#Cookie Comedy Short Story

[vudder]

After Megatron realized there were no frosted sugar cookies hidden inside of Jazz, he gave in to his urge to harm women and led a century long war against them. He's now remembered as the most dangerous incel to ever live.

The End.

[kingofbodyrolls]

BTS fic recs: December 2023

HAPPY NEW YEARS!! 🥳 May every single one of you lovely people out there have the best and brightest year to come ✨

I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹

❗Most of these fics are smutty as hell, so minors dni.❗ 

If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the original fic’s post 💜And if you want more fic recs you can follow me to stay updated 🙂

BTS fic rec index → May | Jun | Jul | Aug | Sep (jjk)(knj) | Oct (pjm) | Nov (*) | 💜 (ksj)(kth) |

Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻, personal favorites = 💯.

Namjoon

⭐Good Neighbor @sugaurora [0.7K] // knj x f.reader // neighbors!au, winter!au // 🥰🥰🥰

📝 Namjoon’s solitary tendencies versus the cookies. Spoiler: The cookies win.

🗨️ God, this was so fucking sweet 🥹 like sugary sweet fluffy fantastic! I loved it 💖 the way Namjoon just observes oc, and then helping her in the end 👏🏾 even though this is short, it’s fucking brilliant. The writing is just 😘😘 like I wished there was so much more, but I’m also so pleased with just what is 😌

⭐A Word from our Sponsors 💯 @ugh-yoongi [17.5K] // knj x f.reader // podcast!au, f2l, idiots to lovers  // 😂🥵🥰

📝 You’ve co-hosted a podcast with namjoon for three years; have known him even longer. the two of you have always been the picture of platonic, but that hasn’t stopped the internet from doing what the internet does. the shipping? a little weird at first, but you can understand it: two attractive twenty-somethings always in close proximity to one another, obvious (platonic!) chemistry—people have created ships for less. the fanfiction, though? also pretty funny… until you can’t stop thinking about it. 

🗨️ Okay. This. Was. Exceptional ✨🥹 I am slightly speechless, so this review might be short or long or just a rambling of my dainty thoughts. Here goes: it was amazing, seriously one of the best fics I’ve ever read 😭 everything just had that perfect flow, the writing was incredible, like I can’t even speak? The characters, out of this world fantastic ✨ the whole thing, just, perfect. Perfection. I don’t know what else to call it, sorry. The world building and tension was so fucking delicious I just ate it up! 😭 And their banter and chemistry was just off the charts amazing. Perfection. And it was so fucking hilarious too!! Many times I was just laughing or chuckling, like the lovesick fool I am 😂 it was definitely worth it to stay up late tonight to finish this masterpiece ✨ And them reading the fanfiction 💀 😂 priceless ✨👏🏾

Seokjin

⭐The IKEA Test by @yoon-bug [9.1K] // ksj x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵🥰😂

📝 One review on IKEA’s website called the BRIMNES bed frame the leading cause of divorce due to its difficult assembly. You and Seokjin had laughed when you read it. Now, you weren’t so sure.

🗨️ Their banter and all the sexual innuendos are damn hilarious! I thoroughly enjoyed this very much 💜 

⭐I Don’t Think I’m Okay by @ressjeon [4K] // ksj x f.reader // slice of life, idiots to lovers!au, childhood friends!au // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 With many chances wasted, you couldn’t even resist anymore.

🗨️ A cute little Seokjin fic 🥰

⭐Turn Back Time 💯 by @raplinesmoon [13.3K] // ksj x f.reader // time travel!au // 🥵🥰🌩️😂

📝 After total humiliation at his middle school baseball try outs, Kim Seokjin wants nothing more than for his awkward years to fade away until he’s thirty. Cue a magic baseball glove, and his wish is finally granted. Seokjin suddenly wakes up seventeen years later, now the star pitcher of the team he’d always dreamed of playing for. Confused and overwhelmed at the prospect of the new life waiting for him, he turns to the only person who seems to understand him — you. Will Seokjin learn what it truly means to be thirty, flirty, and thriving? Or will he find himself wishing he could turn back time?

🗨️ Seokjin’s childhood/school was just, ugh, I really felt heartache for thirteen year old Seokjin 🥹 So very common as a kid, to wish you’re older – and then it’s just not what he expected at all. I really loved it! There were a few times I was laughing so damn hard, times where I was shedding a few tears as well. Just, incredibly good; very well written, the story was captivating and motivating, just yeah, brilliant. (Sorry, I’m suddenly bad with words). I loved the ‘lessons’ he learned, and then having the luxury (I’m using that word because we don’t have that irl) of going back to his childhood (almost like starting over) and damn it was good 👏💯

Yoongi

⭐Sinful Lust [series; ongoing] 💯 by @oddinary4bts [wordcount loading…] // myg x jjk x f.reader // established relationship, bisexual boyfriend!Yoongi, slice of life // 🥵🌩️

📝In an attempt to spice up your bedroom life with your boyfriend Min Yoongi, you suggest bringing another man into the action. Yoongi seems reluctant at first, but when you mention his friend Jeon Jungkook, he can’t deny his attraction. All that’s left to do is to convince Jungkook into participating…

🗨️  Holy 😱 😱 😱 this is just completely unadulterated sin 🥵🫣 I can not describe how much I love this fic! It has A LOT of angst and at times it’s just sad reading how each character falls apart 😭 it’s amazing! If you’re into stories that will have you question your own morals and who to root for, this is for you 💖

⭐In Between the Pages of You [series; ongoing] @unique-high [wordcount loading…] // myg x f.reader // s2l // 🥰😂🌩️

📝 Yoongi fell in love with you. A girl he had never even met before. Knew everything that you were made up of within 96 pages of a worn red journal with a nirvana sticker on front, with coffee and tea-stained pages that also smelled of lilacs and summer. 

🗨️ I can already tell that this story will be amazing; it’s so sweet, cute and tender. The storyline/idea is really cute and fluffy, like who wouldn’t love that?? 😭 And as someone who wrote countless journals as a teen, this one just hits differently. It’s so cute and the concept is gold 💜 I really, really look forward to reading the next chapters and what Yoongi will uncover of OC through her journal. And if he can return it to her sometime and they meet! 🥹

⭐F*ck Christmas 💯 @sailoryooons [23.4K] // myg x f.reader // f2l // 🥰🥵

📝 Making hating Christmas your entire personality was never the plan. Then again, it seems bad things only ever happen around Christmas - like discovering your fiancé cheating on you, forcing you to move back to your sleepy hometown. But Min Yoongi happens to love Christmas, and if there is one thing your very stubborn childhood crush is going to do, it’s try to reignite your Christmas spirit. Even if he has to force-feed it to you with gingerbread cookies and too-sweet eggnog. 

🗨️ Gosh, I remember reading this sometime last year and it was perfection - it still is! ✨ It’s so so so fucking good. If you haven’t read it, please do so 🥹 it’s also one of the best Christmasy fics 💜

Hoseok

⭐Ho Ho Horrible 💯 @ugh-yoongi [5.6K] // jhs x f.reader // e2l, neighbor!au, holiday!au // 🥵🥰😂

📝 (or, the one where your neighbor is a relentless christmas caroler and refuses to take a hint, but at least he's really hot.)

🗨️ No– this was just so freaking cute! 😭 Like fluffy cute and also extremely funny, just what I love. I loved this so much 💜 OC’s friendship with Tae, their banter was 💯 and then with Hobi, just so so good! It was so cute and OC’s internal dialogue is just funny 😂A really cute holiday themed Hoseok fic that I can’t recommend enough!!!! Everything was just great. Had me smiling and giggling a few times – please go read it 🥹💜

⭐Started with a Sparkle, now we’re on Fire @the-boy-meets-evil [6.5K] // jhs x f.reader // f2l // 🥵

📝 You're feeling self conscious about your recent break-up and hoseok is more than happy to teach you a thing or two.

🗨️ Really really good! I really liked it 💜 I really loved how both sweet and demanding Hoseok was, guiding oc through everything.

Jimin

⭐Couchsurfer 💯 @heartbeatan [6K] // pjm x f.reader // s2l // 🥵🥰

📝 This was left intentionally blank 🫥

🗨️ Omg this was so fucking good! 💯 First, really well written and the pacing was lovely, even though it’s short and one night they spend together 🥹 the build up of their tension and their chemistry was off the charts! So impeccably done! Fuck. I loved it ✨ it’s insane how good this story is and Jimin is just so sweet, romantic and nasty 🥵 I can’t tell you how turned on I got by the description of how Jimin handled OC, like damn 🥵 this is so fucking good, please don’t sleep on the this beauty 💖 Normally, I’m not one for one night stands, because I catch feelings for the characters, but this has a lovely ending that I loved - so fucking good!

Lol. Can not stop screaming about this one. Please go read it, fuck. PLEASE 😌 ✨

⭐Paper Hearts @namfinessed [9K] // pjm x f.reader // f2l, college!au // 🥰

📝 hearts fragile like paper, tear it or don’t?

🗨️ I think it is both cute and heartwarming, with their foolishness and stubbornness towards each other. I loved how the fic becomes full circle with the description of love by both Jimin and reader and then again at the end - really, really beautiful! 😍 I really loved this, it was well written, their friendship and love really shined through too! If you haven’t read this one yet, you really should 💜

Taehyung

⭐The Wannabe-Photographer Chronicles [series] by @gimmethatagustd [14K] // kth x f.reader // frenemies to lovers // 🥵

📝 You’re so tired of Kim Taehyung’s hipster, wannabe-photographer ass. You’re so tired of Kim Taehyung’s stupid smile and stupid jokes and stupid way of getting under your skin and sticking in your brain.

🗨️ At first I did not realize that this was a series, therefore I’ve linked to the masterlist, lol. Anyway, this series is just so fucking hot, like WHAT 🥵 There’s a lot of banter and their mutual ‘hatred’ for each other just makes this hit incredible hard. Really amazing ✨

⭐Loverboy 💯 by @kookslastbutton [7.1K] // kth x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 After a startling conversation with your coworkers, you start feeling insecure about your sexual prowess. You don't initiate as much, you haven't worn lingerie yet, and you're still timid about doing much seducing with your body–are you giving your boyfriend boring sex? Taehyung reassures you that you are perfect and have nothing to worry about.

🗨️ These coworkers gotta go, okay?! 😠🤣 Planting seeds of doubt in OC’s head, no, no. Tae to the rescue!! He is so sweet in this too, yes a real ‘loverboy’ 😍 Gosh and then best friend Jimin - that was just pure gold, their relationship and how he helps OC 🥹 That is friendship goals!! A sweet, loving and comforting Taehyung fic - I loved it ✨

⭐Hush, yeah? [series; ongoing/hiatus] by @kithtaehyung [wordcount loading…] // kth x f.reader // brother’s best friend!au, music festival!au // 🥵

📝 Who knew an innocent accident could turn things so dirty..

🗨️ Pure gold ✨ — I don’t really have much to say, except GO READ IT.

⭐Under wraps by @jungkxook [15K] // kth x f.reader // e2l, fake dating // 🥵🥰

📝 There’s nothing you and taehyung seem to hate more than each other - except for christmas. having recently been dumped by your (now ex) boyfriend only seems to make this holiday even worse. but when taehyung suggests that you should pretend to be dating each other to save you both the embarrassment, pity, and bothersome questions from family and friends alike for a fun carefree month of celebrations, you can’t possibly say no.

