#DUDE! This farmer appreciates the thought

[sharky857]

Me, thinking at the farmer getting up, every single morning, at 6 AM: *whispers* How effed up even is your sleep schedule, at this point..? :°D

[barkspawn]

Most to least likely to want children?

Hey, still alive. Sorry it took so long! More incoming!

Most to least likely to want kids:

1. Sam - He hangs out and plays with Vincent so often that it's something he's comfortable with and I can't imagine him not being excited to have some of his own.

2. Alex - He feels like a nuclear family kind of dude. He gives the excited-but-a-little-sad-it's-not-a-boy dad vibes. He'll want to play catch and such. But I also see him having a tea party with his little girl who he is way too protective of. Girls name would be his mom's.

3. Shane - Never thought he wanted kids, but he started pulling himself together and worked on his relationship with Jas. Maybe, just maybe, he can see himself on the farm with his s/o watching their little monsters run around or try to help our dear farmer.

4. Sebastian - Almost like Shane in the sense he didn't think he wanted kids considering his only exposure to younglings was Vincent. But suddenly his life plans have changed anyway - he's staying in the Valley with his farmer and is able to take more time off work. Idk, I can see him start thinking about it and/or not hating it when the farmer brings it up.

5. Elliott - He is a focused man who puts writing first. I can see him wanting kids, but I can't see him giving up writing or doing so less. A child takes so much time and is a more-than-full-time job that wouldn't be fair to dump on the farmer. He'll write about kids though.

6. Harvey - Kids are germ-infested little hosts who will get sick and bring any possible illness home. Also, what if they get sick or injured and he can't help them? What if they die and it's because he couldn't save them? No thank you.

I'd say 5 and 6 are interchangeable and tbh the whole list could be different in my brain tomorrow when I think of a different fact or idea.

I appreciate your patience in all of this.

I'm working on so much more!

[ihonestlycanttellyou]

DoL PC: Onyx the Depraved

My main save and menace to society playthrough! >:]

Cut because it got longer than expected. :p

General

Defiant, Vengeful Sadist, Drooling Masochist, Notorious Slut/Whore/Show-off/Scrapper, and Considered a terror; despite all this, still kinda liked in town.

Would be a Notorious Allfather too but the feature's not really there. :p

Beautiful, Lustful, and Asphyxiophilia traits.

Literally thrives on sick depravity, it's his favorite food.

Lives at Bailey's orphanage but never pays him, prefers to just stomp him and his goons once a week.

A bully at school but his looks and attitude make him very popular despite his more... unsavory actions.

Sending Leighton to the pillory is his favorite past time.

Celebrity chef, Bartender, Adult Shop Attendant, Model, and Brothel Star.

Got a parasite once and was never the same. Now a father of many many many slimes.

Was always an incubus but gained the Cow TF at the farm.

Escaped Remy's secret farm after becoming the farmer's prized cattle. At first, he hated his forced hybrid nature but he loves what being made into a bullboy did to his body; he's super buff and produces milk now. Score!

Escaped prison but lowkey misses pushing the other inmates and even the guards around.

His "types": older men, rich women, brats, and horrific otherworldly beings.

Somehow remembers the names of each of his slimes but not his human children.

Relationships

(Love Interests)

He, Robin, and Corrupt Sydney are bestfriends! :]

Knows about Kylar's obsession and bullies him for it, would probably only gain interest after learning about Kylar's "daddy issues". *

Fucks around with Whitney. Onyx likes the three F's: fighting, fucking, and funds; Whitney provides all three.

At first, he started working for Alex purely to spite Remy but started to genuinely like the guy as a friend.

Thinks Avery is a huge brat, wants to collar and fuck him until he stops whining about his weak standing among the other rich bastards in town. He does like getting $2K just for looking good though so he'll keep Avery around.

Has never met the You are being Hunted trio, so no opinion on Eden, Black Wolf, or Great Hawk.

*He'd love the depravity and really play into it.

(People of Interest)

Hates Bailey but would totally hit it at any given chance.

Has an oddly deep respect for Briar despite her literally being diet Bailey, not even he knows why.

Protects Darryl when working as a Bartender in her club but is mostly indifferent to her.

Absolutely fucking terrified of Harper, that dude literally altered his brain chemistry for one and then tried to take him back to the farm after he escaped.

Indifferent towards Laundry and Mickey but appreciates their business.

Oh boy, where to start with Leighton. Well- [CENSORED FOR PUBLIC SAFETY]

Only knows Niki from the studio, likes them by not by much. If he knew they worked on the farm, he'd flip.

Would charge at and trample Remy since he likes bulls so much, it'd be cathartic for Onyx despite him seemingly enjoying being a bullboy.

Credits Sam for his success as a celebrity pastry chef, still mostly indifferent towards her.

First met Wren in prison and thought he was cool, thought he was awesome when he actually went through with sabotaging Remy during Blackjack. All that admiration flew out the window when he had to suck off all of Wren's friends for his clothes back. >:/

Loves Sirris as a teacher and boss, lowkey wants to make another "sex-ed" video with him.

FUCKING HATES MS. RIVER, He is a complete delinquent so she targets him a bit. He thinks it's funny when she passes out from his antics with Whitney though.

Wants Doren biblically, even more so if she's actually a werewolf like the rumors say.

Hates Mr. Winter, bastard left him in that stupid pillory like five times. Intrigued by his interests in medieval punishment though.

Thinks Mason is kinda hot, not his type.

Never met the others.

Lookbook :D

Everyday Look x3, School, Swimming, Formal, Athletic, Sleep, and finally the Brothel fit, babeyyy!

His tattoos: a horned skull on his chest, "Paradise" beneath his pierced bellybutton with an arrow pointing downstairs (okay fine, it's canonically Size Queen but let! me! have! this!), and ofc a cattle brand on his left asscheek.

[bengiyo]

Hidden Agenda Ep 10 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Zo was mad at Pat and Joke for lying to him about Pat helping Joke pursue Zo. It took a while for Joke to give an earnest apology, but they settled once he finally did. Meanwhile, Pok was out of tolerance for his closeted existence and tried to break up with Jeng. However, Jeng dragged him to the football team to come out. I'm looking forward to the dramatic fallout of that.

Oh boy. Looks like we're getting into Zo's issues with his mom this week. He gave a complicated look when a neighbor encouraged him to become a boss to make his mom proud.

Lot of weird family energy this episode.

Ah, there it is. Zo's mom is a teacher, and he's grown up under pressure to perform at a high level academically as a result. That's familiar.

I actually like this. Zo's mom is nice. She does care about him and treats others well. Still, Zo clearly feels emotionally overwhelmed by her.

Oof, Jeng left his football club. Things probably felt off after coming out. This is why I said he messed up coming out for Pok and not himself.

I'm really into the work Aou and Boom are doing together. I like that we're seeing the fallout of coming out. It's not always pretty.

What is the deal with Trin and Wave? They feel like exes.

I feel like we had a mistranslation in the conversation with Zo and his dad, but I appreciate the dad assuring Zo that many of our problems are temporary.

Ah, so Zo has grown up being directly compared to his mom's other star students.

Curious why Zo doesn't want his parents to know he has a boyfriend.

Okay, Dunk actually did some good eye work in this scene in the bedroom.

Of course the issues with his mom go back to Puen, and how it altered the way she sees him. Fuck that dude.

Okay, the heart-shaped piece of bark lands because we just learned that Zo is the son of a farmer.

Oh right, Jamie was in Only Friends yesterday.

Finally, the backstory on Wave and Trin.

Well, I wasn't expecting Podd and Guy to fight about gay feelings.

I'm glad Zo, despite his issues with his mom, can stand up to Wave.

Back to some of the social commentary via the debate competition.

