#Dipper and Mabel's parents

[collector-noceda-clawthorne]

After reading TBOB. I'd like to share a list of gravity falls Headcanons I want to share.

Most notably this

[chiropter36]

So, I 100% subscribe to the headcanon that the baby in "A Tale of Two Stans" is Dipper and Mabel's father, not their grandpa Shermie (who is Stan and Ford's older brother, who was already an adult and off doing his own thing at the time of the episode, hence why Stan never brought him up), just due to how the timeline doesn't really work otherwise.

That being said, however, I've done some thinking after the recent interview with Alex Hirsch where he confirmed that the baby was in fact intended to be Shermie and they just hadn't thought about the timeline and never had an opportunity in-show to explain the discrepancy after it was brought to their attention. And to honor the original intention, I've decided that yes, the baby was Sherman Pines.

Sherman Pines Junior, that is.

It fits right in with my headcanon that Shermie, like his father, is a "not too creative" individual, including when it came to naming his kid. Frankly, he was hoping the boy's mother would handle that - he would have been happy with whatever she chose - but she insisted that he have the "privilege" of choosing his new son's name. So he floundered for a moment before basically shrugging and saying "uh... Sherman Jr., I guess," and that was that.

Little Shermie Jr. never liked the name - or rather, he didn't like being a Junior. It just always made it feel like his dad's name, not his; and on top of that the whole thing just felt kinda stuffy and old-fashioned to him. So early on in elementary school, he started going by his middle name, and liked that a lot more... but it wasn't until he was in college, when his then-girlfriend suggested that he just legally change it if he didn't like it, that it occurred to him that he could do that. He held off for a bit after this revelation, worrying that his father might be hurt or offended that he didn't want to share his name... but when he finally worked up the courage to float the hypothetical possibility by Shermie, the man just shrugged agreeably, explaining that he had never really had any investment in his progeny sharing his name and if he wants to change it it's his own business.

So the young man swapped his first and middle names, and by the time he got married (to the aforementioned girlfriend, Audrey) was officially Cooper Sherman Pines.

(I've never actually seen any of Twin Peaks, but I know it was a strong influence on Gravity Falls, and I didn't want the Pines parents' names to just be random, so I did a little wiki searching and I think these work well)

(Also, Audrey Pines' maiden name is Star. Mabel always loved that, and it influenced a certain one of her sweaters.)

[when-gravity-has-fallen]

Background details/me blabbing about my askblog yaaay!! Mostly because it's difficult for me to get motivated as it is! Plus maybe after being inactive for 2 years (rip 💀) this will help pique interest? Idk I just wanna talk about my sillies tbh. And the Axolotl needs a break you know? My guy's watching over an entire multiverse.

First off. The post about my LGBTQIA+ headcanons here: https://www.tumblr.com/craycray-wolf/737090570384703488/while-in-wait-for-the-book-of-bill-already-hard?source=share

It's still accurate to how I feel about the characters...mostly. In the time since I made this post, I have since been converted to "Grunkle Stan is bi" and I'm now preaching the Good Word 🤟

Anyway with that now amended, here's some stuff!

I originally made the majority of the posts about where everyone is now back in 2022, when I intended to have the blog launched as part of the 10th anniversary of Gravity Falls airing.

Well clearly that didn't pan (🩷💛💙🍳) out but maybe it was so it could instead coincide with all the revelations from TBoB! Life is kinda a beautiful thing sometimes.

Anyway point being, I'll have to tweak the timeline a bit. Which is fine because I wanted Dippin Dots and Mabes to hold some jobs before college anyway so really my lack of updating is just an excuse for this. That's the major point I could think of but if I didn't properly consider others please sound off 📣 (yes I'm a cringe emoji user AND I'M PROUD)

Soos and Melody are still attempting to conceive because they want at least one bio child if they can but they're working on adoption.

Many assume Gus Burnside to be missing or worse dead. But maybe... he's still out there somewhere...with his physical body fulfilling a deal. But y'know! No one can say for certain!

To be completely honest I'm still figuring out my interpretation of Bill's backstory. Sorry about that.

Though the reason the Axolotl has contacted our dimension to begin with has to do with his concern...about a certain someone. And who better to give a helping hand than the fandom and the Zodiac?

Since Stan taught Wendy how to hot wire vehicles and whatnot, they one day found a fairly intact Harley motorcycle in the dump. They fix it up together and Stan declares it hers. This is where her Harley previously mentioned in other posts comes from.

When did this happen? I've always assumed the Stans come back to land from time to time, including some summers. So likely during summer but a holiday could work too!

Mabel loves being a passenger. Dipper not so much unless he clings tight. Wendy installs a seat back at some point and this helps ease his anxiety. A little. He likes seeing the scenery though so he'll bare through it if asked to ride. Not to mention he cares for Wendy and thus doesn't want to deny her sharing her joy.

Robbie probably figured out he wanted to be an anime artist while doodling in college classes he wasn't paying attention to. Either he was in generals or some other degree at this point. He only drew in private during high school.

THIS NEXT SECTION WILL BE SHIPS 🚨 YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

Pacifica during her high school/diner years thought she like liked Dipper. And well, she was Dipper's rebound crush so at around 15 or so they dated for a while. Pacifica however eventually realizes she's actually a lesbian and was misinterpreting her care for Dippin Dots, as well as thinking she only had so many options initially. Dipper realizes it was to cope with Wendy.

Therefore they cut off romantic ties on good terms and continue to be good friends.

(I have nothing against Dipcifica, it's cute. I'm just personally a Mabcifica person and enjoy my lesbian Pacifica hc)

In their early college years Mabel and Pacifica become girlfriends, LET'S GOOOOOO

Candy and Dipper have began to catch each other's eyes... they've healed from the events of Roadside Attraction in the years since and now they can have a healthier relationship in several ways. I WILL DIE FOR THIS SHIP OKAY

Fiddleford and Ford are sweet old man boyfriends. Though romance baffles Ford it makes enough sense with Fiddleford.

Stan is Stan. Though maybe all of his family coming out awakes something in him... something new to explore about himself...

Past Billford will likely be discussed at some point, though they haven't been a thing for decades and it was toxic to begin with.

Grenda and Marius are of course married ❤️ Candy, Mabel, and Pacifica were her bridesmaids. Mabel and Candy were piling over each other trying to get the bouquet, though Wendy catches it. Uninterested in marriage she throws it back out and reflexively Dipper catches it. After confused for a solid moment he tosses it and finally Pacifica then catches it.

_________

SHIP SECTION FINISHED ⚠️

The Pines Twins revisit Gravity Falls every summer until their high school graduation. Well *maybe* they go one more after graduation but then they have job schedules to contend with.

One of those summers (probably when the Mystery Twins are 15) their parents surprise them with a visit! But then they start to question everything because y'know. Weird town.

Eventually the truth comes out about everything, and they better understand their kids.

It wasn't the easiest summer but an important one.

They let their children return because they know how dearly they love their time there, albeit with ground rules established.

As for their jobs, Mabel was a barista and Dipper restocked shelves at a grocery store.

Dipper now has come to care for his birth name and birthmark. He still likes going by Dipper but he insists that only those close with him use the name. The only reason he still wears bangs is that his hairstyle is just comfortable and familiar. This also keeps his birthmark special as only some get to see it (in full).

Mabel still loves knitting and sweaters, but she's experimented a lot with fashion throughout the years. She now has more variety in her wardrobe than sweaters and skirts.

