#Black History Month Free Books

[reasoningdaily]

Online Exhibits

National Museum of African American History and Culture: Afrofuturism: A History of Black FuturesAfrofuturism: A History of Black Futures explores the past, present, and future of this dynamic concept in an exhibition that features the various people, unique themes and radical artistry that have given voice to it. Featuring hundreds of objects and images with several multimedia displays, this exhibition explores the history of Afrofuturist expression and culture through literature, music, art, film, fashion, activism and more.

U.S. National Archives: Black Arts Movement (1965-1975) The Black Arts Movement was a Black nationalism movement that focused on music, literature, drama, and the visual arts made up of Black artists and intellectuals. This was the cultural section of the Black Power movement, in that its participants shared many of the ideologies of Black self-determination, political beliefs, and African American culture. The Black Arts Movement started in 1965 when poet Amiri Baraka [LeRoi Jones] established the Black Arts Repertory Theater in Harlem, New York, as a place for artistic expression. Artists associated with this movement include Audre Lorde, Ntozake Shange, James Baldwin, Gil Scott-Heron, and Thelonious Monk. Records at the National Archives related to the Black Arts Movement primarily focus on individual artists and their interaction with various Federal agencies.

Google Arts & Culture: African American Art: Harlem Renaissance, Civil Rights Era, and Beyond African American Art: Harlem Renaissance, Civil Rights Era and Beyond presents works dating from the early 1920s through the 2000s by Black artists who participated in the multivalent dialogues about art, identity, and the rights of the individual that engaged American society throughout the twentieth century.

National Gallery of Art: Black Art & Artists in Our Collection Explore works from Black artists across centuries, mediums, and geographies, ranging from 19th century still life painter Robert Seldon Duncanson to modern and contemporary pieces by Jacob Lawrence, Romare Bearden, Alma Thomas, Sam Gilliam, Kara Walker, Hank Willis Thomas, and more.

Smithsonian American Art Museum: African American Art SAAM is home to one of the most significant collections of works by African American artists in the world. These artworks span three centuries of creative expression in various media, including painting, sculpture, textiles, and photography, and represent numerous artistic styles, from realism to neoclassicism, abstract expressionism, modernism, and folk art. From a rare group of photographs by early African American studios to an important group of works by self-taught artist Bill Traylor to William H. Johnson’s vibrant portrayals of faith and family, to Mickalene Thomas’s contemporary exploration of Black female identity, the museum’s holdings reflect its long-standing commitment to Black artists and the acquisition, preservation, and display of their work.

NYPL: Schomburg Center for Research in Black Culture, Art and Artifacts Division The Art and Artifacts Division collects, documents, preserves, and interprets art and artifacts by and about peoples of African heritage throughout the world. Fine and applied art and material culture objects from the seventeenth century to the present are collected, with emphasis on the visual arts of the twentieth century in the United States and Africa.

Google Arts & Culture: Beat by Beat This interactive online exhibit was created as a celebration of 50 years of hip hop in collaboration with The Kennedy Center, The Bronx County Historical Society, The Museum at FIT, The National Museum of African American History and Culture, The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, The Baltimore Museum of Art, The Hip Hop Education Center, and HipHop2020 Archive.

Streaming Videos from the MCPHS Libraries

The Amazing Nina Simone She was left out of Civil Rights history, erased by jazz critics, and forgotten by most Americans because no one knew how to categorize her greatness. But throughout the 1960s, Nina Simone was both loved and feared for her outspoken vision of Black Freedom. Her musical proclamations like "Mississippi Goddam", and her iconic style created an alternative voice that continues to empower with its unrelenting appeal for justice. Now, a new documentary reveals the real Nina Simone through over 50 intimate interviews with those who best knew the artistry and intentions of one America's true musical geniuses. With new insights into her journey from Classical Music and the segregated American South, Nina's legacy is chartered all the way to the South of France where she finally found freedom.

JazzJazz has been called the purest expression of American democracy; a music built on individualism and compromise, independence and cooperation. Ken Burns follows the growth and development of jazz music from the gritty streets of New Orleans to Chicago's south side, the speakeasies of Kansas city and to Times Square.

Jean-Michel Basquiat: The Radiant Child Director Tamra Davis pays homage to her friend in this definitive documentary but also delves into Basquiat as an iconoclast. His dense, bebop-influenced neoexpressionist work emerged while minimalist, conceptual art was the fad; as a successful Black artist, he was constantly confronted by racism and misconceptions. Much can be gleaned from insider interviews and archival footage, but it is Basquiat's own words and work that powerfully convey the mystique and allure of both the artist and the man.

Videos to Check Out from Your Local Library

Summer of Soul (...or When the Revolution Could Not Be Televised) In his acclaimed debut as a filmmaker, Ahmir "Questlove" Thompson presents a powerful and transporting documentary, part music film, part historical record, created around an epic event that celebrated Black history, culture, and fashion. Over the course of six weeks in the summer of 1969, just one hundred miles south of Woodstock, The Harlem Cultural Festival was filmed in Mount Morris Park (now Marcus Garvey Park). The footage was largely forgotten, until now. This documentary shines a light on the importance of history to our spiritual well-being and stands as a testament to the healing power of music during times of unrest, both past, and present. The feature includes concert performances by Stevie Wonder, Nina Simone, Sly & the Family Stone, Gladys Knight and the Pips, Mahalia Jackson, B.B. King, The 5th Dimension, and more.

Through a Lens Darkly: Black Photographers and the Emergence of a People The first documentary to explore the role of photography in shaping the identity, aspirations and social emergence of African Americans from slavery to the present, Through a Lens Darkly probes the recesses of American history by discovering images that have been suppressed, forgotten and lost. Bringing to light the hidden and unknown photos shot by both professional and vernacular African American photographers, the film opens a window into lives, experiences and perspectives of Black families that is absent from the traditional historical canon. These images show a much more complex and nuanced view of American culture and society and its founding ideals. Inspired by Deborah Willis's book Reflections in Black and featuring the works of Carrie Mae Weems, Lorna Simpson, Anthony Barboza, Hank Willis Thomas, Coco Fusco, Clarissa Sligh and many others, Through a Lens Darkly introduces the viewer to a diverse yet focused community of storytellers who transform singular experiences into a communal journey of discovery – and a call to action.

Black Art: In the Absence of Light At the heart of this feature documentary is the groundbreaking "Two Centuries of Black American Art" exhibition curated by the late African American artist and scholar David Driskell in 1976. Held at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art, this pioneering exhibit featured more than 200 works of art by 63 artists and cemented the essential contributions of Black artists in America in the 19th and 20th centuries. The exhibit would eventually travel to the Dallas Museum of Fine Arts, the High Museum of Art in Atlanta, and the Brooklyn Museum. The film shines a light on the exhibition's extraordinary impact on generations of African American artists who have staked a claim on their rightful place within the 21st-century art world.

[thottyoptimusprime]

Haymarket Books is giving out free Black history books in response to the book bans!

They also started a program in Florida to give free books on black history to teachers, activist, etc.

Also feel free to donate to their program to give books to people in prison.

[nellasbookplanet]

Book recs: black science fiction

As february and black history month nears its end, if you're a reader let's not forget to read and appreciate books by black authors the rest of the year as well! If you're a sci-fi fan like me, perhaps this list can help find some good books to sink your teeth into.

Bleak dystopias, high tech space adventures, alien monsters, alternate dimensions, mash-ups of sci-fi and fantasy - this list features a little bit of everything for genre fiction fans!

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!

If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!

Lagoon by Nnedi Okorafor

Something massive and alien crashes into the ocean off the coast of Nigeria. Three people, a marine biologist, a rapper, and a soldier, find themselves at the center of this presence, attempting to shepherd an alien ambassador as chaos spreads in the city. A strange novel that mixes the supernatural with the alien, shifts between many different POVs, and gives a one of a kind look at a possible first contact.

Nubia: The Awakening (Nubia series) by Omar Epps & Clarence A. Hayes

Young adult. Three teens living in the slums of an enviromentally ravaged New York find that something powerful is awakening within them. They’re all children of refugees of Nubia, a utopian African island nation that sank as the climate worsened, and realize now that their parents have been hiding aspects of their heritage from them. But as they come into their own, someone seeks to use their abilities to his own ends, against their own people.

The Scourge Between Stars by Ness Brown

Novella. After having failed at establishing a new colony, starship Calypso fights to make it back to Earth. Acting captain Jacklyn Albright is already struggling against the threats of interstellar space and impending starvation when the ship throws her a new danger: something is hiding on the ship, picking off her crew one by one in bloody, gruesome ways. A quick, excellent read if you want some good Alien vibes.

Dawn (Xenogenesis trilogy) by Octavia E. Butler*

After a devestating war leaves humanity on the brink of extinction, survivor Lilith finds herself waking up naked and alone in a strange room. She’s been rescued by the Oankali, who have arrived just in time to save the human race. But there’s a price to survival, and it might be humanity itself. Absolutely fucked up I love it I once had to drop the book mid read to stare at the ceiling and exclaim in horror at what was going on. Includes darker examinations of agency and consent, so enter with caution.

Midnight Robber by Nalo Hopkinson*

Utterly unique in world-building, story, and prose, Midnight Robber follows young Tan-Tan and her father, inhabitants of the Carribean-colonized planet of Toussaint. When her father commits a terrible crime, he’s exiled to a parallel version of the same planet, home to strange aliens and other human exiles. Tan-Tan, not wanting to lose her father, follows with him. Trapped on this new planet, he becomes her worst nightmare. Enter this book with caution, as it contains graphic child sexual abuse.

Rosewater (The Wormwood trilogy) by Tade Thompson

In Nigeria lies Rosewater, a city bordering on a strange, alien biodome. Its motives are unknown, but it’s having an undeniable effect on the surrounding life. Kaaro, former criminal and current psychic agent for the government, is one of the people changed by it. When other psychics like him begin getting killed, Kaaro must take it upon himself to find out the truth about the biodome and its intentions.

Do You Dream of Terra-Two? by Temi Oh

Young adult. A century ago, an astronomer discovered a possibly Earth-like planet. Now, a team of veteran astronauts and carefully chosen teenagers are preparing to embark on a twenty-three year trip to get there. But space is dangerous, and the team has no one to rely on but each other if - or when - something goes wrong. An introspective slowburn of a story, this focuses more on character work than action.

The Best of All Possible Worlds by Karen Lord

After the planet Sadira is left uninhabitable, its few survivors are forced to move to a new world. On Cygnus Beta, they work to rebuild their society alongside their distant relatives of the planet, while trying to preserve what remains of their culture. Focused less on hard science or action, The Best of All Possible Worlds is more about culture, romance and the ethics and practicalities of telepathy.

Mirage (Mirage duology) by Somaiya Daud

Young adult. Eighteen-year-old Amani lives on an isolated moon under the oppressive occupation of the Valthek empire. When Amani is abducted, she finds herself someplace wholly unexpected: the royal palace. As it turns out, she's nearly identical to the half-Valthek, and widely hated, princess Maram, who is in need of a body double. If Amani ever wants to make it back home or see her people freed from oppression, she will have to play her role as princess perfectly. While sci-fi, this one more has the vibe of a fantasy.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon

Life on the lower decks of the generation ship HSS Matilda is hard for Aster, an outcast even among outcasts, trying to survive in a system not dissimilar to the old antebellum South. The ship’s leaders have imposed harsh restrictions on their darker skinned people, using them as an oppressed work force as they travel toward their supposed Promised Land. But as Aster finds a link between the death of the ship’s sovereign and the suicide of her own mother, she realizes there may be a way off the ship.

Where It Rains in Color by Denise Crittendon

The planet Swazembi is a utopia of color and beauty, the most beautiful of all its citizens being the Rare Indigo. Lileala was just named Rare Indigo, but her strict yet pampered life gets upended when her beautiful skin is struck by a mysterious sickness, leaving it covered in scars and scabs. Meanwhile, voices start to whisper in Lileala's mind, bringing to the surface a past long forgotten involving her entire society.

Eacaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus duology) by Nicky Drayden

Seske is the heir to the leader of a clan living inside a gigantic, spacefaring beast, of which they frequently need to catch a new one to reside in as their presence slowly kills the beast from the inside. While I found the ending rushed with regards to plot and character, the worldbuilding is very fresh and the overall plot of survival and class struggle an interesting one. It’s also sapphic!

Chain-Gang All-Stars by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah*

In a near future America, inmates on death row or with life sentences in private prisons can choose to participate in death matches for entertainment. If they survive long enough - a rare case indeed - they regain their freedom. Among these prisoners are Loretta Thurwar and Hamara "Hurricane Staxxx" Stacker, partners behind the scenes and close to the deadline of a possible release - if only they can survive for long enough. As the game continues to be stacked against them and protests mount outside, two women fight for love, freedom, and their own humanity. Chain-Gang All-Stars is bleak and unflinching as well as genuinely hopeful in its portrayal of a dark but all to real possible future.

Parable of the Sower (Earthseed duology) by Octavia E. Butler*

In a bleak future, Lauren Olamina lives with her family in a gated community, one of few still safe places in a time of chaos. When her community falls, Lauren is forced on the run. As she makes her way toward possible safety, she picks up a following of other refugees, and sows the seeds of a new ideology which may one day be the saviour of mankind. Very bleak and scarily realistic, Parable of the Sower will make you both fear for mankind and regain your hope for humanity.

Binti (Binti trilogy) by Nnedi Okorafor

Young adult novella. Binti is the first of the Himba people to be accepted into the prestigious Oomza University, the finest place of higher learning in all the galaxy. But as she embarks on her interstellar journey, the unthinkable happens: her ship is attacked by the terrifying Meduse, an alien race at war with Oomza University.

War Girls (War Girls duology) by Tochi Onyebuchi

In an enviromentally fraught future, the Nigerian civil war has flared back up, utilizing cybernetics and mechs to enhance its soldiers. Two sisters, by bond if not by blood, are separated and end up on differing sides of the struggle. Brutal and dark, with themes of dehumanization of soldiers through cybernetics that turn them into weapons, and the effect and trauma this has on them.

