#Cadet life insights

[manasastuff-blog]

Daily Routine of Cadet National Defence Academy#nda#daily#routine#trending#national#defence Dive into the Daily Routine of Cadet National Defence Academy and uncover what a typical day looks like for aspiring defense professionals. This video takes you through the rigorous schedule, training regimens, and unique experiences of cadets. Whether you're considering a career in the National Defence Academy or just curious about military life, this detailed breakdown will provide insights and answers. Join us as we explore the demanding yet rewarding life inside one of India’s premier defense institutions. Don’t miss out on this exclusive look into the daily discipline and dedication that shapes future leaders!

Call:7799799221

Website:www.manasadefenceacademy.com

#DailyRoutine, #CadetLife, #NationalDefenceAcademy, #MilitaryTraining, #DefenseCareer, #AcademyLife, #CadetRoutine, #IndianArmy, #NDA, #MilitaryAcademy

[everythingseasoning]

How the AOT men love you (SFW & slight NSFW).. PT 1

MINORS: Please DNI. Further reading means you consent to reading everything here, though it's pretty vanilla tbh.

EREN - A bit rough around the edges regarding emotional intimacy. Don't get me wrong, he definitely will straight up tell you "I love you so much, y/n," -- he's not afraid of saying what he feels. However, because he isn't as reflective and insightful and calm as Armin is (Eren's a little more simple-minded), he isn't a guy who does fluffy stuff all the time. He's more about action and adventure -- always pulling you into the next great thing.

*NEEDS* you to be safe, and happy. He will only feel satisfied if you're doing okay. Man cares about you, more than anything else.

Oh .. oh, Eren is definitely very blunt, and stubborn. He sees things in his own way, and it's hard to convince him to back down on anything he's got his mind set to. However, the flip side of this, is that he is fiercely caring, and righteous. Will protect you at all costs, even for little things: Some as*hole at the grocery store cut you off in line and you almost fell to the ground? Eren has a hand on your back and waist, steadying you, before he storms up to the man with the DARKEST look of determined hatred. This man has ZERO chill. (and we love him for it).

You are the most important thing in the world to him. He loves you so intensely and passionately that you won't have a chance to ever doubt it.

Fluff 1) You and Eren like to go on walks/runs together. Sometimes you two have races. Eren always wins (the little b*tch--) or ends up slinging you across his shoulder while running, the biggest smile on both of your faces as you two enjoy the rush of being with each other, and life. Life with Eren is just so right, exciting, and full of good times.

Fluff 2) Just how many beautiful waterfalls have you seen with Eren? You've even hiked a purple-flower covered mountain with him! And you've both tried many wild fruits, from the strange oblong shaped ones to pretty yellow star shaped ones-- Usually you were the one to notice the fruit while Eren glanced giddily all around the forest canopy and ground. It was tradition that whenever you two discovered another fruit plant/tree, Eren opens up the Wild Fruits and Plants You Can Eat book, gifted to you by Armin ("So that Eren doesn't accidentally eat something poisonous.") Sometimes Eren is not as bouncy with energy when you two explore the world, and instead he will hold your hand as you two stroll casually, cuddling up on each other's warmth.

NSFW 1) Eren isn't afraid to just.. straight up ask you.. when he wants it. He will look you up and down, eyes full of hunger. "I want you. How 'bout you?" Whewwww. 😮‍💨

LEVI - ohh boy i have so much to say about this little dude...

Would go absolutely crazy and turn into a battle demon, if he saw the love of his life in danger. ...

If Levi somehow found the right somebody, and actually spent enough time with them to be in a relationship, he would NEED his partner to be safe. He will not risk losing you-- he won't. Not after Isabel and Farlan..not again. So if you're ever in danger, you will see an overpowered beast emerge from that man's body and soul.

Levi isn't the best at emotional intimacy, is very stiff when it comes to words of affirmation. He hadn't ever really thought about love. He never even thought he'd have the option to be safe physically, let alone be safe emotionally. --But when he does meet that person, they light up his life in ways that just stun him. They feel like a summer's glow. He will look 10 years younger with you by his side, will feel unprecedented relief whenever he goes back to you. Will scare all the cadets because he will have this stupid smile on his face whenever he sees you.

--But Levi is not used to being loved deeply. He wouldn't know what to DO with your love, and he'd definitely have trouble opening up and being vulnerable. Nonetheless, I do think he'd try; he has initiative to do well to you, and to give you everything he can give to you (starts off with him being your literal guardian demon, progresses into him becoming soft to you). It'd take time and effort for him to learn how to love you properly.

Fluff 1) In the beginning stages of your relationship, Levi would enjoy cleaning with you. He would find himself giving you commands to do more chores (with him).. because he -- wants to -- be with you -- so often??? (won't ever never admit this).

NSFW 1) Levi is a v*rgin. Yes. Yes he (most likely) is. He never met the right person before you, so he never had a chance/time to indulge in s*x. The first time you and Levi have s*x, Levi will have his mouth CLAMPED shut-- trying not to make a noise, trying to control his expressions of pleasure. You'll have to teach him/encourage him to just let go lol.

NSFW 2) Levi wanted to have s*x with you for so damn long cause he's soooo attracted to you, but he will not initiate it LOLLLL. He just doesn't know HOW to ask for that. You had to feel up on him and really let him know you wanted it (breathy whispers and requests), before he FINALLY took the reigns and pinned you against the wall, kissing you hard before taking you to the bedroom~~!!

Also, he's a fast learner. (Imagine with that what you will 🥵).

Fluff 3) & After you two finish, he will clean you up immediately. But after that he won't let you go. Will hold you in a hug for an eternity. Is addicted to your warmth and the love/care you two give to each other.

ARMIN - OH MY GOD NO BECAUSE - i'm so in love with this man - oKAYYY: Armin is a very thoughtful, perceptive, and practical lover. You would feel *so safe* around him, at ease, and like you can be your full self. He's very accepting.

Armin is also going to *look out for you.* He is insanely analytically accurate. He has a clear, reassuring, and gentle energy about him. You know that with Armin, you'll be protected from any new obstacle or harm's way.

You and Armin would see the world for fun. Armin is somebody who feels fascinated with exploring the world, and with learning. He'd probably want a partner who is brave. He'd probably want somebody whose actions or way of doing life, amaze him. He would be so f*cking blushy around you, stuttering and all, whenever you smile so brightly at him -- you're like the sun to him.

Armin *would die for you.* He practically died already, for Eren & the mission. Armin wouldn't hesitate to give himself up, because that's how deep and true his love is for you. (And you genuinely get mad at him for this... but neither of you will budge-- you'd both die for each other).

Fluff 1) You and Armin like to read together :'). Armin will have red blush dusted across his cheeks, and his eyes will be shining as he talks excitedly, imagining all the things the book talks about. You adore it.

Fluff 2) You tell Armin you had a rough day, and he will set up a bath for you. While you bathe in the dark with candles, Armin will be in the kitchen with stew or soup simmering on the stove, before he quietly leaves the house: He will personally scour the bookstore in order to find a book that he thinks will make you smile-- or a book you two will both enjoy reading together/discussing together. Literally this man is like light okay. When you come out from the shower he will be there with a fresh, steaming bowl of stew and a dessert he picked up from the store. You two will eat together and then read a book, cozily cuddling on the couch.. before things get s*xy.

NSFW 1) This man is a *PLEASURER* -- Everything will be gentle, but imbued with such strong love for YOU. Will worship your body. Armin will feel like the luckiest man alive. He sees all your goodness, admires you, and is huge on praising you. Also he moans a lot, even if it's just a soft one that escapes him. Not sorry.

NSFW 2) For my switches/d0ms: You care deeply for Armin, and you also want to see his face when he's a writhing mess-- Sometimes you'll tie him up, and he will... oh he will be so helpless and flustered. You will be giving him all the sensation and he will *love it so much.*

REINER - Somebody come get yo man TT!! Reiner is a f*cking sweet, really good guy. Would protect you and your children (if you have them)-- with EVERYTHING he has -- from difficult, unfair situations (like what he was put through). But, Reiner also probably would want somebody who is strong, because strength means you can protect yourself, and change the world -- Strength is a necessary trait for survival, and he is attracted towards people who are able to stay efficient and alive.

Reiner wants a morally beautiful/morally pure hearted partner. Definitely wants a good person (I mean... Him and Historia in Season, what was is, 2? --speaks for itself). AND I MEANNN Reiner has such a soft heart-- he literally cracked psychologically because he couldn't handle the trauma of being a double agent in a cruel world-- so his pure heart seeks out another pure heart <3

Reiner would ADORE relaxation time with you! He wants the soft fluff, and the soulful moments, like laying together under the stars-- being safe, peaceful, *free.* Reiner has had the burden of war and the Armored Titan like a boulder on his shoulders for ... as long as he can remember. When you're both cozied up together, hands interlaced under the big night sky, Reiner's heart will have bursted and melted all throughout his body. He hasn't ever felt freedom before-- until you. (don't mind me f*cking sobbing right now. he deserves the world!!)

Fluff 1) You and Reiner sometimes do typical, fluffy couple stuff, like go to parks and have picnics, or going to the aquarium, or baking together. Reiner loves the domestic life with you, and you will always catch him gazing dreamily at you, as if he's not sure you're really his. Are you actually right there in front of him? How did he get this lucky? ..Man short circuits a lot around you.

Will definitely be so caught up in his smittenness for you that when you drop the bread dough on the ground and start getting upset/sad, he will just be staring at you like o// //o, not even realizing what happened.

NSFW: I honestly haven't thought about this but I will update this post when I do have some accurate guess on what Reiner in the bedroom is like-- (you can comment if you wanna be tagged for when I do finish this post/ make part two)

𐡘 \

Don't forget to leave a like, or to comment/follow if you want!! Comment to be tagged in part 2! (Jean, Eld, Marco, Bertholt, Connie, Porco, Zeke, etc etc) Feel free to comment! I'd LOVE to hear y'all's thoughts on this post <3! Hope ur all okay.

[monsterblogging]

List of Official/Official-Adjacent Pacific Rim Media

Here's a list of Pacific Rim media for y'all Pacific Rim fans who want to check out as much of it as possible!

PACIFIC RIM (2013 FILM) Usually considered the primary text of this franchise. Pacific Rim fans mostly agree it's good.

PACIFIC RIM NOVELIZATION BY ALEX IRVINE The novelization of the 2013 film. The book's writer, Alex Irvine, had texts from Legendary Pictures work with, but some of the information was outdated. Furthermore, the book has a cynical, smug tone and comes off like it's written for the type of audience who thinks CinemaSins is actual media criticism. The only thing it's really good for is for scraping out lore, but it's full of contradictions and occasionally uses outdated lore, so you have to compare/contrast it with other materials.

TALES FROM YEAR ZERO Authored by Travis Beacham, this comic explores the origins of the PPDC and the Jaeger program. It's interesting for lore, but story-wise, it might not be engaging if you aren't into Travis Beacham's particular romantic storytelling tastes. Also, if you're a puritan who gets offended when main characters are kinda fucked up people, this isn't for you.

TALES FROM THE DRIFT Authored by Travis Beacham, this comic tells the haters-to-lovers story of Duc and Kaori Jessop, pilots of Tacit Ronin. Mildly interesting for lore, and another romance-oriented story. (Beacham loves those.)

PACIFIC RIM: MAN, MACHINES, & MONSTERS The official artbook. Has some interesting information and lore, though it also contains a few typos and references outdated worldbuilding.

TRAVIS BEACHAM'S TUMBLR After Pacific Rim's release, Travis Beacham answered many fans' questions. While he was often cryptic and straight-up refused to answer certain questions for fear that he'd spoil a future story, he still provided quite a bit of insight. You can visit his old blog at travisbeacham.tumblr.com

PACIFIC RIM: UPRISING Largely panned by fans of the original film. Partway through production, the sequel to Pacific Rim was handed off to another director, and many plot elements were hastily changed with little to no regard for the rich worldbuilding developed by Travis Beacham and Guillermo del Toro, or even story coherency. The film never gives really your brain space to breathe, so it's very difficult to follow the story. Moreover, it misses the thematic and allegorical tones of the first movie, and lacks its occult influences. Overall, it's a hollow followup to Pacific Rim.

