#EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU TO THE WRITERS FOR HURTING US
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arc 3. That’s it that’s the caption.
#Actually no there’s like a lot to unpack#Like thank GOD the redhead is dead#I’m very very glad Viktor and Jayce had their moments and that the writers made the gay pretty obvious#and « no you won’t »??? Hello?????#I loved the animation too it was fire#Ekko was the best (as always)#also the ekko/heimerdinger duo is so well fitted!!#Everyone say thank you to whoever animated vi and Caitlyn’s s*x scene#Everyone say thank you to whoever wrote the line « now I just want my partner back »#EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU TO THE WRITERS FOR HURTING US#Also the alternate universe where everyone (besides vi) is alive healed sm scars like ekko finally saw benzo again??#arcane season 2 spoilers#vi arcane#arcane season 2#jayvik#viktor arcane#arcane#jayce x viktor#jayce talis#jinx league of legends#heimerdinger#ekkojinx#ekko#caitlyn arcane#caitvi
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SUZU!!! I wanna say that your writing is so NGHH my go-to scaraspice writers 10/10 Can I request balladeer Scara (Like in the official Genshin universe when he's still in the Fatui) breeding us till he's all sweaty and panting? Like they're trying to see if he can actually produce offspring so they just fuck till they find out one day You're amazing, Suzu. Remember to take breaks and care for yourself! Have a great day/night!! <3
fatui!scaramouche x fem!reader. smut. breeding kink. degradation. multiple creampie. feral!scaramouche.
fatui scara has that extra mmm😳 everyone, feel free to listen to animal by magnolia park while reading. and thank you🥺 i am actually terrified of you all losing interest 😅
scaramouche is a man hell bent on one mission. and one mission only.
to fuck a baby inside of you.
he never even gave a shred of thought to such a weak, human need. until he met you. now the thought consumed him. breeding a baby inside of you would be the biggest fuck you to his..creator. abandoned at birth for crying, thought to be inadequate.
it would scream: look at what i did! he could kill two birds with one stone. giving his mother the middle finger, all while taking care of you and fucking you so good until you were dumb and drooling, his cum dripping from your cunt.
how that for inadequacy?!
he wasn't sure how many times his cock ribboned cum inside of you. panting and breathless, he would just reposition you and stuff his cock back inside of you.
flipping you over, he pulled your hips up and smacked your ass before bullying his cock back inside of you from behind. "i promise i'll fucking show her," he groaned, bottoming out with a languid stroke that made your finger nails claw into the sheets, "i'll fuck you so full, your pretty cunt won't be able to hold it all."
his cock made unholy noises squelching in and out of you. you buried your face in the pillows, pushing back against his cock as drool soaked onto the pillow. you'd been stuck in the same blissful cycle for what felt like hours.
your cervix was bound to be bruised, he is fucking you that keep. but you didn't care. the feeling of him devouring you felt too good. he more than made sure you were cumming hard on his cock before filling you. rinse and repeat.
"my lord, please! fuck me harder!" you cried out, breathless from your next orgasm already knotting intensely inside of you. "i can barely breathe!" you managed behind your moans. your overstimulated walls clutched like a glove around his cock.
scaramouche laughed drunkenly hearing you cry out his rightful title as lord. it made his cock pulse harder between your gummy walls. "shh, it's okay, kitten," he purred, grabbing a handful of your hair and yanking your head up.
outside his tent, he was pretty sure his subordinates could hear how good he was fucking you.
you mewled as your walls squeezed tighter on his cock from the rough treatment. his tongue flicked out along the shell of your ear. "you just keep crying for me like a whore while i fuck you fuller," his hips snapped into yours with a vigor that wasn't going to fade.
his body shuddered in pleasure, wishing he could reach down and caress your stomach, feeling the deep buldge of his cock. he has to be thorough so your belly will swell with child.
he drooled at the thought, smacking his hand across your hair. his bangs clung sweaty to his forehead as he pumped his cock inside of you. his body was burning with the ache to cum inside of you more. "i'll fucking knock you up like i promised. make you my wife. how does that sound, slut?" he moaned, pinching and playing with one of your nipples.
he couldn't believe you and your pretty pussy were tempting him to something as human as marriage. but he never felt so sure of something in his life. he is so fucking in love in hurt. it was almost disgusting to him.
you only moaned louder. "please! please, that's what i want. so so much..." you babbled, reaching down to rub your clit to show how badly you want those things. how badly you want him.
your fierce declaration made his cock spurt cum inside of you, a satisfied groan sounding from him as he curved your back down. he groped around on your stomach, pushing on the buldge.
your orgasm jolted through you, tearing a near scream of pleasure from your throat. your body felt limp, your walls fluttering around his cock as he fucked his cum relentlessly up inside of you. he batted your hand away from your clit.
he delivered a soothing pinch before circling his thumb around the swollen bud. pulling out half way, your toes curled as he slowly pushed himself back in. "another. it isn't enough," he hissed, hastily pulling out and rolling you over onto your back.
you were trembling, and exhausted. lost in a haze of fucked out bliss. you nodded, barely able to sit up and place a few, submissive licks on his mouth. an action that made his cock harder.
you dedicated yourself to pleasing him with every fiber of his being. because he deserves it. he knew he deserved it. that much was evident as he smirked down at you.
rest assured he will have fucked you full five more times before you took that first pregnancy test.
#genshin impact#genshin smut#fem!reader#genshin imagines#scaramouche#scaramouche smut#scaramouche x reader#scaramouche x y/n#scaramouche x you
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MERTHUR WEEK 2024
☀️STARTING December 18th - 24th🌑
merthurweek 2024 has risen😈 and as always, i can't wait to see what brilliant creations everyone makes!! i love you all. thank you for allowing me to do this each year!! it’s officially just me this year in name🩷
have fun and enjoy!!💥
FOR FANFIC OR META WRITERS - prompts and/or themes for inspiration:
day one: quest(s) + angst
day two: court sorcerer!merlin + protective!others
day three: hate at first sight + hurt/comfort
day four: “what is that?!” + humor
day five: bamf!merlin + angst with a happy ending
day six: "it wasn’t meant to end this way" + dragons
day seven: magic reveal + canon era
there is an ao3 collection under the name which can be found here 'merthurweek2024’
if you wish to add your fics please put the day and prompt in your summary if posting to ao3.
reminder: merlin/arthur do not need to be the one to say the line or be the things exactly! and the + means and/or. these are mostly for inspiration alone. if you would like to just write modern royalty for day one, for example, and not use angst, then that's perfectly fine.
FOR GIFS/ VIDEO/ ART CREATORS - ideas and/or themes for inspiration:
day one: friends of/with merthur + red color palette (#740938 / #AF1740 / #CC2B52 / #DE7C7D)
day two: any song + orange color palette (#FF885B / #FFE5CF / #557C56 / #33372C)
day three: symbolism + yellow color palette (#FEFFD2 / #FFEEA9 / #FFBF78 / #FF7D29)
day four: favorite parallel(s) + green color palette (#1A1A19 / #31511E / #859F3D / #F6FCDF)
day five: why do you still love merlin in 2024? + blue color palette (#DFF2EB / #B9E5E8 / #7AB2D3 / #4A628A)
day six: any quote + purple color palette (#1A1A1D / #3B1C32 / #6A1E55 / #A64D79)
day seven: what went wrong? + white color palette (#F9F5F6 / #F8E8EE / #FDCEDF / #F2BED1)
Rules:
must be posted on tumblr so i can reblog!
please tag your posts as #merthurweek2024 and/or tag this account directly.
NSFW is allowed, just please tag appropriately.
have fun and enjoy yourself! this week is all about supporting each other and sharing your work!
questions, concerns, or just wanna talk? you can dm or send asks at this account or my main @bellamyblakru
#merthurweek2024#merthur#merthurweek#bbc merlin#merlingifs#merlin events#merlin fests#fests#admin ashley#signal boost#userdorksinlove#xuserann#alielook#merlin#arthur pendragon#merlin x arthur#merlin bbc#merlin emrys#i made a gif for this post and the header and i havent made gifs in a HOT minute lolol sorry if they suck i was going fast and im tired
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how do you think jealous glinda would act
JEALOUS GALINDA HEADCANNONS
warnings : none!
author’s note : this got me out of my writers block ( FREAKING FINALLY ) so thank you anon!
⭑ galinda loves being the centre of attention, loves it, especially when she gets to be the centre of your attention. she’s not used to not getting what she wants, not used to not being the sun, the moon, the planets, and stars in everyone’s galaxy, so the idea of her having to share your attention with anyone else is such a foreign concept to her
⭑ galinda, who always wants to hang out with you! she wants to study together ( though it’s mostly you working and her staring at you with big goo goo eyes because you look so pretty when you’re concentrating! ) or going on super elaborate dates she’s planned out, or just hanging out in her dorm and kissing until she can’t stop giggling
⭑ so when you start to hang out with someone else just a tad bit more than you do her, like maybe you eat lunch with some your classmates instead of going off with her, or if you say you can’t come over that night because you’re hanging out with someone else, she freaks out!
⭑ why don’t you wanna hang out with her anymore? did she do something wrong? was she a bad girlfriend? did she hurt your feelings? elphaba finds her in bed curled up in ball with her knees tucked up to her chest, overthinking every little thing the two of you have ever done, trying to figure out why you might be mad at her
⭑ spoiler alert! you’re not mad! she’s just a chronic overthinker who can’t go a day without getting to hold your hand and kiss you
⭑ the moment you come over next she’s bawling in your arms and begging for you to forgive her because she doesn’t understand why you’re mad and she’s sorry if she hurt your feelings! she’s so not used to feeling so strongly about someone and she doesn’t want to mess a single thing up
⭑ in an instant you’re cuddling her and kissing her face and insisting she didn’t do anything wrong, and that she’s been nothing but the most amazing girlfriend imaginable! you just wanted to spend some time with your other friends, that’s all! you don’t love her any less
⭑ she’s all pouty and red in the face and somehow as elegant and pretty as ever, maybe even more, when she looks up at you
“galinda, what are you talking about? you are nothing short of the most amazing girlfriend on the planet! just because we’re not spending every second of every day together doesn’t mean i love you any less”
“you p - p - promise?”
⭑ galinda tries not to be super clingy after that, tries to teach herself that just because you’re hanging out with your friends or you’re not sleeping over every night, that it doesn’t mean you don’t care about her or what to break up, tries to teach herself that she doesn’t need to be always be the centre of attention. she’s still learning! it’s her first time being a relationship that she really does care about
⭑ of course she can only handle so much, it’s hard not to be clingy and possessive when she sees someone blatantly flirting with you! you’re her girlfriend after all!
⭑ the moment someone touches your arm sweetly or compliments your hair or clothes in a definitively not platonic way, she’s practically appearing at your side, arms wrapped around your waist with her face nuzzled into your shoulder
⭑ she’s constantly kissing your cheek, snuggling up against you, squeezing your hand, and repeating the word ‘girlfriend’ over and over until whoever decided they had the right to even breathe in the direction of you awkwardly wanders off
“oh! i don’t believe we’ve met, i’m galinda upland, her GIRLFRIEND!” “i was just in the bathroom, hope i didn’t keep my GIRLFRIEND waiting for too long!” “thanks for taking such good care of my GIRLFRIEND, but i can take it from here, as i am her GIRLFRIEND, and she is my GIRLFRIEND”
⭑ she doesn’t leave your side for the rest of the night, flipping her hair in the direction of ( and maybe even into the face of ) anyone who tries to hit on you. you’re her girlfriend! not theirs!
⭑ she can’t help but feel insecure though, her face is a nervous mix between a scowl and a pout for most of the night, constantly squeezing your hand as if to remind herself that you’re very much still there, that you haven’t left her for someone else
⭑ it’s not until she drags you back to her dorm does she break down, blubbering about how she’s worried about ‘not being good enough’ and how ‘everyone who hit on you was so much sexier and cooler than her’ and how ‘she’s not even that good of a girlfriend because she doesn’t know what she’s doing! but she doesn’t want to screw anything up!’
⭑ you’re barely able to calm her down, let alone pull her into your arms and lead her over towards her bed
“ssh, sh, hey, hey, galinda look at me. nobody at that stupid party was as cool or sexy or amazing as you are. you are the brightest, most wonderful person i’ve ever met, and i’d be an idiot to even consider dumping you for some dumb guy or girl who tries to hit on me. you don’t have to be perfect, nobodies perfect baby, but you are damn well pretty close. i love galinda upland, nothings gonna change that”
⭑ somehow that made her cry more! not out of sadness but just because she’s so overwhelmed with joy and love because you love her and you think she’s perfect and pretty and sexy and amazing, and it made her heart flutter in her chest so hard she’s worried it’ll explode
⭑ she flops right against you, burying her face into your shoulder and mumbling ‘i love you’ over and over and over until she finally stops crying, and by then you’re both exhausted
⭑ you end up spending the night at hers, galinda tucked against your chest your face buried in her hair, arms cradling her protectively
⭑ she ends up staying awake long after you’ve fallen asleep. titling her head up just so, watching and listening to you breathe because you’re the most gorgeous creature on earth and she’s the one who gets to lay against you like this, and she’s not sure something else has ever made her happier
#🖊️ harleen writes#wicked#wicked x reader#wicked 2024#wicked broadway#galinda upland#galinda upland x reader#glinda upland x reader#glinda upland#madmaxified#ariana grande#ariana grande x reader#wicked spoilers#fem reader#lesbian#wlw#x reader
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✐ᝰ "You knew all too well i was right where you left me" | CL16 ࣪𓏲ּ ᥫ᭡ ₊
parings: retired!charles leclerc x writer!ex!reader
series summary: It’s the story of a woman frozen in the moment her world fell apart. A perfect dinner ended with, “I met someone else,” and while everyone moved on, she remained stuck in that instant, unable to let go of the past. A poignant tale of heartbreak, grief, and the weight of being trapped in a “forever” that never was.
🔎 chapter one: “love is short but forgetting is so long”
🔎 chapter two: “did the love affair mail you too?”
🔎 chapter three: “you kept me like a secret but I kept you like an oath”
chapter four: “help, I’m still at the restaurant” -> chapter five
‼️ best friends in this chapter: nikola (nik) , dorothy (dottie) and beatrice (betty). They all know each other from Oxford University where the four of them studied creative writing.
word count: +5,1k.
BLOG MASTERLIST - series masterlist
⋆˚࿔ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
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agostinabff: hope you have a lovely week off mon amour!! You deserve it. We love you 💘
↳ yourusername: thank u for being the best part of my life 💌
y/nstan: omg GIRL we are the same person wtf 😭
user4: who is he and where can i find him to KILL HIM?????
nikolabff: is my air bnb recommendation good enough ????? (That looks disgusting, uber eats exists darling)
nikolabff: can't wait for tomorrow!! London should be scared of us 😈
nikolabff: did dorothy call you? She isn't answering my calls
↳ yourusername: babes!!!! Aaaaaa i'm so excited. I just ended call with dottie. She arrived safe and well, i missed you guys so much 😭 did betty text you?
↳ nikolabff: tbh she didn't but you know how she is. can't wait to see you all tomorrow!!
arthurleclerc: hey y/n i know this may be weird but just wanted to say, i read your book and it is amazing! my brother was an idiot you know? you are an amazimg person im sure you'll find someone who loves you deeply (if you didn't already. maybe you did) okay, i don't bother you any longer. hope we can meet again someday!
⋆˚࿔ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
⋆˚࿔ a week ago 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
“There'll be happiness after you, but there was happiness because of you. Both of these things can be true. There is happiness, past the blood and bruise, past the curses and cries. Beyond the terror in the nightfall haunted by the look in my eyes that would've loved you for a lifetime and leave it all behind. Tell me, when did your winning smile begin to look like a smirk? When did all our lessons start to look like weapons pointed at my deepest hurt? I hope she'll be a beautiful fool who takes my spot next to you. No, I didn't mean that. Sorry, I can't see facts through all of my fury. You haven't met the new me yet” you read that piece out loud from your personal journal to your therapist. She stayed silent for a while. You looked over at her knowing you skipped some parts but what you read in the end sank in.
“I think there’s a lot to discuss from just that single piece you wrote. But I wanna ask you something before anything else: do you really believe there will be happiness after him?” your therapist made you a question that felt like daggers pinching you that resulted in leaving you breathless for a few seconds. you loved and hated therapy for this reason. There were things you couldn’t question by yourself because you never thought about it and things you didn’t know how to answer like this one.
“I wish I could say yes. But i don't think i’ve been happy since he left” saying that out loud hurt yourself even more. It was not something easy to admit and accept. But it was the truth. You have never felt really happy since then.
She nodded, writing down in her notebook “but do you believe you can be happy without him? Why is he still so important or has so much space in your life that you can't be happy if he isn’t there? Why were you happy when he was with you?” as always, too many questions with so few answers. You felt exhausted, frustrated by the fact you didn't know what to think about it all.