The twins live in dorms with a couple roommates and return back to their childhood home during holidays and summer. They intend to live in Gravity Falls once they get all their education/credentials.

Waddles is an old man but still kickin'. The parents were initially upset with his presence but were convinced by Stan to begrudgingly keep him. They grew to care for the piggy as well.

The family cat (Sniffles) has since passed :(

They have a dog (Honey) now though! She was a puppy from a dog Dipper once dogsat. The owners didn't realize said dog was preggo. It was a whole thing. Anyway Mabel loves putting her in cute outfits that match Waddles, something she used to do with Sniffles.

Mabel is a k-pop multistan (originating from Candy and Grenda introducing it to her) and absolutely loves drinking boba/jelly milk tea. Dipper likes the sound of k-pop music but isn't a fan the same way his sister is. He likes milk tea but the boba pearls themselves freak him the heck out.

There's a lot more but I'm blanking 🤪

[presidentstalkeyes]

Okay, I gotta know something. It's been a hot second since I posted that poll about Dipper and Mabel's parents in the Book of Bill, and the overwhelming majority of those who answered the poll think they're getting divorced.

But why is that? To me it just seems like they had an argument (if we can even trust Bill to be telling the full truth here, which like... it's Bill :V). Yet the overwhelming consensus is 'divorce'. Is there something I'm missing? I'm genuinely curious.

[fragilefirstchance]

It's Either Tourist Traps or Drugs

Gen, family-centric, rated T or M depending on installment

Do you like longfics? Gen fics? Reflective, OC-centric examinations of family dynamics? Maybe you'd like my fic!

Hi! I am not generally speaking active on Tumblr, but I just completed Part 5 of a fanfiction that is almost 150k words and which shows no signs of slowing down soon. I figured I'd show it to class. :)

Fragile First Chance and its follow-ups is a story about a nineteen-year-old boy whose legal name is Joss William [redacted] Pines but if you call him anything except Will you might end up in a fistfight. It's also a story about how the Pineses are basically good people with a lot of baggage.

Major themes are tagged and optional content warnings for individual chapters are included in drop-down tabs in the notes. For the most part, heavier themes are not gratuitous.

Below the cut you'll find a rough outline of each section. If you don't want spoilers, though, just head on over.

This story was well under way before The Book of Bill came out. It isn't perfectly TBoB compliant, but the themes and plot aren't really something that makes that an issue.

Part 1: Fragile First Chance

Dipper and Mabel Pines were sent to Gravity Falls at the beginning of summer for, from their perspective, no reason. In reality, it was because they were being sheltered from some very old family drama.

Will is May's son from her first marriage and Fil's son by adoption. He's nineteen years old, just getting out of his second incarceration, and a recovering addict. They planned to put him up for a few months, and after that Fil's weird black-sheep uncle agreed to give him a shot in Oregon.

Ford, of course, knew nothing about this. He's not happy about it.

Part 2: Learning to Breathe

Will and Ford are slowly acclimating to each other like two feral cats. They don't really have anything in common except insomnia and a mutual desperate quest not to get in too many fights.

Will doesn't like Gravity Falls. It's lonely, there's nothing to do, and it's full of weird bullshit he doesn't want to deal with. He's coping, though - Soos is pretty cool, the local teens are entertaining, and he ends up getting a long really well with the local bait shop guy and his dad.

Part 3: When Family Matters

Will has started to figure out how Ford works and make an effort to be nice to him. He also tentatively almost likes the guy. (cue Stan audibly sighing in relief off-screen.)

Also: Dipper and Mabel have figured out that their long-lost brother has reappeared, and there are certain family traditions about how you deal with long-lost brothers.

Part 4: Lancing the Wound

Ford and Will are both under a phenomenal amount of stress for a wide variety of reasons. By this point in the story, words like "panic attack" and "therapy" are coming up more often. They have more in common than they ever realized, although for two people with severe abuse-related PTSD, that's not necessarily a good thing.

The McGuckets are around to help. The Twins are too, although whether that's a good thing is open to debate.

Part 5: Nature versus Nurture

In the wake of Part 4, Stanford Pines is coming to realize that his mental health is a much more serious problem than he had previously realized. He struggles to come to terms with this and decide what to do next. This segment of the story is primarily about self-reflection and realizing that you need to change. We also get some serious discussions about the mental health industry (and how it tied into the gay scene in the 70s) by people who are personally invested in it.

Part 6: Definition of a Real Pines

This story arc just started and concerns Ford navigating his life as he tries to re-integrate with his family and society while working through a very difficult mental health situation.

We'll get to meet more of the Pines family. Shermie lives in Florida with his sister-in-law. (Note for those curious about the timeline incongruities: Shermie's age is- wait, look over there! *smokebomb, jumps out the window*)

Bonus: Erastus Kankerson's Toxic Ex

This is a stand-alone one-shot about Erastus Kankerson, an old friend of Fiddleford McGucket who dated him for a while after the divorce.

[murmaiderii]

What do y'all headcanon as Dipper and Mabel's parents' names? I'm writing something and it's getting a little unbelievable to not refer to them by name.

[mymanyfandomramblings]

Hi! I don't remember if anyone, including me, asked this, but do you have any headcanon about Dipper and Mabel's parents? And also Shermie?

Nobody's actually asked me about this yet, but I'm happy to talk about my headcanons.

Shermie is seven years older than the twins, and was essentially a third parent to them growing up (there is a fanfic about him coming eventually). Shermie was also Caryn's favourite son, although she tried not to be obvious about it. He also fought in the Vietnam war. Shermie moved to California shortly after Stan's 'death', when his eldest, David (Dipper and Mabel's father) was fourteen and his twin daughters were ten. David went on to study archaeology and eventually married Laura Adamson, and several years later, Dipper and Mabel were born.

My headcanons when it came to deciding David and Laura's personalities were to make it very obvious where Dipper and Mabel's personalities came from. David really loves archaelogy, and Dipper and Mabel both inherited the trait of intense obsessiveness from their father. David is also more introverted, preferring his own company or just the company of the people he loves, whereas Laura is an extreme extrovert (and yes, their great romance started with her extrovert-adopting this dorky introvert). Laura is a paramedic, and although this is a challenging job, she's not someone who can just sit around while bad things happen, as she's definitely a very protective, 'doing' person, and is the one who Dipper inherited the protective trait from.

The parents don't have favourites among their children, as Dipper and Mabel gravitate to different parents for different things. Mabel tends to confide things in her mother, whereas her father is the one she goes to talk about her random thoughts (as they are both quirky conversationists). Dipper meanwhile talks to his father about their shared interests (they both like sci-fi and fantasy), whereas he appreciates the fact that his mother is slightly less weird than the rest of the family (i.e. she will also roll her eyes at Mabel's antics occasionally). The Pines family is a very weird and very loving family.

[darkspine10]

GF Fanfic - Dipper and Mabel Vs. The Past

Dipper and Mabel Vs. The Past (6562 words) by darkspine10

Chapters: 1/9 Fandom: Gravity Falls Rating: Teen and Up

Summary: When he was 13 years old, Dipper Pines chose to hide the truth of his incredible summer adventures from his parents. Now a parent himself, he returns with his family and sister to finally face the consequences. However, none of them expect the secret to come out in quite such a magical way.

With time running out and chaotic creatures rampaging through the city, Dipper must navigate both this crisis and the fallout from his parents' discoveries, or risk losing them forever...

