#Do I have anger issues? Maybe

[be-t-s]

HEY! HEY YOU!

STAY SAFE!

EAT FOOD!

DRINK WATER!

LOOK AFTER YOUR FUCKING SELF!!!

BECAUSE THE WORLD IS SHIT AND YOU ARE AMAZING!!!!!!

I DONT TOLERATE LOSING ANGELS!!

YOU FELL ONCE, I WONT LET YOU FUCKING FALL AGAIN!

CAPEESH??

[mohntilyet]

Wait is the middle picture from those three sketches that one scene from the wigmaker job?

yes! it's this specific passage where lucanis is just seething with rage and trying to keep a lid on it, and illario's a stablising, comforting presence. BROTHERS!!!!! <3 though i chose to draw his hand on his shoulder rather than his arm i guess. artistic liberty!

[chappellrroan]

i know this matters to know but i've gotten better at shutting people out if i feel like they're purposely trying to instigate an argument with me

[lastofthe20thcenturygirls]

there's sang-woo and the kid he played with there's the twins from the orphanage there's og paik sa-eon and the fake one there's also the pretty boy secretary the main kidnapper and the homophobia guy feeling like i need to make a flowchart or something

[saihakkenden]

i have a hc that aren leans on something like a wall or desk or like slightly bows when he’s talking to shun to kinda get down to his level

[ghostinthegallery]

Re-reading Twice Dead King, the character I was most struck by on a second viewing was Mentep. Now there’s a tragic figure. Simultaneously a mentor, an ally, an antagonist, someone so terribly understandable who I want to smack upside the head for being a lying liar who lies.

Ultimately, Mentep is a penitent. He has committed terrible acts (that we only get scant details of) and he wants to redeem himself. Thanks to his tampering with his own memories, he doesn't fully know what he is repenting for, which puts him in a bind. However, he knows that he played a role in creating the flayer curse/longing sickness, so he goes to a planet where a high concentration of them have gathered and works on his cure. He's respected, he's able to do his work with only occasional interruptions from the local angsty youth. Things are good-ish (until the armada shows up.)

Mentep and Oltyx have a weird relationship. Despite being his normal asshole-teenager self, Oltyx does respect Mentep more than most. Trusts Mentep enough to let the guy perform experimental brain surgery on him. Twice. And Mentep is able to be much more candid with Oltyx in return. He's one of the few consistently calling Oltyx out for his bullshit. On the surface, it is a standard mentor relationship, but what got me on a second reading is that there is hardly a single conversation Mentep has with Oltyx where he isn’t lying to and/or manipulating him.

It starts early with Yenekh. Mentep knows Yenekh has been suffering from the curse, he hasn’t told Oltyx, and when he finally has to tell him, he conveniently does so right before distracting everyone with the “oh btw, we’re all gonna die to a giant human armada” news. This is done with the best of intentions. Mentep wants to protect Yenekh (and Oltyx, in his way), so he delivers the news this way to get the bad news out of the way and then both of them on the same side. But it is the start of a pattern.

Which we get again when Mentep fails to mention a that Antikef is a flayer den ruled by a “We have Illuminor Szeras at home” Vizier, and boy does that end badly for Oltyx (see the last 60% of Ruin). Naturally, Mentep has a good explanation:

But it is another lie, one that costs Oltyx dearly (put a pin in this, I am coming back to it.)

There's some little fibs and ommissions along the way as they go to Carnotite, but it all builds up to The Big Lie. The one that sends Oltyx spiraling and gets Mentep killed. Because you know what really helps with paranoia? Finding out your mentor and your best friend have been hiding a secret blood pit in your basement! Again, it makes sense why Mentep is lying about this! He has every reason to believe Oltyx would have rejected the flayed ones he and Yenekh were sheltering (he in fact does exactly this), and Mentep's entire goal is to cure the curse to atone for his role in its creation. However...

I think Oltyx is correct to call Mentep out here (Oltyx is wrong about most things, but not this). Somewhere a long the way he became a means to an end for Mentep. Mentep was focused on The Curse and not the person in front of him who was cursed. He used Oltyx's friendship with Yenekh, his need to save his kingdom, his trust, his fears, all in service of admirable goals, but he was using Oltyx. Is it any wonder this is where it ended?

The lies were Mentep's undoing from the start. Remember the lie about Antikef? The one that led to all the events of Ruin? Yes, Oltyx and Djoseras did talk and avoid a civil war, but Oltyx also went through hell. He saw his home turned into an abbattoir, his father reduced to barely more than an animal. Oltyx was literally vivisected and almost consumed by his own dysphoria. And then committed regicide after leaving his brother behind to die. Antikef is where Oltyx truly learned that compassion was weakness and saw how horrific the flayer curse could become. So how was he ever going to accept the flayed ones as Mentep wanted him to? Oltyx experienced the comically perfect combination of traumas to ensure that would never happen, thanks in part to Mentep's manipulations.