Wait, are we back to teasing about the no-kissing? I figured we forgot about that on the farm? Whatever! Get it in!

Oh no, looks like Zo's dad may get very sick or die next week.

This show meandered a bit for me, but I am enjoying the emotional core of this drama with Zo's mom. I also liked the check in with Jeng about how coming out in a more macho environment sucked for him.

[dollarbin]

Shakey Sundays #32:

Zuma, Final

My family of five often does not appreciate Shakey Sundays.

We spent 11 hours in the car yesterday and for much of the time my 15 year old daughter was running the Spodify queue. Adele belted, Lucy Dacus ruminated and Valerie June crooned from the speakers, each of them universally appreciated.

But I initially shied away from suggesting any Neil Young. My family, I'm sorry to admit, can be Shakey Shunners.

I could have played I'm the Ocean; my wife would have been happy - she'll cite that track as her favorite Neil song (after I remind her for the 451st time that Helplessly Hoping is Stephen Freakin' Stills' work, not Shakey's). But by the time Neil declared "people my age..." my 19 year old son would have asked "how long is this song?" and my 15 year old would have asked for the whole thing to be turned the hell down.

Alternatively I could have played Wrecking Ball, but my 22 year old eldest would have asked if Young regularly covers Emmylou Harris and why we weren't listening to her original.

And had I played Farmer John or T Bone everyone would have demanded my head. Seriously: I once played Light My Fire - The Doors' Life My Fire! - on a family road trip and was told by my sainted wife that doing so was "mean to everyone." And earlier this summer I went ahead and made two of my kids listen to Neil's Opera Star, thereby granting them all grounds for mocking me with disgust for the next 60 years.

And so I requested Zuma's closing track, Through My Sails, yesterday with a sinking heart. The song required playing; after all, I needed to write about it so as to finish off this entire, wonderful-for-me-at-least, Zuma project (thanks for hanging in there, by the way: if you read all six entries give yourself a pat on the back from yours truly). But I felt sure that the whole thing would crash land me into familial sighs and mockery.

But no! "This is actually a nice song, dad," offered my generous 19 year old midsong. "Yeah, it actually doesn't suck," quoth my daughter. "Helplessly Hoping is better though," offered my wife - who again had forgotten the fundamental difference between Neil the Young and Stephen the Hutt.

Through My Sails truly does not suck; rather, it's a lovely and thoughtful end to an incredibly dynamic and rich record. Neil employs his occasional bandmates Cranky, Silly and Needy to wonderful ends in the track: he did the guitar and all his singing on his own without them, then gave them a late invite. The harmonies they eventually supplied are under control for once and shimmer with warmth. But Neil's the star here: the wind in his sails allows him to chart pensive, yearning waters, considering where he is at with love and self-discovery.

15 or so years ago I attended an engagement party for my buddy Ned and his wonderful bride-to-be at his parents' house. The town troubadour had been hired for the event - the kind of guy who turns up in the corner of the pub on a Friday afternoon to cover Jimmy Buffet and Jasmine in My Mind. But Ned, who regularly navigates all kinds of tunnels and fire, had given the guy clear marching orders: play Neil Young.

And so the dude rolled out Heart of Gold, and, of course, Old Man. "Play us a deep track," I encouraged him. "What else you got?"

And then, I kid you not, Joe Troubadour played Though My Sails. Neil had, to my knowledge, performed the song just once in his own wonderfully ragged life at that point - and that was for Zuma. But suddenly there was this regular guy, sitting on a humble stool amidst cocktailed party goers, all with their shirts tucked in, and he was tracking the changes to one of Neil's great and largely forgotten songs.

I sang along that evening, unaware of all the unexpected and unfair hardships that lay ahead for my great buddy Ned, and for us all. Indeed, it took one of those hardships - we're talking Covid - for Young to remember this song himself, and finally share it with us anew during one of his fireside sessions.

Even so, this song, and the entire album that precedes it, always gives me hope. There's a lot of ugly out there, just like there's a lot of rage and worry in Zuma. But the record's beauties are vast and real.

Thanks for soaring with me into its paradise this past week.

[meme-streets]

I SAW THE KEVIN COSTNER WESTERN. here are my thoughts on horizon: an american saga, chapter 1 with mini and massive spoilers under the cut.

four movies, by the way? kevin costner, you son of a bitch, you're doing terrible things to my wallet!

first of all: gorgeous landscape shots. what can i say? i love aspen trees, i love rock formations, i love mountains. very nice costumes too, though i can't speak to historical accuracy. costner's fit goes hard as hell. the freaky brothers' fits goes hard as hell.

i also appreciate the casting–mostly of minor characters–of some people with old school western character actors faces. you know what i mean? there's some old dude at the beginning who looks a bit like jack elam though without a lazy eye. the freaky brothers' mother. this sounds like i'm calling these people ugly but i don't mean it that way.

a potential issue with actors directing their own films is that their ego gets the best of them and they make themselves too important to the detriment of the story looking at you clint eastwood. costner does not fall into this trap; hell, he's not even there for the first...forty five minutes to an hour, i can't tell.

this is the first of a series and you can tell, because almost nothing that is set up pays off at all. it is not a standalone film by any means. i generally don't like this in a movie but i get it, costner & co have several hours of story to tell and they want it on the big screens, and it does look good in a theater. it doesn't waste any of its three hour runtime and i was never bored, so i don't think there's much to be done about it. it does do a pretty decent job tying some of the plotlines together and it sets up how more will intersect in the future. i will say it ends with an admittedly very hype montage that's just a trailer for the next film(s) and i think that's corny as fuck. i have seen people complain this is three or four movies smashed together but i was able to keep up with it pretty well so i don't think it's too much of an issue.

in the line of unforgiven and the assassination of jesse james by the coward robert ford, it's one of those modern westerns where killing is brutal, unglamorous, and messy. costner unloads four or five pistol shots into a guy at close range before he finally bites it.

i've heard conflicting accounts on how the film handles manifest destiny. having now seen it, it's definitely not pro-expansionist, but some of the characters do treat it as completely inevitable, and the end of the frontier seems already strangely close at hand for a film set in the 1860s. the friend i saw it with described it as having an apocalyptic feeling and he's onto something there.

re: the above, there's a scene where a higher ranking is talking to the lower ranking army guy who keeps suggesting "stop fucking settling on apache land" and they have this conversation about the last great open space and the inevitability of farmers settling no matter how bad of an idea it is. it felt too on the nose.

blood meridian subplot? there's even a kid with them. i don't think it's definitely an intentional reference but i'm leaning towards probably.

i love marigold. shoutout to female characters who make bad and selfish decisions and are still sympathetic. she's funny as hell. she's breasting boobily. she's trying SO hard to fuck that old man.

obsessed with whatever's going on with that little blond freak wearing the pelt. why is he pissing in the creek in front of everybody. why is he trying to have hate sex with kevin costner. why is he trying to goad his older brother into kicking his ass. i guess we'll never know

oh my god, those adorable little union soldiers that lizzy whatsherface gave the cloth flowers to are definitely going to fucking die!

the british couple is so. stop acting like that.

overall: i don't know how good it was but i did have a fun time watching it.

