#Because I like drawing characters at three quarter angles

[mushroominaforest]

I’m trying to practice drawing stuff like side profiles (I suck balls at that lol) and character interactions / more complex poses and I’ve ended up with not one but TWO drawings of Eliana being mean to Cody lmao 😭

(Tw: by ‘being mean’ I mean being abusive lol)

The first one is sillier, (and a bit older) and the second one is a little more dramatic lol

Idk what I’m doing. I just like drawing my silly little guys. Sue me

Also can you tell that I do not have a colour pallet for them lol. I just pick random colours every time I draw my ocs

(Also I know the poses are a little scuffed this is practice okay be nice to me)

[fijiitt]

I find it funny that 99% of my drawings is a character angled at three quarters when I absolutely despise that angle. My face anatomy knowledge does not go brr when I draw characters angled like that (hence the jaw/cheeks always slightly different everytime for the same character cough Engie cough).

Side profile is my fav angle, front facing is okay, behind i don’t even attempt because I suck

[tearsofthefilmreviews]

Review - The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes

Let’s get something clear: I love this franchise. Yes, Mockingjay is the least consistent (both films of that moniker) and the lesser of the franchise, but I still enjoy them, and love Catching Fire, as well as the first one. The excitement that I got on the announcement of this film was already at high levels from the initial teasing, but particularly in the last couple of weeks, I have been getting more and more hyped up for it. The trailers looked fantastic…and I am elated to say that this lived up to all my expectations and more. Enough so, in fact, that it has become my favourite of the whole franchise, and this review will explain many of the reasons why it is so.

-Coriolanus Snow-

"You seem like a good man, Coriolanus Snow."

Tom Blyth is an actor I have never seen before, and he absolutely won me over with this performance. Not only is the look of him stunning, but his performance is absolutely full of depth and emotion, showing us many sides of this character that we had never seen before, and truly setting him up by the ending to become who he is. It's a captivating performance, one that really draws you into him and his mindset, which is what the entire film is seen through; the lens that is the mind of Coriolanus Snow. 

It is portrayed clearly how he thinks and why he thinks this way; not just via the performance and writing, but visually as well, we feel his political ideologies deeply baked into the film in a very interesting way, providing a very different perspective than that of Katniss. His perspective, especially after the incident where he kills one of the Tributes in self-defence, is a much colder one, that slowly freezes, and then seems to unfreeze, only to become stone cold by the end. Thus, we see him kill Highbottom and go to university to pave his way to succeed the current president, who clearly manipulated certain scenarios as the “tests” she describes. He does start the film with prejudice towards those who live in the Districts but seems to get some warmth from Lucy Gray, only to go on a spiral once he’s forced to do service after being caught cheating for Lucy Gray in her Hunger Games.

This presents such a grappling political angle to be explored and felt in the film. On one hand, we clearly dislike the Capitol and what it stands for - fascism - especially the cruelty it inflicts. But because we are essentially playing from their side of the field via Coriolanus, we also feel his emotions and views on the events around him. He remarks on the Tribute killing as something that made him feel “powerful”. He is willing to cheat the system he so desires to be a large part of to save Lucy Gray. He nearly shoots her out of rage at her betrayal in the end - a betrayal is justified via very unfortunate means. He kills the mayor’s daughter of Lucy Gray’s hometown so she doesn’t rat them out and get the whole lot hung, in an emotionally shocking moment that also serves as another step for Lucy Gray to see his true nature. Perhaps the most devastating moment is when he rats out a longtime best friend, Sejanus, and does nil when he is hanged for his attempts to help out the District 12 Rebels. Clearly demonstrating his character under great stress.

“The Hanging Tree” is also evidence of fantastic foreshadowing. Lucy Gray first sings it in a beautiful field - the same field Mockingjay Part II ended on - after the second of the three killings Coriolanus performs. It's about them, Lucy Gray and Coriolanus. It gives so much more depth to the song as well as to Mockingjay, where this song was first heard - there’s more meaning in that scene now, knowing the legacy of this song - created 65 years before the 3rd Quarter Quell by Lucy Gray Baird, who knew Coriolanus Snow very intimately, the very person the Rebels and Katniss are going against is indeed, Snow. President Snow, whom he became after victory, loss, betrayal, and ultimately arriving on top.

Something I found quite interesting is the way we are presented to Snow. Yes, he is in a prestigious Capitol academy, but he isn't quite the stuck-up rich boy that the others are. He is the only one who even makes an effort to meet Lucy Gray, and is the only one who pushes for it to become the norm. He betters the Games, which in reality is only driving the oppression of the Capitol even further, and in his own image, clearly something Gaul was also looking for. 

If it wasn’t clear already, let me iterate one thing clearly: Coriolanus Snow’s “transformation” in the end never really happened. It isn’t rushed. He was always this person, using the emotions shown as a way of manipulation, which is clear as day. Both in the way he makes a point of changing the Games how he envisions them, and takes more time to get Lucy Gray to bond with him.

Terrific character, truly brought to life by the script, direction, and Blyth.

-Lucy Gray Baird-

The "songbird" of District 12 - and the film/book's title - whom was essentially tricked into becoming a Tribute by Mayfair, the daughter of the mayor of the place she lives in her District. She's sweet yet focused, going with her heart rather than what others tell her; i.e. when she chases after her fellow 12 Tribute when the Games begin, rather than taking Coriolanus' advice and hiding out alone. She sticks with him until his eventual death, which was inadvertently caused by Coriolanus. We hear many tunes from her, all in various circumstances; she sings in protest when she is picked, she sings before the Games begin to get donations and to make her own statement, she sings during the Games as she is covered in snakes, which is one of the best shots of the film, she sings in a bar to all of the townspeople in 12, and she also primarily sings in that field, which is the origin of "The Hanging Tree".

Lucy Gray herself is a trustworthy person. She didn't ditch Coriolanus in the end and run away because she outright deceived him; he is the one who deceived her. He lied to her about Sejanus' death, something she quickly picked up on but didn't mention. This is the moment that makes her realize where Coriolanus' mind is headed, and that she absolutely cannot trust him from that point forwards. Clearly it does bring hurt to her - they had truly bonded over the course of the film, throughout and after the Games - and so she hesitates, watching from the bushes as he discovers her message, the dress he had given her in the mud with a snake under it. She sings, another factor that nearly gets her shot from Coriolanus' rage, another sign that she absolutely needs to dissapear. She clearly knew what he had done to his own close friend, and so him mentioning he had killed three was the moment to test him on it, and he failed that by lying. 

Let me make my own opinion clear: I believe Lucy Gray is alive. The rumour that she was shot in the woods is doubtful, especially considering how far they had already been without pursuit, and I believe that it is based on Coriolanus nearly hitting her with a bullet. I do believe that she escapes Panem, and lives outside of it for the remainder of her life, something that is both her true want and need at the same time. The ending is bittersweet, and I can see why it is divisive - but I believe this is the way it ends and it makes it clearly: good ending for them both in different ways. She gets to escape Panem, while he becomes more politically powerful.

On another personal level, I absolutely love every song she sings, and Rachel Zegler smashes it out of the park. My favourite is probably "Singing At Snakes", both between her vocals, the viscerality of her performance and the gorgeous visual size of it. I love a lot about this film, but that scene in particular really hit me as something truly special. I find it amazing how she managed to turn such a situation - literally being covered in rainbow snakes - into a moment of empowerment, staring right at the camera as she sings a powerful ballad. Its a harrowing visual, and also gives a strong meaning to the title - she is quite literally the songbird, being covered in snakes - the snakes which can also represent Coriolanus. He gets ever so close to her, the two intertwined, but is ultimately deceitful and a betrayer. A real 'snake in the grass' if you will, as he's quite literally in the grass when he shoots at Lucy Gray, and she, like a songbird, sings before flying away. There's quite a lot of depth to this film, and it shows how much care is truly in the project. Especially between the Songbird and the Snake who both helps her and then backstabs her in a metaphorical sense, all set out by the Songbird's Ballad.

The final thing I would like to talk about in relation to Lucy Gray is the spectacular turn we see and is aforementioned in this review. Her tension in the cabin hidden behind a smile is palpable, not to mention the knife she holds as she exits and vanishes out of the life of Coriolanus. So many emotions are visible and tangible on the surface, but in that moment, after he discovers the guns hidden by Spruce to save Coriolanus from the law, there is so much under the surface. Tension, fear, realization, and commitment…as she decides to truly commit to ditching him for the betterment of herself and her cause. Seeing him for how he always was.

Its such a poetic way she exits as well. Quite literally she says that she’s “going to go get katniss” and leaves Coriolanus. And then, decades later, Katniss from District 12…such a delightful connection.

What a character. I love Lucy Gray Baird.

-The Games-

"Filled with the terror of becoming prey...see how quickly we become predator?"

The Games aren't truly run by Casca Highbottom; the real one behind the strings is Viola Davis' Volumnia Gaul. In fact, in the film's ending, Highbottom admits he wanted the Games to be cancelled, but they were pushed further due to Coriolanus' proposal to Gaul. His proposal changes the Games completely, making the Tributes be seen as humans so that the audience connects more, and will tune in more in the hopes that those they like will win. As Coriolanus realizes, heavily based on Gaul's quote above, the Capitol uses the Hunger Games to keep the Districts in line, by showing them the "true nature" of humanity, how they will turn in an instant to save themselves. I put that in quotes because Lucy Gray isn't entirely wrong; a lot of the people in the Games are very terrified and reluctant, so not everyone is truly bad. Yet, Gaul isn't entirely wrong either, since everyone - even Lucy Gray herself - does things they would never do otherwise in the name of self-preservation. It's definitely an interesting discussion, because the latter is directly promoting fascist, harsh rule, while the former is more optimistic and seeking change, yet they both, in this context, seem to have a point. I do personally prefer to stick by Lucy Gray's point of view, but it is impossible to ignore how Gaul does see the very unfortunate, primal side of humans.

This Hunger Games, the 10th Annual, is probably the best Games sequence through the entire series. I love the big, sprawling arenas of the previous films, with all their manufactured nature, but this is a whole new experience. The arena here is much more claustrophobic and focused, comprising only of pathways and ducts inside the building, as well as the not-so-large centre area. It's also affected by the rubble laying around, which was caused by a rebel bombing that killed four of the Tributes before they could even begin playing. After all, as Gaul says, the Games must go on lest they risk being seen as weak by the Districts. It's a very frantic and fast-paced Games, while also being incredibly tense and exciting. Lucy Gray shows how much survival instinct and wit she truly has, dodging all sorts of assaults on her path to help her fellow Tribute from 12, who has a neck infection and rabies, which nearly kills her had he not been killed by being smashed in the face by a bottle of water, indirectly sent by Coriolanus. He later helps her again just before the snakes emerge, and again using water.

Lucy Gray's victory is one that is cut short for Coriolanus, who is exposed and sent off. However, Lucy Gray herself is treated well in the end, sent off by Highbottom back home, with a sum of money. This shows more of Highbottom's character; his disdain for the Games, and so he is clearly trying to help the victor feel more at home, especially after the unexpected snake incident. She resumes her normal life while also planning to ditch Panem entirely; not to rebel and storm the Capitol like Katniss does many decades later, but to use her victory to her advantage and get out of the country. Which she does, in the end. She is never mentioned in history, likely wiped out entirely by Coriolanus, as they claim that the only District 12 winner prior to Katniss and Peeta was Haymitch.

Everything from the writing to the filmmaking and acting from all the Tributes - showing pure, raw adrenaline and desire to survive - makes this Hunger Games undoubtedly the best one in the series. The others - 74th and 75th - are great in their own rights, but honestly don't feel as fully complete and realized as this one really does. 

One thing about this Games in particular that is amazing is the voyeuristic detachment we often get when it, as will be mentioned below as well. It brings us a whole new perspective that we never truly got in the past; that of the wealthy Capitol figureheads watching over the bloody, televised competition - comprised of the mentors, crowd and host - that adds another layer to it all. It’s for the first time in the series we are in this room. With how those within the room react, it is more clear than ever how much of a spectacle this is seen as, even when people get - on Coriolanus’ suggestion - more time to know the Tributes. The lives lost are treated as simply a part of the show, a visceral show meant to shake the viewer to their core, to show them manufactured primal emotions and actions, in an effort to keep those who would otherwise rebel in line. The fact that we get this sort of experience, thanks to the heavy involvement of Coriolanus, adds to how special these Games are. This and the dynamic, creative camerawork lends itself to a splendid viewing experience - which essentially convicts us as the viewer. We hold a voyeuristic perspective on top of a voyeuristic perspective, and are no different than the Capitol, being entertained by watching the less fortunate slaughter each other. Those in the room, watching the Games on the screens, are already detached from it - even most mentors, besides Coriolanus, who - based on their reaction as they leave - cared more for the prize than the Tribute. We are detached by a further layer, and yet, we as the audience have more emotional investment; we care for these characters, especially Lucy Gray and the young child, who reminds us of Rue from the first film. Due to this, it shows us how we are not currently at the Capitol’s level, its not as harmful, especially since what we are watching is fictional and we know this. However, the film warns us…we aren’t far removed from the Capitol. Its a scary thought, and it absolutely should be - with the state of the world, Panem seems more and more realistic by the day.

-Foreshadowed Consequences-

I want to talk about some of the great, subtle foreshadowing we get in this film, the first revolving around the death of Casca Highbottom at the hands of Coriolanus. It's a small moment, but the exact substance that Coriolanus poisons in the ending is something we see Highbottom drink right in the beginning of the film. We then see Coriolanus find a capsule that looks exactly like the ones Highbottom uses, except it is a much more deadly substance, a small detail with a fantastic payoff.

When Coriolanus sees the snake pit from above and is speaking to Gaul about the proposal, before it comes up between them, he learns from her that the snakes will not attack you if they are familiar with you - including getting your scent from an object, which is why Coriolanus takes the cloth with Lucy Gray's on it and shoves it into the pit, which is what enables her to survive the Hunger Games after a furious Gaul pours the snakes in, which kill every other Tribute.

The other moment has already been mentioned, when Lucy Gray sings "Singing At Snakes" and is covered in the snakes while she sings, eventually being freed from them. This is literally the ending of the film represented in a single scene, with her entangled in the snakes that represent Coriolanus, only to be freed of them by the end. I said this already, but it is beautiful, and made even more so by the fact that we get both the direct and voyeuristic perspective of it - seeing it both in the arena and via the screens. 

-The Filmmaking-

I love so much of the filmmaking on display here; I've mentioned the visuals before, but I want to get more in depth in this section. I see much great artistic value in the filmmaking side, beyond the writing and character building.

The cinematography is spectacular. There are so many interesting shots and camera angles, and ways of using screens during the Games to give an interesting voyeuristic perspective on the Games. We get a mix both from that voyeurism Coriolanus and the other mentors show, and a more direct perspective in the arena itself, with very dynamic camerawork. I love the rounded effect during action scenes, whether the camera is moving or staionary, where you truly feel the space around the characters. 

The production design is simply flawless. There isn't much else to be said to describe it...everything fits the world and the time period of said world to a T. The arena especially is spectacularly constructed, as are the many other buildings we see, such as the classroom in the Capitol, Gaul's lab, Coriolanus' house, etcetera...and the District 12 that we see is such a great contrast to it. It feels much more rustic and industrial than even the less-wealthy homes in the Capitol. The cabin the two leads go to in the end is such a charming little place, complimented by the rainy exterior, and I also really liked seeing the outside of the Capitol in a much different light; a positive view on it from Coriolanus.

The costuming is great. All of the clothing feels very believable, and helps the world feel even more realized and complete. From the academy uniforms, to the dresses, there is a delicate fabrication to it all that shows a clear care and love of the franchise, and attention to detail. 

Editing and VFX are great; no funky CGI or weird cuts to be seen here. Everything flows very well and makes sense, and the CGI is damn good. Visually otherwise, there is such a gorgeous style to the film, particularly when we are in the Capitol. The switch in visuals between the opening half - the Games and setup - is very interesting as well. We go from bright, warm colours to a much colder pallette as soon as Coriolanus is sent into service, and then we get a middle road at the end. Keeping the look of the Capitol while also maintaining the colder look, showing the character progression clearly in a visual way. To help the world feel even further lived in, we see many people in many locations doing things; the 'busyness' of the scenes, to keep things from being static, even when the focus is clearly on certain characters. Even in smaller moments, such as when Coriolanus records the fatal recording of Sejanus, they aren't simply stood still and talking; they are busy, which keeps the engagement going even in the slower scenes. The dramatic effect produced visually and also through performances further sells these, such as when Highbottom confronts Coriolanus about the cheating.

