#But we stay space truckin.
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the-mortifying-ordeal-of · 11 months ago
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"I just, I just wanna feel good"
she begs, smoking and doping and fucking and numbing.
Babes, you know what feels good. You've been writing about it and fighting for it for years. Don't try harder, try softer. Get into your body, find your tapas, sweat and breathe. Touch your face, hold a palm to your heart, allow the tears. Believe in yourself, trust the process, drink water and eat plants and fill your freezer with whole meals. Go to bed early and wake up early. Move and listen: you have two ears, one mouth. Read your literature and live into your program. Try, forgive, let go, love, try again. You are beautiful and fierce and true. I love you and I'm listening, remember? Keep forgetting, because you're only human, but keep remembering and saying hello to your old friends. Hold space, feel it all, move through it, rest. Say thank you. Mean it. Laugh and be honest and know you belong, know they all belong here with you, too. You're not lost, not too far from home. I have intuition and wisdom and everything I need. I can say no and have it mean nothing about other people, nothing about my worth, and still say no. I can be perfect and broken, repaired with gold, whole in awe, divine love and messy simplicity. I can't be everything but thank god; I do trust the process. I know I belong here. You eat the elephant one bite at a time.
(I'm so scared. I'm so small. I feel wrong, overwhelmed, mortified, so so scared. I feel so cold and alone and tired. I feel violent, messy, contemptible. I'm sorry all the time, not enough, too much, dishonest and disoriented and wrong wrong wrong.)
Who cares what my stories are? They're just thoughts, just stories, just beliefs that I feed. Wouldn't I rather believe a beautiful story? Wouldn't I rather be wrong and happy, naïve and loving, imperfect but present? What if I am meeting expectations, or what if the expectations have nothing to do with me? What do I owe other people? What do I owe myself?
My dad thought himself into his grave, couldn't think his way into recovery. His notebooks were so much like my blogs, cosmic wrestling with sin and grace, mind and spirit. It killed him. He couldn't ego his way out of ego. His fatal blood is in me, her brutal superficiality keeps me bound. This isn't how it happens, something whispers to me from off-stage. This isn't my story. I'm fighting to love better, love bigger, and take me with me. I can be whole, I can be hope, I can do this. I'm doing it, I've been doing it, I'm so proud of you. It's been so hard but so beautiful.
Last night I was washed in a sense memory of being in our original studio, those community center partitions, the sounds of little kid karate during savasana, pushing myself and crying from frustration and laughing when I would have previously screamed, trying when I would have previously quit, finding myself. I loved the chair wall, loved the clock wall, loved the small talk as we packed up and the debriefs driving home. I loved being seen and believed in, building our community, always rolling on my side to extend a pointed foot to nudge you. I can't roll on my side anymore, still feel your absence, but it had been so long since I looked to the past with love. I loved those rooms. They saved me. I'm saved, ever-balancing, and I can carry all that with me. That was a true thing, a real thing.
My throat feels so tight. I feel like I've slipped from grace, lost my way. I know better and I'm not doing better. It doesn't feel better. It feels vastly more complicated. This too this too this too I remind myself, but it doesn't feel real. I feel like I'm languishing, muddling through, truckin' along but not fully alive. I'm an ant gnawing at saran wrap. I know what I'm supposed to be doing but I've lost my drive, lost my serenity, ever out of touch with my self-love, loving-kindness, compassion. I'm so scared at work. I'm so scared of sex. I want to stay home and get fucked up and read escapism romance. I cannot stop smoking. I feel stuck. That gallon and a half of cabbage hasn't fixed me. I don't have as much money as I'd like. I don't feel capable. I'm cold and scared and I feel like a burden, because I'm meant to be the healed healer, the recovery advocate, the mental health champion and evidence-based-practice poster child. I schedule my salads and can quote so many interventions, and yet I am without ritual, without tether, the center cannot hold. I'm so easily distracted, fatigued, overwhelmed, despairing. Ever-annoyed with my own shit, a common refrain. My thoughts a bad neighborhood, my own company toxic. I know how to fix this, and I don't, haven't yet.
You've lost the thread, babe. Do the next right thing. Urge surf. Use your resources. Be honest, tell the whole truth, be a beginner, breathe, soften, trust, love, move, laugh, rest, try. You can do this. You've done it so many times before and come so far. You haven't lost that progress. Inner peace, motherfucker. You can always wake up, always remember, always start again. You're not bad at this, not bad at all.
(What would it be like if I told her no all the time? Genuinely said no, had her hear my no? Would I want it? What would be left? Try it more, please. Say no. You won't be too small, you won't be too boring. Please say no all the time. Prune and burn and purify, love; you'll still be here when it's all gone. You can say no and breathe in the space you create. Try it please? For me? You have no idea what beauty and capacity the future holds for you, but I think it starts with saying no to what isn't working. You don't have to know what works, first. Just say no when you feel no, know no. You're okay, I promise. I'm here for you. You're so good and you can say no as much as you need to. You're resilient and loyal and honest and capable, AND you can say no. You aren't a quitter, aren't a princess. Those are old stories. Breathe into your no and feel how safe and good we are.)
We'll figure out work. There is so much need in the world, I have so many resources, and I have so many gifts, so many ways I feel flow above the line. Money will be okay. I have enough, and know how to survive and thrive. There is enough for everyone. We can figure this out. I'm not alone.
Action items: meditate? drink water. take benadryl to get back on a sleep schedule. listen to podcasts or audiobooks and do sudoku before bed? deal with the rest tomorrow. <3
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rebellionbeach · 3 years ago
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Thanks for the tag @rockanrolljunkie , very interesting questions!
1. What is the first song you remember hearing?
I don’t have any cool stories but it’s probably one of the numerous children DVDs I’ve watched for like developmental learning my parents used to show me when I was younger.  Disney Learning Adventures or something like that.  
2. What is the first band you got into?
Rick Springfield and I know he isn’t really a band but he was the first artist I really latched onto aside from my mother’s influence.  However, I suppose it was partially her fault since I first saw him live after Night Ranger had opened up for him I think in the summer of 2015.  I didn’t want to stay anymore but then once we were leaving I remember hearing Jessie’s Girl and for the rest of the night I couldn’t stop singing that verse and well, the rest is history.
3. Do you collect music on any physical format?
Haha, yes, I often make many bad financial decisions due to this.  Well, my mother is also a very big collector and lately I’ve been collecting many used CDs that I’m able to find and vinyls from Mercari.  I like both CDs and vinyl but I got to admit vinyl is slightly cooler just because seeing that large disc spinning and hearing that slightly tinged sound knowing that somebody maybe half a century ago was listening to this same disc never fails to shake me.
4. What is your favourite piece of music-related memorabilia/merchandise?
I’ve accumulated a large amount of Burrn magazines from the 80s and 90s but my favorites have got to be the 1985 Ritchie Blackmore one:
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I also have a large Nelson poster across my bed which is a great conversation piece:
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5. What is your favourite concert you've been to?
I really enjoyed the Rick Springfield concert I went to in the summer of 2019 at a fair.  It was actually accompanied by an orchestra and I remember time going by so fast.  Something funny though is that there was a pretty large seating area and everyone was standing except my small section which for some reason refused to stand.  When I tried to get up I felt the glare of somebody behind me but besides that it was a great concert!
6. If you could see one artist (or band) who is no longer alive in concert, who would it be?
Damn, that’s really hard.  Technically DP and Rainbow are still playing today but I’d absolutely love to see Mark 4 of Rainbow live, I’d do almost anything to go to that Monsters of Rock show in 1980.  Just to see Cozy play with Ritchie, Graham, Don, and Roger, that would be something truly magical.
7. Have you met any musicians?
Mostly through my mom but I’ve met Night Ranger and I remember once even at an airport which was pretty surprising.  I’ve also met Firehouse which is another one of my mother’s favorite bands but they’re all really talented and humble people.  I’ve also met Rick Springfield which was...very nerve-racking for me.  I remember looking forward to that all of 8th grade...ha good times.  My mom actually was on the same plane as Chris Impellitterri but didn’t want to go up to him because she didn’t know him too well.  She also met the Queensryche guys and Daryl Hall so if anything you know, my mom has been places.
8. What is your go-to song/album when feeling sad?
I like listening to happy music when I’m sad actually but often times I find myself listening to After the Rain by Nelson.  This past year when I was in a bad mood or whatever I would put on In the Aeroplane Over the Sea which, I know, is a interesting choice to say the least, it’s really good at either releasing the tension or creating more.
9. What is your go-to song/album when feeling happy?
I mean, Down to Earth and Ritchie Blackmore’s Rainbow come to mind.  I also have been listening to a lot of Come Taste the Band and Private Eyes by Tommy Bolin as well as Because They Can by Nelson.
10. What is one music-related documentary you love?
I’ve watched lots of DP and Rainbow documentaries but I really adore the one aired on BBC and was part of the Rock Family Trees series.  It has lots of great interviews with Jon Lord and David as well as some Cozy segments talking about the Rainbow period.  I cited it a lot while writing my research paper too.
11. What is one concert DVD that you love?
I’m not sure about concert DVDs per-say however my favorite filmed concert would have to be either Deep Purple at California Jam 1974 or Operation Live Crime with the concerts in Madison Wisconsin.  The former because it’s an iconic moment in all of rock and roll history and David and Glenn just kill it and the latter because the band just sounds phenomenal and I wanna know if anybody here in Madison, Wisconsin believes in love?
Well I don’t....
12. Do you prefer listening to playlists or full albums?
Before I listened to playlists but lately I haven’t touched them.  I usually listen to albums, they’re kind of already like playlists except created by the artist lol.  If I don’t like certain parts or are in a hurry then I don’t mind skipping.
13. Do you tend to listen to albums in order or on shuffle?
In order, shuffling can be fun though like one time I shuffled Machine Head to pick my future wedding song and Space Truckin’ came on so I guess that’s going to happen.
14. What is your favourite deep cut song by your favourite artist?
I have several favorite artists but starting with Deep Purple, songs such as Blind, Chasing Shadows, The Gypsy, Love Child, Mad Dog, and all of Who Do We Think We Are besides Woman From Tokyo come to mind.  Then for Rainbow I think Self Portrait, Makin’ Love, and Midtown Tunnel Vision are just phenomenal.  For Nelson I really enjoy Nobody Wins In the End which is the final song on their second album and Written In Rock by Rick Springfield is probably my favorite song from his.
15. What is your favorite CD/vinyl/cassette that you own in terms of packaging?
I really enjoy the No Bad Habits vinyl that I own from Graham Bonnet just because I think the cover is gorgeous and the blue suede suit just fits him perfectly.  It always sits in front of my vinyls lol.
I’d like to tag @whodoesntlikewho , @houseofaffuso , @ritchieblackless ,  @high-way-star , @inthemidnightmeme , and @vibesfromepicforest​ and anyone else who wants to do it!
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heyitsani · 4 years ago
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We Might Fall (But We Won’t Break)
Keep on Truckin’ AU Pt 4
Word Count: 7203
Rating: Teen and up
Warnings: Talks about Dick’s time at the juvenile center but nothing more than a mention of racism, mentions of dead parents, mentions of missing parents.
Pairing: Dick Grayson/Jason Todd
Summary: Officer Grayson is asked to take a teen into his home until CPS is able to find him a place to stay.
Notes: Part 4 of my Food Truck owner!Jason au.  This is where we add Duke into the mix.  I have a couple coda pieces to follow this one that won’t be full installments because they aren’t moving the plot forward, just embellishing it.
I was also asked by an anon to establish ages for reference
Bruce: 42 (Yes, he was 23 when he began fostering Dick. Money talks.) Dick: 27 (Fostered at 8, adopted at 12) Jason: 24 Tim: 21 (Fostered at 10, adopted at 11) Duke: 17 (He is brought in permanently this installment) Damian: 16 (Arrived at 10)
You can also read this on AO3 here and find the entire series here
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hello, Officer Grayson,” the kind voice of the front receptionist greeted Dick as he walked into the precinct on his day off.  
“Gracie, how are you doing this lovely day?”  He stopped at her desk to lean against it for a moment.  He smiled down at her, watching her shrug a shoulder.
“It’s been a weird day so far.  Lots of odd visitors and calls.”  Dick hummed and glanced at the lock door behind her that would lead him into the main room of offices.  “What brings you by today?  I know it’s your day off.”
“Sure is.  Got big plans.  But Commissioner called me to come in to ask me something.  He in his office?”  The smile on Gracie’s face fell into a frown and that piqued his curiosity. Gordon hadn’t sounded particularly happy on the phone, but he rarely did when calling on official business.  Even if he and Dick had known each other since Dick was just a boy being adopted by Bruce Wayne.
“He’s in his office. He’s got a kid in there with him.” A kid?  That was certainly curious.  “I’ll call and let him know you’re here.  Did he say to just go on back?”
“Yeah, said to just walk in because he knew I had plans for the day and didn’t want me to have to wait around.”  She nodded and flicked the lock on the door, causing Dick to push off her desk and grab the handle to tug it open.  “I’ll see you on my way out.  Thanks Gracie!”  
He tried not to think about the frown that remained on her face despite the wave she sent his way. He would ask her about it on his way out.  Right now he just wanted to get in and out of Gordon’s office so he could meet Jason for lunch.
“Jim?”  Dick called out as he knocked and pushed open the door to Commissioner Gordon’s office.  The older man looked over his shoulder from where he sat in the chairs usually reserved for the visitors of his office, his bad to the entrance. Dick could see the top of a bowed head of dark hair over his shoulder but focused on his boss.
“Great, Dick.  Come on in.  Close the door.”  Gordon stood and revealed a teenager who sat slouched forward, face buried in his hands. Sending Jim a questioning look, Dick shut the door behind him before walking further into the office and slipping his hands into the pockets of his black slacks.  “Duke, this is the man I was telling you about.”  The teen seemed to take a shuddering breath before lifting his head and turning red rimmed eyes onto Dick.  “Dick this is Duke Thomas and I have a bit of a situation on my hands that I think you’re the best to help with.”
“I’ll help however I can, sir,” Dick replied before he moved closer to Duke.  Crouching down, Dick got eye level with Duke and looked into his golden brown eyes while giving him a small smile.  “It’s nice to meet you Duke.”  The teen said nothing, but nodded before dropping his gaze down to his hands that now rested in his lap.  Frowning, Dick looked up at Gordon and waited for some kind of reason for this meeting.
“Duke’s parents were declared missing last night and we’ve run into a bit of a housing situation.”  Rising to stand again, Dick remained silent while his boss explained how there were no openings at any of the orphanages and that the juvenile center was the only place who could take him.  Unless someone could be deemed an emergency foster home. And that explained why Dick was there.
It also made him aware that he was most likely going to be canceling on Jason.
He had taken the time two years ago to file as an emergency option for kids who were temporarily homeless and had no other place to go.  As of that exact moment, he had housed three kids for one night each as Child Services worked to find a more permanent solution.  And since Gordon was an officer when Dick had lost his parents and ended up in the juvenile center because all of the orphanages wouldn’t take someone like him, his boss was well aware he wouldn’t want any kid to go there if he had an opening in his home.
“I see,” Dick responded to Gordon before he took the chair one space away from Duke, giving the teen space so he didn’t feel pressured.  “Duke, I have had three other kids stay with me in the past.  Each one only stayed a single night; just enough time to let CPS do their thing.  Jim calls me in these situations because as a kid, I was placed into the juvenile center and I will never stand by and allow another kid go there when I can help.”
Duke looked up at Dick and the older man smiled at him, trying to seem open and welcoming.
“How old are you, Duke?”
“Seventeen.”  A year older than Damian.  And about to age out of a system he’s about to go into.  That was problematic.
“Do you want to come stay with me until we can find you a more permanent place to live?”
“I won’t have to go to the center?”
“No.  You are welcome to stay with me for as long as you need to.” Dick watched him look over at Gordon before he looked back to Dick and gave a small, but thankful smile.  
“Duke, I need to chat with Dick about a couple of things and have him sign some papers before you leave. You can stay here and we’ll be just next door in the spare office.”  Dick rose to his feet and nodded at Duke, who was still watching him, before following Gordon out of the office.
“You could have told me over the phone,” Dick commented as soon as the door was shut.  “I would have canceled by plans before coming here.  Or at least given him a heads up.”
“I know, but the kid has been with me since we picked him up late last night.  I took him everywhere trying to find someplace for him.” Sighing, Dick pulled out his cell phone and looked at the time.  He might catch Jason before he leaves.  “Go ahead and make the call while I grab the paperwork.”  
Dick didn’t bother responding as he pulled up Jason’s contact and let the phone dial.
“I’m leaving in like two minutes, please don’t tell me I’m late.”  He couldn’t help but laugh at the other man, knowing full well that Jason was aware of the time.
“About that…”
“You got called into work again?!”  Jason groaned and Dick winced.  They had rescheduled too many dates recently because the precinct was understaffed, and Dick could never say no when Gordon called.  “You need a day off Dick.  You’re working yourself into the ground.  You fell asleep during sex two nights ago!”
“I was called into work, but not to actually work.”
“Okay?  What the hell does that mean?”
Sitting on the edge of the empty desk in the office next to Gordon’s, Dick looked out the wall of windows. “Remember how I told you I’m one of the few emergency foster parents available in the city?”  Jason grunted in response.  “There’s a seventeen-year-old kid and his parents are missing.  All of the homes are full, and the only other place is the juvenile center.”
“Ah.”
“Yeah.”  Sighing, Dick dropped his chin to his chest and closed his eyes.  “I can’t say no, Jay.  I know I haven’t told you much about the space of time between my parents and Bruce, but it’s ugly.  And I can’t let another kid go through that.  The same racist piece of shit is still running it and I won’t subject this kid to that.”  There was silence on the other end for a moment before Jason’s voice came back, softer.