[i-hate-spitelout-jorgenson]

thank you for speaking on the disaster final movie of the HTTYD series. as someone who mostly read the books as a kid, and had it as my favorite series and favorite movie, I am forever crushed that… idk. everything. i never watched the show, but I wasn’t thrilled with the second movie and was absolutely so disappointed by the dragons leaving in the end. additionally, after playing some of the old wii games, seeing how shit anything new related to it is is… idk. soul crushing. I would love to see an animated series made of the original, where it’s drawn elegantly but childishly, and hiccup has a tiny wretched mean little common dragon with no teeth who is super rude and demands bathroom breaks, and a traumatized riding dragon with three legs who he loves dearly. hell, I just wish dragons could speak again and were allowed to have their own desires and ambitions and were more than animals. I’ll even take the potato plothole over this shit. (how can he have been a potato farmer when a potato single normal potato is a relic and extremely important object in the 7th book smh)

as a dragon kid i love toothless but seeing our boy be brutally commercialized complete disheartens me from the series. Idk if you have any thoughts on all of this, I just appreciated your analysis of the third movie. Validates my choice not to watch it. on a similar but perhaps unrelated topic, I also didn’t watch the third movie because the third movie in the kung fu panda trilogy was TERRIBLE after the second was a masterpiece. misery and suffering abound.

BYE

Thanks dude i appreciate it! To be honest I just. i dont even really like talking about the hidden world because it makes me legit angry LMAO. yeah you are not missing out on ANYTHING from that movie, like from a character standpoint to a plot standpoint... yuck. it is pretty but like, so are jellyfish yknow?

Honestly i dont remember a whole bunch about the books but a tv show would slap SO HARD. 2d animated with strong artistic choices and such? yes please Id eat that shit right up AND itd give me an excuse to reread the books <3

[showfallmediaarchivist]

[Video transcript begins.]

[The camera appears to be in a dress-shirt pocket, roughly chest height on the average person. The lense reveals an empty area of the mall, shadows claiming the empty windows as their own. The sound of metallic footsteps are picked up, along with a light humming. The song is recognised as “The Farmer in the Dell,” or, “A Hunting we shall go.”

[A loud rustling sound is heard in one of the abandoned shops, as shadow darts across an entryway. The camera turns to face the noise.]

?: Oh, shit..who's there?!

[Voice identified: The Archivist]

?: I recognize that voice. Dear Archivist, is that you?

[Voice unrecognizable, please try again.]

A: Who?... wait a second, is that…W?

?: Must be odd to finally hear my voice. It is pleasure to finally meet you

[A figure emerges from beside a store entryway. They are covered in a black jacket, complete with a balaclava mask and red tinted glasses to fit. Their outfit is tattered and baggy. They extend their hand to shake, with the other arm grasping their stomach]

[The other takes it, its hand darting out from under the camera's lense.]

?: I did not intend to frighten you. I was getting ready to head out with this medkit. I have no more use for it, so I thought I would donate it to the sorry syndicate next door.

[The figure clenches their gut and sways forwards for a moment.]

?: Assuming I can make it there, anyways…

A: Dude, are you hurt? You bloody staggered about for a second. We have stuff there, you can use the medkit if you need it.

?: I already said I have no use for it. Use your brain.

A: People can lie about that.. If it isn't damaged, is it hunger?

?: And the last horse crosses the finish line. I’m surprised you got there all on your own, Mr. Monotone.

A: Alright, I have some stuff. Do you..want it? I'm always good at grabbing spare items?

?: I uh… “appreciate,” the offer, but given that it is most assuredly poison, I think accepting is not in my best interest. You know damn well what I’ve done, so I am honestly surprised you have yet to make a move.

A: I mean this in the most honest way possible: what the fuck are you talking about?

?: You expect me to believe you have no recollection of our phone call? Less than a month ago? I purposefully withheld information in order to gain the upper hand. Some would call such an act “underhanded.”

A: Oh, I remember all right, I still have nightmares. But, I meant the poison shit. Why would I try to kill you? I don't want you dead?

?: Well let’s see here, Señor sarcastic, I got Edgar to off himself, withheld vital information, invaded “personal privacy” (whatever that means), I threatened you, I tracked you down and could have gotten you fired or killed, I came here uninvited trying to prove something to nobody, I broke into multiple houses, I even went into-

A: -Okay slow down, breathe. Edgar's choice was because of multiple reasons, not solely you. I've withheld personal information before, for the sake of trying to help people, been threatened and had it followed through, being killed and being fired are the same thing and I'd much prefer it, AND-

[The two begin to talk over each other.]

?: I HAVE WATCHED A MAN DIE IN FRONT OF MY EYES. I TOLD DEPRESSED PEOPLE TO KILL THEMSELVES, I’VE BEEN LIVING UNDER A GODDAMN LIE MY WHOLE-

A: -I’VE KILLED THE HEAD OF THE PR DEPARTMENT. I'VE BEEN FUCKING KILLED MULTIPLE TIMES AND CAME BACK. I AM HERE AGAINST MY FUCKING WILL-

?: -WAIT A GODDAMN SECOND, SLOW YOUR ROLL, SHORTCAKE! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, YOU’VE KILLED OTHERS AND DIED MULTIPLE TIMES? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

A: Exactly what you fucking think it does. Why do you think so much of me is metal, dumbass? This place, fucking brings people back from the dead. They made me kill my friend.

[The Archivist sighs, running a hand through its hair.]

?: Goddamn. That’s uh. I can’t beat that. Congrats on being a shittier person than me, I guess.

A: not fucking happy about it, just trying to understand why the hell you'd think I poisoned something.

?: … Trust is not a language I speak, kid… That is just part of the job.

A: Do you want me to, uh, eat like half of it before you do then? To prove it ain't poison?

?: … It is a start. But you also have to eat the last bite, since some poisons settle at the bottom of containers. And you also can’t hide the can from me at any point.

[The Archivist shrugs, the camera moving in time to the motion.]

A: Fine with me, if it makes you feel safer!

?: Safe… yeah, something like that. I can deliver this after we uh,-

[The person in front of the camera lurches forwards and falls on their face, grunting in pain as they struggle to pick themselves back up.]

A: Shit, man! When was the last time you ate something fucking substantial?!

[The camera goes down, as Will kneels down beside the figure.]

[Video Transcript Ends.]

[mlobsters]

supernatural s9e14 captives (w. robert berens)

right, back to angel politics -_- and sam breaking dean's heart a little bit

sam's in his pjs, are you allergic to getting comfortable to sleep, dean? at least he doesn't have his boots still on i guess. also i appreciate the ghost assisted bunker tour

DEAN Kevin, I'm sorry. You did not choose this life. You busted your ass, you lost everything, everyone you've loved... And your reward? Getting killed... On my watch. If I... It was on me. It was my fault, and... And there's nothing I can do to make that right. I am so sorry.

--

KEVIN No, this is not happening. Didn't spend months struggling to break through the veil just to get stuck listening to Dean Winchester having a self-pity session. Didn't hear enough of those when I was alive.

thank you, kevin! made me smile. the power of dean's pity party guilt made kevin so annoyed he powered right through the veil. i was wondering about that, if closing heaven meant no people going in too, thanks for the clarification, show.

SAM You feel that? I think I felt a chill. DEAN Yeah. It's 'cause it's cold.

*rimshot*

DEAN Crowley, it's Dean. Call me when you get this. SAM Really, Dean? DEAN What? SAM That's your third unanswered voicemail. You ever think maybe he's just not that into you?

i thought y'all weren't brothers anymore, sam. no teasing!

show also circling back to mrs tran, which i didn't have a lot of faith they'd do (i mentioned recently i couldn't remember if they'd confirmed if she'd died or not)

SAM So, what, you want to give him a medal? I mean, Crowley's the one who put them in the cells in the first place. DEAN Yeah, I know. I'm just talking it out. You know, working the case. Businesslike.

laughed at the "working the case", then really laughed at businesslike

castiel, are you going to make good decisions today?

from the wiki: Sam: D. Webster? As in like Daniel Webster? Dean: Well, I know a lame Crowley in-joke when I see one. The storage lockers were rented under the name "D. Webster." "The Devil and Daniel Webster" is a 1937 short story by Stephen Vincent Benét. It is a retelling of the story of Faust in which a farmer sells his soul to the devil and is defended by Daniel Webster. The real Daniel Webster was a famous 19th century orator and senator.

dean understands this reference?? that seems.... obscure.