Also, I want to touch on the writing of the film. I've gone into depth on the main characters already, so this will focus on the side characters that both liven up the world and play significant roles in the story of the film. Casca Highbottom is a very prominent figure, the one who truly invented the Hunger Games, even if he admits he dislikes the idea now, especially after 10 years of it. Making such a comment is what ends up with him dead, killed off to make way for the new regime to take his place. His actions are clearly in an attempt to subdue the Games as much as he can, and his frustration is clear when Coriolanus' proposal works to only further the institution that Casca so despises. This is why he sends the young man into service; not truly due to the cheating, but he realizes the power that is present and wants to get rid of it before the Hunger Games become even more monstrous. Then we have Gaul, who has all of Panem wrapped around her devious fingers. She's very clever and intelligent, and seems to have a great judge of character. After all, she refers to many of the things Coriolanus went through as 'tests' of her own design, one of which was clearly the snakes in the Games. She wanted to see how far he would go, what rules he would bend, to get his way, something critical to him both being useful to her and a desirable replacement when she eventually would pass on. 

Finally for this section, let's talk about the score, songs and sound design in a bit more than passing detail. This series has always had spectacular music, and this is not a trend that ended 8 years ago. We have an impeccable score here, that both sounds great on its own and really digs the emotional beats deeper. One moment I loved was when our leads are laying together near a lake, and all is calm...until the score gets tense, as the conversation goes a bit awry, their ideals and values clashing. The tension is heightened through the score, and very keenly displayed. The tracks during action scenes are as intense and exciting as they need to be, particularly during the Games themselves. Sound design is also great, a lot of it very subtle and going further to just sell the believability and viscerality of it all. All of the songs are great; Rachel Zegler sells them vocally, and the musical production matches each one so well, and when it needs to, lets her be perfectly raw or even in tune with the score itself.

All of these elements, combined with everything else discussed - characters, the interesting politics, the narrative - really make this such a perfect work of art that I don't honestly think, even as a series fan, was reached by the others. This film even blows Catching Fire out of the water very much.

-Conclusion-

I think my absolute love for the film is evident in however many words I've written out here. It's a true labour love of both for filmmaking and also the franchise, and its a clear evolution of Lawrence's craft. I applaud him for fighting for this to be one film, against the studio's wishes, because it is undoubtedly much more complete and superior like this; giving it the Mockingjay treatment would have only been a disservice.

It is with a highly happy heart that I bestow my rating upon this film and, even if it might go down, remember how this film held a 3.8 average on this platform, showing clearly how this film is beloved by its fandom.

10/10.

[bmpmp3]

Do you have any tips for drawing bodies from multiple angles?

WROTE A LOT SORRY its under a cut!

honestly i dont have the most practice with it since a good 70% of what i draw is characters wait up standing looking 3/4s left or right orz BUT some things that helped with the few interesting poses i draw once every fiscal quarter IS.....life drawing orz

specifically life drawing sessions where you do a bunch of quick gestural figures (like a 60 second timer each pose) at the beginning and then slowly increase the time for later poses, like 2 minutes, then five, where you slowly increase the amount of detail and rendering each pose, and then one or two long 10 minute ones where you go all out. i think that kinda structure helps a lot to 1) warm you up and get loosey goosey with ur lines and 2) get in the zone to think about how bodies work without overwhelming urself - like in the 1 minute sketches you could basically only get a weird stick figure, in the 2 minute ones maybe you might get a little more definition in the sillhouette, at the 5 minute poses you got some folds of the flesh implied with a few lines and a bit of hatching, and by the 10 minute ones ur really thinking about how the different parts of the body all interact because you already did some practice (the previous poses) if that makes sense?

ALAS we are in a world situation where cramming 40 people in a room to silently draw one naked person for three hours is not......happening (at least not where i live) so for the past couple years ive had to make do with online resources, which arent half bad! theyre not quite the same, for me at least (i think in person i can see more interesting angles) but they do the job! here's some I've used:

http://reference.sketchdaily.net/en

https://line-of-action.com/practice-tools/figure-drawing

https://quickposes.com/en

https://youtu.be/mNNSwITdPIM (linking this channels clothed references so no one gets a surprise titty in the face but normally i personally use nude references) (although recently ive been using some clothed references as well just because i realized im so out of practice drawing clothes hsjlkfBJKLFJSFKLD)

figure drawing and life drawing and especially gesture drawing is also something thats kinda tricky to learn if no one ever taught you (and honestly its tricky if someone DID teach you lol) so maybe someday i'll get around to trying to explain what ive learned myself if that could help someone

ive tried using 3d models but ive never foudn them that useful, probably for the same reason i prefer irl models to pictures (easier to see whats goin on) BUT sometimes it can help as a rough guideline if ur doing a weird angle youve never done before!!

SPEAKING of guidelines. guidelines are ur friend. guidelines r ur lifeblood. guidelines will always help even if u dont follow half of them they are SO helpful - I OFTEN find myself kinda skipping them, like you can see here in this drawing i havent erased the sketch from yet that i drew a circle and then a line for shoulders and gave up (probably impatient lol):

BUT guidelines can help so much~ when im drawing a full pose i'll usually have guidelines that really are no more than stick figures like basically like:

stick figures with dots for joints and maybe some rough lines here and there like it doesnt need to be nice or perfect since its just gonna get erased anyway~ it helps me keep track of how bones work hjfsdskjvfdfs

OH and artist mannequins.....like 3d models theyve also never done me any good like those wooden ones? I hate em theyre so stiff and i dunno what to do with them BUT.....okay...action figures? not bad....like maybe not so much with anatomy but if you have a doll or action figure with good articulation you can kinda use that to help out with funky poses sometimes!! like i have this one gundam and honestly....even though its a mecha with a giant mecha dong or whatevers going down there its like....not a horrible mannequin for poses jfksdlfjrfkehjklsd

WITH REGARDS TO foreshortening.......................................we are all on our own with that one orz LIKE i have tried every trick in the book, every funky tip and method and technique and none have worked for me so i just wing it jhkDmFJKDLS WELL actually having like a page of really sloppy loose stick figure sketches where you experiment with proportions helps a lot!! i do that with weird poses or angles, like dont worry about about how it looks HELL unfocus ur eyes. unfocus ur eyes. i do that all the time while drawing and its great it helps you see the big picture and the silhouette without focusing too much on one thing~

anyway yeah i dunno i guess a lot is just experimentation but hopefully some of these resources might be useful!!

[unhonestlymirror]

Hello I wanted to ask you for some advice I got a comment saying that they wanted to commission me but I’m a traditional artist and I don’t know how that would work? And I have never been commissioned before so I don’t know how that would work

Hello dear,

I can't say I'm such an expert in comissions myself (van-del if you're reading this I'm sorry xd).

But.

Since that person, I suppose, asked you about a digital comission, not just a comission - the first thing I'd done in your place is telling straight-forward that you are experienced mostly in traditional art. (but if that person didn't clarify then it's much easier to lead them to a favorable field for you.)

(Oh damn, I've seen so much threads about taking comissions but where are they when they're so needed?! xd)

Of course it's preferable to have a comission card(?) I guess, it's called so. But if you're LIKE ME don't have any - no need to panic! Ask about:

How many characters your client wants to see in ONE drawing (in two drawings separately - two prices)

PAYMENT METHOD. This is the most important point. Find out what online money receiving services work in your country - and what the commission is (not a drawing haha). PayPal, Ko-fi, Boostie, ByeMeACoffee, Patreon - and many others. It is better to plunge into jurisprudence and economics than to find out later why the client sent money - but they did not come. However, if the client can pay in cash, that's even better. Just don't forget to wear a long black coat and a hat.

It's preferable to mention in advance what you WILL NOT DRAW - usually people write "porn, furry, mecha, complex backgrounds", etc. For example, I don't draw bicycles, because they remind me of that jerk in a hurry who broke my brother's nose. Remember, that no one can force you to draw something uncomfortable for you money can but i didn’t say it

Ask in details about characters: their age, race, gender, hobbies, behavior, appearance, do they wear accessories (you can rise the price for too much details), their profession, their lifestory - for better understanding.

Usually artist set different prices for "just head / three quarters / full length" of a character. From cheapest to the most expensive.

Ask about what should happen with them on a drawing: they can stay still like manekens or being in a move. If you are confident enough in your abilities - specify the angle.

If something happens to them - specify in what place. It can be a park, a shop, a car interior, a palace - the complexity also increases with the background. Let your client know upfront if you don't draw complex backgrounds.

When you have discussed everything in detail:

If your client is not your close friend, it is advisable to require an advance payment (about 50%). And it is advisable to draw up an agreement in which you undertake to return this prepayment, if during the sketching you suddenly did not want to continue working.

It's time to discuss a deadline. My honest advice: "time you think it will take" + "one week". The overestimation of one's strength is real.

You draw a sketch. You DON'T put in much effort, but you make the future drawing understandable enough. Because your client can change their mind and say "oh, you know, i want them not sitting in a cafe but dancing. with glow sticks". - and you have to put in a lot of extra effort.

Remember: if you discussed all the details - and then you lost all desire to draw this - you are not an asshole if you tell your client "i won't do this". You are NOT an asshole if you drew a sketch, lost your desire, RETURNED THE PREPAYMENT and said "I won't do this". It's your own work.

You start drawing the whole comission. You put effort.

If you're starting to realize "+ one week" wasn’t enough - tell your client about the delay and offer them some additional extra drawings to make amends. If you draw them before the commission, send them first. Show your client "nobody's forgotten, nothing's forgotten".

If your client, after your presentation of the full work, says, “oh you know, I don’t want this at all” - that is, behaves like an asshole - you have the right not to return the prepayment and to tweet what a jerk this person is. (this will be impolite, but you will have the right to do so)

Not to overestimate your powers is just as important as not to underestimate your work! Ask yourself how much you would pay yourself for your drawing - and set that price. Do not get fooled by "why is it so expensive" whiners - if a person does not want to pay, they simply will not.

That is, I think I told everything important. Hope it helps and wish you good money! ☺️

[discountalien-pancake]

Okay was I the only one unaware that Maggie Steifvater wrote a sequel to the movie Brave? It’s called Braverly and I just saw the cover and I’m 100% sure it’s a Bowater cover because of the face™️. It’s not out yet but it popped up on my amazon and the first thing I thought was that it looked like Bowater channeled Merida for this cover, then I saw the title, then I looked up the synopsis and lo and behold, Merida! I have no idea what to expect

Yeah idk i have so little to say lol. that sure is a Bowater like every other Bowater and that sure is a title in Yana… like, wow! It does nothing for me. It does not entice me to read this book. Maybe it would have if there weren’t a bajillion other equally boring three-quarters angled bowater portrait covers. She’s got her technique down pat and it’s beautifully polished but merida has no fucking personality in this portrait it’s just another Aesthetically Vaguely Frowning White Girl.

It’s static and blah and it is the antithesis of Merida as a character. Where is the spunk? Are you telling me Merida’s the type of girl to just *exist* for people to behold her aesthetically frowning countenance? Hell no!

Compare it to the original movie poster, where she’s in mid-draw, staring directly at you. That is a girl who gets shit done, in the middle of getting shit done! Idk what sort of direction Bowater was given, but this cover falls very flat for me.

6/10 that sure is a middle grade adventure novel (Idk if it’s actually YA but it looks middle grade)

[aiatiwoyouryrarialv]

“How to Drive”

Words: 1,134

Rating: G

Warnings: N/A

Categories: M/M

Part 2 of “Indomitable Ferity”

Characters: Brian Thomas, Timothy Wright

Relationships: Timothy Wright/Brian Thomas

"Are you ready?" Tim asked as he parked the car.

"As ready as I can be," Brian replied, flashing Tim a nervous smile that revealed his fangs.

"We'll take it slow," Tim promised as he unbuckled his seat belt, Brian following. The two exchanged seats; with Brian in the driver's seat, he began to feel even more overwhelmed.

"Take your time," Tim reassured him, noticing the man's reluctance. "The car's not on. You can push the pedals, turn the wheel, get comfortable." As Brian slid his hands gently over the steering wheel, Tim realized how much his friend had changed.

It had been difficult but somehow Tim and Jay had managed to get Brian back. In time, the dark presence pulling at Brian's mind had relented and his happy personality had returned, but he was different. The Operator's influence had been strong, changing him physically and psychologically. Though he had gained his personality back, he was less confident and more dependent. Tim didn't mind the dependence but it was obvious that Brian did.

Brian also had a different feeling to him; Tim was hesitant to label the feeling as "feral" because Brian was most definitely not feral, but still. More than once Jay had found him crouched down in the backyard, staring off into the trees with a distraught look on his face. When asked what was wrong, Brian could never say. In his rare moments of anger, Brian would growl low in his throat, the sound more than threatening. And then there were times when Tim and Brian would simply be doing something such as watching television or making dinner and Brian would stare off into space. When Tim asked what he was doing, Brian would mumble, "Listening," then shush him. Of course, Tim couldn't hear anything, but Brian could.

Physically, not much had changed, but the changes were obvious nonetheless. Brian's canine's had fully turned into sharp fangs, smothering what little confidence he still had. The other change was his fingernails. The nails had turned pitch black and were long, filed into sharp points at the end. Brian had tried several times to cut them but within an hour, they were back to their points. Eventually, Brian had relented and settled for painting them black to hide the ugly discolouration.

"Okay, I think I'm ready," Brian finally said.

"You remember the list?" Tim asked and Brian nodded, going over the list out loud as he made the proper adjustments.

"Mirrors. Seat. Seatbelt..." Glancing up at the overcast sky, he added, "Headlights." Drawing in a deep breath, Brian slowly turned the key in the ignition. As the engine came alive, he turned off the radio. His long fingers wrapped around the wheel, nails digging into his palms, making his hands ache.

"Relax," Tim gently reminded, setting a hand over Brian's right one. His hands released their death grip and instead tentatively gripped the wheel.

Nearly three quarters of the large parking lot was empty, providing Brian with the adequate room to practice without fear of hitting someone. Several small stores stretched in a right angle to the right, a few cars parked at the end of the lot. The main shopping center had gone out of business years earlier, leaving plenty of space to drive.

Putting the car in drive, Brian slowly applied pressure to the gas pedal. When nothing happened, he pressed a little harder and the car shot forward. A look of panic appeared on Brian's face as his foot left the pedal and his hands left the wheel. The car rolled forward before Brian stomped on the brake, both men being pitched forward and Tim hitting his head on the lowered visor.

"I can't do this. This was a bad idea." Brian reached for his seat belt and Tim grabbed his hand with both of his own.

"Hey. You're doing fine. It's just a rocky start. Take a deep breath." Brian did as instructed. "Good. Ya know, I was nineteen when I learned how to drive."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I spent most of my childhood in the hospital and that doesn't leave much time for learning to drive. The first time I ever drove, I ran over a possum."

Brian chuckled, gracing Tim with another brief look at his sharp teeth. Tim couldn't help but smile too.

"I promise you're doing alright. If you wanna stop, we can. But you're doing fine. Just keep your hands on the wheel, alright?"

Brian nodded and returned his hands to the steering wheel. With a deep inhale, he slowly applied pressure to the gas pedal, waiting until the car slowly reacted before adding anymore pressure. This time, the vehicle slowly rolled forward at a comfortable pace. Directing the car, Brian drove down the abandoned aisles between empty parking spaces, slowly picking up speed. When he appeared to be comfortable with driving around the parking lot, Tim suggested something.

"You can drive around back of the building if you'd like. It might be a narrower space but there'll still be room if you wanna try it." Brian absentmindedly nodded and slowly eased the car to the edge of the lot, turning right and driving past the broken gate of what was once the store's garden center. Around back, the building appeared to be just as abandoned. An old green dumpster sat against the back wall and farther down, a car was parked behind one of the stores that was still in business. The space was smaller but Brian experienced no difficulty making his way around the building and back to the front.

"Alright, how about parking?" Tim suggested.

At the empty section of the lot, Brian slowly pulled into one of the spaces, hitting the brakes a little harder than necessary. Shifting the car into park, Brian got out and walked around the car. The vehicle was perfectly parked inside the three white lines of the parking space.

As Tim got out of the car, Brian was practically bouncing in place. "I drove! I did it!" He reminded Tim of a child who had accomplished something they never thought they'd be able to.

Turning to Tim, Brian wrapped him in a tight hug. Without restraint, his nails sliced through Tim's jacket, creating ten long gashes in the fabric. Brian immediately tore away from the embrace and began apologizing but Tim was quick to shush him.

"It's just a jacket, don't worry about it."

A shy smile appeared on Brian's face. "Thank you." The two leaned in and shared a gentle kiss, Tim's hands holding Brian's hips.

