#Don't read too much into that I just find the contrast very funny.

[diloph]

's funny, but I only stumbled across the leaked pilots because I was absently refreshing youtube on the off chance there was a new Alien: Romulus trailer, then they popped up in my suggested feed.

So asides from my Pepe Silvia-style corkboard theories, it turns out I've finally got a tenuous reason for me to associate Marcy with a Xenomorph after all!

[zoropookie]

HOW HATERS ARE BORN (HHAB)

♡ chapter thirty-three — give it time (💋)

“I’ll admit, you made it look like a home.”

You looked around, enamored by the mutable blend of the other’s home. There was oddly a cozy charm that bled in the space, a mixture of contrasts that you wouldn’t have thought he would involve himself with.

There were soft shadows playing against the walls, promenaded by the warm and golden glow of the lamps. It was really elegant in here, yet, meticulously chosen to make you feel comfortable enough to sit down on the obviously expensive furniture.

“Didn’t know you had a…knack for interior design either.” You said hesitantly, looking at a very abstract tiny statue of a triangle on one of the shelves. Even thought you were interested, it still just felt like a painted on canvas for you. Kind of like...the idea that there can be paint on a canvas, but it doesn't make it a painting. "Learning a lot more about you everyday."

"It wasn't my idea," He sighed. "I told the interior designer 'not too many colors', and I guess she thought I was talking about completely mute."

"Feels like a sanctuary," you murmured.

Despite the dismissive words he gave you, the effort that was put into everything was clearly crafted and corroborated. You walked over to the books sitting on the coffee table, the only things out of place from the rest of the textures, reading the hard cover and smiling.

"You're really considering it?" You asked, to which Kuni turned towards you, "Taking care of the orchard outside."

He shrugged, his eyes moving back to making tea in the kitchen. "I don't have a choice. It's either me who does it, or it dies."

"That's not true, you can always pay someone to do it for you. I know there's a lot of people who may want it for themselves, it's completely healthy." You rambled, trying to see it through the long windows. "I take it that was a housewarming gift too?"

"From Furina. Came with the house, thought it'd be funny to see me struggle with something mundane."

"I heard," You grinned, not being able to keep your laugh in. "Love that for you, it's like a package deal! Did it work?"

He sighed again, running a hand through his hair at the thought. "I guess, I don't know," He started pour the tea once the pot began to steam. "I know her goal was to drive me insane. A constant reminder that no matter how far I try to distance myself from complications, they find a way to root themselves in my life."

"Hey, I wouldn't see it as that." You chuckled, the sound mixing with the soft clinking of the ceramic cups he was setting on the table. "It's probably just a way to keep you grounded after everything."

"I don't see the appeal in tending to trees."

"Maybe it's not even about that," You mused. "Maybe it's just about finding a healthy medium in your life, don't suppose you had that before, right?" You said, teasingly.

He rolled his eyes at you, a humored smile tugging at his lips. "You're one to preach about silver linings."

Your jaw dropped, a small scoff coming from your mouth. "I actually came here to truce, thank you very much. Even though you're the one who tried to run away from me — news flash, didn't work, genius. Still pissed off about that. I'm glad that Furina is looking to help you as much as she's looking to out you."

"Running away is my thing." He squinted playfully, "Like she's big help anyway. The only reason she's in on it is because she wants us to have this romance trope going on for real this time. It's stupid as fuck."

You paused at his words, feeling yourself swallow a big lump some of the tea nestled in your mouth. You shivered at the heat that washed on you, pursing your lips in thought as you let the conversation simmer. The two of you standing in a companionable silence. The trees outside rustled gently in the breeze, their leaves a vibrant contrast to the muted tones inside.

"I mean, I don't know," You paused, cringing as your fingers tightened on your cup. "I don't think it's stupid."

Kuni stiffened too, gaze flickering away for a moment before returning to meet yours. There was a certain look that you've never seen before from him. You couldn't decipher his actual feelings. "I figured."

Your cheeks flushed. "Holy shit, never mind if you were expecting it already." You hissed to yourself, trying to ebb how much embarrassment was on your skin. "Look, I need to check into my hotel soon—"

"Sit down." He cut you off, assertiveness in his tone enough to get you to immediately listen, plopping back down. There was an unexpected gravity that was with him, another departure from his nonchalant attitude.

Your heart hammered rapid fire in your chest, a mix of fear and total apprehension were doing a waltz on your general disposition. The more time you were here, the more you worried about the next time you'll make an absolute fucking fool of yourself. You fidgeted with your fingers.

"What really brought you here." He asked, expectantly. "First thing you give me is a hug, and some words of affirmation. You're not here just to catch up, especially after I blew you off."

"I wanted to see you again." You admitted, the weight of your own words pressing down on you. "You owned up to it, left your part of the Internet in a spiral, and then didn't bother to talk to me after that."

He was looking at you, you sensed it. And it wasn't like you could look at him back, otherwise you were going to melt. It was different seeing him from up close, it was an original experience to you if you could name it anything.

His eyes were searching you, despite all you said, as if trying to decipher if you were being genuine. His eyes bored into you like a tiny laser burning your skin. He nodded, a sliver of understanding crossing his face. "You gave me the impression that you were done. I left it at that."

"Yeah, well, I felt like the only one who could leave it at anything was me."

Despite how sticky and tense it was again, you felt relieved that he wasn't as malicious as he was behind the screen. You were relieved that at least the worst of it was over. But it didn't didn't help the burning in your chest, the aching of the bubble in your throat. "Ei really made you do all that stuff? It's not because you really do hate me, right?"

There was no more pretending anymore, no more hiding behind false bravado or dissing each other behind screens like pussies. It was only raw honesty, vulnerable and exposed.

"(Y/N)." His expression softened, a silent dilemma clear on his face. He gathered his own courage, squaring his shoulders a bit and looking at you again. "I'm sorry."

You felt dazed, electricity in the air around you, the world officially tilted on its axis to you. "What?" You accentuated snippier than you intended.

"You were collateral. Nothing that you did deserved what happened to you. Makes sense that you did what you did, you weren't the problem." He explained, shoulders slumped again. "I was behind what I did, at the end of the day; Ei just told me to do it. I'm sorry for being part of the reason you couldn't bounce back. I know if the situation were different, I'd leave you alone."

People kept saying that to you these days, that nothing that happened was because you deserved it. Maybe you never quite got the picture until Kuni said something along the lines of it. You never thought that him apologizing to you would garner the oddest reaction out of you.

Because why was it sexy..? Stop.

"And," He sighed, grabbing your attention lightspeed again. "I would consider liking you more if this all didn't happen. You're alright."

His admission of everything was catching you off guard left and right. You had no idea what to feel with the prominent knot in your stomach. "Do you like me?" "(Y/N), I don't want to—"

"I'm alright, in your words, but do you like me?" Your tone solidified with each word slowly jutting out, assertiveness hardening your composure. "Tell me. Look at me and tell me."

The uncertainly stretched on for what was practically indefinitely. He held his breath, as did you, waiting for his response. Your heart was ruthless against you, beating against your body. He sized you up, seeking an answer for himself.

"...Yeah?" He admitted, voice barely audible as he tried to find his own words. But everything he did think of was so unlike him, out of his personal way of handling things like this. "Yeah. I do."

You blinked, both of your eye contact filling a certain, more romantic space that neither of you even thought was there before today. But the more you realized it, the more you realized that maybe the sexual tension was always there.

previous ♡ masterlist ♡ next

YOU ARE on your way to being one of the hottest streamer in your nation at the moment, racking a monthly average of 10 million viewers, but something specific bothers you about it. you know that a lot of people hate you, but there's this one account. one account that's been following you since the early days of your career. they leave a flood of rude comments in your stream, your moderators banned each account they made, but they keep making more. you are at the end of your tether. but you are yet to find out that this persistent cockroach is none other than your friend's friend (and the only other streamer that's bigger than you), scaramouche.

taglist ♡ @thystarsshine @veekoko @gumickajolli @simonisferal @kamiboo

@justpeachyteastea @feiherp @pinkismyfavcolor @aether-darling @kunisnaomi

@keiiqq @mine-lu @featuredtofu @danhenglovebot @k4zushi

@kyon-cherri @b4tm4nn @iiinaurate @quacking-simp @auroratumbles

@kookiibun @ulquiorraswife @amvpk01 @simplysm1le @h3xi2g0n3

@alatusorrow @scaranthropy @mellowberrie @magica-ren @vernith

@kabukipookie @bananasquash @suqarlaced @dellalyra @lightyagamifan

@yourfavoritefreakyhan @heartsforseo @yomishen @pwushizz @swivy123

@strxwberryfetish @ibyobi @ashfrommars4 @chemiru @ainnofinway

@agaygothicmushroom @levianamor @dragontammerz @wth121 @lylovw

@morgyyyyyyy @lovemari @suniika @littlesliceofcheese @yumejo89

@liuaneee @franaby @tiddieshakeshownu @mimi3lover @kavineyah

@kittywagun (bold users means i'm having trouble tagging you)

[dualityvn]

Hey Nightmare! I replayed your game recently and wanted to explain why I chose music in the survey. I love the game on almost all of its sides, and a lot of them just stayed with me. The sprites are so afshsg, Keith's smug expression portrays a lot of the character that I saw in the blog when he gains confidence. His jealous/worried expression frightens me because he looks very unstable. And about Tene, he really looks like the socially awkward /and dangerous/ dork he is. I can see when he's nervous and when he's relaxed. I can read his face and not misunderstand when making choices around him. Their sprites are more than good for me, they're charming. If I have to be picky I'd say maybe the backgrounds could improve. The characters don't mix well with it, but sometimes that's good because contrast;; and also gives you a mysterious, foggy vibe like everything is just a bad dream and you don't know what is going to happen.

