#But I am still lazy so
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Oh right
I keep meaning to do a life update
Because long time followers remember when I posted a lot of personal struggles on here and I like never follow up on that stuff
And have since stopped posting personal stories as often whoops
Honestly I don’t remember everything I left as a loose thread that could be ‘is she okay’ so basically:
>Yes I am okay
>Most the stuff I was having trouble with happened like 5+ years ago now
>I am still pretty shut in, but I have a good job and I do go out once a week technically
>Much more mentally stable, I don’t really get the sort of empty feelings I used to anymore
>Every day I am unsure if I am like 🤖 to other people, or if I live normally. But I have unworked a lot of the emotional repression stuff I was doing subconsciously, and have gained a capacity for the ‘feeling of love’ (since love isn’t really a feeling, but you know the feeling I mean). Idk if I never experienced it before, but if I did it was Extremely rare compared to now. I certainly had devotion, but idk
It’s like ‘oh my prayers were answered on this topic again :0 ‘
I think I am pretty content generally, but I still don’t have happy feelings or fun feelings that often on my own, but this is super normal for me and doesn’t bother me the way the ‘void feelings’ did. It just vibing
>I did get a few extra sensory issues, probably from being shut in, but nothing that makes it any harder to go out. I should go out more still, but not many ideas of where to go for now
>I lost touch with the rest of my rl friends more or less (゚⊿゚) I went through a big thing of making myself not burn bridges and then like 4 months later they stopped contacting me anyways. I haven’t really felt any issue about it so have been leaving it be, but I guess I’ll crack that case back open if it ever starts to feel like a big thing that needs to be done
>My family is doing pretty well : )
>Story stuuffffff. I went through about a year of work to make my to do list better, so now I can focus on writing, sort of. And hopefully I can finish my script for TTF in good time now after the Big Delay of relaying the foundation and needing to get life in order. It will take a Long time because I insist on doing all 10 arcs before starting to draw it, so like... I still am mostly gonna be quiet on the topic for awhile
>Life plans? Nope, never. I still live very in the present, so I will just continue my job till I get fired probably and try my best to keep using my free time well. Or start
>Nobody wonders about this but I swear to you, vitamins/supplements make me sick every time I take them. Like literally sick. Like with germs and things. How????? How???? They had nothing in common between the three diff supplements, but each time I started I would get sick for like 2 weeks or a month ??? But I will keep trying to see if this is actually happening because ??? How ????
>Oh yeah, I am trying to get my health better and actually gained much weight 🥳 maybe someday exercise too, but I wanna tighten daily schedule first
>I am looking at some other mental disorders where I think ‘do I have that???’ But just for the sake of communication. I still don’t really need medication to manage the strange stuff. Coping mechanisms generally work pretty good for me, and learning to weed out bad ones and so on. I haven’t felt ANXIOUS in a bit now, and idk maybe not as often. I know I was like a year or two ago, but it goes down every year overall.
Lots of things that used to make me anxious just don’t so much anymore
That’s everything I can really think of right now
Life is basically good overall for me.
Health is good for me, though I still need to work on actually doing things to be good to my body.
Socializing is pretty good in the forms I do it, but I still need to go out more to prevent my brain from getting weird about ‘sounds and feelings I can’t control’ and all
Fam : )
Everything is chill actually. I basically vent here less now just because I have more opportunity to vent directly to people when there’s a need to wjdnejd but I don’t think anything major comes up that often
But also my emotional memory is really low hwjdnwjd like I know for a fact a year or two ago there was a month where I was super unwell and stressed, but legit idk what that felt like, I just know it happened
So maybe the frequency Could be similar, but I wouldn’t know it 🤔 but certainly less major events happen, and that’s good with me
Just an update cuz I realize it’s easy to vent and all, but when things resolve, it’s less interesting to talk about, so you leave people hanging unintentionally, since posting directly on here barely feels like talking to anyone anyways, super easy to let that go
I am not a private person honestly, so hope this doesn’t seem weird to anyone widjsjdn
#Vio's Personal#Yaaaa boooiiiii#I didn’t mention faith progress stuff because I don’t think I talked a lot about that before :0#But I have been less fearful for a long time now which is bueno#But I am still lazy so#and also my ability to comprehend what I read I have realized is Bad#So need to learn how to study and such#But that will be oookaaaaay probably#My issue is if you show me videos where people explain things#I will find something about the person where I can’t stand them#is how it keeps goimg#but videos are my best format alas#but that’s just a ramble so anyways
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see 0 note flop posts aren't that bad when they're personal but 0 note fandom posts feel literally so bad. like if you don't wanna play toys with me anymore just say that. i'll pack up my super cool awesome things and go and i'll sit on the other side of the playground by myself and i won't even look at you. fuck
#yes i AM thinking about a particular post. no it wasn't that good but still. a moment of heartache for sure#like it feels so bad but im too prou dto delete it and also too lazy
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does anyone have like an anti aesthetic. like something you look at and can recognize as a complete fashion/interior design/artistic movement and understand it but it makes you shudder seeing it. i am not talking like “its morally bad” “its poorly structured” like just sheerly devoid of joy for you actually invites a repulse response.
