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#Derby Girls Who Play Hockey
muldermuse · 7 months
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oh girl have reader sleep with a hockey player, gator will be pissssssed
ESPECIALLY IF
shes talking to Gator about how good looking she thinks he is, maybe one night her and Gator are sitting on her couch just whilst he’s putting his shoes back on and a local ice hockey derby is playing
“why are they all good looking? like especially him, number 7” gator doesn’t see you’re staring at the screen with heart eyes at this random player
he’s focusing on tying his laces and doesn’t look up as he speaks to you, “hes from ‘round here, hangs out at that dive bar in town- s’one of his first games…wait, what the fuck did you say? they’re all good lookin’?”
AND THEN a few weeks later, you’re out with some friends at the bar and Gator gets a call for a disruption outside and when he walks in WHO DOES HE SEE
you sat on number 7’s lap 🙂🙂🙂🙂
(i live vicariously through our two sinners reader)
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ladylooch · 5 months
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I shit you not! I went snorkling (it's kinda cold af for me now tho so yes I did freeze) and ran into that same little girl who we decided is Gracie Meier! The blonde hair and curious mind who was literally named Gracie!!
She asked if I remembered her and oh she has no idea how much I remembered her 🤯
Turns out she lives close to that particular beach and when we were chatting she said how her favourite hobby is roller skating.
Which is so close to ice skating 😂. Plot twist, Gracie joins the roller derby once she decides her hockey days are over 😂 for real that sport can be brutal at times tho!
Actual: have we talked about all her little phases or what kind of activity/sport/hobby she lands on?
OH MY GOSH I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!!!!! Gracieeeee 😇 Lil angel baby!
I could see her loving roller blading! Idk that she would play in a league for it tho. But I totally see it being her and daddy's activity together in the summer!
She tried hockey, but I am really pushing for her to by a lil gymnast. Nothing hard core like she's going to the olympics. But she's good at it and has fun. Maybe at some point she transitions to dance and does that for a bit.
As for her other hobbies, I have vivid images of her loving science, like biology specifically- animals, plants, learning about muscles and blood types 😂 They cannot keep her entertained enough with books as a kid. When they go out to dinner, it's not an iPad they bring with, it's books about spider or caterpillars or different types of trees.
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Thanks for the tag @frostysfrenzy !! Sorry it took me a bit I been goin' thru it :,)
Are you named after anyone? Yeah Kathryn Janeway bc my parents love Star Trek
Last time you cried? Earlier in the day lmao I'm goin' thru it
Do you have kids? God no I am a 23 year old teenage girl
Do you use sarcasm a lot? Uhhh sometimes idk time and place I guess
First thing you notice about people? Usually if they're going to be a pain in the ass or not. I've been in customer service for almost 10 years so you get a spidey sense for that
Eye colour? Mine? Blue. Favourite? Brown.
Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings I guess?
Special talents? I make balloon animals at most town events that are too cheap to pay for my dad (I cost 20/hr he costs 300 to leave the house)
Where were you born? Same place as the trailer park boys
Hobbies? Writing and making greeting cards with my nan :^)
Any pets? I have one cat, my real human daughter and her name is spooky but she goes by Spoobert Doobert in professional circumstances.
What sports do you play/have you played? Oh god like a lot of them. Soccer, Hockey, Football, Roller Derby and Rugby. I ended up needing to hang up sports for real bc of too many brain injuries but these days I still like hiking (nice and low impact with opportunities to see waterfalls)
How tall are you? 5'11
Favourite school subject? None from high school but philosophy when I got to university
Dream job? Retired.
First ship? ZuTarra
Three ships? I'm not a huge shipper honestly
Last (current) song? Nuttville by Buddy Rich (nice beginner-friendly fusion jazz)
Last movie? I watched the entirety of Devil Wears Prada in like 80 parts on TikTok the other night if that counts
Currently reading? Still working on The Rum Diary by HST (got distracted by re-reading my WIP (why can't books write themselves))
Currently watching? Pretty much just Jeopardy at this point lmao (I'm too tired to watch TV when I get home from work)
Currently consuming? Nicotine still :(
Currently craving? A double gin and tonic made with Tanqueray
Tagging: @girlscience @angrywarrior69 @mcusluttt and like anyone who wants to do it
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tmnm · 1 year
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Intro 1- the human kids
Okay, I don’t particularly know how to start but early on, I want the human kids to be more prominent and be given actual character, and I’m starting this also with the humans, because we have an oc in the pile!
I tried to go more in depth with their personalities and their development, just some descriptions because I’m not sure how to kick off the plot.
(small warning for mentioned transphobia?)
April O’Neil
Starting off with April, she has kraang features from the start, and she’s a nervous cryptid child who will bite. She’s very attached to the concept of fitting in and being ‘normal’, she doesn't want to be seen as an outgroup. 
April’s definitely the mom friend, she took a lot after her dad (who’s way more prominent in plots) and she has a heart of gold. However, she tends to blame herself for everything and is a huge people pleaser to feel included. She has the flavor of autism where she wants to know people and wants to fit in.
She lived in Northampton with her parents until she was 6, but for some reason her dad fled to the city one day with her, and now he doesn’t talk about it. She’s been friends with Casey since diapers, and she really doesn’t have that many friends. She’s not completely out, but she’s on the aroace spectrum and a lesbian.
While everyone else in the group run to danger, she curls up into a ball and cries for 45 minutes before biting.
Casey Arnold Jones (later Casey Jones O’Neil)
Casey has depth as a character now! He’s very impulsive and has an ironclad moral compass, tending to run off from the group to fit his morals. He has the power of tmasc gay man power, don’t know where to throw that in
His home life is very similar to IDW, the main difference is that Kirby has essentially adopted him at this point.
He’s a ball of repressed emotions, and he has little to no self preservation because of that, he is very prone to getting carried away and he gets very defensive when he’s not included or looked down upon.
He’s the flavor of adhd that’s very empathetic, but it just turns into him getting upset because of it, he tends to like fighting and hockey because he can get his pent up issues out, he tends to fight a lot with people and has a very strong moral compass
Isabella Del Toro (later Isabella “D’este” Hamato)
Isabella is new to the friend group, she only joined the summer before after moving from Washington. She moved there for better physical therapy after losing her right leg, and she’s getting used to a prosthetic.
She was a jammer in roller derby before that, and her coming out as a girl (and also bi but less so) put a huge wedge in her relationship with her parents, who aren’t accepting.
She’s the flavor of adhd that she plays everything off as a joke, she doesn’t take anything seriously so she doesn’t think about it too hard, she knows her situation is fucked up but she’s too tired to admit that.
She’s less reckless and stays more to the side of fights, but when she’s in the heat of the battle, she usually needs to be dragged out of the situation because she’s either gotten her ass kicked or stopped in the middle of a murder.
She leans heavily on distractions, she appreciates helping people partly because she feels better knowing she’s leaving the world a little better than it was before, but also because she’s pissed that nobody helps them.
The vigilante stuff™️
Casey and Isabella are vigilantes, and April is confused on why they’d put themselves out there in blatant danger, while the other two are confused why she doesn’t see her connections as a call to action.
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kwiktonki · 2 years
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badgerfrogs · 3 years
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gaang roller derby au
the local team is called the ba sing skaters
their main rival is the flameos, who live in the next town over
there’s another local team called the kyoshi rollers. they don’t have a coach, which is unusual, but self-governance serves them well. they’re at the top division of the league and they’re very hard to join, tryouts are always super competitive (at least three girls usually end up with something sprained and the referee always ends up crying) (it’s sokka. sokka is the referee) and the training is lethal
toph and katara are on the ba sing skaters
toph is amazing at roller derby. her derby name is the blind bandit and she’s evil in the rink but teams who don’t know her will initially go easy on her because she’s blind. she uses this to destroy them and will knock people down without hesitation
toph hates the rules and will break them on purpose. at first it annoyed the rest of the team (katara) but eventually they (katara) got used to it. the rest of the team (katara) will not admit that they (katara) secretly delight in breaking rules and do it as well.
katara is also really good. her derby name is the painted lady, she’s team captain and occasionally helps the medic when someone gets hurt (sometimes by her own hand, she will not admit it but she has a LOT of pent up rage that she takes out when competing)
is it weird that a straight girl is captain of a roller derby team? yeah, but they just roll with it.
aang is at every single game katara and toph play. he hates seeing people get hurt but toph always tells him “it’s a contact sport, twinkletoes. what did you expect?” so he sucks it up.
roller derby does not technically have cheerleaders but aang can most definitely be classified as one. he is beloved by all
aang once brought appa to the rink while katara and the ba sing skaters were having a meeting. appa somehow got onto the floor while the kyoshi rollers were practicing and caused a pileup of 5 girls that even suki couldn’t prevent. appa is now banned from the rink.
sokka referees occasionally because he’s really good at getting into the thick of it and breaking up fights (and he promised katara he would do it). he only does that on the side though because he does jam skating and plays roller hockey during the season
sokka also picks up shifts helping the janitor sometimes because he’s a shopaholic and his bank account is suffering. one time he’s mopping up the bleachers while the kyoshi rollers are practicing and remarks that if they competed against a guys’ team, they would definitely lose. all the kyoshi skaters file to the side of the rink except for suki, who makes sokka put on derby gear and get in the rink to compete against her. she proceeds to beat his ass both figuratively and literally. sokka does not make any comments after that, and compliments the kyoshi rollers whenever he sees them practicing
sokka and suki date for a little bit but decide after a couple months that they’re ultimately better as friends. they stay really close, and sokka still goes to every kyoshi rollers game.
jet tries to commit arson on the roller rink (don’t ask me why i just think it’s funny)
the ba sing skaters and the kyoshi rollers, for their part, recognize that jet is going through it because he’s still dealing with the loss of his parents, and they also know that the local circuit court judge, long feng, is ruthless when it comes to punishment, even for minors. so they go and testify for jet and lie (sokka testifies too but only after a long moral lecture from katara), saying that someone knocked over a lamp and jet was in the wrong place at the wrong time. it’s ridiculous and long feng knows it’s a lie, but the jury believes it and jet is let off. jet, for his part, goes to the rink and thanks the team profusely. he hangs out with some of them sometimes after that and they’re a good influence on him.
jet encourages smellerbee to join the ba sing skaters, telling her the girls are really nice. smellerbee joins and the girls are immediately accepting, and it’s hugely affirming gender-wise for smellerbee because she came out as trans a little less than a year ago. jet and longshot go to all of her games to cheer her on.
ty lee and mai are on the flameos
ty lee’s gymnastics training from when she was young gives her an unexpected edge. her chi-blocking techniques also come in handy too
mai works really well with ty lee. she and ty lee are their team’s star pivot and jammer, respectively; whenever they play together in a jam the team is guaranteed to win
mai and ty lee have a RIDICULOUS amount of romantic tension and it drives the rest of the team crazy because every single person realizes it except them
azula got banned from the league permanently because yes, roller derby is a contact sport, but she took it way too far and three girls ended up in the hospital.
azula later starts her own team outside of the league and tries to convince ty lee and mai to join but they look at her like she is stupid
when zuko gets discharged from the hospital after being kicked out of ozai’s house, iroh tries to convince him that playing a team sport will be good for him. (zuko’s done martial arts his whole life but iroh thinks he really needs to make some friends.)
zuko refuses to join any men’s sports because they scare him and he doesn’t like being in groups of majority straight men. however, he soon decides he really wants to play roller derby and tries out to join the flameos because there isn’t a men’s team he can try out for. at first the flameos are suspicious of his intentions and reticent to let him join but a) iroh tells the coach about zuko’s backstory, b) zuko has a badass scar which the firegirls think can be used to intimidate the other team, and c) zuko’s intentions are not creepy because he is clearly extremely gay
katara is PISSED that a guy is allowed on the flameos, even if it’s not her team, because for a lot of the girls roller derby is a place when they can have fun and let loose without men being there. she tells aang as such, and even though he tries to convince her that maybe she should give him a chance, she won’t budge. however, two weeks later when the ba sing skaters compete with the flameos, she realizes that zuko isn’t even good, after which she is suddenly okay with it
at first zuko yells a lot (as he does in his day-to-day life) when there’s arguments during competition, until all the girls (including his own team) get tired of it and yell back at him that if they let him be on the team he should have the decency to not make them hear a man’s voice
zuko does not yell after that during competition. he does, however, cry a lot.
in general all the roller derby girls, no matter what team they’re on, will take any chance they can get to beat a guy’s ass (the only reason they didn’t do it to zuko when he yelled is because they knew, at least vaguely, about his abusive father and they have basic human decency)
eventually, the flameos get used to having zuko on the team and come to see him as a bit of a mascot. not being allowed to yell, he cries so many times that they decide he needs protecting, especially after he cries during a team bonding session when he tells them about his dad. he’s perfectly capable of protecting himself, of course, but it’s nice to have people who support him.
if one of the things that protecting zuko entails is keying ozai’s car, smashing his windows, and graffitiing his house while he’s away on a business trip, then, well? you didn’t see it happen.
