#But anyways now I have pretty nails!!!!!
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Doing my nails while watching the literall season Finale>>>
(Also it was only season one so there is more to comeš)
#Like literally 14 seasons more to come...#But anyways now I have pretty nails!!!!!#There Black with golden Symbols on the point- and ringfingerš#But maybe next time i'll keep them all Black...#Let's be real thats probably not gonna happen#Cause I went from rainbow to Black nails in an hour...#That describes my mental state realy well...
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Guess who I finally finished properly
Bonuses
#gamer txt.#al art#madness combat#mag agent torture#crochet#sewing#hes been clean and handless for so long but now he's himself again#anyways been doing this the last couple of days#did the blood over the last 2 days because i was procrastinating doing it around the nail heads#and did the hands today because little mittens like that are pretty easy actually#im quite proud if this#i know he was already finished and i just did him up a little but still i think he looks way better now#and he has hands! i have 3 madcom plushies and he was the only one to not have hands it was fucked up#do i tag blood?#blood tw#just in case
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i know it's probably a bad idea to date someone based on a shared hyperfixation but i really wanna date someone based on a shared hyperfixation
#okay not REALLY but it would be cool to date someone who also likes cartoons in general and wouldn't judge me for my strange addiction#the addiction being ed edd n eddy of course#i know its pretty normal to be into anime these days and i mean i can maybe work with an anime gf#but i dont watch it and dont really want to start....maybe for the right person.....#disney is a hard no though#honestly im cool being single but it is getting a bit boring ngl#i was on a couple dating apps recently and jesus christ they were so bad i deleted my accounts within 24 hours#nothing but polyamorous shenanigans#āi have a husband but im looking for a girl for myselfā#āš keep lookin babe#im not gonna play second fiddle to some family guy pj pants wearing wannabe twitch streamer with dirt under his finger nails#anyway ill shut up now#im going out dancing tonight and i know im not gonna meet anyone but i need an excuse to dress up#wish me luckš¤
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Hello!
If you're not too busy, would you mind listing some of the things you think count as death flags for Mr. Spender?
There's the obvious fact that he's the "old" mentor to group of young protagonists, but what else do you think would count?
OHH BOY ok so I'd think I'm a crackpot for this but since we're talking about Zack "Foreshadowing" Morrison. I have some thoughts
No harm in leading with the (chronologically) first thing that jumped out at me:
This one IMMEDIATELY made me antsy whenever I came back to it after my initial read, and considering Zack has referred to it on twitter in the past as one of their favorite jokes it's definitely not been forgotten about.
Second, the sheer amounts of near-misses, jokey or not, of Spender narrowly avoiding specifically lightning
Again, not much, but it's weird that it happened thrice, latter two of which had real gravitas rather than an one-off joke.
And third, Spender himself. He's repeatedly shown himself to be kind of a self sacrificing idiot, as well as prideful to a fault. Granted, it's both him and Mina trying to take on all the responsibility of saving Mayview and its inhabitants from their fate.. But Spender is exactly that right measure of doesn't-value-himself-enough (chest footprint aftercare or lack thereof), having an obscene amount of power (enables his loner act + pride) and poor judgement that has the capacity to put him at great risk. And it has!
