#Basil? really be out hear telling you the truth when you need it the most
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its-teeem · 1 year ago
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Basil? is Great at Conversations
Decided to try my hand at writing because Basil? haunts my every waking hour.
This is set after chapter 19 where Dorian practically confesses to murdering Basil but Henry thinks it’s a joke. Keep in mind this is in the tpodg mindscape au.
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“Poor Harry,” It cooed. “If only he knew that everything he hates is packaged neatly inside of you.” 
Dorian tried not to face it, hearing it pace around behind him loudly. Instead, he continues to look at the new assortment of jewels he’s been gifted from some noble from some other dinner party he couldn’t be bothered to remember. It’s barely enough to distract himself from its voice.
“I have no doubt of the spectacle he would make, flinging himself away from you like one does from a dead animal.” It stopped walking, deciding to stand at Dorian’s left. “Harry always had an adoration for the dramatic.” 
It leaned in to peer at the opened glass case where the jewels were placed, carefully reaching out a gloved hand to pick one up to view it closer. 
“It matches Harry’s eyes.” It said, sounding rather fond. “Wouldn’t you agree?”
Against his better judgment, Dorian turned tentatively to look at it, only to see its empty eyes looking at the jewel held tenderly between its thumb and finger. It was smiling, but that too looked hollow. No matter how much it sounded like Basil, it never quite managed to replicate his impressions. 
“It’s humorous how accurately Harry was able to describe you in the piano room,” It was laughing now, rotating the jewel to inspect its cut. “You truly are nothing but a vulgar, low born, beast.”
“And you’re dead.” Dorian told it, sounding more like an attempt of an affirmation than a truth. “Why won’t you go anywhere else instead of irritating me with your presence. All you do is insult me, following me like some lovesick maiden without any of the beauty and appeal!” 
It tilted its head, grinning wider as it took note of the tremble in Dorian’s hands. Dorian hated its smile, how it would look at him like an unruly child. He hated how it squinted its eyes at him, clearly amused by the spectacle Dorian surely was to it.
“You make it sound like I’m to blame for my circumstance,” It answered softly, placing the jewel back in the case. “You’re the one who killed me dear boy, you’re the one who robbed me of a proper grave as well.” 
“It wasn’t my fault! All of this is because of you and your wretched painting!” Dorian defended himself, slamming the glass case shut in an attempt to catch its fingers under the lid. Unfortunately it expected his reaction and managed to move them just at the right time “You’re the one who wanted to bother me when I didn’t desire to speak to you. You’re the one who insisted on coming into my home and proceeded to follow me into the attic!” 
“So I’m to blame for trusting you?” It replied, delighted by Dorian’s reasoning as it tapped its finger on the glass. “It’s astonishing the lengths you go to rid yourself of any responsibility! You really can’t handle the consequences for your own actions. It's rather childish dear.” 
Dorian looked into its eyes as it leaned in closer, putting itself at eye level with him. In a sudden fit of loathing, he lifted his hands and grabbed it’s neck, tightening his grip. It didn’t move nor react, it really didn’t care as Dorian put more of his strength in strangulating it. It merely continued to look at him, empty eyes showing him his own reflection. Dorian hated how his reflection looked in its eyes. 
“I hate you.” He told it, finally letting go of its neck. He didn’t even leave a single bruise. “I’ve always hated you.”
“That’s quite alright Dorian, anything you say is of no worth to me.”
END
Yes, I drew fanart of my own made up scenario. Enjoy!!! ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و
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hero-deserves-to-be-happy · 11 months ago
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5, 8 and 23 for the ask game? your takes are always awesome, i'm curious heheh :)
Aww thank you so much for the ask! It means a lot to us to hear that you think our takes are awesome. We really appreciate all of your support and would be delighted to answer these questions for you! 🥰 Short answers are below, but our extended answers to questions 5 & 8 are below the cut due to length & to hide OMORI spoilers... 😅
Questions are from this character ask game! Thank you so much for playing 😊 Warnings: OMORI Spoilers & heavier themes as seen in the game
5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?
Sleeping At Last - "Two" (Official Lyric Video) (youtube.com)
Two by Sleeping At Last is the definitive Hero song in our opinion and absolutely the first song that comes to mind when we think of him.
We have included some deeper song analysis below the cut, but for now here are some our favorite lines that remind us of Hero:
"Sweetheart, you look a little tired When did you last eat? Come in and make yourself right at home Stay as long as you need Tell me, is something wrong? If something's wrong, you can count on me
You know I'll take my heart clean apart if it helps yours beat
It's okay if you can't find the words Let me take your coat And this weight off of your shoulders"
8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?
Please keep in mind that this is just an expression of our personal opinions and our attempt at respectful, constructive disagreement.
Despise is a strong word that we wouldn’t use, but we strongly disagree with the notion that Hero would not forgive Sunny and Basil. We respect the right of everyone to have their own headcanons and interpretations of Hero as a character and how he would react to learning the truth, but Hero lashing out, refusing to forgive Basil and Sunny, and permanently cutting them out of his life does not correlate to our personal interpretations of his character at all.
We view Hero at the time he is learning the truth as a mature, conflict-avoidant, and deeply empathetic person whose one (1) fight with Kel after a year of overwhelming emotional suffering, grief, and despair has left him especially sensitive to expressing negative emotions and dedicated to never repeating the mistake of lashing out at someone he loves, one of the greatest regrets of his life, again. Despite having every right to all of the complex emotions he would feel and perhaps even wishing to unleash that internal turmoil, we believe Hero's empathy for Sunny and Basil and their pain, grief, and guilt (especially given the fact that he has gone through something similar blaming himself for Mari's death all of these years) and his love and care for them as his friends & honorary "little brothers" would ultimately be stronger than any complicated feelings he may have towards them. We want to believe that with time, there would be true healing and forgiveness.
More on this under the cut...
23. Favorite picture of this character?
Sprinkles' favorite is the Hero Tags Kel picture from the Real World. It's so heartwarming and wonderful to see Hero so happy and the brothers so playful and having fun with each other!💙🧡 Acacia's favorite is Basil's photo of Hero and Mari at the beach. Hero just looks so incredibly and genuinely happy (though to be honest he looks so happy in most of Basil's real world photos), and there's something so sweet in the fact that it's this candid and organic moment of pure, unadulterated joy. You can just feel how happy he is whenever you look at this picture. Also, who doesn't love some HeroMari? They're so adorable! 💙💜
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Bonus: My favorite Hero face in the entire game is definitely this one. It's just the perfect mix of kind & thoughtful and humble, maybe even a little shy too. That slight blush in his cheeks is also super endearing. It's just the perfect visual representation of how I imagine him. —Mod Acacia
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Additional Discussion Below...
5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them? (Continued)
Despite having found many songs that remind us of Hero in some way, neither one of us could think of a song that fits him better or more perfectly than Two by Sleeping at Last (Please see links above the cut). [A/N: I (Acacia) actually did a post about this song & how it relates to Hero on my main a while back before this blog existed, so Sprinkles and I were trying really hard to think of another song but ultimately decided there just isn't any song better suited to him so I'm borrowing from that post and answering this question on behalf of both of us.]
From the very first line, "Sweetheart, you look a little tired--when did you last eat?", this song just screams Hero. Beyond just his penchant for cooking for his loved ones, Hero really wants nothing more than to take care of people. He has such a genuine generosity and selflessness that he truly "will love you without a single string attached" and would not hesitate to put someone else and their needs in front of his own--bending over backwards to help them or make them happy, even if it is at his own expense or to his own detriment ("you know I’ll take my heart clean apart, if it helps yours beat" and "you can take the oxygen straight out of my own chest.").
While he would be the first to offer help, support, even the shirt off his back to someone who needed it, he struggles with asking for help himself, can't stand being the center of attention, and does not like talking about himself or his own problems because he deeply fears being a burden to others ("no, I don’t want to talk about myself—tell me where it hurts."). After he begins to heal from that period of deep depression he experienced immediately following the loss of Mari, Hero consistently buries his own pain, grief, and sadness--deeply afraid of hurting or burdening his family, friends, or any of his loved ones like that again (even though, of course, the ones who love him want to be there to support him, no matter what he's going through).
He knows he's wounded and hurting, but he pushes it aside in favor of helping others. When Sunny finds him at Mari's piano in the middle of the night, for instance, Hero is "fine"—immediately jumping into trying to support and comfort Sunny, but if you go back into the room immediately afterwards, Hero is crying by himself, just unwilling and unable to express his own pain and sadness to someone else. It's absolutely that "I just want to build you up, build you up ’til you’re good as new, and maybe one day I will get around to fixing myself too" sentiment.
Finally, the line "I just want to love you, to love you, to love you well. I just want to learn how, somehow, to be loved myself" in the bridge just gives me chills when I think about in the context of Hero. He is such a big-hearted, empathetic, and sincerely loving person, but he deeply struggles to accept the love and support from others that he gives away so generously.
8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise? (Continued)
Please keep in mind that this is just an expression of our personal opinions and our attempt at respectful, constructive disagreement.
It is hard to even imagine how incredibly difficult it would be for Hero to learn and to process the truth. He likely feels overwhelmed, hurt, upset, heartbroken, possibly even angry, and so many other stormy, complicated emotions. He is absolutely entitled to feel all of that and more, and maybe even in a certain way he wishes he could unleash all of his internal turmoil. Ultimately, however, we strongly believe that Hero at that point in his life is the type of person who would stop himself from taking all of that out on Sunny and Basil and would not staunchly withhold his forgiveness, and/or harbor this bitterness towards them.
We understand where this idea of Hero reacting badly to the truth comes from given the fight that he had with Kel several years before, but in our minds, Hero, at the time he is learning the truth, is no longer the scared, young 15/16 year old kid old who finally snapped at his brother one (1) time after months, possibly almost a year of unbearable guilt, overwhelming grief, and deep depression. We are not and will never defend Hero's fight with Kel but recognizing that it was unfortunate, hurtful, and damaging to their relationship does not mean that it is necessarily indicative of Hero as a person (especially given all of the surrounding context of the fight) and does not necessarily dictate how he would react to a similar situation (i.e. learning the truth) in the future. If anything, we strongly feel that the fact that Hero did lash out at Kel that one (1) time would be a strong motivation for him not to do anything like that again. Hero knows that he really did hurt Kel, and he probably lies awake at night for years afterwards feeling unbelievably guilty about it and worrying that his relationship with his brother is permanently and irreparably strained. We think that because of this he becomes a much more mature person who, if anything, is perhaps almost overly cautious about expressing negative emotions because he never wants to hurt someone he loves in that way again. In our minds, that desperation to not repeat what is likely one of the greatest regrets of his life would actually keep him from lashing out at Sunny and Basil, and he would instead curl inward on himself to process his complicated feelings alone.
Even if it takes him a little time to process everything, we feel that Hero would ultimately be one of the most empathetic characters to Sunny and Basil's feelings surrounding Mari’s death—particularly the guilt they feel. Hero has blamed himself for what happened to Mari all this time--mentally beating himself up for not even knowing she was depressed and driving himself in painful circles wondering if he had just reached out to her, had made sure she understood she could aways open up to him, had been more of a support to her, had better expressed how much he cared about her, had held onto her tighter, had loved her better--had loved her more would things have been different? He has carried that weight around for 4 years--blaming himself for her death, and now he sees Sunny and Basil doing the same thing--granted it's under wildly different circumstances (and there’s more culpability despite it being an accident), but the feelings & pain of that overwhelming guilt are very similar.
Hero knows what a heavy burden that is, and he is such an empathetic person that he would recognize a lot of himself and his own grief, pain and guilt in Sunny & Basil. We believe that revelation is really one of big factors in how he finally reaches a place of healing and forgiveness with them. We like to think that he has this moment where it just clicks in his head that even if he has these complex feelings about Sunny & Basil right now, they are suffering in a similar way to how Hero himself suffered for years. He knows how painful that is and would never wish that kind of suffering on anyone let alone two people he loves as if they were his own little brothers. In our minds, it's almost as if the complicated feelings he might have about Sunny & Basil due to the truth get overshadowed by Hero’s empathy for their suffering and the fact that he cares so deeply about them and that’s what finally gives him some clarity and the strength to forgive.
Finally, we feel that in reconciling himself to the situation and making peace with what happened, Hero would ultimately blame Mari’s “bad knee”/knee injury for her death more than Sunny, choosing to believe that Sunny didn’t push her that hard so it was really the fact that her bad knee gave out that made her fall down the stairs, whereas an uninjured person wouldn’t have fallen. We know from the canon that he is in college planning to eventually become a doctor at the time he is processing all of this, so he definitely has a basic understanding of human anatomy and physiology, and we think that when the haze of emotions clears that is the explanation he would reason himself to.
To Hero, at least eventually, Mari’s death is a tragic accident and any anger he might feel is ultimately directed more at her bad knee and at the fact her injury never healed correctly than at Sunny for shoving her. Whether that's because that is actually the truth of what happened or just what Hero needs to believe, we're can’t be 100% certain, but it is our personal opinion that placing most of the blame on Mari's knee injury allows Hero to reconcile himself to the truth and thereby more easily forgive Sunny and Basil.
Please feel free to check out some of our Hero Reacts to the Truth Headcanons and more discussion on this topic in this post as well.
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jonathankatwhatever · 5 months ago
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It’s been a long couple of days. Currently sitting next to the little pond at Rachel’s house. I dragged an Adirondack chair over. Peaceful but windy, and my coats are all buried in the back of the U-haul. It drove reasonably well loaded. Unloaded was terrifying: it jumped and shook, and the entire inside banged like a big steel drum. Could barely fit it into the driveway, and it was only a 10 footer. Backing in required going up on the opposite sidewalk to the fence. Google kept telling me to go to the Merritt, which I couldn’t take because I would hit the bridges. No option for commercial vehicles or height restrictions. I’d think the latter would be very useful given the number of trucks that get stuck under bridges. Renters and small companies don’t subscribe to special services that give them correct information.
We generate linear algebra. I’m thinking, in particular, of the way it represents a linear relation as a point, and that it uses ideal space, meaning straight lines only, connecting through the i-hat and j-hat concept.
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That was from yesterday. It is now 25 Jun 2024. I’ve actually been productive. Currently working through an aspect of truth, which is that truth determined internally is not the same as truth determined externally, and yes that’s obvious but modeling it is not. The working example, as it always has been, is the truth of what I hear, what I’m told, and thus the outcome of the process by which doubt appears and disappears, with the disappearance bringing jumps, sometimes awe-inspiring leaps of understanding. Like Baryshnikov but actually floating.
So that process popped up as alternation of perspective and connected to non-abelian and skew-symmetric because the results are literally opposite, and that became how opposites model -1 to 0 and 0 to 1, which is back to the decades old conception of 1-0-1 as including that statement, because that statement identifies the origin from which we count.
I’m very sleepy. It’s going to be in the 90’s. I was up at 5 and rearranged all the stuff we unloaded yesterday into clothes, house, bathroom, office/school, and wtf do we do with this. I also cleared out an area for storing stuff longer term. I could use more than 5, maybe 6 hours of sleep.
I was thinking about how my left side and right side feel very disconnected right now. My left leg hurts when I lie down. Sciatica . It’s been almost impossible to get my finders into the affected area. It’s difficult to reach, on the outer back of the leg, but mostly it was so solid it could not be manipulated. I’m able to get into the area more now, so of course it hurts more now.
Doesn’t hurt when I lie on my stomach but without functioning sinuses that is tough. At least I can’t smell the poop and the wet cat food. I’m in a small room with the windows closed.
I’m not happy with where that bit above was going. It suddenly became confusing and I drifted to sleep.
The idea is that if some condition, then false, no matter how true it reads while the thread is running. Like a relationship, either mathematically or physically. It lasts as long as the thread. Truth can be fleeting as the most momentary fantasy, which invokes the Metaphoric Bundle concept, which now we can see Attaches as the tangent space, which has lots of names depending on which branch you approach it from. Like it’s the point of a vector (Victor) or an algebraic structure. It’s also the tip of anything, like the tip of a spear with its potential and whatever Actuality has is or will occur.
That doesn’t need commas and dashes are too much.
I saw a reddit thread which said SIO rips off this other song, and I thought to myself: cultural literacy is momentary and true only to the extent of the Boundary, which really is a great concept because it doesn’t mean a strict fence. It can be more like Pete: when he goes away from the Manor, his body starts to disappear.
Who today has ever heard of Toni Basil? Maybe they’ve heard The Ronettes. Everything has an antecedent. There are limited stories, limited themes, limited expressions which exist in any context. We have the math which explains why.
So if I can try to wrap that idea up for a moment, it’s back to the mathematics as proof of relation, which is what maths are about. If it’s not true, and we assume a relation, which we can because we keep drawing one, then the math proves that relation in exactly the way described. If false, then it’s non-abelian and at least at some level is anti-symmetrical or skew symmetrical. Both true and false can generate ‘true’ up to the limit of the falsity. That’s more like what I was getting at because this fits to the conception of gsPrimes, especially as they speak to existence, like the unique existence of an individual and its temporary existence here.
This also speaks to the vast arrays of things I see all the time, fragments, glimpses and sometimes long playing images which only exist in that D4-3 sense within [D3-4].
Again playing with the Eternal.
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dishtothedeath · 1 year ago
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Class Action Settlement
There was a lot presented to them that they needed to address and to say. The room was vibrating with energy but as a message comes through from her tablet, she knows there’s not that much time left and they deserved the truth or as much as they could give.
So though she asked, Araceli knows better than to expect Tsuki to immediately comply so she can take the lead. Let’s start with an easy one.
“The staging of this finale is Severin’s handiwork… I’m not entirely sure how everything works but I do know that there were no plans to execute us. I… can’t tell you why it might be that he just ran out of time.”