“What can I do?  Do you have food?  Want me to go set up the spare room?”  And damn if these questions didn’t just cement the fact that Dick was well on his way to being in love with this man.
“I don’t deserve you. But if you could do a food shop? I’m going to ask the kid what he likes to eat and I can send you a list?”
“You are such an idiot, Dickie.  You don’t even see the amazing person the rest of us do.”  Dick scoffed and rolled his eyes, but was glad Jason couldn’t see the blush that was spreading over his cheeks.  “But yeah, send me the list and I’ll get on it.”
“Thanks, Jay.”
“Anything for you.  You let me know if I can do anything else.” Dick confirmed and said a soft goodbye just as Gordon walked back into the office with a stack of papers in hand.
By the time everything was squared away with the paperwork and Dick was given a chance to look over the case file, Dick was more than ready to eat his own hand.  He had taken a small break to give Duke a paper and pen to write a list of his favorite foods and snacks so he could send it off to Jason, but had spent the majority of the two hours signing his name on the all too familiar paperwork.
“Thanks again for doing this, Dick.  I know I ruined your day off, but I knew this wasn’t one you would want to let slip.” Dick shook Gordon’s hand as he and Duke stood at the front door of the building.  He said a goodbye to Gracie before guiding Duke out of the building and onto the street.
“I live a few blocks away and actually walked here because I was supposed to meet my boyfriend for lunch at the café down the street.  But I sent a message to my dad and he sent us a car,” Dick explained as he guided Duke toward the waiting towncar where Alfred stood waiting.
“Master Richard,” the man greeted with a nod, eyes flicking to Duke.
“Hey Alf,” Dick smiled. “This is Duke Thomas.  He’s going to be staying with me for a bit.  Thanks for giving us a ride.”
Alfred considered the teenager and Dick knew he was sizing him up in a way only Alfred ever could. “It is a pleasure to meet you Master Duke.  And it is certainly no problem.  I am happy to help when I can.”
“Just Duke, please. I’m no one’s master.”  Dick could see the teen cringing and Alfred was silent for a beat before he nodded.
“Very well.”  The older man pulled open the back-passenger door for the pair and waited for the pair to slip in before shutting the door and heading for the driver’s seat.
“I forgot that you’re a Wayne,” Duke muttered, looking uncomfortable in the situation.
Dick nodded, “This is not a normal occurrence for me.  I don’t live a lavish lifestyle.”  Though Dick did wonder if he should let the kid know he lived in a penthouse that Bruce had bought for him.  But it wasn’t like he was riding around in the Bentley and drinking out of crystal. “When we get to the apartment, you can settle in and make yourself at home.  If there’s anything from your house that you want but were unable to get, we can go by tomorrow and grab it.  You’ve been excused from school for the week, but if you want to go then I’d be happy to call and let them know you’ll be in.”
“Can I decide tomorrow?”
“That works for me,” Dick agreed.  If he were honest, he was a little surprised there was any kind of consideration. Most kids were happy to get out of school.  He was actually surprised at how collected Duke was about the whole situation.  The other kids Dick had taken in had been much younger and that could be why they were a lot more emotional, but Duke seemed to be locking everything up.  Dick considered that perhaps he was waiting until he was alone to let go.  Gordon had mentioned he had been with the teen since they had picked him up.
The car came to a stop in front of Dick’s building and the older man glanced at Duke to watch his reaction.  “Of course you live here.  Let me guess, top floor?”  Dick winced and shrugged, almost unapologetic.  Almost.
“Here we are, sirs,” Alfred said as he pulled open the door so they could climb out.  “Master Richard, shall I inform your father of the situation?  Or would you like to wait until the situation has resolved?”
“Give me a couple of days. The others were only with me for a day before CPS found homes.  Let me see how the cards fall.  I’ll call B in a few days.”
“And the young Master?”
“I’ll call Dames tonight and ask him to keep his distance.”  That caught Duke’s attention as he stood next to Dick and adjusted his bag. “My youngest brother can be a bit…prickly with strangers when it comes to me.”
“I know Damian.  I go to Gotham Academy.  He’s chill.”  That caught Dick by surprise, and he looked at Alfred who seemed just as surprised.
Shaking his head, Dick smiled at Alfred.  “Thanks for the ride, Alfred.  I promise I’ll call B in a few days.”  The older man nodded and said his goodbyes before rounding the car to drive off. “All right, let’s head in.  Jason, my boyfriend, will be here soon with the food. Is that good with you?”
“That you’re gay?”
“Bi, but no.  I more meant meeting another new person.”  Duke just shrugged his shoulders and followed Dick as he led them into the building.  “I know that being thrown into this situation can be hard, but I don’t want you to think you can’t voice an opinion just because it’s my home.  If you are uncomfortable with another person coming over then I’ll let Jay know to just ring the doorbell and drop the stuff off.”
Dick smiled down at the teen as warmly as he could, holding a hand to the elevator so that the door would stay open while they got on.  Duke just watched, looking as though he was processing what he had been told.  When he looked away as the doors slid shut as Dick hit the penthouse button, he let out a sigh.
“I don’t mind if he comes in, but I might just lay down for a bit.”
Dick nodded and slipped his hands into his pockets.  “Okay,” was all Dick offered up in my response.  He was getting the feeling that Duke wasn’t that chatty of a person and Dick would definitely have to consider that for however long he stayed here.
The remainder of the ride was done in silence and Dick made a mental checklist of all the things he was going to need to handle.  The first and foremost would be to call the agent at CPS that he usually worked with. He had a feeling he knew exactly what she would end up telling him and he had a feeling that Alfred knew too, considering he mentioned Bruce.  But until Dick knew for sure, he didn’t want to mention anything to Duke.  He didn’t want to raise expectations and foster assumptions without any base.
When the elevator doors slid open with a ding, Dick smiled at Duke and led the way to one of the only two doors on the floor.  “This is us. I’ll give you a key if you end up staying here for more than a day or two, so you can come and go as you please. Within reason, of course.”  Duke just shrugged a shoulder and waited for Dick to unlock the door and step aside for the teen to head inside.  Dick watched him take in the wide open space and the modern, clean style.  Dick had taken a bit of pride in how he had ended up decorating the place, but he knew it was a little too clinical for most people.  But Dick was a minimalist, had been since he had been born.  Living on the road with the circus had taught him to keep only what he could carry and only what was necessary.
“Help yourself to whatever in the kitchen, except the booze.  I’m a cop,” Dick joked, counting a small victory when Duke huffed a laugh. “TV is usually always on and if it’s not, the music is.  I don’t like silence.  Growing up in the circus doesn’t foster quiet in someone.  But feel free to use both.  There’s a tv in the room you’ll stay in, so you can hang out in there too. Here,” Dick gestured to the door that led to the spare room, “is your room.  There’s an attached bathroom.  But this door is also a bathroom,” he pointed to the door separating the spare room and Dick’s.  “That’s my room.  Door is pretty much always open so if you need me just go in.  Knock if the door is shut.”
Pushing the door open to the spare room, Dick let Duke go ahead of him again so he could check it out and get comfortable.  The queen sized bed sat against the far wall, dressed in white and on a raised platform. The opposite wall held a long dresser with a flat screen hanging above it.  To the left was the closet and the right the in-suite bathroom.
“I’ll let you get settled. Jason should be here soon so if you want to meet him, you can come out.  If not, no problem.”
“Thanks, Officer Grayson.” Dick laughed and shook his head.
“Just call me Dick, Duke.” The teen nodded and set his bags down at the foot of the bed before Dick left and closed the door behind him.
It wasn’t even three minutes later that Dick’s phone was ringing and Jason’s name and face were flashing at him.
“Hey,” he greeted, moving into the kitchen to make some coffee.  It was bound to be a long night for him.
“I’m downstairs. Should I come in or just drop and ditch?”
“Drop and ditch? Really?”  Jason laughed through the line and Dick felt fondness blossom in his chest.  “Come in. The kid said he didn’t care, but I don’t know if he’ll come out to meet you.”
“Cool.  I’ll be up in a minute.”
“Door is unlocked,” Dick told him before letting his phone drop down onto the counter and he continued setting up the coffee maker.  He made enough for Jason even though he knew the other man would probably put on a pot for tea if he stayed for longer than a few minutes.
Dick heard the rustling of bags before he heard Jason.  “Hey handsome,” the familiar tone called out as he rounded the corner from the hallway, lazy smile on his face.
“Hey yourself,” Dick smiled back, tilting his head back to accept the kiss the younger man pressed to his mouth before he set the bags down on the counter near the fridge. “Sorry about today.  I really was looking forward to it.”
“I was too, but we have plenty of dates ahead of us.  I can’t exactly blame you for this one.”  And no, Dick supposed he couldn’t.  “Besides, I’m still getting to see you.  Just because it’s not what we had originally planned doesn’t mean that it’s not just as good.”
“You cheeseball,” Dick teased, leaning back against the island and crossing his arms over his chest as he watched Jason unload the bags.  He noticed all the things that had been on the list and a few other items. “Is that…?”  Pushing forward, Dick glanced over the items sitting there. “You’ve been talking with Alfred.”
“I figured if I couldn’t spend today with you, I would probably get the chance in the next day or so. And since you’re being you and having such a big heart, I wanted to spoil you for it,” Jason shrugged.  Dick let his eyes scan over the ingredients to make crab stuffed mushrooms before reaching up to pull Jason in for a kiss by the back of his neck.  There was a soft thud of whatever Jason had been holding as it hit the counter so his arms could circle around Dick’s waist and pull the older man in closer.
Dick knew he should stop this now because Duke was just in the other room and Dick really didn’t want to make him feel uncomfortable, but Jason was always so tempting and his mouth was just so talented.
“We should stop,” he managed to say, pulling back for a second before surging forward again and reconnecting their mouths.  Jason hummed in response, taking control of the kiss so he could slow it down.
“We really should.  We don’t want to scar the kid.”
“No, we don’t,” Dick agreed. But even though he had pulled back enough to look into Jason’s turquoise eyes, he didn’t separate their bodies.  “But I also don’t want to hide, so…”  The silence that fell between them was comfortable as they just soaked each other in.  It had become so easy to lose himself in Jason in the months since they had started dating for real.  It got easier and easier with each passing day.  To the point where Dick was pretty sure this was it.  
Jason was it.
“Oh, sorry,” a meek voice sounded, pulling the pair apart.
“Duke, hey,” Dick smiled at the teen, trying to hide the awkwardness.  Thankfully, they had stopped the kissing and were just starring at each other at that point.  Still awkward, but not as bad.  “Did you need something?”
Duke shrugged a shoulder and looked at Jason for a moment before his eyes went back to Dick.  “You said I could meet Jason if I wanted to. I also wanted to get something to drink. I could smell the coffee,” he gestured to the now ready pot.
Jason stepped forward with his hand out, “I’m Jason.  It’s nice to meet you.”  Dick watched them exchange a handshake before he grabbed a mug out of the cabinet for Duke.
“Creamer is in the fridge and sugar next to the coffee maker,” he told Duke as he handed over the mug. “Do you like crab, Duke?  Jason brought stuff to make crab stuffed mushrooms. He’s an amazing chef.”
“I like it well enough,” he muttered as he busied himself with the coffee.  “You own that food truck.  The egg roll one.  I’ve had it a few times when you park near GA during lunch.”
Jason nodded.  “Yup, that’s me.  The kids always enjoy us when we swing by.”  Duke nodded and Dick watched him as he fixed up his coffee just how he wanted it.  The silence felt awkward and while Dick usually good at filling silences up with his chatter, he wasn’t really sure what to say now.  So, he looked over at Jason, who was already looking at him, and raised his brows.  Jason’s only response was to shrug as he went back to busying himself with the food.
“Can I help?”  Duke spoke up again, pulling both of their attention back to him.  “I like to cook.”  Glancing back to Jason, Dick found him smiling and nodding.
He held out a bunch of celery and gestured to the knife stand.  “Cutting boards are in the cabinet above the knives,” he instructed, and Dick moved out of the way so the two of them could work.  
It turned out to be perfect timing as his phone started to ring with the number for CPS flashing.
“I’ll be in my room,” Dick waved his phone at the two of them and left them to their own devices. He picked up the call as he made his way through the living room and toward his room.  “This is Grayson,” he answered, walking into the room and shutting the door behind him.
“Dick, it’s Macy,” a familiar voice greeted him.  She was a social worker he had known since he had joined the force years ago.  “I hear you have Duke Thomas with you.”
“Yeah, Gordon called me in a few hours ago to come in and have me take him in.  I wasn’t expecting a call on a Saturday though, Mac.  Burning the midnight oil?”  He teased as he sat down on the edge of his bed, smiling as he heard his friend laughing on the other end.
“You got me.  But truth be told, Duke’s mom is actually one of us.  We all kind of jumped on this one.”  That made Dick’s eyebrows raise.  So, Duke knew that the odds of him being placed in foster care were low.  “And we’re in a pickle.”
“Because he’s 17?”
“Exactly.  No one wants to take him.  And the one home that might, which is a big might, is full and the kids are happy.”  Dick sighed, looking at his closed door knowing what he had to do.
“I might have an option.”
“Are you sure?  I know what you’re thinking, but do you think he would?”  And yeah, Dick was more than certain that this solution would actually work but he didn’t know how comfortable Duke would be.
Rubbing a hand over his face, Dick sighed again.  “Yeah, he’ll do it.  But Duke doesn’t seem comfortable with my level of affluent.  I’m not sure how he’ll handle Bruce’s.  Maybe I should just keep him here?”
“I hope you won’t,” Macy said honestly, and Dick made a noise of question.  “You’re only able to take one kid at a time given your career and space.  If you keep Duke, we lose an emergency home.”
“That’s a good point.” He frowned and thought for a moment, listening to the clacking of Macy obviously on her computer.  “Okay, I’ll call Bruce and talk to Duke once I hear what he has to say.  I’m going to keep Duke for a few days though.”  Macy agreed with his plan and hung up, leaving Dick in silence as he stared down at his phone.
But there wasn’t much to consider in the situation.  Duke needed a place and Dick needed to have his room open should another kid need the same help.  So Dick dialed Bruce’s number and waited for his father to answer.
“Dick,” the no nonsense greeting came through and a familiar warmth filled his chest.
“Bruce, how are you?” There was a grunt before some background talking and then silence.
“I’m thankful for this interruption to a mundane business meeting that was supposed to happen yesterday and not today,” his adoptive father said into the phone and Dick chuckled. He knew how much Bruce hated the corporate life, but kept it on because it was his father’s company.  Thankfully, Tim had enjoyed the business and Dick had been able to pursue a career he enjoyed.  “But something tells me that this is not a social call to check in since I’m pretty sure I remember Alfred mentioning you would be with Jason today and for all of us to leave you alone.”
Of course Alfred had told them that.  “I am technically with him, but something came up with work so things had to adjust.”
“Dick, you are working too hard.  You need a day off.  Do no make me call Jim and berate him for overworking my son.”
“I didn’t work today, but Gordon called me in for an emergency foster.”  Bruce hummed and Dick knew he was waiting to hear what he had to do with this.  “All of the homes were full, and the only option was the juvenile center or me.”
“I see.”  
Dick remembered what Bruce had done for him after getting him out of the center when he was eight. He remembered the comfort from the nightmares from the memories of that place.  And he knew Bruce would always remember.  How he had worked so hard to try and get the monsters removed from the staff, but hadn’t been able to get them all.
“There’s no where for him to go.  I just got off the phone with CPS and since Duke’s mom is a social worker, they tried their best but there’s nothing.  And they don’t want me to keep him because I can only take one kid at a time.”
Bruce hummed again and Dick waited to see if he would put it together.  “I know what you’re getting at, but I would like to talk to him before I agree.”
“Tomorrow?  He’s making dinner with Jay and I’d rather not have you meet my boyfriend like this for the first official time,” Dick joked, but Bruce chuckled and agreed.
“I will bring breakfast and coffee.”
“Great.  I’ll fill him in on everything tonight.  And then call CPS tomorrow.”
“I’ll be over at 9 then. See you then, Chum.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
Dick hung up the phone and rubbed at his forehead just as his bedroom door pushed open and Jason’s head popped in.  
“Everything okay?” Dick nodded and pushed himself off the bed to head back out.  “We just put the mushrooms in, and I have a couple other things working, but Duke wanted to know how to work your record player.  Apparently, you have some good vinyl options.”
“Told you I had good taste in music.”
Jason snorted and walked ahead of him as they moved into the living room.  “If by good you mean old, then yeah.  Sure.”
Dick just shook his head with a wide grin as he walked over to where Duke was flipping through all the records he had near the record player that Damian and Tim had given him for Christmas a few years back after the one he had had before had broken.
“These are classics, Dick. How long have you been collecting?” Duke asked as he looked over a Supremes record.
“Half of them were my dad’s.  But I grab the oldies when I see them at the local music shop,” Dick shrugged.  It was one of the few things he had kept going after the death of his parents.  One of the few things that had brought comfort and not pain.  Leaning over, Dick plugged the machine in and flicked it on so Duke could play whatever he fancied.  
Once the teen had settled on Simon & Garfunkel, Dick glanced to see where Jason was.  Seeing him at the stove, stirring something, he nodded and turned back to Duke.  “I need to talk to you about your situation.”  That made Duke straighten up and lose a bit of the happiness in his eyes, but Dick knew he needed to be made aware.
“There’s no place for me,” he said, sighing.
“Not in the current homes, no.  I could keep you here, but I am one of the few emergency options and can only have one kid at a time because of my job and the lack of space.”  Duke nodded and his shoulders drooped a bit.  “But my dad has plenty of room and he has taken fosters in the past, two of which he adopted.”