Spender has not only shown low enough self-esteem to view himself as the de-facto scapegoat for the safety of the town, but also prideful enough to make very bad calls that end up in people, often himself, hurt (COUGH FORGE INCIDENT COUGH)
This is all conjecture, but it's definitely enough to make me worried about him :') Even if all this doesn't mean he'll necessarily die he's definitely getting (even more) seriously injured at some point. I love the guy but he's so far doing a horrible job of convincing me he wants to live bad enough to circumvent at least that
#not art#admin answers#paranatural#pnat#richard spender#pts-fic-notes-and-blog#before i continue on with tag ramble i just want to say tysm for leaving an ask!#none of my friends read this so ive been stewing on these thoughts for some months and i loved finally sharing them#this isn't exactly proof but the hijack possession seemingly being the final nail in the coffin for his and isabel's relationship.#idk it feels significant to me. thats one more tether to support kinda gone. someone who knows him well enough to know he's unwell#he seems not exactly content but fr incapable of not burning bridges as he is now. and considering how rashly he acts he REALLY needs those#to not do stupid shit all the god damn time with no buffer other than Lucifer. who for his measured approach to rick's hotheadedness#has honestly shown himself to be pretty lenient and kinda bad at controlling spender's more (self) destructive tendencies? so he dont count#to be clear i love spender to bits but he is dumb as rocks and has all the self preservation of a fruit fly. it needs to be said#also the lightning man... idk its WEIRD like especially on the reread its the thing that most consistently threatens him! it repeats#sure he gets chewed by a bat and banged up by forge but?? he somehow always comes back to lightning. catnine has it out for him#its something i didnt even really put together until i continued reading the flashback chapter AFTER getting this ask and went OHHHGNHF#which the only reason lightning is such a non issue is lucifer's powers. which belong to his sunglasses and not to the spirit in him#so its not like they can't be taken away he's just got a really good excuse for having those on all the time#TAGS GETTING SO LONG. ANYWAYS. i hope this is comprehensible lol
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Magic school nails šš®āØļø
#collecting all this purple stuff together like im a bowerbird#actually i might have been a bowerbird in my past life thatd suit me#anyway these are fun i like em#i did these ate friend chicken and then passed out for 3 hours. all in all pretty good friday#and on actual good friday too lol#might go make a dessert now š¤#nail art#skz
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I was wondering if there are any rare happy ritsu moments in ur zombie au since hes always miserable I think,, like is he always miserable or is he happy/not miserable and feeling kinda good sometimes?
VWHDGDGD NO YEAH OFC HE'S HAPPY SOMETIMES im just horrible and enjoy putting him through misery
ive never been able to get a genuine smile to look right on his face in my art style either i think thats part of it. as ive said his face is just built to be mildly uncomfortable and bothered and i lean into it sm it's starting to get kinda funny
but yes ritsu is happy plenty! i think, canonically, he just seems like the type of person to me that tends to turn lemonade back into lemons. he's easy to scare and his first reaction to things is often Dread and Anxiety. he dwells on the negatives a lot and seems to be a "hope for the best, expect the worst," kinda guy, but there's a section in this post abt shigeo always loving the little things in life, and ritsu steadily learns throughout the journey on how to do that and how healing it can rly be. even if he had to grow up too fast during this whole thing and learn things a kid should never have to, the journey also gave him some good insight and lessons in other places! ritsu is smart, he figures it all out
in terms of little things here n there he's the happiest lil guy on the planet when he finds one of his favorite foodsāswings his legs while he sits and munches on a kitkat bar like he's got absolutely nothin in the world to worry abt. sometimes mob does smth funny that he laughs at; for the longest time i've had this silly image in my head of mob accidentally knocking down a bucket from a store shelf and it lands on his head and he just kinda stands there and makes noises.when the noises continue out of pure curiosity about the weird echoey quality it's giving them ritsu cannot help but lose it
besides tiny things tho, when tome comes around ritsu in general is a lot happier, just cuz he has somebody to talk to that will actually respond in some way. they're sorta reluctant partners in crime at first (at least on ritsu's end) but over time and over bonding they grow to rly like each other's presence. they bicker constantly but it's almost always fond eventually, and they shove each other and playfight until mob gets antsy enough to get worked up about it. rly, tome is a godsend to ritsu's mental healthāafter months and months of being effectively alone with his thoughts, he finally has another person to converse with. a person His Age, too!