The Space Between Worlds (The Space Between Worlds duology) by Micaiah Johnson

Multiverse travel is finally possible, but there’s a catch: No one can visit a world where their counterpart is still alive. Enter Cara, whose parallel selves happen to be exceptionally good at dying. As such she has a very special job in traveling to these worlds, hoping to keep her position long enough to gain citizenship in the walled-off Wiley City, away from the wastes where she grew up. But her job is dangerous, especially when she gets on the tracks of a secret that threatens the entire multiverse. Really cool worldbuilding and characters, also featuring a sapphic lead!

The Fifth Season (The Broken Eart trilogy) by N.K. Jemisin*

In a world regularly torn apart by natural disasters, a big one finally strikes and society as we know it falls, leaving people floundering to survive in a post apocalyptic world, its secrets and past to be slowly revealed. We get to follow a mother as she races through this world to find and save her missing daughter. While mostly fantasy in genre, this series does have some sci-fi flavor, and is genuinely some of the best books I've ever read, please read them.

The Women Could Fly by Megan Giddings*

In an alternate version of our present, the witch hunt never ended. Women are constantly watched and expected to marry young so their husbands can keep an eye on them. When she was fourteen, Josephine's mother disappeared, leveling suspicions at both mother and daughter of possible witchcraft. Now, nearly a decade and a half later, Jo, in trying to finally accept her missing mother as dead, decides to follow up on a set of seemingly nonsensical instructions left in her will. Features a bisexual lead!

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden

South African-set scifi featuring gods ancient and new, robots finding sentience, dik-diks, and a gay teen with mind control abilities. An ancient goddess seeks to return to her true power no matter how many humans she has to sacrifice to get there. A little bit all over the place but very creative and fresh.

The Summer Prince by Alaya Dawn Johnson*

Young adult. Young artist June Costa lives in Palmares Tres, a beautiful, matriarchal city relying heavily on tradition, one of which is the Summer King. The most recent Summer King is Enki, a bold boy and fellow artist. With him at her side, June seeks to finally find fame and recognition through her art, breaking through the generational divide of her home. But growing close to Enki is dangerous, because he, like all Summer Kings, is destined to die.

The Blood Trials (The Blood Gifted duology) by N.E. Davenport

After Ikenna's grandfather is assasinated, she is convinced that only a member of the Praetorian guard, elite soldiers, could’ve killed him. Seeking to uncover his killer, Ikenna enrolls in a dangerous trial to join the Praetorians which only a quarter of applicants survive. For Ikenna, the stakes are even higher, as she's hiding forbidden blood magic which could cost her her life. Mix of fantasy and sci-fi. While I didn’t super vibe with this one, I suspect fans of action packed romantasy will enjoy it.

Babel-17 by Samuel R. Delany

1960s classic. Rydra Wong is a space captain, linguist and poet who is set on learning to understand Babel-17, a language which is humanity's only clue at the enemy in an interstaller war. But Babel-17 is more than just a language, and studying it may change Rydra forever.

Pet (Pet duology) by Akwaeke Emezi

Young adult novella. Jam lives in a utopian future that has been freed of monsters and the systems which created and upheld them. But then she meets Pet, a dangerous creature claiming to be hunting a monster still among them, prepared to stop at nothing to find them. While I personally found the word-building in Pet lacking, it deftly handles dark subjects of what makes a human a monster.

Bonus AKA I haven’t read these yet but they seem really cool

Lion's Blood by Steven Barnes

Alternate history in which Africans colonized South America while vikings colonized the North. The vikings sell abducted Celts and Franks as slaves to the South, one of which is eleven-years-old Irish boy Aidan O'Dere, who was just bought by a Southern plantation owner.

The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow

Young adult dystopia. Ellie lives in a future where humanity is under the control of the alien Ilori. All art is forbidden, but Ellie keeps a secret library; when one of her books disappears, she fears discovery and execution. M0Rr1S, born in a lab and raised to be emotionless, finds her library, and though he should deliver her for execution, he finds himself obsessed with human music. Together the two embark on a roadtrip which may save humanity.

Womb City by Tlotlo Tsamaase

Lelah lives in future Botswana, but despite money and fame she finds herself in an unhappy marriage, her body controlled via microchip by her husband. After burying the body of an accidental hit and run, Lelah's life gets worse when the ghost of her victim returns to enact bloody vengeance.

Orleans by Sherri L. Smith

Young adult. Fen de la Guerre, living in a quarantined Gulf Coast left devestated by storms and sickness, is forced on the run with a newborn after her tribe is attacked. Hoping to get the child to safety, Fen seeks to get to the other side of the wall, she teams up with a scientist from the outside the quarantine zone.

Everfair by Nisi Shawl

A neo-victorian alternate history, in which a part of Congo was kept safe from colonisation, becoming Everfair, a safe haven for both the people of Congo and former slaves returning from America. Here they must struggle to keep this home safe for them all.

The Splinter in the Sky by Kemi Ashing-Giwa

Space opera. Enitan just wants to live a quiet life in the aftermath of a failed war of conquest, but when her lover is killed and her sister kidnapped, she's forced to leave her plans behind to save her sister.

Honorary mentions AKA these didn't really work for me but maybe you guys will like them: The City We Became (Great Cities duology) by N.K. Jemisin, The Lesson by Cadwell Turnbull, The A.I. Who Loved Me by Alyssa Cole

[cashawselena]

[readyforevolution]

By Nichii Nahama

‘Soooo you mean to tell me that someone down your ancestry line survived being chained to other human bodies for several months in the bottom of a disease-infested ship during the Middle Passage, lost their language, customs and traditions, picked up the English language as best they could while working free of charge from sun up to sun down as they watched babies sold from out of their arms and women raped by ruthless slave owners.

Took names with no last names, no birth certificates, no heritage of any kind, braved the Underground Railroad, survived the Civil War to enter into sharecropping... Learned to read and write out of sheer will and determination, faced the burning crosses of the KKK, everted their eyes at the black bodies swinging from ropes hung on trees...

Fought in World Wars as soldiers only to return to America as boys, marched in Birmingham, hosed in Selma, jailed in Wilmington, assassinated in Memphis, segregated in the South, ghettoed in the North, ignored in history books, stereotyped in Hollywood...

and in spite of it all, someone in your family line endured every era to make sure you would get here, but you receive one rejection, face one obstacle, lose one friend, get overlooked, and you want to quit?

How dare you entertain the very thought of quitting. People, you will never know survived from generation to generation so you could succeed. Don’t you dare let them down!

It is NOT in our DNA to quit!’

[hermetiqa]

When will you meet your future spouse?

Reminder: it doesn't matter if you saw this reading a day or a week or a month or a year after posting this. My readings are timeless. You'll see this when you're meant to see this and receive your message.

Close your eyes and take a deep breath before picking a pile. If you feel drawn to more than one pile, it's alright, you may take the piles that you're drawn to. What's important is to take it how it resonates and leave what doesn't.

PAID READINGS | TIP JAR | FEEDBACK

MASTERLIST | PLEASE HELP IF YOU CAN

NOTE: Please feel free to give me a feedback on my asks about the reading! I would highly appreciate it and it'll be a huge help for me to improve as a reader.

Pile 1

Hello, Pile 1! I feel like you'll meet your future spouse when you prefer to be alone and be away from all the people you already know. You might think of going to some camp alone and when you're getting together in the camp, you might have come up with the idea of using a different name when you introduce yourself because you intend not to share who you truly are. You might think of the names Ella, Lily, Alisha, Cindy, Helena. The spelling of the names doesn't matter, any alternative spellings or name variations could be in your mind too. You might even use an odd name, like a name known to be masculine such as Alex and George. There's a TikToker who keeps popping in my head right now, the one who has a Chloe Paddington bags and named her bags. You might have had this camp and name idea from her. I can see that your future spouse might be the one who would approach you first and start the conversation, and they really have a strong masculine energy here while you're the feminine one. I'm also getting an intuitive energy from you and you might have a feeling that you feel like you've known each other for a long time, even if it was really your first time meeting each other. You might be a fire sign and they could be a water sign, but you're quite compatible. It seems like you could have each other's sun in one's moon and/or ascendant.

Signs: dark/black hair, curly hair, brown eyes, dark/light academia fashion style, white loose button-down shirt, latino/a looks, speaks spanish and italian, campfire, marshmallows, trees, beach, seashore, lowtide, collecting seashells

Pile 2

Hello, Pile 2! As for you, I'm seeing a picnic that involves books and paintings. 01:01 on the clock right now. You might think of reading a book or doing a painting, specifically watercolor or oil painting, in the afternoon. You might do this alone in a park or somewhere that has a pond. To be more detailed, I'm getting that you might read a book in a park and would prefer to paint some place that has a pond with koi fish or water lilies so you can paint them. I'm getting the seasons spring and summer too. You could be an introvert and you often go to your comfort places to breathe and rewind. And your future spouse would notice you visiting the same place oftentimes. They could observe you for a while before approaching you as well. And I feel like they might ask you if they could join you to read a book or paint something. You might even exchange books and paintings. You might annotate each other's books and paint each other's paintings (you know the thing where you both paint something on your canvas and you exchange each other's unfinished paintings and add something, and so on).

Signs: dark/brunette hair, curly hair, blue eyes, strong jawline, downtown/retro fashion, long white skirts, baggy shirts, leather bag, doc martens, the secret history, if we were villains, ophelia, the lumineers, (curtain) bangs, wavy hair, booktok

Pile 3

Hello, Pile 3! I feel like you'll meet yours when you're doing some charity event or donating something. It could be related to dogs and/or cats, so you could be pet lovers. This might be an all-of-a-sudden decision because the charity/donation wasn't planned that much but I'm getting that you might meet there. You might organize the charity or help them organize and they'll help too, and you might do most of the work together. I'm also getting that this is when you're trying to become a better person and finally end your toxic habits. I feel like you have feminine energy but to other people, you show your masculine energy. You might think of getting something to eat together at lunch when you work together after a charity event, and this is when you'll start to know each other. You'll be interested in each other's interests and might think that you're compatible, and might suit each other. You'll be really fond of each other for a while which will lead you to some dates and hanging out a lot. I feel like you'll both reciprocate each other's wants and needs in this connection, especially with all the adjustments at first, but you'll be close friends even while you're dating, you might be comfortable to be around each other as if you're best friends.

Signs: blonde, blue/green eyes, wavy hair, daisies/flowers on hair, blue shorts, white and blue shirt, band shirts, casual fashion, flexible, gymnastics and ballet (during childhood), waffles, hotdogs, pizzas, medium hair length, straight hair, brown hair highlights, summer

[adventures-in-mangaland]

Dead Boy Detectives Fic Recs Part 7

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6

So I hear there's been some fandom drama? Guess it's time for another fic rec list! This fandom is so lovely, so let's focus on the positive and give all the love to our writers and artists. You guys are so talented. ♥️

Work It Harder, Make it Better by dear_monday, two_ravens

Olympics AU! And kind of Sk8er Boi? Charles is an Olympic skateboarder at the end of his competitive career and Edwin is a rising star in the world of dressage. They fall in love at Paris 2024. Amazing writing, as always, and I also enjoyed Niko and Crystal as members of the skateboarding and equestrian teams having their own Olympics Romance and Jenny as Charles' world-weary coach.

Twin Flame by Leandra

Another "He was a punk, he did ballet" romance! This time, everyone is alive and the boys meet when Charles watches Edwin perform at his little sister's ballet recital. The romance and Charles as a big brother are very sweet, which is great as this fic also covers some heavy themes. It's set in the 90s so there's discussion of homophobia, the AIDs crisis and Charles' canon child abuse. Suffice to say, his bisexual awakening is quite fraught. Recommended!

Love for Hire by lucrow

Edwin hires Charles to freak out his parents with his obnoxious fake boyfriend. What could possible haaappeeen? And yes, it's a ballet/punk romance too. 😅 Anyway, it's giving fantastic banter, lots of emotions and great use of trope! I also enjoyed Edwin's relationship with his mum in this fic, excellent parental feels.

so I try to talk refined by shadowquill17

Charles finds out about the Cat King taking on his appearance and (somehow) arrives at the conclusion that Edwin isn't attracted to him. Charles having body image as well as chronic self-esteem issues was interesting but kind of heartbreaking. Read it for Edwin's agonised attempts to verbalise his sexual attraction to Charles without exploding. That's love right there.

A Royal Pain(e) (series) by handwrittenhello

Royalty AU! I love a bodyguard romance from time to time and this one is lovely. Lots of yearning.

Turnabout's Fair Play by LikeMmmCookies

Edwin enlists Niko and Crystal to teach him how to flirt with Charles. It starts off cute and awkward and ends up Master Of All He Surveys, which is very Edwin.

I will love you (I really love you) by ghostinthelibrary

Charles has a feelings realization and tries to confess to Edwin. Repeatedly. From a cock-blocking enchanted statue to a Hellhound, it's farcical and fun. This fic has been living in my head rent free for months.

seasons of mists by laiqualaurelote

Edwin hires Charles to be the barista in his book shop's cafe. Two cosy AUs in one! And it even comes (appropriately) with its own reading list and fanart! Very cute, excellent autumnal vibes and a superb imaginary book shop. I'm genuinely so devastated it's not a real place. 😭

Ariadne's Thread by hobbitsdoitbetter

In which Edwin is demisexual and trying to make it work with Charles. Love to see some ace spectrum representation!

you know the problem with history (it keeps coming back like weeds) by aletterinthenameofsanity

Amnesia AU! And kind of Secret Relationship? Edwin has Not So Temporary Amnesia that made him forget a whole romantic relationship with Charles early in their partnership. And Charles never told him... Surely this will have no impact on the events of canon?? 😬 I loved this twist on the trope!

scraped to the marrow by Anonymous

Edwin learned black magic in Hell and kind of went to the Dark Side. I love the trope of "Everyone thinks Character avoids violence because they're scared/weak/nice/bad at it, but actually they're a bit too good at it" and this fic does it well. I love regular Edwin, but Lord Bone was also pretty cool.

To Walk Back Into Hell by Asidian

Charles goes to Hell in Edwin's place, so naturally Edwin needs to find a way to rescue him! Interesting Hell lore and I loved all the Charles love in this.

It does not stop by williamvapespeare

Now he's safe from Hell, Edwin finally works through his PTSD. Emotional, but peak Emotional Support Charles for the win!

signed, sealed, delivered by sulfuric

Outsider PoV of the boys and the agency through the years from the perspective of the Ghost Postman. He's kind of underrated as a side character, but there are so many Implications about the Dead Letter Office, so I enjoyed the worldbuilding. And the supernatural community of London gossiping about/shipping the boys (they're just like us, for real). Love that trope.

not so secret by lola_prongs

Social Media/Celebrity AU! In which they're both actors and Charles relentlessly thirsts after Edwin on Twitter. Great use of social media/epistolary storytelling.

