#Each of them is like 10 pixels tall

[caguaydreams]

Little doodles from class today

[cattimeswithjellie]

Stream Recap, ImpulseSV, 6/12/24

((If you caught the excerpt from this I posted last night, you may be ready for the wildness that is this stream recap. I started out expecting a build stream and wound up recapping a Hermit social gathering for two hours, lol. It's all right though, because it was very, very funny.))

2:55 Impulse opens the stream on studio view. He asks if his streaming setup still works and jokes he needs to get the dust off it. He shares that he has been gone because he’s been sick, and decides he should probably just start tacking a few extra sick days onto the end of each vacation because it happens every time. (Except in Michigan, Chat points out.) Chat tells him his voice sounds better now than in the video. He says he’ll see how he feels as the stream goes on. He talks a little about PixelPulse Valley, how he named it because he likes being in the valley in Phoenix and likes valleys in general. Chat makes a joke about valley girls. Impulse has been sick almost a whole week and it is gross, especially since he’s had to travel.

6:00 Impulse shouts out to Noah in chat, who is someone he met in person on the cruise ship. Apparently there were several Impulse-in-the-wild spottings on this trip. He thanks subs and donos. He reminds chat that a Big Video came out today, one that he’s been waiting to show for awhile. He finally gets to tell the story of PixelPulse Valley and its battle with the AIs, and the basics of what the game is going to be like. Impulse doesn’t want to go too deep here because he doesn’t want to spoil the video, but he will be working on some stuff in the city. He suggests that maybe chatters might want to catch at least part of the video before joining the stream. Today he’ll be working on the secret tunnel and hopes for a normal-length stream. Chat sings the SECRET TUNNEL song.

9:50 Chat is worried about Impulse staying hydrated. He assures Chat he has been triple-fisting coffee, juice and water. Chat is unsure about the phrasing but happy that Impulse is getting enough to drink. It is impossible to bother Skizz during stream today because Skizz is at work, and when he gets home from work they are going to record the podcast.

11:00 Impulse shows off his new redstone door. He apologizes to RKF Walter, whose name he messed up while crediting him for the door design. It is a beautiful door design and opens to an exploding flight rocket. He drops down the escape hole and shows Chat the Secret Tunnel. He says he’s gotten lots of good suggestions in the video comments already for different ambiance touches. He is not sure yet what he’s going to change, if anything. He shows off how covering a pearlescent froglight with a trapdoor turns the light pure white.

14:10 Impulse highlights the wall lights. He is happy because there are not many chances for subtle design touches that are only a few pixels tall in Minecraft. He contemplates how he’s going to mute when he inevitably starts coughing. He reveals that his favorite DCI team is Impulse, of course. It’s where all his branding came from! (Blue Devils is also good). DCI is Drum Corps International, professional marching band with no woodwinds. He toured the country for a whole summer with the Impulse team back in the day. Chat is excited about this Impulse Lore. Impulse’s girlfriend back in the day (not his wife now) was a clarinet player, but she played cymbals on the drumline.

18:00 Impulse notices that all the trapdoors have completely oxidized and wonders who has been keeping it loaded. Probably Joel, he concludes as he cleans and waxes them. Chat suggests it might also be people coming by to use the XP bank. Impulse agrees that the XP bank is popular, way more popular than he and Skizz anticipated. He may have to put in some more at other Hermits’ bases, just to lighten the load on Bop n’ Go. Chat suggests putting XP banks inside the volcano once it is hollowed out. He likes that plan.

21:00 Chat asks if Impulse saw Tango’s video that had the naturally volcano-shaped Magic Mountain clone. Impulse didn’t see it. Chat asks what he plans to do about the slime chunk in the tunnel. Impulse does not know. He doesn’t want to put carpet in. He’s not too worried because big slimes are unlikely to spawn, and he doesn’t want to slab it and change the tunnel shape. He’ll wait and see how bad it is. He decides to start the next segment of tunnel with the bottom wall edges and gathers his supplies.

23:40 It was easier to record video sick than to stream sick, because he could gather energy for short bursts of talking. Chat asks for advice on visiting DCI events. Impulse says check out the vendors to find cool music supplies, and also bring lots of sunscreen. He does not have enough cyan terracotta. He considers whether anyone sells terracotta, then remembers he’s not buying from Big T. He begins laying out his pattern. Ren messages in chat that he needs Impulse’s brain. Impulse doesn’t promise his brain is working, but goes to find Ren at his base. As he flies, Impulse talks about playing Wordle at Pearl’s yesterday and how he struggled because his brain was foggy. He likes Wordle but he did not do well. ((It did take Impulse more than 20 minutes to solve the puzzle at Dyeductions on Pearl’s 6/11 stream, compared to 10 minutes for Skizz.))

26:30 He touches down at Ren’s base and asks where Ren is, Ren tells him he must come into the truck. Impulse asks if he should be recording. Ren says he can if he wants, and he probably should too. They both reveal that they are streaming. Impulse tries to find his way into the truck with little success. Ren directs him to the door on top and describes the lever. Impulse finds the lever but it doesn’t work. They are having some audio issues due to Ren’s setup. Impulse plasters himself against the front windshield and breaks into the truck, to Ren’s great consternation. Impulse replaces the broken glass and assures Ren he is a certified repair technician. Ren accepts this and moves on.

29:00 Ren tells Impulse he needs his brain, then uses the classic girlfriend tactic of telling Impulse he’s been waiting for him to notice something. Impulse is immediately on the back foot and tries to fall back on the defense of having been gone. He guesses that Ren has a new outfit, which is true. Ren demands that Impulse look at him. Ren has a new skin on, including a spacesuit and a face that Chat thinks is very similar to Beef’s (which is true.) He has a beard and everything. Impulse says the outfit reminds him of Terra Swoop Force at MCC. Ren admits that is true. He says his chat thinks the glasses are too much. Impulse’s Chat thinks they’re great. Impulse and Ren both take off their glasses. Impulse has no eyebrows without the glasses. He says he plucks his eyebrows when he gets nervous and it’s been a rough week. Ren puts the glasses and beard back on, and shows off the handsome touches of gray in his hair. They talk about getting IRL haircuts. Ren is going back to facecam streaming and told his barber he needed a good haircut for an important meeting. He wanted a side shave, but his barber told him his head is too large for a side shave. Impulse thinks Ren has a nice head and hopes the barber didn’t hurt his feelings. Ren says the barber did a good job. Big-headed folk in chat commiserate with Ren.

33:30 Ren says he listens to the advice of professionals about how he looks, because he has no understanding of fashion or how he is supposed to look. Impulse admits he hasn’t got Ren’s stream up and can’t see how he looks, Ren admits that he hasn’t dared to turn the facecam on yet. Ren compliments how nice Impulse looks every time he streams and thinks it must take him a long time to get ready, but Impulse denies that. He does his hair once a week, puts glue in it, and is careful about how he sleeps. His wife is the closest thing to a stylist he has. She cut his hair for him for a long time. Ren talks about the value in learning a single hairstyle by muscle memory and doing it exactly the same everyday forever. Impulse agrees and tells a story about his vacation, where he couldn’t take his regular hair product. His hair was a mess his whole trip. Ren is very sympathetic. Chat thinks Impulse has bougie hair.

37:30 Ren is jealous because Impulse has a nicely-shaped head and can shave his hair off. Ren’s head is weird-shaped at the back and he has a mole, so he would look terrible if he shaved his head. He asks Impulse if he’d ever wear a toupee if he started going bald. Impulse says his dad is 70 and has a full head of hair, but he doesn’t think he’d be a combover guy. He’d probably do some kind of filler. Hopefully by that time there will be a pill or cream to grow hair. Chat is telling Impulse that the baldness gene comes down on the maternal side. Impulse reassures them that his mom also has hair. Ren says his mom is a Yeti, with very thick hair. Chat reminds Impulse that Rogaine is a thing. Ren shows off his boots, Impulse is impressed. He tells Ren that his Lore dropped today, and that it’s going to tickle Ren in all the right places. Ren is eager to see it. Impulse did make a mistake by tackling the biggest, hardest game first, and it is taking forever. Ren thinks maybe that was the right way to go, since it will regulate the size and speed of the other games.

41:00 Ren suddenly detects an INTRUDER at the truck. He shows Impulse where the actual door is and shoots a rocket at Pearl, who is standing just outside. She makes an indignant noise. Ren tells her that the oxygen out there is poisonous and full of spores, so she jumps down inside and asks Ren if he stream sniped her. Impulse also wants to know how Ren spotted Pearl. Ren says he saw the nametag through the ceiling. Pearl immediately compliments Ren on his new look. Impulse is chagrined at her superior powers of perception. He says this happens in real life with his wife too. Ren sits in the cockpit with Pearl and tells Pearl the whole embarrassing story of Impulse’s visit.

43:00 Pearl points out that she is good at seeing details, that she noticed right away that Iskall had a haircut earlier in the season. “Iskall had a haircut?” Ren asks. Pearl describes Iskall’s haircut test. Ren says there’s something different about Pearl too. Impulse says she looks older. They sing Happy Birthday to her while chasing her through the truck while she flees. She is embarrassed but thanks them. She asks Impulse for a thing. He doesn’t understand for a minute, but Chat does and helps out. Impulse provides the Birthday You-Yo. Chat celebrates. Pearl tells him he sounds better today than he did yesterday. They talk about getting sick on vacation and at cons. Pearl digs around in Ren’s shulker boxes. Ren objects, not very strenuously, and she tells him it’s her job. They point out it’s not the job of the postmaster to clean up messes, and the Cleaning Lady was Season 9. Apparently once a Cleaning Lady, always a Cleaning Lady.

46:00 Impulse asks if they have the shulker mod that shows what’s in the boxes. They do not. Impulse explains his retexture woes anyway. Someone drops a cake into the truck through the door for Pearl. Pearl suspects it was False. She sets down the cake just in time for Invisible False to pearl into the truck. Impulse and False give Pearl birthday punches, or False does while Impulse fails to punch. He blames his short arms. Ren comes back and puts a single candle on the cake and they all wish Pearl a happy first birthday. She says she doesn’t feel so old now. Pearl is not hungry enough to eat, so Ren and False give her more birthday punches. Birthday punches are not very effective when someone is wearing netherite armor. “Punch harder!” Pearl yells as she removes her netherite. Ren “punches” her with an axe. “Not that hard, not that hard!” she corrects, running away. She makes a wish and knocks the candle off the cake, then eats a bit. Ren asks what she wished, but she won’t tell or it won’t come true. He realizes that’s been his mistake all along.

49:00 Pearl eats most of the cake, then offers her friends a slice. Ren sets himself on fire to be hungry enough to eat. This alarms his friends. He finishes off the cake. They discuss the awkward IRL situation of one slice of cake left on the plate. None of them will eat it unless no one is watching and the party is nearly over. Ren asks if Pearl’s had a good birthday so far, but she points out that it is 2:48 in the morning, Pearl time, so there has not been much birthday yet. Ren asks if she has had cake anyway. Pearl says she doesn’t have a cake yet. She asks if they know that heated mousepads exist. False wants one immediately, Impulse wants the exact opposite of that. He tells them that the high in Phoenix today is 43 degrees Celsius (109 F). Nobody likes that. Chat is horrified. Pearl says no wonder he got sick, with that temperature change. Apparently it was 6 degrees in Alaska. (43 F) False said it was 15 (59 F) today in the UK. Ren has been keeping his eye on the prize and is still upset that Pearl doesn’t have IRL cake. Pearl promises that she’s going to have dinner with her family and she’ll get cake then, and she also had a strawberry doughnut.

54:10 There have been lots of Hermit birthdays recently. False and Gem both had birthdays recently, and someone else that they can’t remember. Chat knows it was Skizz. Pearl remembers Skizz, and Cleo as well. Ren thinks next year they need a birthday hall for the month of June. Pearl and False think about horoscope-themed buildings, with a really big one for Gemini. Ren thinks there’s another big batch in October, but it’s really just him. Chat points out that Geminis are born entertainers. Ren claims Bdubs as an October birthday. He reminisces about turning False’s base into a cake way, way back in Season 4. Pearl points out that as of today, the minimum Hermit age is 28. They are all getting old. Ren says they need a special celebration for when the minimum age hits 30. Impulse agrees and says they can hand out walkers to everyone. Ren suggests ear trumpets as well, while False suggests giant keyboards.

59:00 Impulse doesn’t realize how they got back to this topic when he and Ren were just talking earlier about losing their hair. False said she was listening, and educates Impulse on the existence of little tubs one can put one’s hair gel into for traveling. It takes Impulse a minute, but he figures out what she’s talking about. He says that’s a lot of work. False tells Pearl she’s a bit concerned for these guys. Pearl agrees and says they need Bdubs the hairdresser. False tries to sell them on the beneifts of long hair, but Pearl reminds her that it took her an entire day to find a bottle of hairspray in Michigan. Impulse fondly remembers the days when he used to shave his head so he wouldn’t have to do anything with it. He reiterates his story about only styling his hair once a week and using glue. False and Pearl are disgusted. He admits that is a slight exaggeration. Pearl suggests Impulse has a Lego haircut. Ren thinks Impulse just sleeps in the chair in his office and has his wife wake him up to stream. Pearl says this is why not having a facecam is the best option. Ren seems like he might be reconsidering his decision to facecam.

1:02:20 False starts teasing Ren about not uploading his VODs. Ren protests that he managed to upload a VOD just today. Impulse brags that it’s easy when you have two copies of OBS. The others are skeptical of this solution. False says no wonder it’s 40 degrees there, Impulse’s computer is on fire. Ren admires the teleprompter setup in Impulse’s office. Impulse says he likes it because staring at Chat makes them uncomfortable. Chat agrees. False stares deep into Chat’s eyes on all three streamers’ channels. They talk a little more about streaming setups. Ren declares Impulse the “smorterest” of the streamers. Impulse admits he needs to run an entire tech checklist to go live.

1:05:30 With all other conversational topics exhausted, the group decides to talk about food. Pearl is baffled that Impulse and Ren don’t like jam doughnuts. Ren clarifies that he doesn’t dislike jam doughnuts. Impulse says he doesn’t like being surprised by, like, banana doughnuts. Ren agrees and adds lime as a possibility. Pearl is horrified and says they need better doughnuts. Ren really wants to try an American Cinnabon. False tries to tell him they have Cinnabon in the UK. “Not like that,” Ren tells her. Pearl asks if any of them tried the salt doughnuts in Michigan. False and Impulse say no, Pearl says it was “really interesting” and “oddly enjoyable.” She recommends them, especially with the chicken salt she brought along. Ren is confused at “chicken salt on a doughnut.” Chat is confused by “chicken salt.” False says she’s going to salt a doughnut and complain to Pearl when it tastes bad. Pearl sputters for a minute, then demands to know whether any of them thought she was actually serious about salt doughnuts. Ren says she’s Australian, and Australians eat weird stuff. It seemed plausible. Pearl tells them she’s just Mission Possible’d all of them, that her mission was to convince them all that she’d already told them a story about something and that they’d just forgotten. Ren congratulates her, Impulse feels violated. Ren and chat are still hung up on the chicken salt thing. Pearl wonders suddenly if maybe she did it wrong, because she actually convinced them they were there for the story happening, not that they’d heard it before. They agree it counts.

1:11:00 False is a little sad that she can’t have a salted doughnut. Pearl demands to know how they can hate Vegemite and want salted doughnuts. False says Vegemite is too fishy. Pearl is mortally insulted. Impulse confirms it was Marmite and not Vegemite on the wings in Michigan. Vegemite and Marmite are similar but not the same. Ren asks if he really has to go all the way to Australia to taste Vegemite. Pearl slaps him and tells him if he actually comes to an event, she will bring him Vegemite. Impulse shills TwitchCon San Diego but Ren demurs, saying he can’t afford it. San Diego is very expensive. Pearl understands, she spent 5 grand for 5 days in Michigan. False says she might be out too, then. Impulse invites them all to stay with him and they’ll make the six hour drive each day to the con. Ren asks how much it costs to get one of those Scarbots to roll around the convention. Pearl says that if any of them want to come to Australia, they can stay at her place. Ren has family in Australia. They discuss Vegemite some more. Impulse didn’t like it on first bite, but sort of got the idea of why people might like it after a few bites. More Vegemite talk. Impulse sidebars to chat that he has no idea what he is doing, and that he has a tunnel to build. Chat assures him that they are happy and he should stay.

1:18:00 Ren mentions black pudding. Impulse asks the group what’s the weirdest thing they’ve ever eaten. Pearl says cow’s tongue. Impulse says he once went to a fancy restaurant in French Polynesia and didn’t know what he was eating. Later he looked it up and saw it was duck liver. It was really good. False admits she doesn’t know if she has a good answer for this question. Vegemite, she decides. Pearl smacks her. Ren says he likes everything he’s eaten except oysters, but the weirdest thing he’s eaten was a Mopane Worm in South Africa, a big caterpillar that gets deep fried. Pearl asks if they tasted like chicken, he says they taste like peanuts with an earthy aftertaste that is not nice. Impulse pushes False for a better answer; she says she almost ate crocodile once but the kitchen was closed. She says she once ate a weird fruit with a bad smell, she thinks it was durian. But also Vegemite. Pearl smacks her again. Chat is vouching for durian: smells bad, tastes great. Impulse says escargot is pretty good, mushroomy. Ren says escargot also has an earthy aftertaste, and the others begin teasing him about why everything tastes like dirt to him. Ren asks if none of them ate dirt as children. Pearl says she once ate a daisy. She decides to change her answer for “weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten.”