tome is rly good at knowing when ritsu is thinkin himself into oblivion and she's Also rly good at being the most annoying girl on the planet to yank him outta that and replace any misery with Oh My God Get Off Me You Freak. she doesn't even do this on purpose at first, but over time she learns how to tell when he's thinking too hard and, ofc, she's grown attached and she cares, so she's as obnoxious as possible to lighten the mood
when they find reigen n teru, ritsu gradually gets Much happier still. now that he knows they're safe and the gang is finally back together (and now that there's an Adult present and he can relax a lil and let himself be taken care of) his stress levels r exponentially lowered. having teru back is another instant lift to his moodāim always a big fan of teru and ritsu friendship, and i think adding tome to their dynamic simply makes it more chaotic. truly a trio of the 3 most normal teenagers in existence which will surely bring nothing but good (reigen sweats offscreen)
actually this makes me feel bad for forever torturing him im gonna go draw happy zau ritsus brb ,.,.ok imback <3
#qktalks#anon#zombie au#tw guns#<- for that glock in the corner . sorry#actually it looks like he's at gunpoint in that one and just going teehee about it#he looooooves tormenting tome .and tome loves tormenting him. it's their favorite pastimes#i don't rly like the second one too much tbh the sleeves are weird but i think that's just the Nature of how poofy they can get#oh this is a great time to talk abt their dynamic. sorry.this ask isn't abt that.but now it is#so i realize that tome and ritsu ??? don't rly interact in canon at all. and neither do tome and teru . as a matter of fact#but consider. uhm.what ifthey did <3 GVYIEAV#like i said they're all So incredibly normal it'll make for a great time#^ genuinely i do think so actually. most of the time anyway#i touched on it a lil bit in recondite but i rly like the idea of mob ritsu tome and teru all being a friend group#teru would undoubtedly piss tome off sometimes she'd call him out on his bullshit#but like.in terms of the canon timeline i think post-mob teru would Totally listen to her#and take what she says abt How he is into consideration. he's trying to rebuild himself into somebody better#teru and ritsu already have a dynamic in canon but it feels pretty loose and it isn't fully explored at all#i think they work together rly well tho. there's no real evidence to the contrary iirc i think they work together in canon quite well#they think alike in terms of fighting#and in a setting like thisā once teru is on the same page as ritsu on zombiesā they're prolly a pretty damn good team#there's a lot of room for things to go wrong tho#if i had to sum it up rly succinctly it'd be: ritsu's motive is fearā tome's motive is curiosityā and teru's motive is power#what i mean by teru's being power is Not the pre-mob teru ''wanting'' to be powerful and unstoppable#i mean teru wants to have power over everything that is trying to hurt them#he doesn't Want to cower he wants to Fight tooth and nail#and i think ritsu's fear versus tome's curiosity and teru's drive of power conflicts a lot#ritsu is passive in the sense that he'll do anything in his power to avoid altercations with anything to order to keep mob safe#he isn't Active until something goes Wrong. and usually things go Wrong when teru and tome rush ahead#WOW sorry i went on a rant that was Completely unrelated to the fucking question. im at the 30 tag limit bye
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old ocs that i now have decided are pure boy x rebel boy
#yes theyre gay š¼#in the original story i had them in the one was implied to be gay for the other anyway so this isnt all that different#not really sure if kierans smoking weed or just a cigarette i havent decided yet but its up to interpretation i guess#hes holding it like a cigarette but his eyes are reddish#idfk š#also yes their nails are painted#also yes there are very slightly visible police lights#pretty swag i think tbh#i hated this sm when it was just the lineart but now i really like how it turned out#took like 2 hours-ish#idfk i dont have any concept of time#clip studio doesnt have any time taken thing like ibis#hello tag reader