Duke looked confused and Dick smiled.  “My brother Tim and I were fosters.  And he said he’s happy to have you stay with him, but would like to meet you tomorrow before any decisions are made.  He wants to be sure you’d be comfortable and that it would be a good fit.”
“And if it’s not?”
“Then I suppose the city will have to either grant me another space or they’ll lose an emergency home.”  The relieved look on Duke’s face almost broke Dick’s heart.  So he placed a hand on the teen’s shoulder and ducked his head to look him right in the eyes.  “I will not let you go to that center.  And I will not let you be kicked to the curb by the system when you turn 18.  And the entire CPS office is on your side.”
Nodding his head, Dick sighed.  “Yeah, they know my mom.”  Dick nodded, showing he knew.  He gave Duke’s shoulder a squeeze before letting go.
“Bruce will be here tomorrow at 9 with breakfast.  You’ll chat and then he’ll leave so you can think it over.  There will be no pressure and no rush.  You can stay here as long as it takes you to decide.”
“Thanks, Dick.”  He sounded a little choked and Dick wanted to hug him, but instead he straightened up and took a step back.  
“Duke, I could use a hand if you’re done indulging Dick in his old man music!”  Duke laughed and Dick rolled his eyes at the kid before jerking his head in Jason’s direction.  Dick watched him put the sleeve for the record down on the table and head back over to Jason to help the older man out.  Taking a moment to just observe the two, Dick took a few deep breaths to clear his head before he joined in.
Dick watched the closed door of Duke’s room while he sipped at his cup of coffee, local news playing in the background.  He had been up for about two hours already, working on a few things for cases he had at work, waiting for 9 o’clock to roll around and Bruce to arrive.  But that was in less than 30 minutes and Duke had yet to emerge from the room.  Dick was beginning to think he should knock on the door but didn’t want to pressure the kid or freak him out.
So instead, he turned his focus back to the papers on the coffee table and tried to get some things sorted.  Which managed to distract him enough that he didn’t notice the time passing or Duke emerging from his room about five minutes before Bruce was due to arrive.
“Is there more coffee?” The sound of Duke’s voice caught Dick off guard, and he jumped slightly, snapping his gaze up to the teen.   The same teen who was currently laughing at him. “Sorry.”
Dick waved it off. “Yeah, there’s still some in the pot. But it’s a couple hours old and Bruce is bringing fresh,” he told Duke.  He watched him internally debate whether or not to get a cup now or wait. And then he watched as the decision was pretty much made for him when the sound of the front door opening filled the room.  
“Honestly, Damian, knocking is the polite thing to do,” Dick could hear Bruce berating his brother, who he hadn’t thought would be coming by for their usual Sunday morning breakfast given the circumstances.
“What is the point of having a key, which Richard gave me, if I’m not going to use it?”  Damian questioned back as they rounded the corner and came into view.  The pair immediately paused when they found Dick still seated and Duke standing, watching them both.
“Dames, I didn’t think you’d be coming this morning,” Dick smiled, standing and moving over to greet the pair.
“Thomas, good to see you. Hopefully, Richard has been accommodating.”  Damian looked over his peer and gave a nod after Duke nodded.
Bruce stepped forward and held his hand out to the teen.  “Hello, Duke.  I am Bruce, it’s nice to meet you,” his words were formal, but his smile warm.  It brought forth a memory long forgotten of the same smile as Dick exited the center to find Bruce waiting by his fancy black car, Dick’s bag in hand.
Duke shook his hand in return and gave a tentative smile.  “It’s nice to meet you too, sir.”
“None of that sir, stuff. I am just Bruce.  Now, let’s have some breakfast and chat.  Leave these two to whatever it is they do on their Sunday mornings.”  Bruce clapped a hand onto Duke’s shoulder before guiding him into the kitchen so they could sort through whatever food Alfred had prepared and get their coffee fixed.
“I have that new game, shall we?”  Damian’s voice pulled Dick’s eyes away from his dad and the teen before he was pulled into his bedroom so they could play whatever zombie game Damian had managed to convince Bruce he had to have.  “Pennyworth made us our usual and I assume you’ve already consumed too much caffeine.”
“None of that judgment stuff,” Dick joked, grabbing the remote and wireless controllers to his game station before taking up his usual spot on the bed and Damian sitting next to him. They waited for the tv to rise from the hidden compartment in his footboard, Dick giving Damian his controller and Damian handing over his egg, bacon, and cheese sandwich.  He happily ate his food while Damian logged into the system and pulled up the game from his library.
“Father said you asked him to take Thomas in.”  Dick hummed in response and raised a brow when he looked at his brother, trying to figure out if this would be good or bad.  “He was one of the few who were kind to me before he even knew me.  I would like for him not to be placed in a situation where he would be…where someone might be unkind to him.”
Smiling, Dick wrapped an arm around his brother and gave him a sideways hug.  “If B doesn’t take him, he will be staying here.”  He watched Damian consider him and what he was saying before he got a nod and his brother turned back to the game.  “Now.  Let’s get this party started.  Wally said this game is intense and I’m curious what he thinks “intense” is these days.”
Damian only snorted a laugh and started the game up for them.
“No!  Come on!  This algorithm is screwed!”  Dick tossed his controller down on the bed as Damian laughed and finished off the remaining zombies that had just killed Dick’s character off.  “Hand over the sweets, I earned them,” he grumbled, holding his hand out for the container that he knew had shortbread cookies in it. Damian held it out without complaint before he looked over at the doorway, causing Dick to look up.
“Father,” Damian greeted, and Bruce raised a brow at the sight of the two of them on the bed, food wrappers and various drinks on the bedside tables.
“Is this what you two get up to?”
“Sometimes,” Dick said around the cookie in his mouth.  Bruce sent him an unamused look.
“Damian, I would like to speak with Dick for a moment.”  Damian nodded and slipped off the bed, grabbing what little trash they had set aside and vacated the room without a backward glance.  Dick watched the man walk further into the room and shut the door behind him.  “I offered Duke a room in our home.  He said he would like a day to think about it and that he would tell you tomorrow before he goes to school what he decided.”
Dick nodded and set the container of cookies down next to him before swinging his legs off the bed. “Thanks, Bruce.  I know it’s probably not ideal, but Macy and I didn’t really know what else to do.”
Bruce waved a hand dismissively.  “It is fine. My hours at WE are not what they were when I adopted you or Tim and Duke is much older than either of you.”  Dick nodded and stood.  “I would like to have you over for dinner the day he moves in, if that is the decision he makes.  I think it might be a good time to bring Jason with you.”
“Sure, B,” Dick laughed. “I’ll mention it to Jason.”
“I just want to meet the man who seems to have made you so happy.  All my sons have wonderful things to say about him and even Duke mentioned him kindly.  And all of that has nothing on the fact that Alfred has been talking to him multiple times a week over the phone.”  The look on his father’s face made Dick duck his head and rub at the back of his neck.
“I know, I know.  I get it, I do.  I’ll talk to him about it.  I’m sure Artemis can man the truck if it’s a day he’s supposed to work,” Dick said, trying to sound apologetic but not at the same time.  “We aren’t avoiding you and he has technically met you before,” Dick reminded him of the hospital but was duly chastised by the look on Bruce’s face.  “Things have been weird with my schedule.”
“Of this, I am aware.” And yeah, Bruce had made his opinion clear on the fact that Dick had been working too hard.
“We’ll be there, I promise.” Bruce hummed and nodded.  Dick watched the other man for a moment, noticing his gaze on the massive wall of pictures that Donna had put up for him when he had moved into the place.  “B?”
Bruce shook himself out of his trance and looked back down to Dick with a smile, “I should get going since I have some work to get done, but I look forward to hearing from you tomorrow.”  Dick followed Bruce out of his room and found his brother and Duke in the living room, looking through the records.  Dick was coming to realize that Duke definitely had a love of music after him fawning over the player all night last night.  “Damian, I am leaving.  I assume you will call Alfred to collect you when you are ready to return home, per usual?”
“Yes, Father.”
“Duke, it was nice to meet you and I will wait for Dick’s call with your decision.”  The teen nodded and gave a small smile, but remained silent as he watched Bruce head toward the door and Dick followed.
“Thanks again, Dad,” Dick said as he leaned in the doorway, Bruce standing just outside in the hallway.
The smile on Bruce’s face was one he reserved for his sons.  “I do not tell you enough, but I am very proud of the man you became.  It shows in the amount of people who love you, just as your family does.  For whatever impact I had on the person you are, I am glad to have even the smallest influence.”
“Come on, B,” Dick laughed softly.  “I have just as much Wayne in me as I have Grayson.  You’re a good dad.  You have three sons who are good men to prove it.”  Bruce only nodded before glancing toward the elevator as it dinged and opened to reveal the only other person who lived on this floor.  “Love you, old man.  I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
“Love you too, Dick.” Dick watched the older man walk down the hall, nodding a greeting to Dick’s neighbor before slipping onto the still open elevator.  With a wave, Dick watched the doors slide shut and turned to head back inside.
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doomedandstoned · 4 years ago
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An Evening With EMBR
~By Shawn Gibson~
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Continuing his two-and-a-half-years' journey into the deepest, dankest corners of the heavy underground, Doomed & Stoned's intrepid sludge reporter Shawn Gibson continues his series of fun and lively interviews with bands in our still blooming and booming doom-stoner scene with this interview with founding member and drummer Eric Bigalow, whose partner Crystal Bigalow fronts the Alabama band EMBR. We hope you enjoy getting to know the band as much as we did, especially in light of their new album '1823' (2020) which was released recently on New Heavy Sounds.   [Editor]
Eric, how ya doin?
Good. I am on my daily walk. Watching my ��conspiracy videos.”
Ah!
How are you?
I'm good.
Glad to hear it! Were you able to listen to that album?
I did. Last night two times in a row!
Really?
Back to back.
Possible Album Of The Year? (laughs)
I would say it's up there, a contender for sure! I definitely like it alot!
Thank you.
In the song "Where I've Been," Crystal's vocals are amazing, beautiful, and haunting. At the end of the song Crystal has that growl!
She learned how to scream a month before we got in the studio and freakin' knocked it out! You know the song "Powder," where I'm singing to the verses?
Yes, that's definitely another one I like on '1823' (2020)
We are going to do a song where she's taking the reins on [vocals] instead of me doing it.
Is she doing dual vocals on that track? Clean, then a bit harsher vocals.
Yeah, she'll kind of mirror some parts. When I'm done singing, she will come in and sing.
"Vines" is another good one from 1823. Who's doing those growls?
That would be me. I pull it off live while I'm playing drums, too. I'm glad you dig it! It's weird when you come out with songs, as far as what you think will be people's favorite and what the band's least favorite is. You know what I mean?
Oh yeah.
"Vines" was kind of ours. We were kind of, "I don't know about this one." It seems that the people that have heard it like it.
You and I are friends on Facebook and I see good reviews for your songs and the whole album '1823.' You guys have gotten a great response!
Seems like we're getting good responses [on that song especially]. The count on our Facebook has been doing wonderful! Almost a hundred thousand views!
Very nice!
One thousand likes and four hundred and seven shares. Thats crazy, man!
Glad to hear that! You guys deserve it!
Thank you! It's always nice to hear that. In your opinion, buddy to buddy, do you think the response from the album will be as good as one song?
Definitely. I would envision praise and a very warm welcome from doom metal fans. Tell me about recording '1823.'
We went to Ledbelly Sound studios in Dawsonville, Georgia. The owner and engineer's name is Matt Washburn. He has worked with Mastodon, Royal Thunder, Artimus Pyledriver. We are real big fans of Artimus Pyledriver! They broke up years ago and it kinda hit us hard. We worked with Matt multiple times. He mastered 261. He recorded 271 and he recorded Spiritual Dialysis.
We always got along with Matt really well. He pushes you hard, but is also kind of laid back. It's a little hard to explain how that works. He has the same kind of sense of humor as we do, so it's always a good time there. We recorded this album 1823 in six days over the course of two weekends. As far as recording, we just plugged right in and Mark and Alan recorded the scratch tracks for guitar and bass while I was playing drums. I got my drums recorded pretty much on the first day.
Damn!
Yeah! Then we went back and tracked over the drums. We had the music pretty much done in the first weekend. The second weekend was pretty much a few overlays on guitar and Crystal laying down her vocals. Everybody knocked it out pretty quick, especially Crystal. Crystal goes in the booth and knocks out a song in one or two takes then moves on to the next one.
Glad to hear that!
She is really good at recreating what she does. She does the same exact thing live. She's talented that way.
Crystal has some angelic vocals, while the music is heavy as hell!
(laughs) That's what we are going for.
That is a beautiful contrast and compliment at the same time.
Thank you! She is good at finding the right notes to accompany dropped tuning. We are in drop A. The recording was awesome -- working with Matt is always awesome. We are scheduled to go back and see him in a couple months. Can't tell you why yet!
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That shows you guys are working hard.
We are trying! We are trying to make a video for every song on 1823.
That's a great feeling to have plenty of songs written and recorded, always having material to put out there. You guys work hard and practice hard, so it is easier to record and lay down tracks quicker. If you're knocking a good chunk out on a weekend, that's good! If you're paying for studio time, I'd imagine you've practiced and are ready. Studio time can be expensive.
Yeah, you don't want to go in there and dick around. You don't want to figure out the song in the studio.
Right! Tell us about your backend.
At the moment we are using Orange amps. Crowbar is using those, too. We have two Orange heads and Mark tunes one mostly to mids and lows and the other one is mids to high's. The secret sauce -- well, it's not a secret now that I'm going to tell you -- I bought an old 1969 tuck and roll bass amp. It's three 15 inch speakers. It's only two hundred watts, but you crank it all the way to where it's just breaking up. He is running two guitar amps plus a bass amp to get his guitar tone.
Wow!
That's how we achieved our guitar tone. Our bass player Alan uses really good equipment, too. He uses a dark glass amp that sounds really awesome. Matt told me he loves recording my drums because my drums are the John Bonham version that Ludwig makes, so it's all really big sizes.
Damn.
Yeah, you get a huge sound out of it. To get the shells for that kit is $1200.00 bucks, which isn't that bad. You get monster sounds out of these things and I love em! I actually have two sets!
Awesome! Listening to '1823,' "Powder, "Vines," and "Where I've Been" are my faves. I love at the end of "Where I've Been" when Crystal screams, "Where I've been!" That is badass! "Vines" fucked me up with Crystal's singing and then those male growls!
That was good, huh? Thank you! We are hoping that the next one will be a little bit heavier. A lot of our older stuff we have seven and nine minute songs. We are trying to reel that back, where we are three to five minutes. Doing stuff that is memorable, not necessarily technical.
Are you guys going to try to get back to playing shows in the fall or winter if things open back up?
Yeah, we will start booking heavy when everything opens back up. Right now we are not doing anything because nobody knows what's going on right? When stuff opens back up we will hit it hard.
You should!
We have a business plan in place to do certain shows in certain months or so many shows each month. Certain states we want to go to. We all have full time jobs, so we are trying to figure out some four day runs to kind of "tour" for the album. It is just up in the air right now. We have thought about doing some Facebook live videos or videos of us jamming in the practice space. We talked about how to get a quality recording with the footage.
On that note, what do you see in the future for EMBR?
We are planning on releasing an EP sometime soon. Right now, we are focusing on writing riffs and songs for the next actual album. In the future, we want to play a lot more shows. Right now, we are focused on material. We are putting stuff in the bank like we did for 1823. Mark will send me a riff and show me how to play it. Then I'll record it on GarageBand and write more to it then put it into Google Drive so everyone can hear it. We have about nine song ideas right now for the next one. Some might not come to fruition. What the future holds for EMBR is more work! Keep working and keep truckin'! We are all a bunch of work horses.
Hell yeah! I think you have three or four EP's before '1823.'
Yeah.
That's why EMBR has such a great response. You guys work your asses off! Do you guys have shirts or any other merch?
Oh yeah.
Where can we find this stuff at?
Our shirts are made by a company called Amplified Tee. On album 271 we had a guitarist named Craig who worked at Amplified Tee. Basically you go online and order whatever you want. I think we have five or six different designs. You can get regular shirts, girl's style tees, or a hoodie. You can go on amplifiedtee.com/EMBR. We have that available right now.
I will have to check that out!
I am actually working on a newer design right now. There might be a new design soon.
Well that's about all I have for you, Eric. I hope that you and Crystal and the other guys in EMBR are well and staying safe!
Oh yeah, definitely.
Until next time I will talk to you later, Eric.
Alright. Thank you, I appreciate it!
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saltiestdemonloves · 5 years ago
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Escaping to the Country
Oc x Steve Rogers
This is something I had been working on that had been collecting dust. It still stands that I’m taking a break on marvel and supernatural fics. But I felt it was better to post it than letting it sit in my drafts.
***
I’d seen a man on the edge of the property for nearly a week now with no signs of leaving. The place was abandoned and no one was going to report him as long as he didn’t cause any trouble. That didn’t mean I was happy with it.
Deciding that I was too curious for my own good, I set out one morning after seeing him walking around. I brought my dog Lance with me as I went, letting him walk free. He wouldn’t cause any harm as long as the stranger didn’t try anything funny. 
It took nearly ten minutes for me to get about halfway and at this point, I was starting to doubt myself. Was it worth it? He hadn’t been causing any trouble yet, why would he now? I thought about turning around and walking back home but it seemed pointless. So I kept on a-truckin and made it the rest of the way there. 
The stranger must have made this old run-down house his home and was fixing it up. He was a dirty blonde, tired looking man who was leaning back on a chair. The porch he was sitting on looked like it was the first thing he had started to fix and was made with fresh wood. A stark contrast to the rotting and worn wood the rest of the house was made of. Actually, at this new distance, it was more of a glorified shed.
