#Corvo has... complicated feelings

[geminison]

thinking about that one 1930s something no powers au fic where Daud is still a gang leader but he's cheeky, arrogant and (occasionally) charming aka killing the Empress didn't happen (but killing Corvo's lover still did) and plague isn't a thing

like ugh I'm so in love with that concept. Daud but the consequences of his actions didn't catch with him yet.

maybe it captivates me just bc we didn't get to see him like that in canon at all. Daud is tired confused and lowkey crushed by canon events by the time we get to see him close

[softlypaintedseafoam]

sparkler

synopsis. on the eve of ace’s 16th birthday, and your second to last new year in your hometown, you suggest trying your hand (or lips) at a staple new year’s tradition.

pairing. portgas d. ace x reader

word count. 3.2k | masterlist

content warning. f!reader in mind (but written gender neutral), pre-relationship, mutually unrealized feelings, first kiss (new year's kiss)

reblogs & interactions appreciated.

my actually planned ace wip still isn't done so you guys get a repost instead. it's a struggle rn because of the tonal shift post intro it might be split into two separate fics that can be read as standalones but are technically connected????? making shit complicated for myself 101. this was actually the first fic i wrote this year although it was posted originally on my older account!

“Well look at that,” you giggle, unsurprised, at how Luffy lays eagle spread on his back. His snores filling the air make up for the lack of crickets. “He’s knocked the hell out.” You poke his cheek, the 12 year old’s head turning with no resistance at the motion.

Ace snorts from his perch next to the window but the moonlight illuminates the softness of his expression. “Coming all the way out here was his idea too.”

“I can stay up all night!” The boy flailed when the idea of awaiting New Year’s Day in the old windmill was proposed. “I’m older now, so I won’t fall asleep!” He insisted the same way he did the previous year when he was 11. And the year before that. And the year before that.

With an amused sigh, you cover the boy with another blanket as Ace continues, “we’ll just have to wake him up. Again. He’ll pout if we don’t.” You make a noise of agreement as you make your way back to your place at the window.

Even this far from the Goa Kingdom’s most remote establishment, you can feel the buzzing excitement of the whole island. Something about the upcoming year does something to the atmosphere. You’re sure even the nobles in High Town are anxious with anticipation in their extravagant attire and even more extravagant parties. Somehow you know those celebrations have nothing on the ones you have with your boys.

Typically you’d be in the heart of Mt. Corvo, watching as the clan of bandits sang and drank. After a raucous chorus of cheers as the clock struck midnight and the distant fireworks roared, a boisterous birthday song ensued once Luffy was shaken away with the promise of food. Dadan would gripe but she’d still bring a cake out the kitchen, the only time she’d let the ‘gremlins living in her house’ eat sugar so late.

It’s a little different being in the old windmill.

The bandits are back home and Dadan said if they’d be out at the windmill all night, then they wouldn’t be getting cake until tomorrow. A worthy sacrifice for the cause. Luffy wanted to see the fireworks this time, so the fireworks you’d see.

You breathe in the crisp winter air, watching in amusement as your breath billows into smoky plume when you exhale.

One more year. Almost, you add after a second. Once it’s midnight, you officially have one more year before you and Ace leave this place. Resting your chin on your arms, you look at the dark-haired boy. Your fingers dig into your palms without your meaning to when you see his profile illuminated by the moon’s glow.

Pretty is the word that comes to mind.

Ace has always been cute. It’s been an objective fact since you were 10 and he was more sour than sweet. In this moment, however, 'pretty’ is the only word you can use to describe him.

Ace is very pretty.

Elbow propped and chin resting on his palm, Ace is truly something to behold. Maybe it’s in how you can barely see his freckles on his cheeks, or maybe it’s in how the quiet breeze caresses his hair.

For a reason you can’t fathom, the corner of your eyes prickle and they feel more sensitive to the cold.

I don’t know why I wanna cry when I look at you sometimes, as if to ground yourself, you breathe deeply and the feeling passes. It’s strange but it seldom happens. Maybe you’re just happy that you’re both still alive and the promise you made as little kids is going to come to fruition.

“I’ll join your crew,” you told him earnestly the winter after you turned 11. Dawn Island was covered in a blanket of snow and in an hour Luffy would stumble into your precious hideout and drop the bombshell of the century. Even then, it wouldn’t matter. Ace’s father could be the devil himself and he’d still be your friend, the captain of your crew. “Then you won’t be alone when the journey’s over because I’ll still be there.”

You’ll both turn 17 and then you’ll head off on a small boat to seas unknown. It’s finally so close to happening. Just one more (almost) year and you’ll leave late spring after Luffy’s birthday. One more birthday before you go.

You don’t realize you’re staring until you see dark brown eyes looking back at you, lips turned in a shy smile. “What is it?”

You blink, suddenly aware of your surroundings again. Your cheeks feel hot in the cool night. “Nothing,” you murmur. You hold each other’s gaze in spite of your words when in any other situation you’d have looked away by now, embarrassed. A wave of silence, save for Luffy’s snores, pass over you again. Like a babbling brook, you can’t help yourself, opening your mouth once more. “You’ve just… changed a lot, I guess.”

“They’re good changes, right?” Ace chuckles sheepishly.

It’s a contagious feeling, your lips curling upwards at the sound. The Ace you know now smiles more than he frowns and looks the most alive in the sun. It’s a stark contrast to the boy you first met. The one who frowned constantly and pushed away anyone who tried to get close, akin to a scared cat. “Yeah,” you nod into your arms, not minding how your cheek presses against your eye. “Definitely good.” So is the fuzzy feeling in your chest; the one always happy when Ace is around.

His smile is a little softer; at least that’s what it looks like. “Good.” Good. “It’s also pretty good I’m taller than you now, huh?”

“Oh shut up,” you shove the boy lightly. You may have been the tallest of your band when you were 10, but it came to a staggering halt after you reached 160 centimeters. You’d fought hard but Ace had eventually surpassed you when you were 12 and he hasn’t let you forget since. “I’m still older than you, you know,” you remind him petulantly.

“And you’ll still be short,” Ace replies all too pleased with himself.

You glare at Ace sourly before the two of you erupt in shared laughter. “Stop being an ass,” you say as your laughter subsides into light huffs. “Makino’ll cry if she knows you’re being mean to me.”

“There was nothing in her lessons against teasing,” Ace snorts and the laughter subsides.

Holding each other’s gazes does not.

Your shoulders feel tense even when there is no reason for them to be. It’s strange to be even a little nervous around someone you trust with your entire life. Ace doesn’t seem to have the same problem, though. At least, until you notice his hand flexing between an open and closed palm.

The two of you jolt at the sound of a particularly loud yelp, eyes whipping in the direction of the village.

It’s time?

A moment passes, however, and there are no fireworks.

Damn.

The two of you sigh in exasperated unison. “False alarm,” Ace grumbles.

“Looks like Luffy gets a few more Z’s, then,” you drape yourself over the window sill. Even the silhouettes of the windmills from which the village earned its name look like they’re growing antsy. “You’re lucky, your birthday always comes with a guaranteed light show.”

“It’s just an excuse for everyone to get wasted and call off work,” Ace waves a hand nonchalantly in dismissal. “Even at Dadan’s everyone ends up sleeping in until 3.”

“No,” you sit up properly once more. “The entire world is celebrating. That’s special.”

It’s brief but a humorless huff escapes Ace’s lips, “they’re not celebrating me.”

He doesn’t look at you when he says it, eyes firmly staring out the window. You’re sure he feels your eyes on him though. “They’re all celebrating your birthday because I said so,” you scoot a bit closer, nudging him with your elbow. “You get the biggest party, a guaranteed light show, all the works. You even get all the once-a-year traditions!”

At your clumsy insistence, he looks your way with the smallest hint of a smile for your efforts. “Getting drunk is an all the time thing at our place.”

Our place, he says it seamlessly. Like you’ve belonged at Dadan’s your whole life when you only started staying over more and more after your grandfather passed. “Hey don’t doubt me, I am the fun fact queen,” you puff our your chest, feeling light. “There’s this kingdom in the New World called Dressrosa; a book I read said they eat 12 grapes! And other islands close by to it party at cemeteries!”

“That one sounds like something you’d do,” Ace adds in his commentary.

You’re giddy at how he knows you so well, “and in some countries, they hang onions on their door.”

“Onions?”

“Onions,” you repeat yourself solemnly.

“It’s nice to know people are out there hanging up onions on my birthday,” Ace snickers. Another grin breaks out across your face at the sight. “What are people doing here on Dawn Island then?”

“Drinkin’.”

“I already know that one!” You don’t dodge how Ace pinches your cheek, giggling all the while.

You shake away his hand, not minding how the sensation of his touch lingers on your skin. “Okay, okay, I’ll be serious,” you sigh as if he is asking you to bring him all of your weight in gold. You think back to New Year’s Eves and midnight celebrations past. Demarius and the gang are probably down there right now, you realize.

If someone had told you when you were 10 you’d grow a moderate distance apart from your Windmill Village friends, you would call them crazy. A boring adult who liked spoiling the fun of children. Sure enough the non-existent prophecy came true.

It’s been 6 years since you were a child playing Marines only because it’s what Demarius and Stacey wanted to play. Your game of choice, Adventuring Sailor, was apparently too vague.

You seldom saw them unless you made the effort to trek down town. Visit your old home, dust off your old things. Visiting your grandfather’s grave. Then you’d swing by Pierre’s and suddenly you were all together again chatting like not much had changed between you.

Demarius and Stacey counted down the days until Garp would finally take them to a navy base like he promised. “We just have to be 16 and he’ll take us to enlist.” They’ll be leaving this year then.

Lisa Lisa being 13 still has a few years (soon to be a couple) to go.

Pierre is more than content to take over his family’s farm. Windmill Village is all he knows and all he is interested in knowing.

Then there’s you, the aspiring pirate. It didn’t have to be a pirate; you just wanted to be on the sea with no strict rules and regulations telling you where to go. Pirate just sort of became what you will end up doing. Your friends are kind enough not to comment on it. Much. Demarius still tries getting you to change your mind from time to time.

There’s a clear divide between you all now, minute it may be. They’re not your closest confidants anymore and you’re not theirs.

The New Year’s celebrations you had together in the past were still fun though.

Makino and the aunties made a huge spread, everyone sang and then there was the countdown to ring in the new year. You’d always been too concerned with the fireworks ー large, blooming flowers in the sky. You saw it sometimes, though, if you glanced around before your eyes looked up.

There’s always a handful of people who press their lips against one another when the clock strikes 12 and the fireworks are soaring.

“Uhh, people kiss.” Ace sputters at your words, coughing in surprise. “Yeah people kiss; no bullshit,” you confirm before he can ask you to repeat yourself.

“Why?!”

You shrug, ignoring how your own heart is beating less evenly, “Makino said it’s supposed to make your love life lucky in the new year. But I dunno,” when you visited a week prior, Stacey had been prime for his New Year’s kiss. Apparently he’s had a bunch; you wouldn’t know, you haven’t been in town for New Year’s Eve since Luffy, Ace and Sabo became part of your life. “Stacey’s apparently been macking it up since we were 14 and I’ve never seen the guy date anybody.”