PACIFIC RIM: UPRISING NOVELIZATION BY ALEX IRVINE Fundamentally, it's the same story as Pacific Rim: Uprising. The upside is that Alex Irvine's writing is significantly improved, and the story is much easier to follow in novel format. The downside is that you don't have John Boyega's acting talent.

PACIFIC RIM: UPRISING JUNIOR NOVELIZATION BY BECKY MATHESON It's more or less the same as above, but edited down for a younger audience.

THE ART AND MAKING OF PACIFIC RIM: UPRISING The PRU artbook. I've never read this one, so I couldn't tell you what's in it aside from the very obvious.

PACIFIC RIM: AFTERMATH A prequel comic to Pacific Rim: Uprising written by Cavan Scott, Aftermath tells two stories: one focuses on Jake Pentecost and his relationship with his father; the other on what happened to Hannibal Chau and Joshua Griffin (one of Vulcan Specter's pilots) after the kaiju war. The comic makes excellent use of the lore, and the stories are great.

PACIFIC RIM: AMARA A prequel comic that focuses specifically on Amara Namari. I have mixed feelings about it; the mini-Jaeger designs were great but I felt that the actual storyline was a little melodramatic. I dunno, read it for yourself and see what you think.

PACIFIC RIM: ASCENSION A prequel novel to Uprising by Greg Keyes, this story gives life and focus to many characters who didn't get a lot of attention, including the Kaidonovskys and the cadets. Mako Mori is given the narrative respect she deserves, and Hermann Gottlieb's characterization is top-notch. The author makes use of the lore provided by Legendary Pictures to weave a rich and fascinating narrative that puts the actual Uprising film to shame.

MAKING OF/BEHIND THE SCENES VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE There's a number of videos out there on YouTube, which you can find by searching up.

PACIFIC RIM CONCEPT ART There's quite a lot of concept art out there. You can start here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, or search Pinterest or whatever search engine for Pacific Rim concept art.

PACIFIC RIM: THE BLACK A cash grab produced by Netflix, The Black disregards Pacific Rim's rich worldbuilding and follows bland, generic cartoon protagonists through a bland, generic cartoon plot loosely - loosely, mind you - based on the films. It tries to be dark, but it has all the skill of a sixteen year old edgelord about it. Also, the production values are nonexistent. You will miss absolutely nothing worthwhile by skipping over it. If for some reason you really want a Pacific Rim story where child soldiers are framed as a good thing, just read Pacific Rim: Ascension. If you want dark, watch Pulp Fiction or From Dusk 'Til Dawn. If you want a story where somebody makes a religion out of turning people into monsters, watch Midnight Mass or play/watch a no-commentary playthrough of Resident Evil 4 or 8. If you want an AI that looks after two stranded children, watch 3Below. Seriously, there is nothing The Black does that something else doesn't do infinitely better. "But most of these aren't Pacific Rim stories-" Wrong. Any story can be a Pacific Rim story if you're not a coward. And just about anything is a better Pacific Rim story than The Black.

PACIFIC RIM: BLACKOUT Prequel comic to Pacific Rim: The Black. Haven't read it, but it's written by the same guy who wrote Aftermath so it's probably a sight better than The Black.

[holly-fixation]

I’m sorry to hear you don’t get too many asks!!! 😭❤️ I can definitely relate on the kinda fomo it can create, so I’m right there with you, friend!! 🤝 With that said, you are wonderful person with SO many interesting, insightful, and brilliant takes to share with the world!! ❤️ I wish you much love and attention in the future!!! NO ONE can do angst quite like you can!!! 💕

And with that said…!

Angeal funeral scenario??? >:)c (perhaps mumsy comes to pay Sephiroth’s distraught mind a visit?)

It's a small service.

It would've been large, once upon a time. His family, his friends, his family's friends, friends of the small town he grew up in. But that was gone now. Even the scientist that attempted to aid did not return. His family was dead. His town was bombed. His childhood friend disserted them.

There was no body, only a jar to hold the ashes that remained. A jar specifically intended for cookies, because even in death he would not spend his hard earned gil on something flashy he would never see.

The two Firsts sat in the front row. Behind them Thirds. And behind them the cadets that always looked up to him.

Dreams. Honor. What did they mean to the dead?

Zack couldn't keep it together, attempting to hide every tightened fist and shaken head in denial. He didn't hide the angry glares as the minister spoke of key points of Angeal's life and key principles the man beside him ignored.

Sephiroth did not move, his head hung solemnly, his body as still as a statue. Though every other rank dismissed themselves after the service was over, he and the young First remained.

Zack tried to get a rise out of him. Zack accused and screamed and cursed the Silver Soldier. You made me kill him. You left ME to make that choice! Coward! The new First even struck Shinra's greatest hero before storming out.

But Sephiroth did not move, not even as the lights dimmed automatically from the lack of life in the room.

He wished he was dead too.

[republicsecurity]

The AI in your Helmet

The instructor's voice, crisp and unwavering, cut through the ambient noise of the workshop. "Listen closely, Cadet. The HUD you see before you is not merely a display. It is your lifeline, your guide, and your most trusted advisor. Every object, every person highlighted in your field of vision carries significance, a message from the AI that resides within your helmet. It distinguishes between the mundane and the crucial, ensuring your attention is always where it matters."

I nodded, my eyes fixed on the intricate interface projected inside the helmet. The HUD pulsed with information, a dance of symbols and data that seemed to possess a life of its own. The instructor continued, his tone carrying the weight of experience. "The AI is not just a tool, Cadet. It is your constant companion, your overseer, and your protector. It processes every piece of data available, analyzing your surroundings, your actions, and even your physiological responses. It understands you better than you understand yourself."

A sense of awe mingled with trepidation as I absorbed his words. The integration of AI into my very perception was both exhilarating and daunting. I wondered about the implications of such constant surveillance, about the erosion of privacy in the face of this all-seeing technology. The instructor seemed to sense my thoughts, his gaze steady as he continued his explanation.

"The AI is not here to intrude, but to enhance. It refines your decision-making, offering insights and suggestions based on its analysis of the situation. It anticipates your needs, providing guidance when you are uncertain. In the field, seconds matter, and the AI ensures you act swiftly and decisively."

The instructor's stern expression softened, as if he understood the weight of my contemplation. "Cadet, remember this: the AI is a tool, a guide, but it is not infallible. Your instincts, your empathy, your humanity—they are what make you a paramedic. The technology augments your abilities, but it does not define you. Trust your training, your experience, and let the AI be your ally, not your master."

[salternateunreality2]

Preggoroth: Nesting

---------

Sephiroth: How can I help you, Genesis?

Genesis: *plunks down in chair, kicks feet up on Seph's desk, starts talking about his day*

One-Winged Angel: *starts playing*

Genesis: *jumps* What the fuck?

Sephiroth: You disturbed the nest. Prepare for war.

The single innocent paperclip that started all this by being moved 3cm to the left: 📎

---------

Poor Cloud Strife. He and Zack have been identified by Seph's lizard brain as "BABIES".

Kidnapping, surprise cuddling, feeding, swaddling, and lots and lots of proud staring and purring.

My babies. My perfect, beautiful babies.

---------

ALL THE SOFT THINGS.

Sephiroth's inner child is being HEALED through this process. He has built nests EVERYWHERE, from his office to Lazard's office to his apartment to Angeal's kitchen to Cloud's barracks to Genesis' closet -- any space that Sephiroth has ever felt a little bit safe or a little bit comfortable has at minimum a very soft blanket.

Zack is HERE for it, and has bought him ALL THE PLUSHIES. Not content with the Shinra SOLDIER propaganda plushies, homeboy found an entire zoo's worth of (hopefully) stuffed animals and even hand-made a few extra.

One of the homemade ones is an octopus/squid/tarantula/chameleon monstrosity that is Sephiroth's second favorite, after his lizard.

Zack created the chimera after years of listening to Sephiroth's voice warm slightly when talking about how a tentacle could hug you really well, that many eyes in weird places would be great for recon, and how he felt like he could never be his whole, true self, like a chameleon.

----------

Shinra Official Baby Shower

Boring AF, with lots of stupid gifts, schmoozing, and ceremony.

Scarlet gifted him a bunch of mechanical mobiles, which Genesis "accidentally" firagad later.

President Shinra gifted a (for him) measly check and publicly announced that the children will be "Sons of the Company" and offered "medical" treatment for life and an apartment closer to said "medical" treatment, and "nannies". Fortunately, the Turks jiggled some wires and oops the broadcast was fucked. President Shinra was uninformed about who the father is, but those in the know laughed at him behind his back for the "Sons of the Company" thing.

Heidegger had his people prepare a gift basket, but Cloud got a hold of the order and makes it secretly great, with boring stuff on top. Lots of tasty and helpful gifts for the expectant Sephiroth buried under bland diapers and onesies.

Reeve made some unhackable baby monitors to prevent Hojo's tampering or observations. He told Sephiroth about the unhackability in private, when he also gave him a mobile and a white noise machine, all also unhackable.

Hojo somehow came down with the flu and didn't make it, and his gift got accidentally incinerated. Oops.

Rufus gave Sephiroth the majority of the registry's big ticket items, like strollers, car seats, etc.

Palmer had his administrative assistant buy something off the registry, and Anne, a surprisingly insightful woman, got it in blue with a bunch of squirmy sea creatures on it. Sephiroth wrote a thank you note just to her.

Other employees brought generic cards and cheap registry items.

---------

Cadet Baby Shower

The cadets couldn't afford jack shit, but organized a diaper drive and it turned out to be one of the best and most needed gifts of all.

---------

SOLDIER and Turk Shower

This was actually more like a rager, with a ton of fun games and the rest of the registry getting filled out.

Many of the Turks and SOLDIERS gave miniature weapons of all sorts that Sephiroth was completely delighted with and squirreled away almost immediately. To this day, Lazard is still emptying tiny-weapons caches all over the Tower. The SOLDIER-Turk merch war was absurd as well.

His closest friends gave him a set of 150 bug-out bags hidden around the city and Gaia. Each bag contained cash, food, and clothes for him, a friend, and his babies, and...

His most treasured gift: a USB with a photo album plus a handful of physical pics, including 4 Lucrecia hard copies in each bag. All his friends and comrades were represented, and his closest friends had written letters to be stored on the USBs. AGSL had each hidden a quarter of them, and no one except Sephiroth himself knew the location of all of the bags.

Zack was not permitted to know the location of more than 3. It's not his fault his mouth is so fast! He's a speedy guy!

---------

Sephiroth, unable to sleep, has repainted the entire SOLDIER floor and all of his nest areas 300 times by now.

He has also done heavy and light construction work all over his and his friends' apartments.

He considered building a "baby gate" to Cloud's dorm, but stopped himself while carrying the lumber and a drill onto the elevator, realizing he didn't want to become his father. To be perfectly clear, it wasn't the "imprisoning an adult employee against his will", it was the "anti-Hojo sentiment" that stopped him.

------------

"Sephiroth, darling, we need to talk about the 3am construction," said Lazard, holding Sephiroth's hand and looking him in the eye.

"Oh, yes, I can't sleep, so I prepare for the babies. They seem to enjoy it, as they stop kicking my bladder every 2 seconds while I'm up," Sephiroth replied, glaring gently at his belly. "In fact, they're getting excited now. It is the third time this hour!"

Lazard winced.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart, that sounds awful. I'll let you go in just a second, but could you please give some thought to another hobby? Several of your colleagues and even myself are experiencing fatigue due to the construction noise. Perhaps knitting would help? I know you're preparing for the babies, and you're doing an excellent job."