When the two pulled back, Tim said, "Let's go home. I'm sure Jay would like to know that you didn't crash and kill us both." Brian rolled his eyes before climbing into the passenger's seat, a smile plastered to his face.

[gogo-karasuno]

Sets and Spikes

Rating: General

Characters: Atsumu Miya, Koume Amatani (OC)

Pairing: Atsumu Miya/Koume Amatani (kind of)

Summary: Atsumu Miya kisses like he sets.

Notes: Written in second person POV. It technically could read like a reader insert with more of a backstory and fleshed out personality. Han-chan is derived from Hantai (Opposite). It should read like a shortened “Little Opposite”

- -

Atsumu kisses like he sets. You find this out the first Tuesday of your personal training camp.

He catches you as you are leaving the Inarizaki gyms. His brown eyes are dancing with a mirth as you wordlessly question him. Stopping for him will be a bad call. Boys with carefree attitudes while oozing confidence are always dangerous. But, you feel like not stopping would be an even worse call. A setter that gives you what you need feels so rare in your life. Offending the only one to match your so far would damn you.

“Where you rushin’ off to?” he asks while falling into your step. He made the decision for you. “After you finish yer personal practice you prance off.”

You are fourteen years old but have nearly nine centimetres over the national average height for women. Among your teammates you are their “Little Captain” and “Our Little Joan”. The next shortest person still has five centimetres on you. That feeling means nothing when you match up against him. There is nearly sixteen centimetres between you and right now you can feel it.

“I don’t prance,” you mumble under your breath. There is a rush of heat to your cheeks. 

You tell yourself it has nothing to do with how he is still handsome with his three-quarters-ugly personality. Nor does it have to do with the confidence and openness only the volleyball court draws out of you.

“Nah. There’s this little graceful bounce.” You watch him try to imitate how he thinks you move. It makes you bite back laughter and smiles; he looks ridiculous. “Matches yer jumps for spikes when ya just appear.”

“Broad jumps add power with decreased shoulder strain.” Deflection to volleyball is safe. Your social skills are at their highest when one of your passions are involved. Sometimes you think that is why you seem to only make volleyball friends. "I'm just quick and nimble when I play. Always have been."

“And that little hop before you receive?”

His observations make you self-conscious. He spends some of his time analyzing your form. It makes sense because he is a setter. Just from your own observation you know his destiny is to become the number one in his division. Him being unobservant would be like being the number five ace without an arsenal of spikes. Or, being an opposite that never learns to be everything beyond a wing spike. You both have idiosyncrises befitting your status.

“A split step.” You chance a glance up to see him looking on with intrigue. “It keeps me ready to move while I analyze the opponents. Probably been muscle memory since fourth year in elementary school.”

He stretches his long body toward the sky while still matching your steps. “This may be the most you’ve said off the court, Han-chan.” 

The face you make at his odd choice in nickname sends him into a fit of laughter.

“You’ve still not told me where yer goin’ this fine Tuesday evening.”

Telling him anything will end in bad news. You know this before you even open your mouth. Even with all of your perceived faults regarding attention span and mercurial interests in subjects you still excel at your academically challenging school. In volleyball, you play with observations as much as intuition. Thinking (and overthinking when things get too quiet) while weighing and acting upon split-second decisions are among your strongest skills. Everything points to a tricky end if you tell the fox sly boy anything.

“A local garden.”

You do not, however, tell him why you are going there. Two days into this camp means your brain is overloading with mental notes you need to write down. This is an arrangement made by your assistant coach (“Please do this. Your talents, drive, and passion will take you so much further than this team can go. Learn from this school.”) for you and you alone. However, you are the captain with a team that depends upon you on, and off, the court. These notes need to be taken down for them. Selfishness with knowledge is an unforgivable offense to you.

Atsumu moves even closer to you then twists down to see your face. “Aren’t ya supposed to have someone with ya, then? Everyone made a big stink about ya get lost real easy.” He laughs. “Sounded like ya could get lost in a straight hallway. Means we’re supposed to watch out for ya.”

Your face burns even brighter than before. With so little distance between you the smell of his cologne mostly overpowers the sweat of a day’s hard played games. It obstructs your thoughts in a way not even your “space cadet” or (uncharitably termed) “lackadaisical” personality does. He is both too close and too far from you at once.

“I’ve got my phone. “ You stare directly into his eyes. Eye contact is difficult sometimes but so is he. “Why are ya suddenly so carin’? Thought I was supposed to be annoyin’?”

“You were before me and ‘Samu found out ya can play on our level. Turns out Five isn’t so bad.”

There goes another of his offhanded compliments that move with the same speed as his insults. Halfway through Monday had you ready to blow up when he kept yelling at the spikers in-game. They were not your problem per say but who treats their teammates like that? Then came his flurry of insults when he was tossing for you one on one. He claims you jump too quickly so you have to strike back. His sets tosses are too slow and too low. You are not fragile. He should give you something that makes you work.

Atsumu seemed to drag out all of your personality including your unexpected, blistering temper.

"We can't have ya gettin lost here. So, I'll be yer guide."

---

Two hours later he has your back to a wisteria tree holding on to the very last of its blooms. One of his large, calloused hands rest near your head while the other grips your hip. How you are here blurs together like the purples, pinks, muddied whites, and decaying brown petals beneath your feet. You think it involved something about a small public garden followed by a fountain and still blooming trees.

Leaning back he burns kisses from the corner of your mouth and up jaw to lean in closer to the shell of your ear. “Yer hesitatin’,” he whispers with a tone you are too dizzy to follow. “Show me that court confidence yer famous for.”

You have no idea how to tell him that he kisses like he tosses for you. This easy, self-assured way that demands you to recognize that he is the best. He pins you down like he pins the weakest receiver to angle for the perfect toss. Nor how he seems to move through your walls the way he opens the way for his spikers. There is unyielding determination while he drags his lips down the side of your throat while his hand trails up the opposite side of your body. He gives the best and demands to have it reciprocated. 

One of your hands twists up to tangle in dyed blond hair. You yank his burning lips back up to your own. If he kisses like he sets then you will kiss like you spike. Leaping displays of power that allow you to be everywhere at once. A plunging, coursing confidence that no matter what you do things will work out. People accuse you of leaping before you look. They miss that you always glance so you know where to take the best chances. Pausing kills the act. 

Atsumu pulls back to look down at you with mischief alight in his eyes. His lazy smirk. Something in you impresses him. “Knew ya had it in ya to kiss like that.”

You kiss him again to shut him up.

[meganhvisualskills]

Visual Skills:

Reportage Task 1: ‘The dice man cometh’

Tuesday 29th September.

After spending our first Monday completing a few quick and fun warm up tasks, observing and drawing our own hands and classmates, Tuesday we faced our first Visual Skills task: ‘The dice man cometh’.

A task which resulted in us randomly placing ourselves in different parts of Cardiff in small groups of three.

Through a digital dice app, we randomly assigned ourselves: a destination and the time in which we had to draw our surroundings.

The task was beneficial and in a short three hours, developed my contour line drawing skills that little bit more, all the while having a fun and relaxing time doing it.

We started our journey at the university (The University of South Wales). Of course deciding to draw the university itself as it was a clear way to show exactly how the day started.

I started my drawing landscape soon learning the concertina book would look much smoother if it all were complicated portrait. So this first contour line drawing ended up consisting of both portrait and landscape and I think it came out interesting this way, so I don’t label it a mistake because I don’t regret starting at this angle.

The first dice results took us north, we ended up in a very interesting alleyway with a ruin mid construction and the modern buildings in back, showing an interesting comparison of old and new.

I found this second destination quite difficult as it’s hard to show all the rubble and mess through only contour lines. I decided to focus on the main aspects in my surrounds which were the metal scaffolding as it allowed me to show the state of the building without having to draw all the cracks and rubble as well.

With more time, I would have added much more of the detail in my surroundings as I didn’t get half the amount of the interesting aspects visible to me.

The dice took us north again, taking us to a busy road (area name unknown) with the most intricate and most interesting aspect to me being the church.

It was a difficult and probably the most difficult building in the area to draw but I took the challenge up wanting to keep my concertina interesting throughout.

I got in the main features of the church, like the details of the windows and then got in the overall shapes so it didn’t look too unfinished.

I’m overall pretty happy with this piece, though like most pieces here, with more time I would add other features that were in my surroundings into the piece or add detail to the existing pieces.

This is one of my least favourite sections in the concertina as it’s way too simple. I think I could have added more contour lines if given more time. It’s also very hard to make out.

Next we had the option to take ourselves where ever we liked. We chose just outside of the Saint David’s Centre.

I straight away spotted a man and his dog leaning on the wall. With one minute I got down the main outlines, not fitting in much detail but I’m really happy with this one despite the lack of detail. It’s clean and easy to see.

Having the same option again, going where liked, we stopped in the market and I quickly got down the windows and part of the Welsh flag.

This is another one of my favourite sections in the concertina. By this point I was about 3 quarters in and was realising I should focus on key aspects in my surroundings rather than drawing large aspects.

So here you can see a clear example of that, on the left is a singer who was sat right in the centre of the street. For the time the dice gave us, I think I did really well. It’s clear and the proportion is well done. Even with more time, I don’t think I would’ve given him more detail, I may have to the surrounding shops though.

On the right is a statue in Kingsway. I focused on the bottom half knowing I wouldn’t have time for the structured shape of the face. I like the way both thee came out.

I really struggled drawing the Arcade. I can’t place my finger on why exactly but I believe it was the overal perspective. It was a difficult shaped arcade to draw with it having a slight turn.

Though I struggled with this contour peace I think it’s clear and easy to make out like most of my other peace’s that near the end of the concertina, this shows I began to improve.

This was the last and final destination, St Mary Street. I had to draw the flags with it being a main aspect in St Mary’s street, I also captured a few of the many people walking amongst it to show character and life.

With more time I would have added more figures to really show how lively the area was at the time.

On the way to The Castle, I passed a wall full of street art, last minute deciding to place a peace I particle liked in a free space below the previous destination.

This is one of my favourite contour line pieces from the whole concertina.

I was happy and content by the time I’d reached the end of my concertina, looking at it and seeing a slight improvement gradually throughout. Though it was challenging at certain points, it was nice to see it was worth it.

[thelonelybrilliance]

Top 10 ANTM Photos Cycles 1-6

Beauty Shots:

1. Yoanna, Season 2

Even after 20+ cycles, this is probably the most famous ANTM photo of all time. It’s easy to see why. Shades of Linda Evangelista. Futuristic AF. Yoanna’s beautifully symmetrical cheekbones, perfect pout, and piercing eyes transcend the space-age helmet to create an image that radiates both fashion and function. I listed beauty shots first because I love them so much. They’re modern portraits and this one is forever engraved in my mind.

2. Mercedes, Season 2

Mercedes was runner-up in her season, to Yoanna’s win. This shot--from the same shoot as #1--is softer, but no less powerful. Though the judges sometimes criticized three-quarter profile shots, arguing that a lack of eye contact weakened a beauty shot, this is connecting with me. Her cheekbone, the shape of her eyes, the strength of her gaze--it’s all framed beautifully by the delicate wire and her glorious hair.

3. Elyse, Season 1

I’ve never watched Season 1 in its entirety, but Elyse is definitely my favorite. She was quirky, talented, and above all, she knew Tyra & co were full of it. The snake shoot is a little creepy (unlike the spider shoot in Season 3, it doesn’t trigger my terror reflex), yet Elyse shows how it can be done WELL. This is enticingly minimalist. The snake adds interest, but Elyse is in control of the photo. Plus, I love the color palette.

4. Amanda, Season 3

Amanda is famous in ANTM drama lore for being legally blind. This didn’t prevent her from delivering intense eye contact in photos, and her ice-blonde makeover was one of the few successful ones from early seasons (see also: Elyse’s pixie, above). Amanda’s control over her face here doesn’t make it look any less relaxed, gentle, and at peace. I think the hand placement is a little unnecessary, but that’s a minor nit.

5. Joanie, Season 6

Joanie was one of my favorite models from one of my favorite seasons. She had such an exquisite face, as is evident from this photo, and she was a creative and passionate model. This isn’t the most ground-breaking beauty shot ever, but I adore the Grace Kelly vibe and way she she has presented the incredible angles of her face. 

Full-Length Shots

1. Danielle, Season 6

This photoshoot--Falling Fairytale Characters--was a silly concept and I loved it. And when I think of Season 6, this is the photo that comes to mind. Danielle was a worthy winner, prevailing even though she was criticized for everything from her accent to her teeth, and she shows grace, elegance, and visual eloquence in this stunning shot--a shot that transcends the tacky outfit and discount CGI.

2. Joanie, Season 6

The elephant was real. Joanie, however, is the one drawing focus. This is a contorted pose that could easily shift into awkward or ridiculous, but instead, she commands the whole picture.

3. Shandi, Season 2

This is soooo early 2000s, in terms of styling, but Shandi’s broken-down pose and fierce gaze (even though rose-tinted sunglasses) lands this on many lists of all-time shots. 

4. Danielle, Season 6

Danielle, again! In another set and costume that was more goofy than high fashion--are those the same shoes?--she’s managed to be interesting and memorable. I love her upward gaze and the limp yet intentional angles of her hands.

5. Lisa, Season 5

Lisa was loud, zany, and sometimes vulgar. Here, she looks like Christy Turlington. She’s giving shape and dimension to these unappealing clothes, turning the fence into something high art.

[inyri]

Equivalent Exchange (a SWTOR story): Chapter 39- Extinction Burst

Equivalent Exchange by inyri

Fandom: Star Wars: The Old Republic Characters: Female Imperial Agent (Cipher Nine)/Theron Shan Rating: E (this chapter: M. Trigger warning: graphic violence.) Summary: If one wishes to gain something, one must offer something of equal value. In spycraft, it’s easy. Applying it to a relationship is another matter entirely. F!Agent/Theron Shan. (Spoilers for Shadow of Revan and Knights of the Fallen Empire/Knights of the Eternal Throne.)

*

Comments are always appreciated! Visit me at:

Archive of Our Own

Fanfiction Dot Net

*

(Yes, yes, I KNOW. A new job, two moves and a new baby- four months old now- will rather put one off one’s writing game. Mea maxima culpa.)

*

Chapter Thirty-Nine: Extinction Burst

The wire bites in; a memory surfaces.

***

She is sixteen years old.

The final combat examination is tomorrow and she ought to be in quarters but she begged an extra hour before curfew from the matron; the training rooms aren’t kept locked, as a rule, and she needs every minute of practice she can scrounge. If her mark isn’t in the top five she may as well forget the advanced course next year and that means goodbye to any hope of an Intelligence traineeship, which is entirely unacceptable. She hasn’t worked this hard to wind up stamping travel papers on some backwater planet, another factory-molded cog in the machine of the Diplomatic Corps. Father would be so- he’d be-

He’d be-

-angryashameddisappointedIraisedyoubetterthanthispathetic-

( oh, that hurts, oh, oh- a blank space in the memory and then it keeps going, like a stutter in an old recording-)

Not that ImpInt would be any less of a machine- she isn’t so naive as that. This is the Empire, after all.

In any case, her favorite room at the end of the hall’s empty. Setting the program to random- not nearly as good as a live partner but being out of quarters is bad enough, even with permission; any two of them caught together now after stupid Taima ratted out last weekend’s party’d mean a week locked in at least- she squares off against the combat droid.

Half an hour and three-quarters of the way through the fifth training sequence later, sweat prickles on her back beneath her shirt as the door slides open behind her and chill air from the corridor wafts into the room.

“Matron Rossi gave me a pass,” she pants between dodges, lifting her right arm to block and then counter the droid’s swing. It must be one of the patrolling guards, she thinks- heavy steps behind her, booted soles scraping on the duracrete floor, not another cadet soft-footed in standard-issue trainers. Turning around now would be dangerous; whoever it is, they’re disrupting the program. Rather rude. “But it’s in my trouser pocket so you’ll have to wait until the end of this sequence.”

Two more steps, drawing nearer as she aims a punch at the center target- stupid guards, they never did listen worth a damn. Against her better judgment she turns her head to look and suddenly she can’t breathe- something wraps around her throat, stiff and unyielding under her scrabbling fingers, tightening, tightening-

(It wasn’t a wire, then. But she was only a child, really, still fighting training dummies and shooting practice guns at printed targets between arithmetic and elocution and Imperial history lessons. A strap, one would think, ought to have been enough.)

