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This might seem like an "old man yells at cloud" situation, but it's just wild growing up and being told how dangerous distracted driving is - how, at highway speeds, you can traverse the length of a football field (100 yards, 91 meters) in a matter of seconds - how one split second sending a text while driving could result in a potential fatal crash, and then getting on the road as a driver and being surrounded by billboards. Their entire purpose is to catch one's attention, so they're lining major roads, which tend to be highways. How is it that you're told how important it is to never be distracted while driving, but still being advertised to?
At best, this type of advertising is an eyesore to pedestrians and motorists and a general waste of electricity to light it, and at worst, it is an active danger considering they are there to advertise and therefore, must catch people's attention.
I'm not even against advertising in theory, but this particular mode bothers me so much and I hate how pervasive it is - especially in large cities or highways.
#politics#i don't know much about são paulo banning marketing billboards but on paper i want that here in the USA#as a motorist it at best just makes me more anxious driving in those larger cities because i want to FOCUS ON THE ROAD#and passing 5000 billboards per mile isn't helping actually!#i've gotten good at filtering that out of my FOV but it's still fucking exhausting lol#i especially hate those modern electric billboards. despise them actually#i am aware that advertising is a critical aspect to business management in some cases...#...but it shouldn't risk the safety of the populous for you to advertise to them and i see things like billboards as risking safety...#...i feel similarly about online advertising in that so much of it risks internet user's safety...#...such as flashing ads online which risk triggering epileptic seizures in light/photo-sensitive folks#distracted driving (texting): NO >:( || distracted driving (being advertised to): YAYYYY :D#i've been driving on my own for a few years now and i've been thinking about this for ENTIRELY too long
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s4 episode 13 thoughts
before we begin: i’m gonna be upfront with you. this is another episode i did not like. this was scully’s 3, if you catch my meaning.
but i made a post announcing that i did not like this episode after a mere 10 minutes of viewing, and received some comments saying that others were big fans. as always, this is a place where i welcome discussion! PLEASE tell me what you think. you can try to talk me into liking it! tell me how you see it, and how it makes sense to you, and why you enjoyed it; maybe you’ll sway me. maybe not. maybe i’m cool and different for not liking things other people like, or maybe i’m basic because other people don’t like it as well. i have no frame of reference, which makes this blog so fun!
frankly, there are some things that i as a viewer just don’t want to see. i am not a fan of misogyny or watching THE hetbait of all time kiss other people.
here we are! so, i have been informed that in the timeline of canon, this episode i’m about to watch actually takes place BEFORE the last one. which i have noted. although it will be hard to distract myself from knowing what i do know now, i’ll do my best.
(author's note: yeah i see why that clarification is important)
okay, the episode description. mulder? vacationing? i don’t believe it for a second.
oh god, i don’t wanna see scully pine for some random guy. maybe there will just be an intellectual attraction here. i just don’t want to see it. i’m not sorry!!!!
okay. let’s go. still not believing in vacation mulder, but i’ll give it my best.
some guy named jerse is getting divorced. wait. wait no. i recognize that name from a fanfic i read. NO.
i couldn’t remember what the hell this dude’s name was (jerve? juss?) because he only popped up BRIEFLY in a fanfic i read that had no seasoning relevant warnings. but because of this, i know what he is here to do. DAMN IT. let this be a lesson: read fic that is marked by the season!!!!
jerse is getting divorced. he is kinda handsome, i won’t lie. but he looks like a sick freak and he’s being weird to this bartender
oh god, he has kids. scully STAY AWAY FROM THIS MAN- I’M NOT GONNA ASK AGAIN. pulling out a photo of him and the kids at the bar. a pathetic individual.
he burned himself out of the picture with a cigarette?? this is clearly well-adjusted behavior
now he’s drunk outside a tattoo shop. in the rain. looking at a tattoo of a cartoon woman. and now he’s home? he has a tattoo he doesn’t seem to remember. ah. the cartoon woman. drink can do this to a man.
now he’s crawling on all fours? what do you want me to do about that.
gooood, i know what’s coming because of that fanfic that accidentally spoiled me, and i’m gonna be so pissed. has my hater energy been distracting you lately? is this blog still enjoyable? be honest. but not too honest. i will cry.
mulder and scully are talking to someone about a UFO sighting, someone who is talking about explosions but no sound. she’s busy looking at the vietnam war memorial. NO there’s a little car that someone left for their dead brother :( she picks up a leaf and takes it with her…. i bet she is thinking about her own brothers and the sister she lost
back to jerse. he’s on the phone trying to sell stocks to a random woman who is fighting with her kids.
oh. a disembodied voice calls him a loser. well, do it again for me. so he’s hearing things, including laughter.