Shortcut to Happiness is a modernized version set in the publishing world, starring Anthony Hopkins as a publisher named Daniel Webster, Alec Baldwin as a best-selling (via the devil) but terrible author named Jabez Stone, and Jennifer Love Hewitt as a female version of the devil. This version was made in 2001, but was halted before completion, before finally being completed and given a limited release in 2007.

maybe this is why he knows of it? he's mentioned jennifer love hewitt several times before 🤪 early seasons deep cut?

1.10 Asylum Dean: Hey, Sam, who do you think is a hotter psychic: Patricia Arquette, Jennifer Love Hewitt, or you? 2.01 In My Time of Dying Dean (to Sam): Give me some ghost whispering or something! 2.16 Roadkill Dean: Sammy's always getting a little J. Love Hewitt when it comes to this.

BARTHOLOMEW But with you by my side -- the new boss and the ultimate rebel working together -- think of the message that would send to would-be dissidents. They'd finally understand that resistance is futile.

LOL the borg catchphrase. concerned castiel is going to make another epically bad decision but they got a friend to torture and kill to remind him

well that was miserable, sam telling mrs tran.

dude looks like young mark ruffalo at this angle / actual mark ruffalo

those are some spiffy lookin dressy boots for his fed getup. i like those

BARTHOLOMEW You weren't. Not then. But since then, you've slaughtered thousands of angels. You killed Malachi's man for his Grace. CASTIEL Who I was, what I did, that's not who I am.

he's making some points. lol bart let's settle this with fisticuffs. this plotline....

both of their outfits are nice

think about when they used to wear these suits...

s1e13 route 666

KEVIN Can you two... Get over it? Dudes, just 'cause you couldn't see me doesn't mean I couldn't see you. The drama, the fighting... It's stupid. My mom's taking home a ghost. You two... You're both still here. SAM Of course. Promise.

i don't care if it doesn't make sense i am on board with this. yes, make a promise to the dead boy that you'll work it out. and immediately sam walks away, of course haha. they can both go sulk in their rooms

trying to remember how sam handled it when he was trying to earn back dean's trust, i remember dean being an asshole about it though. so far dean doesn't seem to be trying to do anything in particular to earn sam's trust back (i'm not sure how you go about it anyway). but i don't even know because there's too much shit going on at once perpetually. let's get some fencemending focus.

[classicschronicles]

Hi lovelies,

I hope you’re all doing okay! Today’s entry is a bit of a random one but I was going through my camera roll (because I used up all my storage… anyways) and I found some pictures from when I went to the Louvre a few years ago and found a picture of a gorgeous sculpture. So today I thought I would tell you all about the Venus de Milo.

The Venus de Milo is an Ancient Greek sculpture that was created during the Hellenistic period, between around 150 and 125 BC. It is thought to depict the goddess of love- Aphrodite (roman name Venus). It is sometimes referred to as the Aphrodite de Milos, due to the discrepancy in naming a Greek sculpture after a Roman goddess. The sculpture stands at an amazing 6ft 8in, and is made of Parian marble. Parian marble is a fine grain of pure white marble that was quarried (mined) during the classical era around the Aegean Sea. It was highly prized by Ancient Greek sculptors and is the main composition for many classical masterpieces, including the Winged Victory of Samothrace. Some scholars take issue with it being described as a depiction of Aphrodite and claim that it was actually Amphitrite (goddess of the sea and wife of Poseidon), as she was venerated on the island on which the statue was found. Also, guys really cool side note, the sculpture adheres perfectly to the golden ratio which is so cool.

The Venus de Milo was discovered in 1820 by a Greek farmer buried in a niche within the ruins of the ancient city of Milos. Upon its discovery in 1820 the sculpture was considered to be a significant artistic finding, but it wasn’t truly appreciated until much much later. Based on earlier drawings of the statue, before it arrived in France, it was revealed that there had been a plinth attached to the statue with the dates of its creation- dating back to the Hellenistic period, on a technicality this is after the classical period (as Ancient Greece is divided into three eras, Archaic, Classical, and Hellenistic). In the 19th century, the most desirable period for ancient art was ‘Classical’ and so the French actually hid the plinth that showed its true Hellenistic origins.

The Venus de Milo held a prime spot in the Louvre and became iconic, largely due to the clever french propaganda surrounding it and a need to reclaim an image of national identity and pride (this was because of a whole thing to do with Napoleon, just trust me it’s a lot). The fame surrounding de Milo in the 19th century owed much to the major propaganda, as in 1815 France had had to return the Venus de Medici to the Italians. The Medici had been regarded as one of the finest classical sculptures in existence and so its loss was monumental for the French art world. This is most likely the reason they promoted the de Milo so much, in an attempt to compensate for the loss of the Medici.

The statue has been praised relentless by artists and critics alike. Apart from this one dude who said it was “as beautiful as a gendarmerie”. Which honestly, I am choosing to ignore for no reason other than he’s wrong.

Anyways! I hope you all enjoyed reading about the Venus de Milo. I will link a 3D render here and the Louvre website has some really cool things about it too! Hope you all enjoy the rest of your weekend.

~Z

[cursedcomics]

Dream Job Writing the Legion of Super Heroes pt 8

A lot of comic writers don’t seem to appreciate that 1000 years is a long, long, long, long time.

If we had a time machine today, almost none of us would consider traveling back to the 11th century to be a smart idea.  What exactly seems fun about the 11th century?  Who would you want to meet from back then?  I think likewise travelling from the 31st century to the 21st would be an equally unappealing thought in the future.

(So why do the founders recruit Superboy?  Buy the book and find out... :) ).

To my view, there should be rules to including 21st century elements.

Any connections to the 21th century in the Legion should be traceable directly to Superboy, Supergirl, or Mon-El.

DC has kind of bought in to the idea that earth will fall into ruin several times before the LOSH takes over.   I am going to run with that and use that to pull random elements of the DCU into the future, but I think usage of specific 21st century characters in the actual Legion title should be very, very limited. 

The Legion brand is diluted if they have too much of any prior super hero team elements. Kal El and Kara Zor-El is enough.

There should not be a Lantern of any sort in the Legion.  I think Levitz’ original thought that the Guardians and the Green Lantern Corps are all long dead was smart in that it made the Legion both the JLA and the GLC in the 31st century.

There should not be a connection between the Ranzzes and Black Lightning.

Batman should never be a member. He is a dude who throws boomerangs.

Information about earth prior to maybe 2700 should be very, very sketchy for sensible reasons.  Things that we have “evolved” to consider distasteful today might be considered weirdly culturally taboo in an inexplicit way in the future.

Archeology may be considered a much more extreme version of graverobbing in the 31st century.  And society may have been steered there for a reason.

I didn’t like Abnett and Lanning digging up Ra’s Al Ghul as a Legion villain mostly because I don’t love the character, but whatever, he is an immortal playing the long game. 

Any immortal villain has won the long game several times over by time the Legion shows. They have let time defang their enemies and reduce them to dust.

I think a guy like that is fair game for the Legion.

It makes sense that someone like him or maybe Vandal Savage --- an immortal who has lived to learn the lesson of media manipulation we are seeing today --- might want to take advantage of society ending events specifically to wipe out all records of human history so no one else will retain the knowledge of how to stra manipulate society via media.

Or use old weapon technology. 

To that end, I might just make Vandal Savage a highly respected member of the Earthgov senate, just casually hanging out manipulating other senators and events and never getting caught... 

Doesn’t sound like Vandal Savage?  Well... A 1000 years is a long time and DC’s millennium sounds extremely rough.