🗨️ I just love me some good enemies to lovers AU 🥵 the relationship between OC and tae is really good, I think the tension between them was well built 👏🏾 I loved how their relationship unfolded and grew through their fake dating 🥹 the way OC realized she had feelings for him, but he had showed her before in his subtle moves, how much more he relaxed in her presence. I loved the interaction between oc and tae’s parents too, the way that they could obviously tell that OC was head over heels 😂 ah just, It was really really good! It was funny, it was comforting, and such a lovely read around Christmas! And the smut was sweet and tender (also hot!) 😍 a really great fic that I’ll add to my Christmas re-reads for years to come ✨ I loved it! Please go read it if you haven’t already 🥹

⭐Somebody Else 💯 by @jamaisjoons [4.2K] // kth x f.reader ft. yoongi // established relationship + post break up!au // 🥵🌩️

📝 Yoongi doesn’t want you anymore. but he can’t stand watching you with someone else. 

🗨️ Holy s– 🥵 I don’t even know where to begin with this one! It’s really good and the that is mainly from Yoongi’s pov makes it truly special – he is observing them and damn is it hot 🥵 Aish, really good 💯

Jungkook

Nothing this month 😞 — I AM SO SORRY that I haven’t read any with JK this month (though he is featuring in some with the other members). My JK ‘to read’ list is the LONGEST imao 😂 I’ll hopefully do better next month – but you can always check my Jungkook Library 💜

I have spend most of December being on holiday/time off, which gave me a lot of time to write my own stuff, which in the end gave me less time to read 😣 But it’s all good! I loved getting some stories and thoughts out of my head and now there’s space to read and obsess over other’s stories again 😀

Borahae 💜

[gingergofastboatsmojito]

The Pacino Variant

Since I found out that JAW got inspiration from Al Pacino to play some of Carmy's layers I immediately started thinking about Frankie and Johnny's dynamic and how it was all so messy in their relationship before it got to the good part. Granted, JAW was not inspired by Johnny, but by a different role Al Pacino played, but still. It got me thinking about how this very Austenian love story, of course, very realistic and bittersweet had certain points in common with Sydcarmy and once I started I just couldn't stop drawing parallels between the sydcarmy dynamic and the frankjohnny one because F&J was a very atypical comedy, just like The Bear and that's why many viewers now don't even understand how The Bear is a comedy, which it is, of course: A noir one. Back then, something similar kinda happened with Frankie & Johnny, it flopped as a rom-com but it became a cult movie and was critically acclaimed.

Here's a clip:

Context: they met while working together at a diner.

The main characters were described as: "lonely little people struggling to find love."

Rolling Stone's review back then read the following:

"Somehow Mr. Marshall, Mr. McNally, and their superb leading actors are able to retain the intimacy of their material. They also retain the story's fundamental wariness about romance, even when everything about Ms. Pfeiffer and Mr. Pacino has the audience wondering why they don't simply fall into each other's arms."

See? Sounds very Sydcarmy to me, building intimacy while NOT dating, Frankie (Michelle Pfeiffer) is all business-no love, a tough cookie, she's been burnt before so she doesn't let any new guy into her life

and Johnny has to do the hard work to convince her (which Carm is not doing bc he rather denies his own feelings and deflects onto Claire as both this amazing meta by @Chefkids and my own humble opinion point out). In Johnny's case, there's no Claire but there is a rather complicated past that also conditions his choices and Frankie doesn't make it any easier on him, etc.

So my point is that the whole Sydcarmy back and forth before it actually happens, which I already mentioned here I think is gonna be more of a cliffhanger kinda thing bc before we get to that part they need to be at each other's throats, Carmy's relationship with C has to crash and burn, The Bear needs to win a bunch of awards and hopefully get out of debt, which will be S3's main focus, along with Nat's baby that's gonna be a total game changer in terms of the Berzatto family's dynamic, etc... when all of those boxes are checked ✅✅✅ then we will venture into Sydcarmy territory on Storer's terms. And I can't help but wonder if that transition from friends to lovers is gonna be kinda like F&J's, I think it might, because it sounds Storer-friendly. I'm not talking about the endgame per se, just the transition.

Would love to know what you all think about this theory.

If you haven't seen the movie and now feel curious about it, here's a playlist, and those short clips pretty much sum it all up.

❤️‍🔥

[saichisugimoto99]

Halloween Holiday

Pairing/s: Ethan Landry x OC!Miyuki

Summary: When Chad said he had won an all-inclusive trip to Japan for 8 people, most people thought this "little vacation" was a good opportunity to clear their heads. The place was beautiful, although that was exactly the problem. How could Chad win a luxury trip in a raffle of dubious origin? Shortly after, they discovered that, despite being a charming place, it had a very dark secret.

Warnings: Language, shoddy comedy, gore? (just a description, I think), bad writing, sorry, non-ghostface. I think that's all, if I'm missing something, don't hesitate to tell me.

W/C (Word Count): 5,631

A/N (Author's Note): For the story of this special (which comes a little late, sorry), I based it on two movies and a video game: The Grudge (its American version), and the game that was created by Chilla's Art: The Bathhouse. English is not my first language, so if there are mistakes, don't crucify me. (Only Nexorath dialogues will be purple)

Everything was completely fine. Miyuki just wanted to spend the next few days making Halloween-themed cookies together with her spoon cleaner, Ethan. If only Chad hadn't won that damn trip to Japan, they wouldn't be in this situation. But for more context, let's go back in time.

Two weeks before…

Miyuki was preparing the cookie dough while Ethan hugged her from behind, his face hidden in the crook of her neck. “Love, I need space to handle the dough” he said to the curly-haired boy. “I'm sorry... I barely saw you all week because of exams, I can't help but want to be close to you” Ethan responded with a sad expression. Miyuki just smiled and rolled her eyes. “Okay, stop making that puppy dog ​​expression and help me make the cookies” Ethan smiled and started helping his girlfriend with the preparation, just like she had taught him a while ago.

After a few minutes, Miyuki put the tray with the cookie dough in the oven and took out the sugar and cinnamon to sprinkle on them within 10 minutes. At that, the head of his symbiote, Nexorath, emerged from behind his back. "I can't wait to eat cookies" the symbiote said with a smile, Ethan just rolled his eyes, “Are you leaving the rest with nothing again, glutton?” after saying that, the symbiote quickly turned to look at Ethan.

“Who do you think you're calling a glutton, you broccoli hair idiot?!”

“What did you call me a parasite?!”

"Parasite?! I’ll headbutt you!!”

“Enough!!” Miyuki exclaimed irritably. “My God, you look like an old couple. They won't eat cookies if they keep fighting like that. Nexorath, you know you are forbidden from headbutting others, and Ethan, stop calling him a parasite” after the girl scolded them, they both bowed their heads and remained silent until the cookies were ready and sprinkled.

They were about to start eating cookies when the door to the apartment Miyuki shared with her best friend, Anika, was heard. Multiple voices could be heard and, seconds later, the aforementioned girl stuck her head out of the kitchen door with a smile. “Sorry to interrupt your quality time together, guys, but Chad needs you in the room.”

“What for?” Miyuki asked with a raised eyebrow.

“No idea, he said it was incredible news.”

Anika leaves in the direction of the living room, “The cookies will have to wait guys” Miyuki said as she took Ethan's hand and headed to the living room, “I hope it's quick, I've already waited a long time to eat cookies” Nexorath and his infinitely short patience.

Entering the room, Miyuki saw everyone: Sam, Tara, Mindy, Anika, Chad, the perpetrator of the incredible news, and even one of her brothers, Kenji. “Kenji? "What are you doing here?" the girl asked, looking at her brother while Ethan sat on the only space left on the couch and she settled into his legs. “I don't have the slightest idea, I was just coming to leave you the book you lent me. I ran into them and Chad dragged me here” Kenji said with his usual serious expression.

“So… Why the sudden reunion?” Ethan asked, looking at his best friend and roommate as he wrapped his arm around Miyuki's waist. “I'm glad you asked my dear Ethan. The news that I will give next will only demonstrate my good luck.”

“Do you have any idea what the hell he's talking about?” Miyuki asked in a whisper to Tara, who was next to her, but she just shrugged, “He didn't want to tell me.”

“Well, I hope it's really too good news to interrupt my time eating cookies” the symbiote spoke in his head, making only Miyuki hear him.

“A few weeks ago I went to Brooklyn with some kids from one of my classes and entered a raffle place. I signed up for one of them and I won. Can anyone guess what the prize was?” Chad asked, looking around at everyone.

“Speak up!” Miyuki and Mindy exclaimed at the same time.

Chad was startled, “Shit! Well, well, how impatient” he rolled his eyes and spoke again, “Well, friends, I am pleased to announce that... I won a trip to Japan!” everyone was silent for a few seconds, before they jumped and They began to congratulate Chad, except Kenji, Mindy and Miyuki. “Chad, that's incredible!” Anika exclaimed as she stood up to hug her friend. “It's true, you really have good luck” Sam told him with a smile and then Tara stood up to congratulate her boyfriend. , “I wasn't expecting that news, congratulations babe” “Congratulations, bro!” Ethan moved his girlfriend to hug Chad.

“And you guys aren't going to congratulate me?” i ask, looking at Kenji, his sister, and Miyuki.

“I still don't know what I'm doing here” Kenji said.

“Chad, dear brother, your award gives me a bad feeling.”

“I share Mindy's opinion.”

“I haven't eaten cookies for coming to hear your news, and it's rubbish!” Nexorath came out, he was very irritated.

“Oh come on! I haven't even told you the best part. The trip is for 8 people! That's why I brought Miyuki's brother.”

Miyuki and Kenji look at him for a few seconds, “You know we go there with the same frequency as we visit a supermarket, right?” Kenji said making Chad a little frustrated, “Please, guys, so that the trip is valid. There needs to be 8 people, plus it's a good opportunity for the rest of us to see a place outside of the United States, so what do you say?” Miyuki shares a look with her brother and they both nod at the same time, “Okay, we'll go.”

“I still think this is very suspicious and a bad idea, but anyway, I'm in too” Mindy said, standing up with her arms crossed. And oh, she was definitely right; This trip was a very bad idea.

Miyuki was at the door of the apartment, giving instructions to her sister, Natsuki, on how to take care of her pets while she went on a trip, “Koda and Nimbus have to go out every morning to walk for at least an hour, since They have a lot of energy. What Horus eats most are crickets and lettuce, and Jade already has enough frozen mice in the small refrigerator under her terrarium. About Zinnia, the only thing you have to keep an eye on is its litter box and its diet, technically it would be the easiest to care for. Okay?” her sister just looked at her for a few seconds, processing everything.

���Yeah… I think I should thank you for the written instructions” he said to Miyuki with a smile, the girl imitated his action, “It's necessary, you know I worry about my babies.”

“Don't worry, if you visit 'aunt Namika, give my regards.”

“Of course, see you.”

Miyuki said goodbye to her sister and her pets, and headed downstairs, where Anika was already putting both of their suitcases in the trunk of the taxi. The girl approached to help her, and when they finished placing the suitcases, they got into the vehicle heading to the airport.