“I'm sure I want to be happy, I can't live like this anymore. I'm tired” you assured her and yourself. You took a few seconds to think and she respected that. “I guess if I want to then I can, right? I mean, I talk to my friends and all of them tell me time and time again ‘don't let what happened define you’ and I try but I don't know why it is really hard for me” you explained looking at the floor.
“And what’s that definition of yourself?”
“That i'm not worthy of love i guess. that there will always be someone better than me, more attractive, more lovable, more interesting. I can't be the one, for anyone” admitting it felt like an elephant stepped on you and you just died in the act. Your therapist, Maria, nodded looking at you.
“Well, but in what you wrote you tell this woman he left you for, that you hope she is a fool like you, right?” she intervened. You nodded. “What can you tell me about it?”
You looked at your hands a bit sweaty. “I really don’t know. I mean her existence made me compare myself to her. She is so different. It made me feel all of those things I said before. And maybe i blamed her existence because if she didn't existed then, charles would still be here”
“You think so?”
“I guess, yeah” you looked at her. She wrote down more stuff on that notebook you were so intrigued by.
“So, for you, there doesn't exist the possibility that maybe he just stopped loving you? Like even if she existed or not - could be any other woman or could be no one at all. Would it hurt more if he just stopped loving you?” you felt your brain make a 180 turn on itself.
“I don’t know. Maybe, yeah, I mean. I Think it’s easier to blame someone then not have an explanation for it” your therapist nodded.
“So, why would she occupy your same place then? If you are different from each other, why would she be just like you? As a replacement it seems and at the same time who’s at fault for all of this situation and insecurities. And before you answer, I think we can connect that to what happened between your dad and mom, right?” she saw your face so confused she knew this was gonna be the end of the session so you could think about it during the next two weeks. “You told me you discovered your dad cheated on your mom. So all you ever dreamed was to find someone who would be better than him, to prove yourself that that isn’t your destiny, just like your mom. And then Charles left you for this other girl. And everything you built up in your mind to try to believe in love and to escape from the reality you had to live through, then it crumbled down in that instant. Leaving you feeling like there was no way you could be worthy of love, because you tried but Charles did exactly what your dad did to your mother. And since then you couldn’t date anyone else. This is a theory, I'm not saying it is what it is of course. But it seems that if they didn't exist then you wouldn’t be this hurt and maybe forgive charles,as you said when you wrote ‘and leave it all behind’ just like your mom did with your dad”
Her words echoed in your head for a while. The knot in your throat intensified. “Charles was my everything just like my parents were. And after what happened, with Charles and my dad, I guess I let that define me. I wanted to show myself that the love i’ve seen in books and movies existed, not like in my house. I wanted to make things right. In a way, to mend what hurt me the most. The betrayal of my dad. So I put Charles under that pressure and maybe that made things the way they went down. I don’t know to be honest. I don’t know why I want alexandra to be like me. Maybe that’s another way of convincing myself I'm not the only fool in this mess.”
“I don’t think you are a fool. Relationships are complicated and the reason he decided to leave could be based on a million reasons, and even in that situation. Maybe any of them are because of you or who you are as a person. People are complex and most times messy. Feelings aren’t easy to control or understand” she explained to you. “So, coming back to this new encounter you had with him, how did you feel about it?”
“It felt weird, very uncomfortable to be around him. But at the same time a force drove me closer to him. I wanted to be closer. Ask him everything and at the same time punch him. He felt the same to be honest. Just like the previous day he left, when everything was alright.” you pulled a face you didn't know how to describe at that moment.
“And you felt the same?”
“No i think, i didn’t” she nodded and half smiled at my answer.
“Then, what’s the new you he didn’t meet?”
“Who i am now i guess”
“And who are you?” her question made you realize you didn’t know how to answer that question yet. You knew you were different, because you felt different although stuck dealing with the aftermath of that relationship. She noticed your silence (because she knew all too well you didn’t know how to answer it) and smiled gently.
“Alright, y/N. Let’s leave it here and continue next session, okay? See you in two weeks”
Who the fuck were you now?
⋆˚࿔ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
Mornings at your balcony were your favorite moment during the day. Your coffee was warm and comforting on a grey and windy day. You were covered in clothes and blankets. You needed that moment anyway. You wouldn’t let the winter win. You watched your neighbor cleaning his living room. He had his window opened so you could see a bit of what he was doing. However, you didn't see him very well because you didn't have your glasses on so it’s a bit blurry. You thought there was someone else with him. Probably a girl.but you weren’t that interested.the only thing you hated about your balcony was the fact that the view was partially blocked by that damn house up the hill.
After a while, you took your stuff and went into your house again. You felt warmer instantly. You left the blankets on the coach and washed up what you used to have for breakfast a few minutes ago. You had to pack as soon as possible. On saturday, you travel to london to see your college friends and also because your friend franco, another formula one driver you met by chance at a college party, it was his birthday party. You wanted that week to be a good one. Be a week you genuinely enjoy and just be happy.
But after everything that happened the last month around Charles, it was really difficult. Your therapist was a really good help of course. But you hated not knowing how to handle all of these feelings you didn’t understand and that paralyze you.
You only had one phrase in your head: ‘no one teaches you what to do when a good man hurts you’.
You couldn’t think of Charles as a bad man, or person or anything. Yes, he was stupid. And he destroyed your self esteem. And your trust. And yes, you still were kind of stuck in that restaurant. But you also had some kind of responsibility. And that also troubled you a lot.
Your self esteem shouldn’t be defined by anyone else but you. What do you think about yourself? Who are you? That was your fault. You didn’t know how that would affect destiny for him to leave you but well, it is what it is yet. You kind of thought that maybe it’s the price you had to pay for putting him in a role he didn't want to be in. maybe you were too much. Too intense. Too dependent. He only wanted someone to talk and have fun with. But you wanted a good husband at 18, and a good father, and the one who would take away your pain and fix your traumas.
Maybe he wasn’t the only one who hurt someone, but you also hurt him in some way.
Ten years in, and you still couldn’t explain what happened. What did you do or not do for him to stop loving you? Or perhaps you can actually stop loving someone but you didn't experience it yet.
You sighed, reaching your travelling suitcase from on top of your closet. You almost fell so you had to grab a chair from your kitchen. You loved travelling but packing was a nightmare (also, because you couldn’t decide which outfits were good so you had to take two suitcases and pay extra everytime. Not that you didn't have the money and it was a problem. But you knew it was an unnecessary spend).
That’s when you remembered how it was like to travel with charles. And you hated yourself for remembering his stupid laugh so cute it made your heart melt every time. Would he still laugh like that? Maybe it was best not to know it.
If you were younger and he came back, you’d probably forgive him and leave it all behind just to be happy with him. But now, you wanted to leave everything behind: him, his family, the memories, the feelings, the hurt. And maybe that is what changed.
That was the new you.
⋆˚࿔ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
Your laugh was so liberating. Your hair was free in the wind. He was driving through the Monaco coast. It was finally summer break and you decided to have a picnic at the beach. His hand on your tight. David Guetta on the radio. You were singing along without a care in the world.
Your fingers brushed his hand making him look at you through his sun glasses in a beautiful cute smile.
“You look gorgeous, cherie” you saw his lips pronounce those words in slow motion, feeling your every fiber get wild inside you. Your smile was so big and your cheeks pink. He could melt forever just to see you this happy. You wanted to freeze those moments with him and live in them forever.
“I love you, Charles,” you said so warmly and softly. It was your romance movie playing over and over again. That’s how you felt. But when he heard you say those words, his face turned serious. Almost pulled a face of disgust. For some reason you got so scared you wanted to jump out of the car to save your life.
You wanted to save your life.
He noticed you wanted to escape so he tightened his grip on you tightly, hurting you but he wasn’t letting you go away.
“Charles, let go of me” you said almost in a whisper. Your breath was fast. You needed to jump. You started fighting so he would let you go.
“Stop, cherie. We’re gonna have our happily ever after, isn’t that what you wanted?” he said, trying to drive and grab you at the same time. You started crying not knowing what to answer. The anxiety took over you.
“You said you loved me cherie, you can’t go now” he was crying and let go of the steering wheel. You got desperate seeing the car had no control and you were at the Monaco cliffs.
“Charles! CHARLES!” you screamed from the top of your lungs as you watched both of you exiting the driveway into nowhere. All the sea around you. Slow motion Charles looked at you with a huge smile.
“Happily ever after baby” he said and you looked horrorized. But when you were about to scream again as if that would change anything.
Everything went black.
You woke up drowning in cold sweat and tears. Your heart was beating too fast for your liking. The feeling you had in that moment of pure confusion was scared to death. For a moment you didn’t know if you were alive or dead. Your room was pitch black so it kinda felt like you died. But you were thinking and you thought there was no way you could think when dead, so you were alive.
After a few seconds of paralysis, you react and turn on your light from your bed table. You took a deep breath and scrubbed your face to wake yourself up. Your face was wet still from your tears. The moment you were conscious again you felt defeated. It was the third time in the night you were having this kind of nightmares, now three days in a row. You laid back again in bed for a moment.frustration was all over your face. You were so tired of living like this. Yet, you didn’t know how to stop. You grabbed your phone to see what time it was. It showed 5:46 am. You snarled, hating your brain more than anything in the world.
You got up from bed and went straight to the bathroom to wash your face. You knew all too well you couldn’t be able to fall asleep again nor you wanted to. It has been a terrible night already. So you let your brain win once again.
You went downstairs to your studio where it was warm. Sun isn't out yet, so here you’ll be warmer. If not, you probably would have chosen the balcony as always. Or the restaurant, although you haven't come back to it since the last encounter with charles. You just didn’t want to go back there ever again. Just like the time he left.
You sat on your chair at your desk. Eyes tired. You opened your journal. You didn’t remember writing so much like in the past week or so. But you had so many thoughts to write sometimes it got difficult for you to function properly. You just had to stay at home writing non-stop. Not only your upcoming book but your feelings. After the dream you had, a lot must be processed.
I know I'm probably better off on my own than loving a man who didn't know what he had. And I see the permanent damage he did to me.
Never again.
I just wish I could forget when it was magic.
But I also just wish you could’ve been a better man.
You sighed reading your words again on paper. You felt worried about yourself. Like, maybe you were broken and couldn’t ever be fixed. You were scared that you wouldn’t be able to fix yourself back up again. Or even thinking that maybe you were born broken so how could you fix yourself then? You were scared there was no way out of this pain, agony, self hatred, nightmare you have lived these past years… or your whole life. You dreamed about being in love again with someone so different from charles yet maybe who makes you feel the same high. Or maybe higher erasing every trace of him or memory of your dad. Now lines were blurry. You didn’t want to think about your dad, not only because he was gone and you couldn’t do anything about it, but because it felt weird linking him in some way to charles, but if your therapist said so, maybe you were more troubled than you thought.
Would there be a good guy? Do they even exist? You guessed you’ve never met one of them yet.
I hold onto this pride because, these days, it's all I have. And I gave you my best, and we both know you can't say the same.
Were you writing about him? Or about your dad?
You stared at the wall thinking about the answer that never came around.
Just like the both of them did when it came to you.
⋆˚࿔ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
It was 10 am in the morning already. You didn’t sleep a bit. You’ve been in a zoom meeting since 8. Talks about the movie in the making were held. Casting started so they sent you a few ones they think are perfect for the roles so you have to watch them after the meeting. Also, they go through the aesthetic and changes they will make from the book, and that’s why this meeting has been so long. They needed to discuss everything with you to make sure you agreed. They wanted to be respectful with your work and you appreciate it very much. It made you feel important. In other news, they thought that taylor swift could make the soundtrack for the movie and you got very excited about it. You loved Taylor's songwriting and believed (and were almost sure) she would make the perfect song for the movie.
It was gonna be a long day ahead, full of work and watching hours of footage from castings. But it was for your dream. You still couldn’t believe you had your book be a movie in the making. It still feels surreal.
Then you remembered charles’ ex followed you and liked your posts. And you were mad at him again. You were sure (no doubts at all for real), she didn't know who you were. Because he kept you buried like you were sin.
A part of you wanted to believe he did it because he knew he fucked up and didn’t want people to judge him for his lack of sympathy towards his last lover. But at the same time you just found it cruel behavior with no reason at all to do that. You kinda felt dirty as if you were bad. Very bad. Banned from his life.
You shook your head, getting yourself back to the present time and starting working again. Your lack of rest doesn't help in getting distracted with thought every minute but you were doing the best you could. Plus, work helps you not to think about anything else. And that’s good.
You really needed a break from thinking.
⋆˚࿔ finally the london trip arrived 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
yourusername made a post
liked by nikolabff, beatricebff, francolapinto, landonorris and 678,435 others
yourusername: first few days back in london = first few days of happiness ❤️🩹
tagged: @nikolabff , @beatricebff , @dorothybff and @francolapinto
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user345: girl is happy we are happy
user3: omg such QUEENS
↳ francolapinto: i guess ur not talking about me
↳ user3: oh im so talking about you too
↳ francolapinto: 🤨
nikolebff: the girls girled
dorothybff: happy looks very hot on you darling 🫦
beatricebff: can you kiss already??????
↳ yourusername: no ❤️
nikolabff: gossip so good bro was giggling and kicking his feet
↳ francolapinto: it was indeed
↳ alexalbon: better bring that gossip to the paddok asap
↳ yourusername: it's CONFIDENTIAL
↳ alexalbon: booooooo ur so boring
↳ oscarpiastri: i wanna be part of this group please
↳ nikolabff: yes you can sir
↳ francolapinto: i thought no one else was allowed
↳ nikolabff: stfu 🩷
User231: i love this crossover of y/n and formula 1 drivers. I would've never expected it tbh
↳ franstan: same!!! I love it!! Didn't know she was friends with franco
↳ user354: i think they met a few years ago, y/n was asked about it on insta questions and she said they met randomly at a college party
↳ franstan: interesting
User1: girl!!! You look so good omg
francolapinto: te amo amiga so happy to see you happy ❤️🩹
↳ yourusername: te amo tambien ❤️🩹
↳ user778: EXCUSE YOU ???????
↳ franstan7: OMG OMG OMG
user4: WHAT IS HAPPENING ?
user324: so no one is gonna talk about lando world champion fucking norris being on the likes ????? 🤨🤨🤨🤨
↳ landostan: that was what i was thinking
⋆˚࿔ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
⋆˚࿔ finally the london trip arrived 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
Laughter was all over the place as well as a lot of bottles of alcohol with names you haven’t seen in your life. It was finally Saturday night, which meant it was Franco's birthday celebration. And because it was his birthday of course all the decorations were argentina flags everywhere and boca junior club t-shirts for everyone, including you. As you got to his house you were given one at the door to wear it. Fortunately, for you it didn’t ruin your outfit and I could say it looked great on you. Or well, that’s what franco said to you while preparing you a drink you haven’t ever tried before. He said it was called fernet with coke. You were already a bit drunk because you were drinking vodka with the girls while getting ready. You didn’t like vodka that much but after everything that happened in your life, you kinda felt the urge to drown in vodka or tequila. Mi gente latino music was playing non-stop. You knew Franco loved duki and bizarrap, and they were actually at the party. You couldn’t talk to them yet. So everything was a bit crazy even if you weren’t that many people. He was just a close friend to franco. So i guess it was like 60 people. Way too many people to be honest but for a famous 2 times world champion it was really a small amount of people so it was super intimate.
“There you go, hermosa” he said, handing you the glass full of black liquid. You looked at it a bit worried in a funny way and grabbed it. He let out a cute laugh. “Try it, you’re gonna like it, i promise” he encouraged you. He couldn’t resist the view of you with that boca juniors on. Probably, the combination of you and that was his heaven made on earth. He was really down for you, since it felt like forever. Probably since that night at that party back 6 years ago or so. You always have a different light that anyone can match. and that’s what he liked most about you along with your authenticity. You were so unique to him. He looked at you biting his lip a little trying not to be so obvious.
You tried the drink looking into his eyes. You were really close but you felt really comfortable. Your friends have left you alone with him the minute he came forward to you, of course. They really believed you could work out with him. And after vodka and long talks about it with them, maybe you would give it a try. But it scared you, you didn’t want to use him as a friend. So it was a risky situation in your opinion. Although, you could see he liked you for a long time now. And you found him funny and really attractive in your opinion. You give it a few more sips to taste it fully. “Oh I think I like it,” you said, giving him a funny smile.
“I told you. I’m the best fernet preparer in this whole country… and also, I did it with love just for you” he said, making you laugh and blush after the last sentence he said.
“I’m sure it’s the love you put in it” you gave it another sip looking at him. His face turned red and let out such a cute giggle. Alcohol was making you melt for your best friend? We guess so.
