Like it did not benefit the series at all but without it, it would be unrecognizable. And part of the charm of liking Twilight is how cringy some of it is. Half of it doesn't make sense, half of it is extremely questionable , the characters often aren't developed that well. All of Breaking Dawn is just bad. But it's fun! Idk, the weirdness gives it charm. As much as I joke about how bad it is, I do genuinely enjoy it

[imaginationisveryrapid]

Tag people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @tm-trx - Thank you! ☺️

Three Ships

Buck x Eddie (9-1-1) - They’ve had a grip on me since early 2020 when they showed up on my dash and have never let go since. I have no clue if they’ll ever go canon, but I’m going to root for them always.

Pacey x Joey (Dawson’s Creek) - I can’t call them my first ship, but it’s a close damn thing. I remember watching DC every week and just despising Dawson. I know it was technically his creek, but damn was he annoying, especially when he was with Joey. And then there was Pacey. Still one of my favorite television characters ever. They were so cute together and seasons 3 & 4 of the show were just excellent, mostly because of their chemistry and how many scenes they shared.

Bella x Jasper (Twilight) - Team Edward/Team Jacob, who? To be honest, I don’t really know where this one came from. I have just been in the mood recently to read some Bella x Jasper fic, and luckily there are some excellent ones out there. These moods have always ebbed and flowed, but this pairing always seems to come back every so often and they’ve got a grip on me right now. I’ve even started rewatching clips from the movies (??? what am I doing with my life???) and looking for fanvids on YouTube. I’ve always gone for the unexpected/rare pairings, I guess. Thank fuck for fanfic and fan created works.

First Ship

Kimberly x Jason (Mighty Morphin Power Rangers) - Does it make sense? Not so much. But I haven’t ever made sense, even as a child. I always remember being mad that Kimberly got with Tommy and would think up scenarios that could change canon even way back then. I was writing fanfic in my head before I even knew what it was. I wasn’t joking about those unexpected/rare pairings.

Last Song

Volcano Girls by Veruca Salt - Alternative rock has always been my number one genre, particularly 90s alt rock and female-led bands are badass. This song is so kickass.

Last Movie

The Proposal - Needed a mindless rewatch of something cute, that I’d seen before.

Currently Reading

Fight Like Hell: The Untold History of American Labor by Kim Kelly - Just got this one from the library and haven’t read too many chapters yet, but it’s great so far!

Currently Watching

9-1-1 - Finally getting around to finishing my rewatch of the series with my mom that we started last year. Just made it to the halfway point of season 4. I am in no way prepared for 4x13 and 4x14. 😬

Puppet History - Doing a complete rewatch of the series, now that the latest season is finished. I do a lot of rewatches, I’ve noticed, lol.

Good Omens - I saw stuff on Tumblr when the first season came out, but I was able to get the DVD set from the library and I’m finally watching it the whole way through.

Ghosts (CBS) - I watch this one every week with my mom and my aunt.

Currently Consuming

Water - it’s almost 1am here. If I tried to eat or drink something else now, I’ll be up even later.

Currently Craving

Fries. Always fries.

Tagging some folks from my notes (but no pressure of course): @sarcasticfina @holypiercednipplesbatman @molly2009 @organizedstardust @periru3 @calculated2stagger @bleakmonday

[fizzingwizard]

So he's a fan fiction writer, but he published the book as an original work? Am I missing something here? It sounds like he tried to force Simon Tolkien to read his Lord of the Rings fanfiction, turned it into "original" fiction when he refused, published it, and then accused Rings of Power of plagiarizing... him?? It was LotR to begin with, then made into original work, but still recognizable enough as LotR for RoP to be able to dip into it... huh??

With EL James, anyone who knows Twilight fanfiction can easily believe 50 Shades began as one. But anyone who only knows Twilight and has never read fanfiction I doubt would ever notice. Because, like with a lot of fanfiction, accurately portraying the characters is sacrificed in the name of "what I find cool and sexy" - which is particularly common in AUs where fanfiction writers don't have the benefit of setting and canonical history to buoy their shallow characterization. I'm sure Edward and Bella were easy to work into Christian and Anastasia because they were hardly Edward and Bella to begin with.

What I mean is, it's much easier for me to believe EL James with her creepy bdsm Twilight AU could get away with repurposing it as original fiction, than this guy who seems to have just written Lord of the Rings lore. Obviously I haven't read it. Maybe the specific things he thinks Amazon copied from him are unique and original enough to raise suspicion. And I know that a lot of fantasy elements in LotR are just genre tropes these days that everyone uses. I just find it doubtful, given that he copyrighted it preemptively, and then went to lengths, through attorneys and by going to see Simon Tolkien himself, to force his manuscript on them. It's weird. The article says he wanted a "collaboration" with the Tolkien estate, so isn't that as good as admitting what he'd written was Lord of the Rings?? Very difficult figuring out what his basis for his argument is...

I'm super pro fan creation. The fact of the matter is art and toy making companies only ever come out with generic products they think has mass appeal, but fan created products immortalize your favorite scenes, your favorite jokes and memes. They're personal and they're fun. And I'd rather read free fanfiction written by a 15-year-old than those ghost written novelizations that plague every popular series. Most of those are, again, generic as hell, but that 15-year-old doesn't give a shit about convention. Their writing might be not great but at least it won't be boring!

But when people go out and complicate things this way it makes us all look bad. Like we're money-grubbers seeking to piggyback off the success of someone else. The article is somewhat compassionate towards this guy, but I'm finding that difficult. Defending Amazon is dead last on my to-do list, but... no one asked him for a collab and he tried to force it anyway. I'm having difficulty seeing him as anything but an opportunist. He probably truly loves Lord of the Rings and maybe got lost in a daze, mistaking his love as some kind of claim on it. Once you involve money, though, it's hard to feel the love anymore.

Althouh it will be really, really funny if it turns out that Amazon did plagiarize his book. Because Lord of the Rings does not lack lore. The whole canon is an endless treasure trove. Imagine ignoring all that "extra" stuff Tolkien himself wrote in favor of some dude's fanfiction.

Hello Mr Gaiman, I just read a reblog you put regarding sending fanfiction/ideas to the universe's authors (like sending you Good Omens fanfiction for example) and I have a question, it's probably a dumb question with an obvious answer but if I don't ask it won't go away.

So if you ever read the good omens fanfiction I'm writing you wouldn't be able to put whatever I put there but what if I explicitly stated (like in the summary) that it could be used? Would it still create legal problems? Like with payment and stuff?