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#last month i wrote some tags about how i needed to leave my nails alone because i was getting extensions#in the hopes that i would finally stop biting my nails after doing it almost my whole life#well it FUCKING WORKED#i got gel x tips and i loved them sooooo much#but they kept coming off because i have to do so much with my hands especially in water lol#and i have tiny fingers too so the sizes she had weren't quite right#she redid the ones that came off for free for the whole three weeks i wore them!#so i bought her some new tips in tiny person sizes as a thank you lol#for her to use on other clients tho because she recommended this gel overlay system she likes#I've been wearing it for like a week and a half and they are still FLAWLESS#so I'm never going back to anything else lol i'm going to keep getting these pretty much forevwr#but anyway the important part is. that i no longer put my fingers in my mouth to destroy my nails and cuticles#i have real grownup hands now and it's AMAZING#my nail plate is reattaching to my nail bed!!!! like the bed is getting longer#they'll eventually reach the actual tips of my fingers the way theyre supposed to š#and the gel keeps the nails hard and almost fucking unbreakable#i had to replace my compulsion to bite/chew with the compulsion to apply cuticle oil lol but it's SO WORTH IT#i look at pictures of how my hands used to look just two months ago and i cant fucking believe i lived that way for DECADES#and i guess this is especially significant for me because my hands have always been a source of shame#not just because my nails were fucking gross and fucked up. but because i have TINY HANDS#like really small hands. not proportionate to my body. AT ALL#especially when i put my hands near my head because i have a slightly larger than average head lmaooo#and my fingers are very thin and just. i have small hands. very weak.#i cant even snap my fingers and make a sound#(do NOT instruct me. i know how to do it. i have been trying my whole life. its not physically possible for my fingers to make that sound)#so having nice nails really fucking helps me š„¹#like i can be proud of my hands even if theyre small#and i dont feel the need to hide them anymore
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by pure evil accident taob zuko's current mental state is the exact same as the one ive been stuck in for the past few weeks and that's a bit funny to me. like i started writing this chapter months ago and knew what i was doing with it even longer ago and suddenly ive manifested it into reality. we are both facing the horrors rn
#when the angry character finally learns to acknowledge their rage not as its own problem but as a coping mechanism to the problem#& faces at once the relief of finding the source of all this anger & the horror of realising that the anger itself was never the final boss#and it leaves them in a depressive state where they actually MISS the anger because at least that was active and - in a sense - dignified#whereas this just feels stilted and mopey and like each day is passing and you're losing time doing nothing#but you cant shake it anyway and wow im no longer talking about zuko!!!! we stay embarassing ourselves over taob!!!!#like i realised just now while staring off into space stirring my tea that the reason this particular depressive episode has hit me so hard#(aside the fact it's been a pretty extreme one and my paranoia has rlly flared up to the point ive felt honest to god CRAZY lately haha)#is because it's so DIFFERENT to how i usually respond to feeling like this#like normally my temper gets very quick and i completely isolate and i get mean and sharp#and i convince myself that everyone is out to get me and/or hates me and therefore i must manipulate everyone in my life#and ofc NONE OF THOSE THINGS ARE A GOOD RESPONSE. I AM NOT PROUD OF THEM#THEY ARE ALSO NOT NEARLY AS BAD AS HOW I USED TO BE HENCE I KNOW I AM GETTING BETTER#SLOWLY PAINFULLY WITH MY NAILS DIGGING IN THE DIRT BUT I AM GETTING BETTER ALL THE SAME#but STILL despite how awful those things are they're also very external. like i hurt the people around me in order to protect myself#and there's a dignity to that. there's more control there even if ultimately it's a lack of control causing it#like i have some fucked opinions from my upbringing and ik that like im quite a selfish person and it's bc i was raised to truly believe#that hurting others is always optimal over letting myself be seen as weak. like if my options are to hurt someone even someone i love#or let myself be vulnerable then sometimes i STILL will pick the former (it used to be all the time though <3 progress is progress)#and anger has always been sold to me as a very dignified STRONG emotion and it's how