OH no….. he’s blaming some random woman in the office for calling him a loser and confronting her. she was LITERALLY BUSY! leave her alone. he’s throwing stuff around. very professional (heavy on the /s). and he gets sent home which is good because i was scared, they were scared, we were all scared.
scully is in mulder’s office, holding his name tag. awwww.
oh, my suspicions about mulder were correct- he did not want to go on vacation, but he was forced to! he is taking piles of x files with him. and he’s suspicious that they’re trying to get rid of him.
“gotta pay the rent” <- your dad had like 3 fucking houses i do not believe that for a SECOND you need this job to put food on the table mulder
“why don’t i have a desk?” she asks <- LMAOOO... i miss you s1 scully desk we saw that singular time that i always assumed still existed but i guess no longer does
(this seemed like a funny throwaway line to me at first, hence my lmao, but i later understood that this line was said with a Seriousness. however, i like to leave things as they were so you can really get a feel for my mind, all the wrong conclusions included)
AWWW he says we can get a desk and they can be really close and we can play battleship... LMAOOO i think….? i can’t tell if he’s being genuine and wants to help, or catty because he’s pissed he has to take a vacation
OH! he’s pissed. what does he want her to keep an eye on? “that contact that we met last night at the wall, who had the distinction of being present for a first- that being you abandoning me during questioning” OHHHH he went there!!! damn! slim to no empathy when he is in alien mode.
“in the future, i’ll make sure that all those people being interviewed provide you with a multimedia laser show to keep your interest maintained” <- WHAT THE FUCK MULDER? DO I LAUGH OR WANT TO SLAP YOU? she looks so gagged. clearly something is on her MIND, you insensitive dolt.
so this guy they were talking to is named pudovkin, he’s from russia, and he has a doctorate in astronautical engineering, which is a term i have never heard before.
scully still seems distracted… but she asks if pudovkin’s reports on UFO crashes are for sale. which mulder confirms, but they are at a high price.
mulder tries to give her the assignment, and he made all these arrangements, but she says NO!!! LMAO (?) she says that russian guy they spoke with was recounting the plot of a cartoon. okay, queen is well-versed in her cartoons! i see you
oh my god, what is the tone of this episode…?
“so you’re refusing an assignment based on the adventures of moose and squirrel” “refusing an assignment? that makes it sound like you’re my superior”
oh, that pissed him off… “do what you want, don’t go to philadelphia, but let me remind you that i worked my ass off to get these files reopened. you were just assigned. this work is my life” <- HEY BUCKO. let us take a deep and calming breath. let us choose our words with kindness when talking to our friends.
“and it’s become mine” <- oh my GOD... that motif.... her getting pulled further and further into this...
so i can tell you right now, with confidence: i do not like this episode. why is he being mean? she is clearly thinking about something. i thought he was teasing at first, but clearly now he isn’t. if i were him i would say “hey, you seem distracted. is everything alright?” IS THAT HARD? IS THAT SO FUCKING HARD TO DO?
and it would still make for compelling TV!!! hey listen, i hear you saying "if they didn't have problems, there would be no plot" to which i say: there has been plenty of plot in the past when they have treated each other with kindness, no?
she says she is losing sense of her life- “this isn’t about you, mulder, or maybe it is in an indirect way”- and he says “maybe it’s good that we get away from each other for a while” <- WHAT IS GOING ON???
he seems so shocked to hear that the x files aren’t her whole life……… baby boy, let’s use context clues... yes, he is in ahab mode....
he says he’s going on a spiritual journey to discover something about himself…. and she sets the leaf she found from before on his desk. hmm. hmmmm.
back to jerse. he’s on the phone again. begging for his job back. doesn’t seem to be going well. oh my gosh, he just beat the phone. smashed it over and over again. i am frightened.
the evil tattoo is taunting him. so he is crawling on all fours to see if it’s coming from the floor below, which simply has a lady and some birds! those poor birds!
(is this tattoo supposed to be a representation of mental illness? if so, which one? is it supposed to be insecurity? placed upon him by society? toxic masculinity?)
he’s talking to some missionaries who are trying to tell him that his downstairs neighbor is not involved in a plot to drive him insane…..
oh my god he broke into the bird lady’s apartment. OH MY GOD???????????
soundtrack this episode is killer though, i’ll give it that. put more music in my monster of the week content.
oh my god he’s like. dragging something. hard to tell because the screen is almost ENTIRELY BLACK. yes. he is putting a box in an incinerator. that presumably contains bird lady. real charming fellow, this jerse.