Like a record, baby by singtome

Another celebrity/social media AU, but this time Charles and Crystal are budding rock stars and Edwin is their manager. Also Edwin goes viral as the mysterious #HotGuyatUnity after his picture's taken at an event and Charles *tries* to set the record straight. This one's funny, generous with the yearning and UST and is part of a series that also touches on the darker side of the music industry/celebrity, which I appreciated. And it also has this excellent visual representation of the online drama.

@ghostinthelibrarywrites @tumblerislovetumblerislife @shadowquill17 @neurodivergent-fangirling @whatthehorsedoicallthisblog @shazziez @many-gay-magpies @extremely-eager-reader @atariakana @guardianspirits13 @colourmornings @herebehunters @avoiceofnerat @littlepocketuniverse @overlord-of-chaos @fairandfatalasfair @handwrittenhello @every-moment-a-different-sound @williamvapespeare @laiqualaurelote @dear-monday @dear-lucrow @aletterinthenameofsanity @likemmmcookies @bibliomancer7 @c-rowland @nobledragonflying @hobbitsdoitbetter

I've tagged some people again. Let me know if you'd like to be added to the tag list!

[aroaessidhe]

I don't post much about nonfiction on here, but considering the strike this week I thought I'd share some of the books I've read on Palestine/Gaza in the last couple months. I got these for free from haymarket books & verso books (or my library). I recommend picking up some if not all of these.

The Hundred Years War on Palestine & The Ethnic Cleansing of Palestine go into the last 100 years of Palestine's history and occupation

Ten Myths About Israel gives a bit of an more brief overview centred around Israeli propaganda

A Socialist Revolution and BDS go into history & freedom/rights movements & institutional boycotts, in Palestine and globally

Freedom Is A Constant Struggle connects Palestinian liberation movements with Ferguson and Black liberation in the US

They Called Me A Lioness is about the experiences of Palestinians in the West Bank, and a teen girls' 8 month imprisonment

Light In Gaza is various essays on different elements of oppression, resistance, and life in Gaza

The Palestine Laboratory is about Israel's military tech being developed & tested on Palestinians and how it's used all around the world.

Palestinian Walks: Forays Into a Vanishing Landscape: about how the occupation has changed the land over time and the effects of this

[wasitforrevenge]

new romantics

pairing: MODERN AU!college azriel x female reader

warnings: may be some triggering content including tampon is a douchbag at a party, mentions of drugs and alcohol, mentions of sexual activity but nothing major, smut books mentioned (hehehe) a fight occurs but can you blame him? he’s just defending your honor ugh, two idiots in love who want nothing but each other and can’t admit it, no use of y/n, imagine her as you, because it is YOU! half editted… ill get to it later i promise

word count: 4.5k

summary: your new study partner is better than you first realize… and now you can’t stop thinking about him, but he can’t stop thinking of you either.

authors note: hi first time writing for acotor! been a fan of these books for a while and my baby azriel does something to me!!! so here’s something i spent the night writing it was 10 different things before it was this lol! pls like, reblog and comment! thank you everyone for reading! photo credit to pinterest, and please i strive to do better so any thoughts pls free feel to let me know! thank you for the support! this is the first time i’ve had the energy to write in months so pls dont go too hard

you met azriel in a greek mythology lecture that you both ended up in during the second semester of your sophomore year. getting partnered with an incredibly built and handsome man for a history report your teacher assigned was the least of your problems when you realized how fucking kind and beautiful azriel is on the inside and out.

the real problem came when you realized how hard you were falling for this man when you started hanging out casually, hitting the coffee stand before class or getting food after a long day. you learned so much about him in a matter of months and couldn’t get him out of your head.

you never spoke existence to your feelings for him, mainly because you didn’t want to ruin a very good potential friendship but partly because you didn’t think you were good enough for someone like him. you’ve heard little whispers about his other… activities and you couldn’t help the way it made you feel.

at the start of your junior year, you and azriel were practically best friends and it just felt so natural. the way you two were together. the way your conversations flowed and the way the silence was never deafening when you were together. you spent time cuddling on the couch in your living room watching movies and rating tv shows and going to visit parks around town and getting high as fuck. once time you had even gone crazy and took some acid and spent hours at the aquarium watching all the fish. you studied for classes together, the one you shared and the ones you both took on your own.

you and azriel were always testing out new recipes in his large kitchen. its wonderful that he lives alone. alone as in by himself but you cannot glance over the fact that the rhysand and feyre along with cassian and nesta live on the same floor of this apartment building close to campus. you luckly only live 2 floors down, a thing you realized when you managed to see him in the elevator about a week or two after you first started studying together.

you were debating all summer about confessing your feelings to him but could not gather the courage to bring yourself to admit it to him and face rejection. you couldn’t mess up the relationship between you already. he was your best friend and you really didn’t have too many besides him. you’ve met his family and have spend a lot of time with them, they’re all practically adopted you at the point, they welcomed you with smiles and open arms (besides amren but they told you she’s always like that.)

but a couple weeks into the semester, you and nesta were standing in a kitchen of a person you don’t know debating on what shitty cheap alcohol you’ll be indulging in tonight. it was the first big back to school party and it was still hot as hell out so you were dressed in dark denim shorts and nice tank top along with your black converse.

you and nesta instantly clicked when you met. bonding over smutty books and all the tv shows you managed to watch. she’s felt like your first real girl-friend ever, you guys got some comfortable together and every time you guys hung out, it felt like no time had passed. it was refreshing to have someone to talk to. she also happens to be the only one who knows about the feelings you harbor for your other best friend.

as you’re about to pour the tequila into your red solo cup, you hear someone call nesta’s name and she tells you she’ll be right back before scurrying off to whichever of her friends was calling her. leaving you there alone not knowing anyone at the party, nesta told you the rest of the group was going to meet you there but you have yet to see any of them as you turn your head around the room.

as you fill your cup and turn to put the bottle back down on the counter, you feel a hand glide around your waist and are suddenly aware of a man extremely too close your liking. “hey baby” he said as he slurred his words, clearly intoxicated, by the way he looked and smelled. it sent more warnings through your head even after he grabbed you like that. you had to leave, this couldn’t happen. thoughts are rushing through your head. you move your hand to push his arm off you as you turn around to be face to face with a tall blonde with long hair.

“what was that for?” he drags out as he tried to put his hand back on you. you instantly tried to move towards the way nesta went and told him, “please get off!” but he was too fast and held your upper arm in a death grip before he tugged you closer to his chest, his other hand back on your waist like the first time he did it. your eyes close in fear as he leans down to whisper something in your ear, but he’s gone in an instant.

it all happened so fast. all you see is a large, muscular, tattooed arm flying in front of you, hitting the man who was on you just seconds ago. you watched shocked as you finally lock in to the situation before you.

azriel beating the shit out of the man who had just laid his hands on you.

azriel swung his fist again towards him, hitting him square in the jaw, “what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” he screamed at him, having another punch already landing with his other fist.

the man doesn’t respond before he swings back at azriel and managed to get a decent swing in, the hit landed to his lip but azriel doesn’t move at all. he’s standing still in the spot, continuing to tower over him.

azriel shoved the man back into the counter and landed a powerful hook right to his nose simultaneously. he cried out as it made contact, “fuck dude c’mon,” he reached up to grab it, blood pouring from his broken nose and busted lip. he steps closer as he removes his hand looking at the red liquid that has held onto his skin, ready to defend himself against the beautiful man that your eyes cannot stray from.

but azriel is faster and before he could even blink, managed to grab a hold of his shirt and pull him up to where his toes barely touched the floor. his hands fall at his sides and his eyes widen in fear as azriel gets closer to his face, leaning down to whisper something in his ear that you can’t hear over the loud music, people partying and the screaming and crying in your heart as you watched this all unfold.

suddenly azriel is tossing the man back into the counter and he barely managed to grab it and hold on, azriel suddenly grows larger, as if he could get any bigger, and leans to spit out the blood that had collected in his mouth behind him. and suddenly your attention is focused on the warmth now englufing your wrist. your eyes immediately register the sight of him standing in front of you, this was warm and right, his hands on you. it just felt so right.

his other hand reached out and gently lifts your chin to meet his gaze. the way the sense of safety coursed through you with his simple touch just confirmed, yet again, that this was going to be so hard for you to tell him.

“hey baby…” he spoke softly, his eyes darted between both yours. his attention solely on you. he let his finger rub against your cheek as he finished, “are you okay?” you can’t help the feeling the shoots through you at the use of the pet name and the look of shock that painted your face. not knowing if it came from, whether it was from what unfolded in front of you at this party or the fact he still holding your face and talking to you like this, so sweetly.

you blinked a couple times and the realization hit you that you’ve just been standing there, staring into his beautiful eyes. not paying attention to the group of people that crowded around as the fight was happening or the looks you guys are getting from other party goers that still surrounded you. the only thing you can stand to focus on his gaze.

azriel.

“i don’t know,” you almost whisper towards him, feeling his warmth covering you both. before you can talk again, he moves his scarred hand from your wrist, you feel almost… empty at the loss of contact but that doesn’t last long as he slipped his hand into yours and intertwined his fingers with yours as he guided you towards the front door.

you passed by so many people, you tried not to pay attention to all the looks you were getting. girls stared as they realized it wasn’t themselves in azriel’s grasp, but you. it was your hand he was holding. your heart beat at just the thought of it, your nerves were already shot as the events unfolded not even 10 minutes ago and this did not help one bit.

your eyes manage to catch nesta’s in the crowd, her eyes widen as she takes in the sight before her, azriel holding your hand and leading you out of the party. oblivious to what actually happened to cause this, she gave you a huge smile and two thumbs up. you cant help but silently chuckle at your friend despite the other overwhelming feelings you have. you’ll explain the situation later when you text her but you were sure eventually she’d hear what happened.

he leads you out the front door and looks back at you with a small smile as you trail behind him. he walked you over, without a word and hands still intertwined and you finally notice your next to his old beat up mustang on the side of the street, the one that smells like him and the faint smell of weed that always lingers regardless of the last time he smoked in there.

he opened the car door for you and you released your hand from his and got into the passengers seat. once you were in, he reached over and buckled your seatbelt for you, giving it a tug to make sure it was connected before smiling down at you from outside the car. he shut the door satisfied and walked around the back of the car to open his own door and sat inside.

the silence is comfortable. it always has been, you pray that sometimes it’s awkward or uncomfortable but it never is. you sit in your seat, eyes staring down towards the hand he had been holding, almost in disbelief, that he defended you like that. you’ve never seen azriel angry like that either. he turns to face you, wanting you to meet his eyes.

azriel walked in the front door of the party, after having a pretty day. the customers at the restaurant he works truly sucked today. small tips and even shittier people. all he wanted to do was smoke off some steam and get drunk with cassian and rhys. he knew you were going to be here. cassian mentioned it in passing while talking about nesta so he was also on the look out for you. the girl who managed to catch his heart after having been partnered together. azriel couldn’t help the way he felt about you even though it almost felt wrong to him.

he didn’t want to take advantage of you, he knew you were shy and never really been in a relationship. he found that out when he walked into the kitchen of cassian and nesta’s apartment, and overheard nesta telling cass all about you after her and you hung out for the first time outside the group. so he just tried to ignore his feelings but regardless of that fact you were his bestfriend. he just couldn’t escape you.

and when he walked into that kitchen to see tamlin standing over you, your arm tight in his grip, the way your eyes were slammed shut trying to back away from him. he didn’t even think. he was there pulling him off you before he could even recognize what he was doing. throwing punches left and right towards the man who dared touched you. he barely even registered the hit he managed on no one but him can put his hands on you. he’s had that thought before but never brought life to it, but here? now?

all thoughts of guilt for feeling that way vanished. there was no way he was letting anyone touch you. but him. that’s all he wanted. he wanted you in a way he didn’t think was reciprocated. love was a funny thing to him, something he was never accustomed to until after he met rhysand and cassian.

his family never showed it, he lives with the constant knowledge of that every time he looks down at his hands. he thought about the way you never judged him of them, like it was nothing at all to you but that was everything to him.

the one sided crush he harbored on mor for a couple years was nothing in comparison to the way he felt about you. his few flings he had over the past couple years (after he realized it was pointless liking mor, also… because she slept with cassian) were mildly of convince and of urge but once he met you, he knew he was a goner.

he stopped the girls. the stopped the meaningless flirting and hooks up and took to just pleasuring himself to the thought as you, as shitty as it made him felt after. sometimes he just couldn’t look you in the eye the next time he saw you but you never said anything. you never commented on it and he silently thanked you in his head.

but right now, after he pulled you out of the party, scarred hand in yours, he needed you to look him in the eyes. but you still hadn’t and he couldn’t just keep staring at the face of the beautiful woman in front of him while it was coated with anxiety and exhaustion.

azriel lifted his distorted hand to your face meeting the soft warm skin that was your own. he gently brought your face to meet his gaze and as you locked eyes, the spark hit you yet again.

gods he was breathtaking. dark hair that covered to above his ears, the eyes that seemed to stare into yours every single time they met, the tattoos that covered him and his golden brown skin that you swore shined outright during different points in the day. your heart cannot handle this man.

“please,” he practically whispered you barely even registered that he said it before he continued, “are you okay, what can i do?” the sound in his voice felt desperate as his eyes bore into yours, the feel of his hand on her face, you couldn’t help but lean into his grasp and close your eyes, taking in the feel of him. you responded a moment later after letting out a sigh and looking at him again.