"Oh! Thank you for bringing this to my attention, I forget sometimes that not everyone is used to sleep deprivation. I will certainly consider it. Now if you'll excuse me, the children are getting restless and I drank a gallon of water."

"Of course," said Lazard, and let him go, relieved at the easy acquiescence.

It wasn't until the next day when he woke up to newly knitted carpeting throughout the entire SOLDIER floor that he began to question his suggestion.

"It's better than the construction," he muttered under his breath...until he passed Cloud and Zack knitted into the wall.

Excess blankets/tiny socks/hats/etc. get donated and save some cold children's lives ❤️ Helpfulroth ❤️

@snowbanshee

[ussjellyfish]

Here's an ask for you! Was there a specific on-screen moment when you started shipping Michael/Laira?

Oh thank you!!

They have an ARC. They have an on screen arc, and I'm so accustomed to making things up (Beverly Crusher/Kathryn Janeway), or working with a handful of episodes that don't have an arc (Maleficent/Regina Mills).

Long post!

Michael is finally captain, which has been a long time coming, and she loves it, she's good at it. Season 4 is peak Michael.

I have wanted to have a ship for Michael since the show started, because I adore Michael, and nothing really hit me until Laira and Michael started talking to each other.

Episode 1 - wrecking ball era

They don't really like each other at first. Laira is "using a moment that should be about the cadets" and Michael is "a huge swing of the pendulum" who doesn't understand that sometimes she might lose.

Michael hasn't lost for awhile, so Laira has a point. Michael needs to save everyone (this is a really common rock star captain thing).

And fate has handed Michael a whole set of events where she was literally the only person in the galaxy who could fix it. Michael found a way to peacefully end the Klingon war without going as dark as parts of Starfleet wanted too.

Michael and her crew literally saved the future by going ahead in time, preventing control from getting the sphere data. It's a huge sacrifice, and they were willing to make it, and it's also a huge win. Everyone was saved.

They have this really honest, almost brutal conversation, where they both have very valid points and they're polite to each other, but they are in opposite places. Michael wants to bring everyone home. She doesn't want to mitigate life and death. Laira thinks she might need too.

And they're from very different places. Michael's from this incredibly optimistic time, where bad things happened (the Klingon war, losing Captain Georgiou, Control tries to evolve and Starfleet really grasps at straws) but the bad things are brief, and traumatic, but they persevere. They're rebuilding after the war and maybe they can be allies with the Klingons some day: Michael has retained her hope, and for good reason. Things improve, she has solutions. Her skillset is phenomenal.

Laira grew up in a universe with scarcity. She was a cargo pilot, and didn't go to the Science Academy, or the Academy on Earth, or even really see the Federation or Starfleet as what they were in Michael's time. Starfleet has hundreds of ships where Michael came from, Starfleet is a force for hope. Laira's whole life has been in a galaxy where Starfleet is tiny, and can't help, and they try, but the needs are so great, and everyone is so isolated that hope is a harder thing.

They have a whole set of conversations about leadership, and balance, and hope, and Laira pushes Michael to be better in the beginning.

They start out standing together, and end standing on opposite ends of a table. The blocking is fun, their whole conversation is so fun. They're an mildly antagonistic allies to lovers at this point. They believe in the Federation, but have differing approaches to leadership, and don't have a high opinion of each other but the mutual respect is there.

I rewatch this episode when they need banter, or I need to have them argue. I desperately wanted them to talk more after this episode. I loved Laira immediately, but I didn't write fic for them yet.

So I had interest, but I wasn't shipping shipping yet.

Episode 4 is when I did that.

In episode 4, mutual respect era, Laira conspires with Vance to get Michael and Saru to come help her with diplomacy. It's an fun insight into Laira's personality that she asked Vance to pretend to be sick, or told him to, because she wasn't sure if she wanted to ask Michael and Saru directly.

She moves pieces, and Michael's a really powerful piece.

Laira (and T'Rina) perform their political theater (and you find out at the end that they've been friends for a long time, and kind of set it up together, which is also interesting. I like the world building in this ep.

The shipping comes when Michael goes to convince Laira that they shouldn't give up. Michael and Saru come up with a plan, and it's a very Michael plan. It wouldn't work if she wasn't who she is.

Bringing Michael in is Laira's last ditch gamble, and it works. Michael throws herself at the problem and comes up with an elegant solution and proves that she is actually so adept at the thing she doesn't like. (politics).

(the table is BACK and they're at opposite sides again, but they move closer to each other! There's a whole meta I need to write about this table.)

The last scene of this episode is the one that launched my ship. They're achieved the mission. Ni'Var is coming back into the Federation. Saru and T'Rina are flirting so they're both amused by that. They're alone together and there's a fire and Ni'Var conference rooms are romantic, pretty lighting.

Laira walks around Michael, and sits on the conference table. It's one of the first times we see her relax. She sits down, not because the meeting is sitting, but because she wants to. Maybe when it's just Michael she can?

It's this shift in power and an opening and vulnerability because she must have had such a long day, and Michael saved it, and she doesn't have to be the President for Michael.

They open up to each other! Laira complements Michael for being good at politics even though she hates it. Laira admits that Vance wasn't really sick (in a roundabout way, she's coy and flirty about it, so it's not a real admission, which suits her).

Michael looks at her like THAT. Sonequa has the most beautiful face and this looks absolutely destroys me.

Laira tells Michael that she had to protect President T'Rina (who warned her that the negotiations were going to implode).

They have this exchange.

Michael walks over to her. "If you wanted my help, you could have just asked me."

They lean on the table together. Laira bites her lip. "Truth be told, I wasn't sure you were the right person for the job, but I'm glad you were."

"I appreciate that. I know transparency isn't always possible in your position but it is what I need, to best serve you and the Federation. So if you could be more forthcoming in the future, I'd appreciate that as well."

"Understood, Captain."

So much happens here. Michael says what she needs, and she's direct and polite. She has the most impeccable etiquette and always calls Laira 'ma'am'. Here she doesn't. Laira listens, nods, accepts what Michael needs and she's the one who uses her rank as a sign of respect.

Then they shake hands, which Laira initiates and it's beautifully shot with the fire in the background, AND Laira covers Michael's hand with hers before she leaves. The music swells. There are strings and horns!! (it's so fun!).

(Also this was on during touch starved COVID era and holding hands felt like a BIG DEAL).

Laira takes Michael's request to heart and asks her for help the next time she needs it.

I shipped them, so very much after this. Laira's not in the next two episodes, but she is in episode 7!

Episode 7 - power couple era.

Michael teases Laira about wanting Earth back in the Federation, Laira admits that her mother's family is from Earth and her mother never got to see it. (Vulnerability! ambition! Michael reading her so easily).

Michael stands next to Laira through the negotiations. Laira tells Michael that she has to be neutral but she thinks Michael can steer the negotiation, if she's ready for that.

(transparency!)

Michael gives an fantastic speech for peaceful first contact, and they're successful. (Laira's hands her are really cute).

Then there's "Captain, I need you with me" and I was so gone. They work together so well to accomplish things. Laira sees Michael's incredible abilities. Michael reads what Laira is thinking. They achieve something they both want together.

Episode 8 - not many people have the ability to surprise me, captain.

The episode starts out with Laira livid. She paces, her diction is razor sharp, and she fidgets with her hands. It's the most unsettled we've seen her so far.

Laira not being able to deal with something and Michael trying to help was what set off my 170,000+ word WIP that is over two years old. Something unexpected should happen and Laira should be mad about it was the starting point.

(also the episode bookends with this shot, which is really clever).

I have a whole set of thoughts about episode 10 and the end of the season, but this was how I got started. This look helped. Michael surprises Laira by how competent she is. Michael does looking several steps ahead thing and turns a loss into a win and it's very coy and fun.

Laira wings her hands later in engineering and that obviously meant she needed to go through something with michael and the Discovery crew could help and...

I did the most shipper me thing I could possibly do and started a fic where she got pregnant.

Thank you so much for asking!!! this was so fun to put together. (and took days).

Special mention to the way Laira can make "captain" both a compliment and an insult, depending on her mood. (it's the other half of my Michael saying "ma'am" kink.

[cadet-aviator]

Immersion (3)

It’s good to write about this, now, years later, as you tend to get a better insight in your motivations, hopes, dreams and desires, in retrospect, but I confess that I’m still largely in the dark about what drove me to this remarkable self-discipline, this total immersion in order and restraint and obedience. 

No one forced me. Certainly not my parents, who were mostly puzzled by it, but by and large were pleased that I was clean, healthy, normal and an excellent student.

There were no tantrums nor were there the kind of incidents that other boys my age would get into – things with alcohol, trouble at school, vandalism, I had none of that.

Nobody made me wear uniform in my spare time. Yes, drill was mandatory at school, but the majority of my classmates just went through the motions, and changed out of uniform immediately after school. And I didn’t. I put on a fresh shirt and re-tied my tie.

I mentioned before that none of these fairly extreme things – keeping a boy waiting for an hour while he faces a wall, inspecting a boy’s uniform three or four times in that hour, visiting a cadet at home, going through his private things in his private bedroom, handing out endless demerits, making a 14-year old sit down every Sunday to write a few hundred mind-numbing lines – seemed wrong to me. I accepted it and embraced it. 

When a cadet in my drill team did something wrong and was punished, I approved of the punishment, and I also approved of the punishments I was given. I would meet up with my fellow cadets and we would inspect our uniforms ourselves.

We went to the beach in uniform. We even made a vow to stay ‘pure’, to not diminish our focus on discipline by touching ourselves. 

And so obediently I signed up for this Elite Cadet Camp. The consequences became clear very quickly. The date of departure was still months away, but I was now ordered to present myself in the Army Cadet uniform – the not-so-pretty green shirt – once a week at HQ, for ‘further instruction’, which meant more inspections, a much shorter haircut, and a whole new manual to digest and learn by heart.

And whenever the Admiral was in the building, I got down on my knees again and pressed my forehead to the floor. 

He was particularly friendly to me – as I was prostrated before him – always encouraging me ‘to keep up standards my boy’, ‘make your parents proud’ and ‘focus completely on what’s ahead’.

I confess that – in retrospect – I didn’t think being on my knees like that, once a week, was strange.

I was 14 going on 15. I did my utmost do perform perfectly. It was an honour. Like everything else in this cadet life, I began to love it. 

I prepared to go to Camp. It had to happen.

(All images AI-generated)

[paws-writes-aot]

Of Devils and Monsters: Chapter One

Summary:

Fate brings two old friends together again and sets them on the path to truth. In a last ditch effort to save her own skin, Lozen Daniella Pierce reaches out to an old friend in hopes of gaining her freedom. In doing so, she and Erwin Smith find themselves thrust on a path to truth- the truth behind the walls, behind secret organizations, and the truth of who they turned into

Content tags:

Graphic Depictions of Violence; Major Character Death; Canon-Typical Violence; Denial of Feelings; Feelings Realization; Childhood Friends; Snippets of Erwin's time in the cadets; OC is Messy and Complicated; Pre-Canon Canon; Love Triangle Adjacent; Smut; Fluff and Angst; Dominant Erwin Smith; Protective Erwin Smith; Shift in POV; mentions of residential schools; OC is indigenous-coded; more tags to be added

Words Count for Chapter: 4,782

Cross-posted from Ao3

And once the storm is over you won't remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won't be the same person who walked in. That's what this storm's all about.” - Haruki Murakami, "Kafka on the Shore"

“What are you doing out here?”

The boy startled at the edge of a lake, not realizing until that moment he was being watched. With the heel of his left palm, he wiped away the rogue tears before looking over his shoulder at the newcomer.

Peering out from behind the trunk of a large sycamore tree was a girl, around his age, studying him with predatory eyes that picked up on every twitch and tick. Accusatory and suspicious eyes that shifted to curiosity as he met her gaze. Her head cocked slightly to the right.