(this is kinda like if little shop of horrors involved a tattoo instead of a plant. the tattoo says no one will hurt him again. sure, man. i’ve seen how that musical ends)
mulder is wet. on the road, outside his car. very wet. calling to see how scully is doing. he wants to know where she is!!!! but there is no answer.
scully is in philly, looking at the files about the russian space guy, watching him. she’s tailing him now into some convenience store. he is fighting loudly in russian and exchanging money……. hmm. that’s not promising.
is he going into the tattoo shop? so goes the scully, in that case.
oh no. jerse is in there. he’s asking a separate russian guy who is the tattoo artist to cover up the cartoon tattoo….
oh god, he gets scully involved. “you like this, on his arm?” and now it’s winking. it has changed its design.
she says the coloring is nice (very thoughtful response to being sucked into a strange situation), and the russian tattoo guy is talking about how he learned how to tattoo in prison, while the creepy voice in jerse’s head is commenting on his new undying love for scully. but the actual russian space guy is in the back!!!
god, i don’t want to watch thiiiiiiis. but i must. i am a journalist, after all. she lies and says she’s visiting her aunt. and that she wishes she was impulsive sometimes.
she says she’s leaving- but he gives her his number. god, is this gonna be a multi-episode thing???
OH MY GOD, MULDER IS CALLING FROM GRACELAND “i’m at that special place and i wanted to share it with you…. did you know elvis bought all of his furniture in just thirty minutes?”
wait. hold on. that’s cute. he wanted to share it with her. but also how DID he know where she was? it’s their usual spot… “i knew you wouldn’t abandon me” <- AWWW why were you mean earlier!!!!! you are being sweet now :(
(again, i ask: what IS the tone of this episode?)
she says there’s no case, no x file, the russian guy is involved in gangs and fraud and whatnot. she's handing it over to the philly bureau and that is that.
she is very pissed that he is ordering her around as always (well, i support that!) and he pulls his “what, do you have a date or something?” card. and then CONSPICUOUS SILENCE.
oh my god he’s STUTTERING “you’re-you’re kidding” (he sadly returns to graceland and makes some elvis moves) (we can hear the sound of his heart breaking)
jerse’s tattoo is still talking to him while scully looks at his business card. she says her flight is cancelled and that she can pick him up!!! oh my god. oh my gooood.
jerse is huffing his cigarette and also trying to burn out the tattoo with it. more concerning behavior. it's like when seymour throws the rat poison in audrey ii.
the jehovah’s witnesses are strategically knocking on the door of the now dead bird lady. and scully is here with jerse. she’s entering his apartment.
you know what? this motherfucker looks like jeremy jordan. just an observation. sing, newsie boy.
she’s saying she doesn’t go out much…. but she noticed he’s bleeding. and also she says she’s a doctor. feels like that is relevant information to reveal before a date. don’t you want to know what a potential date does before you go out with them? well, i guess that is highlighting her desire to be impulsive.
oh god, she also finds the photo of him and the kids…. while he’s in the bathroom bandaging his wounds.
she wants to go to the crummy bar??? okay. get out your inner rebellion i guess.
he says that this is a good place to go when you’re down, because everyone here looks like they have worse problems than him. fair enough. except for also NOT fair enough... because he killed a woman!
scully says she goes around in a circle when an authority figure comes into her life, and part of her wants it, needs the approval, but then…
(it seems she is making a pointed reference to mulder here...? is that what he is to her? an authority figure?)
now she’s talking about her dad…. she would sneak out of the house and smoke the cigarettes. yes, i remember this from beyond the sea!!!! she did this because she knew that if he found out he would kill her.
he says the tattoo marked him never going back. SHE TRIES TO SEE IT AND HE GRABS HER???????
what the fuck what the FUCK. are we going to witness violence.
SO NOW SHE’S GONNA GET ONE TOO?? on her back???? the ouroboros she was looking at before! yes, the never ending cycle.
what the hell… i am deeply uncomfy. he’s watching her get a tattoo and it’s like erotic or something??? to him. and she’s breathing all weird. and then. there is a tattoo.
