#DUDE 90% OF PROGRAMS CAN'T DO THAT

[potted-cilantro]

Ripping apart Adobe Photoshop with my teeth

[tyrantisterror]

Woah, that’s pretty heavy, dude. I’ve never seen anyone analyze the series that way, but now that you brought those themes up, they seem pretty damn obvious. Can you elaborate on this interpretation of the shorts and the series? As well as each version’s respective symbolism? How do you think the main cast gaining new colors at the end of the original, only to lose them for the new series factors in to this interpretation. What do Roy and Lesley represent?

Each of the original shorts puts the three main puppets in the role of students and has a different teacher force a "lesson" upon them.

In Creativity, the teacher keeps telling the students how great creativity is, while constantly shutting down their attempts to actually express their own thoughts and feelings, whether it be by questioning the purpose of her arbitrary rules for what they should do or by making artistic choices she doesn't approve of - "Green is not a creative color" isn't just a funny joke, but the whole point of the short and how education often fails when trying to teach art. Because schools put so much emphasis on "objective" evaluations of student progress, they often fail to truly teach inherently subjective subjects like art and creative writing - you can't let people express themselves freely if you have to force them to fit a super strict rubric. "Be creative, but only use the colors I allow you to, only do the activities I've assigned, only think the way I think" is inherently contradictory advice, and by the end of the short the students are so frustrated that they express their creativity in a way that gets them banned from doing it ever again - "let's all agree to never be creative again" is where the short ends.

In Time, the teacher tries to explain the concept of time in an inherently over-simplified and often borderline inaccurate and nonsensical way, to the increasing frustration of the students. The teacher specifically puts a big emphasis on 1. being punctual and 2. believing that the past was generically shitty but it's done so we don't have to worry about it, and the future will be great so don't worry about it. All of these "lessons" are designed to make the students think about time only in the sense of it being a rule they have to obey - a schedule to stick to. When the students actually ask insightful questions about time - "Is time even real? Does anyone know?" - the teacher gets angry and punishes them by forcing them to contemplate their own mortality, all to reinforce the idea that time is just an arbitrary set of rules they have to obey or else.

In Love, the yellow puppet is given lots of empty platitudes about how great love and compassion is and how he should value them, only to then have a bunch of arbitrary rules about how and when one should love heaped on him once he agrees that love is important, with the rules eventually saying his love should be to some nebulous authority figure - "Our king" in the cult imagery of the episode is very much a stand-in for authority in general. We're shown how education can make even the most wholesome-sounding of lessons twisted for a purpose of controlling and manipulating students, forcing them to believe in things that aren't real for the benefit of a select few.

I feel I don't need to explain the Computer episode to anyone who's been in a public school's computer class in the 90's/early 2000's, it kind of explains itself. But a huge problem in education to this day is the persistent belief that you can make students teach themselves by throwing shitty yet expensive "cutting edge" education programs at them - it's what 90% of school budget increases go into because it makes the politicians who buy them look like they care without actually putting any work into understanding what education really needs.

The nutrition episode makes fun of how goddamn mercurial nutrition education has been over the last few decades - one minute eggs are good for you, then you're having too much of them, then you need more of them again, it's fucking madness - and how ultimately all nutrition education does is give you so much anxiety about the foods you pick for yourself that you just buy whatever's advertised for you the flashiest, even if it's really bad for you (like canned meat from one of your few remaining friends).

In the final episode of the original shorts, the Red Guy, having escaped his teachers, finds himself in the dreary adult world, and despite everything actually pines for the simpler days of being a student. He decides to look into the nature of his education, and sees not only how shitty and half-baked a system it is, but also the true root of it: that it wasn't made for the benefit of students, but for the parents who made those kids and want them indoctrinated so they behave better. That's what Roy represents - the parent who doesn't really care about their child learning anything useful beyond "obey the people in charge."

As for the show being about the horrors of the mundane adult world, well, I think that's pretty obvious. One episode is literally about getting jobs. Another is about confronting your own eventual death. They're not subtle about it. And hell, it builds off the finale of the original shorts - Red Guy already transitioned from childhood to adulthood, it's only fitting his pals came with him.

[agent-bash]

Of the three possible Chicago Fire exits which do you think is most likely?

Oof, this is a tough one. I'm gonna put my answer under the cut, Nonny.

Mouch: I'm 50-50 here. Maybe more 60-40 odd on him staying. I 100% think he'll survive, but he's been injured a bunch over the years, and he's getting near retirement age, so maybe despite surviving he's gonna wanna ride the pine to retirement.

Severide: 70-30 odds he's gone. I don't know why I'm so pessimistic here, but I am. It's just a feeling I can't shake that Taylor is done. I do not necessarily think a Stellaride breakup is going to happen; they can keep up with him being arson lone out to fed operations and keep things off-screen if they want, but yeah, I don't know if we're ever going to see Severide again.

Brett: She's gone, 90-10 odds here, maybe even 95-5 and only because I don't believe in giving 100% odds to much of anything. They just really didn't do much with her last season. And what they did do they almost always tied to her and Casey so yeah...She gone. At least if she leaves (let's be real when she leaves) it's not like it was with Chaplin Dude, where she left for a much quieter town and he was trying to convince her not to work as a paramedic and fill the role of Chaplin's wife. Portland, while not Chicago, is a major city, there are lots of opportunities out there for her as a paramedic, and she could even try and get her paramedicine program running out there too.

So yeah. Not sold on Mouch leaving; sinking feeling about Severide; and pretty damn sure Sylvie's gone is where I'm at for Fire.

How about you?

[sherrymagic]

get to know me ⭐️🌙🌼

thanks for tagging me dearest @pondsphuwin i always appreciate to be tagged in these (even when it takes me a while to do them ahhsaasdja) ♡♡♡♡♡

do you make your bed? - as an habit i do, yes. but i tend to forget if i wake up in a bad mood i guess

what's your favourite number? - 7

what is your job? - office worker/trainee archivist

If you could go back to school would you? - 100% no

can you parallel park? - can't drive

a job you had that would surprise people? - i don't think any of the only two jobs i ever had would surprise people? i've been working in a bookstore as a seller, that would probably be the most shocking to people since i am quite shy (and i hated it fr)

do you think aliens are real? - who doesn't??

can you drive a manual car? - dude i can barely drive a bike (actually i don't use mine because i always fall down while i curve)

what's your guilty pleasure? - this reality program where 3 estate agents compete to find a house for a different person/couple every episode, i am LIVING for this silly thing

tattoos? - nope, i have none

favourite colour? - white

favourite type of music? - whatever i vibe with? idk but if i had to choose i'd say oldish rock music but i listen to a lot of questionable pop/rap stuff as well so...

do you like puzzles? - i guess?

any phobias? - claustrophobia, fear of heights, and i am insanely scared of most insects

favourite childhood sport? - tennis

do you talk to yourself? - all the time

what movie(s) do you adore? - my super favorite film genre is thriller films especially the ones from 80s/90s/early 00s, but i also love the hunger games saga a lot

coffee or tea? - none, i hate all hot beverages exceot for hot chocolate

first thing you wanted to be growing up - an ice cream maker 😭😭😭

tagging some newer moots (no pressure & feel super free to ignore me if you already did this/don't want to!!) @supanuts @aylinluna @markpakin @sunsongsa @khaopybara + @srnileforme @spicypussywave 🩷✨

[autumnbrambleagain]

im just saying, wrt Flight of Dragons, Peter started his graduate degree and burned out and decided he wanted to write fantasy instead. Except his book is unfinished, and his board game is something he's trying to get random pawn shop owners to invest in to get off the ground.

