#DISORDER

[newmusick]

that's crazy Tina .. you will have to convince me ..it was the #crazysodomite

logan's act violations are occurring now ... obedience to the law must be kept ...

collecting posts of this type

[cosmonautroger]

Joy Division, Disorder

[toskabi]

i hate being so fucking needy.

i hate that i constantly want your attention,

i want you all by myself.

[disability-kitties]

Chronic Migraines Kitty mock up

Designer: @zthesheep

Flag Design: @themogaidragon

[helloeverything123]

Joy Division - Disorder

[philosophybits]

When the Way was lost, then there was virtue; when virtue was lost, then there was benevolence; when benevolence was lost, then there was righteousness; when righteousness was lost, then there were rites. Rites are the frills of the Way and the forerunners of disorder. So it is said, He who practices the Way does less every day, does less and goes on doing less until he reaches the point where he does nothing; does nothing and yet there is nothing that is not done.

Zhuangzi, The Complete Works of Zhuangzi, Watson tr. (Ch 22)

[schizouse]

ೀㅤㅤ(Blind) Bat

A flag for those who are visually impaired in any way. Whether that be nearsighted, farsighted, colorblind, completely or almost blind, etc. Intended for those whose bad vision is more severe but anyone without perfect vision is free to use.

Name taken from the phase "blind as a bat".

ㅤི༏⠀ ͏ ͏ ͏DNI : Basic dni, non-traumagenic systems, anti-paraphilias, transIDs, radqueers, anti-good faith, narc abuse believers, anti-self diagnosis.

Alt text:

[PT: blind bat. a flag for those who are visually impaired in any way. whether that be nearsighted, farsighted, colorblind, completely or almost blind, etc. intended for those whose bad vision is more severe but anyone without perfect vision can use. /END PT]

[crownedhades]

im having a killer sans and my own personality disorder fixation so i might as well talk about them both. and also share how my symptoms and love for killer overlap.

ill also be talking about color and swap sans.

.°• ੈ♡₊˚•.

so for reference i have covert schizoid personality disorder. covert meaning that you would not initially expect me to be szpd upon first meeting me unless youre a psychologist that understands how my inner mind works.

anyway. szpd is also commonly compared to autism, depression, avoidant and anti-social personality disorders due to a variety of reasons and overlapping symptoms.

short comparison explanation to quickly dumb it down: autism? shared social ineptness. depression? chronic anhedonia. apd? we... avoid people. aspd? most schizoid's have limited or no empathy.

for a quick szpd description, read this brief mayo website. keep in mind, though, that while mayo clinic is mostly credible, they do reference the dsm-5. schizoid specialized psychologists are known for having beef with the dsm-5 and constantly shit on it in their introductions in schizoid related research papers.

as another thing, schizoid's have this thing called a "safety person." not all schizoid's have one, but its a clinical term used for when a schizoid trusts someone enough to rely on them for things. i guess. (similar to the term "favorite person" for bpd? but obviously not as extreme since we can easily cut our sp off if theyre deemed unsafe. we're not that attached.)

why am i explaining all of this? because i know damn well most people reading this have no idea what szpd is. from lengthy experience.

moving on!

what you have been all been waiting for... killer sans.

yeah, honestly, i love the dude. i kind of see him as a son more than anything, so outside of me projecting myself onto him, hes kind of like a son to me.

an adult son that i have not been able to kick out of the house for a millenia bc he spends all of his money on random shit that he collects and trophies in his room. type of vibe.

anyways, i know people usually headcanon killer as having aspd. and im not gonna take that away from anyone because honestly, i 45% agree with it. its not my cup of tea, but theres definitely some convincing signs.

but then do i headcanon him as having szpd, if not aspd? fuck to the fucking no. he is closer to aspd than szpd for sure, even if i dont fully support aspd killer.

but as someone with szpd, i do heavily relate to killer in quite a few things. such as the general emotional supression that comes with being a schizoid. the absolute indifference that embodies us. the lack of reaction. the lack of feeling. the lack of identity. having to mimic other people just to blend in and avoid confrontation because we dont want any kind of attention. good or bad attention.

sure, killer is much different than us when it comes to attention. honestly, from the looks of it, im pretty convinced he has periods of craving attention.

schizoids do not crave attention.

but on a lot of other things.... its easy to relate to him. its easy to see myself in him. its easy to pick apart his mind and psychoanalyze his character when you've already done half the work just by observing yourself.

a schizoids observation of the self can be described by this fellow tumblr user.

so its very easy to understand killer. stupidly easy. like a predictable animal under the influence of "classical conditioning."

classical conditioning... this does not help with my more cruel, angst-driven headcanons.

but anyway.

color sans in specific almost feels like a safety person to killer. because like... in order to be a safety person, you have to respect a schizoid's autonomy and independence. you cannot force us to rely on you. you cannot force us to open up to you.

so i make this comparison because i feel like thats exactly how it works between killer and color, too. they go at each others own pace. color only makes emotional demands when its important, but otherwise keeps a reasonable space as to not overwhelm or threaten killers autonomy. mutual respect and effort kind of thing.

i also make this comparison due to killer's absolute hatred for swap sans. how hes depicted to always be bullying or releasing his anger out on swap. and for what? because swap wants to help killer?

another trait that happens to relate to schizoid.

schizoids easily feel disgusted by reassurance and people going out of their way to "help them." mostly due to the schizoids innate superiority complex (but has a stable ego, uneffected by praise or criticism) and because schizoids "already know" what theyre being reassured on.

its like youre insulting our intelligence and logical reasoning, essentially, since we are not intune with our emotions enough to accept emotional reassurance.

which i think killer also feels when it comes to swap. swap's attitude feels more like an insult than anything, which is different from color's laid-back approach.

"how dare you tell me something i already know?" kind of thing.

.°• ੈ♡₊˚•.

this is all for tonight. i might make a part 2 post tomorrow. its time for bed for me.

again tho i do not think killer is szpd. this is just a comparison for funsies.

edit: heres part 2

[cosmonautroger]

Joy Division, Disorder, 1979

[lichtschimmer]

USA, California, Sequoia-Kings Canyon National Park, Mineral King - webcam 

[doodlebuglet3447]

Explaining diabetes to my boyfriend 😭

[leoquievreux]

Travail en cours

[q4u]

[chronicillnesshumor]