#But if I want to do this I have to learn- which means LEAVING THE COMFORT ZONE 🫠

[8-evil-annoying-catboys]

fun fact: experienced witches who practice it know that any form of divination is more or less just self-reflection. no matter how much you believe in supernatural stuff or don’t, if you identify yourself as a witch and youre skilled at the practice of divination, you know not to ask foolish questions like “will i get this job” or “who will i marry,” regardless of your preferred form of divination. you ask questions like “what should i do to get this job” to ur tarot deck, or “should i pursue this person i like romantically” to your pendulum. the idea is that you already know the answer, even if you don’t know that you know.

so, with a pendulum (which isn’t my preferred method personally but plenty of witches love it), you know already if that person is bad for you, and your subconscious moves the pendulum to swing to tell you no, you shouldn’t pursue them, bc you already know you’re gonna get hurt. with tarot (which IS my preferred method), the cards all have many meanings but your immediate feeling when you look at them is more important than any pre-assigned meaning (bc it reflects what you already intuitively know).

that’s why a good fortune-teller reads for themselves, and if they do it as a job, skilled readers don’t take questions for concrete answers about the future and they seek to learn about the problem at hand before a reading. but tbh it’s always better to practice divination for yourself rather than paying someone else, bc divination is a tool to seek advice from the universe but also from yourself, bc the answers are already within you.

so basically, a skilled diviner who uses pendulums, actually uses the ideomotor effect to seek clarity on things they know subconsciously, but not on a conscious level. an unskilled witch using a pendulum, uses the ideomotor effect to get the answer they want to hear to the question, “will this work out?”

in short, yes, a pendulum is just the ideomotor effect in action, ‘specially if you don’t believe in all the hippie dippie crap that i believe in, but even i can admit that there is a lot of psychological components to it that some witches don’t acknowledge bc it doesn’t fit in with their belief system. however, believing in magic isn’t a requirement to be a skilled fortune-teller. you can use a pendulum with the full knowledge of the ideomotor effect and you can believe that nothing other than your subconscious is guiding your pendulum, and still get something out of it—as long as you know the right kinds of questions to ask yourself. of course you don’t know if you’ll marry the person you’re pining for right now, but you might know if you should actually avoid them like the plague because despite how attracted you are to them, you know that they’re actually kind of cruel with a veneer of charm covering that up.

tbh this is exactly what i love about divination, bc i’m very intuitive but don’t always trust myself when i’m not using my cards, or tea leaves, or a mirror to throw my own thoughts back at me. it allows you to interpret that which you already know as information from the universe or a deity or whatever you need to believe is saying this stuff to you, so that you’ll trust yourself. it’s a great way, for me at least, to train myself to listen to my intuition, and to learn the difference between my intuition and my anxiety (bc it’s hard to explain to people who don’t practice divination, but the voice of my intuition is distinct from the voice of my anxiety—they sound very similar bc they’re both a part of me, but after a lot of practice i can mostly tell which is which)

When I was a kid I had a book of like, "fun physics experiments for kids". And one of them was an "experiment" where you hold an object by a string and just by focusing on the direction you wanted it to swing, it would start to move in that direction even without your input. The book of course explained that this was the ideomotor effect, a phenomenon where your thoughts can create minute, unconscious movements in your body.

Then a couple years later I got a fortune-telling kit that included a pendulum. You hold the pendulum over a piece of paper that says "yes" and "no" and ask a question, and whichever way the pendulum moves is the answer.

At which point I was like "hey WAIT a minute", and in hindsight I think that experience explains most things about who I am as a person

[kenwio]

Joker's kid! reader and how they life in manor started

Author's note 1: This part is huge, and it was a huge struggle for me to write (and rewrite), so I apologize if it feels crumpled T^T and there will be other author's notes

Warnings: long read, grammar mistakes (English is not my first language), mental issues, abuse

Bruce knew that eventually you will leave the madbay, you were there long enough to heal, but he had no idea how to bring you to the manor and he can't predict your reaction, seeing your reaction of everything in medbay, your confusion and fear that you showed looking at the simplest things. But other things concerned him even more.

Firstly, he knew that taking you to manor would include revealing of his identity to you, and identities of rest of the family. Secondly, the family.... he was worried about how they would react on you being there. So far, non of the kids interacted with you, and only Dick visited you while you were in the medbay, but he never saw you awake, thanks for the side effects of medicine that made you incredibly sleepy. And thirdly, you were a child of a villain, who knows what you are capable of? So what if you seemed harmless in the madbay? Plus, Bruce knew Tim and Jay expected only bad for you and Damians opinion of you was as bad if not worse somehow. Bruce knows it's going to be tough and he is not sure he can deal with it

Today was the day he would let you see his face and lead you up to the mansion. So, why did the world greatest detective was feeling icky? Was he afraid of you? No, you are just a kid, yes Joker's kid, but still a kid. Was he afraid your potential reaction? Not really, but he was troubled that he could predict it.

Maybe you didn't really show emotions, which was concerning, but also was made him feel more at ease, since you didn't show any signs of acting like your father.

You were sitting at your bed in medaby staring at your blurred reflection in the mirror. You couldn't clearly see yourself, but you were sure you looked a bit different and the clothes you were wearing now, simple t-shirt and pants, were much more comy and much more suited for a child, unlike that horrible suit.

- Hey, little one, how are you feeling? - he asked with strained gentleness

- I'm okay - you answered simply

- Since you are mostly recovered you will have to leave the medbay - he started saying. You were expecting something like that to happend, because why would he let you stick around? He alredy done much for you. As you were staying in the medbay you remember that Batman had a rule - a rule of not killing. Maybe that's why he helped you and healed you up, he probably just didn't want to let you die. You knew your father wouldn't really care of something happened to you, and he wouldn't even avange you, because why would he? You are just a pawn and he has bigger cards to cards to care about.

- So you will bring me back? -you asked, simply, which shoked Batman. You just now simply and dully asked him if he will bring you back to the crime alley ? How? Why? He felt his heart stinging at your emotionless reaction.

- No, I want to give you your new home

- New home? - you asked, confused. What did he meant by that?

- Yes. You will live with me, Alfred, and my sons. - he said calmly, looking at you, studying your reaction, he moved his hands closer to his mask. - that means you will know who I'm, and who are my allies are, which brings me to the point, before we could go to your new home, you must learn few rules, you understand right? - you only nodded in response. You were really confused. Why he wants you to live with you? Why is he okay with it? What was his reasoning?

The rules included: do not reveal our dentities to anyone, no wepons, no sharp object, no violence, no disobedience, mandatory emotional check-ins, mandatory seek of help when you need it, respect of boundaries and few other. You listened carefully when he explained every rule, trying to remember every detail, but you couldn't really understand that all. And you didn't really understood what will happened if you break the rule, but you didn't wanted to take chances.

After he explained the rules and you nodded to confirm you got the idea, he finally took his mask, and his face seemed to be familiar, and after few sections of thinking you said

- Oh, you are a man from newspapers - you remember seeing his face on some of the newspapers you used as blankets back in the crime alley.

- So I guess you know me? And you know my name - he asked, a bit confused by your reaction and use of wording

- uh.. I saw you, I don't really who you are - and it was true, you may saw him on newspapers, but you didn't really read them, there was too much words you didn't understand

- My name is Bruce Wayne, you can just call me Bruce. And since I introduced myself, it's time for you to introduce yourself too - he gave you a slight, gentle smile, encouraging you to speak up

- my name is (your name)

- Follow me, (your name)

So now you were following Bat...uh Bruce into various corridors of ... giant house? Castle? You didn't really know, but it was. You looked around, trying to take in at least some of the surroundings, but it was too much for you to remember. All you could say, the place was really luxurious... really like a castle, like one you saw in story book you manage to found one day.

Finally you arrived at the corridors there you assumed lived residents of the place. If you understood correctly while listening to Bruce, here manor two of his sons lived permanent: Tim and Damian, and two others, Richard and Jason, occasionally payed a visit. As you looked around corridor, you suddenly heard unfamiliar voice

- Father, you really decided to let them live here? - that voice sounded annoyed and angry

- Damian, we've talked about it - answered Bruce. You looked to father and son, who started conversation, taking in the appearance of short boy with spiky hair, and bright green eyes. So this is Damian.... as you looked at him, you noticed that his angry gaze never leaving you. His cold anger mixed with with annoyance made you visibly flinched.

- and I still stand my words, they are dangerous - young boy said, walking past his father, stopping in front of you - I was raised by assassins, don't think I won't see through your games - he said closing walking in his room and closing his door. You looked at him go, you expected this kind of greeting.

- Damian can be a little hostile at first- Bruce tried to soften up the atmosphere Damian created

- oh, it's fine, I understand -you answered calmly.

- so, most of those rooms are free so, feel free to chose one.

You walked through the corridor, checking if the room was taken or not, and you stopped at the far away room in the end for the corridor. Knowing that you would probably annoy others with your existence in the manor, you decided to choose exactly this room. You understood that your life here depended on how Batman, or how he told to call him Bruce, and his sons, and if you wanted to live peacefully you needed to try hard and not make him angry.

Bruce wanted to encourage you to take a room closer to others, but decided not to, so he would not discourage you

As you and and him walked in, you couldnt stop looking around. You would be living here now, and it felt like a dream.

- if you need anything call Alfred, and if you need me, just say so to him. - said Bruce as he left you to settle down. You looked around, taking in a surroundings by a bit empty previous guest room that just became yours. You sat down on the bed, feeling it's softness. You were still a confused, you felt fear as always, but also there was something else in the mix of your feelings, something much more lighter.

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In the morning you was woken up by the rays of sun. You didn't figured out how to close the curtains. Previously you didn't feel like going to dinner, so Alfred brought you sandwiches in your room so you at least could have a bite.

You looked out if the window, seeing beautiful geen garden. The sight was new to you, who grew up in the surroundings of dirty bricks and broken concrete. You watched sky, which looked more clear than in crime alley, clouds, birds, trees. It felt surreal, and it made this light feeling in your chest become stronger.

Alfred knocked soon after, he reminded you to wash your face and brush your teeth (something old butler had to explain you how to do) and said that he would lead you to the dining room.

Damian was already there, he tensed up once he saw you. You sat far away from him, sinking in your chair under his gaze.

Soon after you heard yawning coming form the way you've just walked in.

-Morning, Dams, morning Alfred - you heard the sleepy voice say - B left already?

- yes, master Tim - said the old butler putting coffee on place on the table near Damian's one.

- Drake - Damian said through teeth

- oh, look someon in a bad mood since morning, how - the boy sat down, suddenly stopping when he noticed you. He looked at you, not a word leaving him as he quietly staredat you for a few seconds with unreadable expression. Not knowing you decided at least to try to make the situation more strange

- hello? - you mumbled. And he just nodded. His gaze lingered a bit longer on your hair, before he looked away, looking visible uncomfortable. Alfred served the food soon after. It was one of the most tasty things you've ever ate, even if you could feel tension in the air that could be cut with the knife.

After Alfred was lead you back to your room and Bruce made a quick check up on you few hours latter you were left alone. You didn't really had anything to do: the books that were in the room were a bit difficult for you, and you didn't really had an idea what to do with crayons, because all the paintings that came in your mind were ones that were present on your father's "show scene". As you were loking at the window, you heard a sudden knock on your room's door. You turned around, awaiting too see an old butler, but was greeted with the sight of tall young man with wavy black hair, blue eyes, and slightly akward but nonetheless friendly simile.

- Hey, little one - he greeted - what are you up to.

- Hello - you mumbled rather shyly, looking at the window, when back at him.

- Oh, good-old window watching huh - you nodded, soon after adding

- You are?

- Right, I'm Dick, and what's your name?

- (your name)

- Nice to meat you. So, how are you here so far - he tried to striked up the conversation, before you heard familiar annoyed voice of Damian

- Grayson, I require your presence, now!

- Dami, just a minute - he answered

- now! - Damian repeated

Richard gave you an apologetic look - sorry, gotta go, but I would like to hang around you next time, if you Don't mind.

-I do not mind - you mumbled as you watched him left. The way he talked to you was unusual for you. It reminded the way how Bruce or Alfred talked with you, but it was warmer. It made that light feeling in your chest stronger for a bit, until it was taken away. It was strange to be talked with like that, but it was nice. Suddenly, you couldn't help but wish but to be talked with like that more.

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As day went by, you started slowly getting used to the life in here and rutine. You mostly spend your time around Alfred, following him as if you were a little ducking. He helped you around, explained how to do one or other things, helped you to find books you could read through, also old butler introduced to tw, but you quickly found out that cartoons were a bit much to you, so insted you settled on nature documentaries.

So here you were in the living room watching about life of animals in tropical jungle, when you heard heavy footsteps behind door, after that you hears how doors were heavily pushed open, you turned around, and saw tall and built tall and muscular guy, with short black hair with few white strands on them and book in his hands. Judging by his looks and what Alfeed told you so far you guessed it was Jason. Though, he seemed somehow familiar to you, yet you couldn't understand why...

- hello - you mumbled, looking at him.

He instantly frowned, you could see the same expression of anger on his face, the one you noticed on Damian constantly.

- what, old man really had his sanity kicked out? - he grumbled.

You were unsure of how to react, what to do. On one hand you could clearly see that Jason was mad at you the same way Damin were, so the plan was ether to hide in your room, or to stay quiet. On the other hand, even if you really didn't understand how to interact with others, in a short time you've been in the manor Alfred told you some basics of social interactions and politeness, one of which was to iniciate conversions, which made you want to give it a go.

- I just found out that some animals pretend to be dead so they wouldn't become a prey - you mumbled quietly, you really just learned that fact so you decided to share it. But it.your words seemed to make Jason even more mad.

- tsk, I see you, little psycho, are not so different from your crazy Dad - he spat out angrily, leaving you feeling down. You weren't like your dad, were you?

- I uh - you struggled to say, but you couldn't form your thought. What to answer to that? You weren't sure.

- don't even try, I don't like clowns -he spat out. Before you could say anything or he could continue saying things that left you sad, Alfred walked in.

- Master Jason, master Bruce awaits you in a batcave

- thanks - he said as he walked out, leaning you alone with your confusion and sadness, or so it was until you heard Alfred's cautious voice

- Master (your name)? Are you feeling alright? You seem to be a in your thoughts.