Ace looks like he’s run a 5k after he collects himself. You hold back a chuckle knowing it’d embarrass him further. I kinda wish it was tomorrow already. It’s cute when Ace blushes, looking reminiscent of a strawberry. It’s a look you’re surprisingly fond of. “Have you?”

Ace looks at you with a raised eyebrow, “have I what?”

“Have you ever kissed anyone at midnight?”

“No,” Ace mutters, shoulders up to his ears as he avoids your gaze. “I was busy beating up thugs for pirate savings back then.” He certainly hadn’t kissed anyone at New Year’s in the time you’ve known him. The most affection he ever gets are clasps on the shoulder and proud hugs. “Besides who would I have even kissed? Dadan? Dogra?”

You snort, “you’re not their type.”

He rolls his eyes at your jibe, “yeah, yeah, neither are you.”

A breeze passes by and you blink, staring at Ace’s form, not a single thought passing through your mind. Truly, it’s word vomit at its finest. You aren’t sure what makes you say, “well what about kissing me?”

It’s when Ace looks at you, eyes wide, and face undoubtedly red even if its tinted blue in the moonlight, that you feel bashful. You can’t find it in you to retract your words, you grip your knees tightly. You wonder if you look more calm than you feel. “You know, for New Year’s. I haven’t either and,” you suddenly cough, unsure of who you’re trying to convince more. “Well, it isn’t like I’m trying to fall in love any time soon or anything but I’ve never kissed anyone. And if I’m gonna I don’t want it to be weird. Or with someone I don’t know. You’re my best friend so it won’t be weird. Not that we have to,” you add quickly.

The seconds, minutes or perhaps years it takes for Ace to answer feel like eons. Waking up Luffy in time for the fireworks seems like a less daunting task. Maybe you should, lest you die of embarrassment where you sit.

Thankfully ー thankfully ー Ace puts you out of your misery with a shy glance. “Alright,” his voice is barely a whisper. He nods, more to himself than you, in a bout of self-assurance. “Yeah, let’s do it.”

“Alright,” you agree dumbly.

As if they sense the agreement taking place, there is a distant chorus of excited squeals and laughs. You look out at the townscape, mind misty. When you strain your ears, you can vaguely hear the countdown beginning. 'Ten!’

Your heart clenches and Ace stutters at the same time, panicked, “Where- where do the noses go?”

Licking your lips, fidgeting, “I go one way, you go the other? That’s what everyone else does.”

'Eight!’

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah,” you suppress an anxious shudder, equal parts excited and terrified. It’s Ace, it’s fine. There’s nothing nerve wracking about it, you tell yourself. Imagine if this was a stranger. Or worse, someone else you know. But this is Ace. You’re safe with Ace, that thought makes you a fraction less nervous.

'Five!’

“What about Luffy?”

'Three!’

You spare a glance at the boy in question, still snoring away and unaware to your situation. “We’ll wake him up in time.”

'One!’

It’s you who leans first, a bottle of nervosity and too much energy. Crossing the very thin line into Ace’s space, hands resting upon the cool wooden floorboards, you press your lips against his. There’s a panicked noise he makes and you jolt away with your own, “sorry, I panicked!”

Fireworks scatter across the sky, setting the sky aglow but you barely even notice it. “It’s alright, I did too,” Ace murmurs, brushing his fingers across his lips. You aren’t sure what kind of expression he’s making. Wherever he is, he isn’t in the same room as you. He looks at you and you flinch, not sure if you’re fearful or still full of too much energy. “We, we can try again,” the sky turns red and paints Ace in a flush hue. “If you want.”

Slowly you nod, “I want to.”

Considerably calmer, you release a breath and this time Ace is doing the leaning. Your noise of surprise is soundless as his face slowly, carefully grows closer. In the light of the fireworks and the moon, you see him look at your lips and you swallow as your heart stutters. “It’s really okay?” Ace asks, voice small.

You nod, twice for good measure, foreheads tapping against each other lightly. “It’s okay.”

He moves a fraction of a centimeter, glancing from your lips to yours eyes again before finally closing the gap. Your eyes close, lips puckering instinctively at the feel another against your own.

His lips are slightly chapped, warm. Ace has always been warm; he’s like your own personal fireplace during the winter. It’s nice. He’s nice like this, lips snug against your own like you’re made of something precious even if you’re not. It’s a kiss that feels like it lasts forever yet not long enough when he pulls away and you trail after him for a half a second before stopping yourself.

The room is gold when you open your eyes and suddenly you can hear the fireworks again. When did you stop hearing them in the first place? Brown eyes stare into your own, noses not far apart.

It’s like you’re the only two people in the world like this; just you and Ace.

The corner of your eyes feel prickly again, your breath intertwining in the small space between you. It must be the fireworks making you feel a tad more sentimental and you’re not sure how to tether yourself to feeling normal again. Not when either of you are unsure how to break the silence, unable to look away from each other.

A shade of green erupts over the sky, a color not native to Ace at all that causes you to say something. “Happy birthday,” you breathe dreamily.

Ace’s lips twitch before breaking in a medium sized grin, “thanks.”

You come to your senses with a hiss, “fuck, we have to get Luffy up before the fireworks end.” Your knees ache as you rise onto your feet and your legs are a bit shaky as you step towards the boy. “Luffy! Get up, it’s Ace’s birthday! There’s a meat merchant passing by!”

Luffy is up faster than you can blink, “meat?!”

“No but it is Ace’s birthday,” you snort, shaking your head in amusement.

That brings a brighter grin on Luffy’s face, eyes shining. Luffy is as Luffy does, he wastes no time breaking into song. “Happy birthday to you,” he begins, off-key as always but you join in with his singing. Your chest burns something golden that doesn’t hurt and you suppress the urge to press your fingers against your lips.

[ajastu]

Ok here we go. On the topic of the overstated significance of the evil choices present in the DA games.

DISCLAIMER this is purely my personal opinion and isn't intended as a serious analysis or anything like that. just exploring my own thoughts on the topic👍

also another mini disclaimer. i will be honest my dai replay is at a standstill, and i dont want to go thru like 100 hours of gameplay just for a simple post. if anyone remembers dai better than i do feel free to contribute to the discussion etc etc

With that out of the way.

So here’s my hot take. I do not think that a DA game absolutely NEEDS to give you the option to do some atrocities. That is not what inherently makes them RPG games, or Dragon Age™ games.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I'm not arguing that these options shouldn't be in the games. My main point is that their absence is not as terrible as people like to say it is.

Of course, the more options there are, the more types of player character you can develop. And I’m an OC guy, i love that shit, i get it. But i also tend to make the same damn choices in each of my playthroughs, and that hasn’t stopped me from developing several very different protagonists for DAO alone. 

The power to make a compelling character does not lie solely in the options the game provides you. It also lies in this thing called ‘imagination’. But i digress.

Thing is, mostly the cruel options don't really contribute anything special to the narrative. There are no real consequences in the overall arc of the game. The Warden is still going to save Ferelden. Hawke is still going to be the Champion, and is still going to defeat Meredith. The Inquisitor is still going to seal the breach and kill Corypheus.

You have some consequences re: companions, but that's about it. You cannot FAIL because of the choices you make.

And, another hot take? I think that playing a cruel character in DA is actually less interesting/compelling than playing a kind one. 

It is easy to be cruel or indifferent in the shoes of the Warden/Hawke/the Inquisitor. It makes things more straightforward, less complicated. It is much harder to be kind, to be hurt each time you fail to save someone, and persevering anyway. 

I think what a lot of people who argue that ‘kindness doesn’t mean much if you don’t have a choice not to give it’ miss, is that kindness does not need to come in the same package every time. There are many ways to be kind, and for it to shape you. Kindness absolutely has value and complexity on it’s own.

BUT. That is me taking a detour. Let’s get back on point. 

And to do that, let’s talk about the first Dishonored game. There will be spoilers.

For those who don’t know, Dishonored has a chaos system that is affected by how many people the protagonist, Corvo, kills during the game. The more you kill, the higher the chaos rises. It starts affecting gameplay, too: more guards, more corpses in the street, more disease and more infected. The city reacts to your actions. Violence breeds more violence, and at the end it all but forces your hand to keep killing.

On the other hand, you have low chaos. It is possible to go through the game without killing a single person, even the main targets you need to eliminate to advance the plot. The less death there is, the less the city itself suffers.

On the surface, this is kind of very straightforward. Killing bad, the game says. 

But let’s look at one of the non-lethal options the game offers. 

First target. High Overseer Campbell, the head of the main religious organization of the Dh setting. Despite holding this position, the man is rotten to the core (or, perhaps, it is exactly why he holds this position). He blackmails, he kills, he conspires. Killing him is the right thing to do. And if you don’t care about all that moral stuff, killing him is going to be revenge. 

For the non-lethal elimination, however, you can brand him as a heretic. By quite literally burning the heretic brand onto his face. 

It leads to him becoming a total outcast, because even offering food to him is counted as a crime. You meet him later in the game as a weeper - someone so far in the plague stages, he is practically a zombie. 

But! That is not all. 

I once wanted to do a playthrough where i only kill the main targets. I killed Campbell, all was well. 

At the start of the next mission, there was an announcement throughout the city about the passing of their beloved High Overseer Campbell, who was a righteous man taken from this world too early- and other such nonsense. 

And i couldn’t do it. I reloaded the game and branded that motherfucker instead. 

If you kill him, he does not suffer. He is remembered fondly. 

If you ‘spare’ him, he suffers for months before succumbing to the plague, and his crimes and rotten nature are revealed to the city. 

So, the message isn’t as simple as ‘killing bad’, after all. There’s nuance here. 

And, most importantly. One of the things that i love about Dishonored’s handling of the chaos system and how it contributes to the gameplay and the overall narrative.

Is the fact that Corvo can fail. 

In the high chaos ending, if you don’t do it carefully, Emily, THE person Corvo is supposed to save and protect, can die. Corvo fails. The one thing that was the goal of the game, and he can fail. 

There’s way more nuance to Dishonored as a whole that i am NOT going to get into right now, or else we will be here all day. But my point here is, compared to that narrative significance of cruel/kind choices? DA could never compare. 

What happens if you take away the chaos system in Dh? The game becomes a shell of itself. Everything complex or interesting is immediately gone.

What happens if you take away the cruel OR the kind options in each of the DA games? Nothing much, really. The story stays largely the same. You just get there in slightly different ways. 

Of course, comparing Dishonored to DA is kind of an unfair thing to do. The genres are different, for one. The approach to continuity in the following games is different, too (with Dh using it's own canon for the sequel, while DA has to account for player choices). 

But i used that comparison mainly to illustrate that the significance of the cruel options in DA is…really overblown. 

The choices they offer are not complex. It’s easy to understand which is the morally better option: sell people into slavery or Not Do That. It’s not a grey choice, it’s pretty black and white. 

Genocide a people for the benefit of another or broker peace between them? Ohhh what a hard moral dilemma. 