I'm not going to read your fan fiction so I will never know if you gave me permission.

And if you're wondering why I have a blanket rule not to, I'd point you to this article. On something that's happening right now.

[aspoonofsugar]

Why don't you like how Sun and Blake's relationship has been handled?

Hello!

Well, simply because it has not really been handled (at least imo) and that is the problem :’’’)

I think Sun as a character suffers from the same problem Adam has... aka they could not decide what role they wanted him to have in the story and so it ends up damaging the character.

Or to better say, they probably knew what kind of role Sun (and Adam) had to have, but they tried to convey/realize too many things with him and the end result is not the best.

First of all, I think Bumbleby was supposed to be the end result since the beginning:

Black the beast descends from shadows. Yellow beauty burns gold.

The Beauty and the Beast motif is linked to Blake and Yang since the red trailer. Moreover, Yang losing her arm because of Adam is something foreshadowed in the Yellow Trailer:

Scathing eyes ask that we be symmetrical, one sided and easily processed. Yet every misshapen spark's unseen beauty is greater than its would be judgement.

And in general, the Black and Yellow Trailers set up Blake and Yang’s foiling. Blake runs away from a conflict and disappears as a shadow, while Yang runs into a conflict and rises as the sun:

To top it off they are also each other’s partners, so there is no reason to think their fight with Adam in Mistral and its implications were not planned since the beginning.

And I am not even mentioning all the songs like BMBLB (vol 4 I think) and All That Matters (volume 5).

That said, Blake and Sun do receive a lot of romantic teasing, which is never really solved, was unnecessary and imo blurried both the set-up of Bumbleby and Sun’s character arc.

BLACK SUN - ROMANTIC TEASING

A quick recap of the romantic teasing between Blake and Sun, just in case.

Sun starts flirting with Blake the moment he sees her, Blake goes to the dance with him and blushes at him during the Vytal Festival (while a love song is playing, but we’ll get back to this song later):

After this, we have Blake and Sun’s interactions in volume 4 and 5. In these volumes, Blake stops showing any form of romantic interest in Sun (I think, it has been a while though), but it is implied Sun still has feelings for Blake:

Every smile, every glance Could be another chance That you'll finally see The love that is me So until that time I'll follow every day Every step of the way And continue to say Go where you need to Know I won't leave you I'll follow you like morning follows night

At the same time, though, their interactions are full of jokes/tropes usually found in slap-stick comedies...(btw this is also why the discourse about Blake “being abusive” for slapping Sun or Sun “being creepy” for stalking Blake is missing the context imo). Like, meeting the parents with the mother teasing the relationship and the father disliking the partner is a romantic trope.

LOVE TRIANGLE OR UNREQUIRED LOVE?

I don’t think the problem is that there is romantic teasig between Sun and Blake, but that nothing is really done with it.

The way I see it, there could have been two ways to solve this.

1) The classic love triangle.

You have two characters fall for the same person and in the end the person chooses one.

This trope is often considered cheap, but it really does not have to be. The way to have it work is to actually give the choice of the partner a thematic meaning... basically the protagonist of the triangle is not just choosing a partner, but a specific ideal or way of living.

For example, in the Twilight Saga (yep, we are using Twilight examples) Bella choosing Edward over Jacob is not just about choosing a boyfriend. It is about choosing the life of a vampire over that of a human.

Similarly, Katniss choosing Peeta over Gale in the Hunger Game is her choosing a specific ideology over another.

Like, triangles are actually pretty common in narratives, even when they are not romantic. In Arcane, we have Jinx having to choose between Vi and Silco and Vi will probably have to choose between Jinx and Cait. Similarly, in the X-Men- Days of a Future Past, there is Raven that must choose between Doctor Xavier’s way of life or Eric’s.

Now, the problem with the Blake-Yang-Sun situation... is that Sun does not really represent an alternative way of life compared to Yang. If anything, Adam does and Blake chooses Yang as a sign of her growth.

So, I think the point of Sun and Blake is actually the trope of unrequired loved.

It is actually pretty much stated in the two Black Sun’s songs mentioned above.

In Like Morning Follows Night, there is this:

See, you'll never understand What I feel, what I see (...) Trying to search for this happiness Lost in the lights But it seems that it's all Just out of my sight Just out of my reach, Can't seem to get it right Like I'm cursed with this turbulence (...) Yet I still believe in you Every breath, every word Every smile, every glance Could be another chance That you'll finally see The love that is me

While Not Fall in Love with You is basically an unrequired love song:

Girl of my dreams you would make my life complete But you're a distant dream to me Then I know and I know that you're-- Out of my league How could it ever be? What am I supposed to do- Just sit here and not fall in love with you?

The theme of unrequired love is also the one that fits Blake’s story the best. She is recovering from an abusive relationship with a possessive boyfriend, who is ready to kill her and her loved ones. Because of this, someone like Sun that openly flirts with Blake, but who is ready to help her selflessly and lets her go once he realizes Blake has feelings for another person... could be a great part of Blake’s healing plot-line (and he still is).

However, even if this is clearly what the authors were aiming for, it still does not come across as strongly for two reasons.

a) At Beacon Blake shows some kind of interest in Sun.

b) Sun’s unrequired feelings and him giving up on Blake are never fully addressed.

a)

Ok, here we arrive at what I mentioned at the beginning aka how I think that the writers tried to do too many things with Blake and Sun’s relationship. They should have probably only focused on the unrequired love trope. However, they chose to do two additional things with Black Sun (imo).

TEEN IMMATURE LOVE

I think the writers have decided to use the Vale arc as some kind of happy childhood/adolescent phase arc:

Ren: It's been a long time. We've all grown in our own ways.

Ruby: You really think so?

Ren: Well, think back to when we were all at Beacon, would you say you ever did anything foolish or embarrassing? Or do you think you were perfect?

When it comes to love, they probably wanted to explore the idea of teen love and crushes, both very common in adolscence.

Have you noticed that (with the exception of Renora and maybe Emercury) none of the characters actually go to the dance with their true partner/love interest?

Jaune tries to go with Weiss and finally asks Pyrrha out. However, despite their relationship being deep, Pyrrha dies in volume 3 hence if Jaune has a final love interest, it won’t be her.

Ruby goes alone and states she dislikes dances.

Weiss shows interest in Neptune, but their relationship has not been mentioned since then and I am fairly sure Weiss is not ending up with Neptune.