- I'm okay - you answered immediately, not wanting to worry old butler

- I see. - he answered, a bit thoughtfully, before speaking again - would you like to have some tea with cookies? - you nodded eagerly, remembering their sweet taste -when follow me to the kitchen

While you were enjoying tea with cookies, and looking how Alfred was busy preparing lunch, cutting greens with cooking scissors and chopping vegetables. He done this all fast and gracefully, leaving you amazed by his skills. In the middle of him cutting yet another green leaf, Alfeed was asked to go down to the cave by Jason, who walked away immediately after. Old butler put scissors near the edge of counter, and asked you if you knew how to get back to your room, before leaving. You just finished eating last cookie, when you heard metallic ring of fallen scissors. You walked to pick them up, but seeing your blurred reflection in them gave you an idea difference of original idea. Now you were on the way in your room.

Honestly speaking, you understood why your father was hated in this house, and you could understand why they hated you too, Joker is your dad after all, but you didn't like him to. In fact, he only brought you suffering. And you knew there wasn't a way to undone it,

But there is one thing you could do.

You walked in your room, I'm your bathroom, and in mirror you saw that one thing that reminded you of your father's the most. Your damaged green hair. Although while you were staying here, your hair grew longer and you could see your original color of hair, but green was still there and you hated longer green parts of your hair, his parts of your hair. Damian, Jason and Tim probably hated them too.

Chop.

You started cutting the green parts, leaving only strands of YOUR hair. It took awhile, it was hard. But few minutes after you were without them, and with fluffy uneven mess of a haircut on your head.

Putting all your green hair in a trash, you hurried back to kitchen. To your surprise, Alfred wasn't there yet. You put scissors in the sink, and returned to your tea, happy thay now you didn't had reminder of your dad on your head.

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After your sudden haircut, scolding, and another, but more professional haircut latter, Alfred decided to keep an eye on you. He had to admit that your desire to show difference form your dad finally made him warm up to you. But he was even more surprised when you said that you wanted to help him with tasks around the house and managing requests of boys and Bruce. Bruce found it a welcome change, but not all boys agreed with him

Which leads you to the present moment, you were cautiously carrying tray with coffee and snacks for Tim, since he skipped lunch yet again making Alfred worried yet again, when you were walking past Damian.To avoid him, you took a little to the other side, almost kicking off some sort of sculpture, which he caught, stopping in front of you, glaring at you

- Tt... use your eyes when you are going anywhere, pay attention - he grunted.

- I'm sorry - you said calmly, - cool move by the way - you said in attempt to soften the move

- I wasn't asking for your opinion. - he said, glaring at you one more time and saying - One false move and you'll find yourself dismantled faster than these figurines could hit the ground. Touch anything else in Father's collection, and you'll be practice dummy for my katana.

You tried not to flinch at Damian words, but did so anyways. It took you few minutes to calm down and continue your way towards Tim's room. You prepared to knock, but door was slightly agape.

- Tim? - you called, imitating Alfreds tone of voice. You saw how his hand gestured you to come in, so you did. You placed tray with coffee and snacks on his table. He glanced at you only for a second, before his eyes returned to the screen of his laptop, in that moment some sort of text appeared there, making him jolt, put laptop down and run away. You just stood there, not knowing what to do, you looked between door from which he left, and screen of his computer device, when another text appeared on it, and this time you could read it - "low battery. connect the charger"

Thanks to Alfred, you already knew what charger is, you just have to find it! You looked around, seeing too many wires around the room. You looked at the laptop, and saw too many ports. As you were unsuccessfully trying to find the right wire and right port, laptop's screen went dark. In that moment Tim walked in.

- What did you do?! - he asked almost yelling. Immediately going to the laptop

Nothing! - you panicked, and stepped away. He raised a hand and wave it. Not noticing yor flinch.

- just go, go away! You are messing all up!

If you thought you were shaky after encounter with Damian, this one definitely did.

Judging by Tim's reaction, you broke his computer. You didn't mean to, and you didn't knew if anyone will believe you that you didn't mean to do so. Maybe you'll need to apologize later, but right now, all you wanted is to talk with Alfred or to use up Bruces offer and talk with him if you needed it. In the state of panick you must have took the wrong turn, and bot seeing clearly before yourself, you bumped into Jason, after what you was pushed back and fell down in the process.

- you, little psycho! Don't you dare to touch me! - he yelled, making you flinch. For a second you felt like you was back with your father, pushed around, beaten and yelled at. As you were processing what happened, you didn't hear soft footsteps,

Jay, it was an accident. They just didn't not you - said Richard, trying to calm Jason down -yes, little one? - he said turning to you, but you were already running back to your room.

You cruled up in your blanket, hiding from the world and trying to calm down. You felt like crying. You probably did cry. It was all your fault. You almost broke figurine from Bruces collection, you probably broke Tim's computer, and you made Jason angry, so , Dick too was probably angry at you. Why had you just break thing, make everything worse. Maybe you should talk to Bruce.

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You didn't even notice how you feel asleep for a short time, but when you woke up, you decided to see Bruce, if anyone, he should know how to get allong with boys. And that's what you really wanted, to get along with them, just to feel safe.

The problem however was to find Bruce. You remember Bruce showing you where his cabinet and room was, however, you don't remember where exactly they are. You managed to find Alfred, who gave you a concerned look, but explained you where he was. He also said that all of them were having a movie night - Richard decided that everyone needed at least one bounding day a month, where all of them would gather and do something together. That got you a bit worried, because what if you ruin their movie night just like how you ruined everything today. But maybe you could apologize in front of everyone for being inconvenience and making them angry? You'll have to brace yourself . While thinking about it, you walked through various corridors, until you reached movie room.

There they were: While movie were playing on a big screen they sat on cozy sofa and armchairs. Bruce sat in the armchair, occasionally looking on the boys. You could see smile on his face. Dick sat in the middle of the sofa, watching with enthusiasm and actively commenting on the plot, eating popcorn. On one side if him, putting his head on Dick's shoulder, sat Tim, who was lazily laying on sofa. He sometimes corrected Dick or commented on CGI, whatever it is. On the other side of the Dick sat Damian, who tried to make an impression that he didn't like being here, yet even you could see through his act, and who tried to keep Tim's and Jason's hands away from popcorn. And near Tim, in the corner of sofa sat Jason, who teased Damian and Tim most of the time, argued with Dick on which character is better and successfully stole Dick's popcorn.

You've never seen a sight, that was as warm as this. It felt so warm, so cozy, so homy

It felt like family.

And here you were: in the shadow, not daring to make a step, to come in to join them, to afraid to ruin this perfect moment

You've never had a family in that sense of word, and what you had as a family, you wouldn't dare to call as such. In your family was no warmth, no care. There weren't a moment like this. But you needed them.

After you were taken in my Bruce you found out what care was, but even so it felt like it still was too far away from you, so far that you couldn't reach it. Maybe you didn't deserve it, but you wanted care you wanted love. You wished you could be a part of family you see right now. You want to come in. But you know you can't, you know you will ruin the moment if you will walk in now. You know that Damian will add another threat to a previous one, Jason will yell, Tim will shoosh away, and probably Dick and Bruce will silently agree with them and will say to you to come another time.

Your father is Joker, that's instantly makes you undeserving of care and attention. Well, whay to say if your own mother left you. And as for the batfamily, it's only natural to hate a child of their main enemy.

But what if you can prove you are not like your father? What if love and care are earned, and that's exactly why you didn't get them. When you will have to try and earn it. But for now, all you could do now, is to hide behind the door in another room, listen intently on every sound they make, cry silently, afraid of making any noise so you couldn't ruin the moment and wish you could be with them. Wish you was loved at least once in your life. Wish you were a part of their family.

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Thank you for reading and feel free to share your opinion ���� have a good day

Author's note 2: I really badly wanna draw Joker's kid. I'd you are interested in my artworks , please let me know

Author's note 3: (1) In one of anonymous asks (here) one user had similar idea of what I had in mind. I hope I've done it good > - < (2) And I wanted to fit this idea from another ask (here) in the plot to, but I couldn't done it fully, I'm sorry T^T

Author's note 4 : to be honest, I have no idea what is tag list and how it works (I'm really sorry, but I'm not active social-media user), but few amazing people asked to tag them, and i hope I'm doing it right: @socially-embarrassing , @leovergurl , @deathbynarcisstick , @cryptic-arr0w , @lynns-cornerr

[starlighttsv]

Patience - Jana El Alfy

💌 Syn: Jana is learning to have patience with her girlfriend but that said patience gets tested a lot

»»— warnings: none?

»»— notes: requested by @elalfywhore i hope this is what you meant by ditzy!reader i genuinely didn’t know that word before your request 🥲 lmk if you want anything added or changed 🙏

»»— word count: 1k

»»— pair: jana el alfy x ditzy!reader

jana’s never really had patience, like at all - so dating her girlfriend of 5 months she had to learn patience

which let me tell you - that is not easy to do especially when said girlfriend tests that new patience everyday

“babe where’s my hoodie? i need to leave for the game.” jana says walking into the bedroom and looking at you sitting on the bed reading a book

you lift your head up from the book and look at her with a guilty look on your face “i took your laundry to the washer about 25 minutes ago, i thought you already had everything you needed. i’m sorry”

jana just pinches the bridge of her nose and walks to the shared closet, trying to find some type of jacket she can wear as it is the middle of winter

you just sat on the bed looking at the closet door where jana is, concerned about if maybe you overstepped.

jana then walks out wearing a hoodie a few sizes to small looking extremely uncomfortable

“alright i’m leaving, i’ll see you at the game?” jana says walking towards the bedroom door

“yeah i’ll be there, i’m sorry again” you say feeling bad that she now has to wear a to small of a hoodie “it’s fine. i’ll see you either before or after the game” jana says walking up to you and giving you a kiss on the lips “ok i love you”

“i love you too” she said while walking towards and out the door

you forgot about the game

after jana left, you kept reading your book as it wasn’t time to leave yet, jana just had to leave because she’s on the team.

by the time you were supposed to leave, your book had just reached a page turner. You just couldn’t put the book down without knowing what happened next - which is a bad thing because you had a alarm set to remind you to leave for the game … and you turned it off instead of snoozing it saying “I’ll leave after I finish this chapter” as a reminder to yourself.

said reminder did not work and didn’t even have a chance at being a reminder.

“BABE” you hear jana yell and shortly after hear the front door slam shut

“in the bedroom” you call out to her making her storm into the room “what the actual fuck?” she says angrily while throwing her duffel somewhere around the room

“i waited like 30 minutes after the game for you in our normal spot, just thinking you were trapped up in the crowd just for you to be here the whole time? what happened to you coming to the game?” jana says huffing while shredding out of her track suit and getting dressed into her pajamas as she already showered in the locker room.

“oh my god, i forgot i am so sorry! i was reading my book and it got to a good par-“

“you forgot about me and my game, that you promised you were going to over a book?” jana said trying to not show how mad and upset she is knowing how sensitive you are

you look down at your hands “ i’m sorry jana. i didn’t mean to forget, i set an alarm and i turned it off instead of snoozing it. i swear i didn’t mean to forget.” you say feeling really guilty

jana just takes a deep breath in and slowly exhales trying to remain calm and practice with her newly learned and still learning patience “it’s fine. you’re good.”

“jana-“ “baby you’re good. i promise. i’m not mad.” jana says getting in the bed “what about dinner? did you eat yet? i’ll go make us dinner. i’m really sorry about the game jana.” you ramble out really fast

“yeah i’ll eat, i haven’t eaten yet.” jana says while starting to open her phone. you nod and get up from the bed walking towards the kitchen

after making dinner you plated the food and went to the cup cabinet grabbing two cups and filling them with both of your guys favorite drinks.

as you were walking back towards the tray that the plates were on you tripped on your own feet, making the glasses drop and break - spilling the drinks everywhere

jana quickly runs in and sees what happened running over to you, while you were starting to pick up glass pieces from the floor

“go sit down i got it” jana says pulling on your arm trying to get you away from the glass “no jana i can do it, i broke them so i pick up the mess.”

jana takes a deep breath in “babe” she says in a warning tone “go sit down. i got it, you’re gonna get hurt”

“no jan-“ “i’m being dead serious. go sit down” jana demands with a angry tone making you sigh and walk towards the living room, watching jana as she picks up your mess

once she’s done she goes to the cabinet and grabs two more cups filling them with the same drinks - then puts them on the tray and grabs the actual tray and sets it on the center table in the living room right in front of you.

“there we go” jana says while plopping down on the couch and resting her head back for a minute “i’m really sorry about everything-“

“baby you are fine ok? i’m not mad” jana says wrapping her arm around your shoulder - making her bring your head to rest on her chest

“are you sure?” you ask tracing the design on her shirt with your finger “i’m positive baby. you know i’m still working on my patience, that’s all” jana says rubbing your back “you’ve gotten better” you say mumbling to her “oh yeah?” she asks making you lift your head from her chest and look at her with a smile on your face - nodding while saying “definitely”

she just shakes her head amusingly and pulls you into a kiss, deepening the kiss after a little bit

🏷️ @melpthatsme @rebecca-woso @authentic-girl03

[ruiniel]

Another Way - XII

Fandom: Castlevania series (2017-2021)

Summary: what if someone in the 21st century stumbled upon this stranger during a turbulent storm, narrowly avoiding running them over, and what’s more they can’t understand a word coming out of their mouth.

Pairing: Alucard x Reader

Rating: Mature / 18+ only

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Explicit Language, References to Depression, First Meetings, character-meets-world, Near Death Experiences, References to loss, Grief/Mourning, Fantasy, POV Second Person, Language Barrier, Violence, Portal Fantasy, Isekai, Slow burn, References to canon, Rewriting show canon, Because why not, POV Alucard, POV original character, More tags to be added

Also on AO3

Part I

AN: been a while

XII.

He doesn’t like coffee.

This becomes quite apparent with the different flavor of mild disgust over his features after each sip.

“It’s an acquired taste for some,” you try saying with a straight face, because it is more amusing than you’d thought to see a grown man with a perfect jaw and bedroom hair seated at your small table, coming up with the most telling, candid expressions. 

After breakfast—during which he insists on turning the cooker on and off, ‘to learn’, and during which, once again, he eats little to nothing—you head over to your desk and obtain for him the work Adrian asked for. It’s not difficult to find, and happens to be the first book printed in the English language, in the 1400s. 

“Is… this it?”

His enthusiasm says ‘yes’ when seeing the title page, and you let him take your place and scroll through as you head to get ready for the adventure of helping him look less conspicuous. “All right, enjoy your courtly romance, I’ll be back in a bit.”

“All right.”

You pause, turning to stare but his eyes are feverish on the screen, attention absorbed by the text. Whatever works. You decided to stop wondering. 

Having made yourself presentable enough to be outside, you tap back into the room on bare feet. “Ready to g—...” you trail off at the sound. His voice. His voice, with that same mild inflection, but the words are oddly shaped to the ear.