I love the writing too, especially the last date! I got the scary vibe (and the fae painting was great!), it gave me chills. The writing stays with me during my daily life, I love the dialogues and I repeat them all through my brain. I like how you show things, imply things instead of just saying them. I like that the MC is smart enough to know what to do in different, unexpected situations. If anything, I think you could make that feel more natural. For example, sometimes you can choose "I'm not scared" after a scene that freaked your character out. Maybe make us choose the option earlier and show during different scenes how the MC is not scared, that way MC's acts match their words. Still, the writing is awesome for me. The romantic scenes just make me all giddy amdjsk, I wouldn't change a thing about that, and the MC's options during them (i like that I have the option to say I'd put a collar on tenebris, and you can also not be into that just bc tene is). But ofc changing the writing and art is up to you! I shouldn't mention this because it's evident but it's your game and more important than making a game that people will enjoy is making a game that you'll enjoy making and you're satisfied with!

My point is (sorry that was long!) the only thing I don't remember after closing the game is the music. I slightly remember Tene's main theme (which I find funny when it starts playing because it's like HELL YES TENE IS HERE TO MAKE TROUBLEEEE BABY) but the rest doesn't really stick with me. This doesn't mean it's bad, it's actually good but I know it could be better, it could add a lot more than it does. There are some moments when the music goes off (like the first date) which I don't think is a good moment to go off because you usually get worried/scared when that happens. Walking home after the date during night should feel more tiring and nostalgic, yet romantic. There should be a way to differentiate a happy charming, magical night with the boys from a calm, nostalgic nightly path. And if there's a way to add more life to a VN, that's music! It doesn't have to be a masterpiece, but feel more 'full of life' if you get me.

I hope my review is useful and not bothering agshsgs. This is all me trying hard to find things that could be better. The demo is already so so good as it is! I was surprised to see the survey in the first place when you're already doing great and hard work. If you have to point a gun at me to choose, music is my choice. I think a lot of VNs underestimate it (not that I think you do!). I say this as a person who used to undervalue music, I can draw and write but cannot make music to save my life, I suck at it 😭 but now I wouldn't be satisfied until finding the perfect piece.

Take what I say with a grain of salt Nightmare!! Thank you for giving us this masterpiece already. 🙇 Hope you're doing great!!

Hi! Thank you for your feedback and for all the praise! 💕

Honestly, I absolutely get where you're coming from in terms of the music. But sadly, music is something I can't do all that much about. I don't have the budget to hire a composer, so I'm stuck with using whatever royalty free music I can find. I will try to plan it out a little better in terms of when certain tracks play, though!

[lilacmingi]

ALICE IN WONDERLAND AU: YOONGI’S ENDING

My works are 14+ ONLY. If you’re under 14 DO NOT interact with me or any of my works

Pairing: Cheshire Cat!Yoongi x fem reader

Word count: 1,300

Note: There’s no taglist for the separate endings. If you haven’t read the series yet, you can find the intro here or find it on my masterlist which is linked at the end of the imagine

Every single one of them were amazing and beyond perfect, but your heart seemed to be pulled towards one of them in particular.

The answer was simple and you weren't going to sugarcoat it or draw the moment out any longer than it needed to be.

"I choose Yoongi." You decided.

A proud and prideful smirk spread across the cat hybrid's face as he stepped forward.

"It's about time, sweetheart."

He grabbed you swiftly by the waist and pulled you into his side, giving you a quick kiss on the lips as if to show off.

"See you losers around." Yoongi began pulling you away from the group.

"We have to say goodbye." You stopped him.

"Make it quick, sweetie."

Approaching the boys one by one, you gave each of them a hug, saying a brief goodbye.

"Don't let him keep you away from us." Taehyung told you.

"I won't. We'll come visit. I promise." You glanced back, seeing an impatient Yoongi waiting on you. "Well, I'll come visit."

Giving a final wave goodbye, you paired back up with Yoongi who was already pulling you out the door.

"Let's go, pretty." He ushered you down the stone path that led away from Jin's towering castle.

The journey to Yoongi's house was a quiet one. Most of the walk was spent taking in your surroundings and accepting the fact that you would be living in this wondrous place.

It's funny, you were so quick to abandon your old life and weren't worried in the slightest about the fact that you didn't have any belongings with you. In a way, you were starting over completely—and you loved that.

The roof of a house could be seen in the distance, which let you know you would be arriving at your destination in a few short moments.

Yoongi's house was nothing like you had imagined. The exterior was comprised of gray tones and had a chic, minimalistic structure that still managed to fit in with the various mushrooms and quirky flowers of Wonderland.

Truthfully, up until you found out each of the boys had their own places, you assumed Yoongi stayed up in the trees where you first met him.

"Welcome to your new home." Yoongi announced, opening the door so the both of you could walk in.

The interior was decorated in dark hues much like the exterior. Yoongi had a black leather couch and chair along with tables made from ebony wood. The arrangement of furniture was simplistic and appealing to the eyes.

"What do you think?" Yoongi's thumb gently caressed your side while you took in all the details of the living room.

"I love it."

"Good."

As soon as the word left his mouth, his lips slammed against yours, his impatience and longing both evident in the way he kissed you with such eagerness.

You closed your eyes and melted into him, reciprocating his heated actions with just as much fervor as him. The softness of his lips contrasted greatly with the pace of the kiss, which was rough and feverish, turning your mind to mush. His hands that were still planted on your hips massaged them as he backed you against the nearest wall, caging you in while he devoured your lips, nipping softly at them.

When he parted ways, he gazed at you, his turquoise eyes glowing passionately.

"I love you so much." He panted before he began kissing down your neck, the sensation of his lips on the sensitive skin sending a trail of goosebumps down your spine.

Your eyes closed once more as your head instinctively leaned back.

"I love you too, Yoongi." You sighed out, reaching up to run your fingers through his long hair.

You didn't stay in one spot for very long before Yoongi started tugging you down the hallway to his room, which you didn't get a chance to look at as he gently pushed you down onto the bed, hovering over you with a gleam in his feline-like eyes.

"I can't believe you picked me." He confessed, brushing your hair back. "I'm really happy."

You smiled up at him, enjoying the brief moment of vulnerability from him.

"Though I should have seen it coming. I mean, I did assume you liked me, after all."

You smacked his arm playfully only for him to grab your wrists and pin them to the mattress.

"You have to admit I was right. Wasn't I?" He leaned close to your face.

The only thing you managed to utter was a meek, "Yeah."

He smirked down at you, briskly closing the gap between your faces. "That means you're mine." He murmured lowly against your lips.

Your entire face was set ablaze.

He pulled away and gazed down at you.

"How do you feel about that, babe?"

"Um... I—“

"What's wrong? Cat got your tongue?" He smirked before kissing you again.

Two weeks later

A sliver of sunlight peeked through Yoongi's dark curtains, the narrow beam shining across the floor. Turning your head, you saw the man that captured your heart, snuggled up against you with his head resting on your chest.

Yoongi was unbearably cute when he slept. He looked so soft and pure, the sight making your heart melt. One of your hands reached up to slowly run your fingers through his hair. His eyes opened a little and he tilted his head to look up at you, a soft smile playing at his lips.

"Good morning." He rasped, his morning voice setting a flurry of butterflies loose in your stomach.

"Good morning."

"Keep doing that. It feels good." He mumbled before closing his eyes, relishing in the feeling of your loving touch.

You obliged, continuing to play with his hair, twirling a strand around your index finger before letting it go and watching as it partially untwisted itself before combing your fingers through it.

One of his cat ears twitched a little, which made your heart flip. You secretly wanted to touch his ears for some time now, but never said anything because you didn't want to make him uncomfortable. To be fair, it was a weird request.

You looked down at him finding that he was almost asleep again, if not already. Ever so slowly, you brought your hand up and stroked one of his ears. They were really soft-softer than you had imagined and oh-so-adorable. The giddy giggles that threatened to escape you were held back as you gently touched them once more.

After a while, you heard a low purring sound emitting from Yoongi's chest. Your breath caught in your throat at the sound.

"Mmm." He hummed lowly as he tightened his grip around your waist, his fingers almost kneading your flesh. "Keep going, pretty."

The heat in your cheeks raised exponentially at his comment, but you continued to pet his ears nonetheless.

The purring became louder and Yoongi was starting to grab onto the material of your shirt, small sighs mixing with the constant purring.

It was then that you started to ease up on the petting, not wanting to get him fired up so early in the morning.

"You're adorable." You whispered.

His eyes practically snapped opened and he looked up at you.

"I'm not."

"Oh, come on." You chuckled. "Yes you are. Your purring is so cute."

"Don't you dare tell anyone about this."

"About what?" You feigned confusion.

"Good girl." He grinned, the praise sending another rush of butterflies to your stomach.

"Don't you wanna get up and eat?" You asked in an attempt to distract yourself.

"No. I wanna stay here and cuddle with my girlfriend." He raised his head long enough to give you a peck on the lips.

You smiled contently, settling into your pillow.

"That's fine with me."

Masterlist ᝰ

DO NOT steal, plagiarize, copy, repost, alter, or translate my works in any way

[my-favourite-zhent]

Writer Interview

Tagged by the lovelies @commander-krios here and @coreene here

Tagging: @dustdeepsea @thisaccountisagainstmywill @fistfuloftarenths

@littleplasticrat @captainsigge @grossestjay

Questions under the cut!

When did you start writing?

I suppose depends what counts? Where I went to school we did creative writing as early as six. The first stories I remember were Halloween stories I wrote with very unhappy endings.