“Excuse me,” I call out, putting my hands on my hips. As I wait for a response I make Lance sit next to me. The man stirs and sighs out slowly before lifting his head up and squinting in my direction.
“Hello?”
“Do you mind if I-” I cut myself off. Was this… I’d seen his face on the news. Captain America. “What the hell are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be… I don’t know, doing hero work?”
“Hero’s can’t take a break?” He asks, sitting up and crossing his arms against his chest.
I pause to blink. I mean, I guess. It’s only fair. Shrugging, I sigh and look down at Lance who smiles back up at me. “Look, I only came over because I’ve seen you working around here for about a week and this place is supposed to be abandoned.”
“Such a shame,” he murmurs, looking around him, “it’s a beautiful place.”
“Yeah,” I nod in agreement, looking around. I’d seen pictures of this place in its prime, never got to witness it myself. “I just wanted to make sure that you weren’t going to cause any trouble,” I add. “I can’t afford trouble right now, I got enough of it as is.”
He brings his hands up, palms up, “You won’t find any here. I’m looking for a break.”
“Good.” I look around at the state of his house again and grimace, “You really want to stay here?”
“I don’t want to stay where my… employers can find me.”
“Oh,” I tilt my head and grin, “So you are trouble. I had heard a little bit about how you were on the run but I didn’t know it was really true. Figured it was another one of those wild rumors circling around, the people around here get really bored.”
“Hm.” He was starting to look antsy, anxious, and upset. I knew a veteran when I saw one and I didn’t want to make him feel worse than he no doubt already did.
Exhaling softly, I reach down to pat Lance’s head, “Look, you don’t have to stay here. If you don’t want to that is. I’ve got an extra building beside my house that my dad built for me when I was a teen, a safe space I suppose. It needs some fixing and cleaning, but the workload is a lot smaller than this thing.” I sense his hesitance and quickly add, “It can be temporary, just till you get this thing fixed up. The weather here is pretty unforgiving and wild. Trust me, you’re gonna want to be staying where the walls around you are sturdy and sure to hold up. I promise to give you your privacy.”
“What do I have to do in return?”
My face twists at the question. Shaking my head, I reply with something my parents had always chanted to me, “A good person does random acts of kindness without expecting a reward. Take your time to make the decision, but the wolves and coyotes have no concept of time, and little patience. They’ll eat you up given the chance.”
He smiles and chuckles softly, nodding his head. He looks down and messes with his fingers before glancing up and giving me a softened gaze, “Thanks.”
“I’m just across the field,” I say, voice soft, pointing to where I came from. “It’s a twenty-minute leisure walk. It’s got some nice views on the way. Just be careful of snakes.” With that, I turn around and head back down the small slope I came up from, cross through the knee-high wild grass, making a mental note to check Lance for ticks, and cross the field, making my way back home.
When I arrive, I go straight for the small building that Dad had built for me when I was sixteen. A stone path from the house led up to it and I stepped on each stone carefully. The outside of the building was a faded white, there were windows on either side that were covered in dirt and spiderwebs. I walk to the front and unlock the door, slowly opening it to peek inside.
The smell of dust reaches my nose and I scrunch my face. The walls were painted a soft grey. There wasn’t much furniture on the first floor. Just the small square table and its chairs pushed into the corner near the door. I had left some of my old posters when I moved back into the house so those were up.
Walking up the short steps, I recognize that space that had been my room. The small, twin-sized bed was still there, stripped from its sheets and covers. Hopefully, the room will be enough for him, if he wants it. If not, I can use it for something. Maybe a crafts room? I spend the rest of the evening cleaning the building and making it nice. I take down my old posters, and despite everything nostalgic telling me not to, I throw them away. There’s no way that my childhood bed was going to be big enough for him but I have a spare bed in one of the extra bedrooms. I take everything but the table and the chairs inside my storage shed.
Covered in sweat, I sigh heavily and plop down on the porch swing, taking a giant chug of my drink. I didn’t notice the Captain walking up the path until he was right in front of me. Smiling, I sit up and gesture the many seats on the porch.
“You really don’t mind if I stay with you?”
“Nope,” I say, popping the “p”. I sit back and grin. “I already cleaned up the building if you want to check it out. It’s two stories with a living area on the first floor and a bedroom on the second. Kitchen and toilet are just through the garage. The kitchen’s on the left, bathrooms on the right.”
“I’m Lora,” I say, jutting my hand out for him to grab.
He takes it in a strong grip and grins, “Steve.”
Standing, I stretch with a groan and head back inside, gesturing for him to follow right behind. “This way.” I start pointing out rooms as we pass them, “That’s the living room, you’re welcome to hang out in here, the stairs to the bedrooms and another bathroom. If you decide that you’d rather stay in here then there’s plenty of room for it.” Leading him past the stairs, we reach where the kitchen and dining room was. I show him where he could use the bathroom before taking him out through the garage, straight across, out, and follow the stone path again. “Here it is.”
We stand in front of it, me looking up to see his reaction. Steve was smiling softly and studying it slowly. “It’s nice.”
“Let’s check out the inside.”
I go back into the building with Steve following me. The dust and cobwebs have been swept up, the floors swept and mopped, everything was clean and fresh-looking now. It was a wide space, comfortable when it had furniture.
“We can get you some things to fill it up, make it homier.”
“Oh, you don’t have to spend-”
“There’s plenty of places getting rid of furniture for free,” I say, waving my hand, dismissing his protests, “Don’t worry.”
Steve’s brows knit together, concerned. I pause at the bottom of the stairs to look at him. He was looking at everything with this worried and stressed look. “I…” He seems to struggle to find the words to something. 
I follow his gaze, looking around the room too. “You wouldn’t owe me anything, Steve. You don’t have to worry. I’ve been… alone for a long time so you being here is all the help and reward I need.”
“But still,” he sighs, shaking his head and exhaling sharply, his face twists into a grimace. Steve puts his hands on his hip and bounces on the heels of his feet.
He was clearly having trouble with the concept of getting to stay here for free. Well… “Steve?”
“Hm?”
“How about this. I need help around the house with gardening and rebuilding some parts of the barn.”
There’s a flash of relief on his face and he nods, smiling, “That sounds good.”
Nodding, I return the smile, “Come on, I’ll show you the bedroom.” We walk up and I stand back, letting him take in the full aspect of the bedroom.
Steve smiles at the sight of it and inhales deeply. “Alright,” he murmurs. “This is nice.” I chuckle at the hint of admission in his tone as he adds, “A lot better than that building out there.”
“I have a bed that we can move up here if you help. We can take the twin bed and put it in the other room.”
Steve looks down at the floor while chuckling and shaking his head, “You have officially won me over.”
I grin and clap my hands together, “Good! Let’s get to work.”
***
If you like it, please let me know!!
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hostingdemo · 2 years ago
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Ash vs evil dead season 3 episode 10
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Bassett (coming over from also-on-Starz Da Vinci’s Demons) does give “Bait” some generally awesome moments. The question of whether this whole thing will work without Raimi behind the camera starts getting answered tonight. Hopefully this AvED will eventually build up some actual narrative tension in addition to its tense action to help make the exposition between the fights a little less … dead … ite. I noticed, they’re brown … and lovely, like her daughter’s.”), this whole scene just gets tedious and I’m eager to move on to the next fight. So despite some funny lines (Pablo: “She doesn’t even have the crazy white eyes. “If you snag a little fish you’re not going to eat it, no, you use it as a bait fish to catch the whale,” Ash reasons, “I’m the whale, Pablo.” The problem here is with the breakneck, silly tone of everything else and that, well, he’s goddamn ASH, it’s obvious Ash knows what’s up and Kelly’s mom is a Deadite. Ash is naturally pissed, and the two argue whether or not Mom is a Deadite. Pablo reveals he took the Necronomicon to trick Ash into following Kelly. Ash’s description of running into a deer to explain their state of dress earns the best jokes for the night (“We had to cut it up with my chainsaw … arm.”), and despite their clearly homicidal appearance, they’re invited to stay for dinner. Our two blood-soaked heroes bust into Kelly’s house ready to kick ass, and find a pleasant scene of family reunion. Pablo’s character arc from sidekick to hero in his own right is clearly one of the threads we’ll be tracking this season, but so far Ash’s advice that he’ll know what to do once he’s hit isn’t yielding results. Confined spaces are always a good setting for Deadite fights, and the added threat of being in a speeding car led to a nicely paced little sequence here. Roper surprise-attacks from the back seat in the first of tonight’s two big fights. Evil Dead makes it canon that “Machine Head” is stuck in the Delta 88’s tape deck.Īfter we got a taste of him prowling in the trailer park, the possessed Mr. We got “Space Truckin” last week and now he’s apparently flipped the tape back to side A for “Highway Star” this week. I guess it’s supposed to be redemptive, but I’m still just getting gross vibes from all of this sleazy coloring of Ash.Īlso, he’s a huge Deep Purple fan? That makes sense for Ash. Evil Dead wants us to know that when he’s not fighting Deadites, Ashley J. Man, drinking and driving, hitting on woman half his age, bringing “whores with skanky wrist tattoos” (why is everyone so observant and judgmental of this poor dead girl’s wrist tattoo?) back to the trailer … Ash vs. So Ash and Pablo set off and have a little bonding time in the car, where Ash is finishing off a beer and dispensing fighting advice. Ash wants no part of the rescue mission (“I’m trying to save all the dads everywhere”), but after Pablo tells him she took the book, he reluctantly agrees to follow. Kelly takes off on Pablo’s bike to check up on her dad and recently resurrected mom, and having just had her eyeball nearly removed by a demon-woman, she’s got good reason to worry. We pick up the moment we left off in Ash’s trailer. Then again, a kitchen table got chainsawed in half while it flew through the air, so I guess we’re still getting at least some of what we came for? “Bait” spends it’s entire run time picking up the pieces leftover from the pilot and not really giving us anything new to look forward to, which does not bode well for the show reaching any sort of cohesiveness. So far, the results are disappointingly meandering. Evil Dead to show us whether it’s going to be able to function as an actual TV show and not just a half-hour pleasure cruise for Deadite nostalgists. Photo: Matt Klitscher/Starz Entertainment, LLC
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cesium-sheep · 3 years ago
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today I:
updated my address with the bank
brushed my teeth
packed some more stuff
did a little duolingo (I didn’t stay up as late as usual last night)
updated billing address most places
watered plants
packed a little more stuff
loaded some stuff in the car
checked the mail
checked through the porch stuff again for anything immediately movable
emptied out the two smaller storage cubes
brought them inside
cleaned the little table
helped decide priorities
disassembled the little table
loaded the car
wiped down the laundry shelves
unloaded the car
put away shoes
sorted clothes
put away clothes
roughed out bookshelf placement
made loft bed
put away stuffed animals
got a work text
staged bookshelves
helped with dinner
fed jackie
set up ferrets
drew kirby
put away ferrets
fed and watered ferrets
cleaned ferret messes
gathered trash
fed jackie again
brushed my teeth again
gave jackie greenies
did duolingo
tomorrow I gotta get the bed ready to move once I’m up, and move jackie’s little house into the closet so she has somewhere to hide when the other guy comes to help move shit. while we have the truck and the extra arms we need to move the tall bookshelves and the couch, and we’re also moving the animals since we’re moving the bed, although we won’t get internet at the new place until monday -n- and we still have until the 1st to gather up the remaining stuff that should all fit in the car, arin’s whole desk and the kitchen and I actually have almost nothing left here.
also when we go to ikea I need to look at clothing storage because right now I just. have my current dresser in the living room cuz there’s not space for both dressers in the bedroom and it wouldn’t make any sense for my clothes to go in arin’s office. (I still ended up purging some more shitty leggings going through and getting everything into the dresser though.)
I mentioned to arin how fuckin weird my body is that it’s just still truckin along with minimal consequence after the first day and I’m pretty sure it’s just the mega-powerful compensatory mechanisms I have for some fucking reason and she was like “yeah that’s what I’m worried about” which. fair. as soon as this is all done I’m going to become completely useless for a while. should recover by craftageddon though.
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will-work-for-music · 7 years ago
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* 2017 ALBUMS OF THE YEAR
two thousand + seventeen birthed fantastic records that found me like friends, over + over again. these masterpieces lead me to people + experiences on adventures far better than i could have dreamed. these collections songs kept me company through the highest highs, the lowest lows + the walking in between of this year marked by hardship + madness, for most of the world. these are the tunes i smiled + screamed + cried + danced to the most, this year. i’m wildly grateful for each artist + the remarkable melody-wrapped memories they’ve gifted me. here’s to the songs that stay. 🖤
loved in no particular order:
* LOVELY LITTLE LONELY - the maine
brilliant + poetic + free. this band has been liberating me since i was seventeen. before lovely little lonely was even born i jumped at the chance to celebrate 10 years of this band of brothers who’ve grown up alongside their family of fans. to truly live the lyric: “let’s fall back in love with the world + who we are + do the things we talked about but never did before..” i’m grateful to the maine for adventures i only ever dreamed + for the soundtrack to them all.. she’s a masterpiece.
* THE SEARCH FOR EVERYTHING - john mayer
“And that ends an era. August ‘14-April ’17. I made this record for *you*. May you hear and see and feel yourself in these songs.” 🌊♥️🌊 - @johnmayer
she’s stunning from beginning to end.. i kept telling everyone this show felt like experiencing a film.. it’s surely safe to say JM has made another stellar, artistic set of songs for the soundtrack of my life. wow, wow, wow.. as he kept saying to us, “thank you, thank you, thank you.”
“[On The search for everything, Mayer] succeeds because he’s not donning a new costume: instead, he’s settling into a groove he can claim as his own, and it feels like he’s at home.” - AllMusic
* HARRY STYLES - harry styles
(on album release day) every once in awhile, a record comes along that surprises you in a great way. as i put it to my best friend, [on release day].. “oops, i think i like harry’s album.” THE cameron crowe recently wrote a truly stunning, intriguing rolling stone cover story with styles as the subject.. (the cover that my mom thought featured “a young mick jagger,” without a clue about the previous week’s SNL sketch, ha). as someone who was never into one direction (sorry, rob sheffield), i likely wouldn’t have given this album a shot, but it’s everything you wouldn’t expect to hear in a “former pop star” solo record. thanks to two of my favorite writers (rob sheffield, who penned the RS review like only he can, + crowe) for encouraging me to see harry for more than the kid from the boy band.. as crowe put it (on the RS music now podcast), “he’s a music geek, in the best way..” his love of classic rock shines through, while still capturing a sound all his own. well done, HS. “from the dining table” + “two ghosts” are early favorites.. which i chose just before ryan adams tweeted it.
Rolling Stone’s Rob Sheffield put HS at number 3 on his 2017 album list: “What a revelation to see Styles live the same week as Paul McCartney – a tutorial on the connection between joy and brilliance. So is this album. The songs are built to last, standing up to months of ridiculously heavy listening. The only rock star who can come on like Macca and Mick at the same time. The only rock star who could earn all six minutes of "Sign of the Times.” The only rock star using his hard-won artistic freedom to craft the kind of hilariously anti-commercial old-school personal statement where every song counts, making big guitar moves everybody else this year was too timid to try. The only rock star who thinks cigarettes in New York are “cheap.” The only rock star.“
* PRISONER - ryan adams
"i think ‘prisoner’ has so much more hope + sensuality in it—to me, it’s liberating. those songs are more a celebration of becoming something as it’s broken apart.”
a note to ryan, as tour came to a close:
i feel the most alive inside of these songs.. the ones that break me open + somehow heal me, all at once. RA, i know this time out on the road stole your health + your joy, at times, but the wonder with which you kept playing was magic to witness. i’m grateful for your pursuit of growth + grace, no matter what comes your way. be it bronchitis, haters or heartbreak, you never let anything keep you down. thank you for not one, but two flawless dates in two sparkling cities on the prisoner tour. rest up + stay weird.. xo
* ONLY THE LONELY - colony house
just shy of two weeks into 2017, franklin, tennessee born + bred band of brothers colony house released a creative, impactful collection of songs for the soul. the rocknroll band’s strong sophomore effort landed them spots in the year’s finest festivals across the country (homegrown pilgrimage fest, chicago’s lollapalooza, new orleans’ voodoo experience). it will be exciting to see where these driving, honest story songs take them in the coming year.
* WONDERFUL WONDERFUL - the killers
the fifth studio album from brandon flowers + co has been called their strongest in over a decade. the frontman said the lead single, “the man,” was written through the lens of what his 20-something self thought it was to be a man..“being tough + bringing home the bacon, when really it’s about being compassionate + empathetic.”
For NME, Flowers shared that the lyrics of the album are “the most personal and bare” that he has ever been: “I’m looking in the mirror on this record and focusing a lot on my own personal experiences. Instead of just drawing upon all these experiences and maybe using them in other songs, I am going straight for it with this and singing about my life and my family and that’s something different for me.” The track “Rut” was inspired by the struggle of Flowers’ wife Tana with PTSD. He said: “Usually I feel protective of her but I decided to take it head on. So 'Rut’ is about her submitting to it. That doesn’t mean that she’s gonna let it beat her, but rather that she’s gonna finally acknowledge that it’s there and promise to break this cycle.” Flowers also added that putting his wife’s battle into a song helped him understand better what she is going through. “Have All the Songs Been Written?” was originally the subject line of an email Brandon Flowers sent to Bono, in the midst of a bout of writer’s block, before the latter suggested it would make an excellent song title.“
'wonderful wonderful’ is altogether driving + poignant + strong, intricately crafted for the artist + his listener.