Finally, Blake goes with Sun even if Yang is clearly the reason she goes in the first place. Moreover, she and Yang still dance together.

So, it is as if Beacon is a time to explore different partners and love stories, while they are still all growing. Honestly, it is the same idea behind how love stories are handled in the sit-com Alexa and Katie :P. Both girls there have two different boyfriends. The first one is puppy love, while the second one is linked to more serious issues the two characters have.

Here, it is the same, but while it works well for Jaune and Weiss, I am not sure it works as well for Blake.

I mean, Pyrrha is a central character in Jaune’s arc, but her premature death makes so that if Jaune were to finally find a new love interest... it would not feel forced or cheap. Especially because narratively a lot of focus has been given to him grieving Pyrrha and his arc keeps echoing Pyrrha’s throughout the narrative. Even if Jaune were to find a new love, his love for Pyrrha would not become meaningless.

When it comes to Weiss instead, Neptune is so not important to her arc and they have basically zero meaningful interactions (the only important one is actually about Jaune actually), that it is easy to read their relationship in volume 2 and 3 as a superficial crush.

However, Sun is an important character in Blake’s storyline and his feelings for her are not really solved in a meaningful way.

Moreover, we do not even see Blake’s relationship with him change. It is not that it is given space for the audience to see Blake develop a crush for him, get over it and truly fall in love with Yang. Everything happens all together and it is not elaborated on. So, we see Blake going to the dance with Sun, but also dancing with Yang and being desperate when Adam hurts Yang, etc.

This happens because of my next point.

PLAYING WITH BIAS

As many people have noticed, Blake’s story is basically a deconstruction of the cute kitty girl stereotype (and this is awesome).

She is a cat faunus and her story is full of romantic tropes...

She has an ex and mysterious boyfriend who is initially presented as a an anti-hero.

She also meets an energetic selfless guy who falls for her on sight and follows her around to help her.

These are two very common romantic storylines set-up, but they are both subverted. On one hand Adam is not a broding anti-hero Blake has to heal, but an abusive and manipulative stalker. On the other hand Blake does not have to fall for Sun as a reward for him helping her.

Blake instead falls in love with Yang and both characters grow on their own as people, so that then they can be together despite their past traumas.

The idea is great really, 10/10. However, the execution is not flawless. Like, subversion is actually hard to make. You have to build things up and to play with people’s expectations.

Blake’s arc has a lot of romantic subversions and they were supposed to be all strongly set-up in volume 1 and 2. We are talking of the narrative setting up 3 (Adam, Sun and Yang) and I say 3 romantic relationships at once. In the two shortest volumes. With eps that are 5 minutes long. In an ensembled cast show.

A really ambitious project :’’’)

I would not say the end result is terrible (a 6-7/10), but it is not even as strong as say... She-ra’s handling of hetero-ships... that is an example of a successful play with people’s bias and expectations. It is smart, tongue-in-cheeck and meaningful. The hetero relationship as treated with the same care of the queer ones in the series. They even foil the queer ones. But in the end the same sex coupld all kiss, while none of the hetero ones do. It is a way to convey how it usually is for LGBTQ people to see their ships built up, but without a final cathartic kiss XD.

Anyway, I think Black Sun as a relationship wanted to do something similar, but I think it is not so neat.

b)

SUN’S ARC

The problem with filling Blake and Sun’s interactions with romantic tropes is that they take away screentime that could be used to actually give proper development to Sun.

Like, I think Sun and Blake’s time in Menagerie is not really used effectively when it comes to Sun’s character. This is probably partly because volume 4 as a whole is the weakest one and has some structural problems (basically I think they tried to adapt the same structure of their shortest eps to longer ones and it failed).

Anyway, the point is that in volume 4 we could have had Sun’s arc set up in a much stronger way than it is in the series.

We could have had a moment where Sun is openly turned down by Blake. Or a moment where Sun realizes because of something Blake does or says that she is in love with Yang. Both situations would have >>>

1) Cleared the Black Sun confusion and changed people’s expectations

2) Driven home the point of Sun’s character in Blake’s story more clearly - he is not the brave love interest that wins his lady’s love, but a turned down boy who is still a good person and a loyal friend

At the same time, we could have had Sun’s flaw which is hinted at in volume 6 and explored in Before the Dawn explored more.

In BTD we are said this:

Sun didn’t rise to Scarlet’s bait, which was pretty strange. But it also wasn’t his style to devote himself to a cause like this. He usually went wherever his whims took him, whether that was across the sea to help a friend or to get noodles at three in the morning. To pledge to fight a big cause with no clear solution or end in sight? That really didn’t sound like Sun. Maybe his time with Blake in Menagerie had changed him.

This is an example of telling and not showing... really in the series this never comes up nor it is ever explored. It does not contradict the story. It actually makes sense when considering what little we know of Sun and if we reread some interactions with Blake using this interpretative key. However, it is surely not one of the main topic explored in Blake and Sun’s relationship, while I think it could have been great if it were.

And these are my main thoughts on the whole Black Sun/Sun Wukong topic. Like with Adam, I don’t think the end result is terrible or the basic idea is not good. But I also think this is not where the series writing shines and I am not surprised people invested in a ship that was teased and never properly addressed are angry for how things turned out. You should not give people a reason to care if you are not going to pay off the build up. In this case paying off did not have to be a SunXBlake is canon, but a way to solve their bond similarly to how Jaune’s crush for Weiss is solved in volume? Yep, I think that was due and would have made things less blurried. People would still be disappointed probably, but at least they might have felt less cheated.

Of course, since Sun’s story is not over we might discover some other reason behind the choices made. Still, in an ongoing series pacing is still a thing, so...

Thank you for the ask! Analyzing Black Sun has actually been rather fun and it made me appreciate it, Bumbleby and Blake’s arc more tbh :’’’) 

[therealvinelle]

what backstories do you wish the characters had? i wish she’d given emmett something more interesting than just bear dude so rosalie could have a mate and made jasper Not a Confederate.

Hmm.

For the most part I'm happy with the characters' backstories, in large part because their backstories are what they are and if I wanted to change them it would have to be because I wanted to make them different people. It's on par for me with saying "what personality traits do I wish the characters had", my brain just puts out the roadblocks and I can't even do the thought exercise because the "then we'd be dealing with a different person, that's what would happen" pops up immediately.