1:22:45 Pearl decides to get her Mission Possible book to make sure everyone agrees she succeeded the task. She blasts out the roof of the truck. Impulse decides to investigate the door to try and figure out why the lever didn’t work for him when he tried it. He clicks the lever and the door opens. He hits it again and the door closes, just in time for Ren to smash his head into it and visually clip through the roof. Chat is deeply amused. False and Ren are impressed on the timing of that. False realizes that if someone clicks the lever from inside, the lever outside doesn’t work. Ren is ashamed of his terrible redstone, but False says it’s good to have a door lock he can activate from inside. Impulse is just happy to know that he wasn’t the crazy one, even if he was the one who broke in through the windshield. He and False examine the decorations of the roof. Impulse is disappointed to know that they are still polluting the planet in the futuristic future.

1:25:00 Pearl returns and reads her task to the group. They agree that she completed the task in a way that is even better than was asked for, since she convinced Impulse that he was actually present for the story that never happened. They all fly to MP HQ to watch Pearl spin. False tells them that Skizz broke the machine when he spun, so she didn’t get anything on her spin. But it’s fixed now. Pearl collects her token and spins the wheel. She gets the Sword, which is a hat that looks like she’s got a diamond sword stuck in her head. The others pretend to pull it out. Impulse makes a Sword in the Stone joke. Ren says that Pearl’s brain is too dense to get the sword out. Pearl smacks him, but Impulse tries to convince her it’s a compliment. She is skeptical, but Ren is all in.

1:28:40 Grian logs in, tells everyone in chat “Just so you know, I’m off to play badminton,” then logs out. They decide that this is a clear case of FOMO. Impulse asks if that’s the game with the birdie. False scoffs and corrects “Shuttlecock.” Pearl confirms he’s thinking of the right game. They talk about Badminton for a few minutes. Impulse says that badminton is not really a thing in America; they play pickleball instead. Everyone is baffled. He tries to explain it. Pearl asks if it’s the game with the long stick and a tiny racket on the end ((possibly lacrosse?)) Impulse says no, but that’s it’s very popular. Ren says it’s a ridiculous name and needs to be changed. Impulse demands to know how they can call something a shuttlecock and think they have the high ground for naming anything. Ren says it’s just mini tennis. He has an idea. Hermitcraft table tennis Olympics, five day round-robin event. They’d sell out a stadium. False and Pearl are deeply skeptical. Impulse thinks they should play basketball. Doc and Mumbo against each other, Impulse vs. Bdubs, etc. Pearl says she wants to play against Skizz. Impulse is very into this idea now. Ren asks diffidently what the rules are. Impulse assures him it’s just regular street ball. Ren has never played basketball. He played NBA Jam on Sega. He asks if he’s allowed to SuperDunk. False and Pearl discuss Dodgeball. Ren wants to play Pool, so nobody gets hot and sweaty. False suggests Bowls. Ren and Pearl are very enthusiastic about the idea. Impulse is baffled. “Are you saying balls?” he asks. “BOWLS,” Ren corrects hastily. Chat is amused. Ren tells False she can never call him inappropriate again. She slaps him a couple times and calls him the guy who’s never played basketball instead.

1:35:40 Ren explains bowls to Impulse, taking exquisite care to pronounce “BOWLS” each time. Chat tells Impulse it’s bocce ball. Pearl also experience pronunciation problems with bowls. Ren asks if they’ve ever played croquet, everyone says they have. Ren excitedly suggests to Pearl that they could play cricket. Impulse is not sure how it’s played, Pearl and False tell him it’s like rounders and wickets, which is unhelpful. Impulse starts feeling like he’s in a fever dream. Pearl goes to get her new mission, but she’s not going to read it out loud. False gets a mission too. Ren already has a mission. Impulse steps up to get a mission, but the game is empty. It’s very disappointing. Ren thinks this might be an excellent opportunity to do his mission. Impulse asks if it was Ren’s mission to get him to say “balls,” because if so, he won. Ren asks if the missions all have to be secret. False says most of them are all “do something or say something without the person knowing.” She says Ren could never be a good secret agent.

1:40:30 Pearl’s chat is begging her to ask Ren and False to play Wordle. Impulse thinks it’s a great idea. False demands that Ren close his chat so they don’t cheat for him. Impulse asks Chat if they want to go watch. Chat very much wants to watch. Impulse played yesterday and already knows the word, but he was not streaming so Chat will only know the word if they watched Pearl’s stream (or read the exhaustive recap.) Pearl takes them all down into the basement, where she has been building the locker room to hold inventories. False asks if a locker room means they’re going to die. Pearl says she hasn’t installed that yet. She cleans up a little buit while False and Ren read the rules and empty their inventories. Impulse turns off his facecam and goes to have a bio break while Pearl, Ren and False entertain the chat.

1:43:00 Pearl explains the game to False and Ren. It’s very much like Wordle, but there are no repeated letters and all the letter tiles are named dyes and flowers. Impulse comes back and watches along with Chat. False and Ren try to decide a starter word. Ren tries to think of a five letter word that is just vowels. He decides to play “BEAUT” and Pearl agrees this is a word because she is Australian. He gets one letter, in the wrong place.

1:48:00 Time for Round 2. Ren thinks there are eight vowels. He gets straighened out and decides he needs a word with I and O. He decides on “OINKS.” Pearl says that’s okay, so long as he doesn’t mind sacrificing a choice. Ollie Orionsound raids into the stream. Ollie’s chat tells Impulse he was playing Among Us, Impulse is very excited. He misses Among Us so much and wants to play it again. Ollie says he will let Impulse know if they run it back Ren gets one letter in the right place.

1:52:00 Ren tries to think of a third word. Pearl tells False she’ll switch the word after Ren plays so False gets a good play too. False says no thank you. She suggests to Ren that he might do well with a pen and paper. Impulse tells Chat he knows this stream is a bit scuffed, but he’s been gone and he missed his friends. He will get back to building soon. Chat is not actually in any hurry to get back to building. Ren plays “FILED” and gets none correct. Pearl realizes that he should have gotten some right and asks if the game has broken for the first time. She is worried until Ren realizes that although he showed off his guess on the item frames, he did not actually feed his guess into the game. He wasted a guess by not putting in any letters. He places the letters into the hoppers and runs the word again. Three letters lock into place, the other two are correct and in the wrong place.

1:55:30 Ren realizes there is literally only one option given the board state and plays “FIELD.” He gets the win condition. Everyone cheers! Ren tells Impulse he could’ve given him a hint that he had the letters reversed. Pearl admits she laughed when Ren decided to play Filed and not Field. Ren cleans up the supplies and puts them away, then resets the game. False definitely does not want to play, but she thinks the game is great. They discuss Wordle strategy and starter words. Impulse uses TRACE or SOUND for most of his starters, Ren thinks ADEIU would be good to get the vowels out. Pearl debates options for getting the last missing letters into the game. The game can handle the whole alphabet, but she doesn’t have enough dyes for every consonant without retexturing.

2:01:50 Pearl asks if Ren got a prize. He says yes, it had flowers and dyes. She says yes, that’s what they all have. Ren was not paying attention and makes Pearl rehash the “Why not all the letters” discussion. False suggests retexturing new, fake dyes. Pearl is ambivalent. Everyone is very impressed by Pearl’s work making the game. Impulse says she’s definitely a redstoner now, and he likes how she left it visible under the copper grates. Pearl tells Ren about the randomizer she spent four hours building yesterday, just to make sure nobody could get any hints. Other than tiny tweaks, the game is fully done and tested. Ren says there’s one thing missing: an ender chest. If hermits are going to pay, they need a chest! Impulse takes advantage of the new chest to play some horns. Pearl is going to put up a leaderboard with books so Hermits can keep track of their own streaks. Ren says Impulse is going to dominate because he plays so much Wordle. False says they need to let the old folks win some games. Ren suggests a timed version of the game, much to Impulse and False’s horror. Impulse wants a version where he can make a guess, go build for awhile, come back and guess again, etc. Pearl will make the game harder if everybody wins all the time. Ren suggests a hard mode to the game. Pearl thinks it’s doable, except it will take a _lot_ of work. Impulse feels her redstoner pain. Ren suggests an ultra-hard-mode that is just Pearl singing a countdown song and saying random words the entire time.

A suggestion about playing “BALLS” as the guess leads to an explanation of why there cannot be double letters. Ren suggests audio recording of various useful information to appear at different times in the game, like Xisuma’s TCG setup in Season 9. They brainstorm ways this could work.

2:17:00 Pearl does a little troubleshooting of the system and plays the fail sounds so they can hear it. It’s very funny. False says she should make the losers feel worse. Pearl points out that anyone who fails can pay another diamond to try again. Ren and Pearl are ending their streams, but Impulse has only placed about seven blocks today and needs to get some work done. He realizes he never did figure out what Ren wanted his brain for. Ren admits he just wanted to show off his new skin. False examines the new skin and points out the shape on the back. There is an arrow pointing to Ren’s butt. Impulse makes a suggestion that might be more risque than he intended. Chat is very amused. Pearl and False think Ren’s new skin without the glasses look like Beef, XB and Sausage. Impulse says he’s a meat lover’s pizza, a little Beef and a little Sausage. Ren says the skin will not have a tail because while he wants to be a dog, he doesn’t want to be a furry. There is a brief conversation about whether the coccyx counts as a tail. Ren decides to flee.

2:22:20 Impulse decides to head home. He says hello again to chat. This stream was supposed to be super-productive and he wants to get at least something done today. He drops back into the tunnel and sings the Secret Tunnel song, then tells Chat about the tunnel lore. He places five blocks and gets attacked by a baby zombie. He gathers more torches to light up the nearby caves. He says they may change the name of the city to DoublePulse valley, after him and Bdubs both. Neither of them are written into the story, but the city can still be named after them.

2:26:00 Impulse notes that he got so distracted that his Spotify finished the stream-safe playlist and went on to play other music. This VOD may not be monetizable. Ren raids into the stream. Impulse places one row of blocks, then starts talking to chat. A chatter asks how he feels about ducks. He is good with ducks. A chatter tells him to Google Bulk Bronson, a wrestler who looks like Impulse. Impulse can see it a little bit. He places some more blocks and talks about his vacation. 15 days ago he went to Seattle with his whole family, spent a couple days there, then went on an Alaskan cruise.

2:30:00 Impulse talks about vacation. The first day they went to the space needle and, on Scar’s recommendation, the MoPOP Museum. Everyone was wearing Pearl Jam shirts, and he didn’t realize why until later when he learned there was a Pearl Jam concert that same night, in walking distance of the hotel. He debated paying scalper prices to go to the concert, but then didn’t. He regretted not doing it. They went on the glass floor of the Space Needle. Impulse is afraid of heights so it was a little intense. Impulse didn’t get a chance to meet up with Scar or Fwhip while he was in town. Pike’s Place Fish Market was a disappointment, they do not throw the fish anymore.

2:37:10 A skeleton attacks Impulse, he tracks down where it came from to mobproof. At the hotel bar on the first night in Seattle, one of the bartenders asked Impulse if he was a gaming YouTuber. The bartender said the front desk guy recognized him. This was funny because Impulse was talking on the podcast the other week about how he never got noticed outside of cons. The cruise left on a Friday morning, headed for Alaska. It was a nice ship, a big ship, with an overwhelming amount of food. After the first couple of nights he felt sick from too much food and they stopped doing reserved dinner. There was a lot of food.

2:40:50 It took the ship two days at sea to reach Alaska. On those days, they found activities on the ship. There was a volleyball competition with one group of very skilled players who dominated everyone. Impulse’s youngest daughter plays volleyball and was very into it, so they went to watch. A guy at the tournament recognized Impulse and asked if he was Impulse. (That was Noah from the beginning of the stream.) Later they were going around the ship and there was a thing where they hide ducks on the ship. Kids can look for the ducks. Impulse’s daughter was looking for ducks, walking every level of the ship, every nook and cranny. It was a big walk. They went into a music hall to re-hide a duck she found, and while they were in there a kid approached Impulse and asked if he was Impulse. That was Colin from Tennessee, and he was very polite. Impulse’s daughter is 12 and now she thinks her dad is famous. Chat thinks Impulse is famous too. Another day went by on the cruise. Impulse and his family were going home from the pool, waiting for the elevator. Cruise ship elevators are slow, so eventually they decided to take the stairs. They went down four flights, and Impulse heard a little commotion of girls giggling above them. A woman stuck her head over the banister and asked “Are you a YouTuber? My daughters want to know.” Impulse was like “Yup.” So he met a mom and a couple of teens in the stairwell and took a picture. Impulse’s wife did not know what to do. She heard them yell “Impulse” at the top of the stairs, but she didn’t stop. It was maybe a little weird for her. Impulse’s daughter thought it was the best, though. Impulse suspects it might be because he was wearing his Life Series hoodie. He decided to stop wearing it, but his daughter put it on instead. Getting noticed was pretty fun, overall.

2:50:00 The cruise went to Sitka, a cool small town in Alaska. They had great fish and chips. Impulse pauses to consider the next steps of building. He’s actually making pretty good progress now. In Alaska they saw some whales, though not close up. The weather was cold but otherwise great, no rain. After Sitka they went to Skagway, but Impulse doesn’t remember what they did. He thinks they took a cool train ride. He is out of smooth slabs and leaves the tunnel to cook some rocks back at his base. Skagway had some interesting food, but it was good. Impulse was eating basically one big meal a day, but it was always good. The ship went to Juneau next, where they went on a dogsledding tour. They didn’t do the helicopter glacier tour because it was wildly expensive.

2:54:20 Impulse is caught up in his story and shoves his buckets of lava into the Smithing Input barrel. Chat informs him of this fact instantly, but he doesn’t catch it right away. “Nooo!” he cries when he notices it. He dives into the redstone and falls down a hole before escaping and climbing up into the smelter. He needs to stop the smelter from smelting itself. He mostly succeeds. He shows Chat some pictures from the dogsledding tour. There was no snow when they visited, so the dogs in the photo are pulling a wheeled cart. They look like very good doggos. After the cart ride, they got to meet the puppies. There is a picture of Impulse with a large and fluffy puppy, looking about as happy as he can be. Chat is charmed. Impulse says the puppy was very heavy and so cute.

2:58:00 The ship went past Dawes glacier. Glaciers are cool, and they got very close. Impulse talks about what glaciers are made of and shows a picture of a blue glacier. He gets a large dono and a nice message from a disabled vet starting his own channel. Impulse is touched and wishes him luck. He reads some other donos and subs. He talks again about going from 8C to 43C, but admits he got sick before they even got back, so it probably wasn’t the temperature. He did his best to wash his hands and use sanitizer, but cruises are disease vectors. On the last day of the cruise, they stopped in Victoria, British Columbia. Impulse woke up feeling a little sick. Victoria is a beautiful place and the weather was really nice. Impulse’s wife found a place that was supposed to have the best poutine in Victoria. They went to a pub called Irish Times and had poutine. Chat has a brief internal argument over the pronunciation of poutine. Impulse describes poutine (fries, brown gravy, fresh cheese curds but not like from Culvers, the unbreaded squeaky kind). The poutine was amazing. As he was enjoying his poutine, though, he realized he was sick. He got back on the boat and went to bed. His youngest daughter (the older two were there too, but they did their own thing on the boat most of the time) liked the bands, so she and her mom went to watch music while Impulse stayed in the room and ran a fever. He rested through the night, but woke up still sick and had to travel that way. They rushed off the boat so as not to miss their flight, and then the flight got delayed. He did his best not to complain and not to get germs on people. Eventually the plane did leave and they went home. Impulse spent two days in bed with his wife out on the couch and away from the germs. Impulse shills briefly for Factor Wellness Shots. He took every remedy he had available. After three days he started to feel better. He did not get a COVID test, but he’s much better now. It was an awesome trip with a lousy ending, but he got lots of good memories. It’s also probably the last time he’ll have a vacation with his whole family, parents and kids, together in the configuration they are now, so he wants to remember it.

3:13:00 Impulse thanks subs and donos. A chatter tells him a joke. He needs to figure out this music situation because Spotify keeps randomly picking nonsafe music after it finishes its playlist. The same thing happened to Skizz yesterday and Impulse should’ve been prepared, but he wasn’t. A chatter asks how long he’ll be streaming and he says not long. He has a podcast to record today. He shows chat how the wall light decoration works. He is justifiably proud of this. He reads off more subs and donos. He can’t believe how little progress he made today, but he had no “regerts.” He finds a random brick while digging and realizes he has almost dug into the other water elevator for Bop ‘n Go. Disaster narrowly averted.