Writing purely for myself maybe not till high school? I dabbled in a little fanfiction and then didn't touch it again for years and years and then suddenly BG3 and Rugan happened, smdh.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

Just like Krios I enjoy horror novels, although I actually prefer horror as short stories/novellas. If you look at my spotify history you will see a lot of NoSleep podcast and Knifepoint Horror so its definitely a running theme. I could never write horror though, would spook myself too much. I did rather like the tiny horror story in one of the books in Baldurs Gate.

I also enjoy reading low fantasy (low magic, more grit, considerably plucky, ensemble casts) which I think comes across in New Tricks, but in contrast the stories I read have very minimal if any romance.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

Nope, as much as there are many writers I enjoy and at times think "I wish I were that talented" I also don't wish to be a perfect copy of anyone's style because what's the point of that?

I suppose if it was something more like "as funny as so and so" or "world-building on level of such and such" then probably Pratchett, Rothfuss, Sapowski or Glen Cook?

I will literally write anywhere, a lot of my ideas pop-up while daydreaming and I have to get them down when they happen or I won't remember clearly later. So at my desk, in bed, on the couch, on the train, standing in the shoppe, literally anywhere.

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Consuming other media. Books, TV, movies, podcasts, etc. Seeing a scene or circumstance and imagining how the characters I write would react under similar circumstances.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

Hmm hadn't considered it before but I guess so far: grey morality, class differences (this likely due to my muse being Rugan) and overcoming betrayal? I suppose the last one surprises me a little, I think I might just like the angst of it.

What is your reason for writing?

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

I mentioned earlier I haven't touched personal creative writing since high school, although I did consume fanfiction on occasion. I originally returned due to a frustration at the lack of Rugan content. I wanted to consume, but at the time there wasn't much, compounded by the fact that I did not have an AO3 account at the time so of the few that existed I could only see half. So I started by writing how I thought getting that drink at the Elf Song might go.

After that I got a bit attached to the OC and was inspired by the works of @dustdeepsea to write something with a little more emotional depth. I was prone to daydreaming these sorts of things before but I never put pen to paper till now.

I'm happy any time someone enjoys my work, but I suppose the best comments are when the reader notices the characterization I've been trying to get across. It makes me feel validated that I'm able to write certain qualities without (hopefully) being too on the nose with it.

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

Me or my writing? Myself, hopefully reasonable and open-minded. My writing, I hope they find it funny and exciting in turns, I hope it makes people feel some sort of emotion even if negative rather than being boring. I hope the world I've tried to piece together from bits of Forgotten Realms lore feels consistent and cohesive, that the rules and stakes make sense.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

Similar to Krios I think my dialogue comes across the best of all my writing, and it certainly feels the easiest to get down.

How do you feel about your own writing?

It seems to change by day and chapter. There are some things that when I write I'm quite pleased, and then come back a month later and am quite embarrassed by. Other things I didn't like originally but actually enjoy quite a bit on reread. I find myself having to just post things I'm unhappy with at times otherwise I won't get on with the story. I jokingly tell myself "we'll fix it in post!" and I have slowly begun some edits of early chapters so it's not a complete lie.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?

It's mostly what I think the story needs at the time. There are times where I feel "augh we've been on this mood/theme for too long, the reader will get bored" but I try to reframe it to myself as "is the pacing good? is this scene necessary right now?" and that helps me make a decision that is hopefully a bit more objective. Sometimes we need that information for later, sometimes we don't. I have been known to go back and adjust a thing here or there if the current chapter is missing a bit of set-up and will continue to do so until the story is over. I'm treating it all as a work in progress.

Thanks for reading this far!

[lifmera]

OH MY GOD I TYPED UP A WHOLE THING AND ACCIDENTALLY LOST IT OH MY FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOD I HATE IT HERE- anyways *ahem* attempt no. 2 of me asking you for a Hazbin Hotel match because I have never done this kinda thing before and I'm curious :)

GENDER AND SEXUALITY: I'm non-binary, they/he/she pronouns. I generally don't have a preference between the three tbh but I do appreciate ppl mixing it up! I'm sex-repulsed asexual and gray-biromantic. Again no real preference lmfao

APPEARANCE: White, dark blonde hair, green eyes, just below 5'3, pretty basic looking all things considered. I've got a pretty angular face I think. I'm afab and don't shave cuz it's too much work. I wear pretty much exclusively graphic tees(band shirts, dumb jokes, fandom stuff... that kinda thing) or button ups with funky patterns paired w/ the comfiest pants I can find, but occasionally I'll pull myself together enough to make a dencent(?) outfit, typically reminiscent of shit scene kids in the early 2000s would wear. I also like dying my hair but usually don't bcuz I procrastinate on it for too long.

PERSONALITY: If I had to describe it in one word? Unhinged. I am unhinged. 7/10 people will agree I am a very frightening person to be around. I say out of pocket shit(ranging from vile sex jokes to just straight up threats of violence) pretty regularly. I also like to sneak up on ppl and make very loud noises just to see their reactions... *ahem* anyways, despite all that, most of my friends would also describe me as caring and loyal! I have low empathy, so the only way I ever understand any of my friends emotions is by using my own experiences to compare and contrast until I have a decent idea of what's going on in their head, but I AM very good at psychoanalyzing people and providing objective, unbiased thoughts & advice on their situations. I would also literally go to war for my friends. Like, if you hurt one of them say your goddamn PRAYERS because I am coming to your location with a knife and murderous intent. I'm kinda awkward & shy at first, but at my core I AM an extrovert. I just don't know how to talk to ppl bcuz I am ✨neurodivergent✨(autism & ADHD) and have a hard time approaching ppl bcuz I don't know if they'll like me or not. Typically I make friends by making very loud jokes and waiting for somebody to approach me because they like my sense of humor. Which speaking of, I am very funny! Most people I interact with regularly would agree I am a very funny person!!! I'm also really good at media analysis and making arguments. I don't do well in debates because I choke under the pressure(gotta work on that tbh), but I'm good at writing argumentative essays. Plus, I'm pretty good at just bold face lying to people so overall I can be pretty damn convincing. I like adrenaline rushes and try to actively seek out new experiences as long as I'm confident they won't cause me any significant damage(socially or physically) in the long run. Which is unfortunately not many because I am INCREDIBLY paranoid. Like to the point of accidentally staying up til 3am cuz I'm convinced someone's gonna break into my house and kill me... I also have depression, severe dissociation issues, and existential dread which is. Fun. That's fun. I also have a tendancy to go down random rabbit holes and obsess over inconsequential details in shows I like to the point of making whole ass conspiracy theories :)

LIKES: Cartoons, drawing, writing, acting, singing, reading fanfic, watching YouTube, long drives, listening to music, jumpscaring ppl, being funny, ziplining, problem solving, video essays, ghost hunting shows, supernatural stuff in general, psychology, media analysis, frogs, sharks, ferrets, cats, violence, chocolate, Drawfee(YT channel), glitter, and just. So many fandoms. Just so many.

DISLIKES: Slimey shit, being touched(most of the time, there are occasional exceptions), being touch starved DESPITE not liking being touched, ppl insulting my interests(only I get to do that), media illiteracy, projects I'm not invested in, ppl putting preasure on me, mosquitoes, existential dread, dissociating, being tired all the time, being wrong, taking risks, feeling vulnerable, and stories with a lot of potential that just. Don't do anything with said potential.

PREFERENCES?: Uh. Someone significantly taller than me(shouldn't be hard Hazbin characters are fucking huge) that'll listen to my insane rants and is able to match my energy.

Akdncksmfnsmdsn I rlly hope I did this right again it's my first time doing anything like this-

HEYYYYYY!!! FINALLY GOT TO YOU 😜

Honestly I was debating on like a few different characters BUT!

I’ve decided to pair you with… LUTE!

Honestly I think she’d also be sex repulsed. She’s definitely more of a romantic lover! Though she doesn’t show it.

I think she talked to you at first because your style choices reminded her of Adam- and obviously, she misses him like crazy

If you did dye your hair often with her, she’d probably want to help you! I think she’d apply the color so it doesn’t get messy :)

She LOVES your personality. She thinks you are similar to her in many ways!

She also would need to experience it herself. She’s pretty stoic and doesn’t show her emotions. She’d probably think it’d make herself look weak.

I think you both would definitely fight back to back 24/7! You both would fight to the DEATH for each other.

She loves how caring you are for other people- it gives her a different sense of pace. Someone new!

I think Lute would see a TINY BIT through your lies. Lute is very observant with EVERYTHING.

She’d love if you made jokes. She need’s something less boring in her life than just standing there.

Adrenaline rushes? Totally join the exorcists- and you can be her right hand!!

She’d try to help you through paranoia, but you shouldnt worry much. She’s STRONG asf!

She’d LOVE TO HEAR CONSPIRACIES!! she would think they are SO COOL.

Although she isn’t much taller- I think she’d around 5’8 personally. She just looks small bc shes always next to Adam who’s HUGE!

