#Captain smek

[marcmarcmomarc]

Miraculous

Chapter 11: Lila’s Evildoing

(In Paris, Lila stares out her window. Mrs. Rossi comes in.)

MRS. ROSSI: Hey, Lila.

(Lila doesn’t look at her.)

MRS. ROSSI: I know you’ve been dishonest with me about so much. And I think it’s important that we talk about it.

LILA: I suppose, but not now.

MRS. ROSSI: I see. I’ve gotta go. Ciao, mi bella.

(Mrs. Rossi leaves. Lila glances back, then smirks. She jumps out of her window to the street right outside her house. Later, she arrives at an alley.)

LILA: Alright. Whoever you guys are, you can come out now.

(Evelyn Deavor, Morag, Smek, Velvet, Shelbourne, Henry J. Waternoose, Randall Boggs, Johnny Worthington, Victor “Vector” Perkins, Eduardo “El Macho” Perez, Balthazar Bratt, Scarlet and Herb Overkill, the Vicious Six, and Bela step out of the shadows.)

LILA: Ah, fellow villains, I see?

EVELYN: I’m Evelyn Deavor. My do-good brother created DEVTech and brought Supers back into the light. I attempted to keep them illegal by making them look bad with hypnotism. My alter-ego was the Screenslaver.

MORAG: I’m Morag. I was the rightful ruler of Scotland, and then the Loud family ruined it for me!

SMEK: I am Smek. I was captain of the Boov race until Oh became the first Boov to run toward the danger, toward a Gorg ship, and took over.

VELVET: I’m Velvet. My brother and I were music stars who used Trolls to boost our singing, until that little scab Queen Poppy and her boyfriend exposed us and got us arrested!

SHELBOURNE: I’m Shelbourne. I was the mayor of Swallow Falls. But then Flint Lockwood and his food machine saved the town.

WATERNOOSE: I’m Henry J. Waternoose. I was the CEO of Monsters, Incorporated, before James P. Sullivan exposed that I would kidnap a thousand children and extract their screams to keep Monstropolis’ power running before I’d let the company die.

RANDALL: I’m Randall Boggs. The second-best Scarer in the business. So close behind Sullivan. I also made the Scream Extractor to assist Waternoose’s scheme.

JOHNNY: I am Johnny Worthington III, president of Roar Omega Roar. Boggs and I attempted to work together to make Laugh Power look bad to stick it to Sullivan. Unfortunately, my assistant ratted us out.

VECTOR: I’m Victor Perkins. I call myself Vector. After I stole the Pyramid of Giza, Gru tried to one-up me by stealing the moon.

EL MACHO: Yo soy Eduardo Perez, aka El Macho. I once worked with Agent Gru’s scientist to make indestructible killing machines out of his Minions.

BRATT: I’m Balthazar Bratt. I was a star on an 80’s TV show, Evil Bratt. But then Hollywood rejected me once I hit puberty and had a growth spurt.

MAXIME: I am Maxime Le Mal. I’ve wanted to get my revenge on Gru since he upstaged me at the school talent show.

VALENTINA: I’m his girlfriend, Valentina.

SCARLET: I am Scarlet Overkill, the world’s first female supervillain. I wanted to overthrow England and have the crown for myself, but the Minions betrayed me.

HERB: I’m Scarlet’s husband and master of gadgetry, Herb.

BELLE: I’m Belle Bottom. Leader of the Vicious Six.

JEAN-CLAWED: Jean-Clawed.

SVENGEANCE: Svengeance.

STRONGHOLD: Stronghold.

NUN-CHUCK: And Nun-Chuck.

LILA: Isn’t that only five of you?

BELLE: Wild Knuckles. He was our leader, before we abandoned him.

BELA: I am Bela. Normally, I don’t work with humans, but any enemy of Dupain-Cheng is an ally of mine.

AUSTIN: And I’m Austin Holden, aka ASLB247. I once tried to reveal Ladybug and Cat Noir’s identities at a panel and was humiliated by them for it.

(Meanwhile, Hawk Moth’s lair window opens.)

HAWK MOTH: Ooh. An embarrassed fan who wishes to reveal Ladybug and Cat Noir? Easy akuma prey.

(A white butterfly lands in his open hand. He turns it into an akuma and sends it out.)

HAWK MOTH: Fly away, my little akuma, and evilize him!

(The akuma flutters over the city and eventually reaches Austin’s sword.)

LILA: Check it out, Austin. An akuma.

AUSTIN: Hawk Moth, I am Austin Holden. Ladybug and Cat Noir’s Miraculous you want? Their Miraculous you’ll get.