3:17:40 A chatter asks for the podcast topic this week. Impulse says it’s dealing with failure. Most of the podcast episodes assume people can set goals and be successful at them, but they’ve never really talked about what happens when you fail and how you come back from it. He promises to keep it light, even inspirational. It’s important to embrace failure as a good thing. He hopes it’s a relatable topic, since everybody’s been there. He teases week after next with the possibility of another guest. They have a lot of people they want to get on the show, so they might have guests more often. Chat is enthusiastic and full of guesses.

3:21:00 Impulse look back and shakes his head about not even completing one full section. A chatter asks when he will come to the Netherlands. He says he’d like to one day. A chatter thanks him for inspiration to start streaming. Impulse places a few more blocks, then decides it’s time to wrap things up. He hasn’t even set up for the podcast yet. He is a slacker and Skizz is going to mock him for it. He notices that Cleo is streaming, so at least he has someone to raid into. He talks a bit more about the podcast topic for the week. A chatter asks if he reads podcast comments on Spotify. He says he does but not often, because they’re very hard to get to.

3:26:00 Impulse wraps up the stream and thanks chat for coming. It was a good coming-back stream. He reminds Chat to please, please, please watch the new video with its Important Lore. He thanks subs and donos. He tells chat he is not going to TwitchCon Rotterdam, but he will be at TwitchCon San Diego. He will double-stream on Friday, announcement soon! He raids into Cleo and ends his stream.

[bumpkinspice0]

Parallels Chapter 8: Not a Monster

Miguel O'Hara x Spider!FemReader

No use of y/n

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 5824

Summary: Miguel is lost in the multiverse and you're the only one that can possibly find him... but how? And what does it mean for your relationship?

Warnings: canon-typical violence, Slight Dubcon (Miguel is full feral but his advances aren't unwanted), ANGST, man pain, some self loathing, it's time to grow up and talk about our feelings... just a little. A/N: Electro is a silly, silly name and I couldn't take it seriously. You have my full permission to laugh at the fight scene.

Previous. Next

Series Masterlist

AO3

_______________

Chapter 8

Not a Monster

The Tower was practically empty this time of night. Your quick footsteps echo through the massive, vacant building, it was haunting.

You pull at your nanotech suit as you run down the long corridor. You’re still not used to the futuristic material. You had to rush out of your apartment, Lyla claiming there was no time to waste. You left a hastily scribbled note for Gwen and headed to the roof.

 A new wave of panic rushes over you as you enter the dark hallway of Miguel’s lab. It felt wrong being here without him. Lyla hovered with you the entire time. 

Miguel was missing. What did that even mean?

How the hell can you go missing when your energy signature is constantly tracked throughout all of time and space.

Lyla informed you of the situation as you ran. Miguel had gone after an Electro anomaly yesterday afternoon. He’d tracked it for hours through whatever universe it’d fallen into. It could teleport, making him extremely illusive. The last time they had a clear signal on his location he was engaged in combat then… nothing. He’d disappeared off the map for at least 10 seconds, then— he was everywhere. His signal was scattered to thousands of dimensions, each one indecipherable from being the real one. Lyla couldn’t reach him anymore. If she scanned them all at once she would crash completely, taking hours to reboot. She could only go through a few dozen at a time and her efforts were proving to be fruitless. Valuable time was wasted while she scanned through the multiverse at a snail's pace, so she called you in to help. You still had no idea why she called you of all people.

If Lyla, the all-knowing omnipotent AI, couldn’t find him, how the hell could you?

You walk to the center of Miguel’s laboratory, expecting to see dozens of spiders working tirelessly in front of computers to find him. Instead, you’re met with more silence.

“Lyla, where is everyone?” you ask, completely dumbfounded.

“What do you mean?” She glitches in front of you.

“Miguel’s missing. Don’t we have a team, like… working on this?”

“Not protocol,” she shakes her head, “At least, not for something like this anyway. We don’t want to cause panic. If we can solve this quietly, we will. In such a massive malfunction case like this, the lead duty falls to the architect.”

You furrow your brow, “Who the fuck is the architect?”

“That would be me,” A voice from overhead echoes across the cavernous room. Miguel’s desk platform begins to lower down. On top of it stands a man you’d never seen before. He was tall, tan-skinned, with messy dark hair and a lean build. He wore a set of goggles atop his head and loose-fitting clothes with an obnoxious striped scarf to top it off. You’ll never get 2099 fashion. No, you’d never met him before, but you recognized someone else in his features. That strong jaw, kind eyes, and pouty lips. This was undoubtedly Miguel’s brother, “Gabriel O’Hara. Gabe.” 

You jump up to the platform and shake his hand, offering your name as well. “Why am I here, Gabe?”

He lazily raises his eyebrows at you as if annoyed by the question, “You can track Miguel through the multiverse.”

You have to catch yourself from falling on your ass. “Excuse me?” 

“I told you to ease her into it!” Lyla blips in front of Gabe, several pixels flaring around her in anger. 

“We don’t have time to ease into it. We barely have time for a crash course ,” Gabe waves her off and walks to a computer. With the click of a button, a massive projection takes over the room. Intricate weaving webs of red connecting together. Within the webs, hundreds of white dots are scattered. “One of these…” Gabe points to a white dot, “...is Miguel. The real Miguel. The rest are false readings. I don’t know what that thing did to his watch and we have no way of knowing which one is the real one. It’s like his signature was cloned and thrown around. Lyla said we wanna try do this quietly before we jump to rally the calvary, so that’s why you're here. Your connection with him can make you do that. You can track him.”

Your heart instantly sinks. He was talking a mile a minute to the point you barely understood him, but that last sentence rings in your head like a gong. He knew.

“I told him,” Lyla explains as she materializes in front of you. You wonder briefly if she can read minds, but your dread must have been painted all over your face. “It’s our last chance and I couldn’t just keep important information like this. He’s the only one that knows my system, he would have found out eventually. You could be our only hope if—.”

“I– I don’t understand—” You finally stammer out.

“Look, I don’t know how your bond thing works either but Lyla seems to think it’s the best chance we have. So, whatever you did to get him to...” Gabe’s rambling comes to a slow halt. He must have finally understood what you’re confused, blank stare was about. He sighs into his hand, “He didn’t tell you, did he?”

“Tell me what?!” You blurt.

“That’s why we should have eased her into it!’ Lyla palms her non-existent face.

“Fucking Migs. Tengo que hacer todo por aquí ,” Gabe mumbles as he turns back the control console. “Here. You might as well hear it from the horse's mouth.”  A screen illuminates in front of you, Miguel in the center frame. It’s a recording, a timestamp and a date marked across the bottom. You recognize the date— That day after the Goblin Queen attack.

“New developments with the spider-sense connection,” He starts, his voice clinical and monotone. “While the sense was previously thought to be only triggered by close contact of various ranges, this is no longer the case. A response seemed to also be triggered by distress from the opposite party. I felt her while she was in her home dimension. This connection appears to be able to… transcend the multiverse itself.” He takes a moment to breathe into his hands. You share the sentiment. Your spider-sense can travel time and space? There’s just no way. You feel your legs buckle, catching yourself on the nearest chair. Miguel looks back up at the camera, “I went to her dimension last night. I just felt a… pull there. When we fought it was—”

Gabe stops the recording and you feel like you take your first breath since you got here.

The way you’d been feeling since this afternoon… you chalked it up to being too emotional over catching the Fisk’s and having nostalgia because of your great partner. Idiot, you should be able to recognize a spider-sense by now. Then again, if Miguel wasn’t there, what reason would you have to think it was?

A spider-sense that could stretch the multiverse? It didn’t sound possible. 

“He’s not in the original dimension he started in, we know that much. We don’t know what was damaged,” Gabe continues, “I know we’re asking a lot but you might be our only option here.”

This was just too much. He says it all like it’s so goddamn easy. It must be an O’Hara trait, you think. 

This was something that was so far beyond just you. The leader of Spider Society, the man with the answers to the multiverse’s fate rests in your hands. You want to scream. You want to fall apart and crawl into the closest dark corner and never come out— But you don’t have that luxury right now.

You’re Spider-Woman. You’d done more reckless things on less information dozens of times. Not necessarily a bragging point, but it helped you feel better at the moment. Miguel was out there somewhere. Amongst these thousands of scrambled dots, one was the real him— struggling and alone. You could feel him fighting.

Save Miguel first, yell at him for putting you in this position later.

Lyla materializes in front of you, a gentle expression on her face, “You can do this.”

So… How do you fucking do this? Your spider-sense was never something you actively thought about. It just happened, usually at the most inconvenient times. Maybe that was just it. You were thinking too much— You had to just let it happen. It’s as good a starting point as any. 

You swivel to the center of the multiverse projection and take a deep breath, closing your eyes. 

Gabe speaks, “What’s she—”

“Shut up!” Lyla instantly silences him in a hushed tone.

Several deep breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth. You feel the tension in your limbs melt away as the buzzing in your head becomes clearer— it was your guiding light. You’re not sure how to follow it, but if this thing was truly a part of you then it should come naturally… right? Your gut stirs, knowing somewhere out there your spider double needs you. Know that it may only be you that could save him. How poetic, you think.

You squeeze your eyes tighter, recalling those first feelings of the spider-sense. You’d never felt it before yet you knew exactly what it was. On top of that, you knew exactly what caused it. A completely alien sensation to your body yet you knew exactly what it wanted— You just knew. You weren’t naive about it anymore, you weren’t scared of it. You wanted to know its full potential. It was showing you tonight.

It starts like a faint pulse in your ears. A beacon. You open your eyes, taking in the thousands of twinkling white lights amongst the web of the multiverse. One of them is Miguel… the real Miguel. One calls to you.

You stand, walking amongst the projection. You step to the left, the pulsing fades— Colder. You continue to your right, following the rhythmic pull. You picture Miguel, everything about him. His face, his scent, the deep baritone voice— The pulse grows faster. 

You recall the way he squeezes your hips when he makes love to you. His touch was always rough but somehow still caring and loving. Ironic how that encapsulates him as a person. A sheep in wolf’s clothing. 

You come to a stop, one of the single blips seemingly shining brighter than the rest. Your sense jumps as you reach out for it. This had to be it. You tap the small projection, several screens expand with various information about the mystery universe. 

Earth 774-b. A decimated world ravaged by wars long past. Almost no human population. What remained there was rubble, slowly being grown over with moss. 

“This it?” Gabe steps to your side, looking over the schematics. 

“It’s… what I felt.” You answer. 

“Well, we wouldn’t wanna ignore a gut feeling,” He grumbles, jumping off the platform. He motions for you to follow— you do. Several small robots crawl to his aid, carrying various pieces of equipment. He comes to a work desk, rummaging several things out of the drawers, “Your watch, please.” He demands more than asks.

You extend your wrist and he immediately begins tinkering with the interdimensional device. He welds on a small bolt to the side, “This should protect it from any direct electromagnetic attacks. Wouldn’t want a repeat and have 2 missing spider’s on our hands.” He turns to one of the robots, grabbing a backpack it dutifully brought him. He reaches inside, grabbing a second watch, “This is for Miguel when you find him. I suspect his current watch is fried,” He drops it back in and pulls out another device. You recognize it as one of the force field traps, “This is for Electro when you find him. It’s specially made for someone of his abilities. You have 3 of them. Contain him first if you find him.” He hands you the backpack, “There are medical supplies and food and water rations. You have 3 hours before we send in backup. Stay in contact.”

And with that, he hands you the pack and walks back to the monitors. You feel like a kid thrown into the deep end of the pool. You don’t have time to think, you barely have time to breathe. After all your years of superheroing, you think you’d be more used to being treated like a soldier. In a lot of ways, you were still just a kid that got bit by a spider. 

You put in the coordinates to Universe 774-b. Lyla appears at your shoulder as the portal bursts to life in front of you. 

“If anyone can do this, it’s you.” She assures you. She probably recognized the fear in your eyes. “I’ll be with you the whole time.”

You nod, your mask materializing over your face. You were Spider-Woman. This was just another Tuesday night for you—no big deal. You can do this. 

______________

This universe had a distinctive scent you’d never smelled before. Like oil poured over fresh-cut grass. An entire planet that humans hadn’t touched for decades, but their crumbling cities and rusting machines still sat idle. Nature had already overtaken most of what remained in this dystopian New York— You hated it. It could very well be a bleak image of your home city. The thought makes you shutter and you push it to the back of your mind. 

It was mid-afternoon. You’d been in the apocalyptic world for nearly an hour now, Lyla leading you to the largest energy signature in the vicinity— Smack dab in the middle of what used to be Time Square. With no technology on the planet, it wasn’t hard to find. Your spider-sense has been a quiet hum the entire time here, surprisingly. You thought it would jump and sing as soon as you entered this dimension but so far it remained tame. 

It was starting to feel like a complete gamble on Miguel even being here.

What if your intuition was completely wrong? In the rush, you hadn’t even considered this could be all for nothing. A multiverse spider-sense tracker? Ridiculous. Miguel could have been wrong before. You could have just convinced yourself there was something special about this universe, surrounded by people begging you for an answer. 

This could all be for nothing and Miguel could still be lost… or worse. 

You push the intrusive thoughts down, not wanting to needlessly distract yourself from the task at hand. You had 2 more hours here and you were going to use them regardless. You were closing in on the energy signature. 

You hear it before you see it. Distant electric crackling followed by crumbling bricks. Hope overtakes your growing anxieties. You swing up to the surrounding rooftops and peer down into the crumbling historic square. There in the open center of the towering buildings stood Electro, alone and fuming.

“ Come out! Come out!” He screamed, blasting an electric charge into the withering billboard for Phantom of the Opera. By the looks of the surrounding freshly charred buildings, he’d been at it for a while. “ Come out and fight like a man! ”  

He was talking to Miguel. Taunting him… but where was he? Hiding or injured, most likely. You’ll find out soon enough. Even amidst the several revelations, relief washes over you. Miguel was here— somewhere.

You hadn’t seen an Electro like this before. Whereas most wore a green and yellow suit with an obnoxious lightning-decorated cowl, this man didn’t seem to even be completely human anymore. He still wore a skin-tight suit, but it was black. His skin glowed a translucent blue. You could see the energy flowing through him. It surged through his entire being, like blood through veins. He didn’t just have power over electricity— He was electricity. This was a being of pure energy. 

That would have been nice to know ahead of time. 

He abruptly halts his rampage, cocking his head to the side. Before you can react, a bolt shoots directly at you. It hits the bricks at your feet, sending you tumbling into the square. You catch yourself mid-fall and swing to the opposite end of the street. So much for the element of surprise. 

You find a perch on a crumbling billboard a few stories above the square. Electro faces you, searing in anger.

“ You’re not him! ” His electronic voice crackles, “ Where is he?! ”

“Look, dude, I was hoping you could tell me.” The attempted joke is immediately met with another rage-fueled blast of energy. You’re able to dodge this time, swinging down another level. You expect another attack but instead, you see the villain fall to his knees, wheezing and shaking. He was exhausted, who knows how long he’d been at this stupid charade. 

A realization hits you. He feeds off energy. It sustains him as well as his powers. There wasn’t anything for him to feed off of in this dead world. He was weaker— Significantly weaker. If there was a time to capture him, it was now. Gabe told you to contain him first before you hunted for Miguel.

You quickly grab one of the traps out of your bag. Not giving him a single second to regain himself, you pounce. You can end this now and find Miguel. Easy as pie. 

But of course, it’s never that easy, is it?

You’re almost on him when he vanishes, and you stumble to the now empty ground— Teleportation. Right. He reappears behind you in an instant. He doesn’t hesitate to blast you again at point-blank range.

An electric field engulfs you, surging searing hot pain through every fiber of your being. You drop the trap amidst the chaos. You twist and scream in the field, unable to control your body’s movements. It takes hold of you as you're lifted from the ground by nothing but pure energy. 

“ Your suit’s like his,” Electro laughs, “ Makes for a great conductor. Now let’s see that watch. ”

He knew about the multiverse watches too— Great. 

You could feel the nanotech waving in and out of existence amongst the static. You desperately reach for the trap, trying to shoot a web or just bring it to your hand by sheer willpower. No such luck.

Even amongst the blinding pain, you felt something. The very thing you’d been praying for since you got here— A buzzing in the back of your head.

It happens in a flash. A rusted car is thrown towards you both, missing you by inches but dispersing Electro’s being into thin air. You drop to your hands and knees, taking in the biggest breath of your life. The remaining energy twitches through you as you stand back on your shaky feet. Your nanotech suit tames down back to its original design. 

You look in the direction the car was thrown from— and there he is. Crouched on all fours with a mask drawn over his face. 

“Miguel!” You shout, immediately running towards him.

“S-stay back!” He growls, a deep raspiness to his voice. You screech to a halt instantly. He didn’t sound normal. 

“ Spider-Man! ” Electro materializes back above the square, arms outstretched. He couldn’t have much juice left. He was putting all he had left into this fight. “ And a Spider-Woman, my lucky day. I’ll kill you both and rip those dimensional travel devices off your cold dead bodies. ”

Miguel pounces immediately, swinging up to the floating menace. So much for making a plan. If Miguel had been stuck in this hellscape for nearly a day, you’re sure he was frustrated. He was lashing out without thinking— and it could be the perfect distraction. 

They dance around each other in midair. Miguel effortlessly dodging lightning bolts and Electro weaving between webs. Their efforts were fueled by rage and exhaustion. You take the opportunity to scale the buildings rather than join in the fight. 