Kill a lot of innocent people just in casies or come to their defense? Hmmm, however can i tell which one is the morally good choice here….

I can’t say that no one should ever enjoy playing the villain in an RPG game, nor do i want to say that. Go, be free, do whatever you want! I am also not saying that DA games are made worse by the presence of these choices. 

What i AM saying is that a lot of people mistake the mere presence of cruelty for complexity, and that Veilguard not having cruel choices (besides that one with the mayor i guess) does not make it less of a dragon age game than the other three. 

I love DA, i really do. Fucking. Look at my blog. 

But they’re just games, at the end of the day. They’re flawed, and some of them really don’t age well. But each one of them was made by people who care about the setting, the series, and the story being told in each game. You can feel that care as you play. So, what makes a dragon age game…a dragon age game? It’s not the cruelty available, that’s for sure.

I don’t know how coherent my point with this post is. My eyes kind of hurt so that definitely isn’t helping me concentrate. I think it’s silly to uphold the presence of cruelty as THE hallmark of a series, or what makes a good game. Sometimes it’s not about the cruelty. Sometimes it’s about people, and perseverance. 

Maybe one day I will actually go through the games with a fine tooth comb and make a proper analysis. But other people probably did that already, and better than i could.

At the end of the day, everyone has their own opinions and preferences. But these? These are MY onions <3 🧅🧅

[merulanoir]

Writer Interview

I was tagged by @xpityx <3

How many works do you have on AO3? 65!

What's your total AO3 word count? 1 445 234

Your top 5 stories by kudos? Muscle Memory, Winter Coat, Purpose, I Came Here Without a Choice, and Message. All from the good ol' Witcher fandom days. :)

Do you respond to comments? Oh yes, almost always. I keep hoping people would start more dialogue based on the replies, I love making friends that way.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? revealed (in absentia). It has an open ending, sort of hinting at the larger scale of unhappiness experienced by Corvo and Jess both.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? Probably The End of Gifts. I love happy endings that have a hint of bittersweet in them. Sewn to Your Sleeve is kinda like that too. It feels better to have a happy ending where some things cannot be recovered or they don't stay the same.

Do you write crossovers? Sometimes. I've done at least Dishonored/Death Stranding, and I have a CoD/Locked Tomb one in the works. :D My favorite brand of crossover to write is taking characters from one world and chucking them into another. I love figuring out where and how they fit into another set of rules.

Have you ever received hate on a fic? At most people leave entitled or kind of rude comments, but that's very rare.

Do you write smut? Do I ever!

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Luckily not, I think. Someone put reviews on fucking Goodreads once.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yep, at least to Russian and Chinese. It's a special kind of honor.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Several, and I love doing it. My partner and I have written hundreds of thousands of words of RP, and some of that has been published.

What's a wip that you want to finish but don't think you ever will? I never fully give up on WIPs, but the Night Vale/SPN crossover has now been in the limbo for almost a decade, so. :D

What are your writing strengths? Worldbuilding and plots, I think. I love writing shortform stuff, but these days I gravitate towards longfic by default. I have lots of words stuck in my brain, and I think I'm pretty good at coming up with stories.

What are your writing weaknesses? I mean, sometimes I wish I could go back to banging out short fics. Also one of these days I will get around to learning English punctuation, prommy. On the other side, I want to get better at writing characters who are not introspective fuckers. Lately I have been deliberately trying to write the blorbos being less likeable and/or making choices that cannot be justified, which is its own kind of fun and actually harder than you'd think.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? Complicated. I'm not a native English speaker, so I'm already navigating in another language than the one I spoke growing up. My general opinion is that sometimes it can add something to the story (for example, writing from the POV of a character who doesn't understand what's being said), but unfortunately there are ten bad choices for every good one lol. Single words and phrases, especially something that's like a trademark for a character, are alright.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to? Hmm. I'm bad at keeping my fingers away from things I want to play with. I'm going to nominate the Dorian/Bull fic I have as a WIP, that's a delicious ship I haven't touched yet in terms of publishing anything.

---

Tagging @sorrelchestnut @tacticaltaxonomist @flowers-all-around-me if yall wanna ramble. >:)

[crowseers]

hello <3 who are your top 5 dishonored characters and why? asking a couple people and would love to know your favs!

Hiiii!! This is so embarrassing (mostly because they're a obvious) but..

- Havelock

Not a whole lot of people's fav, which, fair i guess but i think I know maybe 3 people who love him and two of them are me and my boyfriend LOL. Anyways, he's awfully interesting to me, even as a character that doesn't seem very fleshed out. The small details about his brother, the "bloodlust," all of that just itch a part of my brain.

- Martin

I think of this guy pretty often too, who would've thought! But, yeah, Martin feels like a character meant for a lot more than what was shown, lots of discarded voice lines and scenes that make me so so sad seeing how they were cut. He's interesting in my favorite way: "fucked around and found out."

Constantly also forget he's not canonically trans LOL

- Billie

Ggghhrg god i love her. Seeing her for the first time in the KoD DLCS was genuinely an ethereal experience. Finding her journal and just wanting to know more about the teenage girl that followed an assassin to his doorstep that ended up basically taking her in. Her relationship with Delilah is complicated and honestly pretty tragic. I know a lot of it gets boiled down to "delilah painted and controlled her," but i think it was so much more than that.

- Treavor

Pathetic and sad. Like one of those cats that dunked their head into a food bowl. Reeeeeallly wish we got to see more development from him, good or bad due to the torment suffered but hey. I think he's a liar for fun or to make himself look better, but at the end of the day: he's the only loyalist that actually has some sort of life history. I would love to talk about my extremely specific hcs for him but alas, another time.

the "i think im transfem but we're in a conspiracy so idc about that rn."

- Corvo

Obvious reasoning: the coolest guy on the planet i love him.

Other than that though: i think he's just incredibly well written. His acts of mercy aren't particularly kind but they're fitting and don't result in death by his hand. His relationship with Emily is so sweet and i think it's cute how much she looks up to him.

[astrxthesiai]

Some thoughts, and I'll finish up my dailies.

I loved watching Dishonored's playthrough back in the day, and I think my Rafayel muse would love the game because of his combat style. It's one of the rare games he would play. The reason also includes its lore. I think he would also sympathize and not sympathize with The Outsider greatly because of his role as the God of Tides. (My Rafayel has complicated feelings towards being the God of Tides, and I interpreted it as such. I don't know if my fellow Rafayel writers feel the same or similarly.)

I'd love a scenario in which Rafayel plays The Outsider and MC or one of the LIs is Corvo. I think MC would fit better as the Empress, because her heart is essentially used to locate items. I just watched a short where it's interpreted its the Empress' punishment for the fact that whaling has helped her country achieve a considerable rise. She cannot achieve peace in death until she makes amends for the pain she caused the leviathans. ))

[ooksaidthelibrarian]

When the first green shoots appear on the vines, the bees venture out to visit the willows and the geese fly north, Eskel gets restless. Winter at Corvo was what he needs, but winter is over now. He misses his home, and he misses the sea.  Eskel goes home, but he takes a detour

Of a Fearsome Mind Chapter 33: For the Spring to Come Again

***

'I'm back.' Saying it feels like a promise, to take up the life they had here and continue with it. A promise he has every intention of fulfilling. Eskel is home, and new things begin

Chapter 34: The Remembering Will Be Sweeter Yet

Fandom: The Witcher (Video Game) Rating: E Words: 2280 and 1043, 66282 for the whole work Pairing: Eskel/Shani

Read it here on AO3

Read it here on Squidgeworld

I finished this a while ago, and now the last chapter is posted. I am a little sad and super happy at the same time. It took me almost two years to write, and I am very pleased with how it turned out. It went to places I didn't plan for it to go, but it always was a joy to write. It broke my heart and then it put it back together again. 

Sexual Abuse

Witcher Trials (The Witcher)

Witcher Training (The Witcher)

Witchers Have Feelings (The Witcher)

Childhood Trauma

Trauma

Past Child Abuse

Kaer Morhen (The Witcher)

Father Figures

POV Eskel (The Witcher)

Eskel and Vesemir have a complicated relationship

It's fucked up

more than in canon

Eskel Whump (The Witcher)

Angst

Hurt

Eventual Happy Ending

Mayfly/December Relationship

What's a Witcher When He's Not a Witcher

Building A New Life

Grief/Mourning

Complete

[kiwiwinjindouche]

@lapinneok sooo(rry for the tag)

[...]who are her fathers? :0

Well, more like "adoptive fathers", sorry for the confusion!! I meant Corvo/Kirin. Kirin never really adopted her in a "legal way", he just kind of took her into his mansion and they started to vibe. Don't get me wrong, Kirin is terrible at being a 'decent father figure'. I don't think he'd consider himself as such either. Moreover, Corvo and Kirin won't ever get married (at least I don't think they would?) (and she has a complicated relationship with Corvo that doesn't help) (but both still care at least a bit about her)

[...]aldina's is more of a mystery (what will she do!!! haha)[...]

Thank you!!!! (probably nothing good lol 👀​) indeed!! Not even Kirin is spared from this. She knows the insides of the mansion so well now, crawling here and there like a little mouse. It became one funny playground to her! (sometimes Kirin regrets his choice to have invited her in)

ivanoe's fate is so tragic[...]

Ivanoe's really just there to die and bring trauma to them 😩​ and nope, nothing horrible's planned for Marisol… For now at least (hahah jk… Unless?? Oh no, I want to add more drama to them now)

Marisol would tell him she has a kid already, and another one on the way, but not decided on a name yet. She asks Kirin if he has some ideas, if he'd like to still be part of it after all this time, and his answer's pretty clear atm: not really. He's still trying to process how he feels exactly about Corvo.

But moving on to a few days later, I thought he could reconsider this and gives her possible names? Not that he actually wants to see the kid(s) (he's still very much uncomfortable around them and such) but Corvo could have convinced him to not being a jerk for once, even more to an old friend? (please tell me if I'm going way too ooc dkdndkdnls)

Also obviously Marisol will start talking about Adrian and Corvo

New chart and we can clearly see the new ones lol: Marisol and Ivanoe are at the center! ft Dulce the cat (killed by Kirin oopsie)

As for the fic, it has been seating on my mind for more than 2 years I think? But I keep going back to it, changing things so Kirin and Corvo's relationship might be more coherent, adding some lore, reorganizing the chapters, and… Taking a huge break on it to play Baldur's Gate 3 instead. RIP. But I think it was needed, cuz I could have a fresher look at it? And as I struggle to finish it in French, I'm reminded I actually have to translate it in English next, and my soul leaves my mortal body to break down among the stars

(I have like, 3 or 4 different drafts, longer one was 57 pages on word which is one of the longest things I've ever written so far and I found things to change/add so now I'm getting afraid of myself)

(it's mostly another 'BUT WHAT IF we could bring Jindosh on the Dreadful Wale too' with my OCs saying 'hi', nothing really new I suppose but I don't want to care much about it cuz maybe the main plot isn't new but I'm bringing my ideas to it too and bruh I just want to write about them so whatever) (there're more or less 18 chapters planned) (idk if that answers your 'question'?) (also yes I'll try to add Aldina to it too, or maybe save it for another thing someday)

haiii! 8 for Aldina and 9 for anyone because im interested in general!