He’s reading aloud from the online scan you fetched him, nodding, writing in the agenda.

“What’s… this?” You near him, narrowing your eyes at the screen. 

Adrian turns to you with an excitement you’d not seen or felt in a long, long while. Somehow, it’s endearing. This side feels like him too, a natural expression in contrast with all those confused, dour moods he’d been mired in. 

“I need…” He pauses, hand in his hair, eyebrows pinched together. 

“What… do you need?...” 

He points at the scan of the text, long fingers gliding along the little black rows of archaic words. “... from now.”

“From now?... Oh! A modern version, you mean? From our time?”

Adrian nods. “Possible?”

“Y-yeah. There might be one… wait…” As you search it for him, Adrian waits patiently with his arms crossed, rubbing at his chin. “I get it. You want to learn modern vocabulary equivalents, don't you?” You bring up the 1400s version of the work again. “Wait… you understand this one?” Not that it's impossible, shouldn’t be. But you didn't exactly take him for someone pursuing comparative historical linguistics.

“Yes,” comes the answer, leaving you bemused.

“You know what? I won't even ask. Go ham. Here, I found it.” 

As he nears and glues himself to the screen, you dare to gently pull on his sleeve.

“Remember…clothes?”

Adrian blinks in realization, then stares back at the screen with a sort of longing. You get it. He’s making a breakthrough here, or so he thinks, one that’ll be of help in wading through terrain unfamiliar to him. 

But the rare practical side of you insists. “You can pick this up when we get back, right?”

He meets your eyes, nodding in acceptance. “Right.”

~~

The bell rings as you open the door to the second hand shop you sometimes frequent, looking behind you to see Adrian entering with care, gazing about with mild interest. 

“Well, here we are,” you say as he meets your stare, before looking towards the shop attendant who’s sitting behind a desk, phone in hand, chewing on some gum and watching the both of you with piqued interest—no, rather, watching him.

You cough, “Hi, we’re looking for some—” 

“Men’s wear is over there,” she answers, not taking her eyes off Adrian.

“All right, thanks.” Starting to think this is a typical reaction. You make a gesture, urging him to follow. 

He has a befuddled look on his face, but walks after you as you reach the rows of clothing boasting jeans, t-shirts and jackets. 

“So, listen.” You turn, waving a hand around the space. “You look for something you like.” You pull at your own blouse, pants, and coat. “And there’s a cabin over there, where you can try stuff out, if you like.”

He seems to understand, nodding and tentatively following your lead as you rummage through the merch on display. You notice the way he feels the garments, looking at you with a question in his eyes.

“Take your time,” you offer, going over and taking a seat on a chair. 

It doesn’t take long, really. Soon enough he’s gathered a few items under his arm, a bundle of… mostly black, cream and white garments. “Want to try these on?” you ask when he nears, standing before you, uncertain.

When Adrian doesn’t reply but tilts his head in slight confusion, you rise and walk towards the cabin, drawing the curtain and showing him the space. “In you go, let me know if…” You pause as he pulls the worn shirt over his head without much ado, spinning around and drawing the curtain behind him. “... call if you need help,” you mumble, stiffly walking away.

Your heart beats strangely, faster as you meet the stare of the shop clerk, who apparently has less important things to do than follow your exchange. 

Whatever. You go and idly sift through the items of clothing, humming to yourself. 

“Your boyfriend’s out,” comes the clerk’s voice after a while, and you blink in confusion, head swiveling to stare at her.

 “Oh, he’s not my—” Before you can finish that thought, movement has you turning in time to see Adrian emerging from the cabin. 

“Right, uh, you look… they fit, don’t they?" Heat rises to your face, damn the air conditioning. 

Black faded jeans, tight. A simple, white fitted t-shirt—was he always this…slim? Fit? A dark blue coat, reaching to his knees. “They look like they fit,” you follow, scratching your head. 

“Oh yeah, they sure do,” comes the young shop attendant’s voice, and a niggling sensation you’ve been unfamiliar with pinches at your mood. 

Adrian seems to agree, looking at himself, then at you. “Good?” he says in English.

You nod. “Yeah, good. That’s one round. Things here are affordable, so uh…” you retrieve your phone, type it in, and translate. “Find another item of each, to have spare clothing.”

He’s surprisingly efficient after that, and it’s not long before you’re returning to your apartment block, Adrian following with a bag in each hand. 

“Okay, that was relatively painless,” you comment, turning to look over your shoulder at him, and—

“Adrian?...”

His expression is frozen, light-amber eyes wide and lips parted. It’s not out of fear as much as it is… consternation?

You turn back around, a different tremor running through your limbs at the person approaching.

A tall woman, wearing a flowing white dress suit, her red coat slung over one forearm. Her long, straight dark hair is done up in a ponytail, swinging languidly with each step taken on black pumps. She’s always had a distinct sense of style. Her attitude is the usual—one of those people carrying themselves like the world lies in wait at their feet. You never did know how to feel about her, nor do you know much about her. You do know this is but one of many businesses she has under her care. Well to do, in any case.

Guess it had to happen sooner or later. “Mrs. Hawke, hello.”

The landlady smiles in greeting, blue eyes alighting first on you, then focusing beyond your shoulder. She lands a hand on her hip, “How have you been, my dear?” 

The question was directed at you, but you’re perceptive enough—you like to think—to notice the unspoken query following the first. 

“Doing well, um. You know how it is…”

“Mm.” Her eyes are still on Adrian, but her gaze is different from that of the store clerk earlier. It holds no fascination, merely a calculating sort of curiosity that disappears the moment she stares back at you.

“I actually wanted to contact you, but didn’t get to until now. You see, Adrian here will be staying for a while, and I know that affects the rent, so…”

Mrs. Hawke tilts her chin. “That’s right, normally so—do you have an idea as to how long your additional tenant will be staying?...”

“Um. Well, I…” You feel an urge to turn and look at Adrian, but somehow her stare arrests you enough that you can’t.

Just then, she waves a hand. “You know, nevermind. I know you’ve had a difficult time lately. Consider no fee added to the rent, for now.”

The impossible has happened. Mrs. Hawke, being… lenient? Forgoing business? Not asking the ‘how’ and the ‘who’ and the ‘why’?

“Er… you mean it? Really?” Your jaw might be somewhere on the floor for all you know.

She nods. “I do. If the time of stay extends indefinitely, then that’s another matter, of course… but for now, we should be fine.”

“Thank… you…?”

She laughs, a light, glittering sound. “Oh don’t look at me like that. After all…” her gaze flicks back behind you, only briefly. “Life does seem to hold all manner of… surprises, doesn’t it?”

There’s something unusual in her tone, but, ah, the prospect of not having to scrounge up more money regularly is a godsend. “You can say that again…”

“Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to run!” And she does just that, without another glance, leaving the two of you alone in the hallway.

“Well, I’ll be…” you murmur, then remember Adrian. “What is it about you, seriously? It's either the worst of luck or the strangest change... Adrian?”

His stare is unfocused, like something blew a fuse behind his eyes. When you touch his arm, he snaps out of it with a start. “Let’s go up?... You wanted to continue reading, didn’t you?”

Shaking his head like someone having been splashed with ice-cold water, Adrian looks down at you. “... reading. Yes. Let’s…let’s go.”

Picking up fast, you think as he walks ahead of you towards the elevator. And maybe it’s just you, but his steps are more determined than before.

Part I - Part II - Part III - Part IV - Part V - Part VI - Part VII - Part VIII - Part IX - Part X - Part XI

Taglist: @hornyf0ckers @the-keep-under-gresit @pencildrawer12 (this is old, let me know if you want to be removed!)

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MASTERLIST: CASTLEVANIA SERIES x READER

More of my work is on AO3 [many stories not on tumblr]

BLOG MASTERPOST (all you need to know)

Likes/comments/reblogs always and forever appreciated

AN:

Recuyell of the Historyes of Troye (1464) is a translation by William Caxton of a French courtly romance written by Raoul Lefèvre.

[aboutcustardcreams]

For love, we gladly pay the price

Summary: As Lady Death struggles with an impossible choice (flashback), you and Agatha find yourselves entangled in a very awkward/ uncomfortable situation. The question here is: what does the Road really want from you?

previous chapter

You made your decision– one each mother, in your place, would make. Your son is going to regain consciousness any moment now. And you made it possible. With your incredible power and stubbornness, you gave the boy another chance in life, a proper one. But at what cost?

“Please–” Rio never begged, yet there she was. You’d barely recognize her voice if you listened to it. “I could not persuade her to let him go, if anything– I encouraged her to save him from the start,” she confessed in a pained murmur. 

In the dimly lit hall stood the three sisters, their expressions stoic, yet contemplative giving the illusion that they could still be convinced into changing their mind. They had summoned Lady Death and that alone couldn’t mean anything good. 

Atropos, the eldest, stepped forward. “We can’t ignore what she has done,” her voice echoed like a thunder, taking up the entire space. Rio flinched, but didn’t back away. “Her defiance comes with a price. I’m sure your job has taught you that much, hasn’t it?” 

The Green witch’s jaw tightened, her teeth grinding at the words. Of course, she knew. She had known the moment the Fates discovered her secret; how she had hidden Nicky away, shielding him from the River of Souls he was meant to cross at birth. The punishment had been swift and merciless. She had endured it all in silence. Not a word of it ever passed her lips, neither to you nor to Agatha. Because nothing could have been done to change that anyway so why bother you and Agatha too?

Despite everything, her lips curled into a bitter, defiant smile. “she fulfilled the purpose she was born for. Necromancy is her gift. You can’t condemn her for who she is.”

Atropos’s eyebrows shot up as her head lightly lolled to the side. She let out a sound between a scoff and a chuckle at Rio’s tenancy. For being a Celestial being she surely looked quite small now. The other two shared a glance, their eyes lingered as to decide which of them would speak second, in support of their eldest. 

Lachesis, the middleborn, took a soft sigh as she approached. Her long golden skirt swept over the floor, leaving a trail of sparkle in its wake. “I understand your concerns for her– my sisters do, too. In spite of what you might think, we’re not heartless.”

Rio didn’t let her guard down, nor did she allow those ‘apparent’ hopeful words to get to her head, before learning more. “If that’s true, then spare her life.” 

The eldest let out a quiet chuckle. Three heads snapped towards her. “Oh, you’ve definitely gotten sentimental, Lady Death.” 

The witch’s heart started pounding in her chest at great speed, her throat clenched almost painfully as she tumbled out, “it’s my wife’s life we are talking about. I’m allowed to be worried about her.” 

Her mind spiraled, imagining the ruin your death would bring and not just to her, but to Agatha and Nicky. Eternity was a long, unrelenting road to walk with a heart that was very likely to shatter into pieces and bleed forever. Agatha, she knew, would never forgive her. And Nicky, her sweet, pure-hearted Nicky would grow up with that same resentment festering inside him. He’d nurture it, shape it into something raw, something dangerous, especially now that he shared the same magic as yours. 

“This is my domain,” she said, hands turning into fists. “It’s mine alone to determine when a life ends. You cannot interfere with that–” 

“I believe there’s a little bit of confusion here,” Atropos argued. Her eyes flicked to Clotho, who had swiftly moved to sit in front of the chassis, her delicate fingers spinning the shimmering thread within with practiced grace. The motion was almost hypnotic. Rio’s face fell, her frown deepened. Could that be your life Clotho was holding? 

“We do not mean to take your wife’s life before its time,” the youngest admitted. Her voice didn’t match the depths of her power, the way her fingers could create as much as destroy. 

“Contrary to your lover, my sisters and I know where we stand. We would never interfere with something that doesn’t concern us, so I must confess you, it’s not death we wish for the necromancer, but life–” 

Rio blinked in disbelief. “I don’t understand–”

“A tormented life,” Atropos corrected, with a grin. “Something you experienced in a way, but not quite.” 

“I’m sure you’re familiar with our distant cousins, Lady Death,” Lachesis added solemnly. 

Rio’s mouth parted in slight shock, a bitter sound slipped for her lips, “and you said you are not heartless?”

“I take that as a yes,” Atropos replied. Clotho kept her eyes focused on the thread, Rio couldn’t be sure, but she spotted a glimpse of hesitation in her posture. She was touching that thread ever so gently as if she was lulling a baby to sleep. Maybe she didn’t agree with her sisters’ decision, but being the youngest of the three, forced her to submit to their will and play along with it. 

“Clotho, please—” Rio’s shoulders sagged. “It’s not right. You must know that– you–”

“Do not try to manipulate our sister!” The eldest’s voice came out so loud and sharp, Rio flinched and had to cover her ears. 

The youngest swallowed lightly, as she averted her gaze, “I’m truly sorry, Lady Death. If it’s any consolation, the torment will not last forever,” she glanced at her sisters. 

Atropos nodded with a wave of her hand, “sure thing, sister. What were you thinking? Fifty years?” 

Rio’s heart picked up, “that’s insane!” She cried out. Her magic crackled dangerously around her. “She would never survive that and you know it!” 

“A fair compromise for her not to lose her mind and die would be between two and five years,” she admitted carefully. “As we already mentioned, we don’t want to kill her, right Atropos?” 

She grimaced, clearly displeased with the proposition. 

“I suggest two years,” Clotho tried. 

“You’re too soft, sister,” Atropos scolded her. 

“Please–” Rio’s knees dropped at this point. A part of her knew you could make it, however that was not enough reason for them to put you through that. Their cousins were no joke– she had known mortals who had wished to die in less than a month. And out of mercy, she had taken them to the other side. 

“I will accept the three years, and considering you were so adamant into being punished in her place, I want you, Lady Death, to curse her.” 

She looked terrified at the idea. Horrified even. “I-I can’t… I don’t want to…”  

“Oh but you will–” Atropos’ lips curved in a sinister grin. “Or shall we ensure she suffers far worse than what we’ve promised?”

Rio swallowed hard against the lump in her throat.

She had known it would come to this. She had tried to warn you— both you and Agatha, but deep down, Lady Death couldn’t entirely blame you for ignoring her. Bringing Nicky back wasn’t a crime in your eyes, nor it broke the natural balance of all things. It was an act of love. The love of a mother. 

But the Fates didn’t see it that way.

This wasn’t about your actions, not really. 

No, their wrath wasn’t fueled by what you had done but by who you were and who you challenged without a second thought. You had challenged their authority and proved yourself more powerful than they dared admit, and they hated you for it. Well, Atropos sure did. 

Clotho gave Lady Death an apologetic glance, “behave wisely.” She didn’t speak, yet Rio heard her in her mind. 

“So, do we have a deal?” Lachesis asked, picking at her fingernails. 