* METAPHYSICAL - the technicolors
as soon as i experienced the technicolors–friends/labelmates/co-creators of the maine–live, i knew they would be in my life from that day forward. it seemed previous projects couldn’t quite capture the passion + enthusiasm of that short set, so 2017’s "metaphysical” was highly anticipated by many.
the title’s defined as “relating to the transcendent or to a reality beyond what is perceptible to the senses. beyond ordinary experience.” the aptly named project evokes a raw, ethereal energy that draws outside the lines, while remaining true to a rock solid focus. “sweat,” “imposter!” + “congratulations you’re a doll” would be welcome additions to any playlist, however it’s recommended listeners follow the sparkling sonic story from start to finish.
* CONCRETE + GOLD - foo fighters the ninth record from foo fighters is born + it is a freaking force. dave says it’s motörhead meets sgt. pepper’s. i sure do dig the super crunchy guitars + layered vocal melodies. paul mccartney plays drums + justin timberlake sings bgvs, just cause he wanted to + it makes me the happiest human.
“I feel an earthquake coming on,” Dave Grohl sings on “Dirty Water,” a moment of fragile guitar poetry from Foo Fighters’ ninth album. Of course, keeping things steady amid chaos has been one of Grohl’s signature themes since the Foos were born from the wreckage of Nirvana a couple of forevers ago. Musically and emotionally, Concrete and Gold is their most balanced record yet – from stadium-punk dive bombers like “Run” and “La Dee Da” to the acoustic soul that opens “T-Shirt,” in which Grohl gets his Nina Simone on, singing, “I don’t wanna be king/I just wanna sing a love song.” “Sunday Rain” is a guitar weeper so late-Beatles great it even has Paul McCartney playing drums on it.
Adele co-writer Greg Kurstin’s production adds big-studio texture without diluting the band’s raw tumult; even Justin Timberlake’s appearance – as a backing vocalist on the space-truckin’ “Make It Right” – is subtle rather than ostentatious. The highlight is “The Sky Is a Neighborhood,” a hulking dream-metal anthem: “Trouble to the right and left,” Grohl sings, driving into the darkness with a Bic lighter raised to the heavens.“ - Rolling Stone
* HALLOWEEN - ruston kelly
ruston kelly captured me, years ago, with the single release of his flawlessly raw, haunting "black magic.” ever since, like a ghost itself, the song was never far from me.
Rolling Stone writes, “Black Magic” is a crescendoing rocker that ponders the bewitching pull of romance –and how it can easily disappear in a cloud of smoke.“
"Kelly is just as adept at making catchy country grooves – Tim McGraw and Josh Abbott Band have cut his tracks –as he is capturing life’s darkest, most introspective moments. The songwriter’s debut EP, the Mike Mogis-produced Halloween, is a solemn meditation on the inevitable end of things, and the spirits that tend to haunt us. Kelly came to Tennessee as a last-minute decision after attending high school in Belgium (he jokes that his father might have been a spy). Once he landed in town, he held tenure in the jam band Elmwood and battled addiction, writing songs on Music Row while exploring his demons on Halloween and his forthcoming full-length. Current single "Black Magic” shows a powerful grasp on storytelling gleaned from his love of the Carter Family and Townes Van Zandt, but also a more ragged rock & roll soul: it’s Americana, if your Americana is Bruce Springsteen with an acoustic guitar, sung by someone who spins a little heavy metal too. “Sometimes I wear both a cowboy hat and a Slayer T-shirt, just to throw people off,” Kelly says.“
* REPUTATION - taylor swift
"hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you” at her core, i still believe taylor to be the fiercely strong, quietly brilliant songwriter she’s always been. the power of the song comes through when you strip it down + it still shines just as bright. thank you for making music that meets me where i am + takes me away, since that very first day, at fifteen (2006). thank you for this one + for playing it for jimmy fallon + his momma (go watch that performance + weep!) i look forward to growing into this record as i have the five that came before.. i’ve never doubted her prowess as a storyteller.. + i won’t start now.
see also: Rob Sheffield’s glorious write up. i wholeheartedly agree. https://www.rollingstone.com/music/albumreviews/taylor-swift-reputation-sheffield-review-most-intimate-lp-w511359
rob is my favorite RS writer/author on all-things music. from his books on life through the lens of pop music–bowie, beatles + duran duran songs, respectively, i wouldn’t trust anyone else’s TS review. he articulately captures how i feel, as a fan from album one.. i look forward to better understanding 'reputation’ with each spin, though i can’t help but miss the classic introspective ballads.
* DIVIDE - ed sheeran
a fantastically diverse record. once again, sheeran proves he can break all of the boundaries + stay true to himself as an artist. he does it all so well, without appearing to care what anyone else thinks. “dive” is a bold, beautiful statement i continue to come back to + feel just the same. the record punches + dances in all the right places, from beginning to end, begging to be played on repeat.
* LIFE CHANGES - thomas rhett
thomas rhett gifted us the quintessential road trip singalong soundtrack record of the year. the day after it was born was spent on a bus from chicago to nashville, so when it wasn’t playing through my earbuds, it was spinning on repeat in my mind. the title track still stands out clear + strong, though i thoroughly enjoyed a live taste of the addictive early maren morris duet–“craving you”–back in february on the hometeam tour. it’s no wonder his career has catapulted with his seamless versatility in blending country’s storytelling with pop music’s neverending ear candy likeablity. this record excellently showcases rhett’s range from anthemic radio jams to heartbreaker ballads and true-to-life tales in between.
* FROM A ROOM (vol 1 + 2) - chris stapleton
stapleton released music this year in two parts, dubbing them “from A room” volumes 1 + 2–not just any room, ���'A’ room” being nashville’s historic RCA studio A. some songs included in the collection were written up to a decade ago; ones chosen as they still ring true to the bearded, believable-as-they-come singer/songwriter.
on the authenticity of his craft, stapleton says, “I can’t really speak to why people like what we do. Hopefully, they know what we do is authentically us, and that goes over no matter what kind of music you’re playing. People will kind of hear that and connect with that in ways they wouldn’t if you were trying to be something that you think might be popular; I think that’s always a mistake in music, maybe even in life. Do something 'cause it’s in your heart, do something 'cause it’s what you’re supposed to be doing.”
“broken halos” + “second one to know” will, to me, always conjure up memories of seeing him open for tom petty and the heartbreakers at wrigley field, on their 40th anniversary tour, this summer. music is medicine and these honest-to-the-bone tunes are instant classics as well as a balm for the soul.
* FIRST CIGARETTE - travis meadows
“we rise. we climb. we shine like broken stars.”
the above is perhaps the defining statement of next-level nashville singer/songwriter, travis meadows’ 2017 studio album, 'first cigarette.’ the veteran of a different kind of war, there’s not much meadows hasn’t faced in life–cancer, heartbreak, addiction, depression.. and no story is off-limits for the wonderfully raw-voiced, honest-as-they-come artist. each song stays true to travis’ heart, some a little more uncomfortably authentic than accessible (ie radio-friendly), but that’s the way meadows prefers his craft.
“underdogs,” “pontiac,” “hungry,” + “better boat” stand out from first listen, yet each track was chosen to land where they do in the lineup + in the heart of the listener.
Rolling Stone writes, “To his most ardent fans and peers, including Eric Church, Dierks Bentley and Jake Owen, who have all cut Meadows’ songs for their respective albums, his open-book approach to his craft is his greatest gift. But Meadows lives in fear of rejection. That ever-lingering sense of distrust remains…
[On having label support backing a project for the first time]:
"It validates all of the suffering that I went through to get here,” Meadows says. “It gives it purpose.”
“I try not to be too hard on myself,” Meadows continues, “but I don’t deserve any of this. So I’m grateful for every inch I get walking that mile.”
* STEEL TOWN - steve moakler
steel town had only been out for nine days + i’d woken up with these songs in my head, every morning. i’m partial to “wheels” + “gold” + “summer without her” (co-written with + ft. my favorite-for-so-long, sarah buxton!!) + the title track, but i cannot pick a favorite, friends. the long wait from 'wide open’ to this one was oh-so-worth it. thanks for another heartfelt record filled with story songs i can spin for years + years to come. seriously, don’t sleep on this love letter to a historically hardworking hometown.
* BRETT ELDREDGE - brett eldredge
“Brett Eldredge’s self-titled third album is the Number One country album this week. The Illinois native also scored the highest all-genre chart position of his career, landing at Number Two on the Billboard 200, behind Kendrick Lamar’s LP Damn.” - Rolling Stone (August 15)
eldredge is both effortless + earnest, perfectly showcasing his ability + personality on the record he calls, “the most [himself].” from the playful first single, “somethin’ i’m good at” to the heartfelt vulnerability of “castaway,” listeners experience all-sides of the equal parts smooth sinatra, fun-loving country crooner. the standouts are story songs–“the long way” is dreamlike while “no stopping you” is wistful–both shine brilliantly on studio LP number three.
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jafreitag · 5 years ago
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Grateful Dead Monthly: Nassau Coliseum – Uniondale, NY 3/29/90
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On Thursday, March 29, 1990, the Grateful Dead played a show at Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum in Uniondale, New York.
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We’ve covered this venue before – GD 3/15/73, GD 5/14-16/80, Phish 4/2-3/98, and Phish 2/28/03. The Coliseum opened in 1972 on a former Army airfield seven miles east of Queens. It was the former home of the NBA’s New York Nets and the former/current home of the NHL’s New York Islanders. It’s an 18,000 capacity shed, not unattractive from outside, and one that has hosted some incredible shows.
3/29/90 is near the top of them.
In early 1990, the Dead were in good form. Archivist David Lemieux has called the band’s 25th Anniversary tour that spring “exceptional” and “really some of the best, and most consistently great, Grateful Dead music I ever saw.” Check out his seaside chat video regarding the Spring 1990 box set that features one show from each of the tour’s six stops.
Nassau Coliseum was the penultimate of those, and the band played a weeknight Wed-Thurs-Fri (or WTF) run there. The middle show is our focus here – “one of the all-time great[s],” according to the Grateful Dead of the Day blog. What makes it so great is the guest appearance of saxophonist Branford Marsalis.
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At the time, Branford was already well-established in the jazz community, featuring (along with his older brother Wynton) in an early-80s iteration of Art Blakey’s Jazz Messengers and popping up in bands led by Herbie Hancock and Miles Davis. And he gained notoriety in the rock idiom for his work on Sting’s 1985 solo debut, Dream of the Blue Turtles. But he wasn’t familiar with the Dead. In a 2014 Rolling Stone interview, he told scribe David Fricke, “Guys who play jazz and don’t only listen to jazz knew those guys.” Bradford only knew Truckin’. And the the lack of familiarity was mutual. According to GDOTD, “Before Branford showed up at the show, Phil was the only person in the band who knew who he was. Annie Uzdavinis, the Dead’s press person was cousins with Jim Lewi, a musician Branford was working on a project with. When Phil heard of the connection, he had Annie get in touch and invite Branford to the show.”
When asked in the RS interview about his first impressions upon arriving at the venue, Marsalis said:
“I walked backstage and Phil goes, ‘Hey, man, glad you could make it.’ The rest of the guys were like, ‘We don’t know who you are, but it’s nice to meet you.’ [Laughs] I came up for ‘Bird Song,’ and after the set was over, I said, ‘Thanks for letting me play, guys.’ And they’re like, ‘No, no, stay! Play the second half of the show. We’ll do Dark Star. That had no significance to me. I’m like, Dark Star? Okay. What is it? ‘Oh, you’re gonna love it. It’s free, it’s out.’ Great, I can play out. [Laughs] They start playing that lick, and the audience goes fucking bananas. Later, I started getting these phone calls on my private number: ‘Man, you were great last night. Thanks for getting them to play Dark Star. They haven’t played it in six months.’ I’m like, who are these people? . . . I had no context. I got people calling my house: ‘That was a fantastic show.’ Hey, how did you get this number? ‘We’re everywhere, man. But don’t worry about it. We’re harmless.’
I was an anthropologist that night, just checking this shit out. But it was a serious throwback to how I view music. There wasn’t a set list. They barely spoke to the audience. And the audience didn’t perceive that as disrespectful. The crowd was there to listen. When most people go to concerts, they say, ‘I’m going to see such-and-such.’ Dead fans – they went to hear the band.”
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Marsalis also spoke about the music itself:
“This wasn’t foreign territory. I’d already toured in Sting’s band. And I didn’t grow up just playing jazz. This was like going home. New Orleans is a culture where it’s all there. We don’t have those sharp divisions. With the Dead, I could imagine one guy as the folk guy, another as the jazz guy, someone as the rock guy. There was almost nothing they couldn’t play – and make the shit sound authentic. They were all listeners. There is a point where musicians who establish themselves stop listening to music and start listening to their own rhetoric. The Dead didn’t do that. It was obvious in the way they approached a song.
That 7/4 time [in Estimated Prophet] was not a big deal to a guy who plays jazz. Where jazz guys fuck up playing with pop and rock bands is they seem insulted by the simplicity. In the jazz guy’s world, there isn’t a song that exists that I can’t make better with my know-how.
The hardest thing to understand is that it doesn’t always need your innovation. The trick for me was not to go for all the little jazz styling. It’s about playing the song – what you hear instead of what you know. . . . The thing the Dead appreciated about me, if I can blow my own horn about anything, is that when I played with them, I was actually playing with them. I wasn’t just playing my thing.”
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And GDOTD adds:
For Branford, it was like the best jazz gigs where you can just jam without worrying about anything. [He said,] “When I agreed to sit in with the Dead in 1990, I didn’t know what to expect, aurally or visually. What I experienced was what I remembered music to be in my younger years, something that I’d felt was lost long ago. Process over product. No set lists, light shows and costumes required, but music first. It’s an experience I will always remember with great fondness.”
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So will we, and none more than LN editor, and head ‘head around here, ECM. He was at this show, and provides this recollection:
Has it really been 30 years since I was fortunate enough to see jazz saxophonist extraordinaire, Branford Marsalis, play with the Grateful Dead on March 29, 1990 at Nassau Coliseum?
This show has attained legendary status among Deadheads. It is held in the same conversation as some of the band’s greatest shows including the mighty Cornell. I’ve heard people refer to 3/29/90 as “the Cornell of the 90s.” Without getting too carried away with comparisons, I think we all can agree that it certainly is an exceptional moment in GD history. The stats certainly don’t lie…
There are no less than 5 official releases that contain 3/29/90:
Without A Net (1990) – “Eyes of the World”
Infrared Roses (1991) – “Drums” (i.e., “River of the Sorrows”) & “Space” (i.e., “Apollo at the Ritz”)
So Many Roads box set (1999) – Bird Song
Spring 1990 (The Other One) box set (2014) – the entire show
Wake Up To Find Out (2014) – the entire show
There are 21 different audio sources on LMA and the show has been downloaded a total of 335k+ times.
Many of the songs performed on 3/29/90 are among the most highly rated by fans on heady version.com:
“Bird Song” – Ranked #3 (after 8/27/72 and 6/22/73)
“Eyes of the World” – Ranked #2 (after 8/6/74)
“Estimated Prophet” – Ranked #7 overall; #1 of the entire 80s and 90s
“Dark Star” – Ranked #15 overall; #1 of the 1990s, #2 of the 80s & 90s behind 10/26/89 (Miami)
Having attended 3/29/90, my feelings are best described by John Dwork, who authored The Deadheads Taping Compendium:
This concert is what “IT” was all about – that all-too-rare “miracle show” one spent years pursuing. This was one of those events at which, with mutual ear-to-ear grins, we nodded to each other, knowing that what was happening would be remembered forever. It’s what the Deadhead’s “hero’s journey” is all about.
 Let’s dive into the show, shall we?
March 29, 1990 was the third of four shows I attended during the great Spring 1990 tour. The mind-blowing performances in Hartford (3/18) and Albany (3/24) were a clear sign that the band was playing the best they had since returning after Garcia’s near-death diabetic coma. The origin of this creative peak can be traced back to the previous fall when they busted out “Dark Star,” “Help>Slip,” “Attics” and “Death Don’t Have No Mercy” – songs that had been absent from the repertoire for many years. The Spring tour brought even more bust-outs with the return of “Loose Lucy” (3/14/90) and “Black-Throated Wind” (3/16/90), both of which were last played on 10/19/74. It was an exciting time to see the band. They were totally on top of their game, they knew it, and there was a sense among fans that “anything can happen.” And, on March 29, 1990, it did.
My brother’s best friend, Scott, picked me up at my office in New York City and we drove to Nassau Coliseum together. It was the first and only time I traveled to a Grateful Dead concert in a Porsche 911 – “Might as well travel the elegant way!” Of course the primary topic of conversation was the current Dead tour. Scott was a taper and had attended every show except the two nights at Copps Coliseum in Ontario. Since there was no internet back then, I was eager to hear about the opening night of Nassau which I had missed. The big news was the debut of “The Weight” along with the unusual placement of “Cumberland Blues” and “Hey Pocky Way” in the pre-drums slot of the second set. I was a little bummed that I missed “Loose Lucy” (which had been busted out in Landover earlier in the tour) along with the first “High Time” since 12/9/88 and the extremely rare cover of the Beatles, “Revolution” which was played a total of 11 times – this being the final performance.
Since Scott planned to record the entire Spring tour, he asked all of his friends to request “Taper’s Tickets” by mail order. I was the fortunate friend of his who scored Taper’s Tickets for the March 29th  show. Scott had gotten excellent seats via mail order in the lower level, dead center behind the soundboard so I gladly exchanged my tickets with him. For the initiated, let’s just say that the Taper’s Section can be a little intense. However, I am extremely grateful for the work they did to document the concert experience of the Grateful Dead.
