#Edit: seems like someone noticed the scarf

[akaruiakiki]

[The Early Bird Kills The Human] CW: eyestrain, kinda If Hatoful became a horror RPG or something IDK this idea kind of came into me in a dream and I must draw. I also just wanna draw something that kinda looks like a game and yeah the staff became third years and Anghel became a first year to balance out the gang (and to get him to hangout with Nageki)

[rxzennia]

echoes from afar

– tales of the voracity pathstrider

✎𓂃 your friends… they call for you. this was from a few version updates ago, but i've been mad busy and unmotivated these days… :( lore with a sprinkle of aventurine. a very, very tiny sprinkle. so i thought i could get this up last week. i am a clown. also, samsung's one ui 6 is so ugly (edit: i got used to the ugly ui. still doesn't quite like it, though. but i got used to it enough to tolerate it). 

→ part ii (wip? deciding. lmk if a sequel sounds cool.)

you didn't think you'd hear your own species ever again. oroboros is somewhere in the universe, qlipoth was probably keeping them out of where civilizations are, and the rest are all either dead or scattered. but here you are, hearing distant screeches from a star system lightyears away from yours, the sound slowly getting closer, closer, closer.

the war between aeons seems inevitable now that you've walked the land amongst mortals, seen their strife, and tasted the ever-so-familiar touch of entwining paths heralding the conflict. the longer you spend living, masquerading as someone who will someday die, you see the violent undercurrents under every calm ocean, as if everything is running on a countdown.

of course, you will never truly understand any of that; time has never been a limited resource for you.

you can almost hear the screeches of your own kin right by your ear

but you know, clear as day, that there's only you on the balcony right now

you're alone on the balcony of aventurine's bedroom, your boss snoring away comfortably cuddled up to his cats

you haven't been able to sleep for a while

not since you've heard the first cry of a leviathan in literally ages

leviathans seldom communicate with one another, so why would they suddenly reach out now?

and you were fairly certain that oroboros is the only other one left

well, the only one that's still actively doing who-knows-what somewhere, anyways

either what you're hearing is the lingering cries of those who are already gone

or you're delusional and you're hallucinating

aventurine doesn't seem to notice your absence, probably because of his abundance of things to cuddle with apart from your person. a good thing, you suppose, because your chronically stressed boss needs his beauty sleep.

you don't intend to drag anyone into your worries. it's nothing you can't handle alone – or, rather, it's not something mortals can handle, even with an organization as robust as the ipc. your existence, your true descent of a dusk leviathan, your connection to the aeon of voracity, none of which are burdens your companions should bear. 

it's these quiet moments when your kin raises their voices and sing in your ears

no, scrap that poetic shit, more like screech in your ears

they recognize prey, they recognize a hunting ground, a free-for-all

it's only natural, you suppose, lest predators start to devour each other in hunger

they're trying to locate you, the sound echoing, bouncing back, as they seek out food

"i'd strongly advise against doing that," you mumble, patting your scarf idly, as if you can't be bothered to care

they're not too far from where your true form slumbers, it seems, and it's easier than a cakewalk to force them into submission

and yet, you cannot locate them

you have their general location, but you can't pinpoint their exact coordinates

you try again, and again, until you come to a realization

they're dead a long time ago; there is nothing for you to find

their wails echo into nothingness, a void that is even more empty than oroboros's stomach

by the time you realize the purpose of these ancient cries, your true form is already stirring from its slumber. in all its majesty, its maw parting to split heaven and hell, until it swallows the carcasses of your kin, until it slithers through the stars, seeking out its next meal.

for the first time in the entire two thousand amber eras of your "existence", you feel hungry. famished, even, and it is a strange feeling.

have you gotten too accustomed to the mundane?

have you been domesticated?

quite some good questions, actually

how long has it been since you've actually allowed yourself the pleasure of devouring planets?

far too long

but it's wrong to eat civilizations

it's wrong to put an end to so many histories and futures because you were feeling peckish

it doesn't even actually "fill" you, so that's just triple the wrong

well, by the textbook definition of wrong, anyways

you don't really understand, but you know the general consensus of "eating people bad"

but your stomach yearns for the familiar feeling of life in its void

you turn around to take a peek at the peacefully sleeping man in the bed, safely tucked away in the blankets

a perfect prey right there, defenseless and unsuspecting

it would be so easy to just gobble him up without anyone noticing

and you could slip away just as easily

your entire profile is fabricated – you can always just make another "you" elsewhere 

but you find yourself extremely reluctant to even wake your extension coiled around the oddly-shaped cats

you find the trust that mortals impart upon you a gift of most intrigue

it is such a fragile, precious thing, and yet they offer it to you freely

especially this man who you serve as an assistant…

aventurine. 

it isn't even his real name, but you find yourself mouthing the syllables again and again. this man who is bestowed the title of a gemstone, wielding the power of the amber lord who strives to protect mortals from your kind like you're some sort of eldritch horror, yet also the one who has you wrapped around his finger.

and you're one of the select few he holds close to his heart. against all odds, he had let you into his heart, see his wounds and scars, and trusts you with all of them. he might act the way he does, but you know how delicate he is underneath all that bravado.

out of curiosity, you try to move the leviathan amongst the pile of limbs, sheets, and felines

as you expected, it doesn't want to answer

it seems that your body doesn't want to act on any malicious intents

you really did get domesticated… 

oh, aeons, it'll come back and bite you in the ass someday, won't it?

even if you have no qualms about eating anything that's not intelligent 

like monsters and stuff

but still

you shouldn't have developed aversion to devouring entire persons

…

it is what it is, you suppose

but holy fuck, those screeches from galaxies away just would not stop

"fucking oroboros, shut the hell up already," you groan, pulling up your scarf to muffle your complaints, "i'm not eating anyone here."

if there was someone behind all this pestering, you definitely would've gone and beaten them up. but. but. there's no one behind this. none that you can think of.

unless it really is oroboros themselves, which you'll have an even bigger problem on your hands. you really hope it isn't.

the noises clear up into words, whispering into your ears

consume. devour. feed. destroy. 

cast them into the void. let them be your sustenance. take their power as your own.

you are a predator. why are you among prey?

they are many but fragile. why do you still hesitate?

no.

no, they are not fragile.

they are not prey.

they are not sustenance.

do not speak of them as if they are nothing but food.

what do you know of the people inhabiting the countless planets in the cosmos?

what do you know of the storms they have weathered?

humanity is stronger than you would ever know.

tonight will be a long night, it seems. you can only hope that this doesn't manifest as some sort of personality disorder. come morning, these thoughts will go away as your mind becomes occupied with work.

there are four system hours until then. 

a leviathan like you, a monster of the cosmos… 

shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up.

be quiet already.

wish as you may, they will continue to torment you.

why? because they seek answers.

how long will you keep wearing the skin of sheep?

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Is there a reason Marinette’s lying to Adrien about Gabriel doesn’t make sense to you from a character-standpoint? She’s lied a fair bit in the show for reasons other than keeping her identity or crush on Adrien a secret, and her love for Adrien has consistently created a blind spot for her in terms of her “general” morals/behavior.

Is there something more specific to Marinette’s pattern of behavior that indicates how her lying about Gabe would be OOC, or is the lie something you believe Canon!Marinette should recognize as too egregious to take part in?

(The closest alternative explanation I’ve seen thus far is that she shouldn’t have any reason to lie for Gabe because they share zero good will, but if we interpret it as lying for Adrien, then I’m not sure if that explanation fits.)

I have, admittedly, not gone through the show and tracked every lie that Marinette has ever told to see if I can weave together a pattern that backs Marinette's behavior at the end of season five. It's possible that there's a lie that I'm forgetting that would totally change my stance and, if you think that's the case, then feel free to respond to this with a comment or an ask on that topic! My "this is BS" stance is based on the overall story of the show and the ways that I've seen people try to justify the season five lies as those are the arguments that I've thought through and found lacking.

We'll start by discussing the two lies people use to try to back Marinette's behavior at the end of season five: the scarf and Chat Blanc. Then I'll talk about the story's lead up to the season five lies and why it makes for a horribly unsatisfying story in my eyes. If someone gave this to me, I'd be suggesting some major edits to make it work on a technical level.

The Scarf

For those who don't remember, the season one episode The Bubbler sees Marinette make Adrien a scarf for his birthday. She drops the scarf off at the Agreste mansion with a note for Adrien and the hope that this will get him to finally notice her. Nathalie then takes the scarf and uses it as a gift from Gabriel instead. Marinette learns about this during this exchange at the very end of the episode:

Alya: Yo, nice scarf, Adrien. Off the chain. Adrien: Yeah, can you believe my dad got this for me? (Marinette looks surprised) it's so awesome. He's been giving me the same lame pen for three years in a row.... Alya:(to Marinette) You gotta tell him you were the one who knitted the scarf. Marinette: But he seems so happy about his dad. I don't want to spoil it for him. Alya: Aw, Marinette. (they hug.) You're amazing, girl. You know that, right? And someday Adrien will figure it out too. Promise.

I can see why someone would look at this and call it a setup for the end of season five. There are some parallels here. The problem is that there are a lot of massive differences, too. Differences that make this a really crappy setup:

Marinette does not lie in this scene. She simply overhears a lie and doesn't correct it. Remove her and Alya from the scene and nothing changes. The lie still exists. Meanwhile, without Marinette, the season five lies would never have come to be.

Marinette knows about the scarf lie for about a minute on screen. She hears about it and tells Alya to let it go within the same scene. That's a gut reaction, not a carefully planned and considered deceit. Once again, wildly different from what season five gives us.

Adrien and Marinette aren't shown to be close friends in season one. They rarely talk to the point that I didn't even know that they were supposed to be friends until we got to Origins. That complicates correcting the scarf lie. How does Marinette approach a random classmate and explain a situation that she doesn't even fully understand herself? That's very different from Ladybug telling a lie to a civilian or Marinette lying to her boyfriend.

Season one Marinette has no idea how messed up Adrien's home life is. All she knows is that Adrien liked her gift, but that he thinks it came from a different person. She doesn't even know that a lie was involved in this confusion! As far as she's aware, this could just be a minor misunderstanding that she'd rather let go because does it really matter who the gift is from? This is extra true because the scarf never comes up again, meaning that this is not an ongoing or damaging lie as far as canon is concerned.

That last point and the issue of Marinette never actually telling the lie herself are probably the biggest points in Marinette's favor. If Adrien wore the scarf all the time and used it as a comfort when he was fighting with his dad, then you'd have a solid case for Marinette needing to say something because the lie is arguably doing actual harm. This is especially true if you let Adrien say things like, "I wear this to remember that my father loves me," to Marinette. But that's not what canon did.

As far as canon is concerned, the scarf lie exists for all of a minute. A minute in which Adrien expresses delight in the gift, but gives it very tepid weight in terms of what it means for his relationship with his father. (Adrien's room is full of nice gifts, I don't think a scarf was going to make-or-break their relationship.) After that, the scarf never comes up again, meaning that Marinette's gut reaction to not immediately destroy Adrien's happiness is all we get. That's hardly a great setup for her being the source of massive ongoing lies about Adrien's personhood and the truth of his father's abuse.

I'll also remind you that this all happened at the very start of the show. The Bubbler is one of the first episodes people see. If this is your best argument for Marinette's behavior five seasons later, then we have a major writing problem on our hands. You should not have to dig back to the very start of the show to justify a major character beat like this. There should be more relevant material. We'll circle back to that problem in a minute. First let's quickly touch on lie two and why it also falls flat.

Chat Blanc

Another thing people point to as foreshadowing for the season five lies is the fact that Ladybug kept Chat Blanc from Chat Noir and, if Chat Blanc was actually affecting her, then I would agree with this take. However, that doesn't seem to be the case. The official story is that Ladybug's actions in season four had nothing to do with Chat Blanc. It was just guardian stress! If that's true, then I don't think she should tell Chat Noir about Chat Blanc.

Why?

Since when do we tell people about all the awful things they did while they were akumatized? There's no point to that. It's cruel. Do you think that Ladybug also needs to walk him through everything he did while under the control of various akumas like Dark Cupid? If no, then how is Chat Blanc any different? What's the value in telling Chat Noir the gory details of what will happen if he ever has a moment of weakness and becomes akumatized? He already knows that it will be bad! Why tell him exactly how bad it will be? I can't come up with a single good canonical reason.

Ladybug has no idea what caused Chat Blanc, so she can't warn Chat Noir what he needs to avoid. You can't even use the "he should know about Bunnyx" argument because that wasn't Bunnyx's debut. Canonically speaking, the only reason that Ladybug should talk to Chat Noir about Chat Blanc or any other bad thing that he's done while under the power of an akuma is if it's effecting her or their partnership and it's apparently not! That's why Marinette never reacts to Chat Noir getting a white makeover (see: the Paris special & Jubilation) and why Chat Blanc is never discussed in the show outside of that one brief nightmare callback in Sentibubbler.

To be clear, I think that's an asinine choice as Chat Blanc's memory hurting Ladynoir would have been semi-decent foreshadowing for the season five lies, but the writers decided to go another route. They also let Chat Blanc haunt Adrien even though he doesn't know about it, which I don't even know how to dissect because it's such terrible writing! If you don't know what I'm talking about, this is the official explanation for why Adrien couldn't make it to the final fight. The reason for the white-and-blue Chat Noir that haunted his nightmares:

Mélanie says that he "could become Chat Blanc" and the others add that even though he does not remember and has never lived it, Chat Blanc still has an influence on his actions.

Quality writing here folks. Quality writing. At the very least have season five Adrien be freaked out about the fact that he cataclysmed a human! That would make this make at least a little sense, but we don't get that. Instead we get Adrien almost cataclysming several akumas like it's no big deal while having nightmares about a thing he's never even been told about (see: Derision and Jubilation and probably other's I'm forgetting.)

The Events of Season Four and Five

As you can hopefully see, we don't have a great, ongoing pre-end-of-season-five lie to point to as proof that Marinette would decide to tell the massive lies that she does. That's a pretty big writing flaw, but it's not a show stopper. A lie like this could still fit her character if the story sets it up right.

The problem is that the story doesn't do that. It actually sets Marinette up to be primed to want to tell the truth.

For all Miraculous' nonsensical and wacky writing, the season five lie still comes at the end of two seasons with relatively clear messages. Those messages were to trust others and avoid lies. Let me show you what I mean.

While season four's writing is an absolute disaster, we cannot ignore the fact that the stated lesson in Strikeback is that Marinette learned to trust others, give up control, and stop lying:

Ladybug: Why don't you just give up on me? I've lost ALL the Miraculous! I'm the worst Guardian EVER! I wanted to control everything, I didn't listen to you, I lied to you, I kept you at a distance! Every time you offered me a helping hand, I never took it! I really made a mess of EVERYTHING! (continues sobbing)

This is what Marinette says to Chat Noir directly after losing the Kwamis. This is the lesson that she supposedly learned. The end note of the season. The word of god meant to be internalized by children everywhere. The show even goes so far as to have Ladybug give Chat Noir more responsibility in the first episode of season five (Evolution):

Cat Noir: Catch, m'lady! (throws the Rabbit Miraculous at Ladybug and she catches it) Only the holder of the Rabbit Miraculous can open a time portal. Ladybug: (contemplates shortly then places the Rabbit Miraculous on his chest, smiling) You do it, kitty. Cat Noir: You want me to control time? Ladybug: It's you and me, remember?

Really driving home this idea that Ladybug is going to be more trusting and open with others moving forward.

The meat of season five sees Marinette and Adrien start dating. During this arc, Marinette learns to be more open with her feelings around Adrien while also being confronted with the reality of just how messed up Adrien's home life is. Marinette and Gabriel clash with each other over Adrien with Marinette fighting for Adrien's freedom and Gabriel trying to control everything:

Gabriel: I don't think you understand, child, so let me put things differently. Life is like fashion. You think you have a choice, but all you have is the illusion of choice. And I decide what choices are given to you. Marinette: You're wrong! (Shows Gabriel her sketchbook.) Fashion is about listening to people, it's about understanding who they are, what excites them and creating the clothes that will help them express their inner world. Help them connect with others and make their dreams come true.

This conflict means that Marinette and Gabriel do not have a single positive interaction in the entire season outside of maybe the final. We also see Adrien defy his father more than ever before. This is not the kind of setup you write if you want Marinette to tell Adrien that his father was a hero. Why in the world would she think that he'd want to be told that kind of lie? Why would he even buy it after all of the things that Gabriel has done? The final literally sees Adrien locked in a padded prison cell!!! Writers, what are you doing??? Why did you write this???

There's also the fact that season five has a major theme of lies = bad. It's the season where Lila's lies are finally outed, but only after they almost cost Marinette's friends their futures. For those who need a reminder: Lila tried to mess with the forms that stated where everyone wanted to go for lycée and would have succeeded in pulling off that harm and blaming it on Marinette were it not for the lies being outed.

On top of that, we also see Adrien keeping the plan to ship him off to London from Marinette, ending in this exchange:

Marinette: (on the video call) Adrien! Adrien: (voice breaking; in tears) Marinette, I should've told you sooner, but... up until the last minute, I thought I'd find a solution. I tried everything, I swear. Marinette: (on the video call) Adrien, what's... what's going on? Adrien: I have to leave Paris. (his voice breaks) I'm not worthy of your love. I feel terrible for hurting you.

Adrien kept the truth from Marinette to try to keep her from being hurt and ended up hurting her more than he otherwise would have because they don't even get a proper goodbye.

None of this is a solid setup for Marinette turning around and lying to Adrien about his father. Why would she do that after all of the harm lies and Gabriel caused in season five? Between this and season four, she has not been setup to want to lie to Adrien. Season five needs massive rewrites to make that choice work! (Note: I have yet to see the London special, but based on everything I've heard, I think it's just going to cement my annoyance at Marinette's wishy-washy writing by continuing to ignore the plot of the seasons leading up to the final and the special.)

Final Thoughts

I don't think that Marinette lying to Adrien about his dad is a terrible idea. It's a believable struggle! It just doesn't fit her character's journey. They've failed to have her tell that type of lie before and they had her tell this lie after two seasons where the main lessons were how much lies have hurt her and the people that she loves. If she hasn't gotten the message that you shouldn't lie by now, then when exactly is she going to learn it? It's incredibly hard for me to get invested in characters that aren't allowed to grow and learn from their mistakes and Miraculous has made it abundantly clear that it will not let these characters grow if growth messes with the plot that the writers want to tell.

I will openly admit that I think that Marinette's lie was a last minute retcon to make there be a cliffhanger to season six, but let's ignore that and give a quick three-point plan of how you could make this ending work:

Really lean into the negative consequences of people knowing the truth about things. Nino knowing Alya's identity outing Alya. Luka getting shipped off to Brazil. Make the truth hurt Marinette at every turn. Basically remove all lies = bad consequences and have Ladybug see losing the miraculous be the result of trusting others because she trusted "Adrien" and lost, leading her to keep pushing people away

Don't let Lila be outed. Have Lila be a good president and make that part of her big plan for the next season.