(also i'd like to know about Marisol and Ivanoe 👁👁)

Yippee!!! :D

Thank you for your interest!!!! <3

8. Would your OC ostensibly be able to get away with murder?

Yes. Aldina could probably talk her way out of it, or if things get worse, ask for help from her fathers.

9. Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

I can answer to that with a few of them. I have to think about this for the newer OCs (aka young Kirin's "crew", mostly).

For Vincent, I decided to go with the last line from The Sands Of Serkonos: "We'll slip onto a whaler and maybe we'll escape".

He's been in Karnaca for a few years now, and that song might be one of his favorites. I think he likes to listen to the songs people sing in the streets.

To stay with the whole 'whaler' thing, Aldina's one is simply from The Drunken Whaler: "What will we do with a drunken whaler…"

I like to think they kind of respond to each other, in some way. Also Aldina loves to creep people and to sing slow, disturbing lullabies while behind the walls, at the mansion.

Now, less lyrics and more quotes.

For Sybill, it had to be a Sherlock one, obviously, and I went with one from BBC Sherlock (which I love a lot): "What is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so boring."

I think it suits her and is a good sum up on which kind of person she can be!

And I've got one for Caleb (the grumpy man in the navy). It's from Niccolò Machiavelli: "It is not titles that honor men but men that honor titles."

He has a strong sense of honor and puts a lot of importance to this kind of things. If it wasn't for that one, I would probably have chose another lyric but from Honor For All.

And that's it for the asks! As for Marisol and Ivanoe!! :D

I still have to do better references for them, I only have a small sketch of their heads.

Both are from Karnaca. Ivanoe was a very kind soul, living with his mother. He was 3 years older than Kirin. He liked to take care of the stray animals, the ones even more easily forgotten by Karnaca's cruelty. Always hurt somewhere, too many lights scars on the body, taking care of the unwanted.

He really, really hated Kirin. For his lack of empathy, for that time he killed a cat out of curiosity. Why would anyone in the group let him stay? he's dangerous. But he's Adrian's little brother and the others were fine with his presence.

Unfortunately, one day, Ivanoe disappeared, only to be found by the group few days later. He's been killed by bloodflies. That left a mark on them (except for Kirin, he didn't care much, said it was his own fault).

Marisol's parents were whalers, and they died at sea. She's 4 years older than Kirin, and was in love with Adrian. Young Kirin was a tiny bit jealous, but Marisol had interesting things to say - sometimes - so m'okay you can stay with my brother I suppose? (more or less)

She's always love to draw and had an artistic soul. So, when Kirin was still in Dunwall, at the Academy, and Adrian died in the mines, she decided to leave for Morley. She wanted to stay away from Karnaca, to take a break from the city that ruined her life (Ivan's death didn't help either). She'll have a hard start, but will eventually get a renown there and finally marry another man, Octave (I've talked about him before I think!) Octave is also a very artistic one, interested by animation.

When Octave heard more about Kirin's silvergraphs, and his will to animate things too with them, he wanted to go to Karnaca and meet him, and Marisol followed him, thinking it was finally time for her to go back there and fight her demons. And so, they meet again, after all those years, and start to talk about their life, the changes, and the past.

I'm really too invested into young Kirin's life for some reasons xD Kirin was lonely, but his brother wasn't, so in my headcanons Kirin was squatting (I lack a more proper word lmao) Adrian's group mostly, because Adrian cared about him and didn't want him to stay alone and the such. And (almost) everyone was fine with it.

And I'm adding some interludes with them in my fanfic! I NEED TO FINISH THAT DAMN FANFIC

[dedecorus]

obsessed with Corvo defeating Delilah and walking past Emily to take the throne, becoming Corvo the Black, because he's so tortured over the fact he was unable to protect his Empress AGAIN, that it's preferable for her to be trapped in stone forever at his feet than risk failing to protect her again

[eskelbigbang]

Eskel Big Bang 2021 Masterpost

Here are all the fics and art made this year for the Eskel Big Bang. Congratulations on the hard work, everyone!

AO3 collection || #ebb works tag || #ebb art tag || #ebb fic tag

Below the cut is a full list of all EBB works:

Uprooted (T, No Pairing, 12k) by @rachofspades, art by @drachedraws

When a nondescript notice begging for a witcher's aid catches Eskel's attention on his way back to Kaer Morhen for the winter, he finds himself drawn in by his own curiosity despite his initial reservations. Once he arrives, it quickly becomes apparent that there's something more sinister going on than typical monster attacks, and he's determined to figure out what it is. Fic || Art (1) (2)

These Clay Hands (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 4.7k) by @aalizazareth, art by @hobbart-art

Eskel is a shy pottery instructor who meets Jaskier during one of his lessons. The two hit it off. Fic || Art

The Empty Safe Job (M, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 18k) by @iboughtaplant, art by @gods-no-longer-tread-here

A team of thieves with complicated pasts take down the rich and powerful to help those that get left out from justice. Their latest job should be simple, but an unexpected adversary has Eskel confronting his past. Sometimes bad guys make the best good guys. Fic || Art

the broken vines are an open door (M, Eskel & Geralt & Yennefer, 5.2k) by @trissmarrygoals, art by @flyingyarn

Traveling through Aedirn with his newly acquired child surprise, Eskel stumbles upon a dead body - and with it, a mystery. Fic || Art

With you I'll never be alone (T, Eskel/Geralt, 5.8k) by @dat-carovieh, art by @mondfuchs

From their first meeting, through their whole long life Geralt and Eskel have always been there to comfort each other when one of them got hurt. --- Or five times Geralt and Eskel comfort each other through some kind of hurt and one time they're just comfortable. Fic || Art

Eskel Has A Good Day (G, Eskel & Wolf Witchers, 9.3k) by @gods-no-longer-tread-here, art by @phoenixandjacob

The Wolves (and bard) of Kaer Morhen go on a vacation to the coast, and have a good day. Fic || Art (1) (2)

Tu Me Manques. (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 8k) by @etcorsolus, art by @cvbeebop

In which, Eskel meets a bard who calms him. Body, mind, and soul. Story title is how the French say 'I miss you.' The more literal translation is 'You are missing from me.' Fic || Art

Little Red (M, Eskel/Lambert, 6.1k) by @miahclone, art by @llwynbleidd

Eskel helps Lambert while he's recovering from a serious injury. To distract him from the pain, Eskel tells stories of past hunts. Fic || Art

Constellations (M, Eskel/Geralt, 7.2k) by @dredshirtroberts, art by @dat-carovieh

Eskel loves Geralt but their soulmarks don't match - he'd know. They're witchers, and scars are their business. As he joins Geralt in retirement, Eskel figures whatever he can get with the other witcher will be enough. He might get a little bit more than he thought he was bargaining for, but Eskel's never passed up a good deal. Fic || Art (1) (2)

Trial By Fire (Eskel and Aza's Wild Ride) (E, Eskel/OFC, 11k) by @janzoo, art by @liaonyxrayne

When Eskel rescues his succubus acquaintance from witch hunters, their reunion becomes something more as they're drawn into the hunters' plot. What can they do against a twisted idealist and the danger he presents to witchers and non-humans? Fic || Art

Pardon Me While I Burst Into Flames (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 29k) by @ghostinthelibrarywrites, art by @wolfgeralt

When Eskel is hired to kill an incubus who ruined a noble wedding, he finds that his target is far from a bloodthirsty beast, a too-pretty court bard. Eskel spares Jaskier and they go their separate ways, with Eskel expecting never to see the incubus again. But Jaskier has other ideas. Fic || Art

I Could Eat the World Raw (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 7k) by @buttercupsanddandelions, art by @gods-no-longer-tread-here

“This is Eskel.” He pushes him slightly forward, “And he just had his conduit moment.” After becoming a mage, Eskel finds that he's been soul-bound to a little lordling. Fic || Art

Something we bury (M, Eskel/Geralt, 10k) by @heartoferebor, art by @craftgamerzz

“Where’s Eskel?” Ciri asks Geralt, frowning a little. “He went out to do more hunting and gather some potion ingredients. Should be back any moment,” Geralt reassures her. “Ah. Good.” She hesitates a little before deciding to forge right ahead with her next question. She’s asked everyone else in the keep, of course she’ll have to ask Geralt, too. “About his scars…” * Ciri wants to know where Eskel's scars came from, so she decides to ask everyone at the keep about them. Except, they all seem to have different stories... Fic || Art

Lord What Fools These Witchers Be (T, Aiden/Eskel, 21k) by @jayofolympus and @frenchkey, art by aviixrc

When Lambert brings Aiden to winter with him in Kaer Morhen, Eskel is catapulted straight into his own personal hell. It would be easier if he didn’t like the Cat. Instead, he finds himself falling head over heels for his brother’s boyfriend and trying to hide it from a pack of nosy Witchers. If only Aiden would stop flirting with him... Fic || Art (1) (2)

A Moment of Comfort (M, Eskel/OC) by @merpancake

An attack at a brothel begins with blood and carnage, but Eskel finds an unexpected peace in the arms of Cenna. As their paths continue to cross, Eskel carries that same peace within him on his journey through monsters and men. Art

Toussaint's Finest (M, Eskel/Geralt, 9.1k) by @kate-river, art by @justhereforeskel

Eskel is still roaming the Continent. But in recent years the Path has become harder and harder. Eskel has made it a habit to come by Corvo Bianco around vintage and this year's events might change a few things in his life forever. Fic || Art

Beneath the Shadow and the Soul (E, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 32k) by @vix-spes, art by @buffskierights

Eskel had the strange feeling that everything was going to change when he passed through Dol Blathanna one year on his way back to Kaer Morhen for winter. He had been passing through a town and, instead of running away from him, someone had exclaimed “You’re a Witcher,” and proceeded to sing at him. He just hadn't realised how much of an impact it would have on him. Fic || Art

Daughter of Fire (T, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 4.9k) by @kittynannygaming, art by @zmezagain

Witchers are sterile, that's a fact. No female human can bear their child. Well, the keyword here is 'human' and a succubus is very not human. And Eskel now has a sweet 7 years old daughter. Fic || Art

Break It Recklessly (E, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 22k) by @anonymousblueberry, art by @nol-nol

From teenage tearaways to successful adults, Geralt and Eskel have always been inseparable. To the extent that when Geralt accepts a wedding invite with Eskel as his plus one, there’s the assumption that they have finally sorted their shit out and got together, forcing them to keep up the facade or cause chaos for the happy couple. What follows is a crash course in emotions, dating, and working out that love can burn long and slow for a very long time. Fic || Art

The Question (M, Eskel/Istredd, 40k) by @eskelchopchop, art by @stars-in-my-damn-eyes