Chapter 1 - Frosty Reunion

Dipper Pines had a problem.

Dipper Pines had to tell a lie.

Exhausted from the bus ride, he and Mabel had been picked up at the station by their parents. Neither his mom or dad was excited by the prospect of Mabel’s new pig companion, but weren’t able to muster any defence against her persistence. It wasn’t the first time her tenacity had worn down her parents and would be far from the last.

No, Waddles wasn’t the problem. The real problem was the letter, and not the one from Dipper’s friends promising him they’d ‘see him next summer’. If he wanted any chance of that promise being fulfilled then the next few minutes would be vital.

A few weeks ago, back before the world ended, before Weirdmageddon, before all of Bill’s plans and tricks, when the twins were still reeling from the arrival of Grunkle Ford, Mabel had penned a short letter home. It detailed Ford’s arrival and general existence, something the twins’ parents had been completely in the dark about. They’d been shocked when the letter arrived - finding out a trusted family member had been lying for 30 years would disturb anyone - but what was more concerning were all the other details. A hitherto unknown twin brother was one thing, but Mabel had decided to include much more in her letter.

The letter rested on the kitchen table, with a cutesy crayon illustration of Stan and Ford holding hands and all, while Mom and Dad sat the twins down to ask the obvious questions. “Portals? Reversed gravity?” their father asked. Mom had a concerned frown, as if trying to piece together what all this meant. She’d laid out photos Mabel had provided from one of her scrapbooks - corroborating evidence for Ford’s existence. There were shots of him with Stan and kids, reclining in the Mystery Shack’s sitting room or trekking through woodland paths.

Dipper sat in silence, contemplating where he could possibly begin to explain anything about the summer. All his parents really knew was that they’d worked at the Mystery Shack with Stan, had nearly been sent home at one point before ending up staying, and then a random brother appeared out of nowhere. It wasn’t like he could show his parents the journals; even if he had them here in Piedmont and not lost down a pit it was a lot to take in. He and Mabel had been on so many adventures in the past three months, adventures which had their fair share of risk and peril. The twins had each nearly died several times over. What would Mom and Dad say if they found out?

Mabel seemed ignorant of these concerns, gladly rambling about unicorns and mermaids and all sorts of out-of-context snippets. She’d never had to explain the strange events in Gravity Falls to any newcomers before, so the information flooded out of her in random anecdotes. “Then I made my hand super big with the shrink ray and socked him right in his eyeball!”

“Uh huh,” Dad muttered. Dipper knew he was unconvinced from the deep lines on his forehead. Mabel’s imagination was famously unmatched after all. But if his parents began to suspect, even for a second, that there was some truth to her wild claims then things might get tricky to explain. “I knew Uncle Stanford was a bit of a conman, but this-”

“Stanley,” Dipper said automatically, his first comment since being confronted with the letter. “Stanford is the, uh… new one.”

“Right… So Uncle Stan kept all this hidden from the family?”

Here Dipper felt on stable ground. The motivations that had split Stan and Ford apart were mundane enough for Mom and Dad to grapple with. He gladly recounted an abridged retelling of their childhood and falling out, opting to skim over the portal in favour of simple estrangement. That seemed to satisfy his father, who knew Stan personally from visiting him in his own childhood and occasional contact over the years since.

Mom however wanted more. Wanted to know why Mabel’s account included such oddities. She was about to answer, to give even more away about magic and the supernatural. Dipper finally made a choice and stepped in before she could speak. “Those were great games we had with the Grunkles, weren’t they, Mabel?”

“Uh, what are you talking about Dip-Dop, I was about to tell Mom all about when we time-travelled-”

He elbowed her in the side and fixed her with a stern gaze. Mabel pursed her lips, momentarily unsure, before giving a tiny nod. “Lots of crazy adventures, right sis, so much fun and games.”

“Uh, yeah. It was really… great,” Mabel said with a hint of doubt. Then the twins flashed a synchronised smile at their parents, made an excuse about unpacking, and ran off to their rooms.

After that day the matter of Mabel’s letter was swiftly forgotten, treated as nothing more than a flight of fancy from a girl known for her outlandish creativity, learning to cope with the upheaval of a sudden new relative. The twins seemed to have enjoyed their summer away and held nothing back when telling their parents all about exploring the forests or the new friends they’d made up north like Wendy and Soos. It didn’t need to go beyond that.

Dipper and Mabel both agreed this was for the best. Mr and Mrs Pines would live in blissful ignorance as long as it meant they could continue to visit the Falls every summer and investigate the paranormal in secret. They had no way of knowing how their parents would react to the information, so they weren’t going to risk finding out. All they had to do was keep the charade going, and lie to their parents every single day. Easy, Dipper thought. We’re the Mystery Twins. We can do anything.

Dipper Pines had a problem.

Dipper Pines wanted to tell the truth.

Turning the last corner through the darkened suburbs, Dipper slowed the car to a stop. He clutched the steering wheel and stared straight ahead at the perfectly ordinary house. A string of lights alternating in red and green illuminated the street. The glow was hypnotic.

“Dad? You ok?”

His clammy hands squeezed the wheel tighter before he let out a breath and eased them off. Turning to look at the other passengers squeezed into the back, straining the seating capacities of the Mini Cooper, he looked to his daughter waiting expectantly for him to answer.

“I’m… fine, Merrise. Just… taking a moment to process where we are.”

Sitting beside him in the front, Pacifica offered a sympathetic smile. “We made it, Mace. Like you planned. Home.”

715 Wildwood Avenue, Piedmont, California. The home of his and Mabel’s parents.

Dipper switched off the 80’s pop CD that had been blaring. His sister had insisted on having it play for most of the drive, to make it feel more like a family road trip. No one had been singing along for the last half an hour. Mabel had been reverently whispering as she pointed out familiar places from her childhood to her wife and niece - though in the darkness they weren’t able to make much out except indistinct blurs. They were all tightly packed together beside Wendy, Dipper and Pacifica’s baby daughter. Both Mabel and her partner, Zera, seemed eager to be free of the cramped space. They unbuckled their seatbelts as Dipper took a deep breath and addressed the group.

“Now I know we all want to get inside. 10 hours on the road is nobody’s idea of fun. But before we go in I want to set a few ground rules.”

“Uh oh,” Mabel groaned, “it’s the Dad Voice.”

"First: Perception filters are to be turned on at all times. I want no magic use under my parents’ roof, and no mention of the supernatural whatsoever. Am I understood?”

Silence filled the car. Mabel and Pacifica shared a glance. They recognised Dipper’s strict tone; he was in ‘adventure lecture mode’. Pacifica lightly touched his arm. “Mason, remember, this isn’t a dangerous scenario. We’re just staying with your parents for a few days.”

“Anyway,” Mabel said, climbing forwards and butting in between the couple. “I thought this meet-up was supposed to be ‘the one’.” Her eyes flicked towards the waiting house. “You know, all about finally telling Mom and Dad the truth about all our adventures?”

Dipper swallowed and puffed out his chest. “It will be, it will. But first we’ll take it slow. I haven’t visited Mom and Dad in nearly six years. It’s gonna take some time to settle back into routine. I want to introduce Merrise and Zera first in a normal context, then we can branch out to the…” He swallowed. “...Alien stuff. We don’t want to bombard them with everything right up front.”

“Do we really have to go through all this?” Zera asked. Her arms were folded and she scowled from the backseat.