Webs and brute force meant nothing if he could disappear at will. You had to be smarter than that.  He just had to get close and you’d have him. Proximity was all you needed.

You perch yourself 10 stories up, at least half a block from the fight. You pull out your second trap. With how fast they were moving, they’d swing by you any second. As if on queue, you see Miguel’s head snap in your direction. His gaze shoots through you like a spear. You hold up the electric trap and wave your arm in a beckoning motion, you think he gets the message. He swings the fight around, moving directly for you. 

Keeping Electro’s focus on him, they swing in front of you. You have a split second to react. Electro’s back to you, you jump. He’s only a dozen or so feet away from you and at a lower angle. You have the advantage. 

You arm the device mid-air as you lunge closer. Once directly above him, you release it. The trap locks on to its target and begins webbing glowing red beams around Electro. It entangles him, trapping him inside an impenetrable force field. Trapped, he plummets back to the ground. You swing down to follow, flanked closely by Miguel.

He tumbles to a jarring stop inside the makeshift prison cell.

“ What is— ” He stands, touching the glowing red walls. He’s immediately zapped away from the containment field. Enraged, he attempts to blast through it, only to have the electricity immediately returned and ricochet around the containment cell. He continues to rampage despite the repeated results.

“Lyla,” You say into your watch, setting the coordinates for Spider Tower, “Take him in.”

“Aye, aye,” The AI replies, a portal forming directly beneath the red cage. Electro drops out of reality in an instant.

 You turn to Miguel, only to find him several yards away with his back turned to you. His posture isn’t normal, he’s hunched over and twitchy. You can hear him dragging in ragged, growling breaths. He was tired. He’d just been through a traumatic event for all you know. 

“Lyla,” You say into your watch again. “Tell Gabe I’ve found Miguel, but just… give us a minute.”

“Don’t be too long,” She responds. Even though she’s artificial, you think you can hear a sense of relief in her voice. The crisis was averted. Miguel was safe— you think. 

“Mig?” You step towards him, cautiously reaching out.

“I said,” His head flinches to the side, sleek mask dissipating. “ Stay away! ” He slashes at you, baring his teeth and claws. His fangs, you’d never seen them before. His eyes were completely taken over by crimson red. His features were contorted and angry. He crouches down, resting his weight on his hands. He was trembling— Holding something back. 

His power dampeners— oh, you absolute idiot. 

Amongst the chaos, you’d all somehow completely forgotten the thing Miguel desperately needed to stay cognitive. The very thing that keeps a side of him at bay. He hadn’t dosed himself in nearly a full day, and the animal was taking hold. He was agitated. Volatile. Your spider-sense rings through you like a warning— or, something else?

This was not the same Miguel you knew. 

A glitch shakes through his being. His watch was damaged, unable to regulate his unstable atoms in the alien world. He comes out of the glitch raging, clawing at the surrounding rubble. Anything and everything was his target. He throws more cars, he slashes street lamps in half. So, this is what happens when he doesn’t take his dampeners?

“Miguel!” You scream over the chaos. He halts his rampage, staring you down. Those eyes were absolute daggers. You speak calmly “I have a watch for you. Let’s get you home and get you taken care of. It’s over. It’s gonna be okay.”

“Taken care of,” He repeats. His animalistic voice sends chills down your spine. He stalks toward you, you don’t move. Even hunched over, his height still dwarfs you. 

You take out the backup watch and drop your bag to the side. The spider-sense hummed in anticipation. You’re not sure if it’s telling you to run or stand your ground. Regardless, you reach for his arm. Just get the watch on him, and you can go. 

He grabs your wrist so quickly you don’t even register the movement. He pulls you against him. You feel yourself shrink in his grasp, and your spider-sense sings. He brings your wrist up to his face, trailing his nose down your arm with a deep inhale. He stops at your neck— you feel his fangs graze the soft flesh there. It sends a wave of heat straight to your core.

Why weren’t you scared right now?

“ Mi añarita. Me encontraste,” He growls against you, sending all your hair on end, “ ¿Has venido a cuidar de mí?”

He brings you down to your shaking knees, crawling on top of you. His massive limbs cage you in. You could easily scurry out of it— away from him, but you don’t want to. You could feel it building as you had dozens of times before. He could take you right here and you’d revel in it. 

It takes every fiber of your being to push down your building urges. Not here. Not now— He could be hurt and starving for all you know. You had a mission. Get Miguel home, despite what your selfish desires wanted. 

His guard is lowered, distracted by his primal impulse. You were completely on your back while he hovered over you. You take the opportunity to hit the home button on his backup watch, opening a portal directly behind your head. You raise your feet to Miguel’s stomach, kicking him over you into the portal before he can fight back. He needed his meds. You had to get him back now, like it or not.

“Lyla!” You scream into your watch, jumping through the portal as well, “Tell Gabe to get his dampeners ready! He’s on edge and we’re coming in hot.”

You fly through the dimensional wormhole, trailing only feet behind Miguel. He thrashed and spun as he was shot through the fabric of time and space itself. You take advantage of the rolling zero gravity environment and start to web him up, subduing his violent movements. The more he struggled, the worse it got. Simple webs couldn’t hold him for long but they’ll have to do for now. You had to get him back and everything could be taken care of. 

You both fly out of the portal, tumbling over each other on the lab floor. Miguel roars as he struggles against the webbing, several strands snapping in the process. He stands, whipping himself around violently, his arms are nearly free. 

A small neon green dot flashes across your vision. A dart filled with his dampener serum sinks into his neck. He collapses to the ground instantly. You turn to see Gabe holding a tranquilizer gun. 

“Three times the dose with a little bit of sedative,” He places the gun on a nearby table, “Sorry about that, his… condition completely slipped my mind.”

“Yeah, mine too,” You groan, picking yourself up off the floor. You look at Miguel laying there, subdued and face still contorted in anger. You have the urge to wail over the sight. You did this to him. You want to reach out to him, take care of him. He’s in pain and you—

You immediately head for the door, feeling your spider-sense threatening to make your emotions boil over. 

“He’ll be up in a few minutes!” Gabe shouts after you.

“Just need some fresh air,” You call back, picking up your pace. 

___________

You sit on the walkway outside of his room for nearly an hour. You dangle your feet over the cavernous edge, looking down at the vast multi-hundred-story tower. There wasn’t a single spider inside now. Gabe had left about 20 minutes ago, wishing you a good night and thanking you for your help. You tell him the same and that was that. Miguel’s brother, the architect of spider-kind… You wonder what his background role was the rest of the time. You wonder if you’ll ever see him again. 

You don’t know why you haven't gone home yet. You wanted to but… something was keeping you here. You wanted to make sure Miguel was okay, but you couldn’t bring yourself to go in to see him either. You wanted to… but you wanted to give him time. Hell, you needed to give yourself time too.

You felt another urge from the spider-sense tonight. The need to protect. To soothe and subdue. To save your— You were getting too close to him. Too close to all of this, and it scared you.

 You wonder if Miguel remembers. If he has any semblance of control when the spider side takes over. He seemed to, if only just barely. 

“Hey,” A familiar calming voice pulls you from your thoughts. Miguel stands behind you— The Miguel you knew. The man with kind eyes and rigid posture. The sight of him instantly puts you at ease. “You didn’t come inside.”

“I wanted to but… It felt… It was a lot.”

“Yeah…” He sighs, taking a seat next to you— the understanding is completely mutual, you know that by now. “You saved my life today. I won’t forget it.”

“Don’t mention it,” You look down at your feet like they’re the most interesting thing in the world. 

“I mean it. Thank you," he insists. You give him a faint nod and a smile. You want to ask him about it, about the animal inside him. About the spider-sense and why he didn’t tell you about its full capabilities sooner. About his brother, “I’m sorry.” He says instead.

“About what specifically?” you ask, coming off more irritated than you’d like to. 

“How about everything?” His words cut through you like a knife. You felt his guilt behind them, “Sorry you had to come here, sorry about Gabe, sorry you had to clean up my mess, sorry you… had to see me like that.”

You could hear the regret in his voice. Miguel O’Hara sincerely apologizing, you should get a camera. 

“What happened to start all this?” you ask. 

“It was a routine mission,” he starts, “He showed up in a populated area in a separate dimension. I thought it would be a quick grab. I underestimated him… drastically. You saw him, he could disperse his form at will. He could connect to any technology— Any machine. He got into my watch… to Lyla. I had to cut my connection.” 

Untold horrors could happen if a desperate villain got a hold of Lyla— a hold of the power of the multiverse. It was a scary thought. 

Miguel continues, “He fried my watch’s power by the time we landed. Thought I caught some luck when we landed somewhere he couldn’t recharge.”

“Your signal was copied over a thousand realities,” You inform him. 

“He scattered it looking for a way out, sending us both flying through the multiverse. When I cut off my connection, he was booted out of the system.” He clarified, “Didn’t want him to know where the home base was, anyway. Turned out to be a good thing, I think. Didn’t really consider myself at the time. I just had to keep him out. I would have figured something out eventually. I just had to outlast him.”

“Made a lot of work for me,” You grumble, jokingly. You bring your legs to your chest, resting your chin on your knees. “Why didn’t you tell me… That we could do this? Sense across the universe.”

He takes in a heavy breath, running his hand through his fluffy hair, “I thought it was a complete fluke. I thought I felt something and it turned out you were in a fight. Or maybe even a coincidence. Or if it was something, at least it only pertained to me. I’m… different from you. I had a shaky hypothesis. I should have tested it more. I’m sorry.”

Two apologies? You really should get that camera. 

“Did you feel me too, tonight? Across the universe?” you ask.

“Not until you were there. My mind wasn’t— I wasn’t—” He looks away, ashamed. You stomp down the urge to reach out and hold him. You don’t want to overstep a boundary. Did you even have those kinds of boundaries with him anymore? “If you ever have to see me like that again, you have my full permission to stop me… By any means necessary.”

“Miguel, it’s—”

“By any means necessary,” he repeats, tension dotting his words.

You could feel his self-loathing in his words. His hatred for this part of him. He was disgusted with himself. What he had done— what you both had almost done. You wanted him so badly in that moment back in the dystopian world, your spider-senses battling each other for it. You felt a little disgusted with yourself too. 

The only other person in the multiverse that could understand was sitting right next to you, and you feel like you couldn’t tell him anything.

You wanted to be his friend. You wanted this man to know he could talk to you completely judgment-free— and you knew you had to be the first one to take the step. You couldn’t keep each other at arm's length while still sharing these deeply intimate and personal things together. 

You don’t get to have your cake and eat it too. There had to be a compromise. You had to tell him you cared about his wellbeing— if only a little. You needed to. 

“I know you don’t feel like you can always rely on people, Miguel,” You begin, feeling his gaze drill into you, “I know you think you have to hold it all together yourself. That’s just part of being a spider… being a hero. But if that were true you wouldn’t have built this place. Even with all the help in the known universe you still think you’re the only one you can count on. Think about that.”

You stand, taking a few steps down the walkway. You take a deep breath before continuing “You’re not just a man but not a monster either, Mig. And you’re not alone. Remember that next time you treat yourself like you're expendable.” A portal to your dimension opens. You pause before stepping through, “I would do everything I did tonight again. I’m glad you’re okay, but don’t scare us like that again. Lyla was worried sick at the thought of never seeing you again.”

And so was I. 

His somber expression is the last thing you see before stepping into the multiverse. 

__________

Translations: Tengo que hacer todo por aquí.- I have to do everything around here. Mi añarita. Me encontraste. ¿Has venido a cuidar de mí? -My little spider. You found me. Have you come to take care of me?

And as always, let me know if I'm making a complete fool of myself, Spanish speakers! I appreciate anyone who comes in to help out with it!

__________

Taglist:

@ineedgarlicbread @pinkiemme @thesilenthill @bontensbabygirl @fallenangelsongwolf

[angst-king]

A man by many names Pt 10

(Can't believe we've made it to chp 10 ^-^ hope you like it so far) (CW mentions vomit, description of panic attack, bullying/torture) There was something familiar about you and your name, to Katsuki. It was clear you weren’t Izuku’s biological child, but why would he adopt a random kid? Why did your name sound like he’d heard it before?

“Hey Katsuki you wanted to look into the latest missing child case, right? Here” A small stack of papers was set beside him letting him know a file had been sent to his computer as well. He checked it out. They needed him to unscramble the photos used for the missing child poster. As he worked he watched the pieces come together, each set of pixels was like puzzle pieces being connected. Slowly with time the image became clearer, he furrowed his brows in disbelief. Now he knew why you looked familiar. But that didn’t answer why you were with Izuku, why would he take a child? Then he remembered the broadcast, he was the villain, and Izuku was Devour! He said that you had come to him after being kicked out, but could Katsuki truly believe that? Why would he take an interest in you all because you ran up to him for help? Why go through all this trouble for you?

It was a late night on patrol, and Katsuki wanted answers, he god damn it he was gonna get’em! He remembered Izuku’s route, and this time came on a less busy patrol time in hopes that would lure Izuku to him. He didn’t know much about Izuku’s villainy, he kept himself pretty low profile until now. No one had true reports of his appearance or witnesses of what he had done before all of this! He had heard around the area rumors about him or what might be him. Many locals said there was a person leaving mangled body parts. Very few reports spoke of seeing a tall figure hovered over a body. All he’d have to do is wait!

So he did, and it seemed like clockwork that he came around 1 am. A tall figure hopped from a roof and into the alleyway, the light jingle of the bag’s zippers echoed. The feet padded around until Katsuki turned on his flashlight. Yup even through the mask and hoodie he recognized those green eyes anywhere!

“Izuku?” Izuku froze and sneered, preparing to run in a moment’s notice, he put his guard ready to fight. Katsuki held his hands up defensively as he got closer.

“Ey ey I’m not gonna arrest you or whatever, I’ve just got questions.” Izuku backed towards the wall glaring daggers at Katsuki.

“No, i’m not answering shit” Then Katsuki grabbed him by the shoulder again to keep him from running and yanked in towards himself. He saw a look of fear flash in Izuku’s eyes, then a fist collided with his stomach. He let go before a set of teeth could come down on his wrist again.

“Shit that fucking hurts, what the fuck don’t bite me, you asshole!” “Don’t fucking grab me next time bitch.” Izuku spat and tried to get away again but this time Katsuki grabbed him by the bag swung him around into a corner and towered over him.

He grits his teeth in frustration, staring down at the green-haired man, and blocks his path.

“You either answer me or I arrest you.”

“Oh? For what?” Izuku asked snidely

“For withholding the missing child (y/n)” Izuku froze and looked up at him. He quickly tried to compose himself as anger coursed through him.

“And why do you think I have them?” “Because I fixed the photos they have of them, and they match the name and face of the child with you the other day.” With that information Izuku tried anything he could to get away, he didn’t want to tell Katsuki anything. He would probably have him arrested no matter what he told him. That bastard created years of his suffering, why in the hell would he cooperate now?

“Look I won't turn you in if you answer my questions, I won't say a damn word to anyone.” “And why should I trust you or give a damn?” Izuku asked bitterly being arrested in and of itself wasn’t the bad part. It was leaving you without anyone, of course, it had been set up that if anything happened then Dabi and Toga would look after you but. He knew neither of them could do it for very long.

“I want to help” Izuku ‘tch’ed and chuckled rolling his eyes at the blond’s proclamation.

“Yeah, you? Help? Don’t joke, you’re bad at them.” “I’m serious Izuku, I know you did the broadcast, and hearing just the confession from that sick fuck made me wanna vomit…How they could do something like that to a child.” “Yeah yeah, you’re real concerned, you’re still the same guy who tortured me for the majority of my childhood, so why would I trust you with that information? It seems like you haven’t changed either. Still a loud-mouth lunatic who has no respect for anyone.” Izuku squirmed and writhed beneath Katsuki, trying to find a weak spot to exploit so he could get away but Kasuki wouldn’t let him.

“Look I know I was horrible back then but, come on, its my job, and my kid’s friends with yours.” Izuku huffed, he knew Katsuki wouldn’t let him go until he answered him, just like in middle school.

“Fine.”

They sat down on the pavement to talk since Izuku refused to feel caged in.

“Alright, ask.” “Is it true (Y/n) came to you willingly?”

“Yeah, I didn’t kidnap them. The first time I found them outside wandering around in the dark, had to keep them safe. We kept meeting up every so often causes those shit bags kept kicking them out to party, so i kept watch.” “Why are you going after them, why not report them to the police?” “Because the police and detectives won't do shit and can be easily bought out with money.” Katsuki raised a brow, he could sense there was more to this answer than Izuku was giving.

“Didn’t think you had a soft spot for kids?” “I didn’t think you’d still be a hero but look where we are?” Izuku quipped folding his arms over his chest.

“You just didn't seem like the type to take in a random child and put yourself out there for one. I mean if you really are a villain, you must’ve been a quiet one, and now you’re in the spotlight anonymously or not. All for some kid” Izuku went quiet to him, you weren’t ‘some kid’, it sounded stupid but. You were his everything, his reason for living! You made him happy, you gave him purpose! He loved coming home to see the pictures you’ve drawn, or sitting on the couch and watching Bluey with you. He loved seeing you happy, hearing your feet pitter-pattering around when you got excited about something. Your big eyes lit up when he got you ice cream. He liked being the person to protect you, to show you the world didn’t have to be so horrible and scary.