He got closer grabbing your waist and planted a sweet kiss on your cheek making you nervous as you never felt for a long time. However, it felt weird. Maybe as if this shouldn’t be happening.
⋆˚࿔ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
Franco’s house was enormous. The party was being held at the gallery near his garden. It was cold but the lights and the people stuck to each other made it warmer. You were with your girls again dancing to bad bunny and los del espacio songs. You didn’t understand a word because Spanish was definitely not your talent. You tried to learn because of Franco, and he tried to teach you, but failed every time. You did learn a few words anyway but speaking fluidly was something you won’t ever do. Or that’s what you thought about it. It was your third fernet. You didn’t know it was so good. Also it could make you so drunk. And you were way too drunk by now but you never felt so happy. You were laughing about anything and everything. Dancing without a care in the world. Enjoying being surrounded by your friends. Charles wasn’t on your mind nor any trace of him or his family or the history behind you two. Memories have faded away, washed by the alcohol in your veins. You didn’t remember having so much fun since forever. Your girls were right. Life was so much more than Charles, you were so much more than what you were with him. And all of this you have it because of you and you alone. In that moment you felt liberated. Free from the curse it was put on you. Free of judgment. Free of insecurities. Until you saw that damn mullet and when it turned around you felt kind of speechless. Your eyes locked in that man you didn’t know but he was so hypnotic. You couldn’t stop looking at him.
“Girl! Close your mouth, you're drooling! Is it for franco, huh?” Nikola joked when she saw you like that, making you laugh while shaking your head.
“No it isn’t girls, is that guy over there i don’t know who he is but he is so beautiful” you said pointing your finger in his direction unconsciously. Because when you looked at him again he was looking at you straight in the eyes. You almost freaked out and ran away from there. His fucking smile. What the hell is happening to you? Your friends looked over at him as well with no simulation at all. The four of you were pretty obvious. And that’s when another guy turned around to see where his mate was looking over with that face. Nikola almost fell to the floor.
She turned around freaked out, making all of you stop looking at them so weird. Alcohol makes you behave so embarrassing for your liking.
“Holy shit girls, it’s oscar fucking piastri and lando norris” her eyes were leaving her face for a bit. You grabbed her arms still confused. You didn’t know them but you heard nik talking about that oscar a few times. Betty and Dottie looked over at them again but they were gone.
“Okay they are gone nik” dottie said. Betty took a sip from her drink. You wanted to say something but you felt someone grab your waist from behind and kiss your head.
“Hello ladies” of course it had to be franco. You smiled nervously looking at your friends. One of your hands placed over Franco's arms not wanting him to let go. You liked it. Or that’s what you drowned in alcohol though about it.
“Hello mister, i guess we will grab more drinks at the bar, goodbye bye byeee” Betty said, taking her two girls with her leaving you alone with franco. You laughed and resigned. Nik gave franco a warning sign ‘im watching you’ making franco laugh too. And they disappeared through the people dancing and talking.
He kissed your cheek letting you go a bit so you could turn around to face him. “Hey handsome, where have you been? Are you having fun?” you said surrounding his neck with your arms and he did the same around your waist. He nodded in a smile.
“Now that I'm back with you, I'm really having fun,” he said cheeky.
“Oh shut up” you said rolling your eyes funny because of his flirty side.
“Hey, I'm telling the truth. I was with my school friends though ,they came from home” he told you and made you smile while stroking the curls on his head gently. Your fingers in his hair sent shivers down his spine. He couldn’t stop looking at your lips and you noticed. But you liked it so you let him.
“I’m happy you’re enjoying your night fran. You deserve all of this love, world champion” you said sweetly looking at his eyes so shiny and deep green right now. Your words made him melt.
And there were you, the girl who can win over the man known for being the most professional at flirting. You always win with him. He is so down bad for you he felt stupid. You were so beautiful in his eyes. So amazing. He hated Charles so much. He even celebrated when he retired. They couldn't even pretend to like each other and actually it was one of the most famous feuds between drivers in the history of the sport. Franco just couldn’t comment anything positive about charles. Even if he tried he just couldn’t. The most infamous moment was when Charles won his first championship and he was asked about it. He said he didn’t want to comment about it because he had nothing to comment about. So franco started to be known as the guy who was nice to everyone except for charles leclerc. And it was hilarious to see because no one knew why. And the why was always you.
Franco wanted to have you and couldn’t. Charles had left you alone and destroyed another woman. How could he? Franco took that as an insult. You were an amazing woman. The most amazing woman he has ever met and that asshole did that to you. He just couldn’t stand him. Breathing the same air as Charles was unbearable for him.
All of these thoughts rambling around and neither of you didn’t realize you were kissing already. Your lips melting into each other in the sweetest and softest kiss you have ever had. Even better than any kiss Charles could have given you before. You hated yourself for comparing every guy in your life with Charles, but you couldn’t help it. But this felt different. It was sweet but at the same time it felt so wrong.
But you couldn’t stop.
And you didn’t want to.
⋆˚࿔ TO BE CONTINUED 𝜗𝜚˚⋆
chapter fiver: here.
author's note: things are getting complicated around here!!!
tag list: : @a-beaverhausen , @priniya , @annaluna12 , @thehoplessromanticclub , @emryb , @hadids-world , @kaztheemyth , @freyathehuntress , @diorbrxtz , @theseerbetweenus , @sie17136 , @leila-030304 , @charlesgirl16 , @ricciardosheart , @weekendlusting
#𐔌 . ⋮ katiascraft .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱#works by cate :)#f1#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 fic#f1 x female reader#f1 fanfic#franco colapinto#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc angst#franco colapinto x femreader#franco colapinto x you#franco colapinto x reader#cl16 x y/n#cl16 x you#cl16 x reader#cl16 fic#cl16#fc43 x reader#fc43 x you#fc43
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cliché gone wrong
jinx x fem!reader
summary: you lose your mind in jealousy and give into your most hidden desires.
notes: nsfw, modern au. wc 2,3k. no proofread just lazy writing, enjoy ! 😊
ཻུ۪۪ ༄࿐༉⁎ ⁺
sometimes things get really messy. it was like a glitch in the matrix. a weird turn of events thanks to the writer who thought it was a good idea to work under the influence.
ekko wasn’t all that charming, sure he was handsome and knew his way around women. but it was only thanks to you and jinx. he would never give you credit, though.
when he arrived to the neighborhood, you and jinx quickly befriended him without any hesitation. the three of you were the same young age of 11 and full of energy to burn by playing together for hours.
until you reached puberty, that is.
you personally never felt attracted to other boys, not like your classmates talked about. the hot topic was who was more handsome and funny, dumb tutorials on how to get a boyfriend… suddenly everyone was getting their first kisses, except you.
and it made you feel left out. but you didn’t want to kiss any boy. or… any boy, for that matter. but you still didn’t gave much thought to that.
so you turned to jinx for a girl talk. hoping to hear her say that it was dumb to think about that romantic stuff. oh your surprise when she actually admits having kissed ekko, “just to satisfy her curiosity” she said.
was it supposed to hurt like that? your heart scrunched in your chest and you felt like locking yourself in your room and never leaving again. and you confused these feelings, awfully wrong.
because it was normal to fall for your friend. your opposite sex friend. you genuinely thought that all that jealousy and hurt you felt was because you liked ekko, and that jinx took him from you.
the three of you got tangled in a strange situation where jinx and you fought each other for this boy’s attention. hence the love triangle cliché.
it’s been years, and things only grew. for better or worse.
it was almost a routine, you bicker with jinx, she barks back and ekko just stands in the middle wearing the most annoying grin on his face. he behaved like a man. proudly talking about the differences on each of your kisses, touches, flirts and moves. at first it made you burn with anger. over the years you stopped caring.
it wasn’t important to have him anymore, but to win.
and you were sure jinx didn’t care about him either. not when she was so focused on looking at your reaction while dancing so close with him.
the loud music made your chest tremble, your throat burned as you drank the alcohol from your cup. and you couldn’t tear your eyes away from hers.
you can see ekko leaning forward to talk to her, but she plainly ignores him. though her hips swayed harder against his crotch, he doesn’t lose time to grab her and follow her dance movements. a frown forms on your face at the same time she smirks, delighted with your reaction.
you try to think that it’s not a big deal, that they’re just dancing and having fun. ekko is not shy nor loyal, he would dance with you later in the night. but then he turns her around and kisses her like a hungry man.
jinx’s eyes don’t close like someone who enjoys a kiss would do. she keeps them open and fixed them straight into yours. she doesn't seem to care about all the people and music around her, she only focuses on you. she wants you to see every move they make, every kiss and every touch they have. it looks like she's trying to provoke you to be jealous, jealous of her and Ekko, and it's kinda working, very much so.
the intensity of her stare while she’s getting kissed so hard it’s making you melt. it’s making you wet. it’s messing with you in a way that doesn’t let you think straight.
the sign you used to do when you were friends had a lot of meanings, but right now it meant “meeting”. you make sure she sees it and quickly push through the crowd to make your way upstairs, where you know the bathroom is. thankfully empty, you get in and breath deeply.
a moment later, the door opened and there she was, jinx entering the bathroom, as you expected. she walks to you with a small smirk on her face, waiting for you to start talking. she’s still keeping her usual distance, even if it's just you two in here.
“are you having fun?” you speak with a scowl on your face, showing your disgust.
“i wouldn’t say having fun, but it’s not that bad. at least something’s going my way tonight.”
“of course it is,” you scoff, crossing your arms. “with that show you put over there.”
she just shrugs, like she doesn't really care, but there was a slight shift in her gaze as you talk. it takes her just a little longer before she responds to you.
"i’m just getting him to keep his attention on me instead of any other girl. i wouldn't exactly call that a show."
“are you sure? because the way you looked at me seemed way more interesting than ekko sucking on your tongue.” you thoughtfully say, stepping slightly closer.
"are you jealous?" her smirk growing bigger and bigger, her gaze had that same smugness to it that always happened when she knew she was making you angry. if she was right on thinking that you were jealous, she had won half the fight already.
“i am, actually.”
for some reason, it wasn’t a hard thing to admit. your admission does surprise her a bit. this isn't the reaction she was expecting from you at all, but she's not gonna complain.
"jealous?" she asks you, raising an eyebrow, as if that just sounded ridiculous coming from you.
“and wet.”
the grin that forms on her lips says it all. she takes a small step closer to you as well, “you're lying."
“wanna check?” you smile, leaning back on the sink to part your legs slightly. “it is your fault that i feel this way, jinx.” you purr, your hands now playing with the hem of your skirt. “what’re you gonna do about it…?”
she shrugged, nonchalant. “not my problem.” she firmly stated, though she still didn’t left, she just watched you with a glint of curiosity in those vibrant blue eyes.
you huffed, annoyed. with a light jump you sat on the sink counter and opened your legs, exposing your lingerie with a wet spot on your center. “will you watch from there?” you try again, tracing your inner thigh with a finger.
her eyes wander around, watching your movements and the way your fingers are moving along... she could almost feel the sensations by just looking and that made her slightly blush. the smirk on her lips becomes a bit bigger now, enjoying the show you're putting on for her.
a loud sigh left your mouth when you finally caress yourself, gently rubbing your clit over your underwear, the wet spot growing larger and larger. the small room quickly heated up, the intense gaze of your former best friend, and longtime rival, made you feel desired, hot.
“like the view?” you hummed, trying so hard to focus on keep the conversation going, but you just wanted to throw your head back and finger yourself to cum under her sight. “it’s only fair, hm- you made me watch how he touched you, how he kissed you…”
she's watching you in every single little detail, the way your fingers work in that sensitive spot and how it's making you breath a bit harder. and it was working on her as well. her breaths became heavier as well now, as she watched you, she could feel her body responding at the same time.
but you didn’t notice yet, so distracted with your own stimulation… you needed her to acknowledge you, to hear her voice, why wasn’t she saying anything? it was getting on your nerves, all of them. you didn’t know could you grow so hot and angry at the same time.
you felt more sensitive than usual, your face scrunching in pleasure you pleaded, “f-fuck, please.”
she doesn't reply to you, but she does seem to react though. she's fidgeting with her hands for a bit before she's back at the same smug, playful grin again. she walks closer to you, standing a bit next to your thigh now. she decided not letting you do it all your own.
the fingers of her right hand slowly approach you, a very soft, gentle movement which makes you feel all sorts of sensations at such slow pace. then they begin to slowly rub circles on your thigh and hip, your body instantly twitching towards her and you retreat your hands from your core, giggling.
“g-god, i don’t want to cum so quickly,” you softly pant, raising your wet fingers to lick them while looking into her eyes.
you finally got her, now she's the one that can't help but let out a soft moan... she can imagine how it feels for you and she can see the movement of your lips as you lick between your fingers with a subtle moan coming out of you. and you don’t lick them clean, encouraging her to taste you as you moved your hands slightly closer to her lips.
her cheeks instantly turns red as she realises where those fingers were heading to. she slowly and hesitantly brings them closer to her mouth, taking a small time before she starts to lick the fingers while maintaining the eye contact with you for a while at first, before looking away. your pussy throbbed at her newfound shy demeanor. her tongue left a very different sensation on your fingers.
you wanted more. without so much thought you just leaned forward, your tongue clashing against hers with your index and middle finger in the middle.
for the first time, you see her falter. just that one (something-like) kiss is enough to make her forget about everything else around her. she’s not even thinking about what happened in the main room anymore, all her attention is now on you and only you. her tongue slides around your fingers even more now, her lips becoming warmer as well, she's definitely more into this than you are at this moment.
jinx doesn't hesitate when you decide to take those fingers away and just goes for going directly for the kiss with you now. She wants to be the one to take control now, to take the lead after she had let you get so much under her skin until now.
her grip on your body is firmer, her lips pressing against yours more strongly now, her tongue gently trying to push inside your mouth, making you whimper against her. you hug her shoulders with one arm, your other hand nailing on her waist. you don’t fight for dominance, all you wanted was for her to take you.
it felt like an eternity, making out so heatedly in the bathroom of a party. you’ve never been kissed like this, not even by ekko. fuck ekko. it was all clear for you now, you needed jinx. you’ve been craving her since god knows how long. you didn’t have time to worry if she felt the same, not when her teeth bit on your lower lip to pull it harshly, earning a loud moan from you.
“ow,” you complained, not really bothered. “c’mon now, touch me already.”
your whines only increased her amusement. her grip on your thigh tightened as she kept that smug smile on her face, teasingly making her way in between your legs, which you rushed to part. you almost put your left leg up the counter, so ready for her fingers.
but she didn’t let you, chuckled before taking your lips in another kiss. this time less passionate, more-like a distraction. but there’s nothing in the world that could distract you from the feeling on her slender fingers slipping under your underwear, exploring your pussy and gathering all your fluids to circle on your clit.
pleasured sounds interrupted your kiss, both from you and jinx. though you didn’t want to stop, you wanted everything all together. while she was standing right next to you, it eased your way to grab her butt, lowering your hand from her waist, through her lower back, to the round flesh.
her fingers don't slow their pace at all, keeping a steady, firm rhythm on the sensitive spot. all her focus is on making you feel even better than before... her other hand continues to wander around your body, caressing and rubbing all over it, trying to feel every little inch of you, trying to make your sensations even stronger each time she touches you. she wanted to make you moan louder than the music rumbling outside, and if it was possible, you would have.
a long whine erupted from your tired throat, your voice almost as raspy as hers. “hmm, yes~” you moaned before biting on your lip so hard it drew blood, resting your forehead on her shoulder as your body convulsed in pleasure.
she had made you cum so good, so hard, you almost said i love you.
but you thought it, over and over as you catch your breath. how could you not notice before? what blinded you? oh, you felt so happy having mentally admitted how much you loved jinx.
a lazy and pathetically happy smile shined on your face as you pulled back to look at her.
her smirk… it had the familiar devilish tint, her eyes bright with mischief.
seeing your breathless reaction was enough for her right now, and she was obviously enjoying the feeling of having this much control over you at this moment. she reaches for your chin, raising it with two fingers. and there's that same, amused look in her eyes... like she's looking at you and thinking that this was her victory.
you were doomed.
#such a bad ending what the fuckk#i need her#jinx x reader#jinx#jinx arcane#arcane#jinx x fem!reader#jinx x reader smut#arcane jinx#lesbian#jinx fanfic#jinx x y/n#jinx x you#jinx smut#wlw#jinx lol#jinx arcane smut
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My thoughts have been preoccupied as of late worrying about https://www.tumblr.com/queenkatluv @queenkatluv ‘s whole situation. She’s the voice actor for Earth from The Sun and Moon Show / The Lunar and Earth Show, and has recently been relentlessly harassed and criticized by her so-called fans about the quality of her work to the point that she decided to quit working on the Lunar and Earth Show as a writer. I wanted to draw something special in honor of her, to kind of say sorry about how all the awful bullies have been treating her, since I haven’t done any art of Earth yet and the character is currently going through something that I personally relate deeply to.