She shouldn’t regret that that was the case. If anything she should be thrilled to live but it’s weighing on her. They wanted their justice, whatever form it took, but would have to wait.
“In any case, while what you’ve experienced here is real… the world at large does not think that is true. It was framed as a show and HDQ Entertainment bought out the broadcasters, networks, and internet providers along the way… There are people who have tried to voice concern but they are far and few between. Though I suspect that the proper authorities have already been alerted so… It’ll be easier for you to share your experiences if you so wish to.”
She had considered if her manager or dad were part of those people who cared enough to speak. It feels just as sick saying it as she remembers hearing it for the first time. Worse, actually. Back when she had convinced Basile to follow her lead even at the detriment of Tsuki.
Araceli stops her talking and keeps her eyes on him, nodding to signal that he should start. 
“Everything is a broad ask you know… besides I already said it early on… there was no good reason. The person in the pod, my brother, was just a bonus once I realized I could potentially use him for all of this too. 
The short of it is I was at a company party and happened to have a chance to speak with the boss about my future career… one bad faith joke after another lead to me saying that with how desensitized people are to the media these days we could likely get away with actually killing people on a show. I get along with some of his tech support staff who were sharing details of a new VR project going on since the environments fucked, so I added that we could use the people we kill to further the project. Honestly I thought it was corporate banter at first, but he liked the idea… This is where I’d love to say I’m a better person and I called him a freak, but once I saw he was genuinely invested… I mean honestly I was curious about it all.
So why? It was a sick joke between two corporate bigwigs that became real because neither saw an issue with it. We toyed with you like all reality celebrities are toyed with. And to be honest for most of you… you’re getting bodies back and will have full control, so there’s really only emotional damage.”
It was quick, clinical, and painless, at least on the Producer’s end. A clear lack of guilt in his words, in his tone, in his expression, save for a small glance towards Araceli before he closes his eyes and continues.
“I put Haruki into a coma when I tried to get him out of the picture… oh over a decade ago? Since then my mother made me replace his existence, as she could live without her second son existing, but her dear precious first born needed to live. Add some resentment, some wanting him dead, and now I have a chance to put him, or a version of him back so she’ll finally leave me alone. Like I said… he was just a bonus. If anything, the fact that research can at least potentially help other coma victims… is an even further bonus?
Despite the lack of chip in his brain initially, the combination of it, and some time has lead to his AI self being a one to one with how he was, and I never added any blanks in for him… it was just the system itself. The new issue is figuring out how to get my idiotic brother’s consciousness back to his physical body, but clearly I don’t have time for that anymore, so I’ll probably just shove him in a robot too, he’d probably prefer starting at 18 again instead of his atrophied body.”
As long as his brother was back so his mom could leave him alone, it was clear at this point that was all he cared about. Shallow, just like everything he claims.
“So, most people think this show was actually a performance by all of us, once you’re all in new bodies it will be like this never happened, and you can have as many chances at further life as you want until you’re done. Even us who never died, that chip can still be used down the road if wanted. Optional of course.”
Tapping the side of his head, the Producer continues.
“Orrrr you can stay in the servers. Love the whole virus idea, but you’d be just that. A global virus and I really don’t care to have several governments after me just because you want to hack Tesla’s. Soooo… those are the choices. Oh and to keep things from being all how do we know you didn’t add mass self destruction, I’ll work on Sunny first with him overseeing me. Then once Sunny’s back we’ll work on everyone else…
Until I get bored, then it’ll just be Sunny. He’s a fast learner he’ll probably figure things out, and if he really needs advice he can contact me. If anyone who is currently alive and wants a backup body since you also want a second life, you’ll have to let me know now. Otherwiseeee I can’t really do much, oopsie.
Feel free to pitch other ideas that don’t involve me dying though. Maybe I’ll consider them. Any cool special features you want your bodies to have like built-in roller blades.”
Thumbs up.
Araceli… doesn’t know how to possibly follow all of that up. There were bits and pieces she didn’t know and information being put into a different light. Whatever picture she had of Tsuki warped into a different form. She didn’t have enough fight left in her to scream or even get angry. It just hurt. 
“Right. You may not need it depending on what HDQ is going to have to spare, but Sweethearts can and will provide you with money, legal services, or.. connections but I doubt many of you would want to be involved in the entertainment industry.” She hadn’t gotten approval from this but Araceli knew the names and faces of all those who attended the meetings. This was only part of what she was owed. “Public Relations will also be handled on our side. Even if you want to disappear from the public eye, that can be arranged.”
She looks down at her tablet, carefully sending a message and looking to make sure that none of the dead glitched out more than they already have been. She receives a message in turn. There’s relief on her face.
“The rescue will be here soon, with medical staff for those who need it… Wherever you want to go, they’ll take you. You should pack your belongings, if you still want them. They’ll take you when you’re ready to leave.”
The Producer takes a moment as his tablet beeps at him and nods to confirm Araceli’s words.
“Meanwhile I have work to do. Please give your last requests of what you want so I know where to focus my efforts. If you don’t make one, I’ll choose for you. Perhaps I’ll see you all again, though, probably not since none of you really want that, if you really want to… I don’t know. Add that onto the requests because I’m assuming no otherwise?? You guys really are all so mean, making Sunny have to do extra work.”
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ericspinkhair · 4 years ago
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quarantine longings
pairing: best friend!kevin x fem!reader
word count: 3.2k
synopsis: you and your best friend have sex because quarantine made you horny
warnings: best friends to lovers, takes place during the pandemic, spoiler of 356 days (but not the end, just generally the plot), no use of condoms but only the pill, creampie, sexual fantasies, fingering, hand-job, sex, slight angst at the end if you squint
a/n: I would literally die for kevin, I love him so much. I'll be writing a multiple parts series about him after I'm done writing scenarios for every member first.
requests are open!
masterlist + requests
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you slammed your foot hard against the wall and cursed in pain. you hopped on one foot to your bed, holding your other leg in agony and tasted blood as you bit your lip to keep the volume of your suffering groans in check. someone knocked on the door.
'are you okay?' your roommate asked concerned.
'no, leave me alone, kevin,' you croaked out. you wanted to suffer by yourself.
there was an awkward silence and then you heard him sigh. soon after, the door next to your room closed shut.
why were you so frustrated, one might ask? well, the pandemic was kicking your butt and you just couldn't take it anymore. when the news of the virus had first spread, no one thought it would become this serious. but suddenly everyone was walking around with masks and spent most of their time staying at home.
after graduating high school, you and kevin had decided to move in together for college because both of you were broke and couldn't afford to live alone. you had been best friends since middle school and had been convinced that it was a smart idea at the time.
and everything went smoothly for the first one and a half years. however, after not seeing anyone else since the start of the pandemic over a year ago, it became increasingly difficult to share an apartment, but not in the way one might assume. you were neither sick of each other nor did you fight a lot. to tell the truth, it was quite the opposite.
earlier, before you had kicked the wall in anger, the two of you had painted together. kevin was majoring in art and, since you didn't have anything better to do, you joined him while he did projects for his classes. you might have been majoring in journalism but you had always liked drawing and painting, even though you weren't particularly skilled. you were a naturally clumsy person, always tripping over air and dropping things. today you were hecticly moving around your hands while telling him about a stupid video you had seen and you accidently let go of the brush in your hand. it hit the side of kevin's face, leaving a wide splodge of red paint on his right cheek.
to get back at you, he jerked his paint brush and splattered some green color on your white shirt. you saw this as a challenge and soon both of you were both drenched in the colors of the rainbow, laughing hysterically on the floor, not caring that you were spreading the paint on the poor carpet.
you turned your heads to look at each other and you felt absolutely in peace. you loved this man and couldn't be more glad that it was him and not anyone else you were stuck with inside of this apartment.
he stood up to take off his stained shirt and your smile quickly faded off your face. your lips slightly parted and you couldn't help but stare at his now exposed biceps and abs.
your mouth watered and you felt heat pooling between your legs as you took your time to study his architecture. thoughts about how badly you wanted him to thrust into you while his strong arms held you up invaded your mind. you tried to shake them off but it was impossible.
occasions like this were slowly becoming a common occurrence for you.
having mostly stayed inside for over a year, also meant that you didn't have sex for that long. it's not like you were the horniest person on the planet but you still had needs that were being neglected. with kevin being home all the time you didn't even dare to masturbate, scared that he would be able to hear you through the frustratingly thin walls. you must have gone insane with all the lust building up inside you and that's why you suddenly craved to have sex with your best friend. this whole thing was destroying everything. it was hard to act normal when he was making you this nervous and heated but you tried to pretend that everything was fine anyway for the sake of your friendship.
that was the reason why you were angry and had hurt yourself. you hated the way you felt about your best friend and you hated the pandemic for not giving you an outlet to escape so you could recollect yourself.
what you weren't aware of was that kevin was no stranger to the exact same frustration.
he would need more than his ten fingers and ten toes to be able to count the amount of times he had to run to the bathroom to hide his boner because he had done so much as look at you bend over or stretch. he didn't want to make you uncomfortable but it was a challenge to try and calm down his hormones.
whenever he jacked off, images of you flashed through his mind; your sweet curves and pink lips drove him insane.
last week, you two were cooking together and you had asked him to get the salt. he stood behind you to reach for it on the highest shelf. he was forced to press his crotch against your butt cheeks and his dick hardened against his will. he quickly handed you the salt, excused himself and ran off before you could figure out what had happened.
he might not have known the cause of your sudden outburst but he sympathized with your fury because he had a lot of pent up anger towards covid as well.
he lay in his bed and tried to focus on the book he was reading but he couldn't tune out the groans coming from the room next to his. he cursed.
'stop it!' he was panicking as he saw a familiar tent forming in his pants. your sounds triggered some weird perverted part of his brain that sent signals right to his genitals. his dick was hardening and he saw no other solution to his problem than to give in to his subconscious desires.
he pulled down his pants just far enough so that his cock had enough room to spring out. it only needed a few strokes before it stood tall and angry. kevin pressed his head into his pillow and moved his hand fast. he wanted to get over with it quickly. he emptied his cum on his stomach while imagining your greedy little mouth being stuffed by his cock. he lay there panting as yet another round of shame flushed over him.
'get yourself together,' he whispered, mentally slapping himself.
***
'do you want to order japanese or italian?' you asked kevin. today was friday which meant it was time for your weekly tradition of ordering take out and watching a movie.
'definitely italian. we've already had japanese for the past four days. I need something else for a change,' kevin complained and shuddered at the thought of having to eat sushi again. the japanese restaurant prepared absolutely delicious food but he just couldn't stand it anymore.
you laughed at his pained facial expression. 'fine, italian it is.'
within twenty minutes the doorbell rang and after about half a minute kevin came back with two huge boxes.
he opened them on the small table situated in front of your couch and the smell of freshly cooked pasta seasoned with basil made your stomach growl.
kevin wanted to dig in already but you stopped him. you had to choose a movie first.
'let's watch tall girl. I saw everyone hate on it on tiktok,' you suggested.
'I think we should watch 365 days, that was all over my for you page as well,' kevin argued. you hadn't heard of it so you weren't sure whether it would be the right movie for you. the rule was that it had to be as bad as possible.
'according to what I have heard, it's apparently even worse than 50 shades of grey,' kevin added which piqued your interest. the both of you had watched 50 shades about two months ago and you were honestly shocked by how awful it actually was. you couldn't understand why everyone had been so obsessed with it when it was first released. if 356 days was really worse, then you'd hit the jackpot. you clapped your hands.
'fine, you win. I swear if the movie isn't as horrible as you say it is then you owe me something!' he intertwined his pinky with yours to promise.
watching horrible movies was way better than watching good ones. making fun of bad storylines, stupid characters or horrible editing was one of your favorite past times.
'I guess I'll have to add are you lost, baby girl to the top 10 worst lines ever spoken. who thought ah yes this is sexy, let's have him repeat it over and over again', you complained, shoving some pasta into your mouth.
'so he's like I won't do anything without your permission while he is literally groping her boobs against her will, like make it make sense, massimo', added kevin, ruffling his hair in frustration. he almost completely forgot about the food.
'so let me get this straight: he drugged her, kidnapped her, tied her up, hung up a painting of her just because he saw her face when his dad was shot?'
'totally relatable.' both of you giggled.
you were enjoying complaining about the plot. it was horrible.
there were plenty of erotic scenes but they were honestly so funny and kinda gross that you could bare it without really being affected by them. kevin, on the other hand, had placed a pillow over his hard-on to hide the embarrassing fact that these terrible, smutty scenes had turned him on.
and then the infamous boat scene came.
massimo and laura had a huge fight, she fell of the boat, he saved her and now she was suddenly so in love with him that she begs him to fuck her. which he does.
you felt your panties become increasingly wet as the couple had steaming hot sex.
'this is embarrassing but I'm so horny,' you admitted but in a way that should have suggested that you meant it as a joke. something about this statement stirred something in kevin.
'well, what can I say?' he replied and lifted the pillow. your pupils widened at the sight of your best friend's bulge.
his eyes darkened and he looked at you with lust clearly written on his face. you reciprocated his stare with the same intensity. you tried to focus on his dark brown orbs instead of his boner but the image you had just seen was present in your mind.
his gaze shifted to your lips and, before you knew it, kevin climbed above you and pressed your back flat onto the couch.
your lips locked and you immediately buried your hands in his hair to pull him closer. you moved in sync, his lips fitting perfectly onto yours. you bucked your hips up against his crotch and earned a moan from kevin. he opened his eyes in shock as realization hit him. he quickly pulled away and jumped off the coach.
'I'm so sorry, y/n. I shouldn't have just done that. I don't know what came over me,' he apologized profusely, staring at his feet. did he really think that you didn't want this?
'give me your hand,' you told him and held out your hand.
'why?' he raised his eyebrows in confusion. you rolled your eyes.
'just do it.'
you took his hand and led it to your crotch.
'what are you- oh my god.' your juices had completely soaked through your panties and your sweatpants. 'you are so wet.'
'for you,' you added. 'there's no need to apologize. I'm literally begging you to continue.'
you didn't have to say that twice before he pulled you closer to him by your hips and engaged you in another desperate kiss. his hands were groping your butt while you let yours slide under his hoodie. you felt his naked skin and toned abs, as you rubbed his stomach. you lowered your hands and bravely palmed his boner through his clothes.
'y/n,' he hissed out against your lips. you hooked your thumbs in the elastic of his pants and underwear, and pushed the material down to his thighs. he struggled to get them off.
you stroked his hard dick as he slipped his hand into your panties to massage your pussy at the same time.
he slipped one finger inside and began working it in and out. you finally were getting the relief you had been desperately craving for for so long. kevin was skilled and your walls were trying to swallow his slim finger. you were quickly coming close to your orgasm after having abstained for more than a year. you pulled his hand out.
'I bet you can make me come even better with your dick,' you challenged kevin.
'you bet I will.' he was confident.
'let me just look for a condom.' he was already turning away to go search in his room but you held him back by the arm.
'forget about it. I'm on the pill and I want you raw. I want you to come inside me and not spill into a stupid condom.'
the idea of this sounded very tempting to kevin. he picked you up and threw you back onto the couch, drawing your hips closer to him so he could pull off all the pieces of clothing that were hindering him from accessing your pussy.
he propped up his arms next to your sides and spread your thighs apart. strings of arousal were hanging from your folds and he saw your hole desperately clench around nothing. his dick hurt from how much he wanted to finally be inside of you. he wanted to find out how close he had been able to imagine how you would feel around him.
your hole took him in easily, welcoming him happily by embracing it tightly. kevin swore he could've cum right here and there.
he went slow at first to give you a chance to adjust but you were already fully ready, rocking your hips forward to meet his thrusts.
he crashed your mouths together and you kissed him like he was oxygen and you were short of air. you smiled and your eyes rolled back, satisfied with how things had played out today and the prospects of coming looked fairly promising.
desperate for release, kevin picked up the pace, his eyes closed while fucking into you like a horny animal. he couldn't help himself and all the 'faster's and 'harder's spilling from your mouth only encouraged him to drive himself deeper into you.
you wrapped your legs around his torso in an attempt to regain the control you were losing.
'fuck fuck fuck,' you cursed, feeling your muscles starting to contract. kevin brushed away some hair that was stuck to your sweaty forehead.
'it's fine, I'm coming too,' he announced and it took only a few more thrusts before a body shaking orgasm flushed over you, making you see only white. this drove kevin over the edge too and he spilled inside you, filling you up with his hot cum. he continued to slowly ease his dick in and out of you, fucking his semen right back into you until you had ridden out both of your orgasms. he let himself fall onto the couch right next to you, panting hard.
'I very much needed this,' you sighed in content.
'same, I wasn't sure whether I could hold out any longer without having a proper orgasm.' he watched his cum drip out of you.
'we should've thought of this sooner,' you said. 'this was a great idea.'
kevin hummed in agreement.
***
so now you and kevin were having sex on a regular basis, your high score being five times in a day. it felt good to finally live out your sexuality and not having to restrict yourself. sure, you guys did it more than necessary but it was a great way to pass time and it felt fucking amazing.
today you had done it in the shower after waking up, then on the kitchen counter and you had just finished having sex in his bed.
he was spooning you from behind, his cock still placed inside of you. he nuzzled his nose into your neck.
'stop, that tickles,' you chuckled.
'sorry.'
after a while of comfortable silence you heard him let out a big sigh.
'what's wrong?' you asked as he pulled out of you. you turned around to be able to look at him.
'I don't think I can do it like this anymore,' he confessed.
'what do you mean?' you asked. 'are you talking about us having sex?'
he nodded. your heart dropped and you started feeling dizzy. you tried to search for answers in his eyes but he avoided looking at you.
'w-why?' you stuttered, trying to hold back the tears that were welling up in your eyes.