Lady Death’s chest tightened as she stood. Those words would have haunted her for the rest of her existence, of that she was sure. “We do.”

-

Present time

“Feels like we just came out of Mount Olympus!” Teen muttered in awe, staring down at his robe-like ensemble: a rich blue tunic adorned with intricate golden embroidery around the neckline hem and sleeves. Underneath the tunic, he wore white, loose-fitting pants, cinched at the waist with a sturdy leather belt that held a small pouch and decorative golden chains. 

“Check me out–” Agatha purred, as she admired her reflection in one of the tall mirrors placed against the ivory walls. 

She wore an elegant chiton, a deep shade of purple that hugged her figure with effortless grace. Its fabric draped like liquid silk, hugging her waist and hips before cascading softly around her thighs. The asymmetrical shape of the chiton left one shoulder bare, which caused your mouth to go dry as soon as your gaze drifted there.

“Oh, I am.” You drew closer, a subtle grin on your face, as your arms draped around her waist, and your head peeped out her bare shoulder. 

You’re hidden behind her body– almost purposefully. You didn’t want to distract her with what you were wearing, not just yet. “If you’re not a celestial being, then I don’t know who is,” you purred, your lips a few millimeters from her ear elicited goosebumps to her skin. 

She watched your face, through the mirror and her cheeks darkened a bit. You’d recognize that look anywhere. She wanted to see you, needed to, so she spun around and as soon as she did, her mouth parted in awe. 

Your dress, though beautiful, had barely crossed your mind until now. But the way she was looking at you made you suddenly aware of every part of it. 

“Woah, I’m– you are…” 

You did a little twirl for her.  

“Not bad, huh?” you teased, a soft chuckle slipping from your lips. 

The top of your outfit fitted as if it had been sewn just for you: it was a white bodice with a V neckline, adorned with a thick belt of black and silver filigree. The balloon skirt, layered with a silvery overlay evoked the jew/elry in your hair and swirled like shadows over the black underskirt that peeked through with each movement you made. 

When her hand found the side of your cheek, you leaned in, eager for more contact, more of her warmth and she obliged, thumb tracing sweet patterns over your skin. 

“How can you be so beautiful?” She breathed out like in a daze. 

You pursed your lips at her compliment, then tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “I could ask you the same thing-”

She pulled you even closer, taking a firm grip onto your waist. “You know, I think more and more that the Road appeared to test me, and only me.” 

A flicker of amusement flashed through your eyes. “We both know this trail is for me.” 

Her face dimmed at your words. The grip around your waist loosened a bit and you frowned. “Don’t do that,” you lifted her chin ever so gently, when she dropped her gaze onto the floor. “I’m fine. We’re both fine.” 

She tried to smile at your optimism, but her worries for you were eating her from the inside. “And let’s be real,” With your arms around her neck, you tried another tactic and pulled her in for a gentle kiss. “We make quite the hell of a team, don’t we?”

Her smile stretched into something far more genuine, making your heart swell with love at the sight. “The very best–” 

“Oh– There is wine after all,” Jen observed out loud, causing you all to turn towards her. There was a lovely cruet, sat invitingly on a low dining table. “And fresh fruits.” 

“Don’t touch it,” Lilia warned. “Could be poisoned.”

“Wasn’t going to–” she retorted, with an eye roll. “I’m not as desperate as someone else here…”

Your eyes narrowed at that jibe. 

Agatha shot an eyebrow at her and clicked her lips. “Careful there, Kale. Your obsession with me might be misunderstood as a crush.”

The witch made a ick sound, “Sorry to disappoint, but you’re hardly my type.”

“Course, I’m not,” she chuckled, with a wave of her hand. “That’s all the ladies say.” 

The others shared a quiet laugh, whereas Jen spun around and growled, trotting away from Agatha. 

You sighed and tiredly pinched at the bridge of your nose, before your eyes landed on Agatha’s again and you mouthed, “what was that?” 

She shrugged innocently, a playful grin tugged at her lips. 

“There’s something else here!” Alice called out after a minute. On an armchair lingered a piece of scroll, folded gracefully with a thin, red tape. 

You all circled the protection witch in a rush, eager to  figure out whatever was written on the paper she held. As she carefully unfolded it, the tension was palpable. Without realizing it, you leaned closer to Alice, your shoulder brushing against hers. You two shared a nervous glance before she started to read. 

She dared to grasp what none could hold. Each path and twist respond to our will. We wove the threads, but she cut the rope and stitched it back with cursed skill. The lies they spun must now unwind. The debt is due; your fate aligned. 

“What does it mean?” Teen asked, looking at each and everyone of you for clarity.  

“Well, I don’t know the details but you kind of challenged the Maiori, didn’t you?” Alice trailed, her voice soft, not accusing at all. 

It brought a tight smile on your face. At least she was trying to have some tact and tolerance. “I did, yeah. Or they challenged me. Depends how you look at it.”

Agatha’s brows met in a frown, as she surged forward to grab that piece of paper from Alice to take a second look at it. Was it a warning? A threat? What did it mean for you? Were you in danger?

Lilia and Jen shared a look, before the elder one spoke, “the cursed skill would be your power, commonly known as your silver,” she continued, giving a wave of her hand to help her reasoning. 

Your lips flattened. Correct, again. 

“It’s not cursed,” Agatha grumbled, flashing her a smarted glance. “It’s her. As simple as that. Her essence is necromancy and it’s about time witches– you all stopped harrowing her for it.”

“Lilia is just trying to help, Agatha–” Teen commented. 

“Exactly. I was merely paraphrasing,” the divination witch pointed out. 

“Of course,” Agatha mumbled, still looking irritated. 

You sighed, your fingers started to play with the tips of her hair. “It’s okay, really,” you added, calm as ever. “Plus it’s not that she wrote it. It’s just part of a puzzle…”

“I hate puzzles,” to Agatha’s remark, you couldn’t help but let out a quiet chuckle.  

“If I may interject–” Teen stepped in, snatching the scroll from Agatha’s hands, not without earning a glare from her. “I don’t think this is only your trial. I mean the message addresses a ‘she’ at first, that could be you, but then, it mentions a ‘they’ and a ‘you’ so it probably refers to more than one person,” he looks up at Agatha, eyebrows furrowing in thought. “Could it be you?”

She hesitated, “I’m not sure.”

“The lies they spun must now unwind–” Alice repeated the line, trying to make sense of it. 

You averted your gaze, eyes dropping on the floor for a moment. 

Jen’s head lolled to the side, suspicious. “Does it mean that… you lied to someone?”  

You gaped, then stuttered out, “N-no, what? It doesn’t make any sense,” a forced, nervous smile tugged at your lips. But it didn’t last. “It’s not clear… it’s–” you sighed, a tad exasperated. “We need more hints. This isn’t going anywhere.”

Agatha watched you closely, catching and worrying about your sudden discomfort. It was her turn to reach out to you. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Jen stepped in before you could formulate a response. “Maybe it wants you to tell the truth about what happened during the Salem days?”

“Yeah,” Lilia agreed, with a nod. “Since we were told the wrong version of your story,” she added, although both you and Agatha could grasp the hesitation as she stressed on the word ‘wrong’. 

“Sweet.” The succubi witch let out a short, dark chuckle as she shook her head. “And if we didn’t want to share our story? Then, what?” She dared to ask, in a mocking tone. 

Alice sighed and folded her arms over her chest. “There could be consequences.” The sudden seriousness in her tone made Agatha recoil. 

“What kind of consequences?” Your voice came out barely above a whisper. 

“I don’t know. Maybe your girlfriend should fill us in,” Jen shot back, rather boldly. All eyes turned to Jen, your collective frown deepening. “I mean, she’s been here before, hasn’t she? Or was that just another lie?”

“As I’ve already explained,” Agatha replied, her voice clipped with irritation, her eyes refusing to look at her for obvious reasons, “the road is never the same. It shifts and changes depending on the witches who walk it.”

“Oh, great. So basically, you’re useless,” Jen deadpanned, her tone dripping with exasperation.

“I don’t see how you’re making yourself useful here, Kale,” she hissed back. Hadn’t Agatha been powerless, she would have blasted that witch against the nearest wall, or mirror. Depending on how badly she wanted her hurt. 

“Guys, stop–” you stepped in, the faint beginnings of a headache pulsed at your temples. You pressed your fingertips to them, rubbing in slow circles as you fought to stay calm. “Can we not tear into each other right now? I thought I made it clear– we are supposed to be working together.”

“It’s a hard task with a witch killer giving you eyes,” she mumbled, though everyone could catch the bitterness behind her tone. 

“It’s a pity your vocabulary is as rusty as your magic,” Agatha quipped mockingly. 

Jen growled. 

“Not helping–” you gave her a pointed look. 

She lifted both her hands in surrender, “alright, fine. I’ll be good.” 

You blew a raspberry. She could fool them, but not you. 

“Umm, as you were when you killed your coven?” Jen inquired. 

Agatha stilled, her jaw tightened and this time she said nothing for herself.  The witch in pink had been dancing on thin ice for far too long, pushing and prodding without care. But this—this was the last straw. Resenting Agatha’s behavior in the present was one thing, but dragging up her past and passing judgment without knowing a damn thing about her reasons? It pissed you off. 

So you snapped. “Oh for fuck’s sake!” 

The room froze, Jen flinched, Agatha… well, she appeared pleased for a second, considering you successfully gave poor Jen a fright and were able to shut her mouthy mouth.

"You are, without a doubt, the most infuriating, insufferable witch I've ever had the misfortune of meeting. And yet, somehow, I’m not spending every single second we’re stuck here reminding you just how deeply you irritate me. Nor, might I add, am I blasting you through these walls like you so thoroughly deserve—” Your hands trembled, and before you could stop it, magic surged through your palms, a darkish hue of gray loomed over your outstretched fingertips, desperate to be lashed out, but you managed to contain it… sort of. 

Teen flashed Agatha a worried look, silently prompting her to do something. She groaned and muttered something like ‘spoilsport’ before walking up to you. That’s when she noticed your eyes turn silver. 

“Love, come on now, look at me–” her voice sounded so soft to your ears, your eyes darted towards her, but only for a mere second before turning back to Jen. 

With a sigh, Agatha stepped in front of you taking up all your front vision, and when she did, her hands opted to cup your cheeks instead of holding your hands. It was not because she believed you’d hurt her. Quite the opposite. Why? Because she was a succubus. It was in her nature to steal magic. And yours was very available and very tempting at the moment. 

“Hush, please-” she bored into those beautiful silver orbs of yours and you into her blue ones. You caught her lips curling upwards, then. “You’re sexy when you’re mad, I’ll give you that,” as she predicted, your anger dissipated, and turned into slight amusement at her evident joke. She always knew how to make you laugh, even in a situation like that. 

“Atta girl–” When magic vanished from your palms, she took a sigh of relief she didn’t know she was holding, and then pulled you in a hug. 

Once you pulled away, you looked at the others, at Teen in particular who had his lips pursed in a grimace. Had you gone too far? Had you scared him? “I’m sorry, I…” you stuttered, embarrassed. 

Teen gave you a shy smile as to tell you that no harm was done. Same did Alice and Lilia. 

Jen remained quiet. 

“You should apologize to both,” Teen told her. 

The potion witch gave him a quizzical look, “w-what?”

“I second that,” Alice quipped, with a nod of her head. 

“I hate to admit it, but you poked the bear,” Lilia continued. “Well, bears.” 

Both you and Agatha shared a look. You chuckled at Lilia’s choice of words, also pleased with the fact that finally someone was taking your side. At last. 

“Fine, ugh– whatever,” the potion witch rolled her eyes and waved her hands in mid air. “I’m sorry, alright? I went too far.”

Agatha hummed, torn. “Say that like you mean it, toots–” 

“Don’t push it-” that’s all she said, before walking away from her, and from you. 

“We will take that,” you conceded calmly. 

You knew you’d have a hard time gaining Jen’s trust, so for now you accepted her not-so-felt apology and moved on. 

Lilia’s eyes landed on something she was sure wasn’t there before, or if it was, had sat still till now, unmoving. It was an hourglass, whose wedged white sand had just started to trickle slowly. She nervously cleared her throat, then. “You know, I’d really hate it if demons, snakes or whatever ambushed us, so… whenever you’re ready…” 

“Shit… alright. Okay!”

You slumped back against one of the couches arranged in a circle around the table laden with wine and fresh fruit. “I will take a glass after all,” you muttered, with a quiet, humourless chuckle. “Maybe two.”

Agatha sat down next to you, at your right, Teen at your left, followed by Alice and Jen. Lilia took a seat across from you instead. 

Your lover gave the wine a skeptical look, as she tumbled out, “I hope this isn’t the cheap stuff,” the glass in her hand filled to the brim on its own. So did yours. 

“As long as it’s not poisonous…” you retorted, taking a long, large sip.

[911s-bravest-soldier]

i dont know if this is anything

But eddie seems to not like reading. He reads to Chris to keep up what Shannon had started, and he knows that its important, but there's like several moments where people on the team are reading books where eddie is like kinda being like ew about it? idk if im making this up LMAO

But Buck is constantly reading. Mostly self help books, yes, because my guy is nothing if not a mess in search of answers. But yeah hes read several books, and even in the coma he was a teacher, and idk i think theres probably something to do with the fixing and also something to do with escape.

But i feel like eddie was probably wayyy better at school than Buck. Buck had issues with sitting still, listening, authority etc. But eddie was probably more reserved, the catholic guilt kept him from acting out, also being from a smaller conservative town with his parents for parents...I mean its clear he feels like he has a place and he has to follow order. Thats why his fall back was the army. He followed orders there, where as a parent, no one tells you how to do it. You have to do the telling. You see him open up a lot more when Shannon leaves, and he really steps up for Chris, but Eddie still has this like mentality through a lot of things like he's waiting to be told what to do, or like he's waiting for someone to lay the path out and give him the answers. When he "falls short" of that "path", he punishes himself for it. He lets his parents take Chris to Texas, he stops letting himself be happy. He hasn't earned it.

But buck is all about action, going out and finding it and trying everything under the sun, and putting everything into getting better. And the idea of learning and growing is a little less scary to Buck. And he was never good at school, never really went to college, and so reading is less framed as an act he did to be good but rather something which he wanted to do. Where as Eddie probably read more growing up because he was told to, but there's no one telling him to now so he doesn't. He avoids it because its one thing they can't tell him to do anymore.