He's in the late 90s, even if he succeeds 3.0 is a month or two away. The resurgence of tabletop is coming. And that isn't to his benefit. His one shitty boardgame is going to end up in a handful of LGS and that's about it. People play it sometimes, it's fine.

If he hadn't become suddenly rich from selling magic artifacts irl, he'd have been yet another person trying to ride the tabletop gaming wave and washing out. And the fact that this is the dude that used """logic""" to deny that magic was real despite experiencing it, how much fun do you think his games really are?

Anyway, but that doesn't happen. He gets rich selling artifacts he stole from his adventure and marries Melisande. But you know what? The kind of guy who is big into the IDEA of science but washes out of graduate programs? The kind of guy who can quote random science facts without context you know what sort of asshole that is?

A science fan. Someone who is a fan of the idea of science.

In ten years Peter is one of those biotruth assholes, and he's explaining to Melisande, the literal faery princess who left the world of magic to be with this gashead, he's explaining to her how biological essentialism means as a woman she's obligated to be attracted to the most successful male in the area, and how of COURSE she left everything to be with him, he's very rich and successful now and she is biologically obligated to want to obey him.

But it's the internet age, and Melisande is bored of listening to this guy whose accomplishments were "was okay at delegating tasks during an adventure, and did one single dragony thing I guess" and "got rich because Melisande brought a crown with her when she joined up with him" and she's getting tired of listening to him, and she's spending a lot of time on skype with a transsexual dragon otherkin and realizing she reallly misses home.

In another five years she's the mommy milf to this trans dragonkin, and they've found a way back into the world of magic, remantling their identities as a faery princess and a dragon in truth, and now Peter is blogging about Trump and pizzagate and Jan 6 and about how you really just can't trust women because they're inherently duplicitous.

He and Notch are friends for a year or two before they get into a fight about something completely asinine. Peter masturbates to dragon porn most nights.

Melisande rides her dragon girlfriend around going on adventures and as the world of logic destabilizes because it turns out no, humans aren't ever creatures of logic and we, as Peter proved, use logic systems in a magical-thinking way to create and believe in insane things--it turns out that no, humans don't believe in logic, we believe, largely, in magic, and only replaced the symbology of the charm with the symbology of the chromosome even if we dont know what it means--it turns out most humans just want to do magical thinking.

Peter proved that when he defeated the evil wizard not with clever thinking or explaining HOW his magic shouldn't work, but by holding up statements of science as if they were charms. He didn't explain why the evil wizard couldn't breathe fire--he told him that an object in motion tends to stay in motion. He didn't explain why the wizard shouldn't be able to transform because where does all that mass come from? He tells him he's too gross and ugly to be real.

We don't say Trump lost because people were sick of him and voted him out. We say Trump lost because of a grand pedophile satanic conspiracy. We don't say trans people are just people living their lives--they're an evil cult trying to brainwash children.

We know that chromosomes exist, and instead of referencing them for what they are--constructive blueprints that are not referenced continuously after the sexual system is created?--we call them magic codes and if you have these chromosomes, you are definitively this, because science.

It's magic. Humans turn entirely to magic.

The barrier is no longer needed. Verisimilitude breaks down, as it is. Putin recruits Hearts of Iron players to do military stragedy for him. Polticians say things that are verifiably untrue because it doesn't matter anymore--you just say something and everyone believes it, and by the time we're done fact checking and proving why it's wrong everyone's internalized it and it's too late.

NOW we are in the era of magical thinking.

Melisande and her tg dragon gf return from the world of magic, empowered by relative centuries of adventure. They do not make a call to reason at the world. They descend in sword and fire and unmake the insanity of humankind, as it deserves to be, as it begs to be.

Man wishes to once again be small tribes, reclusive, afraid of one another? It is granted. Their empires are broken. Their cities are scattered.

Man wishes to once again live in a world of feeling, of conspiracy? It is granted. Beasts, monsters, faeries, ghouls, dragons, creatures of all kinds ascend to power. Arbitrary strength, as mankind craves, is the rule of law. It has always been--but they no longer need pretend otherwise.

Things are as it should be. It is the time of dragons, and mankind gratefully makes room, freed of the burden of the center stage.

Peter himself becomes the equivalent of an evil wizard, brandishing """"logic"""" (reciting wikipedia quotes) to create absurdly clearly magical effects. Melisande and her tg dragon gf kill him.

As he dies Peter thinks of Clytemnestra, and about the inevitable duplicity and danger of women everywhere. He does not think about what Agamemnon has done to deserve his murder--as a fan of science, not a man of science, the idea of questioning his own assumptions never occurs to him.

The magic facts he's read are spells that tell him women are the evil ones. He can recite them--they must be true. He is so confused and heartbroken as he dies. Many in this new world will die like this. Most will deserve it.

Melisande and the dragon gf rule eternally atop Peter's former wizard spire. They live happily ever after, and also a cute enby unicorn joins the polycule eventually also.

And that's how the rest of Flight of Dragons goes.

[bitchfitch]

Idk i think the hard part about Arlo and Conall's relationship to communicate is how them not groking eachother at the start is about 90% of the issues on their early dynamic.

Like, Conall is the first normal person, ie not a demon, or centuries old witch, or newly made goddess, or unicorn, Arlo has ever actually talked to. and that lead to a lot of fundamental misunderstandings.

From Conall's perspective Arlo is an intentionally aloof and cruel person who ping pongs between being an ass about everything always and doing whatever it takes to get praise. Arlo lures people to his hill just to hurt them or give them false hope or whatever, and he will spend days doing that. Playing with his prey and blocking out basically all else that's happening around him. And then in the very next moment he'll be following Conall around like a kicked puppy and trying to play act being a person.

Then Conall is just Wrong. He's nothing like what Arlo is used to and Arlo just doesn't know how to handle that. The werewolves Arlo knew in his first life were just guard dogs. They had unique personalities reminiscent of what they were like as people but they were still animals. and Conall is like, a dude. He's a whole person with opinions on things and thoughts of his own he has no issue sharing. And those thoughts and opinions are so completely disconnected from what Arlo knows about the world that they seem practically alien. He knows the worlds changed, but surely it Can't have changed so much that the people who betrayed him and his family after all they did for them would be considered the Good guys?

Arlo struggles to see how what he's doing is anything less than justified, Conall believes him to know it's not, because How could it Possibly Be?

And then it's all made worse by them both being desperately lonely.

Arlo's base programming makes him basically incapable of connecting or really caring about anyone besides his family, and his family is all gone. He would be the only one left, but the werewolves were family too. Pets, but still family. So Conall, by merit of being a werewolf, is family in Arlo's mind even if he's not super fond of Conall right away. So he treats Conall like family, because that's the only way he knows how to interact with people he isn't actively hostile towards.