(this scene only reinforced my previous conclusions from earlier today looking up "am i asexual" quizzes)
god, is she gonna stay here with him? he says the weather is bad and he wants her to be safe and that he’ll sleep on the couch.
she says she feels different now after the tattoo. and he’s taking off the bandage. says it looks alright. but he’s bleeding again. and she’s taking off his shirt…..
the tattoo starts TALKING??? “you kiss her, and she’s dead” HEY WHAT
oh god……………………. the door shuts
pause. y’all. i don’t think i’m cut out for this.
okay, back to the FBI. mulder is here. trying to find scully. and he cannot reach her!!!
he sees the leaf she left on his desk…. and these two are waking up the next morning. his tattoo is still bleeding. dude, you should probably make some sort of appointment about that.
scully’s in his giant shirt as she shows the detectives at the door (!!!) her badge. they want to talk about the disappearance of the bird lady. they are not taking her seriously, because she is in some random guy’s shirt in some random guy’s house. but she’s jotting some stuff down.
things are clicking in her mind, about the disappearance. oh my god dial up noises! wow, that’s loud and annoying. shoutout to people who had to deal with that in the 90's.
she seems to be realizing that she has made a grave mistake.
THE STUFF THE RUSSIAN GUY MADE THE TATTOO INK OUT OF WAS IN THE KILLER’S BLOOD????!!!
she grabs her tattoo because like. now it’s in HER blood too. oh my god the tattoo ink had DRUGS in it????
scully is trying to call mulder…. who runs to his phone. but she hangs up on him!!!! now why would you do all that? oh, because jerse approaches.
she tells him to sit down. very seriously. and she straight up says she thinks the blood the detectives found was his. well i guess honesty is sometimes a good policy.
so they might hallucinate stuff now from the ergot. and they might be dangerous. they need to get to the hospital now.
he confesses to hearing things now…. “she talks to me. she hates women. my wife, my boss, you” ohhhh my god. i wonder how she is feeling....
she says they need to go to the hospital now. together.
the tattoo's voice is talking to him about who she called…. and he presses the redial button…. and….
HOLY FUCK, HE’S ATTACKING HER. i mean, i knew it was going to happen eventually, but like. doesn't make it any more enjoyable to watch.
oh man, they are really going at it…. he knocks her out….. and he wraps her up to take her to the incinerator……………. ???????
but she stabs him with the scissors… and she’s trying to tell him to take control. so he BURNS HIS ARM OFF???!? to get the tattoo to shut up.
BUT NOW THE MUSIC FLOURISHES OVER HER TATTOO???
girl if she has a demon in her now............. i need a cigarette
she’s coming back to the office with bruises on her face. “congratulations for making a personal appearance in the x files for a second time” says mulder. well, that’s gotta be a record. and that is exactly what he brings up next!
he’s trying to make a joke, but she’s grabbing the leaf on his desk………
he thinks this is his fault…… “not everything is about you, mulder. this is my life” “yes, but it….” (sighs)
end episode.
okay. so. what am i thinking.
well. i am thinking many things. first of all- what is that tattoo supposed to represent? was it supposed to represent how misogyny poisons men’s minds? and turns them into people they aren’t deep down? is it about male insecurity, and how it turns into violence? and if we are taking that interpretation- doesn't that kinda just blame women for the scourge that is misogyny? like "look how you divorced that guy, guess you can't blame men for hating half of the population" because if that was what they were going for. i find issues with that.
second. i’m glad scully had her growth moment. if i were her, i would have told off mulder a long time ago for being too domineering. i don't think he intends to do it- i think he gets too caught up in his own quest for answers- but intention does not make his actions any less hurtful. and she clearly needed to have that rebellion moment. i’m glad she had it, even if it went terribly, at least she survived.
but the agents' dynamic felt… mean-spirited. i couldn’t tell what was joking and what was below the belt, and i’m not sure i’m supposed to be able to. he does take advantage of her, and i certainly don't oppose her pointing that out. i oppose him being mean to her- or at least, i find it hard to watch. i understand that the whole project does mean the world to him because maybe, just maybe, it will bring his sister back- but still. it is an infuriating characteristic of his, how little attention he pays to others.
and i don't necessarily think that aspect of him is written consistently, either. what about that time they were so incredibly close to answers and he let them go because he wanted scully to be able to see her sister again? what about every single time he's risked his neck for her?