[david-talks-sw]

Back in 2021, @writerbuddha wrote this amazing post where he interweaved Lucas' words in his meta post defending the Jedi. I'd like to take a page out of their book and start a 4-part series of posts on Anakin. So, with illustrations by Brian Rood, I give you:

In George Lucas' words: The Fall and Return of Anakin Skywalker

- Episode I -

Episode I exists to show us that Anakin Sykwalker makes it into Jedi school, becomes free, and realizes his dream. But in the process, he has to go through a lot of painful sacrifices.

When we meet Anakin, he is a young slave boy who dreams of becoming a Jedi. Lucas makes it a point that, he’s a really wonderful, angelic little kid.

This is intentional. The reason George started the story where he did. He played with having Anakin start out in his late teens like Luke, or age him down to twelve-years-old. The problem was that a twelve-year-old leaving his mother - as Anakin does - is not nearly as traumatic as a nine-year-old leaving his mother. And there is a key story point that revolves around the fact that he was separated from his other at an early age, and how that has affected him.

The whole point of Anakin’s arc in the Prequels is that Anakin is a normal, good kid. And how does somebody who is normal and good turn bad? What are the qualities, what is it that we all have within us that will turn us bad?”

Well, Anakin has some flaws - and those flaws ultimately do him in. Those flaws are hard to see in Episode I, but they are there. He’s cursed by the same flaws, and issues that he has to overcome, that all humans are cursed with. There's a lot going on there. 

In Episode I, we see that there are a lot of parallels between Luke and Anakin. In Episode IV, Luke does struggle with his commitment to his uncle and his commitment to a larger destiny. His heart is to go and go off on this adventure, but he's caught in his obligations to the mundane, so to speak.

Eventually, Anakin takes a different road than his son takes, but it’s been set-up for you to almost expect that they will go— that Luke will follow in his father’s footsteps. Once again, these are issues that Anakin, Luke, and anyone can confront.

After all, once he liberates himself through a Podrace, Anakin is confronted with the fact that he will need to leave his mother, Shmi, behind. Shmi is caught in a struggle. She loves her son, but she wants a better life for him and has to let him go.

So she does. Right off the bat, the first movie shows Anakin’s mother display a type of selfless love - which Lucas refers to as “compassion” - that Anakin will only really be able to learn in the last movie.

Now, when they get to Coruscant, Anakin needs to be tested to allow him to be accepted as a Jedi, eventually. Because he has the powers… but as Yoda points out, there’s a lot of fear in him, and anger. That’s why they actually deny him the chance to become a Jedi. But it’s also - when they relent later on - it’s the thing that ultimately begins to describe some of his downfall.

In theory, the child should have been trained by Yoda until he was about seven or eight years old. And then when he was seven or eight, he'd be given a Jedi, he'd become the Padawan learner to a Jedi. 

But Qui-Gon wants Anakin to skip the early training and jump right to taking him on as his Padawan learner, which is controversial, and ultimately, the source of much of the problems that develop later on.

It is obvious that Qui-Gon is wrong and made a dangerous decision, but ultimately this decision may be correct. Anakin is indeed the chosen one.

That doesn't mean that the Council's prediction is wrong. The tale meanders and both the prediction and Qui-Gon are correct. Anakin will be taken over by dark forces which in turn destroy the balance of the Galaxy, but the individual who kills the Emperor is Darth Vader— also Anakin, who brings peace at last with his own sacrifice.

Once Qui-Gon dies, ironically enough, it’s Obi-Wan that has to train Anakin and take care of him and take over the responsibility that Qui-Gon has started. The Jedi Council let Anakin in and they make him Obi-Wan's Padawan.

Sources:

The Phantom Menace Commentary Tracks #1 and #2, 1999

Cut Magazine, 1999

Premiere, 1999

The Making of The Phantom Menace, 1999

Star Wars Insider #52, 2000

A New Hope, Commentary Track, Special Edition DVD, 2004

The Making of Revenge of The Sith, 2005

The Cinema of George Lucas, 2005

Starlog Magazine #337, 2005

BONUS: How George describes Obi-Wan's initial thoughts on Anakin

Throughout the film, Obi-Wan is at odds with Qui-Gon, who rebels against the Jedi rules. So when he meets him, Obi-Wan does not trust Anakin. He’s not a big fan, he has a suspicion, this initial skepticism toward Anakin which is why Lucas didn't want to overplay the scene where they first meet.

He’s like the reluctant elder brother saying, “You’re not leaving him with me. I don’t want to babysit anymore, I want to go out and do something good.”

Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan disagree about using what one would call in mythological terms "the guide." One believes in the guide. The other one doesn't. Obi-Wan’s argument is that taking on characters like Jar Jar or Anakin with them on the trip is “going to slow us down. This is not a wise thing to do.” 

It's a classic mythological motif but at the same time, it's conflict. The characters have to grow so what happens is that eventually the character that is very much against doing this has the obligation transferred to them. 

So by the end of the film, Obi-Wan has become Qui-Gon, by taking on his rebellious personality and responsibilities.

 Obi-Wan commits, and tells Anakin that he’s going to train him. He has character and takes responsibility. Han Solo would’ve left him out on a desert planet somewhere.

Sources:

The Phantom Menace Commentary Tracks #1 and #2, 1999

The Making of The Phantom Menace, 1999

The Making of Revenge of The Sith, 2005

The Star Wars Archives: 1999-2005, 2020

[cripplecharacters]

Hi, 

So, I have written expression disorder and dysgraphia, which means this might be a bit rambly or unclear but I’ll try my best to stay on as clear and as brief as I can. 

I’m currently writing a fanfiction for Wynonna Earp as a way to improve my writing skills without needing to stress about it. Background on the show: It’s a supernatural show based around a descendant of Wyatt Earp who was a legal officer in the wild west and got involved in a massive feud. It also has his friend Doc Holliday becoming immortal and being a love interest for the main character. The primary reason I’m doing this is because I dislike how they portrayed Doc Holliday in the series (often outright the opposite of the reality) and also because they just left out the fact he was disabled completely. Due to a gunshot wound when he was fairly young, probably along with weakness due to having tuberculosis for most of his adult life, which did eventually kill him, he used a cane part time. He also had a cleft lip and palate that was surgically corrected and he got surgery for it as an infant and had speech therapy, which doesn’t really seem to have impacted his adult life much in what I’m writing.

 I do have chronic pain due to an injury which was pretty bad when I was younger, so having a character who’s portrayed as dealing with that and continuing to be brave and selfless would have meant the whole world to me at that point in my life and still will. But as I was doing research I ran into a few things I knew very little about. 

My own disabilities are invisible, which means that I don’t have much experience with how people respond to seeing mobility aids. It would be interesting to show people’s responses, especially since he pretty famously took offense easily and didn’t leave things alone. There’s a fun scene there but I’m not sure what a common response to set it off would be. The biggest problem I have, that I haven’t been able to find a lot about: according to a medical article I read even when it’s cured people who had tuberculosis typically have some lung damage. I haven’t been able to find a lot on how that would impact someone day to day. He was cured of it magically but the idea of there still being damage makes sense based on the in universe rules and also someone being magically cured is generally considered not good. So how would it impact someone on a daily basis?

There’s some things in the research I did that make me think he was autistic (namely literal thinking to the point where he almost killed someone due to not understanding that a duel was meant to be a joke as a teen). Or maybe I’m just projecting because I am. Any ideas for how somebody who grew up in a time where nuerodivergence just wasn’t known would accommodate himself and be helped by friends? How would they understand it at that time?

How in general do friends respond to disabilities and try to help now?

There’s a few other things but they’re mainly just me being a beginner writer who doesn’t honestly. Thank you so much for reading through this even if you don’t end up responding!

[part 2] clarification: I meant the cleft palate wouldn't come up in what I'm writing because he's an adult and it didn't seem to have huge bearing on his adult life. I'm so sorry I left out part of that sentence in my ask bc I have a learning disability! didn't mean to! I'm so sorry and thank you again!

Hello!

People respond in many ways. In the modern west a lot of it involves random strangers being intrusive as shit ("what happened to you??") but in historical times I think it would be more of avoidance, especially if he has visible symptoms of tuberculosis. People still think that "visibly disabled person coughing = plague". If you're going for historical accuracy, it wouldn't really surprise me if strangers didn't want to sit next to him.

Long tuberculosis (affecting 25% of those who had TB) seems to be very similar to COPD, so the main day-to-day effect would probably be fatigue, being out of breath after physical exertion, etc. COPD is an incredibly common disability so you should be able to find a lot of info about it and how it can be managed.

Friends will also respond in many ways, and it also depends a lot on the disabled person. This guy sounds like the "hyper-independent physically disabled man" type and in my experience most of them don't talk about their needs much, especially not with the boys. In this case the accommodation is often just silently agreed on after spending some time together (e.g., after a few times going out they can see how annoyed he gets when they suddenly change plans so they learn to tell him as soon as they know, if he drops something they pick it up for him without saying anything since they know it's tiring for him to get up, etc.). If they know him well enough to know he takes offense easily they probably wouldn't bring up his inability to do something to not upset him and try to work around it instead.

I don't have enough historical knowledge to answer the second question, so I'll leave it to other mods. But I think it'd make sense if they just thought he was eccentric or weird rather than having a medical condition.

Hope this helps,

mod Sasza

Hello, thank you for your ask! In regards to the second question, it would depend on his symptoms, how well/if he could mask, and how other people view(ed) him.

I'm assuming he's level 1 / low support needs, as you don't mention him having a caretaker or difficulty doing tasks. Some of the examples include specific autistic traits that he may or may not have/used to have, they're mostly there to be examples. These are also assuming you're writing him as an adult only, if you want some info on how it would be like growing up during this time let us know!

Without good knowledge of autism, most people would think he's very strange if he cannot [fully] mask. Flat affect, lack of social understanding and other symptoms would make most allistic people uncomfortable, with responses ranging from thinking he's just weird [and would want to avoid him] to believing he's angry at them specifically [and would either want to avoid him or get aggressive themselves]. Most people will probably just see it as character quirks rather than symptoms of anything, or even think he's choosing to act the way he does. His friends would most likely be other neurodivergent people who either experience the same symptoms or don't have enough of a social understanding to realize he's not acting 'correctly' if he doesn't mask.

Unless his friends/family experience similar symptoms to him, they probably wouldn't understand why he does/reacts the way he does. This isn't to say they wouldn't try to accommodate him still, that moreso depends on the individual, but those who don't understand might try to push him to 'get over it' more than someone who gets it. Like Sasza said, over time his friends would be able to accommodate him by noticing what makes him upset/happy and how to help. 'Doc likes to keep his hands busy so I gave him my butterfly knife to spin' or ' the yelling in the hall was bothering him so I asked if he wanted to go to outside with me' could be ways of accommodating him without realizing, basically seeing his symptoms and trying to find an easy solution to help, wether or not they understand them. They could also give him unhelpful solutions while trying to accommodate, which would probably just further stress Doc if given in a stressful situation. Essentially unless he knows what helps and tells them it would be a guessing game for them [if he does that or his friend[s] respect it depends on them]. Try to think of his symptoms and what might be available at the time to help [like stim toys didn't exist back then but butterfly knives did, and ear defenders weren't a thing but he could walk away if needed].

As to how he'd accommodate himself, he wouldn't know words like 'stim' or 'overstimulated,' but if he doesn't care about/understand social norms he would be more likley to 'move in odd ways' or exit an upsetting area. A more socially conscious person might try to hide it, like using small tactile stims [i.e. rubbing a cloth or tapping his foot] or making excuses to leave an upsetting area. He might also be able to mask and try to just bear it, only unmasking around friends or in private.

Also the wiki said he was born in 1851 but died in 2020, and although autism would be named during his lifetime I'm not sure he would identify with it. The first medical documentation of autism was in 1877, and at the time it was called developmental [r-slur]. I doubt he'd want to identify with that, and even later on autism was only ever studied in children, and of course was not thought of well. It was thought to be caused by cold parenting or a form of psychosis/schizophrenia exclusive to children in the early to mid 1900's. For many, many years the only idea of autism he'd have would essentially be that. Because most studies at the time thought autism could be 'grown out of' [with exception to higher support needs people] he'd have lived most of his life at that point believing it was a child only disease. Even if he hadn't heard about autism until the late 1900's-early 2000's, it was still thought of as a stigmatized childhood disease by the public until recently [even by people today, hence the blog's existence]. If he's the type of character to be less set in his opinions at an old age then maybe later he could read on modern autism and identify with it, but I find older people tend to prefer dismissing disability for the sake of avoiding any change.

I hope this was at all helpful!

Mod Rot

[wangxianficrecs]

Follower Recs

~*~

Bruyères

by Cloud Flower (Anja_chan)

T, WIP, 11k, Wangxian & Hualian

Summary: “Child.” Hong'er looked up at the handsome stranger, if not a bit apprehensively. He nursed the flower for the god protectively, as if the stranger would snatch it. Not that he’d have any use for it. It was a weed, a wretched little thing, not befitting of the statue. Still, he wanted something to offer. “You want to protect him?” he says again, gesturing with his head towards the statue, his eyes never leaving Hong'er. His crimson red eyes. Hong'er nods resolutely. “Then you must be strong.”

~*~

🔒 Travel by Sword

by StarClearWaters (Readoutloud)

T, Series, WIP, 11k, Wangxian

Summary: When news comes back from Nightless City that Jiang Yanli is dead, killed during the massacre, they move her to the cells. She had appeared in Lotus Pier on the same day of the conference, The Jin are adamant she had been at the conference, and there had been several witnesses that saw her die- Their Sect Leader among them was said to have held his sister as she bled out.

~*~

Salvaging the Unsalvageable

by Maaeeya

T, 14k, Wangxian

Summary: A time travel fix-it. Mixes novel timeline with CQL Stygian Iron as it is a pretty convincing plot device. An older, calmer, wiser Wei Wuxian is dropped back into the past. He will use whatever means possible to save all those he cares for even if that means redeeming those who should not be given a chance and changing the entire timeline. Not much of a plot but a descriptive what-if. (Gist: Wei Wuxian reforms Wen Ruohan and civil servants his way to family, happiness, and life.)

~*~

together all along

by stellarmusings

G, 5k, Wangxian

Summary: Lan Zhan hesitates, looking between them. He feels utterly lost on the meaning of the conversation. "What… do you mean?" "The marriage," his uncle urges impatiently. "Do you have a date, yet? I suppose all of your distant cousins will want to attend, so you'd better have one soon." Oh. Oh, no. Lan Zhan takes a deep breath and puts his chopsticks down.  This is going to be a long explanation. (or: five times in which people wrongly assumed Lan Zhan and Wei Ying were married, and one time they were finally right)

~*~

That Time Everyone Assumed the Yiling Patriarch was Ugly

by tinitin

M, 4k, Wangxian

Summary: Nobody really cared about the Yiling Patriarch once they discovered that an angel clad in black would head to their waterfall once night hit. (Or, people should really learn some shame, poor Wei Wuxian doesn't know what's going on, oh, and Wangxian gets together early!) --- Spanish Translation

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for these hard-working authors if you like – or think others might like – these stories.)