'it was amazing at first,' he started and finally raised his head to meet your gaze, 'and I went into it without much thought. I went crazy during quarantine and began fantasizing about having sex with you. then it became reality but now I understand that was probably wrong of me. I've always thought of myself as a gentleman, yet I slept with you without much thought. you see, my issue is this…'
suspense hung in the air and you were impatiently waiting for him to get to the point.
'I like you.'
you quietly gasped in surprise. you had been expecting him to say you were bad at sex and that he regretted everything but not this.
'I shouldn't be sleeping with you unless you were my girlfriend,' he finished off his ramble. you felt immensely relieved.
'do you want me to?' you asked him.
'want you to what?' kevin was confused. he had been a hundred percent sure you'd immediately jump out of the bed in disgust when he confessed.
'be your girlfriend. after all, I like you too, you moron.' you realized that you had known this for a while. you might have even been crushing on your best friend since way before the pandemic struck but it was kind of hard to track your feelings. still, you were sure you liked him too. now that he had admitted his feelings, you were able to admit yours not only to him but to yourself as well.
'wow, I didn't expect this,' kevin confessed surprised. you laughed.
'yeah, we should've realized this sooner.' he pulled you closer and kissed you. it was different than the other times. his lips moved softly against yours, in contrast to all of your rough and passionate kisses you had exchanged these past few weeks. he conveyed his emotions through the kiss.
'you're ready again?' you groaned as you felt kevin's dick harden against your upper thigh. he chuckled.
'sorry, you just turn me on so much.'
so then you did it for the fourth time. that day, you set a new record of having sex six times. you might have been happy now but still just as horny.
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sunnysviolin · 4 years ago
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So far you seem to have a really good grasp on everyone’s character so I just wanted to hear your thoughts on this: when people talk about hero’s reaction to the truth it never feels quite right, like it feels lacking, said thing that’s missing is the fact it was sunny that did it, Mari’s beloved little brother that hero knows loved Mari so much too, I never see people bring up that point which is sad because I think it would create a interesting conflict within hero because on one hand sunny killed Mari on the other hand it was an accident and after cooling down a little he realizes that Mari would probably want him to not hurt sunny over it plus even though sunny killed her he’s also the last piece of her left (on a different note my hc is that hero sees sunny as a brother in law even though he never got the chance to marry Mari) so does what I’m trying to make sense? I’m willing to clarify on some things if needed
No I totally get you nonnie!! For this I would direct you to my fic Promises (Here’s a direct link) It’s the very first thing I ever wrote for Omori, and it’s probably the thing I’m most proud of from this fandom to date. My perspective on this is really personal, and based a lot on a very intimate situation. I’m gonna put this in my normal style, but this is more meta and less headcanony So
Why I Think Hero Forgives Sunny (And Honestly Kind of Quickly) 
I personally really don’t like any iteration of “Hero hits/punches/hurts” Sunny. It makes me feel really uncomfortable because I find it to be intensely out of character, and misses one of the main points of Hero’s character
Think about the situation that we first meet Hero (Real World Hero) in. Basil is drowning. Sunny is drowning. Aubrey pushed Basil and she’s the reason that they’re both dying. Kel is screaming at her. 
What does Hero do? He saves both of the boys, makes sure they’re breathing and alive, and he tells Sunny that they need to get Basil somewhere safe and dry. He does not condemn Aubrey or take the time to even say an unkind word to her. In fact he continues to be really worried for her until they get to her house
I see Aubrey and Basil at the lake as a direct parallel to Sunny and Mari. I also see Kel and Hero’s argument as a softer (but still there) parallel. I think it was really purposeful of Omocat to give both Hero and Aubrey (the two characters who would be most likely to react in a harshly negative way to the Truth) a situation in which they were Sunny. 
Hero and Aubrey were the ones in the wrong in those situations. Aubrey pushed Basil for no reason other than she was angry. Hero was grieving and he snapped at his little brother who was in the same exact situation. Both of them immediately regretted it. Both of them got the chance to apologize and take it back. Sunny didn’t get that. 
So I really cover this better in Promises tbh....Go read it I swear it’s not too long but it hits exactly how I think Hero would react and why
Ultimately I don’t see Hero not forgiving Sunny, and I don’t see him like distancing from Sunny. Not after the last three days, and the Basil/Sunny fight, and everything he realized over the journey of the game. I don’t think it would be easy, there would defintiely be times he needs to walk away or scream into his pillows and weep and grieve, but losing Sunny? 
No Hero would never be able to lose anyone again. Not like he lost Mari. 
As for Hero seeing Sunny as a little brother...yeah absolutely. I think that’s another reason why Kel continued to reach out to Sunny for all those years. Kel also sees Sunny as a brother
I’ve covered this a little bit, and I’m working on an AU right now (not published yet) that really deep dives into this idea, but like I see the four of them have something incredibly deep. 
Hero and Mari knew their lives would be spent together. Kel and Sunny grew up tied together because of their siblings and the love they shared.
So I grew up with a best friend like Kel and Sunny. She practically lived at my house, I saw her every single day (like literally every single day) she slept over at my house more often than she did her own, and one day she just stopped talking to me. Out of no where. Complete cut off. 
We reconnected when we were 17/18 just like Sunny and Kel and we immediately fell back into lock step. There was no resentment that I thought I might have. It was just ‘oh there you are I’ve been missing you’ and we’ve been joined at the hip again ever since. 
Hero and Kel and Sunny are forever intertwined now, a deeper connection because they lost their girl. There was never a point where Sunny wasn’t “the baby” (This is also why Kel has such strong middle child energy before even becoming a middle child)
They were a group of six, but there was something different between the four of them. Aubrey and Basil were dear desperately loved friends, but Hero and Kel were Mari and Sunny’s family. 
That kind of love makes you have strength you don’t think you have- the strength to continue to reach out to a closed door day after day and the strength to forgive someone for the ultimate accident. 
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eliselovely · 3 years ago
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Canine Matchmaker
Words: 2819
Warnings: p in v sex, oral (f receiving), they don’t really know each other in this, stranger danger irl but this is fiction
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New Years Eve night was usually a night spent with friends, getting drunk and eating way too much snack food while waiting for midnight. Not for you though, you were happy to make yourself dinner, pour yourself a glass of wine and cuddle up on the couch with your dog to watch movies. The first two steps of that plan had gone well, and you had just let Basil, your pitbull shelter dog outside. You wait a few minutes before checking on her, she usually finishes her business pretty quickly in the winter time, not wanting to stay out in the cold for too long. However, tonight she was taking longer than usual. Going over to your patio door, you look around your backyard but you don’t see her.
“Basil, come here girl!” you call for her, stepping outside. You take a moment to listen for the jingling of her collar but you don’t hear anything. “Basil come!” Again nothing.
There was a snowstorm that was just beginning, and you were starting to fear that she had gotten out of the yard. If that was the truth, then you’d be in for a stressful night. The temperature outside was hovering around freezing, which meant that the roads would be coated with slick ice and the holiday meant that it was unlikely that the city would send out many plows. If you were going to drive in search of Basil, it had to be soon. Triple checking the yard, just in case, you find the fence gate slightly ajar, the last piece of evidence you needed to be sure you were making the right decision to get in your car.
“Fuck,” you grumble, going back inside to get your purse and keys. Donning a pair of snow boots and a heavy coat you head out to your car.
As almost an afterthought, you text a few of your neighbors to see if they’d keep an eye out for her. Driving slowly, you start to circle the neighborhood, going block by block making sure to be careful around corners, the roads getting more and more slippery by the minute. Visibility was also rapidly decreasing as the heavy snow continued to fall. You had just started to panic when you got a call from an unknown number.
“Hello?” you answer, trying to keep your voice from shaking in panic.
“Hi,” comes a male voice, “I think I found your dog, this number was on her collar.”
“Yes! Oh my god, is she ok?” you ask.
“Yeah, yeah, she was shivering pretty badly, but I gave her some water and she’s settled on my couch under a blanket.” the man said.
“Oh thank god,” you breathe out. “Can you text me your address so I can come pick her up?”
“Definitely,” he confirms. “Drive safe, it’s getting pretty bad out there.”
“Thank you,” you say and hang up.
As soon as the man’s text comes through with his address, you punch it into google maps and you’re on your way. You pull up to your destination a few minutes later, a quiet stretch of townhomes just a few miles from your home. You sent him a quick ‘I’m here’ text and hurried up to the front door. The man who answers your knock had to be the most attractive man you had seen in real life, and in other circumstances, you would have flirted.
“Hi,” he greets. “Please, come in. Basil is in the living room, she’s pretty worn out.”
Kicking the snow off your boots, you step inside. As if she could sense your presence, Basil comes trotting into the entryway causing you to drop to your knees, giving your previously lost companion as much affection as you could. 
“Hi baby,” you say to her, turning your head away from her attempts to lick your face. “Hi, yes thank you, I missed you too. You worried me naughty girl.”
You hear the man chuckle lightly at your one sided conversation, you had almost forgotten he was there. 
“Thank you so much for taking care of her,” you say, standing up again to face him.
“Absolutely no problem. I’m Frankie by the way, Frankie Morales,” he says, offering a hand for you to shake.
You shake his hand and introduce yourself in return. The two of you make small talk for a short while, and when you do leave, you find the snow storm has picked up considerably, roughly an inch and a half of fresh, wet snow.
“Shit,” you breathe. “Driving is going to suck.”
“If you want,” Frankie starts, “if you want, you can wait it out here and see if it lets up a bit, the plows will be out soon and make driving a whole lot easier.”
“If you don’t mind, that would be great,” you say. “But I am going to send my location to some friends just in case you’re a psycho or something.”
Frankie chuckles again. “I’d expect nothing less. You want a drink or something?
The two of you end up in his living room, chatting easily and flirting over a few beers, Basil comfortably dozing between you. Your thoughts start to wander to what you would do if you had met Frankie at a bar, how you probably would have chatted him up, or maybe he would have beaten you to it. You don’t realize you’ve zoned out until you hear his voice, calling you back to the present.
“Hey, you still with me?” he asks.
“Yeah, sorry,” you say. “Just got lost in thought is all.”
“What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?”
“Not to answer a question with a question, but can I say something sort of forward?”
“Shoot.”
“You can totally stop me if I’m overstepping, feel free to kick me out if yo-.”
“Hermosa, what is it?”
You take a second to pluck up the rest of your courage, flushing at the nickname he called you.
“If we had met at a bar, I would have invited you home with me,” you confess, flicking your eyes up to meet his heavy gaze.
“Oh yeah?” he encourages, obviously knowing exactly what he was doing. “What would we have done?”
“I would have had you fuck me until I couldn’t walk,” you say bluntly, leaving the pleasantries until you had your response. Frankie didn’t respond at first, just took a sip of his beer never breaking eye contact.
“And what about here?” he finally says. “What if I were to invite you upstairs so I could do just that?”
“Well then, I think I’d tell you to show me a damn good time,” you say.
Frankie slowly leans forward to set his beer on the coffee table, taking yours from your grasp and doing the same. He stood in front of you, offering his hand to help you up. His touch is gentle as he places a large hand on the side of your cheek, taking a small step closer as he presses his lips to yours. You had barely a moment to bask in the feel before the two of you were being startled apart by Basil letting out a particularly loud snort in her sleep.
“I think that’s her way of telling us to get a room,” you joke, giggling lightly.
“If you say so,” he says, and before you have a chance to comprehend what he said, you are being swept off your feet into his arms, one strong arm around your back and the other under your knees. He gives you another quick kiss before starting up the stairs, presumably towards his bedroom.
He gently sets you down on the soft down comforter, giving you the first real kiss of the night. One you can truly take your time to enjoy, it’s slow and passionate, but with an undercurrent of obvious lust. You feel his tongue swipe at your bottom lip, politely asking for permission to do more. You gladly open for him, loving the taste of his mouth. 
“Frankie,” you moan into his mouth, your brain no longer being able to form full thoughts.
“You want more Hermosa?” he asks, hands sliding down to caress and squeeze your breast making you arch into his touch. “Yeah?”
“Please,” you whine, embarrassed at how desperate you sound.
“Alright Sweetheart, I’ll give you more,” he promises, pulling you upright again to pull your sweatshirt over your head and tossing it somewhere to be found later. “My god you’re gorgeous,” he says running his hands across your bare skin, reaching around you to unclasp your bra. He lays you back down again, attaching his warm mouth to one of your nipples, his fingers pinching the other one.
“Fuck yes,” you breathe out. 
You feel his grin against your skin, delighting in giving you pleasure. Pulling his mouth off with a pop, he moves further down, unbuttoning your pants and pulling them off along with your panties.
“Damn, I think you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen,” he says.
“I know a better use for that motor mouth of yours,” you tease in a moment of clarity. You hold his gaze as you slide your legs open further, exposing your dripping core to him.
“So fucking sexy,” he all but moans.
Leaning down again, he kisses your lips, and from there leaving a trail of wet, open mouthed kisses down your chest and abdomen. Placing a kiss to each thigh, sending you a wink before licking a thick stripe through your folds up to your clit, sucking the sensitive bundle of nerves between his lips, his short facial hair scraping against your inner thighs.
“Ah, yes Frankie,” you moan.
Without warning, he sinks his index finger into your pussy causing your hips to buck up into his mouth in response. You card your fingers through his hair and hold him tightly to your sensitive heat, your moans growing louder as he continued. Frankie adds another finger, hooking them upwards and stroking your g spot.
“Right there!” you exclaim. “Fuck, right there.”
Frankie chuckles against your cunt, the vibrations just adding to the pleasure he was giving you. The familiar coil in your core was growing ever tighter, threatening to snap at any moment.
“I’m close,” you warn in between breaths.
“Cum for me Hermosa,” Frankie groans against your clit, sucking even harder and pumping his fingers even faster.
The coil in your belly snaps and you cum on his fingers, letting out a loud, lewd moan as you do. He pulls fingers out of you, licking one more long stripe through your folds.
“You taste so good Hermosa,” he praises, kissing up your body reaching your mouth yet again. You love tasting your release on his lips. 
“Frankie,” you say, desperate to feel him inside of you. “Frankie, fuck me please.”
“As you wish Hermosa,” he grants. “You want to ride me?”
“Yes!” you exclaim. “Oh my fuck yes!”
Frankie chuckles again and stands to undress himself. His golden skin glowed in the lamp light, the small dusting of hair on his chest looked soft to the touch and you couldn’t wait to run your hands across his skin. You let your eyes wander downwards as he strips his pants away, a dark, well groomed happy trail leading to his substantial cock. You feel your pussy clench at the thought of having it inside you.
“You like what you see Hermosa?” he says with a sly smile.
“Dear god yes,” you say almost in a whine.
He grabs a condom from the bedside table and rolls it on before settling on the bed. Once he is ready you sling one leg over his abdomen, straddling him. It is your turn to lean down to kiss him, the remnants of your cum still detectable on his tongue. You pull away and reach behind you to line his cock up with your entrance, slowly sinking down onto it. The two of you groan in tandem at the feel of it, the stretch of his cock inside of you dancing on the line between pain and pleasure. 
“You’re so tight Hermosa,” he praises, “so warm.”
You moan at his words, grinding your hips down against him. Bracing your hands on his chest, you start to bounce at a steady pace, Frankie’s hands on your hips helping to guide you as you take your pleasure. His resolve is straining as he resists the urge to fuck up into you, not wanting this to be over too quickly. He slides a hand up to cup one of your tits, the other moving to rub your clit, hoping to coax another orgasm out of you.
“Come on baby,” he groans. “Cum on my cock.”
You clench around him as you cum again, your nails digging into his skin leaving crescent shaped marks. His fingers rubbing lazy circles on your clit as you come down from your high, your fluttering walls providing the perfect sheath for Frankie’s rock hard member. Collapsing against his chest, you press your lips against his, happy to explore his mouth with your tongue. After a few moments, he bucks his hips up into you a few times before flipping you onto your back, careful not to let his cock slip free.
“You ready for more Hermosa?” he asks.
You nod, not trusting your mouth to work well enough to form words after two intense orgasms. He starts slow, savoring the feeling of your velvety walls wrapped around him. He steadily builds up his pace until he’s fucking you with reckless abandon, one hand squeezes your tit, the other arm braced above your head, his weight resting on his forearm as his hand stroked your hair. You felt yet another orgasm building as he slammed his hips into yours, he was grunting in pleasure with every thrust.
“Frankie, I’m gonna cum again,” you gasp.
“Do it,” he orders. “I’m close too.”
His cock hits that perfect spot inside you once, twice, three times and you’re sent hurtling over the edge, clenching down hard on his cock. As his hips start to falter, you’re hit by a wonderful thought.
“Frankie,” you moan.
“Yes Hermosa?” he replies, breathless and panting.
“I want you to cum on my tits,” you confess.
He answers you not with words, but rather with a loud groan and a quick searing kiss. He pulls out of you and tears the condom of his weeping length, stroking it rapidly as he positions himself over you. Reaching up, you place your hand over his, helping to bring him to climax.
“Fuck,” he grunts, his hot cum shooting out to land on your tits and chest. You look up with a large smile on your face, your thumb rubbing slow circles on the back of his hand, both of you still trying to catch your breath.
“That was amazing,” you pant.
“Mmm, to say the least,” he says, his voice almost at a whisper. “I’ll be right back to clean you up Hermosa.”
You hum in response, contentedly laying on his large bed. He comes back with a warm washcloth, gently dragging it over your skin cleaning away his release from your chest and yours from between your thighs. Before returning to the bathroom to return the washcloth, he places a tender kiss to your forehead.
“Gorgeous,” he states.
A chill washes over you and you are suddenly hyper aware of Frankie’s missing body heat. Rolling off the bed, you spot your discarded sweatshirt near the edge of the bed. Just the few steps it takes you to reach the piece of clothing shows you just how sore you are, and how much more you would be later. The thought makes you smile as you pull your sweatshirt over your head.