one time zuko saw a male referee grope one of the girls when breaking up a fight and managed to overcome his fear of men in sports long enough to scream at the ref and beat him up until he was on the floor
to be clear, the roller derby girls will beat up any harasser they see. it just so happened that zuko was the one who noticed first that time
the flameos are impressed that zuko overcame his fear of men in sports to defend one of his teammates and buy him a blue slushie after the game (it was 11:00 p.m. and 7/11 was all out of cherry). zuko spills it all over himself and the team jokes that he should make his derby name the blue slushie. this is the perfect excuse to say "actually, i think the blue spirit is a cooler name," and the rest of the team agrees. no one knows that the blue spirit is actually the name of zuko's camp persona that he's been wanting to name himself for forever
toph has destroyed zuko multiple times in competition
one time sokka is refereeing and toph and zuko are competing in a jam. toph knocks him down way harder than she needs to and he sprains an ankle. despite this clear violation, the two teams get into a huge fight. sokka skates in, breaks it up, and drags zuko out of the rink
while the medic patches zuko up on the sidelines, sokka sits with him and tries to comfort him, thinking that zuko will be humiliated after getting absolutely wrecked by a twelve year old. zuko is not humiliated but he is sad because he won’t be able to play for a month.
zuko doesn't realize that the no-yelling rule doesn’t apply when he’s injured, so he doesn’t yell in pain and instead cries profusely.
sokka, meanwhile, has decided that this boy is very cute and tells him that he’ll hang out with him while zuko watches the games from the sidelines for the next few weeks. by the time he’s back in the rink, zuko and sokka are dating.
toph will not apologize for spraining zuko's ankle and told zuko he should thank her because she basically got him a boyfriend.
zuko wrote her a thank-you card and toph then yelled at him because she can’t read.
at this point, katara has gotten used to seeing zuko at derby games but hates that her brother is dating him, especially because he’s from the enemy team. every time she sees him with sokka, she says, “oh, look. it’s the boy that the flameos let on their team,” just so that he knows his place.
zuko tries to pay katara reparations via venmo and by reading audre lorde. once she realizes how earnest he is, she invites him to her monthly movie night with aang, where they watch romantic comedies and eat candy. zuko proves to be a model guest; he cries and laughs at the appropriate portions, accepts his equal proportion of the candy (and brings pastries from the jasmine dragon, which he divides amongst katara, aang, and himself), and awwws at the screen loudly with katara and aang when the main couple ends up happily together. katara and zuko are now best friends.
azula somehow manages to get her team approved (zuko is convinced there was some illegal activity involved, and he’s not wrong), so the ba sing skaters and the flameos decide to team up to take out their common enemy: the lightning wheels.
during the flameos’ match against the lightning wheels, azula almost seriously injures mai during a jam, but ty lee knocks azula down. in the process ty lee sprains an ankle, but while she’s being treated by the medic after the game, mai kisses her and the whole team cheers
the reason there is so much violence that goes unpunished is because bumi owns the rink and he thinks that as long as no one is getting killed, it’s a healthy, somewhat productive way for these teenagers to release all their pent-up anger while learning new skills and exercising. also, he finds it funny.
the only reason that azula got punished and banned while nobody else did is because bumi hates her for trying to feed flopsie chocolate (flopsie lives at the rink and roams free. no one knows what breed of dog (?) he is)
momo is an ugly disgusting stray cat that lives in the rink parking lot and feeds on roaches (zuko secretly feeds momo treats but momo will not let zuko touch him so zuko can't take him home) until one day momo decides he likes aang and follows him home
aang cleans momo up, gets him all his vaccinations, and makes sure he is neutered (he doesn’t need to be. strangely, the vet tells aang that it seems as if momo was... born that way?). aang now has another best friend to love alongside his other best friends, and appa finds a great sense of kinship with momo as well.
zuko is incredibly jealous and tries to take this out on katara, who keeps showing him photos of aang cuddling with momo, but she threatens to report him to the national league for breaking the rules re: gender so he shuts up very quickly
sokka briefly contemplated pulling a zuko and joining the flameos despite him being a man, but then remembered he would have to compete against katara who would not hesitate to bash his brains out while toph smashed his ankles and they would both go unpunished because bumi doesn’t care, so he quickly decided against it. he deeply admires zuko’s fortitude in the face of teenage girl wrath.
katara gave zuko a concussion once. she tried to blame it on toph, but everyone knows the truth.
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passivenovember · 3 years
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Cherry Cola Sundays.
Harringrove April, Day Twelve : Soda.
For @cherrydreamer , who inspires me always.
-- 
Dawn should be covered in bubble wrap, just. Head to toe and back up again. Protective layers securing each pigtail and both perpetually skinned knees until they feel comfortable letting her out of the house.
As a precaution, you know, an insurance policy. Billy laughs at him, like, “Kids get hurt sometimes, baby.”
And Steve scowls, because. He doesn’t understand that. 
The way Billy, who was put on his mother’s back in a baby bjorn and rowed out to surf the first wave as soon as he learned to walk, can sit there and fucking. 
Say that.
“Not our kid.” Steve hates the way his voice quivers. Weak and pathetic, like some sort of wet nurse losing control as time goes on. “One skinned knee and they’ll come take her from us, Bill, I cant--”
Billy slides in behind him, kissing up the back of Steve’s neck and petting the hair out of his face, like. He always does when it gets difficult to breathe.
“I won’t let them do that,”
Steve snorts around the sob in his chest. “You’re dying to teach the kid to cut a wave, I see the way your eyes light up when she grips the edge of the coffee table.”
Billy considers it, mouth scrunching up on one side, like, “There aren’t any waves to surf in Hawkins, but if there were--”
“We don’t do that kind of shit in the Midwest.”
“What? Have fun?”
“No.” Steve turns in the circle of Billy’s arms, sighing. “We have fun without wheels attached to our feet. Y’know; hop scotch and jump rope until the appropriate age and then we stop. Move on to other sports like football and cheerleading.”
Billy studies his face. “You’d let Dawn--”
“No. No, I. Wouldn’t.” Steve says gently. But. “I have a feeling we aren’t gonna let that girl do anything, she’ll just--”
“Do it.” Billy agrees. “Yeah.”
So Steve tries not to hover. 
Tries not to hold his breath every time Dawn encounters something new and stressful; slip ‘n slides, bounce castles, hop scotch, t-ball, and eventually. 
The shit Billy’s into. 
Dangerous, exciting, horrifying shit that makes Steve reconsider the whole bubble wrap situation.
Like skating. Dawn strapped to Billy’s chest just like his mother before him, the first time she sees Billy break out the longboard for their trip to the park with Max. 
Steve will never forget the look on her face.
Eyes wide and glassy. Tiny, quivering chin obviously worried that Billy would hurt himself so he asks, “Wanna ride with me, little mama? Keep me safe?”
And Steve makes a noise. 
A concerned, fatherly, responsible noise that’s completely drowned out an vetoed when Billy adds, “Keep each other safe,” and Dawn climbs on the board in front of him, tiny smile turning into thrilled giggles as he maneuvers around cracks in the pavement. 
Steve follows close behind, arms ready to catch precious cargo when Dawn yells, “Go faster Daddy!”
And Steve has to jog to keep up, practically dry heaving as Max skates lazily down the road beside him. 
--
The idea of roller hockey surfaces two weeks before Dawn’s sixth birthday and four days after grandma and grandpa Hop sent a pair of lady bug skates in the mail.
“You know what would be cool,” Billy says distantly, head bent over the newest vase from their fall collection, “Is if we learned roller hockey and had Dawn’s birthday bash at the rink.” He looks up, left cheek covered in paint and a stupid, honey sweet smile on his face, like, “Wouldn’t that be cool, dad?”
Dawn begs. 
And begs, begbegbegs when Billy wipes his hands on Steve’s apron. Hugging him around the neck and suggesting they all get a pair of roller skates and practice in the park together, dressed as different insects, maybe. Dawn as the lady bug, Billy as the butterfly and Steve as the sunflower they land on.
Billy kisses him slow and sweet. “And maybe, if Dawn gets really good, she could try out for real in the fall--”
Steve feels like the bad guy when his answer is no. 
Billy frowns, pulling away. “No to the rink party or no to the--”
No.
Just flat out. Simple. Steve turns into the villain with his parade of:
No, you might get hurt. 
No, you don’t even know how to skate.
No, I’d feel better if you learned to play the flute, baby--
Watching as Billy looks like a kicked puppy dog and Dawn’s cheeks turn bright red. She screams at him for the first time that day. Insists that she’s not a baby, she’s a big girl, and Steve is a big fat poopy-scoopy-butt head. 
Her bedroom door slams shut, walls vibrating as if the Earth were splitting in two. Steve and Dawn's worlds cracking together and apart. 
--
Steve’s answer is still no. 
No. Everyday for the next week and a half, when Billy brings it up in bed that night and Dawn gifts him the last cherry cola.
Steve won’t be bribed. He sticks by his guns, all the solid, sure-fire reasons that come across his lips in the mirror every morning.
No, Bills. She isn’t old enough.
No, Dawn. You’re a big girl but you aren’t ready yet. 
And eventually, when Steve’s husband and daughter join forces like some sort of nightmare dream team:
No. Daddy’s not ready to see you grow up.
--
Max is the determining factor. 
“I play roller derby,” She says. “Let me teach the brat to skate.”
Steve opens his mouth.
Billy beats him to it. “No.” He mimics bitterly. “Steve is 100% against our child having any of the fun we had as kids. Any of the adventure.”
“She can have adventure, Bills.” Steve ignores Max’s eyes on them as the argue over the patio table. “She can do all sorts of fun, normal, decent shit that keeps her safe--”
“Fuck safe. Max. This guy won’t let her do anything.” Billy leans forward with a cigarette pinched between his teeth. Listing things on his fingers. “No skating, no gymnastics, no climbing up big rocks at the park without a helmet--”
Steve scoffs, like, “I just don’t want our kid to have scrambled eggs for brains--”
“Martha and Neil practically set me loose when I was half the size Dawn is, and I turned out fine.” Billy says, tapping his noggin, like.
See. No cracks.
Steve scowls, turning to face his sister in law. “Do you see what I--”
Max is laughing. 
Shoulders bouncing, face buried in hands, laughing at the two of them. Steve opens his mouth to demand, like, what’s so fucking funny when Billy beats him to it. Again. 
“Fuck’s wrong with you?”
���Not me. You guys.”
“Us?” Billy and Steve demand, because. This isn’t a them problem, this is. Like. A world problem. A difference in parenting styles. Something to be expected.
But Max just nods, like, “Yeah. It’s funny because she’s going to do it anyway, I just think it’s better that she knows how to do it properly to avoid getting hurt.”
And Steve.
Thinks maybe Billy paid Max to say that. Thinks they conspired on the phone every night, coming up with the perfect plan. The most fool proof argument that will have Steve sighing. Shaking his head. Scrubbing at his face and saying;
“Alright.”
Billy sits up like someone electrocuted him. “Alright? We win?”
“You win.” Steve admits glumly.
He isn’t ready for the armful of muscle he gets when Billy throws himself into Steve’s lap, smooching his eyelids and throat, like, “I knew you weren’t such a goddamn stick in the mud, Harrington!”
Steve nods stiffy. “Yeah, yeah, but look. I have conditions.”
Billy pulls himself together. 
Steve looks into those sparkling blue eyes and holds out a single, solitary finger. “Any time she gets hurt, you owe me a cherry cola.”
He gets a whole case of them after that just to save time.
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stephaniesramblings · 3 years
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My relationship with sports/athletics has always been an interesting one. Competitiveness runs in my blood. I get it from my Dad. He had two stories he would tell about himself and sports. 1 was how angry his Dad got when he was in high school and the coach didn’t put him in as point guard in the state championship. They lost. The other was how when he was in little league his coach told him to crouch down so he would get walked every at-bat. Yes, my Dad was a short guy. In basketball they called him “Mouse”. He had a lot of spunk. He was scrappy and he could get heated when he was in the midst of battling on the basketball court, or in any other sport he played.
Well, I think I get it from him. As a kiddo, my greatest sporting accomplishments were:
1st grade field day, I earned 1st place in the sprint. I was always proud of this, but became even more proud when I was in my early 20’s. I received a message on FB from a guy I had gone to school with. He had done track in college and took it upon himself to message and tell me that I was the only girl that ever beat him in a race. I guess I should have been offended, but I wasn’t.
The other was my short-lived soccer career. I think I was about 7. I had never played soccer before. How hard could it be? During the try-out I won yet another sprint. So, I made the team. I would pick it up as I went along, right? Well, I was able to get the ball just fine and I could kick it SO far. The only issue was that everytime I kicked it with all my might, it went out of bounds. To the point where I was put in goal, or told to hang down by our net and get the ball away from the other team. Hopefully with all that field in front of me I could just kick it to the coach’s son. It went ok.
When I got to middle school, I tried again. I signed up to play basketball. The school I was at was a small private school, so the girl’s team went from 6-12 grade. I was a benchwarmer being in 6th grade and having little to no skill. It had its ups and downs. One of the first and maybe only times I was put in the game, I got so flustered, I shot on the other team’s net. The entire place was yelling “NOOOOO!”. It didn’t go in luckily, but I was on the bench for a while after that. The times that I felt like I contributed were always on the defensive side of things. I was scrappy like my Dad. I could steal the ball. I angered some of the girls on the other team. Even one time having a girl yell at the ref when I stole the ball from her. A foul was not called, and I let her know about it. It should be noted, Dad always came to watch me and to cheer me on. Even though I mostly rode the bench. He loved it, and of course thought my coach should have put me in more too.
Well, that was kind of the end of it when it came to me and sports. I played a little basketball and floor hockey with the youth group, but never really felt very good at it.