She can’t cry out, she can’t get her hands beneath it, she can’t breathe, oh stars -

The room’s going dark. Did the lights shut off? She can barely see the combat droid as it lurches forward to flank her, still working its way by rote through the program; it’s going to catch her right in the teeth if she doesn’t move but that’s really not going to matter if she strangles first, which frankly seems more likely (what are you doing , stupid girl, think or you’re going to die here, MOVE)-

- until she finally, finally remembers the lesson from three weeks ago’s grappling practice and pivots toward him, throwing her weight sideways as hard as she possibly can.

The pressure eases on her throat just a little. Balling up one fist, she drives it hard into her attacker’s groin. He- thank all the stars it’s a he, that’d have been properly useless on a woman- flinches and she tries to snake her hand up the gap between his arm and body, searching for leverage. Whoever he is, he’s got probably a quarter-meter of height and a few dozen kilograms of weight on her and she’ll never be able to throw him over but if she can at least get him off-balance she might stand a chance. With the little breath she has she tries to scream; he claps a hand over her mouth and she bites down hard, wishing for pointed teeth like Nyssa’s or Dzurai’s because she only tastes leather and not blood and he’s got both ends of the strap in one hand, now, twisting it roughly around her neck and pulling her down until she’s bowed over-

She’s been hit by the droid dozens of times in her training. She remembers the sound and the feel of it, a dense slap of metal on flesh hard enough to leave welts for days, and wonders why it doesn’t hurt this time- she hears it strike home, that same awful thudding sound and then a crack, sharp, like dry kindling breaking underfoot. She should feel it. It should hurt. Why doesn’t it hurt?

The strap slips away, sliding against her skin. The combat droid’s tinny voice chirps accusingly, warning light flashing in the corner of her vision- SEQUENCE FAILED. She needs to run, needs to get away; she starts to stumble toward the door and trips over something underfoot, falling to her knees, crawling.

SEQUENCE FAILED.

Her hand comes down on the man’s face. Frantic, she yanks it away but he doesn’t stir, doesn’t even move and-

SEQUENCE FAILED.

His eyes are open, vague and staring, his head twisted on his neck at an awful angle-

SEQUENCE FAILED.

(It was pure stupid luck how the droid had hit him, though her would-be assassin had had it coming: couldn’t even kill a half-trained girl and he was stupid to boot, leaving the last message from Ellix’s father- fucking Ellix, that lazy little shit, it wasn’t her fault all his family’s money couldn’t buy him decent marks and that she’d thrashed him in the preliminaries last week- on the commpad in his pocket for security to find. But she’d never seen anyone die before. She’d never killed anyone before, even if indirectly, even if it was an accident and she was only trying to run.

He’d had it coming. She had let that thought soothe her in the moments when his face filled her dreams.)

She takes a deep breath in, and screams.

***

It isn’t the first time Nine’s had a garrote around her throat; it likely won’t be the last. But she has two things in her favor that she didn’t at sixteen.

Even as the wire cuts at her skin she can feel the attack angle’s not quite right, meant to snare someone taller- as it is, it nearly hits her jawbone and bites into the soft flesh beneath her chin. On someone Theron’s height- on Theron, it would have been Theron here if she hadn’t intervened - it would have caught him just at the pulse-point, through to the carotids maybe even before he lost his breath. Their nasty little mole sprung his trap on the wrong person and it took him a few seconds too long to realize it, long enough for her to start to shift to counter him. Too bad for him.

The misjudged angle alone might have let her survive, even unarmed. But the second thing in her favor is that unlike all those years ago she’s armed with more than her bare fists tonight and (all right, maybe it’s three things in her favor) she gives precisely zero fucks about how badly she’s about to make him hurt.

Fighting the reflexive urge to grab at the wire, she moves her right hand to her belt instead and draws her knife. It springs into her fingers, blade humming but inaudible beneath the scuff of boots on duracrete and her desperate ragged breaths; she reverses grip and drives it straight backward into her attacker.

(She hopes. If she misses she can strike again, of course, but even at a bad angle the wire’s still making mincemeat of her throat and there’s only so much time before- well. Best not to test whether Valkorion really does mean to keep her alive.)

If Theron’s scars are anything close to par for the SIS course, its agents take twice as many beatings as she ever did in Imperial Intelligence. Whether that’s down to bad luck or subpar training is a matter of debate, but all the thrashings in the galaxy still can’t prepare one for a vibroknife to the groin and when her strike hits home- more in the thigh, really, she feels the blade bite through fabric and into muscle without the telltale skitter-scrape of metal on bone- she twists it hard.

It’s enough. For a fraction of a second the wire pulls tauter and she smells blood before she feels it, trickling down into her collar, but then he lets go with one hand to push her away, to put some distance between himself and her knife. When the blade rips free he snarls, the first meaningful sound she’s heard him make since she entered the room. He hadn’t expected that, clearly. Theron too often only carried his blasters or at best a utility knife and it would have been a tricky shot; if he’d hesitated for even a moment-

Theron always tried to talk his way out of things. But it’s hard to talk with an opened throat.

Her attacker- human or near it in this light, with the sort of face one could pass in the street and forget a moment later- starts to duck back behind the crates that had hidden him initially. As he moves out of sight she reaches for a kolto syringe, then thinks better of it. It would only take a few seconds and he won’t be getting at her neck again but what else is he armed with? A few seconds might be long enough for her to find out the hard way.

The stack of crates casts a dark shadow in the flickering light. He’s only a step or two ahead of her now, slowed by the wound, and she closes the distance with a leap and throws all her weight at his back. Grabbing with her free hand at his collar, she manages a fistful and holds tight to it, clinging fast to drag him down. He staggers and braces himself against a corner as she gets her blade arm up around his throat, then the other.

“Yield,” Nine hisses in his ear. “Or-”

She barely hears the shot go off.

It misses, more or less; the bolt of energy only grazes her right thigh, a split second of heat and pain that she dismisses before the sound of it leaves her ears. He would have had to shoot through himself to hit her anywhere vital but still- now she’s brought a blade to a gunfight and he appears to be going for or.

Oh, well. Too bad for him.

When she won’t let go he turns instead, putting her squarely between his body and the crates behind, and her back slams against the corner with enough force to rattle her teeth once and then again and then again. Between blows she slashes at his side; his throat would be easier but she wants him to talk, not bleed to death on the storeroom floor. The blade skitters off something hard beneath his jacket, raising sparks within the shadows. Armor. This isn’t going to-  

She hits the crate a fourth time and it knocks the air out of her.

Oof. Change of plan, then.

He rocks forward once more. This time, though, she lets go and drops before he can pin her, tucking into a sideways roll that takes her just clear of his feet to the left as she throws her knife to the right. It clatters across the duracrete and with her weight suddenly gone he pauses, turning in the direction of the noise. (It’s a little disappointing he fell for that one, really. Oldest trick in the book.) She flips on her stealth generator in one quick movement and by the time he looks back toward her she’s gone.

“Stop fucking around, Cipher.” His voice is softer than she would have expected and subtly hoarse. Unfamiliar, though clearly he knows her- or of her, at least. “Let’s finish this.”

A single larger storage box, perhaps two meters tall, sits further to her left amid the stacked-up piles. If she can get on top of it she’d have a better angle to get a shot off, or a dart-

“You’re bleeding,” he says, not moving; she takes a silent step toward the box and then another and another, glancing down at the ground around her feet. Maybe she ought to have used the kolto after all; the best stealth tech in the galaxy can’t mask a blood trail. “You think you can hide?”

She’s behind the box now. She reaches up, hands outstretched, gripping the lid. Keep talking, idiot. Keep talking.

Click-click-click, the sound of an augment screwed onto a blaster barrel. “Don’t bother going for the door, by the way. Got it covered.”

Oh, now he’s just being insulting.

Slowly, carefully, silently- her belt clasp knocks slightly against the lip of the lid and she freezes in place, one foot atop the box, until she’s certain he’s not moving toward her- she pulls herself up and edges toward the far side. Where is he? She can’t quite see him. Hiding up against something, maybe- his voice hadn’t moved, but he could be projecting it or- shit, what if he’s got stealth tech, too?

No. He hadn’t been cloaked when he struck at her, she’d just been distracted. He’s hiding, and probably telling the truth about a sightline on the exit: he thinks she’s prey. He thinks she’s wounded, bleeding, frightened. He thinks she’s outmatched and trying to escape, to regroup and find allies to come back and finish the job.

(Cipher, Cipher, run away, live to fight another day. Valkorion’s voice sing-songs in the back of her head. A pithy little rhyme. Isn’t that what you were taught?

Nine grits her teeth. Shall I just let him lop my head off, old man? How long will your ghost last after I die?

Spirit, Valkorion murmurs. Spirit. But I can show you where-

Be silent, she says, and loads a sedative dart into the launcher on her wrist. I’m hunting.)

Crouched atop the box, she scans the room. Think like a ‘pub- he expects her to break before he does. Where would she have holed up, were she him? No stealth and a leg injury- somewhere ground-level but with cover, a niche in the wall or a well-placed column-

There! The tip of a blued-out blaster pistol peeks out beyond the edge of a ration crate, reflecting just enough light to be visible from her perch as it tracks back and forth along the line of the exit door. Target located. Step one, complete. Now to step two- three quick hops ought to put her just above him but only if he doesn’t get punchy at the first hint of a sound, and if he’s already wiggling his fucking gun around like a stimmed-up infantry grunt she’d bet he’s the punchy type.

She can think of a quick way to fix that, of course: can’t get punchy if he can’t hear. Hylo won’t be happy with her, but to mangle the metaphor one can’t make an omelet without breaking a few crates.

Sorry, Hylo.

She pulls a flashbang off her belt and yanks the pin with her teeth, holds the grenade clenched in her fist as she starts to count down the fuse. Five. Four. Three- she lofts the grenade and watches as it soars, landing a meter away and rolling toward the SIS agent’s feet as he peeks out of cover at the noise - two - and she presses her hands firmly over her ears. One.  

The moment the glare fades through her pressed-shut eyelids she’s moving, launching from her perch to the next-nearest stack and then the next, knocked out of alignment by the shockwave and wobbling alarmingly, and then one last leap to just above where her opponent’s now bent over and shaking his head back and forth like a half-stunned bantha. His bowed head creates a perfect target, a wide strip of skin exposed between hairline and collar.

She fires the dart into the back of his neck.

She waits.

He keeps moving for another six seconds (quicker-than-average metabolism; she makes a mental note) before his legs give way and his blaster falls from his limp fingers. Slumped against the crate, he slides down into a half-seated sprawl, head turning slowly from side to side as he squints into the dark.

“Where-?” He’s slurring now. Good. “Gonna kill me now, Cipher? Too ‘fraid to not hide?”

Switching off her generator, she jumps down to the floor beside him and kicks his blaster well out of reach. “Hardly afraid.” She doubts he can even hear her after a flashbang practically to the face. “You’re going to have a nice little nap, and then you and I-” he’s nearly unconscious now- “need to have a little talk.”

He heard that much, at least. Making a face, he grits his teeth and she hears something crack just as his eyes start to roll upward and one cheek starts to spasm.

Oh, for fuck’s sake. Amateur.

“You’re not getting out of this,” she sighs, reaches into a belt pouch for the antitoxin injector she always keeps there, flips the cap back and jams it roughly into the man’s neck, “nearly that easily. Sleep well, agent.” His eyelids flicker, then drift fully shut; she slaps him hard- he deserves it, after all, for what he would have done to Theron and for her mangled throat; she’s still bleeding where the wire bit in and it’s worse than she’d first thought, shirt soaked down to her collarbones now and the smell of her own blood filling her nose even over the lingering oxidizer- and he doesn’t rouse. “We’ll chat again soon.”

No answer.

Good.

“SCORPIO?” She activates her comm but suspects she doesn’t need to. That droid has ears everywhere. “SCORPIO, I need you and Lana at my location- and Doctor Lokin. And a pair of restraining cuffs.”

“Of course, Commander.” A pause, and then- “Transport?”

“And a duffel bag. A large one.”

SCORPIO never smiles; her chassis isn't capable of it. Given how smug she sounds, that's almost certainly for the best. “Of course, Commander. En route."

[aworldoffandoms]

Diagnostic Principles

Chapter 1 –  One Shot, Two Shot...

Authors Note: Hello everyone! I bring you my first ever Open Heart fic! It is a collaborative effort with the lovely and widely talented, @cynicalworlds and I cannot be more excited to go on this writing journey with her! It’s gonna be so much fun! 

Hope you all enjoy it as much as we had fun writing it!

***

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC [Nicolette Valentine]

Word Count: 2, 254

Rating: M (violence, gun violence, blood)

DISCLAIMER: Mention of guns, violence and blood and there may be sensitive subjects/mental health issues explored so some instances in this story might be triggering for some people. Very likely to become NSFW in the near future so anyone who isn’t over 18...maaayybe you shouldn’t read this. Wait a couple years. This story is for mature audiences only so if you cannot handle the subject matters that might be explored -- this isn’t the story for you. Again, please be aware that this story can be triggering to some. You have been warned. 

Summary: A terrible incident has occurred at Edenbrook which puts Ethan and Nicolette in the line of fire...

Tagging people in my normal tag list for TRR because I’m guessing some of you enjoy Open Heart apart from TRR/TRH (hehe). However, if you don’t want to be notified let me know and I’ll remove you or just tell me if you’d like to be added to this OH story :)

Tags: @hopefulmoonobject @annekebbphotography @am-i-invisible777 @blznbaby @khakie4 @lauradowning29 @blackcoffee85 @captain-kingliamsqueen @moneyfordiamonds @super-secret-fandom-blog @jovialyouthmusic @zaffrenotes @ao719 @umccall71 @carabeth @furiousherringoperatortoad @pixieferry @pixelpenny @rainbowsinthestorm @dcbbw @thecordoniandiaries

Disclaimer: All rights reserved to Pixelberry and all characters belong to them. 

CHAPTER ONE - ONE SHOT, TWO SHOT...

Ethan paces the length of their patient's room, his sturdy feet wearing a steady path in the freshly laid laminate floor of the Diagnostics Department. He checks his watch, the polished steel sword-shaped hands ticking over, and shakes his head. Come on, Rookie. 

“Where is she? I sent her down to the lab with those samples over forty-five minutes ago.” 

He stops at the door and pinches the bridge of his nose. She’s the only person that he trusts to get the job done and she’s already failing him with her ineptitude and incompetence. 

He exits the room, long legs carrying him across the corridor to the nurse's station. He clears his throat, he knows that they barely tolerate his attitude some days, and he’s already working against the clock with this one. 

“Marie, would you please call down to the labs and see what is taking Doctor Valentine so long? She should have been back fifteen minutes ago.”

Marie holds her hand up, her index finger raised as if to pause him right there. She’s flicking through her inbox, absorbed in the details of an important email, and he watches her face turns ashen, the blood drains from her features and she looks — pale. 

He furrows his brow and cocks his head to the side. 

“Something the matter?” 

She’s silent and still for a moment, not sure what she should say to him. When she does look up at him, her eyes are softer, somehow — sympathetic. 

“Marie, what’s going on?” 

He doesn’t have time to waste. 

“Doctor Ramsey, the second floor is on lockdown. We’ve just been advised that there’s a man with a gun in the build...”

He doesn’t give her a chance to finish the rest of the sentence. He’s sprinting down the hall to the fire escape, descending the stairs two at a time. 

She’s three floors below him. She’s on the second floor because he’d sent her there no less than three-quarters of an hour ago. 

His coat tails flare behind him like a cape, but he doesn’t feel like a superhero, he feels like a fraud. 

He’s fueled by adrenaline, triggered by fear, and it gives him uncanny strength and speed, even though his heart is in his mouth and the blood rushes in his ears, the rhythm louder than he has ever heard it. 

His palm jabs frantically at the industrial handle and he pushes through the double doors, chaos on the other side. 

“Mister Platt, please. If you’ll just talk to me, I’m sure we can come to some kind of understanding.”

That’s her voice, he’d know it anywhere. He craves it, after having had her in his bed, in his arms, after losing the intimacy that they had waited so long for, the anticipation was almost too much to bear at times, there’s no way he could mistake her for somebody else. 

“Platt. Of course.” 

He spits the name like venom from a viper, his hands ball into fists at his side and he slows his steps as he approaches, trying to diffuse the situation so that nobody gets hurt, least of all, her. 

Ethan extends both hands in front of his body, palms flat and outstretched, long fingers flexed so that he’s displaying neutral posture, he’s not a threat, but he slowly creeps closer to Nicolette, inch by agonising inch. 

“Nigel, why don’t you let Doctor Valentine go and we can talk about this, man to man.” 

The obese man shakes his head, brandishing his weapon. 

“I told you I’d be back, and I told you that you’d be sorry. You two treated me like an idiot, and all you have to say is let’s talk this over like men? No, I’m done talking, Doctor Ramsey. No. More. Talking.” 