Frankie reenters the bedroom soon after, still gloriously naked. 
“Hi,” you mumbled into the kiss he gave you. 
“Hi,” he responds. “The snow is still coming down pretty heavily, and it doesn’t look like the plows have been out. So it looks like you and Basil are going to be stuck here tonight.”
“Worse things have happened,” you joke. “Do you have a pair of sweatpants I could borrow for the night?”
“I’m sure I can find something for you.”
He goes to his closet then, pulling on a pair of boxers and a shirt before digging out a pair of sweatpants before tossing them to you. As you pull on your discarded panties and his much too large sweatpants, you hear the jingle of Basil’s collar as she comes up the stairs. 
“She’s quite the matchmaker,” Frankie laughs.
“To say the least,” you giggle, squatting down next to your canine companion. 
“Hey,” Frankie says, pointing at the clock on his bedside table. 
“Happy New Year,” the two of you say simultaneously, laughing at the absurdity of tonight’s situation.
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pineappleciders · 2 years ago
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Appearance: I’m 5’4 with pale skin, I weigh about average weight for my size. Hair is dirty blond and goes to about my shoulders. My eyes are a silver-blue and I have freckles on my face.(sadly, a few pimples here and there too) I have five birth marks on my thighs, I also have some scarring on my skin from picking at scabs.
Personality: I’m social until my battery’s out, then I usually spend a while to myself. I have a pretty flexible personality and am willing to be calm or chaotic depending on whom I’m with. I am of more a burst of energy over collective efforts person. If I don’t like a subject I don’t try to be good at it. I’m willing to hear anybody out(no matter what it is). I see all shades of gray and not black n white. I prefer to lie to someone than tell them a hard truth, I also try and keep my emotions to myself. I don’t know if this has anything to do with personality but I’m VERY forgetful, I always forget why I’m somewhere or what I’m doing.
Interests: I draw, garden, bake, cook, play video games, go on walks. I can get into pretty much any fandom as long as it’s not boring. I like horror, animals, sports cars, art, and money.
Other info: INFP, Gemini, ambivert?(Depends on my mood), chaotic-neutral
Thank u, you don’t gotta do this
a/n: omg anon im a gemini infp too you just like me fr also i made this while playing roblox so sorry if it's shit also you literally look similar to me r u my evil twin or something
I MATCH YOU WITH...
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REALWORLD KEL!!!
ok so this is kind of me projecting on you because i love kel but i think u guys would get along really well
the two of u are pretty chaotic together, but he's a sweetie and respects it when you need a break
introduces you to all his friends and his basketball team and like shows you off
asks you to draw him and always wants to know what you're drawing
i feel like you'd spend a lot of time with BASIL as well, so KEL tends to tag along and the two of you try to teach him how to do things like garden and doodle
you make him breakfast sometimes and he always wolfs it down and tells you you're the best at baking/cooking, even if it's the most basic shit like toast and eggs
he likes to show you how to play basketball,, and the two of you just walk around and talk with the gang a lot
you guys play video games and watch horror movies together a lot
he likes u a lot, and he's kinda similar to u as he also sees every shade of grey, he's probably chaotic good or something good n he does a lot of the standing up in situations
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tcm · 4 years ago
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Interview with Richard Benjamin on Making Comedy Look Easy in MY FAVORITE YEAR (’82) By Donald Leibenson
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To hear Richard Benjamin tell it, MY FAVORITE YEAR was a charmed production. For his first film as a director, he had been looking for a comedy (“I’m just kind of bent that way,” he jokes) and the stars aligned to bring him a script that, he says, was everything he knew. He had Mel Brooks as the film’s guardian angel. He had a bona-fide movie star that his wife, Paula Prentiss, recommended after another actor regretfully declined the film’s plum role. And he heeded Carl Reiner, who gave him succinct advice about making a comedy: “Get funny people.”
Which he did. The film is character actor heaven, with Joseph Bologna, Anne de Salvo, Selma Diamond, Adolph Green, Basil Hoffman, Lainie Kazan and Bill Macy.
MY FAVORITE YEAR is set in the mid-1950s when television was live and comedy was king. Mark Linn-Baker stars as Benjy Stone, a young comedy writer on a variety show reminiscent of Your Show of Shows, where he ardently pursues the show’s not-amused production assistant (Jessica Harper). During one life-changing week, he is assigned to chaperone the show’s guest star, his idol, former swashbuckling screen hero, Alan Swann (Peter O’Toole in an Oscar-nominated performance), who has a penchant for drink, womanizing and otherwise behaving badly. 
Benjamin spoke with TCM about casting O’Toole, trying to pin down Mel Brooks and why you should never end a comedy in a graveyard.
To quote Alan Swann’s great line, dying is easy, comedy is hard. With MY FAVORITE YEAR, you make it look so easy. How did the project come to you?
Paula and I were in New York. My agent, David Gersh, sent the script by Norman [Steinberg] and Dennis [Palumbo, credited as co-writer due to the Screen Writers Guild arbitration]. I remember reading it in the hotel room and as I finished, I said, ‘This is everything I know.’ I was in high school when Your Show of Shows was on. I would get on the phone with my friend Shelley Berger, who I am still close to, and we would do all these routines they had done on the show on Saturday night. I grew up loving Errol Flynn and those swashbuckling movies. I had also worked at 30 Rockefeller Plaza [the film’s setting] as an NBC page and guide, and I knew every inch of that place. [The script] was right up my alley, as they say.
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Brooksfilms produced the film, and Mel Brooks was a writer on Your Show of Shows. Did he serve as the film’s guardian angel or offer any input?
Guardian angel’s good. He kept saying he would give Norman and I two full days to sit down and go over the script to see if we could make it even funnier. The truth of the matter is that the script didn’t need much of anything, but he promised that. Trying to get Mel to stop moving is a feat. We went to his house, and he invited us in and then said he was going out. He said he had to walk the dog. Then he comes back, and he said he had to go, that there was a crisis at Fox. I said, ‘No there’s not,’ and he said, ‘Well, there could be.’ So, what he ended up giving us was two hours, but it was a great two hours. And the next thing you know, he was gone.
But Norman and I came up with one of the best jokes in the movie while we were standing in his driveway watching him drive away. It’s the one where Swann falls off the roof and plummets past the two elitist guys. And one says, ‘I think Alan Swann’s beneath us,’ and the other guy says, ‘Of course he’s beneath us, he’s an actor.’
I cannot imagine anyone but Peter O’Toole as Alan Swann. Was he the first choice?
Albert Finney had been offered the role, but he had not committed. He was up in Sausalito making SHOOT THE MOON [’82]. They told me I had to go up there and convince him to do the film; otherwise they couldn’t make the movie. The list of people M-G-M would go with was very short, because who are you going to believe with a sword in their hands? So, I’m on this mission, because if he says yes, I’m going to get to make a movie. We arranged to have lunch together. He’s completely charming. I get ready to ask the question – which could change my life, by the way: ‘Will you do it?’ He said, ‘Well…,’ and I could tell it was going to be a no. He thought the script was really good, but he had done two or three movies in a row and he said he wanted to get back to the theater. Then he said to me, ‘Why don’t you get O’Toole?’ He said, ‘We do this all the time. I turn something down, he does it, he turns something down, I do it.’ When I got back home, Paula who had made WHAT’S NEW PUSSYCAT? [’65] with Peter, said, ‘Get Peter. He is perfect for this.’ Finney said it, Paula said it. And I asked [co-producer] Michael Gruskoff if M-G-M would make the film with O’Toole, and Michael said yes.  
What was the meeting with Peter like?
(Laughs) That meeting! That meeting was quite something. First of all, we couldn’t find him. We could tell we had the right person because the behavior was just like the character. He had a farm in Ireland with no phone. You had to call this pub to get a message to him. I called the pub and they said Peter wasn’t there. His agent didn’t know where he was. I called his manager and said, ‘We’re trying to find your client.’ He said, ‘He’s at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel. He’s been here for a week.’ 
So, I’m actually talking to Peter O’Toole, and he said he had heard about the project and to send him a script and we would get together the next day. I go over and there he is in a beautiful suite wearing a smoking jacket; he is the character. He said, ‘Here’s the thing…’ and I thought, ‘Here we go again.’ He said he liked it very much, but he hadn’t read the last ten pages and to please indulge him and he would call tomorrow. The next day, on the dot, he called and he said to turn to the last page of the script.
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Now, in the original script, there’s a scene which I shot that would have played after what’s in the movie. It took place in a Hollywood cemetery, and Benjy is walking past the gravestones. He says in voiceover that Alan Swann made him promise he would do something on his birthday every year. Alan has passed away, and Benjy comes to his grave, kneels down and pours a bottle of Courvoisier over the tombstone. That’s what’s on the last page. Peter asked me to read the date that was on the tombstone. It was Aug. 2. He said, ‘Aug. 2 is my birthday; did you know that?’ I asked Norman if he knew that, and Norman said no, he had made it up. And Peter says, ‘Therefore, I must do the film.’
What happened to that scene?
I was terribly reluctant to take that out because Peter did the movie because of it. But people at M-G-M said I couldn’t end a comedy in a cemetery. We had two audience screenings, one with that ending and one without it. In the screening with it, the audience enjoyed the picture, but the scene put a pall over things. Then we had the screening without it and the audience was very enthusiastic and very up as they came out.
How did you find Mark Linn-Baker?
Our casting director Ellen Chenoweth said the first person to get was Mark Linn-Baker. Mark came in and read and was terrific. I said, ‘This is my first movie, I can’t cast the first person who walks in here.’ I saw maybe 25 to 35 more—some really good people—but she was right, so after all of that, I said to get him.
Peter and Mark had great chemistry.
They seemed to hit it off right away, but later, back in L.A. after we shot the long scene on the roof, which played like a mini-farce, Peter came up to me and said, ‘I like the lad, you cast him well.’
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Was Peter game for the physical stunts?
I couldn’t stop him from doing them! The bathroom scene required him to fall headfirst into the wall. I came to him before we shot and I said, ‘The camera is so close, I can’t pad this wall.’ He said, ‘I was brought up in music hall. I can do this all day. Don’t concern yourself.’
Director Howard Hawks once said that a good movie was three or four good scenes and no bad scenes. I lose count watching MY FAVORITE YEAR of how many great scenes there are in it. Between those driven by comic banter, the TV sketches, the physical comedy scenes, the quieter romantic scenes and even the dramatic confrontations, did you have a favorite type to direct?
I can’t say there was a favorite. It’s all of a piece. I will tell you that one of the scenes I like is in the Stork Club and getting to do something that reminded me of all these kinds of wonderful comic movies I loved growing up. I do remember that one of the first things we shot was the scene in Central Park where Alan Swann mounts the horse. It just seemed to lack energy. And I was thinking, ‘I have to go tell Peter O’Toole that he has to pick up the pace and it has to be lighter.’ I went up to him and said, ‘It’s good, but…’ and before I could finish, he said, ‘You want it faster and funnier.’ I said, ‘You’ve got it,’ and he said, ‘And you shall have it.’ And I thought, ‘This directing thing is not so hard.’ (laughs)
Were there directors you worked with as an actor who particularly inspired you when you became a director? For example, you worked with one of the best, Mike Nichols.
Mike, yes. He directed me in the national company of Barefoot in the Park and [the film] CATCH-22 [’70]. Mike’s thing was he’d come up to you very quietly and say, ‘Just like in real life.’ That was his main thing. It meant that there should be no ‘acting’ here; your character responds to situations as they would in life. It’s like what [critic] Walter Kerr once said about Neil Simon’s jokes: They have the truth in them. This is what funny people know: You can’t try to get a laugh, because you won’t get it.  
At one point, Alan Swann says that doing the TV show was the most fun and the hardest work since the world was young. Was that what making MY FAVORITE YEAR was like for you?
It was the most fun, there’s no question of that. It was a magical experience because of the screenplay and everyone involved. Everyone’s game came up because of Peter. You don’t need many takes with him, that’s for sure. But how all of this came about and got to the point where I would be offered this, and what has to happen in your life to come to that moment – you can’t make it up. And when that moment comes, you’re hopefully ready. I was really fortunate.
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emptypaperbagg · 4 years ago
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an idea for an omori au
HI HI HI, sorry bUT HEAR ME OUT,, GHOST SUNNY AU. I’ve had so many little ideas for this popping up into my head lately, and I can no longer contain myself. I know that Omori is more psychological than paranormal, but I’m a sucker for ghost aus, sorry.
warning for spoilers and crack
Events take place after sometime after the Bad Ending of the game.
Sunny is still in Faraway for some reason, and he can’t figure out as to why. No one can see him or talk to him, and he can’t touch the world around him. Things in Faraway continue to go by, but Sunny doesn’t. He’s still here.
His friends aren’t here, nor is Mari.
He eventually settles with watching what everyone has been doing. After all, it seems it’s the only thing he can do.
They all appear to be sadder than before. Tired even. But they all continue on with their everyday lives.
He finds that Aubrey has been continuing to hang out with the Hooligans. Sometimes Kel would join them, but he’s usually playing basketball with some other kids. Hero left to go back to college some time ago. Basil’s staring at him.
At first, he thought that Basil was just staring at something behind him, but no. He’s staring right at him. Terrified.
Sunny opens his mouth to say something, but Basil let’s out a small sound between a screech and a scream. Then, the blond turns away, mumbling about something along the lines of this is all your imagination and you’re seeing a therapist for this kind of thing. When he turns around, Sunny is still there.
So now he’s more terrified. That’s great.
There are many different ways to execute this part, but eventually they both figure out that Sunny’s a ghost and Basil is apparently the only one who can see him.
So then they spend time together, I guess, mending the friendship that they had long ago. 
This part is important, I feel, because Sunny eventually becomes friends with the other’s again and was able to connect with them in a way during the game, but when it came to Basil, it wasn’t really all that great. Yes, Sunny saves him, but they didn’t really have that moment where they connect again.
Eventually, Basil starts asking him questions. “How are you here?”, “Why are you still here?”, and “Why did you do it?”
He doesn’t have answers.
Story progresses, Sunny tries to help Basil talk to the other’s again and bring everyone back together. They succeed. Everyone gets like +5 happiness. Yippee.
But Sunny is still there. He’s not supposed to be here. The two of them realize that Sunny has been here for a reason. -5 happiness.
The Truth. The truth needs to get out, and only Basil can tell them.
But Basil doesn’t want to tell them. He can’t. He knew that it was selfish, but he was afraid of their reaction, what they’d think. Would they think any worse of them? Things had already starting to look better for everyone. Most importantly, he didn’t want to lose Sunny. Not again. It’s the right thing to do, but he couldn’t bring himself to do so.
So beep boop, some drama here and there, dump in some angst, mix until fully combined, snack on the excess if you want, and vualá, you have an excellent meal.
It takes a lot of time for Basil to come into terms with this again, of course, but he eventually agrees.
He does the opposite of whatever Rick Astley told us and says goodbye, but more dramatic.
Truth get’s told aaAAAND THEN Basil get’s the shit beaten out of him the rest of them go through what the other fanfics do post good ending mINUS SUNNY and the hospital.
Then they live happily even after. Probably.
Feel free to flesh out this idea or change things, I know I don’t have the brain to do so. My apologies for the crack as well, I’m tired. I’ve contemplated over whether or not I’ll write something more serious and organized for this or maybe draw out some of it, but I thought nah and wrote this instead.
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arigatouiris · 4 years ago
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save me // tanjiro x reader
Author’s Note: This was requested by a sweet anon a while ago! I’m truly very sorry it took so long, and I really hope you like this! I kinda wrote a lot more than just a regular scenario haha, I mean, it’s Tanjiro and he’s babie I love him so much gahhh.
Word count: 3080 words
Pairing: Kamado Tanjiro x Reader
Warnings: SPOILERS FOR THE MANGA, fluff~ some mentions of blood and wounds, maybe? mainly fluff ya’ll
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Currently, your mind was screaming at you. 
You knew you were tired, your bones were aching, your eyes were heavier than they ever were in your life, and you could feel the dehydration numb your mind, the heaviness growing inch by inch. Yet, you knew you couldn’t let this overwhelm you. Who am I kidding? I am overwhelmed, you thought before biting a part of your tongue, enough to draw blood.
You had to stay awake, even if you were inches away from collapsing. Muzan was defeated, Tanjiro was safe, but you had to see him. You had taken part in the war, as well, assisting the hashira, making sure to stay alive for them—stay alive for your lover, Tanjiro, and ensure that Muzan was defeated once and for all. 
Come on, you trod on, but your legs were giving way. You were currently at the estate, Aoi screaming at you to get yourself checked first. You needed to see him. You couldn’t let yourself breathe if you didn’t. 
And then you did; Tanjiro looked almost like he was sleeping, but you couldn’t deny that he looked more beat up than he ever did before. Nezuko was there, who instantly got up and grabbed you before you fell to your knees.
     “Thank goodness...” 
When you woke up, your first thought was of Tanjiro. You shot up on the bed before hearing a soft giggle from your side; turning to spot a humanized Nezuko, your eyes start to tear up, your lips were quivering; here she was, everything that Tanjiro had fought for, the very source of his power—smiling at your form.
     “Nezuko-chan...” You said, before reaching out to her, embracing her as she put her arms around you carefully.
     “Thank you,” You heard her say, “For always taking care of my brother.”
You could not stop holding her. She was the essence of everything the man you loved had fought for, had struggled for, had been alive for; seeing her alive and well, and as a human being, only made your heart crumble. You were sobbing uncontrollably, before realizing that your lover’s dream had come true because he had fought so hard. What a pure soul, your mind kept repeating, before the growing urge to see him reminded you that your legs could move.
     “I need to see him.” You said, before struggling to get up, Nezuko helping you out.