We arrived at Nassau Coliseum around 4 PM and met up with my brother, Dan, and some friends to take in the “Shakedown” scene in the parking lot which was low-key compared with other venues. Nassau had a bad reputation for harsh treatment of Deadheads and the unusually high number of arrests by the Nassau County Police. It was so bad in fact that the Dead refused to play Nassau for a long time. This was their first trip back since 1985. Many fans actually boycotted these shows for that reason which resulted in lots of extra tickets. The word was that you couldn’t give tickets away on the first night of the run. The great performance from the previous night caused some fans to re-think the boycott but there were still plenty of tickets available for the 29th.
We settled into our seats and waited with great anticipation for the band to take the stage. The opening combo of “Jack Straw” > “Bertha” was a big crowd pleaser but I remember not feeling the same energy that most of the people around me felt. I am probably in the minority with this view but from my perspective the first set was pretty average up until the “golden moment.” In fact, when I listen to it today, I still sense that the band was a little restrained. Perhaps they were holding back for the musical guest who was waiting behind stage.
After the band finished “Masterpiece” there was a pause and then Weir approached the microphone to make an announcement: “Well ok, we’ve got a special guest tonight.” The crowd noise swelled at this unexpected turn of events. Garcia peeled off a practice run on the riff of “Bird Song” but there was still no sign of a guest. Weir attempted to avert the awkward confusion with humor by adding: “…I think.”  And then out of the shadows appeared the jazz great, Branford Marsalis with soprano saxophone in hand. Stumbling a bit over his name, Weir formally introduced him: “Y’all wanna welcome Branford Marsalis.”
I can attest to the fact that most people in the audience did not know who Branford Marsalis was. I certainly didn’t. In fact, nobody in the Grateful Dead even knew who he was except Phil Lesh. Annie Uzdavinis, the Dead’s press person was cousins with Jim Lewi, a musician Branford was working on a project with. When Phil heard of the connection, he had Annie get in touch and invite Branford to the show. For that matter, Branford had never heard any Grateful Dead songs until he stepped on stage with the band. The next day, he allegedly went to Tower Records and purchased the entire GD catalogue. Another interesting tidbit about Branford’s appearance is that he was supposed to play with the band on March 24th at Knickerbocker Arena in Albany but due to scheduling conflicts he couldn’t make it so it was rescheduled for March 29th at Nassau Coliseum.
Anyway, after Weir introduced Branford I saw a lot of shoulder shrugs and people huddled together trying to figure out who the mystery man with the sax was. The last name, Marsalis, sounded familiar because of his brother, Wynton, the great jazz trumpet player. Some people vaguely remembered that Branford played with Sting’s jazz-influenced solo band when the bass player left The Police in 1985. Needless to say, there was a lot of head scratching and even some cause for concern because musical guests generally were a disaster for a Grateful Dead concert. The last person to join the band on saxophone was Clarence Clemons and that collaboration was met with very mixed results. Moreover, musical guests at a Grateful Dead concert in general meant less jamming and less getting weird which were the very reasons we obsessively followed this band around the country. However, those fears would quickly be dispelled. We were about to get our faces melted and nobody saw it coming. With that, Garcia led the band into one of the finest versions of “Bird Song” ever played. The way Branford used his tenor and soprano saxophone to add texture and counterpoints to elevate this jam is otherworldly. Amazingly, it sounds as if he had been playing with the Dead for years.
John Dwork describes the moment with poetic perfection in The Deadhead’s Taping Compendium:
“Bird Song” establishes that Branford can talk the Grateful Dead language. The interplay goes back and forth, going higher and higher. Jerry and Branford, twin flames dancing above the same candle. This is not a massive psychedelic storm. This “Bird Song” does not melt or even drip. It is a gentle dream of consciousness poem. It is zen in motion – like the water in a mountain stream gently laughing as it dances on its way.
A very hot “Promised Land” follows – it’s a sort of celebration of the “Bird Song” and Branford’s presence. As the house lights went on at set break, I looked around the audience and saw lots of smiles about what had gone down. Supposedly, the band was even more excited. Many of us in the audience assumed that Branford’s appearance on “Bird Song” was a one-shot deal and that he would not return for the second set. Apparently Branford had assumed the same thing. The story goes that he was already beginning to pack up his instrument when the boys in the band prevailed on getting him to play the rest of the show and told them that they wanted to play “Dark Star” with him. Branford recalled the experience:
They said “Hey, let’s play Dark Star – we hadn’t played that in a while.” I was like “Oh, I don’t know the song.” They said “Oh, you’ll love it. It’s right up your alley.”
The crowd roared as the lights dimmed for the second set and Branford appeared on stage again. With that, they launched into the now immortal version of “Eyes of the World.” Opening any set with “Eyes” was extremely rare so the band must have really been excited to play it. The jazzy chords and open space make it a perfect choice for their guest to shine. There were two things I distinctly remember sticking out: (1) the beautiful lighting that accompanied this performance – luscious and serene colors of purple and green bathed the stage and audience; and (2) the slower, more deliberate tempo than usual. For years the band had favored a speedy tempo so this was a very welcome change. It was almost a throw-back to the great versions from the 1973-74 era. For 16-minutes, we were treated to delightful extended jams – Jerry and Branford trading solos. At one point Jerry began using a MIDI Choral/Flute combo and continued a theme that Branford had been playing with his sax. As one reviewer commented, “it sounded like angels were flying into the Nassau Coliseum.”
After an extended final “Eyes” jam, Jerry switches over to his Mu-Tron. After a few saxophone and keyboard flourishes, the music gently washes out and slowly comes to a very brief pause. The drummers tap on their high-hat’s to count in the next song – “Estimated Prophet.” Whoa! Talk about switching things up! This was a major switch from the usual sequence of the classic combo, “Estimated > Eyes.” A quick check revealed that the band performed it this way only twice before – 11/4/77 (Colgate) and 11/5/79 (Spectrum). I didn’t realize at the time just how rare this was. By now, Branford was so comfortable playing with the Dead that he begins soloing within 8 seconds of the start of the song. But he doesn’t just solo, he DEVOURS it. It’s quite impressive when you consider how quirky “Estimated” is with its odd 7/8 time signature and the unusual chord choices – F# minor and B minor. This version of “Estimated” is incredible save for a minor hiccup when Bobby prematurely ends the “California” jam before Garcia is ready. It’s a very subtle flub that is hardly noticeable which is a testament to how well-oiled this band was.
I would be remiss if I didn’t give special recognition to Brent who laid down some of his finest and funkiest keyboard work ever during Bobby’s rave-out segment. Behind Weir’s shrieks, Branford’s riffs create a syncopated, rhythmic dance while Brent bounces on and off beat. To this day I am unable to stop my body from involuntarily gyrating when I listen to this magical interplay. Branford takes the first solo and my God is it smooth and dripping with soul. He passes the ball to Garcia who has his Mu-Tron dialed in and ready to go. The mood instantly changes to a smoky and spacey realm.
The “Estimated” jam gracefully drifts into a segue opportunity. Garcia noodles, hinting ever so subtly at “IT.” Tension filled the air and the audience fell silent as we held our collective breath, hoping and praying for the only song that made sense at this time and at this place but none of us dare said it. In fact, many of us (me included) wondered whether “Dark Star” was even a possibility. The band had played it only four times in1989 – all on the Fall Tour. Was it just a “Warlocks” novelty song that had been retired, never to surface again? Nobody was dancing anymore. Everybody was frozen as we hung on to Garcia’s every note. My brother, who was standing next to me, put his hand on my shoulder with anticipation. A few descending notes later…a brief silent pause… and then….they played it! “Dark Star!” Nassau Coliseum exploded. Having recently experienced the crowd reaction to “Dark Star” at the Meadowlands on 10/16/89, which was deafening, I can assertively say that the reaction to the Nassau “Star” was even more intense because it was totally unexpected.  Here’s what Branford had to say about it:
They started playing the song and the audience went absolutely ape s–t. They went bananas. I’m looking at them going bananas and I’m going “OK, this must be an anthem.”
For those who enjoy stats, the transition from “Estimated” into “Dark Star” was yet another unique song sequence for the band. In fact, this was the first time that happened. It was also the first “Dark Star” of the 90’s and it is easily the best of the decade and quite possibly the best since 1974.
The band stayed close to the main theme for the first five minutes. The mood of the music mirrored the audience’s reaction – joyful and celebratory. However, after dispensing of the first verse, what followed was 11 minutes of the most outside, exploratory music I’ve ever heard. The band took a deep dive into the cosmos of the psychedelic, acid-jazz universe, pursuing a multitude of themes. The interplay between the musicians was astounding. The entire band rose to the challenge, and then raised the bar. It was like nothing I had ever seen before or again.
Here is what Branford had to say about jamming with the Dead:
The Dead were a 60s rock band. It was almost impossible to have a rock band in the 60s that wasn’t influenced by jazz. Not that they were going to be going to be great jazz musicians but they grew up listening to that kind of music so it was a very improvisatory, experimental nature to the way they played. It was very interesting to be on the stage with them….The first time I played with them at Nassau Coliseum it was a very special night. It was really on.
Here is what Branford had to say about playing with Garcia:
It was a joy to play with him and it was actually more of a joy to listen to him…Musically, he meant business, man. He didn’t smile much when he was on stage. When he and I would hook up on a little line and he would give me a little sly grin. It was like that jazz thing…a returning acknowledgment, a little achievement, a little success but then it was back to the matter at hand.
You can watch the entire interview with Branford from 1996 on YouTube:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GnnoHPFMs3U
The rest of the show was gravy. The re-entry into “Dark Star” out of “Space” was perfect as was the gentle segue into “The Wheel.” Although the band skipped the “ballad” song on this particular evening, how could anybody possibly complain after all of the magic that had occurred already? Bobby led a strong version of “Throwing Stones” and instead of automatically defaulting to “Not Fade Away” which the band had gotten accustomed to, they wisely opted for “Lovelight” which afforded Branford an opportunity to show off his rock n’ roll chops.
“Knocking on Heaven’s Door” was simply gorgeous and served as the perfect palate cleanser for this evening of long and complex jams.
The comments by Jim Lind on jerrygarcia.com sum up my feelings as the show ended and the house lights came on:
I don’t believe I ever saw Garcia as happy as he appeared to be on this night as the smile on his face throughout the show made it clear that he understood what the other 20,000 people in the building had come to realize; what was happening here was something special. As the house lights came on after the encore, 20,000, in unison, let out an incredibly loud, appreciative cheer. As we exited, I took delight in seeing the look of bewilderment on so many faces as if they were asking, “Did that really just happen?”
My brother and I met up with Scott and a bunch of other friends in the parking lot. Big smiles, high-fives and hugs were everywhere. We drove to Scott’s beach house in Quogue and partied all night listening to his recording of the show we had just attended. It is something I will never forget.
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You can pretend that you’re next to Ed and watch the whole show on a fan-shot YouTube HERE.
As Ed mentioned, the Eyes of the World from this show first appeared on the live album Without a Net that documented the Fall ’89 and Spring ’90 tours. The whole show was later released as Wake Up to Find Out. As an official release, it’s on Spotify. Here’s the widget:
If you’re not a Spotify person (aside: why?), Ed did the legwork on alt sources from the Live Music Archive and Relisten.org. Here are the links:
LMA (SBD Source) – https://archive.org/details/gd90-03-29.sbd.miller.26341.sbeok.shnf
Re-Listen (SBD): https://relisten.net/grateful-dead/1990/03/29?source=97979
LMA (AUD Source) – https://archive.org/details/gd1990-03-29.nak300.andrewf.83612.flac16/gd1990-03-29d2t04.flac
Re-Listen (AUD) – https://relisten.net/grateful-dead/1990/03/29?source=124361
LMA (Matrix Source) – https://archive.org/details/gd1990-03-29.mtx.hansokolow.97118.flac16
Re-Listen (Matrix Source) – https://relisten.net/grateful-dead/1990/03/29?source=97672
More soon.
JF
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thisweekingundamwing · 7 years ago
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August 5 - August 12 Weekly Round-up!
Hello lovely GW fans!
It’s everyone’s favorite day of the week - the day of the week where you get all kinds of Gundam Wing creations linked in one super awesome post.
Don’t forget to show these amazing creators some love for all their creativity and hard work!
OH! Also, please tag us in anything GW related that you think other fans will enjoy. We do search AO3 for fics but anything specific to tumblr can get lost in the tags (or somehow tumblr eats it and it’s lost to the void).
Have a wonderful week and enjoy!
- Mod Maeve
Fanfiction:
Just as a quick side note, be sure to read the warnings listed on AO3 before reading because I may have missed some!
@amberlyinviolet​ - Knife in Hand, Chapter 21 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/6068848/chapters/26407083 
Chapter Summary: The Russian honeymoon continues. I'm gonna be honest with you guys: the next four chapters are roughly 75% smut and these two idiots working out their relationship issues. Which I think we all agree is very important! But the plot is still there, and once the honeymoon is over, whooooo boy. There's gonna be a whole lot of action, of a very different kind. 
Paring: 2x3. 
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage.
@anaranesindanarie - Happy Birthday 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11757804 
Summary: Birthday Fic! Happy Birthday!!
@claraxbarton​
Ready for You 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11763066/chapters/26516211 
Summary: A chance meeting ten years after the war leads Duo and Trowa down an unexpected path. Birthday fic for Kangofu-CB. 
Pairings: 2x3.
The Road Not Taken
 http://archiveofourown.org/works/11743851/chapters/26464809 
Summary: What happens when a gay man answers the classified ad of a straight man?A mild-roast love story.Originally written and posted in 2014 on ff.net. Rewrite (more like a polish) in progress. 
Pairings: 2x3, 1x5, 3x1, 3x4, 6x2. 
@chronicwhimsy - Saudade, Chapter 6 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11352189/chapters/26539068 
Series Summary: Duo and Trowa travel through Europe with the circus during the summer after the Barton uprising. Mentions of underage sex and drinking, unhealthy coping mechanisms. 
Pairings:  3x4, 2+3 bromance. 
Warnings: Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Mentions of Underage Sex, Underage Drinking.
ConsSunshine58 - Broken Memories, Chapter 5 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11545908/chapters/26434542 
Chapter Summary:  Truckin' along. More Yuy-Maxwell Family Feels for sure. Another chapter or two before they get home--this one is longer, but chapter 6 will be short. A bit of medical squick in the first part of this chapter, be warned! I'm trying to stay as true to real life as possible, so that means some uncomfortable stuff, but it's almost over! Hang in there, Duo! 
Pairings: 1x2 and 3x4. 
Warnings: Hand Jobs, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Memory Loss.
DarkBluePhoenix - Neon Genesis Evangelion: Legacy – Gundam Invasion
http://archiveofourown.org/works/10464375  
Summary: A Mobile Suit Gundam Wing and Mobile Fighter G Gundam CrossoverIt’s a Gundam! *RANDOM EXPLOSION!* The cast of Gundam Wing meet our young heroes and befriend them in this tale of how those who understand, those who fight, those who doubt, and those who pass by, can claim victory against the forces of evil reborn. Mission Accepted. All systems go! Gundams… Evangelions… Launching!
Diana_Lua - Acordando 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11730744 
Summary:  "Eu posso ver claramente agora, eu posso ver as regras do mundo. As funções da vida. O dever dos fortes. Não existe segredo nisso. Não existe segredo algum quando você está acordando.Nós estamos pegamos fogo, então, deixe queimar…" 
Karen - Alliance in Blood
http://www.mwotw.com/moon/aib13.html
A three to five fic series about Duo and his adventures with the supernatural because of his relationship with a werewolf. Supernatural AU. 
Pairing: 5x2, 3x4. 
Warnings: Violence. R/NC-17.   
@kangofu-cb - Mission: Redacted, Chapter 14, (Mod note: THE FINAL CHAPTER!!!!! ) 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/10872516/chapters/26495907 
Series Summary: Post-war, Une has been selected to direct the new Preventers Organization. Unfortunately, following government directives of disarmament and pacifism, criminal enterprises have sprung up, escalating crime and violence. Searching for a solution, she brainstorms a team of off-the-books operatives tasked with protecting the peace at all costs.Meanwhile, the pilots are all dealing with peace and the scars of war in their own ways, not all of them healthy... 
Pairings: 2x5, background 3x4 and RxD.
@ladyjstruth-blog - Hard Line, Chapter 5 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/10901946/chapters/26430144 
Series Summary:  It's been nine years after the Eurussian Incident and the Earth Sphere Unified Nation continues to experience peace through communication and cooperation. Quatre Raberba Winner, while finishing his doctoral thesis in engineering at MIT in Boston, reconnects with his friend and ex-boyfriend, Trowa Barton. A romantic flame is rekindled while an old enemy plots his revenge. 
Pairings: 3x4, 2xH, 1xR. 
luvsanime02 - Maneuvers, Chapter 6,  
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11385195/chapters/26430177 
Series Summary: Heero and Relena are ready to start up their business. Their first client? Dorothy Catalonia.This is the sixth story in Navigation, a fem!Heero series.
@miss-m-muses - Life of the Party 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11781054 
Summary: Zechs is always the life of the party among the Sanc elite as he represents the acceptable face of OZ. Yet he hides a secret, as he always has. 
Pairing: 6x2. 
Warnings: Angst, Sexual Content, OZ won AU.
@morbidbirdy - Worth the Fight 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11761563 
Summary: Wufei wakes up after an accident to find the least likely person sitting in his hospital room. He realizes he's made a mistake and that some thing are worth fighting for. 
Pairing: 5xOriginal Male Character.
@nekoflashficcing
Eye for an eye 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11782431 
Summary: The TRC!GW AU I've just recently realized I've wanted to write but nobody asked for. A snippet where Trowa snaps and fights Duo for his magic. 
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence and Body Horror.
Boyband
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11767917 
Summary:  “Rock band turned idol boy band” trope AU. 
panther3751 - Heavy 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11751480
Summary: the things we carry with us, outside and after battle. 
Pairing: Zechs Merquise & Lucrezia Noin. 