When they arrived, the rest of the group was waiting for them at the entrance. They got out of the taxi and went to get their suitcases. Ethan ran to Miyuki to help her put them down.

"I missed you."

“We saw each other last night, babe” the girl responded with a teasing smile.

“Exactly” Ethan leaned in to give his girlfriend a kiss which she reciprocated.

“AGH, you guys disgust me!” the symbiote spoke telepathically, causing Miyuki to roll her eyes as she finished unloading her suitcases to walk towards the others along with Anika.

As they made their way through the airport, the bustle of people and the sound of advertisements echoed around them. Miyuki looked around, feeling a mix of irritation and nervousness because she didn't like crowded places. “I can't believe I finally got to visit where your family comes from” Ethan murmured, the girl just smiled and squeezed his hand tenderly.

“Shit!” Miyuki exclaimed, stopping short.

“What's going on? Did you forget something?” the curly-haired boy asked, causing the entire group to look at them.

“Ahh no, I hope you didn't forget anything, we don't have time for you to go back and forth” Chad said, with a worrying tone.

“No, it's not that. I just forgot to mention something to you” before he could continue speaking, you heard a voice calling out to you from behind, when you turned around, you saw Quinn and another of Miyuki's brothers, Masashi, approaching you.

“I forgot to mention them.”

“What are you doing here?” Sam asked.

“Damn, we barely missed you guys. 'I ran into Miyuki's brother on the way and we thought they had already left, I'm glad we arrived on time" Quinn said as she gasped for air, the only one who didn't even look tired was Masashi, who only had a backpack on him. shoulder and a travel bag in the other hand.

“Well yes, we were already on our way to the inspection area” Miyuki said with a smile as she hugged her friend and then her brother, “Hello, Masa”

“Hello, flea” Masashi said with a half smile as he the hug corresponded to his dear sister.

“I'll repeat Sam's question: what are you doing here?” Chad asked, raising an eyebrow. “Well, despite my negativity about this trip, I didn't want to leave Quinn alone in New York, so I called my dad to pull some strings and talk to the owner of the accommodation, and he set aside two more places: one for Quinn and another for Masashi. Because, lacking a brother, he decided to send two to take care of me. You don’t have to worry, your tickets are paid for too.”

“Tell us the truth, Miyuki, how much influence does your dad have?” Mindy asked with her arms crossed and a smile, causing Miyuki to just roll her eyes, “Let's go, before we miss the flight” with that, Everyone continued walking, and this time with two more companions.

The group arrived at the screening area and began to line up. Chad remained cheerful, making jokes about Japanese food and what they planned to do as soon as they got to Tokyo. “I have to try real ramen and see if it's really as good as they say!” he said, as Tara laughed and nodded.

“And I want to walk around Sensō-ji temple. I saw some pictures and the place is beautiful” Quinn said as she linked her arm with Sam’s.

Finally, they passed the security check and collected their suitcases. “We're almost ready to board!” Anika exclaimed, as she checked her watch.

While they were waiting in the departure lounge, Mindy approached Miyuki and said quietly, “Hey, do you think this is all a good idea? I can't stop thinking about what the news said about that place…”

“What do you mean?” Miyuki responded, a little confused.

“You know, the stories about haunted places and stuff like that. 'I don't know, I have a bad feeling."

“I don't believe much in ghosts, but my aunt Namika is an itako, which is the equivalent of shamans in Japan. For that reason, I always keep an open mind. But you're right, I don't have a good feeling either." (Says the one who has an alien up her ass and also knows Doctor Strange)

Before Mindy could respond, an advertisement caught her attention. “Attention, passengers of flight 452 to Tokyo, the last calls to board are being made. Please go to boarding gate number 7.”

“It's time!” Chad said, excited. The group got moving, with renewed energy.

Once on board the plane, they settled into their seats and, as the plane began to take off, Miyuki looked out the window.

“Japan, here we come!” Chad shouted, raising his arms in triumph. Everyone applauded and laughed, infected by his enthusiasm. However, deep down, Miyuki couldn't help a small worry from settling in her mind. What awaited you on this trip?

Throughout the trip, Miyuki was watching movies with Ethan, listening to music and occasionally talking to her brothers, or answering some of Quinn's questions about Japan. When they finally landed, the group felt refreshed. Excitement filled the air as they picked up their suitcases. As they left the airport, the fresh air and bustle of the city surrounded them.

“Look at that!” Anika exclaimed, pointing towards the illuminated signs and the hustle and bustle of the streets. “This is incredible.”

“Don't react as if it's your first time coming to Japan,” Kenji said, with an almost imperceptible smile, “She looks like an old woman seeing a modern phone for the first time,” Masashi said next, looking at his brother with a mocking smile, “ I hate you guys,” Anika punched them both, but still smiled.

“Guys, do you know what time the minibus that dad rented for us will arrive?” Miyuki asked, looking at her brothers. Masashi looked at the time on a nearby screen at the airport, “He will arrive in approximately 10 minutes.”

“Did they rent a minibus?” Chad asked, confused, “Don't look at me, Dad would never take 'no' for an answer” Miyuki says, as her siblings nodded at the same time.

The minibus arrived shortly after, they stored the suitcases in a compartment with the help of the driver and got into the vehicle that would take them to the accommodation. Upon arriving at the place, they were surprised by how luxurious it looked from the outside.

Immediately, everyone turned their heads to look at Chad, who had a huge smile. “Well? What do you think?” “Chad, this looks too good to be true” Mindy said with a serious and somewhat nervous expression. “Come on, little sister, don't be a party pooper. “Stop being so negative and just enjoy this vacation.”

“For the first time, I agree with her. I feel something strange about this place” Nexorath said, stepping out from behind Miyuki as he looked around the accommodation, making sure no one else saw it.

“Do you see it? Even the alien agrees with me,” Mindy said. “Come on, you too, Nex? “This place is amazing.”

“An incredible place to die” Miyuki commented. As beautiful as it was, it definitely had a very strange vibe.

“That's enough, let's get in at once, shall we?” Quinn took the key from Chad and quickly began walking towards the entrance of the small house they had shared.

“I don't want to go into that place” the symbiote said, looking at its host. “I'm afraid we have no choice, Nex” the girl sighed as she dragged her suitcase. “Awww, is the almighty Nexorath afraid?” Ethan asked sarcastically as he put his arm around Miyuki's shoulders. “You're lucky Miyuki doesn't let me eat your damn head!”

The place was also nice inside, with all the amenities. The house had three rooms; In one pair there were two double futons, and the last one was the main room. They quickly began to choose who would stay in each room: Miyuki, Ethan, Anika and Mindy would share one; Sam, Quinn, Kenji and Masashi would share the other; and Chad and Tara would get the master bedroom.

After settling into their accommodation, the group decided to head straight to the temple. As they walked, Miyuki noticed the atmosphere change; The bright lights of the city were transformed into the calm of the temple.

Upon arriving at Sensō-ji, they felt small before its majesty. Paper lanterns illuminated the path, and the scent of incense filled the air. Miyuki closed her eyes for a moment, feeling the peace that emanated from the place. The girl and her brothers had visited Japan some time ago.

“Let's explore” Ethan said excitedly. “I want to take photos of everything.”

As they walked, they passed a handful of food vendors selling local delicacies. Chad stopped at one of them. “We must try the dorayaki!” he said, pointing excitedly. Everyone joined the line, laughing and enjoying the moment. “Shit, I don't remember the last time I ate one, they are delicious” Masashi said as he finished eating a dorayaki and ordered another one. “I want one too!” Nexorath said telepathically, "Don't worry, I'll buy some for you, if we buy more candy or food, I'll save some rations for you" Miyuki whispered with a smile, so that only the symbiote could hear her.

However, while they were enjoying the food, Miyuki felt someone watching her. He turned around, but only saw a group of tourists. She shook her head, convinced it was just her imagination.

"All good?" Ethan asked her, noticing her expression.

“Yeah, I just thought I saw something” she replied, but decided not to tell him more.

At the end of the day, the group gathered in front of the main gate of the temple. The atmosphere was magical, and everyone except Miyuki, Kenji, and Masashi took out their phones to capture the moment.

“This is just the beginning of our adventures in Japan!” Chad exclaimed, raising his camera.

But as they prepared for the photo, Miyuki felt a chill run down her spine again. This was going to end badly...

When they returned it was almost 12. Everyone went to their respective rooms, wishing each other good night. Miyuki walked into the room she would share with Ethan, Anika, and Mindy. The walls were decorated in light colors and there was a large window on the side where Mindy and Anika would sleep.

“This place isn't so bad after all” Anika commented, dropping her suitcase on the floor.

Miyuki smiled, although Nexorath was still alert, peeking out from behind her. “Sometimes I wonder if we're really safe here” he murmured.

“Stop worrying so much” Ethan told her, as he unpacked his clothes. “Let's enjoy our vacation. What we need is a good rest and then explore.”

Meanwhile, in the main room, Chad and Tara were getting comfortable. “Can you imagine what we could do here?” Chad said excitedly, looking around. “We can have a party at this house and explore the city during the day.”

“That sounds fun, but don't forget that we're also here to enjoy the culture” Tara responded, with a smile.

Returning to Miyuki's room, Mindy took out her phone and began searching for interesting places to visit. “Look at this! There is a lantern festival happening this week near here. “We should go!”

“Sounds great” Anika said, excitedly. “And then we could go to the temple again, especially at night. I think it would be magical.”

“It must be because of the fall, there are usually more festivals in Japan this time of year” Miyuki said as she got up from the futon, “I'll go get some water, I'll be right back.”

The girl was heading to the kitchen when she began to hear a very strange and terrifying noise. It was like a guttural and broken whisper, similar to a muffled lament, accompanied by a raspy tone that sent a shiver down Miyuki's back and caused her symbiote to poke its head out from its host's back at the imminent sensation of danger. “You didn't listen too, did you?”

“Yes, this place is definitely very strange. Something is hiding in the shadows.” Nexorath continued to remain alert as Miyuki continued on her way to the kitchen.

“I should talk to my aunt or investigate more about this place” the girl poured herself a glass of water while the symbiote tilted its head.

“You mentioned her before. What are you doing?" Nex asked as he searched through the kitchen shelves for the sweets that Miyuki had saved for him.

“She is an Itako. She lost her sight when she was a child because of an enemy family. He had to find a way to regain his sight, so he focused on spiritualism. "He always had a talent for the supernatural, and thanks to that, the spirits showed him a way of 'seeing', if it weren't for the milky tone of his eyes that indicate his blindness, anyone would think he had excellent eyesight."

“I spent decades locked in that laboratory and never heard that word.”

“I'm not surprised, after all, it is a word that is linked to the supernatural. Someone in science would never explore that field. When I said that I did not believe in ghosts, I was speaking from ignorance because nothing paranormal has ever happened to me; and look we know Doctor Strange.”

“HAHAHAHA, The magician? That guy is very funny” Nex spoke while stuffing his mouth with dorayakis.

Miyuki was about to respond, but something she saw through the window caught her attention. In the distance, on the golf course that could be seen from the kitchen window, there was someone standing, looking in her direction, although she couldn't be entirely sure...

“Nex… Can you see that person over there?” Miyuki asked as the symbiote turned its head in the direction where she was looking.