     “You’ve always been there to help him out,” She said, turning to you as the two of you walk to the room he was in, “Each time he got injured.”
     “Ah, you remember?” 
Nezuko nodded, “I do, it’s a bit hazy, the memories I have, but they’re there. That’s why you were so familiar. Your smell feels like home.”
You blushed at what she said, but the truth was Tanjiro and Nezuko were your home. Ever since the first time you met Tanjiro to now, he had always been your home. It began with the way he smiled at you, or the way he calls out your name, or even at how his eyes land on you every time you were in his field of vision. Tanjiro ensured that you knew you were loved, and despite how much he had on his plate, you always felt like a priority.
*
The first time you met Tanjiro was when your good friend, Aoi, had her hands full. Shinobu-sama returned from Mount Natagumo, bringing with her several demon slayers who needed to be looked after. You weren’t exactly a doctor, but you had seen Aoi perform the basics on you so many times that you were more than willing to help out. 
It was then she introduced you to Tanjiro and his two friends. Apparently, the blond had shrunk into a spider and would need special medicine, Aoi jumping on that wagon before anyone had a say, and Inosuke didn’t particularly need anything but rest—which meant that he could heal by himself. 
     “You will have to give Tanjiro-san his medicine three times a day and makes sure he takes it,” She said, a stern look on her face, “Good thing is, he’s not as difficult as his friends are.”
You giggled at her statement before taking the medicine from her. You noticed that this Tanjiro person was asleep when you went over to him, which made you sit beside him and wonder what a Mizunoto like him was even doing near Mount Natagumo. And based on what you heard, this Mizunoto even gave a Lower Moon a run for his money.
When Tanjiro woke up, he spotted you, staring at him, a kind look in your eyes. His face instantly reddened, before attempting to sit up and politely ask you who you were.
     “Don’t move so much,” You said, handing him the cup of medicine, “You have cuts all over your body, Tanjiro-san.”
He couldn’t look away from you. Your eyes were a magnificent (e/c), glowing with an intensity Tanjiro had never witnessed before. A slash of silver crossed each one, the sun's reflection from the window made them sparkle like dancing crystals. The (e/c) irises were swirling in circles, creating the illusion that your eyes were never-ending. Flecks of darker (e/c) clustered around each pupil made Tanjiro’s breath catch in his throat. Suddenly, every feeling of ache, dismay, and sorrow vanished, almost as if he had never felt them before. Something about your eyes held him in place, as if he had found a balance, blanketing him in a cocoon of comfort, free of worries and concerns.
     “Tanjiro-san?” You tilted your head, your eyes burning him.
He gulped down the medicine before replying in a low voice that it was good, before looking back at you with a burning face. You leaned forward, not helping his case, and placed a caring hand on his forehead.
     “You look like you’re burning up, are you feeling alright?”
He could only nod. He could smell you, even though you were a few inches away from him. It was a sweet smell of flowers and a mild basil, refreshing and incredibly intoxicating.
The second time you met Tanjiro, it was evident that the boy had taken a liking toward you. You smile to yourself each time you take care of him, assigning yourself the task of making sure he was patched up. You were currently dressing a wound on his right shoulder, which left him shirtless and a tad bit too shy.
     “This will sting.” You informed, before earning no wince or reaction from the boy when you placed the cotton with the disinfectant on his wound.
You looked at him biting his lip, swallowing the wince before it came. You giggled, alerting him before shaking your head at his non-verbal question.
     “Aoi-san told me you’re also a demon slayer.” He said, suddenly.
You nodded, “I don’t get too many missions, though. Oyakata-sama likes that I do both these things.”
     “I think it’s quite admirable,” You look at Tanjiro smiling at you, “Helping people and killing demons.”
You smile at him before saying a soft ‘thank you’ and continued dressing the wound. You knew he had a couple of broken ribs, and there was another wound on his left knee that needed dressing as well. As much as you wanted Tanjiro to be safe and careful, killing demons was a dangerous task on its own—and Tanjiro just coming back to you in one piece was more than what you could ask for.
Your eyes widened at your own thoughts. Coming back to me?
You look at Tanjiro who was staring at you, the two of you continue to make eye-contact before both looking away at the same time. You clear your throat before getting up, mumbling something incoherent about bringing some medicine for his ribs, and scooting out of there.
The next time you meet Tanjiro was right after your own mission. You spotted him in a town, looking around, with a box on his back—the same box that you wondered carried a demon inside. You knew it was a demon, but you didn’t dare ask why Tanjiro carried it on his shoulder. You trusted that he’d tell you when he was ready, but right then, your eyes widened when a girl jumped out of the box, ready to pounce.
Your heart was stuck in your throat before realizing that the girl was pouncing at another demon. You were visibly confused, before rushing to where Tanjiro was, assisting him. 
     “(y/n)-chan?”
You nodded once before witnessing one of the most bizarre things you had ever seen in your life. A demon fighting another demon?
     “I’ll attack the demon from behind,” He knew instantly that you were talking about the other demon and not Nezuko. “Are you sure she... She won’t—”
     “She won’t attack you, I promise.” 
Nodding once, you quickly jumped on the side of a house to your right and landed right behind the other demon. Breathing slowly, you quietly unsheathed your sword and stabbed the demon from the back, keeping it in place.
     “Tanjiro-san! Behead it now!”
He didn’t need to be told twice. Once the demon was slayed, you turned around to spot the female demon approach Tanjiro, touching his open wound on his arm softly before looking at it almost...sadly? 
     “What...” 
Tanjiro looked at you, before giving you an apologetic smile.
     “This is Nezuko, she’s my sister.”
Your heart broke at his words, before noticing Nezuko give you what you thought was a smile. Despite it not being an action you would normally perform, you went over to Nezuko and patted her head, only to have her embrace you tightly. Your eyes were wide, before tears prickled in the corner. 
     “I’ll turn her back into a human no matter what.”
You placed one arm around her waist before pulling her in tighter for an embrace. I know you will, you thought, before letting the tears fall. 
You later lead Tanjiro to the grove of wisteria trees near the village they were in. It was already dark, which meant that it was too late for them to head back to the estate. Making sure Nezuko is inside the box, you patch Tanjiro’s wound up, like on any other regular day. Tanjiro assured you that Nezuko was fine and probably asleep, which calmed you down. 
     “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier...” 
You shook your head, “No, I understand why you’d want to keep this to yourself.”
     “The Hashira know about this, and.. and Oyakata-sama as well. Tomioka-san and... well, it’s fine now. I am confident that I’ll turn Nezuko back into a human. She hasn’t hurt anyone so far, and she thinks of humans as her family.”
     “She seems very sweet, Tanjiro-san,” You tell him, “I adore her already.”
I adore you, he thought, face turning red by the second.
It didn’t take you long to take out the first-aid kit you had made for yourself and start working on Tanjiro’s open wound on his arm. He openly winced this time, not afraid to show you his expression, and you shushed him softly, your aura calming his soul. However, it did little to quell his nervousness. Tanjiro wasn’t often nervous, he could control his emotions to the best of his abilities, but right then, there was no use.
The nervousness made him feel nauseous, almost like he had two hearts frantically beating in his chest, instead of one.
He looked up to see you sporting a soft smile on your face, enhancing how beautiful you looked under the light the wisteria flowers offered. You had the most enchanting of smells, pickled with softness, childlike wonder and unbridled strength. You were intoxicating.
You felt him looking at you, and you slowly raised your eyes to meet his, your faces inches apart. You almost gasped at how intense his gaze was, a magnetic pull kept you in place. Tanjiro’s uninjured hand grazed your cheek, before he smiled at you, his heart racing and so was yours; your free hand touched his that was on your face. A second later, a soft breeze blew and Tanjiro winced because his wound was still open.
     “Ah, I’m so sorry—”
     “N-No, don’t be...” 
You couldn’t believe the wind had cock-blocked you.
The next time you saw Tanjiro, you were being patched up by Aoi in the butterfly estate. Aoi was scolding you because your wound could have been avoided, and perhaps, this was what led Tanjiro to enter the room you were in. Your heart skipped a beat when he entered the room, a soft smile on his face.
     “Tanjiro-san, can you take over?” Aoi said, walking out briskly. 
You giggled when Tanjiro took the ball of cotton and dipping it in disinfectant. 
     “The tables have turned.” He said, shooting you a smile that broke your heart.
     “Hm, yes.” You were nervous, because the last time you saw him, the two of you almost...
...almost...
The mere thought of it caused your face to redden instantly, but you hoped Tanjiro didn’t notice. You looked at him, who was occupied by the wound on your elbow. Perhaps, he felt you staring at him and his gaze met yours. 
     “(y/n)-san, the other day—”
     “Tanjiro!” 
A strange voice screamed from the entrance, causing you and Tanjiro’s eyes to widen. A blond entered the room and upon glancing at you, he paused before gasping.
     “Are you hitting on an injured woman!? Tanjiro, I thought you were decent!”
You blinked, cluelessly.
     “He’s just helping me, though?”
     “That’s just Zenitsu, ignore him.”
You couldn’t ignore him. In fact, you wanted him out of the room instantly so you could finally kiss the boy you were deeply in love with. But, apparently no. You sighed before focusing on the wound and the boys who were now arguing about you. 
You turn around and spot Tanjiro, sporting a kind but helpless smile toward his friend Zenitsu, which only made your smile grow in retaliation. You didn’t know what caused the blond to suddenly stop, perhaps he heard something outside that distracted him, but his face turned red and he patted Tanjiro on the back and left you alone with him again. It’s alright, you thought before biting your lower lip, I’ll tell him next time.
You didn’t realize that next time came too early. That night, you noticed Tanjiro sitting on the engawa, reading a manuscript. 
     “Can I bother you for a bit?”
Tanjiro’s head shot toward you, and a welcoming smile plastered on his face. 
     “You’re never a bother.” His voice was low, sending shivers down your back.
     “You sure?” You giggled before sitting by him, “I can be quite annoying.”
It was Tanjiro’s turn to chuckle, “I was the eldest of six children, give it your best shot.”
You raised your hands in defence and laughed, “Alright, alright, you win!”
     “(y/n)-san,” His voice was earnest, you could listen to it all day, “I have to tell you something—”
     “I love you, Tanjiro-san,” You place a hand on his cheek before leaning forward and kissing him.
He took a few seconds to kiss you back, holding your hand that was on his cheek. A moment later, you pulled away, giggling.
     “Was that annoying enough?”
     “Not quite,” Just as his lips ghosted over yours, “Why don’t we try that again?”
Tanjiro would tell you he loves you each time he saw you after that. Whether it was just moments ago, or after a few days, or even a week, he would never miss letting you know how he felt about you. It warmed your heart not only because he had a lot of things on his mind, but simply because, he didn’t want you to think you were any less of a priority. You felt special, and Tanjiro, whether it was because he was the eldest in the family, always knew how to take care of you.
*
When Tanjiro woke up, he felt his body scream in pain, but there was a bittersweet feeling to it. His eyes travelled to his left, the night sky was dark—he was certain by the smell of the air that it was perhaps too late in the night to wake anyone up. His eyes widened when he smelt another familiar scent in the air, causing him to turn to the right side of his bed, finding you lounged over, fast asleep.
His eyes warmed at the mere sight of you, and he thought of all those times that you had taken care of him. With the way his left hand was, he wasn’t sure if he could ever use it, but he was alive and he was grateful.
Slowly, he patted your head as softly as he could with his right hand, careful not to wake you up. But, that did little to ease his interest, it stirred you awake nonetheless. His heart fell at the sight of your groggy form, wiping away the little bit of sleep that was still attached to your eyelids, and looking at him.
     “I’m sorry I woke you.” 
Tears fill your eyes instantly before you push yourself to him, hugging him and just pressing yourself to him; you felt his right hand envelop your form and it was then you broke down. He was safe, he was awake and fine; it might have been a month, but he was here now. He was with you.
     “You’re always saving me, (y/n)-san. I can’t tell you how much I love you. How grateful I am.”
You laugh at how preposterous his words sounded to you, before pulling away and giving him such a witty look. He cocked one eyebrow before tilting his head in confusion.
     “I love you,” Tanjiro’s blush intensified, “And I want to do everything I can to ensure you’re with me, if anything, I think that sounds selfish,” You wipe the little bit of tears that were threatening to fall out, 
     “I might as well kidnap you and keep you locked in a cage.” You said, chuckling.
You have heard Tanjiro laugh before, but when he laughs right then, your heart echoes with it. It was a warming sight. His right hand reaches to your face before pulling you swiftly toward him, placing your forehead to his, and he presses a soft kiss to the tip of your nose.
     “It won’t be kidnapping if I come willingly, right?”
Ah, sure, you think before closing the gap. He just had to be a flirt too.
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retphienix · 4 years ago
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Alright, this is gonna be tough because I desperately want to say so much for the game's sake and my own, but it's just so much.
At least the playthrough as a whole exists to show a lot of those things, and there's no shame in some of the impacts the game had for myself going unsaid :)
LONG POST INCOMING, NO 'READ MORE' BECAUSE IT'S RELEVANT TO THE POST AND NOT AN AFTER-THOUGHT
CLICK 'J' ON YOUR KEYBOARD TO SKIP. (Sorry mobile users)
8:48 - Do you have any idea how good a step forward it felt to smash the repressing bulb?
9:50 - So I'll get ahead of myself because this fight shows a lot of the visuals that play into this: Something being the manifestation of guilt for Mari is so incredibly visualized.
Between the base 'Something' being extremely close to the shadow she cast and including the one visible eye that bore down on Sunny and Basil after the hanging, to the stairs incorporating into the design.
The seaweed and spider are more general anxieties though they do circle back to Mari since she saved Sunny, but those two forms don't feel as directly related as the stairs (heights) and base 'Something' forms and what they represent for his repressed guilt.
Could be wrong ;) Tell me what you saw in the forms of 'Something' if you'd like to expand on them :)
12:39 - Just to prove the point before you get to fully see the truth- Something morphs into the figure of Mari hanging. It doesn't fully demonstrate the "eye" aspect yet, but still I just wanted to say kudos on the way 'Something' is shown visually. Formless for a reason, and that form becomes more defined as you understand what it is, exceptional damn thing.
15:43 - Basil's part in all of this makes me so damn sad. Plenty to say later (obviously), but he harbors so much guilt, wants forgiveness so much, and is so (not shown yet) desperate to believe in Sunny's innocence while knowing but not comprehending the truth. The fact he harbors his own 'Something' due to the guilt of all this is heartbreaking, these kids endured a hell no one should. Losing someone so important to you and harboring the guilt and fault of it when nothing of the sort was intended. A childish fight with raised emotions got out of hand and all this came of it.
Hell.
16:30 - I absolutely adore how the photo album is used for this reveal.
Absolutely incredible execution that's specific to this story and its characters and makes piecing (literally) this together tense and grim.
22:27 - I NEVER SPOKE TO OR INTERACTED WITH THE THING IN THE CENTER OF THIS ROOM AND I'M A NORMAL AMOUNT OF UPSET ABOUT THAT >:( lol
29:41 - Okay.
So this reveal as a whole is so unbelievably well paced and incredibly hard hitting.
All game long there's a weight of having lost Mari. Repeatedly it's told that she killed herself and no one can understand why and everyone (MYSELF THE PLAYER INCLUDED) is looking for meaning in little moments, seeking out hints that maybe she was suffering or depressed or this or that.
And while that has gone on FOR THE ENTIRE GAME there has also been this uneasy weight surrounding Sunny/Omori. Visions of Mari twisted and deformed into phantoms of horror.
For the most part I assumed it was just him coping with having lost his sister and maybe a dialogue on how when she was alive he was in her shadow (in his mind) and now that she's gone he remains there?
That was the best I could figure, more or less. But it continued to seem more and more malicious in design and MUCH more 'heavy' in how it's presented as a shadow behind Omori/Sunny throughout his adventure and life.
The weight and 'overshadowed' looks of the scenes felt more and more foreboding and less like a simpler "I'm living in her shadow" story, but I couldn't figure out what it was.
Then these pictures come out and piece things together.
The final result:
Sunny and Mari fighting. (Context appears to be his growing disdain towards playing. It's stated he loved playing, but it's also shown that he begins to dislike how much Mari is dragged away for classes and the like up to and including playing. So my read was that Sunny was upset that their fleeting time together was dedicated to the recital and broke his violin in an emotional blur and the fight occurred.
Alternatively it was accidentally broken and both of their emotions were running high as it happened)
Mari falling to her death.
Sunny and Basil carrying her upstairs and tending to her.
Sunny breaking down as it sinks in.
The visions having Basil say "It's going to be okay" by the bedside. (I perceive that as a memory of what Basil was saying as he tried to manage his emotions during the event)
Sunny and Basil carrying her back downstairs and to the backyard.
The makeshift noose.
And finally the sight that burned itself into Sunny's eyes of her hanging after it was all said and done.
Just holy shit to it all in how it's revealed and handled.
Stories have twists all the time, and I ain't gonna make some bold claim like "Most unpredictable!" "Best twist!" "What a twist!" or whatever, though that'd be funny.
I just want to say this twist worked BEFORE the reveal as a foreboding sense of unease and curiosity- it lent itself to intentionally vague and easily misconstrued explanations, basically- instead of it outright misleading you beyond the characters that believe the lie repeating the lie, it allowed you to mislead yourself.
It did the twist the right way! And well! YOU trick YOURSELF! The people repeating the lie are being lied to or have motivation to repeat the lie! The GAME isn't lying (as so many twists handle it) the game is giving the world reason to mislead and allowing you to be mislead!