HAWK MOTH: And you will be able to track them down as The Huntsman.

(The purple akuma smoke engulfs him, then dissipates, revealing him now wearing his Huntsman cosplay.)

LILA: Ooh, cool look. Villains, round out!

(The villains surround Lila, having elected her as their undisputed leader.)

LILA: We are gonna fight hard for this territory and it’s ours. But with these mouth-breathing fools serving as cover, we won’t get it.

SMEK: As of now, Adrien and his group have already tried one attempt to get Marinette back. They are in the midst of making another, but no matter how much they try, she’ll never be convinced.

LILA: Nice. Meanwhile, we’re here about to make this city our own. Small turf, I know, but it’s all we’ve got. I wanna hold this city like we always held it. With skin! I say I want us evil folk to sail, to hold the sky!

VECTOR: Then rev us off. Voom-va voom!

VELVET: Chung-chung!

RANDALL: Cracko, jacko!

EVELYN: Pam-pam!

BRATT: Riga-diga-dum!

LILA: OK, fellas, we’re taking this city!

LILA: (SINGING) When you’re evil, you’re evil all the way From your first felony ‘till your last dying day When you’re evil, let them do what they can You’ve got brothers around, you’re a family man You’re never alone, you’re never disconnected You’re home with your own when company’s expected, you’re well protected Then you are set with a capital V Which you’ll never forget, like the birds and the bees When you’re evil, you stay evil

LILA: Now, contrary to Smek, I’m taking a wild step in the dark that Marinette will be back eventually, but by then, we’ll have taken over. Too late for them.

SHELBOURNE: Of course.

EL MACHO: So what is your idea?

VELVET: It won’t be easy taking this city over.

LILA: No sweat. You guys are some of the strongest villains in the multiverse, and these guys give in to anything. Just scare them and you’re on top.

HUNTSMAN: Great!

MORAG: Then this will be good.

BRATT: Operation Take Over Paris begins!

VECTOR: Oh, yeah!

RANDALL: When you’re evil, you are most feared in town You’re the gold medal champ with a heavyweight crown

EVELYN: When you’re evil, you’re the swingin’-est thing Little boy, you’re a man, little man, you’re a king

VILLAINS: The villains are in gear, our cylinders are clicking Those freaks will steer clear, ‘cause every Parisian’s a lousy chicken

(They walk through the city, scaring civilians as they go.)

VILLAINS: Here come the villains, like a bat out of Hell Someone gets in our way, someone don’t feel so well We are villains, little world, step aside Better go underground, better run, better hide We’re drawing the line, so keep your noses hidden We’re hanging a sign, says, “Visitors forbidden”, and we ain’t kidding Here come the villains, and we’re gonna beat every last peasant on these dirty bugging streets Each peasant on these dirty bugging streets

LILA: Alright, villains, let’s get to work!

[kissy-leechie-blog]

Smoochies for Smeky!

🎶 "I'm in heaven when you kiss me. show me how you miss me. Take me with you back to wonderland. I'm in heaven when you kiss me. Show me how you miss me. Take me with you back to wonderland. You captured me with a stare. I follow you everywhere. You lead me in temptation." 🎵

Published Date: September 18th, 2023

[michealbff]

Gay cuz I said and I want to add me holding a trans flag

[aidens-ocean-galaxy]

captain smek is such a hear me out

like, smash

[acanvasofabillionsuns]

[ID: The first image is a movie poster for the Dreamworks movie Home, showing Oh, a Boov (a wide, short, purple creature), Tip, a black girl, and a calico cat. The rest of the images are screenshots of sections of The True Meaning of Smekday, by Adam Rex.

In a ridiculously short amount of time, the Boov determined that humans were unwilling to mix peacefully into their culture. They pointed out all the people who fled instead of welcoming their new neighbors, even those whose homes had been taken outright. Captain Smek himself appeared on television for an official speech to humankind. (He didn't call us humankind, of course. He called us Noble Savages of Earth. Apparently we were all still living on Earth at this point.) "Noble Savages of Earth," he said. "Long time have we tried to live together in peace." (It had been five months.) "Long time have the Boov suffered under the hostileness and intolerableness of you people. With sad hearts I now concede that Boov and humans will never to exist as one." I remember being really excited at this point. Could I possibly be hearing right? Were the Boov about to leave? I was so stupid. "And so now I generously grant you Human Preserves—gifts of land that will be for humans forever, never to be taken away again, now." I stared at the TV, mouth agape. "But we were here first," I said pathetically.

