#Data supervisors
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Data Stewards
The term data steward never resonated well with me; I prefer the terminology business data owners, as this term conveys a stronger sense of responsibility. The role should mandate authority and respect while it is there to safeguard the integrity and value of data. So, letās dive into and define what data stewards areāindividuals appointed to oversee the data quality for specific domains orā¦
#business data owners#Data administrators#Data caretakers#Data controllers#Data custodians#Data guardians#Data Heroes#Data managers#data stewards#Data supervisors#Information stewards#masterdata
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very excited to go on my work trip because there are MUSEUMS and other things that will be close to my hotel
#i will definitely be constantly doing activities. and not be playing any video games#but itāll be nice because iāll just be training the supervisor over there on the other reports sheāll be in charge of#and updating/walking her through the training deck so sheāll be able to teach classes herself#and then when i get back iāll be starting in a new department (data management) which is fun
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wrote another little piece thinking about valentine post-ending dealing with what remains of johnny in her head, and how she gets out of the medical research floor but part of her head stays there, right? so she's talking to goro some time when she's having a bad brain day and voices her ever-present concern "how do I know this is real? how do I know this all isn't a test to see if I react the way arasaka thinks I should? if they're testing my loyalty?" and that thought feels paranoid in the bright light of the day but a lot more real at 11pm in her own small room alone with a man she can't show her true feelings for or else risk shortening both their leashes. and in the end goro manages to convince her that they're both real and what's happening to them is real, and he does that by being vulnerable in a way that she knows arasaka would never script for her.
and that just really makes me think of certain types of discomfort, or a narrow view on the world always show through in stories. it reminds me of older scifi stories which could imagine fantastical technologies but never the dissolution of the nuclear family. you look back at some stories and see the queer undertones immediately and think "how could someone not know" but it was so foreign to them they couldn't even conceive of it. anyway it's fascinating to think that valentine believes that arasaka would mess with her head and test her in fucked up ways, but they would never be able to accurately capture the way goro desperately wants to touch her. and yeah of course it's a gender thing.
#i think of all the poses rigged for 'fem' and 'masc' and how if it's f/m it's all very heterosexual#i mean the in game models themselves are such different sizes despite being roughly the same height/size for gameplay reasons#i think of that because i think if arasaka *does* mess with people's heads how do they program all that#you think they have their own models? their own rigs? their own recorded movements? their own data banks?#if it's not a 1-1 comparison to game assets and such it's the same idea#what kind of libraries do they have to engineer situations? especially when their subject has aphantasia?#could they even program goro crawling in valentine's lap with any sense of realism and weight?#would someone's supervisor okay that test? record it? store it? wouldn't that be improper? crossing the line?#would the answer change if valentine was playing the Man being tempted by a woman and not a closeted bi man?#all these thoughts and more
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Despairing a little about the state of my master's thesis. It could have been so good if I hadn't stopped caring. I keep losing interest when it is one of my favourite topics and one I chose a year in advance. More guidance would have helped me a lot. Someone who showed they cared and would have made me work on it, too. (I am so bad at doing things if there is no extrinsic motivation. Sometimes I feel lost like a dog that needs a task and attention.) And a better work ethic. A better research question. The thesis feels so random, and I am not qualified for the discussion. Two weeks left, the most important intellectual part still missing. I hate this. One paper in your time studying has to be your worst, but why does it have to be the final one?
#i am so ready to leave science for good#i hate it i am not fit for it i am not interested in it#personal log#uni#my bachelor's thesis was so good though#and like a master's thesis already according to supervisor no. 2#straight as all throughout school. 1.29 in my bachelor's degree. 1.4something in the master's programme despite covid. and now this.#with this thesis i could write so much about the area in general. about heathland and practices. but i can't seem to apply any of the#knowledge to my data and i am not even researching anymore
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why the fuck does my supervisor want to have a teams meeting!!!!! Itās SATURDAY!!!! I donāt want to be dramatic but I want to start crying
#this is so stupid it is not that serious and this is still easier than my previous job but#i rlly need a break from her. forever. I miss my old supervisor sm#girl work the thing out urself why do u need me to explain everything to you!!!!#she will request so much info and so much data but shes not willing to analyze anything on her own#youāre an officer???#I rlly rlly needed this break. Iām still gonna work but. IN PEACE!!!