i guess what i'm saying is, his fury at the start of the episode felt like it came out of nowhere, and was directed at her questioning his authority- and was over nothing beyond her tuning out one time. i find that idea of mulder as this authority figure that scully is chasing approval from in a manner akin to her own father (!!!) hard to reconcile with the mulder who held her in irresistible, who pummeled the doctor who maybe possibly might have hurt her in one breath, who runs every theory by her, and so on. you see what i'm saying? it felt as if this episode cast the whole series in the retrospective light of him only wanting her around so he can have a loyal henchman, and not that he valued her as an actual person- which we know he does. she zones out one day and he snaps on her? she goes on a rant about how she is always chasing authority's approval shortly after? i'm just not buying it. it felt like the rift era again. you could argue that it is scully's grief that is distorting her view of him, but even entertaining that possibility from a narrative perspective made me feel like i needed a bath. so... sleazy.
bullying aside- for an episode about breaking free from mulder’s influence, he seemed to really care for her and try and reach her, if we ignore the terrible things he said and just focus on his actions. on vacation and at work, he wanted to make sure she was okay. and it was sweet, but when cast in the light i mentioned earlier- in comparison to her father- it felt, like, paternalistic, which made my skin crawl. which is an understatement.
she needed to have that important character development, don’t get me wrong. it seems she’s worked so hard her whole life and has never made time to break some rules, except for when she was a kid. she needs to rebel at some point- but it was the framing of their dynamic that icked me out. and maybe i'm interpreting something in a different way than everyone else does. honestly, i hope i'm misunderstanding something. please feel free to correct me.
there was clearly something on her mind that distracted her from one interview, and the episode is trying to show us that her life isn’t just the x files like mulder's is. they’re different. maybe they spend too much time together. maybe they needed time apart, and maybe she needed to do the things she never let herself in the past. but… you can tell from reading this post that while i agree with some of the character choices- scully confronting him for being too controlling, letting herself let loose for once- i think they made sense in theory but less so in this particular execution.
and yeah, there’s me the viewer who doesn’t want to see that shit happen, be it scully being attacked or sex outside the slowburn that gave us the term "ship". you can’t blame me there. i am a mere mortal. but also…… damn. something about the way jerse said he hated women and grabbed scully made me feel sick.
i think that scully has a lot of grief and anger, and i think she reached a boiling point in this episode. and i think she won’t do the things she did ever again. but it still felt so out of character to see her do those things. and was she implying, with her whole speech about her father, that she seems mulder as this controlling force in her life? that their dynamic has been entirely unequal from the beginning? that he acts like a boss to her, and whatever the fuck it is they have going on (because it can’t be described in words, we both know that) has been an imbalance of power this whole time? that makes things feel…….. less warm and fuzzy, in retrospect, don’t you think? the idea that mulder only keeps her around as a foot soldier and doesn't really give a damn about her?
(again. it could be her grief talking. grief is not rational. but i had never seen it like that before, and it casts everything in a different light)
i think this episode had clear commentary on misogyny. the way that jerse’s thoughts were poisoned to hate women, how we explore mulder inadvertently taking the upper hand throughout their relationship, the way the detectives wouldn’t believe scully at her word when questioning her about the blood. i think it explored scully's frustration in being in a male-dominated field, and feeling like she always has to be perfect. but other than that, i'm not sure what i'm supposed to take away from the whole thing, unless i am to think that whatever relationship it is they do have is nothing more than one of uneven control. because that's the vibe i was getting from this one.
it felt out of character, and not just in the purposeful subversion of how we normally see scully- their whole fight felt off. and the tone was all over the place. first we're joking, then we're arguing nasty style, then we're joking, then sexy, then fight time violence against women, then joke? unresolved ending feeling i cannot explain? what do i make of this?!
idk. i don't feel like i'm wording my points well, but i'm not sure i want to really keep trying either. and i feel that if i did my usual thing, which is watch an episode, take notes, think it over for a day, and THEN edit the notes, i might be able to have a more coherent thought process- but given potential controversy, i want to get this out tonight.
i want to really hear your thoughts- if you ride or die for this episode, walk me through it! did you also not like it? is it mid to you? i'm listening. i want to know. i have no ill-intent, and i feel bad that i've been a bit harsh lately. let us discuss. it is all peace and love over here.