“…” “…” None of them said anything and they stood with a blank expression as they stared at the woman standing there. When they both turned their heads to look at each other and then turned their heads again toward the window, that woman was gone. A minute passed while Miyuki and her partner stood frozen, until they heard that terrifying moan again... right behind them. Very slowly, they both turned and saw her there, peeking out from the small food cellar.

Another few seconds passed that seemed like an eternity, until Miyuki whispered: “Por las sagradas chanclas de Jesucristo” (By the sacred flip flops of Jesus Christ). Right after, both the girl and the symbiote screamed at the top of their lungs at the same time. “AAAAHHHHHHHH” “AAAAHHHHHH.”

His screams caused everyone in the house to become alert. The group ran towards the kitchen; encountering a somewhat particular scene. Nexorath was holding a frying pan with an extra arm he had generated, Miyuki was holding a knife in each hand, and a few others were nailed to the kitchen pantry door.

“What the hell happened here?!” Mindy asked, seeing how upset Miyuki and Nexorath were. “There was a-a…” The girl tried to explain, but she could hardly articulate words, so it was the symbiote that finished the sentence for her. “There was a ghost! A damn abomination!! That damn thing was terrifying!!!”

"Ghost?" Tara spoke, somewhat skeptical, while Ethan approached his girlfriend to take the knives from her, followed by the girl's brothers to make sure she was okay.

Kenji looked at his sister to check that she wasn't hurt. Masashi came up next to hug his sister.

“Are you sure you saw a ghost? Wasn't it something else?" questioned Chad, who looked just as skeptical as Tara. Miyuki didn't respond. “My sister doesn't get upset about anything, look how she is. That means he really saw something.”

“I… I think I'll go to bed” the girl said as she left without looking at anyone.

Soon, Ethan, Mindy, and Anika entered the room. They found Miyuki lying on the futon she shared with Ethan. “Precious… Are you okay?” her boyfriend expressed concern. When there was no response, Anika approached her to hug her. “I believe you Miyu. You react to very few things, if you're this upset it's because something is happening." Miyuki looked at her and smiled a little, "Don't worry, Ani. I'm fine." After calming down his friends and insisting that he was fine. Everyone got ready to sleep, however, Miyuki and Nex slept with one eye open. Knowing that whatever that thing was, it was still stalking them.

The next day, the group had decided to visit the festival at night, to relieve the tension of the previous day. Miyuki seemed fine. The reality was that she was only pretending so as not to worry her friends and boyfriend.

During the day, before going to the festival, some had decided to go to the game room there, including Miyuki. The only ones who had decided not to go were his brothers, Sam and Quinn; SERIOUS MISTAKE. The four of them were talking in the living room of the house, when everything fell apart.

“Seriously, I was surprised when he wouldn't stop talking about her. When my brother fell in love with a girl, he barely mentioned anything about her; but then he met Miyuki and couldn't stop talking about her. Your sister has Ethan around her little finger and she hasn't realized it” I speak looking at Masashi and Kenji.

“We were just as surprised,” the taller boy spoke. Then Masashi mentioned what his sister's love life was like.

“Miyu dated a few guys before Ethan, she didn't seem really interested in any of them; until your brother arrived. She seemed happier, she didn't talk much about him, but her heartfelt eyes gave her away.”

“When we had meetings at our apartment, Ethan always asked if Miyuki would be there and vice versa. It was so much fun watching them give each other glances” Sam said, laughing at the memory.

Kenji was going to say something, but stopped when he heard a noise coming from the second floor. He wasn't the only one; The atmosphere in the house had become tense and oppressive.

"What was that?" Quinn asked, visibly scared.

“I have no idea” Sam replied, looking toward the stairs with a mixture of curiosity and fear.

The sound was strange, as if something or someone was crawling on the ground. A shiver ran down Kenji's spine as he realized that the noise seemed to be getting closer. With a protective instinct, he pulled Sam behind him, while Masashi did the same with Quinn.

“Where is that going?” Sam asked, his voice shaking.

Suddenly, the figure appeared at the threshold of the stairs. His eyes widened as he saw what it was: a spectral figure, with a disheveled appearance and a face that seemed to be in eternal agony.

“Fucking hell! Run!” Kenji ordered, and without hesitation, the four of them rushed towards the front door, their hearts pounding.

“What the fuck was that shit?!” Masashi exclaimed, running a hand through his hair, trying to calm himself.

“It must have been what Nexorath and Miyuki saw” Sam suggested, trying to remain calm, though the tremor in his voice betrayed his fear…

“We-we should tell the others” Quinn managed to articulate, who was so scared she could barely hold back her tears.

“Let's go” Kenji said, taking the lead. “We can’t stay out here.”

As they ran to reach the game room of the lodging place, the panic in the girls' hearts intensified. The image of the figure crawling on the ground remained etched in their minds.

“Guys, you have to listen to us!” Kenji shouted, attracting the group's attention.

“What's wrong?” Anika asked, worried by her friends' expressions.

“We saw… we saw something on the second floor. It was…” Sam couldn’t continue.

“Probably the same ghost that Miyu and Nex saw. He was crawling on the ground” Kenji finished, his voice steady.

The group's faces changed, the fun and excitement they had previously had fading. “Are you sure what you saw?” Tara asked, her voice strained.

“Completely” Masashi stated. “We are not joking. We need to do something.”

Miyuki, who had been in a corner, approached the group. “This place feels. Something is not right. Maybe we should leave, or at least investigate what's happening.”

"Investigate?" Chad repeated, his eyes narrowed. “No, we have to get out of here. This doesn’t sound good.”

But the thought of leaving the place filled them with a feeling of defeat. They couldn't let fear dominate them. Kenji looked at his friends and said, “If we're going to stay, we need to be together. None of us should separate ourselves from the group.”

They all nodded, knowing that facing the unknown was their only option.

After that conversation and everyone returned to the house, this time in discomfort, Miyuki stayed outside talking on the phone with her aunt, informing her of the situation so she could help them. When the call ended, Miyu went directly to the living room, where everyone was waiting for her, and sat down next to Ethan.

“Well? “What did Aunt Namika tell you?” Masashi asked.

“He will come first thing tomorrow morning.”

“Having to wait until tomorrow makes me nervous” Quinn said, crossing her arms.

“He said he had to prepare for the ritual, depending on which one he had to do. Each type of ghost has its own ritual.”

“While you were away, I took the time to research this place. “It's really scary what I discovered” Mindy mentioned as she sat on the floor with her phone in her hand.

“20 years ago, a woman was brutally murdered in this place. An older man had become obsessed with her, kidnapped her and brought her here. When she tried to contact the police, he murdered her in a horrible way; Months later, they found him dead, with every bone in his body broken.” Quickly everyone's expressions changed to one of horror at what Mindy said.

“Shit, I don't want to know more, what I heard was enough. Next time we take a trip, we will investigate the background of the accommodation places.” Quinn said with a displeased expression.

“I'll go to the hot springs. I don't care if they're also haunted or whatever; I just want to relax for at least one fucking minute without a ghost chasing my fucking ass.” Miyuki spoke, standing up to go pick up her bath products and take a well-deserved shower before entering the hot springs.

Only the girls followed her. The boys decided to stay inside and wait for them. After bathing, the girls entered the hot springs and started talking to lighten the mood.

“I think the only good thing about this trip has been the temple and these hot springs.” Mindy said with her eyes closed.

Only the girls followed her. The boys decided to stay inside and wait for them. After bathing, the girls entered the hot springs and started talking to lighten the mood.

“I think the only good thing about this trip has been the temple and these hot springs.” Mindy said with her eyes closed.

"Unfortunately. I don't like that they take this image from Japan. If we go back, I'll be sure to thoroughly research the accommodations so you don't have to worry about ghosts or demons.” Miyu smiled at her friends.

“I hope so, we've already dealt with murderers, we don't want to add ghosts to the list.” They all laughed at Sam's comment.

At that moment, Nexorath emerged from Miyuki's back.

“Is something wrong Nex?” The girl asked curiously.

“There is something on top of the wall…” The symbiote spoke and immediately the girls turned around, and sure enough, there was something; It was a… Wig?

Seconds later the hair jumped as if it had life, causing the girls to jump. When that… wig fell into the water; The ghost that had been stalking them all along began to emerge from beneath the water. Before it came out completely, they all screamed and immediately ran out of the hot spring with only their towels on. They didn't think about anything and just walked out of there and closed the door.

"What happened?!" Ethan asked. The rest of the boys were right behind him as he hugged Miyuki, but before anyone could say anything else, the door slowly opened…

Everyone began to walk slowly backwards with terror plastered on their faces, as the entity began to approach.

At that precise moment, Mrs. Namika pushed the group aside and stood right in front of Miyuki. “Watashinokazoku ni fureru koto wa yurusanai, kono jaakuna sonzai.” (I will not allow you to touch my family, you evil entity) The woman spoke in Japanese and made some signs with her hand, causing the entity to emit a very terrifying noise; Seconds later the ghostly woman vanished.

“Aunt Namika!” Miyuki exclaimed hugging her.

“I thought you wouldn't come until tomorrow.”

“Yes, but I had a very bad feeling. “I’m glad I arrived on time.”

“That thing disappeared. Is it over?” Chad asked, still quite scared.

“I'm afraid not. If it were that easy, someone would have broken this curse by now. But they have nothing to worry about. Pick up your things and return to New York. Buy your return tickets; My driver is waiting outside to give them to you and take you to the airport. I will take care of everything here.”

They didn't even think twice; The girls changed, everyone took their belongings and left the place to let the brothers' aunt work. The driver took them directly to the airport and handed them the tickets, wishing them a safe trip.

Quinn, still shaking, spoke. “Did that really happen? A curse?” His voice was full of disbelief.

“It seems so,” Kenji replied. “Sometimes reality is stranger than fiction.”

“I hope that means we're safe now,” Anika said, sounding hopeful.

Upon arriving at the airport, the bustle of the place gave them a sense of normality. They rushed to check in and go through security, but each carried with them the heavy burden of what they had experienced.

Finally, they called their flight and headed to the gate. Once on the plane, the group settled into their seats. “Love,” Miyuki spoke and Ethan looked at her with a raised eyebrow. “Next time Chad wins a raffle, remind me to hit him.” The boy laughed heartily. “I will remind you, precious. Don't worry." Ethan kissed his girlfriend on the lips and they both settled down to sleep. Yes, it was a shitty vacation.

Extra Notes: I was two days late posting this, but better late than never. This is my first fic, and I'm really sorry if there are many mistakes or problems with the narration; I hope to improve over time. I send you all a hug <3

[therogerclarkfanclub]

A new short film featuring Roger is in the works! You can check out the preview trailer below, however, Roger is not in this trailer.

Better Living... Through Thievery? • Directed by Dean C. Dusharme • Written by Dean C. Dusharme and Patrick A. Reilly

✨ CAST OF CHARACTERS

☆ Jim (Roger Clark)

Jim is the mid-40's, level-headed nephew of Sean and somewhat committed bank security guard (level-headed compared to Anne and Sean at least). He's frequently tested by the increasing stress of the situation. His primary goals are to help his sick fiancé Izzy with her medical costs and eventually afford to tie the knot. He has the strongest moral compass of the crew and brings very important knowledge to the bank job.