Dipper scanned her appearance; she was covered in aqua scales, with a vibrant purple fin jutting out of her head. “I think we do.” he replied dryly. “Most humans aren’t used to amphibious offworlders from the planet S’aren!”

Merrise wiggled free of her seatbelt and pushed forwards. “But you always say that I should be happy with who I am. No-one else gets to judge me for that.” Her dark eyes pleaded with him to explain fully.

“That’s true, of course it is.” Dipper felt his voice rising, wanting the others to understand his point of view. He’d been working on this plan for the past month, building slowly to the point where he felt comfortable finally revealing the truth to his parents. “Look, I just want my parents to know you as people, without any prejudice. That means that certain parts of our lives have to be… understated. At least at first. After a few days we can work up to the big reveal.” He smiled shakily, failing to convince the sour faces in the rest of the car.

“Then what’s this for?” Pacifica clicked the glove box open and removed a leather-bound journal with a golden hand sigil adorning the cover. A number 3 was written on it in black ink. She flipped the book open to a random page showing a hovering ghost and held it for all to see. “This isn’t your usual late-night reading, is it hon?”

Dipper grabbed the book off her and slammed it closed against his chest. “That’s… backup.”

“For what?” Pacifica responded, her lip set in a line. “I saw the others you packed in the trunk. Every single one of the journals, yours and your Great Uncle’s.” She frowned. “They took up a lot of space, you realise. I could’ve packed a bigger wardrobe, but no, Mace has to bring his book collection.”

Dipper awkwardly laughed but Pacifica’s gaze didn’t waver. “Paz, don’t worry. I’m not planning on summoning a demon or something like that.”

“Yeah, we all figured that, bro,” Mabel said, slumped in her seat.

“When we get around to finally spilling everything then these books will be crucial. Mom and Dad can take all the time they need to learn about our lives. The lives we chose to live without them.” That got the others to listen at last. No-one could meet his gaze. It hadn’t been Dipper’s choice alone to conceal things. Mabel had been right alongside him all the way, as had Pacifica from the moment she’d been introduced to her future parents-in-law. She had her own journal stashed in the trunk, pink with a golden llama on the cover.

Dipper slid Journal 3 into his jacket. “Though we’ve gotta make sure Mom and Dad don’t read them ahead of schedule. As far as they’re concerned these are just notebooks. But if they start browsing through they might find out about the times we went out monster hunting as teens, or our death defying first summer, or the fact their granddaughter is from outer space!”

Pacifica sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose. “As I always tire of saying, you don’t need a multi-step plan for social interaction.”

“Forgive me for being cautious,” he replied icily. “So much of our lives is wrapped up in this stuff. Where Zera and Merrise come from. How Ford came back. What we were doing racing around the world for a whole year, and then why we dropped off the face of it for months after that. I don’t want to come off ranting like a loony street preacher when I try to explain the basic facts of how Wendy was born: Hear all about it, alien nano machines fixed my wife’s barren womb! - and that’s a totally true description of events by the way, according to Paz.”

Mabel sneered at him. “Yeesh bro, lighten up. You’re leaping straight to the worst possible outcome. Mom and Dad aren’t going to take it that badly. I thought you wanted to talk to them,” she whispered.

“I do. But I want to do it on my own terms. Can you guys do that for me?”

Pacifica took his hand in hers. “Like Mabel said, this was your idea. So if you want to take it slow… then I guess we’ll take it slow.” She reached over and kissed him. “Now let’s go inside. It’s been getting muggy in here for the past hour and a half, ever since we passed Sacramento.”

She made to open her door but Dipper spoke. “One last thing. Zera, Merrise. Can you please turn on your perception filters?”

“Will Grandma and Grandpa really hate us that much?” Merrise asked, and Dipper already felt his heart breaking. He forced out a grimace.

“No, but… look, Mom is very high strung most of the time, and Dad, he’s super down to Earth. I don’t know how they’d react, so it’s better to play this safe. So please, can we do this my way?”

Merrise reached into her backpack by her feet and retrieved a golden medallion which she slid over her head. “Alright Dad. If you say so.” The moment the medallion was around her neck, Merrise’s features began to morph before Dipper’s eyes. Her magenta skin rapidly darkened. Her new skin tone was distinct from Pacifica and the twins but still mundane enough to pass as human. Her eyes, black pupilless pits, gained sclera and shrunk.

In the back, Zera attached a triangular earring and her features similarly morphed. Her headfin became short black hair and her scaly skin took on a brown complexion. Once the effect was complete, the two appeared completely human. A second later Dipper’s eyes blurred until the pair looked as if nothing had changed, as alien as always. This was the trick of the filter, showing a disguise to anyone unaware of Zera or Merrise’s true nature but undetectable to someone familiar with their real forms. Dipper squinted and the pair switched back and forth between alien and human before settling as the latter. He’d been training his senses to try and visualise both appearances, should a mention of their altered forms come up in conversation.

“Thanks,” he said softly to the two of them. Pacifica had already stepped out and round to unbuckle Wendy from her booster seat in the back. Merrise, swathed in an overlarge jacket and wearing Dipper’s old fur hat, was prepared for the icy blast when she opened the door. On the opposite side Mabel pulled on a bobble hat and gloves before practically tumbling out onto the sidewalk.

Dipper followed her round to the trunk and checked over their crammed-in belongings before returning Journal 3 to its crate with the other volumes. He found his latest book, number 9, decorated with a golden constellation pattern. All three of Ford’s books were safely stowed - plus one with a green cover and a golden symbol melding the six-fingered hand and the circular sigil from Stan’s fez. This came from later in life, and Ford had shared it with his brother Stan when they’d sailed around the world’s oceans exploring hotspots of mystery. With six of Dipper’s own books going back to 2012, and Pacifica’s lone journal, there were eleven journals in total, brimming with forbidden knowledge. He lifted the crate down onto the asphalt and clipped the lid on tight. While the others might not see the value in bringing these to Piedmont, Dipper considered them his secret weapon, his best chance at laying out both the course of his life and the reasons why he’d kept it so obscured until now. If he couldn’t sway his parents with his words, then maybe these writings could provide something of an unbiased history.

The others were gathered around the trunk now, dumping out their bags ready to carry them inside. Mabel was struggling to heft a plastic carrier cage that had been buried amongst the clutter. “C’mon girl, time to stretch your scales.” A tongue darted in and out of the bars.

“It’s not fair,” Merrise said, turning imploringly to her father. “Mabel got to bring her pet! Why couldn’t we bring Dee? He’ll be all lonely at home.”

Dipper put an arm around Merrise as Mabel opened the cage and stroked her pet snake, Apep. “Sorry Sixer, but after all that’s happened, in the Falls and in Salem, I’m not taking any chances with Dee. I’d like to keep the home I grew up in un-flambéed.”

“Apep’s way less dangerous,” Mabel added, despite the fact that the snake could deliver a venomous bite if provoked. “We’ll have to invest in fire-proof cladding next Christmas. You ready, Z?” Zera fumbled with a bag and stood up rigid. Mabel could already guess the reason for her loss of composure, and Zera was quick to spill the beans.

“May, are you sure your parents will be ok with us? If they know so little about your life then how will they react to you showing up with a new wife?”

Mabel put an arm around her. “It’ll be fine. I already sent Mom and Dad a bunch of emails and texts telling them all about you. Well, everything except for…” She pointed skywards and winked. Zera’s apprehension faded away and she patted Mabel on the arm. “My parents aren’t evil, just ignorant about a few, small things.”