“I…I like giving (Y/N) the chance at life and protection I never got. I strive to deliver the justice the adults around me failed to even try for.” He murmured while leaning back against the cold cement wall behind him. His eyes looked at the ground as a small smile crept onto his face behind the mask.

“Huh? Speak up dude, I’m going deaf” Izuku huffed and explained

“No one stood up for me, not my peers, not our teachers, principal, or my own mother. No one. I suffered that torture at the hands of them all. All they did was watch or turn away when I begged and pleaded for help as you treated me like nothing but a roach.” Katsuki knew what izuku meant, and remembered their school days. He wasn’t wrong, the teachers practically allowed it to happen, they punished Izuku for even speaking up at times!

“My mother was my only reason for living, I killed myself both mentally and physically numerous times but each time. She encouraged me to keep going, to find something, anything to hold onto. She may not have done anything when it came to justice but, she never belittled me or made me quit. As long as I didn’t lose myself, she would still love me.”

“Would she still love you if she knew you turned out to be a villain?” Katsuki asked, though he knew it came out rude, Izuku still replied.

“…..yes….at least the one I am now, I don’t think she would disapprove.”

He adjusted his mask and took glances at Katsuki who seemed to be taking in what he said.

“I was left for the wolves all my life, and I can’t stand by to watch another child go through anything similar if I can help it. When (Y/n) came to my house on the verge of unconsciousness burned and bloodied, I saw myself. I saw a small innocent being clinging on to life that people were trying to smash. I saw myself, I saw a child with who no one was bothering to reach out, they were turning a blind eye all over again. I couldn’t allow that.” As Izuku spoke he stammered and began to feel himself get choked up, tears welled his his eyes but he wouldn’t cry in front of Katsuki. He refused to do that long ago, he hated for anyone to see him like this.

Katsuki nodded along, it did sort of hurt to realize just how much he hurt Izuku back then, and how it lingered into his life now. He could feel the emotion even if Izuku tried to sound unbothered. He could still see everything he had done as he spoke. He could remember the countless days Izuku would come to school trembling in his uniform. He remembered Izuku’s screams, how he’d reach his hand out towards others for help, and they’d turn away from him with looks of disgust. As if he had a disease they didn’t want to catch. He remembered his muffled cries as he forced his head into the koi fish pond. Izuku’s arms and legs flailed as he drowned.

The days he came back to school bandaged up with dead tired eyes. Hell, he walked in on Izuku trying to slit his throat once and what did Katsuki do? Called him a worthless waste of space who wouldn’t even be able to kill himself correctly. It truly was a miracle Izuku was even alive and well, physically well that is, mentally it was obviously he wasn’t.

“I-i…..I’m…” Dammit Katsuki come on! Say it! You waited this fucking long, you may never get this chance ever again! Damn, his throat felt like it was closing up when he tried to apologize. The weight of realization was crushing him, the realization that nothing would be able to fix what they had.

“I-i’m sorry…Izuku.” It was hardly a whisper.

“Don’t waste your time or breath” Izuku said firmly, Katsuki looked at him with confusion. Didn’t he want an apology after all he did?

“Your words mean nothing, your actions say everything.” Well, Katsuki couldn’t argue with that sentiment, actions did speak louder than words. But how would he prove it to him.

“You keep our little secret and I wont kill you.” He wagered, Katsuki nodded in agreement. They sat in silence for a moment. It weighed over them like a blanket of snow before Izuku sent a side eye his way and asked.

“Are you done interrogating me?” Katsuki’s eyes darted to him and he sighed heavily.

“Yeah, yeah I am.” With that, Izuku stood up with a stretch, adjusted his backpack, and started to head for the roof.

“Ey, isn’t this your territory?” Izuku rolled his eyes at his question.

“I’m not hunting with the likes of you or your stupid lil friends around.” Damn, that was cold, but before Katsuki could say anything Izuku climbed back up the side of the building and onto the roof into the darkness.

Katsuki was now alone, alone with his thoughts. He couldn’t help the maul over everything. His childhood friend still saw him the same after all these years, what did he expect though? If Katsuki had been in his situation he’d probably do the same. What he did was practically torture! He brought Izuku to the point of suicide many times and now after years apart, he expects Izuku to just accept his apology? No! No. Izuku was right he was gonna half to prove it.

Sitting on the sidewalk Katsuki looked through pictures on his phone and found one of him and his child together.

“I’ll do better, I’ll prove it, I promise.”

He eventually continued on with the rest of his patrol until it was time to go home.

(pov change)

Izuku was glad to finally get away from him, he thought his heart was going to explode or abruptly stop altogether! When he got on the roof he collapsed to his knees clutching his chest and gasping for air! Fucking hell his anxiety was still just as horrible as ever! His chest felt heavy and tight as if someone were squeezing the air out of him. It hurt it hurt so much! He wasn’t even hungry for cannibal food or interested in hunting anymore. His entire body was tremoring, and his stomach sloshed nauseously until he found himself hunched over vomiting.

Just being around Katsuki made him ill, now he knew everything, or well everything pertaining to the situation with you and him. Not to mention he poured his feelings out to Katsuki, oh gods just remembering what he said made him wanna puke again. His vision was blurring and his mind started to become fuzzy. Shivering and shaking with tears down his face and sitting beside a puddle of his own sick. He hated this he hated this so damn much.

It took him a while to get off that rooftop, but he knew he had to get off before sunrise. He house-hopped until he found the convenience store. Grabbed himself an instant ramen pack and some meat on a stick, along with a soda. He ate his late-night dinner in an alleyway to calm himself down and give him the strength to get back home.

Once again he climbed in through the window and went to go and check on you. When he saw you fast asleep in your bed he smiled, you had struggled with sleeping on your own for a while. Often sleeping in his bed when you felt scared, tonight must have been an easy night for you. Izuku brushed your hair out of your face and pulled the blankets over you with a soft look in his eyes. He then went to get himself ready for bed now that he was coming down from his anxiety.

He took a nice long hot shower, washing off the blood from previous kills. Brushed his teeth to get the sourness out of his mouth, and changed into some comfortable clothes before climbing into bed. Damn, he loved his bed why did he ever leave it? Closing his eyes he was ready to let sleep take him.

But it didn’t his mind was still racing. He wanted to know whether Katsuki was genuine with his apology, he wanted to know why he truly wanted to get involved. Why did he care? Why did he bother to listen to his spiel? Was he going to tell everyone about this? What would this mean for them? Would you be safe now? Would the heroes come looking for you? Katsuki had now given them a clear photo of what you looked like so they would start looking for you. Was he planning an ambush? Would you and him have to move? He hoped not he needed to be able to continue his plan, but he also wanted to keep you safe!

Oh fucking hell just go to sleep, Izuku!

[monsterfloofs]

🦑🪐🎻

Albiorix (Alien) x Anonymous Reader (sfw)

(Squid bby, squid bby, squid bby!!)

You looked down from high above the starlite stadium, rows upon rows of seats filled with chattering beings from all corners of the galaxy. It was an amphitheater, massive in design, made to hold concerts with vast swimming crowds of beings.

It was your first time attending an event in something so gigantic, you surmised that there had to be a maintenance crew that lived here, when the amphitheater wasn’t in use. It could have easily been its own space station, charting courses to each new solar system, to sit spinning in the orbit with electric signs and screens that showcased collective talent from across the stars.

You bump into a tall android like being, that glanced over its shoulder at you.

“Sorry!” You squeaked before ducking away.

“Humans. . .” They muttered, and your heart sank, holding your tablet to your chest. You hadn’t synced your glasses to the data show that the others were participating in yet. Sticking to your tried and true methods of information until you found your seat. It must have been spectacular though, so many captive faces held in wonder, looking at a fixed point in the theater. It was eerie without the glasses on, folks just staring hypnotized into space.

You checked your tablet again, releasing a breath of relief as you sat down, and switched on your glasses. Suddenly the quiet space was bustling with dancing lights and commotion, a bright electronic pink heart pulsing above the theater, sending jagged zaps of electricity over the crowd.

No wonder everyone was staring, you watched the lightning shower into pixels that were swept into different images and sayings. Welcome in a stellar wide reach of languages.

Then a sound of strings purr to life as the light show fades, and a hush goes over the crowd. A soft glow illuminating the stage below, it was too far away to see the musician from this height, but screens blinked on to display the figure.

A multitude of string instruments help aloft with tendrils, as four arms played them, with elegant bows. Albiorix, nicknamed the symphony of one. You stared at the screen in fascination, how did they have the mind to do that many things at once? Being able to read all those different lines of music and notes. Yet their expression was as serene as the sunrise.

It was a captivating hour of song, ending with a spectacular and rigorous performance of a particularly complexe and fast melody. They bowed with all four arms behind their back as the crowd exploded into applause.

You took off your data-specs, letting yourself get bustled back to the shuttle by the waves of beings. Many were talking excitedly to each other. You put a hand in your pocket to fish out your pass back home, coming out empty handed. You felt your stomach plummet.

“Oh no. . .” You breathe, before turning like a fish trying to swim back upstream.

“Sorry! Excuse me! Oops— my bad!” You squeeze back through the crowd to check your seat. Patting down the chair and looking underneath it, in hopes of finding one stray card that had slipped through your fingers.

“Is there a lost and found near-by?” You asked a couple, who blinked multiple eyes before pointing.

“Thank you!”

You hurried down the stairs, tapping away at your tablet, in an attempt to send a notice up that there was a missing pass.

By the time you had talked to multiple beings, and searched high and low, most of the large crowd had cleared out.

“You can order a new pass,” A friendly face suggested,

“Won’t it take days to register a new one? Especially in the busy season?”

They looked sympathetic, “You can message your family, the station does serve food and has guest lodging.”

You try to smile, but it comes out frail and strained.

“. . . Thanks for your help anyway.”

You sigh, rubbing your cheek, so much for a short jaunt away from homeworld. At least it was going to be 10 days before the amphitheater was going to start its next leg of the journey. You try to cheer yourself up, putting your specs back over your eyes and looking around at all the signs that sprung up into your vision. Taking the path towards the room services to buy a room for the night while you waited for your new pass to come in.

“I didn’t know someone else was in this sector!” A cheery voice sounded at your back, causing you to turn around. Surprised as you saw Albiorix, four arms full of teetering musical equipment. Your eyes wide as you jumped to assist them.

“Oh! Thank you, thank you!” They bubbled, as the two of you fumbled around until you could stand back with some of their things held safetly in your arms.

“No one came to help you?”

“Oh-“ they made a sound like a cork being shot out of a pipe organ, waving a tendril dismissively.

“I told them to take the night off, I’ve lugged this stuff the galaxy over, and they besides deserve a break.”

You blinked, at the rather rude sound, an incredulous smile cracking across your face.

“Tosh,” They trumpeted cheerily, “Besides, I wouldn’t have run into such a kind soul if not! I was raised in a very different environment you know,” They rambled, “Not as social as these ecosystems, and I must say, I am a fan!”

You trailed beside them, a smile growing across your face with each step.

“I’m Albiorix, by the way,”

You laugh, “I think I know who you are,”

Another pop sound, “You know my music! Not me, I mean, true, that is a part of me! But did you know that I am quite the talker?” They blustered cheerfully. “Musicians can be very different then their tastes, when I was a young little shrimp, why there was this one very talented musician, with the personality of a—“

You never knew what they were, because it just so happened that the word must have not had a proper translation in your communicator. And you laughed out loud at the noise they made. While a language barrier existed, the tone came through loud and clear.

“They were really that bad?”

“Deplorable! From then on, I wanted to be a musician that could make friends wherever I go.”

You grin up at them, “Well. . . I think you accomplished that very well.”

[awnowimsad]

Hi I know you're aroace and aroallo blinkies are about a year old but can you please make an oriented aroace one or at least tell me how I can make one on my android phone?

Hi!! thanks for asking! even tho I haven't posted blinkies in a while it's no problem at all! I made these, I hope you like them! <3

I included the original ones and 3x upscaled ones. Also blank templates if you want to put custom text in them.

Also! I can't really make a proper tutorial rn, but if you or anyone else want to make blinkies on an android I'll still explain how I made it! I actually make blinkies on my pc, but everything can be done on android, too. (under a cut because wrote a bit much)

First you'd need a digital art app that supports layers (so most of them.) I use ibisPaint x which works fine. (though if you want to use it for blinkies or anything like pixel art you should go to the settings and disable "interpolation on zoom-in"!)

Make a canvas that is 150 x 20 px, and then make your background. In this case that was four 5px tall stripes.

Then for the actual blinking part! blinkie patterns are varied ofc but often for the simple ones I'll just copy them from a different blinkie. This one uses a simple pattern based on the pride blinkies from blinkies.cafe. I just changed it so the bottom "stripe" wasn't aligned with the top one, because then the blinkie would be asymmetrical, I prefer it this way.

For the flowing colors animation, you'll need as many frames as there are colors, so 4 in this case. Make the first frame on one layer then make the following frames, each on its own layer, however you want - by drawing them again or copying the previous one and editing it, whatever.

Then save each frame of the blinkie as a .png and plop them all in order in Ezgif gif maker. Change the delay time to 10 (or something like 8 or 12 depending on how you want it). And voila, a blinkie template.

The text! I'll confess for these ones I just made blinkies.cafe blinkies and removed the background. My art program of choice does NOT like pixel text so sometimes it's easier that way.

Anyway! The text! Write something on your canvas, either by hand lettering or with the text option. ibispaint x has some pixel fonts built in you can use.

You can save the individual frames with the text on it, but then you'd have to do it all again if you wanted different text. I prefer making the blank template like I explained.

So you should make the text look how you'd like it to look in the blinkie, and then save the text as a .png with a transparent background. Then go to Ezgif again and use the overlay tool to add your text! And it's done! Hooray!

Of course, if you wanted to add stuff like animated text it'd be more comlicated, but in general this works.

[pixel1678]

So, I planned on doing this yesterday, then I passed out, so I'm doing it tonight after all.

Introducing, the latest character... Adamandia!

...who is one of my most boring characters!

Basically, they're a robot originally designed for natural disasters, or more specifically, getting people out of fallen rubble after natural disasters, as earthquakes were common. While the main body is 5'6, it has 8 spider legs that extend to a max of 6 feet long for each individual leg, which is BARELY shorter than Pixel! However, after testing, the design was scrapped for a more exaggerated one, where the body is 5 feet tall and very skinny while each leg were 10 FEET LONG. Adamandia doesn't hate the new designs, and holds no resentment for their creators either.

After this, Adamandia was sent into a random alleyway, where they'd be forced to wait a long while before something happened. Luckily, they got to see many people. The spell tag came from a couple who were afraid Adamandia would be possessed, but they can't be, as there is nowhere for the soul to contain itself in, like a separate container in the main body.

The cracks were NOT from weathering, they were actually purposeful. Since Adamandia was scrapped early, they never got a fan upgrade, so to avoid overheated, they made cracks and holes in their own body to ventilate. It doesn't affect them though, they know what areas are safe to open up.

Eventually, they were teleported into the coffee shop of the area everyone is in. I should REALLY describe that area eventually, but I'll do it after I make a post with everyone's pronouns and possibly sexuality.

Yeah, compared to my other characters, they're not too interesting. Most of the other characters I just skimmed over the backstories, but this is the full thing for Adamandia!

Actually, one more thing, their voice uses a text-to-speech, the same one used by one of the many many many many many Sonic.exe inspired characters, Fatal Error, who's actually interesting compared to most of them. If you want the voice, here: https://imrane03.github.io/better-sam/ (speed to whatever, pitch to about 75, mouth and throat to around 123, Fatal Error is the same but the pitch is 0)

And that's every character for now, when I make new characters I'll be sure to keep y'all updated!

Bfkwbricgeb edit because I forgot the Picrew link so here you go: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/5209

[orionangeline]

✨💖Positivity chain! List 5 to 10 things that make you smile and explain why! Then send this to others to let them know they make you smile✨💖

Silly comics on Tumblr! I see a lot of little fanart comics and I love it

I have a short day at work tomorrow and then THREE DAYS OFF WOOHOO 🎉🎉🎉

the spirit Halloween in my town is open now and I love Halloween so next payday I am splurging even though probably I don't need a 30$ coffin shaped purse and I could totally get the same thing on Amazon for cheaper. It's the experience or something idk

My cats are draped all over my lap and they're so nice and cozy

ITS RAINING OUTSIDE

I found a website that let me download all my Spotify playlists so now I can listen to my music ad free AND not drain my phone battery by streaming AND I don't have to search each song one by one

One of my local libraries renovated and now they have a cafe AND THEYRE TASTY and run by my coworkers cousins I guess?? Small towns lol

When an anime/manga has a character in the background being a muppet and they're like 2 pixels tall but not only are they there, a dedicated blog has found them and posted them for me to see and enjoy

We have a customized Uno card deck and honestly I love making people rage quit with it. It may make me a terrible person but making my 12yo cousin so mad at my evil cards really just makes me feel so fulfilled

When I get asks! I love them. Honestly I always kinda want people to message and ask my opinions on tv shows or characters or cursed food or something... Or drama in the replies on something but I don't think I have the reach yet lol

[govindhtech]

What are ideal gaming laptop specs?