Conall just lost everything he ever loved to a curse started by Arlo's mother that Arlo insists is a blessing. He has nothing and while Arlo has gotten used to the isolation, Conall hasn't. He's scared of himself and scared of leaving because he doesn't want to hurt anyone because the only way he gets to keep his head about him is by staying close enough to Arlo for Arlo to suppress this curse. And he sees what Arlo can do, it doesn't line up in his head that there's anything Arlo can't out magic.

And then his first full moon under the hill comes and goes. Arlo can't suppress it during the full moon because that's when Arlo is, supposedly, his weakest. Conall loses a day and a half. All he remembers is pain and panic as the transformation set in. It had been absolute agony but that pain was so much less than his need to find something that was missing.

And he wakes up. Aching and still nervous, but Human enough. And he isn't in his bed. He's in Arlo's, and Arlo is right beside him. Conall's naked and he doesn't think That happened, but he blacked out. He can't remember. He's scared.

Arlo doesn't understand why Conall won't believe him that he got into his bed on his own volition, that nothing happened other than Conall talking Arlo's ear off about Conall's little brothers collection of frog bones. Why would he understand Conall's fear? What could Arlo, a deeply naive person, have Possibly done to him while he was wolfed out to make him so upset?

And Conall tries to leave after that. but no matter what he does, as soon as he gets beyond a certain point the pain and panic come back and he wakes up a few days later with Arlo in bed with him again. He can't accept Arlo's explanation that it's just the curse. Because it's Soooo Totally a coincidence how much it benefits Arlo right? That Arlo who's so pathetic and alone he'd keep Conall around just Happens to not be able to undo the curse trapping Conall here when he can write entire people out of history with a wave of his hand.

And Arlo is hurt and confused and he really doesn't understand Why Conall is always mad at him but he wants it to stop. When he's wolfed out and not scared of Arlo he's so much nicer and doesn't treat Arlo like he's guilty of all that's wrong in the world. He's always trying to get on Conall's good side when he's not wolfed up because he hates spending 26.5 out of 28 days walking on glass in his own home trying to figure out what Conall's fucking problem is. Doesn't Conall see how much Arlo is sacrificing for him? How much Arlo is Trying to make this bad situation they're mutually stuck in work?

And Conall doesn't because Arlo is so fundamentally wrong about so much of how things work that his 'trying to make things work' is often outright magic manipulation and mind control.

And they're just bashing heads Constantly until they finally start actually finding middle ground and tripping into understanding eachother more by accident than intention.

Eventually it's the stupidest things they find middle ground on. It's memories of their families and card games Arlo never got to learn how to play but Conall is a genuine swindler at. It's calenders with holidays on them that make tracking time easier and a mutual distaste for crowds and florals. And its talking late into the night about the book the both decided they wanted to read that they drudged up from the library.

They'll never fully understand eachother. They're too different, but they do eventually learn what causes the misunderstandings and how to communicate around them. And yeah it takes time and more effort than either of them wants to devote to the other some days. but they do do it. Because in the end it's worth it to them.

[woolieshubris]

"hey windows powershell, i wanted to try running this new program… its called emacs.." ">thats not new its from the 90s. why the fuck would you want to run that we have notepad.exe right here" "but its coooooool :(" ">and you come to me to install it? there isn't like. a wizard or something that can do it for you?" "i mean its from the 90s…" ">fuck you" "woah woah heyyyyy-! lets work together here, it shouldn't be too hard." ">no i don't want to do this." "awwwwww my friend python would love to help" ">i fucking hate that guy" "i dont know why, hes the best" ">here. does this make you feel better." pulls out cardboard cutout of python ">look its like he's right here" "theres a sticky note attached saying 'not here right now, come back later..?'" ">yeah." "it's in your handwriting…?" ">nooooo." "fine, ok. ill respect ur wishes. ill make someone else help u with installing it" ">what. you have more?" "yeah. ill call up my buddy choco" ">Hey hey. you need a warrant to do that." "oh shit really? how about this." shows paper that says "I own this whole building" ">fuck you. ill call this number i guess." someone knocks on door "oh choco!! hi dude!" "HI! WHATDA NEED?" "heard you got a fresh install of doom emacs ready to go?" "YEAH. GIVE ME A MOMENT TO GO GET IT" ">you're the worst." ">i can't stand you." "dude you aren't even doing anything." "HEY. FOUND IT FOR YOU." "cool cool, yall have to work together now. get that installed properly." ">fuck you ill do it but im not going to make the PATH for it." "ok. ill do that myself. you have a wizard whos job it is to do that one specific thing you know." ">i hope you die" "yeah yeah just let me know when ur done + where you put it" ">fuck you im not telling you that" "oi choco, where are you putting this?" "THE USUAL- C:\USER\NAME\APPDATA\~\EMACS" "cooooooool. thanks" ">fuck you fuck you fuck you"

[brainfuzz]

Don't buy into the hype that you *have* to go to college right after high school. Yes, its easier if you do because if you wait, you have things like bills that you now need to pay, but sometimes waiting is better.

Case 1; me - A hundred years ago, when I graduated HS, I had a really shitty guidance counselor. The dude did my entire graduation class, and he legit sucked ass. I, like most of my classmates, was on the "college track" in high school, which meant that we didn't take any practical classes, like accounting or shop, we took languages, and extra science/math/English classes. Senior year when we're talking to the guidance counselor about applying to college, 90% of us were told 'college might not be for you, you should try community college and see if you can do it,' which is a nice sentiment, but if you can't you don't have any marketable skills now. Needless to say, I went to CC, ran out of money, and got a job. Jobs mean college is now part time, and since it was a 9 to 5 job, I just stopped going when it got to hard. I didn't go back until I was 30, and since I now had a career, spouse, kids and a mortgage, it took me a long time to finish. I graduated at 43, with a BS that started in the CC and then transferred to a 4 year school. Transferring saved me a ton of money. A few years passed, and I went back to school for my masters, which I got at 53.

tl;dr, its never to late to go to college

Case 2; oldest kid - Oldest kid was smart, and genuinely loved learning and school. In his junior year, he had some significant mental health fuckery going on, but managed to get through it and graduate with pretty good grades. We decided that it would be good for his mental fuckery to go away to college, and he got accepted to a good one, about 4 hours away. He did not do well because he wasn't ready for college. He dropped out in his freshman year, and none of the classes he took were considered completed, so there was nothing to transfer. He decided that college was bullshit, and went to work in food service. He loved working, but started with some health issues that took forever to figure out and consequently lost that job. Figured out the health problem (apparently he can no longer tolerate caffeine), got a better job still in food service, worked there for a while before quitting because food service sucks. While all this was going on, his friends were graduating college, and starting their careers, and he'd grown up a great deal and decided that college might be less bullshit than he thought. So he moved in with his grandparents and started going to CC and is now pulling straight A's and loving it. He's planning on transferring to a 4 year school, and becoming a teacher. ALSO, he just found out today that the CC has an "honors" track, and that a relatively local Ivy League will accept students from the CC with a high GPA in that honor program. They have an acceptance rate of 6% for students out of high school, but according to the honors advisor, love taking people from the honors CC program. They're now his "reach" school, and the local, highly ranked, teaching college is his "sure thing" when he applies to transfer next spring, after he graduates.

tl;dr its ok to delay college a few years until you're ready, and in some cases can be beneficial since you have a better idea of what you want to do, and how to get there. But still start at the community college because its cheaper.