She may not be able to match your energy, only because she’ll need to come out of her shell more- she’s always listening. She has ears EVERYWHERE.

~~~~

HOPE THIS WAS OKAY ❣️

[naffeclipse]

*Arrives at Internet Explorer Speed*

Hey guys! Those new chapter of Lack of Light, am I right??!

FDKHKFGH Sorry I needed to make a silly entrance back in your inbox Naff XD

But aaaaaa I finally came back to read these and I'm here with a brand new comment!! For the two chapters I was missing no less! :D

So let's get to it!

Ok so first off I don't know if I'm just looking too much into it but I read this line: "You rely on your eyes to adjust to the darkness" from th first paragraph and it just felt significant to the rest of the chapter, you know? Very literal but metaphorical at the same time!

And oooh something I definitely have to praise in this is the amazing description of the anguish through all the physical sensations that the reader is going through. I think I've mentioned before that when I read reader inserts I don't truly put my real self in the story but rather try to imagine it through the main characters eyes, but wow did I feel this one. The way you detail all those physical effects that anxiety has on the body, beautifully described through images and comparisons, just made it seem so very real. I basically could almost feel them myself, just remembering times when I had definitely experienced something similar, even if the causes were different! I will always applaud your descriptions, Naff! Makes me want to take notes!

And AAAAAAA I gotta say that I absolutely love how just, hrrrr, I'm struggling to find the words to describe it, but I would say how there's a clear parallel between what both Reader and Eclipse are going through?

Because ok, first of all, is the matter of hiding right? Reader seems to be trying to hide (kind of like Eclipse does his true self), but through a mask instead of blindness. Even through previous encounters they have tried to present themselves a very specific way. The unshakable one. Unaffected by everything, at least in a way that goes beyond mild funny venting. And it feels like something they force themselves to do in their daily life, beyond the forest. It's just they're so used to doing it, that it became a part of how they perceive themselves and failing to do so feels to them like they're showing a part of themselves that is intolerable. And aaaaa then Eclipse also because clearly he must have enough experience having met other humans to know that even those that dared stay after learning of his presence ran away after seeing him. So both hide and hide while they wish for more and hate themselves for it, and might even think they don't deserve it.

(Sidenote: I love this description: "The mysterious being who exists in pure darkness, cast by the sun and the moon." Obviously because it references his name (be it a solar or lunar eclipse), but also because it reminds of his strange nature. Because an Eclipse is an event! A phenomenon that is not exactly a natural object, but something that can only be seen under the right conditions!)

And oooh speaking about Eclipse and hiding, I just love the contrast between Eclipse's darkness coming from being unseen vs the darkness born from emptiness. Because Reader so far hasn't been daring at all in pushing to see him, because they fear the latter. Eclipse's nature is intimidating, and it's often said that we fear not the darkness itself, but what we might find in it. But here it's the contrary! Both Reader and Eclipse fear that potential emptiness. They have found company in each other thanks to the darkness, but should something go wrong (pushing too much or scaring the other one away), they would find themselves staring into the void and nothing else.)

And that exactly leads into the doubts about what the other thinks once they've revealed themselves! And it's so interesting how they fear so intensely that the "flaw" they see in themselves, which are kinda opposite, is what will make the other regret meeting them. Like for Reader is that vulnerability, that inability to be perfect about everything that hits them in their daily life and dealing easily with it. They fear their "weakness" will disgust a great being as Eclipse. And for Eclipse is fearing that his form, great, strange, intimidating, monstrous, is what will leave him without his dear one. His very nature enough to drive them away. When in reality, it's likely those very things that made them initially appealing to the other! The Reader a precious little creature, that despite not having horns or sharp teeth lives their daily life bravely (enough to befriend a shadowy being). And Eclipse, a fascinating and fearsome creature, that despite it all demonstrates he's gentle and kind and capable of becoming that friend that provides the most comfort in Reader's life!

Ooooh I just adore how two very different beings, with way more differences than similarities, still have this experience in common. That fear and uncertainty about letting themselves be known, because past experience has thought them it's unwise, and yet they find relief from that terrible all-consuming anxiety when they let themselves trust that this time it will be different and that it is worth it, even if it is raw, to open up and let the right person in.

Now for Mothman Moon!

Just starting and the Reader is already turning the headlights on and off repeatedly jfhdsgkh Prime conditions for Mothman sightings! XD

Oooh I love how you build up the paranoia! Different situations, but it makes me think when it's late at night and for whatever reason you need to go out in a hallway of your home and you gotta reassure yourself that no, there's nothing lurking in the shadows of your home, be an adult and walk calmly jghdkfsj The feeling of being exposed and on edge is so very well achieved! But also all the little hints, like the raven falling quiet. And that instinctual feeling of being watched! Related to all this, I adore this line: "Your optimism slips in the slightest before you yank it back up by the throat and continue marching along." I felt that in my soul fkijhdfgkñjh

Aaaa I love how everything falls quiet at the flapping of wings! Everything knows to be quiet and freeze. And I love Reader is part of that everything. Like they are connected to the forest around them by virtue of not wanting to draw attention to themselves, something they share with all the creatures around.

And oooooo such a spooky sight when we finally get a glimpse of him!! Kinda gave me the urge to hold my breath as well as I read! Just the sight of the glowing red eyes coming from a shadow within the fog would paralyze anyone for sure! And then gjhfdkg poor Reader just shifts horror flavor from Creature-in-the-forest-that-could-kill-me to Stranger-Danger. Pick your poison and all that XD But man that instinct does seriously kick in when a stranger gives us bad vibes huh?

(As a sidenote, I love how you've given the different readers between chapters different responses to fear! Like the first chapter with Sun had Fight if I remember correctly, then the second chapter had Fawn, which I think it's trying to please to prevent from being harmed, even if the fear wasn't so much of Eclipse but of abandonment, and in this one we have Freeze! Which we see twice when Moon first appears and then when the car races towards them!)

Oh. My gosh??? The fact that Moon is just able to take on a car that's going full speed though?? Damn! And oooh he was not happy. He does not appreciate assholes/downright murderers in this area. (Btw I can't help but think that he did in fact break that second light slower on purpose to seem more menacing fjkhdaskjh)

Aaaa it's fascinating how he seems so perplexed by the Reader's response to everything that just happened! Like he doesn't quite understand the freeze response. It's something animals do as well, but I'm guessing if it doesn't work then most would ultimately run from the danger. It's probably the first instance of this he has encountered! And poor reader seems to just be very badly affected by it, physically as well as mentally judging by the lightheadedness.

(sidenote: "He looms, his wings flaring out beside him in magnificent flares of warnings and death." Me, helpless DCA simp, vivid image of the majestic view in my head: Um yes, hi, hello? 👉👈 GFÑLKDJHGÑLJ)

And aaaaa I loved the flight scene! I myself am pretty scared of heights so I likely would have screamed gkjhfdksj but! I love that we continue the theme of braving a bit of the fear to discover something wonderful! Despite my fear of heights I've always imagined how wonderful it would be to have wings and this scene just striked me as something terrifying yet beautiful because it really is an experience that Reader wouldn't get anywhere else! And despite the polarizing feelings of fear and safety just warring inside of them, the wonder was just so tangible as Moon carried them through the air!

And ooo I find it so interesting how he refers to multiple things as the "lights", which from his perspective must be the most notable characteristic of the stuff that emanates it! It's clear he's familiar with cars, and likely has witnessed what happens when one hits a living thing. And the light of the gas station tells him that it's a place humans go to. So he knows it's not just lights, but he still seems to perceive it as their most important characteristic. Aaaa I'm so curious about what the world looks like to him because of this!

And ough it's so sweet he keeps watch over them as they go trying to get the help they need. It seems to me he finds them really intriguing and the fact that he gave them his name could mean he hopes it will not be their last meeting!

And that's that!

Aaaaaa everytime I come back to your writing I keep being taken by surprise by how well you manage to make the reader immerse themselves in the story! Your descriptions are so vivid and your use of the language so *chef kiss*! Everytime I'm just dying to know what's the word that follows the previous one, what will happen, and when that tasty tension you build so well will reach it's snapping point! This little series was a delight to read and a very nice journey into what fear and darkness means to different people. And of course, meeting some very strange and fascinating creatures that make the unknown not as bad as it seemed <3

Thanks for this delicious chapters Naff! It's always a delight reading what you make! 

(Sorry if something is phrased weirdly btw, it’s kinda late as I’m writing this fgkjhdsk)

AHHH CHAOTIK! HI, HELLO! WELCOME BACK!!! I'm so glad to see you in my inbox again!!

Oh, I am rattling you so hard right now! I live for your analysis and I especially love that you caught how much Eclipse and Y/N complement and contrast each other—the same fears but different reasons. They are dear ones, your honor!!!

And Moon! My Mothman!Moon! He's so much fun to write! I'm really glad you enjoy his spooky entrance and his descriptions!

Also, with the readers, that's so funny that it changes from Fight, Fawn, and Freeze! I meant for Mothman's Y/N to freeze but I also think it's neat to explore different responses to fear, so I'm happy that stood out!

(He did break the second car light slowly—he's so dramatic lol)

He does have a different view of the world due to lights—humans have lights. Humans drive with them, live with them, and are afraid without them. Lights are just as foreign as those humans! But he does have a particular interest in Y/N—they were almost hit by the lights themselves. It's now every time he sees that, but he was curious from how they froze to how they were terrified yet in awe of flying. He even finds them cute but doesn't expect to see them again! But Y/N has plans of venturing back to the words with the mothman hehe

Gah, thank you so much, Chaotik! I love how in-depth you go and reading your thoughts makes my day, babe! <3

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC REVIEW: Ne'er Duke Well by Alexandra Vasti

4/5. Releases 7/23/24.