Have Gabriel and Marinette get along. Gabriel has said that Adrien is like Emilie, let Gabriel see himself in Marinette, leading Gabriel to trust Marinette to be Adrien's support should the worst happen. Let the final fight be a heartbreaking moment between two people who have an actual relationship built around loving Adrien. Have Adrien going to London be a "convenient" trip to get him out of the way on the day of the evil plot and not a prison sentence so that Gabriel doesn't look cartoonishly evil. Make it feel like he cares! Sell the redemption!

Do that and, yeah, I'd buy Marinette's choice even without setup lies because you don't need setup lies! Setup lies don't matter anywhere near as much as selling this lie and the writers simply didn't do that. I don't believe for a second that Marinette would lie for Gabriel or think that this was what Adrien wanted based on the relationship season five gave us for those three characters. It is so glaringly obvious that this is nothing more than a stalling tactic that has nothing to do with Marinette's character and everything to do with the show's rule that "there must always be a secret between Adrien and Marinette." I genuinely struggle to understand how anyone sees it as anything else.

[godsiero]

promises (found a title)

heyo, i’m back with PLOT and EXPOSITION. sorry it’s so long, but this is needed information! it could’ve been longer, but then i realized it was nearing 10k and decided to stop lmao. i actually edited and proofread this one before posting it like a big girl so i hope the five people who read it enjoy it! i love this so much, but also please criticise me.

chapter one is here

wc: 9k

warnings: physical abuse (oc), panic attack (oc), hurt/comfort (spencer is the sweetest), mentions of drug and alcohol abuse, general cm content, mentions of possible sexual harassment

__________________________________________

In the six months that had passed since joining the team, Claudia had started to fit right in, the same way Morgan had said she would. Any time she’d had off, she found herself sharing it with Spencer; discussing books and reading over the essays of past agents Blake and Lewis, whom he spoke highly of, and she wished she could’ve met them while they were on the team. They bonded over their time as professors, discussing the different experiences they’d had; Spencer with his classes full of auditing students (Claudia sensed there was something fishy behind that), Claudia with her classes full of boys who would never listen. That made Spencer a certain type of upset he couldn’t quite place. He’d ask her about it another time.

Claudia was the first person in a long time to hold a candle to Gideon when it came to playing chess with Spencer, again, it gave him a feeling in his chest he couldn’t quite place. When they played chess, they would either sit in silence, or they would both ramble off at each other about everything and nothing, and they quickly discovered they had a lot more in common than their academic tastes.

Claudia had put him in check during one of their games and mumbled “Allons-y!” under her breath in a tired haze. She hadn’t realized Spencer had heard her until she heard his laugh (which she enjoyed getting out of him, often, but that was neither here nor there).

“Were you showing me you’ve been working on your French, or were you quoting David Tennant’s doctor?” Spencer had his suspicions that Claudia had at least seen a little bit of the show. She had a scarf that was a subtler version of the fourth Doctor’s and sometimes he’d see her notes she would take during briefings and on the plane, and he’d notice she would doodle the different screwdrivers, but he’d never tell her he was looking so closely at something so small that was only meant for her to see. She would never tell him she’s noticed his wandering eye.

She smiled into herself, trying to avoid his gaze, cursing herself for outing one of her secrets so obviously. It was one thing to subtly hint she’d had the interest, it was another thing entirely to let it slip out so clearly. She’d wanted to wait a little longer before showing the team who she really, really was, but she thinks she’d be fine with him knowing her a little better than anybody else.

“What if it was both?”

Spencer raised his eyebrows and smiled, “Why didn’t you tell me! We could’ve been watching it together this whole time!”

Hearing him say the words “we” and “together” in the same sentence and referring to her gave her a certain sort of pride and honor she did not want to think too deeply about, considering he probably used the same words when talking about something else with someone else.

“I don’t know…” Claudia decided to come clean, partially, “I might have been…hiding a few things about myself for fear of seeming…juvenile?” She phrased it like a question because saying it out loud to someone for the first time made her feel really stupid and she suddenly regretted ever hiding herself from any of them, especially Spencer.

He looked her in the eyes, “Claudia. Your personal interests, no matter how ‘juvenile,’ do not diminish your intellect. Liking Doctor Who and having fun does not make you any less of an academic, it makes you human.”

She was surprised by how empathetic he was being. She’d gotten to know him on a personal and friendly level, and she was proud of that (especially since, according to Penelope, he was unusually quick to open up to Claudia), but she hadn’t expected him to be so…compassionate.

“I know, but…” she focused her gaze somewhere else, trying to think of a logical reason to explain away why she felt lying so profusely was necessary. She wanted them to know her, why was she still hiding?

“No, there doesn’t need to be a ‘but,’ you can just be honest, now. I’ve found you out, I know you’re a nerd, I know you’re a loser, just like me, it’s okay,” she knew he was joking, but he gave her a sympathetic look anyway, to prove it.

“First of all, doctor, you do not know a thing about me, in due time.”

“Oh, really?” he kept his playful air about him while going on his rant, “Then how do I know you’re never listening to a podcast when you have your headphones in? How do I know that you’re actually listening to a variety of music from various genres that are all subgenres of rock or metal? How do I know that your favorite of all of that music came out between the years of 2002 and 2008? How do I know that you often listen to the same songs over and over again because you can’t get enough of them until you catch an itch to listen to a different song approximately 12 times in a row, without getting bored? If I, presumably, don’t know a thing about you, how is it that I know, arguably, the most important thing about you?”

For lack of a better word, Claudia was speechless.

He had just made an absolute fool out of her and she couldn’t even say a word.

So she started laughing.

She wasn’t laughing at him. She was laughing at how stupid she had been to think she could’ve gotten anything past him, especially the thing that meant the most to her.

“Are you laughing because I’m right? Because I know I’m right. I know I tend to be right, but there is a less than 5% chance I’m wrong and just made an idiot of myself,” he was chuckling along with her.

Gasping for air while she spoke, or rather, yelled, “YES! Yes, god, you’re right, you’re right! But Jesus Christ, you didn’t have to hit the nail on the head, Spencer!”

He gave her a playful side-smile, “I knew I’d figure you out. You had me fooled for a while there.”

“That was the idea.”

“Why? I understood the fear of appearing juvenile, but, forgive me, your music taste is anything but. And that’s coming from someone who listens to Mozart and Bach.”

“I just wanted everyone to see me as this…proper…professional. I don’t know, being the youngest on a team full of people who have known each other for a decade is a little intimidating,” she was the one rambling, now, “so long story short I tried to hide everything that made me, me so everybody would like me and think I was incredible at this job, and it worked, I guess, because JJ and Emily come to me for advice and Morgan talks to me about his fatherly insecurities and Rossi invites me over to his mansion to discuss cultura e storia and I work out with Hotch and I don’t even know how I ended up in such situations, but it seems a thank you is in order to give to my fake self that is quiet, yet sassy, and firm, yet soft, and totally and completely calm any time you lay eyes on her, meanwhile Claudia Jessup is actually a loud and abrasive autistic freak who self-soothes by blasting music so loud, you’d think I’d gone deaf by now, and buying trinkets that make my heart flutter, and drinking coffee as much as I possibly can because it makes me feel like it’s always cold outside, and buying romance books because I just love reading about two people going stupid with how desperate they are for each other, and I also love the way they smell and how they feel when I flip all of the pages at the same time, and I love Peter Capaldi’s Doctor and I am tired of pretending he was a terrible choice.”

She finally gasped for air and came out of her self-induced tunnel vision to see Spencer. Still sitting across from her, at his chess table, in his apartment. He hadn’t stopped listening. He hadn’t gotten up and begun to ignore her. He hadn’t walked to the door to tell her to leave. He’d just listened. A grin adorned his face. He was bursting at the seams with pride. He was so happy to get the truth out of her. He’d gotten so close to her, so fast, that she’d let her mask slip a few times, and he was determined to crack her open, and he did. At first, he felt bad. He felt as though he’d pushed her too far, before she was ready, but he could tell, now, that she had needed to do that. She needed to stop hiding and lying.

“Feel better?”

She felt like she just finished with a manic episode. She was laughing with every exhale, she put her elbows on her knees, and put her hands on her forehead, staring at the ground, eyes wide, “Yeah. Yeah, I feel better. I feel…I feel like I just went supernova on you…”

“I certainly don’t feel like you just went supernova on me.”

“And I think if I stay here any longer, I might suck you into the black hole.”

She’d had breaks like this before. The end of a long period of masking. The beginning of the end was always an epiphany; it made her feel high. Then it was followed by panic; she felt like she’d gone too far, blown everything out of proportion, gone supernova. Then finally, she would bring everything in her wake down with her, in a fit of embarrassing, dramatic, and unintentional rage and emotion she’d never meant to place on anybody. She needed to get away from Spencer immediately; she didn’t want him to see that part of her. Ever.

In addition to the obvious, this conversation with Spencer, and his response and reaction, had flipped a switch inside of her. She’d realized there was something she needed to do before she could fully, officially open up to everybody on the team, and she thought she was finally in the position to do it. She got up from his chess table and started to get her things.

“Claudia, you don’t have to-”

“No, no, Spencer, it’s fine, I’m fine, I just…really don’t want you to see what happens next…”

“Where are you going?”

“I just…there’s something I need to do tonight.”

“I can go with you.”

“No, no, thank you, that’s okay. I need to be alone. I’ll see you Monday.”

“Okay…be safe.”

“I will, I promise. Get some sleep.”

“Okay…call me if you need anything.”

“I will.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

“Okay. Goodnight, Claudia”

“Goodnight, Spencer.”

As she left Spencer’s apartment, she double checked everything: her bank account, her lease, her insurance, her storage unit, her security system. She couldn’t believe it took her this long to act on the plan she’d been silently hatching with herself, but she needed to be positive she could do it by herself before making her first move.

Claudia spent the last five years in a relationship. She spent the last three years living with them. She spent the last two in self defense and boxing classes. Over the last six months, she’d been working up the courage to prove to herself she could survive on her own. Despite her time with the CSI, her time as a professor, and her time as a licensed therapist, she still had never been able to safely and securely leave. Something about Spencer figuring her out and her spilling her guts to him and him still hanging around without a trace of fear in his eyes made her realize she could’ve and should’ve done this years ago. She leveled with herself and said better late than never.

When she arrived home, he wasn’t there, thank god. She didn’t know how she was going to go about this, at all. She looked around and hated everything she saw. Like she told Spencer earlier, she would always buy little trinkets and toys and paintings and books and blankets and mugs she liked, but she never had anywhere to put them. Seeing things that brought her joy in a place that brought her so much pain made her feel stupid. She hated feeling happy around him. She didn’t want to give him the pleasure of even thinking he caused it, not that he would, he hated her just as much as she hated him. They barely even spoke or saw each other any more, neither of them were ever home at the same time, even before she got this job, not that she was complaining.

They did love each other, once. A long time ago. He thought she was smart, she thought he was alive. They liked the same music, ran in the same crowds, it seemed right, and it was for two years. It was nice, he was nice. Eventually, though, she’d started paying less and less attention to him. Not out of anything personal, but because her career had started falling into place; she’d become a professor at Penn, she’d been promoted with the CSI, and she’d kept clients for years, at that point; she’d gotten everything she’d wanted.

And he hadn’t. He built up a resentment towards her. He started partying more, drinking more, doing drugs, cheating on her (though he didn’t know she knew that). She didn’t know what she’d done wrong, but she knew something changed. It was when he came home in a drunken rage and hit her that she realized nothing would ever be the same. At the time, it had felt like a one-time-thing. You would think she would’ve left, given what she knew, but she saw it as an opportunity for a case study. Selfish? Of course, but she was putting herself at risk for the sake of science, she could live with that.

She had tried doting on him more, being kinder, going out of her way to please him, and she found he had been nicer, happier, more tolerant of her busy schedule. After a month, she started ignoring him again, throwing herself into her work, never coming home before he was asleep, and her theory was right, that set him off again. This time, he wasn’t drunk, and he beat the shit out of her. Shouting at her, spitting on her, very nearly breaking her bones, definitely leaving some deep cuts and bruises that took weeks to go away. In the middle of it all, she’d started taking classes to be sure if he ever went too far, she could fight back, and take him down. That went on until he got bored.

A year. She spent a year conducting this study. After he’d finally got tired of his affectionately abusive cocktail, he stopped paying attention to her entirely. That was when she really cracked down on her work, but the second she was able to focus totally and completely on that, Roy got sick. She would’ve finished her PhD early, but she started worrying about him. She stayed with him and cared for him as long as she could, until…

The months after were a blur. She focused on her work when she needed to. When she wasn’t working, she was at home. Not her apartment, but home, where she’d grown up. Going through everything, not that there was much. Roy was never a material kind of guy. He sure knew how to raise a material kind of girl, though.

She had taken far longer than she needed to. She didn’t want to leave that house. She didn’t want to go back to the one she lived in now. She didn’t want to be around him anymore. The day she had finished cleaning out the house was the day she decided to leave him, even though she didn’t know how. She knew it would take a while, but she promised herself, and Roy, that she would do it.

Claudia Jessup did not break her promises.

She’d had to move him to D.C. with her. He didn’t have to come, but he did. He could’ve ended it when she left Philadelphia, but he needed her for the same reason she needed him. She was about to rip that security out from underneath him, and she felt an excitement bubbling beneath her skin that was not unlike the adrenaline she experienced while out in the field.

She was determined to stay up until he got home. She didn’t know when, or if, that would happen tonight, but it didn’t matter. It was a promise she made herself, so she was going to keep it.

She got in the shower, taking advantage of the solitude and blasting her music for the first time in what seemed like forever. She needed it. She felt bad about leaving Spencer; she wanted to text him; she’ll do it when she gets out. She’d make it up to him on Monday, when she brought him his coffee.

That was a sweet exchange. Claudia had done into the bullpen with coffee from The Grounds. Not her favorite place to get a cup from, but certainly the closest and easily accessible on her way to work. You would never believe the absolute shock on her face when Spencer had entered her and Penelope’s conversation with a cup from Coci, her preferred choice of coffee shop in the harbour. She instantly started interrogating him about it.

“Is that from Coci?”

“Yeah, it’s not my favorite, but my favorite is kind of out of the way for me, so I settle for second best. Anything beats the pot here,” she feigned betrayal on her face at his admission.

“How dare you.”

“What?”

“How dare you say drinking from Coci is a ‘second best’ kind of experience,” she said dreamily.

“Because I believe it is. I don’t think it’s bad, it’s just not what I prefer. I’d love to get a cup from The Grounds, but that would add an extra twenty minutes to my commute, and that’s not worth it.”

She looked at him, dumbfounded, looked at her own coffee, and turned it toward him so that the label faced him.

“You mean…this ‘The Grounds’ coffee?”

It was Spencer’s turn to be playfully shocked, “Oh my god! You go to The Grounds?”

“Since moving here, yes, and I would say this is second best to my one true love, Coci.”

“Well I think it’s settled then. How do you take yours?”

“Black and scalding, why?”

“I’m going to start bringing you your order, if you don’t mind bringing mine. This seems a fair exchange.”

“You’re not “boy genius” for nothing, clearly,” he’d told her his coffee should have at least eight packs of sugar in it, which made her laugh. When he didn’t say he was joking, she looked very concerned, “Wait, seriously?”

“Seriously.”

With that, a tradition had started: every morning, Spencer had brought her her favorite black coffee and Claudia had brought him his favorite black coffee…with a ridiculous amount of sugar.

“Sugar with coffee,” she said.

“Coffee with nothing,” he replied.

They cheered each other and said that every single morning since then, and she’d hoped it would never stop.

She’d gotten so wrapped up in the memory, she didn’t hear her music stop playing because she was getting a phone call. She was in the middle of washing her face when she opened the shower curtain to see she was getting a call from Garcia. She rinsed off her face with record breaking speed and picked up her phone, while still halfway in the shower.

“Garcia?”

“Hi, hon. I know it’s late, or, uh, early, but we’ve got a case. Get here as soon as you can and be safe.”

“Okay. I’ll be there in thirty,” and she hung up the phone. She could’ve said twenty, but since it was four in the morning, she figured she may as well keep up appearances with Spencer, while it was on her mind.

She hadn’t realized how late it had gotten and instantly regretted having the music so loud, she’d hoped her neighbors wouldn’t mind. She got dressed and stepped out of the bedroom, running into him.

“Jesus, Devon, I didn’t even hear you come in,” she wasn’t afraid of him, but she was afraid of somebody coming into her home, so not hearing that he’d come in shocked her a little.

“Feeling a little jumpy, Claude? Your big girl job scaring you yet?”

“You? Scare me? Not in a million years. And don’t call me that,” she pushed past him and tried to get her go bag from the front closet, but he grabbed her arm and stopped her.

“Where are you going? It’s four in the morning on a Sunday.”

“One, I don’t have to tell you where I’m going. Two, this happens sometimes. Three, you’re drunk,” she could’ve pulled out of his grasp, but chose not to. Now was as good a time as ever to execute her plan. Case be damned, this needed to happen, now, or she wouldn’t have the opportunity again, for who knows how long.

He held onto her arm tighter, “What? You gonna arrest me for drinking, officer?”

“I’m not an officer. Let me go, Devon.”

“Why? So you can run off to your little brainiac?” he had let her go, but he did so by tossing her away.

“There is no way you are accusing me of cheating right now.”

“You’re not denying it.”

“Even if I was, which I’m not, why does it matter to you?”

He abruptly ran up to her, gripped her shoulders, and pinned her against the wall, gritting through his teeth, “Because I’d like to know if I need to teach somebody a lesson on loyalty.”

She spit in his face, then, which caused him to pull her off the wall and slam her head right back into it.

“You think you can treat me like that, bitch?” he was yelling now. She was holding the back of her head.

“Yes, actually, I do. You’re a drugged up drunk who beats on someone who’s never done a single thing to you besides stay with you through all of your bullshit, including cheating on her.”

He gave her a good backhand slap, that sent her to the ground, “You don’t know that, how do you know that?”

“I didn’t, but thank you for the confirmation,” she smiled a rueful smile at him and stood up. She felt blood running down her face. He had a ring he always wore on his finger that must’ve cut her face, when he hit it.

He hit her in the same spot and sent her to the ground again, this time with his fist.

“Keep ‘em comin’, Devon, beat the shit out of me like you always do!” at that, he put his hands around her neck, pulled her up, and slammed her against the wall again, this time cutting off her airway.

She choked out, “Go…a-ahead. Sh-show…the gov..ernment…what…y-you…can…do-”

He threw her to the ground at the reminder of her job, “God dammit Claudia, why do you have to be like this?”

“Be like what? Ready and willing to please you?” she was clutching her throat, gasping for air between words.