“Hey, that reminds me.” Pacifica finished pulling out a suitcase and turned on Mabel. “If we’re doing ground rules then I have one for you. I don’t want you spouting politics all week, Mabel. This is a holiday, not an opportunity for polemics about the evils of commercialism”

“Who, me?” She dumbly replied.

“Not to sound like a wanted poster, but you’re not exactly subtle when it comes to your beliefs.”

“What, you think renowned slash infamous anarchist activist May Pines can’t keep quiet about her opinions for a few days? Perish the thought?” When Pacifica was unmoved by her dramatic words Mabel chuckled. “Ah, relax sister, I’m only pulling your leg. I love this season, all the sparkly lights, the silly traditions, sharing gifts. You never had that growing up, did you?”

“I did not. Holidays don’t add much when you’re a millionaire. Anyway, we’re wasting time out here, let’s get inside. Mason, you first?”

Dipper was surprised. He hadn’t expected to be put on the spot. He supposed it made sense; it was his plan that had brought them here after all. Hefting the journal crate he walked up the path to the door of the Pines household. Colourful decorations of reindeers lined the way.

It had been Christmas the last time he’d visited too. He and Pacifica had dropped in over New Years 2024 - explicitly avoiding Mabel who’d been present the week before. That had been back in the awful period when the twins weren’t on speaking terms, a situation mercifully reversed in the present. Dipper hoped desperately that the same could soon be said about the distant relationship with his parents.

Wrapped up in his thoughts, he didn’t realise he’d already reached the front door. He turned and saw the others all tapping their feet, waiting for him to make a move. Pacifica in particular was almost daring him to do it, to get over his anxiety. She had Wendy wrapped in her arms while Merrise clung to her hand; his daughters who’d never met their grandparents before today. He would do this for them most of all.

He placed the crate of books down and faced the door. He attempted to project confidence. This was perfectly normal. They were his parents and he was 30 years old for chrissakes, he didn’t have to worry this much. He’d faced the end of the world half a dozen times and come through stronger. He hadn’t even been this stressed on his wedding day. Marrying Pacifica was trivial compared to blowing his biggest secret, one that had defined his entire teen years, wide open. Even deciding between ringing the doorbell or knocking was a momentous dilemma. In the end he opted to knock, wanting the solid reality of the door to tether him in the present.

A few awkward seconds passed and Dipper looked back at the expectant faces of his family while he tried to stay composed. The door was pulled inwards and, staring out from beneath bushy eyebrows, Dipper’s father stood there grinning. “Dipper!”

“Hi Dad-” He was pulled into a tight embrace, reminding him where Mabel had picked up her penchant for bone–crushing hugs. He squeezed back, finding that he’d missed the feeling of such a warm closeness with his father. Released after a few seconds, he saw his mother rushing down the hallway.

“Sorry, the meatloaf’s just gone in the oven.” She lightly hugged Dipper and beamed at him.

“Don’t worry about the cooking, Mom.” Dipper said, placing a hand on each of his parents’ shoulders. “It’s great to see both of you. It’s been way too long.”

“Same to you son,” Mr Pines said. “Although, that hair?”

Dipper picked up a strand of his messy brown hair, which had recently passed the point of being a mullet and often needed tying up in a ponytail. “It fits my personality,” he said casually, almost proud of his more rugged appearance, developed in response to his adventurous lifestyle living in Gravity Falls for the past few months. He flexed a muscle jokingly to show off some of his newly developed strength. “I’m the kind of guy who can cut down a tree and pose dramatically next to it,” he said semi-seriously.

Pacifica strode in the door behind him, trailing a suitcase which she propped up by the stairs. Carrying Wendy in one arm, she handed the case over to husband and flashed a winning smile at the Pines. “Such a pleasure to see you both,” she said to Dipper’s parents with a layer of sophisticated charm he was sure only she could display. “Mary, do you need help in the kitchen?”

“Oh, well-”

“It’s no bother, I’ve already pre-made some things for Christmas dinner. I’ll take a load off your shoulders and let you have a moment with everyone.” She winked at Dipper then sashayed down the hall.

Dipper adjusted the baby in his arms, making sure Wendy was comfortable, then grimaced at his parents. “I promise she’s gotten better at cooking since last you saw her.”

“That’ll be impressive,” Mr Pines grumbled cheerily before grinning down at Dipper’s daughter. “Isn’t she a cutie.”

“Oh yeah,” Dipper said absent-mindedly. “This is Wendy.” He handed her over gently and watched his parents dote on their infant grandaughter. Their eyes lit up with love for the innocent little girl.

“Move it or lose it, bro!” Mabel shoved Dipper out of the way and into the house, carrying Apep around her neck as was usual for her but placed her snake terrifyingly close for most people. She gave a nonchalant wave then breezed straight past her parents into the adjacent sitting room. Sitting in the corner of the room was a massive pink lump of flesh which snorted at Mabel’s presence. “Waddles, my baby!”

“Of course she goes straight for the pig,” her mother chuckled.

“We know who she really cares about around here,” Dad added. Waddles, now in his 18th year, was enjoying his twilight years in peace as a sedentary pig. Of the group, Mabel had visited her parents most frequently in the last few years, making regular trips to Piemont when her activist events allowed.

“Oh yeah,” Mabel added, slapping her forehead. “Mom, Dad, this is my wife Zera!” She said it with the casual tone of introducing a new friend she’d made in the park five minutes prior.

Zera timidly smiled and entered, appearing more nervous than Dipper had ever known from the brash alien. “Hello, Mr and Mrs Pines. I, uh, hope I’m welcome.” For a split second the perception filter flickered under Dipper’s watchful gaze. Zera’s desi features vanished to show a mosaic of shimmering scales. His chest tightened, but then she returned to looking human, with his parents not giving any indication of surprise. Zera’s disguise had only wavered under his own scrutiny.

“Of course dear, come in out of the cold,” Mrs Pines said. “Mabel’s been so cagey telling us about you up until now,” she said enthusiastically, though Dipper noticed a slight narrowing of her brow. Even after all this time Mabel’s reputation for frequent romances was still something his mother was legitimately judgy about. Mr Pines on the other hand slapped her on the back and congratulated her about the wedding, saying something about finally tying his daughter down.

Zera chatted amiably for a few moments, before going to kneel beside Mabel and her pets. Apep and Waddles were snuggled close together, sleeping in the glow of a nearby Christmas tree while the couple watched on. Wendy yawned in her grandmother’s arms and Dipper took her back. “Poor little lamb’s as tuckered out as I am.” He gave a little laugh, finally starting to feel at ease.

Maybe this all wouldn’t be so bad. If Pacifica could breeze in like a socialite and Mabel still had the ability to treat everything like a harmless game, then maybe he could relax about the heavy stuff too.

“And who’s this?” his mother said. Dipper spun around. Standing out in the cold, clutching her hands together, Merrise was still lingering on the porch. She had an apprehensive expression and seemed wary about entering into the glow that covered the front porch.

“Come on Merrise, it’s ok.” Dipper took her hand and helped her step inside. “This is our other daughter. Merrise, say hello to your grandparents.”

“Um, hello.” Her eyes kept to the floor.

Dipper rubbed the back of his neck. “She’s, uh, not used to social situations yet.”

“That’s alright, neither’s Mabel,” Dad said with a hearty laugh. Mabel stuck out her tongue at him, but Merrise’s grip still felt clammy in Dipper’s palm.