vibes: human disaster of a man, girls who read Erotica (TM), local romance hero is absolutely stepped on by his heroine

Peter Kent is a new duke, and something of a mess. Some don't trust him because of his legitimately good opinions (he's an avid opponent of slavery, for example). Some don't trust him because he does things like "fucks up a royal wedding with a flock of sheep" and "has naturally beautiful curly hair". His current issue is that he wants to take guardianship of his younger half-siblings... But in order to do that, he needs to win over a lord who does in fact hate him. Half the battle is finding a respectable wife--and he turns to the proper, clever Selina for help. Despite her perfect facade, Selina knows she can't marry Peter. She runs a secret erotic library, after all. But the harder Selina tries to find Peter a wife, the more she fears he could be the only one for her...

I fell in love with Alexandra Vasti's funny, fresh voice when I read her Halifax Hellions novellas. She keeps that tone up perfectly with her full-length debut, which is ultimately a frothy, hot romp about two people who are ultimately good and decent... just prone to some truly wacky shenanigans. It's light but not quite sugary, aware of the world in which it is set and its realities without taking itself too seriously. In short: it's smart. And yes, it does involve hooking up in the erotic library. OBVIOUSLY.

Quick Takes:

--One of Alexandra's greatest strength is just how strong her voice is. She writes in a very witty, very distinct way. Not every line is a zinger-but the way she presents them, her precise turns of phrase, are sometimes so wryly funny that they just paint this vivid image of the hapless characters involved. It reminds me of Tessa Dare, and it makes her stories that much more entertaining.

--Among the novel's most hapless characters, of course, is her hero. Peter is a good guy; but he's not a boring guy, in part because he actually FUCKS HARD but in part because the dude just doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. By no means is he stupid or silly--he's politically active and a strident abolitionist, after all. But like. The dude just can't catch a break. Picture a man who can't help but trip, all the while trying to wrangle two rather rambunctious kids (I am always hit or miss re: kids in romance, but these two were cute and realistically human; they didn't read like mini adults). God love him. I liked Peter so much.

Selina is a great contrast, because though she's kind of wilding out while running this library, she has really practical reasons for doing so, and is overall a super sensible individual. For all that Peter doesn't know what the fuck he's doing, Selina does (except for with sex; Peter for sure knows a lot more about those practicalities, for all that Selina has studied theory). It was honestly kind of a nice change of pace to see this more... not kooky, but definitely messy hero, and a heroine who wanted to put her foot down but just couldn't resist. In a lot of ways, I think this dynamic is often more confined to a femdom interplay. Which is all good and I love it, but it's not what's happening here. Peter's not an alpha, but he's not really a beta either. He's not really a golden retriever, either, but he's not dark. These two felt like they were very much on equal footing, but their dynamic wasn't toothless.

In some ways, I felt like when writing Selina, Alexandra was trying to have something of a departure from the more harebrained, batty heroines she depicted in her Halifax Hellions stories. And I do think she executed that in an interesting way. I mean, I love a batty heroine, but Selina is more of a "still waters run deep" type whose mind is telling her no but her body's telling her yes.

--There's a casual diversity to this novel, which is much appreciated. Our leads are both white, but I do hope we see more of Selina's friend Faiza... perhaps in a future book? And Selina's aunt has a life partner/wife, essentially. The world of this novel is very aware of its issues, and I really appreciate Vasti injecting these issues into what is ultimately a very fun, very light book. You can do both! You just have to try!

--The erotic library... Yes. This is the second historical I've seen recently engage with the idea of romance novels, erotic content for women, and censorship--the other being Lorraine Heath's 2023 release The Notorious Lord Knightly. And honestly? I'm loving it. There's a lot of discussion to be mined from sexual content during the Regency, and frankly, a lot of parallels to be drawn between the forced faux prudishness of the nineteenth century and the censorship of today. Which--terrifying! But nonetheless, this book goes about it in a really clever way.

Because the thing is--Selina isn't just distributing erotica. She's also helping women learn about their bodies and their pleasure. Sexual content is more than titillation (and titillation is great too, don't get me wrong). This isn't a massively political novel, but where it does use politics, it uses them well.

--I really just liked Selina sort of melting into love despite her best efforts. Like, she knows she might be screwing Peter over if they're together. She knows her secret could affect his ability to have his siblings under his care. And this is a big deal! But the heart wants what it wants, and it's making a mess of her.

The Sex:

It's hot! Alexandra Vasti writes really good sex scenes, and while these are more on the vanilla side, they're detailed and sexy and create a vivid connection between Peter and Selina. Like, these two are horny for each other. They literally can't resist.

Also--let's be clear. "Vanilla" is not "boring". These two are fucking against a wall, they're getting off in front of each other, he's punching a hole through a portrait because oh my god he's finally inside this woman. It's good shit.

I did however... feel that we could've had a bit more variety based on the erotic library. There are references to tittyfucking, but like... no tittyfucking. Let's get this show on the road!

This is a really strong, sparkly debut, and I think it's exactly what we need from a historical romcom. You can have a light book about light people while maintaining tension and action! You just have to know what you're doing. Alexandra absolutely does.

Thanks to Netgalley and St. Martin's Griffin for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[toastofthetrashfire]

The Sign Episode 7 Thoughts

Showing abs is apparently necessary for good art (taking notes)

Okay but are they talking about having him paint him, make love, or kill him and make him a part of the art (they keep showing the art tools like torture tools)

That love scene was really beautiful, love the way it makes the art very visceral. The way it's framed reminds me a bit of Hannibal and the way bodies there are framed as art.

Ah so we are intentionally blurring the lines here between love making, art, and potential murder--cause the scene of him washing off the paint is pulled straight from a crime thriller. I like the contrast between the red paint and the blue lighting.

Interesting bathroom, the shot is really pretty, but logistically how do you shower without getting everything wet. The mirror is really interesting though. Practically it's a good way to make sure he gets all the paint off. But it also highlights how alone he is here, with only his own reflection to keep him company.

Yai why are you trying to stop Tharn from saving someone?

These guys are so bad at working, meanwhile Yai is telling Tharn not to get distracted from the job they're already all not doing

Oh I like the way the actor plays Mr. Montree. A lot of actors would overplay the sinister aspect to make sure the audience really gets it, but instead of any tension in his voice or body language, he comes across quite genuine and warm in his responses. We can still pick up the tension if we observe the captain and read between the lines of what he's saying. Nice!

Tharn, darling, maybe don't tip the guy off! I'm glad Yai told him that was stupid

Ah hello again Nat's abs!

Interesting that most of the guests are in black, white, or beige, but Mr. Montree is in blue and Phaya's grandma is in red. Of course those are the colors used in the painting and earlier with Art. It makes sense that Mr. Montree would stand out, but I'm curious why Phaya's grandma in particular. Will she become more important? Is she related to Mr. Montree in some way?

I'd love to know more about the artists and art they used for this episode. There's some really gorgeous pieces

Oh no a broken statue I'm getting Shadow flashbacks

Wait why would they detain Art? It was clearly an accident

Dr. Chachacha stepping up to say Art is his patient, what is this Hannibal? Dr. Chalecter over here! It's got to be an influence right? Cause I was getting similar vibes in the opening scenes too

I wonder if hysteria as a term has the same connotations as it does in Western psychiatry. Like is it still a term that's used medically? Or is it clearly outdated? If it's the later, why doesn't that raise any eyebrows? Either way it fits with his sinister role in the story and the way he riles Phaya up to cause problems and make it seem like Phaya is dangerous or hysterical. Say Art is hysterical and off his meds and you can discredit him. How much of that is Dr. Chalecter using some sort of power on people is hard to say.

Huh, even after that back and forth, I'm not quite sure what the show's perspective is here on mental illness. They aren't necessarily pushing back on the idea that it can make you dangerous, even if there's some nuance added. Though Dr. Chalecter did get in a funny burn telling Phaya: you're not mentally ill, your personality just sucks.

Okay I get that Phaya is acting like an idiot because he's scared, but my patience is a little thin. It's just not a dynamic I enjoy. I'm kind of hoping it really is Dr. Chalecter's doing.

Oooof Dr. Chalecter is over here distinguishing "normal" people vs mentally ill people. Rich and ableist! Despite the copganda the show is at least giving us evil psychiatrists.

No don't bring the charismatic psychiatrist into your police investigation! It's like the captain hasn't even seen Hannibal!

Did Kao's body get put into the art and that's why they can't find him?

Okay I guess I'm glad it wasn't portrayed as him killing out of madness or mental illness, that's a relief.

Tharn's visions are getting super convenient and helpful now. I like the touch of focusing on the clock in the flashback

Imagine being the poor cab driver. You pick up a guy with a bleeding neck and instead of going to the hospital he asks you to drop him somewhere sketchy

Why would you sit in the car to get evidence? Wouldn't that disrupt things?

These two have no chill, why are they bickering in front of everyone's salad. Also not sure why we needed a montage of the meeting.

Kitty Kitty Kitty Kitty!!!

Oh Phaya's little meow to deflect, adorable!

Huh the grandma's comments about not understanding people's motivations and everyone losing their minds are troubling. Feels in line with what the episode seems to be bringing up around mental illness. Even with Tharn's response, I'm not really sure what the show is trying to say about the topic. Kind of similar to last week's take on justice.

Kitty makes the perfect transition shot!

Interesting how the final scenes between Phaya and Tharn here mirror Art and Kao but with very different endings. Both begin in spaces where Art and Phaya make and display their art. Tharn and Kao are invited into these intimate spaces. But the couple's follow opposite trajectories--one betraying that intimacy (Kao) and the other (Thar) deciding to take a leap of faith and trust in it.

Art and Kao make love in a scene that may have just been a fantasy, but, real or not, the scene has a dream-like aesthetic that is edging into nightmare. We then learn they fought and separated.

In contrast, Phaya and Tharn talk, resonate with each other emotionally and come together. They then make love. Like, Art and Kao's love scene, there's a fantastic quality, but this one stays out of nightmare territory.