Everything you need to know about choosing a gaming laptop

You’re buying a gaming laptop. Maybe your existing one can’t keep up with the newest games, or you’re new to PC gaming. Whatever your reason, how can help you focus your search. Selecting a gaming laptop is vital as it will be your primary instrument in the gaming world. These factors will help you choose the correct equipment for your setup.

Mobile machine: shape and portability

You value portability how much? A 2.6kg ROG Strix SCAR 16 and 2.2kg ROG Flow X16 may look similar, but every gram counts if you carry the system all day in a backpack. If you’re on your feet less or the laptop spends more time at a desk, a bigger gaming laptop might provide a more immersive screen and greater performance.

Another form factor: external display? ROG Nebula screens are stunning, but the 13-inch Flow X13 lacks the real estate of the Strix SCAR 18. whether you intend to just use the laptop’s main display, assess if all your apps will fit or whether you should upgrade. However, individuals with supplementary monitors or portable displays like the ROG Strix XG17AHPE have additional form factor options.

What battery life do you need? Anyone who uses their gaming laptop mostly in their gaming area and seldom takes it on the road may benefit from a laptop that values performance and screen size above battery life and mobility. ROG Strix laptops may be suitable for you. You may want a laptop that’s as portable as you are ROG Flow and Zephyrus laptops provide outstanding gaming in thin, light designs that travel anywhere and are tuned for extended battery life.

Finally, sweat the little things. While not flashy, a laptop’s keyboard and trackpad may make or break its usefulness, so consider them. All ROG laptops include large trackpads with smooth, precise tracking to ensure you never miss a click, unlike many inexpensive computers. All keyboards offer deep travel, robust tactility, and single-color, 4-zone, or per-key RGB illumination. Bigger computers like the Strix SCAR 18 can fit bigger trackpads, number pads, and keyboard accessories. The Zephyrus Duo 16 and Strix G16 follow suit with a Number Pad incorporated into the trackpad for optimal space-saving and usability.

Recommended ultra-thin/light: Zephyrus G14, Flow X13, Z13 High-performance immersive screens: Strix SCAR 16 and 18 provide power and versatility. Zephyrus M16, G16

Make it pretty: refresh rate and resolution

Laptop screen size isn’t everything. Gaming displays rely on refresh rate and resolution, which might determine how much horsepower your system requires to maximize hardware performance. Next, limit your display choices.

A screen refreshes more times per second, resulting in smoother action. Competitive gamers use high refresh rate screens to gain an advantage, but casual gamers may feel the difference. High-intensity gamers need a fast refresh rate.

Response time matters, particularly with high-refresh screens. Response time indicates how rapidly pixels may change colors during a refresh, whereas refresh rate specifies how many frames per second a display can show. Slow reaction times might obscure moving objects, making it tougher to aim and fire at a distant opponent. Most ROG laptops have a 3ms reaction time or less, assuring clear motion for a competitive advantage.

That includes motion, but resolution the amount of pixels in each frame determines frame quality. Two numbers top and side pixels describe greater resolutions, which provide crisper, better-fidelity visuals. Most ROG laptops have extra-tall 16:10 screens, giving you more room on top and bottom.

Buying a PC with a higher-resolution display wins, right? Sort of. For the same refresh rate, increasing the number of pixels twice the graphics power needed to draw each pixel. This is why ultra high refresh screens are commonly combined with lesser resolutions, higher resolutions reduce gaming framerates.

Finally, will you consider HDR? HDR increases the range between the brightest whites and deepest blacks on screen, giving great realism by reproducing both dazzling highlights like the sun and dark, realistic shadows in caves and other poorly lit regions. Find gaming laptop with her gorgeous Nebula HDR displays powered by Mini LED panels or her brand new Nebula Display with an OLED panel, available on the 2024 Zephyrus G14 and G16, for the most immersive content and images that burst off the screen.

Top high-refresh gaming laptops: Strix SCAR 16, SCAR 18, G18, G16 Top HDR gaming laptops: Strix SCAR 16, SCAR 18, Zephyrus M16, G14, G16

Cool your gaming laptop: thermal performance and fan noise

Before choosing your hardware, consider the cooling system, an unsung hero. Anyone may put the newest technology in a stylish chassis, but without a powerful cooling solution, thermal throttling might reduce performance. ROG machines’ unfettered performance comes from almost a decade of study and design.

ROG Intelligent Cooling

Strix machines cool best They can accommodate more fans, full-width heatsinks, and heatpipes than other computers due to their bigger form factors. The CPU and GPU employ Thermal Grizzly’s liquid metal thermal compound, a novel substance that lowers chip temperatures by over 15°C compared to thermal pastes. As seen in TGP chart, Strix gaming laptop use their tremendous cooling potential to provide up to 175W of GPU performance, allowing NVIDIA’s 40 Series GPUs shine.

Cooling gets harder as machines grow smaller and lighter. While some companies may settle with subpar cooling in a smaller form factor, ROG gets inventive. The Zephyrus and Flow families of gaming laptop outperform similar thin-and-light machines without added noise or weight, thanks to the slim Zephyrus Duo 16’s Active Aerodynamic System Plus 2.0 system, the vapor chamber on her 13- and 14-inch devices, or a strategically placed third fan. ROG Intelligent Cooling will wow you, even if they won’t match Strix laptop thermal and performance headroom.

Wireless chips and port choices keep you connected

Your laptop probably supports Wi-Fi 5, a crowded technology with two frequency bands full with wireless devices fighting for a restricted bandwidth. ROG notebooks from 2022 and after include Wi-Fi 6E, the newest specification with 6GHz band access. If you live in a region with several Wi-Fi networks or struggle to connect your many devices, updating your router to WiFi 6E and connecting it with a new ROG laptop may improve your wireless workflow.

Finally, consider what sort of I/O you want. Do you want a few USB ports or a USB-C dock for Ethernet? Need a dedicated HDMI port? Want the gaming laptop to have as many ports as possible? Flow devices usually feature the fewest on-deck connections but may be utilized wirelessly, with docks, or with I/O extension like XG Mobile. Zephyrus gaming laptop have the most critical ports like USB and HDMI, whereas Strix machines have the most I/O packed in.

Flow X13, Z13, Zephyrus G14 are lean machines. The strongest I/O: Strix SCAR 16, SCAR 18, G16, G18 Balanced connectivity: Zephyrus M16, G16, Duo

Select CPU, GPU, RAM, and storage power

After picking the aforementioned features, choosing the remainder of the hardware is easy. Simplify CPU selection by eliminating intermediate and high-end options. All of ROG’s 2023 machines include flagship Intel and AMD high-core count CPUs, so you can’t go wrong. More powerful CPUs with more cores improve performance in open-world games, simulations, ray tracing, and other non-gaming jobs.

GPU power is different. The NVIDIA 40 Series GPU series has four performance tiers: entry-level, midrange, enthusiast, and halo. In broad strokes, the NVIDIA GeForce RTX 4060 Laptop GPU is ideal for 1080p, the 4070 for 1440p, and the 4080 or 4090 for ultra-fast framerates at 1440p or 4K. That plus upcoming innovation like DLSS Super Resolution, Frame Generation, and Ray Reconstruction should allow you to dial in performance for years.

They provide the total graphics power of all laptops so you can make the best selection. The same GPU might perform differently depending on the power given to it. For maximum framerate, all of current-gen gaming laptop include a MUX Switch to prevent GPU-display bottlenecks.

For most modern games, 16GB of RAM is plenty. Some games benefit from more, although they are rare. whether you’re unsure, explore your games to determine whether you need more. For individuals who prefer to have many tabs open in a web browser, talk with pals on a phone call, and stream while in game, 32GB of RAM is the finest memory for gaming laptop and should set you up for the future. Not all of gaming laptop enable you update the RAM, so purchase what you believe you’ll need for the future for optimum results.

Finally, consider storage More storage means more games may be loaded at once. 512GB can get you started, but current games are becoming bigger every year, so your collection might fill up rapidly. 1TB is a good start, with greater capabilities for long-term storage. As with other ROG laptops, storage may be upgraded later, but don’t underbuy if you anticipate your storage demands will expand.

Highest FPS: Strix SCAR 16 with Intel Core i9-14900HX and NVIDIA GeForce RTX 4090 Laptop GPU Value-packed flagship performance: Intel Core i9 14900HX Strix G16 with NVIDIA GeForce RTX 4080 Laptop GPU Casual gamers with diverse requirements benefit: AMD Ryzen 9 8940H with NVIDIA GeForce RTX 4070 Laptop GPU Zephyrus G14.

Read more on Govindhtech.com

[secondhand-trash]

Lenses

A/N: this is actually something that my mom does to my dad and I’ve wanted to write this for a while now lmao (this is probably not something you would get if you don’t wear lenses, if you don’t then read it in Tsuki’s perspective I guess lolol)

Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x reader

Word count: 1014

As someone who did not remember a time when he didn’t have to wear glasses, Tsukishima Kei rejected the idea of contact lenses with his entire being.

As someone who slowly obtained the need to wear glasses in their teenage years after a long period of unhealthy monitor using like most people of your generation, you embraced the option of looking clearly without having to push your glasses up every 10 minutes wholeheartedly.

“It’s disgusting.”

“What is disgusting?” you asked, your words slurring out slowly as you pulled apart your lids with your fingers.

Tsukishima’s face was contorted in visible discomfort as he watched you touch your exposed, vulnerable eyeball with your finger. He shivered at the sight, crossing his long arms that had been folded in front of his chest as his brows knitted tighter together. “That,” he clicked his tongue.

It was horrible. The fact that you were so at ease with putting a silicon film on your eye with your bare hand was horrible.

(The reality was that he had tried contact lenses, once, during a formal gala hosted by the museum that he could not get out of, even though he would never tell you because he knew you would never let him live it down. It was torture, he spent a good hour trying to put it in and then proceed to stab his eye trying to take it out when he finally got home exhausted. It turned out that his eyes were not  compatible with the lenses he wore and the result was that his eyes were red and teary the moment they could finally breathe. Every person that saw him the next day asked if he had been crying or if he was sick, Tsukishima swore from that moment on that he would never betray his trusty glasses ever again.)

You would roll your eyes, but your eyeball was too occupied letting the lens adjust itself to risk flipping it all the way to the back of your head. “I don’t get you, I’ve been doing this every day of my life since I graduated high school,” you let out a soft ‘tsk’ at how dramatic he was. You blinked away the lingering discomfort, feeling rather pleased with the new lenses you were trying out.

“Isn’t it nice?” you asked, turning to your boyfriend with your hands shielding the lower half of your face so that all he could see was your eyes, “These are new.”

Your eyes were like two crescent moons on top of your cheeks as you got on your tip-toes. He would have to admit that it had been a while since he last looked at your eyes specifically (not his fault, you were rarely on his eye level by all accounts), and the sight of you batting your lashes while looking up at him from a rather endearing angle had him a bit awestruck. His pride made him want to say that ‘why do people who wear glasses have to pretend they don’t need them’ but he had to admit that this particular type of lenses you were wearing today did make your eyes look like they have stars in them.

“So?” you asked, tilting your head a little and the giggle in your voice together with the (artificial) glimmer in your eyes almost put him at a loss of words.

“I can see the pixels on the lens.”

Tsukishima wondered why you did not seem to mind the films stuck to your eyes at all when you rolled your eyes.

-

Your boyfriend’s lack of appreciation for your 14.2mm dia coloured contacts did not dampen your mood at all. Who cares about him, you had a lot of fun admiring your own eyes in any reflective surface you could find all throughout the day anyways. Rather, his face scrunching up like he just ate a sour strawberry on his cake only made you want to poke fun at him more. 

“Kei.”

“What?” Tsukishima did not bother to look at you as he kept typing on his laptop that was placed on his lap, occasionally frowning at whatever it was in the leftover work he was dealing with as you rolled over to get closer to his side of the bed. The blanket that was covering his legs shifted slightly under an unknown movement on your side but he could not see what it was with the pale light from the monitor filling up his sight.

“Give me your hand.”

The crisp sound of his fingers dancing across the keys stopped as he slowly, stiffly turned to you. With his natural advantage, you could see the clear hesitation and hint of annoyance behind his lashes as he looked down on you. You only beamed wider at his expression, holding back an urge to giggle when he sighed.

“Why?”

You shook your head, “Just give me your hand!”

Tsukishima Kei stared at his grinning lover and extended his arm. 

His entire body crawled when he felt a moist, jelly-like texture in the middle of his palm.

You were laughing like a pig when his face twisted up in a visible pace, his lips parted to spill his usual mockery but all that came out was a string of incoherent noises. “Huh????”

Your stomach hurt as you tried to speak through your laughter, “Help me throw this into the trash can.”

The tall man shoved his laptop off his legs before bouncing off from the bed, his steps heavy on the floor as he marched out of your room with muttered complaints rolling off his tongue with each huff. 

He threw you a particularly resentful glance before disappearing out the door, and you only laughed harder at the irritation in his eyes.

“Thank you!” you yelled, stretching your arms out on the bed as you waited for him to storm back in.

Tsukishima stomped on the peddle of the trash can before throwing in the two thin, patterned contact lenses.

Yeah, he did not like these at all, not even for just one bit.

[oldschoolvpq]

Tamagotchi✩Fes. Merch Part 1: Exclusives

"Welcome, friend. Would you like to see my wares?"

Yes that's right - it's time for the merch post! Let's start with the event exclusives.

These 4 items are exclusive to the event, and once it's over January 23, from January 24 you'll be able to buy them from the Namco Parks online shop (accessible via QR code shown) until February 28. Shipping to Japan addresses only, so maybe ask a friend or use a proxy if you can't live without them.

Your blind-bag chase item this time around is a set of 14 acrylic character standees about 6 cm tall. Gonna be honest, I didn't purchase any because Masktchi wasn't included in the lineup, and I prefer Melodytchi in her pink dress...but they are pretty cute displayed as a full set.

Next up is a long-sleeve shirt! The pixel art screen print is simple but REALLY good. (I have a sneaking suspicion that the person in charge of merch is Ginjirotchi fan).

3,800 yen is a bit pricey for what is essentially a glorified tee-shirt, but I was impressed with the thickness of the fabric as well as the fit - usually a Large shirt will just fit, but this one was delightfully roomy...I even had extra length in the sleeves, which is basically unheard of here! I probably could have gone with the Medium size that was available, but honestly, either one works. Needless to say it fits perfectly into my casual weekend wardrobe.

Next are the Kuchipatchi drinking glasses! 1,500 yen each, limit of 2. TOTALLY adorable, especially when you see them in motion.

Finally, a printed mini-towel! Not gonna lie, this is a great design...but I already have SO many washcloth-sized towels.

Seriously, towels and plastic folders are the quintessential souvenir items at these sorts of event shops because they are small and inexpensive. Towels especially make great casual gifts. I really can't express in words just how many branded towels I've either bought or received from other people in 10 years of living here!

Back on topic, I'd love to see this design make a return on future merch. That one red heart is such a great accent!

Next on to the standard merch.

[infinitelysordinary]

who has the biggest base on empires smp? (as of july 1st, 2021)

a somewhat in-depth mathematical deep dive into empire smp’s bases

THE CONTEXT.

for the past two weeks or so, scott (also known as: scott smajor, smajor, smajor1995, dangthatsalongname, and branding nightmare) has been building up his second base, effectively taking down his starter house.

most of this building occured during his streams, where he often proclaimed that he thought he was building the “biggest base on the server.” when his third empires smp video came out on june 26, 2021, his titled said “The Biggest Base on the Server! - Minecraft Empires SMP - Ep.03.”

however, the day after, joel (aka smallishbeans) uploaded his fourth episode of empires smp, titled “Building My House! | Empires SMP | Ep.4 (1.17 Survival).” within this video, he claimed that he had the biggest house on the empires smp server. he even went as far as to trap an afk scott in a cage of stone, and writing out three signs asking scott to change the title of his recent video.

[Image Description: A zoomed in screenshot from Joel’s newest video. The screenshot was taken within Scott’s house. There are two walls shown and a birch floor. In the middle, there are three oak signs. Joel’s crosshair is on the middle sign.

The first sign says: “Hello Scott, please can you change your video title as”

The second sign says: “It says you have the biggest base. This is wrong. My base is bigger”

The third sign says: “Come have a look if you want. - Joel”]

so, that begs the question: who has the biggest base on the empires smp out of scott and joel?