☆ Sean (Patrick A. Reilly)

Sean is played Patrick A. Reilly (and is also one of the writers). Sean, who is in his mid 60s, has to put up with his crazy ex-wife and gets dragged into the heist by the need to cover both of their medical bills. His Irish temper usually has him butting heads with his ex-wife Anne. He's got some locksmith skills that come in handy, and drinks a healthy amount of Twining's Earl Grey tea.

☆ Anne (Thea Sieban)

Anne is played by Thea. Anne (mid 60s) is the criminal mastermind who brings the caper idea to the table. She can be friendly and bakes great cookies, but she's also very smart and knows how to manipulate Jim and Sean into doing her bidding. Her emotions can get pretty fiery and she'll do whatever it takes to get the job done.

☆ Jack (John A. Holly)

Jack is played by John A. Holly. Jack (95) is Sean's uncle figure who suffers from advancing dementia. He can be both irritable and joyful, while also being naturally funny. He boasts about his exciting career in nude modeling. He also misses his long-deceased dad and often tries to get in touch with him, forgetting he's gone. Jack becomes a liability who they end up needing to bring along on the caper.

✨ The Story

"An unlikely heist crew of Sean, his ex-wife Anne, their nephew Jim and tech-savvy friend Mary perform a daring burglary of a local bank. They have to drag along Jack, Sean's adopted uncle, who has advancing dementia and a career in nude modeling at the ripe age of 95. Let's just say things get complicated with ol' Jack."

✨ The Heist

"Our characters develop and execute a heist plan that is unconventional compared to most caper movies. There are some of the common tropes like the computer hacker who assists them with security systems and the fact that something must go wrong somewhere along the way. What makes this heist story very unique though is how it's done by senior citizens for desperate reasons. They don't bring any guns, disguise themselves as exterminators and go in when the bank's closed just after sunrise on a Sunday morning. It's a smartly planned out burglary, not a reckless robbery. The main complication of the heist is not what most audience member's would expect, which helps to set our project apart from most other caper stories. I guess you'll have to watch the film to see exactly what goes down!"

✨ Social Commentary Value

"Our film is meant to come convey an important social commentary topic, being common issues with the medical system in the United States and how everyday people are forced to confront extremely costly bills. Problems with insurance, the pension system and other facets of medical care are to be alluded to and explored in this film. Each of the characters either has some kind of expensive illness or is helping someone who does. The serious tone brought about by characters with realistic problems and motivations is balanced with the absurd comedy of burglarizing a bank in the manner they do."

✨ The Film's Title

"Better Living… Through Thievery? is a play on an old advertising slogan originating from DuPont, a multinational chemical company, which often reads "Better Things for Better Living… Through Chemistry." The "Through Chemistry" part is replaced with "Through Thievery?" to humorously point out how not only are the characters trying to find quality of life through their medications, treatments and other forms of chemistry, as it pertains the original meaning, but also how they decide a venture into theft is necessary to pay for their essentials. The phrase now sarcastically becomes about the "unbridled optimism" surrounding crime and theft and the ability it has to sort out human dilemmas."

And lastly, there is no obligation whatsoever, but if you are able to spare a donation for the film's production, you can do so below. There are different tiers and they all come with different perks, so you'll be getting something in return for your donation.

[eleonkraken]

Someone said Empire of Death was better than Wedding of River Song which I really felt couldn't be true. So I decided to skim through Wedding of River Song and watch some scenes to see if my gut feeling was right. But then I watched the whole thing because it's really well executed and engaging and fun even if its resolution is messy.

In Empire of Death I felt like once Sutekh turned the universe to dust there were no stakes anymore because I knew anything that happened was going to get undone. Wedding of River Song is kind of similar because that takes place mostly in a parallel type universe. But that story still feels like it has stakes somehow? I don't exactly understand why I feel this difference but I think it has to do with how well I know the characters and how much I care about them. Ruby is still a bit cookie-cutter to me, and her relationship with the Doctor is less fleshed out and meaningful compared to the Doctor's relationship with Amy, or even River. Eleven's tardis team really feels like a family at this point in the story whereas Ruby still feels very much like a guest. (Probably the fault of the short season but then when you have a short season maybe you shouldn't write this kind of world-destroying-and-rebooting conflict as your finale.)

And in TWoRS, Amy's actions towards Madame Kovarian in the parallel universe did end up actually mattering to her even if that was never "real".

River and the Doctor basically considered themselves married after the fact even though the ceremony wasn't technically real.

The Doctor, even though he didn't actually die did appear to die for the rest of the universe, which had some consequences going forward.

What are the consequences of turning the universe to dust and then reviving it? I'm interested to see that but none were presented in the episode itself.

The mysteries and their solutions- it's often said that TWoRS has a really underwhelming solution to some of Moffat's loose plot threads. The main complaint being that the solution of having Eleven hide inside a robot version of himself to escape a fixed point in time feels like a cop-out. It is, but at the same time, the existence of these robots was established before, and as a solution, it makes intuitive sense on a first viewing. Even if it was disappointing on a larger scale it did make sense in the moment. I feel like that's infinitely more satisfying than RTD's non-answers in EoD which basically boiled down to 'the birth mother is magically significant because we bestowed her with significance' and never you mind the spooky cloak or the changing memory or the invisible road sign.

And I do like Ncuti and Millie (and Bonnie) and the rest of the cast and think they did a great job, but it just wasn't nearly as engaging or enjoyable of a viewing experience as something like TWoRS.

And I still feel like the pacing of RTD2 is very weird and the scenes go on for far too long. And I think if RTD isn't going to take the conflicts and their solutions seriously then he needs to lean into the comedy and charm of the show a lot more to make it satisfying and fun to watch (like Rogue or Dot and Bubble!).

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 14: DREAM CATCHER - Episode 2: Full-Power Comedy Etude

Tenma: MANKAI Company’s rank right now is 30th…

Yuki: The Spring Troupe’s performance jumped us up a notch, but we can’t quit now if we want to get to the top 10.

Kumon: The final ranking will be determined by the total of all points until 4Q, so we gotta earn as many as possible…

Izumi: Although not as many as in the pre-voting, there really are many new theater companies set up by influencers and the like in the top rankings of Q1.

Kazunari: There weren’t that many shows during 1Q, so the social media sway was probs extra strong.

Muku: But being overtaken in the blink of an eye is kind of sad.

Muku:  Even though all of us have grown since our debut performance, as a group as well as individually, and our fans have been steadily increasing since then…

Kumon: Right… We overcame all sorta troubles, and even won the Special Fleur Award…

Tenma: For what reason have we been building up everything till now…

Yuki: Well, I guess we’re back to square one.

Kazunari: We just gotta do our best from here!

Misumi: Yup~ I’ll give you the triangle cookie I got for the performance I guest-starred in the other day, so cheer up~

Yuki: So the Triangle Alien’s love for triangles is famous amongst other troupes too.

Misumi: I’m famous~?

Yuki: You’re probably the most famous Triangle Alien. Since you’re the only one.

Tenma: He doesn’t need to be famous for that.

Kazunari: I’m doing some research on the social media side too, and it seems most of the hashtags are about the companies on the top of the ranking.

Izumi: Ah, Masumi-kun has also gathered data for that.

Kazunari: GW, Massu! He’s even got the percentages in there!

Tenma: His promotional skills are steadily improving.

Kazunari: I gotta take my visual promos more seriously than ever too~

Kumon: We may not have a script yet, but is there anything we can do right now?

Muku: I don’t want to sit around doing nothing. I’ll get anxious if I don’t do anything…

Tenma: Staying gloomy and thinking things through definitely isn’t the Summer Troupe way of doing things.

Tenma: In other words…

Yuki: Long story short, we should do that?

Tenma: Exactly.

Kumon: It’s decided!

Misumi: Since it’s decided, let’s gooo!

-

Kazunari: “This planet is now ours! Tri, tri, tri…”

Misumi: “... Angle, angle, angle. Bow before us, you Earthlings!”

Yuki: “Ugh… If we don’t do something soon, the Earth will fall in ruins by the Triangle Aliens… Are we really powerless…?”

Tenma: “No, not yet… We can’t fall here…!”

Kumon: “The Earth is ours.”

Muku: “Quietly submit to us.”

Yuki: “What!? The Triangle Aliens have multiplied!?”

Kazunari: “Perfect timing. You should work with us and–”

Misumi: “Wait! No, these guys are–”

Kumon: “Co, co, co…”

Muku: “ne, ne, ne…”

Tenma: “Cone Aliens…!”

Kazunari: “You misleading lot…!”

-

[Applause]

Misumi: Thank you very much~!

Tenma: Thank you very much!

Passerby A: Good luck on your performance~!

Passerby B: We’ll be rooting for you, MANKAI Company!

Kazunari: Thank yooouu~!

Passerby C: The Street ACT we saw before was interesting, but so was this~!

Passerby D: Yup, and it looks like someone’s doing one near the station, let’s go check that one out too!

Izumi: There’s Street ACTs all over the place today, too.

Muku: This really drives home that the theater companies are increasing.

Tenma: We gotta keep our spirits high.

Ibuki: Woah, hold on a sec. Ain’t you MANKAI Company?

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[fatfables]

Lower, Back, and Payne

A Fat Fable

Mike, Jim, and Tim never realised for years that their names formed a pun or joke of some sort. Best friends since starting middle school, it wasn’t until college that they hit upon the right order, or combination, while trying to come up with a comedy troupe name.

In high school they had formed a band, ‘The Paynes’, with Tim as the lead singer and his “brothers” on drums and guitar. But nobody was interested in seeing a bunch of short fat guys playing Smash Mouth covers badly, so that soon died out. A comedy troupe was a much better idea.

Especially since Mike, the Lower of the group, had been wheelchair bound due to his diabetes. They put up posters in the Student’s Union building in which Mike was sitting in his extra wide wheelchair, Jim just faced the camera and stuck his belly out, while Tim gave a double thumbs up. Hilarious. Who wouldn’t find three heavily overweight frat boys funny? Morons, that’s who.

Their routine didn’t contain any real jokes of sorts, nor any sketches, skits, or stories. It was comprised of an ad hoc collection of slapstick moments that were supposed to form a “surreal farce.” In reality it did no such thing. It was just three unfunny, over-confident and overweight Oregon boys, who had never been told any better. Who had never been told ‘no’.

Their strapline was, Lower, Back and Payne: It’s Excruciating! It was supposed to be ironic. Because somehow, that's funny. Only it wasn’t. Unless you like a constant stream of mooning, farting, burping, and purposefully messy overeating. It was immature to the point of being extreme. They performed three shows in the college theatre to a less than warm reception from a handful of drunk students and seemed doomed to never perform again, until, unbeknown to them one of their performances was posted online by an unknown person in the audience.

This person probably wanted to just embarrass the three fat idiots. Afterall online bullying is ok when the victims deserve it. However, the performance became a minor online hit within a certain community. At first it was only available on YouTube, but it really took off when numerous shorter clips were posted to TikTok. As a half hour show it was nauseously disjointed, but as twelve second clips it took on a new lease of life.

You see, it turned out that a fat jock frat boy slipping on a greasy taco bell wrapper and faux falling into the bloated face of a morbidly obese diabetic in a wheelchair as his already sagging trousers slip down below his ass and he farts violently in said diabetics face, IS funny!

And apparently sexy.