“Well, he’s been the same guy for well over 1000 years!”...Yes, but he hadn’t lived through a nuclear war and the years afterwards.  I would argue that’s probably a personality changing experience. 

What about after that?  Being in a world with Ape Men, Tiger Men, & Lion Men, Vandal’s overwhelming strength would not be as overwhelming.  Maybe that would be exciting for a while, but animal men are probably a lot more savage than humans.  There were probably moments where Vandal had traumatic near death experiences.  

Vandal is not like Ra’s Al Ghul.  Vandal would be inclined to try to conquer the animal men. Ra’s would work the shadows.

The Animal men would come after Vandal where they wouldn’t come after Ra’s.

There were probably moments where the animal men wiped out all of Vandal’s help in an effort to starve him out. Vandal is not a farmer.  If you kill every animal within 100 miles, you might be able to starve out Vandal.  Animals might actually break him where humans might not try the same things.  And who might save him, but Ra’s?

What would Vandal finally learn from that.  Patience.

I think Vandal could be entirely different in the 31st century.

“MightyGodKing”  mentioned a couple of elements about which we are on the same page --- if society has burned to the ground several times over 1) there would be caches of buried weapons made with long forgotten technology and 2) that the DCU has Gorilla city --- where are the Gorillas in the future?

I think both are exceptional points that fit in this discussion. We’ll discuss DC’s lost weapons caches here and the Gorillas in the next section.

If you were Vandal Savage and Ra’s Al Ghul, you alone would know the locations of those secret caches and you would steer society in a direction not to look for those caches.

It’s a very interesting perspective to take on the 31st century.  

How much of Earthgov’s hard line stance against the Tornado Twins and super powered vigilantism originates at the office desk of Senator Savage? 

How much of Earth Government’s positions --- which irk the liberal minded R.J. Brande to no end --- come from immortals subtly steering the government?  

Why is the Earthgov’s controversial excavation permit on a site near the ancient ruins of Gotham City destined to cause a mess for the Legion?

[night-vale-s-new-neighbour]

Year 1 - Episode 2 : Glow Cloud

Notes in messy order:

Warning ! long post !

Scientists ? like carlos ? There is snow, ya not for long #climate-change

Ok the posters seem normal

Glowing cloud, fuuuuck the angels ? or the things on the highway ? ok weird, but not weirdest thing. Fuck never mind it killed someone HOW IS HE SO CHILL ABOUT IT ???? "it's probably nothing" -every government ever Dude the government really said 'hey man, how about you wave around and dance infront of the cloud that killed someone ?'

YOOOOOO I WAS RIGHT APACH GUY oh post office ? what happened. oh ya oh that s not good. OH THAT S WORSE. EVEN WORSE !!!!! lmao 'guysss can you believe what this guy just said ? indian magic ? how disrespectful. Anyways…' LIKE THAT S NOT THE POINT "what an asshole" - cecil

bro what the fuuuuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. What s up with the cattttttt hovering prisonn ToT noooooooooo no pet is perfect (litterally has a hovering cat) <o/// amen cecil amen

yo this commercial is like…… kinda creepy ? COCA COLA ?????? HAHAHAHHAHAAH DUDE I LITTERALLY LAUGHED OUT LOUD

"strange sighs that definitly NO ONE SAW" this town is so sus what the helllll "because all of us are normal :)" this shit is the fakest sentence i ever heard you say ??????? BRO ??????? drink to forget ?

what is up with the fucking scoutssssss, blood pact scout

I feel like that is actually very important cecil. Oh the animals are dead, great. this is litterally 'cloud that rains dead animals ? you mean a normal wednesday ?' yo, i really appreciate you trying to make this situation posive, but this aint it (about teaching kids colors with the cloud)

Oh god ? Daniel Oh my fucking god, of course DANIEL NOT SPEEDING !!!!!!!! NOT IDENTITY THEIFT !!!!!!! stop sign immunity letsgoooo B)))))

oh ok, great. Why ? Library is under renovation :zany-face: Ok louis looks cool. Oh my fucking god, why do i keep thinkig this can be nice

Blood space war, what hte fuck is going onnnnnnnnnn i dont need an entire universe of nightvale

"Wednesday was been cancel" bestie i wish i could cancel wednesday too ToT what good is government if it can't do the bare minimum

Free concert ? oh this isnt going to end in bloodshed…

Ok the farmer ? let's go ? hope he's not dead ? thats not good ? more corpses ? not good ? NOT THE ICE CREAM SHOOOOP ToT sounds like a very american technic bro, what the fuck is it ??? like i'm at my limit what the fuck is up with that cloud, why are we starting to worship it ? why is this kinda making me have an existantial crisis ????

heck ya the weather ((┌|o^▽^o|┘))♪ the music is actually good ? nice song

my dumb ass thought that this cloud would be there for multiple episode :skull: :skull: :skull: Insert vanilla extract joke here Wow… this was surprisingly nuanced and philosophical. I really liked that

ok list of things yo can we go back to when the pets where found ? yo this is kinda creepy yo can we like stop ?

?????????? CECIL ???????? WHAT THE HELL ???????? CECIL GET BACK HERE ??????? sigh goodnight Cecil :(

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

so i am back on the grima train and i was reading through your posts (absolutely quality, for which i can only thank you !! 💓) and you mentioned in one about his use of magic that you have a Lot of Feelings about grima in relation to gender and plz i need to hear them!! (if you want to share? 👀)

LOTR: Grima & Gender 

Oh man, so Grima and gender. My favourite topic. Other than Grima and magic - but they’re linked! So, that’s a bonus for us.

I want to thank you so much for asking this question. I have wanted to rant about this for Forever.

This became incredibly long, but the long and short of it is that Grima undermines social expectations of masculinity in Rohan through his disdain for martial achievements, his occupying a more private/passive role within the king’s household rather than the expected “masculine” public/active, his use of spells and potions being an “unmanly” and “cowardly” approach to problem solving, and his reliance on language and soft-power approaches to politics.

All of this works to position Grima within a more feminine role and character - at least within the context of Rohan’s hypermasculine performativity of manliness.

[It does allow us to read Grima as trans with greater ease in terms of fitting into the canon than the usual favourites, other than Eowyn. So, you know, do with that what you will. Eowyn and Grima both want to be queen. Let them be in charge! I’m going to get my ass bit for this.]

-

Grima’s gender performance needs to be quickly situated within the broader context of masculinity in Middle-Earth. Gondor’s ideal of masculinity is the gentler masculinity that everyone focuses on when they talk about men in middle earth being good models of what masculinity can look like. It’s a nurturing masculinity, it’s gentle, it’s healing-focused. Aragorn and others try and take the first off-ramp from violence or conflict whenever they can. There is no enjoyment in warfare or soldiering. It’s done because it’s necessary. Dick-swinging is limited to non-existent etc.

Rohan is different.

Faramir touches on this when he speaks to Frodo of how Boromir was more like the men of Rohan and how he thought that wasn’t a good thing as it meant he was seeking glory for glory’s sake, relishing war and soldiering as an occupation rather than an unfortunate necessity.

Of course, Faramir was also making (some very dubious) racial commentary, but race and gender are often bound up together (e.g. hyper-masculinization of black men and the feminization of East Asian men in the North America).

As R.W. Connell says, “masculinities are congurations of practice that are constructed, unfold, and change through time” — and, additionally, masculinity must be defined in opposition to femininity but, also, other masculinities.

For Rohan, there is a strong, militarized hyper-masculinity that threads through their culture. One of the reasons Theoden was seen as a failing king was his physical decline and inability to continue being a physically strong king. His aging emasculated him, more so when compared to Theodred and Eomer. (Something Theoden believed of himself and Grima capitalized on.)