Mrs Pines got down on one knee to face Merrise at eye level. “Hello there dear. It’s alright, we won’t bite. Here, I’m Mary.” She offered out her hand and gingerly Merrise accepted the handshake. Mom gasped slightly. “How about that? Six fingers.” Dipper felt the shutters guarding his secrets come crashing back down inside him. Even the perception filter couldn’t hide that quirk of Merrise’s anatomy. His daughter looked like she’d been accused of something and Dipper’s heart twisted up without anything he could say to make things easier. “Well, I’m sure you’ll fit in with our family in no time,” his mother said, guiding her into the sitting room with her aunts.

“You ok, Mace?” his father said, noticing his anxious expression. “You’ll want some help unpacking I suppose. Here, I’ll take this box.”

Dad went to pick up the journal crate but Dipper’s swift reflexes cut him off. “No, I’ve got this one. Thanks Dad, you can help the girls get the rest of the stuff out of the car. We’re gonna have a great Christmas.” Dipper gritted his teeth and set off upstairs with the crate in hand, leaving his confused father behind. Inwardly he cursed. If this is how he reacted to his parents noticing one small facet of Merrise, how on Earth would he cope with the stress of revealing the existence of an entire second life? Wrapped up in internally critiquing himself, Dipper failed to notice the golden light seeping out of the crate in his arms. Something flickered between the pages of the journals, bringing light to long buried secrets.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

“This’ll be great, like a sleepover, only we’re married!” Mabel had to shout to be heard over the incessant sound of air pumping into her and Zera’s inflatable beds down in the sitting room beside Waddles’ mat. Dipper had already conked out immediately in his old bedroom, which he was sharing with Pacifica alongside a cot for Wendy. Merrise was taking Mabel’s old room, which left the couple sleeping on the floor.

Zera didn’t seem to mind, enjoying the opportunity to wander around the twins’ old home and marvel at framed photos and little souvenirs the family had collected. The mantlepiece was adorned with trinkets from the vacations the Pines had used to go on together before the twins’ first summer in Gravity Falls. Little snowglobes sat beside fridge magnets from every other museum or theme park on the West Coast. After 2012 there was a dropoff in mementos from these family trips. The twins had never quite reconnected with their mundane lives in the same way.

Mabel’s phone buzzed in the pocket of the black cat onesie she’d chosen for pyjamas. “Ooh, lemme get that. Dad, can you help Zera with the second bed?”

“You got it pumpkin,” he said, grunting as he unplugged the hose from the fully inflated airbed.

Zera watched her wife pace around, engrossed in the call with a tail flopping around behind her. She chuckled at the sight and failed to hide a small blush.

“I hope you’ve made an honest woman of my daughter,” Mr Pines said, and Zera immediately stood to attention.

“Oh, yes sir, I have,” Zera said. “No dishonesty from me, that’s for sure.” Mabel heard this and flashed a wink in her direction. Zera only blushed brighter.

Mabel put a finger in one ear, trying to drown out the sound of the pump again. “Yeah, 3 tons of the stuff. I want it delivered by the 6th. Thanks. Yeah. You too, bye.”

“What was that all about, May?” her father asked as she ended the call.

“Nothing,” she said in a highly suspicious way. “Just a little project I have planned back home for the new year. Don’t tell Dipper or Pacifica.”

He shrugged. “If you say so. Whatever you have planned, I'm sure it’ll be hard to miss.” The second airbed was ready so he started packing the pump away. “There. You two newlyweds get the finest honeymoon suite of all: the Pines family living room. Isn’t it grand?”

“Yes Mr Pines, all ship-shape around here,” Zera said, standing rigid.

He slapped his daughter-in-law on the back, taking her breath away. “Now now, there’s no need for formality. We’re all Pines here.” She relaxed her posture and went to test out the springiness of her bed. “Yes, you two don’t have to worry about anything. Over this holiday period Mary and I will make it as relaxing as humanly possible.”

“Thanks.” Zera smiled at Mabel. “I hope I make a good impression.”

“Of course my dear.” Mr Pines sidled over to Mabel and lightly nudged her in the ribs. “Although you couldn’t have married a millionaire like Dip?” he whispered

“Daaaad’” Mabel groaned, embarrassed in a way she hadn’t felt in years.

Seeing that her mood hadn’t darkened too much at the jab, he continued. “I’m just saying, your brother got extremely lucky with dear Pacifica.”

“I’m a disgraced millionaire I think you’ll find.” Pacifica stuck her head around the doorway. “Mason’s out like a light already, poor thing. That’s what ten hours of driving’ll do to you. Wendy too, all very peaceful. She’s too tired to put up a fuss. You lovebirds all set?”

“Definitely,” Mabel said, “I can sleep anywhere.” She flopped down onto her bed with a force that threatened to burst it, covering it up with a grin.

Zera tapped a finger to her chin before nodding. “You know I think I was once a millionaire briefly. Then I lost it all on roulette.”

“A gambler, are you?” Mr Pines asked and Mabel felt her heart leap in her throat.

“Oh sure,” Zera said, missing Mabel’s frantic signals to stop talking. “In fact, you might say May and I met in a casino.”

“Really?” Mr Pines raised an eyebrow while Mabel slumped down in shame. She didn’t want to bring up any of the real facts about how they’d met Zera, mainly because that story involved alien cops, magic temples, and thieves from beyond the stars. But even the basics seemed incriminating in some way.

“Or at least reconnected in one,” Zera continued obliviously. “May was passing through and I was in the middle of this high stakes game, a lot of money on the line…”

Pacifica on the other hand had picked up on Mabel’s distress, so coughed into her fist. “Gee, is that the time? I’d better check on Merrise before she goes to sleep.” She stretched her arms and placed a conspiratorial hand on Zera’s shoulder. “Try not to ramble on too long about all that romance stuff. You don’t wanna bore your hosts.”

Zera’s eyes widened and she subtly nodded. “Oh, right. Well, uh, it was a dull anecdote anyway.” Mabel breathed a sigh of relief as Pacifica left and Mr Pines seemed placated. “There are plenty of reasons how we met, but who we are is more important. Mabel is very sweet, and kind even to people who probably don’t deserve it. But she also doesn’t take anything lying down, always fighting to make the world a better place in some small way. She makes me prouder of who I am. You could say that’s why we got together.”

Mr Pines grunted in affirmation. “Hmmph, well as long as you’re not one of those Greenpeace hippy types my daughter seems to gravitate towards that’s alright with me.”

Mabel rolled her eyes, but grinned. Despite her long list of romances she’d never really managed to introduce any of them to her parents. Even back then she hadn’t been a particularly self-conscious kid, but with all her short flings and eclectic taste in partners she’d never found ‘the one’ to bring home for polite conversation. Zera passing the vibe check with her father wasn’t something she’d expected to be a problem, but it was nice all the same that he accepted her in his own begrudging way. She chuckled to herself, imagining the reaction if Zera was in her true form. Dad would probably freak out. Might be worth it to help Dipper skip over all his angst.

“There it is!” Merrise scurried into the room and dived into the pile of bags the group had dumped inside earlier. She grabbed a small llama plushie and clutched it to her chest. She wore one of Mabel’s old sleeping shirts, a few sizes too big and hanging loosely on her taller frame.

“Ah, you all set for bed Merrise?” Mr Pines asked. “Am I saying that right?”

“You stress the second syllable. Like: Me-rrise.”

