#Close More Deals

[wholesalinghouses]

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[pangur-and-grim]

god video calls have really shown me that I have no facial expressions..... I watched myself say "that's fantastic! that's the best news of my life," with the face of someone waiting in a lobby for a dentist appointment

[uncharted-constellations]

~What i couldve been~

I was just gonna do the adult timeline zelda but im so enchanted by the idea of these two versions of the same character. People always talk about how link would be changed but never zelda.

[iamlostandinneedofcoffee]

I like to imagine that every once in a while Red Hood just goes off comms for long stretches of time and comes back bruised as shit and exhausted before logging off for the night and the rest of bat brigade is trying to figure out which villain of the week keeps jumping him.

Eventually they, cause communication is a skill no one learned, just start harassing hood’s men to find out whose turf they are invading only to find out they thought the bats were beefing with Red again cause he keeps mumbling about brats.

Now they are trying to find out which one of them is lying about fucking with Jason and no one is owning up, the trackers they keep putting on him are fizzling out, no one as any idea and Jason ain’t saying shit. But like he’s never properly irritated about it or asks for help nor can they find anything out so they let it go for now (read keep trying to track him to no avail).

And then one night Red Robin comes across Red getting chased and then fighting off a feral looking teenager on the roofs of Crime Alley and just when he looks like he is getting the upper hand another drops down from above (how the fuck the nearest taller building is not anywhere near close enough to dive into the fight from what the fuck?!?) and joins the brawl.

Tim is about to rush in to help Jason before the two teens’ heads turn in unison to him with Lazarus green eyes and look like cats when they see a red dot. Jason panics and before he can grab them, they leap and now Tim is in a cartoon brawl dust cloud and all and Jason has joined in and is calling them all brats and how his gunna whop their ass- and there is a foot in his mouth.

And yet through it all Tim never feels afraid. In fact, as he fights he realises they are keeping up and beating him all whilst smiling and punning(?!? They must never meet dick SHIT DUCK) and that won’t fucking do, so he brings out all his tools and tricks and is getting matching by two raccoon twins. 20 minutes later they are all grinning bloody smiles and just as he is about to slam his bo staff up into into the female looking twin, a whistle is blown.

They all freeze and look over in unison as if they all became shining quadruplets at a giant shit house built fucking man. And like Tim has seen big men. Bane is a big mother fucker. Superman is a big mother fucker, and is also shaped like one. Bats is big but this guy even though his is maybe not as large he feels infinitely more terrifying and that’s before you get to the flaming(fucking literally, how does that even work or stay in the pony tail) white hair.

“Alright enough for tonight or foods gunna go cold. Inside.” A voice bellows across the roof before the man disappears??!? At the mention of food the one top of Tim almost starts drooling, gets up and starts dragging Tim’s still prone body across the roof and off of it OH FUCK AND INTO A WALL WHA and they went through it… well

A couple second later Jason and the other dude stumble in. Jason picks Tim up as he is coming down from that mini adrenaline rush at and puts a arm around Tim, half hug half chokehold, saying “say nothing and you get to join once a week. Say shit and you’re haunted.” And walks off to the kitchen and starts bringing out food.

… safe to say the rest of the bats are now confused why Tim of all people is now turning up bruised as well with Jason, cause if it was him to start why has he started loosing all of a sudden??? And he says fuck all but his weapons and fighting style has got more chaotic and terrifying.

Oh and he seems to be eating… well you win some and lose some

[nenoname]

stan ignoring mysteries and weirdness for 30 years balancing out his family's innate curiosity and being why the blind eye ignored him for that long

[lurkerdemon]

Random DP x DC Thought #9:

The fight was desperately going on against the villains near a newly located Lazarus Pit, but despite the heroes best efforts they couldn't prevent one of their own suffering a fatal injury.

Per usual desperation to avoid having to go through life with that loss, the dead person is placed into the Lazarus Pit for revival. (The cost of a bout of possible madness could be dealt with, and at the very least it would remove another one of the pits from the world).