you're SUPPOSED to respond to badness#otherwise you're weak and a baby and pathetic etc etc#and just bc you know something is wrong doesnt mean you didnt internalise the fuck out of it anyway#like i will always see anger as the 'dignified' emotion and unlearning it regardless of that has been one of the hardest things ive done#('wow hella your own journey with mental illness is the literal exact same as taob zuko's-' i will hospitalise the both of us)#whereas currently ive just been sad and pathetic and oversharing to anyone who will listen and desperate for someone to look at me#and be like 'you're not okay' and to fix it FOR ME. like im not ANGRY im SAD and im not used to that response#AND GUESS WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENS THIS CHAPTER BY PURE FUCKING COINCIDENCE?? LITERALLY WHAT#like it's been happening for a few chapters that we're finally moving from anger to sadness on my unofficial healing chart#ever since zuko's outburst with hakoda when zi se had that tantrum#but this is the first time we see Sad Coping Mechanism as a response to a problem instead of Angry Coping Mechanism#taob updates
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if you have nice hands/nails literally kill urself <3 peace and love <3
#sorry I am just feeling UPSET !!!!#im v tired of being embarrassed about my hands/skin issues ā¦#I wanna have pretty nails so bad#and there was like a brief moment (like.. a yearā¦ before lockdowns lol) where I would do get my nails done#and it boosted my confidence sm with it all#but now Iām just too ashamed/embarrassed again ā¦ā¦. š£#Iād go get my nails done again but I wouldnāt wanna go to the same place as before b/c they were kinda mean#so idk where I could goā¦. and I also donāt want to have to explain why my skinā¦ looks like thatā¦#and I know for a fact some places would just not want to do my nails b/c the skin is so damaged lol#also I simply can not afford to get my nails done ā¦ā¦. hmmā¦ā¦ā¦ oh well#anyway !#sorry I just needed to vent#a
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how the fuck do i be a woman. video tutorials appreciated
#gender#iām glad i came out so early bc it meant i was in as many pplās faces as possible w it but#now that iām entering adulthood and entering an era that is WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY more feminine than i have been or have let myself be in the#past. i donāt fucking know how to be a girl. i was born as one but idk how to be one#and i understand ānot wearing makeup doesnāt make you less of a womanā and#āyou define your femininityā and āyou donāt have to xyz to be a ladyā#but a lot of what i define as femininty in myself is classical āthis is for GIRLS!!!!ā things#i want to do makeup and dress pretty and do my nails and have long hair and long eyelashes and a soft voice#but idk how to do a lot of that and atp iām way to embarrassed to ask#iām 21 almost 22 and (FOR ME PERSONALLY THIS APPLIES TO ME ONLY NO ONE ELSE)#i wish i had figured out how to be my birth gender before hopping to a different one. idk#anyways#sera speaks
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idk what nail biter needs to hear this but do not start messing with your cuticles, you will never recover from it
#:(((((#when i was younger i wasnt even a biter. i just picked my nails short#but then i evolved to biting somehow at some point#and then now its biting and cuticle destruction#my fingers are always bloody and im having to constantly swap out bandaids but nothing ever heals because whenever the skin comes back the u#the urge to tear it off is too strong#and then it gets to the point where your hands literally change shape and do not go back#like the skin on my right thumb is an entirely different shape than my left thumb. i cannot remember the last time it was smooth and normal#it makes you feel so self conscious about your hands its awful#all i want is pretty hands#at one point i forced myself to grow my nails out and i managed like. two weeks!!!! which was huge#since ive been biting nonstop for years#and i painted them and everything#but when they got too long i imemdiately reverted to biting instead of just clipping them#anyways. all that to say#if you are just a biter? do not evolve to the next stage#leave your cuticles the way they are im begging you#cathy says words#nail biting
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OOP Tam's a bun now! Long story, will put in the tags, but aside from an adjustment in name/backstory/colors, she's still the same grump.