“Sorta like Merry, but she doesn’t like being called that,” Mabel added, receiving a scowl from her niece in return.

Mr Pines tried out the name a few times until he was satisfied with the pronunciation. “Merrise. Nice name. Not heard it before. If you don’t mind me asking, where is it from?”

“From? From my… birth parents,” she offered, confused by the question.

“No, I mean,” he struggled with his words. “Where does it originate as a name?”

“Dad!” Mabel interjected. “You can’t go round asking people where they’re from like that.”

He held up his hands in apology “Sorry, sorry, touchy subject.” There was a frosty silence in the room only punctured when Zera leant on her bed, making a squeak. Rubbing his arm, Mr Pines said, “I’m just trying to learn more about you, Merrise. Since you’re part of the family now, and I don’t want to say anything that might make you uncomfortable. So in the future I’ll try not to make any mistakes like that again.”

“I- thank you,” Merrise quietly said. “Night everyone.” The others all said goodnight and Merrise shuffled back upstairs.

Mr Pines thumbed at the door and followed. “Ahem, I’ll go check if your mother’s ready for bed. Goodnight Mabel, Zera.”

The couple shared a glance. “Well, that could’ve gone better,” Zera muttered. Mabel stayed silent and laid back on her airbed.

Zera was right. Suddenly Dipper’s worries didn’t seem so abstract. Her dad was trying to get to know Zera and Merrise, but the thundering awkwardness of his attempt only left Mabel regretting the whole endeavour. Maybe with time both he and Mom would avoid any difficult questions, but she knew it wouldn’t be long before something unravelled the truth.

Mabel groaned. It had always seemed simple in the past, laid out like one of Dipper’s overly complex plans. ‘Mom and Dad finding out about the Journals = No more adventures’. That was the equation he’d laid out. So she’d given no further thoughts to it and gone on enjoying her teen years exploring magical mysteries.

But there were factors she’d failed to consider, like how keeping such a big part of herself hidden would create an inevitable distance from her parents, or how the weight of disobedience would fade as she and Dipper grew older and found their independence. Then there were her own activities, activism across the globe, the sort of things that got her put on government watchlists. Mom and Dad already knew the gist of that time of her life - they could hardly miss her face on nightly news reports - choosing not to pry any deeper into the unsavoury details. If they could handle ‘May Pines: global disruptor’, then what harm would the truth about Zera and Merrise cause now?

She knew one answer: it would reveal her as a liar. Dipper didn’t get that, thought it was still all about the magic and portals. That stuff wasn’t what mattered, Mabel realised. It was the idea that she couldn’t even trust her Dad about the most important things of all. She’d had the chance to watch her father cheerily chat with his granddaughter and didn’t want to burst the bubble yet.

Zera had noticed Mabel’s distress and laid down with one arm around her. Lying there, Mabel anticipated that whatever happened the next few days were going to be tricky to navigate. At least she had someone to rely on, she thought as Zera kissed her on the cheek. They could worry about her parents in the morning. As Zera got up to get into bed, Mabel surprised her with a kiss of her own and dragged her back down. Simple pleasures could help her forget her worries for one night.

[hkthatgffan]

ALEX PLEASE! I CAN'T TAKE HANDLE THIS MUCH BABY BILL CONTENT IN ONE YEAR! 😭🥺

"These horrible wretched babies birthed from the pen of Emmy Cicierega."

[beartitled]

👉Previous comic👈

Shoutout to @dimsumyoulose @eksvnd and other ppl who discussed evil parents AU in the comments ❤️

Now I will yap about evil cipher parents AU 😈

This is my version of Scalene and Euclid

I was heavily inspired by @nyanaknifegal designs

(Those are canon in my head, they are incredible and I adore flat versions sm 💕)

So what happened after da baby was kidnapped

Cipher parents were devastated that their little precious child was no longer with them

Fellow euclidians didn’t believe that a baby could just disappear into thin air, thinking poor parents went crazy

After being written off as insane by their own people

Ciphers started the search mission on their own

by purposefully a l t e r i n g t h e i r e y e s

By attempting to do something that no euclidian done before

Euclid Cipher lost his eyes

Scalene, however, was luckier in her attempt

The victory costed her just one

After that

Well

No one could hold their rage back

Hope u guys liked my lil headcanons for this AU ❤️

Also to specify, no they did not see Ford and Dipper when they kidnapped the smol dorito child, maaaaybe Scalene saw a glimpse of Ford’s hand

I headcanon that they found out who kidnapped their kid after they successfully mutated

Also guess who grown and didn’t become a psychopath 🎉

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

Doodle dump for the HWINEBHABWNAJCAHOWEEATOWEUB AU!!

A little Fiddleford doodle and the gang (FINALLY) going to get Ford some goddamn furniture in his shack.

------

The doomed narrative twins >:)

------

Fun fact: Wendy and Soos got 'hired' as Ford's unofficial lab assistants completely by accident! Soos kind of just. Attached himself to Ford, kind of similarly as he did with Stan.

Meanwhile, Wendy was recruited a little later when her friends dared her to enter the notorious "Mystery Shack" of the ever elusive Stanford Pines, mad scientist and eater of children (at least according to the rumors). When she discovered that Ford was just. Some nice guy, she felt bad and offered to help him clean up the mess she made by breaking in, and stuck around ever since :]

[megamindsupremacy]

Explain Yourselves AU:

Spent all of class coming up with this instead of taking notes. Enjoy

Edit: Part 2 in the notes!

(Transcribed under the cut)

gravity falls human bill AU where bill comes back as a human except instead of dropping in at the mystery shack, he appears outside of mabel and dipper’s house in piedmont

dipper and mabel have So Much explaining to do

their parents want to call the cops but mabel and dipper are like NO. DONT.

we canNOT let anyone know he’s here and alive. actually we might have to kill him.

parents, hearing their thirteen year olds casually discuss murder: WHAT

theyre like “we have to call the grunkles” and the parents are ?? plural? grunkleS?

then they have to back up nd explain ford

and all of that

this whole time bill is tied to a kitchen chair all gagged and blindfolded and yelling in annoyance

mabel and dipper are ignoring him and the parents are Very Much Not Ignoring Him

they call the grunkles and explain the situation and the parents hear a twin WHAT followed by a lot of yelling and swearing and crashing and then stan says “okay we’ll be there by tomorrow love you kids STAY SAFE BYE”

dipper: wait. if they’re getting here tomorrow then… what do we do with Bill in the meantime?

mabel, behind him holding a frying pan: i have an idea

parents: NO

they ungag him and it’s like. dipper and mabel armed with grappling hook + baseball bat plus their parents standing behind them trying to figure out if a) their kids are having a mental break and b) if they just kidnapped some random dude

these concerns are quickly allayed when bill starts threatening to kill everyone really loudly and graphically

then suddenly dipper is like. wait. if you could kill us by ripping our skin off our bones limb by limb…. why haven’t you don’t that already

bill:

Dipper:

bill:

dipper: ARE YOU POWERLESS

bill: nO-

mabel gets him with the frying pan

[chiropter36]

grrraa i knew i just freakin knew it, i've been avoiding searching for headcanons on those particular characters since book of bill came out cause i just freakin knew people were going to take that one AMBIGUOUS statement made by a character who, ya know, famously got defeated because he UNDERESTIMATED FAMILIAL RELATIONSHIPS, and take it in the most negative interpretation possible. but i stupidly looked at the notes on a post about shermie and gaaaaaaaaaa

Dammit I have got to get around to organizing my pines family headcanons into something readable and throw them into the void just to balance things out a bit.