Nigel points the pistol at Nicolette’s chest, and she gasps, turns to look at Ethan over her shoulder, sadness etched into her face, in the furrow of her brow and the brimming tears in her eyes. 

It all happens in the blink of an eye, Ethan launches himself across the room, leaping in front of his charge, one arm raised to shield his face as two pops can be heard, echoing throughout the room. 

The first bullet ricochets off his watch, bouncing off the solid sapphire crystal face, and catching Nicolette in the abdomen. 

The second bullet penetrates Ethan’s chest and nestles right next to his heart, shattering his sternum and making him gasp. 

White-hot pain lances through him and fogs his brain as he stares down at his chest and then collapses hard against the linoleum floor. He looks above him in muted horror, his mouth agape in a silent scream. Chaos reigns around him as he lies there, his torso broken and bleeding with no chance of it stopping. He can’t do anything. 

He’s just been shot. 

Goddamnit, Nigel. 

A shadow falls over Ethan as he stares up at the fluorescent lights of Edenbrook, trying to gasp for air. 

Nigel stands over him with a snarl, his chubby face twists in an ugly show of rage. “Talking is for women, Ramsey. You should know that. Now you’ll pay the price. Your whole hospital will.” 

Ethan’s blue eyes widen as he realises the implications of Nigel’s words. 

Is he really going to shoot up the whole hospital? 

Nigel tips the barrel of the gun against his temple but Ethan does not flinch away. “I have half a mind to blow your brains out but…” 

The P.I.T.A sighs forlornly as if what he said next was a true inconvenience for him. “Now I’ve got to find that fine ass looking Chief of yours and do away with her as I did with Valentine. You're practically dead anyway. No use beating an already dead horse.” 

At his words, Ethan glances to the last place he saw her. Ethan’s chest burns like fire but all he wants to do is run to Nicolette. To check to see if she was okay. She has to be okay. From the angle of his head, he can see that blood is accumulating on her white lab coat, the cotton material drenched with it.

She clutches at her stomach as she slowly sinks to the ground, her face marred with agonising pain. 

I need to go to her! Nicolette needs me! 

Nigel smiles a cruel smile as he nudges the barrel against Ethan’s forehead before standing up and heading towards the stairs that led to the upper levels of the hospital where the neurological department resided. 

“It was nice knowing ya, Ramsey!” 

The floor is silent as Nigel ascends the stairs and an echo of a door as it shuts. Nothing happens until a scream filters through his ears and his head snaps to the side and latches on to his co-worker, her red hair matted with blood and her torso drenched with red liquid.

It registers to him that the scream had come from Nicolette and that she is kneeling over him, her face etched in terror. 

“Ethan! Look at me!” 

His gaze finds hers and he smiles, seeing her blue eyes shine with new unshed tears somehow calms him. 

“What the hell were you thinking?! You can’t just dive in front of people like that! It’s stupid!” Nicolette’s voice is filled with righteous anger yet underneath the words she is utterly terrified. 

Maybe it was stupid but he had to. She was his Rookie. No-one was more important to him in that split second than her. 

“Ethan, we have to get you somewhere safe. I need to work on you.” 

Nicolette’s voice shakes as she speaks, her hands frantically skirt around the wound of Ethan’s chest, trying to find leeway in how to fix the problem at hand. Ethan can see her mind ticking away at the diagnoses and warmth spreads through him when her eyes light up.

She knows what to do. 

Nicolette puts a bloody palm to Ethan’s cheek, her gaze meets his and she looks at him softly, her eyes shining with the same emotions they did back when he first had her cradled against him.

“Please, don’t die on me, Ethan. Please. I beg of you. You have to fight. For me? Please—”

She sucks in a sharp breath, her hands going to her abdomen, her eyes widening in shock. Nicolette whimpers and she snaps her eyes shut against the pain.

She sways to the side as if a sudden dizzy spell has overcome her. 

“Woah, hey, come on now, beautiful.”

Bryce kneels beside both of them, drawing a shaky hand through his hair as he tries to assess the situation. There’s so much blood. Nicolette’s hands are stained crimson, sticky and warm. 

Her eyelids feel so heavy, like she just wants to close her eyes and sleep for a week, but she snaps herself out of it, knowing that she has to remain focused on the task at hand if they’re going to help Ethan. 

“Bryce, Ethan was shot. He needs surgery. We have to get him to an OR before he goes into hemorrhagic shock.”

She struggles to pull the lab coat from her shoulders, cursing when the fabric sticks to the crook of her elbow, and she finds herself stuck, like she’s wearing a straight jacket, which wouldn’t be all that inappropriate given the fact that her — that Ethan is bleeding out on the ground right in front of her eyes. 

“Nicolette, we can’t move him. You’re injured and he’s too heavy, the bullet could move and do permanent damage if we even try.”

Tearing off her coat, she folds it into something more manageable and applies pressure to Ethan’s chest. She ignores the painful spasms that crest through her body, involuntary contractions that can only mean one thing. 

“Nic…”

He coughs, and splutters, dark red rivulets of blood seep from his pursed lips and trickle down his chin. 

“Shh. Save your energy, Ethan. I’m right here.” 

He holds her gaze, and she hopes that he can’t see the pain, the fear, the sorrow that is written all over her face. 

“Ethan!”

Harper's voice carries across the space between them as she darts across the room, her arms filled with medical supplies. 

“Doctor Emery, what’s going on?” Bryce questions, his voice tight.

"What we have is a GSW to the chest and a shrapnel wound to the abdomen and we are going to fight like hell to save these two. You hear me?" 

As his eyes adjust to the atmosphere around him he catches a glimpse of the tan surfer-boy type surgical resident, Ethan guesses he’s one of Nicolette’s friends, as he frantically tends to her wounds or tries to at least. 

Ethan’s stomach twists with dread for Nicolette as fear courses through each syllable out of the surgical resident’s mouth. “Nicolette? Nicolette! Stay with me. You’re gonna be alright, okay? Doctor Emery! I can’t stop the bleeding! We need to take her to an OR, now!”

“Bryce… having a miscarriage. Help Ethan… nothing you can do for me.” 

Ethan can’t see her, but he can hear her. He tries to reach for her, but the simple action of elbow extension is excruciating. 

He blinks against the harsh flare of blinding light and tries again. It’s useless, he’s useless, he couldn’t keep her safe and he can’t lift a finger to comfort her. 

Miscarriage. A baby. Had he heard her correctly? His head is so fuzzy, like it’s stuffed full of cotton wool. 

“I’m a little busy here, Lahela!” 

As more orderlies arrive upon the scene, Nicolette and Ethan are ceremoniously hoisted up onto gurneys. They don’t have much time, fifteen minutes had already passed, and time is of the essence.

Though Ethan’s focus is on Nicolette, Harper’s focus is on Ethan and his rapidly deteriorating state. The edges of his vision have darkened and the pain has multiplied as it becomes all he can feel. His whole body is on fire, like each vein is boiling within, with no chance of ebbing away. 

Ethan’s hand lifts upwards towards Harper. He wants to tell her to go and save Nicolette. To save his Rookie and yet the words won’t come. They die in his throat. 

Is he going to die? 

“Now, Ethan...we have to get you to an OR. I can’t do anything right now without the equipment needed.” 

Ethan doesn’t have the strength to nod but he does grip Harper’s hand tightly and she nods as she gives him a smile. 

“Okay. Let’s go, Lahela!” 

Ethan isn’t sure how much time passes but the black abyss that creeps at the edge of his vision becomes all-encompassing and he has nothing left to do but yield to it. The sounds of Harper, and raised shouts fading until he is pulled under completely.

Beside him, Nicolette is seduced by the sights and sounds of the hospital as they morph into the peaceful lull of white noise. Her heart is shattering into a million shards of glass, each new piece far more serrated than the last.

Breathing masks cover their mouths and their noses, she expects to feel no pain during surgery, but she knows that the moment she wakes again, the agony will be more than she can bear.

She’s sleepy, so sleepy now. Her heavy lids droop and her lashes flutter against her cheeks, and the last thing that enters her mind before she’s completely incapacitated and rendered unconscious is his name.

[amandaoftherosemire]

Lightning Strikes Part Seven

Fandom: Marvel Avengers AU

Pairing: Thor Odinson X Reader

Characters: Thor Odinson, Loki Odinson, OFC Astrid, Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers

Author: @amandaoftherosemire

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 6,013

Format: Series (Complete)

Warning: Language, angst, the appearance of infidelity,

Summary: Ready to finally give Thor an answer to his request that you move in with him, you travel to New Asgard. Once there, however, you receive information that explains a lot even as it creates new questions. Regardless of the answers, what you discover has the capacity to change how you feel about everything.

A/N: I want to start by saying I’m sorry. That said, this chapter has its place and I promise that I’m building to something worthwhile. I also swear I didn’t do this just to be a dick. I’m perfectly capable of that, but that’s not what I was going for here. 😉

Part Six: Crucible here

Sublimation

Loki walked out of the manor house to meet the jet from New York, a wickedly delighted grin on his face. He'd been anticipating this day for nearly a month, ever since you'd told him the plan. Now that you were here, the fun could really begin.

The jet was of Wakandan design and manufacture and a gift to the Avengers from King T'challa to aid you in your new duties. It had taken the better part of a month to learn how to fly the thing but being the pilot when this baby kicked into gear was out-fucking-standing. You were now the point of contact between the Avengers compound in New York, New Asgard, and Wakanda, hence the gift. You had a base of operations in all three locations, at least you would once you talked to Thor about it, but were expected to spend most of your time in New Asgard, handling what you could remotely and traveling when necessary.

As soon as you'd gotten back to New York from your vacation with Thor, you'd gone to Pepper. You'd told her the entire situation and asked for her help in figuring out a solution. Pepper, both a powerful and ambitious businesswoman and a quietly tender-hearted romantic, had immediately put her phenomenal brain to the task. With the full power of Pepper Potts behind you, it hadn't been too difficult to find a solution that should work for everyone. Thor didn't know yet, but since he'd asked you if you'd decided yet every time you talked, you figured he'd be on board.

You'd been putting him off, gently telling him each time that you still hadn't figured it all out. You'd wanted to surprise him when everything was in place. You were here today because everything was in place. All that was left was to talk to Thor.

You sauntered out of the open hatch into the balmy ocean air, your bag over your shoulder and eyes shaded against the early summer sun, a cheerful grin on your face.

With a sweeping and dramatic bow, Loki offered his arm. You took it as you laughed up into dancing emerald eyes. “Pet,” he purred, mirth and mischief ripe in his tone. “Welcome home.”

Loki filled you in on the gossip as he walked you to the rooms you normally had each time you visited, making you laugh with catty sotto voce commentary on the various people you passed on the way. Once there, however, you chased him off, wanting to change before you saw Thor. Loki had gallantly offered to go push his brother out of his office for you before sauntering out. You frowned after him, mildly suspicious. But without anything else to go on, you opted to chalk his oddly helpful behavior up to pleasure at having you here.

You didn't fool yourself. Whatever Loki felt for you was real and deep, but you also knew that he was pleased to have you there because you entertained him. He had made no secret that he was excited to have a partner in crime, confident in his ability to draw you into his schemes and games. You had to admit it depended on how funny and ultimately harmless his schemes and games were. You had no doubt that the two of you would find plenty of mischief that would satisfy you both and hopefully harm none.

You pulled a sleeveless lace shirt and bustle skirt from your bag, getting ready to wiggle out of your jeans. You wanted to be comfortable while traveling, but pants were always more trouble than they were worth around Thor. To top it off, you hadn't seen each other in a couple of weeks, the only thing that could test his patience and spur him to anything you considered urgency. You flipped the button open on your jeans as you debated the merits of underwear when a beam of sunshine hit something shiny on the table next to the bed.

Curious, you rounded the bed to approach the table. You would have ignored it, but the curtain was almost too perfectly parted to allow a beam of light to fall upon the object. Once next to it, you could see that the object was an earring, what looked to be a pretty one carat diamond. Not only was it not yours, it was also perfectly angled to shine upon the opposite wall. Even had your body not gotten in the way, there would have been no way to be in these rooms any time in the afternoon and miss the thing.

You stood, looking at the small item, considering the wealth of meaning that could imbue anything, should the circumstances be right. Or wrong. You don't know how long you stood there, mulling over the weight location, position, identity of owner, etc. should each have in the calculation of how big an explosion should occur when you next got your hands on either Odinson.

At your back, the bedroom door opened to Astrid, her arms full of clean towels. The last time you'd seen Thor, you'd asked him to assign Astrid to you whenever you were in New Asgard. You were unsurprised to see her, as you'd seen her in the hall on your way in. Astrid, however, looked confused to see you here, then concerned when her eye fell on the sparkling jewelry at the obvious focus of your attention.

"Lady Y/N!" she said softly, her voice low and warm. One of the things you liked about Astrid was her calm no matter how you surprised her. "These are no longer your rooms." You weren't ready to speak, holding on to your temper was difficult enough, so you tilted your head in question.

Another thing you liked about Astrid was her talent at reading nonverbal communication. She stepped forward and slipped her arm around your waist, supporting you without words as she answered. "His majesty commanded that you be put in his private quarters from now on," she explained.

"I see." You pulled away slightly to turn and look at her, your eyes catching and boring into hers. She was on the tall side of average for a woman, a couple of inches under six feet, well-built and strong. She had a lovely, sweet face, with charming dimples that you knew she used as a distraction. Even in the little time you'd gotten to spend with her, you had somehow become genuine friends. This, however, was the first time she looked into your eyes and saw what her king found so compelling about this funny little human. Your gaze was fierce and held a strength she hadn’t expected.

"And was I the last to have these rooms?" you asked, your voice hardening as you saw the change in her eyes. You knew she'd liked you before; your triumph was that she now respected you. Your eyes fell back to the earring on the nightstand.

"No." Astrid's voice had dropped to a sympathetic murmur. "The Lady Jane Foster visited last week." Her arm came back around you and squeezed gently at the tremor that rocked through you. Her tone took on a touch of urgency. "But she slept in this bed. And his majesty slept in his."

You huffed out a breath and even you didn't know if it was a laugh or a sigh. You reached out and snagged the earring, tucking it into your pocket, before turning into Astrid's arms to give her a quick hug. "Astrid, I adore you." She hugged you back, but you could see the worry in her eyes. You smiled sunnily and turned to snag your bag. "Let's go to his majesty's quarters and I'll give you your present."

Astrid's eyes widened. You'd told her the last time you'd visited that you would bring her some human designer shoes so she could see them for herself. Astrid was a fashionista, but specifically for shoes. You had gone with Natasha to her favorite boutique and picked out the prettiest, shiniest, crystal embedded Jimmy Choos with Astrid's caramel hair and bright blue eyes in mind.

The pictures of Human Mistress Guy tucked between the shoes weren't necessarily for Astrid, but you knew she'd be happy to take responsibility for them. Turned out HMG was more interested in enforcing Asgardian social norms than he was in living up to them.

Though most were unaware of it, you had a vast, and some would say insidious, network of connections. You had once been the gatekeeper to Pepper Potts, CEO of Stark fucking Industries and one of the most powerful people in the world. Not only that, you had facilitated the connection between the Avengers and SI, you knew people who knew people who knew people. You could find dirt on almost anyone, almost anywhere.

You figured Astrid would be the best person to ask how her people would feel about the pictures of Human Mistress Guy with his very own human mistress.

Loki stood at the door to his brother's office, smirking as Thor worked at the Stark designed touch computer, clearly in a terrible temper. Thor delegated as much as he could, but he had prepared to be king of Asgard when she was whole and strong. Here on Earth he was, in some ways, painfully out of his depth. And he hated the bureaucracy that went along with ruling more than almost anything.

Loki's voice held a light taunt as he spoke into the silence. "Your delicious little human has arrived, brother."

Thor didn't look up. He knew you were coming; you'd sent him a text on the phone you’d made him take. His lips twitched at the memory of your utter disdain for any form of communication he had suggested other than the little plastic and glass box. The twitch turned to a smirk as he remembered how'd you'd changed his mind about the device when you'd introduced him to sexting.

“I am aware,” Thor growled, annoyed with the world. He was annoyed that he had to deal with this if he wanted to spend the rest of the day as he wished, in bed with you. He was annoyed that you still hadn't given him a straight answer about whether you'd live with him. He was annoyed with himself for not being honest with you about everything. He was annoyed with Loki for being so obvious in his regard and pursuit of you.

"I’ll greet her when I can do it properly." Thor didn't try to stop the smug smile from curving his mouth, even as he kept his eyes on the screen in front of him. He couldn't help but remind his brother that though you may be Loki's pet, you were Thor's lover.