#(gestures vaguely) you can't tell me that their relationship is that of a boss and an employee or i will need to call HR now#but also! it has not been like that! for the entire series!#and like i said her grief can distort that but. it felt. reductive. at best. and character assassination at worst.#not sure if i'm just a hater or of s4 isn't doing it to me but please be kind (sobs)#i don't wish to be a killjoy- it just didn't do it for me! but if it did do it for you- tell me why!#i won't argue; i just want to know. i promise i do not come online to start fights. i am simply to busy for this!#everyone in txf fandom has been so kind i worry i'll poke a sleeping bear and end the goodwill LMAO#juni's x files liveblog#txf#the x files
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Muggle college AU where Harry sneaks into tom’s dorm room (after making sure to drug tom’s water earlier ofc) and takes pictures of him while he sleeps and posts them online. because god fucking dammit, Tom riddle is the most annoying RA that could possibly exist, and he wants a little bit of light revenge.
Harry realizes that “light revenge” may have gotten out of hand around the same time he started stripping Tom, and suddenly he was balls deep in both Tom riddle and a felony. The gravity of the situation did nothing to prevent Harry from taking a video, even though it was just more evidence that could be used against Harry.
#i don’t wanna over-work it so have a barely thought out idea!#tomarry#tom riddle#bottom tom riddle#harry potter#non con#somnophilia#I heart somno if you couldn’t tell#cuz like Tom Riddle is such a brat but he can’t be when he’s unconscious !#I also really like the idea that Harry was convinced Tom was stalking him so of course to confirm this he had to stalk Tom back!#(tom was not stalking him)#(he was too busy figuring out how to get away with another murder)#and so harry decides to finally get revenge on Tom for being an asshole (doing his job and confiscating materials not allowed on campus)#by taking embarrassing pictures of him when he’s at his most vulnerable#the idea was that Harry’d post em online somewhere or use it as blackmail#(harry just wanted to jerk off to em)#but all of a sudden harry is having the best sex of his life (it doesn’t matter that tom’s asleep it’s fine) and he doesn’t want this to be#his only night with Tom#so he leaves Tom all messy and used on his dorm bed with a note telling him to check his phone#which has texts from Harry with the video and pics of their night together <3#he used his burner phone tho ofc ;-3#anyways#Tom thinks Harry knows about The Murders (Harry has no clue about The Murders) and freaks out#and eventually offers to let harry fuck him as much as he wants as long as he ‘keeps it secret’#and so starts a horridly fucked up situationship that Tom can’t leave for fear of his murders being exposed#but also he comes to crave these meetings with Harry#meanwhile harry is like the closest thing to a himbo that a stalker can be#he’s just happy to be here (sexually coercing Tom Motherfucking Riddle)#I have many thoughts
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😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻😻
Start a business they said... Then you can work everyday 😆
But it's all worth it in the end when it's something you truly love!
Purr Purr Co is set to launch in August 5th, but I've def been playing around with the thought of a launch date being... Idk this month!
Am I crazy? Maybe a little.
#cat#cats of tumblr#cute cats#i love cats#kitty cat#cute#cat loves its hooman#i love my cat#cats are the best#cats of instagram#caturday#torties of tumblr#tortie cat#tortitude#beautiful cats#tortiseshellcat#tortishell#purrpowerco#kitten#pretty eyes#pretty kitty#pretty colors#purring#pretty#pets#kitty#small business#pet shop online#online#cats cats cats
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commissions opening soon!!
ill try to open comms this weekend!!
things have been a bit overwhelming for me this summer since i havent been feeling the best, so i haven't been able to open comms that much, but i wanted to try and open comms again before the next school semester starts! (*_*;)
I'll have 5 slots open, and may open a 6th if people are interested :)
thank you for reading, i hope everyone has a good week!!
#digital commissions#commissions#lego#monkie kid#lmk#hlvrai#sonic#tmnt#rottmnt#reminder :)#sorry to tag these fandoms w no related artwork#i just wnated to tag in case since i post/posted art for these shows#art comms#i dont think ill be able to open comms for a while when school and work becomes more busy#im not online too much nowadays but if anyone has a questions about updated prices or comms#ill try my best to answer in the comments before comms open again!!