“You’re crying.” It wasn’t a question, and despite the raspy tone, gruff in its use, there was no malice or judgment in the statement. Just a childlike inquisitiveness that provided insight into how his peers must see him. The boy’s face felt hot, being caught in what was meant to be a private moment of grief, vulnerable and raw. He’d come out to the spot his father had taken him to camp a few times- away from prying eyes and ears- for that very reason. 

He snapped his attention back to the lake, its surface rippling in the autumn breeze, swaying the reflection of the forest canopy. His hands balled into fists at his sides as he hiccuped.

“I’m not-”

“Are you okay?” The girl was at his side, staring out at the water. How did she move so silently so quickly?

All protests that licked his tongue faded at the slight shift in her tone. It reminded him of nights spent by the fire, listening to the stories his father would read to him out of old books- ones that weren’t shared with other school children-those were the times his imagination would run wild with possibilities to create his own stories, beyond the walls. Grief came flooding back to him, an anchor tied to his shoulders with the realization those nights were gone. 

“My father. He-” a sniffle and another hiccup caught his speech, “he’s dead.” He tore his attention from their reflection on the lake and towards his shoes, not wanting to see her reaction as the confession seemed to take a life of its own. “He was killed.”

New reality took shape, finally vocalized, and any semblance of control he had was gone. That tether had snapped after hours of tension and force as he went to school in his new normal, where a stranger was at the front of the class, reading verbatim from the textbook. One where he had to use all of his stamina to pretend it was a regular day and not the first on his own. His eyes burned as his vision began to swim. 

“Why?”

Tears broke the precipice and began flowing freely as a sob left him and he collapsed back to his knees. Sorrow stole the reins from him as words continued to spill out. “I- he- I told my class about his theories- challenged our history. How pieces were missing and how pieces didn’t line up.” Even now, as he yelled internally at himself to shut up, it was impossible to stay quiet. “It was all my fault! I should’ve known better and kept my big mouth shut and let people pretend to believe in some fake narrative designed to keep us contained and happy behind the walls.” The boy cradled his face in his hands, trembling. “I should’ve known better-”

“Well, duh!” The girl was kneeling beside him now, hugging her legs, and despite the glare leveled at her from beet red eyes, she continued, “They forbid old books for a reason, you know. Can’t have people dreaming of what could be and ruin peace behind the walls.”

She drew out an arrow from the quiver slung across her back and began making nonsensical symbols in the dirt at their feet. 

To his surprise, the tears stopped, as if they, too, were shocked not only by her honesty but that she hadn’t mocked him, like the other kids had. Surely, he was dreaming… The world was too cruel to grant him some respite when he had done nothing to earn it. “You know about it too?”

Her laughter jolted him more than the hand she placed on his shoulder, certain to leave a dirt imprint on his white school shirt. He kept his eyes focused on the dirt beneath her fingernails as the girl replied, “Yeah, my entire Circle knows about the lies, and,” that word was so pointed and emphasized it was abrasive, “we also know not to talk about it in public spaces, you idiot.”

When he met the girl’s eyes, there was no malice or pity held there. Just understanding, as though she knew his pain intimately through experience. 

“You didn’t kill your father. Cowards did,” she jumped to her feet, kicking the mud off the tip of the arrow with her shoe as she held his gaze. “If there’s any blame to be placed, it’s on them.” The girl returned the arrow to its home and dusted her hands on her trousers before extending one out to him. “C’mon. It’s going to be dark soon. Let’s find you a place to rest for the night, at least. Can’t have the bears or wolves getting you.”

As soon as his right hand, soft and smooth, found her rough one, he was being pulled along an unmarked path to a place she only referred to as home,  or the Circle. Branches seemed to part ways as they continued at a steady pace, leaping onto rocks over a swiftly flowing creek until she finally slowed their pace. 

The Circle, as the boy realized upon his arrival, was an apt description of what would otherwise be considered a town. At the look of wonder on his face as they crossed over the boundary from the forest into the semi-open space, she explained, “This is one of 3 within the walls. We’re little communities, I guess you could say, of a mix of first inhabitants of outside lands. The king gifted us this space on the island when we fled our homelands in exchange for aid in the war.” 

His eyes widened as he passed open stalls and tents set up in the space between and in front of the houses that lined the perimeter, where furs and hides of animals were stretched out to be processed and tanned on frames. She chuckled as she saw him take in the space around him, mind transported away for a moment from troubles as she continued her explanation. “He amazingly kept his word when the Walls were built, albeit loosely considering the encroachment on designated lands…” She trailed off, a faraway and sorrowful look in her eyes lingered for a moment before fading away as she began pointing at different locations they passed, listing off names and occupations of the inhabitants. 

At the center of the circular community sat a large fire pit surrounded by tables and chairs, spaced out haphazardly as people dressed in clothes similar to the handcrafted outfit the girl wore seemed to be setting up for dinner. Children of all ages ran between houses, bringing out different meals for the adults to arrange on the tables. As the pair passed by, the inhabitants nearby offered a small wave, some wearing puzzled looks while others merely rolled their eyes and shook their heads in amusement, as though the sight of the girl dragging a strange boy along was not entirely unexpected. 

They marched towards the northernmost part of the Circle to a cabin with a roof steeper than the rest and through the heavy oak door where she finally came to a halt. Despite reaching the intended destination, the girl kept a tight hold of his hand, as though the boy would bolt the moment she let go. And, if he was honest with himself, he wasn’t quite sure what he would do when that happened, feeling both apprehension and curiosity tugging at opposite ends of his mind. 

“Dad! Nevin! I’m back,” she yelled into the empty space, her voice, no doubt, carrying to the rooms concealed behind the doors that connected the rest of the home to the living room and kitchen area. 

A small fire gathered strength in the hearth on the far off wall, warding away the chill that began to settle with dusk. Books with well-worn spines spanned an entire wall to his right, its uniformity interrupted only by a small reading nook in the center against a window that looked out into the forest. The sun had begun to sink lower in the horizon, casting long shadows in the waning golden light. Woven pine baskets, quilts of colorful stars, paintings of dreamlike landscapes- all gave the space life and warmth, owed to a space clearly well-loved. 

“Just a minute, Dani. I will be right out,” A deep baritone answered, strained in effort from a room off to the far left. “I thought you were out with your Auntie Rita gathering herbs to send with the hunters.”

By the blush coloring her honeyed cheeks and the way she worried at her bottom lip, it was all too clear to the boy that some level of deceit had led her to cross his path. 

She dropped his hand as she flung her leather pack to the ground and dashed for the sofa. With quick movements, fluid with the ease that could only come from practice, the girl, Dani, tucked her quiver and boy beneath the couch, leaving only seconds to spare before the door creaked open. 

A tall man, two long braids of raven hair cascading over both of his shoulder, stepped out of the room. His eyes landed on the boy, widening for a moment, a bushy eyebrow raised in surprise before the surprised expression morphed into a large toothy grin.

”Pardon me, I didn’t realize we were expecting guests!” The man wiped his hands with a white cloth as he threw a pointed look towards the girl that had his same eyes and high cheekbones. Dani scuttled forward and returned to the boy’s side once more, her smile belying the anxiety that radiated off of her body. 

“Dad, this is….” She trailed off, realizing neither had exchanged names. Dani nudged him with a jab of her elbow to say his name.

”Erwin, Sir. Erwin Smith,” the words stumbled out as he jerked up his right hand, recalling the manners his own father instilled in him. The thought made his vision swim, but he held the man’s gaze. 

The anxiety ebbed as a smile stretched across her lips. He hadn’t fled. “Erwin, this is my father, Manny, but everyone calls him Chief. It’s a cooler name.”

Seconds of silence ticked by as Chief’s eyes flicked between the two children before a small rumble of laughter reverberated from his chest as a hand, calloused and worn from years of labor and subs eclipsed Erwin’s. 

“Did my Dani drag you all the way here without a proper introduction?” Erwin’s silence was enough confirmation. Chief shook his head, a deep crease wrinkling his brow as he leveled a look at Dani, who took sudden interest in removing small bits of twigs and leaves from her chunky braid. “Lozen Daniella Pierce, was this what you were doing instead of helping Rita? Kidnapping strangers?”

Gold-flecked eyes shot back to Chief, glaring. “I didn’t kidnap him, Dad,” Her hands flew to her hips as she pursed her lips in defiance, “he came willingly. I found him by the lake east of here and he’s all alone.”

”And what were you doing out there, if you were supposed to be south helping Auntie Rita?”

Dani walked right into the trap, shifting her weight back and forth before evading the inevitable confession. “But Dad, they killed Erwin’s father because he believed what we do! What was I supposed to do? Say,” she puffed out her chest to make herself bigger and dropped her voice to mimic Chief’s, “‘whoops that’s sad’ and then leave him to fend for himself through the night?”

The stinging sensation returned, but Erwin had no more strength left to stop the tears. He was tired. He was alone in this cruel world that punished dreamers and free thinkers.

The flowing tears were enough to verify Dani’s words, and while Chief would have to have a serious chat with his daughter about duty, the boy- Erwin- didn’t need to be used as his daughter’s shield in diverting responsibility. His sorrow needed tending to. 

The wrinkles creasing his forehead smoothed as he sighed, releasing the frustration he held with Dani to allow space for a kindred soul, where hospitality and generosity were called for. 

“You must be exhausted and hungry. Come, let’s get you fed.” Chief ushered the boy towards the threshold of the house. “Dani, prepare Nevin’s room for our guest. He will stay with us tonight before we escort him back to his home in the morning. Once you’re done here, you may join us for food.”

And before his daughter could take a chance to argue further with him, he led Erwin to the Circle’s inhabitants gathered around the fire to share a meal. 

*********************************************

Three days. 

It had been three grueling days of unending silence and solitude in that underground cell. Three days of neglected wounds that were growing angry, throbbing with every beat of her heart- of no food and barely enough water… Three fucking days since she sent a servant off with the hastily written letter she penned before being hauled off to this shithole in the first place. 

So, when faint footsteps echoed down the hallway, Lozen Daniella Pierce stifled the hope that bubbled up in her chest, telling herself she was hallucinating. The trial was tomorrow. If her call for help was going to be answered, it would’ve been done sooner. No one would be coming. And despite that mantra she told herself over and over, the sounds of a single pair of footsteps became two sets, growing louder and closer to her corner cell. 

It wasn’t until the flicking torchlight became eclipsed with a pair of shadows did she allow herself to believe that this was reality. People were actually here- maybe Rita had managed to convince the guards to allow a visit from an aunt. She looked up, her fingers braiding her hair paused for a fraction of a second- the only indication of surprise she would allow- before resuming their taming of greasy, matted hair. 

“You actually came?” Her throat burned as she spoke, her own voice sounding unfamiliar as its hoarseness broke the silence. “I figured you had written me off at this point.” Lozen met the sky blue gaze from her cot in the far back corner of her cell, refusing to move to allow the shadows hide the worst of her appearance. 

Erwin remained stoic as he pulled a chair from the wall opposite her cell. It wasn’t until he crossed his left foot to rest just over his right knee, Lozen allowed a glance over at the second visitor- another Scout, apparently- who was leaning against the wall, looking back at her in what she could only describe as bored interest. And even though she was shrouded in darkness, she could still feel those steel gray eyes examine each of the cuts and bruises on her face. 

Finally, Erwin answered her, apparently comfortable enough to continue the conversation. “I will admit, curiosity got the better of me-“

”So you believed my letter?”

Her eyes snapped back to him, wide with surprise as she leapt up to her feet. For a moment, the world around her spun, heart racing to support the sudden exertion. Lozen rested a hand on the cold wall, allowing its solidness to tether her as she regained her balance. Once she was certain the ground wouldn’t be ripped from under her, she took a hesitant step to allow some of her features to reach the light.

For a fraction of a second, a look of horror mixed with surprise flashed in Erwin’s eyes, telling her he hadn’t expected the extent of her injuries. Why would he? Newspapers and gossip had been making her out to be some monster who greedily killed her own husband for inheritance money and a title. It was simple, easy to swallow. No, showing the violence flowed both ways in this particular case would be far too humanizing for her peers to digest.  