Say for instance that I think Edward's backstory should have been that he was a piano prodigy, and that he caught the flu because he snuck out to play at a competition, inadvertedly infecting and killing his parents and getting himself turned into a vampire. That would be a tragic backstory, and it could be slotted in with canon since we don't know how the Masens caught the flu nor that Edward wasn't a piano prodigy, but it would ask the question - how does this affect Edward as a person? Because the answer can't be "It doesn't, this is still canon Edward. Just canon Edward with a completely different background" then.. why am I changing the backstory?

I'm not criticizing your question, just trying to explain why I struggle to answer it.

This all being said, there are two major things I would change.

One, like you I would not have Jasper be a Confederate. I see that Meyer wanted him to be a military guy even in life, she wanted him to be old enough to be a seasoned veteran, and that she wanted the newborn wars to take place in the South, but my god there have been other wars than the American Civil War. Since being a Confederate never informs his character in canon in any way, it's never even brought up, there is no reason why the specific war (or side - he couldn't have been Union?!) can't be switched out.

He could have fought in the Mexican-American war. He could have fought in the War of 1812. He could have fought in one of the South American Wars of Independence, make Twilight a bit less US-centric. Or don't switch out the war, he could have been Union.

Confederate wasn't our only option here.

Two, Meyer suffers from JKR-syndrome because her timeline is weird at several points. She also suffers from Murrrrican syndrome because my god Twilight is painfully US-centric.

In no particular order...

Carlisle appears to have spent forty years being a hermit in the English woods. I wish I was joking, but the Guide says that. I... think I'm morally obligated by the law of common sense to move that timeline.

Carlisle leaves Volterra in the 1720's and heads to America. Meyer appears to intend for him to have stayed there ever since, which is problematic because I don't like it, that's so boring. And it doesn't make sense, why would he? The American Dream wouldn't be a thing for another century (and wouldn't be relevant for a vampire even if it was), America at the time was a British colony. Not much happening there. Carlisle hoped he'd find animal-eating vampires in this unexplored place, to be sure, but spending 200 years in America..? It'd be one thing if Carlisle became a doctor right away, but when Edward gives us his backstory it sounds like Carlisle only became a doctor much later. So, when the timeline says that Carlisle went to America but doesn't say he stayed there, I take it to mean our man was a world citizen.

There's a five-year-gap after he left Columbus in 1912 and before he started working in Chicago in 1917, which to me is just long enough that our favorite workaholic vampire was likely doctorin' someplace else in the meantime. Where? It doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, though I like to think he went back to Europe. Lots of things happening in Europe at the time.

The timeline for the formation of the Volturi is weird, filled with little things that don't quite make sense, or would be very contrived if they did. I'm guilty of disregarding it entirely. Canon may be God to me, but God must be worthy of worship(and no, I couldn't think of a less weird way to phrase that). In this case, I'm gonna go with the more fan-typical attitude of "fuck that".

[sugaroto]

@theallstore You are completely right, this is greek mythology

And @asinine36 if you're still interested

Allow me to introduce you to Menippos, Hermes and Charon

Well, not these ones

These ones

Ουκ αν λαβοις πάρα του μη έχοντος (ancient greek for= You cannot take from the one who doesn't have) is a greek animated satire tv series that came out back in 2010-2011

And then got canceled cause it was mocking politicians

It's based on the myth that Menippos, a cynic philosopher, who was really poor and died without an obol (coin) couldn't go to the underworld

So they made a show of it

Charon and Hermes try to get him to work but he always messes it up

Some of the jobs he did was: fast food employee, vampire hunter (specifically sent to kill Edward Cullen), taxi driver, politician, football player, fake Santa Claus, detective who finds lost dogs etc

Hermes keeps killing him any time Menippos is annoying him and archangel Gabriel sends him back down (the man doesn't know sleep)

Funny thing is. Menippos is an ASSHOLE. ΜΑΛΑΚΑΣ he is the epitome of MALAKAS

I think it's hilarious that people said he's NTA

Maybe in the specific case he seems like a victim ok, but his whole personality in the show is being an asshole and he knows it

In this clip, he made a political party called A.S.S.H.O.L.E

Let me translate the conversation:

Add: "are you a right-wing?

No?

Are you a left-wing?

Neither?

On the center? You laugh?

Maybe you're just an "ASSHOLE"?

"Big indecisive folksy independent and unincorporated coalition"

We dont discriminate except pedophiles ex and current dictators and family members of Bush"

Menippos: *laughs*

Hermes: no tell me I didn't tell you so

Charon: you told me so

H: no no tell me I didn't tell you so

C: you- you told me so

H: and what do you have to say now?

C: You're right

H: I know I'm right, but what do you have to say?

C: he's an asshole. The lad is an asshole

M: not only I am. But I am also their political leader. Certified, first instance and advertised on television *continues laughing*"

Ps: in greek malakas, means someone who jerks off/ masturbates and the dick is also called "bird" so. The icon of the political party MALAKAS was 100% on purpose (also yeah malakas can't really be translated I think but we use it similar to the way English people use asshole so we've agreed that's the translation even though asshole means κωλοτριπιδα)

So yeah, the show is about an Asshole trying to find 1€ in the bad economy of Greece 2011 in order to pay mister Anger Issues and Crybaby so they can retire and go on vacation

Also, greeks today are in fact Orthodox Christians (the majority at least, I mean look at the flag) and that's where the joke of "changing religions" comes from

There's also a bunch of random stuff that I love about the show, like Charon being in love with Cinderella but she keeps rejecting him

And a lot of reoccurring characters, whether fictional (like Lassie, ET, Cinderella, Avatar(blue) Snow white, Pluto, the twilight cast) or real (Madonna, Obama +lots of politicians, The Pope, Queen Elizabeth) etc

Also, I almost forgot, some people in the tags said Hermes (or someone else) should have paid for him, that's not how it works. Hermes' job was to bring the souls to the underworld and Charon's to take them across the river, Hermes couldn't be paying Charon for every dead soul he brought

Am I the asshole for not paying and dying?

So, I (M???) Technically died thousands of years ago. The thing is at that time my country and religion had the rule that the dead were buried with a coin to pay the dude that was taking them to the underworld.

But I was (and still am) really poor. So the God (M???) who collected the souls (We're gonna call him H) and guides them to the underworld left me at the side of the river where I had to take a boat

Then a boatman, let's call him C took me to the other side, when he asked me to pay I didn't have any money to pay him and actually enter the underworld

I suggested that H should pay for me since he was the one that brought me there but he said something like "As if I'll make any money from this business if I start paying for the dead too"

Well since I couldn't pay, I never really died and have been wondering around earth for a while now.