So it was kind of surprising when I was 29, I was working in a lab and two of my coworkers started talking to me about roller derby. As with a lot of derby player’s stories, I saw Whip It, and thought it looked awesome. I wondered if that sort of thing existed, but I didn’t pursue it. My coworkers “Kenya Diggit” and “HK” (I don’t remember what it stood for) would tell me how great it was and how it is quite a commitment. It was not just a sport. I am glad they warned me! I think in my head I considered a sports league like a bowling league or something. Pay your dues, show up on whatever night. Not derby. Other than feeling very down on myself and wanting to get some exercise, I had no other reason to do this. I had tried skating at a few birthday parties at Roller Kingdom growing up. I would switch between skates and blades and usually ended up on the rollerblades, but barely keeping myself up. Why would I do this? Well, I needed something. And they told me that they teach you everything. You just need to get the gear and show up. So I got myself to the skate shop, spent a LOT (to me) of money on all the gear, and figured if I do this, I won’t quit! This proved to be true. I showed up for the 1st night petrified. My friend who still skated, Kenya was a vet, and they were in a different area. I had to put myself out there. I am not a social butterfly, so this was more than just putting myself out there athletically. I had to talk to strangers! I had to try something I knew I would be terrible at, and all the while not knowing how everyone else around me would do. Well, it was a mixed bag. The overriding factor though was that we were all supporting each other at whatever level we were. We encouraged and cheered for each other when we got the thing we kept failing at over and over. I cried over this journey. I thought I would never get crossovers (still wish mine were better) and that I would never be able to transition, therefore I would never pass assessments and never make a team. I didn’t give up though. I don’t know how or why I didn’t, but I didn’t. At some point as I was progressing I watched the sport I was learning to play. Go figure. It only took me almost a year to check it out, but it changed the way I saw everything. I saw the strategy in it. I saw the reason each and every skill was important. It lit a fire in me to keep trying, and to play to my strengths. I never gave up on making my skills better, but they will never be perfect. I accepted myself though and felt pride for where I found myself. And yes, the Morrison competitiveness came out. I was and am a bully on the track. I still like to ruffle my opponent’s feathers. My brain is still geared toward defense. I found though, that I had confidence for maybe the 1st time ever in a sport. It changed me. I found myself on the travel team and going to tournaments. The bond with my teammates just got stronger. From the ones that watched my progression and trained me that were now my teammates, to the people I walked in with on that 1st night, we had a history and we celebrated each other getting it. We had highs and lows too, but we kept showing up and working to be better.
My mom told me the other day that the biggest change she has seen in me has been since roller derby. I love my mom. She always encourages me and tells me awesome I am. How I should be proud of what I've accomplished. It’s so funny to me that she said that because I’ve gone through career changes, marriage, separation, moves, family illness, divorce, you think those things must change you, and I’m sure they did. How funny though that something as silly as a sport or a league could literally give you the confidence to make decisions in your personal life that help you grow. To feel like you matter and you are strong enough to get through whatever obstacle is in front of you. There were nights I dragged myself to practice crying the entire way because of everything going on in my life. I would leave there feeling like I left the weight of the world inside Roll On America.
My Dad was so proud of me because of roller derby. He would always talk about it even in the last few months that I had with him at home. “When are you going up to Maine to play?” My big brother also came to a game the last season before the pandemic. I won MVP that game. I think he had tears in his eyes after. He was so proud of me too. I cried after he left in front of all my league mates that were there. I got all the derby hugs 💚. The beautiful thing is that you don't even need to tell your team what you're going though. They just know how to be supportive in all the little ways. I'm so thankful for these last 8 years and I'm not quitting anytime soon.
Roller derby saved my life.
“I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”
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eagles-translated · 5 years
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Eagles S2 Teaser Trailer breakdown
Thought I’d do a quick breakdown of the teaser trailer that just dropped because we’ve been starved for content for so long lmao
This post got a little long so I added a keep reading button for those of you who are interested in checking it out. Enjoy and feel free to reblog this post with your own ideas and impressions of the trailer! 🥅🏒
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The song playing in the background of the trailer is Say We’re Sorry by Loving Caliber, which is about a broken relationship between two people that are both hurting from each other’s actions:
🎵 We hurt each other’s feelings on and on 🎵 
The chorus is about how the people in this relationship should apologize to each other:
🎵 I guess that we should say we're sorry 🎵
It’s pretty safe to assume that the song is hinting at Felicia and Ludde’s relationship, which fell apart at the end of season 1 when it was revealed that Ludde had (unknowingly) hooked up with Felicia’s best friend Amie at a party a few weeks prior to Ludde getting back together with Felicia. 
They’d also had problems in their relationship before (this is where the “on and on” part of the lyric fits in), such as when Ludde let his friends talk about how Felicia was in bed or the argument they had after Ludde got into a fight with Elias. 
Felicia’s feelings were obviously hurt by this and while I can’t exactly name any situations where Felicia hurt Ludde (maybe because they don’t exist lmao) we know that he himself was hurt when he was apart from her after they’d fought. In episode 6 during the Halloween party, Ludde is pretty depressed because of what had happened with Felicia before.
The song lyrics that are actually featured in the trailer, however, are these four lines which are the intro to the song:
🎵 It's silent now, we don't say a word We're just looking at each other Tears in our eyes from the words we said Yeah, it kinda broke my heart 🎵
They fit very well with what is going on in the trailer - there are no spoken lines as all the characters are silent and only exchanging looks. We see Ludde looking around a classroom and Amie looking behind her, most likely at Ludde:
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There’s also a scene where we see Ludde chasing after Felicia (?) in the hallways and her turning around to look at him in anger. 
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The following lyric “tears in our eyes from the words we said” is emphasized when we see Ludde on the verge of tears after this hallway shot, where he probably regrets how he treated Felicia and the things he said to her back in season 1. He might also be sad because he tried to apologize to Felicia for what he did, but got rejected. In that scenario he could be crying over the words he said in the hallway that weren’t enough and made Felicia angry instead.
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As for how Felicia is feeling about it, she seems to instead be hiding her sadness and either masking it with anger (like with Ludde) or with a stone-cold expression, like the case is when we see her walking through the halls and her classmates are watching her. There are a lot of eyes on Felicia since the whole school probably knows both her best friend and boyfriend betrayed her, but (again) nobody is saying anything.
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The trailer finishes with the lyric “yeah, it kinda broke my heart” which is how both of them are feeling, except Felicia seems to be done with having her heart broken over and over again. We can see that in how she won’t take Ludde back and the look in her eyes on the photo above - she seems way more confident and independent than she did back in the first season. 
Right before Felicia is walking through the hallway there’s a brief shot of her (?) talking to Jack, the new character that seems to be a potential love interest for Felicia and a new obstacle between her and Ludde. I’m not 100% sure if he’s gonna be a love interest, but I’d say it’s likely due to 1) the way he looks at her here and 2) it makes sense that a new guy would be introduced right after Felicia and Ludde are broken up.
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Jack does seem way older than Ludde and I doubt that his character is supposed to be a teenager - he looks a lot more mature from what we’ve seen.
This could be intentional, since Felicia might be done with Ludde’s childishness throughout season 1 in which he would always end up hurting her feelings. That, or she’s looking to rebel against her father even more? Mats was against Felicia dating Ludde and he might be even more against her dating someone much older.
The other shots I haven’t mentioned are a few hockey scenes (since duh, the show is all about hockey):
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It’s a little hard to see who this is (in the words of Amie, tHeY aLL LoOk tHe sAMe!!) but I’m assuming it’s Elias. After the shot of Ludde running after Felicia, the next two shots are of Elias (probably?) and the screenshot above says NKT Arena Karlskrona in the background which is a multi-purpose sporting arena in Karlskrona.
Elias had decided to change to the Karlskrona team in the season 1 finale but we were unsure if he actually went through with it due to what happened to Felicia. The gear is different than the red Eagles hockey shirts, so I’d say it’s either Elias playing for the Karlskrona team or just a Karlskrona teammate. However - this next shot makes me doubt that a little.
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Elias is in a gym (I’m guessing) and right before the shot changes,he lunges forward. It looks like he’s hitting a punching bag. Which makes a lot of sense - he does get angry easily and might be using it as some sort of aggression release or it’s simply just part of his workout routine.
The part that stood out to me though was the giant Eagle behind him - the symbol for the Oskarshamn hockey team. If he did leave team Eagles for Karlskrona, why is he in a gym with their eagle icon on the wall?
My best guess is that he is in the Karlskrona team, but perhaps had a match against Eagles in Oskarshamn. There was a similar storyline in season 1 where Eagles had a “derby” (definition: a sports match between two rival teams from the same area) against the Tingsryd hockey team.
It’s also possible that Elias came back to Eagles to be closer to his sister - we also need his character at the same place as everybody else since he sort of was a part of the whole Amie/Ludde drama. 
Elias and Amie did have a chemistry that seemed to be leading somewhere before the season 1 cliffhanger. Fans of the show also really want them to get together. There wasn’t a single shot of them together in this teaser trailer but I believe that could be the Eagles team trying to keep it secret and make the audience unsure if it ever will happen. We might see more when the full trailer drops.
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This seems to be Elias fighting with someone else (?) at a party. I’m not sure since this shot was really sudden and dark, but it wouldn’t be a complete shot in the dark to say it’s Elias. He has anger issues and got into fights with Ludde last season, even losing his temper one time during hockey practice and flying at Ludde. 
Now as for the other guy... I don’t know why Tobias keeps popping into my head. Maybe it’s the shirt. Tobias appeared in season 1, episode 2 and was introduced as Ludde’s friend who was in the school band with Ludde’s older brother Andreas.
I don’t know, I might be completely wrong about this one so I’d love to hear what you guys think.
There’s one last shot I haven’t mentioned yet, of Klara nervously looking around a room with a glass (of alcohol?) in her hand. 
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She seems to be at a party but unlike her party girl persona in season 1, she is now unsure and alone. She’s mostly covered up which goes against how she used to dress for parties (her mother even commented on how her shirt showed too much skin before the dinner party with Mats and Leila). 
Klara’s actress mentioned in an interview that we might change our perception of Klara’s character in season 2, so I assume we’ll feel bad for her now that she’s lost her friends and that she’ll get some kind of “mini” redemption arc.
I’ve watched this trailer so many times now that I’m out of things to say, but please send me asks/messages if you’d like to discuss more! I’m sure there are tons of things I’ve missed or haven’t thought of.
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jeawrites · 5 years
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RD AU Draft: 1
(Considering this a draft because its unedited and I haven’t added everything in yet- but feel free to read it! The finished part will most likely be uploaded on ao3 but I’ll be sure to post a link to it on here--) Anthony could remember his years of playing derby clear as day. He could remember the fun he had, the friends he made, and the genuine experience of being part of a team that helped him become who he was now. He wanted nothing more than to help others find that experience, especially his friends now.
But, Tyler was difficult to convince.
“I’m telling you Tyler, it’s a great idea! Think about it- you’ll get to hit people and roller skate! It’s, like, two of your favorite things!” he encouraged while grabbing a pair of skates from the shelf. “Plus- then you have a reason to own a pair of your own skates,” he added as he examined the pair and then put them in front of the tall male on the other side of the counter.
Tyler rolled his eyes a bit and grabbed the pair, putting down two dollars on the counter and shrugging. “I don’t think It’s as good as it sounds,” he responded, “Plus ain’t it a girl’s sport?” Anthony shook his head. “Hell no! Its an anybody sport! I played it,” he stated proudly. “Even more reason to believe its a girls sport-” he laughed as he got a gentle smack to the arm. “Come on, please? Just come watch a bout, just one. I promise you’ll change your mind.”
The silence from the other told Anthony he was considering it, which made him happy. He got even happier when he heard the sigh. “Fine. One bout, but if I don’t like it we’re never discussing this again. Deal?”
“Deal!”
“But… There is one more thing,” he mumbled. He sent him a look, more of a glare than anything, and sighed again. “What?” he asked. “I need you to help me convince Evan to go too.” A groan left Tyler and he turned his head to glance around, spotting the mentioned man at the concessions counter. “No,” he looked to Anthony, plead in his voice. “Look, I love Evan, he’s probably one of my closest friends, after you, but he is the worst person to convince into doing things,” he complained. “Oh come on, Tyler. I already talked to him about joining- I just need you to help me convince him into actually watching a bout.”
“No.”
“Please?”
“No-”
“I’ll give you a free snack coupon!”
Tyler begrudgingly followed Anthony over to where Evan was sitting. His arms crossed and the Canadian look up right in time to see them. “Ah! Bout time you made it, Ty, I was starting to get worried,” he laughed softly. “Worried about what? Some idiot kidnapped me?” he joked back, and Evan rolled his eyes. “No, that you somehow made a new friend to hangout with,” he fired and Anthony snickered as Tyler fought back a smile to try and look offended. Then, he sat down across from Evan at the table and Anthony sat by Tyler. “Who you got on the counter?” Evan asked, not looking back and instead focusing on tying his skates. “Janet,” Anthony answered back, “She’s pretty mad about it.”
Evan chuckled and nodded a small bit before sitting up straight and grabbing his drink. “So, what’d you need, Anthony? You don’t usually leave your work just to talk, at least when its so busy,” he pointed out. “I want you to go to a bout with me and Tyler,” he stated, not wasting time. Evan blinked. “A bout?” he asked. “A derby game,” Anthony corrected, after realizing that the other wouldn’t know what a bout was. “Oh,” he mumbled, messing with the straw in his cup before he nodded some. “Is this about you wanting me to join that team your making?” he followed up. Anthony nodded firmly. “Yeah! I already got Tyler to say maybe!”
Evan glanced from Tyler to Anthony, his brows furrowing as he took a sip from his drink and signaled for him to keep talking. “Come on, Evan, think about it,” Anthony edged, “You get to hit people and go fast in a circle- its kinda like hockey!” The Canadian then huffed after he swallowed. “I’m not telling you again- it's nothing like hockey,” he pointed out and then glanced off. “But… I guess I can go to one game with you two and check it out,” he decided, nodding to confirm it. “Only on one condition, though” he quickly added. Anthony nodded, already celebrating getting Evan to agree; “Yes, anything!” Evan chuckled and looked at Tyler. “Ty’s gotta wear an outfit I choose for him at the game.”