Eskel's in Ohio when Yennefer calls. He’s reluctant to pick up; he’s still not over Geralt, and he's got zero desire to chat with Geralt's new lover. Turns out Yen isn’t his lover anymore, and this isn’t about Geralt. It’s about witcher’s work. Yennefer owns Portal, one of New York City's most popular gay clubs. A Post-Conjunction Entity (PCE) is hunting her clientele, leaving a string of withered corpses in its wake. The police are doing jackshit. Will Eskel come back to a city full of bad memories and take a job off the books to stop it? He'll sure as hell try. Along the way, he’ll cross paths with Istredd, a man with sorcerer’s eyes and a painful past of his own. If Eskel doesn't work fast enough, they both might become the PCE's next victims. Fic || Art

Is It Cold In The Water? (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 12k) by @jennyloggins, art by @jerry-of-rivia

His horse is tied to a branch a few trees out, and that’s where Eskel heads to grab his water skein, taking a deep drink and soothe his dry throat. Patting his horse’s backside affectionately on his way past her, Eskel feigns a stern voice to say, “Zuzanna, keep watch for me.” Her tail twitches as if to swat him away. Fic || Art

Everything I Want (I Can Find in You) by @eyesofshinigami, art by @phoenixandjacob

Eskel didn't think he'd ever see Jaskier again, sure the Cat witcher was only looking for a night of fun. But then he keeps showing up, taking Eskel to bed and leaving him little presents. It takes Eskel a bit, but eventually he realizes that maybe, just maybe, Jaskier means it when he says he wants to keep him. Or Eskel doesn't think he deserves nice things and Jaskier is determined to show him otherwise. Fic || Art

One Stop Shop; Tattoo's Piercings, And Love (M, Eskel/Jaskier/Lambert, 7.4k) by @jesheckah, art by @moondrunkart

When Eskel fumbles an invitation at a party to come into his tattoo shop, Jaskier and he move towards an explosive love. How many tattoo sessions does it take for the heart to know what it wants? Fic || Art

Entanglement (and other words for a mess) (E, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 31k) by @violaceum-vitellina-viridis, art by @merpancake

Eskel has a hundred marks on his body, but a soulmark isn't one of them. Fic || Art

Beneath Each Other's Bones (E, Eskel/Geralt, 7.6k) by @pressedinthepages, art by @drachedraws

Winter at Kaer Morhen can be brutal. But Eskel and Geralt find warmth in each other in an effort to stave off the cold. Fic || Art (1) (2)

#9fe2bf on the Shore (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 4.5k) by @buffskierights, art by @phoenixandjacob

The sea roars with a vengeance, something angering the waves even as the stars shine brightly overhead in the clear night sky. If Eskel were a poet he’d say it almost sounded like a wail of mourning, the way the whitewater crashes upon the night black sand and the gathering foam, the sea frothing furiously. But Eskel’s always hated his poetry lessons so being a poet is firmly off the table. Fic || Art

lion in the wolf's den (T, Coen/Eskel, 5k) by @patchwork-doublet, art by @justhereforeskel

eskel is nervous being around ciri, afraid things will go south like they did last time. Fic || Art

Sugar Baby Blues (E, Eskel/Jaskier, 24k) by adevinecomedy, art by @pastelrune

Jaskier’s mind slipped back to a night several months ago when he was all worked up but had nowhere to go and a mountain of school work to get through. How it was just so much easier to log onto a camming website and watch someone perform seemingly just for him. The gorgeous, confident man on the other side of the screen had been so accommodating, even though Jaskier had been shy and hadn’t typed much into the chat. Modern au where Eskel is a Cam boy and runs into a bit of a financial bind. Enter Jaskier who just might be the answer to all his woes. Fic || Art

Winter Comfort (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 10k) by @myidlehand, art by @liaonyxrayne

Jaskier comes to Kaer Morhen to spend some time with Eskel, after briefly meeting him in the fall. And while both of them seem delighted to see each other again, Eskel starts to shy away from Jaskier's comments and flirting. It doesn't take a genius to see Eskel is having body image issue. Jaskier aims to help him through it. Fic || Art

The Subtle Knife (M, Eskel/Jaskier, 26k) by @major-trouble, art by @cylin-aka-ankamo

There's an assassin haunting the Continent. No one knows their name, everyone - that is, everyone in the know - calls them The Specter. If you want a rival out of the way, a political opponent disposed of, or a strategic target taken out, contacting The Specter gets the job done. For a price, of course. There's an art to subtlety, after all, and it wouldn't do to risk the attention of law enforcement. So there's no obvious cause, no knife to the back, and the deaths aren't usually remarked upon. The Kaer Morhen Agency, however, has noticed. One of their agents has been hired to protect potential victims, people scared that they've been targeted. And they have reason to worry. When Eskel's first assignment winds up dead of no discernible cause, it starts him on a search for the elusive Specter, hoping against hope to track down the assassin before they're hired again. Setting a trap for a ghost is something Witchers are used to. Setting one for a trained killer may prove beyond them. Fic || Art

No Funny Business (M, Eskel/Jaskier, 11k) by goldendaydreams, art by @nanero11

Eskel had long given up on finding his soulmate, his soulmark nothing but scar tissue from a house fire he’d survived as a child. Knowing that most people wait for their perfect someone, their destiny, didn’t stop him from falling in love with Jaskier, the nurse he met after a hunt gone wrong. Fic || Art

Stronger Than My Storm (E, Eskel/Geralt) by @rawrkinjd, art by @nol-nol

Eskel and Geralt were friends from the very beginning. They added the benefits later. It was another way to offer comfort and companionship when the rest of the world closed in around them, and Eskel was content with it for years. Until he wakes up one day and realises it’s become something more. He touches Geralt’s silver hair, wreathed in a halo of yellow sunlight, and allows himself to feel the cracks spreading through his heart. Witchers can’t love each other. It would only lead to suffering. Eskel realises he must weather the storm inside or let Geralt go forever. Fic || Art

Full of Life (T, Eskel/Jaskier, 6.3k) by @sternenstaub28, art by @llwynbleidd

When Eskel gets hired to solve the case of people disappearing in town, she didn’t know she’d find a friend and maybe even something more. or Beauty and strength don't necessarily make your life easier, a companion and love however do. Fic || Art

choices are the hinges of destiny (T, Eskel/Geralt, 7.5k) by @lutes-and-dandelions, art by @cassandrasartworld

After rescuing a fae from the clutches of death, they repay Eskel by helping him make a choice. -oOo- A story about what would have happened if Eskel had claimed his child of surprise. Fic || Art

Eskel Vs The Continent (And His Feelings) (M, No Pairing, 47k) by @chibitabathasloves, art by @zmezagain

Eskel decides he needs to leave Kaer Morhen after the fight with the Hunt. Where will it take him? And will he be able to face his feelings he desperately tries to ignore. Fic || Art

lookin' to the sky to save me (T, Eskel/Geralt, 10k) by @torynickles, art by @trissmarrygoals

Geralt slides his hand from Eskel’s shoulder to his back. And then. Then he keeps moving it, outwards, away from Eskel’s torso, where there should be nothing but air, but— “What the fuck?” he chokes, because he can still feel Geralt’s hand, sensation where there should be none. He shakes his head wildly, twisting his arm to reach for his own back. His fingers connect to something, but—it’s not his body, it can’t be his body, even though he can feel himself touching it. Because he’s made up of skin and flesh, bone and muscle, and this thing has all of those, but— It’s covered in sticky, damp feathers. Fic || Art

A Fine Night at the Faire (M, Eskel/Geralt/Jaskier, 12k) by Elensule, art by @liaonyxrayne

Eskel has been hurt by the world and hides for refuge in his little goat farm. He's found no reason to look for love, or much of anything else. But encouragement from his brother sends him to an unfamiliar locale; the renfaire! Maybe stepping out of his comfort zone was just what he needed. Fic || Art

[havenoffandoms]

The Weaker We Feel (The Harder We Lean)

Pairing: Geralt/Eskel/Lambert

Summary:  Geralt both hates and loves winters at Kaer Morhen, but in recent years, the pain in his knee has only gotten worse, which seriously dampens his mood and makes winters more and more unbearable as the years go on. Sometimes, Geralt considers wintering in Corvo Bianco, or even in the City of Golden Towers with Ciri in the Emperor’s palace, where the milder winters would be kinder on his injured knee. But his family is up in the North, and Geralt will endure a few months of physical discomfort if it means spending time with his lovers and Vesemir.

Warnings: canonically disabled character, angst

Geralt both loves and hates the winters at Kaer Morhen.

He loves the peace and quiet he enjoys in the only home he truly remembers. The keep is a safe haven, a place where Geralt can just be without feeling the crushing weight of responsibility and duty on his shoulders. Kaer Morhen is where his family is, where Vesemir awaits the return of his three surviving pups with a pot of steaming stew, warmed up ale, and other treats that the witchers so rarely get to enjoy on the Path. Kaer Morhen is where Eskel and Lambert are, welcoming Geralt back home with warm embraces, desperate kisses, and tender caresses. The keep is the only place where the three witchers feel safe enough to openly show their affection for each other, away from prying eyes and judgemental comments they so often face in the world outside of Kaer Morhen. This ramshackle castle is Geralt’s home , a home he cherishes and would defend with his life if it came to it.

Kaer Morhen, for all the safety and small comforts Geralt associates the place with, does come with its drawbacks. The castle is closer to a ruin now. The place that once was inhabited by hundreds is far too big now for the four surviving wolf witchers. Returning to his dilapidated home is always bittersweet for Geralt. Kaer Morhen evokes all sorts of memories. The better ones involve Geralt and Eskel painting the castle red with their (mostly) harmless pranks, two mischievous boys who found solace in each other in this strange and foreign place. Geralt also fondly remembers other boys in his year; Aubry, Gweld and Gardis, who all bunked in the same dormitory as Eskel and Geralt. Frank occasionally joined them too, though he was quieter and usually stuck to Aubry like glue.

Some memories Geralt tries not to linger on. The trials, the sacking, the Tournament, the drills, receiving a beating in master Rennes’ office, dead boys being carried out to the funeral pyres when they failed to survive the Grasses. Those memories Geralt works so hard to repress have a way of resurfacing the second he steps foot inside the keep. Sometimes, Geralt looks up and sees Eskel staring absently in the distance, glassy-eyed and drunk on black gull, lost so far in the whirlwind of his own tormented mind that Geralt cannot hope to pull him back. Other times, Geralt catches Lambert wiping his eyes angrily with the back of his hand when he comes back from his fishing trip near the lake. Geralt recently found out that Lambert always goes on a pilgrimage to the caves north of Kaer Morhen, Old Speartip’s dwelling place before Lambert and Geralt killed him several years prior, to honour the memory of his dear friend Voltehre.

Geralt both loves and hates winters at Kaer Morhen, but the most challenging aspect for him is the cold. The biting wind and harsh winter temperatures manage to seep through every crack, hole, and fissure in the walls, lesions which are far too numerous for only four witchers to keep on top of every winter. Keeping the fires going every winter is no straightforward task. At the height of winter, the snow has a way of trapping the witchers inside and considerably complicating the task of leaving their sanctuary to gather and chop up firewood. Although Geralt has his lovers to keep him warm, even the human furnaces that are Eskel and Lambert cannot soothe the way the nerves in Geralt’s knees flare up during the winter months. Sometimes the pain is so intense that Geralt’s entire leg seizes up, making it impossible for him to get out of bed without hobbling. It’s degrading, even more so when Eskel has to support him so Geralt doesn’t faceplant the floor, or when Lambert has to carry him to the hot springs, the kitchen, or even the privy because Geralt feels lightheaded from the pain.