“can we just go home? i just want to sleep” you asked him with a pleading tone as you feel his thumb rub against your cheek for the second time that night. ugh the things this man does to you. all you wanted was for him to hold you, to feel the press of his body against yours. anything to get the feeling of someone else off you. “yeah baby, we can.” he said gently before he moved his hand down to yours and gave you a light squeeze before he turned the car on and shifted into gear, pulling off in the direction of home.

once you arrived back to the apartment building, he parked in the lot next to the front door and moved around the car to open your door, he gave you his hand as you stepped out. he went to put his hand at your lower back as he opened the door for you but decided against just in case that was a lot for you right now. he did not want to make it worse. he could see the fear in your eyes back there, no way would he subject you to that if you weren’t comfortable with it. so instead he just followed behind you, hitting the button to the elevator to take you up to your floor.

the elevator luckily isn’t taking forever today so when it opens, you and azriel step in and he goes to hit the floor for your apartment but your hand reaches out and stops him. “can we go to yours please?” your head moves up to meet his gaze but his eyes are focused on where your hand is on his wrist. a second later his eyes meet yours and he gives you a small nod and hits the button for the fifth floor. you remove your hand and lean against the wall right next to him, his hand reaches out and entangles his bumpy fingers with yours.

“is this okay?” he asks you. you can barely hold it in after that, the tears finally fall. he feels the sudden change in your body as he moves closer to you but removing his hand from yours in fear that you didn’t want to touch him. but in reality that’s all you want. you want him to touch you. you want him to love you. you want everything with him. its all just so overwhelming, everything that has happened.

he goes to speak but before he can get a word out, your body is on his engulfing him in a hug around his long torso, he instantly wraps his arms around your smaller frame. he can feel your body shake with tears and all he wants to do is make sure that no one ever makes you feel like this again. you deserve so much better, he only wishes he could be better for you too. you squeeze him tighter and he just holds you until the elevator door opens and you pull away from him. mascara and tears running down your face, you can see it on his shirt. he smiles at you before he pulls his hands to your face and wipes your cheeks off with his rough yet soft hands.

you cant help the laugh that escapes you as he wipes his hands on the t-shirt staining it even more with the leftover residue on your face. he gives you a chuckle before connected your hands yet again, walking with you out of the elevator to his one bedroom apartment. he fishes in his pocket with his other hand and pulls out his keys. he unlocked the door and held it open for you to walk in.

your senses are taken over by the smell of him. the smell of his candle lingered from the coffee table covered with textbooks in the large living room, he has a basket of blankets he keeps in the corner because he knows you get cold watching tv. he has a big L shaped couch which had a 60 inch tv across the room, with a boatload of dvds underneath. something you both agreed was a dying art. you and azriel swear physical media will make a comeback one day but you guys will never forget how they ruined it!

his space was a lot bigger since you have a two bedroom apartment. but it was perfect for him. azriel had loved the way he made his space his own, his bass guitars set up in the corner next to his collection of vinyl records and a record player that rhys and cassian got him when he turned 21… as well as a shit ton of booze. he had a bookshelf that held his favorites, as well as your own.

he bought a copy of almost every book you talked about so that he was in the loop with what you were reading. even the ones you didn’t talk about that he caught on your nightstand or in your reading nook. when he bought one of those and read it, his jaw dropped. he immediately thought of nesta and her smutty books but this sent something else though his body. he couldn’t help but keep reading… he wondered if you thought about him while reading these scenes of them ravishing each other, in every way imaginable. he sure did! his right hand hates him!

and you definitely did to… thought about him in ways that you shouldn’t. thinking about him doing all those things to you. the way you knew he would take care of you. the way you knew you could take care of him, despite how inexperienced you are. the thoughts drove you crazy. it was practically all day and every day at this point. thinking about the way his hands would feel running up your thighs or the way his lips would feel on yours.

now here you are, standing in his living room, just wanting all that and little did you know… he did too.

“hey az…” you uttered towards him. he was already next to you as you spoke, “can we lay down please?” your voice was barely a whisper.

he didn’t even need to speak, he just brought you to his room. he lead you to sit on the corner of the bed as he turned and riffled through his dresser, pulling out a large dark green shirt and handing it to you with a smile, “change into this, i’ll be right back.”

“can i take a shower?” you asked azriel shyly. “yes of course, one sec.” you watched as he walked out the room and shut the door behind him. you took your shoes off and placed them by the bedroom door next to azriel’s shoes. he came back in a second later with a fresh towel and a water bottle.

“here you go, you already know where the shower is,” he says with a small chuckle. you give him a grateful smile and a thank you as you took the items from his hands and gave him one last look before heading into his connecting bathroom.

you turned on the hot water and you stripped out of your clothes and threw them into the laundry hamper in the corner of the bathroom. you got in the shower and felt instantly better. the way the water followed hot you could feel the touch of the man from the party washing away, only to be replaced with thoughts of azriel touching you instead. you reviled in it.

you washed your hair and body with his shampoo, conditioner and body wash. silently thanking him for not using 3-in-1 (nesta found out that’s what cassian used and flipped shit) you finished your shower and dried off with the towel he gave you.

you put on his t-shirt that made its way down to your mid thigh when it was on completely. you loved when you were covered in him. you walked back out into the room and didn’t see azriel so you took your seat at the edge of the bed and waiting for him to come back. you sat there and picked at your nails, feeling so wore out you didn’t even want to cry anymore.

azriel came in two minutes later, dressed him long flannel pajama pants and you can see the band of his underwear peeking out as he gets closer to you. he changed after you went into the bathroom, and then went to the kitchen to make sure he was stocked up on the tea you liked and the snacks you guys enjoy together, just in case you got hungry.

he ran around his living room and cleaned random odds and ends. putting dishes in the sink, folding the blankets thrown on the couch and organizing his cd collection. anything to busy himself instead of thinking of you in his shower. anything to get his mind off the amazing woman just in the other room. he hears the shower turn off and waited a few more moments before heading back into the room.

he moved the covers down to make room for you as he said, “after you princess,” with a smile on his face. you returned it and stood up to make your way to the bed but not before turning to hug him again. his arms wrapped around you as you mumbled “thank you azriel,” into his chest. you hold on for a few moments before releasing him. he looks at you before motioning to the bed, “i would do anything for you, you know that.” you felt your cheeks grow red at the thought, at the knowledge that he would.

you climb into the bed and laid your head on the pillow, turning to look at azriel, you wondered why he was still standing. “az are you coming?” you said bashfully. he blinked and bent down to the bed to be eye level with you. “i’m gonna sleep on the couch tonight.” you could feel the way your face dropped in disappointment as you registered what he said. he saw it too and felt it deep in his chest.

he stood up and was about to say goodnight but you beat him to it, “azriel please i need you.”

you could feel how desperate you sounded but you didn’t care. you just needed him. next to you right now. he said nothing else as he moved the blankets again, but this time he was under them. he didn’t hesitate to pull you into his chest, your hand found it’s way over his fast beating heart and his tattooed arm wrapping around you. the warmth and scent of him took over everything in your body. you finally felt safe. your legs tangled together as you eventually fell asleep to the rise and fall of his chest.

“i need you too.” he said to a room with no one awake but him to hear.

part 2??? i would love to write one! let me know what you think! i’d love to keep writing for acotor so yay! pls enjoy :) i’m on the edge of my seat writing this hehe

[astrstqr]

☆˙˖ DESIRED REALITY !

things i script for my modern dr. lmk if you want more

⬭ racism, homophobia, ableism, transphobia, islamophobia, anti semitism, misogyny, global warming, climate change, overconsumption, overpopulation, deforestation, habitat destruction etc., used to exist, however they currently do not and will never suffer from them again.

⬭ everyone is treated equal

⬭ no “pro-life”

⬭ people are allowed to have abortions no matter what age they are

⬭ women products are free such as pads/tampons and birth control

⬭ everyone is educated on problems happening around the world

⬭ health care is free

⬭ natives are seen as the founders of America

⬭ south, west, southeast, & central Asians are seen too + people know Asia is not just the east

⬭ having guns are illegal unless your job requires you to have one and there is no other way to get a gun

⬭ periods last a day and are very light

⬭ covid-19 doesn’t exist

⬭ plastic surgery is normalized , isnt look down on but people rarely gets it unless necessary

⬭ children of any age are not sexualized in any form or shape

⬭ in public bathrooms the toilet is always clean, people don't knock on the stall you are in, there is always toilet paper, always soap and a hand dryer

⬭ the Chinese government isn't so harsh & gives the citizens freedom

⬭ people of color’s cultures are RESPECTED, & not appropriated

⬭ foster care takes treats kids nicely

⬭ nobody harms animals and kill shelters are not a thing

⬭ all country leaders are good and honest people

⬭ human trafficking does not exist

⬭ the government never watches you through your phone

⬭ trump never ran for president

⬭ no world hungers

⬭ no one is homeless, and everyone has a home

⬭ world peace

⬭ women and men are equal

⬭ it’s easy for people to make money

⬭ all sickness has a cure

⬭ bullying does not exist

⬭ black history and pride month still exist

⬭ the government isn't greedy and take care of their people

⬭ every country has money, food, isnt poor, etc. etc.

⬭ no toxic parenting

⬭ the Sewol ferry never had an accident

⬭ school shooting doesn’t exist

⬭ minimum wage is $15-$20 an hour

⬭ crimes are punished with justice in mind

⬭ history is recorded correctly

⬭ people can start driving at 15

⬭ Korea is not conservative

⬭ Korea doesn’t have an unrealistic beauty standard

⬭ Korea never divided, it is united and free. But south of korea is like the city part and the north is like rural part

⬭ pollution does not exist

⬭ earth air is clean and easy to breathe no matter where you are

⬭ no acid rain, urban sprawl, ozone layer depletion

⬭ allergies do not exist

⬭ the world is more colorful and not dull looking

⬭ coral reef still has it color

⬭ no water in unwanted places

⬭ grass is always green

⬭ if the population increases the planet gets bigger to produce resources to accommodate the growing population. it doesnt effect the mass of the earth or the gravitational pull

⬭ global warming doesn't exist

⬭ humidity doesn't ruin hair

⬭ the library of alexandria was never destroyed

⬭ apple pencils work on iPhone

⬭ everything is wireless, and nothing needs a cord

⬭ line is always short in stores and restaurants

⬭ buildings and renovating don’t take longer than a wee

⬭ you can book a hotel with being 18 or older

⬭ traffic is always fine

⬭ netflix have more of a large selection of things and dont remove shows/add shows no one wants

⬭ spotify is free

⬭ the switch have a web browser

⬭ tv companies still make tv shows similar to the 2000s and early 2010s , just updated to keep up with the times

⬭ the sims franchise lore is linear throughout the series

the open world features from sims 3 is still present in sims 4

sims 4 is like an updated and better version of sims 3 keeping all the features from the sims 3 (still including everything that is already in sims 4)

non of the games have bugs

every expansion pack etc is just added to the game as an update and no one has to pay for it

⬭ cheap jewelry doesnt tarnish

⬭ washer/dryer cycles are 15 mins

⬭ in the show dancing dolls everyone was treated equally and was never fake to each other.

⬭ people actually do the theme for the met gala and it’s always unique

୨୧⠀˙⠀⠀˖⠀ world aesthetic & vibe

[whyse7vn]

PALENTINES -

[ ot7 x reader ]

SINGLE LADIES 😁🔥

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

tae: gave my gf an hour long whimpering audio for valentines day

namjoon: you make me sick

jimin: this definitely counts as harassment

jk: yoongi got me a plastic fork

yoongi: yw

y/n: the audio was 5 minutes long????

tae: ok but i sent it to you 20 times

do the math????

jin: you sat there and whimpered into ur phone for 5 minutes that’s crazy

don’t you feel any shame??

tae: why would i feel shame?

it’s called being in love jin

you should try it sometime

jimin: it’s called harassment

hobi: ew man

jk: free asmr :D

jin: it’s gonna be free tae from jail soon

tae: no it won’t

jimin: ur right when you get locked up no one’s gonna want you free

hobi: KEEP TAE IN JAIL 🗣️💯

jk: personally i would want tae free

jimin: personally ur not real so it doesn’t matter what you want

jk: :ᗡ

hobi: ew how the hell did you flip it

i hate that

ew

jk: :ᗡ

hobi: HOW DID YOU DO THAT

jk: :ᗡ

hobi: STOP GO AWAY I HATE IT

namjoon: yoongi got jungkook a present this year?

yoongi: not by choice

y/n: it was by choice

hobi: it was a plastic fork

yoongi: a plastic fork not given by choice

y/n: yoongi

yoongi: no

y/n: please

yoongi: no

y/n: pretty please :3

yoongi: it was by choice

y/n: see told you!

yoongi: don’t understand why we have to buy each other shit on this holiday anyways

i like ONE of you not all of you

tae: am i the one you like be honest

yoongi: bye

y/n: it’s our silly little tradition don’t be a loser yoongi

yoongi: whatever

jin: ok anyways who ordered me a fucking marching band???

jk: idk but did you like it??

y/n: gonna take a wild guess and say it was jungkook

namjoon: i thought you have his card how did he order that??

y/n: he has apple pay now i can’t stop him 😕

hobi: wait no fair

jin did NOT deserve a marching band all he got me was his butter photocard???

jimin: he got me that too….

jk: OMG ME TOO >_<

tae: i don’t feel special anymore

namjoon: really jin?

y/n: mine was signed!!

yoongi: cheap

jin: you literally got kook a plastic fork?

yoongi: he loves it

jungkook tell him you love it

jk: i love it

yoongi: see

jin: whatever don’t care

jimin: namjoon got me a fucking book

jin: lol that’s crazy cuz you can’t read

jk: i’m sorry to hear you can’t read jimin hope you can soon :/

namjoon: i put a lot of thought into the book i got you

jin: that’s cute but he can’t read so

jk: i wish i was a book

tae: if you’re a book does that make you a tree?

jk: guys

y/n: no jungkook

jk: oh ok

jimin: i CAN read btw

yoongi: don’t care

jin: sounds like fake news

jk: omg wow ur a fast learner jimin you can read now!!!

jimin: ur talking way too much today

you should stop

jk: is he talking to me????

hobi: y/n got me a holiday to australia

i’m not gonna go cuz like bugs

but that was really nice

y/n: you’re welcome!!!!

tae: k but i got sex

y/n deleted this message!

tae: 😕

silencing me like they did MLK

jimin: what

jk: milk

hobi: did you just compare urself to mlk?

jin: yeah never say that again

tae: why not?? it’s true

yoongi: you are nothing like mlk

jk: tae ur not milk

namjoon: taehyung do not compare yourself to martin luther king ever again please and thank you

jk: or milk

y/n: and in black history month too…

tae: you don’t understand me or him

y/n: yeah ok

back to gifts

joon got me some really pretty flowers

jimin: boringggggggg he does that every year

jk: namjoon got me wood

hobi: ?