Now am I yelling affirmations for the way things SHOULD ALWAYS BE! YES! BUT THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S NOT AS NORMAL AS IT SHOULD BE! lol
31:40 - All the "You will really miss them"s hurt :(
33:25 - Right out the gate, a spoiler for what isn't here:
I looked up the alternate endings of the neutral route and my heart hurts to know Sunny doesn't stick around and Basil dies :(
34:00 - BASIL BEING OVERWHELMED WITH DENIAL AND GUILT AS HE ATTEMPTS TO MENTALLY PROTECT HIS VIEW OF WHO HIS FRIEND IS BY INVENTING A SECOND PARTY THAT DID THIS IS SO FUCKING REAL AND AMAZINGLY DONE.
And it explains the name behind the 'Something'.
'Something' behind you did it. There's 'Something' behind you, isn't there.
'Something' all around us, that potentially being the truth comin' in.
When 'Something' ruined my photos, Basil repressing protecting Sunny by destroying the proof.
Just expertly done.
'Something' being repression of the memory and impending guilt. Dannnng.
36:26 - It's 24 hours after I beat the game as I type all this so here's a gag.
Here's the part where Basil beats some sense into his friend, because after this Sunny gets knocked out and wakes up 200% improved and ready to save Basil from his own guilt by releasing them both from the secret.
So basically Kel dragged us out of bed, then a couple days later Basil beats us up, and that's how Sunny gets better :^) Game Over.
38:46 - This fight made me feel utterly terrible, a highlight being the energy bar saying "Everything is going to be okay".
or at 40:17 - when Basil pokes out Sunny's eye and the screen does this? That's an underutilized but always awesome visual.
41:12 - I THOUGHT I WAS DEAD AT THIS POINT :)
Because just before entering Basil's home on this night you see his Grandma's ghost here. So seeing Sunny here told me "WELL. YOU FUCKED UP!"
42:25 - Like I said, beat some sense into Sunny.
Here's the mental side of things where Basil's beatin' told Sunny to go remember the good times and confront his inner self and I'm being partially facetious because there's plenty to say about what's coming up.
43:15 - Goosebumps every time due to the sincerity and hope of this.
43:40 - Hug for anyone needing that.
51:11 - I could cry again and I just might before this post is done being put together.
This accident was never meant to be.
55:09 - Timestamp is arbitrary, I won't go over every flashback but I do want to say what a beautiful way to use these photos. To relive the memories? To find the strength to overcome and all that? After all these years of suppressing memories? DANNNG I love this game.
1:04:09 - I stepped in poop.
1:04:15 - Barefooted.
1:04:22 - I embraced my failure.
1:12:00 - The violin.
1:13:00 - "The anxious feeling-" "They believed in you" "No matter what you didn't want to disappoint them" I'm filled with love and gonna cry about it.
1:14:00 - So an important theme in the game, as if it has just one, is Sunny suppressing emotions and demonizing himself.
Obviously the ending shows him breaking free from both but I think it's important as hell to look at how he builds up to being able to.
After all the dark moments show him as a bloodied monster, demonstrate a perceived lack of remorse for what he's done (as in he sees himself so poorly that he says "I must not have felt bad about it, I'm a monster", not that he actually doesn't feel bad about it, that he thinks he shouldn't because he's bad), have him stab dream Basil to protect his repression of the memory, the build up to breaking free from that is him remembering the good in him through the lens of his friends.
Both in the real world and in revisiting the memories within the photos.
He hears about the good in himself that he has pretended isn't there and finds the power to overcome this deadened shell he's made.
He learns how to forgive himself by finally remembering he's worthy of forgiveness and is more than his mistake, that even the person he grievously harmed would want him to forgive himself and would understand the mistake didn't define him.
1:15:15 - Just because you did something bad doesn't make you bad, to put it more eloquently than my rambles. He had to learn that.
1:19:20 - I've done this fight 4 times.
You may be wondering why 4 times, it ain't like I replayed the game a ton or anything.
The short of it is:
1) For the good ending :)
2) To see what happens if you go "up" in the hospital- it's a dead end- I assumed it'd be a bad ending. So I got the good ending again :)
3) For the bad ending.
4) FOR THE GOOD ENDING TO WIPE THE HORRIBLE FEELING IN THE PIT OF MY STOMACH AWAY FROM THE BAD ENDING :)
In doing so I did get one layer deeper on the BG of Omori in the fight, here it is:
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And I learned on the fourth run that the fight is simpler than I gave it credit lol, Cherish refills your juice, so there is no reason to use Encore. You can get to the end (and deeper more easily) by just using the triple attack and Cherish and Calm down when necessary.
1:29:00 - A summary of the fight is that it's extremely impactful emotionally, but very obviously isn't a "Fun fight". It's great mechanically and story wise for what it's trying to do :)
I'll just say it here: I'm surprised there wasn't an end-game "Omori" fight, you know, in dream world? Because combat is SO good in this. I am lead to believe that the Omori route where you never go outside in the real world has more bosses and zones and would fill what I just implied I wanted- but you're also railroaded into the Neutral endings which are both sad :(
And honestly? That makes sense and I applaud the decision :) Embracing the fantasy world for more 'fights' isn't exactly the path to recovery. Also and I know someone will be bothered I say this because *I'm* bothered I'm saying this- it makes sense since a big predecessor did the same thing lol.
Undertale Genocide has new bosses and a harder end game challenge (Sans) while being the worse ending, while the good ending has a flashy and story/emotionally impactful final fight that isn't as challenging because challenge isn't the point of the morals being explored.
I just bring it up because it's interesting, has a parallel, and after fighting Omori 4 times I really REALLY wanted to do an end-game fight in Dream World.
1:30:00 - forgive me as I cry again. goosebumps and more.
OH NO~!
DRAT!
So I use a cheap video editor and I use the free format of it which limits to 720p and I didn't think twice of it.
I recorded at max, but downgraded after editing.
At 720p you can't see the detail that made me break down crying!
At 1:31:55 Sunny's eyes go wider as he sees Mari as they finally get to experience the duet in this dream state (White Egret Orchid, this is real and happening, I'm taking this to my grave :'( ) he sees her smile and that smile made me break down, but in the 720 it's blurry :(
That's on me, I could have posted the scene raw in HQ but I didn't know it'd compress just enough to be invisible :(
still. that duet scene can make me cry on command. just because of that alone, but also the entire thing.
1:33:42 - Sunny breaks from his shell and feels his emotions again.
1:37:07 - I wish every game would end with a mirror to see yourself.
The 'Despite everything, it's still you' vibe just cements all the growth and experiences that have happened as so much more real when that happens. Bonus points because mirrors in Omori are a time bomb where you can be reminded of the guilt following you- and this one is safe. This one is pure and clean. You did it.
1:37:50 - As I said earlier, going up does nothing. Dead end.
1:39:00 - I have to tell you something.
Simple ending. And yet slams me like two trucks. I'm so proud.
1:41:00 - Post credits scene.
This is so heartwarming and their smiles are the purest thing in the entire world.
1:42:50 - BAD ENDING RECORDING.
All I'll say on that is the bad ending made me feel terrible inside. Give up, live in your bubble, and subconsciously end it all so you never have to confront reality again.
My gut felt heavy to be honest.
And the fact that THAT is when Bo En Time is played is INCREDIBLE.
Having the sky shift like that gave goosebumps and cemented my dread.
Just seeing it now has me feeling very poorly.
Okay. Video done.
Now for general thoughts.
First off this White Space cycle has been going on for YEARS with Sunny only getting worse as he suppresses things more and more and the reason he found the strength to overcome is because of his friends and I'm gonna yell about it.
THE REASON SUNNY IS BREAKING FREE CAN BE DIRECTLY POINTED AT KEL THINKING "FUCK IT, I'M ABOUT TO LOSE A FRIEND, AND I DON'T WANT TO"
And I just think that is sweet as hell. The strength was inside himself, but the problem itself caused Sunny to demonize and not trust himself- he needed someone to break him free and help convince him that he's not irredeemable. And boom.
The way this game handles Denial and even gives it physical form with the 'Something's that both Sunny and Basil harbor is just awesome.
I touched on it but combat in Omori is very, very good.
I've said it here and there as I played and I feel like going at length in the finale post is pointless because this isn't a review but to put it concisely.
Types changing mid-combat, the character archetypes being so well defined, the follow up system, combat in Omori is some top notch turn based RPG stuff.
Like up there with the greats, the timeless masterpieces. This is GOOD fighting. So it was surprising the good ending didn't emphasize it- I explained why that makes sense, but even still! It'd probably be lesser for it (as explained previously) but it's interesting they practiced that restraint for the message they wanted to send.
Repeatin' that Mari's smile in the recital made me cry. Burned in my brain.
I'm still surprised I got the post credits scene because I DID water the plants a lot but when the game showed me them all dead I assumed that was the fail condition.
I genuinely do want to try the Omori route some time down the road. I hope I get around to it.
I am slightly dissuaded just because the Omori route only gets the neutral endings which are not Good To Be Blunt :(
But I want to see what dream content there is and I hear there are other bosses!
Other small bits from my notes:
Replacing denial (the black bulb) with hope (the white bulb) was good as heck.
The imagery of the 'Something' is so top notch- using the shadow of her body combined with the piercing gaze of her single eye- MY GOD.
The fragility of life being so present- between memories of near death experiences, to the way in which Mari dies, to the ease at which either Basil or Sunny can end the game. It's tense and heart-wrenching.
The way the 'Something' behind Sunny almost always shadows over him like an ever present weight.
Tearful, hopeful, pure, kids enduring a guilt metric tons heavier than their bodies could ever handle and finally, finally moving beyond it.
I said more in a personal post, and I'll reblog that.
Honestly, just timestamping through the video took it out of me and got the point across.
Omori is a wonderful game.
It's definitely a favorite for me, high up there on my list.
Between the themes, the gameplay, the humor, the ending.
This is a good one.
And now I get to end having experienced all the care and love in this title, that's such a sweet thing.
Now I know this finale post is a mess, illegible even. I have gotten sloppier as I've begun embracing just 'experiencing and rambling' and perhaps my formatting with change yet again until I find something more easily shared.
Despite that. I want to thank any who popped in on this playthrough.
This was a good one, a highlight of the blog for sure- and I'm always happy when I see some people enjoying the absolute mess I toss online when I do one of these :P
So thank you for your time, and thank you to any ridiculous enough to read my nonsense here.
Have a good one :)
And just as expected I feel I've said nothing and barely touched the surface as the post-game-head of mine does a poor job lol. Even still :P
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flying-elliska · 4 years ago
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Skam France Season 6 Review
It’s that time, I guess. My feelings are, like many, mixed. I think I enjoyed the season more than most people here, but the ending was a massive let down. Overall it boils down to this : Skam France is great at moments and very bad at structure. A lot of my issues with the season is what is not in it. I saw so much potential that never quite materialized, and it left me frustrated. At the same time, Lola is a really cool character, her arc is really interesting, her relationship with her sister is one of the best things they’ve ever done, and the actors killed it. Loved La Mif, discovering other sides of Eliott, the urbex backgrounds, and Maya. A lot of fascinating character moments. This is definitely my second favorite season after s3 - at times I even thought it would equal it. Sadly, though, Skam France will remain a bit of a one hit wonder for me. Because they are so good at bringing up problems in a nuanced layering way - be it addiction, grief, eating disorders, internalized ableism, racist microagressions - but when it comes to resolving what they brought up, they default towards a ‘let’s all be nice to each other, hug or kiss, love saves the day yay !’ story. Which is, when you claim to deal with real world issues, simplistic, immature, and at times quite offensive. It works for s3, which is at its core a tale of self-discovery, self-acceptance and romance. But niceness doesn’t solve racism, and family problems aren’t solved with a hug, and addiction recovery doesn’t hinge on having someone to kiss, and the series came dangerously close to implying that at times. 
All in all, this is a show that often manages to be both brilliant and terrible at the same time. At least it’s not dull. 
Positives/Negatives/Meh breakdown :
Positives :
- Sisterly love : My favorite thing without a doubt is the relationship between Lola and Daphné. Flavie and Lula killed it. Almost all the clips that made me cry were the ones with the both of them in it. At the beginning their rivalry is so relatable to me : the responsible sibling who takes on too much burdens and is too controlling and parentified vs. the problem sibling who acts out to express the issues the rest of the family are repressing - i have been in both of those spots. you can see how they slowly realize that the gap between them didn’t need to be there, that it wasn’t their fault, that it was the result of their parent’s bullshit and even shittier circumstances. seeing them make little gestures to recognize each other’s pain, to nurture each other, to give each other support, but also to tell each other some unpleasant truths, was so incredibly powerful. Relationships between sisters can be just so...complex, and loving, and petty, and jealous, and supportive, and feral, and annoying, and understanding, and ugh, they made me feel all of that and more. I have a sister, and I have a relationship like that with her, and this season gave me some very important perspectives. Really, relationships between women aren’t explored enough, and this season really did this one thing excellently and if only for that, it deserves to be watched. That moment where Lola talks to Daphné about her self destructive tendencies...so important. I am so happy that Daphné was the one finding Lola in her tower of solitude, and the moment where she says ‘you pay too much attention to what other people think, Lola’ was the emotional turning point of the season for me, because it was Daphné recognizing Lola really cared behind her mask of coldness, but also that she was hurt by that and that she needed to love herself regardless of the love her parents didn’t give her ; and also that she heard Lola saying it to her and that it inspired her too, so there is this amazing reciprocity. It was so powerful, I’m still reeling from it. And it was a beautiful full circle from the beginning of the season. 
- Family of outsiders : the urbex gang was such a wonderful new group this season. It was bound to be tricky getting us to like this new generation, and I think they did a pretty good job. Even tho I wish we got to know them a bit more, they were all intriguing and interesting on their own, and the vibes of Lamif as a whole were just so fun and lovely. Loved the neuroatypical vibes I got from Sekou and Jo. Love that they introduced a trans guy character. Loved Maya as group mom. And seeing them warm up to Lola was really sweet. The social media of them hanging out was more or less the only good social media we got this season lmao. The urbex thing was a great symbol for Lola finding a home with the outcasts, a bit on the fringe of society, and the start of acceptance, of bringing her in from the cold. Maya and Lola’s relationship fit in that really nicely, especially the bits about them talking about their shared experiences of grief, and my favorite scenes with them is showing Lola that her scars can be beautiful and that her rough experiences are part of who she is. The way she didn’t take Lola’s bullshit was great, and even tho I think their relationship was rushed, overall they really fit well together. Love Maya’s character as a concept in general, this funky purple haired lesbian environmentalist with amazing sense of style, and I really hope we see her again in upcoming seasons. And finally, I also really liked Eliott and Lola’s friendship (except for the ending) - the fact that they understand this darkness that they share, but that Eliott has succeded in climbing over it, and so he can give Lola support, understanding, guidance. I loved that we got to hear a bit more of his perspective on mental illness, the good and the bad times, that we saw his passion for movies become more real. I loved the fact that they bonded over creative things and photography, too, and that she found a safe space in the video store. And even tho it wasn’t resolved properly, the scene where he comes to get her and punches Aymeric really made me cry. Also, BASILE. Best bro in law ever. Their scenes together were so homey and warm and sweet. They will have such a good relationship in time. Overall, I really like how central friendship was in this season, shown as so powerful and important. They could have done more with it but I love a lot of what we got. I am just a sucker for found family, man.
- Lola herself : I know she was a controversial character right from the start. She’s been called manipulative, selfish, out of control, toxic. And honestly at times...maybe she was a bit. I still love her. She is just so interesting to me. The lack of compassion towards her in the fandom was seriously depressing at times, and often felt like a symptom of something I’ve seen in a lot of different fandoms, ie the capacity to only tolerate moral ambiguity when it’s attached to attractive white male characters - and to only tolerate mental illness symptoms when they can be romanticized. In the end, she’s a struggling teen from a deeply dysfunctional family who’s had a very rough life, of course she’s not going to be well adjusted. All in all, I think she’s so brave, and she is a fighter. I adored her feral energies in the trailer. I also really liked her blunt honesty at times, even if it was sometimes hurtful and excessive. I think because I have the opposite tendency to be afraid to speak my mind, I really dig a character who isn’t afraid to speak the ugly truth. Even though, again, ‘the truth’ isn’t always cut and clear, and what Lola is often doing instead is listening to ‘depression voice’ who tells her to believe the worst in people. I find that fascinating, because in my experience, yes, depression comes with this terrible lucidity that makes you see through a lot of bullshit but at the same time, is distorting your perspective because of fear and shame, and kicking that, and disentangling your perception from that fatalism, is very complicated. I loved how genuine she was, how mature too sometimes through the pain, more mature than she should have been. It was rough watching her relapse, but I think the portrayal of addiction was pretty very well done overall, not romanticized and explained in a very coherent way. I wish the show had given her a bit more of a clearer view of her inner thoughts towards the end and let her apologize a bit more. And a clearer realisation that her parent’s lack of well expressed love didn’t doom her. But...yeah Following her really made me question my own - more hidden - self destructive impulses, linked to family shit, that pushes me to sabotage and isolate myself. Like Eliott said to her - it’s really a lifelong struggle. I think overall her arc was pretty satisfying, learning to step away from the edge, letting people in, seeing that she isn’t alone, accepting she deserves better and that her failures don’t doom her. That it is about getting up and trying again. Love her using her mother’s camera and wanting to get a phoenix tattoo, a perfect symbol for her. Also Flavie was amazing, she’s got a bright future ahead.
Negatives :
- No follow up to the assault storyline : The thing that I am, without any single doubt, most mad about, is the fact they didn’t bring up the sexual assault again. Along with Charles’ rape apologism, this creates a very dubious pattern of trivializing the issue ‘as long as it’s not real rape’. The fact that the morning after immediately turns to Elu drama is what sort of started my disconnect from the season, and the fact that they don’t bring it up afterwards even once made me angry. I think Lola, before going back to the hospital, should have told someone about the abuse she endured there, and should have told someone about Aymeric, even if only to acknowledge she wants to be done with that part of her life. Aymeric is like...Lola’s biggest villain, in a sense, he is a horrible predator but he also somehow represents her worst impulses, that part of herself that tells her she doesn’t deserve better, and I think that as a character, he was interesting, and he should have been adressed/exorcised better. If Lola was a real person, of course, she would probably have to deal with this in therapy, down the line, later, but as a story, never adressing this again left it unfinished. And this is really the kind of event you NEED catharsis and resolution for. Otherwise, it’s irresponsible.