"Suit yourself." Loki was unamused and equally annoyed with Thor. There were few things that Loki found distasteful, self-righteous hypocrisy was one of the few. As long as Thor acted as though he had the moral high ground, Loki would continue to remind him that he was always ready to take you from him. "I certainly intend to."

"Loki." Out of patience, Thor pushed back from the screen, causing it to blip away, and turned to fix Loki with an angry glare. "Why are you trying to make me jealous?"

"Why should you be jealous, brother? After all, I befriended her on your orders, did I not?"

***

You were almost to Thor's office, your hands in your pockets, the right toying with the earring there when the sound of raised male voices had you lifting your brows. It occurred to you that living with both Thor and Loki was not going to be peaceful. Up until this afternoon, you'd been nothing but excited.

The discovery that Thor had had his ex-girlfriend as a guest but had not mentioned it either before or after the fact had put something of a damper on your enthusiasm. However, Astrid's sincere and sweet rush to reassure you had given you pause. You were, at least, determined to remain calm as you asked Thor what the hell. You would lose your shit only if and when his explanation proved inadequate. As for the location of said earring, you knew you had a tendency towards cynicism, but you doubted it had been left in that exact place on accident. The only question was whether Dr. Foster left it there, or Loki.

You had every intention of asking Loki what the hell, also.

Astrid had been utterly delighted, both with her shoes and with the pictures. She'd had a run-in of her own with HMG and was happy to help her new best friend (she really loved the shoes) get revenge for both of them. Astrid knew exactly which gossipy guard's sister was the best friend of HMG's wife's personal assistant. You figured that would be enough degrees of separation to keep both you and Astrid out of it.

Your stomach was already churning, and the dread was shimmering up your spine at the tone in Thor's voice when you got close enough to understand what he was saying. At the words Loki, why are trying to make me jealous? your feet slowed without your brain getting involved in the situation. At Loki's response, you stopped in your tracks. After all, I befriended her on your orders, did I not?

You'd never before known that you could actually feel your heart break. For all that emotion came from the mind, there was still a pain in the chest. Even as the betrayal crashed down upon you, as your breath caught at the enormous agony of it, a calm and detached part of your mind wondered at the physical reaction to something wholly emotional. You latched onto that calm and detached part, knowing only that would get you through the next moments.

You flinched at the sarcasm you could hear in Thor's voice, the warm rumble sounding threatening for the first time. "It’s evidently been a terrible hardship for you."

"‘Charm her, lure her, seduce her if you can.’ Your words, brother." Loki's voice was a taunt and had you leaning on the hallway wall, needing the support to stay on your feet. Every word felt like a blow. "Only now, when I’ve proven her true, you want to pretend I’m encroaching?"

Your eyes closed at the words proven her true. The fucking hypocrite hadn't trusted you but had been lying to you the entire time.

"If you're not encroaching, why do you seem determined to prove her untrue?" Thor's voice held a bitterness you'd never heard before. You couldn't understand why Thor had lied to you, how he could claim to love you when he so obviously didn't trust you. Unless this had never been about you, in which case you were what you had always truly feared: a pet, nothing more than a rope for two spoiled boys to play tug-of-war.

"If you think so highly of her," Loki's voice was bored, as though he were only asking to be polite, "why is it so hard to believe that I might simply like the silly creature?" Thor didn't respond, but the look that flickered across his face sparked Loki's temper. For the first time, he sounded like cared. "It’s not, and that’s the problem. I wasn’t supposed to be myself when I charmed her, was never supposed to actually get attached in any way." There was a pause, then he continued, his voice calm and mocking once more. "My apologies. In the future, you may want to make such commands explicit."

You'd had enough. "But then how would he maintain plausible deniability?" The words were out of your mouth before you had a chance to think about them, but you didn't want them back. You were angrier than you'd ever been in your life and you knew you needed to use it before it ran out and left you the broken wreck you knew were going to become. You'd never had two people break your heart on the same day, but here you were. Maybe it was what you deserved for presuming to fly so close to the sun. You pushed off the wall and closed the last couple of feet to Thor's open office door.

You hoped that one day the sight that met your eyes would seem comical. Both men looked dumbfounded, as though they had been so caught up in their argument that they had completely forgotten the possibility that they might be overheard. The expression of dawning horror on Thor's face only hurt, so you focused instead on Loki and on the flicker of sly satisfaction you saw fly across his face. You used the rage it inspired to dismiss him as unimportant, knowing it would infuriate him more than anything else. Frankly, in this moment he was unimportant; Thor's betrayal so much worse because you truly hadn't seen it coming. You'd always expected Loki to return to form in one way or another.

"You." You fixed Loki with a sternly disappointed glare. You pushed unsurprised exasperation into your tone, and by the irritated flare of Loki's nostrils, you'd scored your point. "I… can’t. With you. Today. I’m too pissed and need to focus. Take the escape hatch and be grateful."

To your surprise and secret gratitude, Loki said nothing more, merely inclined his head and walked out. You stepped back to let him pass, and it took everything you had to not punch him as hard as you could in his sexy brooding poet face. Even the knowledge that you'd be more likely to damage your hand than his face couldn't stop you; only your stubborn pride could do that.

Once Loki was gone, you stepped into the room. Thor still stood behind his desk where he'd stood to yell at Loki when, with a mocking lift of your eyebrow, you pointedly closed the door behind you. As you walked forward to sit in one of the chairs in front of the desk, Thor finally spoke. "Plant, I—"

"Do not call me that." You cut him off quickly, unable to stand the sound of that nickname in the rumble you loved so dearly. The sound of your heart crumbling apart lived in that beloved thunder. You leaned forward to set the earring on the desk in front of you. "Do you know what that is, Thor?" He didn't answer, only closed his eye. "No? You want to guess where I found it?" Your voice was sweet as candy laced with strychnine. At the sound, Thor dropped into the chair, resigned to his fate. Hopeless. "Or do you already have a pretty good idea?"

You waited until Thor's eye opened and met yours. He'd never seen you so angry, but he wasn't a fool. Your eyes were also glittering with tears. His muscles were bunching to propel him to action, his heart leading and desperate to soothe away the desolate look in your eyes, but the hardness on your face stopped him from moving. Harshly, you accused, "And you have the nerve to distrust me?"

"I'm sorry."

"Oh, well then." You scoffed, and mockery coated every word. "You're sorry. Problem fucking solved." You sat back, spread out in the chair in a posture of furious disdain. "I was on my way down here to ask you about that," you gestured, and Thor saw something in your eyes he'd never thought to see, coldness, "to give you a chance to explain. Loki may have called me 'pet', Thor, but you made me feel like one."

You reached out and picked up the earring, twirling it between your fingers by the post and watching the afternoon light sparkle through its facets. Such a pretty thing to be the beginning of the end. You looked up when Thor remained silent, and the pain on his face only spiked your rage. A snarl in your voice and on your lips, you went on. "I came here today to tell you that I’d figured it out, and I'd done it. I’d rearranged my entire life for you. I thought it would be worth it, because I thought the one person in this world that mattered didn’t see me as a pet. I am not surprised that I’ve lived to regret that decision, but I am perturbed that it happened so quickly."

Thor's continued silence, his face growing more and more white with every word out of your mouth, his face twisting in pain, only served to pour gasoline on the inferno about to burst into full and cheerful flame. "I know you've got trust issues. I get it. But that does not excuse what you've done." You were nearly yelling now, but it was the disgust that cut Thor to the quick. "Seduce her if you can!? How dare you!? How fucking dare you!?"

You were shouting at this point, but you couldn't stop yourself. Thor finally spoke, the pained rage in your voice cutting through the agony blocking his own. "Y/N--"

"No!" You bellowed to cut him off as you shot to your feet. You had thought you wanted him to speak, to explain himself, but the moment you heard your name in his gorgeous rumble, you knew if you let him continue you'd end up sobbing and you would not shed a goddamn tear until you were back home. You closed your eyes and took a shaky breath. "No," you said again, more calmly and opened your eyes to look down into the face you adored. "No, Thor, I will not move here, I will not live with you." You tossed the earring onto the desk. "I can't trust you. I told you; betrayal is a dealbreaker. Commanding your brother to attempt to seduce me is a fucking betrayal. Goodbye, Thor."

You turned and walked toward the door. Your hand was on the knob when Thor spoke. "Please." You paused, the anguish in the single word catching at your weeping heart and stopping you even against your will. "I don't want to lose you." You closed your eyes against the tears threatening to fall but didn't turn around.

"Then you shouldn't have lied to me."

As the door closed behind you, Thor sat alone in silence, watching the earring sparkle mockingly on his desk.

You walked quickly, but at a pace carefully under a run. You could still see through the sheen of tears coating your eyes, but the world had become a wobbly, warped mess. You strode with purpose back to Thor's quarters to pick up your bag, determined to leave as little of yourself here as possible. You'd never had a heartbreak like this, the kind that's so huge it feels like grief, like you were mourning the future you would now never have.

Worse, to find out that so much of what had come to this point had been, if not a lie, tainted with dishonesty was yet another thing to grieve, the death of all you'd thought you had. Once you had your bag, you looked neither left nor right, acknowledged no one as you walked quickly to the door that led to the jet and escape.

"Lady!?" The sound of Astrid's sweet voice stopped you at the door to the vehicle bay. At this point, she was the only Asgardian with that ability. She ran up, her face stricken, and you realized you really had made a friend here. You choked back a sob and threw your arms around her in a quick hug.

"I have to go, but I'll be back, I promise." You didn't know how you got the words out past the tears clogging your throat, but Astrid seemed to understand. She nodded and hugged you back, but she didn't try to hold you when you pulled away to run outside.

As soon as the jet was at its cruising altitude and pointed toward New York and home, you put on the autopilot, buried your face in your hands. You couldn't cry yet; you had to stay calm until you were no longer flying a jet tens of thousands of feet above the surface of the Earth. Your heart was wailing, but you held on but for an occasional choking sound that escaped every time you forced the shriek of pain back down.

Bucky was waiting with open arms as soon as you stepped off the jet. You had called him while on your way home, told him what had happened. He'd been appropriately infuriated on your behalf and had promised to meet you as soon as you arrived. He was as good as his word, enfolding you in muscular, comforting arms and holding you close as you finally let go and sobbed. He basically carried you inside, but instead of taking you to your rooms, he took you to his and Steve's.

You didn't argue, especially when Bucky more or less handed you over to Steve, who also folded you close and rocked you back and forth. You couldn't stop crying, but Steve's arms were even more comforting than you'd imagined. You were too wracked with grief to notice when Steve settled you on the couch, but you noticed Bucky's arms coming around you from the other side. Squeezed between super soldiers, you poured onto them all the anguish in your broken heart.

After you calmed, Bucky made you laugh with the offer of triple chocolate brownies and four different kinds of Ben and Jerry's. It healed your heart just a little when he turned on Hot Fuzz, handed you a glass of pinot noir and a brownie, then settled onto the couch at your back, with your legs across Steve's lap. Though it was only a few months ago, it felt like a million years when you'd told Bucky about your Breakup Triage Kit: comedy, wine, and chocolate. You adored him for remembering and taking care of you.

You were fairly embarrassed when you woke up the next morning still on the couch, laying between Bucky's legs with your back against his chest, his flesh arm around you under your breasts. Steve was laying with his arms around your hips and his head on your stomach. Bucky's metal hand rested on Steve's shoulder while Steve's temple rested against Bucky's flesh arm. You would sneak out, but you were completely tangled up in the two men. You'd never been this physically comfortable with either man, but apparently comforting you through a broken heart had changed your relationship. You hoped to god it wasn't going to cause any more grief or drama; you needed a fucking break already.

The sound of someone clearing their throat made you groan aloud. With a roll of your eyes, you let your head fall to the side to meet the mischievous emerald gaze of the lithe god standing across the room. He looked both amused and annoyed, and to your surprise seemed to be keeping the men pinning you down from waking.

"Ahem." His lips curled in a mocking smile as he took in the tangle in front of him. The three of you were fully clothed, and there was nothing sexual about the way either man was embracing you, but there was something undeniably intimate about the curl and curve of bodies asleep together on the couch. Loki filed the image of this tableau away in case it became necessary or amusing to describe it to someone.

You closed your eyes in response to that mocking smile, wondering when exactly your life had become a clusterfuck. "Oh, for fuck's sake,” you groaned, insult and disbelief warring for control.

"Charming, as always, my dear." Loki chose not to comment on your current… predicament… aware that his silence would be more effective in what he wanted to achieve here today.

You rolled your head back to stare at the ceiling. It was more comfortable here, your head pillowed comfortably on Bucky’s sternum. You could hear the taunt in Loki’s voice, the invitation to play, but you could not find within you any answering warmth. You were too sad and too tired to care about dancing to his tune for any reason. Your voice infinitely weary, you sighed. "Loki, why are you here?"

Loki was sorry to hear the exhaustion in your voice. He adored trying to outwit and out-manipulate you and he hated hearing his favorite adversary so weak. His voice softened along with his guarded heart. "I wanted to see you."

"Why?" You wanted to look at him, surprised to hear sympathy in his tone, but you didn't have the energy to really care. You'd long ago purged all the rage and pain in tears and sleep and all you had left was a kind of vaguely exasperated apathy. You had no defense, no deftness, and so opted to not even try to dance or dodge but spoke bluntly with no attempt to hide how you felt.      

"You know why." Loki's voice was gentle, and you frowned at what sounded like sincere remorse in his tone. You couldn't dare believe that he actually felt sorry for lying to you, but you found yourself wondering if you could get a straight answer out of him for once.

"Did you put the earring on the nightstand so that it would catch the light?”

"Yes." You tilted your head to look at him again and he smiled slightly. "I wanted you and Thor to fight on your first day there so you'd spend the evening with me, instead. I thought it'd be funny."

You were scowling warily at Loki's half-smile, confused by his posture of honest confession. "Ha." Loki snorted, and your lips twitched against your will. His smile started to widen until you asked your next question, still mired in skepticism despite the lack of artifice. In fact, his guileless demeanor only exacerbated your suspicions instead of alleviating them. "Did you plan for me to overhear you and Thor?"

For the first time since you'd met him, his eyes softened with what looked like real tenderness. If you didn't know better, you'd think Loki genuinely cared for you. "No," he said, gently, and part of you wanted to believe him, "I wanted him to tell you the truth. I didn't want you angry enough to leave."

You told yourself to harden yourself against him, that he was still playing with you, but you heard yourself ask, "Why do you care?" Your heart was aching; Thor wasn't the only one who'd broken your heart. Though you'd never been foolish enough to fully trust Loki, you'd believed his feelings for you, his friendship, at least, to be true.

Loki waved his hand dismissively, and you saw his discomfort with the honest emotion in the gesture. "Because you're my pet."

You would not play along with this anymore. You would not allow anyone, even in jest, to make you something less. "No, I'm not," you answered and turned your face all the way to the wall. When you'd felt respected, cared for, it had been one thing. Discovering how little regard either man had had for your feelings and dignity made the 'pet' joke a lot less funny.

Loki had never heard your voice so cold, was shocked by the finality in the dismissive movement of your head. He hadn't known, when his brother asked him to befriend you, that he would come to like you. If he had known a human could charm him so, he'd have been on guard against just such an eventuality, because to deliberately deceive in just such a way requires detachment. Because he hadn't known, you'd gotten under his skin. He didn't want to lose his friend.

Loki sighed, and the melancholy in his tone almost had you turning your head. You held out, but surprise had you listening despite yourself. "Because I’m actually quite fond of you, my silly little human."

Your head snapped back around. You couldn’t help it. Loki had never given you so clear a glimpse into the man that lived behind the mask. He was giving you what he could, and the part of you that reminded you to love people as they are rather than how you want them to be spoke up for the first time in Loki’s defense.

That little voice pointed out that you’d never expected honesty from Loki, one of the many reasons you’d still not act on any attraction. A dealbreaker is a dealbreaker, after all. But for a friend you could make an exception when deceit is a fundamental aspect of the friend’s personality.

You also didn’t expect Loki to apologize. You’d no more expect the sun to apologize for shining, or fire for burning. His very presence, his careful words told you he cared.

Unless he’s up to something and needs to charm his way back into our good graces. The cynical voice in your head may have been unkind, but she wasn’t wrong. Still, trying to figure out what mischief Loki was up to was part of the fun of being his friend. You wouldn’t change him for worlds. You knew you’d end up forgiving him.

But not today.