For this, I’m going to speak of masculinity of the upper classes, since that’s what we see for Rohan. Masculinity, and how it’s to be performed, is contingent on social variables such as, but not limited to: age, appearance and size, bodily facility, care, economic class, ethnicity, fatherhood, relations to biological reproduction, leisure, martial and kinship status, occupation, sexuality etc. and as we never see lower class Rohirrim men it’s impossible to say what the “acceptable” and “expected” forms for a farmer or cooper would be.

Upper class men of Rohan are expected to be militarily capable - ready to ride and fight when called by their king or marshal. They are to be men of action over word, and when language is in play, it’s to be forthright and plain. No riddling. Marriage/Husband-ing is an expected part of manhood. Being strong minded, and capable of taking charge and making decisions is important. Fatherhood is also clearly prized, especially fatherhood that results in son(s).

(Theoden only having one child could be read as another “failure” in living up to Rohirrim ideals when compared to the older kings of his family who were far more prolific.)

The appearance of an “ideal” man is tall, fair, and handsome. Physically strong and capable in all ways (martially, sexually, fertile etc.).

Men should be able to demonstrate that they are capable of being in charge, taking control, defending and protecting families and homes. This slots in with more generalized expectations around bravery, honour and glory.

[Eomer: And that, in summation, is how you are to Be A Man.

Grima: Well that sounds utterly exhausting.]

-

So, with all of that in mind, let’s talk Grima.

First, let’s address the name and character construction as this is the least bound up in how he acts and its tension with Rohirrim ideals of Being a Man. It’s also interesting in that it can give a glimpse into Tolkien and the possible thoughts he had when constructing Grima.

Grima’s Name & Beowulf Stuff

Grima’s name is from old Icelandic Grimr, which is a name Odin takes during the Grimnismal saga.

Here are some lines from Odin in the saga:

I have called myself Grim,

I have called myself Wanderer,

Warrior and Helmet-Wearer,

[...]

Evildoer, Spellcaster,

Masked and Shadowed-Face,

Fool and Wise Man,

[...]

Rope-Rider and Hanged-God.

I have never been known

by just one name

since I first walked among men.

Not only is Grima’s name from Odin, more importantly, it’s the feminine version of that name. No man in the eddas or sagas goes by Grima. Only women. And most often they were seidr-workers or healers/magic practitioners of some kind.

"Other healers include Gríma from Fóstbræðra saga and Laxdæla saga and Heiðr from Biarmiland in Harald’s saga Hárfagra." 

- “Hostile Magic in the Icelandic Sagas,” Hilda Ellis-Davidson

And

"There was a man called Kotkel, who had only recently arrived in Iceland. His wife was called Grima. Their sons were Hallbjorn Sleekstone-Eye and Stigandi. These people had come from the Hebrides. They were all extremely skilled in witchcraft and were great sorcerers." 

- Laxdæla saga

This is most likely something Tolkien was aware of — I would be flabbergasted if he wasn’t. However, did he fully appreciate the implications in terms of gender and subversion of masculinity? Impossible to say, of course, but he certainly knew he was giving his male character a name that has only been used by women in historical texts.

It would be akin to naming your male character Henrietta instead of Henry. It’s a deliberate, explicit decision. And while I don’t think Tolkien expected most readers to track down the origin of Grima’s name, the --a ending, to most anglophone readers, signifies a feminine name, more often than not. At least, it rarely, if ever, signifies masculine.

So the name alone brings in, at a subconscious level to readers, feminine qualities.

Alongside this, Grima is loosely based on Unferth from Beowulf. The entrance of Gandalf et al into Meduseld directly mirrors Beowulf’s into Hrothgar’s hall (complete with Grima lounging at Theoden’s feet the same as Unferth at Hrothgar’s). Indeed, it was clearly Tolkien’s intention to make a call back to Beowulf with that scene. (He was being all “look how clever I am. Also these are Anglo-Saxons on horses. As a general fyi”).

Unferth is a fascinating character in his own right ,and there is much scholarly debate around his role within Hrothgar’s hall, as well as the text more broadly. While there isn’t enough time/space to get into Unferth, I will quickly note that he is another character who subverts his society’s ideas of manhood and masculinity — particularly with regards to expectations of heroism and bravery. Yet, at the same time, Unferth is noted for being very intelligent, cunning, good at riddling, and overall quick witted (also, a kin-slayer. Dude murdered his brothers for Reasons).

Unferth’s contrary behaviour that flies in the face of Anglo-Saxon norms and ideals of masculine bravery is clearly reflected in Grima. Particularly in Grima’s fear of battle and lack of interest in taking up his sword when called by his king.

This leaves us with a character who was given a woman’s name and who is loosely based on another character who is known for his inability to follow through on his society’s expectations for masculine behaviour. 

Grima, from the first moment we meet him, clearly reads more feminine than masculine - this is amplified when he’s contrasted with the likes of Theoden and Eomer. And, not only is his aligned with traditional femininity more than other male characters, he is specifically aligned with the more negative tropes of femininity (i.e. lack of bravery, unreliable, dubious morals etc.).

-

That is a brief overview of the bones of Grima’s construction: name and inspiration. Now for actions and characterization within the text. This will be subdivided into comments on his use of magic and how that interfaces with Rohirrim masculinity then we’ll get into power and language.

Grima’s key point of power is his ability to weave words in so powerful a way he could convince Theoden of his own infirmity and weakness thereby securing control over the king. Alongside this, we know that he was using certain “potions and poison” to further weaken Theoden. Most likely to amp up the king’s physical weakness so it coincided with Grima’s mental magic games.

Magic for Anglo-Saxon and early medieval Scandinavians was heavily rooted in the power of the spoken word. Runes were probably used but the historical support of this is vague. Which is to say, we know they were used, we’re just not certain how and to what extent.

We do know that rune staves were a thing. They were most often used to send your landwights after opponents or wreck havoc on enemies from afar. To make one, a magic-worker would carve the prescribed runes onto a large stave and position it in the ground facing the direction of their enemy. On top of the stave was added the head of a horse. (Lots of horse sacrifice happened for early medieval Scandinavians, alongside some human sacrifice.)

But, the brunt of magic for Anglo-Saxons and early medieval Scandinavians was spoken word. Which makes sense as their society was, like Rohan’s, predominantly illiterate or, at least, para-literate (though, there has been some recent archeological evidence that is starting to call that into question, for what that’s worth).

In particular, Grima’s spellwork aligns most closely with seidr, a fact I’ve gone about ad nausea. And, again, something we can assume Tolkien was aware of, which means he was also aware of the gendered implications of a man practicing the craft.

The mainstay of seidrcraft is, but not limited to, the following:

making illusions,

causing madness and/or forgetfulness,

brewing of potions and poisons,

prophesying,

channeling the dead,

channeling gods,

removal of elf-shot, and

recovering lost portions of someone’s soul.

The first three bullets are things Grima does to Theoden. That kind of magic — the kind that fucks with your mind and your sense of self, the kind that is subtle and quiet and lurks beneath the surface so you don’t know it’s happening, that’s cunning — that kind of magic is what women do.

It was considered unmanly/effeminate for a man to partake in it as it undermined the hypermasculine militarized culture of the time. Winning a battle or a fight through spells and poison was cowardly.

Therefore, in Rohan where we have this hypermasculine culture that so prizes military glory and grandeur and martial might, Grima pursuing his goals through spellcraft and potions/poisons is Grima pursuing distinctly unmasculine, effeminate modes of action.

Indeed, within Rohan it could call into question the entirety of his masculinity. It would make him ragr (adj. unmanly) because his actions are the epitome of ergi (noun. unmanliness).

