#But I really want him to

[saltpepperbeard]

Just throwing another spanner into the angst machine because I love your long pots lol.

Do you think Stede doesn't open up to Ed about his traumas because he probably thinks Ed wouldn't love him anymore if he did??

oh, why thank you, darling anon! that's so very sweet of you. but also-

hhhHHHHNGKDFGLJKLFGHDJKLFD. PAIN. PAIN AND SUFFERING LMAO. 🎵EASY LIKE SUNDAY MORNNNING🎵 IS NO LONGER ACCURATE I GUESS.

*laying face down on the ground for the Umpteenth Time* but sure yeah anon let's boogie-

I think that's definitely part of the equation, yes. But I also think a large part of it is the fact that he's basically been conditioned to hide his vulnerability away from a very young age. When he was a child, he was mocked relentlessly for being softer or showing his emotions in a way that was unacceptable/unconventional from a masculinity standpoint. He was even slapped with the nickname "Baby Bonnet" for said vulnerability.

Not only that, but his own father disapproved of his softness too. Calling him "lily-livered" is calling him weak and cowardly. And he had it drilled into his skull that that's "all he would ever be," and that it was a bad thing to show any sort of soft underbelly.

And it didn't even end there! Those phantoms chase him all the way into adulthood. There are so many instances of people making digs at him for crying, or for being "weak," or for being "cowardly." Like lol lord; the pilot lays it all on super thick. He's just constantly surrounded by the narrative that opening up spells pain and suffering for him. There's no safety in opening up.

And so he hides away. Numerous times throughout the series, he isolates himself to cry. Numerous times throughout the series, he shoves his own problems down to address other issues first. He experiences so many situations where it would be more than appropriate for him to react with weepiness or anything equivalent, but he swallows it all down.

Not to mention, that he's very set on helping others. He puts other's needs before his own. And I think that's a classic sign of emotional neglect; giving others the treatment you wish you had gotten. ((...nOT THAT I'D KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THAT HSDKSHLK))

ALSO, I think that's why he has so many issues with self-worth and his own masculinity. It plays into why he flies off the handle in episode 6 into episode 7. He thinks he has to perform a certain kind of way. He thinks he's not worthy of respect or recognition unless he conforms to those societal standards. He thinks no one will regard him unless he's "strong," or "ruthless," or "hardened." Which, again, is why I think the way he acts in season 2 is very much in-character for him. Heartbreaking, and very difficult to stomach, but in-character all the same. It's not him. It's never been him. But he thinks it should be.

AND YES, it definitely plays into his relationship with Ed too, which makes me want to just start foaming at the mouth and biting at his ankles. Because like...he's so wrapped up in those painful expectations that he's totally blind to the fact that Ed loves him for who he actually is. Ed fell in love with the silly little guy who had so many trinkets, clothes, and books. Ed fell in love with silly little guy who was so different than all the other pirates around them. Ed fell in love with the silly little guy who read his crew bedtime stories, and went on treasure hunts, and swapped out books in raids as opposed to just outright stealing.

Ed loves his sweet, fantastic, simple goldfish. And Stede doesn't even see that yet.

Season 2 makes it very clear that Stede thinks he has to shove all of that down even around Ed. Like, the dream sequence in the first episode? He dreams of himself being masculine, hardened, and ruthless, killing in coldblood and subsequently "winning" Ed. Again, that's who he thinks he has to be, and that's who he thinks Ed wants. Why would Ed want someone who's softer and loves extravagance? Why would Ed want someone who picks flowers and stops to appreciate the simpler things? Why would Ed want someone who sobs about his past?

No one else does.

[unsung-idiot]

don't show him modern technology; it won't end well

bonus under the cut:

[do-you-know-this-queer-character]

Do you know this queer character?

Castiel is Queer and Agender or Genderfluid, and uses varying pronouns based on presentation!

[feltcreature]

a friend :o)

[eydilily]

this is fine

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

elita pep talk

[egophiliac]

gargoyle Mal is everything I've ever dreamed of and more. his little raincoat! his umbrella! I hope he really does have big ol' stompy rainboots to splash around in puddles in. I hope they have little faces on them.

(Twst please give me Malleus having a rainy day adventure, this is everything I need right now)

[detentiontrack]

When Mabel comes out to Stan, she’s really scared that he’s going to reject her and have an issue with it, so she’s emotional and asks him if he still loves and supports her and he’s just like “??? Kid I’ve been telling you all summer I’m one of the LBTGs” and then it’s her turn to be like “wait what??” because she thinks he had never mentioned a sexuality before, and it turns out Stan had been constantly telling the kids that he’s “ambidextrous” because he thought it meant the same thing as bisexual.