Geralt both hates and loves winters at Kaer Morhen, but in recent years, the pain in his knee has only gotten worse, which seriously dampens his mood and makes winters more and more unbearable as the years go on. Sometimes, Geralt considers wintering in Corvo Bianco, or even in the City of Golden Towers with Ciri in the Emperor’s palace, where the milder winters would be kinder on his injured knee. But his family is up in the North, and Geralt will endure a few months of physical discomfort if it means spending time with his lovers and Vesemir.

Continue reading on Ao3. 

[longing-and-heartache-and-lust]

Prompt: Going to a Fair Relationships (romantic/platonic/etc): Geralt/Jaskier Rating: Teen Audiences And Up Content Warnings: None Summary: A beautiful thing about Toussaint is the fairs and masquerades the dutchess holds every now and then. And the big canopy beds. Oh, those are the best part.

[This one turned out to a little all over the place but I still really enjoyed writing it. Hope you’ll enjoy it too, my darlings.]

@sugar-and-spice-witcher-bingo

Crossposted on ao3 here

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Geralt, my love, you look wonderful, stop being so hard on yourself," Jaskier says, wrapping his arms around the witcher's waist and hugging him from the back, locking eyes with him through the mirror.

Geralt doesn't really share the bard's enthusiasm. He's used to his armour, to thick black leather with only a few elements of silver, and that is what feels natural, what feels right.

A dark-crimson - almost wine-red, really - doublet with intricate embroidery in gold thread does not.

He knows that he'd agreed to this himself, knows that Jaskier had told him that if he doesn't want to go, he won't get upset with him and just go with Barnabas-Basil or one of his friends. But Geralt always went out of his way to make his husband happy.

So, naturally, when Jaskier told him that there's going to be a masquerade and a fair in Beauclair, he couldn't say no.

"The dutchess herself is said to be there," Jaskier murmurs against his neck, smiling encouragingly. "I'm sure she will be delighted to see you. After all, we were personally invited, weren't we?"

"Isn't the whole point of a masquerade is for the participants not to recognise each other?" Geralt tries, weakly.

"Oh, don't be like that," Jaskier huffs, waving a hand dissmissingly. "It's going to be fun, I promise. Besides, isn't Regis going to be there?"

That's true, Geralt supposes. Regis is going to be there, which makes the event slightly more bearable. It's always nice to talk to an old friend.

"He is," he hums, adjusting the collar od his shirt. "Going to keep me company when you run off to flirt with the next pretty little thing you see."

Jaskier just laughs at that, circling Geralt to stand in front of him and take his face into his hands, getting a stray strand of silver out of his eyes.

"You know that never leads to anything," he smiles, leaning in to touch the witcher's dry lips with his own. "I can innocently flirt with everyone I see but it's only you I love, my darling. And only you I want."

Geralt does know that. He's not even jealous, never doubting Jaskier's faithfulness but missing an opportunity to tease would've been a waste.

"I know," he finally says, stealing another kiss. "And yet, if the dutchess herself is going to be there... She's got an eye for you, you know. Would be terribly rude of you to turn down such an important woman."

Jaskier snickers and shakes his head, eyes crinkling at the corners.

"Then it's a good thing that she's not going to recognise me."

-

When they arrive, the event is already in full swing.

Jaskier's eyes light up at the music that flows through the garden and the way he squeezes Geralt's hand suddenly makes the entire thing worth it in the witcher's mind.

Jaskier looks breathtaking in his dark-blue silk suit, the silver mask hiding just enough of his face for it to be almost impossible to recognise him yet leaving enough open for Geralt to still have the option of pulling his close and kissing him. in the witcher's mind, it couldn't be more perfect.

"May I hear the password?" asks one of the guards at the gates, his own face hidden behind a mask with a long beak.

"Waterlilies," Jaskier says, repeating what's been written in their invitations.

The guard nods and gestures to the doors.

"If you'll be so kind as to follow me," he says. "Our most generous dutchess Anna Henrietta has arranged a room for you so that you don't have to make a long journey back home at night."

There is nothing about Jaskier's expression - half-hidden by the mask - that gives away his delight but Geralt knows him well enough to be able to smell it on him. Jaskier is, after all, of a noble family, a court man, and Geralt knows just how much he loves it when he's treated like one, even though most of the time he happily trades it for the life on the Path.

Corvo Bianco, it seemed, was the perfect middle ground.

They follow the guard through the garden and into a big, richly decorated estate with stained-glass windows and luscious flowers hanging in big round pots. The guard takes them to the upper floor, opens the door with a key and gestures for Geralt and Jaskier to step inside and make themselves comfortable.

"If there shall be anything you need, the servants are on the ground floor, you need only call," he says, adjusting the cuffs of his sleeves and handing Jaskier the key. "Enjoy your night, gentleman."

With that, he bows and leaves, leaving Jaskier and Geralt alone in the room.

"Oh, this reminds me of home," Jaskier sighs, a smile on his lips as he falls onto a truly enormous canopy bed covered with red velvet.

"Of home?" Geralt echoes, almost feeling out of place in such a rich interior.

"Well, you know, my childhood home," Jaskier says, propping himself up on both elbows. "I have to be honest with you, Geralt, I miss all of this from time to time."

The witcher comes closer, sits on the edge of the bed, runs his hand over the velvet and sighs, content. It does feel nice.

"Do you think we could get a bed like this for the vineyard?" Jaskier asks, pushing him down onto his back and lying down next to him, finding Geralt's hand and bringing it up to his lips to press a kiss to the knuckles. "It's not only amazing to sleep in but also-" his eyes light up behind his mask, and Geralt knows a little too well what that means. "Look at those poles, my love. I could let you tie my wrists to them if you were to wish for it."

Oh, that sounds tempting.

"Hmm," Geralt hums, non-commital. "Sounds intriguing. Though I might need to try first and then decide. After all, finding this kind of bed is not easy."

It takes Jaskier a second to understand what exactly it is that Geralt is saying but then he gasps in mock offence and shoves him in the shoulder with no real force.

"Preposterous!" he gasps, a hand over his heart. "This is the dutchess' cousin's summer residence, and this is, I'm more than sure, the best guest bedroom. Anarietta herself might be sleeping in this bed while visiting."

"Yes," Geralt says simply, knowing that all of that only adds to Jaskier's interest. "And tonight this bed is ours."

-

Before that conversation can take them anywhere, Jaskier demands they go back to the garden.

Geralt doesn't object, just follows the bard down the stairs and helps him adjust his doublet before they step out the door. He feels just a little strange with his hair done up in a complicated bun but then again, Jaskier told him that it will help the witcher be even less recognisable, and there was never anything that Geralt could deny him.

The disguise was, it seemed, working effectively for they've almost bumped into Anarietta - Geralt recognised her by smell - when passing the gates again but she didn't notice them. Or, at least, she didn't come up to them, to Geralt's immeasurable relief. He'd only ever said it to Jaskier but the dutchess was getting on his nerves and if he could avoid her, he gladly did just that.

"There's a Gwent tournament somewhere in the north side of the garden, as far as I'm aware," Jaskier says, making a non-descriptive gesture in the general direction, as they walk past a table with all sorts of baked sweets. "If you're interested."

Even with Jaskier, Geralt feels somewhat out of place at an event like this. And a few rounds of Gwent sound like a perfect way to forget about it.

"Sounds tempting," he says, reaching to brush his fingers over Jaskier's and take his hand into his own. He's still getting used to it. "Though you know I prefer to play with you."

Jaskier rolls his eyes in fond exasperation.

"That's because every time we play, you insist that we play strip Gwent, knowing perfectly that you're a better player than me," he chuckles. "Honestly, Geralt, all you need to do for me to undress is ask."

"I know," the witcher grins, pulling Jaskier closer to shamelessly press a kiss to his cheek. "But where's the fun in that?"

-

He plays a few rounds without Jaskier, winning effortlessly every time while the bard is making new acquaintances by the wine vault where there are multiple tables with all the best blends of reds and whites.

Geralt can't see him but he can hear him, Jaskier's voice soft and beautiful as he tells a group of young women stories about Skellige. They all gasp almost in unison when the bard tells them about that one time when they've been travelling between the islands on a boat and nearly drowned when a pack of sirens toppled it over.

Geralt chuckles to himself, knowing perfect that they were never in any real danger for it was near the coast of And Skellig and if anything happened, fishermen or sailors would've picked them up almost immediately.

Jaskier refers to him as "my husband", not giving away any names, including his own, and every time the witcher hears that, a little piece of his heart seems to melt. It's been more than five years since they've gotten married but in a way, Geralt is still not used to it.

When the time is moving towards late evening, Jaskier joins him at the table, nodding a greeting to Geralt's opponent and leaning down to brush his lips over the witcher's cheek.

"Winning, my love?" he asks, blushing just a little when Geralt pulls him into his lap.

"As usual," he grins, to great displeasure to the man across the table.

Jaskier murmurs something content, throwing his arms around Geralt's neck and sneaking a look at his cards. Geralt tries to hide them from him but the bard scratches his shoulder through the doublet and that's all it really takes for the witcher to give up and let him see.

Geralt's a long-time player and his deck is pretty much as good as it gets, nearly every gold card there is being in his possession but it's the final round and Geralt's opponent's got four cards in hand while as the wither only ahs three. By now it mostly depends on luck. But Jaskier might just know a way to get it onto their side.

"Win this round for me," he murmurs into Geralt's ear, quiet enough only for him to hear. "And I'll think about what you said back in the bedroom."

Geralt's golden eyes light up with a flame that Jaskier knows well enough to know that his words have been effective.

It all goes very fast from there. Though Geralt's only got one gold card in hand, it's a Cirilla card which has the power of fifteen and that is what ends up getting him the win, when the man across the table, with his overall score of sixteen, throws a water card onto the table, making both of Geralt's archers drop from four to one.

He wins by just one point, but he wins.

Jaskier can feel his heart flutter with anticipation as Geralt grins at his opponent, reaching over the table to get the coin they've put up. It's a rather impressive amount. The other player must be a count or something like that.

He's clearly not too happy about losing his gold but he takes it as a good player, standing up and shaking Geralt's hand with a congratulation. Then, he wishes them both a pleasant evening and leaves, waving to someone by the fountain.

"I won," Geralt states, still grinning and oh so pleased with himself. "What was it that you said, bard? If I win, what is it that you're going to think about?"

Jaskier laughs and pulls him into an affectionate kiss, one hand coming up to cup the sharp of the witcher's jaw.

"You just wait until we're back in the bedroom, my dearest."

-

It's closer to midnight when they finally find Regis.

Or, rather, when Regis finds them.

"Fascinating how people always seem to want to disguise themselves," he says instead of a greeting, appearing out of nowhere, just like he always does. "And how they seem more attracted to each other when they don't know who is hiding behind the mask."