As Lozen considered the look reflected at her through her old friend’s eyes, she wondered if pity was worse than simplicity, but as quickly as it registered on his face, it eased away as Erwin chuckled. Any pity she might’ve read into was gone.

”Believed? That’s to be seen…” He leaned forward, raising a furry eyebrow- at least that hadn’t changed since the last time she saw him. “You could be lying about the information, or -at the very least- overestimating its value to me.” 

“So, why waste your time on a trip out here, Section Leader Smith? The Scouts aren’t keeping you busy enough?” Based on the quick side-glance she leveled at the raven-haired companion, he seemed to have the same question for the man. 

“I needed to see if my old friend, who had been such a fiercely loving and protective person, still existed.”

Lozen felt her stomach drop, the confession far from expected and close enough to cut. Anything but that answer. An admission that echoed a question she’d faced for the past year and a half: In seeking protection and safety for not just herself, but her community, did she lose the very core of her being?

She turned her attention back to the final section of her twin braids, hands resuming their busy work as she forced out the question, “And does she?”

”Why did you kill him?”

”If you believe I actually had a reason, then know it was a good one.”

The sigh she received told her he was no doubt pinching the bridge of his nose, just like he did when they were young and he was frustrated. “Dani,” he paused, as if he shared her own surprise at her nickname, “I can’t act off of blind faith. Not when there are too many unknowns.”

The sadness in his voice brought Lozen’s attention back to Erwin, who was rubbing his palms up and down his face. An older, long tucked away part of her ached, knowing she was the cause of his distress, caught between duty and chivalry with no current way to rectify the former with the latter. 

“Oi, Shorty,” She tore her attention away from her old friend and towards the quiet observer. “What’s your name?” Walls, she hoped he could be her excuse to continue to withhold information, to retain leverage for her own protection. If not, if this stranger did play ball with her, she knew there could be no reason to continue justifying her aloofness as fear and mistrust. 

Amber clashed with ice as she held the Scout’s glare, unwavering and full of cold-blooded assessment, as he, no doubt, tried to get a read on her. 

“What’s it matter to you? Far as I’m concerned, this is a conversation between you and the Scout’s golden boy over here.” His eyes narrowed at the sickeningly sweet smile she gave him.

”Usually, I like to get to know someone before airing all of my dirty little secrets,” Lozen folded her arms over her chest, wincing as the open wounds on her back pulled away from crusting fabric. “But seeing as we’re on a bit of a time crunch, and that Erwin brought you along- which, might I say, is an accolade all to itself- a name will have to do for now.”

Three heartbeats passed as both she and Erwin awaited his response, unsure of whether he would comply or tell her to fuck off. Honestly, both seemed equally plausible, so Lozen was surprised when he answered gruffly, “Levi.”

“Now tell me, Levi, may I borrow your knife for a moment?”

“You’re joking.”

The deadpan look thrown her way didn’t phase her. Shrugging, she merely replied, “Not at all.” Lozen threw her hands up at the pair of accusatory looks that she was receiving. “What? I’m not going to attack you, or even myself for that matter.” She tugged down her tattered blouse and wrapped her arms around her as she realized her injuries were becoming more visible with each overly dramatic gesture she made.  “Not when the great Section Leader Erwin Smith is here.”

It may have been a jab at her former friend, but the pity he’d shown twice now, the second being the reason she realized her wounds were visible. However brief each moment might’ve been, it frayed her nerves to nubs. 

Before Levi could give her an answer, Erwin held out his own knife, only for Lozen to push it away with a glare that would’ve made any other man shrink. Eyes like golden embers blazed and clashed with the serene depths starting back at her. 

“Not yours, Erwin. His.”

Understanding seemed to settle in as Erwin leaned back in his chair, the unaffected mask now in place once more. A display and test of trust. 

Levi examined her face, swollen and marked up, searching for any sign of deceit only to find passivity amidst the strong features- a resolve to accept whatever happened, it would seem.

With fluid and assured movement, he flipped the blade out of its sheath, catching it by the tip before holding the handle out to her. As Lozen reached for the hilt, he yanked the knife just out of reach and leveled her with a look of warning so deadly and certain that she knew he wouldn’t hesitate to put her down if she tried anything. 

A look that made Lozen roll her eyes as he allowed her to take the knife from her. 

Within moments of accepting both the visibly sharp blade and the trust placed in her hands, the two long braids that rested over both her shoulders fell to the ground, leaving her dark auburn hair fringed and falling just below her jaw line. As quickly as she took the blade, she handed it back to Levi without another glance in his direction.

”You truly do mourn the man you killed?” Erwin broke the tense and stifling silence, understanding the unspoken intention behind the act that confused Levi and only served to annoy him further, apparently, as his brow furrowed as he pulled out a handkerchief to clean off the blade. 

She had loved. She had married. She had lost. All for a reason. 

”When did you get married?”

She knew it would be a question she would have to answer, but what Lozen didn’t expect was the way he asked it that instead turned the question into, ‘why didn’t you tell me?’ The knife embedded in her heart twisted deeper. “A little over a year and a half ago, when Chief got worse.”

A little after Erwin had visited for the first time in years. When she offered up vital intel as an olive branch for disappearing after graduation night. When they mended the gap between them that now seemed to stretch further than before. That same night, after Chief’s episode, when she realized she would have to marry Lord Vincent Moreno- a man she begrudgingly allowed herself to love but never intended on marrying originally. 

Avoiding his unspoken question, Lozen offered up the logic for the why of it, “Chief needed more intensive medical care and supervision than Rita or I could give, so I did what I had to do to take care of him and the Circle.”

”And you killed Vincent to what- ensure that security forever?”

A harsh bark of laughter escaped her before she could stop it, bringing with it stinging tears that made her close her eyes as she tilted her head back. She would not cry. Not in front of them. Not even as she came to accept that Erwin saw her for the monster she was, if that question was any indication. 

Lozen had hoped- no, prayed- that her unlikely bet was right. That he still fancied himself a savior-type. A truth seeker that would do anything for the people he cared for. That the kid with rose-colored glasses would see his childhood friend come upon hard times and need to be rescued- had already paid more than enough to warrant his support without the promised information. But it seemed the years had removed those tinted glasses and helped him to see everyone for what they truly were.

Softly, in a voice just above a whisper, “Erwin, I am tired.” Her soul felt heavy, her mind sluggish as all of the emotions she’d staved off for the past week condensed onto her bones, as if she had been hiking for days on end carrying a pack two times her size. “Let me take a break. Go check on Chief for me- I didn’t get a chance to arrange care for him. When you get back, I will give you the information I have.”

”You’re seriously asking for an additional favor?” 

Fire clashed once more with ice, and for the first time since he’d arrived, Erwin saw the Lozen he knew glaring back at Levi, only for it to fade at the sound of his voice. “It’s fine, Levi.” Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see Levi huff as he turned his attention back to cleaning the knife. “You give me your word you have information the Scouts can use to continue its operations?”

Erwin watched her shoulders droop and round as remorse seemed to pull her inwards, grief and quiet guilt glistening in her as her gaze remained transfixed on the grimey floor. It was subtle, but it was enough to confirm the weight of whatever she was hiding. Worry, or fear, had etched a crease between her brows.

“Thank you, Erwin, for checking on him. Auntie Rita is a distance away- I don’t know if news reached her yet. He’s all alone while I’m here.” Shining eyes met his own. “I will help you, answer your questions, your follow up questions, anything, I just-” a mangled sob escaped and tugged at the Section Leader’s heart. Even Levi had stilled at the sudden crack in her composure as her own carefully crafted mask crumbled before their eyes. “I just need to know he’s okay. I haven’t been able to ask the MPs. You two are the first people I’ve seen since getting tossed in here.”

Pieces fell into place. Her once tanned skin, sunkissed and freckles seemed drained of all color, save the purple yellow and red from the cuts and bruises that seemed to mar every inch of visible skin. No, the injuries that kept her from standing tall without wincing hadn’t occurred in the cell- the most recent wounds seemed to be at least three days old. She seemed to be fading from existence, and the glassy look in her eyes told him she knew and was powerless to stop it. 

“A medic hasn’t seen to you?” Rage bubbled up in his chest, simmering at the surface as Lozen shook her head. With a pointed look, Levi understood the unspoken command, nodding once before leaving Erwin’s side. 

He rose to his feet and neared Lozen’s cell, allowing a tender expression to escape his own carefully cultivated mask of stoicism as he looked at his old friend. How had it come to this?

As soon as he met her gaze, Lozen averted her eyes, cheeks reddening as she hugged herself tighter in an attempt to cover more of her inflamed skin that peaked through the ruined ruffled blouse. Quickly, he put the mask on once more, summoning up that stern persona that commanded so much respect as he realized she didn’t want his pity or concern. Lozen and her stubborn pride- at least that part of her remained the same. A starting point. He could work with that. 

“A medic will see to you shortly.” As he turned on his heel to leave, he spared a final glance over his shoulder with a last reassurance, “I will return in the evening once I’ve checked in on Chief. You have my word, Dani.”

A soft thank you followed him out of the cell block, so faint it could’ve been his mind telling him what he hoped to hear. At the top of the landing, he nodded at the medic, who hurried down in the opposite direction. 

[couldtransitionsaveher]

SIEGFRIED KIRCHEIS from LEGEND OF THE GALACTIC HEROES

JUSTIFICATION:

"Siegfried Kircheis chooses to dedicate her life to her childhood friend Reinhardt rather than develop her own path. Indeed, without Kircheis' help, it is doubtful Reinhardt's ascent to power would have been successful. No other subordinate was as loyal, as insightful, as dedicated, as selfless as Kircheis. She sublimated her drives to his so that at least one of them could be a successful man.

This leads her to a series of decisions that ultimately culminates in her death. Why? What would motivate an otherwise ambitious and promising young cadet to make this choice? Was it because she was afraid of what she would be called to do if she looked herself honestly in the mirror? What could have been if she had dedicated that courage and insight to her own development?

Transition could have saved Siegfried Kircheis" - Anonymous

Reminder: Submissions are always open! Submit here!

Did you make your daily click today?

[manasastuff-blog]

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[xerith-42]

tell us about your oc? i wanna hear EVERYTHING

Anon, I don't think you can comprehend the beast you have let out onto this world with this single ask. You wanna now EVERYTHING? I'LL FUCKIN TELL YOU EVERYTHING!!

obligatory reminder that this post is going to be long as hell (seriously this is the longest post I've ever put on this site) and I do not expect any of you to read all of this

This is Haven (no last name), the twice dead heir to the throne of Havas and she's a fucking freak!! (art by @/greenpumpkinart)

And I mean a freak! In both the neurodivergent and the sexual way, she's just a freakazoid! For a bit of insight as to why, she was the firstborn to the king of Havas, and destined to be the eventual Queen. Haven was raised by her mother who taught her how to play guitar and violin, as well as teaching her to sing and dance as a child. Music was one of the most important things to her mother, and Haven instantly inherited it and was said to have a gift with song from a very young age.

It was also at a young age that tragedy struck. When she was 6 years old, Haven's mother gave birth to her baby brother Nerrus, and didn't survive the process. A common phrase in Tu'la, especially in Havas, is the idea that "Menphina takes life as Irene gives life." There's a balance to the world that the Divine maintained, and this is one of the most literal representations of that. The joy of her brothers birth is nearly overshadowed by the tragedy of her mothers death.

Despite this, Haven swore she would take care of her brother, swore that he would get a life he deserves, swore that she would be the best big sister she ever could be-- For about 7 years. At the age of 13 the clerics and doctors of the castle staff became incredibly worried for Haven's health as she had shown significant irregularities in her development compared to her peers and her own family.

It was then that they made the diagnosis that she would never be able to bare children. Initially, this was something Haven was unbothered by. She was literally 13 and just developed her first crush on a young guard in training, and she might be able to sleep with him with no consequence? Sounds like a great deal. Until she remembers what her father values. Continuing Menphina's sacred bloodline. How can Haven take the throne if she will have no child of royal blood to take the throne when she passes? She could adopt one, but that would ruin the "sanctity of the inheritance".