He had never liked when she was sarcastic, he grabbed her face with his hand, “Don’t fuck with me,” and kneed her in the stomach, throwing her on the ground.

She couldn’t help but let out a grunt, at that. She might be mentally fine with his abuse, but he was still fully capable of hurting her.

He flipped her over and straddled her, making sure she stayed on the ground, not that she was going to try to get up, and he went to town on her face with his fists.

Between blows she would manage to get out, “‘Do your worst, inferior one,’” this threw him off, so he hesitated on his next punch, which gave her the opportunity to take advantage of him. She tucked her leg under his bent knee and flipped him over, pinned his arms to the ground, and started pressing her forearm into his neck ever so slightly before getting really close to his face and saying, “Take a good look at your handiwork, Devon. Enjoy it while you can because you will never see me again,” her entire face was bloody and swollen. She knew he loved to look at the damage he had done to her, knowing it made her beautiful face unsightly, making people turn away from her on the street when her favorite thing was human connection. This was how he took her down. Or so he thought.

“Listen to me right now. Nobody. Will ever know you did this to me. The FBI will never know you did this to me. I’m not going to report you. I’m not going to have you arrested. I’m not going to tell a single soul how this happened. Not. Even. Spencer.” she knew that would set him off. He wanted to hate Spencer for ruining his relationship, for being smarter, for being everything he could never be. He was stuck in a state of delusion, thinking everything was fine before Spencer came along. He thought leaving his marks on her let Spencer know she was his and she belonged to him, not some nerd at her job. Little did he know she had never let anybody know the marks were from him because nobody knew about him to begin with. They knew she took boxing courses at the bureau, which they all knew could get ugly, but were worth it for the experience and pay off. Any marks they saw on her were easily explained away by that.

“You are going to give me your key. You are going to walk out of here before me. We. Are. Done. Do you understand me?” he didn’t respond because of the lack of oxygen getting to his brain, “Do you understand me?” she said it much louder, then, and he nodded as best he could.

“Take your key off of your belt.”

She let go of his left arm and he slid it down to his belt loop where he’d had his keys on a carabiner. He unclipped it and tossed it across the room.

After that, she climbed off of him, went to the keys, found the one he’d had to the place, and took it off. Triple checking he hadn’t made a copy. He was too stupid to hide one anywhere and she was too smart to leave one hidden in case of an emergency for him to know about.

He couldn’t even go after her to give her a piece of his mind because he was too busy regaining full consciousness while she was dealing with the keys. When she was finished, she walked back over to him, grabbed his shirt in her fist, and pulled him into a standing position. She didn’t say anything to him as she opened the door and shoved him outside. She locked all three locks before walking back into her bathroom to check the damage he’d done.

This was probably the worst he’d ever done to her. Her lips were busted, her gums were bleeding, her eyes were bloodshot, her cheeks were bruised. She had cuts all over her face, her ribs were bruised, and there were ten faint lines burned into her neck from where his hands had been.

She looked herself in the eye and smiled. She started crying to herself. She’d never been more proud of something she had done, including make Roy proud. She was honored to be in this body and in this mind and make it out alive of what she’d just done.

She cleaned herself up, put on some makeup, and a few butterfly bandages.

She examined herself and determined the way she looked now would pass as “a few cuts and bruises from Luke at the training facility.”

Then, she remembered she promised Spencer to call him if she needed anything (it was not lost on her that she also promised him that she would be safe, and although she just got the pulp beaten out of her, she was safe the entire time).

While she was leaving her apartment, she’d called Spencer.

He picked up the phone with his typical sass, “Did you even sleep?”

“No. Did you?”

“Nope.”

“I told you to get some sleep!”

“I never promised that I would.”

“Touche. I made a promise, though, and that was to call you if I needed anything…”

“Coci?”

“You’re already there aren’t you?”

“You think just because it’s four in the morning on a Sunday I’d forget about my Claudia’s coffee? Who do you think I am? Some sort of criminal?”

She deliberately ignored how casually he called her his Claudia.

“No, somebody else did that already.”

“Ouch.”

“Sorry. Too soon?”

“You can make it up to me by returning the favor.”

“On it, bud. Over and out.”

By the time she hung up, she’d gotten into her car, and made her way to The Grounds.

__________________________________________

Claudia had been walking into the front entrance of the BAU’s building when she noticed Spencer was the person a few feet in front of her.

“Hey! Sugar with coffee!” she shouted to get his attention.

He’d just finished swiping his card, so he opened the door and held it for her (which was strictly against policy, but it was Claudia).

“Coffee with nothing,” they exchanged cups as she walked through the door, “my god they did a number on you didn’t they?” he’d begun to inspect her face, seeing all of the cuts she’d bandaged. She looked at him, confused as to what he was talking about, then he saw where his eyes were going as he inspected her face, and remembered.

“Oh. Yeah,” before she could say anymore, she remembered she promised not to lie to him anymore. Her admission was honest enough. She never promised to not withhold information.

He had a subtle hint of concern in his eyes that he normally didn’t have when he noticed her cuts and bruises she got from the training facility. He felt like something was off about these, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. He knew she wasn’t lying, but something was off about how she avoided eye contact with him after he’d said something.

Then he remembered the facility didn’t have classes on Sunday, and when she’d left his apartment only hours before, she didn’t look like that.

He was just about to pry more information out of her, when they ran into JJ, coming from the opposite direction.

“Anybody else feel like they’re sleepwalking?”

“Tell me about it, I didn’t sleep at all, literally,” Claudia chuckled.

“Me neither, Henry has had food poisoning, and my mother was staying with us, talk about having your hands full.”

The elevator dinged. Claudia and JJ stepped into the elevator, while Spencer stayed put, stuck in a daze.

“Spence?”

“Earth to Spencer?”

He snapped back into reality and forced his thoughts of what Claudia was keeping from him back down his throat and into the confines of his reminders for later.

“Sorry, need to drink this coffee faster I guess,” he tried at a joke, but they could both see something else turning the gears of that big brain of his.

Claudia knew it had something to do with her, judging by his previous reaction, and considering she didn’t exactly want to talk about it in front of JJ, she stayed silent.

JJ, however, had other plans, “Are you okay? You look a little…”

Before she could finish, he blinked and shook his head like a dog after a bath, “Yeah, yeah, I’m just tired,” to really seal the deal, he let out a huge yawn, which made Claudia and JJ follow suit.

Mid-yawn, breaking the tension between her and Spencer, Claudia said, “My god, don’t do that.”

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t help it,” he picked up that that was her way of acknowledging she knew that he knew she was hiding something from him, so he calmed down a bit too. By the time he said that, they’d reached the sixth floor, only to be met by the rest of the team heading into the elevator.

“No time to brief you three. Wheels up now.”

__________________________________________

The plane ride was lackluster, the case is straightforward, but still unable to be solved, for now. This unsub is particularly frantic and unpredictable with his timing, but his MO suggests he was abandoned by his father and looking for surrogates now. Nothing they hadn’t seen before.

After a long flight to Seattle and the drive to this small town thirty miles outside of it, Hotch demanded everyone get some sleep in order to crack down on this guy the next day.

The small town hospitality was not unrecognized. Everybody knew everybody, so when the local police needed to house FBI agents who were trying to catch the man killing well-respected people of the community, loads of folks opened their doors, including a local inn.

Owned and operated by a retired couple in their seventies, it had surprisingly good business, which, unfortunately for the team, meant they had to bunk.

“Lucky for us they still have three rooms available,” Hotch said.

“Lucky? Hotch, have you noticed there are six of us?” Morgan was always the first to despise the idea of bunking with anybody.

“Yes, I have, which is why we’re lucky they still have three rooms and not two.”

“Well, JJ, let’s get a move-on,” Emily had already grabbed her go-bag and took a key from Hotch without a second thought.

“Well, I am absolutely not rooming with Reid,” Morgan had always had a strict “no Spencer” clause when it came to situations like this.

“Guess it’s you and me then,” Hotch had responded to Derek, until he realized who that left, “oh…”

Neither Spencer, nor Claudia, had realized this either until the moment came. Claudia had stopped scrolling on her phone and Spencer had stopped perusing the lobby, waiting for his room assignment, but they heard Hotch’s exclamation.

They both looked at Hotch, then at each other, the back at Hotch before saying, at the exact same time:

“It’s totally fine, we’re friends.”

“There’ll be a male and female pair no matter what we do.”

They looked back at each other one last time before Hotch said, “Okay. As long as you’re both okay with this arrangement, I won’t bother anybody over it.”

He threw Claudia the key before leading Morgan up the stairs to their room. Hotch muttered something to Derek that made him yell with laughter. Spencer and Claudia could only imagine what that was about.

As if on cue, the two looked at each other at the exact same time and started giggling like children who had caught their parents doing something silly.

“Come on,” Claudia said through her fit of laughter.

As she walked ahead of him, Spencer’s mind wandered back to the cuts on her face. He’d thought she’d had more makeup on today than usual. Not that he often paid attention to how little or how much makeup she wore (she rarely wore more than the bare minimum, but he only knew that because she wore a bit less than JJ, Emily, and Garcia). He thought it was strange that she not only procured multiple cuts, but had also been wearing a turtleneck in August. Not the most absurd thing to see, but definitely not ordinary. He wondered if she packed more to continue hiding.

They walked to the room in a comfortable silence, but there was still something lingering between them, and they both knew what it was.

Claudia arrived at the door and unlocked it, making her way inside to, thankfully, see two beds. She had read enough romance novels to know sharing a room with your best friend by chance usually leads things in a crazy direction she did not want to go into tonight (or ever, for that matter, she shoved that thought deep, deep down). She had also had enough sense in her to know that things like that don’t happen in real life.

“Which bed do you want?” Spencer knocked her out of her train of thought.

“Oh, uh,” she wanted to lie and say it didn’t matter, but it did, so she sucked it up and told herself that it’s just Spencer. She could tell him everything, no matter how silly or mundane it seemed.

“Could I have the one next to the air conditioner?”

“Absolutely,” Spencer stood in between the beds and threw his stuff on the one farther away from the ac, so that he could bow to her bed and say, “your throne awaits, my Queen,” in a truly terrible impression of one of the characters from the cartoon portion of Mary Poppins, but it made her laugh, nonetheless.

He started laughing with her, and while she tried to breathe through her laughs she asked, “What on god’s good earth was that!”

“I have no idea, I’m so tired,” he was still laughing, too, “but I did want to…diffuse some tension,” he calmed down to look her in her eyes, pleading for her to finish telling him the truth about what happened to her.

When she just stared back at him, he continued, “Claudia, there is no training at the facility on Sunday. You didn’t get those from Luke.”

She looked away from him, then. She felt her eyes start to burn, but she refused to crack in front of him.

“No. I didn’t.”

“Then where did you get them from,” Spencer was being very gentle with his delivery, which she appreciated.

After a moment’s silence, weighing her options, she said, “Spencer. I will tell you,” she took in a shaky breath, “if you promise not to tell anyone.”

“I promise.”

“I mean it.”

“So do I,” at that, he held up his pinky for her to take. They’d had a discussion a while ago where they both thought keeping a pinky promise was above the law, space, and time, and they meant it, wholeheartedly. She looked between his eyes and his hand and took his pinky in hers. He brought his hand to his lips and kissed his thumb. He pushed their hands towards her and she did the same.

Neither of them tried to let go by the time she started talking, so they both held on tighter.

“Uh…so…like I already told you, I had been trying to keep parts of myself a secret,” she looked into his eyes to be sure he was listening (and also to seek solace). He nodded.

“Well, one of the biggest was that I…kind of…maybe…had a boyfriend…the whole time…” Spencer’s eyes went wide with shock and his brow furrowed at this admission. Of all the things he’s seen through, he never would’ve guessed that.

“You- what?”

He wasn’t mad, he was genuinely surprised.

“Emphasis on the word ‘had,’” she rolled her eyes, “as of this morning.”

Spencer realized where this was going and he felt his chest and jaw clench, his eyes burn, and his blood pulsing everywhere.

Claudia noticed those physical changes and she couldn’t help but look at him like he was a lost puppy. Seeing him like this hurt her more than anything Devon had ever done to her.

She wrapped her hand around his wrist that was holding her pinky, “I don’t want to make you upset-“

He cut her off, “Nothing you are doing is making me upset, I promise. Keep going.”

At that, Claudia sat down on the bed Spencer had claimed as his, and she pulled him down to sit next to her. She didn’t think she could look into those doe eyes of his any longer without completely breaking down, especially while saying what she was about to say.

“I started dating him halfway through the first year of my doctorate. I went to all of these concerts with my friends from my undergrad program and he was always there too. I thought he was cool. My friends who were friends with his friends thought he was cool. We kissed a few times, went on some dates, and started seeing each other. He supported me through half of my time at Penn; he made sure I ate between teaching courses and having sessions with my clients. He made sure I slept enough when I got back from investigations with the CSI, even if it meant canceling some of my classes, my students always understood. After we moved in together, something…switched in him. He started drinking, he stopped going to work, he started avoiding me. One day, after weeks of me being absent and juggling everything all at once, I came home and he was angry. A kind of angry I had never seen before from anybody. He…threw his nearly-full bottle of beer at the door I had walked through. It barely missed my head. When it did, he ran me into the wall and started choking me. My head hit the wall so hard, I nearly fainted. When I didn’t faint, he punched me. Then I blacked out…”

“Did he-“ she knew what Spencer was alluding to, and didn’t want him to finish his sentence.

“No. No. He never did that,” there were times, however, that she had felt the same amount of passion was not reciprocated. But she didn’t want to tell him that. That had nothing to do with this.

“I woke up on the floor, confused. I figured it was a fit of drunken rage, so I decided not to think too hard about it. That is, until, it kept happening,” Spencer felt like his muscles and his bones were going to rip out of his skin. His leg was bouncing up and down and his hands had started to shake from keeping all of this rage inside of him. Claudia noticed, but if she didn’t keep talking, she’d never finish. She needed this to end just as badly as him, and if she didn’t tell him everything, he would know.

“That was my life for a year. It only happened when he was drunk, but it got worse. After the second time, the time I knew it was all intentional, I started taking self-defense and boxing classes and I promised myself I would leave him, but I didn’t know how. I couldn’t live by myself. I didn’t want to tell anybody this was happening, especially not-“ she felt a lump in her throat. She didn’t know if she should or could tell Spencer about Roy. Her eyes were wet now, but she was stubborn as all hell, and refused to cry in front of him about something as stupid as Devon. Roy, on the other hand, she could cry about Roy any time of day, and she wasn’t even a crier, but she didn’t think it was fair to dump all of that onto Spencer when she was already telling him all of this.

“Especially not who?” she hadn’t realized she zoned out while weighing her options. Now he would definitely know she was keeping something from him. Honesty, it is then.

“Somebody I…I can’t tell you about, right now, or ever, maybe, but…” she didn’t know how to justify her reasoning for that besides the fact that she had made a bigger promise to Roy to try not to dwell on him. Or talk about him. Thanks for the impossible task, jackass.

“It’s okay. Keep going,” Spencer was being so nice to her, she felt like she would shatter into a million pieces with how fragile she felt.

She told him about her study she’d conducted on him. Spencer recognized it as a part of her dissertation she had written. This whole time, his favorite part of her dissertation, a part that felt so clinical, so real, so calculated, and so emotional wasn’t about a willing client of Claudia’s. It was about Claudia herself. He felt like he was going to be sick.

She didn’t notice, so she kept going. She began to ramble because she realized that would be the only way to get all of this out. She told him about how their conversation led her to finally make the decision to enact this ridiculous plan of hers.

“Wait,” broken from his trance, Spencer spoke up, “I caused this?”

“What? Spencer, no, absolutely not. I need you to understand that I could’ve fought back. I could’ve taken him down. I could’ve done to him what he did to me tenfold. I chose to let him do so much. It was a…selfish, psychological manipulation,” she suddenly felt horrible admitting that’s what she’d done. She felt as low as him now, “Which I realize was stupid and immature, but…I wanted him to think he was safe. I wanted him to think this was business as usual. And then I wanted to rip the rug out from under him. Crush his hopes of thinking he ever had control. From the second time he’d done this, the control was in my hands. You know, he thought everyone knew he did this to me? He took pride in it, but he never knew I covered them. He never knew you all knew I took boxing at the facility. He never knew none of you knew about him, until I told him this morning. The look behind his eyes was priceless. I wish I could’ve captured it on film. He looked so…defeated.”

She’d developed a death grip on Spencer’s wrist and instantly let go. She felt like something was breaking inside of her. She didn’t feel like herself. She was an aggressive person. She was a loud person. Hell, she was even violent, when it came to a punching bag, but the way she psychologically tortured Devon with one sentence felt like she betrayed every good thing she had ever done in the name of justice.

She got up from the bed, then, and started pacing, “I’m so sorry.”

“Sorry? For what?”

“I don’t know, everything? Holding your wrist too tight, telling you all of that, god, you probably think I’m insane now. You probably think I’m an absolute psycho who gets pleasure out of making people feel small, oh my god, I shouldn’t have said anything, I’m so sorry, Spencer, I ruined everything, please please please don’t hate me, please don’t tell me I ruined everything. Oh my god I don’t think I can handle losing you, too, right now,” she had begun to shake and hyperventilate. Spencer almost couldn’t take the sight of her like this. He never wanted to see her in pain.

“Hey,” he touched her shoulder, and guided her to sit back down, “it’s okay. You’re okay. We are okay,” he had moved his hand from her shoulder to her upper back, slowly rubbing random patterns across it.

“Can you…can you please stop that?” Claudia had never found someone rubbing her back to be soothing in the case of a panic attack, she found it actually made her feel more suffocated, but she knew Spencer didn’t know that, so she tried to ask in the nicest way possible, given the circumstances.

“Of course,” Spencer instantly stopped and removed his hand, “is there anything else you’d like me to do instead?” He was using that godforsaken whisper of his that made him seem so damn kind and understanding. She heard him use it with children multiple times out in the field, but she never thought he’d be using it on her. The tears might start falling, now, she thought.

“I don’t…I don’t know, could you…could you hold my hand really tight, please?”

She still couldn’t get a hold of her breathing. Her eyes were sealed shut and she was rubbing her hands over her pants; she felt the need to be in constant motion to remind herself that she was still alive.

“Yes,” he grabbed her right hand in both of his and gripped as hard as he thought was necessary without hurting her.

“Could you…could you squeeze harder,” she needed to feel like her circulation was about to be cut off in order for it to work.

“Harder? Are you-“

“Yes, I’m sure.”

He squeezed harder until it hurt him to keep going, and he kept that pressure there until she told him to stop. While he was gripping her hand, her breathing slowed, and her left hand had stopped rubbing her leg. Her grip on him hadn’t lessened, though, so he didn’t let go of that.

Her eyes were still shut, but she said, “I’m sorry if I scared you.”