namjoon: statue

it’s a wooden statue thing

not just wood

tae: joon giving other boys wood for valentines ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

u wanna know who i gave MY wood too

y/n deleted this message!

namjoon: tae shut up

jin: saw that

tae: i’m just like mlk i’m telling you man

y/n: stop

tae: sorry

jimin: hobi got me shoes

hobi: i did

jk: hobi got me cheese

hobi: expensive cheese

y/n: i took yoongi to those cute photo booth things

yoongi: they didn’t need to know that

y/n: yes they did

we are sharing what we got each other

read the room yoongi

jimin: yeah yoongi read the room

tae: how tf u read a room??!

a room not a book ☠️☠️

u guys dumb as hell

jin: you not knowing what reading a room means makes a lot of sense actually

jk: send photobooth pics ^0^

bet u looked so cute

not you yoongi

y/n

her

not yoongi

i’m talking to y/n NOT you yoongi btw

yoongi: shut up

and no

you’ll never see those photos

jk: ☹️

hobi: so what did yoongi get y/n??

yoongi: don’t worry

tae: personally i’m worried

jk: me 2 guys yoongi is really scary

what if he killed her

y/n: ?

jin: i want to blow jungkook up

jk: i’m no ballon 😭

jimin: probably fucked for valentines let’s be real

tae: well that’s obviously NOT true lmao 😜 ☠️

yoongi: why is that “obviously” not true

we could of

tae: you didn’t

yoongi: and you know how?

tae: cuz i just know

yoongi: yeah ok

we could of for all you know

on the actual day too

tae: you weren’t even with her on valentine’s day

yoongi: and you were?

y/n: he wasn’t

tae: ok

but i could of been

yoongi: but clearly you weren’t

tae: neither were you

namjoon: both of you stop

tae: idk why yoongi acts all high a mighty

especially when it comes to her

y/n: ok that’s crazy

how about you don’t talk about me like i’m not here!

yoongi: idk why taehyung acts like he has a chance lmao

jk: guys

tae: that’s actually crazy

you’d be fucking surprised yoongi!!!!

yoongi: what’s that supposed to mean?

tae: what do you think it means?

tell me yoongi

guess

i’ll tell you if you’re right or not

yoongi: shut the fuck up

tae: or what?

hobi: why this kinda sexualllll

jimin: like 😭😭😭😭

y/n: LMAO STOP

jin: arguing over pussy that belongs to neither of them is crazy i’m just saying

jk: pussy \ ^0^ /

namjoon: how about we all stop arguing and move back to talking about the gifts we got eachother !!

hobi: jungkook got me a ballon

jk: yeah

do you love it

hobi: sure

jk: ^_^

jimin: personally i think hobi’s lying to you kook

jk: WHAT

jimin: i think he hates his ballon actually

jk: hobi pls say he’s lying

hobi: he’s lying

you see it may seem that way because on the outside im a very chill and nonchalant man

y/n: that is not true actually!

hobi: but on inside i am actually very chalant

EXTREMELY chalant no joke

so basically inside im going fucking crazy over the ballon jungkook gave me but it just doesn’t seem like that cuz im a chill guy

jk: but inside ur chalant

hobi: exactly

jk: jimin why would you lie to me

jimin: ur easy to lie to

jk: no im not

jimin: namjoon died in a car crash 24 hours ago

jk: NO NAMJOON OHHMYGOD NAMJOON NO

namjoon: i am not dead

jk: oh

y/n: how did you fall for that

namjoon cant even drive

jk: oh yeah

lol namjoon cant drive guys

namjoon: ok we all know

hobi: so what did you guys actually do on valentine’s day

jk: minecraft but then it got too scary so i played valorant instead

jimin: idk what any of that means but ok

i personally watched movies with joon

namjoon: yeah

i dropped by kook’s and y/n’s place first tho to give my gifts and stuff

hobi: where was my movie invite?????

jimin: we did call you

you were like high as hell

hobi: oh

wow

how real of me

jin: i cooked steak

jimin: for urself?

typical

jin: kys

no

for me and y/n actually

y/n: …

jin: my fault

yoongi: what

tae: oh

jk: SHE SAID SHE WAS BUSY

TTAHSTNOT FAIIROGJKFNKLDVLKFNKLFHKLNNDKVHNFKVNKLGNGR UFHDFHDKJ GHDKLNGFKLNGFG FHJDJHHGR DHGGRHBDNBF JGHKJGHGR

hobi: ????????????????????

namjoon: cool

jimin: jin???? out of everyone JIN??????

why would you fuck jin

jk: WHATR OHMYGOF WHAT?????? SHUT UP

jimin: on valentine’s day too…..

even fucking ME would make more sense than jin right now

jin: tf is that supposed to mean?

jimin: i said what i said lmao

tae: she cant of fucked jin

cuz she’s fucking me

yoongi: LMAOOOO

u really think your special dont you

thats crazy

jk: WHYIS EVERYONEFUCKING MY GIRLFRIENDOHMGYOJFDJFDKJDSDB

hobi: i dont get it even if she was fucking tae why couldn’t she fucked jin too?

y/n: i am like right here you know

tae: because me and her are serious

yoongi: serious???

you are just a rebound

tae: yoongi i think you’re just upset she didn’t come to you first after the whole jaehyun thing

yoongi: i’m glad she didn’t actually because now i know for sure i’m not rebound

you are

tae: shut the fuck up

yoongi: why? you getting upset?

idk why you’re acting like the victim here when you’re using her for the same thing

hobi: woah??

jimin: cap taehyung bitchless

yoongi: it’s time you stop using y/n to get over jennie and grow some fucking balls

jin: hold on

jimin: WAITTTTTTTT

hobi: SHUT FUCKING DOWN FR????

jk: imgonnapassout

y/n: oh

namjoon: yoongi

tae: i am not using y/n to get over jennie and you know that

hobi: wait ur fr??? taejennie was fr??

LIKE ACTUALLY?? OHMYGIDTHISISREAL??

yoongi: i know that? thats crazy how could i know that??

you didn’t even tell us about jennie

for over 3 months you were with her and you didn’t tell us

and then those photos of you and her were leaked and you were all depressed for ”no reason”

and now all of a sudden your obsession with y/n?

yeah you’re not using her you’re right i’m just fucking stupid aren’t i?

jimin: holy shit man

tae: i am not using her

yoongi: so why is yeontan with jennie right now?

y/n: tae you told me he was with you parents?

tae: yeah

but

i didn’t tell you that because im using you or anything i just said that because i didn’t want to cause any problems

y/n: you lied to me

for no reason

if you told me the truth it would of been fine

tae: i know

y/n: so when i came over

were you planing on sleeping with me anyways?

were you mad at yourself for calling jennie and leaving yeontan with her?

did you use me to help forget about it?

tae: did you use me to help get over jaehyun?

y/n: no

i can tell you that in full confidence no

now answer my question

tae: you know i would never do that to you

y/n: its a yes or no question taehyung

tae: i would never do that to you

yoongi: yes or no you asshole

tae: shut the fuck up

yoongi: answer her question

tae: leave me the fuck alone

tae left “SINGLE LADIES😁🔥”

jk: wow

y/n: didn’t sleep with jin btw

jk: ohthankgod

y/n: did sleep with tae once

we are NOT serious

jk: double ohthankgod

wait

y/n: and now i am going to sleep

jungkook come cuddle

gn all

jk: ON MY WAY OHMYGOD IM ON MY WAY

gn

jimin: good night …

hobi: nite!!

yoongi: gn

jin: goodnight

namjoon: gn

DOWNBAD😭🫵🏻 #2 (minus tae)

6 participants - 5 online

———————————

namjoon: yoongi that wasn’t fair

yoongi: i know

but she deserved to know

and he wasn’t gonna tell her any time soon

hobi: YOU AND NAMJOON KNEW THIS TAEJENNIE WAS REAL THIS WHOLE TIME????

yoongi: i just found out

namjoon knew longer

namjoon: not that long

jimin: ok but how do you know tae is using her fr?

yoongi: it’s not hard to connect the dots

jin: still you could be wrong

yoongi: well he didn’t deny it did he?

jimin: to me it looked like he didn’t know if he was using her or not

yoongi: well he needs to figure that out soon it’s not fair to her

or him ig

but mainly her.

—

hate this don’t care about anything bring back yellow….

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie @threeopossumsinacoat @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin @elissasimp @socksfirstalways @knjlvr06 @lailaisarmy @thvkives @xstfudaisyx @xxxanimangxxx @solstice34 @ml8dy @hoeforseoks

[the-bi-library]

Happy Black History Month! Here are upcoming bi black books! Make sure to preorder the ones that interest you!

Did I miss any books? If yes, then, feel free to let me know 💖

Books listed:

The Poisons We Drink by Bethany Baptiste

Saint-Seducing Gold (The Forge & Fracture Saga #2) by Brittany N. Williams

Dear Bi Men: A Black Man's Perspective on Power, Consent, Breaking Down Binaries, and Combating Erasure by J.R. Yussuf

We Will Devour The Night (The Essence of the Equinox, #2) by Camilla Andrew

I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast Is Me by Jamison Shea

I Am the Dark That Answers When You Call by Jamison Shea

A Little Kissing Between Friends by Chencia C. Higgins

The 7-10 Split by Karmen Lee

[koliejeon]

Tainted by You - JJK

╰┈➤ 𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: nerd yandere jk x queen bee reader!

╰┈➤ 𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: who would have thought that being tainted by the nerd Jeon Jungkook would feel this good.

╰┈➤ 𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 3.3k+

╰┈➤ 𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: manipulation, gaslighting, dumbification cock riding, fingering, dom jk, sub! reader, cream pie, squirting, size kink, blackmailing, yandere jk, slightly mean jk, degradation.

You're considered the queen bee of your university, the one who's always seen as the epitome of perfection, with everyone admiring how much of a pretty face and a smart student you are. Being looked up to by everyone on this kind of level really boosts your ego, so it's a shame if anyone would know how much of a  moaning bitch you are while riding the cock of the biggest nerd in school, Jeon Jungkook. 

But It's not your fault that he just fucks you too good... 

He’s just too good at it that you can’t help youself coming back for more, even if you fully knew that this would taint your reputation as a queen bee. I mean, everyone’s expecting you to date someone who’s on your level, and not just a nerd dude with a messy curly black hair and thick glasses that just covers his features. 

But to your defense, he’s not what everyone is thinking of him of. That boy who’s always shy around people, and just keeps himself accompanied with his books has a totally different persona when it’s just the two of you alone. He’s not shy, he’s actually arrogant, mean, manipulative and hot…

Yeah, hot… like how hot the depts of hell could feel like.

It all started last month when your stupid history professor decided to paired you up with him for a project. You didn’t have a problem with it, you thought that with this project, he might open up with you and to others instead of being that awkward nerd guy that everyone hates.

╰┈➤ 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙩𝙝

The bell rang as a sign that the class discussion has already ended and that it’s now time for lunch. “You may now leave the class, don’t forget to communicate with your partners and discuss the project” Mr. Lim, your History professor, reminded to everyone as they started packing their things to leave the class. Some replied a simple “yes” to him, while some didn’t bother and just hurriedly leave the room before the canteen seats would run out.

“Y/N, hurry up, let’s go now!” Jennie, who’s one of your friends said to you as she’s waiting for you near the classroom’s door. You smiled at here and was about to say something along the lines of “Yeah, i’m coming,” but you got distracted when you saw the boy in one of the backseats, he looks so lonely in there packing his things ever so slowly – probably taking his time since no one is inviting him anyway to go for a lunch, and for some reason you felt pity for him. “Actually, just go ahead first, I remember I have something to do this time” you lied to her, and she simply just agreed to what you said as she quickly tag along with her other friends.

Now it’s just the two of you alone in the classroom, you awkwardly approach him… unsure of how to start a conversation with him. “Uhm… Jungkook right?” you asked even know the answer is already obvious.  He looked up at you and stared at you for atleast 5 seconds before responding “Y-yeah that’s me” he managed to mutter that out with a little stutter. You thought he was just shy, and you hate it. This is literally the reason why he’s being made fun of by those bullies. You brushed off that thought as you brightly smiled at him, “Great! I’m Y/N, Mr. Lim paired us up for the project. I suggest if we start doing it as early as possible” 

“I’m okay with that” he simply replied.

“I’m free later, are you okay with that? I just don’t know where we can do the project though, My apartment is not that great since it’s small and I’m sharing it with Jennie” You stated, already feeling comfortable in conversing with him even though he’s not literally replying anything and just looking at you. You  guess he’s more of a listener rather than a talker. “Aha! How about we do the project at your place?”  you suggested out of nowhere. The project has to do with arts and crafts, so coffee shops are not the best place to do the project. 

Jungkook eyes seemed to widen from being shock with what you’ve said. He can't even believe it. You want to go to his house??? This is something straight out from his dreams.

“Y-yeah…sure, why not” he was really glad and euphoric that you’ve said that, but his reply came like he was just forced to say yes.  “Great! You can send me your address” you said, and he frowned but not enough for you to notice, what do you mean by that? You don’t wanna go with him together at his house later? “Uhm… lets just go together later” he suggested, and you nervously chuckled, no way your gonna go with him after class, people might see you and probably make fun of you for hanging out with a weird guy like him.

“But-”

“It’s kind of far away from here and you might get lost” he explained without stuttering, while straightly looking in your eyes. Those thick glasses might have cover his intense gaze, but definitely not the tension that’s starting to form in the room.

There’s this something from his aura, it’s like a sudden change that you could clearly figure out, but it surely made you nervous as you gulped. You wanted to say something but you were unable to get the right word out of your mouth, so instead you simply just agreed with him “...m’kay” you said while looking at the ground like a child who got declined by your parents to buy the toy that you wanted in the store. 

Yeah, you wanted to somehow talk to him, but not like this!  You were sulking with the idea and Jungkook found it cute that he smirk at your behavior. He broke the silence by saying good bye to you for now, “So I guess were already settled? I’ll see you at the parking lot” 

╰┈➤ 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙠𝙞𝙥𝙨 - 𝙖𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙡𝙤𝙩

It’s already 6 PM when I headed in the parking lot as I try to spot where Jungkook might be. Classes are already finished at 5:30 PM but I made sure to be late so that no one familiar would spot me getting onto Jungkook’s vehicle. This almost feels like I’m doing some sort of a crime, even though I am not. After a few minutes of searching he spots me and raised his hand to get my attention. I immediately went into his direction and damn… I just don’t know how to feel.