It took Lower, Back, and Payne a while to cotton on to the kinkier reasons as to why they were suddenly successful. Homo-ertocism had certainly not been the aim, but they were happy enough to embrace it. Any kind of fame was better than no fame at all. If some people liked to see Tim eat twenty hot dogs before burping loudly into Jim’s flabby vibrating ass, only for the ass to fart back in Tim’s face, then why not give the people what they want?

It was clear to Mike, Jim, and Tim that their audience liked that they were fat. Because they told them so in the comments. The threesome hence set about getting fatter. This was easy for wheelchair bound Mike who was already huge and very immobile. JIm and Tim had to work harder at it. They had to plan their meals, count their calories, and ensure that they were consistently eating enough to gain.

Ginger haired Jim who was only five feet six, started at 280 lbs and within three months he had eaten his way up to 350. His belly bulged and his buttocks swelled as he gorged daily on IHOP all you can eat pancakes. He got excited for their famous buttermilk pancakes filled and topped with lemon cream cookie pieces, creamy cheesecake mousse and whipped topping. He could devour twenty of them in one sitting and still be ready to eat again an hour later - when he would go to Waffle House.

The brunette Tim with his deep brown eyes and deep dark navel, stuffed his stomach silly on record amounts of In-N-Out Burgers, which quite simply went in much quicker than they ever came out. He soon learned to not just enjoy, but love, the sensuous feeling of an overstuffed and bulging belly, rammed full of multiple burgers and cokes. He relished the sensation of his straining gut pushing out against his fraying 42 inch jeans. He was in love with how his own handles hung heavy and low at his sides, growing thicker and softer with every day. He was also top heavy, with massive moobs and oversized nipples that had started to stretch across his chest and under his ever widening arms. He broke the 370 lb limit after three months.

Lower, Back, and Payne now felt like they were ready, fat enough for their ultimate performance, the event that would break them.

They planned a new thirty minute show that was quite frankly just a rip-off of “The Aristocrats.” But they didn’t care, they needed to show the world just how fat and sexy they were. And if anybody just happened to laugh then, well, that was ok too.

The performance was filmed by a mutual friend, Danni, who also agreed to play the role of the talent scout. Mike, Jim, and Tim would enter the scouts office and offer to perform their show as a demonstration of their ‘comic’ abilities. The talent scout nervously agreed.

The 500 lb cripple entered first. It was hard to tell due to the effect of gravity on his low hanging fat but, Lower, was apparently already naked. He appeared to be heavily bloated and grabbed hold of his huge belly and attempted to lift the fat folds at the sides with his already reddening hands whilst declaring, “I need more!” He then produced a 20 oz bottle of coke from what seemed like his ass and began to chug it down greedily. At this point Jim Back entered wearing only an oversized woman’s bikini which cupped his soft doughy breasts perfectly but clearly left the top end of his soft cock sticking out against his thick left thigh. The tightness of the bikini string appeared to be turning it blue. He carried a tray of what seemed like fifty chocolate eclairs which he balanced expertly on top of his huge glutted out belly. Taking a swift look at the handicapped diabetic, he let out a devilish smile, and grabbed the only half empty coke bottle from him. He violently shook it up and then sprayed the remaining ten ounces straight into his immobile friend’s mouth before beginning to jam the eclairs in as well. At this point Tim Payne entered. He was also naked but as hard as a rock. His thick swollen dick appeared to be holding up his immense belly like scaffolding. He did a sexy twirl, shook his more than twunky fat ass, and farted, before also taking some of the eclairs and jamming them up Jim’s ginger ass. Being very soft by nature the creamy and chocolatey pastry treats didn’t enter very far at first, more just smashing into the rim and edges of his fat friend's ass, smearing the inside of his heavy cheeks. Seemingly uncontented with this state of affairs Tim suddenly rammed his whole fist in causing Jim to shriek and spasm. His fat layers vibrated and Tim drooled as he removed his arm, filled his hands with multiple eclairs, and rammed it right back in there. Jim, overcome with pleasure, felt his cock fill with blood so quickly that it burst open the bikini string that was trapping it, leaving a dark red line across the centre of his shaft where the string had so painfully cut into his member. He climbed up onto the wheelchair and forced his newly erect dick deep into the obese cripples eclair filled mouth. Mike bit down hard on it and drew blood before sucking with all of his 500 lb might. The wheelchair based giant's mouth was now full of cream and cake and cock. Tim kept jamming more eclairs into Jim’s gaping asshole while Mike continued to fellate him. Once there were no cakes left, Tim loudly declared, “I’M HUNGRY!!” Banged his massive belly three times and forcing his fat head in between his friends glorious ass cheeks began to eat the more than chocolatey eclairs back out of the hole. Mike, still holding onto the empty 20 oz cola bottle decided to reinsert it into his asshole where it had apparently come from. With a mighty effort he managed to raise his left cheek, which in itself must have weighed 100 lbs, and sat peacefully down on it. A cracking noise could be heard as the bottle reshaped itself under the force. By now Tim was digging both hands into Jim’s hole in order to remove the eclairs that he himself had forced far up into his bowels. He joyously filled his greedy mouth with as much smushed up creamy, pastry and goo as he could. This continued for a good minute or so until someone's mobile phone rang.

All three fat boys pretended to look around surprised, as if they weren’t expecting the call. The phone kept ringing until Jim noticed that Tim’s ass was vibrating. “My turn!” he stated triumphantly and stuck his right hand in, no lube, and retrieved the Samsung A15. “Hello! Yes we’re in room 304. Come straight up!” The thought of the soon to be arriving feast got all of them excited and they jacked each other off with real zeal so that when the poor, actually unsuspecting delivery boy entered his reaction was one of true horror. “Very Method” Mike said of the boy’s acting as he whelped and threw the massive bag of friend chicken at the three obese perverted faggots and their weird camp friend sat at a desk in a dress. “What, no tip required?” Tim asked as he struggled to lean forward, almost losing his balance due to his abundant belly and hard-on, in order to retrieve the grease stained bag.

Tim and Jim with a lot of effort tipped the naked 500 lb Mike up out of his chair so that he thumped to the floor with a Earthquake like thud. Jim then reached into his fat folds and magically removed a funnel. This he placed in the Goliath’s mouth while Tim set about ramming the fried chicken up his own ass in an effort to ‘mash it’. He climbed onto the desk, which bowed under his weight, and perched his ass over the top of the funnel. Jim held the funnel just in the right place so that Tim could “shit” into it whilst he could also get the tip of his cock over the lip. Tim clenched his fists and gurned as hard as he could. It took real effort to fart the first of the chicken out, but after that it started flowing quite freely due to the immense build up of his gas in his overloaded intestines. JIm squeezed and pulled at his cock as hard as he could whilst fisting himself with his left hand. As soon as he punched his prostate the cum also started flowing freely and the milky brown mixture was enviously gulped down by Mike who immediately started jacking off again due to the immense pleasure of feeling his stomach fill and swell with the disgusting mixture. In total more than 150 cum drenched smelly ass boneless chicken strips were farted into his mouth. While this was happening Tim continued to fill his own belly with chicken burgers, fries and cola. He needed to keep himself bloated as fuck in order to keep the gas supply high enough. In total he consumed over 5000 calories. The weight of which caused his bulging belly to grow and swell. It stretched and strained forward until he finally lost his balance and fell forward onto the desk, cracking the desk in two and tumbling backward on top of Mike whose pelvis snapped under the weight of his fat sexy friend. Jim, in an honest attempt to help his flailing blobby friends, who were now both screaming on the floor covered in shit stained chicken mush, cum, and ass blood, leant forward too quickly. The weight of his own distended ball gut, pulled tightly on his back and he slipped a disc at the L5-S1 level. The disc trapped his sciatic nerve and the pain shot all the way down his thick right leg and into his pudgy fat-laden toes within a tenth of a second. He howled in pain, like an obese wolf having a heart attack, and also fell to the floor. All three boys were writhing in agony before they could even get to their climax.

Danni, thinking that the show was over, rose to her feet and applauded loudly before delivering her only line “And what do you call yourselves?”

“Call us an ambulance!” Tim cried.

“You’re all an ambulance.” She said in a deadpan tone.

It was the oldest and funniest joke of the night.

Read more (and often better) fat fables at https://www.fatfables.com/

[tiredgamergirl]

Welcome to the Darkside. We have cookies. Well, we had until someone ate them.

Usually games that involve the supernatural are considered quite hard to penetrate because of their shocking images, dense plot, and oppressive atmosphere that might not be everyone’s cup of tea. Adventure games also have the reputation of being hard to grasp, with logic puzzles that coined the term “moon logic” because it is so out there only a lunatic can grasp. But what about mixing both and throwing the dread out of the window and wrapping it all with some witty humor and puzzles that you don’t need a PhD in out-of-the-box thinking? That’s where The Darkside Detective comes. Conceived during a Jam, the developers Spooky Doorway crafted six cases (and three bonuses) that are bite-sized self-contained short adventures, each hardly over an hour long to solve even in a relaxed pace.

Detective Francis McQueen is a detective of the Darkside Division of the Twin Lakes City police department, who always gets dispatched with the strangest cases along with his partner, police officer Dooley – who is quite the himbo.

The retro style can bring memories of old titles, like Simon the Sorcerer,the Secret of Monkey Island, or even the King’s Quest series, with charming and colorful visuals. Thankfully the game has modern sensibilities, so the simple visuals also reflect a simpler and snappier gameplay and take the term “point-and-click” quite literally. Anything highlighted has a commentary from McQueen and there isn’t any of the dreaded pixel hunting to nitpick every last screen. It is a literal love letter to the classics of the genre and also a nice introduction for those who never played one but always wanted to try it out. The music grants some gravitas to the game, creating a spooky atmosphere that is inspired by horror classics and can give a certain air of mystery and tension without being overbearing and complimenting the visuals along with the story.

Everything about this game is a work of love for adventures and classics like the X-Files and Twin Peaks, the banter between McQueen and Dooley is always a treat to witness and it can get even wittier when they interact with many of the other characters, some even recurring ones. The short duration of the stories make sure they never over stay their welcome and places the duo in a number of different situations brimming with creativity. The absurdity of the situations lean to the comedy and unexpected punchlines.

After the release of the game the developers added three more cases along with a teaser to the follow up, The Darkside Detective: A Fumble in the Dark. One of these extra cases is actually much shorter than the others, closer to a mini-scenario similar to the free-roaming in Case 6 of the main game, but the others are along the same length of the main story.

The Darkside Detective is a charming game, full of personality and it is clear the dedication and care present in every screen. Give it a chance and enjoy the ride.