The mirrors are particularly notable. We end with mirror's capturing Phaya and Tharn together, intimate. While we began with Art in his bathroom, the mirrors highlighting how alone he is.

A final thought: It has been 4 weeks since Sand has graced our screens, now we must wait at least a week more and that is a true crime!

[batsplat]

favorite motogp rivalry not involving any of the aliens ?

you know, the fact that this is so tough shows just how inescapable they've been in the sport. still, I'll give it a shot

you can go several directions here - either stick to the present, or go for stuff this century that's more in the background, or go way way back. I'm reasonably fond of that eighties early nineties period and the varied rivalries they produced between all the anglos... you know, spencer, gardner, lawson, rainey, schwantz, doohan, that lot... (admittedly some haven't massively endeared themselves to me with their post-retirement punditry, but it is ever thus with athletes.) couldn't do that justice here but a few quickfire thoughts

lawson and gardner is one of those fun ones where you have two completely different blokes competing who just fundamentally Did Not Get Each Other at all. gardner was cocky, forthright, brash, whereas lawson was far more reserved, cool-headed, cerebral... and, of course, they didn't didn't just understand each other, they also didn't like each other at all. infamously gardner was not exactly thrilled when his long time rival was signed for honda (gardner's manufacturer) and gardner had to find out by reading the papers

also they shot this safety ad together and apparently didn't speak to each other the entire time, even though they were in close proximity for hours. don't you just desperately want to recreate this with certain riders, hm

anyway, of course there's also rainey and schwantz, probably the one everyone knows... as ever, important they didn't get on and hated to lose each other

all culminated in the dramatic 1993 season, with schwantz determined that it would finally be his year... and it's a classic season, one hears (even if one is unable to judge for oneself), but a title fight with a sad twist when a collision between the two of them at misano ends rainey's career while handing schwantz his only 500cc title. in the end, it also ended schwantz's career, who retired at the end of 1994. of course dorna promised they'd never go to misano again, which they stuck to for a full fourteen years

then again, arguably the vibes were a bit too good back then between riders, like what's all this then (from schwantz)

actually, I suppose none of those were technically 'motogp' rivalries, but. same difference. there's a few in the years after... I do find the whole 1998 250cc season deeply compelling, but it also would feel like cheating because what makes the harada/capirossi thing so fun is that valentino is there acting as the third man. very much the dynamics between all three of them that are so great. plenty of spats in the years after that, but something like dovi/iannone is more just good fun than a proper 'rivalry'. you do generally need some proper development for a real rivalry, and the aliens just monopolise so much attention this century. so you do basically have to fast forward to... well, the last few years, where the most notable ones have been pecco/fabio and pecco/jorge martin

now I do like pecco/fabio conceptually - it's interesting to have this rivalry between two guys who were being moulded into being the marc challengers by their respective manufacturers and then to have had marc suddenly disappear on them. the way it suddenly thrust fabio into the spotlight, how it put all these expectations and pressures on him and essentially made him title favourite overnight... vs how pecco is the closest motogp has had to a dominant force in the post prime!marc era and is constantly uneasily grappling with that legacy. you've got all this uncertainty and insecurity and asterisks and the shadow cast by the greats (who haven't even had the decency to go away completely), the weight of those legacies... also, two kinda funny title fights, if odd ones (especially '22 lol). main problem is that their wildly contrasting fortunes whenever they were title rivals mean they've managed to avoid actually fighting each other on-track. insanely frustrating and the real asterisk for this rivalry

pecco/martin has been strong stuff, yeah. super contrasting personalities, such visibly different riding styles, and considerably more material when it comes to on-track battles than pecco/fabio (still more work to be done though). that intra-manufacturer arc has been fun to follow, this stand-off between ducati's golden boy and the challenger with the eternal underdog mindset. both have a tendency to feel like the world's against them (which is a trait many riders share, sports is such a wonderful breeding ground for victimisation complexes), both are so incredibly unreliable. both rather volatile in their own ways, both battling their own insecurities. also, it doesn't hurt that they've got a bit of shared history as teammates back in the day. would've been interesting to see them as teammates in motogp, curious how jorge reacts to this latest twist... the needle between them has been fun, especially the silly valencia stuff, though I wouldn't mind some more openly hostilities between the pair of them - and I do feel like marc's reemergence has inevitably ensured the two of them are paying less attention to each other. even martin's grand big fuck ducati thing is now more about being rejected in favour of marc than about pecco getting preferential treatment. still, they've got time, could give us plenty more to work with

which is my favourite of those? I don't know... the tricky thing about the older rivalries is that I believe very strongly in evaluating rivalries by actually watching their competitive output and there's only so much of them I can watch. I guess by process of elimination it's currently pecco/martin? for a hot second there I suppose pecco/bez looked like it could be quite interesting, but they didn't really fight for the title and remained friendly so. whatever. it'd be nice if everyone else picked up the slack some time soon

[hxhhasmysoul]

Thanks for sharing your fics recs (especially the KilluGon) most in your list, I have not read them yet... 🤩🌻 Also, love your analysis and reviews, thanks for sharing them....

Okay, so as ItaFushi and SatoSugu shipper, I was curious about SukuIta ship. You are the first person (that I know of and follow) that ship them...Hope you don't mind if I ask you a few things. What do you think are Sukuna and Itadori’s greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic? What make you ship them?

Also, you're the first person that I follow that don't like Gojo (even not entered him in your top 5 fav charas). I don't mean anything negative...I just find it interesting. As a Gojo lover (he's my 2nd fav after Yuji) I found your reasons for disliking him pretty reasonable and I love your metas.....

Happy holiday....

Thank you for your kind words. And I’m glad that my Gojou negativity doesn’t put you off. I haven’t been very kind in my posts about him, they are very ranty. My top charas are honestly related to how much I think about them and how excited I am for scenes with them for various reasons. And like for example Kirara is absolutely on the list of characters I’m always excited for, or: Miwa, Hana, Toudou, Junpei, Nanami, Higuruma, Maki, Uraume, Tengen or Yuki. Gojou used to be on this list because I actually enjoyed how flawed he is, it was: wow this man! A bit like watching an accident happen. But I also find his position in the jujutsu world interesting. Fandom soured me on him and that’s on me. 

______

As to the fic recs, if you enjoy killugon I have reblogged some hxh and killugon fics rec lists over the years: x, x, x, x, x, x, x.

______

“What do you think are Sukuna and Itadori’s greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why?”

Yuuji has it all. He has this sweet side, he’s silly, cute, compassionate and has people skills. But he also has a darker side. He’s lonely, has unprocessed issues concerning forming relationships with others, he doesn’t value himself too much, he has the tendency to blame himself, it makes him suicidal eventually. 

He can be very introspective and self aware but he sometimes chooses not to do that, like his refusal to think about his parents, or he can use it against himself to bash himself with guilt because he can over analyse his shortcomings. Yuuji both seeks connection and doesn’t easily let people know him too closely. 

He’s also very smart and adaptable. He learns very fast, he can analyse a situation well and employ tactics that will often make him succeed in what he’s doing. 

He also has good intuition, like in how he befriends Junpei, how he doesn’t want to be around Megumi during the culling games, or with plans on how to save Megumi. 

Because he wants to connect with people he doesn’t always know when to put his foot down. He’s very good at asserting himself against people who are bullies and who are hostile towards him, like Sukuna and Mahito. With people he cares about though he’s not really good at that. He will argue but with for example Megumi and Gojou he will fall in line. They intimidate him to an extent, they seem knowledgeable and powerful in ways he isn’t. He defers to their judgement despite them failing him.  

Sukuna is funny in his contrasts. I’ve once written that he’s full of shit. He’s the opposite of Yuuji because he refuses to introspect, to analyse himself. He of course has a huge ego so he has a very specific attitude towards people who exert any form of power over him. He gives Kenjaku the cold shoulder and tries to ignore them as much as possible. (Tell us why, Gege. Heian flashback when ;-;) Towards Yuuji he’s just irritable, disrespectful and petty. 

He’s very nerdy about jujutsu, it’s very clear he enjoys it and he enjoys fighting. He believes that others matter only as much as he can get some enjoyment or entertainment out of them. Which is actually not entirely true, because he very clearly has a friendship with Uraume and he’s very mindful of Uraume’s feelings in it. As I said, not self aware. 

______

“What make you ship them?”

The process of elimination. It will be a story XD

When I first read and watched JJK, I came out of it caring very deeply about Yuuji. I liked other characters but Yuuji was and still is special to me. 

In fandom I primarily seek three things: 

1. Art of the characters I like because I just like art and also it gives me extra emotions.

2. Meta and discussions, because I enjoy over analysing stuff and making theories.

3. Extra emotions in the form of fics. I’m only in two fandoms, they both traumatised my favs very deeply. I want to experience other things with the favs. I want them in situations. (mostly long form AUs but not all AUs, I’m picky XD)

With Gon and Killua, point 3 was easy. I find their romantic ship close to canon, I love them both, I wanted more of that.

With Yuuji I wanted something good for him. I wanted him to be prioritised and on the receiving end of love. I wanted someone to care as deeply about him as he does for others. 

So I went on ao3 and started to look into the tags. 

The first one I checked out was ItaJun. I like Junpei, I think he’s an interesting character. Yuuji and Junpei’s canon interactions can be read as pre crush stuff. They hit it off very quickly, share the passion for films. Are capable of talking honestly about deeper and darker things. Most fics in that rather short tag were from Junpei’s pov. Made him very mopy, soft and fragile, introverted in this stereotypical way. And Yuuji was there as the manic pixie dream boy. Next.