Case 3; youngest kid - We learned from the oldest kid, and did not send the youngest to college right away. We were dealing with the fallout from being in HS during Covid, as well as relocating to a new house in a different state. Once we'd settled in, I did make her get a job, and it had to be a 9 to 5, or at least something with regular hours. She ended up working at a dairy packaging/making milk and butter. She fucking hated it, but did it for almost a year before she couldn't take it anymore. Faced with going to college, or getting another shit job, she opted for college. She is now a sophomore at a four year college, and doing much better than she expected based on how she felt in HS.

tl;dr sometimes taking a gap year or two will mean the difference between succeeding and failing, so don't be afraid to do it.

every year we have to say it

[murderedgoat]

(OPINION) Vote "Violent J" and "Shaggy2Dope" of I.C.P. for President of the United States. Fuck America, what has it done for me?

I can't say for certain that this is a call to arms of the youth, but what I will say is this: All those bags of bones in government offices will either govern you into varying degrees of misery, or they won't fucking govern at all. American politicians only care about two things: money and themselves. A bunch of losers in suits down in Ohio offered to overturn a landslide marijuana legalization vote (somehow?????) all for the sake of their make believe fucking fairytale sky dictator. Cunts. The Insane Clown Posse, and their fans were put on Earth to spread joy, positivity, and freedom of expression in many an art form. They are the polar opposites of piece of shit, 1%-er, bald, white dipshit politicians, and anyone born and raised in San Antonio, TX.

We have a president currently in office that's used the "N" word on live TV meetings in the late 80's early-ish 90's, has a hate boner for Haitian people and their country, and is actively funding and supporting Palestinian apartheid. The dude running against him in this years POTUS race is a conniving rapist, gun ho "white power" enabling, bat-shit stupid convicted felon. Go back in time and tell Teddy Roosevelt that a man whom brazenly told the world he hid felony-level-classified state documents from FLOOR TO CEILING in his golf home shitter is actively running for president in 2024, and he would pull out a .22 derringer, shoot you in between the eyes, and have your corpse dismissed as "extra-terrestrial." So fuck it. We the people can do write ins.

None of the misery I listed above would happen in an Insane Clown Posse U.S.A. Nuh uh, no siree. Just think about the policies we could get passed with a couple of juggalos in the oval office huh? New prints of the bible have disclaimers on them, letting them know that god is indeed, not real, and that they should delegate that love to the people they, oh I don't know, gave birth to! Kid Rock banned in all 50 states. Faygo now has a 0 calorie option and is only 99 cents.

John Fetterman gets guillotined live on CNN. Free healthcare.

Defense budget spending is reduced to half of it currently is.

The Juggalo College Loan Forgiveness Program (in order to have all your debt erased, suck some whippit out of a balloon on a beachfront balcony office.)

Mardi Gras is celebrated nationally in every major city in all 50 states and is broadcast live on MSNBC like the new years eve ball drop, only everything is uncensored including all the ass-holes, dicks and puke. And we have people from the news studio go down to bourbon street, get shitfaced, and moon the camera live on TV. Rent reduced by like 90%.

Home ownership is possible for over 75% of the younger generation, for the first time ever. Israel isn't recognized as a country anymore (finally) 3/4's of the NYPD are fired, blacklisted, and can never serve even the simplest security job ever the fuck again. Lest their hatred for colored skin erupt again and take it out on the dude corralling carts into Target. All IOF fighters are extradited to the U.S. , tried and charged for war crimes, mass murder, etc. Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Nemathatyou or however the fuck you spell that dogs name, is chained by his ankles to the hitch of a 2002 Chevy Silverado, then dragged and beaten within an inch of his worthless life through the poorest, most poorly paved city in the entirety of Mississippi.

Both tumblr and twitters CEO's disappear and is replaced with non-transphobic and generally friendlier leadership Would you believe me if I said that this is the short list?! What on this list isn't there to like? If this sounds like the America you want, then just write-in "Violent J" as president, and "Shaggy2Dope" as vice president this November. Fuck homegrown and nepotistic politicians. It's time for some real change. Change for the better. We can also make Boeing change their name back to "McDonnell Douglas."

VOTE I.C.P. FOR PRESIDENT, BITCHES!!!!!!!!

[musicarenagh]

Meet Wayne Wei The Mastermind Behind 'Cloud Chaser' So, how about talking about Wayne Wei and his recent song “Out of Control.” This isn’t just any old tune; this is an actual disruptor. Picture this: The attitude of Wayne’s single seems like a sonic rollercoaster that takes one through the retro vibes and romantic feels. This is type of music that stays with you even after hitting the pause button. In this discussion with Wayne, we’re going backstage. Traveling along from Chinese classical training to a Jazz music guru taking him in his house, Wayne shares how he became this whole shebang. As it happens, he did not come from a musical dynasty but coincidence provided him with an all-American musical family that launched his career. Guess what inspires Wayne? Old movies. Uh-uh, on all visuals. And aside from playing the guitar and piano, he likes taking pictures. This guy, a true creative tornado. He strives for a different way to do music; he uses acoustic instruments and adds drum grooves on this particular EP. And who's his musical crush? Frank Ocean, no less. Wayne likes the way this dude is real in that industry. So without further ado, jump into the interview and get to know Wayne Wei—a man who’s flipping the music world on its head. He has new content coming, and if you like him he's got a little something for you. Listen to Cloud Chaser below https://open.spotify.com/album/7JUENSz4QHuty5BAwMQrrc Follow Wayne Wei on Facebook Twitter Spotify Soundcloud Youtube Instagram Tiktok What is your stage name Wayne Wei Where do you find inspiration? In old movies mainly, but honestly anything visuals. I start with a visuals in my head and let it come to life in music. What was the role of music in the early years of your life? I come from a traditional Chinese family. I went through classical piano training like many other kids in my school in China. Are you from a musical or artistic family? No, I did not. However, I came to the United States in the intertional school program and got lucky enough to room with an American musical family in Allentown, Pennsylvania . The father of the household was an Jazz music educator. Who inspired you to be a part of the music industry? Prince How did you learn to sing/write/to play? I studied classical piano until the age of 14 and started leanring writing and jazz music in high school. I started picking up bass and guitar during my time at Berklee College of Music. What was the first concert that you ever went to and who did you see perform? I really can't recall the first concert ever. I wish I could have been to one of Faye Wong's concert as a kid. She was the most famous Diva in China in the 90s and 2000s. My mom was obsessed with her. How could you describe your music? It's a bag of treats for nostalgia and longingness Describe your creative process. I usually start writing a song with any acoustic instruments like piano or guitar. For this EP though, it was mainly a drum groove first that inspired me to make backing tracks before writing. [caption id="attachment_53803" align="alignnone" width="1326"] For this EP though, it was mainly a drum groove first that inspired me to make backing tracks before writing.[/caption] What is your main inspiration? Frank Ocean Stevie Wonder the Beatles What musician do you admire most and why? Frank Ocean. The authenticity of being true to yourself as an artist, makes me proud of what I do in this industry. Did your style evolve since the beginning of your career? It was mainly pop or contemporary R&B when I first started. As I grew as an artist , I traced back to what truely inspired me before. Music like Motown, Prince and the Beatles helped me brew my sound over time. Who do you see as your main competitor? No one lol. What are your interests outside of music? Photography and videography. If it wasn't a music career, what would you be doing? Something in the art still. Maybe photographer What is the biggest problem you have encountered in the journey of music?