Except this time when the revived person comes back out of the waters, the Lazarus Pit doesn't leave. Shrinks certainly, but still roils and churns before a large, glowing creature with white fur looms over all those gathered. Their blue cape flutters slightly as it floats up above the waters.

"Greetings, I am Frostbite of the Far Frozen. I have come to request-"

A head of white hair and glowing green eyes pops up from behind the being's shoulder.

"STOP THROWING SO MANY PATIENTS INTO PORTALS! YOU'RE STRESSING OUT THE YETIS!"

[tabooiart]

this hot pink bitch was named breakfast!!!

[creative-clawmarks]

Love for the dead is called grief.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

KO-FI

[hatsunevita]

this is literally one of my favorite panels of the war arc.

i am OBSESSED with deku’s perception of romance and how it’s probably based off popular melodramas and his peers’ stories about their dates.

because you can’t argue with me that that’s the reason why he will have no idea his and katsuki’s relationship is so close to romantic. i’m so sure he’s gonna be the last one to realise his feelings for katsuki aren’t purely friendly and platonic. the guy will be like “oh yeah we’re really close and i care about him deeply and i hate the very thought of him being hurt and i wanna spend the rest of my life next to kacchan but haha that’s just our friendship! we’re not holding hands and sharing crepes so there are no romantic feelings involved🥰”

bro is gonna be so shocked when kacchan finally confesses his true feelings.

[adragonthatwrites]

Shen Qingqiu as a Naga thoughts continued (Part 1)

At first Liu Qingge doesn't know what to do, which is very much a first for him. He's been in the business of Monster Pest Control for years and this is the first time he's found himself frozen in the face of a beast.

On the bright side the Naga hasn't made any move towards him either, even though he's seen it and it undoubtedly knows he's seen it; they're looking right at each other.

Eventually, Liu Qingge works up the nerves to start slowly backing away, one careful step at a time. He hopes, however stupidly, for a moment that he can just back his way out of this and turn around and leave the territory without further incident.

This hope dies a sad, sad dead as the Naga starts moving in response. Liu Qingge is a trained professional and damn good at his job at that, so he does not panic. His heart is beating against his ribs like a terrified bird but he remains outwardly calm and collected as the Naga slowly unspools from its hiding place, slithering out into the clearing and seemingly following him in his retreat.

His conclusion from the shed skin was correct; it's fully grown. Not a Constrictor type; wrong patterning, and huge though it is he knows those fuckers can get big enough to swallow dragons. This one isn't quite to that size, though its torso alone easily dwarfs his own.

It; he, it's a male; has shimmering green scales; darker on the back, slowly fading into a soft teal green along the underbelly. They shine in the sunlight, reflecting like gemstones in places. The Naga has dark hair, pulled partially up away from his face but otherwise allowed to spill about his shoulders.

His eyes are trained with incredible intent upon Liu Qingge, tongue flicking out every so often to taste the air and coils whispering softly over forest floor as it draws closer to him.

The distance between them is shortening, and Liu Qingge is rapidly running out of ideas for how to get out of this (not that he was coming up with many aside from Back Away Slowly)

Then Liu Qingge steps on a stick, and a loud crack rings through the air. The Naga suddenly freezes, eyes going wider and coils pulling tight. And Liu Qingge, like a fucking idiot, turns around and runs.

He makes it about five paces before something huge is crashing into him. Claws hands meet his back and wrap about his shoulders and then he's spinning, rolling over as coils come forth to wrap about him and secure him tight in their hold. Next thing he knows he's caught tight in the embrace of the Naga, smooth scales pressed against him from all sides and a pair of shining green eyes peering curiously at him from less a palm's width away.