- A generally overstuffed and disjointed structure : My biggest problems with this season are about what isn’t and what isn’t it. I liked most of the clips, I don’t have an issue with them going dark, strangely enough, but the way they were put together was just...messy. Like many people have said, too much stuff not properly adressed. Palm of most annoyingly useless subplot, the whole Tiff thing. Yes, it was cool comparing her clique to Lamifex and Lola realizing she wants nothing to do with those shallow fake bitches. Sekou hacking her account to replace it with pigeons, amazing. After that though, it should have been DONE, and in general, it should have taken a lot less time and attention. Comparing Tiff’s social media addiction to Lola’s issues felt like some trivializing bullshit. The whole thing was just so annoying. It would have been good if it had led to some discussion of social inequality but like...not this shit. Char, equally useless (although, cool actress, cool style). Another MASSIVE problem is the lack of follow through on big clips. A great thing about SKAM, usually, is that it shows you the aftermath of big moments - characters lying in bed, cuddling, talk to their friends, crying in the shower, etc. It allows the viewer to breathe and really get into the character’s perspective, to be comforted and process drama, and for the emotions to resonate better, to have space to develop richly. Here...we had Lola brush off her assault, we saw nothing after Daphné got her back from the tower thinking she could have killed herself, we learned that they had money problems and the father didn’t go to work and then that was never adressed again and the light was turned back on by magic (????), we saw Eliott go on a major bender and didn’t really see how he got better, etc. Big lack of introspective clips in the latter part of the season took me out of Lola’s head. It was all stressful and breathless, all intensity and no pause like one grating high pitch note instead of music, it felt oppressive, with poor contrast, and very badly paced. It made everything blur together and feel less relevant. The problem with that is it really takes you out of the story ; it’s hard to care when you know whatever is happening might not have a resolution, and it doesn’t put you in the shoes of the character. This was compounded by how mediocre the social media was, when it is usually used to bridge in the gaps. And then to finish : the structure was so uneven, especially in the second part of the season. Towards the middle we had some very short episodes with very underwhelming endings, and Vendredis that felt like non events, and there wasn’t a lot happening - and then, bam, ep 9, drama overload, almost like misery p*rn, and then a super rushed resolution in ep 10. Like they cared more about twists and giving the opposite of what was expected instead of solid coherent narrative and rhythm. The romantic back and forth felt repetitive as hell too. All in all, it made for a very unsatisfying live watching experience, pretty sure anyone who didn’t watch live would like it a lot more. 
- The last two episodes : Really, I could have overlooked all the problems with the season if they had given us a good ending, but...they really really didn’t. And contrasted with last season, where my problems were focused on the middle, for me the ending is really the worst part of this season. I didn’t dislike the controversial club clips, I liked having the insight into Eliott’s insecurities, but they should never have brought those up if they weren’t going to let him adress them properly. Having everything go to shit in Lola’s life at once felt like overkill - they really should have solved those problems earlier, and then dealt with a few ones properly, showed us Lola freaking out on her own, and taken out the bullshit at the high school. Thierry slapping her was also too much, he could just have said these clumsy things. She could have distanced herself from Maya instead of pushing her away again. Also, they really should have had this happen in episode 8 again, and given us a proper resolution. While the tower sequence was incredibly powerful, I pretty much liked nothing after that. It was so annoying that Eliott brushed off Lola’s apology because while he wasn’t wrong that he decided to get drunk himself, she still needed to apologize and actually state that she wanted to get better so she didn’t hurt her friends, so as a resolution it was very mediocre. Thierry recognizing they should have given Lola the choice to go the hospital was a step but really not enough. And the moments with Maya were cute sure but mostly cheesy and unearned. Same for the ending clip. Mostly it’s such an unsatisfying farewell to the old generation, and it really feels like they wanted us to force to move on - didn’t want to properly recognize the end of an era, gave us almost nothing about their BAC or their future plans, etc etc. Also, letting Charles talk and having Arthur and Alexia kiss again ? SO BAD. UGH. I will be forever disappointed they didn’t give us a Multi POV or at least sth better on social media. And not having Eliott’s POV or at least a real Elu conversation (pretty much all season...) so frustrating I will never not be bitter about that. So yeah. The season started so powerfully but went out with a whimper instead of a bang. That whole ‘romantic love solves everything!!!’ shtick...very undercooked tbh. 
Meh : 
- Mayla’s development : I wanted to stan them SO BAD. Like, wlw in skam (that doesn’t turn into a panphobic mess?) YES, all the way yes. Maya and Lola had great chemistry, great dynamic. I loved their first few clips, the kind of confrontational flirting, the boldness, it was like...damn girls ! we love a non useless lesbian ! But...somewhere along the way, their relationship really suffered from the wacky plot structure. They should have shown us more bonding before we got to the angsting (esp during first urbex night). Also, their first kiss was sweet but I hated the ‘you’re my addiction’ line and that kind of put a damper on it. I liked the scenes where they open up about difficult things, the love Maya showed to Lola’s scars, the dandelion symbolism was lovely, but it wasn’t balanced enough with other stuff, and I felt Maya was way too stoic at times. And I really, really didn’t like the ending, honestly. They kept a good balance all season showing Lola wasn’t relying entirely on romantic love, that her family and friends were also important - but saying ‘i’m okay as long as you’re here’ at the end...honestly that sounds unhealthy and codependent as fuck. I really wish they’d done a more subtle, taking it slow ending for them.
- The financial issues : Again a storyline with much potential that wasn’t dealt with properly. It’s really good that we got a main that wasn’t from an economically priviledged background. Especially it felt very relevant to Daphné’s storyline, with the shame she felt at her friends seeing her place, the pressure to make it work, tying into her ED, etc etc. But cutting off the power, the father not working going nowhere...it’s like the plotline meandered and then vanished into thin air. Instead of that, they could have given us a scene of Daphné freaking out over the bills like in OG w Vilde, keeping the focus on her for that plot because she’s the most affected ; and then in the end of the season the father taking them over from her and telling her he’s found another job and that those things shouldn’t be her responsibility. That would have been relevant, instead of just...a loose end.
- Family issues : The Lecomte family dynamic seemed fascinating to me at the start. The mom being this shadowy complicated figure. The inability of the father to deal with anything. Daphné being parentified, Lola becoming the symptom child. They could have done a lot with this, but in the end, it felt like it was brushed aside too easily by saying the mom sent letters so she wasn’t too bad and Thierry is making breakfast so he’s trying. Not enough. I wanted them to let Lola acknowledge she deserved better and that their parent’s crap wasn’t on her. That her mom should have looked for help and the other two shouldn’t have pretended everything was okay. In general, there is way too much pressure to overlook toxic parent behavior and I wish they’d been clearer about this. 
- Mental health portrayal : Some parts of it were really good. Showing Daphné’s ED, letting Eliott talk about his episodes and relapses, showing some of the dark sides of depression and addiction. They just needed to show more of the recovery, because that is often the representation that they lacked the most. I don’t blame them for showing the bad sides of the mental healhcare system (which is terribly outdated and dysfunctional in France, I’m speaking from experience) but they should have shown the good too. Like do they find recovery boring or something ? Because as a person w MI, that’s actually what I’m dying to see, and they’ve been a real letdown in that department. I also think they should have acknowledged that the Lecomte family has mental issues as a whole, that the mother should have gotten help, and the father probably needs it too (still think they should have gone to therapy as a group lol).
- Elu and Eliott’s development : Honestly, not a big fan of how they wrote Lucas in s5&s6, in a lot of clips he was the angry guy with a temper, I miss s4 Lucas who was so compassionate and showed real growth and emotional intelligence. Here it just felt like they were fitting his character to plot needs, and it’s so sad for a character who had such an amazing story development. Now, I loved the glimpses of domestic Elu we got, how Axel and Maxence really showed the intimacy that had grown between them, they really felt married with all the nonverbal conversations and touches, that was sweet. But it’s so annoying that they hinted at Lucas’s insecurities and Eliott’s lack of communications and just brushed it away with ‘oh they love each other they will be okay’ sure bitch but then show us how ? that’s the interesting stuff ? it really feels sometimes like the writer(s) didn’t like how strongly the fans focused on the romance when they wanted to be talking about MATURE dark stuff not that frilly fluffy romance shit *eyeroll* male writers who think they’re above that stuff is so annoying as is the conflating of dark and mature - anyway. Again I liked seeing Eliott in his element this season, he is really thriving, with his movie and the video store, and that made me very happy. I don’t think it’s unrealistic he didn’t make a lot of friends in uni - French university can be so isolating, there isn’t a campus or a vibrant social life like in the US, it’s a very common experience to feel lost and isolated for newbies and it was also my case - but ? Sofiane ? Idriss ??? They could have found a better excuse to implicate Lamifex in the movie making tbh, like Jo egging him on about her passion for directing or whatever, and Sofiane could have been there chilling with them it would have been so cool. I just wish Eliott would have had more of an arc like Daphné did. It wouldn’t have taken much, and since he is my favorite character, I will never not be disappointed at all the wasted potential. 
Yeah so in the end i think this was a very good story they didn’t entirely give themselves the right storytelling tools to tell. Like there is something in the way they prioritize certain moments over others that...I just find very frustrating and weird. So...flawed, but still very interesting overall.
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chrwrites · 4 years ago
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Take Me As You Please - Chapter 2
read on ao3
Ch 1
When Marinette got home, she was welcomed by the smell of basil and her mum’s warm smile “How was your day, dear?”
It was heavy, I feel like shit and I just want to go to sleep.
“It was alright” was all she said while she took a plate of fresh trofie with pesto and sat at the dining table.
Her parents talked about their day as Marinette forced herself to eat at least half the portion she was given, she wasn’t going to starve herself because her two-year crush found someone better than her, was she? She took another forkful of green covered pasta as she realized that that colour was the same as the eyes that looked at her just as a friend. Oh, didn’t her mind come up with weird connections.
She twirled the fork in her hand before she heard her dad’s voice call her name, and looked up from her plate to find a worried look on her parents’ face. She knew what was coming, she had been awfully silent for the whole meal and of course they had noticed despite her trying to hide it.
 “Are you alright?” her dad asked.
Of course I am! It’s not like Adrien has started dating my friend and I have to force myself to be happy for them and it sucks that I missed every opportunity I had to confess to him in the first place and I hate myself for this.
“Yeah! I’m just tired, today’s been a long day,” think Marinette, you’re the master of making up excuses “I spent the afternoon working on some new designs and Luka asked me if I could design something for his friend's band. I thought about what I could do so much that I got tired, that's all!” this time making up something wasn’t even difficult since it was kind of the truth. Marinette flashed a smile at them, thinking about it, she hadn’t texted Luka yet. She took her phone from her pocket and typed a quick message under the table.
Hey, I'm home!
“Oh, that’s great! What are you going to do?” Tom asked, eager to know what his daughter had in mind this time.
“I don’t know yet, I still have to talk about the whole concept with the band, in fact I should talk to Luka about it. I’m going to my room!” she got up from her chair, but as she was about to take her half full plate and put it away, her mum gently put a hand on hers to stop her “You don’t have to clean up tonight, I’ll take care of it. Go get some rest, dear” she said showing a reassuring smile.
“Thank you, mama” Marinette gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and walked out of the room.
She let out a sigh of relief as soon as she collapsed on the chaise longue in the corner of her room.
“Mariette, how are you feeling?” Tikki’s small voice talked to her ear hesitantly.
“Awful” was all she managed to say before tears started streaming from her eyes and the small Kwami floated around her face trying to stop her tears from falling, whispering words of comfort.
“It’s gonna be alright Marinette, you’re not alone” the red creature said sweetly when Marinette’s sobs got lighter.
“I-I know, if… if I can save Paris… someone not... liking me back is… nothing… right?” she blurted out. At least she could count on the little creature floating across her face for any of her problems, she could fully be herself with Tikki without being afraid to give in too much information since they knew everything. The Kwami also helped her avoid to be swallowed by dark thoughts and the risk that getting akumatized implied, Marinette couldn’t be other than grateful for them.
“You need time for yourself dear, just this. And if you really want to compare this experience to what you’ve gone through as Ladybug you can, but don’t use it to belittle what you’re feeling right now, or to not feel it at all. Unfortunately, you have to go through this before you can get over it” Tikki said in a soft voice and put a small hand on her face, the delicate touch refreshing Marinette’s irritated skin. How long had she been crying? “I know it’s gonna be hard, but it will get better. I promise” the small creature concluded and floated around the room to get a tissue for her holder. Marinette thanked them and wiped the tears from her face, giving her Kwami a small smile as they gave her a tiny kiss on her cheek. She laid on her back in the chaise longue, taking deep and steady breaths to make sure she had completely calmed down before standing up.
Her heart still hurt when she got up, but there was a tiny hint of hope in her to make that weight somewhat easier to carry. She decided to take a shower before changing into her pyjamas and when she got to bed, she checked her phone. There were messages from the groupchat she had with her friends, a text from Alya, and Luka’s answer to her text.
She skimmed through the messages in the groupchat and found a few memes that made her chuckle. Tikki, who was lying on her shoulder, gave her a curious look.
In her message, Alya asked if it was alright if she could come over in the afternoon, Marinette typed in an affirmative answer and then checked Luka’s chat.
so you did remember to text me uh?
i was starting to get worried ahah
Yeah, sorry about that
I got distracted
it’s fine mari, you don’t owe me any explanation
i’m glad you got home safe
are you feeling any better?
Marinette stared at her screen for a moment, she didn’t know why she was surprised at the fact that Luka cared about her when he always made it clear, he was the most genuine guy she’s ever known apart from A– never mind, if she thought about him she would've started crying again.
Yeah, thank you for asking
I don't feel like thinking about it tho
She was typing something to divert the attention from her, something like how are YOU feeling? She really wanted to focus on him, they were always talking about her and how she felt. Luka so selflessly put himself aside for her and never talked about things that bothered him, but Marinette felt like he needed to let out his thoughts too, and she knew he did it through music but she wanted to be there for him just like he was there for her. Her phone vibrated in her hands as a new message appeared in the chat.
i might have something that won’t make you think about it ;)
There was an mp3 file titled “sleep alone” attached to the message, was that a new song? What would it be about? The title didn’t really convince her, it made her imagine it was a song about being lonely and it really wasn’t what she needed, but she trusted Luka enough to know he would never do anything that could’ve made her feel worse. It must have been the quiet tune she heard him play when she got on the Liberty that same afternoon. Eager to listen to his new creation, she grabbed her earphones from her nightstand, put an earbud on and passed the other one to her Kwami in order to let them listen too.
When she pressed play, the sound of Lukas’s acoustic guitar filled her head. It wasn’t the mellow song he was playing on the deck that afternoon. This one was energetic yet sweet, and she could hear Luka's voice humming along the upbeat melody. The happy, comforting sound made Marinette feel lighter. The melody ran quicker before ending with a slower, gentler tune as she was smiling in awe at her phone screen. Her heart felt full and less lonely, she wondered how Luka could be so good at comforting people just with his guitar, or through his light touches.
“Wow, that was very good!” the carefree feeling of the song caught Tikki as well who was now flying around Marinette’s face happily singing the melody, Marinette watched the red spot dance around her delighted and couldn’t help but agree.
LUKA I LOVE THIS IT’S BEAUTIFUL
YOU’RE SO TALENTED
THANK YOU THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED
I FEEL WAY BETTER NOW
But why did you name it sleep alone?
I was expecting something completely different given the title tbh
Of course she had to ask, it wouldn’t be like her not wanting to know all the details behind the songs he wrote. Sometimes he would tell her, sometimes he would be cryptic and she wouldn’t be able to grasp the concept behind his art. Marinette knew Luka was very reserved about the meaning behind the songs, probably the only people to know the real meaning behind them were Juleka and Rose because they were directly involved in the whole song writing process. Marinette remembered Luka saying something about him having song writing sessions with someone else, but she never questioned it further since she didn’t want to sound invasive.
you’ll know it if i get to convince the band to play it next week
i’m happy it helped you feel better
now get some sleep mari, it’s late and you need to rest
goodnight xx.
Ugh, fine
I’ll help you convince them if I have to
Goodnight Luka, thank you for being there for me
Marinette put her phone on the nightstand, wished Tikki goodnight and closed her eyes. She drifted to sleep as Luka’s song was playing in her head like a lullaby, making her feel safe and peaceful. She couldn’t imagine that her friend, in his bedroom, was still staring at his phone screen.
That’s exactly what I needed.
Knowing that he made Marinette happy, Luka felt fulfilled, and he tried to ignore the pit forming in his stomach. That’s exactly what I needed. He knew she didn’t mean this the way he wished she meant it, but he couldn’t help but think that he could give her what she needed. That’s exactly what I needed. The words didn’t leave his mind. That’s exactly what I needed. He wanted to be everything she needed. He wanted to hold her, comfort her, hold her hand, take her out… Hell, he’d even serenade her. That’s exactly what I needed.
But to her, Luka was just a friend, a very close friend indeed, but still a friend. Thank you for being there for me. He could only dream about keeping her closer the way more than friends did and holding her in his sleep. Maybe he had to stop thinking about her in that way and not write songs about her anymore, but every time he looked at Marinette, the melody of her heart played in his head louder and louder. He wished he could listen to it forever. That’s exactly what he needed.