[purple-haired-faerie]

Family pt 2

Azriel x reader

Future fic, Family fic, established relationship

Mentions of character death, child abuse and alcoholism.

Word count: 856

We were in our cabin in Illyria. Since everyone had started having children, we all decided we couldn’t keep using Rhysand’s mother’s cabin, so we all brought our own as a place to stay. Azriel was checking on training and checking on a few bits of information that had come back to him. I was there checking on the younglings health in my capacity as a health visitor healer. I had low level healing magic and wanted to put that to good use so Madja had trained me as a health visitor. Axel and Elias were undergoing basic Illyrian training as well as their own individual ambitions. Axel was working on controlling his shadowsinging abilities. He knew he wanted to use his shadows and he wanted to investigate, but didn’t want to take up his father’s position as the courts spymaster, which was fine with us. We wanted our children to pursue whatever they wanted to pursue.

Elias on the other hand had inherited a stronger amount of my healing powers, and wanted to become a trauma surgeon. His argument was that ‘the more Illyrians I can save, the less time Dad and Uncle Cass have to spend in Illyria training the soldiers and increase the armies numbers. They were both twenty five and coming into their own person. Esther was ten and was an absolute joy to be around. She somehow sure the best in everything and everyone and just wanted to help in anyway she was able. I was sat at our table working on my notes from the children I had seen today for a report I was doing for Rhys and Esther was working on some extra school work. She was always looking to learn new things and asking her teachers for extra work, when Azriel and the boys came in. Only they weren’t by themselves, but had two younglings with them.

“Love, we couldn’t leave them. They have no one out there and…” Azriel babbled and I had to raise my hand to silence him. The boy looked to be about seven, and he was clinging onto a baby I guessed to be about six months at most. “Azriel, it’s fine. We will manage. Can you tell me what happened?” I asked. I could see Esther, still sat at the table taking everything in with big wide eyes. Azriel swallowed, motioning our buys and the two children further into the cottage. “I’d finishing for the day, and I’d met up with Axel and Elias and we were leaving the camp, when I saw them. Well I saw him first. He reminded me so much of Cass. He was fighting with some other boys. For food I think but I’m not sure. I came over to break the fight up, and the other boys, well they ran off. He looked panicked like I was going to hurt him” and I gave him a reassuring smile. I’d been told what he and Cassian had been through as children and how their lives had been changed when Rhys’s mother had taken them in.

“I assured him he was okay and I wanted to make sure he was okay. It took a while but he said he was just trying to get food for his sister. When I asked why he was in charge of getting food and not his parents, he said it was because his mother was dead. She died giving birth to his sister. His father was angry at her for killing his wife and spent his time drinking and when he wasn’t drinking he beat him, because he was defending the baby. His wings even got injured meaning that he can’t really fly properly. One night he grabbed his sister and ran away. They’d been managing by themselves ever since” and I got him to take me to his sister and we came straight here.” I gave a nod, and returned to the two small children. “Can you tell me your names? If you are going to be staying with us I need to know what we are to call you?”

The boy looked around at all of us, trying to work out what I had just said and what it meant. I knew we were keeping these children, that they were going to become part of our family. “Momma called me Finn, and I called her Sylvia” he finally whispered. The fact he had to name his own sister broke my heart. I felt Azriel’s pain through the bond, the pain he felt for these two children was the same as mine. “Finn, how would you and Sylvia like to join our family? If you lived with us? That way you wouldn’t have to fight people for the basics and you and your sister could be safe and be with people who love you” Azriel asked gently. Finn looked around, at every single one of us. At me, Azriel, Axel, Elias and finally Esther, before looking back at Azriel and nodding, and that was all that was needed. Our family of five had just grown to a family of seven.

Tags; @romantasyreader28 @suppppp97 @thelov3lybookworm @azrielssgirl

[the-morningstar-family]

So what's the business

Alastor enters the office, which door reads I.M.P. Upon opening the door, a very startled, and slightly worried prince looks his way. As well as the tall imp beside him. He finds it nice to know that even Hellborns are aware of his presence.

Blitzø: “Oh hey, I know you! You came here once! You're that creepy radio fuck!”

Stolas: “Blitzø!”

Blitzø: “What?”

Alastor: “I am indeed the radio demon”

He puts emphasis on his actual title, but with what little he knows about the man, he is sure he will have forgotten again by nightfall. If he even got it at all, because Blitzø is eyeing him up an down.

Blitzø: “So is there another deal thingy - shit going on?”

Stolas puts on a very much learned and faked grin. He seems to adjust adequate to the lower class, if only through the guidance of I.M.P.

Stolas: “I am very sorry, is there a service we can provide you, sir?”

Alastor: “In a sense, though likely not your usual. I have a visitor”

Blitzø: “Wait a second - we don't just -?”

Ignoring the imp, Alastor opens the door to let Lucifer in. Stolas gasps, shoots up from the stool and bows.

Stolas: “Greetings your majesty. How can we be of Service?”

And while the prince goes through the royal stick, Blitzø, instead, steps in front of him.

Blitzø: “Hey! He's already punished, you can't fucking come back now-”

Stolas: “Blitzø please -”

Blitzø: I'm done with this shit-!”

Lucifer: “Woah! Hey I'm not - what should I even punish you for?”

The pair shares a look. The imp opens his mouth, only for Stolas to slap a hand over his, to avoid unnecessary threats.

Alastor: “As you see Lucifer hasn't exactly been informed of what transpired. But what was said in court wasn't entirely the truth, was it?”

Both stiffen, if they had them, one could've seen their souls leave their bodies. Their roles flip, and now the bird stands in front of his boyfriend.

Stolas, nervous: “I - I don't know what you mean”

Alastor: “I mean, that I am well versed in ulterior motives. If we promise you protection from further punishment in this regard, would you be willing to share your story?”

Blitzø: “Wait- what do you get out of-”

Quickly, Stolas drags him to him, bending down a bit to have a slightly more private conversation.

Stolas, half whispering: “Dear, we cannot just deny the king”

Blitzø: “Why not? I deny you all the time and you're a prince.”

Stolas: “That is not the same -”

Blitzø: “I don't care -”

Lucifer: ”I just want to understand something. Please?”

Blitzø crosses his arms, but reluctantly nods.

Blitzø: “Look, I needed that fancy book, we fucked for it, then we got closer, then his ex and her brother tried to fuck with us and Stolas took the fall!”

The king blinks, not quite getting it, and getting even less what Alastor is getting at. Though a peeved bird interjects yet again.

Stolas: “There is a touch of nuisance he left out-”

Alastor: “There are a few details most important to us. To begin with, why did you and your now wife marry?”

For a moment the bird looks startled, as if it was obvious, but quickly pulls himself together.

Stolas: “To produce a contonary heir, of course.”

Alastor: “Mh. So it stands to reason that there was not much actual love lost between you and your ex wife?”

Stolas: “Not- not exactly, no”

The prince turns red, trying to avoid the kings wide eyes, as if it was a failure in some way.

Alastor: “Now, I am not mistaken that you two are an item?”

Blitzø: “Fuck yeah, that bird puss is mine”

He would've found it quite adorable to have a possessive Blitzø for once, if it was not for current company. As is, the bird would like the floor to swallow him.

Alastor: “And this started as an affair, did it not?”

Stolas, embarrassed: “Yes…”

Alastor: “But you and your ex wife had never loved one another, no? So what was her actual gripe with this relationship?”

Stolas: “...That I was bedding an imp”

He shoots his partner an apologetic look, he shrugs. It is a normalisation that Alastor himself is familiar with. The deer turns to Lucifer, who looks uncomfortable to the floor. But oh, the demon is not done yet.

Alastor: “But I must say, it is quite an impressive business for an imp to create”

The I.M.P. bus puffs his chest proudly at that.

Blitzø: “Of course it is! We got our own fucking office.”

While Lucifer has seen much worse establishments in hell, this still wasn't exactly a five star building. One of the windows was even covered with a piece of cardboard, and by the looks of the it, the cardboard is not exactly new. The imp sees Lucifer's prolonged look around, and gets a tad annoyed.

Blitzø: “I know it's not a fuckin’ palace. But I'm also not trying to become a ass kissing butler, so an office is fine”

Lucifer: “No- no it's really cool. So you work here like, every day?”

Stolas, nodding: “Even on holidays”

Both Alastor and Blitzø snort at the privilege.

Blitzø: “Hey, it's ensured!”

Alastor: “It is likely surprising how hard it can be to make end's meet, is it not?”

He turns to the prince behind the secretary's desk. He gets a slightly sheepish expression.

Stolas: “There's a lot of things that need to be taken care of that I was not aware of…”

Blitzø: “Yeah he didn't even knew how to queue!”

Lucifer: “Queue?”

Alastor sighs. He loves him, but he is an idiot. He turns to the pair they have bugged long enough.

Alastor: “Now, I remember last time there being a young hellhound lady, no? You did have a dispute over adoption, may I inquire where it took place?”

The imp eyes him suspiciously.

Blitzø: “Why?”

Alastor: “To show the king some of hell's own institutions. One has to stay in touch, no?”

Blitzø: “Uh, the one at the edge of pantagram city. The shitty one”

Alastor: “Thank you kindly for your time-! Ta ta!”

The radio demon pushes the dazed angel outside.

Blitzø: “What the fuck was that?”

The pound looks as miserable as ever, and so does everyone in it.

There are several things that disturb Lucifer. First of all the condition of this thing in the first place. Sure it's apparently the ‘shittg one’ but even the bad ones shouldn't look like this. And it matches Alastor's description of the hospitals he was allowed to attend to scarily well. Patched together… that's a god word for it. Second, how casual the violence is. All these … kids… are fighting for something. For some privacy, for their meager belongings - they are biting, hitting, scratching, and no one gives a fuck. There is no intervention of any form. And third, there's the adoption process. Anyone can just waltz in and adopt a kid. They don't check where that kid will be going, they just say ‘there you go, sign here’. As if someone's getting a pet.

Lucifer, small voice: “I– I -I”

His eyes are teary and breathing is getting harder. The demon gently takes his shoulders to guide him out.

Alastor: “Now, now dear. Don't cry.”

Lucifer, sniffling: “Why not? I– I clearly fucked up- I mean I could've prevented all of this”

And Alastor doesn't object. So the king let's himself fall onto the nearby bench.

Lucifer: “Are you mad at me?”

Alastor: “I… I think I am rather disappointed. I had assumed there is a deeper reason than ignorance for your lack of action”

Tears roll down the red tinted cheeks, that Alastor gently wipes away.

Alastor: “I did not show you this to guilt trip you, dear. But this is important to know, and perhaps to change. There will be Hellborns that think that our children are lesser, or wrong or dirty. It is our duty to make them know that they are not, that they are important. That it matters who they are and not what they are.”

Lucifer, sniffling: “I really need to have a fucking word with Satan��

Alastor: “Yes my dear, but do me a favour”

Lucifer: “Yeah, sure, of course!”

Alastor: “Educate yourself first. You cannot fight this if you do not understand it. That includes the other rings. This is not a one day venture.”

Lucifer: “... Yes. It's, it's kinda my job. A job I have neglected far to long”

[acanth3]

The Sound Of The Stars English Translation

EPISODE 9/16

A Few Hours Later In ES Building, COSPRO Office

Mika: —Nnnh~! I don’t know what yer’ talkin’ about! 

Hiyori: It’s okay if you don’t understand it! It’s multiple choice question so just guess!

The worst last thing you would want in a test is to leave blanks, do whatever you want to answer. 

Mika: Well then, the answer is A…

Hiyori: Too bad! It’s C!

Mika: Uuuu….you just helped me with it but you already knew the answer

Ibara: ….I see. This seems to be a tough road. Even though it’s a basic college entrance exam question.  

Jun: No, I didn’t understand it either. So it’s a normal question~?

Above all, it’s rare for Ohii-san and Ibara to teach English. 

Hiyori: Fufu, language is important for aristocrats. If you can’t speak english you can’t talk within high society. 

Well, it was mostly my brothers job to talk with others so I didn’t practice much

Jun: Ohii-san’s world is large…..

Still, do you really have to solve such a difficult question to get into university these days?

Ibara: It’s not that difficult. Like I told you, it’s an average question. 

Even if you don’t study, you show other skills as an idol. Reimei doesn’t teach English. 

Is it the same in Yumenosaki? Listening to it is hard, however writing…

HiMERU: —I don’t expect them to have learned it either. 

I graded his written answers and scored 20%

Ibara: Is that so? It seems we need to focus more on English.

HiMERU: His vocabulary on words is low, so we should focus on making him memorize first.

Mika: Uuu, what a bad score…

Even though I've already graduated, I studied English a lot more then. How am I gonna learn now? 

Ibara: Of course if you want to be an astronaut you must take the English exam. 

Imagine how many people who are supporting Mr.Itsuki’s space trip are from abroad. 

If there was to be a problem with the ship, you must follow their instructions Mr.Kagehira. 

In that time, Mr.Kagehira do you have it in you to do so?

Mika: Uuu, I’d panic cuz I don’t know english….

Ibara: That’s how it is. Do you understand the importance of learning English now?

Mika: I’m not confident in speakin’ it. I haven’t scored good on a English test before…

Is it really bad if I fail the exam…

Ibara: Don’t turn around like that. In order to prevent such a thing happening we are here to fully support you. 

Also, Mr.Itsuki is working behind the scenes so you can head into space. I’m assisting in music production. 

Mr.Itsuki seems to be struggling with the production.

Jun: Nagi-senpai said he would be helping, is it still not enough?

Ibara: Yeah, if you watch this, you can see why they’ve been delayed for a while.

Nagisa: …..”What’s the universe described by Shu-kun?”

Shu: “Hmph. How do I describe the universe?”

“Humans, dwarf beings confined in a small planet, however the universe continues to expand”

“From the moment I define the word universe, it all makes sense. It’s an unknown mass.

Nagisa: …..”Maybe you’re right”

…..”What we know about the universe is only till the range we have discovered.”

….”Which is why people have tried to unravel the meaning of the universe with few clues”

…..”This town is one of them. It’s on top of a meteorite” 

…..”Some of the buildings in this town use materials produced from the meteorite.”

Shu: “Was it a ‘suevite’? Due to the discovery of that rock it was realized this location was built on a meteorite.”