“Claudia, you didn’t scare me by having a panic attack.”

“But I did scare you?”

“No, you didn’t scare me at all, for any reason, I promise,” it baffled him that she thought that would’ve scared him. If anything, it made him admire her more now that she was comfortable enough to let him see this side of her. Granted, you don’t choose when a panic attack happens, but she could’ve left the room if she wanted to. He knew that.

“You can loosen your hand now,” she was careful not to say ‘let go,’ because she didn’t want him to let go.

He did, but his grip was still firm, tethering her to this moment, to him, to the bed they sat on.

“Do you want some water?”

“Please.”

There were complimentary waters in the room, but they weren’t cold, and he knew she would’ve preferred it to be ice cold freezing. She sensed that’s what he was thinking about when he hesitated to bring it over to her.

“Any water, please, Spencer.”

“Sorry,” he handed her the bottle and she chugged almost the whole thing in one go. She loved the way gulping felt in her throat. It made her feel full after feeling so empty, like all of the life had been sucked out of her.

They stayed silent for a moment while she finished the last of the water, until she finally took a breath and spoke up.

“Okay. Spencer,” she stood across from him and looked him in the eyes; her normal ‘business-as-usual’ self coming back like a charm, “I am going to shower. In that shower, I am going to wash my face. Washing my face means the makeup is going to come off. The makeup covering the worst of the gory details. Do you understand me?”

He nodded.

“When I get out, I would prefer it if you were wrapped up in something else. After the fiasco that just happened, my god, I do not want you to see…this,” she gestured to her entire neck and face, “please be preoccupied. I am begging you.”

He was hesitant to agree. He had a conflict going on inside of him. On one hand, he wanted to see what that bastard really did to her, what extent he went to. On the other…he didn’t want to see her torn apart and beaten with such scrutiny. He didn’t want to see any of it. He wanted to see all of it.

“Okay. I’ll just go to bed. If you need me, wake me up. I won’t mind.”

“Okay,” and with that, she went into the bathroom.

It was probably the best and the worst shower of her entire life. The best because the shower after a panic attack is always incredible and the worst because the shower after a panic attack is always like coming down after a high.

That is, literally, what it is, in a way. She had shattered in that bedroom and Spencer, dear as he was, picked up the pieces, but she had to mend herself.

The tears never fell, they usually don’t. She let the warmth (some might even say scalding hot heat) engulf her. She had to feel like she was in a sauna and a hot spring simultaneously to have the prime shower experience, panic attack notwithstanding, this was a daily need. She let it run over her face, clearing her mind of the headache she felt coming on. She breathed some more and she rubbed her face before finally scrubbing the awful events of that morning off of her. Normally, she showered quickly, but after that she needed to take her time with herself. Instead of quickly going through the motions, she made sure every strand of hair was coated in shampoo and every inch of her body was lathered in body wash and given the same love and care at the end as she gave herself at the beginning. She kept her eyes closed. She kept breathing. Trying to think about nothing. She had a passing thought of Roy and how he used to bathe her when she was little and how she’d come home extremely intoxicated at six in the morning on a day during her undergrad program and he washed her face for her. She remembered, she smiled, she let it go. She took a few more deep breaths and finally got out of the shower. She felt so good, so clean, so calm, so peaceful. And then she saw her face again.

It had gotten worse, as bruises usually do. The cuts were healing fine, thanks to the butterfly bandages, but the bruises. Her cheek and eye were swollen where he’d socked her twice with his ring. Oh well. There was nothing to be done about it besides wait. She took an anti-inflammatory for the swelling, her insomnia medication, brushed her teeth, and turned the light off before exiting the bathroom.

Her bed was closer to the bathroom, thank god. She turned down the covers to get into bed when she heard Spencer rustle and she froze.

He heard her stop moving, so he felt the need to reassure her, “I was just putting my book on the table, I’m not facing your direction.”

“Oh. Okay…” she continued getting into the bed, making sure to face away from him.

They both settled into bed. Him staring at the ceiling, her putting her headphones in (dangerous, she knew that, but even with her medication, she couldn’t sleep without noise), but before she started the music, she had one last thing to say.

“Spencer,” she whispered.

“Claudia.”

“Thank you.”

He didn’t need any clarification. In fact, he didn’t even need a thank you, he felt it was an honor and a privilege to help someone so steadfast and sure of themselves. She trusted him to see her like that. He felt like he should be thanking her, but instead, he settled for:

“You would’ve done the same for me.”

[cinnamonest]

Do you ever plan on writing for kazuha and his snake girl cuz that pair literally stole my heart😞

YES omg I love her, our danger noodle, our nope rope, scaled and slithery babygirl

EDIT: forgot to include the link! This is a follow-up to Kazuha's entry in [this post]

-------

You don't run away.

Eventually, Kazuha felt guilty enough to finally summon the strength to do what he viewed as the right thing — let you out of the cage he had you in, give you the opportunity to walk away and go back into the wilderness. It'll hurt his heart, but he knows you'll most likely run, it's just your nature...

But you don't. You scurry out of the cage, sure, but you don't go running off. You instead shuffle over to him, wrapping your arms around him for comfort... and even after some more time passes, you still stay. And when he starts to walk, you follow. Your face seems nervous and uneasy, but you have no intentions of leaving his side.

It feels good, of course, it's a huge relief and it warms him heart... at the same time, though, he's basically made a wild creature dependent on him, and isn't that usually considered... bad? After all, if someone took an actual, normal wild animal out of nature to be a pet, people would find it distasteful, inhumane, cruel even. They'd say something about how such a creature should be home in the wild where it belongs, how it wasn't made to be kept like this.

And technically, a lot of nations have legislation against taking hybrids out of the wild if they're certain species... so he's probably violating ethics and the law. That's... well, any negative feelings he has on the matter are overridden when you bump your head against him affectionately.

No, those thoughts he was having before are wrong. You want to be with him. He saved you. You're happy. So why should he feel bad? He's doing a good thing.

From that point forward, at least he can rid himself of the guilt of feeling like he was forcing you to be with him, so, nothing left to do at that point but continue on his journey as usual, now with you in tow. He can't cover as much ground as he used to per day, as you walk a bit slower and get tired rather quickly, but... well, that's okay. You're worth it.

There's a few glaring issues with bringing you into any public space, though. For starters, inability to speak, and lack of understanding of certain conventions of normalcy that might cause you to draw attention to yourself. Moreover, now that he's thought over the legal complications, as there's hefty penalties for taking certain creatures out of the wild, he realizes he can't just go get those venom glands removed, he'd be reported, and worst of all, you'd be taken away. He'll have to just take you around where he goes and hope for the best.

But even if he can keep you under control, and make it appear that you're just quiet and shy, there's one other issue that's not dangerous or drastic, very simple and harmless in fact, but a dead giveaway nonetheless: several times per minute, your long, thin, forked tongue flickers out of your mouth. You do it in your sleep even, he would know, he's been woken up by it hitting his face before. It's only for a split second, and if it were only once, it might go unnoticed, but you do it frequently enough that someone would surely notice it very quickly. Also, there's the possibility of you yawning or otherwise opening your mouth wide while surrounded by people, and those fangs would absolutely draw immediate attention.

While he managed to get you to wear a simple cloak, getting your mouth covered is much more of a struggle. He tried a few different means of covering your mouth, letting you wear his scarf and wrapping it over the lower part of your face to see if you'd let it stay... but sure enough, after a moment, you stretched your neck and shook your head a bit to make the fabric fall down onto your collarbones, and immediately proceeded to flick your tongue out into the air. He tried buying one of those masks that covers the lower face and has straps behind each ear, but it seemed to put you in panic as you whimpered and tugged at it, and he couldn't bring himself to put you through any distress.

There was already even one time you two encountered travelers on the road, and it actually seemed to be going very well — he explained your silence with a she's not used to strangers, sorry — right up until you took a few steps towards the other human and, without hesitation, flicked your flat, forked tongue out onto their skin, to better identify the strange creature.

Ah, um, sorry, that's — it's a cultural thing, and, and ah, a-anyway, sorry, we'll be going now—

For whatever reason, your human seemed to be in a hurry to leave that interaction, grabbing you by the wrist and pulling you away.

So, he's at an impasse when it comes to how to take care of his traveling needs -- he usually goes into towns every few days or so to get necessities to last until he reaches the next town. He can't just tell you to be quiet and not do anything; you may understand some basic words now, but not nearly enough to communicate complex commands.

In the end, he has to just find a secluded spot, break out and construct the collapsible cage, and leave you in it for a short time. It's very risky, and he knows that, so he's always rushing to get only the absolute bare necessities before hurrying back. He doesn't want to leave you just tied to a post or something again, that could leave you in danger if a predator found you, whereas at least a cage provides a barrier.

The first few times, you flailed and whined. He feels awful, really. I know, I know... I'm really sorry... I'll be back soon, I promise... it's okay... he buys bigger quantities so he won't need to go into town as often, tries to hunt more food, but still, he can't just live off the wilderness indefinitely.

After a while, you start to get nervous every time you come near a human town, you whimper and cling to him as if begging not to be put in the cage... it hurts his heart, too much to bear. So he has no choice — he drags you through the town, keeping you very very close with a very tight grip. You look nervous, but wildly curious, turning your head all different directions. But thankfully, the anxiety you appear to have does mean you don't leave his side. You do still curiously lean over and taste — or, wait, isn't it technically smell...? Taste and smell? Is it both at the same time? — various humans and objects with your tongue. Thankfully it doesn't get too noticed, and he just talks his way out of it — from a shelter, yes, she can't talk... what breed? Ah, well that's... the pet kind...?

Needless to say, he tries to get in and out very fast, and preferably have to speak to as few people as possible. So far there have been no major incidents, save for that one time he let go of your wrist just for a split second to grab something, turned around and panicked when you were gone, only to find you a few yards away at a produce market, looming with wide eyes over a pen full of bird eggs... thankfully he was there in an instant to grab you, lest the otherwise inevitable have happened.

On your travels, though, you actually adjust alright. At first, you were so sniffly and scared when he took you away, but it's soon overridden by awe and wonder and curiosity of the world around you, and adjusting to the places you go. Which he does have to be careful about -- obviously, northern regions are no longer an option for travel without some sort of precaution, you'd freeze fast.

Before, you were in your ideal climate and habitat, but he quickly learns through your travels that you're incredibly sensitive to changes in temperature and humidity. When you're in hot environments, though, you like to lay out in the sun.

One time when you were traversing some desert, he woke up one day to immediate panic at your absence, and ran out of the cave you'd been in, only to find you right outside the entrance, sprawled out on a rock with a content smile, basking in the sun, occasionally turning yourself over like a rotisserie to get sunlight on all your scale patches. Limbs sprawled out, presumably not instinctively knowing what else to do with them, given being half-brained of a creature with no appendages to speak of. You open your eyes and turning your head when he calls out that one word you've gotten used to.

Yes, you do, as of now, respond to that one word he says whenever addressing you, after some conditioning. It just came to him one day, very simple and short, as well as generic and common, and admittedly uncreative. He decided a one-syllable name would be easiest for you to recognize. It's more of a "cute pet name" that you would give an animal but not an actual human, but it's not like you understand what it means. Regardless, if he says it, you perk up and come over to him, so you seem to understand the word's intention and purpose.

But back to regarding the climate, he has to watch out for you at night, and be mindful of the temperature changes that occur in some regions. You're visibly miserable in the cold, start shivering and whimpering even in merely cool temperatures, and gradually become lethargic and unmoving.

The bigger problem is that warm blankets and clothes don't help. As a cold-blooded animal, your body doesn't exude heat, whereas for a human, blankets and clothes trap in the heat that the body creates. For you, clothes and blankets can serve as a barrier from cold winds, but not much else. This does not combine well with the fact that you'll freeze much faster than a person would.

Instead, you require an external heat source, namely fires and his own body that, unlike yours, radiates heat. You do cling to him at night, curling up to his body's warmth... and he doesn't mind that at all. You're not so timid of the fire anymore either. He's even gotten you used to cooked people food, and not... you know, having to watch you butcher poor mice and rabbits and swallow them whole in a rather horrifying dislocation of your jawbone. He tries to block that imagery out of his memory.

...About that, though.

Perhaps in part wanting to get a better grasp on exactly what your venom does, as well as a general curiosity to learn more about you, Kazuha finds himself seeking additional information on your kind.

He manages to scrape enough money together to visit a large bookstore in the continental mainland, scouring around and narrowing down sections to find what he's looking for (all while keeping an eye on you, of course, who is bumbling around the bookshelves with a blank stare)... nonfiction... encyclopedias... science... zoology... there. Index of Teyvat Reptiles. Should be worth the payment, hopefully.

Later that day, once you're back outside, he spends an entire evening sorting through the pages. Table of Contents... Snakes... Land Snakes... by region...

It's split into a page-by-page section where each entry makes note of the species itself as well as characteristics of hybrids for that species.

With each page, he takes a over to you — sitting beside him, staring at the book with eyes wide with curiosity yet blank with complete lack of understanding — and compares it to the illustration for that species.

No, the color of those faint patches of scales on your neck and shoulders doesn't match... no, that one has yellow eyes with pupils, not solid eyes like yours... no, that one is a constrictor...

And then there's one entry towards the very back. The scale color matches your scales and hair. The eyes are like yours. The habitat range shown on the map is very small, but it's the exact place where he found you. It's a short entry without much detail, and it's listed as endangered. There's a brief description and a bullet-point "fun facts" section under the name.

It's actually very endearing, at first. It describes your behavior very accurately, the illustration aligns with what he can tell about you. It's nice to know exactly what you are.

On your end, you're not sure what about this rectangle is so fascinating to the human, but he's been staring at it and moving the little flap pieces for some time now. There's pretty pictures, so it does pique your interest, although you're quickly getting very tired as the sun sets further.

There's a lot of little markings on the paper, which humans use for information, you know that, seeing as your human has on multiple occasions stopped to look at those wooden signs at forks in the road that have similar markings. He seems focused on it, whatever it may be...

For whatever reason, though, he suddenly seems to get a bit stiff, his shoulders tense up. You turn your gaze over to his face, still with that soft smile he always has, but it starts to twitch as his eyes get wider. And wider. And he tenses more. And more. With each movement of his eyes. Must be interesting.

...

Currently holds the title of deadliest reptile known to science. If spotted in residential areas, report to law enforcement or animal control immediately and vacate surrounding premises within one mile; non-professionals should not attempt to approach, kill, or capture. Venom injection to death time for an average adult male is around 10 to 12 seconds.

Fun fact! While these snakes usually hunt small prey, one bite is capable of killing a Sumpter beast.

As soon as his eyes finish reading the last sentence, he turns his head as he feels you shift — your mouth slowly opens into a wide, prolonged yawn, the muscular flex of the action pulling back your upper lip and exposing your long, curved fangs. You make a soft, tired sound when your mouth closes, shuffling closer to him and resting your chin on his shoulder, closing your eyes and letting yourself drift into a half-sleep state, mouth slack-jawed as you breathe onto his neck.

...But your human is twitching. He's tense, stiff. You can feel it, it's only slight, but noticeable nonetheless. This strikes you as odd — usually you're the one that shakes and shivers and trembles whenever the temperature drops to anything below warm, and you don't feel cold at all right now, given you're in a region that's warm even at night. Still, you feel an urge to help fix whatever is wrong.

He flinches a bit when you move. You lift your head up, looking into his eyes and make a soft, concerned sound. But then, you stand and take a few paces over to where all his things are set down, leaning down to rummage for a moment. Before he can follow you or call out to you, you turn back around, blanket in hand, and hurriedly make your way back over. You pull the corners of the blanket open wide and lower yourself back down, lifting and moving one foot so that you stand with one foot on each side of where he sits, and come to rest on his lap, straddling his waist, and pull the blanket back together behind him.

It takes a moment to register, but it clicks. You're doing the same thing he does for you when you're cold. Getting the blanket and holding you close to him. You even outstretch your arms and wrap them around his shoulders, rest your head on his shoulder again.

After a few moments, you pull back, looking at him and making a soft inquisitive sound, as if to check to confirm your efforts of comfort have succeeded.

And he smiles — a twitching smile, but nonetheless assuring. He raises a hand — a shaky, quivering hand — and pats the top of your head.

You soon fall asleep as usual, although he seems to stay awake for some time, more tense than usual. The tension lasts a few days — he tenses up more, flinches at touches, stiffens and swallows heavily and shudders at your touch sometimes, especially when you nuzzle your face against his neck. His hands always curl up into fists so tight they tremble.

But he never pushes you away. Never rejects how you lay your head on his lap, or on his shoulder. Sometimes his breathing gets very heavy when you move in certain ways, but he never rejects your presence. He doesn't quietly leave and run far away while you sleep, like you've sometimes feared. He stays right by your side. Day in, day out.

It's because of that, that he's right there by your side at a critical moment.

He's been mugged before, admittedly. A lot of bandits stake out rural roads, waiting for travelers to pass by that they can rob. In the past, though, he's been alone, and was easily able to blow them away and escape.

But as you pass through the desert, he can tell something is wrong. There's that sense of unease, like being watched. Could be a bandit, but also could be an animal or something... He's very on-guard, looking around, hand gripping his sword handle so it can be unsheathed within a second if needed.

There's a sound — but when he turns his head, it's just some of those desert foxes rummaging through a bush. He sighs, momentary spike in heart rate going down.

And then, you cry out, a sound of panic and distress.

And when he turns his head back, there's a man that has you in a hold from behind, arm around your chest, knife hovering above your neck. Your hands pull at his to no avail, your eyes are wide and quickly watering. You make high-pitched squealing sounds.

Give me everything you got on you. Don't try anything.

A-ah, yes, hang on. I'll get it, just... just don't...

His hands tremble, but he fetches the mora he has on him within an instant... and you, you don't grasp the nonverbal message to stay still the way a human would, you're thrashing and your feet are kicking and the man says in a gruff voice to hold still, you dumb bi—

But his words cut off.

Kazuha only hears it, as his eyes are focused on his hands pulling the coin pouch out of his pockets, but when it falls to silence, he freezes, slowly turning his head upward.

There's a moment of silence in which all present parties are frozen stiff, expressions ranging from the man's bewildered expression and your human's in wide-eyed shock — but you can't see either, both from how you've turned your head to the side, as well as how your own eyes are squeezed shut from the force of your jaw chomping down on the man's jugular.

A few more seconds pass. There's a dull thud when the knife hits the sand, and, after a moment, your own startled cry as you go down, the man's weight collapsing on top of you, sending you falling forward face-down onto the sand.

The bandit's body is heavy on top of yours, your body flat on your stomach. You wriggle and writhe, digging your elbows and clawing your fingers into the sand in an effort to crawl out from underneath it, but the composition of the sand means both actions merely cause your arms to sink into and flail in the sand that gives way to any pressure.