Long story short, Earth has been hurt by Lunar in a way that’s left her in crippling pain that will likely linger with her for the rest of her life. I too have chronic pain in the form of daily migraines, and I have never related so closely to another character before. In fact, I have a headache as of writing this post, and I’m just so used to the pain I don’t notice unless I point it out to myself. The scene where she was talking with everyone else in bed about her condition - wondering what to do, wondering if it can be fixed, wondering what will happen if it will NEVER be fixed, feeling claustrophobic overwhelming dread as reality begins to sink in that the pain will never leave – it struck a chord because of how closely it reflected how I felt when I was diagnosed. It was just so scarily real to me, in a way that shows the true mark of an incredible writer.
I want to say to Kat, thank you so much for what you’ve done for this fandom. The people who don’t appreciate it just have standards too impossible to reach. You’ve done a beautiful job, and having Earth effected like this has evoked so many powerful emotions in me that I never thought possible. You’ve crafted a wonderful story, even if some stuck-up brats on the internet don’t see it ❤️
#tsams#tsams fanart#fnaf daycare attendant#sun and moon show#sams fanart#lunar and earth show earth#lunar and earth show#the lunar and earth show#tlaes earth#tlaes#laes earth#laes#queenkatluv#The sun and moon show#laes fanart#tlaes fanart#the lunar and earth show fanart#Lunar and earth show fanart#tsams art#laes art#tsams earth
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So, it turns out what I needed to get out of my writer's block was soul-wrenching grief and heart-crushing disappointment. And while I am happy about that (to an extent), I also wish my muse wasn't angst because I think I am hurting myself writing this fic and I need to now make it everyone else's problem.
Sitting there in the dark, on Eddie’s sofa, curled in on himself like it’s supposed to do anything to hold him together, one thought pops into his head, bright, neon red and in bold among the constant litany of boorish, black ‘This is all my fault’ — All of this is because I didn’t know what a Kinsey six is. The thought is unexpected enough that Buck unfurls a little, wondering where it came from and then he remembers their anniversary date. The memory leaves him breathless but he is curious enough to push past the newly burgeoning hurt and take out his phone. A quick Google reveals it to be the rating for ‘exclusively homosexual’ on the Kinsey scale so he looks that up next and as he’s debating whether to start from Wikipedia first or dive right into the Kinsey Institute website, his eyes land on the conspicuous ‘test online’ button right below the search bar. A part of him doesn’t want to find out, doesn’t want anyone else telling him what he is but the taunt is too much. If you had known, if you had just taken a moment to figure yourself out, maybe you could have said something. Maybe you could have stopped him before he walked away. He clicks on the first test that pops up, looks at the first question, goes to select option 1 and then stops and stares. ‘To whom are you attracted?’ should be an easy question to answer but the confidence to not think much has left him. He could easily choose ‘Both men and women’ but would that even be correct? He’s been so sure that he has felt attraction towards men a few times in the past but what if that was a mild interest at best? After all, no one had really pinged his radar the way Tommy had. He looks at the next question and that’s when the panic really starts to set in because he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know if he prefers men over women or if he just prefers Tommy over women, over everyone else. What if Tommy is the outlier and he prefers women over men after all? The pressure in his chest becomes more and more painful the longer he stares at it so he closes the test and opens the next one on the list. That one starts off mild. The way the first question is framed makes it easy to answer that yes, while he mostly notices women, the occasional man does turn his eyes. The next one asks what he would be comfortable in calling himself and he thinks he could get away with calling himself bisexual but then there’s an option saying ‘could be bisexual but not sure if that’s correct‘. And again the thought hits, What if it’s just Tommy? He debates it briefly and then gives in and chooses the latter option. He breezes through the next couple of questions because he is at least sure that he would find it desirable to kiss people from both genders but then they hit him with the sexual preference question again. He backs out so fast his phone nearly slips out of his hand and with a sigh of frustration, he clicks on the next test. That turns out worse because the very first question stalls him and so it continues again and again and again until tears start prickling at the corner of his eyes and his breath starts coming in sharp, short bursts pulling his throat tight but not taking any air to his lungs. He keeps at it until there’s one more nameless person behind one more useless test clamouring at him, Tell us, tell us, tell us. Tell us you know what you want. He hurls the phone across the room, thankful when instead of landing on the floor, it silently hits the backrest of Eddie’s armchair and slides down into the crease with a swoosh. He should get up and retrieve it, he should go home really but what he does instead is let his head fall forward onto his raised knees and give in to the caricatured voice of his mind telling him, Of course, he thought you would break his heart. Look at yourself, you idiot.
This is basically just the set-up for the fic but rest assured I am dragging Buck down to the trenches before I let him swim up to Tommy again.
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Fate
Pairings: Yoongi × y/n
Genre/tags: Arranged marriage
Warning: 🔞🔞🔞 mention of blood/violence/drugs/trafficing, trauma, mention of killing, kidnapping, gun, mention of food/eating/weight, cursing, sensual touching, making out smoking, smut (but not this chapter)
~~~~[lmk if i miss anything]
Words: 5.2k
Disclaimer:
- this story is just made up
- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊
Note:
Until you (mini series)
Part 1 - Prisoner
Part 2 - Escape
Part 3 - Twilight
Part 4 - Fate
A/N: again... im really sorry for being a slow writer/update for this mini series🙏🏻 i can't help it. 😭 I do get msgs asking for updates & i feel bad... so sorry 🥹 I try my best to have time to get into the story/characters whenever i have free time. I work full time and have a 2nd job too so it takes all my energy. I'm really... really sorry.😭
But yeaah, thank you for everyone liking my yoongi fanfic. 🖤🫶🏻 thank you for the patience😭
I hope this chapter is okay ♥️
****
(Prologue/Flashback)
"Sshh..." she covers your mouth for you to stay quiet and not make any noise. She reminds you constantly to keep it together or else they will find you. "Just a little bit more, Yoongi." She whispers. "Calm down..."
You try your best to do what she says because you want you guys to survive this. To escape. However you are a kid and you are terrified. And you can't stop yourself from shaking like a twig. Also you are rapidly breathing through your nose. Tears even start to fill your eyes as you look into her eyes.
"You'll be fine..." she says to you. "Noona, will protect you."
"I'm scared..." You whisper grabbing onto her long braided hair.
You two are a few inches apart. If she could only embrace you, she will. However there are metal bars between you two and she is.... injured.
"Me too." She wants to cry to as she must be as scared as you or maybe, more. But since she's the eldest between the two of you she have to be brave for you. "Just go to sleep... I promise... the moment you wake up...when the sun is shining after the storm tonight... we'll be safe... we'll already be at home..."
"P-promise?"
She tries her best to not break down because she knows that she's promising something that's very unrealistic in your situation right now. Both of you are held captives, kidnapped and waiting to be saved.
"I promise." She sniffs "Just hold onto this for now..." she meant her hair and then reaches her hand to you slowly even it's causing too much pain for her. "Go to sleep... Noona will be right here..." the tip of her fingers barely touched your cheek. "I will protect you..." she adds
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
[Present]
The silence between you two is very deafening. Even the staffs at the mansion notices how both of you are very distant to each other.
Odd right? They should be used to this situation since Yoongi is the silent type or the one who does not talk that much especially to you.
However for you, maybe this is out of character as every one is not used to you being like this. Well THIS silent anyway.
You usually talk and greet them or make small talks with them or Yoongi even if it's just a random question to make him just...talk. You do anything to make him speak to you. You make small efforts to chase his attention just to get him look back at you per say. Like a dog.
But now, since he made sure to leave you the moment you got vulnerable with him during sex and mentioned a feeling you have, which in the first place you had no idea you have, really hurt you this time. Big time. It is a rejection that you never thought would bother you this much.
"You two are awfully quiet." Mrs. Min says as soon as she puts down her cup of coffee on the table. "You two are both quiet originally... I know... but..." she looks at you and Yoongi back and forth twice. "Did you guys had a fight?"
No one answers.
"Guessing...silence means yes?" Mrs. Min looks at us again, hoping someone will speak up. "What did you do?" She asks Yoongi.
But he didn't open his mouth to speak. He just continued on chewing on his breakfast while his eyes are glued to you.
He has been eyeing you since the two of you left the mansion. He have been silently watching you move along, react and walk from your back. You don't notice it as you are trying to achieve to ignore him completely today. And so far, you are a gold medalist at it. You don't even bat an eye on him.
"Fine... not gonna ask anymore questions..." Mrs. Min gives up. "Anyways, after this lunch... I'll have a meeting with Hannah."
Yoongi flinches, finally reacting and gets interested to whatever his mother is saying. "What for?"
"About the private resort project that she is building... she wants my opinion about what brands to use for the decorations. She have a final lists of candidates of brands and she wants to know my say to it."
"Really...."
"Yes... and as soon as it opens... she says you two can go there... and celebrate... as her gift. Since she missed going to your wedding."
"Celebrate?" You finally spoke after how many years. Even Yoongi whip his head to look at you.
"Yes dear," Mrs. Min smiles so brightly and holds your hand. "You're 2nd anniversary... next month... right?"
"Ah, yes... right." You try to smile it away. But deep inside, you are not looking forward to it.
Why would you? Last year Yoongi didn't even greeted you Happy Anniversary. He probably didn't care back then so why would he care now and celebrate this year? This marriage is nothing to him.
"Is she coming here?" Yoongi asks his mother, changing back the subject to Hannah
"No... I am meeting her at her office."
You are holding on for dear life on your gold medal for 'Ignoring my husband award'. You are so curious to look at him. To see his beautiful face, how he reacts when they talk about her. Hannah. The girl you saw more than a year ago. The girl you saw on the driveway, talking to your husband while she hooked her arms on his'. The girl that Yoongi seems interested about. The girl he seems to.... like.
"How about you guys? What are your plans today after our brunch?" Mrs. Min asks
"Hmm.." he sighs heavily and then takes his phone from the table. "Probably fuck my wife " Yoongi answers nonchalantly making you and Mrs. Min almost choke on nothing. That sentence made you even look at him with wide eyes and red cheeks.
"Omo..." Mrs. Min is too stunned to even comprehend what she just heard. "Well... okay... too much information but..." she then takes a sip of her coffee. "You do you."
"I'm sorry..." you apologize to your mother-in-law.
You are embarassed. This topic should be a private matter. Everyone in the mansion already seem to have the idea what you two do on a regular basis but you do hope that outside, no one has to know.
It's not that you are embarassed of having a sex life. It's normal. Yes. But to have to talk about it to his parents, oh dear god, no.
"Why are you apologizing?" Yoongi's face looks so damn serious. "We are husband and wife right?"
You scowl at Him. You don't like how he acts or portrays like sex is just a hobby for him and it's nothing to be embarassed about. Especially in front of his mother while you are present. He really does not treat you like you have any feelings. He is evil.
"Okay... children...children... don't fight about this... it's okay. You already have issues before we got here so... it's fine." Mrs. Min tries to sooth the situation up.
She's so nice to try. Though she does not know the real reason why there is a huge distance between you two today. It's not that simple. You don't even know if she knows how his son treats you.
***
"Sir." Mr. Kim bows as both Yoongi and you arrives at the driveway, about to leave Mrs. Min's property.
"Get in." He orders you
You glare at him then roll your eyes away. You are in no mood now. You have scowled at him earlier already so why not do it more now that he is irritating you.
"Hold on..." he suddenly grabs you by the arm, stopping you from getting in the car. "Did you just fucking roll your eyes at me?" He scoffs
You try your best to pull your arms from his grip but he is stronger than you. "Let me go." You grunt
"What are you doing?" He asks, "You've been.... acting up lately..."
"I don't know...what you're talking about..." you finally freed yourself from his grip.
"Don't act innocent on me... I know you."
"Know me?" You snap. "How? We barely talked these past two years... You only look for me when you want something done and someone to fuck...besides that, I am nothing to you. So how the fuck will you know me?"
Finally! You've said something. However you can't lie to yourself how terrified you are right now. Your legs are shaking. You have never risen your voice like this before. Not with him. Plus Yoongi is so freaking silent. There was no reaction from him not like Mr. Kim who just coughed because of the sudden tension.
Is he in shock? He must be surprised to hear you speak out after all this time. He had never heard you talk like this before. You can't even read his expression. He is just looking down at you, straight on.
"Ahm... Sir... Miss... I'll leave you two... alone." Mr. Kim finally broke the awkward silence. "Just message me if... we're going home."
You glance at him and bow. Also giving an apologetic look since the situation got a bit serious.
And as soon as Mr. Kim is gone from our sight, Yoongi takes a step forward closer to you, making you back up and your behind bumping on the car. "Is that... what you think?"
You glare up at him. "Yes."
"You think... I don't know you?"
"Yes."
He chuckles. "I know you more than you know..."
You frown. "You only see me when you are horny... you don't even talk to me unless to I ask you... unless you tell me what to do and what not to do... so, how would you know anything about me...?"
He scrunches his face. He looks irritated "I see you more than you think." He mumbles. And then he took a step back and looks at you and watch you tremble,"Do you regret it?" He asks
"W-what? Regret what?"
"The sex... do you regret it?"
"W-what? What do you mean...?"
He then puts both his hands on the car, trapping you between. "Just answer the question... do you hate and regret the sex?"
You look away. "No...."
"Do you want us to stop fucking?"
You sigh heavily. "Why are you focusing on the sex?!?" Your brows are furrowed. You are really showing your frustration. "It's not about the sex, Yoongi! There is nothing wrong with the sex... what I just want is... I just..." you look back at his face and you see an empty expression from him. Does he not get what you are saying or is he ignoring the other parts of what you told him. That the only thing he thinks about is your sex life. "Never mind..." you lower your gaze. "It's not like my opinion matter..."
"Y/N..." Yoongi begins. You look back st him waiting for whatever he's about to say. You think he was about to response to you or maybe say what is on his mind as well. (Maybe.) However, both of you got suddenly distracted by the honk of a black sedan car entering the property.
You have seen that car before. It is familiar. And then when it stops and someone steps out of the car...
"Yoongi?" The woman that came out of the passenger seat, is Hannah. "What are you doing here?"
She is smiling ear to ear. Her smile is as bright as her tear drop pear earrings that is perfectly shown under her tucked bob hair. She's... so pretty.
"Oh... Hi..." she waves at you when she finally notices you
"Hi." You try to smile as brightly as you can.
"You must be Yoongi's beautiful wife." She is sweet. She looks like a friendly and easy going person. "I'm Hannah by the way... I'm Yoongi's friend since we're... toddlers..."
"Nice to meet you." You bow
"What are you doing here? Mother said..."
"Ah... yes... we we're supposed to meet at my office but I just came from another meeting and since we will pass by the house I decided to just meet her now..." she explains
"She must be in her room now.. preparing to meet you."
"Oh. I see... well, I guess I'll just surprise her." She grins. "Are you guys leaving?"
"Yeah... we just had brunch with her..."
Fuck. What is going on?
Just a second ago, you're having a serious confrontation with your husband. You guys are about to talk about the situation between you two. Yes, it may not be the ideal 'talk' but it is a start. But then, here you are. Hannah arrived and stole his full attention. Literally, she have all his eyes and ears. You suddenly became a shadow.
Then you are also hearing Yoongi converse. You are hearing how is he when he's not alone with you. You are hearing a side of him that you are not familiar with. 'Fuck Y/N, stop it.' You say yourself
Maybe, you just need to stop. Just stop complaining about his attention and him not liking you. Maybe he is not the problem. Maybe.. it's you? They forced him to marry and got stucked with you. YOU are the problem. You are NOT the person he wanted to marry. You just got selected just because.
You are the problem. As always. Like what everybody says to you.
"I'll just email you my thoughts after..." Hannah says
"Why not discuss it now?" Yoongi suggests
"Hmm...but you're about to leave..." she glances at you
"It's okay." Yoongi then pulls out his phone and messages someone. "I asked Mr. Kim to come... wait for him... I'll be quick." He says to you
You look at him for a second before you turn your back on him. "Sure." You sound lifeless. You sounded like you've given up already.
"Y-yoongi... you're going to make her wait?" She whispers to him but you care definitely hear it
"Let's make it quick. I don't want to work over the weekend."
He's more worried of working on the weekend but not making you stay and wait all alone.
They start to walk away. You could see their reflection through the windows of the car.
They left you alone.
He left you alone.
Then as you are standing there, waiting for Mr. Kim to come back, you slightly bend over your torso, holding onto the yourself as soon as you felt a little uncomfortable feeling on your lower abdomen. It's not painful but it is a bit of discomfort.
"Fuck..." you hiss under your breathe.
You should be careful now. Atleast until it's fully confirmed. Yes, you are pregnant. Well, that's what the PT told you a few days ago.