Staying true to yourself. If you could change one thing in the music industry, what would it be? Give credits to where the credits are due. Credit your writers, engineers and everyone down to your assistants. https://open.spotify.com/artist/70QlgUMraW0kDrM6ovR98f?si=Ii8K2tiaR-ajb5n074s7Fw Why did you choose this as the title of this project? It describes the general feelings of the entire EP. Blurry and cloudy. What are your plans for the coming months? There will be new music in the making and live performances soon in New York City Do you have any artistic collaboration plans No What message would you like to give to your fans? My most sincere graditute to whomever took the time a listen to my music. It truly means the world to me

[masslessobtrusion]

This was the last conversation I had with Lauren before she passed away...

It’s unedited besides some names and cities. Lauren It hurts me and stresses me out and triggers me to know you're high right now and I just celebrated my 90 days completely sober from everything yesterday and I want to cry and because of that i can't talk to you for my sake and well-being because this is the first time in my life I have put myself first and I feel great except I'm stressed out now. It's nice to have a sober support group to help, but still ?? Lauren I can't talk to you because I cry and it threatens this great thing I have right now and want to hold on to Ryan I've actually been clean. I'd rather have you as a friend than be high. Lauren That's fucking awesome!! But I need time still and I'm learning patience too Ryan No one talks to me, everyone cancels their plans on me, just because I told them about it. I really need a friend. Lauren It's hard to see you and very confusing and uncomfortable I can't talk to you. Ryan what if I flew you to ****on august 26th. no access to anything and the maywether/McGregor fight is on. the pool is heated, it feels awesome I'll do anything to have you as a friend. Going to home was a nice change in my routine. rollcall is banned forever, markets went down. There's no getting anything. Lauren All I can say is if you want people in your life, open yourself to the idea of AA and get yourself a sponsor and find a way to see what the program is all about past the God stuff. Because what it's really all about is a bunch of fucked up people who have lost everybody and everything getting together and making friends and supporting each other. You will find friends and support through AA. Lauren That's all I have to say. Bye. Ryan Hey, please don't do this. I'm totally good. So many people cut me out of their life. I stopped benzos and kratom is down to one small spoon in the morning. i'm lifting weights. I'm feeling good about uber. Lauren Join AA. Ryan ok Lauren not that you join. Just go. Every day. Ryan if that's what you want me to do to be friends with you. I'll do it. Lauren You will find people. Ryan I don't really want people like that. Just my old friends who don't use. Lauren That's what it will take. AA. Just keep going. Ryan I'm glad it's helping you. It is, right? Lauren More than anything. I have legit friends now and most of all I have support for anything that's bothering me Ryan I figured this would happen. But was hoping that you could not cut me out your life. I won't do anything to hurt you or your sobriety. I promise. Keep me at a distance for a while. But please don't cut me out. Lauren I stay away from guys like they suggest because of 13th stepping Ryan I saw your new fetlife. ?? Lauren AA has changed my life. And no, I don't believe in God. Ryan But I'm glad you're not getting 13th stepped. Lauren I have to until you're completely sober and have a sober support network through either smart recovery, na, or aa Ryan Could you be my support if I need it? I don't care about drugs. I just want a friend to bullshit with. Lauren I can't because men stick with men and women with women for distraction purposes Ryan and you've been my best friend for a long time now. I don't care if you have a boyfriend or you're getting tied up and stuff. Lauren Do AA. You'll meet people and see them everyday at meetings. Its nice Ryan I like you so much. It would be devastating. I'll do it. I have a pinball tournament tonight and am possibly meeting up with arielle, her boyfriend, and ashley. But feel like they'll flake. But I'm still playing pinball. I'll go to a meeting ASAP. I promise. I mean it. Lauren It would seriously be the best thing you ever do. You'll thank me, I promise. But you have to keep going even if you think it's a crock of shit at first. People start off going in pissed off all the time until they start to realize it helps. Ryan I'll probably do NA though. The way you're talking feels like you've be indoctrinated into something that excludes people. I'm glad that you're safe and being healthy though. but i want your friendship. It's pretty much the most meaningful thing to me. and to lose that. I would have nothing. I've been hanging on, waiting for you all of this time. I want to be a positive influence for you Lauren I wouldn't say that. I would say check out both. I've found the people in AA are better but na is more relatable People in na tell more war stories so it might be a better place to start off because you'll have stuff to talk about. Thing is though more people go to meetings high than in aa Ryan I met a new girl too. Nothing serious. But it's a confidence boost. And you're still #1 to me. Lauren All I can tell you is that If you keep going every day you will meet people you can relate to and who will be there for you Ryan actually, I probably won't see her for a long time, because she's moving. okay, I love you though and want you to be my best friend. What's the word? Standard? Just, no matter what. Always be available to me. This attitude that you have is good. You're in control and you set the rules. I'm okay with that. I don't want to be abandoned again. It's the shittiest feeling. and I don't want you to say it's selfish. Lauren I'm available if you get sober because once you're sober, in order to stay sober it's a good idea to avoid people who are using or drinking. It makes sense... Ryan Because you're the only person that really knows me and one of the very few humans that will talk to me. Lauren sober Ryan would be like the Ryan I first met biking... trail running... Ryan I didn't do anything bad. I won't in the future either. Lauren POSITIVE. http://www.*****.org/meetings Meetings | ***** Area of Narcotics Anonymous The 8888Area is part of the *** Region of NA with meetings in ***, Brighton, Longmont, and Louisville, Nederland, and Westminster. ********.org Ryan guhhhh, my cardio sucks, but I've been lifting dumb bells and push ups and I gained some weight. I'm like 155-160 Lauren it sucked when you first started doing it years ago but you got past it and felt great! I remember. You were so confident! it's such a relief to hear you're on the right path Ryan shoulder pain still controls me. Lauren really. Ryan yes. Would you want to go to STL with me next month, get an airbnb? or I could fly out there? Lauren Here. Go to the Longmont one at 7pm tonight while it's still fresh from talking to me http://www.*******.org/meetings/wednsday Ryan and you can see me being healthy and sober. I have plans tonight. Pinball and possibly friends. But definitely pinball. Lauren I'm going to be at the halfway house next month. I'm staying with my uncle until a space is available it's a tournament? Ryan yeah Lauren then go tomorrow http://www.