You turn your head up, sniffling with tears running down your face as you whimper pitifully.

Ka...Ka-thu-haa....

Your human is standing there, frozen and wide-eyed, but hearing your voice seems to make him snap out of the momentary stunned stupor.

He doesn't hesitate to hurry over to you. Drops down to his knees, pulls you out from underneath the body... gives said body a firm nudge with his foot that sends it tumbling down an incline of sand, obscuring it from immediate view from the road. You sniffle and wrap your arms and legs around him.

He's tense again. He's stiff, there's a slight tremble in his hands... but still, he doesn't move away. He keeps stroking your back up and down in a soothing motion, saying soft-spoken words you don't understand but can tell are meant to comfort you. He holds you there until you can walk again, and spends the whole night fretting over you, seemingly upset when you have a bruise from the incident.

From then on, you're very afraid of any human other than your own. They're scary creatures.

When you run into any on the road, you immediately cower behind him, grab onto him and squeeze your eyes shut, making soft distress noises. And when he drags you into towns — which you now protest, often whimpering all the while — you cling to him. He realizes you're looking to him to protect you, as if he's the deadlier force between you two, which you, for some reason, seem to believe to be the case.

As for you, in your mind, he is all that stands between you and certain death from a predatory human that would otherwise certainly get you and eat you if not for him. You've only killed rabbits and other rodents before, you don't think you could kill a human by yourself. You presume your human played a role in taking care of the bad human, probably stabbed him with the sword when you had your eyes shut. And he saved you from being crushed by the body, too. You would surely perish without his protection.

This is especially true as, you are now beginning to realize, humans are incredibly violent and powerful entities. You never noticed it before, but now you realize almost all the humans carry weapons on them. They are predatory creatures with innate natures so violent, that they attack so viciously and randomly as you have witnessed firsthand. Being a human living among other humans must be constantly frightening, they could attack at any second and you'd be done for. You've seen lots of predators, but they have to chase and repeatedly claw at prey, they don't have the same ability to stab and slash and kill so quickly, like humans with their tools.

But thankfully, you have a good one, and you trust your human will keep you safe. He's smart and strong and can talk to the other humans.

They're very scary. Unpredictable creatures that can choose to kill at a moment's notice, in an instant. It's a good thing there are no other such creatures capable of that, at least none that you can think of.

[hibiscus-misery-pills]

“Time for yourself.”

[Gender] — Female! Reader

[Warning] — Anxiety (Mild), depression (Slight), nothing much the rest is fluff.

[Synopsis] — Reader takes time for their self since the staff refuse to let reader bed rot, and they bring along their feline friend who knows how to cheer reader up.

[Word Count] —

[Author Note] — This idea is based off the outfits I see on Pinterest, also the outfits pics aren’t mines, unfortunately I don’t know the actual person who put the fit together so shout out to them. But I’m doing my face routine and I also like makeup so, I’m throwing these ideas in one plot, also if you want a male version just let me know in the comments, enjoy the story! (Also this is Imposter AU)

[P.S] — This is the outfit that inspired me to write this fic.

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It was another day in Twisted Wonderland, and you had decided to stay in bed, just lounging with Grim snuggled by your side. The ceiling fan spun lazily overhead. However, some of the staff members, particularly Crewel and Trein, disapproved of your plan to do nothing all day. Their disapproval was clear when you heard their familiar footsteps approaching your room.

The door swung open gently with a knock, and Crewel and Trein entered. You weren’t sure how they managed to convince you to get up, but before you knew it, you were on your feet. Trein informed you, "We’ll swing by and pick you up around 5," before they left. Despite being thrust into this unfamiliar world, it wasn’t entirely unkind. Remarkably, your bookbag had arrived with you and functioned as a portal for transporting things from your world. Ramshackle had been revamped by Crowley, and while it felt more homely, it still wasn’t quite comforting. The beige wallpaper with its floral design was calming, though, and the white vanity, along with wardrobes and closets from Crewel, added a touch of familiarity.

Your belongings had made the transition as well, including your electronics. They now had infinite battery life but couldn’t connect to social media or make calls. Sitting at your vanity, you decided to do your makeup, playing your favorite music through your tablet. The window’s semi-circle area was large enough to accommodate both your vanity and desk. From your vanity, you faced the front of Ramshackle, which was visible through the semi-transparent curtains. As you dusted off baking powder with a brush, you noticed someone approaching Ramshackle through the curtains. You leaned in to get a better look and saw Vil. He appeared to be in a daze, looking up at the building.

Panicking, you hid behind the vanity mirror, grateful for its size that concealed you. Vil seemed to be assessing Ramshackle before leaving a letter and gifts in the mailbox. Your heart raced as you watched him leave slowly, taking his time. As soon as he was gone, you released a sigh of relief, tears welling up in your eyes. After finishing your makeup, you dressed in your prepped outfit and matching shoes, then added a scarf for Grim to match your look. With the scarf tied around Grim’s collar, you finished your preparations and spritzed on some perfume. Just as you were about to head out, Crewel pulled up in his sports car.

As you walked out, you noticed Leona standing nearby. You hurried into the car, jumping into the passenger seat, while Leona looked on in surprise through the rearview mirror. The rest of the day passed quickly as you spent time with Crewel and Trein. They treated you warmly and spoiled you and Grim, acknowledging the trouble their students had caused. You decided to explore a small part of town with Grim, sticking close and not straying too far.

With the allowance provided by Crowley and additional funds from Crewel, you were able to buy a few special items. Among your purchases was a limited-edition jewelry set featuring a beautiful silver chain adorned with deep blue sapphires. You also bought a matching silver satin collar with a sapphire for Grim. When you returned to Ramshackle, Crewel commented on how you seemed to enjoy your time to yourself. You couldn’t help but smile, reflecting on how peaceful and content the shopping experience had made you feel.As you lay back on your bed with your new items and purse, you felt a sense of happiness and contentment. Maybe the staffs was right—you needed to take more time for yourself.

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[Author Note] — Goddamn it, I write too much, why am Im writing like i’m writing for my teachers.😭

[skyward-floored]

Part four to the mess that is accidental domestication, Warriors and Time edition! This was really fun to write but also it’s soooooo long >_< oh well.

Warning for some nonconsensual drugging, but it’s not too bad? I don’t think it’s too bad but anyway there’s your warning.

Ao3 link

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Being separated from the group always made Warriors nervous.

Not that he’d admit it of course. But he was used to fighting and traveling alongside others, and not knowing the whereabouts of everyone except for himself and Time made him ill at ease. Especially since Time was currently slouched against his shoulder, mumbling something about bombchus and how the items were cuter than the actual creatures.

Warriors sighed, pressing a weary hand to the bridge of his nose.

Having realized they were alone after exiting a portal, him and Time had made their way to a nearby town, seeing no sign of the others while they traveled. They stopped for some info at the bar that night, hoping someone had seen a large group of young men go by recently, but had been met with no useful tips, and several people eyeing them suspiciously.

And drugged drinks.

Which Warriors has realized almost immediately after taking a sip.

But Time had gotten his drink first, spiced so heavily the flavor wasn’t noticeable, and Warriors had been trying to get information out of the bartender and wasn’t paying much attention to the other hero.

Neither of them was aware of the tasteless poison he was consuming, and Time had already drunk more than half his glass by the time Warriors sipped his own and realized what was going on. He’d quickly paid and tried to quietly drag Time outside, the older hero already swaying and cursing himself for not noticing, but their escape was noticed almost immediately.

Apparently they’d stumbled straight into a thieves town. And the residents had decided that between Time’s armor and Warriors’ scarf, the two men seemed like good pickings to make some pretty nice money.

Which was why Warriors was now hiding with Time behind a bush, listening to the townspeople chasing them shout in the distance.

Time let out a quiet groan, and Warriors gave his arm a squeeze, trying to get a good look at his face in the darkened forest. He couldn’t make out much in the dim light, but Time’s head felt hot where it was resting on his arm, an occasional tremble wracking through him.

“How are you feeling old man,” Warriors asked under his breath, and Time merely hummed quietly in reply.

The captain gave his shoulder a squeeze, then poked his head above the bush they were hiding behind. His frown deepened at the lantern lights that were bobbing in their direction, and he sank back down, trying to think through the mess they were in.

They were being chased by nearly the entire population of a town of bandits, his only ally was half-awake and getting less coherent by the minute, and he had no clue which direction the other heroes or any help might be in.

So, business as usual.

“Don’t go in the bushes, th’ dekus ‘ll get you...” Time suddenly mumbled, and Warriors gave him a concerned look. He hadn’t been speaking much sense for the past several minutes, and only seemed to be getting worse, muttering increasingly indecipherable sentences with sweat trickling down his brow.

How long until he couldn’t keep going?

Time suddenly let out a loud laugh, breaking his thoughts, and Warriors slapped a hand over his mouth.

“Time shh, are you trying to get us caught?” he hissed, and Time blinked at him, eye looking oddly milky from what the captain could see of it.

“M’ not getting us caught,” he huffed once Warriors removed his hand. Then he let out a high-pitched giggle, and Warriors stared at him incredulously. Time never... giggled. That drug was hitting him hard, and fast, it must have been some powerful stuff.

Time’s head lolled a bit, and he blinked up at Warriors, a goofy smile on his face.

“The cuccoos never listen anyway,” he assured, flopping a hand up and patting his cheek. “They just gliiiide away. Stop worryin’ about it.”

“I’m not just worried about them, I’m worried about you,” Warriors said sharply, dismay at the situation abruptly intensifying. He didn’t know if Time had been just drugged or poisoned or what, but no matter what it was he couldn’t do anything about it right now and Time just kept getting worse and he didn’t even know if he was understanding him anymore—

Warriors shook off his thoughts with a heavy sigh, and Time stared at him for a second before patting him on the arm.

“M’ sorry cap’n... I’ll call the frogs, they’ll help us,” he whispered comfortingly, then took in a deep breath and positively bellowed. “FROGS WE NEED YOU—”

Warriors slapped his hand over his mouth again.

“Don’t call the frogs, okay? Forget the frogs,” he whispered frantically, trying to get his feelings back in the box where they usually rested in situations like this. The sight of Time, normally so coolheaded but currently so confused, was rattling him more than he cared to think about.

Not to mention the shouts that were growing much too close for comfort.

“We need to keep moving, can you walk at all?” he asked Time in a voice he fought to keep steady, and the older hero hummed.

“I don’t know,” he said, looking at his boots. “I don’t want t’ squish a bug... he’d be sad. Can’ I stay?”

“No, listen Time we can’t stay here,” Warriors whispered harshly, the voices and lanterns much too close now. “There are men chasing us who want to kill us. We need to stay away from them, which means we need to move. Come on soldier!”

Time still looked uncertain, an almost childish frown on his face as he looked at the grass.

Warriors sighed again. “You’re not going to squish any bugs, okay?”

Time hesitated, then suddenly lurched upright, almost falling back down until Warriors steadied him.

“‘Kay,” he mumbled.

Warriors breathed out a relieved sigh, and began to pull Time steadily through the woods, wincing whenever their armor clanked or the leaves crunched under their feet. He figured they’d focus on outmaneuvering the bandits, putting distance between their pursuers and them, and hopefully find a place to properly hide so he could try to help Time.

Fighting would be their absolute last resort.

They’d gone maybe half a mile before Time’s steps truly began to lag, his weight growing heavier where Warriors was supporting him. The captain pursed his lips and continued to pull him along, despite how shaky the older hero was getting.

“Come on old man,” he muttered, and continued to walk, trying to increase his pace.

Time suddenly sagged in Warriors’ grip, so abruptly that the captain nearly had to lunge forward to stop him from falling on his face.

“Time, hey, are you with me?” he whispered, and Time groaned, putting a hand to his forehead as he kneeled on the ground. A bead of sweat trickled down his face, and he abruptly blinked up at Warriors, staring at him with both eyes wide.

Then they both slid shut.

“Oh no old man, don’t give out on me,” Warriors whispered frantically, shaking Time’s shoulders. “Stay awake, focus. I’m not strong enough to carry you far, you need to stay awake.”

The older hero only groaned a little and looked over Warriors’ shoulder at something, gaze unfocused.

“‘lfie...” he slurred, eyes half-lidded.

Warriors bit his lip and scanned the forest around them, ignoring the persistent shouts that were once again drawing too close for comfort. He spotted a small overhang of rocks that would provide a bit of a hiding spot, and half-supported half-dragged Time over to them, nearly collapsing once they were underneath.

“‘lfie,” Time slurred again, voice more insistent, and Warriors shushed him as he turned to his pouch, digging around for something to help counteract Time’s condition.

“Just hang tight old man, I think I might still have half a potion in here,” Warriors murmured, almost more to himself then Time. He’d been hoping to stock up at the next town, but that obviously was off the agenda.

His hand finally closed around a bottle after rummaging for several moments, and Warriors turned back towards Time, a hint of a smile on his face.

Which immediately fell away as he saw Time stumbling out back into the woods.

“Time!” Warriors whisper-shouted, and was about to run out after him until a voice spoke something from right next to the outcropping he was hiding in. Warriors froze, listening to the voice that was quickly joined by several more, and stubbornly fought back the lurch of panic in his gut.

The bandits had caught up.

And if he went out and tried to drag Time back in here, there was no way they wouldn’t see him.

“Time! Come back!” Warriors hissed in a barely legible voice, but the old man continued to stumble through the trees, towards something Warriors couldn’t make out in the dim light. All the captain could do was stay where he was and pray Time wouldn’t be spotted.

Time was oddly stealthy as he lurched towards his goal, and Warriors bit his lip as he watched a bandit emerge through the trees, lantern held high. He put a hand on his sword as the man drew closer to Time, prepared to expose himself if he had to, but dearly praying it wouldn’t be necessary.

He was good, but he was also man enough to admit he wouldn’t be able to take on an entire village of bandits alone.

Maybe he could sneak up on the man and take him out without alerting the others? It would be next to impossible not to be seen though, with the amount of light bouncing through the trees. Perhaps he could stay low and avoid the lantern light. Or maybe loop around and stay out of sight?

A sudden growl shattered his thoughts, and both Warriors and the bandit stared towards it, right at where Time was slumped dizzily against a tree. Warriors felt cold determination settle in his chest as the bandit shone his lantern straight at Time, a leering grin visible in the light as Warriors unsheathed his sword.

But the lantern light also caught on a set of bright, wolfish eyes glinting in the shadows behind Time, and another growl reverberated through the trees.

Time grinned.

“Get ‘im Wolfie.”

And with a loud snarl, a wolf jumped at the bandit, the man shrieking in shock and fear. Sleek fur shone in the light of the man’s lantern, the orange glow shining off of sharp fangs, and the man yelled for help from his companions.

Thank the goddesses for Wolfie, Warriors thought as he leapt out of his hiding spot and bolted for Time, grabbing his arm and trying to hoist him back up from where he’d slid down the trunk.

“Come on old man, he’s only going to be able to give us so much time to get away,” Warriors grunted, trying to get Time on his feet. “The noise will draw the others, we need to move.”

Time only grinned, still swaying. “Wolfie! Get th’ bad... th’ bad guys! Good boy! Steak f-for you!”

Warriors slung his arm across his shoulder again, noting the bandit running in the opposite direction and yelling all the while. Wolfie stood panting next to the discarded lantern, but Warriors didn’t stick around to wait for him to catch up.

He was just glad Wild’s... companion, was on their side.

He’d call him a pet, but the first (and last) time he’d said it, Wild had smacked him and Time and Four both had let out strange sounding snorts.

“Wolfie’s the best,” Time sighed, head lolling on his shoulder as they stumbled through the woods, shouts loud behind them. Warriors looked over at him, and Time smiled widely. “So fluffy. M’ proud of Twilight... ‘s a good descendant. Love him.”

Warriors didn’t waste breath on replying, though he did file the descendant part of Time’s rambling back for a later conversation.

A loud shout rang from close by, and Warriors yanked Time to a stop as lantern light shone in their faces, his heart falling as too many men to fight past suddenly encircled them. Warriors carefully deposited Time against a tree behind him, and looked warily around at the eager crowd.

“Well well, cornered like rats,” a woman said eagerly, eyeballing the armor Time wore with greed in her eyes.

“I don’t know who you lot think ye are, but a single mangy mutt ain’t enough ta’ scare us off,” a large man sneered, and Warriors carefully maneuvered his sword in between him and Time. “You two are loaded, and we’re more than eager ta’ help you lighten the load a bit.”

“And if I give you everything we have, you’ll let us go?” Warriors asked with steel in his voice.

Laughter rolled through the group, and the bartender Warriors had earlier been trying to get information from grinned maliciously at him.

“Sorry lad. Can’t have you spreading the word about our little town here, bad for business.”

“What did you put in my companion’s drink?” Warriors said in a dangerous voice, and more snickers went through the crowd of bandits.

“Just a little something to daze him s’we can take all that armor and he won’t even care. An’ kill him too, he won’t even realize!” one laughed, and Warriors felt his blood run cold. “That’s the best bit, they don’t even realize you’ve stabbed ‘em ‘til they’re dead.”

The woman who’d spoken first inched closer, and twirled a dagger between her fingers.

“If you give us all you got without a fight, we’ll make it quick for you, boy,” she said, something almost sympathetic in her eyes.

Warriors merely gritted his teeth and got into a defensive position, tightly clutching his sword.

The bandits jeered, and began to close in, torchlight flashing off the metal of their raised weapons. The number of them was just too much for Warriors to believe he’d truly get out of this, especially with Time to protect, but he’d fight until his dying breath if that’s what it took.

Maybe he could at least provide an opening for Time to get away.

Warriors spared a single glance out at the woods as their enemies approached, but it appeared nobody was coming to help them, the trees silent and dark.

Hang it all, where did Wolfie go?

As if on cue, a howl rang through the trees, making the bandits pause in their approach. One scoffed and continued forward, and the rest followed, only to be stopped again as a second howl rent the night, the first joining it in an eerie harmony.

Warriors raised his eyebrows in surprise at the sound, Wolfie has friends it seems, and the men exchanged nervous glances when a third howl joined.

“You lads afraid of a few beasts?” the bartender scoffed, and began to approach Warriors, leveling a large broadsword. “Not a courageous man among you.”

Warriors raised his sword as the weapon swung down, and suddenly an entire pack of wolves leapt from the bushes at the bandits.

Warriors didn’t even have to parry the blade as it swung at him, a wolf leaping up and closing its jaws around the barkeeper’s arm, the weapon falling to the ground.

The man yelled in pain, and more screams went up from the bandits as the wolves lunged for weak spots and nipped at their heels. Their yellow eyes glowed in the lantern light, and Warriors watched in astonishment as the wolves swarmed the bandits, but didn’t even touch him or Time.

The bandits broke rank only moments later, even the barkeeper turning tail and fleeing back in the direction of the village. Several wolves chased after them, tails wagging almost excitedly, but a few stayed, and looked towards Warriors and Time.