Lucky for her father, Nerrus is right there! So he can become king when he's older! Gg ez!! There's a wedge driven between her and her brother as he trains to become king legitimately, while Haven still desperately holds onto her mothers memory and tries to be the queen she's meant to be.

Haven gets another 5 years in her castle where she just kind of... does her own thing. She still has her guards and attendants, but the cadet she once fancied died in combat, and the neglect her father was already prone to became far worse. Haven spent most of adolescence unsupervised as a pansexual polyamorous little goober with something deeply disturbed going on in her head, a song in her heart, and a massive chip on her shoulder.

Shortly after her eighteenth birthday, word spread through Haven's attendants that there was a hit on her life, one the King was aware of but would do nothing to prevent. As a result, Haven was rushed out of her home in the dead of the night and onto the ship of a known thief and scoundrel to the kingdom who promised to take Haven somewhere she wouldn't be recognized. That somewhere was O'Khasis, and Haven wasn't exactly told the details of her escape. Just that home wasn't safe anymore.

And she wasn't really bothered by this, at first. She always identified more with Kul'zak the Wanderer, someone who would jump at this opportunity, so she attempted to do the same once she was in O'Khasis. Where she was arrested for sleeping on the streets and being a fugitive. She was able to lie her way into the heart of the Ro'maeve family, threatening her father's wrath if she wasn't treated like she deserved. As a result, she was taken in for a night and got to meet the entire family (this all takes place literal days before Vylad is killed), particularly bonding with Zianna because Zianna is a literal treasure we do not deserve, and Vylad because he's also a musician.

Garroth and Garte both take a very neutral stance on her, though she does get to share a single brief but meaningful talk with Garroth. Zane on the other hand fucking hates her, doesn't trust her, and eventually picks Haven's cover story apart so well that her only recourse is to kiss him and then jump out of a window and book it out of there. This is one of the reasons Zane wears a mask, largely because he knows the chances of them running into one another are slim, but he's not gonna let her or anyone else get the jump on him like that.

It's during her escape that she stumbles into the village of Falcon Claw and makes quick friends with it's lord despite his seemingly standoffish nature due to their shared love of music. It might even have the potential to be more than friends, especially because Haven, the fuckin queer, also fancies his incredibly hot wife, but they have a kid and she doesn't want to be a total homewrecker. After spending a night in Falcon Claw, Haven is let loose onto Ru'aun to just... vibe.

She travels wherever she wants, finds odd people in strange places with the sound of a song, and makes her living off of befriending merchants and getting tips for her performances. She plays a lot of songs, I mean A LOT of songs (this playlist covers he entire story ashdfhjdsfg)

It's during these travels that she actually encounters quite a few canon characters, primarily the women :tm:. She and Lucinda have a brief romance after Lucinda is kicked out of Pikoro, before she moves onto Scaleswind and accidentally seduces the future lord Nicole without even knowing that she was the future lord, she just thought the redheaded woman was pretty. And then when she ends up in Brightport she gets to meet a few familiar merchants (Logan and Zoey), and she meets someone who would eventually become one of her closest friends. The first catfolk she's run into since running away from home: Nana.

Nana and Haven are absolute besties from second one, and when Nana tells Haven that she plans to open a bakery on the road from Meteli to Scaleswind, Haven tells her that she'll find her there once she's done visiting Phoenix Drop and Meteli. And Phoenix Drop is a nice little village, the lord is kind, as is his wife, and while the head guard never spoke to Haven, he didn't show outright animosity towards her like most guards.

Most guards don't trust Haven for one reason or another. Whether it's because of her music and magic combo that makes all the Lords and Ladies swoon, her tendency for a little bit of crime, or racism towards catfolk, Haven is used to guards not liking her. One not talking to her is like a breath of fresh air. What a nice little village, I sure hope nothing bad happens to them :)

On the road to Meteli she manages to semi-befriend a kooky shaman who has a fondness for her because his chickens really like her songs. Castor calls Haven the "Crazy Music Lady" and it's one of her favorite titles. Speaking of titles, she has a few. When she had a small stint with the leader of a thieves guild, she learned that Ru'aun has forgotten Kul'zak was a Wanderer and instead regards him as a fellow Keeper. So for quite some time, she goes by Haven the Wanderer. She later gets renamed to Haven the Undying, but we're a long ways away from that.

It's in Meteli that Haven's plans to just breeze through every village comes to a screeching halt when she comes face to face with the Zvahl siblings. One is eager to make clothing for a new model who fancies her in such a fun way, and the other is instantly smitten with her before he even hears a word out of her mouth. And in a frustrating twist of fate, she feels the same way about him, and ends up spending three months living with the two of them. Most of those three months are spent either helping Cadenza, or bothering/flirting/sleeping with Laurance.

Three months is the longest Haven has stayed in a village since she came to Ru'aun. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she's terrified that O'Khasis will find her and hurt the few fools she really cares about. Ultimately it's this paranoia and her desire to see Nana that gets Haven to finally leave. No fanfare, but not running. It's a quiet goodbye with Cadenza as she helps her get to bed, and a tearful kiss with Laurance when she's at the outskirts of Meteli. She promises they'll find one another again, in spite of her hopes that such a thing never happens for his own safety.

It's while she's at Nana's bakery that the plot of MCD finally catches up to her. Haven spends six months at Nana's bakery, largely as a performer/worker/caregiver when Nana exerts herself too much. To the unsuspecting eye just stopping into Nana's bakery for some sweet treats and the song of a lovely young lady, they're just really close friends. Just gal pals living together and running a business together and sleeping in the same bed-- What who said that?

N e ways, it's during an ordinary day like any other when a bright eyed woman comes bounding into Nana's bakery with so much life and love that Haven hasn't seen from someone during a first impression in so long. This woman is Irena (Aph), showing up in Episode 32 of MCD (one of the worst episodes) to finally drag Haven into the plot. This is really done when Nana shuts down shop and decides to move to Scaleswind while Haven decides to wait for Irena so she can go back to Phoenix Drop with her, see how the village has changed while she's been gone. And just when Irena is about to arrive at the bakery after finding Levin's mom, someone else swoops in on a wyvern and sweeps Haven off her feet all over again.

Haven returns to Phoenix Drop and is overjoyed to have Laurance back in her life and she finally learns the name of that silent guard she met about a year ago. And his name is Garroth?? And he sounds exactly like the one she met in O'Khasis??? Hm, odd coincidence huh? Laurance and Irena are quick to rush off to Meteli to try and rescue the missing Cadenza, and while Haven tags along, Laurance insists that she stays behind once they find out where Castor has been taken to. He can't risk her getting hurt.

Four days later Irena returned to Phoenix Drop with the news of Laurance's sacrifice. Haven spent the next month holed up in an old friends house in Brightport desperately researching the Divine, Realm Barriers, and the Shadow Abyss (Nether), hoping she could find the key to get him out of there. Or make sure he stayed there. She wasn't ever too sure of what she wanted, largely because the chance that Laurance's calling latched onto her was incredibly high given his fondness for her.

She returns to Phoenix Drop for Donna's wedding, and JUMPSCARE, that noble little prick you pissed off like three years ago is now the high priest of Irene, future lord of O'Khasis, and wants you fucking dead! Oh and while you're constantly paranoid, on edge, barely sleeping because you might be killed in your sleep, your boyfriend comes back from the other dimension he was in and is blind now! Horray! Aren't we having fun?

The rest of the plot is like this, largely being carried out in the same way, but Haven is there and contributing, primarily through her music and magic. She's a bard who can cast healing spells, and people just keep getting injured like every single plotline, so she keeps playing more and more songs to help aid them in the recovery process. Because she's previously befriended so many other characters she finds a sense of belonging as her friends move into Phoenix Drop, and while she never gets a house there, she couch surfs between the houses of all her girlfriends and also the guard tower when she feels like sleeping with Laurance, much to Garroth's chagrin.

This also means that when Katelyn shows up, she's petrified. She spends most of the end of the season hiding in Lucinda's house because she can't have anyone from O'Khasis finding her, or they will arrest her and anyone who gets in the way. Oh, and before all of that happens, she has a chance encounter with a man who's camped out around Phoenix Drop who is... eerily familiar. She can't put her finger on it.

The thing that makes Haven break her cover is when news gets out that Nicole is missing. That's when her desperation takes precedent over her need to survive and she starts searching. Katelyn is on their side at this point, but she doesn't know that, and is willingly risking her life just to ensure that Nicole is safe and Phoenix Drop doesn't go to war. And she's with the rest of the group when they go to the Irene Dimension.

Season 2 is when things start going a little off the rails due to Haven's presence, largely once Michi and Tu'la start becoming major players. When Michi kidnaps the small group, Haven is a part of it. And while Michi sells off her friends, she takes Haven herself and plans on taking her back to Tu'la, who believe Haven has been dead since she left about 18 years ago. Michi thinks that if she can take Haven back to Tu'la, she'll be forgiven for her crimes. This obviously doesn't work because Michi sucks at holding people hostage for longer than a day, but Haven gets hit with a one-two combo the minute she's safe.

Because she's safe in Scaleswind. Where Nicole is now lord, a position Haven once offered to help her run from, and she's a mother and lying to everyone about the father. Haven can see right through her bull shit and is honestly so disappointed. She leaves for 15 years and then everyone forgets that polyamory is an option. Smh. But Haven sure hasn't, especially once they stumble upon that cursed island and there's an incredibly handsome, flirty, awkward dork who's absolutely smitten with her from minute one.

I'm so serious about this Haven and Travis know each other for like five hours, share one meal together, and then sleep together. It's her current personal best for "Sleeping with a new party companion any%". Honestly when they get back to Ru'aun, Haven's feeling actually pretty okay with life. Her and Katelyn are becoming friends, she's rebuilding her friend group that's also a polycule, the cat is and has been out of the bag about who Aaron is since the end of Season 1 (and he is part of the polycule, just quieter than everyone else). Vylad is in her life again and slowly becoming a surrogate brother, and Irena wants them to go traveling? She gets to go back to Nahkra and visit the old thieves guild, It's like a dream come true--

WOMP WOMP YOUR DAD IS INVADING O'KHASIS AND YOUR BROTHER IS TRYING TO KILL YOU AND IF YOU DON'T SPILL ALL YOUR FAMILY SECRETS RIGHT THE FUCK NOW YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS ARE PROBABLY GOING TO DIE

And that's one of the main reasons Haven exists. Because the threat of Tu'la doesn't really feel like that big of a deal in the main story, at least not to the main character. It's a problem that she has to solve, but there's little to no personal stakes in the conflict until Garroth comes back. Well not anymore!! Now it's a direct threat to Haven's safety and she has what seems to be a blood thirsty monster hunting after her. Haven knows from personal experience how cruel her father and his kingdom can be, and she'll be damned if Ru'aun falls under their rule. She's the one who really starts driving the plot as Irena's scatterbrained and seemingly flippant attitude isn't suited for trying to prevent a war of this scale.

When they find the island, Haven is also a primary leader in getting stuff done there because the sooner they get this alliance set up, the sooner she can help lead an attack against Tu'la, even from the sidelines. And while progress is slow and steady, she manages to have a lot of meaningful moments with the people she cares about, she even manages to reveal to her traveling and wandering friends that she isn't dead. This, along with the knowledge that her kingdom and it's refugees regard her as dead is what causes Haven to take on her new title, Haven the Undying. The world has thought her dead twice, and yet here she is still kicking.

She holds a celebration after their alliance has been established. A celebration of their return, the new alliance, and just so she and her friends can all play in one place. It's a beautiful moment of Haven bringing her worlds together, expressing her love for others freely, and being able to just live in the moment.