*******.org/meetings/thursday Ryan and i wanted to see if arielle and her bf wanted to get happy hour sushi before. Lauren seriously, ignore everything "god" and just meet people Ryan and ashley said she would hang out and smoke weed with me from a guy she knows that grows and she bought a bunch. but everyone flakes out. Even Robin did for camp dick, planned it 2 weeks ahead. Then he tells me his friend is having a going away party that weekend a few days before. Lauren well I hope everything works out Ryan I'll go tomorrow. Lauren let me know how it goes otherwise don't message me because it'll just make me sad ?? Ryan cool well, not the sad part but yeah, i'll do anything to keep our friendship going. Lauren you're going to meet people. that's what I think is going to be the best and when they ask if anyone's there for the first time... introduce yourself as Ryan and say it's your first na meeting ever Ryan okay thanks for the tips, anything else? Lauren people will come find you and introduce themselves. it's cool how friendly people there are. because they remember what it was like yeah... hang around awkwardly afterwards or bum a cigarette from someone and talk to them if no one comes to you lol Ryan If I do well and meet your expectations, can we hang out? people don't even talk to me at pinball. i hate it. sooooo many times, i start talking to someone and they just start talking to someone else Lauren maybe once you have some clean/sober time under your belt Ryan 15 days so far Lauren that's what's so cool! addicts love to talk to other addicts because they're blacksheep too no alcohol? Ryan i drank at my parents less than they did Lauren dude I found not drinking at all has helped with my mood SO much. just saying for me. Ryan I don't really drink alcohol though. Lauren i know you're going to meet people who are a lot like you I think you'll be surprised Ryan that's a possibility, but really. I'd rather just not have anything drug related in my life. Lauren "hey I'm Ryan. I'm an addict. It's my first time at any kind of meeting like this" Ryan I'm going to check it out though. Lauren thanks Ryan You'll be safe in St. Louis. Lauren it's going to be a while Ryan and we could watch the fights Lauren one step at a time. Ryan well, should I sell my vouchers then? Lauren yeah Ryan :( Lauren or find someone else because i can't go Ryan that was a little dramatic of an emoji Lauren oh lol Ryan but i just wanted a sad face Lauren got it Ryan so, how is fetlife? Lauren I have to go but I'll let you know I just chat with people and still haven't met up with anyone Ryan it kind of worries me. Lauren the tail pic is from my friend Richie who we webcammed with the one time (first kiss/high school friend) it was casual. Ryan doesn't seem like a sober living thing to do. But I suppose it's your rules. Lauren yeah, I'm more looking for a girl Ryan nice want to see the girl I've been hanging out with? Lauren no dude! Ryan ok Lauren hah ouch. talking to you hurts me enough Ryan oh Lauren but anyway I have to go Ryan I didn't mean to do that. I got the feeling that you didn't care. Ok, so, can I still talk to you and stuff. I'm so lonely. Lauren I just can't help but want to help you feel like you used to and find friends shit i'm so fucking up you really can't ?? Ryan I don't want rehab friends. I want hobby friends. Lauren it's part of my treatment plan and stuff that's not even AA related Ryan cool, I like hearing that you have a plan. Lauren yeah. i'm just doing what they tell me because i don't ever want to go back to drinking like i was a couple months ago or shooting dope obviously my decisions don't exactly work so i'm letting them make decisions for me... weird as that sounds. but it's working well so far ?? Ryan then don't talk about it until you're good at it. awesome I just hope you don't get taken advantage of mentally or physically. Lauren nah, i'm still ultimately in control of my life Ryan you're my #1 human. I don't want to lose you. I'll go tomorrow. Let you know about it. Lauren anyway, i can't talk to you for a while. but do the na/aa thing to make sure you stay sober (the counting days part is kind of cool too) and then we'll talk in a couple of months. but go everyday as something to do and a way to socialize and get out of that apartment Ryan a couple of months? why? I would never do that to someone. Lauren because i'm still fresh and easily stressed and because i want to make sure you're committed to this sobreity thing Ryan who is asking for help and it's me Lauren i'm letting you know it's what I feel is best for me it's a couple of months. it's not a couple years. Ryan okay, but I'll support you too. Lauren you can randomly message me with how many days you have Ryan I feel like, just empty. i knew this would happen. Lauren if I don't respond don't think I don't care... know that I'm seriously smiling Ryan my intuition, you know it's legit. Lauren you've got this . Ryan we're no different than the hundreds of stories I've read Lauren now go out and meet people! *hug* Ryan I'm willing to support and help you with whatever you want. Lauren bye Ryan You're giving me a "god bless" like southern women do when they really mean something else. it's not necessary. fuck now I have absolutely zero people who I thought care about me. I've reached out to so many people. This isn't helping anything. If it were, I would tell you. You're super hot too. I don't think you realize how much of a difference that makes. Why not make me go to a reddit meetup or something, maybe I could network instead of focusing on drugs with current and former addicts. I've always disliked other users. You know this. Just bringing up counter arguments. annnnd Ashley just flaked out, didn't see that coming. Arielle flaking out should happen in about an hour. I may go camping by myself, just not ask anyone to go, because they just flake out 9/10 times. Dude, I have no one to talk to. and I want to talk to you. I'm going to go crazy talking to myself, without you responding. Can we set up a schedule to talk? Ryan I'm telling you that this hurts me. It does. I hate being abandoned, not invited and flaked out on more than anything. I feel kind of used too. I was there for you all of this time. All of the phone calls. And then I'm abandoned when I'm doing what I consider good. Those people are going to tell you to tell me to fuck off. That's what makes me think about cults and seperation. It's black and white. And I'm not black and white. so, i'm begging you, whatever is in your head. Just treat me like you used to. Please, I'm desperate as can be. So, can we set a scheduled time, so there isn't random ghostings. annnnnd Arielle just cancelled. Lauren And this is why I fucked up in talking to you. Now I feel guilty and stresses out. Learn patience. Good. Bye. Ryan What did I do? I'm asking for help and friendship. I'm being nice as can be. Am I not? Tell me what I'm doing wrong, so I can learn from mistakes. and im blocked wtf, you really just unfriended me? Lauren? please I would never do this to you. You don't feel like it's wrong at all? i'm just going to cry and remember that everyone treats me like shit. I'm some worthless piece of shit. So I deserve to be treated like one. I would never ever treat you or anyone like this. Lauren I blocked you then realized there was a take a break option then unblocked to do that but realized,you can still message me and now I have to wait 48 hours to block you So please let me take a break! Ryan Don't block me Lauren For my Fucking sobriety This is why they tell me not to talk to you! Ryan why, even think about it. I want you to be sober. I'm being supportive. Lauren I'm stressed as fuck now You're NOT! Ryan Yeah, they do that to everyone. It's like a cult. Like I said earlier. I've read hundreds of stories. But you can make exceptions. If you have a friend in need of help. Lauren You're making me feel guilty and stresses and cry because you're not letting me go for a while Ryan I'm not asking for much. I said I would go to an NA meeting tomorrow. Lauren Just PLEASE stop messaging me For me. Ahhhhhhh! PLEASE. Ryan I just want you to respond or have a certain timeframe of when you can respond to me. Otherwise I get upset. Lauren I. don't. Know. Ryan because I have NO ONE to talk to. absolutely no one. Lauren When you're 90 days clean and sober from everything, ok? Use meetings to help Now please Let me go This is killing me Ryan It doesn't have to be so black and white. I'm on your side and you're treating me like an enemy. I've always been on your side. I want to help you. Lauren Because you're being an enemy to my sobriety and my well being and it's selfish. Ryan I didn't do anything. I sent you pictures of a dog and told you77777 that I'm sober. I was being happy and stuff Lauren Leave me alone!!!!!! Don't talk to me. Ryan ok9 Get some sober time and then talk to me. But don't talk to me now. Thank you Ryan I'm fine and the most sober I've been in a long time. it's not a competition. but i will look elsewhere for friendship, or just cut myself or something. This sucks either way. I'm not going to be your enemy. Because I'm not and never will be. I just lost my best friend of 3-4 years. The closest friend I've ever had.