The captain swallowed as several glowing pairs of eyes stared at him (Wolfie wasn’t among them, had he gone with the others to chase the bandits?), but despite the blood on several muzzles, he didn’t feel in any danger.

Oddly enough, he felt... safe.

“Thank you?” he offered to the closest wolf, a large brown and white beast. It made a small chuffing noise and licked his outstretched hand, then turned away and began to trot into the woods, tail swishing behind it.

The other wolves followed, melting back into the shadows, and Warriors suddenly found himself alone, except for Time still leaning dazedly against the tree.

Warriors sheathed his sword with a tired exhale, wiping some sweat off his brow.

That was one of the strangest battles I’ve ever been a part of.

“I wanted to pet one,” Time suddenly spoke up in an incredibly sad voice, and Warriors turned back to him, sighing as he watched a few tears begin to gather in his eyes.

“You can pet Wolfie when we find the others,” Warriors said as he got to his side and patted his shoulder, and Time sniffled, then nodded.

“‘Kay,” he sighed, scrubbing a hand across his eye. Warriors lowered himself onto the ground with a tired sigh, leaning his head against the tree, and Time’s head flopped unceremoniously onto his shoulder.

“Gonna take a nap,” Time murmured, and Warriors nodded, pulling up his scarf and settling it over Time’s shoulders.

“Go ahead old man. I think we’re safe enough here,” he said softly. “You can rest.”

The bandits certainly wouldn’t be in a hurry to try and pursue them again after the wolves’ attack, and based on what the man had said, it looked like the drug Time had consumed merely needed to run its course. As long as Warriors kept an eye out while Time rested, it should be okay.

Here seemed as good of a spot to rest for a while as any.

A rustling noise caught Warriors’ attention, and he watched as a wolf poked its head out of the bushes, the same brown and white wolf that had licked his hand. It trotted over to them, then flopped onto the ground next to Time, resting its head on its paws.

Time’s eyes cracked open, and he extended a hand before Warriors could stop him, scratching the wolf behind its ears. It thumped its tail once, but kept its eyes open, staying at attention, and Warriors looked at it in wonder.

Was the wolf keeping watch for them?

It angled its ears towards him as Time’s hand withdrew, and Warriors blinked, then inwardly shrugged. If one of the wolves that had saved them wanted to keep watch, he’d let them. He trusted Wolfie, and he supposed he trusted any friends of his as well.

Though he had to admit this was one of the oddest situations he’d ever found himself in.

Time’s breathing evened out against his shoulder, and Warriors closed his eyes, feeling completely safe as a howl echoed off in the distance.

 (...)

It was only few hours later when the other heroes found their way into the clearing where Time and Warriors were sleeping, the wolf having left in the night.

Time was still out of it despite the rest, and dozed most of the walk to the rest of the heroes’ camp, falling back asleep immediately after arriving. Warriors told the others what had happened while he slept, and they made the decision to stay where they were until Time recovered, then try and deal more soundly with the bandits.

Twilight and Wild both had odd looks on their faces at the mention of Wolfie and his friends helping them, but they didn’t get a chance to say anything, as Time had woken up again. The older hero had quietly eaten something after he’d first awoken, but was now staring around at all of them with a dazed expression, his visible pupil oddly dilated.

“Is he still out of it?” Wind asked in a worried voice, and Warriors shrugged helplessly, leaning close to Time.

“Hey old man, how’re you feeling?” he asked carefully, and Time stared at him for several moments without blinking. Then his gaze flicked to Wind, and he snorted, shoulders shaking as he began to snicker to himself. “...Time?”

“Sailor, sailor you...” Time put a hand over his mouth, still snickering. “You haven’t noticed...”

“Haven’t noticed what?” Wind asked confusedly, and Time snickered even harder.

“You— you have a lobster on your shirt!”

Time fell over, clutching his sides as he laughed, and the other heroes stared at their oldest lying in the grass, laughing his head off at the design on Wind’s tunic.

“Er, Time, why don’t you come lie down again,” Twilight offered, and Time stopped laughing and stared directly at him.

“Five three two one four.”

Twilight blinked, and Time continued to stare, and the others exchanged bemused looks.

“What does that mean?” Hyrule asked, and Time sat up much straighter, looking around at them all with a serious expression.

“Five three two one four,” Time rattled off again, eyes still unfocused. “Twenty-three is number one, but two is when They appear, Four is a smithy and four giants are coming, but there’s only three days until the milk needs to be delivered and he’s always one second too fast no matter how the Keaton runs—”

“I think he’s still out of it,” Legend said in a deadpan as Time continued to spout nonsense.

“Wow, you think?” Warriors said sarcastically as he carefully sat Time up. “At least his fevers gone down, even if he’s... not making much sense.”

“Are we sure this is just going to wear off?” Sky asked uncertainly, watching Time babble something about seahorses and Zora eggs.

“I’ve seen something similar before, I believe it will,” Warriors said. “It’ll just take some time.”

“Six medallions, all for Malon, all aglow in the light of dawn,” Time sang drunkenly, head flopping onto Warriors’ arms. “Epona needs the mask but It’s my turn to wear it—”

“Ooookay, anybody else think it’s time he went back to bed?” Wild said, sounding equally amused and concerned. “Maybe he can try and just sleep the rest of this off?”

“Sounds like a good idea,” Twilight replied, lowering himself to Time’s side. “Come on old man, you could use some more rest.”

Time blinked at him, then whipped his hand out and snagged Twilight’s arm, grinning as he gave it a squeeze.

“Tell Wolfie we appreciate him and thanks,” Time said earnestly, his hands shaking a bit as he patted Twilight’s cheek. His voice turned suddenly serious. “He’s my favorite. He should bite the moon.”

Twilight blinked. “Uh...”

Then Time abruptly slumped against Warriors’ shoulder again, a quiet snore escaping his lips. Several amused snickers went up from the heroes, and Twilight and Warriors both sighed in relief.

“This stuff better wear off soon,” Twilight said with an exasperated look, and Warriors nodded.

“I still don’t know how you managed to get away from all those bandits with him acting like this,” Sky said in disbelief, watching as the captain pulled a blanket up to Time’s chin.

Warriors sighed, and watched Time sleep for a moment, his face twitching slightly. A part of him couldn’t quite believe it either, especially seeing how Time was acting now.

“We wouldn’t have if Wolfie hadn’t managed to find all those wolves to help us,” he finally hummed, brushing some hair out of Time’s face. “I don’t think we’d have made it otherwise.”

Twilight hesitated. “About that, I... I don’t think Wolfie did.”

“...What do you mean?”

Twilight and Wild exchanged looks, and the champion’s voice was careful when he spoke.

“Wolfie was with me and Twilight last night captain, he couldn’t have been with you and Time,” Wild explained, scratching the back of his head. “We were nowhere near you, trust me, we would’ve come and helped.”

Warriors blinked, and looked over at Time sleeping on his shoulder.

“So what you’re saying is, a random pack of wolves just decided to help us?” he asked in disbelief, and Wild shrugged.

“I mean, that’s what it looks like?”

The heroes all mulled that over, going quiet for a moment as Time continued to quietly snore.

“That means almost all of us have either been saved or safely interacted with a wolf that wasn’t Wolfie now,” Four spoke up in a wondering voice.

“That’s kinda freaky,” Legend muttered, his chin resting on his hand from where he was seated across camp. “Why would they randomly help us?”

“You think it has something to do with us being the heroes?” Wind piped up. “Wolfie hangs around us, right? Maybe someone is helping us by sending more wolves!”

“What, like the goddesses?” Legend snorted, and Wind huffed.

“Well it was just an idea,” the sailor pouted, and Warriors ruffled his hair.

“Well whatever the reason is, I’m glad they decided to help us,” Warriors declared, and Time let out a loud snore. The captain chuckled, and leaned back against the log he was seated against. “I owe them our lives.”

A distant howl echoed from somewhere in the forest, and the heroes went silent again, Twilight’s ears twitching as another howl answered.

“I guess we might not ever know why they helped,” Wild murmured.

Twilight looked up at the sky, his ears still twitching.

“I guess not.”

[nightshade-clown]

Okay I just want to dump my Magoranza headcanons because of another post I saw, even though I should definitely sleeping right now (￣ヘ￣;)

Okay, so my headcanons are more pre-relationship based but I still want to share them so badly ( ꈍᴗꈍ)

Additional note: I repeat a lot "Magolor" and "Taranza" instead of using stuff like "the mage" and "the spider" and other stuff, so yeah, I apologize for the repetitions, I might edit it later to fix that.

☬ I kinda imagine they have a "A fell first and B fell harder" kind of situation lmao.

☬ Magolor first seeing Taranza around, and noticing he always looked miserable in a way (it would happen not long after the events of triple deluxe). So he decides to approach him and go "Hey, wanna hang out ? (^-^)" which Taranza accepts because Magolor gives him an excuse to occupy his mind.

☬ Magolor only asked Taranza to spent time together out of pity for him, but soon come to appreciate his company because not only is Taranza pretty smart and helpful, but he can be pretty mischievous despite his seemingly calm attitude. So obviously Magolor keeps him around because he could always use some help with his shoppe and with his research on the Lor.

☬ And sure, they both share similar interests, and they get along pretty well, and Magolor even allows Taranza to sit on the roof of his shoppe and only him, but that doesn't mean they're close ! And the fact that he is impressed by Taranza's knowledge doesn't mean anything either, and neither the fact that Magolor wants to spend more time with him, or that he thinks it's cute how clumsy Taranza can be, or when he re-do his hair from time to time, and sure, Taranza definitely looks so fine with that new scarf-

☬ And before he knows it, Magolor fell in love with the spider.

☬ His first reaction is to hit his head against the table upon realization. How did that happen ?! WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN ?

☬ After a few minutes, he calms down, and just moves on. It's not the end of the world, right ? No need to act weirdly about it.

☬ Though, after he realizes his feelings, Magolor will act a bit differently with Taranza. No big changes, it's pretty subtle actually. Offers discount at his shoppe and on some days even offer some items "because it wouldn't sell"; taking an interest in some of Taranza's hobbies he didn't share with him previously "because seems interesting"; and even studying some of Floralia's culture "in case one day I want to visit so I can be prepared".

☬ He would sometimes flirt a bit but quickly brush it off as a joke, and with his prankster personality, Taranza just rolls with it.

☬ As for Taranza, he doesn't see Magolor as anything other than a friend for a while. Like I said earlier, he would just see Magolor as a way too think about something other than Sectonia's death. But quickly comes to appreciate Magolor as a friend, despite his tendancies to make off putting jokes and being a bit apathetic.

☬ He sees Magolor as a smart person, not only for all the researches he does, but for his projects too like the attraction park he made for Kirby, and his business with the shoppe. And he's fun too, always knows what to do when they hangs out, which Taranza appreciate a lot. It's like a breath of fresh air compared to the strict ambiance in the castle of Floralia. And he finds fascinating all of the tales Magolor has about other dimensions, or about Halcandra.

☬ For a while, he doesn't really notices Magolor's flirting, mainly because he only sees him as a friend, but also because he still feel like he can't completely moves on from Sectonia. When he thinks of love, the first thing he thinks about is her, his dear Queen.

☬ It's not until someone else points it out (either Susie or Marx) that Magolor acts differently with him compared to everyone else (Marx would probably complains about the free stuff Taranza gets, while Susie would points out how Magolor took a sudden interests on things related to him) that Taranza starts noticing this too. And he also notice how Magolor only "jokingly" flirt only with him.

☬ Boi does that spider gets flustered.

☬ Taranza spends the following few days questioning if Magolor really likes him like that, and how he feels about it.

☬ And for the first time, he start thinking of romantic love without thinking about Sectonia, but about Magolor instead. And he likes it (even if a part of him feels guilty about it).

☬ After a few more days after he realizes that he might be in love with Magolor, Taranza starts making moves on him too, a bit less subtly though.

☬ If he gets the occasion, he buys and gift him all kinds of stuff, be it something Magolor took an interest of while walking in around in the waddle Dee's town, or something related to his interests, or it could even be something related to his research (or something Taranza at least thinks is related to his interests). Most of the time, the gifts are pretty spontaneous.

☬ Magolor would joke about how Taranza is spoiling him, and Taranza would laugh it off, albeit extremely flustered.

☬ He would also do all kinds of favours to Magolor, helping more around the shoppe more than usual, and proposing more help with his researches.

☬ Magolor does notice the sudden change of behavior in Taranza, how he suddenly seems more nervous and flustered easily, and how he seems more clumsy while helping sometimes. He decides not to question it, though. It's kinda endearing to see, after all.

☬ It kinda goes on like that for a while, the two just flirting with each other without much else going on after, and it's this kind of awkward phase between friendship and romance where the both don't know where they stand at this point.

☬ Until one day, Kirby asks them if they are a couple. Magolor starts chuckling while Taranza starts choking on air.

☬ Magolor teasingly asks Taranza "Well, wouldn't we make a cute couple ?" which flusters Taranza A LOT.

☬ After a few seconds of trying to calm down enough to talk, Taranza reply "Maybe we would, don't you think so too ?" which ends up flustering Magolor back.

☬ And all the while Kirby is looking at them like "What the heck is going on ? (◍•ᴗ•◍)"

Anyway, that's also how they ended up together. BYE-

[cceanvvaves]

bookstore; m.mn

(moved to isanggayfrog) warning: none

You sighed in relief the moment you stepped inside the quiet bookstore. The people rushing about outside as they tried to finish up shopping were erased from your mind, your senses focusing only on the numerous books within your reach. Your fingers grazed the dusty book covers, showing just how many people were really interested in literature. Your nostrils took in the intoxicating scent of old paper and new books alike, making you smile. Your masked footsteps echoed around the small room as you gazed at the tall shelves.

The cashier who worked here, Maria, had informed you of the newest edition of the series you'd been following. It was pretty popular, so you hoped to purchase one before it sold out. So, you headed straight to the nearest shop.

You tried to pry your eyes away from all the other welcoming books, whispering to yourself that you only had enough money for one book, and you knew exactly what you wanted to get.

Once you reached the very back, you spotted it immediately. Its beautiful emerald cover was intricately engraved with gold patterns. You reached up and was about to lay a finger on its spine when another hand intercepted yours.

Without meaning to your hand brushed against the stranger's, and you couldn't help but relish the feeling of their warmth. You turned, meeting a girl's eyes. "Um, hello. Are you going to buy that?" you asked, gesturing to the book in her hands.

Are you stupid, Y/N? A voice in your head hissed. Why would she get it if she wasn't going to buy it?

Hey, maybe she just wanted to look, you retorted.

You didn't notice the girl scanning you from head to toe, taking in the scarf around your mouth and the slightly oversized sweater that hung off your figure. "Yes. I suppose you wanted this, too?"

"Mmm," you hummed, glancing back up. "Unfortunately that seems to be the last one."

"Yes," she said amusedly. "Do you want it?" She offered the book to you, and although your mind screamed at you to take it and run, your heart disagreed.

"Oh, no. I can wait for the next stock."

"But it would take a while!"

"Haha, yeah," you said nervously, rubbing the back of your neck. You couldn't even order food without being awkward, much less hold a whole conversation with someone you didn't know. That changed when the girl spoke again, though.

"My name is Mina," the girl smiled, extending a hand. "And uh, I hope I don't sound creepy, but where do you live? I feel like I've seen you before."

She's too beautiful to be a stalker, you thought. "I'm Y/N, and I live in an apartment nearby, on the 16th floor. You?"

"No way," Mina gasped. "I live there, too! On the same floor! And I bet you're my neighbor."

Your eyes widened when you realized that, yes, you had seen her before. But it was when you were rushing to get to work early, so you didn't stop by to chat.

"Hey, I have an idea," she stated. "How about I purchase this book, and you can come over and read with me?"

"I-I, uh," you stuttered. You shouldn't seem too eager, but you shouldn't act uninterested either. Clearing your throat, you pulled down your sleeves. "Yeah, sure. But are you sure you want to pay for it? I can treat you.."

Mina grinned, showing off her gummy smile and making your heart beat faster. "You can treat me some other time. Maybe we can grab a coffee together?"

Was she asking you out?

"Um, yeah, sure," you replied lamely. Biting your lip awkwardly, you tried again. "Yes, of course. Maybe.. later?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "Here, by the way. Don't lose it." She stuffed a crumpled piece of paper into your hand and winked, waving on her way to the cashier. "Don't forget to text me the time and location, cutie."

You just stood there dumbstruck, smiling subconsciously when you recalled her smile.

Hey, you just scored a date, after all.

[wearykatie]

The Journey Into the Wild Beyond

Chapter 2: Hither (Part 1)

On arrival in Prismeer, the party is dumped in Hither, one of three lands divided by thick layers of fog that make travel between them extremely difficult. This was an alien world to the player characters, and it’s my first chance to really dive into Feywild things.

Down the Rabbit Hole

I had to separate Elora from the party for this part to one, resolve the nightmare she rolled in the previous chapter, and two, to introduce a character. 

Let’s get to the nightmare first. In it, Elora is back home with her sister, Ana’leth. Ana keeps looking through Elora’s room for something Elora lost but doesn’t say what it is. It’s then she notices an ominous wardrobe at the back of the room that doesn’t belong. When Ana approaches it, it opens and four skeletal hands grab her and pull her inside. 

When Elora wakes, she’s greeted by a blue harengon (a type of rabbit folk in D&D) by the name of Alice. 

You won’t find Alice in The Wild Beyond the Witchlight because she’s a character I made specifically for this campaign. The book does provide guides who can take the party between the different lands of Prismeer but they’re a little weird. There’s a scarecrow, an oilcan, and a dandelion (meant to reference the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Cowardly Lion from The Wizard of Oz). They aren’t so much guides as plot devices, they’re easy to miss if the party doesn’t go to specific areas, and I wasn’t thrilled with using a scarecrow described as being brought to life when the one of the hags imbued it with the “tormented soul” of a child.

So I exchanged three Wizard of Oz references for an Alice In Wonderland reference. Alice was enigmatic at first. Clearly knew more than she was letting on, seemed a bit mischievous, and had very vague abilities. I wanted her to be somewhat like the Cheshire Cat. She gave Elora a set of rules to play with. 

Rules are made to be bent, not broken. 

A promise made is a promise kept.

The price is in the paying, not the sum. 

The intended meaning of these would be found out later, but the first means there are no concrete rules to how things in Prismeer work unless you’re really testing the limits of that, and then you will get pushback. The second means that making a promise is equal to keeping it, if you promise someone something, it’s expected you’ll follow through. The third means that in rules of trade, as long as you’re offering something, you’re paying - monetary value doesn’t matter. 

This was kind of my replacement for the Rules of Conduct in the book which are rules Zybilna set in place and apparently enforces with some pretty twisted punishment. Like binding a thief’s scarf to his neck and then hanging him from a tree as tall as a skyscraper in undying agony for eternity. 