But for the record, as far as I'm concerned, Dipper and Mabel's parents did indeed have some marital issues that led to the fight Dipper overheard (though Dipper's anxiety led to him blowing it slightly out of proportion in his head, hence the bad dreams), they did indeed send the kids to Stan IN PART to give themselves some time to try to work out their issues without them knowing and stressing about it, and... over the summer they successfully do so. And by the time the twins come back have a stronger bond than ever. Because Bill being completely wrong in his insinuations is funny.

[when-gravity-has-fallen]

Okay I need to talk about Mr. And Mrs. Pines (Dipper and Mabel's parents) somewhere because idk how much will be revealed via asks. Maybe I'll write a proper fanfiction someday but for now I'm just yapping. The Axolotl should not have given me this power haha.

CONTENT WARNINGS FOR THE FOLLOWING: 🚨⚠️

Death, injury, car accidents, abuse, family issues, cheating/infidelity, bad religious experiences, general discussion of war, and discussion of divorce

PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I MISSED SOMETHING. I apologize in advance for possible missing warnings.

First off, Dad Pines' name is Connor amd Mom Pines' name is Lillian! Because why not? That's just the names I came up with 2014 and it's just continued to feel right ever since.

So that baby? Held in Caryn Pines' arms in A Tale of Two Stans? That confuses the hell out of everyone? Yeah that baby.

In my version of events here that baby is Shermie's kid. Dad Pines.

As is a popular headcanon, I also have Shermie being a Vietnam veteran and Ma Pines was helping Mrs. Shermie (I've called her Emma for a long time. Don't ask why. Maybe her name will change idk) to care for Baby Connor, which is what we see during the fight between the OG Mystery Twins.

When Shermie finally returns home from war, he finds out that Stan was kicked out by Filbrick, which... he's not happy about. As a result he moves his family west to Reno, Nevada. Due to moving, general hustle-bustle of life, and raising a family, he unfortunately is unable to contact Stan. He couldn't attend the funeral due to work conflicts and regrets not going. (Well. Until Ford comes back that is. Likely before or at some point during their boat travels they give ol Sherman a visit)

The Pines (aka Shermie and "Emma") also raise their family as Jewish but are more casual in it than Filbrick and Caryn were. Shermie in particular is more casual, especially after Vietnam whereas Emma is more devout.

They also have three more sons after Connor. Idk/remember their names. I'll just say one of them is Abraham. No they don't have a lot of details or relevance. Sorry kids.

Either during Connor's late high school years or time in college he becomes agnostic.

He's a football fool and he was a quarterback for his team in high school.

___________

Lillian was the result of a sex worker at a bachelor's party. Her parents initially were both in Illinois but her father moved to Minnesota (or fudging East Dakota if Bill is right about it not being real). She didn't know her father (John) until she was ~10, when she came under his care due to the passing of her beloved mother (Margaret).

Her father was shocked as to her existence and had to put together two and two. Something in him couldn't turn her away so he took her in.

Her stepmother (Agatha) was unfortunately of the Cinderella kind. She was very unhappy about the physical manifestation of her husband's infidelity and therefore shunned Lillian. Her father despite being unable to turn Lillian away, rarely properly parented her and stayed out of conflicts between his daughter and wife.

John and Agatha were Lutheran Christians, dragging Lillian to church until she was 14. As a little girl she liked it but developed a nullness over time, especially with how other church members discussed single mothers and sex workers. She became agnostic over the course of her teens.

She loved playing hockey in her spare time.

Lillian had two half-brothers and though they weren't the closest they helped make her home life more bareable.

Close enough she'd miss them when she finally was able to jump ship at 18.

And wouldn't you know it? She eventually came to Reno.

__________

Connor during his college years was a frat boy and became overly confident in his approach with women. Therefore when the fraternity were celebrating their graduations/last time officially together, he is *shook* when the most beautiful woman (one of the bartenders) he's ever seen replies to his pick-up line like this-

Connor: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

Lillian: Are you calling me Satan?

Considering how Connor.exe was not working she tells him she's just joking, getting no response (or really anything indicating he's alive aside from an occasional blink). One of his buddies comes up teasing him and orders them drinks.

Yet throughout the night he can't stop thinking about her and occasionally glances over, watching her in her rhythm making drinks or wiping down the counter.

A couple days later, he decides to try that new diner (it'd actually been around almost a year but I digress) for breakfast. Lo and behold, Lillian is also a waitress there!

Despite the food or beverages not being his favorite it becomes his routine to go there. Any moment he can get to see this person who has caught his eye like none have before.

Around this time a few of his frat friends want to go have a weekend of fun in Vegas together and contact him. They arrange for the trip and head towards Vegas (Connor of course giving Lillian a heads-up).

Over time, they become good friends and it's now Connor's heart that has been caught as well. He means to ask her out but he keeps getting nervous just like he did with his first crush.

Then tragedy strikes.

They get into a terrible car accident, of which only Connor and one friend barely survive. The latter sadly passes later in the hospital.

When Lillian gets the news her stomach drops and races to figure out which hospital he's at. He's began to mean so much to her. She finally finds him, comatose.

She visits him whenever she can, meeting his family during those visits. Emma absolutely thinks her to be daughter in law material. Shermie does too he's just not vocal about it.

Connor finally reawakes and has to work through some grief (though maybe not all of it?). Lillian is by his side through it all.

When he's recovered the two start dating. Wahoo! They eventually get married! Wahoo! They get a house in Piedmont at some point (maybe an old vacation/summer home Sherman had? Idk)

_________

Around their early 30s in 1999 they have our favorite anxious boy and sparkly girl!

Emma is very excited for her grandkids and thus when they discover that their twins are boy/girl she releases a crapton of baby announcements. This is how Stan learns of them. He races down to Piedmont the closest weekend and surprises EVERYONE. He had to witness these twins for himself.

Stan becomes attached. He visits often. Him and Lillian actually bond quite a bit due to both having challenge in their pasts. As much as one can when disguised as their brother anyway.

(Shermie finds "Ford's" mannerisms similar to Stan's from what he can remember btw. Stan gives him the excuse of missing his brother. Knowing how the 2 could impersonate each other Shermie nods and moves on, much to Stan's relief)

This is how he ended up being there for the twins' birth.

______

I'm still figuring out the circumstances behind their martial issues in 2012.

Anyway regardless of how they got here, filled with emotions they attempt a divorce...only for the both of them to not be able to finish the paperwork. Deep down they still care so deeply for each other, how can they let go of everything they've built? The family they made? Not to mention how distressing it would be for their kids.

So despite their own skeptism with therapy, they're at their wit's end. They decide to try it. After all they could always still divorce if needed, why not give it a go? Turns out it's really good for them and they reconnect. So Dipper and Mabel get to come back to a healthier, happier, more wholesome household ☺️

And now that their parents have been introduced to the importance of therapy, they can get their now traumatized kids help...

They also renew their vows at some point with Mabel being the flower girl and Dipper bearing the rings.

That's pretty much all I have to say on them. I kinda love them a lot 🫶

Questions about these guys are so welcome, like seriously I've grown such an attachment to them.

[knockknockwhosthereartistism]

Dipper and Mabel’s parents should count themselves lucky it took 40 years for these two losers to reconcile

[evilgoodguys]

inspired by an old photograph of me and my sis :]