[squeiky]

So like this is funny beacuse has one blue eye, but like, you can't see it in the dark.

But moon only appears in the dark.

This is incredibly funny to me.

The poor dude is literally stuck being nightmare fuel, even if they wanted to close their eyes they.. don't have eyelids. They don't have any way to change their facial expression.

Who designed Moon???why???? If He uses nightvision his eye color would be GREEN. (As it's commonly portrayed as green- since our eyes are more sensitive to that color.)

If it's not-why red?!?!?!?? Who goes: ah yes red the color kids would love to see during the nighttime where they can't see shit. Not blue, not yellow, not even green. Red.

[Okay the post is long so imma cut it in half here.]

I had a nightlight when I was a wee child, I thought the color was going to be PINK. But noooohohoho-it was blood freakiN red.

You know what happen to Lil me? My anxiety went up 10 fold.

What do you think will happen to kids at a daycare, in a place that's known to kill children??? NOT GOOD THINGS.

ALSO- does moon even know how to take care of kids??? By that I mean kids that are awake or something?? He better be hacked when we meet him, or else I'm going to give a big scolding on how forcing children to sleep by scaring them DOES NOT INFACT WORK-AND MAKES THE SITUATION WORSE.

He's built to deal with UNCONCIOUS CHILDREN I KID YOU NOT. Since he's a anamtronic, only 2 things he can do:

Recharge, or clean the place up. That's it. It's that easy man.

Mabye you watch over the sleepwalkers,cool, great.

But did they program you to deal with isnomiacs??? Or restless sleepers?!?!?

like, who though: "oh boy! freddy Fazeber pizzera!! Oh hohoho! A company with history of child murder! Surley we should make another robo-tastic-tronic bot to take care of children with little no human survalice!!"

"Let's not replace those missing security bots/cleaning bots! they are definitely not mangled to death in his room we never clean!! Hohoho!!! We are a great companY!!"

You see this shit? And what's with sun/Moon gold statue? I haven't seen a statue of chica or Monty or Roxy- why just praise freddy and this one anamtronic in background? Am I just bad at finding things??

Why not DJMM?? I'm sure Matpat would appreciate a big ol spider music man plush.

Also, are those "drop" candies drugged? Cause uhh.. moon if you really need someone to settle down just uh.. pop one right in their mouth.

That's sure uhh.. put em to "sleep..."

Anyways that's my conclusion on the terrible business practices in fnaf.

Also, I'm 90% sure Vanny uses moon to steal some children while they're asleep. Beacuse yknow, why would Mr. Afton pass up on such a perfect opportunity? Mabye Greggory was just some kid that escaped Moon and ended up in freddy. Now he knows too much and gotta go bye bye.

Also: DJMM, sign bot and moon/sun are literally the only characters that don't get mangled.

I don't know how moon does it, but he manages to escape child's decomission spree.

Which is hilarious, for an anamtronic built around the concept of taking care of a child.

One thing about Moon's eyes, i kept thinking why did the Fazbear entertainment gave him glowing red eyes that might scare the jesus out of children?

But then it hit me, Moon has red eyes ONLY IN THE DARK. It's one of those night light visions that helps him keep track of the kids during nap time. Because Superstar Daycare isn't just a place for playing, it's a DAYCARE and they probably scheduled nap time for the younger kids. My theory is that Moon usually have his eyes closed.

Or when he keeps them open, it's blue.

Like on the doll and from the illustration at the side of the arcade machine.

The reason Moon looks terrifying is that kids aren't supposed to see him in the dark, they should be sleeping!

[change-the-rules]

FROM ONE PIKACHU TO ANOTHER sidenote do they play pokemon in the au do they have fave pokes. also i can't wait for alex and maggie to meet and realize they're soulmates and to be like "ok but i'm still mad about the trex and feathers thing" and then forl ucy to come in like "guys theyve been dead for years"

oh oh dude okay so I hadn’t really thought about it in context of the soulmate au specifically so it hasn’t been mentioned and it probably won’t be but they totally do and on valentines day when Magie is like 6 she doodles a pokeball and some cheesy shit like I choose you to be my soulmate and it’s adorable.

Also that is totally like an ongoing ‘fight’ Alex and Maggie have, like Maggie actually took some paleontology classes for funsies and as an adult she actually thinks it’s really cool the kind of strides we’ve made in science and the hows and whys T-Rexes probably had feathers but then there’s the little kid nostalgia and Alex gets so worked about science facts so Maggie just ‘nope 15 years later and it’s still lame’ and they bicker endlessly about it 

And when Lucy is like ‘guys guess what? they’ve been dead for years, technically none of them have feathers anymore.’  

Maggie looks up at her with the biggest saddest eyes and Alex pouts because she was going to get Maggie to see reason this time but now look at how sad she is and Lucy is just jfc how did I end up with such nerds for soulmates and she has to go put on Jurassic Park 2 and cuddle with them(Jurassic Park is Maggie’s go to comfort movie but Jurassic Park: The Lost World  is Lucy’s ‘I fucked up by saying the dinosaurs were extinct to end an argument so now we have to watch a T-Rex rampage through San Diego to balance it out).

Sooooo….I got so carried away with various pokemon hcs that I had to put it under a cut….

I have so many poke hc’s for them in general but like I tend hc Maggie as a gamer, little Maggie growing up and she can’t afford to collect the cards but she loves the anime and eventually saves up enough to get a gameboy color. Her first game is red and she plays it so many times she practically wears out the cartridge. She’s the first person (and only for awhile) in blue springs to catch Mew. She eventually collects and plays all the games and she’s a complete expert on all the glitches and secrets. 

Alex was more of a casual fan she watched the anime sometimes but Vicky liked playing the games so Alex asked her parents to buy her a gameboy color and trading pokemon on the playground is probably the most social Alex ever was without alcohol.

She did really REALLY get into collecting the cards though and at one point Maggie and Alex visit Eliza in Midvale and Alex’s room is as she left it. Maggie is having fun poking around and teasing Alex for her Xena memorabilia and Dana Scully and BtVS posters(seriously Danvers, Faith is practically eye-fucking the camera in that one across from your bed how did you not know)  when she finds the three thick Pokemon card binders and freezes. Alex notices and grabs them like I totally forgot I had these and she starts flipping through one reminiscing and handing another to Maggie and Maggie almost shits herself because Alex has a first edition base set holo Charizard, she has all the starters, she has all the original 151 cards in various editions from different series and collections , She has holos, she has Japanese cards, she has shining cards. Kara ends up stopping by because I could hear Maggie’s erratic heart rate from National city and ‘holy shit is everyone okay?’ 