You took the test, in your bathroom, scared and shaking like a twig. You have never felt this terrified in your life. Ever. And the freaking 3mins of waiting felt like forever whilst you are in there, sitting on the floor.
But yeah, after the torture of waiting, the test did show two lines. It was a faint but it is positive. And during that moment, your world suddenly stopped spinning. You had to gather your thoughts and emotion within the span of 30mins that you have. (Because your maid will enter your bathroom to help you get ready after 30mins). That was one other toture you had to endure. And to add more spice on this never ending problem is that you were all ALONE. You had no one to hold hands or hug for moral support.
You are, all by yourself.
After testing, you did processed the result in your mind and managed to get back right to reality and decide by yourself to be... okay. To take it as another good day. Because this is not something bad. It is a miracle. It's a life.
Though, you can't lie. It was a whirlwind of emotion. And you don't know what to feel yet about it. You are not even sure if you are able to share it with anyone, even Yoongi since you still need to see a doctor to really confirm it.
Confirmation.
You fucking need that final 'yes you are pregnant'. Because your further decisions in life will revovle around that one thing. Decisions that might affect this marriage and basically affect your whole life. So, you really have to find a way to get a doctor's appointment in secret. For now...
"Miss?" Mr. Kim arrives and sees you slouching, "Is everything alright?"
You turn around, stands up straight and smile. "Yes..."
"Are you hurt?" He asks
"I'm fine... but I just think... my stomach feels heavy a bit from eating... I did ate quite a bit." You lie.
"Okay, let me bring you home quick so you could rest." He says
"Thank you."
****
[Yoongi's side]
Yoongi can't sleep. He got home earlier just an hour after Y/N got home. He asked the maids to call her, to have dinner with him, but unfortunately Y/N was already fast asleep.
He waited for her to wake up from what he thinks is just a quick nap. But whenever he asks the maid if she's up, they just shake their head and say sorry.
They fought. He thinks. It felt like they fought. It's his first time hearing her talk to him like that. She have been always timid and her patience with him is very long. However, she finally have had it.
How can you make your wife, who is clearly showing you that she's falling in love with you, start to hate you?
Well, Yoongi knows what he did and is doing to her. He is very controlling, cold and distant. And these are the traits that can't be part of your life especially of you are married. However, this is how he is. As a child no, but ever since the incident happen fifteen years ago, the trauma and the life he had to put through made him, This.
Outsiders might call him as the devil or the punisher of the Min Family because of all the work he is doing inside the office and outside. He is a fighter and his hands are always covered with blood. Though what he's doing is not a crime. The Min's business is not illegal. They control everything that they can do end everything that is illegal in the most legal way possible. If that makes sense.
They were just a business before. A typical rich family. But yeah, since what had happened to them years ago, they changed their rules and how they do it now.
And that's why Yoongi have this cold exterior. He needs to show to everyone who's watching him that he can't falter. That no one could try to even break him like how those monsters break his father. How those monster took them and made them hostages.
10 million. That's all it takes, for some uneducated humans do the most horrendous thing in this world. To hurt and kill an innocent child. A 16yrs old girl and a 14yr old boy.
Their parents were willing to give the money and even more, just for them to surrender their children. However, the fear in them when they know that the children saw their faces, made them decide to end it all.
Yuna, his older sister, sacrificed her life to save Yoongi. She is one brave young lady. She managed to push his brother just in time to fall on the edge, to roll down small hill and get away through the woods. She got shot and died on the spot. Yoongi saw everything but didn't had the time to grieve then and there because he had to survive yet. To run.
It took two more days before he was found. How he survived? No one knows. But since that day, the happy and cheerful little boy grew up and became the cold Yoongi everyone knows now.
He knows that what he have been through is not an excuse to treat his wife so coldy like this. She was only forced the marry him. She didn't even know him. Which is his fault as well because he didn't allow her to enter his bubble. Up to now...
However, through all the times that he have been with her little by little, as per his therapist's words, 'You are slowly breaking.' She said.
She said that before, whenever she asks him about his wife. He is usually nonchalant or indifferent. Like he's just talking about someone he randomly met. But then one day, the therapists said, she saw a glimpse of change in his eyes the moment she asks about his wife. His expression is the same but his eyes started to shift like he's thinking about it more before he speaks.
'You care. You just don't know how to show it' she said to him.
At first, When Yoongi heard that from his therapist, he got worried. Not because He is starting to have this feeling for his wife. No. His wife is never and will never be a bad thing that happened to his life. He is worried because, what if he breaks his cold exterious and somewhere out there in the world takes advantage of it and what happened years ago will happen again?
That is his only concern. That is why, he added more men. That's why Y/N can't leavr a house alone. That's why he always tracks her phone wherever she is. That's why he can't sleep without know if she is fine or not.
If only... he never had these issues, these traumas from the past, maybe... it's easier.
"Please... don't quit on me..." he says out loud as he closes his eyes, imagining the smiling face of his wife. "Don't... leave me..." he mutters
****
After what it seems like a very, very long day for you you're finally home. You are so tired that the first thing you did after getting changed is sleep. It feels like this is the longest you've slept in like forever.
You keep turning and waking up every now and then but your body kept forcing you to not wake up. It's like its telling you that you needed this. After all of the worrying you have been having these past few days. This sleep is for you.
But then maybe after hour five of sleeping, you felt something cold touch your skin. It didn't sting. It oddly felt good.
Slowly opening your eyes, you see a blurred figure in front of you. He's so close that you could actually smell his scent. The smell of baby powder.
"Yoongi?" You ask softly as your eyes slowly adjusted to the little light of your lamp shade. But no one answered back. You then rub your eyes to wake yourself up a bit more. Just to be surez you saw what you saw.
No one. There's no one there.
"Did I... just dream about him?" You ask, looking at the ceiling. "But I swear..." you trail off. "How funny... even in my dream... I see him..."
But you swear you smelled his scent. Your imagination of him is getting stronger. Your memory of him is getting move vivid. Even the smell now. That's how longing you are of him.
You miss him. Even though he is there you miss him. Oddly, you miss the time that both of you are just sitting down together in his home office and just reading. You miss casually asking him questions. You miss hearing him talk even though he's talking about his work and not to you. You miss him even though you just saw him earlier. Even though... he hurt you.
His scent. The scent you really, really like. His smell whenever you two have sex. It's not strong but it's there. Whenever you close your eyes and drift away from the high, you know you are okay as long as you could smell and hear him.
Fuck. Is this how being in love is?
Just thinking about him makes you want to cry. You are frustrated at him but at the same time frustrated to yourself as well. Why is communicating is so hard? You know that's the issue. Both of you are not good with talking nor expressing yourselves. Well, that's what Taehyun told you earlier.
Yeah, you went on a side trip earlier before going home, to meet your friend at his work. You needed someone to talk to and you know Taehyung is always there ready to listen to you.
You poured your heart out earlier, crying and all. You were sorry for disturbing him at work but you needed that cry and that hug. You had to told him your feelings about Yoongi. You have to say it out loud for you to truely understand the situation and yourself.
You needed someone's opinion to point out the obvious so it could stick in to your brain.
Growing up to a family where your opinion does not matter took a toll on you as well. Especially to an adoptive family. A family that only needed you for money.
To them, you always feel left out and does not deserve a voice. They always tell you that they only gave you a roof above your head and food to eat because you are what they needed. A piggy bank.
Your parents died in an accident years ago, when you are just 12yrs old. There was a police chase in the highway that rainy day. Every one is on high alert and giving way. But well, the criminals weren't exactly running away and trying to avoid cars. They hit quite a few vehicles during the chase and one of them was your parent's. The crash caused an explosion, killing them in an instant.
And like any drama stories on TV, yout aunt took you in because of your parent's insurance. They are not big but it is a decent amount. However, they could not actually touch it since it is saved for your education that's why the first month of you staying with them was torture. They beat you, make you work and starve you from time to time because they said, 'you don't deserve to eat unless you work for it'.
One reason why starving yourself was easy for you when you need to.
But then things changed a bit when someone knocked on the door one day and gave your adoptive parents a good amount of money. You remember the man saying 'this is for the trouble and lost we caused your family during our battle for saving our children.' You do remember you aunt, being a good actress that day, crying and all. You even saw them be in a good mood. Everyday because of that money. So since then, whenever you have a part time job or one good seasonal job, you save up and give it to them.
You do this not because you want them to be happy. You do this because you wanted peace for yourself. They will not hurt you if you give them what they need.
This is one reason too why you accepted this marriage. Even though, you know you will have trials too. But atleast you know, no one is going to hurt you physically anymore.
Though, you are having troubles now too.... it is still different. Like you said, it is the communication.
Is it all Yoongi's fault? No. Taehyung said that maybe, since I'm very submissive and him being very dominant, grew up giving orders or not listening to anyone because he is who he is, it affected the talking part in the relationship. Though he cannot say that it is a hundred percent fact. Because he explain, everyone have different stories of growing up and these affects every facet of their whole being when they get old.
Well, that's what you got from all his talk. Half of it, you are numb from all the crying and can't hear properly.
Though that talk with Taehyung,you needed that. Now all you have to do is talk to Yoongi.
If.... you have the courage too.
It is so hard to start a conversation not knowing how he feels about you. It is scary and a risk. But you are hoping it will turn out good especially now that you are expecting.
"Oh, right! The result!" You got up immediately and grab your phone.
You visited Taehyung in the hospital and he got to help you get a blood test to confirm. You forgot to talk to him about the result because you two are busy with doing friend therapy. He said, he'll just email you the result.
But then as you were scrolling scrolling through your emails your stomach growls. "I'm hungry..." you mumble and pause. "Taehyung said that if I am really pregnant... I need to eat properly now..."
And you haven't eaten dinner since you just slept since you came home. You need to eat.
Looking at the time it's pass 10pm already. Everyone must be asleep now or getting to bed so you must go and make yourself food yourself.
"Just one toast." You say as you push your blanket away. "Or two..."
You walk along the hallways as quietly as you can and then take the stairs instead of the elevator, going to the upper ground, so you could not disturb anyone.
There is still minimal light coming from the kitchen area. 'Maybe someone is still there?' You thought to yourself and hoping it is one of the maids so they could help you grab the things in the pantry. Since you don't really know how they organize it.
But then the second you turn to the corner, to enter the doorway
"Ah!" You hit your head first at something. Or at someone
Then after collecting yourself from bumping on someone, you look up to see who it was. "Sorry, I wasn't looking at--"
Fuck! It's not Yoongi nor anyone of the staff.
You tried to run back and scream but it was too late. He was quick to cover your mouth with a cloth. A scented cloth. The smell quickly pierced your nostrils and immediately made you feel dizzy and sleepy.
You are barely awake but you know he carried you over his shoulder. You could see the floor and the lights slowly to flicker. You are about to loose it.
'Help... Someone.... Yoongi... please...' You say to yourself before totally loosing consciousness.
-----
Taglist based on the replies last post 🖤
@gaby-93 @goodbyetwenty @baechugff
@amyz78 @qeen123 @armystay89 @bangtannie7 @daisies-and-dandelionpuffs @corruptedmistress @ot72025 @cheezwiz
@xkh0 @eli-deville
#yuyu1024#bts min yoongi#bts yoongi#min yoongi#yoongi fanfic#yoongi smut#yoongi x reader#yoongi angst#yoongi fluff#mafia yoongi#bts fanfiction#bts imagines#bts x fem!reader#bts x y/n#bts x reader#kpop fanfic#kpop au#mafia au
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Beef
Daryl Dixon x Reader
Requested : "Could you do a Daryl x reader where at first he doesn’t like her, and she tries to get to know why hes so mean to her? Maybe he yells at her and then some comfort after?" EDIT: I saw this same request being written by another writer and I want to say, don't send multiple writers the same exact request. I find this super disrespectful.
This one took some turns of its own while writing, I hope it's to your liking!!
When his group first came to the community you were excited. Finally you'd have a real huntsman around to share experiences with, you had missed it so bad.
Before the fall your family owned a shop, your father a butcher and your mother a taxidermist. You and your siblings learned every skill from hunting to skinning, prepping and using each part of the animal so none would go to waste. You hadn't hunted in so long, you weren't sure if you still could hunt succesfully. Even now you'd donate large, strong antlers and bones to the blacksmith in Hilltop to use in weaponmaking. You donated the furs you didn't fashion into items yourself to the seamstresses and prepped each type of meat for meals.
But somehow the new hunter didn't take the shared interests as something positive.
He brought you animals, yes. But never without throwing a judgy look around your workplace. Even when he came in with someone else who'd compliment your clean work he'd only scoff, dump his kills and head back out.
"Sheesh, what crawled up his ass?" The large moustached man laughed. You only shrugged as you lugged the deer behind your counter. "Hell if I know. Ain't digging it out tho. He seems to be doing okay with everyone except for me.." You returned the laugh while the man who's name slipped your mind helped you put the deer on your workbench, only to quickly drop the fake smile and leaning against your workbench.
You thanked him with a sigh and he gave you that look that told you to spill your thoughts.
"Fine. It sucks he's so weird. It'd be awesome to have a partner to do all of this with and to go hunt with." You busied yourself sharpening yuour knives, clearly still annoyed by the whole ordeal. "And..?" The long winded drawl made you roll your eyes at the man's persistance.
"And he's drop dead gorgeous, okay? There. I said it. I have a crush on the man. Happy no-- Ah fuck!" Your knife hit the floor with a clatter as you grabbed at your bleeding hand.
"Alright, up and out withya. To the doc we go." You were led to the infirmary and passed the source of your annoyance on the way.
Not that you were listening, but you still caught his voice in passing. "Damn folk 'ere don't know how ta do shit." You caught his glance in your direction and if you weren't busy keeping yourself from bleeding out you'd confront him.
It was a clear message that you weren't allowed to use the injured hand for your work and risk pulling the stitches, and honestly it just hurt too much to do anything with it. It sucked even more than having to leave your old home behind. There were people counting on your work so they'd have food.
It didn't stop you from going to work and doing as much as you could one-handed. You got there extra early to make up for the extra rime everything would take now, and by the time you'd normally open you found Deanna on your steps, greeting you with her usual smile. "I knew you'd be here stil working, but I brought someone to help until your hand is better. You shouldn't be overworking yourself."
As quick as she had entered she had left again as well, leaving you with your new work companion.
The hunter.
"Good morning." You gave him the kindest smile you could, but were only given a grunt in return as he tossed a bundle of tied up small game on your desk, rounded the corner and fished for a knife to start taking them apart.
Besides you explaining where to put all the different parts of the animal you two barely spoke, until the snap of bone pulled you away from your focused work of skinning yesterday's deer. "The hell?" You turned around to go see what he was up to.
"What are you breaking bones for?" His station was a mess, he pointed at the difficult point he was cuting along. "Easier ta reach without the bone in the way." Without even looking he continued. "Ya should know tha'. Damn city girl doin' mah work."
Again with his snarky comments. You shrugged it off and went back to your own station. Yiur bkood bloiled but you weren't gonna let him get to you, you had work to get done. "Try not to do that, we can still use the bones if you keep them whole."
You tried so hard to focus on your work, skinning the deer with only one functional hand was so difficult and even though you were having extremely conflicted feelings about it you still had to ask him for help.
"Can I borrow your hands for a minute? Can't do this on my own."
You held the large deer up and moved it as Daryl cut away the skin in the most choppy manner, creating a clear line where you stopped and he started. "Can you please work a bit mote delicate? That's gonna take me ages to clean up." You huffed from keeping the deer in place, but also annoyance. Why didn't he work like a hunter? He must know the code, right?
"Why're ya so on mah ass 'bout how I work? Gon' toss it out anyways. Just need the meat, tha's it." He got snappy at the end and you just stared at him, anger clear in your eyes. "Seriously?"
You let go of the deer and stepped away from the counter. "You're sent to MY shop. To help me because I happen to fuck up my hand for the first time ever since I got here years ago and all you can do is talk shit about me?" The knife that laid on the desk before now in your good hand and pointed at his chest. "God I can't believe I even fell for your hunting woodsman charms. You're just an asshole who doesn't give a shit about these animals or the hunter's code." With a clatter the knife hit the floor as you tossed it to the side with shaking hands.
"Get the fuck out of my shop and go find me someone who cares." With angry steps you turned around and headed out of the room, needing a break to gather yourself first if you wanted to get anything else done.
Now alone in the workstation, Daryl snatched up his catch from this morning and headed out.
~~
"You did what? Pookie you gotta listen to the girl." Carol sat down next to him and snatched the cigarette from his fingers. "You know you disrespected her life's work by now following her rules in her own shop, right?"
"I'on get why tha's even important anymore. We gotta eat, tha's all." Daryl's annoyed grumbles did nothing good it seemed as Carol continued to scold him like he was a child. "Did you for one second maybe think this work is all she has left to hold onto her old world self?"