Tyler’s face paled and he glared, already knowing the outfit he was talking about. “No.”
Anthony blinked, confusion washing over his face as he glanced to Tyler, and then Evan. “What?” he asked.
“Ty’s gotta wear an outfit I want him to wear at the game,” he repeated, not breaking eyecontact with Tyler, his grin widening. “No- Anthony, come on! Don’t let him do that- we can get someone else!” he pleaded. Anthony looked between the two again before his gaze just focused on Tyler. “Come on Tyler,” he mumbled, nudging him gently. “Why don’t you just do what he wants?” Tyler glared at him. “No! Cause I know what he wants and he is not getting it!”
--
Tyler couldn’t believe he was letting Evan choose what he wore. He stared at Evan as he rummaged through his closet excitedly, looking for one specific box Tyler knew he had and hated it. “Why do you even keep it?” he asked. “It’s stupid,” he added in a grumble. Evan paused, taking a moment to look back at him with a grin. “It was a gift to you, and if you aren’t going to keep it, I am.”
He turned and Tyler fell silent, though his thoughts were basically loud enough for Evan to hear.
Finally, Evan grinned and pulled out a large box. It had taken some moving of things and random objects, but here it was. He moved to the bed and placed it down happily, letting Tyler reluctantly open it and groan at the sight. “Well? Hurry up and change! Anthony will be here any minute,” Evan chuckled and moved to leave the room.
Looking at the clothes in the box, Tyler sighed and got started. He took a hat off the top and placed it onto the bed. The hat was stupid, it had supidly large, blue cat ears on it that made Tyler cringe. Then, he pulled out a shirt. It was hot pink and had a paw print design on it. There was also a pair of hot pink pants with a similar design to match.
Then, to top it all off was a jacket with a realistic print of a cat's body.
He was going to look fucking rediculoud.
He hated his life too much sometimes.
Regardless, he changed into the clothes and walked out of the room, fighting back his embarrassment. Though, it all returned when he got to the living room and Evan saw him nearly immediately.
“Oh my god-” the Canadian snickered and then laughed, bringing a hand to cover his mouth. “You look so-so,” he couldn’t get the words out. Tyler rolled his eyes and flipped him off. “Whatever, fuck you.”
--
Anthony had, had a similar reaction to Evan’s, but he got over it quickly in place of his own excitement.
The entire trip to the skate park was about how much they were going to enjoy the bout, how much fun they were going to have. Even after they had gotten inside and seated it was still just him blabbering on.
“They’re so-so cool! I promise you’ll both enjoy this and-”
Tyler put his hand on Anthony’s mouth. “Okay, we get it. Calm down, dude,” he mumbled. After getting a nod, he removed his hand. Then, he jumped in his seat after hearing a voice. “Tyler?” he turned his head, fear raising in hm. More people he knew meant more people not letting him live down the fact he wore this outfit, meaning more jokes, meaning- wait.
“Luke?” he asked, snickering.
The man infront of him grinned and crossed his arms. “The one and only,” he chuckled. “What’re you doin’ here? I didn’t know you liked derby,” he asked, curious. Tyler shrugged. “I don’t know if I do. My friend dragged me out here to watch. What are you doing here and-” he giggled, “With bunny ears?” Luke blinked and then chuckled. “These?” he gestured up, “Aren’t mine. I stole them from Ryan. He came with me this time, I usually regular the bouts.”
“No way is Ryan here,” he spoke, genuinely surprised. “Oh, yeah. It's his first time to one of these too,” he explained, “I wanted to get him introduced to a new sport.” Tyler nodded, and glanced over to his friends, who were both sort of looking at him in confusion. “Oh, right. Luke,” he looked at him again, smiling some, “This is Evan and Anthony, my friends. You and Ryan should come sit with us.” Luke smiled at the other two, getting polite smiles in turn. “Sounds great!” he agreed. “I’ll go find, Ry and tell him we’re over here,” he added and turned to walk away.
Anthony grew more excited for the bout.
--
“Keep going!” Tyler shouted, watching as the girl quickly moved her way out of the group and onto the turn. The crowd cheered excitedly as well. “Yeah! You kick their asses, AnnihilateHer!” he shouted, gripping the edge of his seat. He was having a better time then he thought he would.
Evan watched the girl quickly move her way around one that tried to stop her, his eyes wide in amazement and his smile wide. “Good job!” he shouted, hoping his encouragement would reach her as she sped a corner.
Tyler watched her with careful eyes and then he glared at the ref who called her, managing to hear it was a backblock- like the eighth one called to night (not on just her). “She wasn’t anywhere near her back! Open your fucking eyes!” he yelled at the ref and he kicked the wall in front of him. That was about the seventh time he’s done that.
Anthony laughed gently. He was glad his friends were enjoying themselves. “I told you both you’d like it,” he teased as the jam ended. Tyler looked at him, his eyes wide and his grin crazily wide. “Dude this is sick! It’s so fucking cool- I can’t believe they’d allow a sport like this,” he laughed. “It’s wild,” he chuckled. “You’re wild,” Evan snickered, “You’ve kicked that wall several times, and I think you’re voice is loud enough the refs hear you the last few times. Control yourself,” he teased and got a punch to the arm in turn. “Shut up and let me have this,” he stated, but there wasn’t any spite or sarcasm, he was still smiling and having a good time. This was fun!
He looked to Ryan and Luke, who were in a similar state, though Luke was calmer due to having seen this all live so many times.
“And she just slammed into her-” Ryan exclaimed, hands flailing as he tried to explain. “Yeah, I know, Ry. I saw it,” Luke laughed softly and he looked at him with wide eyes full of awe. “They didn’t flinch, Luke! That’s amazing! This is really cool-” he looked to the track as a new pack formed. “Can you imagine if I did that?”
Anthony’s head turned to Ryan quickly at that. “You can,” he answered him. Ryan paused and looked back, curiosity in his eyes. “What?” he asked. “You can totally do that. In fact, I’m making a men’s team- if you want to play,” he offered and Ryan stared before grinning wide. “Maybe, I’ll think about it.”
“I’ll do it,” Luke followed, gaining eyes. “I’ll totally play for your team. You should too, Ry,” he looked at him, smiling. “It’ll be fun!”
Tyler looked at Ryan, nodding. “I was the first to join, can confirm it's very fun-” “You didn’t want to join,” Anthony cut in and Tyler looked at him with a glare. “I was the first you asked which makes me first to join,” he stuck his tongue out at him, and Anthony stuck his out in turn before they both chuckled. “I was second to join then!” Evan declared, snickering.
Luke looked at Ryan as he spoke. “I was third. You wanna be fourth Ry? You wanna do what those awesome girls are doin?” he asked, encouraging him to join. Ryan bit his lip lightly, thinking it over before he nodded. “Yeah… Yeah! I do! I wanna do that shit too! Consider me on the team! Whenever it's actually made anyways,” he grinned.
Anthony couldn’t believe his team was actually beginning to form.
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Tagged by: @maso-xchrist 😘😘
1.) Are you named after anyone?
No, I was told that my mom was watching the discovery channel, and while they were describing the color of lion's eyes that's where she got it from. Amber.
2.) When was the last time you cried?
January 1st. When I officially moved away and my bestfriend was hugging me at the airport. That was actually the first time she's cried in front of me in 8 years ( like she's shed a couple tears before, but this was an ugly cry) so yeah I lost my shit
3.) Do you want/have kids?
Well, as much as I love to overshare this is one thing I stay EXTREMELY private about. But yes, I have a son. His name is Jude. You wont see me post about him on here probably ever. I'd want 2 more, but not anytime soon.
4.) Do you use sarcasm a lot?
It's my nature, right next to my passive aggressiveness. Probably why people don't see me as approachable (I'm nice I swear)
5.) What's the first thing you notice about people?
They way they treat others or how they carry themselves. I've always been able to tell whether or not I'm gonna like someone based off first impressions. If I you rub me the wrong way upon meeting, there's no changing how I feel about you 🤷‍♀️
6.) What's your eye color?
Whiskey brown.
7.) Scary movie or happy ending?
I'm a sucker for both. I fucking LIVE for a good horror flick. But my inner chic loves me some cute happy endings
8.) Any special talents?
I sing really good. I'm fantastic at looking like a bitch. I can make myself sad in under a second. Talent man.
9.) Where were you born?
Sioux City IA. I do not recommend it to anyone.
10.) What are your hobbies?
Besides shitposting? Singing, I'm honestly pretty boring so not much at the moment, reading?
11.) Do you have any pets?
Yes, a black cat. Salem. 3 going on 4 yrs old. We actually share birthdays. He's a lovable prick. Loathes tf outta my son. But they manage. He's got crooked paws so he looks a little goofy but he's a sweetheart when he wants to be.
12.) What sports do you play/have you played?
😂😂🤣😂🤣 I am not a sports person. Though roller derby looks awesome and I love floor hockey if that counts
13.) How tall are you?
5'4 out of all my sisters, that's actually the tallest.
14.) Favorite subject in school?
Choir and math. Never understood how people didn't get math, it was very easy for me. Only classes I ever got straight A's in. ( even in my drug addiction years)
15.) Dream job?
Unrealistic: Broadway or some sort of performance ( a girl can dream)
Less unrealistic: paralegal don't ask why
Tagging: @ghostiesbedroom idk who else to tag but go for it !!
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xwitches-gardenx · 3 years
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Haven't done one of these in years!
01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? I have a very good relationship with both of my parents
02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? My mum in hospital last night, when we were finally allowed to see her for 30 minutes after waiting 8 hours to even find out if she was alive.
03: Do you regret anything? I regret a lot of things. I'm my own worst critic. My biggest is probably that my mum probably won't be around to ever see me get married.
04: Are you insecure? Depends what about. Certain things. Yes
05: What is your relationship status? 100% single
06: How do you want to die? By book avalanche. It would just be incredibly ironic and exactly to my humour
07: What did you last eat? I can't actually remember :/. Oh egg mayo sandwiches
08: Played any sports? I did use to play yet. Netball, Hockey, Basketball and Athletics
09: Do you bite your nails? Yes, very bad habit of mine
10: When was your last physical fight? Years ago when I was at uni in Derby and this girl I hated who always had to be the centre of attention kept picking on me after my ex and I split up. She'd leave really nasty comments about me on his Myspace wall (lol remember that). She turned up at the same club as me so I punched her.
11: Do you like someone? Nope
12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? Pretty much since yesterday and today
13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? No
14: Do you miss someone? Yes my mum. I don't know when I'll get to see her in hospital again because of Covid restrictions
15: Have any pets? Not personally, but we have a family dog and cat
16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Anxious, uncertain, drained...mildly hopeful and numb
17: Ever made out in the bathroom? Home bathroom yes. Not out anywhere
18: Are you scared of spiders? Depends what size they are and if they're those fat fuckers or the skinny ones
19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? Can't think of anyone off the top of my head
20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Snogged? What are we? 11. Probably a year ago
21: What are your plans for this weekend? I have no idea. I literally live my life day to day
22: Do you want to have kids? How many? No and 0
23: Do you have piercings? How many? Yes. I only have 5 now.
24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? English and any Creative subject
25: Do you miss anyone from your past? I miss alot of people from my past
26: What are you craving right now? Something to eat but I dont know what
27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? Probably
28: Have you ever been cheated on? yes
29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? yes
30: What’s irritating you right now? Coronavirus, because I cant see my mum
31: Does somebody love you? My parents??
32: What is your favourite color? Silver (?) dark blue
33: Do you have trust issues? To some extent because of how I've been treated in the past
34: Who/what was your last dream about? Shannon Leto :') (that's all I'm saying)
35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? My dad and a doctor
36: Do you give out second chances too easily? Not sure
37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? Forget
38: Is this year the best year of your life? No. Literally my worst
39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 18
40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? No
51: Favourite food? italian
52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Definitely. I've come to realise that more and more over the years
53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Cried? I didnt really sleep
54: Is cheating ever okay? No
55: Are you mean? Can be, if someone deserves it
56: How many people have you fist fought? 1
57: Do you believe in true love? I'd like to think so, but from my experiences....it's unlikely
58: Favourite weather? When its warm and windy
59: Do you like the snow? Not as much as a kid, but yes.
60: Do you wanna get married? Yes
61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? In private, not in public
62: What makes you happy? 30stm and books??
63: Would you change your name? No
64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? Yes coz I dont even talk to him anymore
65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Well it would depend how I felt about him. If i didnt have feelings for him, would have to tell him. If I liked him I'd discuss it with him and maybe give it a go
66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? yes
67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? My dad??
68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? My dad and a doctor last night
69: Do you believe in soulmates? I like the notion of it. Whether it personally happens to me....no idea
70: Is there anyone you would die for? Yes.
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Kent Parson and the Comeback Kid - 3
After a week of Kent Parson breaking everybody's hearts I was like I AM GONNA WRITE SOMETHING FLUFFY FOR HIM IF IT KILLS ME. And tonight I wrote 6k in four hours? Which is an amazing omen for the new year, may it prove so in the future?
So this is a new chapter of Kent Parson and the Comeback Kid. It's 2021. Kent's finally gotten Andy from Leave Your Lovers Like Campsites to settle down and have a kid and marry him. They've got an open relationship and he's got boyfriends who don't appear in this fic so far; she's dating Maida Hombrebueno. Andy, who was an elite hockey player in her youth, was out of the sport for many years and just got rediscovered as a talent. She's 32 and just qualified for the US National Women's Team for the first time. Also, it's Round 3 of the Stanley Cup playoffs, and the Aces are up in the series 3-2.