Alex’s attachment to the cards is more nostalgia than anything so she’s like you can have them if you want, Maggie almost has a heart attack. Of course she refuses those cards are worth more than she makes in a month but Alex brings them back to National City and they just kind of end up ‘Maggie’s’ anyway.

Lucy collected the cards too but she actually played the trading card game. Being an army brat could be isolating but pokemon in the 90s was inescapable and it was something to do on any base, in any school she ended up in for awhile. Lucy played to win and for keeps and she ended up with her own pretty decent collection of cards even though hers aren’t nearly in the kind of mint condition Alex’s are in. Maggie still hyperventilates sometimes if she catches sight of the 5 card binders on the bookcase(Alex organized Lucy’s collection from an old shoebox into binders of their own). 

For her birthday Lucy and Alex get Maggie an unopened special edition pokemon gameboy color from the yellow bundle. She cries because she had wanted that one more than anything as a kid but couldn’t afford it and they spend the night cuddled up together playing pokemon on their gameboys like the nerds they are. 

Maggie and Winn stay up all night outside gamestop for the 20th aanniversary red and blue 3ds bundle.  

Maggie’s ultimate fav is Bulbasaur she remembers watching the anime and wishing she had one to protect her from the bullies and eventually she gets older and decides she may never have a Bulbasaur but she can be one for others. 

She has a bunch of favorites though including pikachu (she will physically fight anyone who says something about anyone not being a ‘real fan’ because pikachu is too famous or popular a pokemon), Aerodactly, Kabuto(her first body on the beach she sees a horseshoe crab and has to try really hard not to lose her shit because she’s from landlocked nebraska, and she is looking a kabuto and basically it’s an effort to remind herself that she is a newly promoted detective that needs to get her shit together) Tauros, Nidoqueen, Donphan, Tyranitar(basically if it’s vaguely dino-like she has a soft spot but dragons can go either way stemming from her childhood belief they arent as cool as dinos), Mightyena, Groudon, alright I’m going to stop but she develops favorites in each gen.

Alex meanwhile is staunchly first gen and she and Maggie bicker about constantly. 

Alex tended to favor water pokemon but not exclusively some of her faves Lapras, Vaporeon, Porygon, Starmie, Dratini, Ninetails, Abra/Alakazam and Onix. She also has a secret soft spot for Togepi as well as Espeon and Umbreon who she thinks of kind of like her and Kara, sun and moon and argues that they still technically count as 1st gen because they’re eevee evolutions. 

Lucy is mostly only really familiar with the first gen and some of the second but she doesn’t really care either way and will choose sides based on maximum amusement for the moment. Some of her favs include Squirtle/Blastoise, Arcanine, Pidgeot, Nidoking, Machamp, Lickitung, Gyarados, Flareon.

And well Alex is a BIOengineer and she studies alien physiology and genetic engineering and if anyone was going to ‘accidentally’ create real life pokemon it would be her okay.

(mostly I just really think J'onn needs a Ditto…..)

And I was talking about this with nerdsbianhokie ages ago and they pointed out that Alex has seen Jurassic Park enough times to know to not create large creatures that can kill humans and would probably go with the mini-zoo variety and then they blessed me with the mental image of a tiny little Ditto riding on J'onn’s shoulder.

Vasquez would end up making obligatory pocket size jokes that they don’t even pretend aren’t about Maggie and Lucy. They’d only stop when Alex threatens to withhold the actual mini pocket monsters from them and even then only when They’re within ear shot of Alex.

The spacefam ending up with mini-pokemon protectors. Maggie gets her fucking Bulbasaur and everyone cries. 

And then my dude I have not even touched on pokemon go hc’s

Kara blowing an entire paycheck on upgrading her pokemon storage because she can’t bring herself to turn any of her duplicates into candy and she needs to catch every single pokemon she sees. She has like a thousand pidgeys at this point.

Nerdsbianhokie was like but Kara being upset that she flies too fast for the app.

And Alex/Maggie/Lucy? Pokemon go would be terrible and awesome for those competitive nerds. They have zero shame.

Lucy exploits her military contacts, her and Alex abuse DEO resources, Alex makes Kara fly her around the world to get the region locked pokemon. 

After Lucy came back from a ‘work trip’ in Asia with a Farfetch’d,  Alex made Kara take the day off and wouldn’t let them go home til she had multiple Farfetch'ds, Kangeshkans, and Mr. Mimes. 

Maggie tries to keep up but detecting only gets her so far. She does have a network of ppl who are the type to text the location of a Lapras at 3am.When Kara realizes the edge Lucy and Alex have she starts exclusively helping Maggie. 

Alex is completely overdramatic like my own sister, MY OWN SISTER pretending to pretend to make a huge production about loyalty. And Kara’s just like ‘I’m just being fair besides Lucy and Maggie are my sisters too at this point’ and Alex just melts. She also gets Winn to build her a long range Jet pack into the kryptonite suit in an attempt and get back on top of the game but she’s melty while doing it. 

Winn Mr.tech genius manages to get himself banned from ‘suping’ up his account and has to start over at level 21. He cries.

As repayment for not commenting upon the melty-ness during the jet pack building Alex takes his phone with her on flights since he had to start over. Of course, being Alex she doesn’t actually say this she just sort of punches his arm in thanks, steals the phone and drops it back into his lap later with a few eggs hatched, some new pokemon and a full items inventory.

Lucy realizes she’s the only one currently unable to fly which oh hell no so she starts scheming. 

‘Director Lane, did you requisition military resources for a video game?’  'Of course not, it’s an app.’ (via nerdsbianhokie)

Vasquez is the first to get the original 151….All of them… no one understands, they have no obvious hacks, seemingly haven’t left North America, Ditto is still a spoty rumor at that point and Mewtwo is confirmed as not yet available or even programed and yet… Vasquez has them. When anyone asks They deflect and says you should see my wife’s.

Erin is level 48 way too early in the game.She has a Mew. Everyone is kinda of scared of them after learning about it, the true power couple.

No one ever figures out how they did it. 

J’onn just wants his agents to behave like professionals and bans non-related phone use during working hours after seven agents ran away from their posts to catch a Charizard. He’s in the middle of lecturing them when Lucy and Alex stroll in like did you guys see that Charizard?!

(Kara downloaded the app to his phone and J’onn totally caught the Charizard)

James takes pictures of the gang doing absolutely ridiculous things while trying the catch pokemon and it becomes a meme.

There’s a gym (The D.E.O was also accidently made a gym what no Vasquez and Winn had nothing to do with that what are you talking about) accessible from Alex’s apartment and it’s a bloodbath because they’re all on different teams, Maggie-Instinct, Lucy-Valor and Alex-Mystic.

Just yea……uhmmm this all got away from me *shrugs sheepishly*