But recently my country officially changed religions and since the old gods gave everything to the new ones H and C had to do some paperwork in order to actually get retired

But they can't get retired since I am an unfinished business from the ex administration. Any time H tries to kill me (that guy has a lot of anger issues and hates my guts so it happens a lot) I'm sent up to heaven and an angel G(M?) has to bring me back down since I "am not a Christian and unfinished business" etc etc

H and C have been trying to find me a job so that I'll get paid, pay them and die so they can retire

So far I haven't been able to get paid, I guess I'm kind of sabotaging the whole thing since I don't want to die but also the country and the economy is shit, where would I find 1€ in this time and age?

So am I the asshole for not helping them retire by paying them and dying?

[headinthestaticsky]

The Dusk Calls for me, Jasper Hale x Fleur Swan: Chapter 8

AUTHORS NOTES: None of the characters in Twilight belong to me. All rights go to Stephenie Meyer.

“It's started taking its toll on me now 

It comes back to you 

The lights are on but the bulbs have blown out

It comes back for you.”

Test and Recognize by Seekae

Driving down to La Push brought back fond memories. I remember always hanging around Sam and Leah when I was younger. The walks around the beach were my favorite, even if I did get pushed into the water. I was the youngest after all even if it was only a year... it was a big difference to them. I haven’t seen them in years, I hope they’re both doing well. I parked next to Tyler and got out, immediately shivering at the cold wind.

“You guys are really gonna surf out here? It’s freezing.” I said. Angela grabbed a blanket from Tyler's van and handed it me. I took a seat next to Bella and stole a Twizzler.

“I mean we drove all the out here, we gotta do something.” Jessica replied.

“I don’t think I should go out there.” Eric said.

“You know, I keep thinking Eric’s going to ask me out to the prom but, he just doesn’t.”

“You should ask him.” I suggested. Bella nodded in agreement with me.

“Really?”

“Yeah.” I said.

“Yes you should, you’re a strong, independent woman.” Bella said.

“Thanks you two.”

“Bella.” I heard a familiar voice say.

“Hey Jacob.”

I looked up seeing Jacob and Sam, a smile made it’s way onto my face. Sam’s hair only got longer.

“Hey Sammy, been a while hasn’t it?”

He smiled at me before speaking.

“Yeah it has, you still haven’t gotten rid of that god awful nickname.”

“I never will.” I said in defiance.

“So, you guys surfing?” Jacob inquired.

“No.”

“No, absolutely not.” Bella said.

“Bella would drown the second she got on a board.” I joked. Bella nudged me in the ribs and laughed.

“She’s not wrong.” Bella said.

“You guys should keep her company, her date ditched her.” Jessica said.

“Note to self, never tell Jessica anything. She has a big mouth.” I thought to myself.

“What?”

“What date?” Eric asked.

Jessica giggled before continuing. 

“She invited Edward.”

“She was just being nice Jess.” I said.

“I think it’s nice she invited him, no one ever does.” Angela defended. 

“Yeah because the Cullens are freaks.” Mike said.

“You got that right.” Sam said.

“They are not, I am dating one of those “freaks” you know.”

Sam looked at me shocked, I thought I could see a hint of anger. Before I could ask what was wrong he asked me to come with him. I obliged and followed him I could hear Bella ask if Jacob and Quill knew him and all she got in response was... 

“The Cullens don’t come here.”

I knew that would drive her suspicion of them even more, and I couldn’t do a thing about it.

“What’s wrong Sam?”

“Are you really dating one of them?”

“Yes, I am.”

“Which one?”

“Jasper.”

“Oh this is great, just great.”

“What is the problem with that!?” I asked getting agitated.  

“Did you not listen to our tribe story at all?”

“It’s just a story... isn’t it? They aren’t really a enemy of yours right? Is there something you’re not telling me!?”

Sam just looked at me and then looked down again. He didn’t know what else to do. He grabbed me a few moments later though my the arms and pulled me closer. His grip felt bruising on my pale skin.

“You need to stay away from them.” 

“Sam get off of me.”

“You need to listen to me Fleur.”

“You’re hurting me Sam.”

“FLEUR!”

“I said GET OFF!” 

I pushed him back and looked at my arms, bruised in the shape of hands made it’s way onto my skin. Sam’s eyes soften after he saw the bruises, he muttered a apology and then left before I could get another word in. I stood there confused, my mind couldn’t process it all. He had never acted like that toward me before. 

“Hey Fleur!” I heard Bella call for me.

I turned around and slipped on my sweater hiding the marks Sam left on me.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine. What did you need?”

“I just heard this crazy story about Jacobs tribe... have you heard of it?”

“I remember Sam telling me about when I was younger.”

“Do you think it holds any truth?”

“I’m not sure.” I answered half truthfully.

“Oh...”

“Why did you want to know?”

“I just thought... never mind, it’s silly.”

“Okay, let’s go home, I’m freezing.”

“Yeah let’s go.”

By the time we had arrived back home the air had somehow gotten even colder. My breath could be seen in the cold, fridge air. We both rushed inside, dad was out so I made dinner for all 3 of us. I left his food in the fridge for him to heat up late. As soon as I made it up to my room my phone rang. I picked it up not seeing who it was.

“Hello?”

“Hey Darlin.”

“Jazz hey.”

“Did everything go alright down at the reservation?” 

“Yeah, everything we fine.” I lied... he couldn’t know what happened today. He tried to kill someone.

“Well, there is something that happened with Bella...”

“Yes?” He asked waiting for me to continue.

“She heard the tribes story on you guys and well... it got her suspicious about you guys again. I think she knows what you guys are, or is about to figure it out.”

“It was bound to happen, Edwards too enamored with her to stay away from her.”

“I figured he had a thing for her.”

“Anyway, I was mainly calling to tell you I can’t come tonight and we won’t be in school tomorrow.”

“Is the sun finally gonna come out?”

“Yes, and we all need to go on a hunting trip. I’ll see you later tomorrow night”

“Well okay, stay safe tomorrow.”

“I will, love you.”

“Love you too.” He hung up a few seconds afterward.

I plugged my phone in and went to bed soon after.

Sure enough, the sun was out the next morning. It burned my face as I raised myself up. I picked out slightly cooler clothes today, thinking the sun would the area up a bit today. The drive to school was nice the air coming through my windows woke me up faster. The music was another plus, it was good again today.