THE SEMANTICS.

now, for the purposes of today’s adventure, we’re only going to be counting the volume within the base. this does not include windows, outside accents, bridges, gardens, walls, doorways, or anything else that is not within the confines of the base itself. floors and/or divides do not count towards the total, as they take up space and are not “easily moved.”

the only exception is balconies--the space on a balcony counts towards the total, though that space is counted differently. on enclosed balcony, i.e. a balcony that is surrounded by fences and has a roof-like structure that blocks out rain, all the space that fits between the fences, the roof, and the floor count.

on an open balcony, i.e. a balcony that only has fences and a floor, with no roof, only the two blocks of air on top of the floor and in between the fences count.

similarly, both of their bases are defined by their respective houses that they built during the episode. their farms, tents, bridges, and any other structure that they have built previous do not count towards the total.

i will be only using screenshots from their own videos, e.g., i will use scott’s video (published june 26, 2021) to find the volume of his base, and use joel’s video (published june 27, 2021) to find the volume of his base. anything that scott has added between his video and joel’s will not be counted, neither will anything that either of them created after the fact.

i will not be counting joel’s most recent video, titled “Pranking Lizzie, Interiors & Windmills! | Empires SMP | Ep.5 (1.17 Survival)”, because that was uploaded when i was writing this analysis. like, after i finished all my counting, but when i was writing this post. so, uh-

also, i am not counting anyone else’s bases within this experiment, though i do believe others have similarly sized bases. the other creators not a part of this post until they officially get involved in the ‘rivalry’

THE METHOD.

first of all, volume is calculated in minecraft blocks cubed. a typical ‘minecraft block’ is just a full block, like planks, logs, or stone. i’m not going to calculate this accurately (i.e. counting the space that the glass panes leave behind), mostly because i cannot be assed.

SMAJOR’S BASE.

the volume of smajor’s house, in theory, is relatively easy to find. because his house is just a right pentagonal prism, we can use the formula B*h to find the volume. B is the area of the ‘base’ (which, in this case, is the front/back of his house), and h is the depth of his house.

[Image Description: Two screenshots from Scott’s newest video. Both screenshots have lowered transparency, and are slightly dulled.

One screenshot is of the inside of his house, as he looks at the back. The floor is still grass, though the walls are up. There are dozens of arrows within the floor and towards the back of the wall. On top of the screenshot, someone has noted that there are 13 Minecraft blocks across the back of Scott’s house.

The second screenshot is from the outside of Scott’s house, as he looks up at it. The house appears to be finished. On top of the screenshot, someone has noted that there are 10 Minecraft blocks from the floor up to the start of the room. There is a red marking where the roof hits the wall.]

there are two parts that add up to B: the rectangular bit, and the roof. in these two screenshots, i’m finding the area of the rectangular bit.

the rectangular bit is 13 blocks across and 10 blocks wide.

[Image Description: A screenshot from Scott’s newest video, with lowered transparency and slightly dulled. It’s from Scott’s timelapse, taken up in the air. Scott isn’t finished building his house. One side of the roof is done, as well as all of the walls below and the two faces. 

There are various notations on the screenshot. A blue marking on the bottom counts 10 Minecraft blocks up. A block above that, a red marking notes that the roof, at its widest point, is 15 Minecraft blocks wide. Another red marking notes the slope of the room. An arrow points towards the top of the roof, saying “later adds on 3 blocks here”

To the right, there is a header saying “TO-SCALE MODEL:” Below, there is a pixel model of the front and back of Scott’s house, which are the same. There is a blue rectangular section on the bottom. On top, there is a red roof. There are 3 purple pixels on the top. Markings on the model show the measurements. A dotted line goes through the model, splitting it up into two sections: a rectangle on the bottom, and the roof on top.

Inside the rectangular section, someone has noted down “11 * 13 = 143 mb^2″ the “143 mb^2″ boxed in. Inside the roof section, someone has noted down “111 mb^2″

Below the screenshot, someone has handwritten “143 + 111 = 254 mb^2″]

the second part is the roof. the roof goes outwards for two blocks, and then goes back inwards. using this reference for the roof, the previous two screenshots for the bit underneath, and cross referencing them to find out where they meet, i created a to-scale model of it!

i found the area of the to-scale model, and B = 254 mb^2

[Image Description: A screenshot from Scott’s video, with lowered transparency and slightly dulled. The house isn’t finished--there’s only half of the side wall and the front detailing. The screenshot is taken from Scott’s timelapse, and is from the side of his base; only the side wall is visible.

Someone has marked over the screenshot with a lime green pen. On the top right, someone has written “* coutning the inner wall only”. An arrow is drawn upwards from one side of the side wall. It says “wall starts here”. On the other side of the wall, there is another arrow that says “wall ends here”. In between the two arrows, someone has made tick marks indicating where the blocks are. On the bottom, someone has noted down “3-wide doorway” by the side entrance. Off to the bottom ride, it says “24 px deep”]

next, i used this screenshot to find the h of scott’s base! this was a bit harder because scott doesn’t show the bottom of his base until he’s already detailed it, but with the precise use of my Big Brain (and my wacom tablet), i counted that it was 24 pixels deep.

so, B * h = V = 254 * 24 = 6096 mc^3

but we AREN’T DONE YET

[Image Description: On the left, there are 3 screenshots from Scott’s newest video stacked vertically on top of each other. The first one is of the side doorway. Pink ticks mark the how many blocks wide and tall the doorway is. On the right of the first screenshot, there is a solid pixellated model of the doorway in the same pink. Inside the model, someone has written “18 mb^3″ in white. On the right of the model, someone has written “volume of the side door-way” in pink.

The next screenshot is taken from the inside of Scott’s base, showing the front doorway. Orange ticks mark how many blocks tall and wide the bottom section of the front doorway is. It is 8 blocks wide and 3 blocks tall. The bottom most screenshot is a picture from Scott’s timelapse, where half of the roof hasn’t been built yet. Someone has drawn lines on the building going horizontally, dividing the top section of the front doorway into three sections: one 3 block section on the bottom, and two 2 block sections on top. On the right of these two screenshots, there is a solid pixellated model of the front doorway, labelled accordingly, in orange. Inside the model, someone has written “39 mb^3″

Below the screenshots and the models, someone has written “6096 - 39 - 18 = Vi = 6039 mb^3]

see, scot also has two main doorways: one at the entrance and one on the right side. i used the first screenshot to find the volume of the side doorway, and the next two screenshots to find the volume of the front doorway.

(this is the part where i might be wrong--i couldn’t find a reliable reference for the the front doorway, so i had to use an extremely zoomed out version. the stripped spruce log section underneath the window is either 2 or 3 blocks tall. i assumed 3 based on the bottom most screenshot but like. i could be wrong)

anyway, the first doorway is 18 mb^3, and the second is 39 mc^3. so, the total final volume for scott’s base is 6039 mb^3.

JOEL’S BASE.

joel’s base, on the other hand, is genuinely fucking insane. like, seriously. what the fuck, joel. you couldn’t have made it harder for me to do my job (it does look amazing though and i love it so much)

so, instead of taking screenshots and calculating the volume of his base through those references, i decided to build a replica of joel’s base in my own creative world, and after fill it with sand. i could then count all the sand from his base and add it up to achieve a (somewhat accurate) volume for his base

[Image Description: An array of screenshots of a replica of Joel’s base, laid out in a three by two grid. Each is labelled with a black, comic-style font. The first screenshot is taken from the front of the replica from up in the air, and is labelled “FRONT.” The second screenshot, which is to the right of the first screenshot, is taken from the right of the replica from up in the air, and is labelled “RIGHT SIDE.” The third screenshot is taken from the back of the replica from jup in the air, and is labelled “BACK.” The fourth screenshot is taken from the left of the replica up in the air, and is labelled “LEFT SIDE.” The fifth screenshot is taken from the front of the base, and the player is on the ground. It is labelled “FRONT (FROM THE GROUND).” The last screenshot is taken from the inside of the base, looking towards the back. It is labelled “INTERIOR (FROM THE GROUND).”]

anyway, most of his base is relatively easy to copy. my replica is pictured above. there are two time lapses within his video that show his process of building his base. the first timelapse (4:59-5:54) is shot from the front of his base, and angled slightly downwards, and is where i got most of my references from. the second timelapse (9:48-9:55) is shot from the diagonally back left of his base, and is what i referenced for the back of my replica.

the roofs themselves are symmetrical: barring the roofs’ intersection, the blue and red roofs are the same the entire way around. this is why, even though i technically didn’t see the back of joel’s base, i knew what it looked like and could get an accurate replica of it.

the only problem is that he never showcases the base from the left. this means that the red and blue roof intersection on the left could be very wrong. the only reference i got for this part was a screenshot at 6:12 (pictured below). this only showcases the inside of the roof, and from bad lighting, but it’s better than nothing.

other than that, though, i’m. pretty sure my replica is accurate! 

[Image Description: A screenshot taken from Joel’s video, from approximately 6:12 in the video. Joel is inside his base, staring up at the red roof from the bottom. The floor is lit up by torches, but the details of the roof are barely visible in the darkness.]

next, i filled his entire base with sand. this was the most tedious part--never have i ever placed so much goddamn sand in minecraft. do not recommend, 0/10

i made sure that i filled the entire base by going into spectator mode! (i can’t fit the pics in here because, well, image limit. but i promise the entire build is full)

and, after 2 diamond shovels, two stacks of torches, a handful of night vision potions, here is how much sand i have:

[Image Description: Four screenshots, layed out in a two by two grid. The first three screenshots showcase the inside of three different double chests. They are all filled to the brim with stacks of sand. On the first screenshot, there are two notations, both in blue: one that notes out that there are 9 columns in a double chest, and another that notes that there are 6 rows in a double chest. The last screenshot is that of the interior of partially-full double chest, with 21 full stacks within it. Someone has noted down “21 stacks” in red.

Underneath the four screenshots, someone has written “number of stacks * 64 = Vt” in black. Beneath that, someone has written “there is 54 stacks in the full double chests” in blue. Beneath that, someone has written “( (54) (3) + 21) (64) = Vt,” in various colours. “(54)(3)” is in blue, while “21″ is in red. The rest is in black.

On the bottom, someone has written “Vt = 11,712 mb^3″]

the final total for joel’s base, as of july 1st, 2021, is 11,712 mb^3

THE CONCLUSION + TL;DR.

scott smajor’s title was not a lie, or at least not at the time. he had the biggest base on the server as of that upload. but soon after, joel created a base that was nearly two times scott’s, creating the bigger base out of the two of them.

so, yeah! joel has a bigger base than scott as of july 1st, 2021

this is because 11,712 mb^3 > 6039 mb^3

thank u and goodnight. send me any asks if u find anything wrong with this stupidly lost post, or if you want any progress pics! love y’all

[giantpredatorymollusk]

Let's talk about the .webp format.

Webp for animations

We will hereby examine the various ways to turn the above clip from Princess Tutu, which I'm uploading as a 600 pixels tall 967,000 byte mp4, into a GIF-style looping animation. The easiest way is obviously to turn each frame into an image and make people page through them. Let's do that, and, to keep things simple, we'll use the Microsoft Paint BMP format, which uses no image compression:

Job done 😌 we now have 187 BMP files that i should be able to share with all of my friends over the internet. Except, wait,

Our clip has gone from 967,000 bytes to 387,773,298 bytes. This is 400 times bigger. If I start a social network where people can share clips and they do it by sending hundreds of BMPs back and forth, I will use up a lot of storage space and bandwidth, and the user experience will probably be somewhat slow. Maybe a less simplistic approach is in order.

I have also created a nice GIF version of the scene. It is not pictured, because it is 3 times Tumblr's maximum GIF size limit:

This saves a lot of hard drive space over the "hundreds of BMPs" approach, but it still yields a fairly large file. The GIF format was created in 1987 and last updated in 1989; it was intended to display simple clip art on computers that looked like this:

One way this makes itself evident is through the limited color palette that each GIF uses. If you don't want to use weird tricks that explode the file size, a GIF can only use 256 distinct colors per file. Here some of them are, plainly visible in a detail shot of my new GIF:

Artful blending of these colors can hide the limited palette a lot of the time, but it seems like a dumb sacrifice to have to make when using such a large file. Anyway: if we want a Tumblrable GIF, we need to put more work in. Let's try shrinking the GIF to 300 pixels tall, cutting the frame rate to 15 per second, and reducing the quality using the gifsicle utility's "lossy" option:

It's here 🥺

It's 6,010,622 bytes (6mb), so it's about 6 times bigger than the original mp4, and looks much worse.

"What was wrong with the original mp4, anyway?" Nothing, except that browsers and image viewers know to play GIFs automatically and loop them, and Tumblr lets you arrange them into a grid. If everyone were to listen to me, I could simply say, "if you rename a .mp4 file to end with .mp4loop instead, it needs to be autoplayed and looped, and can't have sound" and we could just use those instead. But no one listens to me.

Let's continue to try to find technical solutions to this dumb standardization problem. Weren't we supposed to talk about Webp files?

A 6mb Webp file can store the clip at its original resolution and framerate. Evidence

If we reduce the Webp to 300 pixels tall and 15 frames per second like we did with the GIF, it's now 1,902,920 bytes, which is roughly a third of the size that the GIF was. Evidence

So it's obvious that using Webp files allows for much higher quality and/or much smaller files, which is extremely desirable if you're running a website, or if you're a website user that wants things to load quickly. Everyone should want this thing. You may have noticed, though, that I had to link to those Webp files instead of uploading them directly. This is because Tumblr doesn't support uploading them (probably because they don't think you'll have any Webps you'll want to upload from your computer.) Neither do browsers support them particularly well: Despite the fact that the format has been out for 10 years and growing in prominence the whole time, only recent versions of Safari on Apple computers and phones can display Webp files; the browser watchdog website CanIUse estimates that they're available to about 93% of devices. If you're running a social media site, you probably don't want to block 7% of people from seeing animated content. Also, if I try to download them, I soon find out that the Photos app on my Windows 10 laptop has no idea what these files are.

So, websites are strongly incentivized to use the Webp format instead of the GIF format and users are not necessarily going to like it when they do, probably because developers of software like browsers and image viewers don't realize how inefficient GIFs are from website creators' point of view and how they should be replaced. Great job, guys. Are there any other places where Webp images could be used?

Webp for still images

Although Google claims that Webp files are 30% smaller than JPGs, they are actually usually not smaller than JPGs that are created with an advanced encoder like Mozilla's MozJPEG. However, Webps are 26% smaller on average than equivalent PNGs no matter what, which means that they're the naturally preferred format for images with transparency, which means you might as well just use them for everything instead of having both PNGs and JPGs (which are smaller than PNGs but don't support transparency at all), assuming people upgrade their browsers.

The Conclusion

Websites use Webp files so they don't have to distribute larger, lower-quality GIF files (and just plain larger PNGs) to you. One alternate way people have tried to replace the GIF format is: those things labeled "GIF" on Twitter are actually just normal mp4 video files that they try to force browsers to autoplay and loop. Attentive readers will note that this is very similar to the ".mp4loop" replacement for the GIF format that I proposed. However, Twitter's solution only works on Twitter, because if you download one of these "GIFs" you'll get a non-looping video that looks like it should have sound and doesn't, which makes them harder and more confusing to play and share around. But people continue to not listen to me. If you're annoyed at Webp files now, wait until you start seeing the new AVIF, APNG, animated SVG, and HEIF formats. The fact that the term GIF at this point refers not just to a type of binary file but, effectively, to a genre of highly shareable media is fascinating to me; the goal people should have is to create a file type that removes the GIF format's technical limitations while preserving its social capabilities. A coordinated solution to this goal is only difficult because of the need for coordination.

[rhyselinn]

Gather round folks, it’s time to talk about Shovel Knight characters’ canon heights!

First things first, let’s talk about our friend Reize Seatlan.

His creator, Seizui, has been building canon around this character for years, and this link tells us that Reize’s canon height is 160 cm (5'3").

Let’s take a look at this boy’s sprite: (complete with blue Photoshop rulers in case you want to see where I measured from)

*caveat: Reize’s hair is extremely fluffy. It runs in the family, so I counted his height as being shorter than the height of his hair. It makes sense and it makes the math easier

Counting the pixels in Reize’s sprite, we can see that he is 32 pixels tall. So when we divide 160 cm by 32 pixels, we discover that each pixel in the Shovel Knight universe is 5 centimeters in real life.

So, what does this mean for the rest of the Shovel Knight cast?

Great question: I’ve got the rest of the math (with screenshot proof) under the cut:

Alright, in no particular order, let’s talk about Plague Knight next.

--Worth noting that I’m using playable/Showdown sprites as opposed to boss sprites when possible. This helps keep characters proportional to each other

--Plague Knight is 31 pixels tall = 155 cm tall = 5 foot 1. Tiny plague knight, but as we’ll see later, not the tiniest member of the cast

Tiniest member of the cast, you say? Could you mean... Tinker Knight?

--Tinker Knight slouches in almost all of his sprites, so I tried to find a sprite of him NOT slouching. That extra pixel makes a difference for this tiny character lol

--27 pixels tall = 135 cm tall = 4 foot 5. tiny tinker. But still not the tiniest member of the cast, believe it or not!

Shovel Knight:

--fairly straightforward. i did wonder if his victory pose was any taller than his regular pose, but it's not

24 pixels tall = 120 cm = 3 foot 11. tiny. tiny shovel. the average 9 year old child is between 120-145 centimeters. So not only is Shovel the size of a 9 year old, but he might actually be the shortest in the class...