He’s leaning in a black sedan that I suppose is his with his left hand in his pocket and the other hand holding a cigarette. This is the only time that I’ve noticed he has veiny hands. Just what the actual fuck! It feels like I’m looking at the same person from an hour ago! He’s definitely not the typical nerd you get to see everyday. I mean, a nerd with a sedan who’s looking hot as ever while smoking?! I was basically gawking at the new sight, and I only got out from my delusions when he cleared his throat.

“Let’s go?” He said as he throw the cigarette on the ground and stomped on it. “Yeah” is the only thing I was able to mutter as I went to the passenger side of his car. I buckled my seatbelt on, and he started driving. He was wearing a ripped jeans and a grey Calvin Clien hoodie that he later on re-adjusted, exposing his left arm that is covered with tattoos. Do I even fully know this guy??? It seems like all those school gossips about him are just pure lies.

He was not lying, his house was really a bit far from the University, not to mention the slight traffic on the way. His house was located somewhere inside of an expensive looking village.

“You live here?” You asked after getting out of his car. The house was big, and looks expensive with a modern touch to its’ architecture. “Yeah, my parents gifted it to me last year” he replied like it was nothing as he guided you through the main entrance of his house. What kind of parents would gift their child an expensive house?! For fucks sake he didn’t even graduated yet or is about to get married. His parents must be crazy rich like those in the movies.

“I already have the needed materials, is it okay for you to wait here? I just needed to freshen up”

“Ugh… yeah sure. I’ll just play some music in my phone” I said, and he simply chuckled before opening the television for me without saying anything. I feel poor being here., well yeah my parents are also well-off, but not on this level!  Waiting for him for at least 25 minutes was boring so I just made myself at home as I watched the movie playing in the television. 

“You should take a picture” he suddenly said which caught me off guard

“I- what?”

“You’re looking at me a little too much”

“No I wasn’t!” I tried to deny it even though it was already obvious as my face became as red as a tomato from being so embarrassed, that I choosed to look on the floor, being shy to even look at him” Inside of my head, I was scolding myself for acting that way, he must have now think of me as a pervert!

He started approaching me, and before I knew it, he lifted up my chin as he cupped my face with both of his hands so that I would look at him. We we’re both looking at each other’s eyes, and then everything just happened so fast, I didn’t even know why I let It happen, but we we’re now passionately kissing as both of our tongues fought for dominance in which he obviously won. We were now in his bedroom but before things could  get even more heated, I tap his shoulder thrice as a sign that I want it to stop. Gladly, he accepted my request and pulled back, “This is wrong” I simply told him, and a that made him ‘tsk’ as his face contorted an annoyed look.

“Wrong? Tell me what’s wrong about this Y/N?!” He answered back, he’s clearly not liking what I’ve told him but him. I can’t just answer him by saying that I don’t want to be associated with someone like him, people would make fun of me, and my reputation as a queen bee who’s always been perfect would be tainted. I don’t want them to think that choosing Jungkook was a bad decision, and that I’ve made a wrong decision. But I just can’t also tell that to Jungkook, I don’t want him to feel bad himself even though those are the true reason. I remained silent without moving a single inch of my body, my hand are still in his shoulder while he’s arms are wrapped on my waist. We were standing in the middle of the room, but even though were close enough, I didn’t had the urge to look in his eyes even though I know that he’s  looking at me with burning gaze.

“What? You don’t know how to answer now? Cat got your tongue? Or  you’re stupid little mind can’t just comprehend simple things?!” All his words hurt like hell, I didn’t even realize he could say such mean things to me, when all I knew is that we was that shy nerd boy at the back of the class who doesn’t even know how to fight back from his bullies. “Stupid Y/N, can’t even explain herself” he continued belittling me and it was all to much that I burst out and cry myself in his chest. He was shocked for a while but then embraced me in his arms as he let me cry all my worries while shushing me down “Shhh it’s okay darling, I know you’re little brain hurts from thinking too much, you don’t have to think, that’s my job, and you only have to follow what I say, right? It’s true, my mind was clouded and it hurts, so I just let him embrace me while drawing circles on my back.

It stayed like that for a while but then Jungkook drop the bomb, “I know you think it’s wrong because it would taint your reputation. Their poor queen bee Lee Y/N dating the nerd Jeon Jungkook? Doesn’t sound good to them right?” I look up at him, unable to say anything, and that just made me tear up more. “I’m sorry” I muttered to him as I buried myself in his bare chest, the citrus scent of his body wash engulfing my nostrils.

“Shhh… it’s okay baby, I know how much you love the attention the campus is giving you, it makes your dumb ego grow right? But the thing is, you ONLY need my attention”

“I’m sorry - Y/N’s really sorry” I said, already at my worst point as I continued to cry. I feel like a bad person based on what’s he’s telling me, but that’s the truth, I’m too self-concious of what people will say to me, I’m someone who starved attention, and I just feel bad that Jungkook has to know that side of me, and I’m now thinking that I hurted his feelings because I was too selfish. So I kept on apologizing “Gguk, Y/N’s sorry, please forgive her”

Jungkook smirked in victory, he knew he fully had you in control, oh just how easy it is to manipulate you. To break you into pieces so that he can fix you again, and then make feel like he’s the only one who can fix and save you from yourself.

“Shh… I was really hurt, darling. What you did was wrong, how come you think of me as a person that would taint your reputation when all I do is love you from a far?” that made me feel guilty more…

“But I would forgive you if…

“If what? Please tell me, Gguk, I will make it up to you, I promise!” I said, feeling determined to fix my mistake.

“If you make love with me. Prove me that you love me, that you need me, and that you’re not afraid to be tainted by me” and so, without much thought, I kissed him deeply, I opened my mouth, inviting him to intertwine his tongue in my hot cavern, as he lifted my shirt and carry me on his bed. I am now laying on my back, the tension from both us rising as I hurriedly removed my pants, leaving me in my underwear. The sight infront of me, him hovering above me as he continued kissing me while exploring every inch of my body had me whimpering in his bed. He started attacking my neck, making sure to leave as many hickies he could so that everyone knows I’m his.

His right hand started massaging my breast while the one started licking and sucking my nipple. The pleasure was just too good to be true, and after a seconds, my buds now sensitive and hardened as I continued moaning shamelessly. The pleasure that he’s giving me was just too god that I started unconciously buckling my hips to his hardened dick.  “Too impatients aren’t you?” he teased, and I just whimpered. He took off my panties, looking at my dripping core, already wet for him. “Please hurry,”  “Easy there, princess we have to to adjust your pretty little pussy first so it woudn’t hurt that much, okay?” he’s talking to me as if I’m some dumb kid, it was embarrasing but it makes me more turned on. Two fingers were pushed in my hole, I was shocked at the sudden intrusion but he soothed it by drawing circles on clit. “See? My fingers are even too much for you, how can you properly take my cock if you’re like that?” I wanted to disagree with him but I coudn’t utter a single word as he started fastly moving his digits inside me. “One more,  please” he only chuckled after hearing that, and I’ve never felt so pathetic in my entire life. He must’ve known that I’m  being dumbly determined just to impress him, but I later regret that when he fulfilled my wish. 

“As you wish, darling” the third finger definitely burned my inside like hell, he’s fingers are not just long but also thick. After some time, my moans got louder and louder as I trembled in his fingers, and before I knew it, I squirted a lot, but he didn’t stop from fingering me, until I was begging him to stop “Ggukie…. To-too much please” and with that he removed his fingers on me...

“You haven’t even got the real thing yet. Plus you promised me, you would make it up for me, right?  I was really hurt you know?”

“Sorry, I forgot” I embarrassedly admitted with a pout  and he only chuckled at me “I know, it’s okay, I’m always here to remind you”

“Have you tried riding a cock before?” his question caught me off guard, 

“What??? No I’ve never! Plus… you’re actually my first”

“Good, cause I will make sure that that person would die, if someone comes first on you before me. How about you become a good girl and right my dick, yeah? Prove me that you’re really sorry” I blushed at his statement but I didn’t bother to disagree with his request, I was at fault and I should make it up.

He’s leaning on the headboard right now, and Ii’m straddling his lap, while he lined up his cock in my entrance. I started moving down ever so slowly, but Jungkook was patient enough. But you know what they say, patience can also grew out easily, “What if it hurts?” I dumbly asked him, knowing that it would hurt more after seeing his size. He’s length is around 7 inch and it’s very thick, “It’s supposed to hurt, Darling” and with that, both of his hands pushed me down on his length, it hurt at first, but after a few seconds of adjusting, it felt like a bliss of heaven. I continued to bounce up and down on his length while moaning loudly as he played with my boobs, “Touch your clit, love” I did as what I was told and it was the best feeling I could ever imagine. Later on, I grew tired and cummed on his dick, but he didn’t stop there, instead he controlled my hip movement as he buckled is hips to reach his high and cum deep inside me. I was already pliant as black out after the session.

You may have not seen it, but Jungkook had the biggest grin of victory on his face, as he removed his now soften length inside your pussy. You’re already passed out, so Jungkook took the time to clean both of you as he covered your body with clean sheets. Little did you know, everything was recorded, from the moment the two of you step in his room. Jungkook would surely play the video sometime to jerk on you, and maybe use it for blackmail if you started acting up. But for now, you don’t have to know anything, what the two of you have, the thing that he made you believe, is already enough for him, cause he succesfully tainted you.

[cashawselena]

[sunshinegirl29]

Petrichor

SO hi! This is the first smut I've written in 5 years. So I'm sorry if it's a little dodgy. Anyway, it was raining when I wrote this, hence the imagery!

Summary: A rainy day, coffee between friends leads to something more, but it's not always that simple with Spencer.

Pairings: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Word Count: 6.5k

Warnings: swearing, smut, alcohol.

I'd love to hear some feedback xo

-------

You learned in Art History class, that hands were the hardest thing for an artist to master.  His were slender and gentle; caressing the words on the page, brow pinched in concentration. His nails, trimmed, cuticles soft and small. That was Spencer, most things about him were put together and careful to a point.  He rubs the heel of one into the hollow of his eye, squints and continues to absorb the words of his novel like patterns on a lover’s skin.

A simple cough catches your attention and you blink slowly, coming to from your reverie.

“Are you okay?”

Alex Blake’s tone is soft and low. She’s gentle and warm, chocolate brown eyes swimming with concern.  An answer doesn’t come at first; what words would you choose? You couldn’t look her in the eye and call it what it was.

“Tired, you know? Tough case.”

Your words wither like dry leaves under her gaze. Alex you’d learnt early on, held them in high regard – the way they stretch and curl and hold more weight than you realise.  But she doesn’t push and squeezes your shoulder, before resting back against her seat.  You glance back toward Spencer once more.  His eyes closed, soft brown rivulets curl behind his ears, messy against the small pillow he never leaves home without.

A small breath hitches as you eye his collar, the usually tight purple tie is broken and free from the confines of the material.  It reveals the innocent edges of bare skin, and your stomach feels like a knot in a chain. The tighter it gets, the harder it is to take apart.  You allow the thoughts to flow unfiltered for a moment longer, wondering how he’d react to your touch, both palms pressed to his chest, your lips mapping a path of devotion on his skin.

Then the jet rumbles its warning and you breathe again. Slippery hands grip the sides of the seat and the jet tips, shaking the dredges of cold coffee from your abandoned mug.

The next day, it rained. You wake to the sound of it, watery fingertips tapping a beat on the conservatory roof; you’d fallen asleep there, drowning in dreams of soft touches and stuttering breaths.  You wipe sweat from your chest and pad on bare feet into the small kitchen, working through neglected pots and pans to find your Sunday morning mug teetering on the edge of the kitchen island. 

“There you are.” You hum smiling around the imperfect rim, inhaling the rich black coffee that had become a tradition over the last few months. You spend the next few hours, cleaning the skeletons of the last week off the floor; being away from your cosy suburban home most of the week left little time for housework and it was about time.

The kitchen was pristine by the time the sky had given way to heavy biblical rain; the windows misty with condensation.  It didn’t take long for the house to fill with the familiar aroma of freshly brewed coffee once more as you hum to the radio and sway in between sips.  The music trickles into something slower, sensual and you smooth your hands into your hair and remove the tie, letting it hang loose instead.  Hips sway in slick circles as you lean back into the counter, running your hand along its wood grain as if a broad back or the gentle slope of his neck.   The chain knot is back, low in your stomach, tightening with every move.  The island bites into your back as you slide across it, a hand ghosting the bare expanse of your leg and into the waist band of your shorts.  It’s slow at first, the image that comes; he’s sitting cross legged on the floor, books piled up around him and a discarded coffee in the wings.

 Spencer holds books like you imagine he’d hold a lover, careful but with meaning and unbridled need.  His soft fingers dance on the page, mirroring yours in short circles, short gasps as he finds a lead hidden within the letters.  He knocks a book with his foot, rearranging his position on the floor and the muscles in lean arms twist when he gets to his knees. Your own sock clad feet crush the rug beneath them as the feeling builds.  Spencer reaches for a new coffee, but jumps at the heat sending liquid down his chin. He wipes it from his lips with an index finger, dipping it into his mouth savouring its rich sweetness.  This image alone was enough to tip you over the edge, waves crash and ebb leaving you panting and spent on the kitchen floor.

It's then that the murderous cry of your cell phone shatters the post orgasm comfort, shocking you into rising from the floor on unsteady legs.  It’s screams for attention from the couch, buried in pillows and a neatly folded blanket that’s thrown to the floor in frustration.

“For god’s sake I—”

Hotch’s name lights up the screen and it’s like ice water down your back.

“Hello?” you cough, attempting to cover any signs of breathlessness but he doesn’t bother a greeting; “we have a case, local, bad – Spencer will pick you up on the way, be ready in an hour.”

In a world with boundaries, you could say no; that you spend sometimes fourteen-hour days, six days a week on cases and you were owed at least one day to rest. But the shining reward gives you pause at the entrance to your bedroom. Spencer will pick you up.  You dress and return to the bright and airy front room to pace in anticipation, the sweet delay.

