#Carter in the Cult

[nny11writes]

Accidental Six Sentence Sunday because I made myself sad so now you get to suffer with me

CW: Suicidal Ideation CW: Suicide note

Catra, as per usual, is not having a great time. This is also a, uh, just a-HEM just a little tiny bit longer than 6 sentences. Don't worry about it don't worry about it don't worry about it, this is fine! :) I will find the perfect place for this :)

This has nothing to do with Carter in the Cult. This sentence is designed to torture one or two of you specifically.

Don't worry about it :)

My dedication to self destruction should be applauded. 

None of the rest of you have found a way to kill me yet, but at the rate I’m going I’ve found it for you. So, you’re welcome! I’ll do the hard work and the dirty work, and you can stand there to shake your head sadly and say shit like:

“She’s in a better place now.”

“At least she isn’t suffering anymore.”

“I knew she was unwell, but…”

“It’s actually a relief to not have to worry about her anymore.”

And you’ll post your sorry online brownie point stories about me and the times you tried to help me, but gosh I was just so fucking far gone if only you could’ve done more. You’ll end it telling the people you actually care about “if you are ever feeling this way please reach out to me!” and you’ll post the number to a hotline that will call the cops on any poor fucker who calls it. 

And you’ll feel better. You will feel better.

That’s what it’s all about right? I’m a nuisance, a pest, a nightmare. You can’t stand me at my best or worst, you think I’m a bitch, you think I’m scum. You tell your friends to avoid me because “oh that Catra is a bad one, just likes drama”. Just likes drama, your judgment from on high where you push back and sometimes push first but sure I love the “drama” of it all. Or maybe your friends just said that for you, and you let them puppet you about; afraid to speak up.

Well, it doesn’t matter much I suppose.

When I’m gone you’ll feel bad, but not in a way that will change you. Just enough to want to get rid of it as quickly as you got rid of me, so you make your post and have an outpouring of support from well wishers and people who wished they could’ve seen the signs.

I mean, I made each sign with sweat and tears and blood, I bent the glass tubes carefully and turned them on in neon red and green.

You saw the signs.

You just hoped they wouldn’t mean what you feared they could, and the worst part is I don’t know if you feared it because you actually cared about me or if you feared the cleanup and guilt you knew would come. Always have to make things right after all, always have to clean up my messes. If you can’t control me, you want to control the aftermath and the first step of that is to make it all about you, right?

Well don’t worry about it. It’s not your problem. I’m absolving you of that guilt, this wasn’t your fault.

I made my mistakes, and now I have to live with them, right?

As if I haven’t spent my whole life living with this. Struggling against it. Pushing the weight up for moments at a time to gasp in air before it crushed me again. (Do you remember when you used to hold me and promise I didn’t deserve that kind of misery? I do. I miss the you that believed in me, but I guess that’s my fault too.) I’ve lived with it and like everything else in my life, it just isn’t worth it. Nothing is worth it anymore,.not since you   

Listen to your friends now. They’re better than me, smarter than me, kinder than me. They never liked me and they might’ve been on to something. When they tell you that it’s not your fault, it’s true. When they tell you I was unstable, it’s true. When they tell you this was inevitable, well, I think that’s true too.

Third try’s the charm right?

…

Well. Wish me luck, and do me a favor- I know I don’t deserve one, but do me one last favor.

When the mortuary asks who will pick up my remains? Leave them there. They cremate the unclaimed and I can sit in a dusty box in the basement, and when enough time passes maybe I’ll get lucky and they’ll throw me away with the rest of the trash. Don’t keep me on your desk to mourn, I don’t want you to cry over me. 

I want me gone. You should too.

So do me a favor and don’t claim me. Choose yourself for fucking once.

Trust me, you’ll thank me later.

[fightclublog]

Fight Club (1999) Movie Stills

[culthermag]

Lil’ Wayne photographed by Sarah A. Friedman during a Tha Carter Ill recording sessions, for Vibe Magazine’s August issue. [ 2007 ] — [ x ]

[forgettablebrat]

Fight club (1999)

[theothermorganh]

The real reason Webber is in my cult.

edit: ignore the two "already" I am a dumbass

[catcultcafe]

I need to hear what all characters would dress up as for Halloween!!!

Ignore how weird Green looks for a second. And how late this is.... Except it's not late because it's always spooky time.

Vent under cut

Real talk I've been really over whelmed recently with trying to balance everything in my life. School, posting, writing, and making my games it's all too much, the way I'm currently handling everything... I'm going to try slowing things down. I can only work on a daily or weekly schedule. So since anytime I try to post daily I slowly die, I'm going to try posting 1 thing weekly on any of my accounts. That may not feel like a lot and I may occasionally post an extra every now and then. Tbh the art isn't the block in posting. It's scanning the art and actually posting it. It makes me incredibly anxious and it takes a whole different load of dopamine to do and I only have so much a day. I apologize but this does mean that posting specifically here will be irregular since it will be spread out between my accounts based on what I've made and what I feel like. Have a lovely day <3

[blissfulwoes]

[askchuckandtiff]

Chucky should fr let glen and Glenda do his makeup 😊

"absolutely not."

[areyou-talkin-to-me]

Fight Club

At first i didn't get it. Then i got it.

🔗 IMDB

[pokcster]

"Without pain, without sacrifice we would have nothing."

https://www.instagram.com/pokcster/

[harrison-abbott]

Did you know ...

In the film Fight Club, David Fincher placed at least one cup of Starbucks in every scene.

As an ode to the theme of consumerism throughout the movie. 

[yorunoangel]

I don't know if providing context for this picture will make it any less ridiculous but let's just say @jake-marshall and I are cooking something up :p

[fightclublog]

CHOOSE YOUR PLAYER

[filmfanaticfables1990]

Fight Club (1999)

"Welcome to Fight Club. The first rule of Fight Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club. The second rule of Fight Club is: You do not talk about Fight Club."

Fight Club is a mind-bending psychological thriller directed by David Fincher, based on the novel by Chuck Palahniuk. The film stars Edward Norton as an unnamed narrator who is disillusioned with his white-collar job and consumer-driven life. He forms an underground fight club with the enigmatic Tyler Durden, played by Brad Pitt. As the club grows, it evolves into something far more dangerous and anarchic, challenging the very fabric of society. Helena Bonham Carter co-stars as Marla Singer, a woman who becomes entangled in their chaotic world. The film explores themes of identity, masculinity, and the destructive nature of consumerism.

Why You Should Watch?

Brad Pitt and Edward Norton deliver unforgettable performances.

Directed by the brilliant David Fincher.

A thought-provoking and visually stunning film.

Explores deep themes of identity and societal norms.

A cult classic that has left a lasting impact on pop culture.

Favorite Quotes

"It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything."

"I am Jack's smirking revenge."

"You met me at a very strange time in my life."

[amberpriceenthusiast]

Can and will relate bayside to all of the things I like

“If memory serves me correct, I gave you all, you gave me less”

What if I said Terry about Carter. What then.

[schlock-luster-video]

On June 6, 2000, Fight Club was released on DVD in the United States.