[chloesimaginationthings]

William is the most divorced man in the FNAF universe

[musubiki]

my favorite fields of mistria boys 🥰

[fairsweetlonging]

truth serum / system reveal au where shen qingqiu gets hit with an uncloaking spell that reveals the system in the reflection of his eyes every time it pops up.

during one of his missions, in the treasure hoard of some dragon-like creature, he finds a golden, oval shaped hand mirror, its gaudy style more victorian based than anything (airplane you hack!), that doesn't seem to do anything when he looks into it. but when he does, it reveals the system's screen in his eyes.

he doesn't notice this, of course, because he can't see it, and the system, surprisingly, stays quiet.

the peak lords think he's cursed.

maybe mu qingfang is the first to notice, during the mandatory post mission check-up, when shen qingqiu is scrolling through his most recently accumulated points and mu qingfang can see the strange vividly-blue lines reflected in his pupils. it's gone when shen qingqiu blinks, like it was nothing but a trick of the light.

it comes out when yue qingyuan is visiting and, just as he's done laying out the plans for a new mission, shen qingqiu's eyes glaze over and a bright blue box takes over the whole of his iris. shen qingqiu goes quiet; the thing in his eyes moves, shifts, pulses for a second, like static worms crawling all over his pupils. then he blinks, and it's gone, and shen qingqiu accepts the mission that yue qingyuan was almost sure he would decline.

maybe there is an intervention, when the peak lords corner shen qingqiu at qian cao peak and try to figure out what's wrong, subjecting him to all kinds of treatments and curse-finding spells that turn up empty, they can't find anything.

of course, the silencing threat is still very much up and running. at first shen qingqiu was kind of confused by the whole ordeal, but when the peak lords start describing a "strange blue box", he realizes, with sickening suddenty, that they're describing the system. and he can't say anything.

this only makes everything worse, because their fellow peak lord now keeps evading every question and acts like he doesn't understand. liu qingge points right at his face and asks, "that blue box, what is it?" and shen qingqiu laughs nervously and starts talking about how bright the weather is and surely it's the sky and nothing to worry about!

even worse, during the intervention the system thought it was a good idea to start talking to him, so now even the peak lords who hadn't seen it and who might have been persuaded by light tricks and reflections, get a first row view that no, that definitely isn't a trick of the light.

they try to do the whole thing of "are you in danger, blink twice" but shen qingqiu can't even do that because it's still a direct admittance!

maybe eventually he starts saying vague confirmations that don't actually confirm anything, like "this master hears what you're saying", or maybe he goes with a classic "this master can neither confirm nor deny that." but the system starts warning him for that too and eventually he stops saying anything, which worries the others more.

luckily mu qingfang catches on that every time they ask a direct question about the box or shen qingqiu says anything vaguely confirming, it appears. it doesn't appear when they ask about curses or demons, so it must not see that as a threat.

for a little extra angst: maybe the peak lords keep pressuring him for answers, and at some point shen qingqiu gets fed up and snaps out something like, "why don't you understand that i'm not allowed to answer that!" the system counts this as a direct admittance, threatening it's existence. so it punishes. shen qingqiu has a qi deviation so bad it lasts two weeks and takes two people every day to cleanse his meridians. the system doesn't appear in that time. it doesn't appear for a long while after that, either. the peak lords stop asking, mainly because shen qingqiu will instantly leave the room if they do. they don't stop searching for a cure, though.

shang qinghua returns from a business trip and catches on the second someone mentions a blue box and forced silencing.

[greykolla-art]

Charlie: “I’m so glad my most villain-coded friend is at full power again! 🥰💕”

*throws this to you angst goblins like raw steak* ❤️

(No I will not do a part 2!❤️)

[readwritealldayallnight]

“Since you’re always stealing my water bottle, I got you your own. Look, even got it in your favourite colour!” You announce proudly, setting his new bottle down on the counter.

“S’not my favourite…” he murmurs barely loud enough for you to hear, almost like he doesn’t realize he’s saying it aloud.

“What’s that, Si?”

“Black’s not my favourite colour.” He replies more steadily this time, surprising you with his answer.

“Oh. Really?” You clarify, to which he gives you a single curt nod. “I just thought- I mean everything you wear is black.”

“S’true.” He agrees, tilting his head to one side, as though he’s considering this for the first time himself. “Never really thought ‘bout it, but suppose it was, ‘til recently.”

“Why? What’s your favourite colour now?” You ask, curious to know what changed for him to have a new favourite colour all of a sudden.

Simon comes around closer to where you’re standing, leaning down enough to be face to face, gazing straight into your eyes as he holds a single finger up and points towards your eyes saying:

“Those right there, love. Most beautiful colour there is.”

“Also I’m probably still jus’ gonna drink from your bottle.”

“Simon, NO.”

[doctorsiren]

The books reveal that Ford is actually a secret partier

(Available as a print on my Etsy Shop)

(wips under cut)

[what-am-i-doing-in-this-fandom]

Yeah, I don't know about you, Fidds, but I'd fold at this 🙏

Previous!!

Next!!

First!!

[egophiliac]

doylist explanation for why Gidel is only in Fellow's non-idle lesson animations: probably something about space constraints and making sure two sprites in one seat aren't covering anyone else when they're not in focus

watsonian explanation for why Gidel is only in Fellow's non-idle lesson animations: he snuck in and is hiding from the teachers, don't give him away 🤫

(I've reached my limit of unsuccessful attempts at pulling them before I need to save keys for Halloween, so I've been living vicariously through youtube videos...but the fact that Gidel just pops up from under the desk to wave his arms around happily is really testing my resolve. D: I'm gonna die when they finally get to do alchemy...)