(There's one little sour moment where Andy's dad is mentioned, and general BS of the media being gross, but nothing like the last part. And for people who're wondering: Katie is Kent's sister.)
At the airport, Nick jumped down and ran for her as soon as he got a clear eyeline. He almost got taken out by a luggage cart before getting within ten feet of her, and Andy sent thanks with her eye contact as the man stopped and let Nick blithely swerve around him.
"Mommy! Mommy!" he exclaimed, as she scooped him up. "What did you bring me?"
Andy laughed and rocked him back and forth, pressing her cheek to his hair. "Hey kiddo," she said, heart thudding. "I am so happy to see you. I brought you... a giant kiss. You gonna let me give you a big kiss hello?"
He did, pressing his hand over his cheek afterwards to hold it there. "I'm in pull-ups," he informed her glumly as she walked across the Arrivals area with him on her hip.
"Yeah? You peed yourself a little? Happens to the best of us, buddy," she said, tightening the arm around Nick so she could lift her other one and reel in her girlfriend.
A few years back, Andy ended her twentieth hockey season in a rec league in Minneapolis and hung up her ice skates in frustration. Half her team were skating for their first season ever, and were carried along by the half who'd been playing since they were little girls. They made great drinking buddies, but she hadn't been going anywhere as an athlete, and felt a little burned out by having to coach in her rec time over and above her day job coaching teenagers at a hockey academy.
Roller derby gave her a lot of the same things as hockey. It was fast and fun and violent, and played by women who made her laugh so hard she snorted beer out of her nose. But the player base had a deeply different ethos, embracing the weird and wonderful instead of hockey's straighter laces. When Maida Hombrebueno joined the Sin City Derby Girls, it was the first time she'd willingly participated in a team sport since the age of ten, and Andy might never have met her without it.
Maida spent her summers touring music festivals and New Age gatherings with her boyfriend Luis, a Santeria-practicing guitar player. When she wasn't rehabilitating injured wild raptors, Maida's own interests ran to composing slam poetry in indigenous Mexican languages and occult divination.
She was like water in the desert.
Once Andy got over her sense of disorientation with Maida, the feeling of being so far from any familiar cultural referents she didn't know where she was, she found herself at home. Maida was the teammate she trusted to have her back, the witch who poured blessings on her son's head. As a lover, she was like a stray cat who just walked into Andy's house one day and treated her bed like home, filling up her house with warmth and wisdom. When she left, it was on her own time and for her own reasons, but also the certainty that she'd be back. Maida was the only person Andy would trust to take her two-year-old son to the airport and let him wander freely, risking life and limb in the face of baggage carts and many other unknown horrors. Maida treated Nick with a calm, hands-off attentiveness, knew where he was every second, and could--unlike his grandmother--call him back at any minute.
Maida squeezed her in a hug, and Andy breathed in the jasmine perfume behind Maida's ears, pressing her face into Maida's hair for a minute before letting go.
"Congratulations," Maida said, and twined her fingers with Andy's as they began walking out to the parking lot.
We'll just do the long-distance thing, she'd said even before Andy left for the selection camp. No drama, no questions. Unless you don't want to. But you do what you need.
"Thanks." Andy squeezed her hand. "You coming to the game tonight?"
"Oh, no," Maida said. "You guys have fun. I'll go home when you guys head out."
Andy shook her head, smiling. Kent's friendship with Maida went back almost as many years as he'd known Andy, when he'd started exploring Paganism, and had been lovers with Maida and Luis for years; when he drove out of Las Vegas to their trailer in the desert, it was to escape hockey, to escape being Kent Parson, to escape even the memory of the pressures laid on him in the city. So even after all these years, they never went to Kent's games. Maida might acknowledge that Andy played hockey, but politely treated Kent's hockey career like a hobby that paled in comparison to everything else about him. She'd rather talk to him about music, xeriscaping, statistics, about the progress of Nick's potty-training, than let discussion of hockey pass her lips in his presence. "Series is 3-2 us," she said, just to fill Maida in. "Either they win conference finals and advance to the Cup final tonight, or it goes to another game."
"Karen's been trying to pack when she thinks Kent won't see," Maida said with dry humour. Kent and Andy were hockey-player superstitious, made uncomfortable by words or actions that implied their teams would win; Maida was idiosyncratically superstitious, more likely to believe fate was affected by the phase of the moon and the rains last winter than human actions; Karen didn't think she was superstitious at all, and liked to be well-prepared ahead of time. Karen therefore struggled to reconcile her son's habits and her household management, especially during Playoffs. In her opinion, a week's warning was hardly enough for her to prepare to take Nick to New England so they could be there at the game if Kent won, and the shuttling back and forth between home games and away was a demonic plan specifically designed to torment her. Over the past week Maida had probably been surreptitiously keeping friction between mother and son from erupting, when she wasn't tending to her birds.
"Grandma's gonna be so happy when Playoffs are over," Andy chirped to Nick, who had his arms around her neck and his head against his shoulder. To Maida she asked, "Where's Kent napping?"
"Swoops's," Maida answered. She reached over and rubbed Nick's back as they got to the car. "Though this one's not going to be too loud, I think. He was up at six this morning. Be nice if he could--" she mouthed the word nap-- "this afternoon."
"Mmm," Andy agreed, depositing Nick in his carseat. He clung to her, his eyelids drooping. She was already calculating the probability that he'd fall asleep in the car and stay asleep while she carried him inside.
The odds weren't great, but a girl could hope. It made sense that Kent Parson's son would be a stubborn little motherfucker, though.
"Kent wants to see you before puck drop," Karen said, as Nick dragged Andy by the hand. His eyes had snapped open just as Andy laid him down on his bed, damnit.
"I know," Andy said, as she retreated down the hall. "He texted me." And then she waved as Nick pulled her into the playroom.
She had to admit, privately, that she didn't always understand her son. His noises didn't always resolve into words in her ears, and she frequently relied on Kent and Karen for translation. She didn't understand why he wanted to do something with a train and a Barbie and a spaceship, and just patiently held the spaceship aloft for him until he took it out of her hands and set it to rest on a toy car. She never knew what his scribbles or Play-doh blobs were supposed to represent, and found herself falling back on phrases like, "That's a lot of blue!"
And yet, when she sat back on her heels and Maida brought her a cup of tea and a kiss goodbye, she said, "I've decided? I think I actually am a better parent than my parents were."
"Yeah," Maida said, and squeezed her shoulder. "Karen wanted me to remind you that you've only got two hours before the team goes in for strategy."
"Yeah, I know. I'll get dressed soon." Andy squeezed Maida's hand, and kissed it. "Drive safe."
Kent and Andy had an entire closet for jerseys. It was sentimental and a bit ridiculous, but there it was. Some jerseys got special treatment; his first Olympic jersey, framed with team picture and silver medal, hung in his den. One of her NCAA jerseys, and the award plaque she won that season, had the same treatment in her work office. But after a while there got to be so many--and not all fit for public display, like the All-Star jersey from a few years back with bloodstains on one side and a little penis drawn on the other in Sharpie. This was where her new Team USA jersey went when she pulled it out of its plastic wrapping, buried her nose in the fabric, and then slipped it onto a hanger.
Her chin trembled a little when she indulged in a whim and pulled out one of Kent's IIHF Worlds jerseys. It wasn't the same--different year, old logo, different neck decoration. But both jerseys were the same colour. Same team. PARSON, across one back. SCARLATTI, across the other.
She put them back in the closet and sighed wistfully. There used to be a time when she'd just throw one of them on over a pair of jeans and sit down in the stands with a hot dog and a beer. It was comfortable and familiar. She still did it for a lot of games and tournaments, but not NHL games, especially not Aces games, anymore. Instead she put her curling iron on to heat and stepped into the shower.
Kent didn't care what she wore. Or, that was, when his opinion was a deciding factor he preferred her in a jersey as God intended her. But he was a player, not a fat woman being spectated as a spectator. His fashion choices during a game didn't get dissected the way hers did. When she wore a jersey, his Twitter mentions didn't fill up with messages about her looking ugly and slovenly the way hers did. He didn't have bosses in the Aces Foundation making nervous comments about "professional attire" and "media image" the way she did. So when he was around he didn't comment on it, just helped her pull her Spanx on and zipped up her dresses.
Almost over, she consoled herself, blending her makeup.
Even the lower passages and back hallways of the arena sparked with life. This was an important game, and Las Vegas knew it. Andy waved to familiar faces--parking lot attendants, security guards, janitors in her husband's jersey. As she came down the tunnel the boom of the music playing hit her before the scrape of skates and smack of sticks did.
Jorge, the towel boy, nodded to her as she came down to the players' box, but the coaches and trainer there--Harry, Mel, and Luc--were too busy watching the ice with eagle eyes and conferring over their notes. The box was otherwise empty as the team warmed up. Andy went to lean on the boards and look out.
Swoops was still wearing fairy wings pinned to the back of his jersey, the way he had at warmups for the last three games. It was a bet Andy didn't fully understand. Dmytro was lying on his back and cycling his legs through the air, pretending that his jersey totally accidentally fell back and exposed his abs. Gordie's glove hand was still moving a little slowly when he windmilled, and therefore unsurprisingly, the backup kid they'd called up last night was nervously stretching on an empty patch of ice.
Kent was--
Kent skated away from a consultation with a rookie, snatched a puck, handled it over to the lineup to shoot on Gordie. Kent kept drawing her eye, and not just because he was hers. Kent was--
His jersey was missing the Nevada patch on the shoulder, the extra stripe of white at the bottom. Its sleeves were straight, not shaped the way they'd been for the last three years. The sides didn't have the subtly greyer panel the Aces were wearing this season. It looked retro, and it hung on him a little looser than normal, and there were what looked like scuff marks all over it, and--
SCARLATTI, it said. 14
Kent sank the puck over Gordie's glove, shook his head sympathetically, looked over to the callup kid, who looked like he was about to puke. Kent was on his way over to him when he noticed Andy.
Almost a decade ago she'd slept with him for the two weeks between conference finals and Cup final, slept with him a few times after, and then kissed him goodbye and moved back to Minnesota for four years. As a parting gift, he'd asked the team shop to custom make a jersey with her name and habitual number, to remember her year with the Aces by. A lot of the guys had signed it for her.
He'd felt self-conscious about giving her his own number and didn't want him wearing anybody else's, he'd said. But she'd always hugged a secret little hope to her chest when she wore it: that he put her own number on it because he took her a little seriously as a hockey player.
"You stole my jersey," she said through tears when he skated up.
He just grinned and wrapped her up in a hug over the boards, murmuring thanks when Jorge took the stick out of his hand. She hugged him back and gripped big handfuls of the fabric.
"I am so proud of you," he said. "You're gonna get everything you need to play. We're gonna figure it out."
"I'm wearing mascara, you asshole," she sobbed. He let her go so she could turn away and grab one of the bench tissues and turn back to him while she was crying. "I did actually know that."
"You... did?" the man wearing her jersey asked.
"I know, right?" she asked, blowing her nose. "On the plane back I just thought... you didn't actually say, but I just thought. If I made the team, and you were like, no, we can't make it work, your career is more important, after you told me to go? I'd be so fucking angry with you. You'd be an asshole." She sniffed mightily and swabbed at her face. She'd been smart; she'd used waterproof mascara, though she hadn't remembered it at first. "So it turns out I actually have, like. Expectations? And I..." she started crying again. "I actually believed you were gonna believe in me and support me? Even before you said so?"
"Babe," he said, and gathered her in again reverently. She leaned against his chest, holding tissues to her face, even when she felt him slide back on his skates and have to re-set his feet. She thought about the fact that their entire exchange had just been videotaped and clips of it had probably already been broadcast, but wasn't too troubled. Kent was shielding her; her face was safely hidden in his shoulder, and the jersey he'd chosen to warm up in told the story itself. Maybe he'd anticipated that. The media were going to want visuals to go with the story, and there had already been stories about the surprise addition to the roster before she boarded the plane back to Las Vegas. He'd already known they'd have to present an image as a team.
They just moved to the side for the first guy who came skating back to the bench, so he could step around Kent, but when it became clear this was a general exodus Andy sighed and straightened up and Kent let her go.
"I love you," he said.
She set her hands on his chest, gripping her jersey, and thumped him a little. "You make me proud tonight. Yeah?"
"Yeah," he said, touched her chin, and she let him go.
Andy blotted her eyes with a paper towel soaked in cold water, and then when she got up to the family box she looked for Valentyna. It was a lively box tonight--all the wives, most of the girlfriends, the callup goalie kid's parents, various friends and hangers-on. Nick and Karen weren't there yet, but Oksana and a couple other kids had pulled out the big Rubbermaid bin of Duplo from behind the bar and started playing with it already.
It took one look--it looked like Valentyna had been waiting for her--before Dmytro's wife was pulling out her glass makeup case and coming up to one of the tables in the back of the box. She adjusted the overhead light to shine on Andy's face, frowning at its inadequacies as Andy meekly sat on one of the tall stools.
"You TV interview?" Valentyna asked, snapping open her case. Before her marriage she'd been a model in Kiev, and worked as a makeup artist when she couldn't get modelling gigs. (Somehow, Ukraine had hundreds of women more beautiful than Valentyna Mykhailuk) She was normally shy around the other Aces wives, partly because of the language barrier, but their children were friends only six months apart, and watching Andy struggle with makeup alone had pushed her past her limits. Before the big games, Andy had to pass Valentyna's inspection before being allowed out to the front of the box.