He's got a full-black velvet suit on, adorned with raven feathers, and a matching mask that hides most of his face. If it wasn't for his voice, Jaskier would've never recognised him.

"Mystery is always thrilling," the bard smiles, taking a sip of his Est-Est. "There's something irresistibly captivating about a man in a mask. A woman, too, of course, but women are mysterious creatures in general."

Regis nods knowingly and also raises his wineglass.

"Yes, women are... A mystery no man will ever solve."

They all fall silent for a couple of moments, and even though Jaskier knows that Geralt is thinking about Yennefer, there is no more pain. There hasn't been, for years now.

It took them a long time to figure it all out, to talk everything over, and though it would come with tears what seemed like every time, eventually, it was all over. And it brought them so close that if Jaskier had to go through all of that again twice, he would.

"Well, my dearest friends," Regis finally says, breaking the silence. "I've heard that there are prize-winning games starting at midnight, would you care to join me in testing my luck?"

-

Regis turns out to be a rather talented fisherman.

That is, given that what he's fishing for is a gold ring with a bright-red ruby in the centre - one of the three main possible prizes in the game.

The other players look at him with both jealousy and fascination, loud applause echoing through the garden.

Regis looks very pleased with himself - as much as Jaskier can tell, keeping the mask in mind - but it's only when they leave the deck of the pond that he asks for Jaskier's hand and places the ring into his palm.

"Beautiful work," he says, closing Jaskier's hand around the ring before he has the chance to refuse. "But it just so happens that gold suits you better, my friend."

"Regis-" Jaskier breathes out. "I cannot accept this. You've won it, it's yours."

Regis smiles - one of those tight-lipped smiles of his that doesn't show his teeth.

"I'm afraid I must insist," he says. "If it puts your mind at ease, I don't wear jewellery at all. It gets in the way of making my medications."

"Of making your moonshine, you meant to say," Geralt chuckles teasingly.

"The most effective out of all of my elixirs, my friend."

Jaskier knows said elixir a little too well and shakes his head with a fond smile, opening his hand to examine the ring closer.

"Thank you, Regis," he smiles. "I shall treasure this gift forever."

-

Geralt refrains from any other games, saying that he's very happy with his winnings from Gwent and doesn't want to push his luck any further.

Jaskier, however, overhears that there is a bardic competition about to start and he nearly runs, having grabbed Geralt by the hand. They get there just in time for him to take one on the last remaining places.

All of the participants are given their preferred instruments and are told to improvise for three and a half minutes. Whoever comes up with the best song and gets the loudest applause, shall win five long ribbons of the finest Toussaint silk that the winner can then take to a seamstress and get their clothes adorned. Jaskier's eyes shine like the stars above when he sees the royal-blue ribbon.

Geralt and Regis take their places in the audience, the witcher secretly worried, and try their absolute best at hyping Jaskier up by rolling their eyes at the other participant's songs to indicate just how non-impressive all of those attempts are.

Jaskier smiles at them from behind his mask and giggles when Regis implies that he's so bored by one of the songs that he's about to turn into smoke and disappear.

When it comes to Jaskier's turn, the bard adjusts the collar of his doublet and the cuffs of his sleeves, stands up because he hates to perform sitting down, runs his fingers over the lute strings and takes his first note, practised and beautiful, as always.

He sings about two people meeting at a masquerade and falling on love with each other immediately. Sings about them kissing in the dark alleyways of the garden and promising each other the stars. And sings about them not recognising each other when they cross paths the next morning while also searching for one another. They part, having nearly touched hands at the gates, to always look for each other, aching with love, but never meet again.

By the time Jaskier touches the strings one last time, half the audience is wiping at their eyes, including Regis.

It's an immediate win and Jaskier shines with it when the judge hands him his silk ribbons and compliments both his singing and his lyrics.

"Such a beautiful story," Regis says when Jaskier joins them. "Tragic romance is never going to get old."

Geralt can almost smell Jaskier's blush.

"Thank you, my dearest," he smiles, only a little coy. "I'm going to make sure to write more pieces like this."

-

When they part, it's nearly dawn.

Most of the games and shows are over, the tables with food and wine nearly empty, and all the guests start slowly making their way home.

Jaskier isn't necessarily tired but he's grateful to all the gods he knows that there is no need to ride back to Corvo Bianco.

When they're saying their goodbyes, Geralt invites Regis to come visit them for a day or two - or even a week, he says - and Regis, in turn, suggest they come visit him at his crypt. Jaskier realises that they've knows each other for so long now that it doesn't even sound strange to him.

Nearly all the guests are already gone when they get back to their room.

"Remind me to send a note to the dutchess to express our gratitude for being so considerate," Jaskier says, shrugging off his doublet and rolling his sore shoulders.

Geralt just hums, non-commital.

"That song you've played," he says, letting his hair down which is a gorgeous sight to see. "Had it really been an improvised one?"

Jaskier blushes under the gaze of his golden eyes, untying the laces of his mask. Geralt's always read him like an open book.

"No," he admits, averting his eyes when the witcher comes closer. "I've composed it a few weeks ago, when we've just gotten the invitations."

"Hmm," Geralt hums again, his half-grin making Jaskier's heart stutter for what seems like the millionth time. "Thought of me?"

The bard blushes even further, grateful the dim light of the fireplace is making it less apparent.

"Always think of you," he says, leaning into the touch when Geralt hugs him from the back and noses at his neck.

Geralt breathes a pleased noise against his neck, low and rumbling, knowing a little too well just how much of a weakness it is for the bard.

"Of course you do," he murmurs, undoing the buttons of Jaskier's shirt one by one without looking and leaving long hot kisses on his neck.

Jaskier lets out a shaky breath, throwing his head onto Geralt's shoulder and just forgetting about everything else for a few long moments before the witcher slips the shirt from his own shoulders to take it off, and he has to put the silk ribbons he's still holding down. They're all incredibly beautiful, they really are but as he sets them down onto a small round table, it's a pale-lilac one that catches his eye.

"What are you going to do with them?" Geralt enquires, letting the fabric of Jaskier's shirt fall to their feet and trailing his kisses down, onto his shoulders. "Order a new doublet from the court seamstress? Or change up one of those that you already have?"

Jaskier picks the lilac ribbon up, unties the bow that's keeping it folded, wraps it around his wrist once, twice, and pulls to see how it feels. The silk is pleasantly cool against his skin.

He bites his lips and turns around in Geralt's arms to lock eyes with him and run his hand through his hair.

"I might have a better idea."

[bronanlynch]

(bi)weekly media update

apparently I just. do these every two weeks now huh. sorry to the tuesday again no problem extended universe crew for being unable to keep to a consistent schedule

listening: Curses by The Crane Wives, a band that I just started listening to but I like their sound, nice and fun and folksy, lots of songs with ominous lyrics that are good on fanmixes

honorary mention to the new Lil Nas X song because we are all love the new Lil Nas X song, it’s a bop, it’s been stuck in my head on and off ever since I heard it, and I am not immune to sexily blasphemous music videos

reading: finished Smoke & Ashes, the most recent book in the Kate Kane series that I talked about last week, and I enjoyed it a lot but there sure is a cliffhanger and afaik no set release date for the next one. it’s pretty angsty but does have lots of nice moments of hope, and some discussion about recovering from both depression and alcoholism that I appreciated.

also read more romance novels, and I appreciate that Cat Sebastian, like KJ Charles, knows how to write about rich characters while making it incredibly clear that hoarding wealth is morally indefensible. it’s like the “wow, cool robot” thing where I want to be told that I’m right for disliking capitalism/imperialism/the military industrial complex, but also I do very much want you to show me the cool robot (hot rich prettyboy in nice clothes)

also finally started Harrow the Ninth today, so I’m sure I’ll have more to say about that next time

watching: speaking of “wow, cool robot,” watched a little bit more Turn A Gundam, which sure does have some cool robots. also some gender. the main character crossdresses to like, hide their identity for fun complicated spy reasons and it’s not treated as a joke or anything? it’s just a thing that they do? and no one comments on it beyond when they were like “hey you have to wear a dress to this event because the people from the moon think our mech pilot is a woman and they can’t know it’s actually you because they still think you’re working for them”

absolutely hate that the guy on the right is just wearing a normal boring suit though like. c’mon man

Zan and I have been watching The Falcon and the Winter Soldier aka the sambucky show each week and my review so far is. well it’s about what I expected. the first episode was incredibly slow and kinda disappointing (Sam and Bucky never interact! the fact that Bucky might maybe miss Steve is never brought up, not even by his therapist, who tbh gives me incredibly bad vibes! if my best friend and the only person I knew from my past fucked off and left me alone to deal with my trauma in favor of ruining the life of a woman who’d moved on from him, I’d be pissed!) (for the sake of not being angry all the time I pretend Steve died instead of did That).

the second episode was more fun, more happens, there’s some incredibly heavy-handed corporate queerbaiting mixed in with some actually nice emotional moments (this article and this thread by the same person have a pretty good summary of All That). the handling of race, uh, could be better tbh. I appreciate what they’re going for, and to be fair the whole show isn’t out yet so it could get better (since some of the problems are tied to, y’know, the overall political problems, i.e. the fact that the villains are a group of people, led by a Black woman, who hate borders and illegally deliver medication to refugees which is somehow a bad thing, I kind of doubt it). but there is something about the way they’re making a Black man the mouthpiece of American imperialism, and the way that the new (white) Captain America who takes the shield when Sam doesn’t want it has a Black girlfriend and a Black best friend who, so far, have mostly just given him motivational pep talks, that doesn’t really inspire confidence. (this article and thread are a good overview of that aspect of the show)

also, I think it’s very funny when people are like “well you can’t say anything about the show yet, only two episodes are out” like. first of all lads it’s a six episode show, a third of the content is a decent chunk to use to form an analytical opinion, and second of all, if something strikes you as Not Great, you’re allowed to feel that way and say that, you don’t have to wait to see if there might be some twist or context that makes the thing you didn’t care for great and fine, actually,

that being said,

(when we watched the first episode, the immediate next thing we did was watch Winter Soldier and I was pleasantly surprised how well it holds up. not perfect obvi but still a solid movie, and the music does fuck)

also watched this very neat little video essay on Victoriana costuming and like, why so much media is set in the Victorian era, and started the c-drama Word of Honor which I’m sure will either be in a future post or just. something I start blogging about normally

playing: the weekend before last was the Beam Saber season finale, which I’ve already posted about quite a bit because it was fun and I love to play games with my friends. played a very fun game of Things, Eldritch and Terrifying by S. Gates this past weekend. it’s a very fun game, with very easy-to-follow rules and lots of helpful adjectives and scene starters, and also just conceptual it slaps (one person is an eldritch terror, the other person is the human that they’re courting. there’s a variant where you play as a vampire. it slaps). we made it uh, more of a rom-com than a horror story but I had a very good time, we told a very cute love story, and we’re gonna try again to make it more horror-y next time.

also I finally started Brigmore Witches and it’s very good and fun. my one complaint is that I want the Whalers to have names, because I enjoy the bit at the beginning where you can eavesdrop on them and some of them are concerned for you and some of them are fucked up about the Overseers invading their home and some of them want to fucking betray you. also, I didn’t realize that the very beginning when you fight Corvo is a dream sequence so I spent the whole fight being like “wait why does he get a gun and I don’t, where are my powers, wait aren’t I supposed to lose this fight for Plot Reasons why is he dead.” also, fucking love the favor that lets you dress up as an Overseer to get into the prison. I do love a good disguise mission

making: citrus chicken (from a cookbook so no link), plus some citrus-y root vegetables. very good if you like orange.

writing: nothing I can share yet for ~zine reasons. yes I have several fandom event weeks coming up that I want to participate in, no I haven’t written anything for any of them yet

[sorrelchestnut]

Light a Candle 3/3 (Dishonored, gen)

Fandom: Dishonored (Video Games) Relationships: Corvo Attano & Billie Lurk Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, post-DH2, post-The Peeress and the Price, Tired Corvo Attano, i love that that's a tag, Royal Spymaster Corvo Attano, Danger Twins Powers Activate, Emily and Daud have style but Corvo and Billie are EFFICIENT, yes this does involve some Return of Daud canon, self-care is taking the good bits and leaving the rest for the rats, Guilt and Regret, Complicated Family Feels Word Count: 7,218 (this part) 18,322 (fic)

Summary:  It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.