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if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified
#if it isnt already anyway.. i can see it happening as a school frosh thing. idk if it would catch on as a workplace thing#i kind of find the concept of being locked in with strangers and working to find a way out weirdly exhilarating though#at least compared to icebreakers cause i dont have to spend 10 minutes racking my brain for something to blurt out abt myself#as a bonus u could like. put people into groups and give prizes to whoever escapes first second third etc. apparently they also do themed#escape rooms.. maybe let people pick a theme? or voluntary sign up? actually this would be really fun for smth like a blind friend date#although if i found out i was locked in a room with an online friend id be too excited to actually escape LOL#ive never done an escape room before so sadly i cant speak from experience. its like up there on things i want to try next to rug tufting#workshop and visiting new art exhibits or conventions. i seriously need to get out more if it wasnt for the horrors <- school and anxiety#i was planning to invite cass to a drop-in art workshop in town but neither of us could go bc typography is making us go thru hell and back#AND THEY HAD A BUTTON MACHINE TOO#im nostalgic bc i miss working in groups and not being awkward abt it or worrying abt schedule conflicts#i realized that i learn best in groups and its a little corny but i like sharing ideas and talking through a problem#in elementary i could just sit down with friends for review and come out of it energized *and* more familiar with the material#and i could technically still do it now. but as adults we're more picky abt who we work with on top of being way more busy outside school#maybe im lonely. im shy and grew up not talking to ppl unless i absolutely have to so its hard to make friends on my own i guess#only thing getting me thru it is telling myself that humans like helping and that my cringe is overblown in my head. but its hard#hence the escape rooms. i have been able to talk to 2(!!) people though!! mostly abt school stuff but im glad to be on friendly terms#i dont really know how to be happy these days cause im constantly scaring myself abt my portfolio and finding places to work#not being ambitious is part of not wanting to put energy into something that wont work out while also not having the passion to do literall#anything else.. i should probably talk to my counsellor ugh#yapping
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i feel bad for your mom...
She had me exorcised before, like, twice, so I don't particularly feel bad for her, but I suppose someone has to
#anonymous#[.asks]#I guess people wouldnt know this from being on my blog for less than like a month but. still#Dare I say you could have surmised from me not taking her calls that we dont have the best relationship!#She's not a horrible person - horrors aside - but it is almost like this is none of your business random anon online#i am making for of you I am not mad at you. it's almost funny#you have to admit a stranger's relationship with their mother isn't exactly field for you -a random anon- to give your opinion#I'd guess you wouldn't really feel so bad for her then if you had any context at all about this woman
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God the loneliness has been hitting real bad since yesterday
#vent#not many irl friends to hang out with#i signed up for an event tomorrow and monday but#so many online friends but none that are either available or that I'm cozy with to talk#my best irl friend has been so busy for months that we barely exchange a few texts a day#and the larger friend group i had has been gone for months#it fucking sucks man i feel miserable#sure i get out and go outside and like volunteer and stuff but that's not friendship yknow#i spend maybe like 2-4 hours a WEEK talking to someone who isn't family#it's not enough i miss having friends and i miss being able to see people in person#all the ppl i relied on either left or are too fucking busy to talk#on certain days of the week i can reliably spend the whole day not once talking to a real life person. like today#it's slowly getting to the point that i'm getting existential dread and anxiety just from existing#because the only thing i can reliably look forward to every day is being fucking alone
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Does anyone know how to maneuver a relationship where they are interested in dating you but you were fine being old school acquaintances who don’t speak to each other
#tgdposts#personal#aroace#actually aroace#aromantic#asexual#ace#aro#asexuality#aromanticism#we’re hanging out at an undetermined point which I’m fine with I love hanging out but I can tell he’s into me and I feel neutral about it#good new is I’ve clearly grown since last time this scenario happened because I think I’m being less of a leading on asshole about it#also ideologically I’m not about assuming they want to date instead of be friends so I don’t want to assume anything#but based on how he’s talking to me I think he likes me which I obviously do not reciprocate#fond of me as the Brits say#he’s asked how my day/weekend was for the second time in all too short a timespan which I find telling#not that it irritates me but it’s obvious he wants to pursue SOMETHING#anyway just bc I said okay to hang for coffee does not mean I want to participate in this kind of online conversation he’s initiating#his eagerness to talk is telling and I already lowkey had vibes from him after the fall semester when he asked how my winter vacay was#I was like yeah I’m SUPER BUSY with family stuff and studying for my makeup exam#tbh thought that was the end of it until recently#this is mainly a vent post I guess if anyone has opinions feel free to share#I guess my broad struggle is that I’m learning how to be aroace and assume the best of a situation without leading people on#also I feel this kind of situation is almost inevitable if I want to make friends with guys even though having them want to date me#is not the most ideal start to a friendship with someone#ok to rb although idk why you’d want to