"No," Andy said, squirming a little. "And no big eyeliner wings, Valentyna."
"Accentuates face," Valentyna said. "National team! Patriotic hero! Ought to interview you."
"My face," Andy said. "My eyeliner." And then, as Valentyna loaded up a brush: "Thank you."
"Will miss you," Valentyna said matter-of-factly, and then had to pause to let Andy wipe away tears again.
She got one interview that night, as it turned out, as well as going down into the stands because a group of girls had hastily written on the back of their posterboard sign, ANDY SCARLATTI COME SIGN MY JERSEY. They played on a U18 team together in Ontario, and got playoff tickets as part of what they described as "the most amazing vacation ever." Then she hustled back up to the press box.
Sam Park was the veteran holding down the Las Vegas Star's sports reporting, which meant he bounced from NHL and WNBA games and the local Little League games and initiation hockey tournaments Andy's office either organized, oversaw, or sponsored. They'd last texted two weeks ago when she'd given him the name of a good local flooring contractor for his house, and tonight he sent, Willing to come down to the press box and talk as a member of Team USA?
An interview with an old friend like Sam was a good starting place. He liked wordy character pieces more than brief sports reporting, so he listened with interest as she threw a new light on their acquaintance--how she worked with the Aces in 2010 because she'd always known she'd have to get a paid job after her college sports career, and left in 2011 in part because of the lack of local women's hockey; the growth of professional leagues for women, and differences between men and women's hockey. How her office at the Aces foundation being literally a hundred feet from the team's practice ice meant she could go out and skate at lunchtime if she wanted, and how those hours and her time playing keep-away with Kent before the teams she coached showed up were often more player development than other women just as skilled as her could afford.
She kept quiet about her speculation about next season, though Kent had already spoken about it. In an attempt to distract the press during the first intermission from the emotional crisis their new goalie was having in the dressing room, Kent had stepped out for a brief media scrum. When asked how Andy's selection to Team USA would affect his plans for next season, he'd shrugged and clasped his hands behind his back
"We haven't settled on any details, but, y'know, I wanna support my wife," he said. "I've had ten years of support to be the best player I can be, best coaching, best training, on the best team in the best league. So I think, y'know what, fair's fair." Then, having done his best to ensure rumours of his retirement would bump clips of the kid having a panic attack on the bench from the reporting, he'd smiled and slipped back into the dressing room.
Sam was softballing her, probably planning a series of articles if the story generated much interest. He wanted to know about her family, her friends, her new teammates.
"Have you seen this?" he asked, offering her his phone.
Lansing Cougars @mi_girlshockey · 2h So proud of my daughter #AndreaScarlatti for being selected to #USNWT #TeamUSA!
For a minute she smiled, under the assumption that someone running a girls' hockey account in Michigan had hyperbolically claimed her as their daughter. Then she read the sidebar with the account information. The realization that it was the team her dad was coaching now--that it meant "daughter" literally--wiped the smile from her face.
She wanted to snatch the phone up in a typing grip and fire back a response. Fuck you, she wanted to say. You don't get to claim any part in this. I did this despite you. This was exactly the kind of bullshit that made her block her father on Twitter every time she figured out what his new handle was.
Instead she let the impulse pass through her, and when she could, she consciously relaxed her grip on the phone. She put effort into breathing normally, sitting back in her chair, offering the phone back to him. "No comment," she said casually.
How like him, he thought, to name an account after the girls he's coaching and use it as his own personal mouthpiece.
Sam's eyebrows flicked up. "No comment?" he asked. "That's... not like you."
She made sure to take a full breath and double-check her response. What did she want to say? This was Sam, right; Sam who was writing a book about the Aces, Sam who hadn't written a word about Vladimir's breakdown despite witnessing some of it himself. Then she smiled, a little strained. "When I'm ready to talk about that? You're one of the people I'll talk to. But right now I think it's wise to leave him out of the story."
Sam looked a little concerned, like he was going to ask her if she was really okay, but Andy was saved by the airhorn. The game was back on.
When the game was over Andy kissed and hugged her son goodbye, and headed downstairs. Nick was under Valentyna's watchful eye, and would be going home with her, Oksana, and Dmytro tonight. Western Conference Finals, win or lose, were Kent and Andy's date night by very ancient compact. The other guys would tease Dmytro about not wanting to go out and party, but the same way they teased Kent: good-naturedly, and without a real intent to make him change his mind. Andy was grateful to the Mykhailuks and said so. Karen split off in the hallway to party with another group of middle-aged "wine grandmas".
When Kent met her in the hallway to the parking lot, his suit was rumpled and slightly damp with champagne spray. He grinned sheepishly and laced their hands together.
"Good game," she said, kissed his cheek and looked up. "Oh, hey Gordie, good effort. Tough luck. Rest that shoulder, hey?"
"Thanks, Ands," Gordie said, dredging up the ghost of a smile, and shouldered past them. Dmytro came out, his phone in his hand.
Then Valentyna came down one of the staircases with the kids and Nick caught sight of Kent and shrieked, "Daddy!"
"Oh, dear," Andy sighed under her breath, as Kent crouched down to receive Nick in a running hug.
"Daddy won!" Nick said, hugging him. "Good game, Daddy!"
"Yeah," Kent said. "Thank you! You gonna go home with Oksana and have a sleepover?"
"No," Nick said.
"Yeah," Kent encouraged. "You're gonna go home with Valentyna and sleep over at our place, and see me and Mommy next morning."
"Don't wanna," Nick said, and then something low and incomprehensible that Kent listened to with a furrowed brow. He scowled when Kent said something softly back, and then balled up one fist and hit his father's shoulder with it.
"Hey, hey, hey," Kent said. "Hands aren't for hitting. Gentle hands."
"Daddy mean," Nick said accusingly. He stopped to consider his actions, weighing righteous fury against fear of consequences, and hit Kent again with his face screwed up for tears.
This is my fault, Andy thought suddenly. I've been away for a week. He's upset because I've never been gone that long. That's why he's wearing pull-ups. He hasn't tried to pull a stunt like this for months. It's because of me.
Kent sighed, hitching Nick up into a surer grasp, and turned to the side to let a few other players by. He took a minute to rub Nick's back and close his eyes. "I love you, little man," he said, and then, muttered to himself under his breath: "I cannot take away your pain. I can only sit with you and teach you how to feel it." When he opened his eyes again it was to meet Andy's eyes with a wry expression. He jerked his head to Valentyna, and they started walking to the parking lot together.
"I don't know what books they have at Oksana's house," Kent said as they walked. "I wonder what you're gonna read together. You've got Goodnight Moon and I Am Not a Chair with you, you could read those. But you might read one of Oksana's books."
"No," Nick whined, but his strength was fading. He was collapsing into Kent, tiredness replacing anger.
"Which one would you rather read?" Kent kept going with that gentle voice. "Goodnight Moon or I Am Not a Chair?"
"...Chair," Nick conceded, as Kent pulled open the back door to Valentyna's sedan. Nick's car seat was already in it so Kent settled him in, while Oksana climbed into hers on her own. "An' also Goodnight Moon."
"Yeah, you want both books?" Kent looked over to Valentyna as she buckled Oksana in. "Do you think you can read two?"
"I think so," she said, and leaned forward as Kent drew back. "We gonna read two books?"
"Yeah," Nick said softly. "I love you, Daddy."
"Love you too, little man. Night, Oksana."
Andy stood back, watching with a sense of wonder as Kent closed the car door. He came back to join her with a crooked smile, and they started walking to their car in the other direction as Dmytro started his sedan. They glanced back to watch it reverse out, then drive away.
"I thought we were seriously done for," Andy said, taking Kent's hand. "How did you do that?"
"I mighta let him come back with us, to be honest," he said. "Even though we've got stuff to talk about. He missed you. Coulda put him to bed first. But then he hit me, and we talked last week about how hitting never gets him what he wants." He slipped into the passenger seat of the car, and resumed once he and Andy had their seatbelts on. "I think as soon as he hit me, he knew it was over. I was gonna have to make a stand. So then he gave in pretty fast."
Andy sighed. "I feel so bad. He was probably more upset because I was away."
Kent rolled his head against his headrest to look over at her. "Babe? Welcome to how I feel all the time."
Their drive home was quiet, nerves on her part and pleasant weariness on his. Because they were old, they changed out of their nice clothes as soon as they got in the door and changed into pyjamas. Kent fed the animals and poured a drink out onto his altar to the gods of luck, then stretched out his legs on the couch so Kit Purrson could have the seat she was actively agitating for. Andy brought him a cold pack for his knee first, and then the homemade pizza the oven had been programmed to have ready for them when they got home, and finally two glasses of rosé. She'd sat down when he said, "I wanna see your jersey," and then she had to get up again.
"Sorry," he said when she came back, taking her hand and kissing it. She let him, and then handed the jersey over and picked up her wine.
"Shit," he said after a minute. He was tracing the number on the sleeve.
"They, uh," she said nervously, twisting her wedding ring. "It got us to list three jersey numbers by preference, and then they got assigned based on seniority. And there's a lot of competition for the lower numbers, and Bri's played under number fourteen forever, so I..."
"Dude." Kent looked up at her, eyes shining, hands still gripping the 90. "You're wearing my number. It's not even your birth year."
"Fair's fair," she finally got out past her tongue.
Then she had to lean forward so he could kiss her, and they both cried a little bit, and then it seemed like they were really talking about how to do this.
"I'm afraid," she said. "I'm afraid like, you'll organize some big trade to another team, and we'll change our whole lives, and move everyone, and then I'll get cut from the team in October." She made a little cutting gesture with her hands. "Whoops! I thought I had a career, but I don't."
"It'd still be worth it," he said. "Even just having that chance."
Andy reached back and wrapped her hands around the nape of her neck. "It would be so fucking embarrassing. It's not us, it's the fucking commentators. They're just..." She rubbed her face. "I don't want to do something we're gonna regret, or that you're gonna resent me for, in case it doesn't work out."
"Okay," he said, like that was easy. "What are our options?"
"I mean like, technically..." she laughed nervously, picking up a pizza crust. "I still have one year of NCAA eligibility, I think? But I mean, that's not..."
"Yeah, no," he agreed, stroking his cat.
"If it were an Olympic year..." she paused. "Well I mean, I wouldn't get on in an Olympic year, because it's just that much more intense. But then the players take the whole season to build together. Whereas now there's a training camp, and then everybody's off to their regular team until the 4 Nations Cup. So unless I wanna stick around here and keep training with you... The N, the C-dub, the Russians, or China. I mean, I could play in Minnesota, but..."
"Everything we're hearing from Patty says their league might not last the year," Kent agreed. "And you might not wanna be around for the implosion."
"Yeah," she agreed. "As nice as it would be to be home. So. Realistically? Um. Because, all of the NWHL teams have expressed interest in me. But then it's like, the two body problem. Boston can't afford you. The Sabres aren't a good team right now. Connecticut doesn't have a team at all so then you're commuting, or I am. And you..." she trailed off when he lifted a hand, asking to jump in.
"I want to retire," Kent said.
She blinked at him, and then reassembled her face into something empathetic and supportive and ate her pizza crust. He smiled and poked her knee with his toes, because he liked to make fun of her Listening Face.
"I might as well admit it," he said. "I did this season out of spite. When I came back after my paternity year, people were just... so shitty. Everything they said or did was like, 'Oh, losing his edge.' By the end of the year I was so pissed I just... didn't want to prove them right with that shitty season. So I came back." His face twisted. "And now Nick has nightmares where I'm dead."
"Honey," Andy said. "He hasn't had those for..."
"Okay, but he did," Kent said. "And I'm just... wondering how many more seasons I might've put him through if I hadn't got that far. But now I'm here, and it's..."
Andy reached out and squeezed his foot while he searched for words, and then topped up his wineglass.
"There's this art studio in Rochester," Kent said. "It's in the building where Katie works. It's like, a family creative space. Child-led play. You take your kid in and there's all these art materials around, and the person teaches you how to make like, a popsicle stick picture or fingerpaints or whatever. But the point isn't the art, it's like... teaching your child to explore. How to let them be creative while you're there supporting them but not smothering or anything. She sends me snapchats about it. I wanna go there."
Andy started on her second crust, puzzled but willing to hear him out.
"I just hate how like... all of my time with him is chopped up and scheduled and he's always tired and we can never just be together. After the summers it's almost worse because then he's used to me being around and he's like, 'Where did Daddy go?' What I want is the time to just wake up and decide we're gonna fingerpaint today, and he never has to worry about when I'm gonna leave."
"You wanna be a stay-at-home dad again," Andy said slowly.
Kent paused to think about that, and then looked at her again with something almost fervent. "There's been so many times since he was born that I've been on the ice and asked myself, 'What the hell am I doing here? I've got important things I need to do!' It's like... being around Nick feels important in a way hockey hasn't in years. Even when he's just sleeping. Something changes about him every day, and I love being able to catch it. It kills me every time Mom has to send me a video of something he learned to do without me."
"Shit," Andy said. "I thought you were doing okay."
Kent shrugged, a little helplessly. "I think I repressed a lot. But also like, he's just gotten so interesting now. He's inventing stuff and coming up with ideas, and more and more I'm like, I don't wanna miss this. I wanna be there for this. I wanna get to know him." He picked at his nails and looked up at her. "I spent all these years wishing I had people who loved me, who took care of me, who needed me. And now I've finally got you and under all the competition there's a little bit of me that's like, fuck, why can't I rest on my laurels? Why do I have to get another season out like I'm wringing out a dishrag?" He rolled his head back and sighed. "I am so fucking glad we won tonight, because that might be the only way I'm brave enough to say this."