Oh joy's arise The sun has come again to hold you Sailing out the doldrums of the whole week The polyphonic prairies here, it's all around you It's all around you, out here

And if the whole world is crashing down Fall through space out of mind again Where the emptiness we leave behind on warm air rising Blows all the shadows far away

Empire Ants, By the Gorillaz.

Classes were quite boring without Jasper there and they seemed to drone on longer than usual. But, I soon made it to lunch. I was sitting outdoors today with Bella, Jessica, and Angela. Bella was looking around, her eyes scanning to find the Cullens. Jessica noticed this and decided to help Bella with her curiosity.

“They’re not here today. The Cullens are never in when the suns out.”

“Do they just ditch?” Bella asked.

“No, Dr. and Mrs. Cullen pull them out for hiking and stuff.” I explained.

“Oh my gosh guys I did, I asked Eric out to the prom, I took control. He said yes.” Angela stated excitingly.

“See we told you that would happen.” I said.

“Are you sure you have to leave town Bella?”

“Yeah, it’s a family thing.”

“Why doesn’t Fleur have to go?” Jessica asked.

“I’ve never really been close with mom, besides I’m going with Jasper to prom anyway.”

“Oh.”

“We better go to Port Angeles before all the dresses get cleared out.”

“Port Angeles?” You mind if I come with you guys?” Bella asked.

“Yeah, I need your opinion. Are you going to come too Fleur?” Angela asked.

“Yeah sure. I’ll go.”

Time skip to Port Angeles.

“I like this one.” Angela said.

“Yeah I really like the beading.” Jessica added.

“That one is nice but, I think Lavender is more your color.” I said to Angela.

“Yeah me too.”

“I like this dusty rose one too but I think this one is better.” Jessica said.

I heard a knock on the window that made me jump. A group of men started cat calling us. I rolled my eyes and flipped them off, kicked the window slightly in the process.

“What do you think Bella?” Angela asked.

“You guys look good.”

“You’ve said that about the last 5 dresses though.” Jessica replied.

“I thought they were all pretty good.”

“This isn’t really your thing is it?” Angela asked.

“No, not really... I planned on going to this bookstore. I’ll meet you guys at the restaurant.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah absolutely. Hey Fleur I know you were looking for some new books to read. Why don’t you come me?” Bella asked.

“Sure, I’ll go.”

We both left the store, I followed Bella since I didn’t know where she was taking me.

“I’m not going to lie... I’m trying to find this book about that story Jacob told me about.”

“Why?”

“I just have a gut feeling there is something more to the Cullens. I feel bad prying into there business but, if you don’t even know... I feel the need to find out.”

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes, I do.”

I knew I couldn’t change her mind, she is just as stubborn as me. It was dark by the time we left the bookstore. I didn’t have a good feeling in my stomach, I felt like something bad would happen. I soon saw those group of men that cat called us in the dress store. We turned to the side trying to get away from them but, the cornered us.

“Hey, it’s my girls from the dress store.”

“Where are you two going, why don’t you hang out with us.”

They got closer, we both started to get uncomfortable.

“Don’t touch me.”

“Get away from me.”

“Oh c’mon don’t play hard to get.”

“I said don’t touch me.” I demanded I then kneed one of the men in the groin. He bowed down in pain. Another man had pushed me onto the ground.

Edwards volvo then screeched into view, it parked soon after. Edward and Jasper came shooting out of the car. A deadly look was marked on there faces. If looks could kill, all five men would be dead. Jasper ran toward me at normal human speed and help me up. He help me against his chest and walked me toward the car.

“Get in.” I heard Edward say.

We were all in the car, Edward was driving recklessly. The tension was uncomfortable but at the same time, I felt safe.

Who knew shopping for dresses would’ve led to this?

[panlight]

I really love that you're still blogging about twilight, there aren't a lot of people who still keep up with the fandom anymore! thanks for being around ^^

Aww, thank you!

When this blog started, the tumblr Twilight presence was either “Twilight is the greatest love story of all time, Edward/Bella are goals, SM is a genius, I like my men cold dead and sparkling” or “If you enjoy Twilight on ANY level you are irredeemably stupid and bad, it is the Worst Thing in the Universe, lololol sparkling vampires, still a better love story than Twilight, etc.” 

I never fell into either of those camps, and I found a pleasant group of likeminded “critical/LOL fans” who liked to talk about the parts they like, but also critique it both in terms of writing/style/plot as well as point out problematic elements, and to joke about it. But I’d still get asks once in awhile that would be like “LMAO YOU LIKE TWILIGHT HOW EMBARRASSING” and also “why do you blog about Twilight if you hate it so much?” and it was always like, how am I getting both of those responses from the same content????  I don't get that much anymore with the Renaissance; we're on a similar wavelength.

I guess the best way to explain it is not in terms of “do I like it or not?” but that it INTERESTS me. I’m fascinated by the phenomenon. I’m fascinated by some of SM’s bizarre choices. I’m fascinated how it parallels or deviates from traditional portrayals of vampires and werewolves and immortality. There’s just so much that’s weird here, and so much wasted potential with pretty much . . . every single character. I wanna get in there and fix it. It’s like a big box of Legos and I want to take apart what SM built and rearrange them this way, or maybe if this piece went over there, or if we just got rid of this part entirely, or. . .  

If Twilight had been “good” I probably would be over it by now. It’s because it’s such a weird mish-mash of “oh that’s a compelling idea” and “why would she write it THAT way?” and “YIKES” that there’s just endless things to talk about. 

In summation: It makes no damn sense. Compels me, though. 

Thanks for coming along for the ride. 

[gisellelx]

Is carisle your favourite character? If so why? If you don’t mind me asking

He is.

Simply, I always like a dad character. In my own (entirely unpublished) work, one of the first characters I ever created was actually very similar to Carlisle--he's the beloved dad of several adopted kids, who never set out to be a dad. So on one level, he really reminds me of my own character, Mark, and I was predisposed to liking him best.

My regular reading skews toward contemporary fiction and literary fiction, not romance; a friend convinced me to read Twilight so she’d have someone to talk to (She thought I wouldn’t like it. 12 years later, joke’s on her.). So the Edward/Bella romance was just fundamentally uninteresting to me. Add that to having almost a decade of writing experience under my belt at that point, and that led me to be drawn to the character who was the most interesting from a writing standpoint, rather than the ones the author wanted me to be most interested in.