I cannot stress enough that Mentep's individual lies all made sense at the time. May have even been the best option, at the time. But the consequences piled up, and even as he is dying he still refuses to give Oltyx even a scrap of the truth. That is the core of his tragedy for me. Well, that and this:

He bases all of his manipulations on his understanding of people's psyche's, which are usually accurate, but it also traps them. It gives them no room to grow or surprise him or for outside factors to come in and intervene. Contrast this with Zultanekh, who is upfront to a fault. He gives Oltyx advice and resources, but what Oltyx does with those things is up to him. Even when he is screwing up royally, he's allowed to make those mistakes. Mentep causes ones of Oltyx's darkest hours (the secret blood pit), while Zultanekh lifts him out of another (the Blood Angel's attack). In the end, Zultanekh is the one who sees Oltyx's true growth and witnesses the birth of his kingdom. A birth that comes not from curing the curse but embracing it.

There was never a sickness to be fixed, which means Mentep never would have achieved his redemption because he was focused on the wrong things. Which does make his death and rebirth as Xott a bit of a reflection of Oltyx. He was too burdened in his first life, but in his second he (or at least a version of him) was able to witness the people he hurt reaching a place of peace.

[hurglewurm]

local idiot experiences an emotion (hundreds dead, thousands injured)

[tomurakii]

I'm still a kipperlily apologist actually. Why are we starting the episode talking about how she's been in counselling since freshman year. Maybe after 3 years you should've counselled her better tf

[moe-broey]

Meanwhile I've also been rapidly succumbing to madness over these two and have a deep need to start over White 2 again

[fluffypotatey]

70% of macaque becoming a bit insane after killing wukong would be because he would repeatedly insist he's not feeling a bit of grief. Repeatedly saying he's happy, great, wonderful! 0% sad or mournful. Never ever be able to move on because he is never moving away from denial.

the rivers of the Nile flourish and overflow with Macky’s denial. to the point of flooding. he is flooding the whole area and yet denies that his stoop into an even worse mental state is because of this

[deoidesign]

I'm sorry if what I say is wrong in any way, I don't mean to offend you, it's just something I'm not completely sure about. Does Adam use he/they or they/them pronouns? I think I saw a post of yours where you said that Adam uses he/they, but it was a while ago and now I'm not completely sure (and I don't want to use the wrong pronouns)

I know you don't mean anything by it, but I am sad that so many of the asks I get start with people saying "I'm sorry, I don't want to offend you" or some variation thereof, followed by completely normal questions. I think I may have been responding too harshly to too many things and given the impression that I'll jump at people for being wrong...

But asking clarifying questions is always okay. I mean, it's also okay to be wrong and even offensive. What matters is if you learn from it when someone points out that it was wrong or offensive. I won't stop telling people they're saying something hurtful if they are, but I don't want that to lead people to be scared of me or something.

Correcting people is always just about correcting them, not hurting them. It's okay to need to be corrected, were all learning new things every day.

Anyways Adam uses he/they, you remembered correctly

[anew-flame]

Been thinking about my angy Dalish baby. Need to start her run over (again) and make her nose bridge wider. For Elvhen Glory.

Bonus egg cracking violence under the cut. I need to get back to make them smooch!!

[darkdragon768]

Having a blorbo with anger issues made me think about my past.

I remember, when I was in elementary school, if I didn't like someone I showed that. Someone was celebrating their birthday and the teacher had us stand in line and everyone was supposed to say something nice. Well, except me. I said something like "I wish you an awful day". The teacher scolded me after that. I also made that girl cry due to this.

Another situation. We had a bully in class many didn't like. There was one day where he ended up on the floor and people were standing around him, kicking him and stuff. Now that I think about it, I don't think I joined in and kicked him too, I was just watching and thinking "heck yeah, that's what he deserves!". Some other day I had a fight with this guy tho.

I think that was at the beginning of school. There was a girl I couldn't stand. I remember a time where I pushed her and she accidentally hit her head against a... metal pipe?? and I didn't want to say sorry to her. However, I ended up being on good terms with her? We even became friends???

Then one time in kindergarten I found a cool rock on the ground, picked it up and then decided "actually it isn't that cool" and threw it behind my back accidentally hitting another kid on the head. And I swear this was by accident. This has nothing to do with being pissed but it's something I remember vividly.

I don't remember if my parents ever heard about any of those and scolded me. I know the teachers did tho.

Nowadays I still get pissed off of people but the difference is the actions stay inside my head.

[termagax]

re: "good girl" i think they say it once randomly as a joke and its just one of those things that gets him wayyy more than they expected it would. so now its their secret weapon and they use it very sparingly and every single time he gets super embarrassed about it but it works ill tell you what.

[hecatepaint]

When you don't know if your anger issues are bc humans just naturally aggravate you or if you have mental issues so you just blame the periods

[france-unofficial]

either I'm getting angrier or the world is getting stupider (its probably both)