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arotechno · 4 years ago
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The Heartless: Chapter 18
Read on Inkitt
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Chapter XVIII: in which some reunions are bittersweet
I could not remember blacking out, but when I opened my eyes next, I was on my back with bright, leafy green branches filling the sky high above my head. After a few moments, recognition set in; this was the oak tree, the same one I would perch in nearly every night and look out for trouble, trying to spot Petra on her way back from town.
If I had a heart, it would have clenched. Petra—I wondered with a heavy sense of grief whether she was even still alive.
“Welcome back,” a somber voice piped up beside me.
I leapt out of my skin, scrambling to balance myself upright. There was Petra, as if on cue, hair now chopped shoddily above her chin. Her eyes, in the months since I’d last seen her, had taken on a haunted look too mature for a fourteen-year-old child. She had a bow and arrow slung over her shoulder—mine, the old bow I had given her before I left.
“Petra!” I exclaimed. “What… What happened?”
“I found you passed out in the middle of the village and dragged you here.”
“No, no, that’s not— You know what I mean!”
Petra exhaled brusquely and averted her eyes to the treetops. “A while after you left, the royal guard came to the village. Burnt it to the ground. I saw them approaching while I was in town, and managed to warn most of the village to flee, with Marley’s help.” She paused, biting her lip. “Everyone who left has long since moved on by now, probably in hiding in other villages. There was no use coming home to a pile of rubble, only to see if they’d come back a second time. I know Marley took a lot of folks with her. Maybe they aren’t even in the kingdom anymore, I don’t really know.”
“And... Bertrand?”
“He refused to leave his study, no matter how much I begged.”
“Oh.”
“I couldn’t save everyone.”
“Petra, I’m—”
“I know it’s because of you, Ace. I’ve spent enough time out there to know that the king was assassinated by one of the Heartless, and something tells me you had something to do with that.”
Finally, she returned my eye contact once more. Her mouth was set in a permanent frown. It was then that I realized this was not exactly a welcome reunion.
“I… Yes,” I admitted. “I killed him. It was a lapse in judgement. I didn’t think they’d—they thought I was dead. Why would they come here?”
“Do you really think they needed a reason?” Petra snapped. “Ace, why would you do that? Why would you put us all in danger like that? Sure, we didn’t have much, but why would you throw every good thing we did have away just for your moment of glory?”
I pulled absentmindedly at the grass beneath me, twisting the blades around between my fingers. “The royal guard… killed my parents. I was going to confront him, and then… then he was dead. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t regret getting his blood on my hands like that. And, evidently… the entire village’s.”
Petra averted her gaze again.
“I’m sorry to hear that,” she murmured, fist clenching in her lap until her knuckles went white. “But you know what, Ace? That’s not even the worst of it. It’s been months since then, and all this time I’ve been coming back here over and over waiting for you even though I’m so mad that you abandoned us and left me here. Where have you been?”
It was then that I remembered everything I had wanted to tell her before I found what was left of the village. I told her everything, from invading the royal palace with Knife Boy to being dumped in the woods to waking up in Frida’s house to reuniting with Basil and everything in between. When I told her the truth about the curse, she leapt to her feet and began screaming at me, letting loose the kind of pain and anguish that can only be felt by a child who has been lied to her whole life.
“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” she yelled. “I’ve been here on my own for months because the royal guard finally decided to take us all out, and now you’re telling me we never deserved ANY of this? That all this time we were struggling in poverty and isolation is just because everyone hates us, not because there’s something wrong with us? How is that supposed to make this less terrible?” Petra started crying then, hot and angry tears rolling down her face.
“It isn’t,” I replied gently. “I just thought you deserved to know the truth.”
“I don’t care anymore! Whether we’re broken or not, we’re still not allowed to be happy! What’s the point?” Petra snatched the bow and arrow off her shoulder and flung it across the dirt, sending stiff feathers flying into the air. A deep, ragged breath escaped her lungs before she continued, quieter, “Just when you think things are working out, they find another way to ruin you. By taking out the king, Ace, you brought us one step forward but many, many steps back.”
“I know.”
Petra sighed and dropped back down into the grass, sitting cross-legged with her chin in her hands. She sniffled once or twice and wiped the lingering tears from her cheeks with the backs of her hands. We sat there in silence for a few moments, as the reality of what our lives had swiftly turned into began to sink in.
“You’re going to leave me here again, aren’t you?” she whispered after a couple of minutes.
My stomach lurched, and I knew that after all that both of us had been through, I could not lie to her.
“You could come with me,” I suggested instead.
“What, and leave home?” Petra shook her head, smiling despite herself. “I couldn’t, not after everything.”
“There’s nothing left here, Petra. It’d just be you.”
Petra frowned at the dirt, yanking blades of grass and twirling them between her fingers.
“It’s different for you, Ace. Home for you was always something far-off, like some fantasy you got to live as a child where you had parents who loved you and tried to keep you safe. Me? This place, and the curse that I always thought came along with it, is all I’ve ever known.”
“I lost my home, so I made a new one, over and over again. You can do the same.”
She looked back up at me and furrowed her brow. “Easy for you to say. You knew life before this. For you, the Village of the Heartless gets to be an unfortunate dark patch in between two perfect realities where you get to be safe and live happily ever after. I don’t have that luxury. This village was your temporary hell, but it’s my hometown.”
It was a child’s oversimplification; when I thought of Swallow’s Point and its inhabitants, the ever-present fear of being discovered as Heartless, any image I could conjure up in my mind was far from idyllic. The Village of the Heartless had become home to me for many years, but I had also indirectly been the cause of its demise. I couldn’t deny that Petra’s words had some truth to them, however exaggerated.
I paused, considering my next words carefully. “Listen, Petra, like it or not, I can’t stay here. I’m a fugitive,” I pointed out. “The entire kingdom thinks I’m dead, and if I’m ever caught, I can assure you they will not hesitate to try to kill me again, and this time, they will make sure they succeed. You can go back and stay with Esther, tell her the truth if you want, or tell her I’m dead, I don’t care. But I can’t stay here, not now.”
Petra averted her eyes again, pulling her knees up to her chest.
“No, I’m coming with you,” she muttered.
I had been expecting more of a fight. “You are?”
“I don’t think I have a choice.” Petra at last raised her eyes to meet mine again, and I saw the glint of determination behind the last few tears she hadn’t been able to suppress. “I’m not going to let you get yourself killed just to make me happy by staying here. And I’m not going to let you leave me again, either.”
I watched in awe as she clambered to her feet and walked over behind the tree, retrieving the bow and arrow she had thrown in her anger.
“But if we’re heading out together again”—she held them out to me—“you’re going to be needing this.”
I took it and ran my thumb and forefinger along the thin maple of the bow, instantly being called back to the day I received it from Marley, and the first time I succeeded at hitting the targets I had set up behind Bertrand’s house out of old tin cans and spoiled gourds, and the nights I spent perched in that same oak tree looking for trouble after dark. This was not the bow with which I had condemned my village, but the one with which I had defended it; Petra now entrusted me with that duty again, although there was nothing left to defend.
The incongruity of this responsibility weighed heavily on me as we dusted the dirt from our pants and set off up the hill through what was once the Village of the Heartless, headed toward the back woods in the direction of the commune. I came to a halt at the top of the hill, frozen stiff before the remains of Bertrand’s house, the tiny run-down cottage I had called home for so many years. Like the rest of the village, it was only burnt rubble now, sprouting soft and verdant with the new growth of spring. I was struck with the realization that Bertrand had died still believing he was a failure for never breaking a curse that had never existed; I wondered briefly whether in his final moments he thought of me fondly or cursed himself for ever giving me shelter.
The weight of the suffering I had caused rose up from the blood-soaked soil and flooded the vacant spaces where my heart should be, and it settled there, heavy and still.
What a monstrous thing it was to be human.
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wordsablaze · 4 years ago
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4~ i’ll stand there so brave
tell me your problems (i’ll chase them away) Internal scars can be difficult to deal with but Eskel vows to heal any that Jaskier is weighed down by if it’s the last thing he does…
A/N: so this took me a while to update but you can blame the sun for being too warm for me to function... yay summer (!)
@random-nerd-3 @betaray-jones @w-s-kibela @cloudspeck @in-love-with-writing002 @screaming-flapjacks @booboomuffin
previous chapter
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They reach the next town a few hours before nightfall.
Jaskier perks up as soon as they see an inn, all but jumping to the ground and almost toppling over entirely in his haste. He manages to carefully take down his lute before Eskel has even brought Scorpion to a stop.
“I’ll get us a room!” he declares before promptly freezing on the spot, looking up at Eskel as if waiting for permission.
Eskel sighs inwardly but smiles as softly as he can make himself. “Sounds good.”
It’s obvious Jaskier was wondering if Eskel would even want to share a room with him and somehow, that thought stings more than most injuries he’s faced on the path. Because of course he does, there’s no reason for him not to.
He’s glad it’s almost dark because it means the stableboy doesn’t have a chance to be scared off by his scars, simply promising to ensure Scorpion is taken care of properly.
“Go find a corner, darling,” Jaskier whispers to him as soon as he enters the inn, gently pushing him towards one of the walls.
Before he can even think to ask if there’s a room available, Jaskier has started performing, his voice carrying perfectly across the rather large room and causing most people to at least turn to look at him, if not start smiling or singing along.
Eskel doesn’t recognise the song but it seems plenty of people do because there are soon enough drinks going round for one of the barmaids to place on in front of him with a smile. “Free of charge, as promised.”
“Promised?” Eskel echoes, frowning.
She frowns back for a split second before nodding her head at Jaskier, who’s currently moving around the room to take requests. “You’re with him, right?”
Eskel nods.
“Well then, as we promised him: food and drink with no charge if he can liven the place up.”
She disappears to serve someone else before Eskel can thank her so he just accepts the ale and sits back, tracking Jaskier as he switches songs after stopping by two young women who look like they’re on the verge of tears.
They’re laughing by the time the song - something about a princess slaying the beast instead of being rescued from it - has finished, as much to Jaskier’s credit as it is to Eskel’s amazement.
“Play the one about coins!” someone shouts.
“Yeah, let’s hear about the devil!”
“Go on, bard!”
Eskel bristles as Jaskier pauses, biting his lip hard enough to break the skin that had barely healed from before; apparently, it’s some kind of nervous habit of his.
For a moment, Eskel thinks Jaskier will refuse. But then Jaskier exhales slowly and grins. “Why, of course! A great choice to end the evening!”
His ale - both the first and second mugs - long since finished, Eskel focuses entirely on Jaskier.
“When a humble bard…”
Focuses on the way he’s the perfect picture of professional.
Focuses on how his fingers play the right tune but his heart so clearly isn’t in it, not that anyone seems to pick up on that as they laugh or sing along, a few of them even tossing coins Jaskier’s way as he passes them.
Focuses on how there's something so brave in Jaskier singing about someone who'd hurt him so deeply. And not only that, but he's doing it to support witchers despite everything - it seems only logical to be impressed.
“A friend of humanity… ” Jaskier finishes, bowing ceremoniously as he grabs his lute case from he’d propped it up to keep it safe.
Moments later, he rather unceremoniously collapses into the seat opposite Eskel.
“You okay there, bardling?” Eskel asks softly, once he’s sure there are no prying eyes left.
Jaskier nods, but the way he lets his head fall onto the table between them says otherwise.
He stays in that position until two plates of food are placed on their table, at which point he sits up straight and positively beams at the woman who’d brought them. “Our most sincere gratitude for keeping your promise.”
She laughs, glancing between the two of them. “The gratitude is mutual.”
Eskel smiles at her. “Thank you.”
“Is that basil?” Jaskier asks incredulously, surprising both Eskel and the woman, who nods slowly, as if expecting a complaint.
But Jaskier only grins cheekily. “I shall have to write a ballad in my gratitude to your hospitality and whoever is in charge of your skilled kitchens.”
The woman blushes before grabbing Eskel’s empty mug, muttering something about it being their pleasure before leaving them to their food. And as soon as she’s gone, Jaskier lets his head fall back onto the table.
“Jaskier?” Eskel asks, briefly worrying if there’s a hidden injury he should know about.
Jaskier groans softly but sits back up again with a small and oddly insincere smirk. “I believe that’s what most people call me, yes.”
This time, Eskel can tell exactly how much Jaskier is affected by having to relive Posada, even if he doesn’t always show it. But he doesn’t want to address it, knowing that it might mean Jaskier shuts himself off again. Or worse, decides not to travel with him after all.
Instead, he gestures to their plates. “Aren’t you going to try the basil?”
Jaskier blinks slowly before laughing, the shadows in his expression halfway replaced with amusement. “Only if we both do, darling,” he agrees.
And so they do.
It seems neither of them are used to taking their time, though, because the inn is still relatively buzzing by the time they’ve both finished their very satisfying meals.
“There’s someone with a siren problem that wants to meet you tomorrow,” Jaskier tells him as they make their way upstairs.
“What?” Eskel tilts his head to the right, confused.
Jaskier is immediately surrounded by waves of panic. “Oh, gods, I didn’t mean to assume you’d want to take the contract or anything. I was just- I mean, she’s the one that came to me and I thought you- But we can just, uh, decline if you already had plans or-”
“It’s okay, Jaskier, I’m not mad,” Eskel interrupts, placing a hand on Jaskier’s arm.
He doesn’t know what he’d expected but he hadn’t predicted that Jaskier would melt the same way his panic does, letting out a soft sigh as he leans into the touch.
“Which room is ours?” Eskel asks, not really wanting to continue this conversation, or any other one for that matter, where they could be overhead.
Jaskier instantly snaps out of his guilty daze and leads them to the room he’d gotten them, a smaller one with only a bed and a window. But it’s still better than nothing at such late notice and Eskel is grateful for it.
“Did she tell you it was a siren?” Eskel asks eventually, not liking the uneasy silence between them.
Jaskier looks almost startled to be addressed but then shakes his head. “Not exactly, but there aren’t exactly a lot of creatures that specialise in luring handsome men away with songs in the middle of the night, are there?”
Taking a risk, Eskel smirks. “You would know better than I, bardling.”
“What? I wouldn’t know more than you witchers even if- hey!” Jaskier’s confusion transforms into an affronted pout as he folds his arms. “I do not lure anyone anywhere. It’s hardly my fault if they offer me their company, is it?”
Eskel is just glad Jaskier hadn’t taken offence. He’s also pretty surprised that his idea of a joke had matched someone else’s idea of a joke but he’s aware it might just be Jaskier and his rather unique personality.
“If you say so,” Eskel settles for.
Jaskier grumbles and throws his doublet at Eskel, who barely manages to catch it despite his enhanced reflexes.
But as soon as he does, Jaskier’s eyes widen and he steps closer to Eskel. “Wait no, don’t crumple it!”
“You’re the one who threw it,” Eskel points out, bemused.
Jaskier pouts again, and Eskel swears that no other man would be capable of looking so childish in such a surprisingly dignified way.
But he throws it back anyway. Or rather, hands it back, since Jaskier is close enough to do so. He’s also close enough for Eskel to feel the surprised relief that radiates from him as he carefully folds the doublet and places it atop his lute case.
It hadn’t struck Eskel until now that Jaskier doesn’t have any other belongings with him. But now he feels self-conscious at having two bags worth of possessions where Jaskier only has a lute, even though he knows that he needs the potions and the spare clothes and the extra room for rations.
And Jaskier must have pulled the shirt he’d given to Eskel from somewhere , right? Eskel figures he’d stashed his belongings somewhere before they’d set off and resolves to ask him about them later.
“Are you going to keep your armour on all night?” Jaskier asks after a minute or so of Eskel being rooted in the same spot.
Truth be told, he was just wondering whether they’d share the bed again.
“You know, I’ve heard that sleeping is far more comfortable when you’re not covered in spikes,” Jaskier continues, smirking again.
Eskel makes a face at that but Jaskier only takes it as an invitation, helping him out of his armour before pulling him to the bed and flopping down onto it, raising an eyebrow up at him. “Care to join me?”
“No,” Eskel replies just for the sake of it, “move over.”
Jaskier laughs before doing exactly that, folding his arms under his head as he shifts his gaze to the ceiling and Eskel settles besides him.
“You don’t mind, do you? That I arranged a potential contract on your behalf?” Jaskier asks softly, still staring at the ceiling.
Eskel shakes his head, wondering how Jaskier doesn’t know that it makes life so much easier to have a middle man in the equation. But then he remembers that Geralt is probably responsible for Jaskier not knowing how valuable his social skills are.
Honestly, he’s never wanted to hit someone so badly.
“Of course not,” Eskel replies, wishing he could explain better but still not quite used to the whole talking-for-so-long thing.
Jaskier smiles regardless and turns so he’s facing Eskel, already curling closer to him. “And you won’t leave before I wake up?”
Eskel suspects Jaskier is either a little more tired or a little more drunk than he’d intended to be so he just humours him and shakes his head. “No, I won’t. I’ll be here,” he promises.
Almost like a child, Jaskier nods, shuffling even closer. “Thank you, Eskel.”
The warmth that spreads through Eskel is most likely due to Jaskier’s presence rather than his words because why would someone using his name be powerful enough to change his body temperature?
Jaskier is filled with so much trust, Eskel notes, that he falls asleep within a few minutes. And it amazes him as much as it saddens him for he can’t imagine why Geralt would give up someone so awfully kind at heart.
But he doesn’t want to think of his brother’s idiocy unless he absolutely has to, which he currently doesn’t, so he just wraps an arm around Jaskier and closes his eyes.
It’s definitely strange to have someone choose to be as close to him as possible, especially when they’re both at their most vulnerable, but he can’t deny the smile on his face that only the darkness will ever see.
He also can’t deny one of the best nights of sleep he’s ever had.
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i lowkey feel they get more ooc every time i write them, oops. sorry about that...
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