Nagisa: …..”The universe is not something which can be understood by gazing at the sky, there any many messages from the universe engraved into the Earth.”

Shu: “Oo, I was just reminded of the museum you strongly recommended me”

“Changes in the surface caused by meteorites. Continues to pursue the mystery of the universe and geology.”

“I was only focused on the universe, but thanks to you, I was able to realize the most recognizable universe to us…Earth”

“Us humans in the first place haven't satisfactorily understood the Earth yet.”

“How did the planet come to exist, what kind of history has it had, what’s going to happen?”

“Even if you do come to understand this planet, it’s just another star in the universe.”

“Ugh, I don’t understand it. The more I continue to try to understand it and learn, the more I can’t grasp it!”

“It’s so frustrating that I just want to scratch my chest all over. I have something I want to learn but I can’t learn all about it……”

“Ah, it really is the theme for an artist!”

Mika: Nnn~...That’s great Oshi-san, you seem to enjoyin’ this alot ♪ 

Hiyori: Haha, I have no idea what Shu-kun is talking about. But hey, I wonder if he brainwashed by an alien? 

Jun: I said that too and Nagi-senpai agreed and says he says something which dont make sense~?

HiMERU: Why is the story of the universe needed in the first place? The context here is unclear.

Ibara: …..I asked for a report on Mr.Itsuki’s work so far and I had this video sent to me. 

Recently it seems Your Excellency and Mr.Itsuki are in Europe and have a steady report going. 

Mika: Wow, I kept in touch with Oshi-san from some time to time but I didn’t know he was this into it. 

….Okay, Oshi-san is doin’ his best like me.

Ibara: Yes, that’s right. Mr.itsuki is also working hard to produce a song appropriate for Mr.Kagehira’s space travel. 

Mr.Kagehira must repay Mr.Itsuki’s hard work, right?

Mika: …..Yep, Vice President-san is right

Oshi-san didn’t complain once when he couldnt produce music when I’ve been whinin’ here all day. 

Sorry for bein’ pathetic Oshi-san

I’m gonna do my best to study English so I’m not embarrassed to sing for Oshi-san!

those 2 rlly went to germany man

[yuwuta]

PETITION!!!!!! FOR THE ATLA X JJK STUFF!!!! OMG NOW I HAVE A BRAINROT love this idea sm.....

i have SOOOO many ideas you have no idea how near and dead atla is to me… i could rant about this day and night…. reader’s bending or non-bending abilities always change in the au for me, but i feel very strongly about everyone’s bending abilities teehee…. except satoru… i can pickle many aus for satoru bc that’s pookie <3

firebender reader that captures airbender yuuta to take him back to the fire nation as a reward and honestly he should fight back, he could fight back, and he probably shouldn’t blush when you’re rough with him, but you’re really pretty and stubborn and sure the ropes you put around his hands and ankles are really tight but it could have been worse. and you haven’t burned or scarred him, and you even give him some of fish you capture and cook along the way, so maybe you don’t really hate him that much. it’s so much of yuuta nervously rambling as you two travel and you not responding, but that doesn’t stop yuuta, nor does it deter him from thinking that you’re not all bad. clearly you’re strong and determined and you believe capturing him with worth something so he kinda…. let’s it be (also he thinks he’d lose a fight to you) and somewhere along the way he gets the courage to point blank as you why you’re taking him and i’d love to say he talk no jutsus you into not turning him in but also love the idea of someone else attacking you and yuuta turning on the airbending to choke them out which is insane bc you’ve done nothing but capture him but who’s to say that’s not a form of love too xoxo

or we can consider you and megumi growing up in the south pole together, it’s a small town so it’s not a coincidence that you two become friends, even if megumi is a little gruff at first. you two do everything together, even though your water bending abilities start to differ as you get older—you become much more mischievous, while megumi becomes focused on precision and healing. it’s why, despite the tradition being father and son to go out hunting, toji takes you out to sea to go ice fishing and you always run back home to megumi with your capture in hand, damn near tackling him every time and happily proclaiming you caught his favorite; and every time he tells you to calm down and not cause a scene, but you don’t, and toji and his mom chuckle as you tackle him and megumi tries to blush and wrangles you into a seat inside while he helps his mom with dinner. and really, all is well until some snobby prince from another town claims that your family is indebted to his and that you’re betrothed as collateral and everyone finds out very quickly that even though megumi spent all his time focusing on healing, that he’s still toji’s son and can make one hell of a tsunami if it calls for it. (and when the storm, literally, passes, megumi huffs as he digs through his belonging and stuffs a necklace in your hand and all you can do is blink and wonder what’s going on while his mom snickers in the background and winks at you “i think that’s a proposal, dear.”)

orrrrrr even though i firmly believe in airbender satoru superiority, i do make an exception for stealing yue’s plot line and making satoru a waterbender and prince who’s hair is only white because he blessed and saved by the moon spirit when he was very young. ofc, that’s not enough to make him nearly as humble as he should be, and satoru spends all his days ignoring his princely duties and bothering you and a nanami instead, ditching his masters and servants in favor of pouting at you to teach him your skills instead because satoru wholly believes his duty is not to serve as the bridge between his people and the moon, but instead to annoy you and hopefully make you mrs half-moon someday

[tleeaves]

There are two wolves inside me. One wants to embrace a new hobby in dance so I can be active and feel elegant and graceful and strong. This wolf wants to try something new and exciting, finally indulging in something I've always had an interest in.

The other experiences such frustrating emotions on a near daily basis that I want to go back to boxing, which is arguably easier to break into since I've already done it before. This wolf doesn't think of elegance, she just wants to fuck shit up until her body's so overworked and warm it fogs up car windows without having to do anything but sit inside.

Which one do I fucking feed??

[seldompathic]

I'm sure this will be fine :))

[ancha-aus]

Gifted Drabble - NewAgeAU - Required Feelings

Hey @spotaus !! As promised! A little thingie :3 As always. No worries about it being canon canon or not hahah. the end choice is up to you ;)

So Spot and I were talking about Killer and his story and it got me thinking about something we already established would happen and happened.

Mostly Killer's interest in Ccino. Because with everything going on with Killer? That makes that so much more interesting. Especially because Killer is still figuring out who he is after everything and Ccino is pretty much a social chameleon.

You guys ready? So here are some drabbles on pretty much a normal average day for Killer since coming to the castle!

Warnings: unhealthy relationships. slight sexual harrassment (not by the guys in focus but done by a background character.)

Also this got a... bit longer than planned... woops. i schemed too hard.

*--------------------------------------*

The last two months had been... strange.

Don't misunderstand. the training? brutal. But so good.

Killer never knew that it could be... fun to move and exercise.

He is so used to only running when he is running from the guards. He is so used to fighting only being adrenaline filled movements to keep the guards back so his best friend- ... so Chara could escape.

He is used to having to tug himself in tight places to hide. places that are uncomfortable.

Training with Nightmare is strange and difficult but fun.

The first time they sparred though?

Well... Killer is never afraid obviously. Chara said that being afraid is useless. But as Killer had stoof ready Nightmare had stopped. Tilted his skull at him and shaking his skull.

Killer had been terrified he had failed. Was his stance wrong? Was he not in the right defences postion? what did he do wrong? Please... He can do better.

Nightmar ehad walked over to him and looked at him calmly before saying that he wouldn't hurt him.

Killer had been frozen in place. because he knew that of course. Killer knows there is no use to training by hurting him. He learned that. Nightmare forced him to stop trianing and taking breaks at the start when he noticed that Killer was pushing himself to far. another difference from chara...

Nightmare had pretty much told him that his body didn't seem to agree with Killer. so that they would go back to Killer attacking him and Nightmare just blocking.

They haven't tried to spar yet since.

Killer sighs as he just wanders the halls. It is his thing at the moment.

When he isn't training, eating or sleeping. He likes to wander the grounds and area. explore a bit. Lay in the grass nad think about Ccino.

Sigh...

Ccino...

Killer is still unsure what to do with these... things he feels. He knows what this is of course. A stupid childish crush. Chara told him about them before. That people get stupid when they have tiny crushes. Especially when it is on someone that is way out of their league.

Killer had nobbed because it made sense. Chara would never have someone being out of their league. More that Chara was out of the league the other person was in.

So here he is... having a little crush on someone who is unobtainable.

Which Killer had known since the start so why did his stupid soul decide on this?

But... at the same time...

Killer looks outside as his mind wanders... His soul shifitng from the target to the more normal soul shape. Could you blame him? Ccino is... Ccino. He is so smart and everywhere and always so controlled and just always knows what to do and who is who...

Killer watches the forest in the distance and sighs wishfully... It would be easy.. especially now that he has a bit of gold... Tehy could get on one of the few horses together. and just ride off into the forest. They would keep going until they found a city where they could hide... Ccino and him. Just them...

He leans against the stone and smiles. Killer could show Ccino everything he knows from living in the city. How to get food where and how to dodge people. Ccino would be there for him. Help him and be nice and just... be there.

"Hello Killer."

Killer shotos upright and turns quickly. Only to come face to face with Ccino. Well not face to face as Ccino is a bit shorter but it is close.

Killer feels his body warm up slightly as he coughs to clear his throat of nothing but stupid nerves "Ccino! I didn't hear you." he grins "You sure you aren't a trained spy or guard yourself?"

Ccino tilts his skull and looks slightly amused "Very sure. I think i would notice the training for one." He looks around and looks through the window for a moment "I saw that you were just standing here and was wondering if something was wrong." and Ccino waits.

Oh gods what does he say? that he was just staring outside and thinking about the future they could ahve if they just made a break for it? that is not going to fly. oh fuck why are his hands sweaty.

Killer shrugs as he grins "Me thinking? You should know by now that i never think!" oh please just end him. what is he doing?!

Ccino frowns slightly before shaking his skull. Killer would feel bad about it but he has a tiny smile! That is something! that is something amazing!

Ccino looks back at him and frowns "Are you okay?"

Killer jsut... blinks at him... him... okay? of course he is okay? "Why wouldn't i be okay?"

Ccino keeps frowing as he just looks at him "Because your soul is a little... woobly... I was wondering if you are okay." he looks a lot stricter "If you aren't okay or feeling alright you need to tell us."

Killer however is... well he isn't NOT listening because how can he not listen to him? But Killer is sligthly panicking. of course his soul is woobly. Because his stupid soul is feeling stupid feelings about Ccino which just get worse when Ccino is here and what does he even say?! Wait! distract and redirect! Easy!

killer grins "Checking out my soul? You should take me on a date first."

WRONG DIRECTION! DIFFERENT DIRECTION! DON'T REDIRECT INTO THAT DIRECTION!

Ccino doesn't even blink at his very poor attempt at a flirt "Killer. I am being serious. Are you feeling okay? If you are sick you need to take time to rest and heal before anything else."

Killer snorts nad shrugs "Euh. I would be fine anyway. The king would probably hate me skipping training for something as stupid as me not feeling okay."

Ccino frowns at him "Killer... I know for sure that our king would much prefer you taking your time to heal and feel okay over you hurting yourself or getting sicker by pushing yourself too far."

Killer snorts as he mutters wiht a shrug "You jsut think that because you have priveledges..." which Killer immediantly regrets. it sounded like an insult or rude or whatever it is called.

Ccino shakes his skull as he mutters "No it is..." he sighs as he rubs his skull for a moment before focussing on him again. "Killer. I can assure you. I swear and promise. our king would not react poorly to hearing you are not feeling well." and he gives him this tiny tiny smile.

Killer feels weird and he has so many impulses and thoughts he doens't even know what to do at the moment. his body is unsure and killer jsut stays put as he looks to the side wiht a shrug.

Ccino watches him for a moment but doesn't push further. Instead he just nods as if Killer made any type of sense as he looks down the hall "Were you going to get dinner? it is about time for it."

Killer takes the out wiht both hands as he answers "I was going into that direction." and if he wasn't before he is now!

Ccino nods "Then we can walk together." he starts to turn and looks at him.

Killer feels his hadns get sweaty again. the impulse to hold the other. to just wrap his arms around the other and never let go. The need to pull him back and away. The other need to just sit with him and stare.

He can not be near him now. Ccino is offlimits and Killer is a mess.

Killer finds his voice "You know... now that i think about it... dinner? yeah... i dunno. Not exactly hungry... maybe you have apoint about me not feeling well. I am going back to my room and rest."

Ccino frowns at him but once again nods "okay. If you still feel ill tomorrow just tell one of the maids okay? Take it easy and try to get some sleep." and ccino walks away. towards the area to get food.

Killer rushes back to his room and falls on the bed. He groans long and loud. Why is he like this? why is this so hard and weird and strange?

Why does he never want it to stop.

Even so Killer jsut lays in the bed. feeling his soul slowly calm down from the racing pace it had been going. slowly it calms a calm pace and Killer thinks he slept for a bit.

Killer wakes up of course. He is hungry.

Ugh. this is what he gets for lying and skipping dinner.

Killer groans as he sits upright... he hopes there is some stuff still in the kitchen for him to raid and-

something in here smells delicious?!

Killer looks around and finds a plate of food on his nightstand. It is mashed potatoes with some greenery in it... hotchpotch? with something that looks like a large meatball and there is a tiny note.

Killer takes the note and reads it. It is ccino. telling him to take it easy and that he left him a meal for when he feels hungry.

Killer takes the plate. and while the food isn't hot anymore it is still warm. He takes a careful bite. but instead of chewing or swallowing he just waits and feels.

He enver realy had meals with intent before. Killer was never in a position to get those. And most restaurants places he took food from hadn't had a chef that cared enough to put intent in.

THe cooks here put a lot of intent in the food. Of nourishment mostly. the want that they feel good.

Killer didn't feel it right away so he doesn't think the normal cook made it. especially because it was chicken planned for dinner today.

He feels it.

It is weak and so light but it is there. Care. soft care from a magic that killer hadn't felt fully before. But the same care he could see shinign through Ccino's eye lights.

It feels like the magic... holds him. but not like guards grabbed him before. but softer and gentle and if he can break.

Killer only finishes his bite onces he absorbed every last bit the intent. He looks down adn ignores the fact that the goop from his sockets are dripping. that the goop is way more watery than normal.

-----

There are a lot of cats out in the castle.

Killer at first hadn't understood why.

Killer knew the church for nim used the animals as sacrifices. That he had...

Killer however also knew that Nightmare is very against sacrifices. If he learned anything in his four months here it was that. Nightmare hates everything that relates him back to his mother.

The news that nim and ngihtamre had been related... well... Killer will admit he had been looking back on those old fantasies or running away wiht a certain someone much more seriously.