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Me: is having a perceived failure cause I didn't do something right the first time
My boss: Hey, it's a learning curve. You were almost there. You did a good job still.
Needless to say I am just
#WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK HE'S SO MEAN HE REALLY IS SUCH A NICE GUY????#I think part of it is he knows that I *want* to do this and that I *want* to try first to see how far I can get#and that I am willing to learn#one of the other engineers said he was really excited to work with me as like... my supervisor and boss#instead of occasionally working together for certain projects#gonna work on not get flustered about messing up tho nfjahdjwhsusgs#OH and one of the other testers who doesn't think he's a bad guy literally said āI don't think he'd take you under his wing -ā#ā-if he didn't think you were capable of doing great thingsā so yeah I WANNA CRY /pos#data log: personal
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Any neurotypical wanna lend me their brain for a day or so?
#loopy rambles#listen I love being neurodivergent#but right now I really need to write this section of my PhD application#and my brain has decided that because it doesnāt have an example structure to follow it simply wonāt write anything#on the plus side I did get a lot of boring data tidying done whilst procrastinating#down side Iām gonna have to wake up stupidly early to try and get it done before my supervisor meeting#Iām also stressing because I have two days to finalise and submit everything#which feels very last minute and I hate it
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Didn't have going around campus on a male classmate's motorcycle on my bingo card
#lmfaoo#we are under the same supervisor and we are both collecting primary data from students#so yesterday we met at campus to collect data together and he brought his motorcycle? and asked me to get on it if I didn't have problemā¢#at first I refused to get on his bike partly because I hadn't ridden on one since childhood and#mostly because I didn't want to be seen on a guy's bike š not that the particular guy is a problem#but yeah i understand that it would be highly inefficient if I walked or something so I got on it#he actually seems pretty chill and his wife(?) is our classmate as well. there's no problem unless anyone else interprets it wrong#the circumstances are funny but I have decided not to talk about it with my uni friends so hello internet
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could use some good words this morning
spent the entire night in the hospital with my mom and im feeling a kind of way
#yes this is attention seeking behaviour#because i want attention#there was zero cellular data at the hospital#so all i did while i was waiting was make FS/Simpsons edits using the memes that were already on my phone#uhhhh be ready for those I guess#sheās doing alright#but sheās in a lot of pain :(#sulley speaks#i have to go to work now with zero sleep#im the acting supervisor at the clinic today#and quite literally the only person who can unlock the doors and use the equipment
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when u get a tiny criticism and want 2 die
#my bad for being a bit distractable but it was a nice conversation with people i havent seen in a while#and TO BE FAIR i didnt actually take my 10 oclock break lmfao ... also peoples handwriting sucks#the guy isnt normally .. like that so its probably just been a bit of a time but like ... oof#my coworker was like 'sorry for being distracting' and like nah not your fault i probably would have nodded off if you didnt#data entry is boring as hell and in this case kind of subjective#OH WELL its not normally my job im off to go beg my site supervisor to touch dirt my knee is fine i promise#rory's ramblings
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literally every time i go AUGH. I HAVE TO GIVE A PRESENTATION OR TALK IN A MEETING! it always goes well so you'd think after a certain amount of time that i would catch onto this and stop worrying about it so bad but, well,
#still wary of a big presentation i have to do in march.#i should be preparing for it as we speak but uhhhh#idk what to do without a supervisor and with my team lead being out this week#like i vaugely know what my section of the presentation is so i guess i can come up with what data i wanna show#anyway. i AM right to be worried for that one i swear-#it's cause the person im presenting to is known to be very nitpicky so it's likely my section of the presentation gets grilled w questions
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idk everything related to the planning of my MA thesis makes me cry.