"Cept this ain't the old world no more. She's waistin' time doin' all tha extra shit."
Carol was up and at the front door by now, putting out the cigarette in one of many ashtrays there. "Alright, up with you. You're apologizing with me right now."
The two took off to your shop but found no one there. Daryl's half finished rabbit still out in the open on the table while the deer was gone. "Ain't here. I'll head back tomorro--"
"No we're not. I know where she lives, come on." Carol practically pulled him along on the way to your place despite Daryl's protests.
You were working in your basement area when you heard a knock on the front door. "Come in!" Everyone who came to your place knew the door was unlocked and was free to come and find you, seeing you were either cooking, working on lounging when you kept the front door open.
"Hey, it's Carol! Heard about your hand, need some help around the house?" She needed an excuse to get an answer and find out where you were, so when you called back she knew to head downstairs.
Meanwhile Daryl just stared around to keep his mind busy. He found rabbit skins from prey he brought in wrapped around a pair of boots. He recognized the fur seeing it was a rare color. Further into your livingroom there was a deer pelt draped over the back of your couch. Also caught by him. The white spots over the back had one small flaw from where his bolt had struck right on a white dot. He remembered being proud of his aim for a minute that day.
"Daryl, come on." Carol's whisper-yell had him roll his eyes and as he passed your coatrack he noticed the hooks were all antler parts and the knives laying in the basket on the hallway table had bone handles.
So that's why you were so angry when he snapped the rabbit's leg and skinned the deer so carelessly. You did really use everything.
The two walked down the stairs to your workshop, Carol up front with Daryl following.
"Oh wow," Carol's exclaimation had you laugh. "Yeah, I get that a lot." You stood with your back turned, struggling to hang a piece of skin.
"Here, lemme help ya." Daryl's gruff voice was suddenly right behind you and you spooked, letting go of the pelt but Daryl caught it just in time, draping it over the wire. "Like tha?" His hands stayed up there and adjusted it to your liking, having stepped back to watch him and give Carol a questioning look. She just shrugged and gestured at the man who was again staring around the room. "What brings you here?"
Daryl looked at everything except you, he knew he'd lose all ability to speak if he did. Hell, he already had a difficulty getting his words out now seeing how wrong he was for not listening to you. "Came ta say sorry." He stared at the basket of furs labeled 'Donate'. "Shoulda known better than ta get angry. 'N I get why ya work thr way ya do now." Next to the basket sat a crate filled with thick, sturdy bones labeled 'blacksmith'.
You nodded and gave him an option. "Come back to the shop tomorrow. I'll have tou clean up that deer skin you almost ruined and you're following my teachings. I'll forgive you for wasting the rabbit."
Daryl chewed at his thumb, the other hand stuffed in his pocket and fidgeting with the fabric inside. "Yeah, alright." He nodded and looked over at Carol who had the brightest smile on her face. One that screamed victory.
"We'll get out of your hair, I'll bring by some lunch tomorrow at your shop." Carol waved on her way up, and just as Daryl was about to follow her you quickly spun around to grab something. "Oh, here." You held out a thin knife wrapped in leather, a small engraving of Hilltop's blacksmith on the handle. "I saw you took the rabbits, so if you haven't prepped them yet you can try this one. They're great for smaller animals."
He stumbled over his thanks as he accepted the knife and quickly headed out after Carol.
~~
You were back at work early the next morning, painkillers and a small breakfast in your system already and hoping to finish that damn deer. It still proved a challenge to get it from the cooler onto the workbench but you managed eventually, just before Daryl came in.
"Mornin'." Hid gruff voice sounded through the workplace as he rounded the corner and placed the knife from yesterday on the table. "Thanks fer lettin' me borrow it. Worked like a charm."
You picked up the knife and held it out to him again, only to recieve a questioning grunt in return. "It was a gift. To keep."
Daryl never got gifts. Everything he had was scavenged and well taken care of for longer use these days. It felt weird to keep it but he thanked you again and pocketed it.
Meanwhile you had grabbed the deer skin and laid it out where he'd be working. "Look here, I'll show you how to clean this up and you'll go fix the rest, okay? It'll take a while but it'll be worth it." Daryl stepped up to you and observed the way you took the knife to the uneven spots of skin and carefully smoothed it all out. The precision in your work was impressive to say the least. "How long've ya been doin' this?"
You dropped a cut off piece of meat into a plastic container and thought back to the old world. "I guess ever since my parents thought I was old enough to handle knives." You held the tool out to the hunter and watched him take it from you. "Your turn. I'll be hopefully finishing that deer so just ask whatever, whenever."
You were lucky a lot of the cutting could be done onehanded, and holding back pieces was okay enough to do with your wrist or hold something down with your elbow. But now that you had all the easy access meats off and seperated you ran into a problem.
"Fuck.." You needed help. The same kind of help that had you kick him out yesterday.
"Sup? Need hands?" He was at your side in a second, waiting for your instructions.
"I need to take off the ribs but I can't." You leaned aside to point around the carcass. "If you can press down here, and there." Daryl followed your instructions and put pressure on the spots you pointed out. "Then I can take this here apart." Your movements were followed and suddenly it was way too hot in your always cold workplace. Yesterday you'd be happy if he decided thr Kingdom was a better home for him but now that he apologized and proved to better himself after your misunderstanding you were back to being the lovesick puppy Abraham had made you out to be when he brought you home after the infirmary visit.
With how Daryl held the spot clear and open you had to get close to chop through the bone and separate it all in workable bits.
"Can I take one a'those later? Michonne asked ta cook fer her kids cuz she's out 'n Carol's off ta Kingdom--" "Throw the kids an old world barbeque! I'll come help. I'm sure you're skilled in roasting over an open fire with how much you traveled." The excitement was clear in your voice, and the sudden compliments and offers of gifts and assistance had him nervously fidgeting. But thinking about having a fun experience with the kids instead of just cooking and having dinner sounded way better than his original plan, so he agreed.
"Ya got supplies ta fix tha' in half a day?"
~~
The two of you cleaned up after finishing thr needed work and while you carried the prepped meats, Daryl had the bowl firepit on a kart together with the metal rack to hang over it. Yeah, he lived in a community now but he never guessed he'd be carrying around a whole barbeque setup like he was getting ready to throw a party in the old world. "Gotta drop by tha' house fer a sec, get Jude 'n RJ."
After he got the kids and you had everything set up Daryl got the fire started while you made a quick pantry run and dug through Daryl's kitchen for anything to add to the meals.
You brought whatever you found and set it on the side of the porch steps, keeping a path to the house cleared and sat yourself down in the front lawn as you watched uncle Daryl in action, letting the kids toss wood onto the fire and poke at it with a stick but making sure they kept their distance and wouldn't touch the hot metal.
It was heartwarming to see him laugh and have fun with them and watched him speak quetly to the kids with a finger pointed your way before the two came running towards you.
"Daryl says the fire's good for food! Can we put some on the thing?" Two pairs of big, begging eyes stared at you and saying no would be the worst so of course you allowed them, under surveillance and with an assisting hand. "Alright, pick something you wanna eat first and put it on a plate, Daryl will take it to the fire and I'l helf you put it on the rack, okay?"
A chime of "Okay!" baely left them before they were at the collection of prepared meats where you and Daryl joined them in picking.
While Daryl roasted the food over the fire you were tasked go keep the kids busy, but wirh hoe much they loved chatting about everything and anything it was an easy task.
The whole evening was fun and food and family and it reminded you of everything you missed in this new world.
Everything was good in this moment, especially when you heard a little exchange between uncle and niece.
"Uncle Daryl? Can we have more dinners with her? But also mom and aunt Carol next time." You watched Daryl look towards you for a moment before turning back to Judith. "'Course, she's teachin' me ta prepare food so we can do this with e'ryone if ya want. But!" He raised his hand and pointed at RJ, who came over to him too now. "Yer gonna be the ones askin' folk ta bring food too, so e'ryone has somethin' ta eat, 'kay?"
The two happily nodding kids proved that your time in the community just got a lot more fun.
Now, after the kids were long brought to bed you and Daryl stayed around the fire. Having taken the meat rack off and set asidr you were just relaxing and picking away at the leftovers.
"So," you started, watching the flames in front of you. "That community barbeque plan of yours, it sounded amazing especially how you brought it over to the kids. But, aren't you afraid it'll drain recources too quick?"
Daryl shrugged it off. "Maybe. But those kids'll make folks keep stuff aside fer it." The idea of those two running around the place collecting people brought a smile to his face. "'Sides, I ain't wastin' meat no more with yer lessons tha' I hope ya will keep givin' me."
Oh. He wanted to stay? At the shop? With you? You were pleasantly shocked with that news. "What? Ofcourse I'll teach you. But only of you promise to take me out hunting when my hand's okay again."
He let out a breathy laugh and nodded. "Yeah, I'd love ta have ya around."
You stretched and laid down in the grass, looking up at the night sky.
"S'gonna be fun."
#sometimes i write#daryl dixon#daryl dixon x reader#daryl dixon imagine#daryl dixon fanfiction#twd daryl#twd#the walking dead#twd x reader#daryl x reader
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hello! I really love your work and I was thinking if you could write a one-shot of theo inspired by the song " Open Arms by SZA ". but somehow make it a good ending? idk 😓 ( like a slow burn or something ) reader had to let theo go but theo is kind of begging..? for reader to stay in his life and so on! idk if I explained it good enough but you can search up the song and take a look at the lyrics, you'll see what topic I'm going for!
thank you if your write this! you're an amazingg writer ‼️
never leaving
pairing: theo nott x reader
content: your insecurities push you to break your friendship with Theo, only to realize you were wrong all along.
a/n: hope this matches your expectations, I'm sorry if it didn't<33 (also I feel like I'm apologizing in every a/n)
You could say that Theo took you in, he was the only person in your life that ever made you feel too comfortable. When you were on the train, he had befriended you and he never let his friendship falter.
Theo was everything, he was all you could ever need and it scared you how much you were dependent on him. You had never needed anyone, always doing everything by yourself but you could see that changing.
Friends weren't a usual sight in your life and Theo had changed that, but you still had your doubts and maybe that's why you had decided to tell him.
You always had a lingering feeling, that he was taking pity on you because who would willingly spend so much time with you, call themselves your best friend, he had no reason to do it.
You spotted Theo in the hallway along with Mattheo and Enzo. The former two were smoking, and Theo's eyes met yours, and he immediately threw down his cigarette, crushing it using the sole of his shoe.
His eyes stayed on you while yours diverted here and there, ashamed to even meet his gaze. You wanted to be with him, but he was ruining his life for you, he was way too enamored and you wanted to help him.
You reached the group and scrunched your nose at the nicotine smell, Theo noticed this and dragged you away. Why does he have to be sweet and make this harder? you thought.
"Theo, I-" You questioned yourself, he was the only person who knew you but it would be too selfish to make him stay, so you continued, "I don't think we should be friends anymore"
Maybe friends wasn't the right word to describe you two, you weren't dating but he never dated anyone else and it's not like you could. You always hoped it was because he harbored some feelings for you but that had been a foolish fantasy.
"Y/n, I'm sorry sweetheart, I won't ever smoke again, I mean this was the first time in weeks, I really am trying" what? he thought this was about him smoking?
"No, Theo it's not about that." you simply stated trying to make him understand about you suddenly pulling away. He stared at you, his mouth opening and closing as if he wanted to say something but really could find the words.
"You can't do this, you cannot wake up on a random day and decide to remove me from your life as if I'm a pawn in your chess board" he was almost yelling, Theo had never yelled at you nor had he ever gotten angry at you, it was always you being mad and him picking up on it.
You remembered a scenario from second year and how different times had gotten now, you had changed and him not so much but you guess it was for his better.
"Where's y/n?" The twelve year old Theodore Nott asked his friend and said friend just shrugged in response before saying, "She hasn't been talking to anyone."
You're mad, he knew you were you always shut everyone out when you were, falling silent and Theo knew just how to better your mood and so he headed in your direction.
Your flashback stopped when you saw a tear fall from his eyes, you had never seen Theo cry either, only once and that too not intentionally. He was showing every emotion of his and you stood there unable to think, mumbling a sorry before leaving him stranded in that hallway.
Theo was shocked, hurt, angry and was feeling all these emotions at once. He had known you for six years and you had left him in six minutes. He loved you and you couldn't see it.
He knocked on your door for the fifteenth time, and you finally opened it. Your eyes were red and puffed up, you were crying.
"Why are you doing this?" He asked in a small voice unlike the one he used in the hallway, he was scared to lose you.
"You don't need to take anymore pity on me, Theo, go live your life" you said with a sniffle in the end and your statement had only made him more confused.
Pity? he had never taken pity on you, and it hurt himself that you believed that nonsense. "You can't replace me y/n, I'm forever, no matter what."
You so wanted to believe him, you so wanted to be in his arms right now, you so wanted him to stop as he was doing right now but you just couldn't.
"I'm sorry Theo, but I have to" Those were last words to him before you shut the door and Theo couldn't sleep that night.
It had been 2 months, 18 days of you ignoring him and he thought he might go mad, you were driving him crazy, you not being there was so much worse than he had anticipated.
It was late in the night when he spotted you leaning against a railing, breathing hard, and when he got a bit closer he noticed you were crying.
He went to stand beside you, you flinched but then sort of relaxed when you noticed who it was. You laid your head in your hands and started crying even harder and without missing a beat or saying something spiteful, Theo took you in his arms.
It was much later that you realized that you could not live without him, he was your Theo. Your tears wet his shirt but he didn't seem to mind, he never seemed to mind.
"You won't leave again, would you?" He asked as if he knew you were coming back and he was right. "You could try, but this time I won't let you."
You smiled at him, god he was the only person in the world who would never make you feel bad about what you did, and you realise it was only your insecurities holding you back from him.
He kissed your forehead lovingly and hugged you even tighter, "I love you" he whispered, half hoping you didn't hear him, but you did.
#harry potter#slytherin#draco malfoy#theo nott#enzo berkshire#theo nott fic#theo nott x reader#theo nott x y/n#theo nott x you#theodore nott#theo nott imagine#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott fic#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott scenarios#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x you#theo nott one shot
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I was seeing posts of one of my favorite ships (It was Swanqueen btw) and I almost started crying when I saw a gif of them and other LGBT ships from different shows because why can't we win, not even once?
Like seriously- they always make canon straight ships even if they have zero chemistry or development, and every time there's an LGBT ship with good chemistry and good development the writers go like "Haha no they're not lovers, they're just friends/family/rivals/enemies lol" or they kill one of them not to make it canon. And it's so freaking unfair. And it hurts. It freaking hurts. It's always the same story: there's two women/two men who share a lot of scenes together, looking at each other with heart-eyes, showing how deeply they care about each other, and the writers decide to pair one of those characters with another character of the opposite gender because then the ship would be straight and not LGBT.
And It hurts so much seeing the writers not making a ship canon just because it's LGBT. And for what? For who? For homophobic people? For queerphobic people who don't know nothing better? For queerphobic people who are the worst for not accepting someone dating a person of the same gender? They seriously make canon straight ships just for them? For that kind of people?
The LGBT colective are humans too. The LGBT colective are people. They're not machines. We are not machines without emotions. We are not inhumans. We deserve to be loved as much as a straight person deserves to be loved. We deserve to be represented in the media as much as a straight person does. And we deserve to be treated as people. As equals. As human beings. We don't deserve to be treated as freaks. We don't deserve to be treated as ill people. We don't deserve to be treated as some kind of monster. For the love of God, we are humans like you. Like everyone else. Loving someone of the same gender doesn't change that. Not wanting to love/not wanting to have sex with someone doesn't change that. And being trans or non-binary doesn't change that neither.
We don't deserve to be afraid of telling our parents we are LGBT. We don't deserve to go to conversion therapy because we're "ill". We don't deserve to cry because the world doesn't accept us. We don't deserve to be treated as criminals for being LGBT. We don't deserve to beg for representation in media. (Most of these things didn't happen to me -and I have to thank God for that- but I know it happened to people in other countries, so I wanted to say it)
And if you (the writer of those shows with queerbating) are okay with people suffering because you don't show the world LGBT people are normal people too (and not freaks), then I think you're not better than the queerphobic people. As someone said, "If you are in a class with a bully and you do nothing, you're not better than the bully". And if you live in a world with queerphobic people, and you do nothing to make them a minority, then you're not better than them. And no, don't come crying at us. "But I-" No, don't make excuses. If you don't make an LGBT ship canon because "the world will judge you for it" then you're not really an ally. So don't you dare try to act like one.