 

Out the window you watch as rain rushes down the street, lifting leaves and litter from pregnant drains. They disappear as a black SUV pulls up, he’s early. You half expect him to blare the horn but he slips from the driver’s seat and runs up wet steps, sliding a little before coming to stop.  Greed urges you to answer the door, but you hold steady waiting patiently for him to knock – which he does, neat and direct.

The wind blows spatters of muddy water on the oak floors as you open the door. Spencer waits politely for invitation which you readily provide him, instinctually grabbing his bicep to shelter him from the pouring rain.

“Sorry—hi.” He stammers, gesturing at the puddle that follows him in like an obedient dog.

“It’s okay, it’s horrendous out there!” you huff a nervous laugh and twist back toward him, he’s closer than you’d anticipated and you have to look up to drink him in

His hair curls with rain, dripping onto the dark wool of his coat. His lips part and close slowly, as if wanting to confess a lie but nothing comes.  You swallow thickly, daring a look at his mouth for a needy second before coming back to his hazel eyes.  They hold a weight with an unknown name and dart away, the burgeoning anticipation ebbing slowly.

The growing silence lingers on for a few more seconds before he steps back, wiping both hands down his coat, looking anywhere but you.

“We have a case.” His voice ticks up and he coughs, wrapping those long fingers around his opposite wrist.

“Yeah, Hotch said.” You beckon him to the kitchen in an attempt to defuse the tension. “Know anything about it?” He crosses the room in two strides, the kitchen island a wedge between you.

The BAU had been your home for six months and after a few growing pains you fit in nicely, spending slow evenings in Penelope’s apartment and even began to get Aaron to smile now and again. Spencer though had been slow to trust, not that you blamed him but eventually he began to thaw. His shield of intelligence had melted into trickles of kindness that leaked into your life; he’d have your favourite mug filled with black coffee how you liked. After particularly hard cases he’d taken to sharing half his blanket and somehow a luxury pastry ended up on your breakfast plate before landing each time.

“Yeah, a home invasion homicide, mother and two children both dead. Did you know, the odds of being killed in your own home by a stranger are dependent on gender! With twenty one percent being men and only twelve percent being women.” Spencer smiles, in his element leaning into the counter. A heartbeat goes by before you note where he stands. Only an hour earlier you sat alone with fingers buried deep in your shorts, panting and writhing against the tile, all for him – its almost too much to bear.

 The carafe rattles imperceptibly against the mug, you fill it with sweet coffee for him without thinking;

“Are you alright?” it’s evident you can’t escape a profiler’s eye “if it’s what I said I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, the odds are—”

“It’s fine Spence, here you look like you need it.” You’re brutally aware that you’re rambling and he doesn’t miss a beat, but graciously doesn’t press any further. Instead, he takes a sip of the coffee, humming contentedly. The small noise starts a raging desire that burns through your blood.

“This is great coffee. You know, coffee is a language in itself...”

He walks around, coming to rest opposite you without the barrier of the island.  You’re drunk on the scent of damp clean hair and faint cologne, it’s a force you have no name for that fills your chest, fuelling the beat that matches the way panicked rain hits the windows behind your head.

“What’s it telling you?” You whisper, looking up into a blown-out gaze.

It was in your nature to burry intense feelings, but you wonder if he can see it all over your face, the pure naked wanting. 

Suddenly aware of his animal warmth much closer now. The knotted chain pulls tighter, burning low and you press your thighs together for any scrap of relief.  He doesn’t say anything and for a slow second you worry you’ve misread the situation. But any reservations die as Spencer reaches for the mug in your hands with the soft fingers you’d mused over so much in the last few days. He takes it from your hand, placing it on the sink behind you absentmindedly.

““Spence…” you plead, body trembling as his gaze covers your face, asking...

The first brush against you is chaste, a whisper of a kiss that barely touches the skin, it’s almost as if he breathes across your upper lip. He pulls back, barely, just enough to lay a question between you.

“Please.”

You step into him as the first rolls of thunder come in. Damp ropes of hair drag across your face and you can’t hold back from touching it, pushing it back like water. You anchor yourself to it when he kisses you again, just as brief but more firm, lingering against your mouth.  

“Is this okay?”

His question is lost on your lips as you grasp the damp collar of his coat and pull him down toward you, swallowing his yelp with a deep kiss; it feeds the hunger for him and you can’t help but moan into his mouth, savouring the sweetness.

You’re nothing but him, drowning in the press of his lips, so soft and strong as you lick into his mouth, surprised by the strength he uses to lift you up onto the biting edge of the counter.

His fingers arch around the side of your neck bringing you back to his mouth like a man starved; your free hand that isn’t wound in his curls sears a path along his neck, diving into his shirt.  He’s muttering something, you suspect a flustered fact about pathogens and almost laugh, but you can only feel the syllables of hot and wet before he jerks so violently your lips wrench away from his.

You both freeze. One hand in his hair, the other on his chest, his own still grasp the swell of your ass.

“I don’t normally do this.” He stammers again, taking a shaky step backwards and you mourn the loss of him. The heat that simmered low between your legs is doused in shame.

“Don’t, don’t do tha---” 

Your words die in your throat as his cell phone screams from his coat pocket, sending him away from you, a crease of concern between his brows.

“Okay, we’re leaving now. Thanks Morgan.”

Spencer glances at you, as if waiting for a scolding – it doesn’t come.  You just sigh, letting him sweat in silence; his mouth is swollen, both cheeks flushed in an uncharacteristic bloom of colour. You gaze at him despite yourself, a sad smile passing your lips.

“Spence..” you press, striding forward to meet him.

You reach for him, tugging on the sleeve of his damp coat like a child.  He shakes his head ever so slightly, but grasps your fingers gently in his own anyway.  

“I’m sorry.” He mumbles into your hair, releasing your hand with a small squeeze.

“Are you..” you sigh, not bothering to wait for an answer before heading out and into the rain.

>

 

 

By the time you arrive back at Quantico rage had made its home in your gut.  Rage at him, because how dare he kiss you out the blue, in your own home and run off like he’d been burned. JJ is the first to notice when you speed from the car, barely putting it in park before slamming the door and standing at her side.   

“Everything, okay?” She whispers, eyeing you and a jittery Spencer who’s pointedly staring anywhere else. 

“You know, working on a Sunday sucks,” You huff, glancing at her before turning toward him  “and the middle of the day too, it’s almost as if you thought you’d get one thing, but ended up being sorely disappointed.”

A beat of dead silence passes but no one gets to push the subject. Hotch appears from the SUV with a peaky looking Rossi at his side, the case had been brutal and a complete bust – two children and a mother dead with a missing top suspect and a suspicious Grandfather to boot.  No one liked going home empty handed and it showed.

“Thank you everyone, I’m sorry to call you in on your day off. Finish off your paperwork and take tomorrow to yourselves. You earned it.” you almost hugged him, the ever stoic Aaron Hotchner, but instead followed the rest of the team inside toward Penelope who waits with freshly baked goods and an award winning smile.

“Hello my heroes! I bare the sweetest of treats and that’s just on the plate--”  she laughs, cut off but Aaron who pats her gently before swiping a Danish and disappearing into his office. Penelope’s keen eyes miss nothing – not the way Spencer whips past the others, muttering about callings his mother, not the way your own eyes follow him until he disappears.

“Hey gorgeous, cinnamon roll?” Penny smiles and you look at her at last, gratefully taking the gift – a sweet cushion to the bitter blow of Spencer’s rejection.

“I know it’s none of my business” Penny starts, walking toward your office side by side. You shoot her a withering look, knowing that it wouldn’t matter if it was her business or not – Penelope needed to know things.  But in a painful reality, there was nothing to know and there never would be, not now, not after this.

“Working on a Sunday.. not what I had planned! Thanks for the treats, I’ll see you.” You smile, putting on the brightest facade of happiness before fleeing into the unpersecuted safety of your office.

_

On the last day of the month you take the train downtown. The sharp November air slices the bare skin of your legs as you head into the depths of the city; the Saturday evening buzz is strong and floods of intoxicated partygoers filter in and out of clubs on each side of the street.  The claustrophobia thins out as you approach the affluent section of the city; harsh neon lights fade into comforting warm candlelight, they reflect gently against the black gloss of Emily’s hair as she stands in the sheltered awning of the Gilded Lilly.  You linger under the guise of adjusting your shoes and observe her for a moment; a lighter sparks in the dark, long inhale, a long exhale – the first curl of smoke, grey against black.

“Over here!” She calls your name, waving a gentle hand to beckon you forward.

She looks different, her cheeks are pink and her dark hair falls softly around her face, flushed and girlish and completely alive,

“You’re wearing a dress?!” You grin at her not so typical outfit and squeeze at her hand, readily accepting the invitation inside.

The polarising temperature is gratefully welcomed and you can’t repress a comforting hum as feeling comes back to your toes and hands. Emily chatters absentmindedly, pulling you by the wrist toward the bar where an opulently dressed man prepares a drink with loving precision and for a moment panic sets in.  Emily, seemingly reading your mind, wraps her arm around your waist and huffs a laugh.

“These are on Rossi, this is his bar after all.”

 

A rich green path of marble leads you toward a large backroom where luscious velveteen couches surround solid oak tables and glistening chandeliers ricochet off art lined walls. You catch Rossi’s eye across the room and he smiles proudly.

“Kiddo! You made it!” he smells of faint cigars and expensive cologne when he envelopes you in a warm hug and tugs you down into the seat next to him. 

It takes you less than seconds to deduce they’d been drinking long before you arrived – Morgan’s laugh carried louder and farther than usual, thick and low with drink. JJ and Emily snuggled into the rounded corner, laughing with Garcia around elaborate cocktails. Rossi and Aaron, older and more demure than their younger counterparts are blurred slightly at the edges, both follow your eyes and catch them when you turn.

“Where’s Spencer?”

The anger had simmered comfortably under the surface for weeks since that day in your kitchen, your relationship never fitting back into the boundaries of friendship. Penelope tried her best to prod at the wound, egging for blood but nothing came, you couldn’t admit the rejection even to her.  The rest of the team sensed the mounting tension, but you waved away their concern with a decorative excuse and it seemed to placate them. 

“I’m not sure he’s coming kid..” Rossi sighs, patting your shoulder as if he knows something he shouldn’t.  “come on now, have some fun. Too much thinking isn’t good for anyone. Right Aaron?” Dave laughs, sliding a fresh cocktail to join the one Morgan and Emily bought you. 

Before long three more empty glasses join the others and it had started to get rowdy. The copious amounts of liquor had bounced straight from your head to your bladder, it forces you out of your seat and you climb awkwardly over a blushing Aaron who pointedly looks anywhere but the low neck and short skirt of your new dress. It’s then a sharp choking cough breaks the mounting tension;

“Spence..” you breathe, scrambling away from Aaron who’s face blanches like sour milk.

 He’s beautiful and still, spots of light rain litter his lambs wool coat like glass. 

“Spencer!” Garcia squeals, and at that moment you could have kissed her. Spencer's expression cracks open, a rare smile and even rarer hug.

You blink at that, still stunned slightly dumb at the sight of him.

“Good to see you kid! Let’s get you a drink!” Rossi cheers and then they’re gone, bundled off toward the distant bar.  

You stand silently for a minute, looking toward the hallway but turn at the sound of your name.

“So, are you going to tell us why pretty boy looks like he’s about to spontaneously combust every time you’re within fifty feet?” Morgan grins, smirking round a spectacular old fashioned.

You find yourself flinching at your own words, teeth clattering against the cold hard lie of;

“We had a disagreement that’s all. It’s nothing.”

 

It never really went away. You’d deliberately ignored the symptoms, but days and weeks went by and your craving for him never abated.  Despite the disappointment of his rejection you’re happy he’s here and begin to relax.

It’s smiles all around when you deposit drinks to each member of the team in turn, including Spencer who’s shed himself of his coat, revealing a grey herringbone cardigan and white shirt.   He doesn’t seem to notice you, he’s rambling about the origins of a Bloody Mary with unbridled passion and your heart melts like the ice in his glass.   Whether it’s the heightened buzz of multiple cocktails or not you decide it’s a question for tomorrow and a squeeze his arm;

It happens in slow motion, the way Spencer jumps.  The action sends the drink in your hands backwards and all over the front of your dress.

“What the hell?!” you gasp and stagger backward, taking a bunch of napkins from Emily who’s wide eyed along with the rest of the team who’ve lapped into uncomfortable silence.  

Spencer stammers, gawping like a fish out of water, flapping about the mess on the table which he wipes erratically without sparing your wet dress and thunderous expression a second glance.

Aaron and Rossi, no longer blurred by liquor mutter to each other in your peripheral.

“Care to tell me what the hell that was about?”  You’d had enough, weeks of icing each other out you thought he’d be receptive to your warmth but he says nothing instead.  You almost laugh;

“A man with an IQ of 187 and nothing to say. Typical.” You hiss, slamming down the glass, splashing the residual whisky onto his jumper.

Aaron stands, stepping toward you with a pleading expression and his jacket.  You ignore him, staring at Spencer who still doesn’t meet your eyes.

“Spence..” you plead and reach out but stop half way, thinking better of it. He seems to relax for a split second but visibly tenses when Aaron wraps his suit jacket around your shoulders.

You’re grateful for it’s warmth against your skin and step into it, pulling the inky black lapels around your exposed chest gratefully. 

“Come on. Let it go. I’ll call you a cab.” 

“Yeah.” Spencer snaps, his hazel eyes cutting, looks you and Aaron up and down “back to her place right?”

A collective intake of breath.  A sharp snap of heels against marble. You’re dragging him off the chair by his cardigan, nails dig into the lean flesh of his arm.  Rossi’s protests and Garcia’s high pitch yells are ignored and disappear as you shove a squirming Spencer out into street.

The sharp winter air ruffles Spencer’s hair, his back to you, pacing.  Your arms folded against the cold, stoic and thunderous.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” the echo of your breath comes out in plumes of white, hard and fast.  Spencer paces, large fingers curling into hard fists at his side.

“With me?” he squeaks, spinning to face you, honeyed eyes tear you in two . It’s almost a relief, a weight lifted as he finally sees you, holds your gaze for the first time in a month;

“You should look in the mirror.” He spits, the alcohol on his breath fanning your face; “throwing yourself over our boss because you can’t take rejection!”

It’s your turn to say nothing.  You do nothing but shake like a trapped bird, winged and frantic. Whatever your face conveys, Spencer’s is stiff, a stoic mask giving nothing away.  