[orion-my-rion]

oh please gay middle aged men….

ok i wanted to answer this as soon as i got it but it was past midnight for me and i had to go to sleep lol. anyway i'm awake now so It's Time. (i wrote so much more than i thought i would. i've been typing for like an hour...)

so it all started when i had to write a 10 minute play for a creative writing project last year. we did some brainstorming exercises to make sure everyone in the class had something compelling to write for, and one of those exercises involved selecting common tropes in famous plays at random. so we had to pick three slips of paper from the box and come up with a story that ties in the three tropes we ended up with. the professor was a little concerned when i pulled "nationalism," "fate vs free will," and . a third thing i can't for the life of me remember. it honestly might have been like "nature vs man" lol i don't know. anyway, everyone was surprised when i actually came up with something.

the original story goes like this: three average american dudes living average american lives. they don't follow soccer, but they know that team usa is somehow on their way to the world cup, so they've employed their usual (over-the-top) superstitions to help them along. the night before the championship, one of them orders chinese takeout (they're not allowed to order "enemy cuisine" until that team is out of the running (china hasn't qualified for the world cup since 2002 but just pretend with me)) and ends up with an extremely specific fortune cookie that says as long as the three of them watch the whole match, usa will win. naturally, the paper then spontaneously combusts and he has to convince the other two without it.

so, on a stormy night three dudes who know next to nothing about soccer but combined have all the sports-related superstitions in the world are now watching the world cup, knowing that they have already set the outcome of the game in their favor just by seeing it through but not trusting that enough to abandon their frankly insane rituals. most of the comedy of the play is tied to someone being told to absolutely under no circumstances sit down/stand up/touch the tv remote/talk about losing/talk about winning/etc. in the end, the power briefly goes out in the storm, the game is lost in the few seconds they aren't watching, and the play closes with the commentators dragging usa for an incredible loss while the guys realize what happened.

i was happy with the play and received great remarks on it, but i've been wanting to rewrite it some before putting it anywhere. more importantly tho i spent so long writing these guys for a ten minute play that i came up with all sorts of side info for them. i also changed their names because i didn't like the ones i wrote for the class (i gave them dudebro names but they weren't middle-aged sounding enough lol).

first of all, they're in a polycule. they've known each other since childhood but only got together in adulthood, and they don't live together just yet. they all work fairly steady jobs and spend their time off at one of their places depending on what they plan on doing.

the one hosting the fifa watch party is adam. he's the most superstitious and as a former star athlete he knows the most of the three (minimal) about soccer. he has the nicest place with the biggest tv and keeps it mostly clean. it is mentioned in the play that he likes to watch asmr videos with the sound off because he doesn't like the sound.

the one who opened the fortune cookie is kenny, short for kenneth. he doesn't understand or give a damn about any sport and is extremely skeptical, but was interested to see how his weird as fuck fortune would turn out. he also drinks too much dr pepper. this does come up in the play. his place is actually a mess (he's very forgetful) but the other guys find it endearing. he thinks it's bizarre that the first guy watches asmr for the visuals since it's supposed to be about the sound.

the third guy is curtis. he's pretty superstitious but the only sport he really understands and pays attention to is american football. he spends most of the time acting super "usa! usa!" to the point where the other two are like "hey man you're not usually like this we're here for you if you need to talk." he's very emotional because he has a big heart. his house is a little messy but only because he has two or three dogs that everyone loves very much. he thinks asmr stands for "audio something something something."

i could continue to make up new things about them forever. they're like old friends to me. kenny loves food but can't cook (he Can but it doesn't turn out very well). curtis is the Real chef of the three, and the other two want him to make a living of it but he's not confident enough in his abilities. adam is a little bit scared of dogs but was introduced very gently to curtis' dogs and now they're mostly chill. kenny doesn't yet know that he's a cat person because he's a big fan of dogs and doesn't know that those aren't mutually exclusive (and then one day he rescues a stray kitten and that animal becomes his Child). curtis got the other two into street fighter when they were younger and is still a little upset that they both turned out to be better than him (and that they still are). god. my guys. my guys.

i love boring characters who experience situations it's like fun to me please understand. i've been wanting to write more plays with them and whatnot. whenever i get around to that i'll probably post about it on neocities :)

ok that's enough rambling for one morning lol hope everyone enjoyed it 👍

[slushiecookie]

Hey y'all, I'm Slushie Cookie, but you can call me Slushie for short 👀

I'm Bisexual, my pronouns are They/Them, and this is a safe space for LGBTQ+ ppl! :D

My interests/likes include: Bugs, Deep Sea Creatures, HTF, TNM (The Nightly Manor), BFDIA, BFB (Pre-Split), and Inanimate Insanity 1 and 2 (Not 3)

I do love myself some brutal gore and body horror, so be warned! And I also love to use emoticons and mostly correct punctuation, so I hope it doesn't come off as passive-aggressive or anything ^^'

Fanart is allowed and welcome! I love art, and it makes me happy that someone wants to draw my OCs! <D

Other Platforms:

Instagram (WAY more active there!)

Toyhou.se (Nearly all of my OCs! ^^)

Wattpad (The stories are kinda old and cringe but I might as well lol)

Youtube (Dead... atm 👀)

My general tags!

#glowball's OCs : my original characters!

My tags! These are for my stories

#bells of religious isolation : a story about a cohort of priests living under a corrupt religion! Contains religious themes, gore, and abuse

#pilot! : a story about a pillow who dies, then comes back to life extremely unlucky! (And a curse of reviving every time he dies, he gets revived in a cardboard box) The story follows Pilot and his innocent friend Chewy as they job-hop to pay their rent...and try to avoid death. This story is a comedy and slice of life but contains heavy gore!

#turning point : With objects-turned bloodthirsty aquatic monsters running rampant in the cruise, Rotary Phone, his friends, and other passengers have to survive in the slowly sinking ship until help arrives, it it even does. Contains gore, body horror, some drugs, alcohol use!

#symmetry os (tba)

Disclaimer for the Tumblarians

I don't really reblog here! ^^' I want to keep my blog as clean and organized as possible, as well as avoid confusion between my and others' posts! I know that it's a very big part of Tumblr culture, but it just isn't for me :'))

DNI if you're homophobic, transphobic, racist, sexist, a zoophile, a pedo, a bigot, or just an overall bad person :')

[curestardust]

Dust Watched: FLCL: Grunge

Genres: Action, Sci-Fi, Comedy // 3 episodes // S01/02 (x) S03 (x)

Ok, but why?

✧  story  & characters ✧

For the basic set-up, let me just copy-paste this part from an older review:

"As usual, we get to witness a coming-of-age story with a lot of weird space shit and mechas thrown in. Mechanical Mechanica is trying to flatten Earth(?), Haru is doing her thing, seducing people and beating up robots while our main character has shit growing out of his head. As I said, the usual."

The 3 episodes follow Shinpachi, Shonari, and Orinoko individually and every episode is tied together by the events that take place on the final night and of course, Haruko's involvement.

Haruko and MM are doing the same thing they've been doing for the every past entry so let's look at the characters and they're... not very good? Or should I say, they don't have enough time for their stories' ending to feel like they really paid off.

Shinpachi is just chilling. He is the son of a sushi chef and that's literally it. Shonari has the most chaotic 23 minutes of character buildng I've ever seen; from the fact that he is an alien which isn't even explained properly, to his brother being an alcoholic Yakuza member, to his bullying, crush on Orinoko, and I could keep going but won't for spoiler reasons. The pacing in his episode was horrid too and I legitimately had no idea what was going on multiple times (not in a FLCL way, but in a "bad writing" way). Orinoko has a pretty interesting backstory but I didn't like the way they wrapped up her story. Despite the emphasis being on "finding your OWN future", she pretty much gets her final decision made for her by the other two. She doesn't oppose it... but she didn't have agency in it either.

✧  art  ✧

Hooooo boy. The fact that it's CGI will already turn a lot of people off but as someone who's watched a few this show is UGLY. I cracked up at the first close up shot of Haruko. She looks so bad, oh my word.

The animation is all over the place quality wise too. It does have a few nice enviromental shots. Some of the character designs were quite creative (and more importantly, worked as 3D models), and I enjoyed the randomly inserted 2D animation shots... although they just looked so much better that I was then disappointed when it went back to the CGI.

Listen, the goofiness, the craziness, the cookiness of FLCL IS here. But the CGI is just hands down not pleasant to look at. Is there worse? Definitely. But geez.

✧  sound ✧

The Pillows is back, and while nostalgia and straight up bangers really carry this whole thing, it carries it *so hard* it almost felt like I was watching an overcomplicated 1.5 hour long music video.

✧  overview ✧

Overall, I didn't hate my (short) time with this but in the end my question is: why? This entire thing felt like an AU for the original. It's references upon references. Which would be fine but it doesn't do anything with it? WHY? We already have the original! Why was this made? Why did it have to be FLCL? A longer runtime wouldn't even have helped here (besides fixing some of the pacing) because I really don't think they had much to say or show that hasn't been done (better) before by the original or even the movie sequels.

Late addition: my score was actually higher as I started writing this coming off the hectic experience of watching... well, any FLCL media, but the aftertaste of this show is worse than I thought it'd be. I had some fun watching it but now the only things I remember are the bad parts.

My Rating: 3.2/10

[tilbageidanmark]

Movies I watched and books I read this Week #127 (Year 3/Week 33):

The Fury of a Patient Man, a tense Spanish thriller about a man who waits 8 years to take revenge on the killers of his fiancé.

🍿

2 tender Japanese dramas by female director Naomi Kawase plus another by Yasujirō Ozu:

🍿 Tokyo Twilight, my 6th Ozu drama. A story about an older, single father, two grown up sisters, a mother who left and then came back, an unplanned pregnancy and a death of a daughter. Tragic, subtle and patient family soap opera, his last film that was beautifully shot in black and white.

🍿 I used to enjoy eating Dorayaki, the cookie-snack made of two small bean-filled pancakes, which we often bought at ‘Ranch 99’ stores. Kawase’s Sweet bean is a slow, emotional food porn story, about a solitary owner of such a small Dorayaki store. He hires a 76-year-old woman with a recipe for a better red bean filling, as well as a dark personal secret. Gentle and poetic.

🍿 I was curious about her earlier (1992) art film Embracing because of (personal) reasons. It’s a cinema-verite exploration of her own search for her father, who had left her and family when she was a small girl. Meditative poem about abandonment, loss and identity.

🍿

Eveready Harton in Buried Treasure is the first-ever hard-core, triple-X pornographic cartoon from 1928. It was made clandestinely by certain unknown illustrators from three studios, Disney, Max Fleischer and the Mutt and Jeff studio. It's as explicit as you can get, and involves masturbation, intercourse, bestiality, anal penetration, dildos, ejaculation, and so much more. It was made for a private stag party at the studio, and obviously was never exhibited publicly. Available in full on Wikipedia, and highly recommended. (Photo Above).

🍿

2 directed by Pixar’s Peter Sohn:

🍿 Partly Cloudy, his earlier short about a stork that is delegated to delivering the “less desirable” babies, these of porcupines, and crocodiles and electric fish. Really, Storks?…

🍿 The disappointing new computer-animated Elemental was the first Pixar product I couldn’t finish. A shallow 100% Disneyfied world building that started at a Disney cruise, and moved into a mythical Disneyland, without a heart or a soul. 1/10.

🍿

Because I'm a political masochist, I watched the 4-hour 2020 documentary The Reagans. I always held that this despicable puppet-master, was the most destructive modern American president, even more than Nixon. A good looking elitist, affable reactionary, a nicely-smelling, racist piece of shit, who changed America for the worst, and laid the foundations for all the horrors that were later Donild Trump. As Higgins told Condor: "You poor dumb son of a bitch. You've done more damage than you know."

I have to stop watching movies about monsters.

🍿

Paco León Spanish sex comedy 'Kiki, Love to love' that I saw last week, was kinky, delightful and original. So I was surprised to read that it was a remake of an Australian film. However, The little death had no juice at all, it was forced, prurient, unfunny and worst of all - unsexy. 2/10.