So I looked into the ItaFushi tag. It was long so I had hope. Even though I was and am ambivalent about Megumi. And I don’t particularly like his dynamic with Yuuji in canon. I mentioned it above, it’s about the misplaced deference that Yuuji shows Megumi. And Megumi thinking he’s much smarter than he is. Most fics in that tag were from Megumi’s pov. Made him very mopy, soft and fragile, introverted, melancholic and overly intellectual. And Yuuji was there as the manic pixie dream boy. But also dumber than Megumi. Like in the KilluGon tag you can find fics like that too, fics from Killua’s pov by people who don’t care about Gon. In both tags there will also be these kinds of fics but written by people who seem to dislike the “sunshine” character. It’s not just that they find that character to be a tool to make their fav feel better, but that they are kinda upset about it. There are few fics in that tag that I liked, though. Because despite being from Megumi’s pov, they both wrote Megumi and Yuuji close to as they are. 

But generally, I was growing disappointed and frustrated. And I remembered one smut in the ItaJun tag which was actually a poly threeway with Sukuna. I remembered it because Junpei’s pov was nice and the dynamic was interesting. And I was like: well, can SukuIta be really worse than this? I mean if that poly fic was anything to go by, at least the smut will be fun.

So in the SukuIta tag finally, finally, my chance of finding Yuuji’s pov was high. And the authors there are actually interested in Yuuji’s personality. Not all of them do it justice, obviously, but they are interested. They are interested in putting Yuuji in situations. They are interested in tension and high emotions. They are interested in strange, codependent, very intense relationships, even in some of the more fluffy fics. There’s a lot of E rated stuff there, a lot of dead dove. And as I said before, I’m very picky and I won’t click on most stuff, but that was true for the other 2 tags as well. Just that, when I chose to click on stuff in this tag, the percentage of fics I read till the end was incomparably higher than in the other two tags. And reading through it, I started to get ideas to write for it. 

______

“What do you love about their dynamic?”

As I said above, in the beginning I was mostly amazed that I’m getting Yuuji exploration. Sukuna was there as the vehicle for the situations and the emotions. Even when I started writing my first fic, I was of that mindset too. Writing it made me ponder Sukuna more and grow to like him beyond his fun energy as a villain. 

The thing I like about their dynamic is when Yuuji gets to finally allow himself a close and raw relationship with someone, it’s usually very dramatic and dark in the best scenarios. That he carves something for himself, something often imperfect and kinda toxic, something where both sides are forced to make concessions and navigate around each other, but something where he’s prioritised. 

And when Sukuna gets punished for his personality, like the consequences of his irreflexive nature give him anxiety or something like that. When he’s forced to actually self-analyse. Sukuna is about his own pleasure and you can write him in a way that if someone becomes his pleasure, he gets very intense about it. 

At its best, this dynamic is very intense, dramatic and either goes in a very dark direction or requires a lot of negotiation. 

Also true form Sukuna is the hottest JJK has to offer and my dear Yuuji deserves the absolute best.

[roomba-mangga]

for that ask game: 8, 17, 31 & 43 for thistle dungeon meshi ?

8. Unpopular opinion about them

Not sure I can gauge (un)popularity unless it's an extreme example so I guess *skull emoji* the age discourse? Less an opinion and more a personal interpretation of the immortal child archetype, tbh. It's a really interesting concept, super fun to try and strike that balance between ancient and tragically young, and presenting that situation through a high fantasy framework really works to emphasize and demonstrate the nuances of a split child/adult mentality, especially wrt trauma (not to mention fraught family dynamics and neurodivergence).

The tricky bit is that balancing act where you want to avoid adultifying or infantilizing the character within a narrative, which... I think with that whole age debate, people tend to lean into one or the other pitfall, and justifiably so since it's such a tightrope act. Thistle's sense of purpose and security hinges on being a guardian to people who are simultaneously much older and younger than him—essentially being expected to mature at the same rate as everyone else when that isn't physically possible, which was bad enough when Marcille was just observing aging disparity between herself and others, let alone what happened with Thistle. Neurodivergent trauma metaphor I love you.

So he's effectively been playing the role of adult guardian for so long that trying to remove that from his dynamics with others would imbalance him, while at the same time that very imposition of responsibilities is the root of trauma in the first place. It's all very complicated! Whoever cares for him post-canon needs to find a middle ground between those two states, which means any dynamic where he's involved would have a fair amount of role-fuckery going on where he's neither their kid nor their peer, but somehow both at once. And also an ageless entity of indeterminate gender. I shill for Young Old Guy Thistle.

17. Quotes, songs, poems etc. that I associate with them

Brick By Boring Brick (Paramore)

Icarus (The Crane Wives)

Age of Kings (The Mountain Goats)

Bring Her Back (Dirt Poor Robins)

Do You Want to Die Together? (Stars)

Little Soldiers (The Crane Wives)

Honorable mention that I wouldn't actually include in a playlist because he's too aggro, but it's about the principle of the thing: Strawberry Blond (Mitski)

If I had to pick songs for other dynamics besides Thistle & Delgal then...

Thistle & Falin: Community Gardens (The Scary Jokes)

Thistle & Laios: Don't Sit Down 'Cause I've Moved Your Chair (Arctic Monkeys)

Thistle & Yaad: Paper Dolls (Dirt Poor Robins)

31. If they had a tumblr what would it look like?

So there are two separate blogs with severely contrasting vibes and the first one is just a polished site dedicated to the Kingdom's state of affairs and unabashed monarchy propaganda, the crest of Melini is the banner, it has local news and dungeon updates like whatever batch of adventurers have been crushed to paste that day. The other one is his secret vent blog that's mostly pages and pages of poetry (a lot his own) and the occasional meltdown in unreadable cursive font that romanticizes his inner turmoil. Banner would be an exquisite oil painting depicting a king and his page. Reading back I think I'm implying that Thistle randomly has a Tumblr in the high fantasy universe, which is devastatingly funny to me.

43. 3 favorite foods and 3 they despise

He doesn't eat </3

Substitute answer my knowledge of medieval European/Mediterranean food starts and ends at cheese bread and fruit but, placing my bets that his preferences mirror Delgal's—adjusted to be appropriate to his station—because of course they do. He canonically is apathetic towards elven food (who isn't?) given his resentment towards his own race for abandoning him. I like to think that post-canon there's at least one kind of elven food from some loosely SEA-inspired subcontinent that grows on him so he finally has a positive connection to his homeland (... it'll be Filipino or Indian food. Not sure what specifically yet but mark my words)

[constelationprize]

would love to know more about Stuart and wip #4 <3

I have so many thoughts about Stuart it's not even funny. I remember always being a bit fascinated with him in my original read of AFTG in 2019 because he is, and I say this with all the love in my heart, kind of an Uncle Ex Machina. And this year when I came back and did my reread (re-listen?) of the books that fascinaiton returned tenfolds.

The thing about Stuart that keeps getting me is that his original revenge plan against Nathan was insane. And the way that he went about it was even worse. Like, here is the list of steps he went through: 1) Found out Kengo was diyng, calculated that he could deal a blow to Nathan as long as it doesn't piss off the Moriyamas too much 2) Allied himself with the FBI, a foreign government agency, despite being himself the head of a criminal syndicate, even though that could have very easily gotten him branded as a narc 3) Planned to wait until Nathan was released, invade his house while he was killing someone, massacre his inner circle, and probably deliver a dramatic speech as he beat up Nathan and left him for the FBI to find 4) Upon getting to point 3, found his nephew being tortured, confirmed his sister was dead, and promptly changed his plans to kill Nathan on the spot 5) Has now broken his deal with the FBI and permanently removed a Moriyama asset instead of just incapacitating him 6) Left his recently-tortured 19yo nephew to sort things out with the FBI and dipped back to England fully expecting to be executed by Ichirou 7) Somehow managed to talk himself out of this and not only stay alive but become an asset to a syndicate bigger and more powerful than his 8) Profit.

That is insane. He cannot keep getting away with this. How can a man with three appearences have this much chaos going on.

So this WIP is mostly an character study, following Stuart as he grieves Mary and tries to adjust to the changes being part of the Moriyamas bring. It is also about him trying to find out how far he can Manipulate Manspain Manwhore out of situations.

Reason number two behind this WIP was that I was actually surprised to find out that this entire fandom was sleeping on Ichirou/Stuart. They have like 19 tagged fics! That is a crime! Have we lost all respect for toxic yaoi?

I really like playing with foils and parallels and contrasts and in the process of plotting this fic I found a lot of them in the Stuart and Ichirou dynamic. For one, they do have a pretty big age gap (14 years in this fic), but while Stuart has all the experience, it's Ichirou who has all the power in their relantionship. Ichirou who has inherited an empire but is stuck in his father's shadow and Stuart who has an established reputation but lost all his autonomy. Stuart who risked everything to avenge his sisters and Ichirou who killed his brother.

Also, I have a pretty strict Death of the Author stance and thus don't consider Nora's tweets or the EC canon, but I do find the fact she said that eventually Ichirou gets Stuart killed in a suicide mission so he can get a younger head on the Hatford branch (and that Stuart knew that it was going to happen eventually and was fine with it) very intriguing. They are two very ruthless, manipulative people, and I want to play with them like barbie dolls.

[collectorcookie]

OMG I never thought I'd find another person who's obsessed with Northfam... I think about them waaaay too much. Please I need to hear you talk about them more...

oh anon dear, i don't feel like you understand that you just hit a fire hydrant (me) with your car. God, where do I even begin.

keep in mind that i do not ship anyone with anyone else here. If you see me use "snowhi", "ozfi" or any other name combination, i am simply lazy.

Ok so, starting with appearances. It does make me feel a way when I see northfam being the only exception of "most wizards' bodies stop aging at basically 20-30 since that is the age they usually reach their maximum magic potential at". But snowhi are the only ones in the cast that look like children (i'm gonna assume 10 y.o.) and ozfi are also the only ones in the cast that read as old men to me (like...maybe 40 y.o.?). And it's because the twins were all alone and nobody protected them, they had to protect themselves. They had to grow up too young and now they're children forever. However, they got to watch their disciples grow up in ways that was simply never possible for them.

And just...anon idk if you have ever read any extras before. But there is one extra which is just them getting interviewed. And they're just so, so annoying in the most affectionate way possible. I love it when they bicker. They're really funny.