Two months into her search for the closest thing she has to family, Billie finds assistance from a most unexpected quarter. The Royal Protector has business of his own with Daud, and he's willing to work with Jessamine's killer in order to see it settled. Two formerly-sorcerous assassins, a dozen of the best fighters Karnaca's underground can offer, and one target: the Knife of Dunwall, the man who changed both their lives forever.

One thing's for sure: it's going to be a night to remember.

Link to AO3.

[zahra-kha]

Dear Diary 9

[The sound of running water ceases in the otherwise quiet apartment. Behind the red curtain fabric rustles and a soft sigh of relief can be heard. Bare feet pad against wood flooring and then the curtain is pulled back, revealing Zahra in little more than silver thin silk shorts and a towel draped lazily around her neck. Her short hair is still damp, small water droplets trickling down occasionally onto the crimson fabric that was giving her some semblance of modesty.

In the low light of her little abode, her sharp gaze shifted over toward her living space. In particular the glittering clusters sitting in the corner of her seating area. With another sigh she raked her hand through her damp tresses, steps feather light as she quickly closed the distance and flopped down onto the floor. Her dairy laid before her and she reached out, but not before flexing her fingers with a little wince. Inspecting her hand, the blisters now stood out clear as day along her palm now that the dirt and grime had been washed away. She leaned back and reached over for the book and a sharpened piece of charcoal.]

It’s been a long time since I’ve been mining. It took an entire week but I finally finished the last bit of it all.

When I was younger, I’d go out with my dad to the mines. The Kouris family have been miners for generations, but it’s a bit complicated. They originally came from Corvos and bought land and a noble title...somewhere along the way they lost the title and most of the land. When dad started taking over, that changed. He regained the title and all the land. He’s made the house what it is today, and while I never really wanted to be a miner, and I wasn’t good at appraising, he taught me a lot - the little bit I wanted to learn. He also expanded the business, so we have several jewelry stores now.

I’m so rusty - but I feel some gifts are more meaningful when you have a hand in them. I may have gotten carried away, I dug around for something for Tamala too. I was even able to get something for the team captains, Tala and Vin.

These stones need appraising, I have to take them to the goldsmith, but I know what I want. A tourmaline pendant for Jasper - tourmaline is a grounding stone. It’s also good for relieving stress, and I feel he needs that haha. Rose quartz for Tamala, it’s a stone of peace and healing - and it symbolizes all forms of love and friendship. I think they’d make good earrings. Sunstone for Tala, in a bracelet - it dispels negativity, fear, and it radiates health, happiness, and good fortune. Maybe it’ll keep those weird cultists off of her. For Vin, I managed to find some fluorite. It’s good for the tech savvy, it increases self-confidence, concentration, and decreases stress. I’m going to have it shaped as a brooch.

Hey, my dad talked a lot about this stuff, okay? Plus, I was really curious. You’d be surprised, gems and minerals do more than just look pretty!

I may have also went to Kugane after the game and walked around the shops a bit. I picked up some things.

Anyway! That was so exhausting but worth it. Since arriving in Eorzea I’ve met so many amazing people and they’ve done so much for me. I can’t give back nearly as much as I’d like so at the very least I can do this.

I’ve also finished the final preparations on my outfits for the performances. Fitaan helped me, it’s been a while since he’s been able to since I’ve been in and out of the encampment.

I also went on a leve for the first time. I admit I don’t know much about leves, I’ve mostly just snagged whatever quest listings were up and ran with them. It was a weird one though, I followed some rumors about a weird leve and ended up in an area I’ve never been too. Almost got lost, trying to find it, too!

There are ruins back home, but Eorzea is weirdly...saturated. Is that a good word to use? It’s hard to explain how I see the world when no one else sees it the way I do and it’s not something I can talk about. It’s like...everything has a strange layer over it, I guess. Some people’s layer is stronger than others, and everyone’s layer is unique. Forgotten Springs was like...lots of things had a really odd filter over it. Sometimes it was eerie, sometimes it was ethereal and beautiful. I think I could have stayed there all day just looking at it.

Anyway, the group went on to investigate and we began to head towards the ruins of a place called Wanderer’s Palace. We could sense something pulling us in, but I couldn’t see anything. It was so strange.

A mist rose, a mind reading mist! I think it was confused, maybe because it was old and drawing on our memories or something. It took a mix of names from our minds - I wonder if it was pulling from me? I doubt it, it wasn’t like I could have been the only person thinking about uh- people on our team. Even if it was me, I wasn’t thinking anything bad - I was thinking about...well the mining trip.

Anyway! We managed to cross that weird hurdle and moved on! Finally we were able to get some clues and the scholars of the team nerded out. They reminded me of my mom. There’s definitely more to be discovered and I’m intrigued! I want to know what was pulling at us, and I think we’re going to a library to find more clues! Eorzea is so full of adventure and wonder. I love it!

[messmertheimpaler]

💍🤕🎁💗 for eris & thomas!!

thank you for my life!!!!

ERIS

💍 Does your OC have a specific item that is priceless to them but may (or may not) be completely worthless to someone else? Is there a story behind this item or is it just because they like it so much?

A corrupted bone charm her mother gave to her hfjklfjf she’s never shown it to anyone for the big fear of being turned in to the overseers for heresy. Teague does know about it but he doesn’t care too much for it. Her mother gave it to her before she got captured and told her to hold on to it and to think of her when she looked at it. It’s the only thing she has of her mother and even when she had no money, she refused to sell it for money.

🤕 What is the worst injury your OC has ever suffered? Do they have any scars or lasting physical reminders of it? Do they get sick often or have any lasting medical conditions?

There was one time she broke her wrist when she tried to climb the roof of her house way back then. Adrian got mad at her after like it wasn’t his fault that she was trying to get on the roof because he dared her. Eris rarely gets sick but when she does, she’s bedridden for weeks. 

🎁 What would be the perfect gift to buy your OC? What would be the worst gift? Are they themselves any good at gifting things or are they really indescisive? How do they wrap their presents?

Perfume lmao she loves smelling good or if she smells clients who smell nice she’ll cling to them for hours. The worst thing to get her would be .... nothing she loves being spoiled, she just prefers perfume more than getting clothes. I think she’s.... okay at getting presents. Like, if it’s someone’s birthday, she gets the very thing they would definitely love/appreciate, but if it’s like getting a present for no reason, she’d get them like,,, socks or s/t. Eris doesn’t like to wrap gifts, she just hands them their gift like “here you go!!! :)”

💗 Relationships? Who are their friends, their family relations, lover(s), foes? What sort of personalities really tick them off and what others do they like? Is there anything that’d ruin a friendship for them?

Her friend would be @roberthouses oc miss Lulu!! They got on well when they first met and they’re both clowns for two particular men that they both know about and make fun of each other for it,,, she’s got more regular clients than friends, they’re mostly on good terms with her. But she does have like a funny friendship with Treavor where they just give each other backhanded compliments constantly lmfao. Teague is the big clown she’s head over heels for if... u know what i mean :0) It’s awkward at first but they begin to open up to each other in more ways than one!!! okay but srsly they have their good moments and bad but they sort of suck at communicating but they always find their way back to each other :^) her other “lover” would be Corvo but that’s an au where things Work Out you feel me? Eris has her older brother Adrian who’s a whaler and doesn’t know that he’s alive in dumbwall... then there’s Clara her younger sister who she takes care of and the big reason she turned to working at the GC. The type of personalities that she doesn’t mesh well with are people like Treavor but she likes him in her own way, other than that, she hates snobby people.

THOMAS

💍 Does your OC have a specific item that is priceless to them but may (or may not) be completely worthless to someone else? Is there a story behind this item or is it just because they like it so much?

Just his old wedding ring which he hasn’t thrown away. He meant to throw it out but then forgot and then found it at some point after waking up. He can’t bring himself to throw it away though.

🤕 What is the worst injury your OC has ever suffered? Do they have any scars or lasting physical reminders of it? Do they get sick often or have any lasting medical conditions?

He has a few scars on his chest and back from a primal behemoth. One almost killed him and it left him in bed for two weeks plus a lecture from ADA. He does have an aversion to plasma and hates it now.

🎁 What would be the perfect gift to buy your OC? What would be the worst gift? Are they themselves any good at gifting things or are they really indescisive? How do they wrap their presents?

Purpleberry bunches, babey!! He lives for that!!! He’s got a big sweet tooth, so anything like that and he’ll love it, especially when he’s mad/annoyed, he’ll happily accept it. Anything robot related, he’ll hate it. He’s slightly afraid of SAM, that’s how bad it is. He’s pretty good at giving gifts. Everyone on the ship goes to him any time they have a hard time thinking of gifts for everyone else. It’s a little tradition they all have of handing out gifts to each other. But then it turns into a thing that it’s pretty much Thomas giving presents which is what he wanted all along heuheuehuehe He takes gift wrapping very seriously and will take a day off to wrap presents.

💗 Relationships? Who are their friends, their family relations, lover(s), foes? What sort of personalities really tick them off and what others do they like? Is there anything that’d ruin a friendship for them?

His friends are all the people on the Unreliable, but he considers Parvati and Felix his closest friends, but he loves going out with Nyoka the most when he wants a day to relax. He didn’t like Max in the beginning but he’s grown to like him and likes to hang out with him on the ship just to talk about whatever Max wants. He’s got an on/off thing with Ellie that they both like and don’t take too seriously. Then obvi there’s the complicated thing he’s got with ADA that everyone on the ship knows about and thankfully no one judges him for it. Ellie understands it even more so when they start their not-relationship and never comments on it. Thomas hates people who talk to him like he’s a child like he doesn’t have a medical degree. As for anything that would ruin a friendship for him, there’s not much that would, Thomas is very easy going and accepts a lot of things from people.