Carlisle has one of the more interesting stories in canon. He's almost undoubtedly a Puritan, raised not to be particularly tolerant of people who don't adhere to his brand of faith. But that's not who he is--he's this weird pacifist who is probably trying to absolve what he thinks of as a form of original sin by obsessively saving human lives.

He also has some of the most interesting internal conflicts in the story—he has to sacrifice many of the things he cares about (like not killing other vampires, keeping peace with the Quileutes, being at least on reasonably good terms with the Volturi) throughout the saga. He and Esme have a very strange, very tenuous relationship that is full of problems and unresolved issues. Getting into his head about those things is a heck of a lot more interesting to me than getting into Edward or Bella's heads about how lovely they find each other.

There's a lot of moral ambiguity to a lot of what he does, which he sometimes acknowledges and sometimes absolutely does not. He is racist. He is misogynistic. When the chips are down, he cares the most about himself and second about his family, and at a distant third the rest of humanity. Yet Edward's take is that he is the Saint of all Saints. That's tension, in a beautiful form that generates great storytelling.

Finally, I am fundamentally a NERD which I don't think many of my Twific contemporaries really understood back in 2009-2010 when I first started writing fic. Carlisle, more than just about any other character in the immediate canon, gives me a lot of room to just research my heart out about really interesting things I don't already know—art history, medicine, religion and many others, and I genuinely enjoy that. That aspect of his character was way underutilized by SM, as far as I'm concerned—if he’s an art collector, don’t just show me three artists. Tell me why he’s got these pieces; use artists whose work has particular meanings; show me the character through the stuff he’s got! SM does not do this. So I have fun researching and learning new things so I can sprinkle them in in ways that enrich his characterization.

So yeah, as a writer, I like him a lot. I'll probably never stop being fascinated by him. I'm glad SM put him down on the page and then did so little, because there's so much room for coloring in.

[all-my-love-for-harry]

Watching Twilight with Harry.

summary: y/n forces harry to join her in her Twilight marathon.

word count: 1.5k

warnings: none! just tons of fluff

a/n: alright, folks. here’s the result of me going through my Twilight phase again. Enjoy! also, i should turn into a series watching tv with harry lmao

You can find the rest of my masterlist here

*:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･: *:･ﾟ✧ ✧ﾟ･:

Life was full with guilty pleasures. It could be a movie, a TV show, a food, even a celebrity. Y/N’s guilty pleasure was Twilight. She wasn’t sure why, but there was something about those movies that made her feel all blissful and excited, like she was a teenager all over again. And she enjoyed that.

Enjoyable things was exactly what she needed in order to not lose her mind during lockdown. Two months in and Y/N thought there was nothing else she could do that she hasn’t done already, so it was safe to say she was starting to feel a little trapped

One afternoon, Harry was out getting groceries and some other things they needed for the house and Y/N was just chilling in the living room, waiting for him to come back. As she scrolled down her instagram, she received a message from one of her cousins. It was just an inside joke about how they thought vampires were so cool when they were younger, and as she giggled, her brain clicked.

I wanna watch twilight. She thought.

Without giving it a second thought, Y/N turned on the TV and searched for the movies on Netflix. Deciding she’d watch the first one, she got comfortable on the couch before pressing play.

You see, everybody would agree the first movie of the saga was poorly edited and overall not that great, and although she’d cringe a lot during it, it was hilarious to watch years after it went out.

Y/N was so into the movie, almost drooling over Robert Pattinson, that she didn’t even hear Harry open the front door. “Babe?! I’m home!”

Harry’s voice snapped her out of her focus on the movie. “In the living room!” she answered. The curly-haired man gave her a dimpled smile before running upstairs to take a quick shower. Every time one of them went out of the house, they’d strip out of their clothes and take a shower in one of the guest bathrooms as a precaution.

He came back around twenty minutes later to put the groceries away and after doing so, he went to the couch and left himself fall next to his girlfriend making a ‘plop’ noise. “What are you watching?”

“Twilight.” She said, not taking her eyes off the screen but moving closer to Harry. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, letting her fingers play with his hand without paying much attention.

“The one about the vampires?” He chuckled.

“Yeah, did you ever watch it?” she finally turned to look at him. For a split second he thought about teasing her about watching cringy 2008 cliché movies, but he noticed the way her eyes were light up with excitement, so he decided to shut up.

“I watched the first one, but because of Gemma.” He said. “But never watched the other ones. There’s other ones, right?”

“There’s five of them, and we’re watching them all.”

“Are we now?” He asked, squeezing her a little.

“You just said you’ve never watched the rest, you bet your ass we’ll watch them now.”

“Ugh, fine. Just because I love you.” He cupped her face with his free hand, forcing her to look at him. He planted a sweet kiss on the top of her nose before letting her eyes focus on the screen again.

To be honest, Harry couldn’t care less about what they were watching, but what he did love was the comments Y/N would make during it. She’d throw jokes, make fun of the character’s choices or mannerisms and while some people find it annoying when a person couldn’t shut up during movies, Harry happened to love that about her. He thought that without those little comments here and there, he’d die of boredom.

“Edwards is so cute!” She nearly squealed. “I swear to god he was like, the love of my life when I was fourteen.”

“I think I like the Jacob guy better.” He stated.

“No, you don’t. He gets annoying in the next ones so be prepared.” They kept watching in silence, until Y/N’s favorite scene came out. “God, this was such a cultural reset.”

“Babe, they’re playing… baseball.”

“Iconic.”

Harry couldn’t help but laugh at the last scene of Bella and Edwards dancing at prom. “Holy shit, that’s awkward babe.”

The first movie ended and Y/N was quick to put the second one and this time, Harry paid a little more attention because he hasn’t seen it before.

“Oh my god, why would he throw her to the freaking wall when he could’ve just pushed the other dude out of the way.” He said.

“Am I right? That was so dramatic.”

They reached the scene where Edward leaves Bella alone in the woods after he told her he didn’t want her anymore. “But he was lying right?”

“Yeah, he did it so she’d forget about him.” She said. “But homegirl was depressed. I swear there’s nothing more Twilight than having life changing conversations in the middle of the woods.”

Y/N cuddled closer to Harry, wrapping one of her arms around his torso. She had to admit New Moon wasn’t her favorite out of the whole saga, but it was just because she didn’t get to see Edward enough, and God knows how much Y/N loves some Edward Cullen screen time. However, Harry was pretty much enjoying himself.