The tent was strung with white Christmas lights and packed with people, all facing a stage on one end. And on the stage stood a redheaded man in a wifebeater with a Viking tattooed on his chest. People were booing him. "Shut up!" the redhead was saying. "I have the stage! All I'm saying is, now that we've all had to leave our real homes, we got a chance to get America right! There can be a place for the Saxon Americans, and a place for the coloreds, and a place for—shut up!"

"So every place has some kind of leader?" I asked. It had all happened so fast. "Sure. Most of them are former state governors, or senators, or whatever. The president runs a little town called Rye." "Just a little town?" "Yes..." said Mitch. "He's not very popular anymore, because of the invasion. People assume it was his fault somehow. But we have to have leaders. We have to have government." "I guess," I said. "Daniel Landry's district is far south of here," he said, "on some former Indian land." "Indian land? Like a reservation?" "That's right." "Is this Dan guy an Indian?" "I don't think so, no. I'm pretty sure he's white. He wasn't a governor or anything before, but he's really rich, so I imagine he's a good leader." "Uh-huh. But he's white," I said. "The Indians elected a white guy?" "Well...I don't know. I imagine all the other people elected him. It's mostly white folks living on the reservation now." I frowned. "And the Indians are okay with this?" "What do you mean?" "Well...it was a reservation," I said. "It was land we promised to the Native Americans. Forever." Mitch looked at me like I was speaking in tongues. "But...we needed it," he said.

"Mr. Hinkel," said the Chief, jerking his head toward the sleeping man. "He thinks Indians like me ought to live somewhere else. Likes to tell me about it a lot." I didn't really want to talk about Mr. Hinkel. "Well, maybe they'll let him go soon." "Doubt it," said the Chief. "Got beat up pretty good by someone who thinks gay people like him ought to live somewhere else."

The last excerpt from the book is in comic format, divided into four main panels. The first is captioned, "2,000 (two thousand) years ago - Many schools closed by the HighBoov, because Money is Needed Elsewhere. Boov are told not to worry about learning unimportant things. Boov are told to learn one useful thing that may be done over and over again and give their life meaning. HighBoov devise clever tests to find which Boov should be taught more, and which Boov should not be taught because Money is Needed Elsewhere." Boov are shown doing things like guarding, serving food, and taking care of children.

The second panel is captioned, "1,150 (one thousand, one hundred and fifty) years ago - Certain Boov who were taught many things announce that industry is polluting the waters of Boovworld." Boov in uniforms point to a chart of their world and gesture to something outside a window, presenting this information to other Boov in fancy outfits. "These scientist predict that the oceans soon will no longer be able to sustain life, unless things are changed."

The third panel is captioned, "1,149 (one thousand, one hundred and forty-nine) years ago - HighBoov declare that these warnings of pollution cannot be proven, so therefore nothing should be changed. The scientist Boov who gave these warnings are declared evil-evil that they should call our God unclean. These Boov are named the Forgotten and sent onto land into exile forever. Some of them die of asphyxiation. Most don't." A line of Boov trudge out of water onto land.

The fourth panel is captioned, "1,003 (one thousand and three) years ago - God dies of asphyxiation." There are many skeletons with lots of darkness in the background.

Plain text: "1,003 years ago, God dies of asphyxiation" End ID]

like the most politically neutered movie of all time unironically

[lil-pink-coupe]

do you still have the boovs :3

I love home and saw your Boov stuff it’s nice

✨

Why, thank you! “Home” is one of my favorite Dreamworks movies, too! 😃

And yes, I still have my plushies of Oh and Captain Smek! 👾💖

[wordswithkittywitch]

A sketch comic done around 2012. After twelve years and typing up the image ID, I feel it is much less funny than I did when I drew it.

Image ID under cut:

Pencil sketches of characters from Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Data and Ard'rain from the episode The Ensigns of Command. Ard'rain embraces Data awkwardly. There is an arrow pointing to them with the caption: "This part is canon".

Ard'rain kisses Data with the sound effect *smek*. There is an arrow pointing to Data with the caption: "confused android".

Separated, Data looks at Ard'rain with confusion.

Data: What was that for?

Ard'rain: You appeared to need it.

Data: Among humans, a kiss usually serves to seal a friendship, or indicate support, attraction, affection. In this context, I must assume that your intention was to express support.

Later, Data stands in front of Picard's desk in the ready room, while Picard looks at something with annoyance.

Data: You seem troubled, sir. Query: Do you need it, captain?

Picard looks cross.

Ct. Picard: Do I need what, commander?