#tamarin opal-eyed#jesus how many name changes has she gone through lmao#v'tamarin kihb#just for the transition#I spent like uuuhhh all last week really struggling with tam#because I've really wanted to nail down her backstory and develop her more but I don't love how she meshes with the weirdness of suncatte t#and no matter which way I looked at it I couldn't get it to work to my satisfaction so it was starting to feel like a real 'kill your darli#plus I'd been fighting to find things in her color scheme that looked good with her skintone in game etc etc#so in an effort to fall back in love with my character I grabbed another character of mine--a gothy viera made more for ff12#and I smooshed them together 'cuz they were already pretty similar lmao#so here's tam in bun form! she has opal-y eyes (hence the name) and considers herself unlucky#went from having a complicated mom relationship to a complicated relationship with The Wood ff12 style#I saw someone theorize that 14!viera don't listen to the wood exactly like 12 but more like hearing the elementals in gridania? I like tha#anyway she can't do that lmao so she threw a young person tantrum and left to explore and find new horizons#in just like...so many desert places lmao she's still a desert dweller at heart after going from dalmasca to thavnair to thanalan#but now with a lil more goth hehehe#so while the name and race might've changed at least a lot of her aesthetics and home-feels are the same
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got my nails done for the first time btw i fear this will become an addiction
#personal#tangentially related this is the longest my nails have ever been bc i have been biting them since like age 3 and canāt do that now without#wrecking the nails obviously (have held off by just running my teeth along the underside of them) also there is a centipede on my#wall/ceiling rn wtf anyway i have no idea how i feel abt it theyr e so clickety clackety now which is a definite plus but also i am not a#fan of them often touching things before my fingers do and Also my nails feel like. dirty? like it feels like thereās smth stuck under them#or smth but therrās Not i run my other nails along the underside of them constantly (another way to stop myself from biting them) and wash#them and also have used a toothpick a couple times which im not sure im supposed to do that sounds damaging but my point is that there is#not anymore dirt under there than usual it just feels. wrong. i think bc theyāre bigger/heavier when longer it just feels like there mus#be smth there?? idk. but anyway this is just a minor annoyance and will probably fade as i get used to the length. it was so fun picking a#design tho and they are very pretty and there are so many other ideas out thereā¦ but on the other hand i suspect it would be much more#here than where i got them done (greece where everything i encountered was startlingly cheap) which. hm. the centipede has disappeared in#the time it took me to type all of this which is deeply suspicious. ok
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I love you small table that I use as a night stand that I got for the pretty design and from the side of the rode and walked it home like 10 blocks but you can't see the pretty design because like all flat surfaces it became a dump ground for more than I planned it to have <3
#like lets see what i got on here..#soda can. two waterbottles (both empty). Arizona tea. glass jar with paint peelings. dirty fork. vinegar soray bottle. 4 towels.#backpack charms i found on the ground. tin full if my small sea themed things. giant pile cleaner. necklace. nail clipper.#gratitude notebook. leds lights switcher. melatonin gummies. like 5 soda tab tops. wrappers.. so many wrappers. sucker stick.#a dead bug :(#okay so currently its not so bad but normally theres a LOT more and a LOT more obscure items.#idk its just sad i picked this tabke up from the curb bc its pretty and now you cant even see the pretty:/#autism#actually autistic#maybe adhd#idk to be honest#probably adhd#anyways i also have this old cushion chair thats just beautiful but it doesnt fit in my room so its on my porch#and there was like a diner chair that i also got from the side of the rode that coincidentally matches the cushion chair#i see so much furniture that is still good get tossed to the road and it makes me sad cuz i cant take it bc i have no room :(
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I have... my boarding pass....
And I still have to do the tips distribution tomorrow morning š«š«š«š«š«
#speculation nation#i was like 'oh yeah i could still do that i'll make time'#now that im actually on my time off im like. but do i Really gotta...?#i will. i will...#i just might try to dodge out of the manager meeting tomorrow night lol bc i DO NOTTTT WANNA#and being halfway across the country seems like a pretty good reason to not lol#like yea it's a phone meeting Normally. no i dont wanna.#it is a weight off my shoulders tho to have dealt with the boarding pass#and i checked my bag to make sure it fit the dimensions. it will! just might have to squeeze it a lil#im not paying for a carry on bag lol so ive just got the personal item. but thats ok#i just wear my boots all the time Anyways & i dress light in the summer by default#i'll wear my bulkier clothes. my jacket and my black cargo pants. to the flight#so that i dont have to worry about fitting it in my bag :P#i wanna Have pants and a jacket just in case#might might as well save my backpack space for my several different tank tops and my two different short shorts#im a simple bitch. when it's hot i dress slutty. as is my right.#ughhhh i wanted to paint my nails tonight too.. ughhhhhhh#guess i should do that Now... it's the best time for it.......
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