#i feel so childish and stupid. im afraid my thesis topic is immature. partly suffering from imposter syndrome i guess#i have to reply to an email#i have to think of what methodology i can use. what data.#i feel so lost. i don't even have a defined research question#and then there's the loneliness and the fact im supposed to finish my studies this year and the anxiety regarding that#im finally having a nice time in a student organization i like and im just. supposed to graduate and lose all that.#anyways. maybe ill have a thesis supervisor if i reply to that email. i dunno if she's suitable. but it's not like i have many options.#my posts
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ok ok ok five research interviews in the bag, one more scheduled, three more agreed in principle. YOU'RE GOOD YOU'RE GOOD
#and maybe someone else will get back to me before i start the data analysis for real#it's half of the sixteen i wanted but my supervisor always thought that was a bit ambitious#adventures in academia
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mission failed weāll get em next time ššššššššš
#i literally canāt quit omg i feel so fucking bad. it wasnāt so bad this time but also HE LITERALLY FORCED ME TO COME OUT LKKE GIRL HELLO???#he cornered me and asked me if redacted had to do w my s*duality and i was like ummmmm. yeah š«£ and he was like now why didnāt you say that#the first time š¤Ø and i was like ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦. š³. AND THEN i asked him why he asked me that and he said heās been waiting for the right moment to ge#it out of me and he always suspected it LIKE HELLO I THINK THAT IS POSSIBLY WILDLY INAPPROPRIATE I WANTED TO DIEEEEEE#and i lied right to his face abt stuff w my mom and also the redacted situation bc i always feel in trouble whenever i talk abt them w him#and also he asked how things were w my mom and i told him and he was like thatās great but how are things with YOU and yoir mom š¤Ø. UGHHHHH#and i canāt leave bc his supervisor is gravely ill and they havenāt talked abt doing inter generational therapy w me yet which is what they#want to do <- hasnāt looked it up yet and doesnāt know what it receals about me. and he also is like yet agai. trying to get me to separate#myself from data expunged AND ITS LIKE OMGGGG NOTHING IS HAPPENING WHY DO I HAVE TO THROW AWAY A GOOD THING THAT IS WORKING FOR ME JUST FOR#THE SAKE OF CONFORMING TO SOME STUOID MENTAL HEALJT STANDARD. so yeah ummmmm idk what to dooooo i know im not getting the best possible car#and this whole thing has been a cluster fuck but he validated my reaction to something for the first time like EVER today and he has plans#and what if they work. and like omg if i drop it on him heāll be so hurt and surprised like it will really come out of nowhere and i donāt#want to look like even more of a fool to him than iam. but he says i canāt withhold stuff bc itās doing me a disservice and we need to see#the fullness of who i am to get to the root and solve problems and stuff but itās like uhmmmmā¦ but you donāt make me feel safe for reacting#the way i do or wanting things to work out in a way you disagree with so how can i bring out all the parts of me if you donāt make me feel#safe and unjudged for doing so like. lol. the thought of leaving him makes me feel so guilty and stupid bc it s like why are you throwing a#away sliding scale therapy that could turn out to be really useful and running away when ppl tell you things abt yourself you donāt like to#admit and force you to look at your hard ugly truths. but also the thought of working w him until july after already having had 16 weeks of#this literaly makes me fucking insane so idk what to do and finding a new counselor would be so hard and i donāt have time or money. UGHHHH#purrs#delete later#like how am i gonna walk out on him when we just spent all this time talking abt how this new technique will bring me into a new season. AU
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full of despair, when literally every item at the library can be avaliabe within 70 minutes (or 2 days if itās at the other site) the one thing I need has a unique 4 weeks wait time
#random#this is kinda on me for not asking for it earlier#but literally everywhere they advertise the 70minute wait#and it worked wayyy better for my schedule to do it now#my diss supervisor was like do it now#but also should have left me more wriggle room#arghh#it's fine#i have other data that's phat#and the ONS always has your back#but aksdjfla;skdjf
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Watching facilitators just royally fuck up focus groups is going to be my villain origin story
#deep deep sigh#we are so off track and not answering the question at all#dear supervisors#Just because you want your team to engage in employee listening#does not mean theyāre actually trained or capable of leading focus groups effectively#being the only person who cares about qualitative data on a team is exhausting sometimes#personal
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