Warning: PTSD.
Strawberrywaltz - The Forgotten, Chapter 2  
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11686344/chapters/26307213 
Summary: The entire universe thinks that Quatre Winner is dead, but when Heero starts having strange black outs he begins to realize the rumors of Quatre's death might not be true. 
Pairings:  4x1, 4xOriginal Male Character(s), Past 3x4. 
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Temporary Character Death, Temporary Amnesia, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Post-Series, Slow Burn.
@the-indomitable-bhg ( Sanyukumiko (BHG) ) - Uh Oh, ZERO 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11783634/chapters/26571666 
Summary: After losing something important to Heero, Duo enlists the help of Wufei, Trowa and Quatre to get it back before the Wing pilot notices.
@the-indomitable-bhg and @morbidbirdy 
End of Line, Chapter 15 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/10833834/chapters/26486106 
Series Summary: The Grid, the legendary Tron System, has always intrigued Duo Maxwell. After years of dreaming and months of tireless work, he finally receives the final part he needs to unlock the door to the digital frontier. A blast of a digitizing laser later he finds himself in the world of his dreams. However, soon that dream becomes a nightmare as he comes to realize that his existence in this new world is both a danger to him and to the programs who reside there. With the help of Security Program Trowa and a mysteriously damaged and glitchy program named Heero, he embarks on a journey through The Grid to seek help from a mysterious entity known as the Gatekeeper. Will he be able to get out of the Tron System, or will the organizations who are hunting him manage to derez him first? 
Pairing: 3x1, 3x4.
Something About Us, Chapter 19, 
http://archiveofourown.org/works/11333262/chapters/26486007, 
Series Summary: Five Years after Operation Meteor the fragile peace between Earth and the colonies is once again threatened when a beloved prominent political figure is assassinated. The former Gundam pilots come together again for a new mission, which forces unexplored feelings to arise between Heero and Trowa. 
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Slash, Post-Endless Waltz, Post-Canon, Action & Romance, Missions, Mobile Suits, Preventers (Gundam Wing) 
Pairing: 3x1.
Fanart: 
@avaantares - Paper Currency Graphic Design
http://avaantares.tumblr.com/post/163907249353/oh-man-flashback-to-that-time-in-one-of-my
@beccaboo8810 - In-progress custom Preventer’s Patch (04) sketch 
https://beccaboo8810.tumblr.com/post/163873265405/progress-it-all-needs-cleaned-up-big-time-and-the
@chronicwhimsy - Duo Maxwell Sketch 
http://chronicwhimsy.tumblr.com/post/164074303142/my-boy
@detectivesinc - Monet in space 
http://detectivesinc.tumblr.com/post/163988822139/monet-in-space
@endlesschaosart - Trowa Barton in The Fall in-progress pic 
https://endlesschaosart.tumblr.com/post/164038120251/still-in-progress-but-i-have-to-go-to-bed-now
@gundam-wing-crossovers - GW/Cardcaptor Sakura crossover sketch
https://gundam-wing-crossovers.tumblr.com/post/163842169564/what-did-you-do-today-i-drew-terrorists-into-a
Cosplay: 
@manabingu - Metrocon 2017 cosplay pictures 
http://manabingu.tumblr.com/post/163934284351/metrocon-2017-cosplay-highlights 
http://manabingu.tumblr.com/post/163968226111/got-to-meet-some-old-and-new-friends-at-metrocon
Calendar Events:
End of Summer Tropes Block Party by @gwblockparty
Posting September 1st - 4th
A fanworks celebration of all things tropey and cliche!
Gundam Wing Eve War Event by @gw-evewar
(Saturday) December 23, 2017 - (Sunday) December 24, 2017
Open Science Fiction Themed Event
event will be observing Universal Coordinated Time (UTC)
Submissions: Fanfiction, Meta essays, Personal Headcanon, Fan Art
Rules: All works must feature a science fiction theme. Alternate Universes, and cross-over fiction are welcome. There are no limits to characters, pairings, audience rating, time frame or universe.
To participate please check @gw-evewar for participation information. 
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maleksrami · 5 years ago
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we all took naps til 9pm on this Monday. but how are u lovely?
im ok!!!! i have such blah feelings about summer time...it’s puts me in a weird mood so im already over it. also I have family staying at my house all month so my space feels little uhhh invaded so I just 🙃 im truckin along
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longliverockback · 1 year ago
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Deep Purple The Complete Albums 1970-1976 [Box Set] 2013 Rhino ————————————————— Tracks Disc One: Concerto for Group and Orchestra 1. First Movement: Moderato; Allegro; Vivace 2. Second Movement: Andante 3. Third Movement: Vivace; Presto
Tracks Disc Two: In Rock 1. Speed King 2. Bloodsucker 3. Child in Time 4. Flight of the Rat 5. Into the Fire 6. Living Wreck 7. Hard Lovin’ Man
Tracks Disc Three: Fireball 1. Fireball 2. No No No 3. Strange Kind of Woman 4. Anyone’s Daughter 5. The Mule 6. Fools 7. No One Came
Tracks Disc Four: Machine Head 1. Highway Star 2. Maybe I’m a Leo 3. Pictures of Home 4. Never Before 5. Smoke on the Water 6. Lazy 7. Space Truckin’
Tracks Disc Five: Made in Japan 1. Highway Star 2. Child in Time 3. Smoke on the Water 4. The Mule 5. Strange Kind of Woman 6. Lazy 7. Space Truckin’
Tracks Disc Six: Who Do We Think We Are 1. Woman from Tokyo 2. Mary Long 3. Super Trouper 4. Smooth Dancer 5. Rat Bat Blue 6. Place in Line 7. Our Lady
Tracks Disc Seven: Burn 1. Burn 2. Might Just Take Your Life 3. Lay down, Stay Down 4. Sail Away 5. You Fool No One 6. What’s Goin’ on Here 7. Mistreated 8. “A” 200
Tracks Disc Eight: Stormbringer 1. Stormbringer 2. Love Don’t Mean a Thing 3. Holy Man 4. Hold On 5. Lady Double Dealer 6. You Can’t Do It Right (with the One You Love) 7. High Ball Shooter 8. The Gypsy 9. Soldier of Fortune
Tracks Disc Nine: Come Taste the Band 1. Comin’ Home 2. Lady Luck 3. Gettin’ Tighter 4. Dealer 5. I Need Love 6. Drifter 7. Love Child 8. This Time Around · Owed to “G” 9. You Keep Moving
Tracks Disc Ten: Made in Europe 1. Burn 2. Mistreated 3. Lady Double Dealer 4. You Fool No One 5. Stormbringer —————————————————
* Long Live Rock Archive
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au-universes · 8 years ago
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Convoy Pt 3 (Convoy AU)
They reached the town with no issue.  The cops seemed to have completely lost their trail, and Dean was perfectly happy with that.  The town, Jeddo, was just east of Grants.  It was small, and contained very little.  There was a drug store, diner, and a motel on the main road and a few smaller stores scattered through the rest of town.  The entire town had that wore down feeling to it, like it was dying, or in the process of becoming a ghost town.
Dean, Cas, and Sam parked their trucks just outside of town and walked towards the diner on foot.  They decided Cas and Sam would go into town to buy supplies and to see if they could find something to fix the window in Sam’s truck.  Dean and Charlie were to go to the diner to meet up with Captain and Plaid Pants.
Dean and Charlie strode into the diner.  It was nearly empty, except for a bored looking hostess filing her nails and two young men seated in the back corner.  Dean nodded to the hostess and walked to their table, Charlie following his lead.
On their way to the diner, Dean had agreed to hide Charlie’s identity for her.  She knew if word got out that the infamous Widow Woman was back, it could cause more trouble for the truckers than they were already in.  She just hoped Dean would stay true to his word.
They sat down across from the two truckers, saying their hellos.  One of them was wearing a pair of flannel pants, with a red plaid pattern across them. He was wearing a t-shirt that depicted two chickens with the words “Los Pollos Hermanos” across it.  Charlie assumed he must be Plaid Pants.  He didn’t look very threatening, but Captain was another story.  He had the look that said “I can and will rip your face off,” and Charlie was suddenly very happy they were on their side.
They introduced themselves as Steve and Jimmy.  They mostly stayed in New Mexico, on what they considered their home turf.  They, along with a few other truckers from Jimmy’s crew, ruled the roads of New Mexico. They were willing to help Sam reach Texas, however, because they too had a long standing feud with Saruman and his goons.  And because they had nothing better to do.
“So, were is Sam?” Jimmy asked after Dean explained what had been going on.
“He’s with Cas, getting supplies,” Dean said.  “His truck’s got a busted window”
Jimmy muttered under his breath, “careless.”
“It was shot out by a cop.”
“A good trucker should always put his truck first, and that’s that.”
Dean scowled.  This was not going to be an enjoyable trip.
 Dean and Charlie paid then left the diner, setting out to meet Sam and Cas back at their trucks.  Jimmy and Steve had to go and get their trucks, then they would meet them. When Dean and Charlie got there, Sam was nearly done replacing the window in his truck, and Cas was loading his truck with the supplies.
Jimmy and Steve showed up soon after.  They introduced themselves to Cas and Sam.  Jimmy talked to Cas far too long for Deans liking.  The sooner they got to Texas, the better.
                 The six truckers made their way out of New Mexico with no trouble from the police.  That was the good side to having Jimmy around, he owned New Mexico.  The bad side was he would not stop flirting.
               It didn’t matter that Cas and Sam were in relationships and that Charlie was a lesbian, Jimmy would not back down.  Sam thought he was doing it subconsciously, but Dean wasn’t sure.  The only person he didn’t flirt with was Dean, and he didn’t know whether to be relieved or offended.  What was really confusing, however, was that Jimmy and Steve seemed to have some sort of relationship, yet Jimmy would still flirt.  It made Dean sick.  He would never do that to Cas, and Cas was true to Dean.  So what was Jimmy’s problem?
                 It was when they first crossed the border into Texas when they heard the news.  Dean, Sam, and Cas had become folk heroes in the eyes of the truckin’ community. There was not a trucker in the southern states who hadn’t had a run in with Saruman, and when they heard about Dean’s heroic actions helping Charlie in the diner and the purpose for their mission, they started to praise him as a hero of sorts.  Most of the truckers knew where they were headed, and occasionally a truck or two would join their convoy for a few miles then head off in a different direction, which was a way of showing their support.
               The governor of New Mexico had even heard the tales.  Many people thought she would be on the side of the cops, but she surprised everyone by fully supporting the truckers.
               “Of course I’ve heard about the convoy,” said Governor Kara when asked about the situation.  “From what I’ve heard, the only crime they’re guilty of is standing up for their friend against some corrupted cops.  They’re just trying to get home.  I say we help them find their way.”
               The cops had also heard these tales, but they treated Dean and the truckers as villains rather than the heroes the governor and the trucking community made them out to be.  They spent long days and nights dodging the cops, sometimes successfully, sometimes not so much.  They needed to be in Dallas within the week, Ezri was due any day now.
               They were headed south down 287 when a couple of cops started trailing them.  Dean told his crew to ignore them and keep going, they couldn’t afford any more delays. The cop cars soon doubled in number, then tripled.  There was twelve cop cars following them now, sirens strangely silent in the humid Texas air. The cops moved to surround the convoy, hoping to cut them off.
               “Keep moving!” Dean said over the CB.  “Let’s drop the hammer on these bears.”
               Dean and Jimmy sped ahead on the two lane highway, followed by Steve, then Cas and Sam.
               Then, Dean saw him.  Out of his rear view mirror, Dean spotted Saruman, driving his car, murder written across his face.
               “Shit, he’s here,” Dean said to Charlie.  “Saruman’s here.”                                  
               “What’re you going to do?”
               “Anything I can.”  Dean turned to his CB.  “Papa bear’s here, and he’s looking for trouble.”
               “10-4 Rubber Duck, I see him,” said Steve through the radio.
               “What do we do?” said Cas.
               Dean gazed thoughtfully off into the distance before responding.  “Let’s give ‘em hell.”
               That was all it took.  The five trucks started their rampage, speeding up and slowing down, slamming on the brakes and making the road treacherous for the tiny cop cars. Dean managed to run a few off the road by himself, causing them to flip or to lose control.  Jimmy, who was a bit in front of Dean, nudged a cop car directly into Dean’s path causing him to hit it head on at full speed.  He heard the sickening crunch of the car beneath his tires.
               “Look!” came Sam’s voice over the CB.  “They’re retreating!”
               Dean checked his rearview mirrors.  Sam was right, the few cars that were still in working condition were slowing down, escaping the convoy.  All of the cops except…
               “Saruman!  He’s still here,” Dean said.
               Sheriff Saruman was not one to give up so easily. He steadily followed the convoy, siren blaring.  He sped between Sam and Cas, then past Steve.  He inched his way in between Dean and Jimmy’s trucks.  His window was lowered, and he was yelling something up at the truckers, but they couldn’t hear him, and they didn’t care what he had to say.
               Jimmy’s voice came over the CB.  “Rubber Duck, we need to make roadkill of this bear.”
               “10-4 Captain, what’s the plan?”
               “Stay next to me, let me do the tricky part. Keep your speed.”
               Slowly, Jimmy’s truck crept closer and closer to Dean’s, trapping Saruman in between them.  Steve had blocked the back, and Saruman had nowhere to go.  Jimmy kept creeping closer to Dean, closing the space between the trucks.
               Saruman didn’t even have his gas pedal down.  The two trucks sandwiching him on either side were pushing him along.  Every second the trucks got closer together, compacting the car in on either side. Smoke was rising from the hood.
               Saruman knew if they were to keep pushing him along like this, he would certainly die.  He flipped off his siren as a sign of his surrender.  The trucks let up their hold on him and sped past, leaving Saruman to sit in the crushed and smoking car on the highway.
                 After that incident, the convoy had no trouble reaching Dallas.  They arrived by the next day, and Sam was with his wife at noon.  Jimmy and Steve left shortly afterwards, needing to get back to New Mexico to continue their rein.  Dean left Sam and Cas at Ezri’s house and went to drop Charlie off.
               Charlie told Dean she had friends in Dallas she was going to stay with before leaving for Mexico.
               “It’s about time I got out of the country,” she explained while Dean drove through the streets of Dallas.  “I mean, it’s not easy being wanted in four states.”
               “Five states,” Dean corrected.
               “Right!  I always forget Michigan.”
               “Don’t we all.”
               “It’s up here on the left.”
               Dean pulled into an abandoned parking lot.  He stopped his truck and hopped out, then walked around and opened the door for Charlie.  She slid out of the truck and landed next to Dean.
               “There’s no one here,” Dean said, looking around.
               “I’ve got a bit to walk, I wasn’t allowed to bring you directly to their hiding place.”
               “Right.”
               Charlie paused.  “I want to thank you.  For the ride, and, well, everything else.  It’s been a long time since I’ve been in a truck, and it’s been a long time since I’ve been the Widow Woman.  I gave up truckin’ for a reason.  To stay safe.  That Saruman’s a character, and a real dick.  If I could, I’d stay and help you fight him.  But it’s about time I left this life behind me.  I want to look for a new life in Mexico.  I miss Arwen a hell of a lot, but it’s time to let her go, move on.  Being with you has made me realize that.  Seeing Sam with his family made me realize how much I miss having a family.  It’s time I find a new one.”  Charlie enveloped Dean into a tight hug.  “I love you.”
               “I know.”
                Dean sat in his truck, still in the parking lot he left Charlie in.  She had walked away a while ago, but she left Dean with his thoughts.  Trucking was dangerous, dangerous as sin, but Dean had never considered quitting.  It was his life.  But if anything were to ever happen to Cas… he didn’t know how Charlie could stand it.
               Dean started up his truck, fully intending to head back to Sam’s.  As he pulled out of the parking lot, a voice sounded over the CB radio.
               “Rubber Duck!”
               “Love Machine?” Dean responded.  “What wrong?”
               “Saruman’s here.  He’s got Sam.”
By: Luci
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mysphera · 5 years ago
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MySphera Artist Spotlight - Kendra & The Bunnies
Kendra & The Bunnies are LA's newest music rage and we are loving the ENERGY! Lead singer and songwriter, Kendra Muecke shared a little more insight into what brought this musical project to life and where it's headed now!
What was the last concert you attended that wasn't your own?
Experiencing live music is truly something that moves my soul. The sense of community that arises through shared moments of concert creates understanding amongst us. I really dig that. This family-feeling of a grooving atmosphere is relevant to the Dead & Company concerts I attended at the Hollywood Bowl in June. I enjoy the melodic, bluesy direction that the band is truckin’ towards. It calls for swaying in the breeze and waving a flag of open hearts.
Who are your top 3 new/ modern bands?
Animal Collective is a favorite of mine. They are very influential to my way of hearing music through their usage of experimental transitions in pitch. The song “Chores” into “For Reverend Green” on the album, “Strawberry Jam”, always gets me thinking between the creative lines. I have also met them a couple times, good people. For sonic variation and life-changing live performances, I rely on Phish. The amount of range they provide in their layered jams and “conducive to saying ‘what?’ lyrics” is a spectacle to be seen and heard. I love those boys and travel often to see them. Thirdly, there is Z-Ro, a Houston rapper who came up in the game working closely with DJ Screw. His soulful slap-back way of describing pain is relatable. For days where I feel torrential emotional rain, I pop in my grey cassette, turn up the deck, and listen to his album, “Look at What You Did to Me”. FYI, that album is certainly explicit.
Any dream venues you have yet to play?
For sure! Dreaming big is part of who I am. I envision myself playing magical venues such as Red Rocks Ampitheatre in Colorado, the Hollywood Bowl in LA, The Fillmore and Terrapin Crossroads in San Fran, and big festivals like Arise Music Festival, Bonnaroo, and Lockn’. I also look forward to creating music-centered events that give back to our community and raise awareness on important matters, such as water preservation and indigenous people’s rights.