[demaparbat-hp]

Almost

[journal-from-the-heart]

i think, for trauma survivors, especially those who were emotionally abused, invalidated, or gaslit, it is really important not to underestimate the significance of speaking bluntly about what happened to you. Forcing yourself not to beat around the bush, not to downplay what you went through with your words. say what happened, without any caveats, without any “but it could’ve been worse”, “but i might just be being overdramatic”, “but it wasn’t really THAT bad,” and so forth. sit with the discomfort until you can begin to let yourself realize that it WAS that bad, you WERENT being overdramatic, and even if it could’ve been worse you still didn’t deserve it. It’s almost like a form of reclamation, taking back your memories, taking back your life, even the difficult or gross parts, and refusing to let anyone change the narrative or tell you how you should feel anymore, even yourself. and it hurts and it’s scary and it feels weird and awkward and sometimes you want to convince yourself you’re lying, but i think sitting in those weird feelings and letting yourself admit that you really did go through trauma puts the power back in your hands to process things and be compassionate to yourself while you heal

[peace-hunter]

tfone au where OP is created as the last of the primes but way after them, a sparkling born at what were thought to be the last days of the war against the quintessons, the beginning of a new generation of peace after eons of war. a child meant to be loved and raised knowing nothing of war nor sacrifice.

he's kept mostly out of the spotlight by his siblings, who don't wish to expose him to everyone's optics so young, and want to wait until the war is done and over to properly introduce him to their people.

except of course the primes are betrayed and murdered by sentinel, the war is lost and everyone who knows and cared for the truth is either banished or outright killed in order to suppress it.

and the high guard, the ones the primes trusted the most, the ones that were supposed to protect them, the ones who failed in their most important duty, have to make a choice. to take the last prime, their last hope, with them to the surface, a hostile environment where there's little to no supplies and where they'll be hunted down by both sentinel and the quintessons as the biggest threat to their regimen.

or hide him in plain sight. place him where sentinel won't think to look for him. one more sparkling among many. and hope it will be enough to keep him alive. pray to primus that he'll protect his last child long enough for them to come back for him when it's safer (even if most of them have already lost their faith on him when he allowed the rest of his children to be massacred like that)

they almost lose their resolve when they realize they will have to take the little one's cog away in order to make him blend in with the rest of the newborns (and oh do they burn with murderous intent when they see what sentinel has done to their people but it's not the time yet-) but in the end they decide an impaired little prime is better than a dead one.

and so in the chaos of thirteen dead primes and a sudden energon crisis, a little sparkling who very few mechs really knew about and even fewer had seen completely vanishes. and in the depths of iacon a mech in charge of a new batch of newborns scratches their helm in confusion as they realize they must have miscounted the first time.

optimus prime is quietly erased from any official records by sentinel, written off as dead when they find a sparkling's frame mangled beyond recognition after an attack on the base of those rebels that insist on being a thorn on his side. killing the sparkling hadn't been precisely in his plans, he probably could've found some use for it after all, but he's not particularly upset about it either.

and orion pax grows up with an ache on his spark that tells him he's missing something far more important than a t-cog and dreams of gentle and loving hands, cradling him against the frames of mechs he cannot recall the faces of.

[cecoeur]

it's hell on earth to be heavenly them's the breaks, they don't come gently

[ficandkaboodle]

Someone (I don’t remember Whomst but please do raise your hand if it was you) once proposed the idea that Terzo might be a bit of a pianist based off of this image

And I just wanted to say that I support this idea. Not only because I think Terzo being able to play piano is adorable, but because it would make the Kazoo of Destiny even funnier in my eyes.

Dude is a classically-trained concert pianist, would make so many of his peers swoon by doing that dumb “Oh is that a piano? Don’t mind if I do~” bit and playing a concerto off the cuff. He could easily wriggle in a piano bit for himself during rituals and acoustic sessions — and the Clergy would’ve been on board for once because they know the power that a confident, handsome man with strong fingers can wield on an already horny audience.

But nope: He toot his lil kazoo, his favorite party favor he got three years ago at a New Year’s Eve party.

[celestialbruise]

PIDW time travel fic where after dying Shen Jiu wakes up in the past, after the ling xi caves and his subsequent qi deviation, with a chance to change his fate. Bingge also wakes up in his fourteen year old body, memories fully intact. Now, instead of actually changing their ways Bingjiu just try to kill each other in increasingly violent, hilarious ways