Data leans across the desk and kisses Picard on the cheek. The sound effect *smek* also accompanies this, along with an arrow pointing to Picard with the caption, "Confused captain."

Ct. Picard looks unflapped.

Ct. Picard: That is insubordinate. Never do that again.

Data: Curious. Lieutenant Yarr had a similar reaction. Perhaps it is me.

I think the caption "This part is canon. This part is not." was a reference to the line "That was the stun setting. This is not." from the same episode. But I drew this twelve years ago and I can't be sure.

[marlinspirkhall]

Summary: Kirk wakes up to an empty bed, sad that Spock has already gone on shift, but Spock returns to surprise him.

[Image ID] Page 01: A black background surrounded by illustrated stars. Text: Title: Nocturnal Text: Marlinspirkhall, illustrated by Sweet-Sugarcubbe

PAGE 02: Digital illustrations in black and white. The Enterprise flies through space. Kirk wakes up, looks out of the window, and turns to see an empty bed. Clock on bedside table reads 05:47. Zoom out. Kirk is sitting in an empy room. Text: Dating a guy who's practically nocturnal has its drawbacks. [/text]

Page 03: Kirk pours coffee, steam spills across the page. Text: It has its perks, too.. [/text] Kirk stares at the mirror and looks sadly at Spock's toothbrush in their shared toothbrush cup. Text: But this is definitely one of the drawbacks. [/text] Page 04: Kirk is sitting at a table with a coffee feeling sorry for himself. He looks sadly at a cat sitting on the desk. The cat says "mau", and Kirk sighs.

PAGE 05: A door opens. Colour: The comic begins to be drawn in sepia tones. Text: *SLIIID* [/text] Kirk looks around as Spock steps through the door. Zoom on Spock. Text: Spock: "Ashayam--"

PAGE 06: Text: Spock: You are awake. Kirk: I couldn't sleep. Neither, it seems, could you. Spock: There was an incident in the science lab.

PAGE 07: Spock kisses Kirk on the forehead. The illustration is surrounded by stars and love hearts. Text: Smek smek. Spock touches Kirk's face. Text: Kirk l: You-- have too many duties on this ship. Kirk: Maybe the Captain can do something about it. Spock: Maybe he can.

PAGE 08: Spock: We should return to bed He leads Kirk by the hand. Text: Kirk: We won't get much sleep.

PAGE 09: Kirk: We only have an hour before we have to get up again. Spock pulls Kirk into a hug and buries his face in his neck. Spock: Sleep was not my intention. Kirk: ... Oh. [End image ID]

[Plain Text Vers]

See also: [A Million Things To Want] [Cover]

“Noctunal” Spirk comic for the Star Trek Terms of Service Fanzine!🌌🌈

I briNG TO YOU thIs

Written by the incredibly talented and always epic @marlinspirkhall who let me be the illustrator for their amazing comic idea!

It was lovely working with them. Their ideas never cease to inspire me and I’m very grateful for their trust in my interpretation of the story~✨💕

If you haven’t seen the other works of my fellow artists you should definitely check them out! ✨👀

@sttermsofservice

[thedogwhoisachair]

Why did I make this

[kissy-leechie-blog]

Whispering "the nothings of sweets" 💞 First (or second?) ship drawing of these two! Smek (or currently referred to as DJ Smek) whispers into the exhausted captain's listening pours after a full hour of dancing. The pair had decided to leave, then ride back to earth from the moon. It's unknown of what Smek said, but given by Oh's reaction, it could've been some romantic sayings (and nothing explicit, I hope). Whatever it was said, it made Oh happy. Therefore, it made me happy. 😊💞 > Note: Smek's vest/outfit was inspired by his design from the books, which is why it looks different from it's movie design! ✨️

Published Date: August 7th, 2023

[michealbff]

Who else remembers this ship <3 (it’s not my birthday)

[totallynotafishthatdbesilly]

Thanks @oholycatgod

George from stardew valley:

And Captain smek from home:

@kye-865 @virtualunease @mourning-vampire

TAG GAME: two fictional characters that make you go "omg it's me!"

randy meeks (scream)

charlie walker (scream 4)

tagging: @taintandviolent @fear-is-truth @am3ricanh0rrorwh0re @marchsfreakshow @slutforgarlogan @slvt4jamesmarch @lacucarachapisser

[duckulamoved]

Goodnight, sweet prince.

[coupesplushfriends]

TFW your look is on point. 💖

[toad-in-a-trenchcoat]

exactly how it would go down lol

I wanted to do the Draw the Squad challenge.

Lol, Kyle and Sharzod scaring Oh thinking Smek has some kind of weapon.