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Make Money Online
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Good night dash 🫶
The queue might run out in a day or two but there's busy 5 days ahead and I won't be on my phone much or at all! SMOOCHES
#-ˋˏ ༻sunlit serenade#so so many smoochies for everyone#trying my best but I'm so sorry#I'll try to queue a fic and some fic reblogs in my break tomorrow#I read so many good fics I still need to scream and share them!!#I hate being this busy :((#but once my new home is cozy I'll be chronically online again i promise
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i will return on tumblr soon bcs i'm graduating hs soon and acads r done so i have a Lot of time on my hands for now Anyway can i just say am very proud of myself. got into the Top 1 school in my country, top campus, and a vv competitive stem course. yay 😁💝💘❤️🔥✨
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒�� *·˚#it's hilarious bcs i got waitlisted for compsci#which i'm actually rlly proud of bcs i didn't take the exams that seriously and most of jhs was online#compsci competitive af man#but i prove my worth both online & onsite ^_^ always straight As baby! even this gr 12 LOL <3#i got into my 3rd choice (2nd choice was psych i am So glad i didn't get in i ended up not wanting it anymore. also competitive asf so i'm#ok w that) WHICH IS the best possible outcome actually bcs it Is my dream course.#i will reveal more another time tho ... >:)) Anyway am just super proud hehe. also of my twin (we both passed & all that <3) ^___^#also my friends !! barely any passed actually and even then i know only like 10-15 of ppl in my whole school who Did pass#and less so for their first choice/dream course or their preferred campus#MWHAHAHAHAHA >:))) ok i'm not shitting on anyone tho i'm just so so so proud and happy#gbye i am busy tho relaxing LMFAO i've been getting 12 hours of sleep the last 3 days. god. school was tiring af#but i'm a weirdo so it's fun B) Amen. i like saying amen despite being this rlly agnostic/atheist person LMFAOOO#upcat i love u. ty for loving me LMFAOOAOAOAOAOAOAO#so proud idk ig. i knew i'd make it (i hope thsi doesn't come off as pretentious) but i didn't know exactly Where#but the universe did its thing and i got into my dream school dream campus dream course#unsure abt dream school really but it's upd or not up. and also def my dream course ^_^
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every time I think i've managed to go a day without anxiety it says "haha just you wait!"
#the feeling of unaccomplishment just really hit me because I saw this one girl I was friends with during 2nd grade posting about her new#baby and starting her own business and although those aren’t things I want for myself right now I just feel so far behind everyone else#everyone I know from before I did online schooling for high school is at college (and I’m not joking when I say 95% of them are going to#nursing school which was what I wanted to do before I decided working in a hospital would be too much for me since I go there once a month#already for infusions) and even if I were to strike up a conversation with one of them it’s hard because they’re all at college and#probably busy and I can’t decide who would be best to reach out to because I haven’t talked to them in almost 9 years#I’ve been trying to post more on ig stories in hopes that one of them might reach out first but I fear I need to bite the bullet#I’ve been tempted to just say screw it and just ask on my story if anyone would want to hang out some weekend but that’s so embarrassing#even if someone does reply… let alone if no one replies#I just keep telling myself that when I get this job it will be different because it will force me to socialize but I’m scared I’ll never#get to achieve what’s ‘Normal’ in life#autumn rambles
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Weekly DIY Politics
Are you a resident of Scotland?
Do you live in a Labour constituency (bonus points if it's one they recently gained from the SNP)?
Do you oppose the two-child benefit cap?
Have you contacted your MP to express your disappointment over Labour's current actions (or lack of action) in this area?
Consider doing so now!
#Edit: obviously this applies to people in the rest of the UK too; I mention Scotland due to recent changes there that might make it easier#I mean the only way Labour are going to stop parroting that 'we have to appeal to the centre not the left' nonsense#Is if people give them feedback in constituencies where their victory is not certain#And the number of posts I've seen about this online outweighs the number of people I suspect have actually contacted their MP about it#I'm not promising their position will change but they're definitely not going to be aware of the depth of feeling on the matter#if nobody contacts them about it through the usual routes#I highly doubt that Labour is staffing an entire team of dedicated tumblr-watchers so probably best to contact them as well as posting#Personally I am not blameless in this- it's been a busy week and I couldn't get an email sent before the SNP's motion#But the issue hasn't just gone away and pushing for inclusion in the autumn budget or at least for it to be moved up the priority list#Is still important#At the end of the day we're not just opposed to this policy because it's proof that Labour are lousy#But because it is actively affecting and impoverishing children- and that doesn't go away just because one motion failed#It's not just a political football- so you can still criticise Labour's lack of action whilst pushing for them to actually change policy
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If you do SEO, you must have come across some clients who want to rank their website in 1 or 2 months.
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