“Of course she went with my man Jacob.” He smirked and wiggled his eyebrows when Y/N looked up at him.

“Oh my god.” She snorted. “I hate that he’s a minor and Bella is already 18.”

“The vampire is like, a hundred years older than her.”

“That’s hot.”

Harry let out a big belly laugh, having a hard time to catch his breath. Now, he couldn’t be jealous of her little teenage crush, and he actually found it quite adorable and hilarious at the same time.

“So she’s trying to get herself killed or something?”

“She’s trying to see Edward.”

“Why?! He felt her alone in the middle of the woods!”

“He thought he was doing the right thing!” She defended. “You know, I actually cried in the theater when I went to watch it. My sister doesn’t let that die.”

“Should I send a video to Molly when you start crying?” He teased.

“Don’t be mean.” She pouted. Harry copied her before pressing his lips on hers gently.

“Look, the vampires are back, yay.”

She giggled but turned back to the television anyway. It was the scene were Alice went back looking for Bella, then there was the scene were Jacob and Bella were alone in the kitchen and the phone rang.

“I hate this part.” She said, clinging into Harry’s arm.

“He made him believe she was dead.” Harry’s lips went into an ‘o’ shape, surprised. “Is he going to kill himself?”

“That’s his plan. Keep watching.” She told him. “God, poor Edward looked so bad.”

“Ooh, I like that car.” Harry pointed at the yellow Ferrari Alice stole in Italy. “Should we get a car like that?”

“To keep it in the garage until we can go out again?”

“I won’t be needing your services after all, gentlemen.” They heard Edward said.

“He says that like he was ordering his own murder on postmates.” Y/N scoffed, making her boyfriend laugh.

“Oh my god, he flies.” Harry said when the vampires started fighting and Edward was sent to the other side of the room.

They were reaching the end of the movie, were Bella made the Cullens vote to see if she’d become a vampire or not.

“If I were a vampire, would you turn into one for me?” Harry asked suddenly.

“Why are you the vampire? I have the most knowledge.”

“Baby, Twilight knowledge is not vampire knowledge.” He pinched her cheek.

“Whatever.” She scoffed. “And of course I’d do it. You’d be a pretty grumpy vampire if I wasn’t with you.” She gave him a playful smile.

“True.”

It was the last scene. Bella, Jacob and Edward were in to woods again, and the two men were going to start a fight.

“… Don’t make me choose, because it’ll be him. Is always been him.”

“Girl, same.” Y/N said.

“Heeeey.” Harry furrowed his eyebrows playfully.

Y/N put her hand on Harry’s thigh, knowing what was coming next.

“He’s gonna do it.” She squealed.

“Do what?”

“I have one condition, if you want me to do it myself. And then forever. Marry me, Bella.”

“Hell yes.”

“It ends like that?” He asked.

“Yep. Imagine having to wait another year to watch the next one.”

“Didn’t you read the books? You knew what’s gonna happen.”

“I mean, yeah. But what’s the fun in it if I can’t see Robert Pattinson’s face?”

“Alright, that’s enough for today.” He took the remote from her hands and hid it behind his back.

“Give it back, we have to watch the next one!”

“All I’m seeing is my girlfriend thirsting over a bloody vampire!”

“C’mon, I’m thirsty over you too.” She rolled her eyes.

“Now we’re talking.” Harry came closer to her so their faces were only inches away. He looked down to her lips then back to her eyes, smirking when he noticed her blushing. “You’re not too bad yourself, love.”

“Gee, thanks.”

He chuckled, giving her back the remote but not without stealing a little kiss from her. He went out of the couch and Y/N protested immediately. “Lemme go to the bathroom first, woman!”

“Don’t take too long, we still have work to do!”

[notquitetwilight]

character asks: Alice

Sexuality Headcanon: Either bi or ace

Gender Headcanon: I can see Alice using either exclusively she/her pronouns or she/they pronouns tbh

A ship I have with said character: Book!Jalice doesn’t really make sense to me like they are kinda flat chemistry wise and come across more as best friends (on Alice’s part anyway) in my opinion; I feel like Alice has the energy of a cool fashionista wine aunt who is hyper career-focused, values her independence and doesn’t care about marriage or kids lol. I keep joking that Jasper is the Jorah Mormont to Alice’s Daenerys Targaryen bc of that absolutely iconic “I know you love me. Thanks” line from Midnight Sun dhisshshskdhsos

But I do think Ashley and Jackson’s chemistry made them seem much more believable as a couple than they were in the books. I think Jasper in general is only really redeemed by Jackson’s portrayal of him though bc Smeyer wrote him in such a gross way. I can’t really picture Alice with anyone else so ship-wise I would say Movie!Jalice or single Alice or girl Alice with girl Jasper aka Jessamine?

A BROTP I have with said character: Alice x Bella (wish we got more of their book relationship in the movies), Alice x Edward, Alice x Emmett, Alice x Rosalie (for the love of god give me sister content or give me death), I even loved the Alice x Jacob companionship of Breaking Dawn, a book that offered very little to like!

A NOTP I have with said character: Alice x Aro, Alice x Jane or Alec (they are CHILDREN!!!!!!) I am not kidding when I was 13 I used to see people write romance fics for them

A random headcanon: Like I’ve joked about before, I think Alice would be the worst with Resume bc she doesn’t remember being a kid and hasn’t been around children as a vampire prior to Resume. I’ve also word-vomited some human/early-Cullen Alice headcanons here and some things I headcanon about Alice’s relationship with her adoptive family here 💞

General Opinion over said character: 13-year-old me based my entire identity on her during my first Twilight phase dhdhskskv so she will always hold a special place in my heart. I love her as much as I can love a Smeyer-written character and one thing that struck me about Midnight Sun was that I had forgotten just how major a character she is in the books because she doesn’t get much screen time in the movies. Books wise she’s arguably the most developed/fleshed-out character outside of the main love triangle but again I wish she could have been developed beyond purposes that mostly serve the love triangle characters. Where’s her trauma/fear over not remembering her human life? How did she adjust to a family dynamic when she doesn’t remember what it’s like to be part of a human family unit? How does she have such a strong personality/connection to and care for others/interest in typically “human” things (as opposed to living a fairly feral existence reliant on instinct) when she has never known anything but vampirism? There is so much about her that’s interesting and could be further developed/explored. But anyway forever my psychic fashion heux queen 3627291926820292820/10 would recommend 💕💓💘💖💞