Black Knight:

--there are interesting things i could say about the bird feather situation but eh. imma go with eh. bird feathers do not count as height, final answer --other than that, pretty easy here

24 pixels tall = 120 cm = 3 foot 11. same size as shovel, aka also the size of a 9 year old. adorable

Propeller Knight:

--slouches REALLY BAD. ALL THE TIME. --his least slouch-y sprite is his tuxedo sprite from the end of Plague of Shadows, so I used that initially... only to realize that he's the exact same height in his other sprites as well. How about that! Maybe he has some kind of a battery pack for his propeller hat in the back of his shirt. It would explain his terrible posture.

--39 pixels tall = 195 cm tall = 6 foot 4. Tall, but not unreasonable.

Mole Knight:

--has some fascinating squash and stretch in his sprite sheet --fabulous from an animation standpoint. difficult from a math standpoint --i refuse to count his fire-hair as height lol

Squash sprite: 32 pixels tall = 160 cm = 5 foot 2 Normal: 36 pixels tall = 180 cm = 5 foot 10 Stretch sprite: 46 pixels tall = 230 cm = 7 foot 6 (!!!)

I have no explanation for this other than artistic liberties lol

Specter Knight:

--i'm so glad player sprites exist lol. Specter's boss fight sprites are just piles of cloth with him slouching underneath. I will gleefully ignore them for this exercise --that said, even with player sprites, specter knight is HUNCHED OVER ALMOST ALL THE TIME. AUGH. --fortunately, cold shoulder sprites exist, and a few other action-y type poses. they’re pretty consistent with each other (within a pixel or so) --how much of Specter's hood is fluffy cloth vs actual height? good question. I compared to one of Donovan's sprites to give us a good estimate, give or take 1 pixel or so

37 pixels tall = 185 cm = 6 foot 0. Pretty average here.

Treasure Knight:

--also slouches in a lot of his sprites, but at least has a few non-slouchy sprites for us to examine. I chose the taller of the two for consistency (difference of 50 vs 51 pixels)

Treasure Height: 51 pixels = 255 cm = 8 foot 4 (!!!?!) This man is huge!

King Knight:

--his normal standing sprite met my requirements, so I used that --I included his boss sprite without the crown for comparison, because a crown does not actually make one taller lol (sorry not sorry, king) --this also shows the importance of using player sprites vs boss sprites. the difference between the two is pretty obvious here

32 pixels tall = 160 cm = 5 foot 2. tiny. tiny king

Polar Knight:

--hunched over. like, all the time. --there aren't really any sprites of him not hunched over, but the least hunched over is him doing his shovel up attack, so I'll use that, and his normal sprite for comparison

Normal sprite: 47 pixels tall = 235 cm = 7 foot 8 (!!!) Tall sprite: 58 pixels tall = 290 cm = 9 foot 6 (!!!?!?!?!) tl;dr polar knight is a beast of a man and we all knew that already hahaha. the tallest man on record in medical history was 8 ft 11. This is absolutely bonkers

Shield Knight:

--while she does have hunched over sprites, i simply avoided them lol. --how tall is her head inside her helmet? great question! the world may never know. Since our only reference for this is concept art (which does little more than tells us her head is shaped like a human’s and not, say, a squid’s), I kinda winged the exact pixel count. --also worth noting is that she grows a few inches when she sticks her leg out lol

Normal sprite: 35 pixels = 175 cm = 5 foot 8 (tall but normal height for an adult woman) Tall sprite: 40 pixels = 200 cm = 6 foot 6 (!!!!) (hOLY MAMA beautiful big buff lady)

And just for fun, I added a few other important characters from the main stories:

Mona:

--we know she is a tall lady, but exactly how tall? --all of her sprites seem pretty consistent in height, which makes my job easy!

48 pixels tall = 240 cm = 7 foot 10. (???????!!!?) She is the size of Shovel Knight and Black Knight stacked on top of each other. Amazing. I have nothing but awe and admiration for this incredibly tall lady

Luan:

--He has a bunch of funky tumbling/hunched over sprites and very fluffy hair. like father, like son. I did my best to pick the most reasonable sprites of the bunch --after that, I decided two pixels of hair is enough. voluminous hair is impressive but is not height --similar to Shield Knight, he grows a few inches when he sticks his leg out lol

Normal Sprite: 39 pixels = 195 cm = 6 foot 4 Tall Sprite: 43 pixels = 215 cm = 7 foot 0 (!!) All the better for reaching those hard-to-reach platforms in the Tower of Fate, I guess?

King Knight’s Mom:

--last but not least, the best character in king of cards (you know it's true lol) --she also has somewhat fluffy hair. i'm not counting her bun as height.

41 pixels = 205 cm = 6 foot 8 (!!!). It's not Mona tall, but it's still very tall. Tallness may run in the family, but King Knight seeems to have missed out on all of those genes hahaha.

Special thanks to https://www.spriters-resource.com/pc_computer/shovelknight/ for having all the sprites in one easy place! Thanks for reading!

*disclaimer: I am only human and if I flubbed the math or measurements on any of this, I hope you’ll forgive me. I promise I didn’t mean to slight whichever character was affected

[rpschtuff]

Glitchy Gif Tutorial

I recently learned how to create a simple glitching effect in Photoshop, which involved adapting parts of several different tutorials into something that worked for me. So here’s the simplified version that consolidates all of those! I’ll be walking through creating this gif in Photoshop:

First, create the rest of your image however you like. You should have everything complete before you start, as any changes to your base image will require starting over. This tutorial is designed for an image that’s 540px wide, but it should work with any size with minor adjustments. This one’s mine.

Now, put all of your layers into a group, by selecting all of them and pressing CTRL + G. It’s not necessary, you could just merge it down to a single image, but I prefer keeping it a group in case I have to go back and change something. I’m going to call it Base Image Group.

Make a copy of this group, either by right clicking and hitting Duplicate Group, or by clicking and dragging the group to the New Layer button at the bottom of the layer’s panel.

Then, with the group’s copy selected, press CTRL + E to merge that group into a single layer. I’m going to call this Glitch Image.

Now, make two copies of this Glitch Image, again by right clicking and choosing Duplicate or by dragging the layer to the New Layer button. I’m going to call the new copies Red and Blue, making sure both are on top of the original.

Double click on the Red layer to open the Layer Styles window. Then where it says Channels, uncheck G and B so that only R remains. Then click OK.

With the Red layer still selected, make sure you’re on the selection tool (press V if you’re not), then hold down shift and press the right arrow key. The layer should shift 10 pixels to the right, and create this effect.

With the Red layer still selected, go to Filter > Blur > Motion Blur. Change the Angel to 0 and Distance to 10, then click OK. The red will now have a slight blur to it.

Repeat the process for the Blue layer, except this time uncheck R and G to leave only B, then shift the layer to the left instead of the right. You should now have this effect.

You can play around with different colors and distances and blurs, but most of the time this is my personal favorite look.

Select the Red, Blue, and Glitch Image layers, and press CTRL + E to merge them. Rename it again if you need to.

Now select the Rectangular Marquee Tool (second from the top in the toolbar). Change the Feather in the top bar to 2.

Make a selection across the entire width of your image. It can be as tall as you want.

Hold down CTRL, then use the arrow keys to nudge the selection to the right or left, as far as you like. If you also hold down SHIFT, the selection will nudge by 10 pixels instead of just one, speeding this process up.

Hit CTRL + D to deselect.

Keep repeating this same process across the image, changing the height and direction each time until you have something that’s as warped looking as you want. You’ll probably wind up with something very goofy looking, but that’s alright. This image will be visible for less than half a second in the final gif.

For one last touch! Create a new layer on top of the glitch image, then fill it with solid black. Rename this layer to Static.

With the Static layer selected, go to Filter > Noise > Add Noise. Set Amount to 200, Distribution to Uniform, and make sure Monochromatic is unchecked. Click OK.

Keep the Static layer selected, and go to Filter > Blur > Motion Blur. Set Angle to 0 and Amount to 30. Click OK.

Change the blend mode of this layer to Hard Light and Opacity to 75%.

I’m not a fan of how this looks at the edges. Hit CTRL + T to open up Free Transform.

Hold down ALT and use the center selector on the either the right or left the drag the image outwards until those edges aren’t visible anymore.

Hit ENTER. This is now your glitchy frame.

Now we can start making the glitch animation. Go to Window > Timeline to make sure the animation window is open.

In the layers panel, turn off the Static and Glitch Image layers, by clicking the eye icon next to them. Only the Base Image Group should be visible. Then click Create Frame Animation (if it says Create Video Timeline, use the dropdown next to it find Frame Animation).

This is your animation’s first frame. Click the plus sign at the bottom of the Timeline window to create a copy of the frame.

With this second frame selected, go back to the Layers panel and make the Glitch Image and Static layers visible again. You should now have one frame of the normal image, and one frame of the glitchy image.

On the first frame, open the dropdown that reads 0 sec and change it to 2.

On the second frame, change it to 0.1.

Now select the second frame and click the Tween button. It’s to the left of the plus sign, I think it looks like a comet.

Change Frames to Add to 1 and click OK.

This will add a new frame between the first two that serves as a transition.

Open the timing dropdown on the middle frame and change it to No Delay.

Then click and drag the second frame until its at the end of the sequence.

Click play to preview your gif and make sure you like how it looks. Note that the preview will play slightly slower than the final gif. Also, make sure the dropdown in the bottom left says Forever so that the gif will loop indefinitely.

To export this gif, go to File > Save for Web (or use the keyboard shortcut CTRL + SHIFT + ALT + S). These are my preferred export settings for gifs.

Now you have your finished gif!

There are some variations you can make to this. You could create a second glitchy layer and make it another frame, to have multiple glitches with different timings.

You could add the glitch effect to only a single element, like the subject.

Or the text.

Just play around with it til you have it just the way you like it! I hope this has helped you!

[pathfinderunlocked]

Parmadaemon - CR12 Daemon

This was the main villain of the first arc of my dark fantasy campaign.

Artwork by Wombattree on DeviantArt.

My players probably kinda wish I’d used this art in the campaign, instead of 16-bit pixel art of the black knight from RPG Maker 2000.  Which is what I actually used.

Those Timordaemons that I posted a week and a half ago were created in my campaign when this creature killed random civilians.

It appears to be wearing plate mail, but that’s just its exoskeleton.  There’s nothing inside but fire.  So if your players try to sunder it, give them a knowledge or perception check to figure out that won’t work (or just let it work and remove the natural armor bonus if they deal enough damage, I’m not your mom).

This daemon can transform between a 6-foot-tall (medium) size and a 12-foot-tall (large) size at will, but uses its large size for battle, and is unlikely to appear in front of players as a medium creature unless forced to fight in tight quarters.  I admit that I mostly gave it this ability as an excuse to have a character be revealed as a tiefling/sorcerer descendant of the parmadaemon.  Being smaller isn’t really useful for anything in combat, since if the parmadaemon just needs to move through a small area, it can use its Ashen Form.  It’s just useful for creating offspring with humanoids.  Try not to think too hard about how that works with a creature made of fire, ash, and iron.  I assume Resist Energy is necessary in the bedroom.

Notably, this creature is extremely defensive.  Parties that don’t have a way to get around its damage reduction will have a terrible time trying to hurt it at all.  Aside from its explosive fire breath though, it doesn’t do a ton of damage, and is slow, so it definitely has weaknesses.

Daemons in my setting are each associated with a negative emotion that they both create and feed upon.  The Timordaemon is a daemon of fear, and the Parmadaemon is a daemon of nepotism, feeding on the desires of those who value the power of their family above what is fair or right.  It has 7 unspent languages; give it whatever languages would be most common in your campaign setting.

Unrelatedly, please note that “parma” is Latin for “shield” and has nothing to do with parmesan cheese.

Parmadaemon - CR 12

The being you see before you is suited in massive, thick black armor, holding a tower shield as tall as itself.  A helmet fully obscures where its head should be, but from the slits in the visor, and the gaps between the edges of its plate mail, its form underneath is clearly not that of a person.  Nothing but blazing fire is within its metal frame, and ashy smoke pours from every crack.

XP 12,800 NE Large outsider (daemon, evil, extraplanar, fire) Init +2 Senses darkvision 60 ft., ashwalker, detect relations; Perception +16

DEFENSE

AC 28, touch 11, flat-footed 26 (+2 Dex, +4 shield, +11 natural, -1 size) hp 188 (13d10+117) Fort +17, Ref +6, Will +8 DR 15/good and cold iron Immune acid, bleed, death effects, disease, fire, poison Resist cold 15, electricity 15, force 15, negative energy 15, sonic 15

OFFENSE

Space 10 ft., Reach 10 ft. Speed 20 ft. Melee +1 scimitar +15/+10/+5 (1d8+7/15-20 plus 1d6 bleed and 1d4 burn, DC 15), shield bash +14 (1d8+4 plus 5ft push) or Melee +1 scimitar +19/+14/+9 (1d8+7/15-20 plus 1d6 bleed and 1d4 burn, DC 15) or Melee shield bash +18/+13/+8 (1d8+6 plus 5ft push) Special Attacks breath weapon (20-ft. cone, DC 25, 8d8+10 fire, 1d6+2 round cooldown), ember blade, push (shield bash, 5 ft.), shield of opportunity, tower shield bash Spell-Like Abilities (CL 13th; concentration +14)

Constant—detect relations At will—ashen cloud (see text) 3/day—ash storm (DC 16), quickened dispel magic (self only)

STATISTICS

Str 22, Dex 14, Con 28, Int 12, Wis 10, Cha 16 Base Atk +13; CMB +20 (+22 bull rush); CMD 32 (34 vs. bull rush) Feats Combat Reflexes, Critical Focus, Improved Bull Rush, Power Attack, Tiring Critical, Toughness, Two Weapon Fighting Skills Intimidate +19, Knowledge (local, history, nobility) +17, Linguistics +17, Perception +16, Sense Motive +16 Languages Abyssal, Common, Elven, Draconic, Dwarven, Gnome, Halfling, Orc, Infernal, 7 others; telepathy 100 ft. SQ ashen cloud, ashwalker, size change, quick tower shield cover Gear ember blade (+1 large scimitar, see text) worth 14400 GP, mwk large tower shield

SPECIAL ABILITIES

Ashen Cloud (Sp) As a move action, a parmadaemon can transform itself and all its gear into a cloud of ash. Its natural armor and shield offer no benefits in this form, reducing its AC by 14. The parmadaemon gains DR 20/- and 20 resistance to all energy damage, and becomes immune to sneak attacks and critical hits. It can’t attack, cast spells or spell-like abilities, or use supernatural abilities while in this ashen form, except to dismiss Ashen Cloud.

While in its ashen form, a parmadaemon has a fly speed of 10 feet and automatically succeeds on all Fly checks. It can pass through small holes or narrow openings, even mere cracks, with all it was wearing or holding in its hands, as long as the spell persists. The creature is subject to the effects of wind, and it can’t enter water or other liquid. It also can’t manipulate objects or activate items, even those carried along with its ashen form.

Ashen Cloud lasts until dismissed.  It can be dismissed as a standard action.

A parmadaemon can cast a short-term version of Ashen Cloud as a free action instead of a move action, and does not provoke attacks of opportunity when casting it in this way, but if it does so, the effect ends at the end of its turn.

Treat this as a 3rd level transmutation spell.

Ashwalker (Ex) A parmadaemon is unaffected by difficult terrain and visibility penalties from fog and smoke, including its own Ash Storm spell.

Ember Blade (Ex) A parmadaemon’s scimitar is superheated and jagged.  Its damage die is 2d6 when large or 1d10 when medium, and on a successful hit it also deals 1d6 bleed damage and 1d4 burn damage each round to the target.  A DC 15 Reflex save negates the burn effect (but not the bleed damage).

If a parmadaemon’s ember blade is wielded by a creature other than the parmadaemon, the wielder takes 1d4 fire damage per round.  This scimitar is considered a +1 magic scimitar with a caster level of 13 and a strong evocation aura.

Breath Weapon (Su) Once every 1d6+2 rounds, a parmadaemon can open a section of its armor to produce a 20-foot cone of explosive fire that functions as a breath weapon, dealing 8d8+10 points of fire damage.  A DC 25 Reflex save halves the damage.  The save DC is Constitution-based.

Shield of Opportunity (Ex) A parmadaemon can make an attack of opportunity in response to being hit by a melee attack, but can only use this attack of opportunity to perform a shield bash.  It cannot do this when its tower shield is planted to provide it total cover.

Size Change (Su) As a standard action, a parmadaemon can alter its size between medium and large.  Its gear changes size with it.  When medium-sized, its AC and attack rolls are 1 higher, its CMB and CMD are 1 lower, its scimitar deals 1d10 damage, and its shield bash deals 1d6 damage.  This is a transmutation effect.

Tower Shield Bash (Ex) A parmadaemon can perform a shield bash with its tower shield, dealing 1d8 damage when large-sized or 1d6 damage when medium-sized.  It can perform a 5 ft. push, as the universal monster ability, when it hits with a shield bash.  It cannot perform a shield bash when its tower shield is planted to provide it total cover.

Quick Tower Shield Cover (Ex) A parmadaemon can plant its tower shield to provide it total cover against a single direction until the beginning of its next turn, as normal for a tower shield, but as a move action instead of a standard action.  It can also do this as an immediate action after performing an attack of opportunity with its shield bash.