“Yeah” you scoff, a wave of rage rising from your stomach hot and forceful “I see.”

How dare he make such a foul insinuation. You loved Aaron but wouldn’t cross that line, but Spencer didn’t need to know that.  It didn’t take a genius, clearly to realise what was really going on here and you almost laugh in his face.   

“See what exactly?” you’ve peaked his interest but hold steady.

He’s so close now, so close you don’t feel like one person anymore. Standing in place in the cold, gravitating toward his warmth.  Brown rivulets fall in pieces around his face like a shield. The heady smell of faint cologne and black coffee fill your nostrils when you close in on him, ignoring the blaring of sirens and faint chatter from across the street.

“It’s funny. Your tongue in my mouth didn’t seem like rejection to me. But who cares?” You breathe in shakily, emboldened by a heady cocktail of liquor and adrenaline grab his forearm. “I’m going home with Aaron, right Spence?”

“Right..” Spencer breathes and steps in close, the ice in his eyes seem to crack imperceptibly.

“He’s going to touch me. Is that okay with you?”  Spencer’s breath hitches as your voice purrs between you. He’s not running and the low throb between your legs begs for more.

“He’ll lay me down.” You continue, trailing numb fingers up his arms to come rest at his neck revelling in the way he trembles.  “he’ll taste me.”  Spencer moans; a breathy thing, barely heard, barely there. You sway, overtaken by the pleasure of such an innocent sound. 

  Spencer stutters your name more earnest, more desperate, and you aren’t even pretending to argue anymore. You lick your lips and almost catch his chin with your tongue and he moans again, breathy and begging. Begging for something, begging for you. 

“And you know what?” you giggle now, pressing flush against him and feel just how much this is effecting him too. “He might just make me cum..”

The remnants of your laugh drown in his kiss; it’s flooded with frustration, hungry and wanton and the confidence of it knocks you back. He tastes like whisky and something sweet and soft that echoes through your body like a hiss down your spine. Moaning into it you know he feels it in his tongue where it strokes against yours.  He snakes a long arm around your lower back and swings you closer, his other hand continues its path up your neck to grasp your jaw and it takes all your self control not to drop to your knees in public.   As if reading your mind, Spencer pulls away, flushed and panting and hails a cab;

“Where are we going?” You laugh, a breathy wisp like sound but don’t get answer until he rambles your address, shoving a bunch of tens to the cab driver and suddenly you’re back where it all started. 

 

You fall together in the dark, grappling with his coat and your shoes that he bends chivalrously to undo; the simple act elicits a moan from your lips that stops Spencer in his tracks and you can’t help but clench your thighs together for any scrap of friction.  Spencer isn’t unaffected by the wanton noise but surprises you with a smug chuckle and the slow trail of his fingers against the pad of your foot as he divests you of the stiletto.  It’s downright perverse, the jolt of pleasure that runs through your body, an erogenous zone only he would remember – damn that eidetic memory.

“Tell me” Spencer breathes out finally, adjusting his slacks with a pained grimace

“God, Spence..” you reach down and card a hand through his hair, suddenly shy “taste me..please.”

Spencer’s hands swallow your thighs, pushing your dress to sit around your waist.  Your pulse pounds with anticipation and nerves, but you don’t miss his reassuring smile.  Your nod of permission is all but lost against the wall when he dips a finger into the silky fabric of your underwear, just grazing you to pull the scrap of material to pool at your feet. 

“Oh...my god.” You cry out and pull in a breath at the first wet press of his soft mouth, you’d spent more time than you’d admit out-loud staring at his lips – round coffee cups and pens, imagining this very moment.  What you didn’t imagine is him being so damn good, the flat swipes of his tongue just where you need, the desperate sounds that vibrate against your clit.  It doesn’t take much time to push you toward the edge, teetering – but his strokes turn languid, earning him a choking groan.

“Please, don’t..” you moan and grasp and the hair you can reach, desperate to put him back to work “don’t stop now..”  a small wave of dread follows the memory him a few weeks earlier.

“I—I’m not.” He begins, you know him enough to see the nerves bubbling up amongst his arousal and step forward, reaching for the top of his waistband. Spencer’s throat jiggles, swallowing a squeak as you slip a hand into the fabric and choke on a gasp at what you find;

“Jesus...” He’s rock hard and thicker than you expected. It seems to embolden him, your reaction and his awkwardness is stifled to a small laugh that morphs into a groan of pleasure when you wrap a hand around him.  He whines, bucking against your hand and it makes you weak, the whimpers coming from his perfect lips fuel to the fire.

“I’m, not going to last.”  Spencer shimmies out your grasp, haloed by the moonlight pouring in from the uncovered window, tall and beautifully undone.

The first time you’d touched each other it’d been desperate, the way you came together , grappling for each other.  You remember his face before he kissed you for the first time, much like the one he wears now, slinking forward, capturing your lips in a heady kiss that doesn’t stop until you hit the edge of your unmade bed.  In another world, you’d be embarrassed at the chaos that hints to your unravelling but he’s turning you round to straddle him, both hands working expertly at the material of your dress. He’s impossibly hard and groans deeper than you’ve ever heard him and it shoots a bolt of pleasure so deep you ground down against him, ripping at the material of his shirt to marvel him.  Spencer wasn’t like Derek, but god your imagination never put the pieces together quite like this.

“You’re so damn beautiful” you gasp, not giving him time to respond more than a muffled groan as you shove him into the bed. You don’t wait for him to respond, a slave to the throb between your legs, it takes seconds to strip him of all barriers.  Spencer says nothing, his mind seems blank for the first time, you watch his honeyed eyes commit you to memory forever, the swell of your breasts, the taste of your skin and the intoxicating wetness that drenches his lap.

“Please, I need you..”  you beg, as if he has control, as if you’re not just seconds away from sinking onto him.

Your gasp is strangled when he juts upwards, burying himself to the hilt. You almost don’t recognise yourself the way you cry in between dirty kisses that cover his neck, something that Morgan would definitely pick up on later – the thought of everyone witnessing your claim on him, the way you’ve made him your own sparks something like wildfire in your gut it drives your forward and you meet him in sloppy bobs of your hips.

The action sends Spencer reeling, his cock slipping easily out of you and before you grieve the loss of pleasure he’s looming above you,  messy and wild and so fucking gorgeous it takes tremendous self control not to cry right there. 

“Is this okay?” Spencer asks, nuzzling his question into your neck, smoothing the tip of his nose up and under your ear, to place a short kiss. 

“God, yes please.” You gasp at the bite of pleasure soaked pain when he stretches you open, tortuously slow. 

Spencer was a late bloomer, you knew that, but at this moment, when his expert fingers deftly catch the edge of your clit you’d never believe it.  The exquisite friction causes you to whimper into his ear, tugging a little too hard on his hair that fans your face as he thrusts.  You’re stuttering something akin to a plea, but he doesn’t give in that easily.

“Use your words.”  Your brain short circuits for a second, watching him draw back from your neck, pupils blown out with lust “ communicate, that’s a good girl.”

Any words you’d conjured up in your head die in the water, engulfed in moan that you’re sure three houses down could hear.  Spencer folds then,  swallowing your moans in a bruising kiss.

“Make me cum Spence”  you purr, rifling through his hair with one hand, pawing at his clenching stomach with the other.  He rewards you with rumbling growl, his fingers finding your clit without effort, tight rapid circles that have you bucking into his thrusts, pushing the both of you closer to the edge. 

You can’t stop it, you don’t even want to, for once in your life you let go. It crests like a sea, flooding through you and Spencer who growls and bites down on the gentle slope of your shoulder. 

Spencer collapses against you, sweating and gasping in what you think is pleasure but you quickly realise he’s laughing.

“What’s so funny Mr 187?”  you can only guess, but ever the educator, doesn’t leave you in the dark for long, rolling away he snuggles into your side. 

“I can’t believe it.” He sighs, lush with the heavy weight of post orgasm sleep “I wanted to do that for so long..” 

You can feel his nervousness in the beat of your silence and have to keep yourself from squealing in excitement like a love struck teen.  You turn slowly, eyes shining with unshed emotion that you know he can see laid bare.

“Me too..” you sigh, entangling his fingers into yours, rolling over to hook his arm across your stomach “you’re so damn good. For a late bloomer..” you snigger, erupting into giggles when he nips at the back of your neck.  You clench your thighs at the pleasure and can’t ignore the hard weight of his already hard cock at your back, but instead follow Spencer into sleep, cradling each other like sunken lovers on the ocean floor. 

When the sun drenches your bedroom in hazy light do you let yourself remember, grinning as the weight of Spencer Reid’s naked body wriggles against your own.  You catch yourself, just for a second, imagining a distant future of endless morning of this, but your dreaming is eventually interrupted by the rapid pulsing of a vibrating cell phone.  Lurching your heavy body awkwardly across the bed you pick through discarded clothes and answer the 8th missed call from Aaron Hotchner.

“Reid, where are you? We have a case.”

 A beat passes, a slow second of horrendous silence. You’d answered Spencer’s phone by mistake. Letting out a deep breath, resigned to the fact this is how they’d all find out if they hadn’t guessed already.

“Sorry Hotch. We’ll be there.”

With that, without saying another word you hang up and throw the phone into the corner of the room like it burnt. 

“I hope you’re prepared to answer so many questions about my sexual performance when Garcia gets hold of this!”  Spencer laughs, and you debate giving him blue balls for not coming to your rescue sooner.  But the near constant buzzing of your own phone on the other side of the bed tells you in no uncertain terms that Garcia had been privy to your very brief phone call with Hotch, who undoubtedly told them all to behave but you know better. 

Later, in the crisp afternoon air do you hook Spencer’s fingers in your own, a small gesture of solidarity and intimacy you can tell he greatly appreciated. From the end of the hallway, you spot the team who twist in a hilarious synchronicity. 

Spencer squeezes your hand and you bring them up between you kissing interlocked fingers.

Art history class taught you that hands were the hardest thing to master, but you’d hold his forever.

[safety-pin-punk]

Punk History Resources: Vol. 1

This is a compilation of resources found and recommended by various alternative bloggers, each of whom are credited for their contributions. This started because I was getting SO MANY asks about resources such as videos, books, and websites to use to learn about punk history. Admittedly, my own list isn't that long, so I thought it was best to reach out to some others and share their knowledge with everyone. So thank you again to everyone who helped out with this!!

@raggedyfink @lovintheaesthetic @punk-patches @my-chemical-ratz

YOUTUBE:

Punk/Goth Docs Playlist on Youtube (77 Videos) (raggedyfink)

1991 The Year Punk broke (lovintheaesthetic)

She's Real (Worse Than Queer) (lovintheaesthetic)

Don't Need You, The Herstory of Riot Grrrl (lovintheaesthetic)

The Long Queer History of Punk (lovintheaesthetic)

The very Black History of Punk Music (lovintheaesthetic)

Punk's Not Dead (lovintheaesthetic)

BOOKS:

Phantoms the Rise of La Deathrock (raggedyfink)

Too Tough to Love by Roxy Ramone (raggedyfink)

I Slept With Joey Ramone by Mickey Leigh (raggedyfink)

Please Kill Me, The Uncensored Oral History of Punk Rock (punk-patches & lovintheaesthetic)

Encyclopedia of Punk (punk-patches)

The Day the Country Died: A History of Anarcho-Punk, 1980-1984 (my-chemical-ratz)

The Heebie-Jeebies at CBGB's: A Secret History of Jewish Punk (my-chemical-ratz)

Sellout: The Major-Label Feeding Frenzy That Swept Punk, Emo, and Hardcore (lovintheaesthetic & my-chemical-ratz)

Tranny: Confessions of Punk Rock's Most Infamous Anarchist Sellout (my-chemical-ratz)

Punk Rock: An Oral History (my-chemical-ratz)

Girls to the Front: The True Story of the Riot Grrrl Revolution (my-chemical-ratz)

Queercore: Queer Punk Media Subculture (my-chemical-ratz)

Queercore: How to Punk a Revolution: An Oral History (my-chemical-ratz)

Spider-Punk: Banned in D.C.(this doesnt have anything to do with history but i love spider punk so) (my-chemical-ratz)

MOVIES / DOCUMENTARIES:

The Punk Singer (punk-patches)

Queercore: How to Punk a Revolution (punk-patches)

Punk's Not Dead (punk-patches)

Pansy Division: Life in a Gay Rock Band (punk-patches)

Queercore: How To Punk a Revolution (my-chemical-ratz)

Afropunk (my-chemical-ratz)

Punk in Africa (my-chemical-ratz)

A Band Called Death (my-chemical-ratz)) (link courtesy of @wrench-p, but is unavailable to watch in the US))

ARTICLES:

(some of these are found on JSTOR, but you can sign up for a free 100 articles per month)

Muslim Punk in an Alt-Right Era (my-chemical-ratz)

A History of Punk (my-chemical-ratz)

Jews, Punk and the Holocaust: From the Velvet Underground to the Ramones: The Jewish-American Story (my-chemical-ratz)

What is Punk and Why Did It Scare People So Much? (my-chemical-ratz)

An Account of a South African Punk Rock Music Collection (my-chemical-ratz)

Queer As Punk: A Guide To LGBTQIA+ Punk (my-chemical-ratz)

Did Punk Matter?: Analyzing the Practices of a Youth Subculture During the 1980s (my-chemical-ratz)

ZINES:

(some may not be *about* history, but they’re a huge part of it!)

Punk Planet archive (my-chemical-ratz & safety-pin-punk)

Queer Zine archive (I personally like the anon boy collection haha) (my-chemical-ratz)

Archive.org in general has a lot of zines :) (my-chemical-ratz)

ETC:

(These aren’t about punk history itself but could be helpful in learning about the politics that go with being punk)

A History of Punk from 1976-78: A Free Online Course from the University of Reading (safety-pin-punk)

Punk History Reading List (safety-pin-punk)

Essays about socialism (my-chemical-ratz)

Leftism 101 (my-chemical-ratz)

Rights as an American protester (my-chemical-ratz)

Social justice classes (I’m really excited to go through these!!) (my-chemical-ratz)

Stamped (my-chemical-ratz)

How To Be An Anti-Racist (my-chemical-ratz)

Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm (my-chemical-ratz)

I would love to make a Vol. 2 post at some point in the future, so if you have resources and want to share, PLEASE message me!!