"In the Viking Age, homosexual men were treated with extreme disdain and a complex kind of moral horror, especially those who allowed themselves to be penetrated. Such a man was ragr, not only homosexual by inclination and action, but also inhabiting a state of being that extended to ethical and social qualities. This complex of concepts has been extensively studied, and in the words of its leading scholar, "the unmanly man is everything that a man should not be with regard to morals and character. He is effeminate and he is a coward, and consequently devoid of honour". [...] What we would call sexual orientation was, in the viking age, completely bound up with much wider and deeper codes of behaviour and dignity, extending way beyond physical and emotional preference." -Neil Price, Children of Ash and Elm: A History of the Vikings

Though Price references specifically homosexuality in this passage, a man could be considered ragr for more than just that — and one of the other ways was through practicing seidr.

We see this with Odin, who learns how to do seidrcraft from Freyja, and is then mocked by Loki for how emasculating the practice is for Odin to undertake (as if Loki has any room to talk). Odin’s made himself effeminate, he’s made himself unmanly, he’s allowed himself to learn spells that could enable him to take a cowards way out of a situation, to be dishonourable etc.

Which is a neat tie-back to Grima’s name being one of Odin’s names, particularly when he is in disguise and using seidrcraft and wily ways to escape various unfortunate situations that he ends up in during the Grimnismal saga.

(As Odin says: I have been called Evildoer, Spellcaster, Masked and Shadowed-Face, Fool and Wise Man.)

It also mirrors him to Gandalf - another character who bears an Odinnic name. Gandalf very much represents the masculine, “acceptable” aspects of Odin. Grima embodies the darker, more dubious, and more effeminate, aspects of the god. As I’ve said in other posts, they are two sides of the Odin coin.

Though both are temperamental as fuck.

-

Alongside the spellcraft and potions, Grima’s performance of power does not align with Rohirrim traditions and ideals. He relies on his wits and his skill with language to navigate the world. Succinctly captured in the epithet bestowed upon him: Wormtongue. This is the modernization of Wyrmtunga, or, Dragon’s Tongue.

Wyrm can translate to worm, sure, and we see Saruman doing this on purpose when he refers to Grima as a worm, a creature that crawls in the dirt. But Wyrm, of course, is actually a form of dragon. And in Middle Earth, wyrm is used interchangeably with dragon (Smaug is called both wyrm and dragon), rather than denoting a specific species/categorization of dragon as it does in our world.

Grima’s approach to power is that of a gentle touch. He speaks softly, but doesn’t carry a large stick. He’s not Eomer or Theodred, who are much more traditionally martial, aggressive and forthright in their responses to a situation. Grima is clearly all about influencing those around him either through persuasion/use of words, or through spellcraft. He manipulates, he uses linguistic trickery.

-

Additionally, how he undertakes his role as advisor to the king places him more within the private world of Meduseld and the king’s household than the active, public world of marshals and thanes. And, of course, the private world of households was traditionally considered the woman’s domain while men were expected to occupy the public spaces of the world.

Of course, being involved in court politics is a public role as opposed to existing within a wholly private space (such as Eowyn. Who, in the books, takes a mostly private role until she is required to rule in her uncle’s stead while he and Eomer are off at war, and even then it is clearly considered a temporary situation and part of her duty as a woman). But the manner in which Grima occupies that public position is a more “feminine” one.

We can assume that if Eomer or Erkenbrand or Elfhelm occupied the role as advisor to Theoden, they would have a very different approach to the position. A much more aggressive, active and probably military-focused approach. Less carrot, more stick.

A quick note on his appearance in the film, aside from being entirely in black with black hair in a land full of blonds because he needed to be visually distinct as the Bad Guy. He is dressed in longer tunics and robes compared to Eomer and other Rohirrim men (aside from Theoden, but as soon as he is “healed” of his possession(?) he returns to the Proper Masculine shorter tunics than the Weak and Effeminate longer robes and tunics of before). Grima’s hair is longer than Eomer’s and Theoden’s, he wears only a dagger and not a sword, the furs and quilting of his clothes indicate wealth and status, of course, but also decadence and effeminacy.

-

All in all, Grima’s performance and actions undermine and subvert Rohirrim expectations of masculinity. If not outright transgressing gender norms. He uses spellcraft to achieve his ends which is cowardly and effeminate. When it’s not that, he relies on language and manipulation to ensure his position and rarely, if ever, willingly takes on an active, martial role that would be expected of a man who is in the king’s household and serves as an advisor and a quasi-second-in-command.

Here is a man, occupying a man’s role, but doing it like a woman. Subversive! Scandalous! Underappreciated by fandom!

Grima lives in a liminal, marginalized space that is at once gendered and ungendered but is absolutely Othered.

-

As for my note on Grima and being trans - absolutely a trans woman. Grima suffers from that thing of “I want to be you and sleep with you” re: Eowyn. That’s my hot take. (Similar to me and Alan Grant from Jurassic Park - I want to be him and sleep with him.)

But no, in all seriousness, a strong argument can absolutely be made for Grima being not-cis, however that might look for Grima. Grima and Eowyn are the two, within the trilogies, that have the strongest arguments to be made for not being cis.

(Grima is a bit of a foil for Eowyn, I think, while also being a foil for Gandalf.)

[blueboyluca]

Muster Dogs episode 2 thoughts:

Both this episode and the first one use the word ‘bloodline’ constantly. I’m not sure how to feel about this. To me, it’s basically analogous to ‘purity’ so I find it really curious that they’re pushing it so much. I would have thought working dogs would not have fallen so strongly on the side of pedigree as the conformation world. This could just be for the show, though.

The whole ‘bond’ thing is really not for me. What they mean is ‘relationship’ but they exclusively use the word ‘bond’ and to me that just says they’re relying on the outdated tropes around human–animal relationships. It’s rooted in archaic views around animals imo. While I do believe that human–animal relationships are really important and often really emotionally significant to individuals, this whole ‘bond’ idea is problematic as it generally puts the intangible, magical aspects of that relationship before the reality of the animal’s welfare. This is mostly semantics, but also not. (Also as an aside, what is up with the ‘Bluetooth connection’ thing?? Is this just for the layman audience?)

Again with the ‘alpha’ talk from Joni. And this time she specifically said her approach was just like “in the wild how the wolves and dingoes do it” which is just ugh.

Geography wise again, the Douglas Daly stuff is fascinating to me. The shots of the family by the Daly River and in the boat – that is prime crocodile country. None of those shots are crocodile safe! And not a single shot of a crocodile nor mention of it?? Wild. I have made documentaries about fishing in those areas and the crocs are everywhere. If they truly were on the banks of the river like that, that’s insane, even as locals.

Something interesting about reality television is characerisation. So, bad reality television just makes everything up. It’s not reality at all. Good reality television takes story elements that are already there and amps them up, which I would say is what is happening here. The characterisation of the Vic guy and Lucifer is probably an example of this. He is supposedly a newbie trainer and a newbie farmer and Lucifer is the ‘difficult’ puppy from this litter. Obviously a lot of this is highly exaggerated, i.e. the phone call was clearly 100% fake and also during the 4 month test Lucifer failed the bond section because he was distracted by an old shoe. Why was the old shoe there? Set up to fail for the drama. I don’t really care about this, but it’s something to be aware of with reality television.

Also the characterisation of the old fella from Qld is interesting. He seems like a soft sweetheart and they’re amping up the kids and grandkids angle. What I did like was how he talked about Helen McDonald and how amazing she is at training and how he aspired to be like her. I appreciated seeing an older dude say something like that about a woman. Noting also though that the one time we see collar popping is this guy and his puppy Annie.

The narrative choice to do the three bitch pups together in the test is interesting to me. I am cynical so I viewed this as a typical, if subtle, reliance on males in a narrative. I know they are dogs, but why did only the two male dogs get their test segments to themselves? Why did they group the three bitches together? Will be interesting to see if this becomes a pattern in the other episodes.