“Well, now.” Your voice was dry and mostly unamused, but the strident tone told Loki his work here was done. “This is a red-letter day. You gave me the unvarnished truth and you were mostly honest about your feelings.” Loki shot you an unrepentant grin and you had to fight to keep the sneer in your face. The burning insult still raged under the surface of your skin, however, and kept you sarcastically steadfast even as you continued. “I love you, too, Loki. I'm so mad at you right now that I could strangle you, but I love you.”

Loki was shocked to hear the words pass your lips. Even as part of him cringed away, a small but vocal part of him gloried in the word, swamped in gratitude for your open and generous heart. “I’ll be waiting when you forgive me, dear one.”

With a last unusually warm and sweet smile, Loki shimmered into nothing. The next moment, both Bucky and Steve began to stir. Steve’s pretty face lifted, a red crease imprinted in his cheek from a wrinkle in your t-shirt.

Bucky’s voice rumbled at your back. “This is gonna sound weird, but, doll, is your superpower being insanely comfortable? I slept like a baby.”

“Me, too,” Steve said, bashfully, carefully and respectfully disentangling himself and allowing you to sit up. “I don’t know how that happened, but it was nice.”

Your broken heart healed a little at the sweetness of these two, the kindness they’d shown in tucking you between them and protecting you until you could stand on your own.

Your voice low, and a little shy as the change in your friendship was still new and uncertain, you murmured, “Thank you. Both of you.” You leaned forward and kissed Steve on the cheek, then turned to do the same for Bucky. “Nobody has ever taken care of me like that before.”

(Except Thor.) You had a new train of thought to torment yourself with now: constant reminders of everything you had and lost with Thor. Wasn’t this going to be fun. You focused back on Steve, who looked as though he could hear your thoughts and had nothing but sympathy. “I needed my friends last night, and you guys more than delivered.”

You patted both men, Bucky’s arm and Steve’s chest, before you stood up, a little wobbly still. Each held out a hand to help steady you.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me,” you said, smiling, and if the smile was heartsick around the edges, neither of them would be rude enough to mention it, “I’m going to go cry in the shower, then I’m going to make an absolutely enormous breakfast for my heroes.”

You weren’t entirely certain why, but you decided to keep the visit from Loki to yourself.

Part Eight: Aphelion here 

Taglist:

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[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 045: Superhero Names

Previously on BnHA: Everyone licked their emotional wounds from the sports festival arc. You wouldn’t think a simple sports festival would cause so many emotional wounds, but here we are. All Might hugged some kids. Iida visited his brother in the hospital. Todoroki visited his mom. Ochako’s parents came to cheer her up. Deku ate dinner. Bakugou brushed his teeth.

Today on BnHA: Aizawa wears an infinity scarf. Deku gets mobbed by people on a train. The draft pick totals are announced. The kids pick their superhero aliases. Somehow this ended up being one of my longest recaps ever because I went off on tangents like three separate times, talking about everything from the new volume’s character page to the stuff I think I might have been spoiled for by accident. Like, when I went back to edit this it was like whoa.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 104 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

looks like it’s the start of another new volume (and arc!), so let’s see what extras we’ve got today!

well there’s not much end-of-volume-5 stuff, but I did find this fascinating

honestly, this wrapped up in less than 20 chapters though. to me that’s incredibly fast. either way, I have to hand it to him, because the pacing was just about perfect. nothing dragged out to the point of becoming boring, and we didn’t waste time on anything we didn’t need to see, but we did get to see just about everyone have at least one cool moment. that’s about all you can ask for, really.

and lord, have you ever heard of a final battle in a tournament arc lasting just a single chapter?? I still can’t get over that ending. that just flew in the face of everything I’ve come to anticipate from a Jump manga, and once I realized what was happening it was as much a thrill as it was a shock.

apparently Endeavor was on the back of this volume cover the whole time. hey, Endeavor!! [deep breath] ...FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUU

all right, on to the new volume!

goddamn this series’s cover art is something else

is Iida even wearing his glasses here?? (ETA: nope!) 

he looks so cool and barely like the usual Iida at all

that Stain guy really fucking looks like Small Gia you guys. I apologize in advance if this ends up being something I never stop talking about

and I see Deku’s back in his original costume, but with a couple of upgrades. got what appears to be new gloves, some lines on his jumpsuit that I don’t remember seeing before (ETA: because they’ve changed color), reinforced collar/shoulder protection, and did he always have those big knee guards before? at any rate, it’s a vast improvement on the original look and I approve

what is this

why would Ochako dress up as a giant cancelled sign

and Deku’s Tokoyami hat is both so cute and so disturbing to me. cute because it’s so damn cute look at it, and disturbing because it’s realistic to the point of looking like his actual severed head almost

also are they working at a 7-11 or something. lol

volume title: “Struggling.” I’m feeling it. very relatable

all of the characters are wearing street clothes on the character page!

oh my god Aizawa’s infinity scarfff

SHOUJI WITH ONE OF HIS INFAMOUS PONCHOS

I CAN’T TELL IF DEKU’S ARM IS FUCKED UP FROM THIS ANGLE DAMMIT

DOES HORIKOSHI HAVE SOMETHING AGAINST DRAWING JACKETS/SWEATERS/BUTTON-DOWN SHIRTS THAT ARE A NORMAL LENGTH

BAKUGOU WILL JUST ALWAYS BE WEARING HIS PANTS LIKE A GOOD 3 INCHES BELOW WHERE THEY ACTUALLY SHOULD BE HUH

SHOUTO WITH THE THREE-QUARTER-LENGTH SLEEVED SWEATER. I DON’T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY ABOUT THAT. IT LOOKS REALLY GOOD ON HIM THOUGH

AIZAWA’S SCARF DESERVES ANOTHER MENTION EVEN THOUGH I ALREADY MENTIONED IT. BRO LOOKS LIKE LENNY KRAVITZ AND I’M HERE FOR IT

IT’S A CRIME THAT SO MUCH OF JIROU IS HIDDEN BEHIND IIDA’S GIANT FORTY-YEAR-OLD MAN HEAD BECAUSE I LOVE HER FASHION SENSE SO MUCH AND THAT JACKET LOOKS SO FUCKING FINE ON HER WORK IT GURL!!

LAST BUT NOT LEAST ALL MIGHT WITH THAT BLAZER. ALL MIGHT YOU LOOK SO DAMN GOOD, IF YOU WERE A PHASER ON STAR TREK YOU’D BE SET TO STUN MY GOOD MAN

like a fool, I didn’t scroll past the table of contents quickly enough and my eyes glanced over the title “Gran Torino Appears.” and that shit sounds fucking familiar. some part of my brain that picks up on subconscious clues is telling me that this person is All Might’s master. guess we’ll find out probably in the next chapter. or at the end of this one maybe

Deku is on the train to school and people are recognizing him

“wow you’re that crazy kid from the sports festival, right? you were just sooooo crazy you little wackadoodle.”

but actually he seems to be getting praise from them! some guy is giving him a thumbs up

and now he’s surrounded

this might not be so good, actually. these people are fairly harmless, but this could get out of hand pretty quickly. there’s a reason celebrities always have bodyguards around. and we live in a world without supervillains. these kids are just kids, but some of them have already become household names and faces, and we know that at least a couple of them have also attracted some villainous interest as well. they’re safe enough at school with the security there (I know, I know, but they must have learned their lesson after the last time), but outside is a different story

I’ve been meaning to bring this up at some point, and now seems as good a time as any: another thing I’ve been spoiled about is the fact that I’m pretty sure at some point, some or possibly all of the kids from class A move into U.A. dorms. I’ve seen dorms mentioned enough that I’m pretty sure it’s a canon thing (I wasn’t sure at first). so since then I’ve been on the alert for this to come up, and if/when it does, I’m thinking something like this might be the reason why

and since we’re on the subject, here is a brief list of the other (still relatively few) things I’ve been spoiled for/sort of spoiled for:

Aizawa’s ridiculously hot ponytail. also a scar that’s under his right eye, but I’m thinking that he probably got that during his fight with Noumu and I just haven’t seen it yet because he still had bandages on his face during the festival

at some point there is going to be something really angsty involving Bakugou. because I know I’ve had an irrational love for him since the start, but at some point it seems like something’s going to happen with him that causes just about everyone to feel sympathetic toward him lol. I have no clue at all what this thing is going to be though

this Bakugou angst is going to lead to some good BakuDeku shit. I don’t know what shit, but I can’t wait for it. I have a feeling it’s still a looooong ways out, though

(ETA: well we did have an arc where Bakugou got kidnapped, so for a while I was sure this was what all the angst was about. but now that’s done and things have quieted down again, and we still haven’t gotten that BakuDeku goodness, so I’m thinking there must be still more angst on the horizon! which, frankly, good. yes. moooooore bring me more)

there is some guy with wings I think. not sure what his deal is

I keep seeing Shinsou in a mask similar to Deku’s

lastly, I blame the anime for this because they’ve thrown in some filler related to it that no one asked for, but: I’m pretty sure I’ve seen All Might’s master. but I kept throwing my hands up in front of my face or looking away or closing my eyes whenever I realized what was going on lol. but he was writing a letter to someone in episode 13, and I figure it has to be this person. and I saw like a brief silhouette of someone with long dark hair. and I think I’ve seen fanart of this person before. I can’t quite remember the details of it but I feel like this person is probably the aforementioned Gran Torino? the good thing is it seems like I don’t have much longer to wait before I finally find out more about that one.

(ETA: so obviously the person in question with the long hair was Shimura rather than Gran. so I was spoiled but also not spoiled I guess, because even though I’d gleaned Gran’s name from somewhere, I never actually saw him until he made his appearance in the manga.)

anyways, that’s it as far as I can recall!

so Deku’s made it to school now but he’s really tired. probably from all the nearly dying two days ago

someone’s running up behind him in a raincoat, and this bulky frame with its awkward arm motions could really only be one person

yep

never does anything halfway, this guy

Deku says they’ve still got five minutes before the first bell rings, but Iida insists that “the students of U.A. make it a point to arrive ten minutes early!!” wow I really would not have done well in this school

Iida immediately tells Deku he doesn’t need to worry about his brother and he’s sorry if they caused him any concern

the way he says it and the way Deku stares at him and dots afterward makes me think there is indeed cause for concern though. plus, like. you were on the volume cover, Iida

looks like all the kids had strangers coming up to them and congratulating them on their efforts

WOW look how well Aizawa has them trained

EVEN BAKUGOU WOW. Sero and Kouda switched desks, Ochako sprinted twenty feet all the way her seat at the back of the room, and Kaminari fucking teleported into his seat out of nowhere damn

so let’s see if this man has that eye scar now, then!

yes!!!

holy shit, and this is going to be there for the rest of the series. I fucking love attention to detail like this

what is hero informatics class. that sounds like something Deku would excel in. Deku should probably teach the damn class

Kirishima says it’s stuff about “hero law and junk.” oh my god I instantly have so many questions

GASP!!!!!!

GOOD LUCK BEATING MY NICKNAMES FOR ALL OF YOU LOSERS. OH MY GOD I’M SO EXCITED LOL

also, they really let these kids pick out their aliases at age 15? granted, most of them have probably been thinking about this for nearly their entire lives, so it’s not just a spur of the moment thing. but still, that seems awfully risky. I hope they’re allowed to change them later if they wake up one morning cringing over the choice

ohh! but first, pro draft picks!

he says it’s based on who the pros think will be ready to join the workforce after another 2-3 years of experience... so after graduation, basically. or really whenever they turn 18. well that makes sense

he says it’s not a guarantee of anything though; the offers can still be revoked if things don’t pan out

jesus christ

the top four stole the show, but the top two are in their own fucking league

worth nothing that Bakugou managed these numbers even with his personality out there on full display as well

I think a large part of that has to do with the guy that raked in 4,123 draft picks. the fact that Todoroki is that powerful and Bakugou still managed to beat him in the finals. of course, that wasn’t him at full power though, which I expect Bakugou is still salty about and will be for quite some time

only 108 people recognized Momo’s utter flawlessness. that’s everyone else’s loss

and even fewer gave Ochako a chance, but at least she still got 20!

and of course the most notable thing about the entire board is the fact that Deku’s not up there at all, which is fully understandable since his power’s drawback was thrust into the spotlight. I can’t imagine any pro hero agency wants to deal with that. 

well, it’s just like he was thinking back in the last chapter -- he’ll just have to find another way to manage things

poor Aoyama is in a huff about not having gotten any picks either

Momo congratulates Shouto, but he says it’s mostly just his dad’s influence. I really hope he can break away from that eventually. basically his entire life has centered around his dad up till this point, first with him being trained as his successor, and then later when he became obsessed with defying him. I just want him to be able to go after his dreams for his own sake and have pride in himself on his own merits without worrying about his parentage and how that comes into it

Mineta is shaking Deku and telling him, “I told you you scared them,” and no one fucking cares about your opinion on anything Mineta. this isn’t news to anyone

anyhow, Aizawa says that whether they were picked or not, they’ll all get a chance to work with the pros as part of their education

oh thank god, he says the names are only tentative. “but you’ll still want to pick something appropriate.”

now someone else is cutting in and screaming “OR ELSE YOU’LL KNOW TRUE HELL”

oh my god please let this be some poor sap who got saddled with the worst superhero name ever

nope it’s just Midnight

but she says the name might end up being what the world ends up calling them, so they still need to pick carefully

oh, true... if something eventful happened and the media ended up reporting on it, what was previously a “tentative” name might end up becoming a permanent one just like that

then again, IRL celebs change their names all the time and no one usually bats an eye

also Marvel superheroes change their names a fucking lot too. “it’s Iron Patriot now.”

looks like Midnight is here to make sure they don’t fuck it up. Aizawa says he’s no good at that lol. you picked the best fucking name out of anyone, fucking Eraser Head

my gooood I’m so curious and so excited to see what they pick. I haven’t been spoiled for any of this at all, and I’ve barely done any speculating, because I tend to just pick the first thing that pops into my head and stick with it, myself

they only got 15 minutes to do this, but like I said, I can’t imagine a single one of them hasn’t already thought this out. at worst, a few of them might have a little trouble narrowing down like a top 2 or 3

oh my god Aoyama

it’s perfect

omg Midnight is so supportive and nonjudgmental. all she does is tell him it’ll be “easier” if he takes out the “I” and changes “cannot” to “can’t”

but are you really telling me that this twinkly little lad is about to make his debut as “cantstoptwinkling.” because that literally is a tumblr handle

Mina wants to be known as “Alien Queen”

also this finally all but confirms that her quirk is indeed acid. you all have no idea how long that speculation was eating at me

(ETA: pretty sure you do by this point since this is like the 10th time I’ve mentioned it haha)

Tsuyu’s up next! the best nickname I had for her was “frog girl.” she’s chosen to go as Froppy instead which is the cutest fucking thing I’ve ever heard in my life

OH MY GOD MY BOY KIRISHIMA WENT AND PICKED “RED RIOT”, FUCK YEAH WHAT A NAME. APPARENTLY IT’S DERIVATIVE AND HE BASICALLY STOLE IT FROM ANOTHER GUY NAMED CRIMSON RIOT, WHICH IS SOMEHOW EVEN RADDER. BUT THEY’RE CALLING IT AN “HOMAGE” SO HOPEFULLY THEY’LL AVOID ANY LEGAL TROUBLE

speaking of people who want to pay homage, Deku has a whole fucking list of All Might tribute names

it’s a toss-up between “All Might Jr.” and “Mighty Boy”, clearly

I’m personally hoping for some kind of Alexander Dumas-related thing, going with the One for All theme, but I doubt we’ll go that route

(ETA: cuz we were saving it for the bad guy, clearly!)

Kirishima really hasn’t thought of a name yet??? dude, lightning is literally the easiest element to make a badass name from. see: Wikipedia’s list of fictional characters with electric or magnetic abilities. just fucking name yourself Zeus or some shit

Jirou tapped him on the shoulder and said “how about Jamming-Yayyy” and I'm pretty sure she was just fucking with him but he actually seems really into it omg

her face I can’t

(ETA: Jirou’s inability to keep from cracking up when Kami overuses his quirk is possibly my favorite running gag in the series)

so now we’ve got Jirou, Shouji, and Sero as Earphone Jack, Tentacole, and Cellophane. all good names, though Jirou really went full literal, there. just went for broke on being as straightforward as possible

though nothing beats “Tailman” for literal

Satou’s sign says “Sweets” hero and his name is Sugarman?? first of all, I LOVE IT, and second, DUDE WHAT THE FUCK. this guy’s really been out here the whole time with some kind of donuts power or something and he somehow passed the entrance exam with it and we still have yet to see it??