#also if it wasnt clear this isnt ‘its bad its lazy’ there is a level of like#completion consistancy i am thinking for with this#personally i really do not enjoy the like. vintage chic long red nails fur coats noir esque aesthetic HOWEVER 💥💥💥#i can recognize that it is put together it is Intentional#i feel like a lot of people are going to say minimalism on this so LET ME SAY 🫰☝️ i recognize that minimalism is Considered an aesthetic#but i *PERSONALLY* do not consider it an aesthetic i consider it the void of one#it is a lapse in aesthetic or personality in the same way a silence in a song is still technically a ‘beat’ but no music is played#however the importance of Space or Breath in design is more akin to a purposeful silence in music#because that silence matters in the same way rhythm and breath in design do#so i guess minimalism is more comparable to like. white noise. the sound of a fan#very little effort and there is a comfort in it i suppose but its not. A Design. okay#TO ME 🤫#if minimalism has one hater its me if minimalism has no haters im dead
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Just a heads-up, I'll be gone for the next few weeks to Japan. Been planning this trip with one of my besties (aka the Donnie in my life) to celebrate our 20th friend-iversary. We'll mostly just be eating and soaking in hot springs, but since the two of us are very Leo/Donnie coded it is likely I might post some shorts or photos of our adventures. I'll most likely be MIA until I'm back, but at least I'll have some time to draw and prepare for my return! <3
#I still don't know how they put up with me#I'd really be lost without them#the onsen pictured above is actually one we'll be staying at!#I am very excited to just be lazy and eat#haven't traveled since covid so I've been needing this#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#japan#japan trip#travel#onsen#tmnt#rottmnt leo#rottmnt donnie
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i miss them a little if im gonna be honest
#mp100#mob psycho 100#kageyama shigeo#kageyama ritsu#hanazawa teruki#tome kurata#tsubomi takane#shou suzuki#deliart#i meant for the image to be like. after the end but i also didnt think about the hairstyle changes. sorry......#also i know i was like shou 100% has dwarf hamsters since he got 2 but u know what i dont care. golden hamster stan for life#im planning on getting one i've been checking out breeders near me so i can get a proper healthy one. there are so many good ones here too#i already am thinking on what color im gonna go for..getting picky even. something like offwhite.. silver pearl.. silver dove.. silver mink#jurys still out on wether im gonna get another female or not#i do love how big ladies get and their intense energy and work ethic. truly the most passionate creatures i've ever come across. inspiring.#but a lazy fluffy guy that just sits around and washes his balls all day does seem easier. less likely to climb my curtains.#i got distracted i love hamsters so much. look at my mop drawing now everyone
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just wanted to let you know that i've thought about your masc scout/fem sniper art. it is genderous to me, thank you
Ahhh thank you so much anon!!!🥺I really like them too, they give me a nice change in scenery and a very funny dynamic to play with
#from one sided crush to friends to lovers. or sorta#scout but he likes the stinky girl that pisses in jars because she's tall has crooked glasses and is willing to kill him without hesitation#he is so fucking annoying about her#and she gets pissed at first of course but over time grows to like this funny little guy. this funny dog thing. this funny. guy#team fortress 2#tf2#team fortress 2 fanart#tf2 fanart#tf2 scout#tf2 sniper#speeding bullet#sniperscout#tf2 femsniper#also sorry for sketches being too lazy i am still very very very tired
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Here guys this is my biyearly dedication to the stupid stupid bugcat show. 8 years can you fucking BELIEVE. literally there is nothing to say that I haven’t said before except. Still here. Still brainrotting over this show. It changed my life . Yada Yada. I hope we continue to have just as much fun together as we always have!