The next day the refugees she met back in Scaleswind are attacked on their way to Phoenix Drop, and while Haven is in the middle of taking care of them, SOMEONE has to blow up!! I didn't go too in depth on it, but needless to say Aaron and haven were close. She was the only one in the group to know of his past before he joined, and as I said before, there was something happening between them when Haven first showed up in Ru'aun that blossomed into something real after the Irene Dimension. He was her favorite duet partner, and now he's dead.

Haven enters a grief spiral where she's unable to speak or play for a few days, but the memory of how happy Aaron looked when playing with her motivates her to play in his honor. It motivates her to keep going, to tell stories about him, sing songs about him, and even finishes the song they started writing together. Furthermore, once Garroth is back the two rekindle their old friendship, especially during the war.

But before the final push against Tu'la can take place, something... strange happens. While bothering Emmalyn in Kul'zak's crypt, Haven finds a hidden room home to many of his treasures. Including half of his relic, which instantly bonds to her and nearly kills her. She survives, but it starts really fucking with her life. She gets random memories, especially in the abandoned city, sometimes she disappears in her sleep and ends up in the lake that Kul'zak and Menphina once hung out in, and worst of all, one of the times she's there she sees Menphina. Or rather, Menphina's relic holder, her brother.

Eventually she leads the charge against Tu'la and they win!! Wahoo!! She gets to enjoy time in O'Khasis in peace, start some kind of real romance with Garroth, and just enjoy life. She even goes back to Falcon Claw to pay her respects to everyone there, along with getting some funky relic memories while in O'Khasis. She returns to the Alliance and becomes its Lord so Irena can focus on raising her children, and she even adopts a little Siamese cat and names it Gyb.

And that's as much as I have written out. I know where her story is inevitably going to end up, and it's not pretty. Before everything completely collapses she does get some respite. She gets to reunite with her brother and talk out what happened between them over their fathers rotting corpse. This is also when the two finally learn the truth about their relics. They both were given half a relic at birth. Haven was given half of Menphina's, and Nerrus was given half of Kul'zak's. And then they each got the other half of the relic they didn't have, which is very confusing for the both of them. But it does allow them to learn to love one another as family before the entire world is plunged into darkness.

Let's just say that in that battle against Araphel to decide the fate of the realms, she fights incredibly hard, she fights valiantly, she's one of the main people who's able to survive in the hellscape he spreads, but it isn't enough. In the end, she and what few of her friends remain have to make the hardest decisions they've ever had to make. In order to ensure that they can survive together, she has to become a Shadow Knight, a complete one. This means someone has to kill her, and then she has to kill the last mortal she holds dear in her heart.

In the end she does eventually get something she wanted. All Haven could ask for was a life with the ones she loved where they could live in peace. And in the end, she still has the one person who means more to her than anything. In the end, even if it feels superfluous at this point, she gets to fulfill a promise she made back when they were exploring and found Lilith on that island. In the end, she gets to marry the love of her life and live a twisted happily ever after with him.

TLDR: I'm literally in love with Laurance Zvahl and did all this so my self insert oc could marry him and have as much hot steamy sex with him as desired without worrying about having kids cause I hate kids.

[ginneke]

already too late (if we arrive at all) - #3

It's a little late, sorry, but here's part three! I know it's late, but firstly, I wasn't at my best yesterday. Secondly, it's longer. Those are my excuses.

Technically no Revali in this one, and only indirect Link. We've got some other perspectives this time. (Including insight into a certain character that some of my readers have met before, in a different story. Minor perception check ahoy for A Seed of Song.)

Note: there's hints at [hylia / the spirit of the hero] and zelink in this one, but only hints.

–

Pairing: Link / Revali Rating: T

(A soulmate AU, sort of.)

– Prompt #3: was it something i did? –

It is said that once, a very long time ago, so long ago that any records have faded into legend, and legend slowly morphing into myth…

Once, a long time ago, a goddess fell in love with a mortal.

But while she gave up her divine powers and came to live as humans did, for love of that brief life, still she could not overcome his mortality. He fell in battle and her hands could not turn back the blow, nor stem the fast elapsing time that raced towards a sunset when her own lifespan was an eternal dawn.

She grieved. Oh, how she grieved: for a goddess, half-mortal yet still half-divine, it must have been the first she felt of such an emotion. Sorrow, for the love she’d lost. Yet joy as well, for the happiness even a few short years had wrought.

And so it was writ upon her, a hope and a prayer to be reunited with that lost soul again as fate’s wheel turned; and to know, this time, just how long they might have: that she might know to be grateful for each day, and not waste time waiting for that inevitable end, hands spinning out a spool without knowing where the thread might snap.

—

Ah. But then the marks started appearing on others, too.

—

Link is twelve years old when the mark appears upon his wrist.

It's the first time in a very long time that one of Hateno's children has been so blessed, and some people point out -- well, of course it would be that child; why, he'd been marked out as special for so long already, since the day he claimed to see mighty Naydra in the sky above the dragon-god's mountain home; to say nothing of his strange self-possession around weapons, the one thing that everyone agreed was odd, but some children were like that, figuring out their interests from very early on and clinging to them tightly, without deviation. 

Well, that's besides the point, really. The point is this: at first, Link's soulmark is something positive, something innocent. Nobody in Hateno has the skill to read the threads, and there's no time to detour all the way to Zora's Domain, where their priest and their princess both have a reputation for being able to understand the mark of years, the unspooling thread and the countdown of time. How long the mark might bear the touch of gold, and just when the span of potential time would fade to ashen grey.

Bless her, but Hild tries to advocate for that anyway. Vicente knows her well enough to see through to the ulterior motive — to give Link the chance to see his friends among the Zora youths, since he's… always struggled, somewhat, at connecting with other Hylians. (The army’s cadets tend to see him as a threat.)

But duty calls, and Vicente cannot be away from his post much longer — and there are, at least, still options, even if they’re not the choices his wife thinks best. Still, he makes his promises: Hild is stubborn, and won’t be satisfied unless he agrees to have Link’s soulmark read. He has to know, she says - insists really - and Vicente can understand why. 

There might not be anyone capable of reading the threads here, in Necluda, but it’s different in the heartlands of Hyrule. So many hold the potential of the sages’ bloodlines, there. Better that they find answers for LInk soon, and from friendly quarters. 

Still, it isn't until their return to Central Hyrule that Vicente learns just how mixed a blessing the soulmark really is.

He argues for and wins a day’s leave further, long enough to take Link to the temple on the banks of the Regencia, and the sage who meets with them blanches at the sight of the gold around Link’s wrist. She’s quick to bid the boy sent away; she refuses to proclaim it within his earshot.

…The thread, she whispers to Vicente in hushed tones, is... a lot shorter than any other she's seen or heard of; why, she fears it won't even last six years.

--

Link's ears are sharper than the sage suspected. 

Link is, understandably, quite upset.

These things… aren’t unknown, though. And so Vicente can only repeat something he heard, once, from his own father, whose wrist had been marked by an ashen smudge by that point — “Not every bond is one of romantic love, lad…”

Link looks at him with an expression of fierce betrayal and refuses to talk to him for a sennight.

…Vicente should have seen this coming. A child like Link, so unlike the other children his age, would surely be attached to the thought of his bonded even without the reality of that person in front of them; and to know that that person wouldn’t survive much past his own entrance into adulthood…

Link always has had such a strong sense of justice.

Still, though there’s always that faint sense of a strain in their relationship now, his son does lapse back into obedience for a time; and if he refuses to speak to Vicente about the soulmark, well — that’s something he probably deserves, and something he hopes to fix with time…

Then his son goes missing.

Sending him to the training camp near Eldin was a mistake; it almost leads Vicente to blows with the man who’d ordered it. For all Link’s adaptivity, for all his skill and all his certainty with each and every weapon that finds its way to his hands — he’s just a boy, and Hild was right: he’s too young by far to be here. 

Vicente pleads to be allowed to leave his post; his commanding officer refuses. He petitions somebody else, and his requests fall on uncaring ears. 

He’s on the verge of leaving anyway, duty be damned, when Link reappears, a full week later, trailing an unfamiliar sword that’s almost as tall as he is. 

Unfamiliar to Vicente. The kingdom’s Sheikah allies, steeped in the histories and the dark whispers of their nation’s past, recognise it at once: Blade of Evil’s Bane. The Sword That Seals The Darkness.

The blade which, according to legend, answers to but a single hand.

If anyone still doubted the portents of the Calamity’s return, there’s no doubt now. Not now that sacred sword has been found. They drag Link in front of the young princess, who echoes the pretty words of ceremony and looks at him with pain shadowing her eyes: it’s been over five years since Her Royal Highness, the Queen, passed away; and despite her heartfelt efforts to awaken the sealing powers she’s meant to inherit, still the princess’ birthright eludes her. Vicente’s son must be a living symbol of everything she has yet to achieve.

Vicente can only try to watch out for the boy as best he can. 

He writes to Hild. She replies to him with silence. Still, at least Hild does write to Link; Aryll as well, in her clumsy six-year-old hand. Link shares the letters with him, the way he always did, and he doesn’t suspect a thing.

Vicente bears it quietly, the crumbling wilderness that his marriage has become: he reflects, and thinks it fair. Hild had never wanted this for Link. For him to be a soldier was the extent of what she could accept; she never wanted him to tread the path of knighthood. This is something out of a nightmare. There’s no chance at all that Link will be allowed to live out a quiet life in Hateno, now or at any time, and even the opportunities to visit home, which were always few and far between, will soon be beyond them.

The mistakes are his. He let Link follow too long in his shadow.

…But that’s not the only thing.

It would be one thing if it was just the sword. But soon a whisper starts to surge through the court, eyes trailing after Link with suspicion and fear. Not for anything he had done, but because of the mark on his wrist. The bloodline of the Goddess and the warrior fated to wield the Master Sword are entwined throughout history and legend, their destinies following the same path.

Princess Zelda is but eleven years old, still weeks shy of her twelfth birthday. Too young, yet, for any answering soulmark to appear upon her. But if it does —

If it does, and she is tied to Link —

If so, Princess Zelda has less than six years to live. 

—

“What did I do wrong?” Link wants to know, twelve and scared and overshadowed by the fears of the adults around him, and Vicente holds his son like he hasn’t since he was a tiny child, just seven years old. He’s still tiny, tucked into Vicente’s side and shaking like a sapling in a storm. “What did I…”

Nothing — Link did nothing wrong, and it’s cruel, so cruel, for these children to bear such a fate and the burden of an entire nation’s fears. But all Vicente can offer is this. He holds his son and lets the force of Link’s emotions shudder through him, lodging behind his ribs like blades.

He prays — not to Hylia, but to Hild’s ancient goddesses instead. Spare him, he pleads. Isn’t this enough? Hasn’t the soulmark brought Link enough pain? He doesn’t even know who his fated match is, and yet…

Spare him. Please.

—

Vicente’s prayer is answered.

The day of the princess’ twelfth birthday dawns, and her wrist remains quietly empty.

Princess Zelda is the only person disappointed by this. To hear the rumours, she thinks it is just another way that Fate has looked at her and found her wanting. Under other circumstances, Vicente might have felt some sympathy for the girl. But he, like so many others, can only feel relieved, even if his reasons stem from a different source.

The pressure on Link eases, the stares subsiding as though they’d never looked at him or his soulmark and seen the stain of treachery in them. But they can’t pretend it never happened. Even if he’ll never be allowed to act on it, Vicente remembers and quietly nurses the start of a lifelong grudge.

So does Link. Too-young Link, passionate enough to feel an impotent rage over the way they looked at him and inexperienced enough to show it, until Vicente has no choice but to take him aside and to bid him to try to temper his anguish, if but a little.

But Link can’t accept that. He turns wild eyes upon his father and demands, with all the premature grief of a loss Vicente cannot spare him from, “Why?”

Why. Oh, why indeed. What can he say to his son, that might explain the fickleness of people’s hearts? To  the experienced or the jaded it is obvious; because she is the princess of Hyrule, and its last remaining heir. The last potential claimant to the only certain power that stands between their country and the nigh-guaranteed destruction that awaits. 