What is the best part of being a songwriter?
For me, the best part of songwriting is giving poetry a well-rounded life through music. I love transcribing energy into text that becomes sound and then song. There is something about the vocal cadence of certain words placed adjacent to one another that really clicks. It’s like some words are just excited to pieces upon meeting each other. To get what I mean, try saying aloud this phrase from my song “Whoooo Are You?”, which will be on my next album, “of Thank You”. The lyrics read, “Yonder I call from bones that fall, from the rotund conjunction, from the human walking tall”. Those words house so well together. The sounds get up and walk hand-in-hand.
Tell us about your latest video! Where was it filmed?
My latest music video is for the song, “World Peace a Thing”, from my debut album, “of Vinyl”, by Kendra & the Bunnies. It is a chant singing for better days. It reminds that there is a place for peace within each and everyone of us. I believe it begins in our hearts. It then expands to our minds, our thoughts, and our actions. This song brings attention to the day-to-day ridiculousness of common societal struggles. After all, our neighborhoods and families are ultimately structured just like those in other countries. For the video, I placed myself in nature. When it comes to my mission, I draw energetically from the Native American prophecy of the White Buffalo Calf Woman. It is said upon her returning, world peace will brought into this reality. So, I dance for the shaking up of stagnant energy, allowing space for this healing to manifest. I filmed it in the canyon hills behind Hollywood in the valley. I bring my guitar and hula hoops up there often.
What is the greatest part about living in Los Angeles?
There are several things I love about LA. First, the historical facet of ‘old Hollywood’. I have a nostalgic frame of mind on a lot of things. Driving around town, I feel there is so much conceptual history that has been produced here in films. Doubling on that nostalgia is the Sunset Strip where a lot of rock ’n rollers used in hang in the 1970s. I like to go there and soak up that culture. Southern California is beautiful too. In places like Malibu, you can be on top of a mountain that overlooks the ocean. It is powerful.
Any Vinyl plans for your new music?
Yeah! I was recently invited in for a live session at Leesta Vall Sound Recordings in Brooklyn, NY. It is a record label that specializes in cutting tracks directly to vinyl. Basically, I will go in and lay down some songs to be recorded straight onto a 7” lathe cut record. This process makes each track completely unique. It is a snapshot of my sound at the time made specifically with one listener in mind. To pre-order for my October live session, you can visit Leesta Vall’s website here.
Where can our readers follow, share and buy your latest releases?
My debut album, “of Vinyl”, as well as the two books I have written are available for purchase here.
Kendra & the Bunnies’ music is available for listening on all streaming platforms.
You can find links to each platform here.
If you want to get to know more about me & stay in touch with my upcoming albums, books, & other projects,
I recommend following me on Instagram. I am @Kenbunny. Also, My website has all relevant information, show dates, offerings, and more about me too.
To watch the “World Peace a Thing” music video and other performances of mine, you can visit my youtube channel here.
MySphera is the matchmaker between new music and tastemakers. If you make music, learn more about our services here.
Or, if you want to join our tastemakers roster go here.
source https://www.mysphera.co/single-post/MySphera-Artist-Spotlight-Kendra-The-Bunnies
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ramrodd · 6 years ago
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Listening to Elizabeth Warren reminds me of Adlai Stevenson. Are some people just too smart to be president?
Philosophically, that is to say, in terms of Democratic Socialism, Bernie Sanders and AOC are virtual clones, but all things Sanders are in the rearview mirror of AOC and her Green New Deal. Among other things, AOC is the future of the ERA.
COMMENTARY:
This is an excellent question. It’s exactly why I will never run for President.
My cousin Woody ran and won and his legacy is a very mixed bag. I went to Vietnam on the basis that I was the leading edge of the League of Nations, but I live in DC to try to stay as far away from white Southern Scots Presbyterians, who represent the absolute existential core of America whte supremacy, as possible. And, as a Christian, I prefer to avoid the economics of the Anti-Christ distilled in the Pro-Live Evangelical business model they generally embrace. It’s why so many of them send their children to DC with MAGA hats instead of tin foil.
Woody was smart as hell. My dad aspired to emulate him in the way Robert E. Lee attempted to emulate George Washington. I’m pretty smart, myself, but dad is really in a different league, number one, and, number two, he was probably an NT and I’m an SP and, in many was, he was from Mars and I was from Uranus. I have learned to consciously think like the way my did did like fielding a ground ball and my odd manner of acquiring knowledge has begun to pay off in my eight decade, but it’s been a long, strange trip.
Sometimes all you can do is to be willin’ to keep on truckin’.
Any of these people running could be a potent President of the United States. The Oval Office expands the capacities of the individual by literally channeling George Washington, spiritually, as an inheritance. It just does. Lincoln may be the only individual who came to office fully formed, but even he had to complete the 2 year learning curve compelled by the US Constitution.
It takes some people longer than others. JFK was as about on track, primarily because he was a very smart person in a Adlai Stevenson as PT Boat action figure kind of way. Once upon a time, Harvard produced scholars but, since the take-over of Columbia by the SDS in 1968, it’s become more of a vocational degree, like auto mechanics and HVAC engineers, than Oxford or Cambridge. There are still very smart people going through Harvard Yard, as a proxy for the American academe, but, when it comes to grand strategy, the post-modern dialectical deconstruction of the SDS forces a choice between the two wings of the Oliver Stone version of Vietnam, John Lewis Gaddis’s Kennon Long Telegram orientation on the one hand and Victor Davis Hanson’s relentless Churchhill oriented Fascist sophistry and you end up doing stupid things like the Obama Russian sanctions. Obama is a very smart man but he let himself be misled by the advice Hillary Clinton was being fed by Robert Kagan, the co-author of the Project for the New American Century that informed the invason of Iraq.
Obama likewise came to the Oval Office fully formed, but he was prevented from fully realizing his potential by a number of things, one being Mitch McConnell’s obstructionism, as a proxy for what has become the MAGA hat coalition of white Southern Scots Presbyterians who are pulling Duck Ass Don around by his dick in the way he learned to expect from Roy Cohn. Obama had absolutely no room to manuever after Rahm Emanuel squandered Speaker Pelosi’s gavel and the majority in the Senate, legislatively. Until AOC came along, the Democrats didn’t exhibit much spine and a great deal of appeasement if not out-right ideological collaboration with Newt Gingrich’s Contract with America. That was the biggest problem he faced and he got about as much out of it as possible,
But a more significant obstacle to his personal growth was Valerie Jarrett, who shaped and maintained the cacoon in which she ensconsed him. People who think like her in the Democrat conference are the biggest danger to the Green New Deal. As a business person, she is perfectly content with the Tory Socialism and class warfare of Reaganomics. The only difference between Valerie Jarrett and Condoleezza Rice, in terms of Russia, are their political patrons. Hillary Clinton and Laura D’Angelo Tyson fall into this catagory. As the leading edge of the ERA generation, they all played the hand they were dealt and represent the rising value added of the 19th Amendment and Title IX. They are the base line from which AOC has been launched, but they have become reactionary. And that’s what may have been the most profound inhibition on Obama in becoming POTUS. I’d vote for him and Hillary again because, unlike virtually any white Southern Scots Presbyterian male with an (R) behind his name, they can learn. And will learn. It just hasn’t started yet.
Elizabeth Warren falls into this generation on some issues, but, in terms of banking and securities, she represents important, if not necessary, financial structures of the Green New Deal. Finance is probably the greatest single fallacy of Marxism and the singular seat of the essential criminal intent of the Tory Socalism and class warfare of Reganomics and the macroeconomic populism of Donald Duck Ass. A HUGE difference between America in 1981, before Reagan, and the Soviet Union in 1981 was our banking system and securities milieu, both of which have been systematically corrupted by people in the GOP Deep State I associate with Donald T. Regan, Phil and Wendy Gramm, and Newt Gingrich. There are other Republican villians in the mix, but that’s a good place to start, especially when you toss in Roger Stone, Steve Bannon and Mick Mulvaney, the sort of creme de la creme of crypto-Fascist cesspool scum. If Elizabeth Warren could pass all the banking and securites legislation she desires by 2020, she would be able to hit the ground running to implement the Green New Deal without having to thing about it all that much,
In terms of learning curve, 43 didn’t really become his own president until he fired Rumsfeld and installed Bob Gates at DoD. In that respect, he had a 6 year learning curve. Until then, Cheney had basically dictatated national policy, especially in terms of Iraq’s oil. This fig leaf of spreading democracy is just that. At best, the invasion of iraq was a blunder of cosmic proportions but my personal opinion is that it was a war crime, pure and simple. The lesson Bush should have learned from Vietnam that his daddy did was to not invade Iraq.
Clinton’s Dayton Accords is the reason why the invasion of Iraq hasn’t been a bigger disaster for America and why I say Obama fucked up the US-Russian relations on the advice of Robert Kagan. Clinton should have been given a Nobel Prize for that project because it is exactly what the Marshall Plan was all about, especially as it pertains to George Kennan’s Long Telegram.
As I say, I went to Vietnam as the leading edge of the League of Nations, keeping a family heritage alive, and as part of the triangulation of the United Nations Blue Helmet Peace Keepers, the Peace Corps and the Greet Berets. We were in Vietnam to give those collateral agendas the space and time they needed to get traction, globally. Circumstances forced America to sacrifice the Republic of Vietnam towards that end, but the result, the collapse of the Soviet Union, has worked out well for us.
And the signing of the Dayton Accords in 1995 was the fruits of that grand strategy, in that the Treaty ending the Bosnian War was the first time an active conflict was put tamped down by the tactical peace keeping of the UN Blue Helments and then smothered by the combined UN Blue Helmets/NATO intervention made possible by the Dayton Accords AND the active acquiesence, if not enthusiastic participation, by Putin’s Russia. This project occurred in the TRADITIONAL Russian sphere of influence and it couldn’t have happened if they didn’t want it to, but it seems the Russians realized they didn’t have any solutions and they were willing to try something new. And when they handed over the keys to Prestinka Airport to the NATO column being led by Wesley Clark, it represented a brand new era in international cooperation. We couldn’t have conducted our operations against Terroism in that region without the strategic easement Russia continues to provide.
And this is what Obama fucked up. And he’s a very smart guy.
In regards to Donald Duck Ass, there doesn’t seem to be any constructive learning curve operating. He’s like the entire Roger Stone wing of the GOP, who are like bank robbers who get caught and go to prison but, instead of changing their ways, learn how to become better bank robbers. For example, these sanctions against South Korea, China, India, Turkey and Japan have nothing to do with any grand strategy beyond Duck Ass Don’s need to keep the Bull Market going and high prices for gas at the pump here, in the states. provides the liquidity that’s being sucked out by the 2017 Tax Reforms the markets need to keep the party going. Duck Ass Don is still running the lie, cheat and steal “Art of the Deal” pyramid scheme he has run his entire life. He has a certain genius in a Rainman kind of way but I think he understood, intuitively, at a very early age he isn’t smart at all beyond a certain animal cunning of the Brooklyn street thug with aspirations of being an uptown made man. And probably the real problem is that he has managed to surround himself with people who are even more stupid than he is, or willng to suppress their smarts for a paycheck and the future rewards that the GOP Deep State will provided once they are out of public service in the manner of John Kasich, David Stockman, Brett Kavanaug and Bob Barr before he blundered back onto the federal payroll.
By and large, Republicans have never produced an Adlai Stevenson: it’s a Democrat thing. Bernie Sanders is an example, the difference being that Sanders helped Democrats shake off the intellectual topor that had set in after the moral impotence of the McGovern campaign: McGovern was what Bernie Sanders would have been in 2016, but that’s changed. In terms of coalition building, Sanders ishe light years ahead of where he was in 2016 and in a different universe from where McGovern or Adlai Stevenson ever became.
Philosophically, that is to say, in terms of Democratic Socialism, Bernie Sanders and AOC are virtual clones, but all things Sanders are in the rearview mirror of AOC and her Green New Deal. The trade off is that, as President, Sanders and/or Warren are smart enough to implement the Green New Deal as it emerges while AOC, if she’s smart, will inherit the Speaker’s gavel and retire after a career of providing the constancy of purpose as the Green New Deal evolves as we advance past the dawning of the Age of the 19th Amendment.
And Adlai Stevenson could never have accomplished that. He wasted a great deal of energy spinning his wheels as an intellectual. Bernie was like that until 2016 BUT AOC came out of the chute with her big wheels posi-traction digging into with big chucks of dirt and the only thing really slowing her down is the ERA generation. She is the future of the ERA.
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nancypullen · 7 years ago
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Keep on Truckin’
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Remember that guy?  If you were a child of the 70′s you probably drew him on notebooks, I know I did.  Originally a symbol of optimism and encouragement, and supposedly drawn from the Blind Boy Fuller song “Truckin’ My Blues Away”, the phrase has kept me going more times than I care to count.  Just keep putting one foot in front of the other...
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That motto has seen me through my recent one-legged holiday madness, helped me survive waving both boys off to far away places, and today....well, today I walked to the mailbox and back without crutches.  I may have walked like Frankenstein, and I may have had my phone in my pocket in case I fell and couldn’t get up, but  all you can do is prepare yourself and keep on truckin’.      I did it! I did it! I did it!   Each day will get better and by the time that daffodils are blooming I should be salsa dancing.  That’s my plan anyway. I mentioned that the Pullen boys left.  Tyler and Jamie left first and had a smooth trip back to Annapolis.   Matt was due to leave on the 3rd of January but received an offer from Delta that he couldn’t resist.  They were anticipating massive problems from the winter storm, and Amsterdam (one of his connecting cities) was also experiencing weather issues - so they gave him the option to delay his travels.  Yippee! He was happy to stay a couple of extra days and we were thrilled to keep him.  He eventually departed on the 5th only to get stuck in Detroit due to a mechanical issue with the aircraft. Delta provided a hotel room, but of all the places one might enjoy a free 24 hours, Detroit is probably not at the top of anyone’s list.  He tried again the next day, got out of Detroit and though he ran into some minor delays, minor luggage issues,etc.  he did finally make it into Kampala, Uganda where he stayed overnight before making the 5 hour drive to Mbarara.    He said it felt like he’d been in transit for days (he had).  He just kept on truckin’.   All is well that ends well and he’s back in his house and all of his luggage made it intact - dry goods, movies, new underwear,all of the things that make life in Mbarara more enjoyable.   On the 14th of January we’ll be exactly one month from the due date of the royal baby.  No, not the Windsors, silly....Tyler and Jamie! Our precious Valentine will be arriving soon and  I. can’t. wait.   While they were home for the holidays Jamie’s mom, sister, and aunt hosted a baby shower and dinner.  It was wonderful.  They wanted everyone to be there to celebrate the arrival of this tiny person that’s cementing all of us as family.  Baby showers are usually a hen party, but this one was a true family gathering - men and women of all ages with one thing in common, love for She Who Shall Not Be Named.  Seriously, they won’t share the baby’s name!   They have said that it’s not something bonkers or bizarre, but they’re satisfied with their choice and really don’t want to hear months of opinions.  I nagged enough that I was able to get three tiny bits of information out of them...this name did not appear in the top 500 popular baby names of 2016 (based on the Social Security site),  the first letter appears in the second half of the alphabet, and it’s two syllables.  I got really excited thinking that it might be Lucy, but that name came in at #55 in 2016.  Darn.  Of course, knowing Tyler every single hint could be a lie to throw me off the scent.  I think I should assert granny rights and get the name.  I guess I can wait another few weeks, but if she goes a day past due date I think they have to tell me. Here are a few snaps from the baby shower.  Jamie’s folks have a building on their farm that is called “the barn” but it’s not a barn, it’s a fabulous party space with a full kitchen and bar and plenty of room. Man, I wish we had a party barn!   The theme was woodland animals, because that’s sort of how they’ve done the nursery.  Would you just look at this precious cake that Jamie’s mom created?
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Adorable!
Of course, Chuck was allowed to attend since he’s going to have to play second fiddle to the new arrival.
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This is a cute one of Tyler, Jamie, and Jamie’s sister, Katie.  And Chuckles the Wonder Dog.
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Everything was so cute! 
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Check out that sweet sign that Jamie’s mom made - I love you to the moon and back. *sigh*  So precious.
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It was all very casual and relaxed which meant that everyone had a great time.  The shower was followed by a big pre-Christmas family dinner.  I’d been asked to bring a dessert and heap of homemade macaroni and cheese, so I brought a raspberry-chocolate pavlova and enough pasta and gruyere to feed an army.  All of the food was delicious, no one went hungry.
Side note: the Daddy-to-be received a tool belt with everything he’ll need for changing diapers and/or soothing a fussy baby.  He’s locked and loaded.  I have all the faith in the world in Tyler as a dad.  He’s patient and has a loving heart, what more do you need?
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Yep, these two are going to do just fine.  They’re a great team. They’ll be able to handle whatever little Lucy throws at them.
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Know what else makes them special?  The fact that they understand how excited we all are about this tiny person.  Matt is absolutely over the moon abut being an uncle and even brought home a beautiful carved lion pull toy from Uganda.  He’s been sending clothes and toys since the moment he found out about the little nugget.  That’s probably why one of his Christmas gifts from Tyler and Jamie was this mug...
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funcle: like a dad, only cooler (See also: handsome, exceptional) Funcle Matt has a nice ring to it.  I have no doubt he’ll wear the title well.
This little girl is about to become the star in a crazy, loving circus.  She’ll have a wealth of people who will cheer her on, squeeze her tight, hold her hand, laugh with her, and when times are tough teach her to just keep on’ truckin’.  I’m so thrilled to start the journey.
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