But nightmare hated the old ways. He looked at them with disgust each time they were brought up and tried to make sure no situation happened where they woudl be needed. Killer is unsure what nightmare will do once something needs to happen that require those very things.

Maybe Nightmare will just keep refusing to do it. He seems to be very set on doing that.

Either way.

Cats.

So many of them.

Killer right now stands in a hallway. staring at a very sassy little grey with brown spots creature. The cat looks completely unimpressed with Killer.

Killer... hadn't tried to pet the cats yet. He had been... unsure...

Killer knows what he did. What he has done to these very creatures. The pain he caused their brothers and sisters before. Killer had the feelign the cats knew too. That they knew he was a terrible person who hurt those like them before.

Killer still really wants to go that direciton though... He has training with nightmare and nightmare and him had finally moved unto to sparing and Killer found it fun. He wanted to get all the time to spar that he could.

Killer stares down at the tiny creature "come on bud... I really need to go that direction."

The little grey and brown spotted cat looks unimpressed at him before rolling unto his back. showing that forbidden tummy.

Killer may never have petted a cat but he knows that is a trap. Killer shakes his skull "Can't do buddy... I know you will attack me."

The cat just does a slow blink at Killer. The picture of perfect innocence as he lays there. His eyes seeming to say 'why won't you pet me? aren't i cute? and don't i look soft?'

Killer slowly crouches down near the cat "I mean it bud. I need to go the direction you are blocking. Can you please move?" his hands slowly nears the cat. his hand is shaking lightly.

The cat makes that little mrp noise as he nuzzles the floor. wiggling in place.

Killer ligthly touches the cats side-

and the cat snaps to grab his hand with his little claws and bites it.

Killer yelps "ow! Hey! No fair!" the cat already let go and stands at the end of the hall. Looking very proud of himself before throtting off.

Killer glares as he jumps up "hey no wait!" he knows the library is there and Killer doesn't want the cat to start clawing stuf in there. the library is nightmare's pride and joy! he rushes after the cat "Hey! come back here!"

It takes amoment but he finds the cat and grins "There you are Bite!"

and amused voice "Bite?"

Killer turns around and Ccino is right by his side. Looking intrigued as he looks between Killer and the cat he had finally managed the corner.

Killer blinks and searches for the words "Yeah... Bite.. because he bites."

Ccino hums as he looks at the cat. He easily walks by Killer's side and killer tries not to shiver when their sides brush adn touch. Ccino crouches down and lets the cat sniff his hand for a moment. Ccino titls his skull as Bite just starts headbutting his hand and arm.

Waht a traitor.

Ccino chuckles as he picks Bite up and Bite purrs loudly and Killer swears the cat is staring at him smuggly

Ccino hums as he pets the cats "Sorry she bit you. cats need to learn not to see hands as toys. I think she thought you were trying to play with her."

Killer blinks "Her?"

Ccino nods "Yeah. Bite is a girl."

Oh gods please don't tell Killer that he officially named one of the cats and the name is BITE.

Killer rubs his hand "You sure it was just playing?"

Ccino nods "should be... did she do damage?" he frowns slightly.

Killer blinks and checks himself. No. no damage. huh. he shakes his skull "Nah. she didn't do damage... aside from emotional damage that is."

Ccino snorts and nods "Tehy are good at that. Well. I will take this little trouble maker in that case. You good luck at your training. Take the path behind the armour stand. It will take you right to the triaing area and you wn't be ridiculous late." and ccino opens his arms to let Bite jump out.

Killer shakes his skull "wait i euh... how come all the cats like you so much? are they yours?" he does remember the direction for later.

Ccino tilts his skull "They aren't mine. tehy are all strays... i guess they just like this place and see it as safe." a bit of a guilty smile "I do feed them however... which isn't helping the cat situation."

Killer snorts "must take a lot of money to pay for." maybe he can help a bit? share the costs?

Ccino shakes his skull wiht a smile "doesn't cost me anything. Ngihtmare just makes sure there are supplies for them in the castle." at the shocked look ccino smiles a bit softer "He knows I like them. So our king makes sure that they cna stay." he pets the feline by his feet "And what can i say? they are amazing pest control."

Killer laughs and nods "I can imagine. So how did you get them all to like you cat whisperer?"

Ccino looks amused but must be in a good mood as he decides to share his wisdom "Getting a cat to like you is easy. You just need to respect their boundaries and learn their language."

Killer fucking knew it! Killer grins "You can talk to them?"

Ccino blinks and looks a bit sheepish "oh no i can't. I meant... their body language. Cats communicate a lot with body language. Learn to read that a bit and you will know what a cat is annoyed or wants to be left alone. Then you respect their limits. if you are calm a cat is more likely to like you. and if you let a cat leave when it wants to they are more likely to return to you."

Killer gives a slow nod. huh..

Ccino nods "Etiher way. you got training that started like five minutes ago. Use the pathway i pointed out. See you around Killer." and he turns and leaves.

He turns the corner and Killer rushes after him to say thank you but- he is gone... Ccino must have used one of those pathways that the servants all use.

Bite is still by his side. she is looking at him with the most unimpressed look that Killer has ever seen on a cat.

Killer huffs and crosses his arms "What? it isn't like you would know how to trat a crush."

Bite clearly disagrees as she licks her paw before rubbing herself against his leg before throtting off. Looking confident and happy.

Killer sighs before jumping. shit his training! He rushes towards the armour stands and finds the servants path easily enough as he rushes towards the training room.

------

Killer is not sure if he even wants to be here.

Here, being, this stupid council get together thing.

Killer isn't even sure what it was. Just that there are a bunch of council members and old nobels. Something soemthing about it still being from Nim's time or something and Nightmare needing to deal with it.

Nightmare had asked if Killer had wanted to be there. Get a better feel for what normal guard duty was. So he could better understand why his duty was so much different.

Killer figured that it would be helpful. He had been here for six months now. a full half year. and while his training to be a Knight was progressing nicely he didn't know why it was special.

Nightmare had asked if he wanted to rotate with the guard for a while. to better understand their positions and jobs so he could see why his was different?

Killer had agreed.

and it was so different. His private room for one. but also the special training. the fact tha tnightmare would speka to him one on one and ask for his opinions and thoughts.

Being a knight... being a knigh was kinda like beign a personal guard and advisor in one go. It was a honour. and Killer jsut kinda.. stumbled into it.

Killer hadn't even been seriously concidering the job for the first three months he had been here! But then he got curious and figured he could stay and watcha bit longer. just a tiny bit couldn't hurt.

ccino walks by his row of guards and each guard quickly grabs some of the tiny snacks he offers. Ccino stops by a guard that doesn't grab one and gives thema look. the guard notices and eats the snack before ccinoe moves on. Killer grins at him as he grabs his snack and he gets agrin in return before ccino rushes of to take care of the other guards.

it also helps that ccino is here.

Killer is still unsure how ccino is just head of the house and not nightmare's main advisor and right hand. ccino is smart and clearly the most loyal of everyone in the kingdom. How could nightmare only let ccino be head of the house? sure it is a big role but killer doens't think it holds enough respect... but maybe that is just him.

Killer watches the nobel man and woman do their thing. he watches as advisors lean clsoe together to mutter and scheme. mmh. killer will have to point that out later to nightmare. make sure he noticed and knows there may be something brewing with those.

Killer still doens't get why Nightmare doesn't just fire them all. He is the king. he can do that. but someting about not wanting people to revolt or something. taking it step by step to clean it all out.

Euh. Not his job. at least not until he is a full knight.

For now he watches for trouble for Nightmare but everything seems fine... So his sight wanders to Ccino as he weaves through the crowds wiht a practise ease.

Killer is always enchanted by Ccino just. moving with ease and confidence. The way he knows how to move and never bump into anyone. How he gracefully dodges any hands or people stepping back.

Killer still watches of course as Ccino makes his way around the crowd. And he is reasonable near Killer, and Nightmare for that matter as Killer is positioned closest to him, when it happens.

Some nobel person Killer doesn't know who he is or why he is important and he doens't care. Reaches out and grabs Ccino right by the spine and rubs it.

Killer feels his hand for a fist as he moves his hand towards where his knife is stashed.

Ccino manages to twist free, which cna't be comfortable with how he was grabbed and manages to make space "Excuse. I didn't realise i was that close."

Killer has his knife in hand.

The nobel man smirks "If it isn't the pretty skeleton! I must say it is refreshing to still see you here! pretty as always." he looks him up and down and Killer gets ready. There isn't a straight line but Killer could be there within seconds.

"One of the better things of Nim! giving you your job for us all to have something pretty to stare at." the man laughs.

Ccino has a iron hold on his own face as he remains calm "The old king's name should not be spoken. As our own king rules now."

the man smirks before frowning "Though you have let yourself go! Already much fatter than before. such a shame and waste of a pretty face. Though I am sure it would still be fun to have a night together. Especially if we invite some of my business partners-"

And Ngihtmare is there. He grabs the nobel man and throws him across the hall into the wall. Killer can hear bones break and crack form his place.

People gasp and move towards his side but Killer isn't paying attention to that. He seems to be the only one who watches their king and ccino.

Nightmare looks beyond furious. His tentacles are all posed and sharp. ready to strike. He lowers himself and it reminds Killer of the big cats. How they get ready to strike.

A hand on Nightmare's shoulder.

Nightmare turns with a glare but meets ccino's unflinching face. Ccino just shakes his skull at Nightmare.

Ngihtmare breathes heavily and killer cna feel the rage in the air. Is he the only one who notices? because he is already getting sensitive to their king?

Nightmare glances back to the man on the ground and ccino shake shis skull agian. He straightens his spine, killer can see the pitch of pain on his face and nightmare clearly does to as his rage just increases. Ccino shoots him another look. He striaghtens his spine and stands still before looking pointedly atnightmare.

Ngihtmare pants but stands up striaght.

Ccino nods and rolls hsi shoudlers before relaxing them both. Killer can see his hand is still slightly shaking but he forms a fist and forces it still.

Nightmare breaths and his shoulders relax and wiht it his tentacles unsharpen.

Ccino raises a hand and waves it by his face. when his face has gone by his face turned from his frown to a neutral face.

Nightmare takes another deep breath but his face calms down.

Ccino nods and takes a few steps back. his arms and hands hidden behind his back but killer can see them shake slightly.

Ngihtmare walks over ot the nobels "As you should know by now. I do not take kindly to those who dare to threaten those who fall under my employment. I employ them in in trade for their service I keep them safe and comfortable. Yet you dare to enter my home, on my invitation, and threaten those around us? Those who work hard to ensure you have a pleasant evening? you will be removed and stripped of your title. Leave." he waves his hand and returns to his throne but on the way he stops by Killer.

Killer stands ready.

Nightmare mutters "Get Ccino to the healer. You are to make sure he gets there safely and gets to his room safely where he can rest." he eyes the knife that killer still has in his hand and looks appreciative of it. before schooling is face again and nodding. Not once mentioning that he saw the weapon which is very much not part of the normal guard equipment.

Killer nods and bows "Of course my king." and he rushes to ccino's side with a cheerful grin. hiding his own rage under easy company.

He will make sure ccino is fine. Then... when killer earned his right as knight and when he is allowed solo trips... he will make a special trip to the nobel.

after all. if he doesn't have hands he can never make a grab to anyone ever again.

-----

Killer sighs as he pets the cat in his lap. eight months. eight months since his life changed twice over. first wiht chara leaving him behind. abandoning him. and then him taking the deal with nightmare.

So muhc had changed. He had changed.

Killer pets the cat sleeping peacefully in his lap. It is still so strange. That he is still here. He hadn't... he never wanted... it hadn't been the plan to stay.

But after a while. Leaving seemed even worse of an idea.

Killer just dind't like the idea of leaving anymore.

Just until he uncovers the secrets.

Just until he satisfies his curiosity.

Just until he is over his crush.

All three misions failed.

But instead of feeling like it is time to cut his losses and move on. Killer just continues to want to stay here.

Killer sighs as he leans agianst the wall.

very soft steps and Killer grins as he looks over. Ccino turns to corner and tilts his skull at him "Well don't you look cozy." he takes a glance and smiles "I see Bite finally stopped attacking your hand every second."

Killer snorts "nah." he raises his bites covered hand "She just got tired." and he goes back to petting her.

Ccino nods as he walks over "How is your training doing?"

Killer nods "good." and that is the problem. because it is going well. Nightmare told him as much. Killer would soon have his first mission and he is worried.

What if he can't do it?

what if he can do it but doens't want to?

what is he can do it. does it. but dind't want to do it?

is the loyalty he feels... for nightmare? or for the idea that he has to be loyal.

He isn't sure.

Ccino nods "that is good." he tilts his skull at him "excited to be a full knight?"

Killer is feeling ballsy today. reckless even. Killer grins at ccino "What if i don't want to be a knight?"

Ccino doens't flinch and instead tilts his skull "I mean... you would ahve spend a long time training for soemthing you didn't want... so i figured you would have realised earlier."

Killer shrugs "waht if i did? but ust wanted more training?"

Ccino looks a thim and shrugs "I don't believe that. I think you want to be a knight."

Killer glares "And what makes you think that?"

Ccino smiles atiny bit "emotions and intent. If you hadn't wanted it. you wouldn't have tried so hard and made progress this quickly."

Killer blinks and looks forwards "What if i just believed it is what i wanted?"

Ccino shrugs "They yuo have to make a carreer switch."

Killer snorts "Oh yeah. Nightmare is going to be fine with that." he rolls his eyes.

Ccino lokos amused "Yes out king." he stresses the title "Will be fine wiht that."

Killer shoots him a look "oh come on! I knew there is more going on over him just being your king and you just being a loyal servant."

Ccino looks forwards wiht a tiny smile "I have no idea what you are talking about. Only those most trusted by the king would know personal affairs of the king." and he grins.

Killer looks amused "Okay. what if i just become knight to learn all the secrets. and then when i am saticfied i will just leave." he knows he is looking at him smugly.

Ccino tilts his skull amused "Relaly now? When you figure out all the secrets?"

Killer nods "indeed."

Ccino laughs "good luck with that." and he starts walking away.

Killer tilts his skull at him "What is that suposed to mean?!"

Ccino stops and glances backwards "You are a smart cookie. you will figure it out." and he turns around the corner.

At this point Killer knows better than to try and follow ccino. He will be gone before Killer can even get to the corner. probbaly on the other side of the castle already.

Killer keeps forgetting to ask him how he does it.

....

euh.

He will eventually ask him... Maybe...

after all...

He will only leave once he learns all the secrets...

So maybe keeping one or two in tact is a great idea...

You know...

Just because he is curious. And no other reason at all.