But that’s not what his son is asking, is it?

In reality, it is only because she is of the royal line, the last of the royal line, and so she matters more, in the eyes of the kingdom, than some nameless, faceless someone.

Link stares at him like he’s a stranger. 

“They matter too,” he insists, that indomitable sense of justice raising its head again and stoking Link to a fury. “They matter!”

“They matter to you,” Vicente agrees. 

But he’s never had the gift of gentle speech, and what he means is this — he’s proud of Link. Proud of him for caring. Proud of Link’s principles and his unflinching sense of justice. He’s so, so proud and he wishes more than anything that he’d been granted more eloquence; maybe then Link would understand him.

That’s not what Link hears: to him, Vicente’s words are the blunt blow of reproach. He sees the way Link goes rigid, and doesn’t know how to prevent the distance that rips its way between them in that moment.

Link pulls away.

This time his silence doesn’t last a mere sennight. A fortnight, a month goes by, three months, and by the time Vicente realises that Link’s newfound silence goes far beyond stubbornness, it’s been more than a year and comes far too late. Link doesn’t speak to anyone, anymore. His secrets are locked up tight behind an impassive mask he learned to wear too young. 

Vicente suspects his anger still burns as fiercely as it ever did. But he cannot say for sure: the young man forming behind his son’s face is a stranger to him, and Vicente has long since lost his trust.

All that’s left to him is his duty and his prayers.

Let Link find that person soon.

Let the legends be true

Let him find a way to value the time they have, and not mourn the lost potential of years.

It’s a foolish hope. But for his son’s sake, Vicente hopes for it all the same.

[euphorial-docx]

yeah i’m still talking about this.

i made the backgrounds for my hunger games ttrpg system <3

REBEL:

Natural Trait: Disruptor

You’ve fought with the rebels loyally, and now they fight for you. At any point in the Hunger Games, you can call upon your friends only once to temporarily shut down the game’s broadcast for up to twenty minutes.

Skill Flairs: Insight, Persuasion

SPY:

Natural Trait: Eavesdrop

As a master of hiding in shadows, after the first day of training you learn a secret about any two people of your choice, including tributes, mentors, or other figures. Potentially, these secrets can be weaponized against them or others for your gain.

Skill Flairs: Deception, Stealth

HERMIT:

Natural Trait: Harmless

Because of your introverted nature, you’ve learned how to make others not think much about your presence. If you want to get away from a potential enemy you stumbled across, you find it easy to be let go without starting a fight.

Skill Flairs: Survival, Perception

CADET:

Natural Trait: Authority

Because of your time around peacekeepers, you have learned to instill fear into others. You can use your aura of authority to get other tributes to give you their supplies and/or leave the vicinity, as long as they are not hostile.

Skill Flairs: Athletics, Investigation, Intimidation

ELITE:

Natural Trait: Privilege

Thanks to being born into high society, audiences and sponsors tend to like you more than the lower-classed tributes around you. You can also gain the trust of tributes from high society, career districts, or tributes of the cadet, career, and elite background more easily than others.

Skill Flairs: Persuasion, History

CRIMINAL:

Natural Trait: Cheat

As a notable figure in the criminal underbelly of your district, your lawbreaking peers will come together to give you a sponsor at some point during the Hunger Games. They will give you one prohibited item that the Gamemakers are unaware of, but you do not know what that item will be and will need to keep it hidden.

Skill Flairs: Sleight of Hand, Deception

ENTERTAINER:

Natural Trait: Personality

With your skills in performance, you don’t even have to try to charm the people around you. Performing in front of an audience makes them more inclined to send you sponsors, and performing in front of other tributes makes it less likely for you to become their target.

Skill Flairs: Performance, Acrobatics

BRAWLER:

Natural Trait: Eager

You’re eager to start a fight. You add a +2 bonus per level to your initiative rolls.

Skill Flairs: Athletics, Intimidation

CAREER:

Natural Trait: Victor

Because you have been training your entire life for the Hunger Games, you know you’ll win– and so does everyone else. Other tributes will want to become your ally, and at the beginning of the games you will automatically have a sponsor that will give you one item of your choice.

Skill Flairs: Athletics, Stamina

STUDENT:

Natural Trait: Educated

All that studying has paid off after all. You gain an additional skill proficiency of your choice, as well as a +1 bonus per level to all intelligence rolls.

Skill Flairs: Medicine, Investigation

FARMHAND:

Natural Trait: Animal Whisperer

Life on a farm has prepared you for taming animals. You find it easy to befriend a non hostile creature. Tamed creatures follow you and can do basic tasks, as long as you feed them regularly.

Skill Flairs: Animal Handling, Nature

WANDERER:

Natural Trait: Gatherer

Your nomadic lifestyle has taught you how to take care of yourself and others. As long as your surroundings offer it, you can find food and fresh water for yourself and one ally twice each day.

Skill Flairs: Perception, Survival

CRAFTSMAN:

Natural Trait: Resourceful

You don’t always have everything you need to make your textiles or jewelry, but you somehow make it work every time. When crafting items, you can find all needed resources once every long rest, as long as your surroundings offer it.

Skill Flairs: Crafting, Resistance

ANGLER:

Natural Trait: Safe Passage

Having extensive experience traveling, you’ve gained an excellent memory of your surroundings. You can always recall general layouts of terrain, settlements, and other features around you.

Skill Flairs: Survival, History

[republicsecurity]

Exhibition V

On the Enviro Corps side, the chromed spade held a unique allure. Mounted on the back of the formal harness, it symbolized the dedication to environmental preservation and the tangible reward for completing their training. Jack explained the personal connection each member had with their spade, making it a meaningful representation of their commitment.

IU664 glanced at the Life Guards' propaganda poster, a colorful display promising a range of offerings:

🟡 Kids Clubs and learning to Swim 🏊 🟡 A Cadet Program 👦🏼 🟡 A Place for your Conscript Service🪖 🟡 Advanced training & education🏫 🟡 Reservists duty places😎

With a hint of cynicism, Jack commented, "Quite the menu they've got there. Kids Clubs, Conscript Service, Advanced training—sounds like a one-stop-shop for life in the Republic."

IU664 smirked, "A place for your conscript service, indeed. They make it sound like a vacation package. 'Come for the conscript service, stay for the advanced training and education.'"

Jack added, "And don't forget the reservists' duty places. Always good to have a backup job in case saving lives gets old."

They exchanged knowing glances, recognizing the carefully crafted messaging in the poster and the reality behind the glossy promises. The Life Guards, like other conscript services, had their own unique way of presenting the mandatory service as an appealing choice.

IU664 and Jack examined the poster, featuring idealized representations of Life Guards with sleek, hydrodynamic bodies:

IU664 quirked an eyebrow, "Look at that. Perfect bodies, all smooth and hydrodynamic. They really know how to sell the image, don't they?"

Jack chuckled, "Well, they've got to make it look glamorous. Who wouldn't want to be part of a force with such perfect, water-ready physiques?"

IU664 nodded, "It's all about the image. Even if the reality involves more paperwork and protocol than the glossy poster suggests."

As they continued their exploration of the exhibition, the contrast between the carefully crafted propaganda and the nuanced reality of conscript service in the Republic became increasingly evident.

IU664 and Jack exchanged glances, recognizing the subtle recruitment strategy hidden behind the seemingly innocent swimming lessons.

IU664 remarked wryly, "Clever move. Start them young, get them comfortable with the water, and then, when the time comes, introduce the idea of joining the Life Guards. It's a long game they're playing."

Jack nodded, "Yeah, it's not just about swimming; it's about planting the seed early. By the time these kids grow up, the idea of joining the Life Guards becomes a familiar and accepted path. Sneaky, but effective."

IU664 chuckled, "And the Paramedic Corps youth clubs—wonder if they practice applying chastity cages on each other."

Both conscripts exchanged amused glances, recognizing the subtle ways in which each corps tailored its youth programs to mold future recruits according to their unique ideologies.

The curator, a civilian woman, intercepted IU664 and Jack as they exited the exhibition. Her eyes gleamed with curiosity as she probed for their insights.

IU664, ever precise and disciplined, conveyed his observations with an air of efficiency. "Ma'am, the exhibition provided a comprehensive glimpse into the diverse conscript services. Each force has its unique ethos, from the paramedic's disciplined conditioning to the Enviro Corps' commitment to environmental stewardship."

Jack, the easygoing Enviro Corps conscript, chimed in with a lighthearted tone. "Yeah, it was an eye-opener, ma'am. Got to see the full spectrum—from paramedics in armor suits to us green thumbs with our spades. The Republic sure has a colorful palette of conscripted services."

The curator listened attentively, appreciating the distinct perspectives of the two conscripts. "And do you believe these insights will help forge better cooperation between the forces?"

IU664 responded with assurance, "Absolutely, ma'am. Understanding the strengths and duties of each force builds a foundation for efficient collaboration. It ensures that when the time comes, we can seamlessly integrate our efforts for the benefit of the Republic."

The curator smiled, recognizing the potential for enhanced cooperation among conscript forces.

IU664, standing tall in his red tactical paramedic armor, locked eyes with Jack, clad in his green Enviro Corps boilersuit. "Take care out there," IU664 said, his voice clear and resolute, the embodiment of the Paramedic Corps discipline.

Jack, more laid-back, gave a casual salute. "You too, Iuu. Maybe catch you at one of those youth clubs, practicing our spade-handling skills."

A chuckle escaped IU664, and he nodded. "Perhaps. Stay green, Jack."

And with that, they parted ways, each heading back to their respective groups.

[grandmaster-anne]

A princess at seventy

Stamp Collector | Published 20 July 2020

HRH Princess Anne was born at Clarence House, London, on 15 August 1950, and Jersey will issue a set of stamps and a miniature sheet to celebrate her seventieth birthday on 15 August. The only daughter of HM Queen Elizabeth II and Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, Princess Anne was created the Princess Royal in June 1987, a title that is traditionally carried by the British monarch’s oldest daughter and held for life.

Princess Anne began undertaking public engagements at the young age of eighteen. Since then she has built up a working relationship with many organisations and charities across the Commonwealth. Dedicated to many causes, and a sports enthusiast, HRH The Princess Royal has one of the busiest working schedules of all the Royal family members.

Princess Anne is involved with over 300 charities, organisations and military regiments in the UK and overseas, and she devotes a large part of her working life to official engagements and visits. Although dedicated to many charities and causes, The Princess has been the president of Save the Children UK since 1970 and to this day continues in her efforts for this cause.

From an early age, Princess Anne had a keen interest in horsemanship and progressed through the years to the highest level of equestrian competition. Her love of horses and eager sportsmanship has been evident throughout her life. In 1971, Princess Anne won the individual European Championship and was a member of the British three-day eventing team at the Montreal Olympics in 1976.

Princess Anne went on to become a British member of the International Olympic Committee, a position that she was able to take up with great insight of the Olympics. In 2012, London hosted the Olympic Games with The Princess Royal taking part in the successful bid to host the event and also as a member of the London Organising Committee.

Six stamps feature iconic photographs, which show HRH Princess Anne throughout the decades preceding her seventieth birthday. The 54p value shows HRH Princess Anne attending St. John’s Ambulance Cadet Review in Hyde Park on 7 July 1972. On the 70p HRH Princess Anne is pictured at her home Gatcombe Park, on the occasion of her sixtieth birthday in 2010.

The princess is pictured competing at the Olympic Games in 1976 with her horse Goodwill on the 84p stamp; and the 88p value shows her at the first day of Royal Ascot on 18 June 2019.

The £1.05 stamp shows HRH Princess Anne pictured at the Olympic Games handover ceremony at the Panathenaic Stadium, Athens, Greece on 17 May 2012; and the £1.18 sees The Princess Royal, Colonel of The Blues and Royals, during the Trooping the Colour in London on 12 June 1999.

The Miniature Sheet depicts HRH Princess Anne riding her horse, Goodwill, during the show-jumping section of the European Eventing Championship at Luhmühlen, in September 1975.