This also happens in main story one, when figaro scolds oz for summoning him out of nowhere, or when oz was like "You're leaving me for chestnuts?" and figaro retorts with "I'm not leaving you for chestnuts, i can get that from any merchant, i'm leaving you for the flores brothers" like ashdjskdhjd the ozfi arguing like siblings for 2000 years is so funny to me.

Also the way ozfi are forever snowhi's babies, they will never stop being annoying mentors to them. It's so funny how affectionately the twins refer to ozfi when ozfi have, like, literally tried to take over the world in the most classic evil villain fashion possible. Behold, ozzyboo and figgypoo:

Yeah? Yeah.

In general, only about the twins now, I think the number one reason why they are so interesting to me is the huge contrast of how nice they are but also their cruel nature as northerners. Like, everything they do goes STRONGLY against northern culture, but at the same time, at the end of the day, they still are very much stereotypical northern wizards to their core. It's this very careful balance of them having human morals and monster principles. It's this weird aura where, if you are around them, you can trust them and let your guard down, but also, there will always be this eerie feeling that you are in danger. That they themselves are something you don't really fully understand.

And to an extent, this goes for ozfi as well. I mean, ozfi weren't as isolated from the rest of the world while growing up as much as snowhi, but still. Wait there was another interview, but this time about the authors and what they keep in mind when writing the characters. lemme just

Like GOOOOOD THE "Perhaps there's a trick somewhere for Northern Wizards to have a long, continuing relationship" LIKE DO YOU WANT ME TO CRY.

yeah idk. You'd expect world's most ancient wizards to have huge castles and be super bougie and what not (and i mean eventually ozzy does make his own castle in the north) but it's the idea that there was once a time where northern twins, killing machines devoid of human morality, picked up fifi, their first ever contact to the outside world, and taught him everything they know. And then they did the same thing to oz, the literal personification of the north, a beast that does not understand affection in the slightest. Do you understand what i'm getting at. It's the twins (who were never loved by anyone before) and figaro (who was distantly worshipped) trying to love oz unconditionally (who does not even know how to receive love at all) that really gets me. They have no idea what they are doing but THEY'RE TRYING. They're so close to each other but so, sooo far away. Northfam is so soft and warm but also so cruel and cold to me, idk. Not to mention that snowhifi have raised oz KNOWING OZ CAN LITERALLY KILL ALL OF THEM. Accidentally or not. Like. Talk about unconditional love. Can you imagine raising a baby that may or may not kill you if it cries too loud.

They're not really family or adoptive family or even found family but more like, creatures trying their best to learn how to love in a world that really, really doesn't want for them to love at all.

I have a soft spot for non human characters trying their best to learn okay.

And arthur. Man, arthur. The way he singlehandedly changed oz. Northfam also got a lot closer to each other once arthur got picked up by oz. That's also funny to me. I get the feeling that northies can never really let their guard down so the fact that throwing a central baby (with no sense for self preservation) onto the most ancient, powerful, terrifying wizards is aaaall it took to reduce them to certified Dads™️ and Grandpas™️ is honestly great. Lemme also just

Oz trying to keep his distance to arthur because he's scared uuuuuuuueeeeee

In general, northfam consists of:

Snow and white: generational trauma while being first generation of anything ever. Not the best parents but they get a star for trying

Figaro: eldest daughter core

Oz: high maintenance forever baby

Arthur: precious angel who is nowhere as mentally ill as he should be tbh

Also anon, i have like three other northfam posts i wanted to make and i guess this is my sign to actually post them now. If you wanna come off anon, my dms are open for talking about wizards always.

[implied-divinity]

(nsfw) death note headcanons (AU from a fic I read by anotherlostsoul on ao3 where L knows light is kira and is super into him anyways)

light and L are obviously together. they have a lot of sex. like a lot. ESPECIALLY during work. they lie so often that they're going to investigate in another room and then start moaning each other's name as soon as they're out of earshot. ryuk is the guard

Light mostly tops, but they switch sometimes. they have a huge variety on what they do because of the amount of sex they have. that includes: eating out, using food/sweets, oral, nipple play, a LOT of missionary(looking each other in the eyes, communicating through eyes), degradation/praise, God roleplay

I hate to admit it but L would like footplay. I feel like light wouldn't like it that much but begrudgingly plays along when he felt like being nice

they are exclusive when it comes to dating. with that being said, they also have sex with other people and they both find it really hot to know the other person is doing so, yet will ultimately come back to each other bc love and shit

light semi regularly fucks mikami to appease him and to keep him obedient. but when mikami becomes too needy for sex, light won't let him have it. sometimes he won't even let him masturbate for periods of time, threatening death, so that mikami is always right under his thumb

misa and light are still dating on the outside. misa thinks it's exclusive, though she does sometimes question light about his relationship with L. light essentially gaslights her about this (Sad!). when light and misa have sex they never look into each other's eyes. either light fucks her doggystyle (sometimes anal if she's up for it), or misa reverse cowgirls on light. misa is a really loud moaner because she thinks light likes it. sometimes light doesn't even finish, and she probably thinks that he's having erectile dysfunction (he hates her) (I have nothing against misa I actually love her and I don't think she's dumb and I ship her with takada)

there's very few people Light lets dom him. sometimes L does, and Takada does every time. he doesn't have sex with Takada very often, but when he does, he finds himself begging her for more. his dick twitches, his lip trembles. he is extremely embarrassed afterward. they always do it in a hotel room, and Lights arms are tied with his own necktie. she teases him so bad. sometimes light calls her the devil to contrast his own image as god

Takada is the only person Light has sex with that L feels threatened by. light says he will kill her one day.

matsuda has seen Light and L having sex. he even heard L call Light kira. he doesn't know that Light is truly kira, and when they found out that he knew, they convinced him it was just a kink. matsuda has always been attracted to L and got really upset when he found out. he said he would tell the task force but ofc Light and L wouldn't let that happen. the day he saw them, they gave him a threesome to keep quiet. and L often seduces him at work to remind him to keep shut. blowjobs in the bathroom, a handjob under a desk, a knee to the crotch in the elevator, all that.

sometimes misa and rem make out or finger each other, usually when misa goes out, or spends time away from Light. she doesn't see it as cheating because rems a girl and because she's not human. as if light would care anyways.

bonus:

I hc L as gay but it would be really funny if he fucked that girl that thought he was hot at the tennis game. and then proceeded to ghost her. he felt bad for her mostly and wanted her to get good dick at least once in her life

[9800sblog]

Hii could you do a reading on hongjoong personality and relashionship with the members of ateez just like you did yeosang please?

Thanks in advance ✨️

Kim Hongjoong tarot reading

relationship with each ATEEZ member (from his perspective)

-> do I have his energy permission to do and share this reading? 3 of cups (and no to the personality question)

seonghwa

i think their relationship has been damaged by fan shipping. overall, they have really good conversations and they have a million reasons to be good friends, they have history and they work really well together, their dynamic is good in every area possible. he seems worried to interact on camera because people overly romanticize them, look into everything they do and disconnect it from reality, I think that causes logical distance between them. but of course they find ways to remain very good friends, they're a good duo, they make sense as coworkers and as pals.

yunho

they may have had a few fights recently because of contrasting opinions and hongjoong is trying to be understanding while still doing his job as a leader. it doesn't seem to be anything too serious that would end their relationship forever, they're just fighting and it seems funny. I think they're coming out of it tho, hongjoong is definitely trying but (idk about yunho bc the reading isn't about him) for now as they work almost everyday together, they're trying to remain tranquil, civil and appreciative of each other. in a grand scheme, they're like family and a really good duo at work too, that's what hongjoong thinks.

yeosang

hongjoong thinks yeosang is too complacent, there seems to be disagreements here too but mild. so their fight seems to be about money and possessions, he might be telling yeosang to invest more lately or else his work will be worth nothing. he may think yeosang is a little slow and doesn't realize he's trying to deepen their relationship 😥. hongjoong has fun with this guy, he thinks he's funny and charming, he's always entertained when hanging out with him. they're growing up, life is happening, the world changes everyday and yeosang stays the same, yet you never know what he's gonna do or say next, it's fun.

san

i think they drink a lot when they're together and they lie a lot, they may always talk about the crazy things they're gonna do when they hang out and it just never happens. they have a balanced and consistent connection, I think they spend a lot together, become immature and childish, it's good after stressful and busy days. they're very comfortable together, maybe too comfortable.

mingi

he really admires mingi, he's watching him grow into his own person and he's very proud, their relationship is more spiritual for some reason, they may have similar or the same beliefs. I think they confide in each other oftenly, they may understand themselves more easily than other members and it helps a lot for both of them, they seem to know each other's obscurities, they may open up when writing music together. for hongjoong, their relationship is one that is non material, full of psychological and personal growth. they may have had like a weird patch for a while, but they are definitely better now, I think they cry a lot together, this energy feels liberating in a soulful way.

wooyoung

hongjoong sees something in wooyoung that others don't, I think their dynamic is that of introspection, this is a more quiet friendship, they come to each other for guidance and they seem very equal. they may not have crazy fun together, they're more quiet conversations in a badly illuminated room. when they look at each other is like they're looking in a mirror, they take care of one another very well.

jongho

hongjoong is very fond of this guy, he's not much older but he feels very protective and happy when looking at him, it's like he's his baby brother. jongho is a very smart guy, compassionate and sweet, hongjoong feels very safe and emotional, specially when looking at him becoming his own man. I think hongjoong willingly gives more than takes in this dynamic, he really loves him like a brother, he feels responsible and he wants to help him grow into the best version of himself. it's like no matter what's happening, if he looks at jongho he feels happy ^^

sweet guys