We will get to my Zybilna rewrites. 

Alice offered this advice, then led Elora to the rest of the party and promptly vanished into thin air. We’ll see more of her later.

The party soon found more harengons! Brigands working under the aforementioned guy who was hanged from a tree, Agdon Longscarf. The party talked and intimidated their way out of a fight and sent the brigands packing. That’s fine, there are other encounters out there.

The First and Last Random Encounter

I love random encounter tables. 

I hate running random encounters. 

My dislike comes from preparing random encounters, balancing enemies, setting up maps, and doing tons of preparation just on the off chance that maybe the party runs into that particular thing. Well, they did this time. Mud mephits. Combat went well, but it was slow as every 5e combat is, and it usually boils down to just shouting numbers at each other. 

That’s my biggest criticism with 5th edition - and yes internet, I’m aware that other games exist. Believe me, everyone who has ever dared mention D&D on the internet has been inundated with replies about how this other system is way better and far less problematic and we should really stop playing D&D because there are better games out there if we just give them a chance. I KNOW. But my 41 year old brain knows 5th edition, likes 5th edition, and isn’t likely to pick up on a new game that easily. 

What was I saying? Oh yeah, combat in D&D sucks. And I think that’s partly a scaling issue, because the more players and enemies you have the more rounds you have, and there’s not a lot of room for roleplaying while you’re trying to figure out how many d6s to roll.

But that encounter had Elora pouring an alchemy jug full of salt water onto the mud mephits to see what would happen. Because alchemist. Hmm…idea brewing. 

Early to Rise

Chapter 2 was also when Early’s player was finally able to join the game. I caught her up beforehand by running through an abbreviated version of Chapter 1 from Early’s perspective in a way that would fit with the events the rest of the party went through, but let the two stories happen in parallel without Early meeting the others until Chapter 2. No retcons for me. 

Yet. 

Early also went through the mirror portal but ended up several feet in the air. She used Featherfall to save herself, but ended up stuck in a tree dangling only inches off the ground but unable to break free. She doesn’t know how long she was like that - could be minutes, could be years. She’s the one with no sense of time. 

The party freed her, and she fit right in after they learned she was from the Magewood Academy too and was on the same quest. 

Shortly after, wells all around Hither began to erupt like geysers and the swamp-like terrain started to flood. Luckily for the party, a mobile inn happened to pass by. Oh, that’s pretty cool. What does this thing look like? How does it move about? 

*checks the book*

It’s a building that moves around on legs in the middle of a swamp. 

Wild Beyond the Witchlight writers, I know y’all read stories, you reference quite a few. Did you deliberately make an inn that would evoke images of Baba Yaga? 

So I described that horror show and somehow the players trusted that enough to get a decent night’s rest at the inn while they waited for the flood waters to recede. The innkeeper, Tsu, is an elderly druid who wants to see Zybilna return to power. 

During this downtime, Elora finally read her letter. It confirmed her worst fears - Ana had died on a mission to Falcon Hollow. This confused the players because that was an arc in Royal Flush. Ana was captured, her old teacher helped them rescue her, and everyone made it out alive. That was a couple of weeks ago in game time. Well, clearly the letter was mistaken. But, that was out of character knowledge. In character, everyone found out that Elora’s sister had just died. 

Fun Wacky Adventure Time In the Feywild! Also, Dead Siblings

Okay, so this was going to be a tough balancing act both for me and for the players. One party member is a teenager dealing with a very personal loss and she’s meant to carry on and have zany adventures and save a whole other realm. She should be curled up in a ball and crying for the rest of the game. How do you navigate around that?

Well, with friends. She’s got four friends to check on her and help her power through - one of them is a cleric with a unique perspective on death. But also, the show must go on, and K knew that, so they played Elora as kind of putting off her grief until the job was done. 

The party also got a delivery while at the inn - a gift from Titania, the Summer Queen. See, they helped one of her knights early on in Hither, and she rewarded them with a tiny acorn house. By speaking her name, they would be shrunk down and transported inside where they could take a long rest anywhere. This was an item I found in Through the Veil: Treasures of the Feywild, a book of fey-themed items recommended by a friend.

And hey, it meant I didn’t have to roll for random encounters during long rests. 

Rhin also had a dream during the night. In it, she’s witnessing a funeral she saw in her youth. A widower offered prayers to the earth to accept their beloved. Rhin also saw an elven woman dressed all in black sitting on a bench beckoning her to sit with her. The woman pointed out various other funerals happening and the ways the people conducted the ceremonies. Some were sad, some joyous, some angry, some religious. 

The woman said there was beauty in all things, even death. A skilled artist could work with the colors of death and mourning. She encouraged Rhin to recover what she lost, and as she walked away, Rhin saw that the woman’s cloak was made of raven feathers.

I’ve used dreams twice in this chapter to convey things. I know people have mixed feelings on that as a writing tool, but the nature of the things that were taken from the player characters is very personal - something they couldn’t really get clues to from other people. So, when Rhin found out her missing thing was in Hither, she got a dream or vision from the goddess of death telling her to meditate on what was missing and find it. 

Each player character would experience one or more of these dreams, and some of them delve into light horror. I really wanted the missing things to be large parts of the story that drove the player characters forward and redefined them when they got them back. 

But, that’s enough for one part. Next time, more chapter 2, more harengons, some frogs, and the first hag.

[notdogice]

Time for the biggest batch of Pony Town cos': The Deltarune Edition! I started making these ones around late 2021 (possibly November) and I tried to make them as sprite accurate as I could so these ones are a lot more timeless regardless of how I change the way I stylize certain ponies.

Spamton G. Spamton. The very first one of my Deltarune cos', and probably the most iconic. I call him the Big Haired Big Shot. Spamton's head to body ratio is already bonkers in his sprite, so I tried to recreate that effect in PT. For the hair, I actually used one of my other ponies, Carlos, as the inspiration. He can also do the hands together thing he does in Deltarune.

Spamton Neo. Yup, it works for Neo as well. I was kind of worried that this wouldn't work, but it does! Works best when flying, but it's pretty funny seeing him lie down.

Kris. Yeah not much to say for Kris, but they're literally the easiest Deltarune cos you can do. Their eyes are closed, but I do have the pupils colored for expression sake whilst still being accurate.

Kris (DW). I fucking love this cos. It was fun to figure out how I should do the scarf and pauldron. It's on of my favourites of this set. Also has the eye thing like the light world counterpart.

Susie. Yeah LW Susie wasn't fun, especially after doing her DW counter part.

Susie (DW). FUCK YEAH SHE ROCKS. Only real gripe is with her hair.

Ralsei. Cute, but kind of ugly. One thing I've noticed is that people really don't try to do with the hat with horns when they do the hatted Ralsei.

Ralsei (No hat). Getting the goat horns just right because it is possible to do so. Definately experiamental with this one.

Berdly. Very smug indeed. Lovely.

Berdly (DW). You know, as I did more of these cos', I had gotten better at recogizing which options would work best with what I was trying to acheive. DW Berdly is a key example of this as getting his armor right used things I've done for Kris and Queen. Yeah these aren't in order how I made them, but I just want to keep things organized.

Noelle. Fun fact: Noelle is the only lightner that I had did their LW sprite before their DW. Yup. I did the more complicated designs first. Really the onlt thing about Noelle that I had really tried to figure out was her antlers. Yeah PT has antlers, but I wasn't really satisfied with them, they didn't seem Noelley enough.

Noelle (DW). To be honest, Noelle is easy to make in PT. I could've went with the shirt with hood option, but none of color options fit with what I was trying to do. Plus you wouldn't really notice that it's not there unless you move the head.

Lancer. Lancer's head is a hell of a pain to do. I'm not very satisfied with what I got, but it's the only thing that looks half decent with this style. He's extra round when he sits. Kind of took that idea of using the wings from someone else's Lancer, but I haven't seen anyone else but that person and I do it so it isn't a popular thing people do for Lancer, but it should honestly.

Queen. People have pointed out how I managed to give her that Megamind look, and I really appreciate it. I'm kind of surprised to see that she's the fourth Deltarune cos I made when I thought she was one of the later middle cos'. Her eyes do work like Kris' does. Another unique thing about this Queen cos is that I used the customizable mark to fix the curve between her top and bottom half.

Rouxls Kaard. One of my later ones as I holded off from doing him thinking he'd be a tough on to figure out. He was just like his puzzles. Like most of his detail in his sprite is in the one area where you can't see it on a pony.

Jevil. Ah Jevil, the first Deltarune character to appear in one of my dreams... He ran a fish taco stand. Uh other than that, one of my favoutie area on this cos is his ears. like they are so sprite accurate and very pretty. Everything else is standard fair with the others.

C Round. People love it whenever I switch to this cos, and whenever they put a crown on it...

K Round. You get this! Man it was tough figuring how to do the checker just right, but the results speak for itself. One of my favouties of the set. I've seen a few other's tries of making this character in PT, but they seem to get similar results to mine.

Rudin. A rare cos indeed. Actually I don't think I've ever seen another Rudin cos on PT. A shame really, I like Rudin's design.

Rudin Ranger. You thought regualr ol' Rudin was rare? Feast your eyes on this! Both of them are very pretty.

Hathy. It was the mouth I struggled the most with on. I do not have Head Hathy, I was too frustrated with this one.

Tasque. Meow. Another easy one to do, but doesn't get as much love as a certain...

Tasque Manager. Someone called my Tasque Manager cute a few weeks back. She was a fun one to make, but her tail breaks when she sits.

Maus. Not too difficult to make this Maus. This is also my newest Deltarune cos.

Since I have the room for them, here are some bonus Undertale cos' I have!

Frisk. I've been playing PT since 2017 and it took me until 2022 to make a Frisk cos. I still haven't made a Sans yet either which is surprising as I got into Undertale before I got into PT.

Asgore. My first UT cos, and it was Asgore of all people. Like seriously, you don't get to see Asgore cos' all to often if ever. This could probably be blamed by the fact that you don't get to spend that much time with him outside of his battle and most of what you learn about him is through everyone else experience with him.

Mettaton EX. The hardest thing I had to do with this cos was finding his his overworld sprite for his colors. Like everything else just using things I have done for other cos' like using the mask like how I did with K Round and Frieza. I guess I did have to think about hair options, but that is a given when it comes to making anything in PT. Anyway, that's the last of the set.

[warriorteam1924]

J'ai publié 873 fois en 2022 => posted 873 times (so far   ^^)

65 billets créés (7%) => 65 created posts. that’s not a lot i know.... 

808 billets reblogués (93%) => 808 reblogs hey not bad 

Les blogs que j'ai le plus reblogués :

@eileen-crys

@painandpleasure86

@julescape

@deakys-chesthair

@beydeaks​

=> that’s because they are my lovelies 

J'ai étiqueté 873 billets en 2022 => tags ahah 

#warriorteam1924 reblogs - 794 billets

#dont shun it queue it - 759 billets

#queen - 682 billets

#john deacon - 444 billets

#freddie mercury - 312 billets

#brian may - 216 billets

#roger taylor - 216 billets

#veronica tetzlaff - 90 billets

#johnica - 85 billets

#joe mazzello - 81 billets

Tag le plus long : 102 caractères

#forgive my lack of inspiration and my lack of time but eh 2 edits and 2 fics isnt that bad ahahaha lol

=> lol that is so lame ^^”

Mes billets vedette en 2022 : top 5 posts in 2022

n°5

Sooo i did something 💖💜

77 notes - publié le 23 août 2022

n°4

Write your letters in the sand

Ben Hardy x Reader

Author’s note : Hi my beauties. Here we are for a lil something for  the amazing Ben Hardy’s Birthday. It’s dedicated to a special someone to me, but feel free to read it if you want to. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks in advance for the feedback. Also, I remind you English is not my mother tongue, sorry for the mistakes….

Warnings : None, I guess it’s okay

Summary : Another Birthday with Ben....

Words count : 1,661words

Permanent tag list : @reavenedges-lies @thosequeenboys @born-to-lose @orionis8689 @queenlover05​

 The weather was incredibly and surprisingly mild for the season. Even if it was still winter, you frowned as you noticed you didn’t need a scarf or your hat to get out. Even the dogs seemed to be happy to be able to go in the garden freely, not having to put their coats on.

Voir l'intégralité du billet <= to see the post 

78 notes - publié le 2 janvier 2022

n°3

J’ai deux amours....

Ben Hardy X FemReader

Author’s note : Hi my beauties. This piece is very special because it was actually a request…. It took me quite some time, but i do hope the person who requested will like it. Well,  I hope you all enjoy it. Thanks in advance for the feedback. Also, I remind you English is not my mother tongue, sorry for the mistakes….

@/anon who requested : I hope you like it…. Sorry it took some time to write this one. I know the plot is not Ben actually dating a french gal, but this is how inspiration came. 

Request from anon : Hey ! I saw that you wrote an imagine about ben dating a brazilian girl, could you write one about him dating a french girl ?

Warnings : none I think, some parts are in french, but it’s not too hard

Summary : Ben visiting France.... 

Words count : 3,280 words

Permanent tag list : @reavenedges-lies​ ​ @thosequeenboys​ @born-to-lose​ @orionis8689​ @queenlover05​ (please feel free to let me know it’s now useless to tag you, i wouldn’t want anyone to feel like they have to read anything i might be posting)

It was a special day for you. At last, you had been able to get back to Paris again, to visit your favorite museum, The Louvres. The place was huge, with so many different pieces of art, so many departments, but also so many tourists and visitors.

Voir l'intégralité du billet <= see the whole post here 

86 notes - publié le 4 avril 2022

n°2

Ethereal.... Colorized by me 💖💜

=> oh yes this one has been my phone wallpaper for quite some time, so beautiful ^^ 

89 notes - publié le 2 mai 2022 

Mon billet n°1 en 2022

Voir l'intégralité du billet

106 notes - publié le 6 février 2022 

=> when i think some gifs makers get thousands of notes. that’s a shame cause i don’t think mine are so bad honestly.....

well it’s been a busy year, but i’ve tried to create a bit. my top 5 isn’t that bad, even if the First one hardly gets over 100 notes. 

I’m probs gonna repeat myself, but folks, stop asking for reblogs and support if you don’t do it yourself. I think my rates are not fair regarding the way i reblog a full load of stuff. and im full busy, so that’s not an excuse. just move your ass and do it, or else you just shut up about your own creations. 

I’m not going to carry on cause people will think i’m not enjoying being here anylonger, which isn’t the case. I love the queen/borhaps fandom. I have the tendency not to understand people and the way they behave. that’s all

Take care everyone and thanks to all of you who keep on supporting me, like when you reblog stuff, and not only new stuff or stuff you only see passing in front of your nose. again, it’s not that hard ^^ 

love you all  💖💜

[nanaoise08squad]

Winter date with Kyojuro

Author's note: a friend of mine posted a lovely picture of Kyojuro, all bundled up for the winter and waiting for someone in the snow. This gave me terrible brainrot to make a fluffy fic where you go on a first date with Kyojuro. I don't post to Tumblr a lot, so forgive the formatting and errors as its 2am and I lack the brain power to edit haha. Enjoy!

Of course the train would run late today if all days, he's probably standing out there freezing to death. what a way to start a first date

You grumbled to yourself as you crossed the road to the entrance of the park. Though it had snowed the night before, mercifully the sun was shining brightly today and the wind was calm. It was still cold enough, however, for guilt about your tardiness to weigh on your mind as you rushed to the meeting spot to find your date.

It didn't take long for you to find him among the snowy backdrop, his golden hair and brilliant smile greeting you warmly as you approached the observation deck of the lake.

"I'm so sorry to keep you waiting in the cold, of course the train just *had* to be delayed today" you laughed lightly, playing off the inconvenience and your nerves with a joke as he shook his head and walked to meet you halfway.

"It's no trouble, promise! I got your text, and it's actually not too bad out at all today!" He beamed, you could see that the tip of his nose was blushed red from the cold, nearly the same color as the cable knit scarf draped loosely around his neck. He seemed utterly unphased with the cold, his brown winter jacket unbuttoned as he made his way to greet you. Your stomach did a small flip as you both stood in an awkward silence for a moment, first date jitters taking over before he mercifully filled the silence. 

"There is a great coffee and tea stand on the other side of the lake, if you'd like we can take a walk around the trails for a bit and then grab something to drink? My treat of course" He smiled warmly, offering his arm to you as you nodded and hooked your arm with his. The sun felt nice across your face as you walked along the snow laden path, talking of the work week at first before going on one of many branching tangents. The scenery was picturesque, the lake itself seeming to shimmer as cristiline flurries of powderly snow danced over it's icy surface with the slight breeze. He excitedly pointed to the far bank, noting how it was beginning to thaw and his joy that spring would be coming soon. It seemed like no time had passed at all before you made it to the other side of the lake, a small clearing with benches and a few food vendors for visitors to peruse even in the wintertime. 

"Let's get you some coffee, or tea if you'd prefer. They actually have a good variety of both" He smiled, gently tapping the back of your hand with his as a look of worry passed over his face. He'd been so captivated by your beauty and so happy to see you again, he'd failed to notice your lack of gloves and a scarf. He was too busy getting lost in hearing about your latest book discovery and memorizing how you liked your eggs to think about how cold it was today. 

"Goodness, your hands are freezing, im so sorry for just now noticing you are without gloves and a scarf my dear" His brow furrowed lightly, acting strictly on instinct as he clasped both of his hands over your own and began rubbing them lightly. A rush of heat flooded your face, your cheeks flushing light pink as you stood stunned for a moment. In terms of physical contact, taking his arm to walk together was as close as you'd ventured so far. Now, both of his hands were clasped over your own as he tried to keep you warm. 

His hands are so warm and soft….and caring. He's so thoughtful and kind. I'm not upset in the slightest at this. In fact...he can keep holding them if he wants to

A moment passes before he realizes how bold he'd been, a small blush creeping across his cheeks as his grip on your hands loosened, allowing you to pull back if you wanted to. He'd acted on impulse, his only concern was to keep you warm without thinking of it possibly being too soon to hold your hand…or if you even wanted to. 

"I apologize, that was brash of me. I wanted to make sure you were warm and I should have asked-"

"It's ok, I'm uhm..thankful actually." You smile sweetly, not moving your hands from his but taking a small step closer. "The truth is,I did forget my gloves and scarf in a rush out the door today.I was...I was just so excited to see you again and it slipped my mind. And…i'm glad you are here to keep me warm." You said softly, the light blush in your cheeks intensifying as he smiled in a way that made your heart melt on the spot.The adoration in his eyes as he looked at you made you weak in the knees already, butterflies jumping in your stomach as he brought your hands up to his lips to blow his warm breath across your knuckles to heat up your hands. You could tell you were falling for him fast, replaying the way he said "dear" over and over on loop as you tried to play it cool. 