Andy wasn't good at accepting the fact that Kent loved her. It was like she was coated with an impermeable resin, and that love only seeped in when it cracked and flaked with age. But she didn't think it was just that difficulty that left her feeling that Kent's love for Nick was so much deeper than his love for her.
She wasn't jealous. It wasn't a competition. In some ways it felt like how the world ought to be. It was just a kind of realization: If Kent and I divorced, he'd hurt a lot, but then he'd live again. If he lost Nick, he'd never recover. The immensity of that secondhand love was so deep that it threatened to overwhelm her, and she was kind of humbled just to witness it.
It's gotta be good, some part of her thought. It overcame his pride and his workaholism.
"So," she said, voice rusty. "Rochester. How far is that from Buffalo?"
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deehollowaywrites · 7 years
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A serendipitous confluence of events occurred over the past several days when one of my favorite television shows returned with an unexpected side character, the AWP writing conference took over downtown Tampa, and three Kentucky Derby preps ran, including a much-contested San Felipe Stakes.
If these seem disjointed, know that horses are always--shall we say--the glue of my spiritual landscape.
A few friends who also watch the soapy, sneakily feminist Lifetime twist-buffet UnREAL admitted that they didn’t want to spoil my delight at the inclusion of a jockey character, however briefly poor, much-maligned Norman was onscreen (I assume my Twitter reaction delivered). The show, which is a dramatized take on the Bachelor empire of reality TV, attempted to lampshade the ingrained humor of a petite man trying to win the affections of a statuesque woman by having all the characters involved remark on this apparent absurdity. Producers Rachel and Quinn, Everlasting’s star Serena, and Norman all know he’s being played for giggles. A few heated conversations and a drunken bathroom tryst later, Serena cuts Norman from her lineup of possible future husbands. Knowing the show, he might pop up again, but I was sorry to see only one episode devoted to exploring this particular corner of heteronormative masculinity.
“So you’re a jockey jumper, then?” asks the protagonist of Jason Beem’s racetracker novel Southbound. The narrative elaborates, noting that most of the women one might reasonably class as race-rider groupies are “at least five foot seven,” and then moves onto the more pressing topic of whether the woman in question, beautiful and popular paddock host Maria, might shift her interest to the horseplayer protagonist. Despite the novel centering around various racetracks, jockeys rarely show up; there are 44 instances of the word in a 400-page novel. When jockeys do appear, they’re at a distance, on horseback or in the saddling paddock, and seen through a specific, borderline-hostile lens: that of the horseplayer who mistrusts riders. Jockeys are there to be yelled at by spectators, to “stiff” bettors, to do anything other than their jobs, and most saliently, they’re “notoriously horny little creatures” who can be trusted neither to ride their horses honestly nor remain faithful to their partners. Simultaneously sexualized by their in-group and unsexed by external observers, (male) riders are shrouded in layers of marginalization. How is it possible for a rider to be trite joke fodder in one context and erotically imposing in another? In both the universes of UnREAL and Southbound, jockeys fuck women but they’re not meeting the parents--the difference lies in admission, in context required for comprehension.
“I’m an elite athlete!” Norman protests, standing on his five-five dignity, and later, as it seems Serena might be opening up to him, starts a spiel about how his profession is misunderstood. But Serena is intent on hiding their hook-up once she’s sober again, the show’s narrative turning ambiguous as to whether her shame is rooted in poor decision-making, loss of control, or the fact that the guy giving it to her doggy-style was half her height. Meanwhile, Maria the paddock host is casual about dating or sleeping with riders; protagonist Ryan is the one with opinions about it, and so the reader’s attitudes are directed by this point of view. It’s normative but distasteful, where the cast and producers of Everlasting find the idea of a jockey romantic lead neither normative nor tasteful.
Readers of the nonfiction canon of Thoroughbred writing will see reference to a few superstars of the sport edging into popular consciousness as viable romantic heroes. These nearly always fit within a certain profile: white, blond, all-American. Steve Cauthen, Chris Antley, Gary Stevens. Norman of UnREAL is, of course, white. Observers might also note that the current lineup of rock-star jocks is heavily Latino. The sport relies on sexy imagery to sell itself as glamorous and attractive but limits this imagery to female spectators and participants, largely sidelining the appeal of male participants. Barbara Livingston’s infamous beefcake calendar notwithstanding, racing is shot for, marketed to, and discussed almost totally within the realm of the heteronormative male gaze. It’s impossible to untangle the overarching reputation of jockeys from their status within the sport, their concurrent location at its center and its fringes. Physically, according to UnREAL and the accepted romantic tropes it trades on, riders cannot fit the profile of a romantic lead (they might tick the box marked abs with a bullet but they’re--gasp!--short). According to Southbound, reams of five-foot-seven-and-above women are willing to set this deficit aside, and starfucking can’t always account for taste, since low-level Portland Meadows riders get their fair share too.
It’s almost like the height-gap trope beloved of romance enthusiasts only applies to tall men and short women. Who’da thunk?
My favorite panel out of the two days I attended AWP’s writing conference was “Shooters Gotta Shoot: Voice in Sports.” Never have I felt so understood by a bunch of strangers! Author and panelist Katherine Hill noted that football players talk a lot, an offhand comment that kicked the hamster wheel of my brain into high gear. Do jockeys talk? Not where horseplayers can hear them, usually. What they say is filtered through the lens of what the trainer wanted from the race, how the odds stacked up, whether their horse won or lost. Their voices are reduced and fragmented from intersecting angles:
English may be a second language;
The sport of racing itself is a niche one, replete with specific, exclusive vocabulary;
Secretiveness prevails on the backstretch, while the pop-media view of Thoroughbreds relies on tired images of corruption, rigging, and under-the-table deals;
The riders’ place within their sport is layered with uncertainty, from physical danger to the tentative handshake that confirms a mount or takes it away.
If certain trainers had their way, jocks wouldn’t talk at all and no one would request it of them. They would be emotional whipping boys for the losing horse, emotionless mannequins for the winner. Within the shelves of fiction, it’s also rare to hear a jockey speak, likeliest in the crime-novel aisle under Francis. On Harlequin’s website, a search for “football” returns 142 titles, while “baseball” gets 94 options and “hockey” 73. These are the Big Three of sports romance, with basketball, soccer, tennis, NASCAR/F1, and all Olympics-related sports making minor showings as well. Horse racing, when it shows up, falls largely into historical-romance settings--a scandalous duchess at Newmarket, a sheikh’s stable girl--or again in crime and suspense, with horse-theft plots and murdered barn managers. Trainers appear as romantic hero/ines almost to a fault; out of Harlequin’s 9 results for “jockey,” only 2 titles feature an actual Thoroughbred jockey, and both characters are female. While I’m always pleased to read (and write) about female jocks, I don’t find it cynical to assume that these books exist in part because short women are palatable and appealing romantic heroines, while short men are perceived as having Napoleon complexes or little-guy syndromes, and generally being 200 pounds of testosterone in a 115-pound body. So who gets the happily-ever-after? Viking-esque hockey hotshots, American-beefcake ball players, and any hero who falls within an appropriate, narrow conception of heterosexual masculinity. Whose voices are reflected and amplified within the larger field of sports fiction? Whose experiences are projected as normatively male and typically American? Whose bodies are portrayed and received as alluring and desirable, and whose are operating within a historic context of abuse, control, and ownership?
I ground up my nerve to ask a question in that “Voice in Sports” panel, which I rarely manage because I’m a shy doofus. After the panelists’ conversation shifted to the imperial "we” of sports fandom, I asked Hill and poet Jason Koo to discuss how the collective love of fans for their sport can turn toxic--how the boundary is transgressed, at what point possessiveness becomes ownership and how that in turn affects how players are permitted to speak. I was thinking, as I am always thinking, of the relationships between horseplayers, trainers, owners, and jockeys; of that word, owner, and racing’s intertwined history with slavery; of a sport built on the underpaid and sometimes unpaid labor of people of color; of the vitriol casually displayed on the apron, as two days later at Tampa Bay Downs I’d listen to a man next to me yell SHITHEAD! at Julien Leparoux in a post parade. I said that racing is my sport of choice, waited for someone to say that racing isn’t a sport. I said after the panel, thanking Hill and Koo for their remarks, that I write romance--that I have marginalized my own voice in my choice of sport to write about, and my choice of genre to frame that sport, and my choice of mostly queer characters to people that sport’s fictional world.
Nonetheless Javier Castellano has his better story, his voice triumphing over Mike Smith’s. Nonetheless I write on, delighted in the space in which I’ve found myself, continue to find myself.
It’s my job as a romance writer to depict race-rider leads and love interests as exciting, sexy, and appealing. It’s my pleasure as a racing fan to depict jockeys themselves as multifaceted, compelling, and human.
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I was tagged by: @rebel-eds , thanks for giving me something to do B 💓
1. last drink?: Shitty imitation coffee. 
2: last phone call?: my mommy.
3. last text message?: "okay mommy" you can only guess who i sent it to.
4. last song you listened to?: Best Friends by Grandson. (Its a banger beatbi suggest everyone give it a listen)
5. last time you cried?: Thusday night last week.
6. dated someone twice?:  Yes, and i was mistaken both times.
7. kissed someone and regretted it: I kissed a guy who only kissed me to date my mom.
8. been cheated on?: Yeah actually, and the kicker was that it was an irl relationship between me and this person and they cheated on me with someone from across the country... So.
9. lost someone special?: Not really?
10. been depressed?: Oooooh boy.
11. gotten drunk and thrown up?:  Story time! Ive been black out drunk, once. I invited my current bf over for some video games (we had been dating for like a month maybe) and i thought "boy imma get stupid and put the moved on him" drank 2 things of box wine to myself (1 box is equal to 4 glasses of wine lol) ended up getting sick really fast and left my bf to watch my younger 2 siblings while i threw up. Thats all i remember. (I think i also tried to shave my legs?)
Fave colors
12. Green (every single shade)
13. Black, like oil black so its not as dark.
14. Like a dusty brown yellow color.
in the last year have you…
15. made new friends?:  I think so? I hope so cause theres alot of people on here i just recently met that im already considering my friends.
16. fallen out of love?: Yes... Honestly its the saddest feeling in the world.
17. laughed until you cried?: I did that last night over the fact i said i wanted to become a professional hotdog juicer.
18. found out someone was talking about you?: Yeah, im a snoopy bitch.
19. met someone who changed you?: Oh yes, some of them were for the better, but this one person im thinking in particular... I wish he would stop.
20. found out who your friends are?: Yeah actually, i moved and alot of the people i considered "friends" started talking crap, and alot of the people i just considered stuck up for me.
21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list?: Does my mom count?
general:
22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl?: Like a solid 80% of them, others are people i briefly met at cons or whatever.
23. do you have any pets?: I have 2 kitties! My sisters fat cat Juno and my demon Leia.
24. do you want to change your name?: Not really, i feel like ive got a pretty cool name.
25. what did you do for your last birthday?: I cried and threw up on myself lol.
26. what time did you wake up today?: 8:46 am i remember because i wooe up amd the first thought i had was: "if i dont get up the carrots will attack."
27. what were you doing at midnight last night?: Editing my fic and watching School of Rock.
28. what is something that you can’t wait for?: I have a sad life thats going nowhere so i have nothing to look forward to.
30. what are you listening to right now?: California Dreamin' by The Mamas and Papas.
31. have you ever talked to a person named tom?: I worked for a guy named Tom. Tom was an asshat.
32. something getting on your nerves?: The fact that im not aloud to sing or dance around the hoyse anymore.
33. most visited website?: Tumblr lol.
34. hair color?: I had purple hair before i dyed it brown, so its kinda like orangy brown with a tint of pink.
35. long or short hair: This is a hard question because my hair is a mega floof. So it looks short but when i flat iron it its fairly long.
36. do you have a crush on someone?: Honestly.... I think so.
37. what do you like about yourself?:  Im not a huge fan of my outsides (my appearance) but i love my insides. I think im hella funny, and goofy but i know im not very pleasant to look at. But thats okay ☺
38. want any piercings: I already have my snake bites and 2 holes in each ear, but im dying to have my bellybutton, eyebrow, and either my nipples or tongue done. (Maybe a double helix UGH i dont know)
39. blood type: i think im AB positive?
40. nicknames: Jae, JJ, Jada, Scoob, scooberndude, bug, beb, moose, little angry one, you.  
41. relationship status: Taken.
42. zodiac: imma Capricorn.
43. pronouns: I mostly go by They/them, but im okay with her/she too.
44. fave tv show: Ive re-discovered 'Dan vs. Everything' and im in love.
45. tattoos: ive got 4, 1 on my left arm, 2 of my right. And one on the back of my neck (i should just face reveal and show them honestly i get asked about them so much)
46. right or left handed: left handed (imma diamond in the rouge)
47. ever had surgery: GOD NO.
48 . piercings: Yep like i said before. Ove got 6, my snake bites and 2 in each ear.
49. sport: I USE to play baseball amd hockey. (I was also on a roller derby team if that counts)
50. vacation: I haven't been on vacation since i was 8.
51. trainers: No.
more general
52. eating: I was told that you should drink water 20 minutes before eating, because dehydration can feel like hunger. I started doing that like a week ago and ive eaten maybe 4 times since 😂
53. drinking: Water 😎 (hydration is sexy, yall should go get some)
54. im about to watch: myself post this amd regret it.
55. waiting for: my mom to get home so i can come put of my room.
56. want: More records.
57. get married? After some consideration, probably not ever gonna happen.
58. career: i dunno yet, i just know i wanna go to film/art school!
59. hugs or kisses: keeses 😙
60. lips or eyes: The eyes.