What I really liked was the emphasis on using working dogs for sustainability. Very cool to see this kind of discussion happening. Lots of talk about heavy machinery being bad for animal welfare and for the environment. Clearly this is being pushed because the show is about dogs, but also I believe them when they say it’s the trend that inspired the show at all.

And finally, I am enjoying watching this show and the main reason is the coverage. There is so much footage of dogs. So much to look at! Dogs in every shot! Dogs doing funny and cute and interesting things in every shot! An incredibly enjoyable viewing experience. I would just love to see this type of format applied to other things like dog sports. Following the training of agility dogs? Scent dogs? Cute and realistic challenges? Adorable. Sign me up. Will watch them all.

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Eyy so it feels like we haven't had some of your quality Mipha/Kohga content in a while! If you're in the mood for another double date fic, I'd be SO happy to read that! <3

Course you can! Lets get it!

“It was SO sweet of him to let us go fruit picking, wasn’t it?”

Link nodded. They had planned with a local farmer to go apple picking from his orchid, and Mipha offered to have Sooga and Kohga join them. Kohga shrugged, handing his empty basket to Sooga, who really didn’t mind carrying both baskets on his shoulders.

“Free fruit is free fruit. Sure the he, shes, and theys back at the clan would appreciate some more fruit. Thinking about making pies.”

“I love your apple pies.”

“I know you do, which is why you better FUCKING eat it once we get home.”

Sooga nodded. Kohga made the best apple pie he’s ever tasted, it was so full of love and care. The same amount of love that Sooga had Kohga (which was just a BIT more than Link’s love for Mipha). They all stood in front of the orchid, and Link’s whistle was more than enough to convey the magnitude of the orchid. The farmer was old, so picking apples was such a strain on him. Mipha was glad that she accepted his offer; to pick all the apples, in exchange for each one of them going home with a basket full.

“Well, we might as well get started. Link, set up the ladders here and over there, will you?”

Link nodded, and did as he was told. Kohga and Sooga didn’t need them, but Kohga just liked watching Link carry stuff (especially in his climbing shirt, show off those arms of his). Mipha got up onto the ladder, starting to pluck the fruits, while throwing them down to Link’s ever filling basket. Kohga up on the tree, sitting on the branch and looking down at Sooga.

“Don’t miss any, dumbshit.”

“I will not, Master Kohga.”

Kohga started to pluck them from the branches, throwing them down below. It was comforting to Sooga, getting to see his Master pick fruits and toss them below, like a god blessing the world with holy fruit. 

“You know apples pies aren't very common in the domain. You have a good recipe, I take it?"

"Yeah, got it from my mom. She loved it, and so did my dad-Sooga stop looking at my ass and focus on the apples."

"Apologies."

Mipha chuckled. He thought they were just so sweet together, as odd as they were. Mipha looked down at Link, reaching with her foot to push Link on the forehead.

"Darling, stop eating the apples, you'll have plenty when we get home.”

“Where does all that food even GO?”

Kohga asked. Link could eat enough for a village, and STILL not put on any weight, and Kohga just couldn’t understand it. Link grinned as he bent over a bit, sticking his ass out. Mipha covered her face in embarrassment, and Kohga lost his shit in laughter.

“Holy SHIT-Mipha, your boy’s getting a sense of humor! And don’t act like you didn’t look, Sooga!”

Sooga turned away, not ready to admit Kohga was right. He just focused on the apples, and trying to ignore his Master’s laughter. Once Kohga calmed down, he wiped the tears from his face, shaking his head.

“Oh my god, Mipha, what the hell, I’d love to have a dude THIS funny.”

“....I can be funny.”

All eyes went to Sooga, and somehow Sooga felt a little out of place. Kohga opened his mouth to say something, when Mipha interrupted him, wanting to let him down gently.

“You’re kind, Sooga. But humor isn’t exactly a big talent of yours. Not that the gesture isn’t sweet.”

Kohga hung upside down from the tree, looking down at a pouting Sooga.

“You’re cute, Soogy, really you are. But funny? That’s not you.”

“I can make you laugh! I can be just as funny as he is!”

Kohga folded his arms across his chest, clearly not convinced.

“Uh huh. Okay, make us laugh, Mr.Chuckles. Love for you to beat his funny lookin’ face.”

All eyes were on Sooga, clearly waiting for something. Link held up an apple, gesturing towards it in some kind of way to help. Then Sooga looked at Kohga, and spoke.

“You just like him because he’s fucking fruity.”

That did it. Kohga suddenly roared in laughter. So much so he lost his grip on the tree, not acknowledging that Sooga dropped the basket of apples in order to catch him. 

“Oh my GOD you called him a fucking FRUIT-”

Mipha looked down from her spot on the treat, shrugging.

“You...could take that as you being sweet?”

“IT MEANS HES FUCKING G A Y!”

Sooga chuckled to himself. It was a stupid little joke, and he loved Kohga. Loved him here, amongst the apples and the falling sun.

He really was the apple of his eye.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

💌 Love Letter to Floyd Leech~ 💌

Dear Floyd,

Happy birthday to my favorite Leech twin! uwu

… Eh? No, I’m definitely not lying. Floyd is… the cutest! The smartest! The strongest! The most talented! The absolute best!

… In all seriousness, I really do appreciate you. You’re like a breath of fresh air (both figuratively and literally, since you probably knock the wind right out of the lungs of the people you wail on). It’s nice~

When I first saw your name, I thought you were an old man. I don’t think I know anyone in the modern era with the first name Floyd, so my brain just defaulted to those old timey American novels where the main character is an old farmer dude trying to make an honest living off the land. There were a lot of jokes floating around at the time of your profile’s release about you always looking “stoned out of your mind”. On top of that, your voice was super raspy and unlike anything I’d ever heard before.

You were an odd one.

But that’s alright--because being different is not bad, and oddity keeps things interesting.

I went into Twisted Wonderland not quite knowing what to expect from you. Part of me thought you’d play the role of a childish character, always carefree and marching to the beat of your own drum. The other part of me thought you would be the bodyguard type, to match your twin’s butler aesthetic and Azul’s… mob boss vibes.

To some extent, you really were like a kid. Just doing what you like, when you like… and just moody all around. In other ways, you were like a bodyguard, too. A really scary one. You could be laughing one minute while making takoyaki with strange fillings and tearing the hinges off a door the next to hunt down some misbehaving guppies.

But!! You can be charming at times, too. Your shirt may not be fully buttoned, but you really care about your shoes appearance despite that. It’s also adorable how you give everyone nicknames! And though you create chaos and squeeze victims wherever you go… that’s just your way of expressing yourself and having fun.

I was scared of your giggle at first, but it has two sides to it. It can be frightening, and it can be cute, because you have that gap moe charm about you. You never know when it comes to you, and that’s part of the excitement. Nowadays, your goofy grin brings me more joy than fear. I think I agree with Jade when I say that I want to see you always happy and smiling.

You’re a genius, but you don’t flaunt it like typical genius-type characters do. You live freely, regardless of what others say, and that’s something to be admired. Life’s more fun without restraints and rules, isn’t it? You keep on being you, Floyd.

… You’re pretty popular, you know that? Probably the most popular boy--and for good reason. That meme… “Well, mark me down as both scared and horny” pretty much summarizes the fandom’s feelings toward you. I’ve literally watched several of my friends break down in hysterics when it was Jade that got the limited Halloween SSR card and not you. The whole fandom has been waiting months and months for you to finally take center stage in an event. I hope that you’re able to shine sometime soon…!!

Again, happy birthday.

I look forward to seeing all the havoc and chaos you’ll bring to us in the years to come.

Best regards,

The Writing Raven