ND Stevenson is a real ally. Dana Terrace is a real ally. You know why? Because they didn't make a straight ship canon just because it was straight. They made a LGBT canon because they had chemistry. And we saw the chemistry in that canon LGBT couple. So unless you're like them and you make an LGBT ship canon, you're not an ally like they are. (And yes, the LGBT canon ship of their shows are good representation, so don't come at me saying it's bad representation. Just say you don't like lgbt couples and leave it there)
#queerbaiting#lgbt#bisexual#trans#lesbian#gay#nonbinary#aromantic#ace#johnlock#lawrusso#samtory#icemav#hangster#destiel#merthur#thiam#cherik#swanqueen#coldflash#olivarry#steddie#spirk#gigolas#thilbo#klance#zukka#tomco#lukadrien#kagaminette
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Hoooooly crap I am BLASTED rn. Can I ask for poly 141 (it can be werewolf if you want) react and be with a reader tgat gets all giggly and snuggly while high. Also i love your work so mich like genuinely i just binge ypur stuff and constantly read things over and over and over again. Youre such a talented writer and honestly we should paying you for us to read your work. I hope you’re doib well, i love ya a toooon
— Yandere TF-141 with a gn darling who gets giggly and snuggly whilst high
Warnings: yandere behavior, being high, and being taken advantage of.
A/N: there’s no need to pay me, i’m happy to share my writing with you + everyone who likes my writing; thank you for the sweet compliments. This isn’t werewolf AU, but enjoy <3!!
To start off, they don’t mind pot. They know the real story, and how the government hides it. This said, they don’t necessarily have an opinion on it — it’s weed, nothing wrong or right about it.
However, they also don’t condone it, as they like you awake. But if you do it, you do it and hey, they get to see a side of you that nobody else does, and you quickly become a doofus.
To say they love your giggly and cuddly side is an understatement. All of them chuckle when they come home, seeing you laid down on the couch with reddened eyes. They love to plop you on their lap, laugh at your weird and not-in-the-moment-thinking conversations and ask you dumb shit, just to see your reactions.
Soap can be a little shit, especially when you do a joint. He likes to ask deep-conversational questions, loving how your nose crinkles when thinking of it. And when you stutter, he loves to lean in and say: “Hm? Didn’t catch ‘at, sweetheart.”
To be honest, they all love to take advantage of you. Seeing you all calm and welcoming makes their dark heart darker than ever.
Simon likes to ask you questions with promises, such as marriage, or even kids. Watching your reaction, and smiling with soft touches. And when the next day comes, asking if you remember them, and if you don’t? He’s hurt. Those promises were real, weren’t they?
Honestly, Kyle and Price are worriers. Even though they know the side effects are normal, they worry like hens; constantly checking your head with the back of their hand or making you drink water to stay hydrated, as if you’re sick.
As for Johnny, he’s in the middle — but still a little shit. He laughs when you laugh, even at the horrible jokes, and tries to make you stay in the ‘high state’ because it’s cute.
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You Kill Me (Pt 2.)
Caius Volturi x vamp female reader
Summary: The confrontation after part one. Warnings: Angst, foul language, mentions of sexual harassment, Caius' sinister side peeks (I think thats all?) A/N: FINALLY! Man it took a while but I mean I got writer's block with this one. I really wanted to dive a bit deep with this and I added a couple back and forth POV between reader and Caius (I almost added a Marcus POV but I changed my mind). Thank you to everyone who has been patient with this one-shot, I hope I did not disappoint. But as always...Enjoy💙 Word Count: 6k+ (My longest one so far)
(Here's Part 1)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(This. Was. His. Era. Again Jamie did him justice🥰)
Recap….
We stood in silence, I wanted to say something but I didn't know what exactly. I must have been too deep in thought because when I looked up he was gone…..
Oh gosh. What have I done? Why didn't I just say something to him, anything really could have worked at that moment and maybe I would not of hurted him. I never wanted to hurt him in anyway, he’s my mate for fucks sake. Even if I'm still getting used to the idea of having him as my mate, or just being around vampire civilization again, I would never want to harm him. When I pushed him away the hurt his eyes reflected, hit me.
Why am I being so difficult with him? You would think finding your mate just clicks for one and everything in your life finally makes sense, you get a sense of being even but no I decided to just make this once in lifetime experience so complicated. I have been in communication with Carlisle of course via letters, and when I tell him about me and Caius, I can already picture him shaking his head in disappointment each time he reads my letters. He understands why I'm being like this but he finds it totallyunnecessary for me to act like this toward my own mate, he keeps telling me you only get one in this lifetime.
I decided to head outside to the gardens, where I usually spend my alone time until I see Marcus there. It seems he was expecting me.
“Hello Marcus, fancy seeing you here”
“I would say the same thing but we have matters to discuss, dear”
I guess Caius got to him already, even if Marcus never shows any sort of emotions, right now he's giving me the same look Carlisle would give me when I did something absurd. He motions for me to sit with him, which I join him instantly.
“I am already going to assume you know what I'm about to say?”
“I have a hunch of an idea”
I couldn't look at him because the look he's giving me was pure disappointment, I felt like a child being scolded by their parents. I know that feeling all too familiar, I was the ‘wild card' apparently compared to my brother when we were younger, father had a knack to always scold me even when it's something as little as forgetting to put away a cup. Carlisle had it easier compared to me, I was molded to be this lady that society would approve of, I was designed to be the perfect wife according to my father. Mother would have never wanted me to be raised like this, she was the one who encouraged me to read, she was even the one who taught me how until she passed away when me and Carlisle were 5.
“Let’s start this off simple, how are you feeling?”
That is a very good question, how the fuck do I feel? Sure I feel confused, that's all I have been feeling since I found out about being mated to Caius but I mean I feel disgusted. I feel disgusted with myself, I heard stories over the years that the Volturi were supposedly these power hungry coven who are just ruthless but now I feel like I'm the true villain here. What kind of sick person– err vampire in this case– turns their back on someone who has been nothing but loving and patient with them? Caius, even if he has been interesting with his tactics of showing affection, has only been patient with me, and how do I return the favor? I push him away and basically stomp on his heart.
“Terrible”
“Elaborate on that”
I really do feel like a kid currently.
“I feel terrible because I broke Caius heart”
“And how?”
And now I feel like I'm in a therapy session.
“For months I turn away from our mate bond and refuse to give in, he does not deserve that, actually screw that he does not deserve a mate who just shuts him away for no reason”
“Oh but there is a reason to your uncalled behavior”
“Isn't there always a reason for everything?”
“Yes, which is why I'm asking you why are you being like this?”
“I dont know”
Of course I know why, I'm scared to give into the bond, what if I’m not good enough for him. What if I fuck up or something and he decides I'm not worth, that I'm not worthy in being his mate. I know you can't pick who your mate is or anything but he could do so much better than me, a person worthy enough to be his queen. Other than the fear, I'm angry. I've been forced to be here forever and don't even have the chance to see my brother. I miss him, he was all I had left of my family and now I have to be away from him. And my past trauma is always lingering.
“I doubt that”
“Marcus, no disrespect to you, but why are you invested in me and Caius? I know he's your brother and all but…why?”
I saw him look off to the distance, almost like I do on a daily basis when I'm reflecting on thoughts or events throughout the day. But I could see his expression change, instead of the disappointed look he had not that long ago, he looked gloomy which was his usual expression before I started to talk to him.
“I told you about my…” I saw him take an unnecessary gulp ”late wife…Didyme,right?”
“Yes you did, she sounded like a lovely being, I would of loved to of meet her”
“She was, I mean she is. What i'm trying to say is I don't want to you or Caius to end up like me, I have had my brother in my life for so long and to see him finally find his mate, makes me surprisingly happy, I might not show it but internally I have a bit of peace”
Oh the guilt I have right now is no joke, the way he is speaking makes me worry more about the situation I created with his soul brother. The day he told me about Didyme was when I healed her favorite flower, he only told me a bit about her, her personality, features, how her smile could brighten any room, how with just a touch his worries and sadness would be like if it never existed. He truly loved her and the way he is barely going through life does make me sympathize for him big time. I actually make sure to check up on him at least once a day, from just asking him about the latest book he has read to just asking him to oversee my work in the garden, it's not much but I can see a bit of change in his eyes.
“But I also do not want to see you suffer, I don't know what you are trying to accomplish with this behavior but you have become an important person to me. I view you as a sister I never had, makes me a bit envious of Carlisle since he has the honor to call you his actual sister.”
“Marcus I don't know what to say, I'll be honest with you but I view you as my brother as well, I see a bit of Carlisle in you”
“We are getting off topic but I appreciate your honesty dear, the point of this conversation is to come to your senses and accept Caius as your mate, I can see your bond with him weaken, you are doing nothing to nurture it, he was kind of trying but not in an effective way, in a way you two are acting like children, now if you will excuse me, I have matters to attend to”
He took off before I could even close my mouth at his revelation. He does make a point, I need to stop this ridiculous behavior I've been having and be willing to accept Caius as a mate.
Caius POV
Humiliated. Disappointed. Defeated. Embarrassed. Furious. And Shameful. Who does she think she is? Was it perhaps my fault for pushing her and just throwing myself at her with that kiss? What was I thinking in doing such an action on her? I would never act like that or think to do it, I am a gentleman, I might not show it but I have never had no intentions to be this way. I still blame her. She is the one who has made me a whole different being. My brother has told me once you find your mate, everything just clicks, they are your equal side and they supposedly make you a better person. He’s wrong, since the minute I saw her I knew she would be trouble, I knew she would not be the right fit for me.
How could she push me away like I was not worth anything. I have feelings. Wait? Do I? I never understood the purpose of expressing feelings. We feed on humans, I have no sympathy for them only that they keep my thirst down. But when I saw her, I felt the world stop, my main focus was on her and only her, not only because of her beauty but the aura she gave. I for once felt my unbeaten heart beat, I felt like I was suffocating from her scent, but at the same time I felt at ease. I still do not understand her purpose of being difficult with me, if I didn't spend our longest time together arguing with her I would've gotten answers to my questions.
Maybe it is my fault as well, I have not been there for her. Marcus advised me to spend time with her to actually get to know her. He also warned me that I should be easy with her, she will never be able to see her family unless they come here. But what do I do instead? I basically seduced her with my charm and thought that would be enough to seal the bond. What an idiot I can be, but at the same time I at least tried to give into the bond, unlike her. She would just turn away from me and act like I was some low life, like a pest in a common sense. Who gave her the right to treat me in such a way? Maybe her brother was the one who influenced her to be this way with me? I knew that vegetarian vampire had it out for me, it only makes sense since he left, he probably knew she was my mate this whole time.
She's such a child to top it off. Running away from a bond that is grander than any bond to existence, and yet she turns away from it like a coward. Just like her brother, always going on and off from having mortals or not. In the time she has been here, she is still not drinking human blood. I thought by now she would have converted to our diet but it would seem I was wrong. Another thing to add to my list of changes; being wrong. I have always been right and if someone goes against me then they will end up being sorry. She’s changing me more than I care to ever want.
Y/N POV
It's been a month since I last saw him, even before I would at least catch glimpses of him or he would approach me. He’s nowhere, I even asked some of the guards if they have seen him but I was met with disappointment. Not even Aro or Marcus have been any help, well I haven't actually talked to Aro yet, he still creeps me out. My mind has been rehearsing over and over in what I will say to Caius, it's all I can really think of. And to think it's only a month, it has felt like an eternity, considering I have been around for a while now, it cannot compare to this month alone. I think I am finally losing it, I believe I am going mental now. The way my mind is being filled with endless thoughts and worries is really pushing me into a not so pretty mindset. I want to cry but I know I am unable to, I want to scream but what will that solve? I want to run away but Demetri would just track me down in an instant. I want to drown myself in books to at least distract my mind but I know whatever I read it would only be twisted and I would be thrown back to thinking about him.
I even stopped hunting, I haven't had not one ounce of blood since the last day I saw him. Why do I deserve to satisfy my thirst when I hurt my mate? Oh my mate, how much I am longing to be in his arms right now, telling him how sorry I am. To tell him what an idiot I have been this past half year, to tell him my fears of not being worthy of him, to tell him it's me and not him no matter how foolish that sounds. It's the truth there is nothing wrong with him, not even his anger issues bother me, on the contrary I love how he is not afraid to show his intense emotions out. Oh? I said the L word, well it's no issue to me because I think I do love him. How fucked up is that really? It took for him to stop coming up to me to finally realize I do have love for him.
I have been spending this whole month, when I was not looking for Caius, pacing in my room growing more and more mad. Not the emotion mad but like mentally losing it. But I think I am also mad, I mean I am trying to make it up to him but he won't even give me a chance. It's frustrating really. Oh no. Is this how Caius was when he was trying to seal the bond but I just turned away from him? Now I am really feeling the pain and guilt, this torment is just so painful for anyone to face. I made him go through this, I really am a monster.
I fell to my knees in defeat as I buried my face into my hands, the venom started to fill my eyes. All my walls started to crash down on me and I could feel myself almost physically hyperventilate as I was trying to remember to calm myself. I felt my old human self creep up. In my human years I would have my breakdowns after each lecture my father would give me. His talks about me being the ideal respectful woman would get to me too much.
His preaching never got easier, he even would force me to attend his social gatherings with other men so I could be viewed as an available choice as a wife. When my dad was not having an eye on me, those men would stare at me shamelessly, it made me feel gross and caused me to have a desire to be alone. Another reason why I avoided any type of civilization when me and Carlisle went our separate ways.
Maybe that’s another reason why I was also being harsh toward Caius, I feared he was going to be like those men. It didn't help his case to be proven wrong when he kissed me or the way he seduced me endless times. I need to talk to him.
Caius POV
I feel foolish avoiding my own problems. I tend to get to the bottom of things but in this case it's different. How can I solve this? Wouldn’t it make sense for her to come up to me and apologize for her childish acts? The way she wouldn't even look me in the eye when I talked to her? Or how she would respond to me with a snarky remark? Gosh I think I love her attitude, even if she did hurt my feelings by rejecting me, I think I fell for her more each time I would approach her. But when she pushed me away, I noticed her attitude was true. Why would she want to be with a vampire who has the title of the ‘ruthless one’ out of the three? I never cared for what others think about me but with her, everything suddenly mattered. I wanted her to accept me for me.
My reputation means everything to me, I am the one who does not show mercy and I am the one to not give second chances. As for her, I would give her endless chances if it means she gets to be mine, only she can get her way with me. I would not let anyone know how her rejection has hit me, I would rather let my anger take over me to let others know she has no effect on me. Why is loving someone so hard? Love for me was always something I viewed as a weakness, look at me for merlin sake, I feel like being locked up in a room and refusing to be out and about.
It is what I have been doing this past month, I been in my art room staring at a blank canvas. My muse, my inspiration, and my desire to create a masterpiece has left me. Before her I would decorate my walls with weekly original art from whatever came to my mind. And yet when she turned away, my yearning vanished like I drop my helpless dead meal fall to the ground after I drained them.
A while ago I was painting her, I happened to decide to work outside on a little platform reserved for me only and I happened to spot her in the gardens. I never revealed myself to her but I had a perfect view of her staring off into the distance, the right lighting was even hitting her and the scenery around her was every artist's dream come true.
I only got to sketch the background because I wanted to spend more time on just her. How she was posing unaware of my eyes on her, how her lips were slightly parted, how the wind picked up her hair slightly after each breeze. How her eyes held so much emotion while her other facial features stayed relaxed. She was and still is breathtaking to me. I could spend hours drawing different sketches of her if she were to let me, I even got an idea of a new statue to add in the gardens, it would be of her.
She’s like a reincarnation of Aphrodite, no I am mistaken she is more bewitching than the goddess herself. How have I gone a millennium's without witnessing such beauty in my life? I need her, she’s my missing muse.
Y/N POV
When I was finally mentally composed enough I walked down one of the many hallways to head to the throne room. I have a feeling he might be there, I don't know where else he could be and nobody has told me about his whereabouts. I arrive hoping to see him there but only Marcus and Aro along with some of the guards who are within the shadows are there. I want to yell at them but I compose myself.
“Aro, Marcus, where is he?”
Aro who as always tends to act unaware of things unless it is of interest to him decides to mess with me.
“Where’s who?”
“Look I have kept my patience for a while, but if you dare to test me today I will gladly knock you out again but this time it will be a month”
The hidden guards stepped out from the shadows after my little threat, already recognizing them I knew I could take them down. I was lucky that Jane and Alec were not around because my chances of winning would be low.
“Why should we tell you where he is? Haven't you hurted him enough? I seen his thoughts I know the suffering you have put him through since your arrival”
I wanted to rip his head off so bad. How dare he meddle into mine and Caius' life? Soul brother or not, what me and Caius go through is our own business. I know he makes some sense about the suffering and pain but I have gone through my own pain also. Marcus settled a hand on Aro shoulder before I could think about attacking him
“Aro it is not our business to intercept into our brother and his mate's issues, my dear y/n he is in his art studio. Felix? Demetri? Would you mind taking her to his studio?”