61. shorter or taller: i dont really mind either, evidentally though its always tall because im short as fuck.
62. older or younger: Still doesnt really matter to me, as long as they aint a pedo.
63. nice arms or stomach: Arms, because i love being held.
64.  hookup or relationship: a relationship where you pretend not to know each other and "hook up"
65. troublemaker or hesitant: im not really either? Like im not very shy, but im not so far out there that i get in trouble.
66. kissed a stranger: Thats how you get hepatitis.
67. drank hard liquor: Yes, i still would but i get hella nervous about it (im a stoner not a drinker eeeeh)
68. lost glasses: yep! Thats why i dont have them now.
69. turned someone down: Not really. No one has ever asked me out before :/
70. sex on the first date: im a hoe and proud, but this is a major no no.
71. broken someones heart: i think so... But they broke all of me first.
72. had your heart broken: Ive had alot more than just my heart broken.
73. been arrested: Yes i was arrested when i was 9.
74. cried when someone died: Ive been crying over David Bowie for 2 years now, yes.
75. fallen for a friend: This is the only way i can get into a relationship
do you believe in…
76. yourself: Yes! I can do the thing!
77. miracles: Sadly no, ive never had one happen for me.
78. love at first sight: Kinda? Like it starts out as "i wanna punch your face in" at first site, and THEN i fall in love.
79. santa clause: yes because my papa is santa.... I seen it.
80. kiss on a first date: i always barf if someone tries to kiss me on the first date. (Not because it grosses me out but because i got bad anxiety lol)
81. angels: Absolutly because all my friends are angels 💓
82. best friend’s name: I... I dont have one? (Does my twin count? Her name is Dawn)
83. eye color: Green!
84. fave movie: Probably Pretty in Pink.
85. fave actor: Lesie motherfucking Jones! This girl is amazing, she went to an art school in Colorado for a basketball scholarship and ended up in theater and on SNL instead. I aspire to be cool enough to earn my way onto SNL.
I should tag some peepes: @trashmouthmissy @spaghetti-head-eds , @thegreatwhiteferret , @beepbeepbongoboyy , and anyone else who wants to do this can and tag me saying i tagged you 😎
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fenweak · 7 years
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a kane/toews rule 63 + genderswap fic rec. just because.
short  = ~2,000
medium = 2,000 - 20,000 words
long = 20,000 - 60,000 words
novel length = 60,000~ words
★ are personal faves 
girl!Jonny
Bluehawk by aohatsu ★ - explicit | medium | friends with benefits | podfic by exmahater
Jo sleeps with Kaner for the second time when she’s twenty-one and gets drunk off her ass in a bar in Vancouver.
only wanna dance with you by maleyka - explicit | medium | pwp
"Comfortable?" Jeannie asks tonelessly, and Patrick wriggles a little more, just to annoy her."Perfect," he says, deriving a great amount of pleasure from Jeannie's huffy sigh.
Jehanne Toews tag by SimoneCloseau (WIP) ★- expicit | medium | hockey player Pat and med student Jonny yesss
like you want me to - explicit | medium | pwp | podfic by exmanhater
So it's easy, when they're drunk and high on winning, and they've been dancing for a while, and Kaner is so so close and breathing heavily against her ear. It's so easy to say, "Wanna go back to mine?"
get on your knees (you’ve got something to prove) -  explicit | medium | friends with benefits | pwp 
“I am actually pretty good at sex though,” Patrick says as a non sequitur, picking back up on the conversation from earlier.
forever i’ll try for you and I by staraflur - teen | medium | college
It’s extra great—whenever Jo’s losing, she always makes like their running point tally competition isn’t real. Tonight’s true to form: when Trish holds up three fingers and points at herself, then two before pointing at Jo, Jo actually scoffs as she pokes at a couple chicken breasts with the tongs, trying to find the best one.
girl!Kaner
Two-Way Forward by exmanhater, torigates  ★ - explicit | medium | epistolary | podfic 
“I think I’m on my phone enough as it is, you know, always texting and emailing, and people complain that I get back to them three, four days later, I’m not fast enough for that. I’m bad enough as it is, and I feel like I’m always on my phone.”
Or; Five Times Pat emailed Jonny and one time he emailed her back.
Like You Have a Secret by Linsky - explicit | long | friends to lovers | girl in disguise | now with a hot new sequel!
Patricia Tabitha Kane is the best freaking hockey player in the NCAA, and it is ridiculously unfair that her brother is the one with an invitation to the Blackhawks prospect camp.
something old, something new by longtime_lurker ★ - explicit | medium  | friends to lovers | outdoor/wedding sex! | podfic by exmanhater
Jonny's standard canned press response is that he loves Kaner like a sister...which is perfectly true, if you’re talking like on Game of Thrones.
Like Other Girls by BlackEyedGirl - mature | medium | female friendships | podfic by smoulderandbraids, by | art by esouffle
Pat's relationship with the media has been fraught since she was drafted, second round, home to Buffalo. Her relationship with her new Captain, when she eventually winds up in Chicago a couple of years later, doesn't start off a whole lot better. But by the time she's flying back from Biel, she's willing to admit that she had missed their thing just a little, weird as he's always been around her.
Write Our Names On the Wall by twentysomething ★ - medium | friends with benefits 
 "What are you saying?" Johnny says slowly, because this sounds like she's trying to pick him up, which is impossible, because if Kaner has one concrete rule, it's ‘anyone but teammates.’
"We can help each other out here," Kaner suggests, crossing her legs in her too-short skirt. "That's all. Two friends helping each other out in a dry spell. You're free to do whatever. It wouldn't be a big deal."
Cutting Into You series by elisera - explicit | medium | friends to lovers, established relationship | friends with benefits 
Maybe she needs to stop complaining to him about guys not dropping everything to fuck her. Kaner does, and he’s basically been looking at her ever since they both hit puberty, so. + There’s people everywhere, music thumping through the main room and drowning out most of whatever everyone’s shouting at each other, and she needs to get out there, right in the middle of it, celebrate the fuck out of this Cup win with her team, but Johnny doesn’t give a single fuck right now. First things first.
anorgasmic girl!Kaner by fourfreedoms ★ - explicit | medium | follow up here | slack shenanigans and elevator hijinks, and a smug Jonathan making girl Patrick have the time of her life. A+
Life is a Dance Floor by bessyboo, thisissirius - teen | medium | friends to lovers
The first time I met Jonathan Toews, he let a door close in my face. Not one of those metaphorical doors that get shut ‘cause I’m a girl in the NHL, but a literal door.
All the things we never thought we wanted by toewsyourheart - mature | long | established relationship | angst | miscarriage | pat is a psychiatrist, jonny is a still in the nhl
Pat and Jonathan lean on each other to get through an unexpected loss. this is a story about grief, and a love solid enough to help you out of it.
patricia kane, figure skater by allthebros - short | olympics AU
the shape of you by thundersquall - explicit | medium | college AU
Patricia Kane. Well, Jonny at least has her name now.He can't help but watch her as she pulls herself out of the pool to sit at the side, laughing at something Dayna just said. She lifts her arms to fumble at her bun and then pulls her hair-tie off, shaking her hair out; Jonny stares, transfixed, as a cascade of thick blonde curls tumble down her back."Oh boy," Sharpy says. "Guys, Tazer is smitten. Look at his face.""Shut the fuck up," Jonny says, as the guys start hooting and laughing. "I just - I think she's pretty cute, that's all."
Pat(ricia) by friskaz - teen | medium 
 There's no way to tell, with her clothes on, that she's not who she says she is, Patrick Kane, rockstar of the NHL.[Always-a-girl AU]
Zero is our hero. by BoyGirlBothNoneImTheUniverse - mature | medium | high school AU
Patricia Kane gets a boyfriend and not much else happens.
Hang Up and You Call Right Back by cupstealer, SimoneCloseau  (WIP)- explicit | medium | enemies to lovers | college AU
Toews. Diana is grinding with Jonathan Toews. Aw, really? That guy? She hates that guy. Pat watches, disgusted as he bends his head to Diana’s neck, lips skimming the skin there.
Patricia Kane unwittingly follows Jonathan Toews to UND.
Think We Fell In Love + sequels | podfic - explicit | medium | friends with benefits | 
Jonny and Kaner have a lot of sex. Then they're dipshits about it.
+ Post-lockout sex.Or, Jonny and Kaner are still dipshits, but now they're dipshits who know they're in love with each other.(now with bonus fisting pwp)
This song is the cross that i bear (bear with me) - explicit | medium | friends to lovers | ice dancing AU
Because when you get right down to it, winning a gold medal was always more plausible to him than sleeping with Joanie Toews.
+ genderqueer Pat: 
Drawing Lines In The Palm of Your Hand by Sharksdontsleep - explicit | medium | podfic by Opalsong
“I kind of proved a lot of people wrong and proved to myself I can play this game in this body.” - Pat Kane
Genderqueer AU.
cause everyone’s heart doesn’t beat the same- explicit | medium | trans Pat
"Thirteen year old Pat Kane has short hair and a shorter temper, stands at five foot nothing and wants you to know about it. He plays hockey like he'll die if he can't, and if you have a problem with him, you have a problem with his whole team.
That's the way he's always wanted it."
1988 femslash!
That Round and Round Thing series by exmanhater  ★  - explicit | medium | podfic by bessyboo | roller derby AU
Pat’s pretty sure this has been the most confusing week she’s ever had since that time in fourth grade when she got her period for the first time in the middle of gym while wearing white shorts and thought she was dying, despite her mother’s previously imparted information about puberty (true fucking story). Or, the real account of how Patricia Kane and Jonny Toews, roller derby stars, finally pulled their heads out of their asses and started banging.
Shut Up Honey by aohatsu - teen | medium | mutual pining | friends to lovers | podfic by exmanhater
It's just a little frustrating, that Patricia can be so good at their sport, and then still look the way she does.
press yourself into me series by LikeAMovieIOnceSaw - explicit | medium | established relationship | pwp
"Oh my gosh, look at that butt" was the first thing she'd ever said to Jonny. They went from there.
I Was Busy Thinkin' 'Bout (Girls) by Linsky - explicit | long | friends with benefits
Jonny looks away quickly, cheeks going hot. She knows better than to stare at other girls’ breasts in the locker room.
You Might Want To Turn Your Head by exmanhater - explicit | medium | pegging! | established relationship | second part of a series about colliding genderbending universes
"It's not very big," he says, voice light and teasing. "You think I can't handle more than that?"
"We'll get there," Jonny says. "Start slow, eh?" 
Patrick laughs. "Oh, for sure," he says, doing his unfortunately accurate generic Canadian accent. Jonny doesn't think it's fair that she lives full-time in a world where Patrick Kane has a decent Canadian accent, but as long as she gets to wring orgasms out of him, she's prepared to accept it.
Pass Me Through Your Fingertips - mature | medium | friends with benefits
Five Times Jonny Noticed Kaner and One Time Kaner Noticed Her Back
 “I mean it, Tazer baby. We’re gonna show those boys how it’s done.”And Jonny looked her up and down one more time, before reaching out to tug a few curls into place, flicking her on the nose once for good measure.“We always do,” she said, and her gaze was locked on Kaner’s and Kaner felt like she could take over the entire world.
girl i've never loved one like you - explicit | medium | roomie troubles
Pat has the hotel room to herself, and she decides it’s not at all unreasonable to make good use of her alone time to have some, ahem, alone time.And then Toews walks in.(In which Kane and Toews face orgasms and feelings. They do alright.)
Strings Definitely Attached - mature | short | pining | podfic by exmanhater
“It’d be convenient, and it makes sense,” Pat says when she brings it up, her shoulders curving in a shrug as she slides her way into Janie’s space and lets her fingers brush Janie’s wrist in a touch that’s innocent, a sly, winsome smile on her face that is anything but.
genderswap
i get a good feeling that i never had before, no no by forochel - explicit | medium |  suddenly-a-girl!Pat
 kaner gets turned into a girl in the aftermath of game 6.me in an email: "it takes their minds off the loss okay! like, who the fuck can break down over that when they have this problem to solve. right here."and solve it they do. they solve it hard. everywhere. all day long.
pretty good looking for a girl by liketheroad - medium | suddenly-a-girl!Jonny
In which Jonny turns into a short, ugly girl, but Patrick still wants to hit that anyway.
my backwards walk - explicit | medium | suddenly-a-girl!Jonny | 
Jonny groaned again, then flinched at the sound of his own voice. He lifted his head and shoulders off the bed, stared down at his now much more shapely body. Threw his head back on the pillow, closed his eyes tight, then opened them again.
The breasts were still there.
 still into you by altri_uccelli ★ - explicit | novel length | suddenly-a-girl!Jonny | friends with benefits
It's not even 12 hours after Jonny discovers he's a girl that he's sprawled on an itchy sofa, biting on his fist and being eaten out by Patrick Kane. He can't believe that a day exists in which having oral sex with Kaner, his oldest friend on the team and frequently a pain in his ass, is not the weirdest thing to happen.
Disney Rules and Physics by sailorstkwrning - teen | medium | parallel universe
Patrick Kane and his rule!63 self swap places; Jonny gets them back where they belong.
Do You Know What You Started? by Linsky - explicit | medium | porn with feelings | masturbation
Jonny gets turned into a girl, and Patrick doesn’t recognize him. Jonny really shouldn’t take advantage of this.He really, really shouldn’t.
the shadow and the frame by longtime_lurker - explicit | medium | friends with benefits
"Quit freaking out," Kaner says, breath hot in Jonny's ear. "We're both chicks right now, nothing gay about that.""Do you even listen to yourself?" Jonny mutters.
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