AND HOMESTUCK’S CHANGED HER NAME TO PINKY NOW LMAO

Kaminari ended up going with Chargebolt, and for some reason he wrote this longass math equation explaining it, just in case it somehow wasn’t clear

HAGAKURE LITERALLY PICKED THE NAME I’VE BEEN CALLING HER THIS ENTIRE TIME GOD BLESS YOU GIRL

THAT’S ONE OUT OF TWENTY. I’LL TAKE IT

Momo went with “Creati.” I... guess...

OH MY GOD SHOUTO JUST WENT OUT AND HIT A HOME FUCKING RUN

OH MY FUCKING GOD LMAO

BUT ALSO, IT’S ACTUALLY A REALLY PERSONAL DECISION FOR HIM, BECAUSE IT’S HIS FIRST NAME AND NOT HIS LAST, AND THUS REFLECTS HIS DETERMINATION TO CAST OFF ANYTHING RELATED TO HIS FATHER

BUT STILL IT’S LITERALLY JUST HIS FIRST NAME OH MY GOD I LAUGHED SO FUCKING HARD. THERE WERE TEARS

I KNOW WHO TSUKUYOMI IS THANKS TO ITACHI. THANK YOU ITACHI. COOL PICK, TOKOYAMI

FUCK YOU MINETA

MY SOFT ROCK BOY KOUDA IS GOING WITH “ANIMA” AND HE IS DESCRIBING HIMSELF AS A “PETTING HERO” AND I THINK I LOVE HIM

so by my count, that just leaves Iida, Ochako, and my sons

this boy really went and tried to put “murder” in his fucking superhero name

URAVITY

OMG

OCHAKO REALLY WENT AND PUT A FUCKING PUN IN HER NAME

?? Midnight’s saying that the only thing left is Bakugou’s revision? um Deku and Iida are sitting right there??

oh

I should learn to scroll down before I start to fly off the handle like that huh

oh FUCK ME

FUCK. FUCK

okay, so I’ve had a weakness for this very specific type of angst ever since KHR nearly did this to Yamamoto during the Inheritance Arc. in the end he was healed and he made it out okay though. but now, ten years later, Iida’s brother has been sacrificed to the gods of shounen manga angst, and they have finally been appeased. holy shit

so this is going to be a tribute to his brother then I take it

oh!!! his brother asked him to take his name and Iida had started to write it down but then erased it at the last second and put his own first name down, thinking that he wasn’t ready yet :’(

so now it’s just my lads

here goes nothing Deku!

oh my god

based on everyone’s reaction and that remark... lol this fucking guy

lol Kacchan’s face

WHY ARE WE CUTTING AWAY BEFORE I GET TO SEE WHAT BAKUGOU PICKED

oh! someone picked Deku in the draft after all!

All Might’s asking who it is -- OH MY GOD. THAT CHAPTER TITLE FROM BEFORE. DON’T FUCKING TELL ME

based on All Might’s response... yep

and then one last little jokey panel of Bakugou’s revised name “Loud Explosion Murder” lmao. they could be here a while

(ETA: THEY NEVER ACTUALLY REVEALED HIS NAME THOUGH OH MY GOD?? or did they and I somehow missed it? IT’S BEEN 60 FUCKING CHAPTERS. dude what the hell)

BONUS:

oh my god Present Mic is the one who came up with Aizawa’s name. this is probably Mic’s greatest contribution to human society.

young present Mic is adorable and young Aizawa looks like Gaara with messier hair

and today in “Horikoshi explains away plot holes that no one was ever going to care about in the first place”, we have Mina apologizing for mixing up the directors of Alien and Aliens

fucking incredible

[anandam-tutorials-posts-blog]

Let’s Diagnose the Faults of Our Education System

 After achieving independence, some educationists of India realized the faults of our education system imposed by the Britishers. Many commissions like Radhakrishnan Commission, Mudaliar Commission, Kothari Commission etc, were set up to discuss the very system pros and cons. After the close analysis of the system, some defects were brought to limelight which were to removed necessarily. There is no denying the fact that some reforms did take place in it; still, it is undergoing some other major defects as is clear fathoming some other major defects as is clear fathoming the problems of the students her.

 Students carry on their studies hoping they must get jobs later on; their will never go in vain. But what happens? … they remain unemployed despit having even first class degrees. In so much so that they fail to maintain even their own expenses sufficiently. They, thus, get frustrated a lot.

 Behind their frustration, which is responsible? Obviously, it is the faulty education we get. Let us diagnose its faults from close quarters:

 A well known samskrit shlok reads:

“Saa vidyaa yaa vimuktaye”

 The knowledge got from education is that which redeems us, but from what? It redeems us from social and religious dogmas and superstitions; it redeems us from all sins; it redeems us from the pitch darkness of all types of ignorance.

 In English, the word ‘education’ is derived from the Latin word ‘educere’ meaning ‘to lead out’; but out of which?....obviously of ignorance. At the same time, in the dictionary, there is another Latin word ‘educare’ meaning ‘to bring up’. It gives a broad meaning of education. Education is that which brings up our body, mind and soul at once. These three maintain a balanced life. If any education being imparted to students lacks any of these, then it can never be called a perfect education. Such education was already av ialble in ur Veda periods. The universities viz., Vikramshila, Takshashila, Kuch, Nalanda also had world recognition in imparting such perfect education. Students from China, Japan, Arab and from many others used to get benefited from such versatile education.

 Our existing education system pays some attention to the development of body and mind but it ignores the development of soul altogether. The development of soul takes place through regular practices of spirituality. It is fully practical rather than theoretical. An English proverb puts an emphasis on the importance of soul which reads:

 “For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world and lose his soul.”

 It is our souls which make us liberal in view. It is our souls which forewarn us against doing wrong. It is our souls which keep us against doing wrong. It is our souls which keep us on the ideal and moral path.

 Here, the word ‘soul’ does not pertain to the spiritual, non-physical part of human body; it rather pertains to morality and emotional sensitivity. These days, students lack soul. Their sole aim is to make money by hook or by crook when they get fobs, nay, they study only for this purpose. This is the reason why corruption, bribery etc, are rampant in the society. Had there been a special emphasis on the edifice of morals in an appropriate environment created by our education system, there would have been less or no corruption, bribery and other mal-tendencies possessed by educated communities.

 In early periods, there was a close relationship between the students and the teachers. The teachers were worshipped by the students; even kings bowed down before them. The teachers, too, in return, left no stone unturned in imparting best education to the students. The students did succeed in standing on their two feet in the society after the completion of their studies.

 Now-a-days, what we notice is that there is a wide gap between teachers and students. The students have no due respect for their teachers and the teachers too, are careless towards framing students’ future; to build the characters of students is a worthless job for them. Our education system is unable to cement the very gap between students and teachers.

 Existing education system is much theoretical rather than practical. There should have been proper blend of the two in stead. What students read in their books has hardly, any connection with their practical lives; this bookish knowledge of theirs fails to yield livelihood. It shows that our education can not stand in good stead in the life; it is not job-oriented.

 For educated unemployed students, business is left as a last resort. Their positions become just like those earners who have never tasted education, but they are earning substantially through their experience in particular fields. Therefore, why do people waste their time and energy in acquiring such education? They should rather give priority to some technical knowledge through which they at least, can maintain themselves and their families.

 Education is that which makes students good citizens and crafts usefulness into them. The existing education system makes effort to make them good citizens to some extent but it fails to craft usefulness in them. In both regards, general education will have to be made compulsory up-to the higher secondary level so that students may keep their families on the prosperous, peaceful, healthy and education track, plus, they may understand the country well. In general education, students will learn

   How to analyze the problems of the country with their solutions through debates and queries

  How to study the government

  How to maintain their health and the health of their families and the society.

  How to combat any crisis in the family and society

  How to eliminate malpractices in the society

  How to eliminate malpractices in the society

  How to discourage anything which is absurd and irrational in the society

 This general education can frame students’ thoughts all-round; it can never go in vain. Each and every student will feel proud of the education they will be getting.

 John Hershall mentions knowledge and learning, he got from true education in these words:

           “The knowledge and learning have always been the source of inspirations and solace even during the times of adversity in the varied events of my life.”

 It is therefore such education should be imparted which may always stand in good stead even at the time of adversity.

 The essence of good education is to broaden the outlook of students by bringing about necessary changes. There is a close relationship between natural surroundings and man. Mother Nature broadens our outlook; she provides us with such interesting and inspiring knowledge which we do not get merely by going through various books. Her teachings, some times prove to be striking.  She sometimes, stirs our underlying ability. The great scientist Isaac Newton was stirred by a falling apple from a tree. This natural phenomenon provoked him to know the secret. And he then, propounded the theory of ‘Gravitation Law’.

 There are many secrets hidden in the nature which are still to be found out. We can feel nature only to keep ourselves close to her. Rabindranath Tagore felt it and it was because of that, he could pen a world reputed book ‘Gitanjali’, which later on won him the Nobel Prize in 1913.

 Rabindranath Tagore was an educationist of the first water. He wanted students to carry on their studies in the lap of Mother Nature. For the very purpose, he established ‘Shantineketan’ in 1901 which has won world applause. Students from various parts of the world are enjoying the unique education there.

 Rabindranath Tagore wanted to create a free and open environment for children. Such environment, really, creates an urge to view the whole world in a distinct angle. It creates liberty of mind; it does not create any bondage of boring education. Students embrace textual chapters pleasantly.

 Education is closely related to colours, sound and movements of body. These are special languages through which we can express our views entirely of our won. We mostly use words to express our thoughts but we use specials languages to express our various sentiments. And a man without sentiment is not man at all. In the words of Rabindranath Tagore:

 ‘We may become powerful by knowledge, but we attain fullness by sympathy.

 To raise sentiments, Rabindranath Tagore gave special stress on the special languages which can be expressed through drawing and paintings, singing and dancing and acting on the stage.

 Having known to these facts, our education system seems to be worthless. We are aping western education cornering our high and rich traditional education. This is nothing but our unpatriotic propensity. Willium Burke remarked in this connection in these words:

 Education is the chief defense of nature.

 What type of education do we have which can not defend our rich culture and tradition?

India is a country of villages and the students there have got to attend to their domestic activities and the activities of education. They are, thus, unable to devote themselves sufficiently to their studies and the reason of which very few of them can qualify in overcrowded job-oriented competitions. Many of them evade going to schools and colleges thinking of their bleak chances of getting government job. They engage themselves in earning their livelihood either by living at their villages or by going to town or cities.

 Sometimes, it so happens that students get plucked in the most important secondary school examination upon which their future rests. With their failures in it their chances of getting government jobs become bleak. They even can not take loan from the government fund for starting business without the matriculation certificate. After getting plucked in the examination in question, many village-students fail to muster up their courage to sit for the examination again. On behalf of such students, I strongly advocate the ‘no-exam policy which has recently been declared by the existing Government.

Students whether they belong to villages or towns or cities, carry on their studies to get jobs finally. For this purpose, they must sit for competitive examination, provided, they have required certificates for those. In the absence of such certificates, they are disqualified.

I want to convey my point of view through it by raising a question, if the studies of students end in jobs, why these certificates are a must. Since childhood, students ascertain their definite goals; but the barriers of examinations deviate their minds. These barriers, sometimes, dish their hopes also.

If students carry on their studies focusing on their respective goals since childhood, they will become efficient for their cherished goals till required age. Hence, I flatter myself that no-exam policy would stand in good stead for the students.

 Students need such education system in which they may get well acquainted with various types of employments. There should be a special class for that during school period which may help students select their definite goals as per their ability. Because of the lack the knowledge of various employments among students, there is a great rush for selected employments.

 Sixty two years have passed since English colonialism was rooted out from the country; but our universities are still steeped in colonial mindset. It has affected badly on our rich culture and tradition. The university has clearly failed to inculcate due patriotic spirit into the students. Methods of technique and learning, courses of study and the conduction of examinations have not prepared indigenously.

The Kothari Commission held in 1966, took initiative in this regard. It wanted at least 10% of those total colleges i.e., the colleges can initiate educational innovation, design curricula, evolve new methods of teaching and learning, prescribed courses of study, conduct the examinations in their own ways keeping the maximum benefit of the students in the mind. But it is a matter of sorrow that this policy of sanctioning autonomy to colleges has been a failure. However, there are still 140 autonomous colleges India but they are in bad condition. His is due to cold attention paid by the people and the government as well. However, these autonomous colleges have shown sterling performance in building up students’ characters and careers.

We should have autonomous colleges where we may feel at ease in getting education entirely of our own.

For shaping vast educated India, we will have to throw ourselves into dynamic activities not through party –politics but through pure, moral, concrete and determined steps.

 Let us own liberal views with regard to selves, society, country, world and finally the whole universe without confining ourselves only to books; let us give a hand to something creative.

 Anandam

Giridih, Jharkhand

[robbiejohnsonyr3ax3021]

AX2002 - University - Dimensions - Animation Production Phase 2

Before starting to animate my segment for our group project being the “Dimensions” project, I planned on how to approach animating my work by splitting everything into four phases, I would do each phase on every shot/ file before moving onto the next phase of development. In this post I will be explaining what I have done for the second phase of development being the animation phase.

After redrawing the Witch and completing phase one, I began blocking out the key positions and poses for my Witch character, I focused on the Witch for most of this phase as she had the most movement variety when compared to both the Wisp and Hand characters. When blocking out the key positions and drawing the Witch’s poses, I was also doing research into character movement for the show to try and make my animation line up more with the show. This involved my watching episodes and looking at character turnarounds, for example 180-degree character turn arounds in “Phineas & Ferb” are usually very quick and are both hard to spot but also very smooth in their transition, this is because the characters face forward (towards the camera) and then have three quarter turn and another position in between before ending on the complete turn. For one shot where the Witch turns around and walks to the portal behind her, this was originally going to have the witch walk diagonally, but when looking for key poses, images and clips of the character Vanessa walking diagonally, it looked as if her body was in more of a side view position than a angled position, so in the end I kept the shot as if she was walking side ways towards the portal and put the portal at a slight angle.

The Wisp and hand character were mostly animated using key frames, but there are also some occasions where the two needed more than key framed movements. The first shot of the scene where the Wisp and Witch fall through the portal had a combination of key frames and drawn animation for the Wisp falling towards the ground and catching itself before it hits the ground by swinging upwards into a loop. The second scene where we have a mid-shot of the Witch, we see the wisps full body, this was created in a mixture of twos and single frame animation, with each drawing dragged into place as if the Wisp was moving around the screen. I also decided to make the top of the wisp’s movement flame hand drawn and not use any other tools for it such as the line or contour tool, I did test three versions of the Wisp being drawn and using tools such as the line and contour tool, but when comparing all three versions side by side, the hand drawn look felt most natural and less robotic (also the fact that the top of a flame never really remains still and has little fragments come off from them made hand drawing the top of the candle a better fit for this approach). Lastly this scene also allowed me to have more control over the squash and stretch used for the wisp spinning around and zooming off screen, as I felt trying to key frame the movements and animate on top of this would have been difficult to juggle at the same time, so doing everything frame by frame or in two’s felt like the easier option in this scenario.

Most of the remaining scenes with the Wisp and Witch where key framed animated movements, such as the Wisp floating in place in it’s still/ ball form and the hand’s eye moving. But the final two scenes with these two characters had some more than just key frame animations with them and I felt like I learned something new. When the Wisp approaches the portal, it turns and morphs into a hand and waves back at the hand at the stall. This scene not only juggled key frames and multiple hand drawn images, but I learned about motion and stop motion key frames and more specifically that their timings could be triggered between the two options. In my previous poem project, I had learned about motion and stop motion key frames and how they function, but I thought that once one of these motions was set, it would remain the same throughout the scene. However, it turns out that on one timeline, you can have both motion and stop motion key frames active, so I had the Wisp’s movement towards the portal be motion key framed and then when the wisp turns around and waves at the hand, I would highlight this area of the timeline, right click, and set to stop motion keyframes. This was quite difficult for me to wrap my head around at first as sometimes the wisp would appear broken in its movements almost looking like static, but after figuring out which areas I had affected with each of the motion types the easier it became easier (writing down on a piece of paper the motion timings helped fix this issue a lot). I then applied this method of animating to the hand character as it’s main movement in the wave are key framed, but I had also tried to include some slight tilt movements in the fingertips one the hand would slow down after either going all the way left and right.

Overall, the animation phase of development had its fair share of ups and downs from learning new animation techniques such as mixing drawn frame by frame animation with key frames, to trying to understand how my characters would move and how to try and relate their movements (such as turn arounds) back to their source. I should note that I have not received the voice over from the other members of the group, so I have decided to hold off animating the lip sync until I receive the voice over work. I have also held back from animating the portal as I feel that I need a little more clarity as to what we are doing as a group with the portal. For now, I need to focus on the stage of development being phase 3 colouring in my characters.