They were both by my side and led me away. Good thing these two were taking me away, they are the only ones who would manage to stop me from attacking. It was a quick sprint and they nodded toward two large mahogany doors, it looked like it was indeed doors to an art room. It also seemed handcrafted, I had never seen such gorgeous details on a door before. I opened the door slowly to do a small peek into the room to see if he was there. He was there on a stool with a loose button up shirt that was open at the throat and he had some casual black slacks. His hair was a bit messy even and yet he was the most striking being I have ever seen in my lifetime.
His gaze snapped at me as I was closing the door, his irises were matching his pupil from his lack of feeding. His eyes also matched mine, since I was also pushing away the need to feed. He watched my every move like a cat watches a mouse before pouncing on it.
“What do you want?”
“I-I I want to talk to you”
“Is that so? Took you a month to come to some senses did it?”
Well that hurt, I already knew he was going to be a bit sharp with his words yet that line hit me a bit hard.
Maybe this was a bad idea, maybe I still need time to be able to calmly talk to him. No, no keep yourself together y/n, I need to do this for not only my sake but for Caius.
“Well go on with it, I don't have all day”
“Look if you are going to start having an attitude with me then maybe we need to wait another day then to talk”
“I am not with attitude, I am just trying to get to the point, I don't like to dance around issues”
I took an unnecessary gulp like Carlisle would do when he would break bad news to me.
“I love you”
The pencil he had his hand fell to the ground and that was the only noise that was heard after my words.
“I know you're probably thinking, how cruel can I be to say that after everything that has happened between us but it's the truth. It's always had love for you within me but I was scared to open that door, you see I wish we could turn back time and I could explain to you everything that has been going through my mind before that fateful day. I wanted to tell you something but you left before I could and-”
“Then explain to me why you have acted like a child”
His voice lost its sharpness, instead it was soft, the same softness his eyes reflected currently. I wanted to melt on the spot by how sweet he looked.
“Before I was turned, my father would display me like some doll to show others of my availability as a wife, when he was not looking the men he was presenting me to would basically undress me with there eyes, some of them would be brave enough and leave lingering touches on me after I would shake their hands, the only males in my life I trusted after that was Carlisle, even in my time when we were apart I was never near civilization, I feared for the day I would have to be around others.” He stood up from his stool but he stayed at a distance from me still.
“When I saw you I thought it was time to heal completely from my trauma, but with the way you would approach me it gave me slight flashbacks from the past, and it made me recoil from you a bit, but at the same time I wanted to be by your side. What didn't even help my case was I had a fear of not being enough for you. How can a vampire like me who has such fears be worthy of a king like you? You deserve someone who doesn't still feel an ick when she’s around others for too long. I felt if we were to talk sooner then we wouldn't be in this position but no you just did a quick and go, made me feel unworthy of your time even”
I wanted to say more but I decided to give Caius a space to talk also, I wrapped my arms around myself for comfort and looked away from him. I feel exposed and anxious just standing here in silence, waiting for him to say something. Please say something already.
“I was not expecting you to even start this with those words”
I knew it was strange to say that but I mean I wanted to reassure him I do have feelings for him.
“I think you make a great point in we should of had a civil conversation at the start of this to avoid our current issues, I-I apologize for my behavior, it was uncalled for and inappropriate of me to try to nurture our bond by seducing you in such a way, you should of been treated like a queen with respect and love. But you are wrong of not deserving me, on the contrary I feel like it's the opposite, you deserve someone better than me, after all the shit I put you through without knowing what you been through, Marcus advised me to be there for you and yet I was hardly there”
I felt my eyes fill with venom again but I was still not looking at him so he was not aware of how I was reacting to his declaration.
“But at the same time I thought it was a bit foolish of you to try to back away from me, you should know from now on that when it comes to you, you can tell me whatever you want, no matter how harsh or straight forward your words might get, I can take it, you are my mate after all. I never want you to feel uncomfortable around me or feel the need to distance yourself from me either because I cannot bare being separated from you, incase you haven’t noticed I haven't been feeding lately either, much like I can see from your once glowing amber eyes that I manage to fall for, but back on topic we can work on your healing process together, no matter how long it takes we do have forever after all”
I looked up at him finally to be met with eyes filled with venom too. Not really having control over my mind or body I ran to him to pull him into a deep hug. His arms not thinking twice wrapped around me like if it were second nature to him. At that moment it felt as if our issues never existed and we were happy once again, so this is how Marcus felt with Didyme, now I understand why he was so worried for us. I would rather kill every being who dared to harm Caius in any way, than to see him suffer anymore than he needs. We fit perfectly into each other, it felt like we were molded into one another, it felt like home. I'm finally home in the arms of a man I can trust and…love.
I looked up at him and gave his cheek a kiss. I was going to kiss his lips but decided to pull a Caius in this situation with a simple “Com tempo”. He smiled lazily at me at the sudden realization that I used the same two words he said to me a while back.
“I'm willing to go into this bond fully, no more avoiding you because that only causes more harm for us. I don't want to be separated from you either because with all honesty the moment I saw your eyes I was enchanted by you, for a moment I saw a whole future with you and even though I was recoiling from you after each encounter with you, I couldn't help but fall for you a bit each time. Even that kiss made my stomach weirdly flip”
He caressed my cheek with his thumb while his other arm was wrapped snugly around my waist as we was listening to me. Whereas my hands rested on his chest, I was trying very hard not to look at his exposed chest and or his collarbone, because even this small exposure of skin looked like art.
“I vow to never become one of those filthy sorry excuses of men, if I could I would hunt them down one by one and drain them completely. No one will harm you, I would certainly never dream of creating such misery for you. But why don't we take some time to spend together and just get everything out. Hmm?”
“I would love that Caius”
He leaned in to give my forehead a tenderful kiss that would have woken Sleeping Beauty herself up.
-------------------
Epilogue
‘Dear Carlisle,
As I write to you, me and Caius have come to be in a better position. We are spending more time together and we have brought up any miscommunication we failed to address from the beginning and solved them up one by one. We are at a point where I feel like we have known each other since the beginning of time. I never felt more at home since before mother passed. Caius really is my other half, we even spend hours in his art room, drawing whatever. He tends to create masterpieces of me being his muse. I even included a painting to this package I am sending of the painting I did from my garden here in Volterra.
I feel more comfortable around the others even, that ick I would tell you about is finally gone and I could spend hours with the guards who I have grown close to. I can never forget to tell you how whenever I talk to Marcus, I see a piece of you in him, I miss you so much but this is the closest I have to having you near me. I hope you and Esme plus the kids are doing well enough. Maybe soon enough we'll see each other, and tell Alice I forgive her, I now know her true intentions and I thank her”
Love y/n”
As Carlisle finished reading out loud the letter to Esme he smiled at the part of seeing his sister soon. But he did not forget to mention to Esme a ‘Finally” after realizing his sister is finally happy with her mate.
#caius volturi#caius imagine#volturi kings#caius x reader#volturi#caius volturi x reader#caius volturi imagine#twilight renaissance#the volturi#the twilight saga
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something that stuck with me once, way back in middle school when i was still learning how to write - my teacher said "writing shock and tragedy is easy, it's humor that's the hardest."
i have been up and down the halls of academia. i have the fancy degree and the experience in publishing. i think i paved most of my own road with the little bricks of sorrow i had stored inside of me. i know i did it mostly with works that are blisteringly lonely. i know why we write like that. it's lifesaving.
but yeah, i mean. i also know how much people think that "sad" media is the same thing as "good" media. our human desire to connect is so hard-pressed that we immediately latch onto any broken themes. the bullied kids and the tales of inspiration. people keep saying things like "glass onion" and "everything everywhere" weren't actually good. because, you know, they're. happy. or happy-ish. happy enough. and we only value art if it's grimdark-adjacent.
do you know - people still consistently whine at me that my writing would be so good if i just capitalized things. i used to flinch. i get kind of a weird, vindictive little rush these days - i get to say thank you for the comment! i have chronic pain and this is how i conserve my hands so i can write more during the day :) grammar isn't real anyway! and now they're trapped in the room with me, you know? i get to pull out my map and show them how grammar is not the same thing as good writing.
writers have this thing. we scratch at our insides, constantly, prying our lives apart into splinters. prying the splinters apart into atoms. when we combust something into poetry, we control it. it cannot hurt us if it exists outside of us rather than burning a hole through the bottom of our lungs. it's not a wonder to me that so much of what i make comes out like a death gasp. i spent a long time at the bottom. i keep going back, too. when you're down there for so long, the only thing you can exhale is fumes.
but humor is hard. humor needs timing; which i can't promise in a paragraph. i can kind-of force it through careful spacing, but i have no idea how fast you're reading these things. humor needs a somewhat awareness of your audience, when really - anybody could be looking. humor needs us to understand what the joke is, why it's a joke, and to think - ha! that is funny. in tragedy, everyone understands the metaphor of a kicked puppy. in humor, you need to introduce them to the concept of a dog.
and forget about positivity. forget about anything not made for adults explicitly. every time i see a well-made children's media piece, i feel fucking horrible for the creators. most of the time, people see children's media as being sort of "not worth" applause, even though i'm pretty sure they have to work twice as hard. i have no idea how hard it must be to not be able to have your character just say. "well, fuck." something about a message of peace or friendship or caring - for some reason, that makes the media not for adults. like, okay. i'm pretty sure my father actually, out of all of us, could use a good book on how to control his temper and talk about his feelings.
but whatever. i write a short story about my ocd, and how it's fucking killing me. it gets an award. it gets published. i write a short story about my ocd, and how i'm overcoming it, and how my days are getting lighter and starting to flourish. i keep getting ghosted. no response. it just is lacking... something.
is this it, forever? you can be an artist, okay. but the trade off is that the things you make - if they're happy? if they're joyful? people will say it's stupid and pandering. you bite your nails off. you file your teeth. you hear something inside of you breaking.
the other day in a writing group, someone i'd thought of as a friend said: "you write so much better these days! i love what you make when you'd rather be dead."
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What funger characters would be like in bed
NOTE: IM SORRY FOR NOT GETTING ALONG TO MY REQUESTS I’m a notoriously slow writer but I didn’t forget,,, thank you everyone for the positive reception
Warning for nsfw text (it’s nothing that crazy, mostly just talking about their orientation and measurements)
Abella: Switch with a dominant lean. Prefers giving to receiving. She’s confident in her body, but gets a little shy about dirty talk. She does not shave…. Ever. Her chest is a B cup. She owns a strap on but has never actually used it before. Very serious about cuddling afterwards! She has a slight preference towards feminine women or feminine men. Thinks girls with glasses are cute.
August: Generally leans more towards a gentle type of approach, he can be convinced to try other things if he likes his partner enough but is usually conservative in bed. More of a giver than a receiver, likes to be romantic but he has a playful side. He bites. 9 inches. Uncircumcised. Has a slight preference towards women.
Cahara: Likes both partners to be equal in bed. Playful. He cracks jokes during sex, likes to make his partner smile. Likes to give and receive equally, but usually ends up being the receiver. 6 inches, circumcised. He trims his pubic hair on occasion, but never too short. Likes ‘all kinds of people.’
Daan: Leans submissive. He’s not exactly shy about sex, but he has trouble enjoying it unless he really trusts his partner. He alternates between being hyper-sexual and completely uninterested. Prefers giving to receiving, as it feels less vulnerable. Might have a thing for voyeurism. 5 and a half inches, circumcised. No gender preference.
D’arce: Switch with no preference. She used to think she was 100% submissive, but now she’s not so sure anymore. Sex is very meaningful to her, it must always be with a monogamous partner and as an act of love. She’s shy, but secretly has an intense libido. Prefers being on the receiving end of things usually. She has an A cup bust but she uses padded bras to look bigger. Trims but does not shave. Likes feminine men and all kinds of women.
Enki: Says he’s dominant, not entirely true. Can actually be a little bit shy sometimes. Very rarely gets in the mood, and if he does he usually just likes to watch his partner go at it on their own. Hates being touched. If he is in the mood to be touched, he prefers receiving to giving. 4 inches uncircumcised. No gender preference.
Henryk: SUBMISSIVE. Doesn’t have a dominant bone in his body. Tries too hard to be romantic in bed. Horrible at dirty talk. No practical experience, he just replicates things he sees in movies. He has no preference between giving and receiving as long as his partner is gentle. Likes to cuddle and fall asleep after. 5 inches exactly, circumcised. Says he likes women, really has no preference.
Karin: Switch. Dominant with men but submissive towards women. Not experienced enough to decide whether she likes to be on top or bottom more. She likes receiving, but is shy about penetration. She’s a DD cup. She never shaves or trims, and the curtains do NOT match the drapes. Openly bisexual.
Le’garde: Leans dominant. It’s very, very rare for him to get in the mood. If he is in the mood, he’s a control freak. He’s monogamous, he only wants one partner and he wants it to be romantic. Always picks giving over receiving, he likes to see his partner squirm... 6 inches exactly, circumcised, hair trimmed evenly. No gender preference.
Levi: Doesn’t like power dynamics. Very touch starved, so even a hug can give him an unwanted tent. (This doesn’t always mean he’s thinking about sex, he’s just going through a late puberty.) Likes giving and receiving the same. Goes very quiet and still when aroused. He wants to get married and maybe even have kids someday. 5 and a half inches uncircumcised. No gender preference, but thinks long hair is pretty.
Marcoh: Submissive. Deeply worried about hurting his partner by accident. 100% monogamous, and has internalized shame and fears about sex. He will never be able to have ‘casual’ sex, it will always be very intimate for him. Likes giving and receiving the same. He has particular fantasies about being tied up. Almost 8 and a half inches, circumcised. He has very thick, coarse pubic hair. Has a slight preference towards masculinity. Likes his partner to have some meat on their bones.
Marina: Switch leaning slightly submissive. A pent up virgin with a high libido suffering from catholic guilt and body dysmorphia. She likes to read erotic novels, and has a lot of curiosity. She flirts often but gets dysphoric and shies away. Hopes to one day meet someone open minded and good to her! Has an A cup bust, but she insists it’s a B. Somewhat preferential to receiving. 4 inches, uncircumcised. No gender preference, but wants her partner to be taller than her!
Nosramus: Switch leaning gentle domme. Has a normal, healthy sex drive. Likes to touch and study his partners. Likes giving and receiving equally. Has both male and female anatomy. She has a B cup chest and a 5 inch penis. His pubes are so long that she braids them sometimes. Has a preference for other non-binary or gender nonconforming people.
Olivia: Dominant lean. Views sex as a healing experience for herself, a way to feel confident in her body. She is not a virgin. Has a fairly high libido. Loves to feel feminine both in and outside of the bedroom. She sometimes fantasizes about being a ‘femme fatale’, but is shy when people actually approach her in real life. She has a C cup bust. Shaves. A well educated woman who knows the importance of aftercare. Likes to cuddle. Closeted bisexual.
Osaa: Dominant, but doesn’t particularly care for power dynamics. He’s not a virgin, but he doesn’t care about sex. He only feels desire towards someone he already knows and deeply cares about, and he cares about very precious few people. 8 inches, uncircumcised. He is surprisingly proud of his size. Prefers giving to receiving. He likes monogamous, romantic sex, though he is weirdly ashamed to admit it. He blames the influence of the All-merian church. No gender preference.
Pav: Submissive and you can fight me on this. Likes rough sex. Likes his hair pulled, likes to be choked. Has not been a virgin for a long time. Has a pretty high libido and has a lot of casual sex. Has NEVER had a long term partner. Likes giving and receiving equally. 5 and a half inches, circumcised. He shaves most of himself and waxes his chest (and ass) because he doesn’t like the feeling of hair. Preference towards feminine women and feminine men.
Ragnvaldr: Wants him and his partner to be equals, the thought of domming makes him uncomfortable. Very nervous about hurting his partner with his….. girthiness, especially if they aren’t as experienced as him. Confident in his body. Always chooses to give rather than to receive, he likes to see his partner in pleasure. Almost 10 inches. Uncircumcised. Likes to kiss and hold his partner in his arms while he does it. No gender preference.
Samarie: A total virgin, never even held a hand. Has fantasized about every position under the sun and has masturbated so many times that her Sylvian affinity has reached its level cap long ago. Has a B cup bust. Never shaves or trims, completely hairy (Unless Marina wants her to shave). Likes giving, receiving, upside down, sideways, on the wall, ANYTHING, but it must be monogamous. Likes pretty girls.
Tanaka: He recently discovered he has a small preference for being dominant. Inexperienced but eager to learn. Thinks sex is pretty cool. No preference for giving or receiving. No fetishes. Only thing is that he likes to hold hands. Penis size is exactly 5 inches and pubes are trimmed neatly. Likes everyone equally.
Bonus
Pocketcat: … 9 and a half inches and it smells strongly (I know some of yall will like that). Oh, and for whatever reason I get the vibe that he’s circumcised.
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