🍿

On the flight from Denmark to Israel I read the “erotic” thriller Skinny Dip. I used to like Carl Hiaasen years ago, but this story of a wife who survives being thrown from the deck of cruise ship, was mediocre pulp. The worst part was the Hebrew translation, which made it unreadable. 1/10.

🍿  

(My complete movie list is here)

[madly-empirical]

Has Hollywood Gone Batty? 

L.A. TIMES ARCHIVES

AUG. 29, 1993 12 AM PT 

Bravo to author Anne Rice (“Interview With the Vampire’s Picky Creator,” Film Clips, Aug. 22) for having the courage and honesty to publicly voice what thousands of her readers have been crying about for weeks: Tom Cruise is totally miscast as the Vampire Lestat.

Producer David Geffen is dead wrong about casting being solely a director’s choice. As members of the moviegoing public are the ones whose money will dictate how successful the film is or is not, any of the film’s financiers would be smart to listen to them (a great example of this would be the public’s choice of Clark Gable for “Gone With the Wind”).

If the screenplay remains true to its source in its dealings with the homoerotic relationship between the two lead vampires (as well as some subsidiary fangsters they meet along the way), I doubt that anyone could truly conjure the hopelessly hetero Cruise as a character actor strong enough to overcome his more-than-well-established screen persona of boy next door. His support from Geffen, himself only recently out of the closet, is curious, to say the least.

I find it ironic that the long-awaited transition of “Interview With the Vampire” from novel to screen is falling victim to another kind of bloodsucker--the Hollywood kind.

DAVE HUTCHINSON

Mission Viejo

P.S. Besides Jeremy Irons and Daniel Day-Lewis, how about three other fellow Brits for consideration, all with neck-biting experience? Gary Oldman has played gay men and king vampires with a lot of success. Or how about Julian Sands, from the low-budget wonder “Tale of a Vampire,” just released on video? And of course there’s always Ben Cross, who recently hung up his cape as Barnabas Collins in the “Dark Shadows” revival.

*

Fans of “Interview With the Vampire,” be they Cruise fans or not, must surely be aghast at his casting as Lestat. The milk-and-cookies star has neither the physical presence nor the range as an actor to effectively play the role.

Think of Dana Carvey as Dirty Harry, and you can see how implausible is the casting of Cruise as Lestat. Cruise flashing those fangs for the first time will likely engender unwarranted laughter from the audience, just as Carvey as Dirty Harry would saying “Make my day.”

With the attachment of director Neil Jordan to the project, this book seemed destined to become a fully realized artistic success after languishing for 15 years waiting to be made. Jordan should be capable of properly tackling the homoerotic elements of Rice’s sensual story, as he so ably proved with his tale of sexual ambiguity in “The Crying Game.”

Cruise’s experiment in stretching his acting range may be as painful for his audience to watch as Sylvester Stallone’s pathetic forays into comedy have been. And with the potential for a $200-million box office due to the wide public regard for Rice’s novel and the bunch-o-hunks cast producer Geffen has assembled, it is not likely that any changes will be forthcoming (as in Cruise realizing he is very wrong for the part and backing out).

Cruise as the Interviewer, yes. Cruise as Lestat (I’m still trying to stop laughing), no.

JEFF SOFTLEY

Los Angeles

*

Are they out of their cotton-picking minds? Say it ain’t so, Joe!

Back in 1978, when Rice’s “Interview With the Vampire” was first considered for a film adaptation, there was a short-lived plan to star John Travolta as the tormented vampire Louis. Now that scheme is look back on as preposterous.

But here it is 1993, and fans of Rice’s novel are forced to endure the same thing all over again, this time in the far more serious threat of Tom Cruise. Once again, the powers that be have decided to cast a young, “hot” actor they think will best pull in the big bucks, the character be damned (no pun intended).

But what was a bad idea in ’78 is a bad idea in ‘93, and oh, what a character to sacrifice! Here is a character so strong and affecting that he renders poet, novelist and National Public Radio commentator Andrei Codrescu, your Aug. 8 cover subject, momentarily speechless, and causes this same, nominally sane man to state, with apparent conviction, that an imaginary being “lives” in the Lafayette Cemetery.

Where Hollywood has erred, I think, is in the casting of such a familiar actor in the role. Vampires in general, and Lestat in particular, get their kick from their alien-ness, from their difference from the mundane. Tom Cruise is too well-known, too famous and too, well, Tom Cruise to achieve the kind of chilling strangeness the role demands.

If seems so sad to me that the studios give so much weight to the opinions of test audiences once their films are made and the money has been spent. Just this once, it would be nice if they’d listen to their audience before the damage is done.

LAURA S. KING

Anaheim

*

And I thought I was the only one offended by the selection of Cruise to play Lestat. Finally someone with sense speaks out. Thank you, Anne Rice!

Cruise, while perfectly able to play the All-American type, is not cut out to play this most ambivalent (in every sense of the word) character. If producer Geffen and director Jordan would get over the grosses of “The Firm” for just one moment, they would see the inherent problems with this gross miscasting.

Lestat is tall and sinewy, French and aristocratic, the owner of a long, blond mane. In other films, these characteristics might be altered, but not in this case. Many of Lestat’s physical characteristics are direct results of his having become a vampire.

The main problem with the casting of Cruise--indeed the casting of any of the “Vampire Chronicles” characters--is that reader identification and affection are unusually high; readers of the “Chronicles” feel that the characters are their friends. Rice is one of the best writers today at visualization. Reading one of her books is like creating a little movie in the mind. And it is highly unlikely that anyone was imagining Cruise as the vampire everyone loves to lust.

Mr. Geffen, Mr. Jordan, the box-office receipts will swell if you follow the book and the characterizations it outlines as faithfully as possible. Trust me.

ADELE BAYLESS

Los Angeles

*

There hasn’t been such bad casting since “The Bonfire of the Vanities,” and I suggest that producer Geffen look at the box office for that one, despite its being based on a best-selling novel, when he says casting is the job of the director, not a public opinion poll.

Perhaps, with Cruise as Lestat, all of Anne Rice’s fans will just stay home and reread “Interview With the Vampire.”

E. M. BECKMAN

North Hollywood

*

I concur, as would anyone with any taste and insight, that the Vampire Lestat must be played by someone with maturity, character, pathos and vulnerability, not a pasty-faced weakling.

What a shame. A marvelous story and movie are being ruined.

MICHAEL H. SUKOFF

Santa Ana

*

Cruise as the Vampire Lestat is inspired. To compliment this brilliance, Jordan and Geffen should consider cameos by Beavis and Butt-head. Heh-heh-heh.

MICHAEL ROBERTS

Twentynine Palms

*

Cruise as Lestat? Why not Bugs Bunny or Sylvester the Cat, and make it a real cartoon?

Tom Cruise--never!

GARY MANNING

Hollywood

[multifandombabesworld]

SOME THINGS ABOUT ME: GET TO KNOW ME

First things first my name is Mary. I prefer you call me that but if you have any cool nicknames or anything like that, you would like to call me please ask. Do not call me anything without my permission first

I go by She/Her/Hers and I am bisexual. I have a preference for girls and I like redheads…random I know but it’s true

I’m 16 years old and I’m a junior in high school

My favorite color is purple and I like black as well

My Hogwarts House is Slytherin

My favorite movie genres are horror, comedy, thriller, and musicals

I’m a theatre kid. My favorite musicals are Hamilton, Annie, Into The Woods, and Heathers

I like different types of music genres. But I mostly listen to Pop, 80s, Rock, & Old Time music (like 50s-60s and even 90s)

I have two cats. A Russian blue named Sophia and an American short hair named Savannah

My top 5 favorite shows are Stranger Things, American Horror Story, Riverdale, The Vampire Diaries, and The Umbrella Academy

My top 5 favorite movies are Beauty and the Beast, Harry Potter, Descendants, Carrie, and IT

I have like a million celebrity crushes…here’s some of them: Evan Peters, Cody Fern, Dove Cameron, Taissa Farmiga, Billie Lourd, Noah Schnapp, Sadie Sink, Florence Pugh, Scarlett Johansson, Sarah Paulson, Tom Holland, Andrew Garfield, Tobey Maguire, Finn Wittrock, and such much more. (Like literally it’s at least a whole fucking twelve pages)

I have an older brother who is 20 years old, and has autism

I’m huge nerd!! (I’m a huge ass nerd when it comes to the shows and movies I like…lol)

I like to read all different types of books. My favorite ones I have read are Carrie, Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Dork Diaries, Whatever After, IT, and anything Stephen King

I have an obsession with anything chocolate and anything with cookies

My favorite cookies are snickerdoodles and sugar cookies

I don’t like dark chocolate or white chocolate that much (I’m more of a milk chocolate gal)

I like to write about different things so send in something. (I write fluff, angst, happy things, cute friend stories, and….sometimes smut. The last one I wrote was two years ago and it was so fucking bad….but yeah…)

And that’s all…..I think….there’s probably more about me but….that’s all I can think of. If you want to suggest anything or ask me something, feel free to message me.

Love you all!! Have a good night/day!! 💕

[intrepid-fool]

RWBY Fanficton Oneshots

A collection of short RWBY fics that I saved and reread time to time.

If you are interested in reading RWBY multichapter fics I made a list (X)

The Ratio of Freckles to Stars by yurImperial

Ruby X Penny watch the stars

Burnout by MidwesternDuchess

Yang has been knocked to her lowest. Qrow and Raven discuss it

Ashes by MidwesternDuchess

Yang gives in to her anger and believes it justified. She has a right to be furious.

Cookies and a Place to Call Home by Liara_90

Weiss sees Pyrrha and Ruby living a happy marriage and muses

Catharsis by MidwesternDuchess

The talk that Yang and Raven should have had

Androids Don’t Dream (And so have no requiems for them) by im_ashamed -

Short story about Penny's fading consciousness

A Talk Worth Having by College Fool

Ruby and Jaune are naive and curious and Blake suffers for it

If you never say the words by thesecretsix

Qrow look after his nieces and talks to Yang about Raven

Figuring Things Out by yurImperial

Penny and Ruby first kiss

the simpler things that you’ve long forgotten by MorteLise

Once upon a time, Remnant’s wicked witch also asked three questions of the genie in the lamp. And the genie revealed to her the great and terrible truth behind the reason for her lost love’s return.

Cumulonimbus by God Emperor Penguin

Jaune and Weiss watch some clouds at Beacon

The Devil has No Strings on Me by God Emperor Penguin

In her last moments, Penny has regrets

Cold Heart by MidwesternDuchess

If Winter is cruel to Weiss, it is out of duty

Happy Meal by God Emperor Penguin

Comedy fic. Cinder feels some strange guilt and shows some charity to poor Jaune. It is not a good time for him.

Extracurricular Activities by Moczo

Comedy Fic about Cinder and her minions at Beacon Academy

A Parent's Darkest Fear by yurImperial

Before Pietro Poledina was introduced. Imagined Penny's father

Pretty Hate Machine II by thesecretsix

AU where Ruby is unable to trust the ones around her and obsesses over Penny Poledina

Auriga by Aetheling

AU where grown up Jaune is the last survivor and continunes to fight Salem in his friend's memory

Will I Dream (of Her)? by Interdimensionalmeatpie

A look into Penny's final moments.