#miraculous ladybug#adrien agreste#marinette dupain cheng#chat noir#love square#ladybug#ladynoir#ml season 5#8 years miraculous#this was extremely lazy and that is becaus I am in that cycle of being creative in which making anything is pulling teeth#however I didn’t do one last year so I HAD to make one#I’m still here guys#STILL KICKIN
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and some extra unused stuff while they are in affectionate mood
#the headlap kiss is just a scene on let's talk chu episode 2 that i really like; yuu was offering a massage & massaging his temples with her#thumbs; saying you really should release pressure from this area#i may be lazy to render it fully but i also feel that my sketches deliver the sense of movement better#(and avoiding to make any sense of the anatomy i am confused about)#(like which is going where)#and so because of all the cluster of lines; ur mind will make its own mind which line would make it look right#FUK I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE I POST THIS ALREADY FHSDH I WAS STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO WRITE ON TAGS#twisted wonderland#twst#sebek zigvolt#twst yuu#twst mc#fanart#damn they are finally kissing and they meant it#this makes my chest all hot and bothered#suggestive
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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will
#svsss#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#the fact that people think scum villain#-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me#especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater#heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series#he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters#(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters#like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx#I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes#side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me#i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation#but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years#like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain#the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too#+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu#as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people#another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does#also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be#he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students#and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing#+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this#but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy
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more dom clora and needy seb 😇
🔞🔞!!NSFW!!🔞🔞
[poipiku]
[twitter]
#hes just asking for uhhh help with homework#finally wanted to finish these...ive had them as wips ever since my last sfw dom clora drawings like 2 months ago#so ofc i finish them right before my period BAHAHAH#i was still too lazy to clean them up all the way tho... i am embracing not cleaning up lineart completely now... its much more freeing#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x oc#sebastian sallow x mc#clora clemons#choccyart#sebastian sallow smut
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Here’s my DnD character, Milk Bucket, a human skeleton artificer (battlesmith) whose steel defender is a 4-4-0 Standard Gauge Forney. A steam locomotive engineer cursed into a skeleton and craves for any calcium high foods (like milk).
The best character I have ever made.
Edit: The loco got the wheel configuration updated.
#myart#dnd#dungeons and dragons#their lore is deep and rich and you will never know it because i’m too lazy to write it all#also because there’s so much#so yea#that’s what i’ve been doing this whole time#probably will still stay inactive for a long while (but not dead! i am not abandoning this blog!)#dnd is the best thing that has ever happened to me#all the party members are no joke hella obsessed with this campaign#it’s crazy
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。Anemoia 。
#toilet bound hanako kun#tbhk#jshk#yashiro nene#aoi akane#minamoto teru#hanako kun#jibaku shonen hanako kun#done after chapter 112 if I remember correctly?#tbhk fanart#jshk fanart#my art#already posted on twitter but I still kinda like it yay#there are some errors but I am too lazy to fix rn#I wanna call this arc like this for now bc it sounds cool but ig the official term will be like new timeline arc??#tumblr is so so empty it's insane#honestly if there were more people it would be my 100% place to go#Twitter is toxic af and Instagram is Instagraming (Twitter is bad since X too tbh)#so welp
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sanders sides beach episode when
#YES its april NO i dont care!!!! summer is a state of mind!!!!#i dont actually like summer all that much i am chronically overheated#but l like swimming n stuff#my favorite way of drawing#is just refusing to do lineart#and taking the sketch and just. cleaning it up until its good enough#and using that#bc anytime i do lineart normally i fucking hate it#dont tag this as genderbend#theyr just trans#STILL struggling with my patton design#i also really struggled w logans fit so. ignore how lazy it is#roman sanders#patton sanders#logan sanders#virgil sanders#janus sanders#remus sanders#sanders sides#thomas sanders#sasi#thomas sanders sides#sasi art#sanders sides art#tss fanart#tss#ts sides#art#my art
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forbidden love type of beat
#i'm too lazy to color it in so all you get is this lmao#if you wanna color it in yourself then be my guest just msg me and i'll send you a transparent ver.#splatoon#agent 32#agent 4#agent 8#ah yess my personal agent 32 au that i've only drawn for one other time and will never write fanfic for uwu#I was still a bit sad about splatfest so I just said 'why not draw some good ol yuri' and here I am#my art shit
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russell pixel portrait and some different expressions i drew a few weeks ago for discord emotes
#end roll#russell seager#my art#pixel art#THE END ROLL TAG HAS BEEN TOO DESOLATE I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMOREEE#i was busy playing the new dragon age game for the past two weeks#am done now but am still processing all that for a bit wheeze#HOPING TO GET THE END ROLL ART GOING AGAIN SOON NEVERTHELESS#anyway. did these mainly bc i wanted more russell expressions and figured segawa would not like edits of her sprites considering things#SO I DID MY OWN#the reason i took so long to upload these anywhere (and still haven't bothered for twitter or bsky) is because#pixel art is just. so painfully nerfed visually on social media it barely feels worth it AFKJBBKFJ#is ok here tho so i was also just lazy#i have more variations but i don't wanna drop a whole wall of images#they're 2x size (92 px) btw bc that's the overall most crisp size for discord i tried
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#peircings insp by stunfiskzs dess design that i adore#ahh anyways. waiter waiter mroe fat dess please! i like giving her a chubbier but still strong bodytype#i need to design an outfit for her . but. am lazy.#anyways. this is a pretty basic design i just mushed my favorite desses together but shes fun to draw so.:)#deltarune#dess#my art
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