After all, You'd only met a few weeks before today. A mixup of your orders at your local coffee shop turned into friendly chit chat as you worked on your writings, quickly morphing into 6 drinks later and hours of effortless talking before either of you realized the shop was closing soon. You left that evening simply thinking about how wonderful it was to finally talk to someone as passionate about things as you were, only to start to kick yourself days later for not getting his number as you found that his smile and voice were never far from your mind. You denied it at first, a silly thing to have a crush on someone you talked to for a few hours. Yet, his laughter echoed through your mind and you found yourself hoping. Hoping that by some miracle that somehow, in this massive city, you'd waltz into that coffee shop and see him again.

You weren't prepared for the day it happened though, nerves hitting your stomach like a tidal wave as you saw him through the window. The tall blonde sat near the large window, the sun hitting his golden locks in an almost ethereal glow as he thumbed through a large novel. It took all your courage to walk into the shop and start to order, your body wanting simultaneously to run away and towards him. Your mind whirled on what you would say if he actually did talk to you again, torn between a casual nod and "Hi, how are you" on the way to your table. 

His focus on his novel was broken immediately as he recognized your voice across the small cafe, placing his book down and making a split second decision as his body moved on its own. Just as quickly as you'd turned to find a place to sit, Kyojuro was standing a short distance ahead of you. You smiled warmly, a bit of panic washing over you as you tried to figure out what to say. He reciprocated with the smile that you had been daydreaming about constantly before speaking."I know this is very sudden, but if you're not busy would you do me the honor of joining me for coffee and a date later?" He asked gently, thanking every god he knew that you'd agreed on both parts of his question and joined him for a snowy date in the park. 

A small hum rumbled in his chest as he brought your hands closer, stamping a small kiss along the back of your hand. "Shall we get something hot to keep your hands warm? I admit, i usually don't wear gloves or i'd give you mine. But, coffee should help for a bit at least." He cooed, gently releasing your hands. He lead you to an open bench at the edge of the clearing, the sun having long melted off the snow off of it as he sat you down. He took the scarf from around his neck, twirling it loosely around yours as he smiled. "please, wear this for now to keep warm and i'll be right back with our beverages. Caramel, 2 creamers and 2 sugars right?" He asked, hoping that his memory was correct on how you liked your coffee. 

"You remembered that?" You smiled, adjusting the scarf for a snugger fit.

"I did, you ordered the same thing every time you needed a refill as we talked at the shop. I wanted to memorize it. i'll be right back" He smiled brightly, nodding as he walked over to the food stand to get drinks. You nestled your face into the borrowed scarf, the scent of cinnamon and his cologne flooding your senses as you hummed contently to yourself. Your face almost hurt from smiling so wide, a giddy feeling overcoming you as you sat alone for a moment with your thoughts. Your eyes transfixed on watching his every move, smirking as he made small talk with the clerk and your stomach fluttering as his addictive laugh echoed through the courtyard. You wondered if he was feeling the same way, free falling head over heels for him by the moment with every little thing he did. You watched him in quiet adoration, making a little squeaking sound into the scarf as his gaze fixed back on you and he gave a little wave as he waited. 

"Here you are, it's still a little warm so i'd let it cool slightly" He smiled, handing you the coffee as he popped the lid from his beverage open. A spicy aroma clung in the air as steam rolled off the top of his cup, a soft sigh leaving his lips as he placed his hands around the warm coffee cup.

"Spiced Chai?" You inquired, taking the top off your own cofee to let it cool just a bit.

"Mhmm! it's my favorite blend of tea! I love all the different spices in it, especially cinnamon!" He confirmed, breathing in a bit of the aroma with a delighted hum. 

"It's actually my favorite too" You smiled, finding just another reason to fall in love with him as he smiled brightly. 

A small breeze passed throught the tree branches above you, sending a small silvery snow shower down upon you both as you chatted about tea preferences. 

"well, that's one way to cool them down a little quicker!" He chuckled, reaching over to tuck in your scarf a little closer. 

"all the same, are you staying warm enough?" He asked gently, his hand lingering on the long part of the scarf for a moment before meeting your eyes. 

"I am, thanks to you. I appreciate the coffee and lending me your scarf" You cooed gently, taking a small sip of your coffee. It wasn't nearly as good as what the cafe makes, but for vendor coffee it was exactly how you like it.  

"What about you though, aren't you cold at all?"

"Actually, it's very rare that i get cold. My body has always run on the warmer side, it's almost like i'm running a low grade fever most of the time. Doctor's have told me that it's not harming me, still it does worry the nurses every time" He laughed lightly, nodding as he took a sip of the spicy tea"

"See, I'm the complete opposite. I'm almost always cold but i hardly feel it on my skin. I've just become accustomed to it, I start to feel 'feverish' if hit 99.0, my body just tends to run cold" You explained as you walked and talked down the snowy path back towards the park entrance. Your free hands had naturally drifted towards holding the other as you walked, a smile permanently etched into your expression as you felt nothing short of joy in the moment. 

"Even if that's so, I'm sure you still feel cold sometimes" he mused, lacing his fingers within yours as he looked up at the pair of cardinals singing in the tree above. 

"I do….but luckily I have someone here to keep me warm today" your murmur softly, pressing yourself closer to his side as you noticed the tips of his ears flush crimson and his grip on your hand tightened just slightly.  

His gaze moved from watching the birds in the distance to take in the beautiful sight at his side. The setting sun bathed your features in a soft orange glow, the feeling of your body huddled close to his own making his heart race in a way he'd not felt in a very long time. He'd never thought about someone this much, from the moment he woke up to the last thought at night, you were always on his mind ever since that day. He wondered silently if you felt the same way, if the connection he felt so strongly was reciprocated and this could turn into the first of many many dates to come. He didn't want the sun to set, the dying of the light taking the warmth of the sun and your calming presence at his side along with it as he would have let you go. He couldn't let this be the end, he wanted so many more days like this with you.

 

Even just one more date…one more and I'd be the luckiest man on earth

"I'd be happy to be here to keep you warm not just for today, but any day you feel cold. I'd be happy to warm you up...i-if that would be agreeable" He ventured, an uncharacteristic bashfulness in his tone as you smiled widely. First date jitters were normal, but in the time you'd known him he seemed like he oozed confidence in every aspect of his life. You would have never guessed someone so forward as Kyojuro would be stuttering over his words, let alone asking you informally for a second date.

"I-I'm always cold so….you might be in for a lot of work to keep me warm" you laugh lightly, squeezing his hand as you cuddled closer to his arm and stepped onto the subway platform. 

"I'll gladly accept that position" he cooed, smiling sweetly as you both stopped in front of the kiosk to check the train times. 

7 minutes, that's enough time to say goodbye I think

"I suppose… that I should get going soon" you mutter softly, a twinge of pain in your tone as you begin to slowly pull away from his side.

"Would it be ok to call you later, to make sure you made it home ok?" He asked, fighting against the sudden urge to wrap you in his arms and not let go. 

"I would like that, I can text you when I get home." You smile sweetly, trying to prolong holding his hand as long as possible as the announcement indicated your train was coming in 5 minutes.

"This was…really really nice Kyojuro. I really enjoyed our time together, thank you for everything. I'll talk to you soon then?" You cooed gently,giving his hand another squeeze before starting to walk away. You were stopped as you realized his hand had not let go of your own. You turned back to face him, his eyes glinting with a spark of determination as his cheeks flushed bright red.

"I... have question for you" he said softly, closing the distance between you in an instant as his other hand cupped your face gently.Your heart thumped wildly in your chest as his amber eyes lock with yours, the warmth of his body permeating through his jacket as he smiled lovingly. 

He pauses for a moment, taking time to sense any hesitation within your stance as his thumb caressed lightly over your cheek. Any fear he had dissolved as you brought your hand up to cover his own cradling your face, passing your thumb over the back of his hand with a smile. 

"yes?"

"May I?" He whispered softly, his warm breath ghosting over your lips for a moment before you give him your answer in the best way you knew how.Your lips connected softly at first, gently testing the waters as your body ignited in a rush of sparks. His hand lets go of yours at his side, wrapping around the small of your back as he slowly deepened the kiss. The world stopped at that moment, all noise fading to the background as he held you close. The bitter cold wind felt like nothing against your skin, repelled by the warmth of his embrace and his kiss that set your soul on fire. You were bewitched instantly, so much so that it was only because he pulled away that you came back down to earth long enough to know why he stopped. Your train rattled into the station, its doors opening with small hiss to let passengers off and take you to your home.

"I can…walk you to the train car" He offered, the look on his face saying everything his tone did not. His head felt like it was still swimming, overcome by the intoxicating feeling of your lips against his own and the feeling of you in his arms. He didn't want to let you go, he wanted to spend the rest of his waking hours by your side if possible, but he knew that this was your train and you had to go.

"I..uhm..w-would you like to come home with me for a while? I don't have any dinner plans yet, but I can cook for us? I-if you have plans that's ok, it's Saturday after all and I know work keeps you busy and-" the words flew out of your mouth quicker than you knew what you were saying, seemingly desperate to prolong your time together as you wished you didn't have to leave his warm embrace again. His lips connected with yours mid sentence, dissolving all other thoughts you had in an instant as he pulled back and nodded "I would be honored to join you, please lead the way~" he smiled lovingly, squeezing your hand lightly as you both headed for the train uptown. 

[muiiruii]

little things akaashi do when he loves you

akaashi keiji x fem! reader

fluff ; abstract ; compilation ; just hoping to put a smile to @luvbub face because it’s her birthday and i have been a long-time fan of her writings.

— akaashi has this little habit of linking your pinky with his whenever he wanted your attention at times. it wasn’t something he does often enough for him to notice himself, but you only realized after that one time he did not let go after getting your attention. you just let him hold your hand that way until he naturally laced the rest of his fingers with yours. since it was a cute habit that does not happen often, you like to keep it that way, as if it was a little surprise you can look forward to each time it happens.

— he finds himself easily lost in a daze whenever he watched you concentrate on the things you love doing. it could be times when you were whipping up something simple for breakfast, reading that one book you finally had the time for, knitting yet another sweater when he knew the scarf you initially worked on was not even complete yet, or just scrolling through your phone. it wasn’t until the sound of your laughter snapped him back as you chide him for staring at you again. akaashi could tell you were embarrassed to be under his gaze at times so he always apologized for it, but that doesn’t mean he would stop doing it though. he couldn’t help himself when you were like a breath of fresh air whenever he needed a break from his thoughts. and he finds it amusing at times when he was brought back to reality by a pillow you threw with a huff.

— even though akaashi tends to love through his actions more so than his words, there were times you wondered how he could say sweet nothings with ease and not feel embarrassed about it. “i don’t like the way i look in pictures.” you were scrolling through your photo albums one day and he, who was reading next to you, glanced down at the pictures you were busy editing. “you know why?” you looked up at him with a raised brow waiting for him to answer. “you know how the moon always looked beautiful in the night sky but our phones can never capture its beauty with our camera?” you nodded at his words, only to fully grasp what he meant a few minutes later. “yeah that’s why.” at times like this, he really knows how to tug on your heartstrings so effortlessly.

— they say when someone loves you, they love everything about you. and you know, somewhere deep within your heart, you wished it was true. because you knew there were times when the rough edges you tried to hide away will one day hurt the ones closest to you. yet, you forgot about how love is equivalent to that of growth. when they say they love everything about you, they meant they will love you through the changes. it wasn’t about loving you for who you are, but loving you even after what you will become. and that was the love akaashi seem to have for you. he would have moments where he just sat next to you in silence, giving you the space you need, but also reminding you that he will always there for you.

— the most wonderful and fantastic thing about akaashi is that he doesn’t just love you as his romantic partner. the little things he do for you that makes you laugh, it was like being in love with a friend. the little adventures he was willing to go with you, it was like being in love with the world. and especially those little things he do when he takes care of you and your family, it was like being in love with the idea of having your own family. that was the the kind of love he has when he’s with you.

[bonny-kookoo]

Home: Picturesque

Languages are marked as always: English | Korean

----

"Are you sure that's a good idea kook?" You ask, your hands on his shoulders as he shows you the pictures he wants included in the Twitter post.

"Of course!" He eagerly answers, opening them up again for you to see. "Just look-" he starts, fawning over the images yet again. They're close ups of certain moments with you, edited in a noir-like color scheme. A picture of you looking away from him for example; laid out on the ground with your legs up against a wall, one of your boot's laces undone and hanging down, while there's a butterfly right on the tip of your shoe. You remember that day; a rare day off spent at a secluded spot somewhere in Seoul, where you've enjoyed just a moment together, before someone would eventually recognize him. Then there's another image of you, wearing one of his jackets and a scarf, eyes wide open and breath easily visible in the cold air.

"Its hard to imagine that that's me." You chuckle, as you look at the next photo. Your holding your body up just with your arms, legs dangling above ground while you peek over the fence a little to look at something behind it you don't remember. You didn't even notice him taking this picture at all- just like you didn't notice the next; your legs resting over his lap, while his inked hand lays on your knee. You can recognize the seats as the backstage area of one of his concerts- however the specific country or location isn't there in your memory anymore. He's also taken an image of your shadows- a cliche picture of his hand holding yours, your shadow pointing at something while turned to the side, while his clearly holds his phone in his free hand. The difference in hight is clear here- just like the location, Japanese characters on the street easily recognizable by now.

"Its how I see you." He explains after a moment. "Those details. Look-" he clicks back to the first. "The zipper of your shoe has been broken ever since I've known you. But you still wear this pair wherever we go it seems." He chuckles. "Or here-" he clicks to another. "You always look so cute when you're surprised. And this-" he excitedly brings up another. "You're so strong, even if you don't see it. You always pull of stunts like this effortlessly." He grins up at you from where he sits in his chair.

"I guess.." you shrug. "But don't you think the fans-" You start, and he shakes his head.

"The fans like you. And even if they don't; no one can deny that those photos are stunning. Which- yeah let's include this one too." He mumbles, adding another one.

One you easily remember.

"Thats.." you start, and his hand slowly moves up to lay on the one you have on his shoulder, thumb running over your skin.

"The day I confessed. Behind the convenience store." He says fondly. Your face isn't in it- you're yet again looking away from him, seemingly talking, while holding a steaming cup of tea. You've got one leg crossed, the other one stretched out a little; the sole of your shoe resting against the sole of his own way bigger shoes. "I honestly didn't know if you'd come back after I'd say it. So I tried sneaking pictures of you to remember at least." He says quietly.

"Jungkook.." you start, and he simply leans his cheek on his hand that's ontop of yours on his shoulder.

"I really am grateful- I don't think I show or say it often enough." He confesses. "You're so strong, pulling through it all, never complaining, always so.. understanding of everything. I'm lucky I've found you." He says.

You simply lean over after a moment, clicking around for the right button before its done- sent out into the world, but yiu don't want to see the reactions yet. You simply tab the button of his screen, turning it off, before you walk around the chair to sit on his lap, hugging him tightly.

"Im just as lucky." You tell him, and he squeezes you a little at those words, Thinking that maybe, it's time to think about the future- and how he wants to ask you for the next step in life.

Because there's no one else he'd rather spend the rest of his life with.

[scribeoffate]

Oh, oh, could I ask for First family Christmas, so it's the first time Isaac spends xmas with Brett (and Satomi and Lori and the rest?) pls

Isaac grips the handle of his bag. It's filled with packages wrapped in glittering red and green paper.

"You're gonna have a great time," Scott reassures him as he drives the jeep off the road onto a train in the Preserve you wouldn't notice if you didn't already know it was there.

Strains of Silver Bells play on the radio, and Isaac hums along. It's been years since he's been invited to a family Christmas.

Memories of the last time his family had been intact for the holidays flit through his head as the jeep rumbles along the path. Scott sings off tune to the song on the radio and Isaac thinks about Camden belting "Jinge Bells, Isaac Smells" at the top of his lungs while his mom told him to stop.

His dad had been distant, but loving then and hadn't protested when Isaac climbed into his lap. Camden had thrust a present at him, a kind of apology. A first edition Batman comic.

Scott pulls in front of Satomi's house and grabs his own bag of gifts from the back of the jeep.

Brett waves at him from the sprawling porch covered in mismatched furniture. Some of it even looks like it might be meant for outdoors. He catches a glimpse of Lori from the window and her friend Tierney.

He's nervous as he and Scott step inside.

Scott hands Satomi the bag of gifts with a little bow and she smiles fondly.

"Thank you, Scott. And for bringing Isaac." She hands him yet another bag of gifts. "For the children at the hospital."

Scott grins. "Thank you." And he pulls Satomi into a hug. She blushes and laughs and tells Scott that he's going to give an old woman a heart attack.

Isaac stands awkwardly, watching until Brett finds him and steers him to a towering Christmas tree, beside a menorah and Buddhist shrine.

"One of the smaller kids asked about Hanukkah this year," Brett says with a shrug, "Satomi's response was to teach him about it. If a small bundle of energy starts babbling to you about Maccabees just smile and nod."

Isaac swallows and sets his bag under the tree.

Brett grabs his hand with a small smile as soon as it's free. It's warm, and Isaac doesn't want to let go, even to hang up his coat and hat, and scarf.

Brett kisses him once in what he calls the coat room.

Jiang catches them and pats Brett on the shoulder. "Congratulations. You finally found someone to put up with your bullshit."

Isaac opens his mouth to defend Brett's honor, but Brett just smiles and punches Jiang back. "C'mon we don't want to miss dinner."

Dinner is a plethora of dishes from around the world. Brett helps Isaac with his chopsticks, and some of the smaller kids groan, moan and make kissy noises at them.

Satomi smiles, and Isaac feels warm in a way he hasn't at Christmas in years.

Satomi's pack is full and vibrant, and after dinner, the kids are allowed to open gifts first. The five small ones babble excitedly about the dreidels they all get from a young boy who looks so proud of himself.

There are thoughtful presents and gift cards, and Brett smirks when Lori opens a lump of coal. She sticks her tongue out at him, and he laughs when his gift from her is a different lump of coal.

Isaac watches his face, the way the tree lights glow against his skin. He barely notices when Brett places a package in his hands.

Isaac's heart flutters as he peels away the paper to reveal a soft, silk scarf. It's a deep maroon with the letters "IL and BT" awkwardly embroidered on each end. The stitches are shaky and off-center, and Isaac feels like he must be glowing.

"This is... it's too much," he murmurs.

Brett shrugs. "Satomi said it would help me with my anger. It did help."

Isaac hands Brett his gift, a little lacrosse keychain. It's not nearly as thoughtful.

Brett seems to love it anyways. He clips it to his keyring as Isaac wraps the scarf around his neck.

He cuddles close to Brett and leans his head on his shoulder as the pack continues to open gifts, laugh, and joke. He feels soft and warm and tingly.

He feels happy.

Satomi winks at him before pulling one of the children onto her lap along with the book he'd just unwrapped.

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